Triforce! - YoGPoD 4: Na na na, nana na naa na

Episode Date: March 7, 2009

The guys cover the usual bum chat with generous amounts of fluff and singing. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Please play responsibly. This episode is brought to you by Peloton. Spring is a great time to start a new workout routine. With the weather warming up, it feels easier to get into the rhythm of things. Whether you have 20 minutes or an hour for a Pilates class or an outdoor guided walk, Peloton has everything you need to help you get going. Get a head start on summer with Peloton at onepeloton.ca. Hello and welcome to Yogscast. Hello, and welcome to Yogscast. Hello. You are listening to the Yogpod.

That's me like Terry Wogan! How did I turn into Terry Wogan? You're listening, me artist, to the Yogpod. See, when I try and do Terry Wogan it doesn't sound anything like him. But when I try and do a Welsh accent it ends up sounding like Terry Wogan. You're listening to the Yacht Pod. Well, this is from Ripley's Believe It or Not big compendium book of facts.

Is it like 1984 edition, like you got it for your third birthday or something? No, it's a... Jesus, can you hear that? Hear me opening the fucking book? It's a fairly new book, but obviously... I mean, it's got a story from 1985 in there. Did your mother buy it for Christmas?

One year. No, I had to buy it myself. Why did you buy it yourself? Oh, you bought it yourself for Christmas. Are you asking me why I went out and bought a book for myself? Is that a weird thing to do? You went out and bought a book For yourself Why didn't you buy the Guinness Book of Records?

Surely that's a superior Reference book It's boring It's for the people who are in the record books For eating a lot of pies Well done You ate a lot of pies Well done

Ftwm out for like ten years. There's probably something here about that. There's something about a guy who grows horns. Well, we'll get to it eventually. So don't worry about finding it. Is that it? We're just going to read from this book just over and over again

through the thousands of little articles. Oh, I've got such a good anecdote about library fines. Everybody's got a story, haven't they, about library fines? I don't know, I don't think I have. Oh, come on, how can you not have a tale? A long, wonderful, winding, feral cat of a tale. I'm banned from telling anecdotes anyway on the Yoggpod. After that awful snow anecdote that I told that just went on forever and eventually got cut. Which is the reason why we're not doing a Snowcast Part 2. The thing is it had no real point to it.

It was a very odd story. Very odd. It had no hook. It... I mean, there was nothing interesting about it at all. There was... There was no, like, conflict or drama or irony. There was no moral.

Humour. I've learnt nothing from it. It was a complete waste of time. Totally. I came away from that story just older, but no wiser. Just older. Do you know, I've got a massive grey patch in my beard.

It's very odd. Because I'm only 30. Is it yoghurt? And I've got this big fucking patch. Is it yoghurt? What did you say? Yeah, is it yoghurt? It's not yoghurt. Why would I keep yoghurt? What did you say? Yeah, is it yoghurt? It's not yoghurt.

Why would I keep yoghurt in my beard? That's weird. Not keep it, just like splash it on your face when you were, you know, eating. Splash? Can you even splash yoghurt? I mean, it's quite a viscous liquid, isn't it? viscous liquid, isn't it? Well, I'm sure if you like the word swimming in yoghurt, you could splash

someone with the yoghurt. Where would you go swimming in yoghurt? If you were swimming, no, just theoretically imagine that there was a swimming pool full of yoghurt, right? Could you splash someone with the yoghurt? What the fuck are you talking about?

What are you talking about? A swimming... A swimming pool full of yogurt? It's like a scientific question. So, I mean, this is going to be... Is this like some zen philosophical thing? No, serious scientific question. Can you splash yogurt onto your beard?

I mean, there is kind of really liquidy, watery yoghurt, which you get in like bottles, isn't there? What was that called? Yop. Was it Yop? Yop. Yop. Yop. Oh, God!

Yop! That was odd, wasn't it? It was just, wasn't it? It was just... It was liquidy, weird, watery yoghurt. You just drink. Drink yoghurt. You just chug it down.

