Trillbilly Worker's Party - Episode 190: Hello Boulder
Episode Date: March 17, 2021This week we're getting the goods, then hearing the latest from JD Vance and Peter Thiel, then hearing some more about how cops are the biggest babies in the world, and finally taking a trip to the pr...istine city of Boulder, Colorado Support us on Patreon: www.patreon.com/trillbillyworkersparty
Transcript
Discussion (0)
You have it say radar?
Nah.
I thought they would send me like a, what is it?
The Amber Alert or some shit.
Or the emergency notification or some shit.
Amber is one of the...
There's missing child.
Yeah.
Yeah, Amber is if there's a kid missing.
Shit.
Tornado coming through in a Honda Civic.
Shit.
God damn. Yes. God damn.
Okay.
I had a memory
sort of pop into my head the other day
of when I was 16
and I came into my bedroom
and on the table in my bedroom
there was a shoebox.
And I knew what was in the shoebox.
And my heart sank immediately.
So I sat down at the shoebox, and my dad walked in.
And he said, he said, you care to explain this?
It was your shoebox.
It was my shoebox.
It had been unearthed.
It was. In the shoebox was some rolling papers,
a lighter,
and some Visine.
And...
No weed, though.
No weed.
No weed.
No, you smoked the weed.
You smoked the weed.
And I remember my dad saying,
do you care to explain this?
And I said,
well, you see, me and my friends, we were lighting some fireworks and the smoke got in our eyes and we needed some Visine because it made our eyes irritated.
And we were putting the black hats in rolling papers.
When you're young, you don't realize that you're just dead to rights at that point.
You think like you
can still maneuver your way out of that shit like you can begiver that's funny it was in a shoebox
my mom filled my weed in a vera bradley purse i kept it in this vera bradley like
fucking quilted purse some aunt gave me and it smelled so bad i i kept my weed in my bass drum i remember that of my drum
kit but i never kept the well that's smart yeah but i never kept the uh i just like i just think
it's such a funny genre like excuses you gave your parents that they saw through like they clearly
saw through because i remember telling that to my dad my dad looking at me like are you serious right now like he can't believe that you would think that he would believe that
shit was true exactly she thought it was gold like you thought she were maneuvering absolutely
what does he say though mama would say some shit like do you want to try that again
like another excuse like let's let's let's do that again let's try let's re-rule
yeah my buddy brandon young had the best he uh remember when sable would come out and wwf with
the with the body paint on her titties yeah he said she came out one night he said and i was
beating the devil out of it while she was out there he said about that time my mom had some
gas in but they were in there
in the other room. He said, and I would have swore to
God that I locked my door.
About that time, I hear my mom
open the door and say, come out and say hi to your aunt.
He said, and I looked up. He said, I looked up
my mom, and I was full staff, and he said,
I didn't know what to do, so I just
played dead, like I was asleep.
Even though he made eye contact.
He went full possum.
Yeah, he's pulling an old possum routine.
He's just sitting there hard as a rock, beating the devil out of it.
And his mom walks in.
He just plays dead.
I don't know what I would do.
I guess I would do the same thing.
Yeah, rigor mortisy's, man.
Yeah.
It is funny to think about as a youth, you think you're like, nah, they probably didn't know.
But now that I'm older, I'm like, oh, God, they knew everything.
Man, I couldn't even lie to my mom.
My mom knew every time i tried she knew my mom used to tell me i stink because after i like because i smelled like pot and i always was
like do you really not know what pot smells like she's like you stink i'd be like oh
i used to tell her my friend's dad smoked cigars in the house. That's what I would tell her.
That's much better than saying you were lighting fireworks with your friends
and it irritated your eyes.
The smoke got in your eyes.
Are you serious right now?