I think things like that are designed for your children's lunchbox. Yop, me mama. Yop, yop, ye mama. Yop, for when de morning come. Goodness me. That was the advert. That was certainly out of tune enough to warrant being on the Yob Pod. I tried to actually

sing that in tune. You sounded like um, who's that black guy who died recently? Hello? No, not Lionel Richie. Barry White. You sounded like Barry White. Barry White died recently.

Yeah. Let's check this. Hmm. Six years ago. He died six years ago. Six years ago. Oh dear. How is that recent? How is that recent? That's six years ago.

Why do you pick up on stuff? That's relatively recent. Wikipedia, man. Wikipedia. Like, I can call you on any bullshit fact that you throw at me. Died recently. See, that immediately got my alarm bells ringing there. What do you...

Oh, God. 2003. So, you're saying I sound like an out-of-tune, dead, large black man? Yes, yes. When you did the Yop advert song. God, how can we talk about Yop again? I didn't say I didn't like it. I didn't say I didn't enjoy it. I enjoyed it, man.

It was great. Do you want me to serenade you? Go on, man. It was great. Do you want me to serenade you? Go on, then. Hello. Hi. Is it me you're looking for? I can see it remember the lyrics. I just thought I'd point that out, in case you didn't catch on to the fact. I thought they were the lyrics,

those just random sort of dum-de-dum noises. No, I mean, Lionel Richie from... You know, he was from the days where they had proper lyrics to songs and they just didn't, you know, sing na-na-na-na-na. Oh, yeah.

Not like nowadays. Yeah, like Tina Barrett's new song. Fucking music these days. And the theme music from Katamari. nowadays. Yeah, like Tina Barrett's new song. Fucking music these days. And the theme music from Katamari Damacy. What? You know the game that you play

that you roll up things and there's like a king of the stars. Have you not heard of this game? Katamari. You're talking about that weird green monster-y shape with like a massive cylinder cheeks thing. It's like a Teletubbies.

Yeah, the king. Yeah. But it's green. They're all weird creatures. And there's some sort of Japanese game that's just become a massive 4chan meme. Oh god is it? The music's quite good. You know it's like na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na That's something completely different.

Isn't that Airwolf? Airwolf. That's Black Beauty. That's Black Beauty. That's Black Beauty. I mean, Airwolf was black and it was beautiful, but it wasn't a horse. Well identified that that was Black Beauty. I don't know why that was in my head.

Okay, Airwolf is... Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. Stop it. Oh, for fuck's sake. Okay, Airwolf is... Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na Now you have to say nah. Nah. That is terrible. Both doing it at different points in the fucking tune. Oh, man. Airwolf. Knight Rider, but with a helicopter, wasn't it? Mmm, your pod you are listening to.

Okay, think of a famous song. A really famous song that everybody knows. Love in This Club by Usher featuring Young Jeezy. What? Wow! Okay. I was thinking like maybe something by the Beatles but I mean that's good. That's good as well. Okay Sing, sing the song with na's. Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na No, I'm not saying it would be awkward in terms of the actual semantics of the lyrics. I mean, if you had to write it down, it would be very simple. I mean, yeah, you just copy and paste the word na 200 times. Na na na, na na na na na, na na na, na na. What is love?

Baby don't hurt me Yes, yes, had a way That was brilliant Wow Is it my turn? I feel much better about myself now Yes, your turn Na na na na na

Na na na na na, na na na na na, na na na na na, na na na na na, na na na na na na. It's Joe Dolce with Shut Up Your Face. Yeah, it is. Well done. Hooray! Na na na na na na Na na na na na Na na na na na na Na na na na na na Na na na na na na Na na na na na Na na na na na na

Na na na na na na Na na na na na na Na na na na na na Na na na na na na Wow That was Alice Cooper Welcome to the Jungle Na na na na na na na na na na na na! Ha ha ha! Wow. That was Alice Cooper, Welcome to the Jungle. Alice Cooper?