I would, whenever my friend Diana's parents would go out of town,
and shout out to Junior T.doll if he's listening here i know he listens sometimes but we would go up there right diana's parents liquor cabinet
and i came home drunk as a dog one night and i'd walked home and i don't remember much of this, but my mom, I just remember waking up face down on the couch,
and my mom said, I know when you've been drinking.
And she said, because whenever you come in, you've been drinking, you go straight to bed.
But whenever you come in and you've not been drinking, you go straight to the refrigerator and get you a snack.
Well, one night I came home from Diana Diana's and I was dog-ass drunk.
I said, you know what?
I remember that.
I said, I'm going to throw a little curveball tonight.
I walked in there drunk as hell.
Went to the refrigerator and dropped a whole goddamn gallon of milk
and busted it all over the kitchen floor.
I looked at her and she looked at me, and I just went to the couch and fell asleep face down.
She didn't say nothing to me.
She just cleaned it up, and I felt so bad.
I just dropped that goddamn milk and just went like that.
It exploded. It just exploded.
You know what I'm saying?
It's just like a big mess and I didn't say anything else.
I just went and passed out face down
on the couch.
Oh, darn it.
God damn.
I definitely thought that
shoebox story was going somewhere else.
I figured it was full of porn.
Yeah, I figured it was
full of playboys that's what i thought but tom took it there it was fine i've learned this and
kids probably with internet porn probably just don't have like you know like pages to where i
have a playboy stuck under their mattress anymore but i bet usually parents are good sports about
that you know what i mean because that's an awkward conversation to have over such a minor
offense you know what i mean like i don's an awkward conversation to have over such a minor offense.
You know what I mean?
Like, I don't want to have that conversation anymore
or anything else.
But drugs, I feel like you probably have to address,
maybe, a little bit.
Nah, man.
Go ahead, Tanya.
Go ahead.
No, you go.
You go ahead.
Nah, you just remind me.
When I was a younger man,
and, you know, I used to have, like,
the pay-per-view, like, Playboy channels and Spice
and all of that shit, man. Oh, yeah.
I ordered that shit. My parents
were, like, using their account, because I didn't pay bills,
man. I was, like, 12. And, like,
I went to, like, hey, you know, you gotta go to channel
974 or some shit
like that. And I went
and was buying, like, these movies, because they were, like,
$3.99. I get to see some movie
titties. Like, this is a good deal.
You know? The bill came in. some soft core yeah yeah except not that was when it was leave you had to pay to get the hardcore man you know that wasn't the after hbo after hours type shit and
like okay the bill came in and my mother looked at that shit the first place she went to was my
father but my father like you know he wasn't worried that shit man but luckily she said him instead of covering herself because he just sat me down
and like talked to me was this you i was like yeah he's like it's all right i'm gonna take care of it
and he ended up calling the cable service explaining that was his son that they could
cancel they were like nah man you can't cancel that shit you paid for it he watched it right he watched it and then and then he's ready to beat you to the last
they were like that's a nice story and all but sorry you gotta pay for it yeah my dad tried to
do what i tried to do right i love this premise to the tv company what you tried to do to him
so then your mom called it was like see see, my husband watched these. And they were like, you gotta be still.
It was just saving ass like three times around, you know.
My dad had to save himself, tried to save me, and ended up, you know, having to throw me under the bus.
It's all right.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Drake TV.
My husband, he's a decrepit son of a bitch.
We didn't order these, though.
I get this question a lot in sex ed where parents are like what do i
do my like 12 year old is looking at all this crazy shit on the family computer like i don't
want to i don't want to shame him but he can't be pulling this shit on the family computer
la la la i'm like get on their own tablet yeah that's all i know to tell you man they know
you can't swim upstream your whole life just give in know to tell you man they know you can't swim upstream
your whole life just give in just like what are you gonna do you can't stop kids from watching
porn fuck there's just no you should have been it should have natural can't stop the rain
i was like knock on the door and get them their own tablets all i know to tell you i go i go fuck
with that coax until uh real sex would come in legibly.
Yeah.
I'd go to town on it.
Showtime.
The lines.
I just got my first glass dildo.
It's like a literal scepter.
It's gorgeous.
And I have this very vivid memory of watching through the lines on Showtime.
It might have been a real sex episode where they did like a behind the scenes scenes on glass dildos and they showed how they made glass dildos and i remember being like
wouldn't that kill you i was so young that i was just like horrified at the thought like what if
it broke just like so i just i just have this vivid memory of being horrified at the thought of
toys that is terrifying yeah i know well and as a kid like i didn't know what the fuck was going on
anyway and i was you know only watching it through the half i also have this vivid memory of one of
them uh showing how you make a mold of someone's ass like an asshole mold yeah it was a porn star and they like did this whole clay
thing over her ass um so that so that they could make a fuckable ass like a doll it was like an
exact replica of her ass and i was just like holy shit like that's the kind of shit i was
no wonder i'm a sex educator now just absolute insane yeah imagine
like having to have your asshole smeared with like that plaster whatever and having it sit there for
like an hour while harness she looked like she was having a good time she was just like she was
just like light up on this bed on her she's like getting my ass sculpted the shit we encountered through the lines on showtime that's also how i watch the l word
it's formative explains a lot very um well uh welcome to the show this week for the... This was a wild start, Terrence.
For the week of March 17th.
To get things started this week, I've got a getting the goods.
I have a segment for getting the goods, a little mini one.
Just a little thing to get us...
Just a little lead in the gas tank for...
Or a little noise.
Whatever the correct anecdote here is to get us started um but if
you're not familiar with getting the goods getting the goods is our segment about how direct action
gets the goods um and so i put it up on twitter this week but i didn't really get to dig into it
on twitter so uh i just want to uh just introduce you all to um let you uh eastern
kentucky folk hero michael baker who um was caught stealing gas from a police car and i just wanted
to read the article because it's a really goddamn funny article um so there it is facebook photo
leads to arrest for stealing gas from police car.
There it was on Facebook for all to see.
Michael Baker with a gas can, a siphon hose stuck into a police cruiser in eastern Kentucky,
and a middle finger raised.
Hell yeah.
Among those who saw it were Jenkins police, who arrested a 20-year-old Baker on Monday and charged him with theft by unlawful taking.
Baker told W.Y.M.T. TV and Hazard there wasn't much fuel in the car to siphon and the stunt on Friday was intended as a joke.
Baker's girlfriend took the photo and posted it. But police didn't laugh.
but police didn't laugh chief alan borms borms says that if baker would steal from police he'd steal from anybody that's not true not necessarily let's see things are not mutually exclusive
yeah the man seems awfully moral to me oh yeah and then the authorities say they plan to buy
lockable gas caps the thing about this that multiple people pointed out.
The thing about this that multiple people pointed out as I posted it was that was this man's gas.
This is taxpayer money, baby.
He was taking back his surplus.
Exactly.
This man stole his own gas.
I just hope that he drove to his drug dealer with that gas.
I hope he went and got some weed.
Exactly.
I got a funny story about Michael Baker.
When he was little, we used to go to church with him.
He was part of the Baker Sandlin crew from Perk Creek.
They called him Pig when he was little.
That was his nickname, Pig.
And alternatively, they'd call him Amos.
That was his middle name, Amos, A-M-O-S, Amos.
And that's why I said March 16th shall heretofore be known as Michael Amos Pig Baker Day from here on out.
When he was little, him and Ty's little brother, Sidney, would come to the pool all the time.
And Sidney liked to do a little direct action of his own by doing something called the kiss my black ass dive.
I like the sound of that.
And what he would do is he'd catch us up in the lifeguard chair.
He was probably eight years old.
And he'd jump off and he'd dive and he'd pull his pants down.
And he'd say, kiss my black ass.
And he'd just dive into'd pull his pants down and he'd say, kiss my black ass and take us out of here.