It's not Alice Cooper! It's Guns N' Roses! Oh, shit. Oh my god. What did you think of that rendition, though? The thing is, I got it straight away, but I had to let you carry on doing it, because it was so good. See, this is much better. I'm going to unmute Lamadia for a second.

Let's check in with Lamadia. Lamadia, hello. She hasn't been talking. Yes, hello. How's it going? How's the show going? Fine. Okay. Wow. Fine. Brilliant. Th thumbs up from lamadia how many yog stars would you give it at 50 30 30 wow 13. christ Maybe Lemadia could do one. Yeah, can you do one, Lemadia? Yeah, we want to hear you go nah. I feel like we need a female one. Nah. Oh.

Oh. What song was that? Don't know. Now, I have to think of something for Comeback. You do realise we don't have similar music tastes at all? Really? What do you like listening to? Mostly girly music. Britney Spears. Under the Sea. Hannah Montana. Not Hannah Montana. Why were you singing the Lobster songs? From The Little M little mermaid that's girly music isn't it? what's that good? oh right I see

boys to men fuck off boys to men I can't believe that was one of Tina Beret's influences na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na A Soundgarden? I don't know what that is. Oh my God! You've never heard of Soundgarden? I know you still have, but I've not really listened to their music very much. And you didn't sing it perfectly well. Oh God. It's quite a hard song to sing, actually.

But then it's Chris Cornell singing, which, you know, can be quite difficult to... ape. Have you heard Chris Cornell's new song is it about puppies I was thinking of using it um in one of the autocasts it's called scream then we'd probably google scream 2009 probably just be removed, wouldn't it? Oh god, this song is terrible! What is this? Oh my god! What is it? What the fuck is this? The album is produced with Timbaland. Oh god. What's Timbaland doing with Chris Cornell? Fuck off!

Oh god. what is this? Can you imagine? I love that you say that! What is Timbaland doing with Chris Cornell? I want to cry! I can't imagine you turning to Timbaland and saying fuck off! I wish I could! This is terrible! Oh god, no! Why has he done this? Why has he done this? Chris, why? It's a good song, honeydew! Oh Jesus! Do you know what would make it a good song? A fuckload of guitars would make it a good song. song a fuckload of guitars would make it a good song not some shitty music that sounds like someone got a fucking Casio keyboard and pressed the demo button this is terrible this is worse than cancer oh god the fucking comments on youtube as well Jesus Jesus. Jesus.

Yeah, people aren't happy. It's not just me. Fuck you, Chris, you motherfucker. See, that is quite the comment. You ready yet, LaMaria? No. I can't believe this. I cannot believe it.

He's gone from fucking Temple of the Dog to this. Where did it all go wrong? Where did it all go wrong? I'm watching a Russian guy fall off a tractor. Alright, alright. Well, you know, I need you to be doing something important. What the fuck? I-I need you to be doing something important! What the fuck?! His bum comes out! It's terrible! Na na na na naa

Na na na na naa Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na No, no. So what was that? Oh God, I feel awkward now. Sorry, I'm watching this Russian guy. What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? Yeah, I'm watching a guy from the Canary Islands light up a cigarette and fly in a high-air balloon. Yeah, I'm watching a video of this cat playing Hamlet.

I'm watching a video of this guy, he's got three buttocks and he's lighting fireworks. He's got three buttocks? Yeah, two anuses. Or ani, I believe is plural. Let me link you this fucking Russian tractor video. I don't think you're being very professional about this, Sefos. Is he drunk? Okay... Okay...

Okay, this is pretty funny. Oh my god! The impact of him hitting the fucking ground! He hits the ground so hard his trousers fall down and his bum comes out. He must be shit-faced. The thing is, listeners to the YogPod are now going to want to watch this video. So either we cut out all of this chat about the video, or we somehow include a link to it somewhere.