Hell yeah.
Well, Pig was a little younger than Sidney,
but they would, you know, they'd kind of gag up sometimes.
And I don't know if you've seen the picture,
but Michael Pig, Amos Baker, is decidedly not black.
He's blonde.
Wears that Celtics hat cocked to the side.
But him and Sidney, I was up on the lifeguard stand one time and they were at the end of the diving board and i like heard them kind of whispering
to themselves you know what i mean like i knew some mischief was afoot they were both on the
same diving board yeah they ran off together and one went one way and they both pulled their pants down and said kiss my black ass
it's real solidarity
15 minutes because of that and i and now i apologize i wasn't being an ally that day
it's been a cop cop if they're taking you they're taking us both
an injury to one's an injury at all well that is absolutely worth 15 minutes out of the pool
if they knew that's all they were gonna get why not keep going well yeah and a twist of fate sid became a cop and mike chose the outlaw lifestyle
he stayed true to it so oh man was that sid's cop car he took the gas out of him
so there you have it oh shit well i thought that was a good installation, a second installation to the segment. The first installation was about animal rights activists in England digging up a old woman to get the goods.
And you know what?
You got to do what you got to do, whether it's siphoning gas from a cop car or digging up an 82-year-old's remains to get lab testing on animals ended.
You got to do what you got to do. It's not an easy job, but, you know, somebody's got to do lab testing on animals uh ended you gotta do what you gotta do it's not an
easy job but you know somebody's gotta do it it's really not i mean digging up a dead body is pretty
rough but have you ever siphoned gas it ain't no picnic neither you got a narrow window to work
with too i worked with this guy spraying weeds in the oil field and he was like 80 years old they smoked
like three packs of cigarettes just in the time that i was with him from like 5 a.m to 5 p.m
you imagine what your lungs look like after you've sprayed chemicals for decades and smoked three
packs of that what love i would come home because they put dye in that stuff in the in and so so
that you can tell where they sprayed it.
And so I would come home just covered in green.
I would come home just green.
It's untelling what's in your fucking system.
Yeah.
But I would watch that dude sucking gas one time
and then light a cigarette right afterwards.
Oh my God.
What?
He's trying to blow his fucking face off.
He probably had gas in his mouth.
I was like, this shit rocks. in his mouth. I was like, this is gross.
The best guys,
like the best guys,
the guys who sit
at the gas station
that got about
a three quarter smoked camel
dangling out of their lips
while they're pumping
some unleaded.
They don't give a damn.
Jesus Christ.
I rode up to my house
one time
and on my front porch,
I'd been gone a week.
I had no idea
there was something
at my house.
One of my,
a friend of a friend
was on my front porch with a blowtorch making dabs or whatever with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. I'd been gone a week. I had no idea there was something at my house. A friend of a friend was on my front porch with a blowtorch
making dabs or whatever with a cigarette
hanging out of his mouth. I said, man,
you're about to blow my fucking house up.
Dude, who the fuck are you?
What the fuck are you doing? About that time
the guy I actually knew come out of the house. He's like,
well, man, so we was just hanging out up
here. Listen,
as a habitual smoker,
just cause harm to yourself nobody else around
you right no homes right they used all my kitchen pots this is fucking crazy people um well so um
here's someone who's never siphoned gas in their life uh i would be willing to bet. J.D. Vance.
J.D. Vance is back in the news
this week. His little broke ass
should have when he ran out of gas trying to get
to his interview at Yale in that movie.
Yeah, he should have.
They should have applied some of that Jackson
wisdom to his situation. I thought we banned
him from the pod.
He's wormed his way back in the news,
Tonya. I thought this was a good
news hook because it concerns more than just jd vance i thought it was kind of an interesting
um story so the story is that peter till um the uh hedge fund uh vampire um like just such a
literally i'm gonna'm going to say something
before you go any further.
I've did my fair share of Peter
Till hate, mostly because of his
involvement in the Bobby Schmurder case.
Welcome
home, Bobby.
But the other thing is
he might be on to
something with his kid's blood thing. The man looks great.
He does. He's very handsome.
I won't say that. He's a ghoul, but he's extremely
handsome. Fresh blood.
Well, he is also
and I know this is a stereotype, but it is
true. He is also a gay man.
And I feel like most gay men I know
over the age of 40 still look pretty good.
Drink children's blood. Okay, Terrence.
It's a horrible stereotype.
Frankly offensive. still look pretty good drink children's blood okay frankly offensive oh wait he's 53 god damn he looks good shit he's using for real skincare line the children's blood man um so he donated $10 million to a super PAC established to back J.D. Vance for the Senate race in Ohio that is soon to be vacated by Republican Rob Portman.
This $10 million appears to be the largest contribution ever made to a super PAC backing a single candidate for the Senate.
super pack backing a single candidate for the senate um i guess in the past donations of this size have been given to super packs backing multiple candidates but this is the first
time it's been given this much for one single candidate who actually hasn't even declared he's
running it i have a question i mean he actually anytime we talk about this level this amount of
money i just can't even conceptualize it.
I just disassociate immediately, basically.
But my actual question is that there are supposedly really strict laws about super PACs working with candidates.
And all these laws prohibit it.
Like, they can't communicate at all, the super PAC and the candidate.
Has anyone went down for that?
Tanya, I want to say something.
The alley has changed since you got out
organizing.
The laws of engagement
are not what they were in 2012
when you sent me to
power shift as a delegate.
Me having to
chase Russell
all over goddamn Pittsburgh.
I'll never forget your face, FaceTime when y'all told you
I wasn't going.
I said, what?
Yeah, you crazy.
No, really?
Is that not the law anymore?
Just nothing matters is what I'm saying.
That's what I'm saying.
That's what I'm saying. Nothing matters.
They've actually never...
This is actually a totally useless law.
They've never.
Because obviously Peter Thiel is communicating directly with J.D. Vance.
Because then everybody would be complicit.
Because they're all doing the same shit.
They'd have to go after everybody.
Right.
Rico.
We're going to use Rico to get Peter Thiel's pretty ass in jail.
I thought.
Then my question, though, is can we just...
It feels like...
Just never mind.
It's just like we could...
If they're breaking the law,
could we just confiscate
$10 million?
Do whatever.
Toss Peter into a river
and then we have $10 million to pay.
Let Bobby do the Schmurder dance all over the pretty carpet.
That's what I'm on.
I don't give a damn about nothing else.
I just want Bobby to exact revenge on Peter, too.
I thought the name of the Super Pack was pretty fucking funny.
The name of the Super Pack is Protect Ohio Values.
What are Ohio Values?
Like driving recklessly and very fast.
Listen, I ain't saying there's anything wrong with being a gay man that harvests children's blood,
but I wouldn't call that archetype in line with what he's deeming Ohio values here.
I don't know many Ohioans that are like...
Giving you a hard time for raising your air conditioning bill for $6 over what it normally is?
That's an Ohio value.
That's an Ohio value.
Yeah.
But I was wondering, do you think J. jd will get the trump endorsement do you think he's
gonna get the trump endorsement oh yeah i can see it is that what trump's doing now
he's just endorsing candidates yeah it sounds like he's just doing loser shit
he's just just remember when you go get your shot i was the one that made it happen even
though i spent three years telling you why you shouldn't get it i almost sent you all that press
release and said this is fake right he did this isn't real it was real we talked about it on the
show sunday real as hell i think i think he would endorse j. I mean, like even though he hasn't announced that he's running, but doesn't J.D.
Vance kind of embody like Trump's whole like middle America, the silent majority, like, you know what I mean?
The disaffected, like white male, like kind of thing.