Just read out the URL. Okay, it's h-t-t-p-colon-forward-slash-forward-slash-w-w-w-dot-y-o-u-t-u-p-e-dot-c-o-m-forward-slash-w-a-t-c-h-question-mark-w-a-t-c-h-question-mark-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w-w- dot com forward slash w a t c h question mark v equals of the case q of the case c. Stop it. How about I add it to my favourites and then people can click on it through my profile. Yeah, that might work better actually. Or you could just have like a tiny URL link, or something. Okay. http://tinyurl.com Russian arse. One word. Russian arse. Have you... have you just made that?

Yes. It's a magnificent video though. He's just so shit-faced and he's for some reason trying to drive a tractor. You're listening to the Yonk Pog. Hello! listening to the Yonk Pong. Yeah. Hello! That was a Chinese Lionel Richie. Hello!

Is it me you're looking for? You know when I said we were going to turn over a new leaf and do this like really well? How's that working out? oh my god oh god the thing is i mean this is not going to be as bad as the last one though and that's kind of i've kind of been a bit um a bit less inhibited about it. Because, you know, I realise that we've already reached our nadir. So nothing could possibly be worse than that.

Nadir. Where's that? It's the lowest point. Oh. In the world? Well, no, like, Zenith, right, is the highest point. And nadir is the lowest point. Really? Yes.

It's quite odd that I, you know, I did a degree in astrophysics. I didn't finish. I'll just, you know, put that in there. But I did a degree in astrophysics without knowing anything at all about astronomy. Do you reckon that's why you didn't finish it? Well, no.

I mean, most of it's got absolutely nothing to do with astronomy anyway. I mean, it's all pretty much the... It's very boring, really. There's a lot of nuclear physics flux and light. Lots of stuff to do with light. Because that's all

we have to go on. Light. That's it. How do I get Tina Brett's music to play on her MySpace? Um, you might have it blocked with something, I don't know. It just automatically started playing for me. It plays on other people's pages,

but not hers. There's about 20 fucking pop-ups. Oh! I've got a different MySpace page for Tina Barrett. What? I've got, different I've got a different MySpace page For Tina Barrett What? I've got There's two She's got two MySpaces Oh my god

But they've each got A similar amount of views Not the same though What the hell? And one of them The one you were looking at Hasn't had a comment on it Since the 2nd of November Whereas The other one The one I were looking at hasn't had a comment on it since the 2nd of November.

Whereas the other one, the one I was looking at, has like 10 comments in the last week. It's the only one from any of our... No. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh well. Shit.

But that's because they wouldn't know. I'm sure we mentioned it in the Babby Murlock video. Yeah, we only mentioned it offhand. Oh, wow, this has got some even better things. Full name Tina Ann, Ann Barrett. We now know her middle name. Nicknames Tina Bell, Teenie and Teen. Oh, this is terrible. Shoe size 4.

Wow. Height 5 foot 6 inches. Favourite S Club storyline. I'm quite game for anything. S Club storyline? Sounds like a porno site, doesn't it? I'm quite game for anything. My favourite S Club storyline. I mean for anything. My favourite S Club storyline...

I mean, everybody has a favourite S Club storyline. Oh, absolutely everyone. So, Lewis, what's your favourite S Club storyline? My favourite S Club storyline was the time... The time the washing machine broke down and the plumber had to come out.

Did you ever actually watch that programme for like a small second? Of course not. No. What do you think I am? They were very

awesome storylines. I will have you know. So, I mean, what is it? They they have to go and perform at a gig

but the club They get teleported back in time to a grease-like period and they have to go and perform at a gig, but the club they're playing at is in trouble. They get teleported back in time to a Greece-like period. And they have to car race. And then there's a customary song at the end. Car race in ancient Greece? How does that work? No, in the film Greece. Right, um... Hang on a minute.

Don't Wikipedia it! Don't Wikipedia it Don't Wikipedia it I need to check something I'm quite game for anything So I quite like doing things That are different or wacky Stuff like dressing up as an alien Or kissing a stranger

Or anal Oh god Do you remember those pictures you found of her In the nip You know the fake ones Oh god Fake nude Tina Barrett pictures When was that

You found them though That was last time we were talking about her No that was ages ago. You know, because we often talk about Tina. Oh, God, there is something wrong with us. It's kind of funny, though, you know, talking a lot about someone who isn't famous at all and hasn't actually been even remotely famous for quite a few years. and hasn't actually been even remotely famous for quite a few years.