Like it seems like he fits, but he's not as he doesn't seem to be as absurd and comedic as trump is in like an evil cartoon villain way you
know what i mean i don't know if he could do the rallying that trump did you know he's so
unlocked yeah he's he's bloodless he's completely uncharismatic um i don't did he support trump
he was the trump whisperer that's a different thing that That's like that Senate parliamentarian that nobody knew existed.
J.D. Vance is the Trump whisperer.
There can be only one per term, and he was the one.
That's why it is so sad, fundamentally sad,
that $10 million is just getting flushed down the tubes,
because he won't win. There's no universe
in which J.D. Vance wins a Senate race.
Well,
what I love is we knew this was coming when he
moved back to Ohio.
And remember him
talking about how he just wanted to move back to
small town America, to Columbus, Ohio?
Biggest city.
One of the biggest cities in the Midwest.
In a state with several big cities.
Yeah, like, who are you kidding here, buddy?
You can get a direct flight to wherever the hell it was you used to live.
And now he's running, I'm sure this Ohio Valley's bullshit is going to be some rural people's blah, blah, blah.
I just, thinking of Ohio Valley, i can just picture brian quinn be
sitting in a driver's seat going sucking an old guy off
god oh man um yo wait it's a it's a matthew m McConaughey running for governor of Texas, too?
Like, it seems like.
Shit, really?
That's what he said, man.
Just post-Trump.
Like, everybody's just like, you know what I'm saying?
You know what?
This seems like a good idea.
Like, I should have political power.
Because if this guy did it, and I agree with him, maybe I could do it, too.
Well, they're not wrong.
They're not wrong at all.
Why wouldn't they?
Well, they're not wrong.
Why wouldn't they run?
Why wouldn't any dumbass with 10 mil in the bank be like hell i guess i could be president or governor
it's a new vanity project you know what i'm saying instead of like starting like a non-profit or like
you know like adopting african children you just run for governor or senator of your state man
who was the first who started this trend was Was it Schwarzenegger? Shit.
Maybe Reagan, man.
Reagan.
Oh, yeah.
I guess it was Reagan.
Yeah, the OG.
OG.
Did he, like, start Westerns or something?
Trump?
Wasn't Clint Eastwood, like, some sort of mayor of a town?
I think he was the mayor of Liverpool, California, right?
Who the fuck is that?
Yeah, I thought that was in New York.
No, that was in UK.
UK.
I think
Livermore or something. He was
president. He was the mayor
of some town in California. So there's precedence
for this.
My question is, Terrence, can Matthew
McConaughey win the governorship
of Texas?
As our Texas correspondent.
What's that you?
I'm going to say no. I don't think he could.
Follow up question.
Could he beat Ted
Cruz?
Could he win the seat Beto shit the bed
for?
You know, I don't think so.
I mean, I could be wrong,
but I...
You don't think if he made an actual run
and you saw people saw Matthew
McConaughey and Ted Cruz
side by side
that they wouldn't be like, yeah, fuck that guy?
That's a fair point.
Did you see the most recent Ted Cruz drag putting his face side by side with the grandpa from the original Munsters?
Oh, God, it's so funny.
It looks just like that.
See, I think that's cold-blooded.
I think that's cold-blooded.
Grandpa Al was a vowed socialist to his death.
He was one of us.
He doesn't deserve to be maligned like that.
No, you're right.
Nobody does for that matter.
Well, I was just going to say, let us not leave out Brother Kane,
who went from the WWE to the elected
mayor of Knox County,
Tennessee.
Dwight and The Rock Johnson always gets thrown around
as somebody that would run.
You guys
are forgetting
the OG, Jesse Ventura.
Oh, shit.
Yeah.
Okay. Well, shit. Yeah. Okay.
Well, anyways.
Let's move on to the next topic.
I'm gonna have to go get a
glass of water, but y'all go ahead with that.
I'll be right back.
Alright. I actually
saved this topic just for Tanya,
but she's
like...