You're listening to The Yolk Pod. But there was a particularly long one, which I think was for Comic Relief, in which they all went back in time to the 60s or something and had to have a car race in order to pay to fix their time machine or something. They had to pay to get their time machine fixed. Yes, they had to win the money in the car race. They went into a fucking garage and this engineer had his flat cap on

and he went, and this engineer had his sort of flat cap on and he went yeah it's going to cost a lot I have to order the parts in where's he ordering parts in for a time machine

well that's what they do isn't it they go oh yeah I don't have any in I'm going to have to order them special so I mean what parts what like a flux capacitor I knew you were going to say that I knew you were going to say that. I knew you were going to say flux capacitor. As if that was the only part of a time machine. Well, it's the most important part.

You don't know anything about time machines, do you? No, you, it's not. It's quite crucial. The reverse sprocket joint is the most important part. No, that's just the thing that fuses the flux capacitor to the warbling flange. What about the tachyon analyser? Now, you're taking a piss now.

Because that's not a real part of a time machine. That's just something from Star Trek. No. You've just given up T88 sound technical about anything. T88... erm... laser... printer. Laser printer! An important part of any time machine, the laser printer.

Laser printers were invented by women. Why didn't the laser printer print out in pink then, if it's invented by a woman? It can! The colour laser printer can print out in pink then if it's invented by a woman can the color laser printer can pick up print out in pink a color laser printer what yes what the hell what are you talking about do people also fly around in your bizarre your bizarro world where there's color printers colour printers. Colour printers! Jesus. Okay guys, this is a partial list of many ingenious inventions by women. Alphabet blocks, chocolate chip cookies, circular saw, dishwasher, disposable diaper, electric hot water heater. Did women... This is extremely sexist.

They invented the tampon. Did women also invent not learning to shut the fuck up? I must say, all these inventions are either, like, they're quite domestic, really, or safety involved. Was the washing machine and, like, the dishwasher invented by a woman? The microwave oven. And the dishwasher. Invented by a woman. The microwave oven. Fire escape has ironing board.

Oh my god. Ironing board. Ironing board. The ironing board. Mmm. Your pod you are listening to. You have just been sent a personal message by Tadpole on the Yoggles with Forums. What you're listening to. You have just been sent a personal message by Tadpole on the Yoggansquad forums.

The message they sent you was, Hello, I have been watching Yog's cast for months now and want to be your friend. This is how... Oh my god. That's just the introduction. Okay, that's not funny. Unfortunately, there is not a train that goes directly to my vagina. What? It's a woman.

It's a lady. Apparently. If I sent this twice... This is the weirdest sentence. If I sent this twice, I apologise. I had to pee and lost track of what I was doing smiley face LOL that is so weird

I've watched your videos on YouTube and I want to be your friend that's pretty odd just the final sentence I mean there's only three sentences here I don't know why she felt the need to like use the third sense. The thing is, it's a really short message, and she had to pee in the middle of it.

I know! How long did you spend, like, preparing this message? How do, like, you know, famous people deal with just random weirdos contacting them? I love people contacting me. We should, like, make it part of the show. Have one of these every week. Contact me. Post on Tina it part of the show. Have one of these every week. Contact me. Post on Tina Barrett's MySpace. That is odd though, isn't it?

I want to be your friend. I had to go pee. Maybe she got so excited typing up a message to you in the anticipation of you replying that she had to go urinate. And while she was urinating she forgot whether she'd pressed send or not. You need to reply to her in kind in the forum message.

Hello. What should I say? I don't know what to say. God... It's a chain! You should, whatever you type, right, in the reply, at the end, say, Sorry, I'm not sure if I sent this to you or not, I had to go take a shit halfway through. Oh, God. Tune in for more crap next week. Please post on Tina Barrett's MySpace.

Thank you.