I need water water i need hydration
all right so this next this next topic is um what i wanted to talk about on sunday
but we didn't get to it because we spent an entire hour talking about the stimulus package
probably for the third weekend for the third weekend. For the third consecutive week.
Slow news cycle, boys.
Yeah, man.
So this one is relevant to our home state of Kentucky.
Going on right in our backyard.
It's pretty fucked up, but there's funny elements to it.
So this past
week the kentucky senate voted to criminalize insulting the police in a way that would cause
quote-unquote violent response jesus christ um it was passed on the literal day before the
anniversary of brianna taylor's, which means they're just like
doing an end zone
dance. Dancing,
throwing around Gatorade, dousing themselves in it.
Yeah. The bill
would make it a misdemeanor to taunt
or challenge an officer with words
or gestures, quote, that would have
a direct tendency to provoke a violent
response from the perspective
of a reasonable and prudent person.
That's just like saying let's criminalize wearing sexy attire to the club.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
This is literally, this is like the definition of porn.
Right.
You know, like we'll just know it when we see it.
Also, like assuming that any officer is reasonable or prudent, like, that's a very odd part.
It's a far stretch.
Very big stretch.
Sorry you're a fucking cop anyway.
Well, what about the plainclothes cops?
They've got parole in the bars now.
How do you know?
This is in Kentucky, Terrence, you know um this so this is in kentucky tarrant you said yeah this is in kentucky um state senator danny carroll republican who sponsored the bill said it
would enable officers to arrest someone inflaming them before the encounter turns violent the
provision is meant to apply the the provision is meant to apply to comments that are, quote,
I love the tacit admission that cops are sociopaths that have no impulse control.
Yes. They have no self-control it's like
baked into this like the ordinance this is this is what they do instead of more trainings because
the trainings aren't working exactly it's like well i guess we're gonna have to criminalize
everyone else further tom you're exactly right this is this is quite literally a bill acknowledging that cops are sociopaths.
Violent sociopathic assholes who have no impulse control and therefore we have to work around them.
This is what it says.
It says, Danny Carroll said you don't have a right to accost a police officer.
Well, no, I'm pretty sure I do.
They're a person just like anyone else.
I'm going to get my taxpayer. I'm going to get my taxpayer.
I'm going to bake my taxpayer dollars right back out of them.
Yeah, I'm getting the gas out of that goddamn gas tank.
Cuff and stuff me.
Man, this is like putting a baby in a room that's just not a safe environment for it to be in.
Sharp corners, you know, drops.
And then just trying to baby-proof it instead of taking the baby out of the
fucking room in the first place and putting it somewhere else,
man. You're just building something around
them to accommodate their sociopathy.
Yep, you're exactly right.
Come on,
help us. Did it pass? I need some names
who supported this shit.
Yeah, was this, did this pass or this was just
introduced? It was passed.
It'll never stand.
I mean, there's no way in hell that's constitutional, but still.
Saying a lot that we have at least 26 adults that voted for this.
Yeah, it passed.
I can't remember the exact number, but it passed like 26 to 11 or something like that.
How many, are you following the legislative session terrence
no are you prepared to take questions because i have a few
because every i mean most of the time they're barely able to pass anything
if they pass five new law if they if they get five things completely through
till the end into law in one legislative
session it's a miracle and it's always amazing to me that the ones that do make it out are the most
just insane absolute bananas bizarrio nonsensical shit yeah and i recently saw on the timeline that
i haven't looked in further but k but Kentucky has passed something that would literally limit Kentucky and stimulus money.
Do you know anything about this, Terrence?
No, I didn't.
I didn't hear this.
No.
Well, I don't know either.
I don't know anything else.
That is absurd.
Absolutely absurd.
I'm getting my goddamn stimulus.
I don't care whose gas tank I have to siphon i'm getting
that god i know i'm checking every day i ain't checked today i'm about to go check right now
what did y'all say every time i check mine it says no information that's what mine says too
and i did oh wait where do you oh i was checking my bank what do you mean where are you going to
check the website yeah yeah oh god i'm staring clear there um
so i had that same reaction i was like do i really want to put my social security number
in the irs.gov no sure don't i sure do not another thing this bill does it's just incredible another
thing this bill does is it seeks to counter the defund the police
movement by requiring that local governments quote,
maintain and approve funding to their law enforcement agencies.
It literally requires them to give more money to their.
Georgia did the same thing actually.
Incredible.
So it's like our already bloated,
Incredible.
So it's like our already bloated, overfunded, sociopathic paramilitary arm needs more money and less consequences.
That's what's going to turn the tide here.
Yes.
Yeah, that's...
Yeah, man, that's all targeted, man.
It's like the whole sort of disgusting, mean-spiritedness of all that.
It's like i was watching the
news earlier it was talking about the the uh murders in atlanta the guy that shot up the
the massage parlors and like the cops are on fox fox five out of atlanta saying oh this was not
racially motivated you know you know what i mean it's like yeah and what
even if they think that why would they fucking say that it's been it's been hours but but it's
like also the people that have denied the existence of racism are are not should not be the arbiters
of what is not a hate right you know what i mean man i just I just think that, like, I mean, I said it earlier, man, but it's like saying that just because this dude says that it wasn't racially motivated and, you know, people will be like, well, we didn't see a manifesto or anything like that, right?
It's just like, dude, like, we live in a racial capitalistic society.
Like, it doesn't have to be him espousing these views
it's the condition under which we live
of course it's fucking racially
motivated you know what I mean
the constitution of the United States
is a manifesto
essentially is a fucking white
supremacist manifesto what do you mean there's no
manifesto
that's the fucking craziest shit I've ever
heard these laws all our laws no manifest. That's the fucking craziest shit I've ever heard.
These laws, all our laws,
literal manifestos.
God damn.
It's funny because people do think,
they do think like our laws are just like these immutable
things written on stone pillars handed down
by God from Mount Olympus
or whatever Mount God lives on these days to, like, our, like, elected officials.
And these are just, like, you know, gospel.
But it's really, like, they're, like, calculated series of, like, political decisions
designed to put the thumb on the scale for the ruling class to criminalize certain classes
and to, like, let other classes skate.
And yeah,
I don't know.
It's just,
we need to constantly be ringing that bell,
I think.
Yeah.
And then just throwing more,
you know,
back to like,
you know,
you know,
making it necessary for,
I guess,
districts like places,
cities,
whatever,
to fund police.
And also just like,
you know,
protecting police because
we all know they're sociopathic you know what i mean so put this law in place right to like
buffer them and save them you know so well you know you you offended the police officer and
that's why you got your ass beat it just blows my fucking mind that we really do live in a society
where like everyone is scared of the cops and like we use our money to fund them and we feel like we can't do anything
about it right like that is just so ridiculous like that's like powerlessness to the key man
like just like straight up powerlessness yo you're just giving over all responsibility
like social responsibility obligation and just place it in the hands of these fucking psychopaths man do you think it's a continuation of just
uh police have just become far and away the most powerful like political force in the country like
running away so much so that like all the all the politicians are terrified of them won't touch them
won't do anything they just want to give them more money more training more resources and enable their worst behaviors i just it's yeah
yeah they're honestly like more maniacal and
statistically than the military like that used to be like it's just because it's become this it's a on top of the actual it's like job it's like all cultural this is an all
this is all like cultural theater um yeah of how strong and it's just it really does feel like the
pinnacle of i mean i hate to say but like toxic, like this elevated toxic masculinity.
It's like the worst of the worst that this could possibly get is cops.
It's like a spiral of just violent obsession, just literal obsession with violence and control.
You ever seen the way they are, man?
And I mean, I fucking seen this shit when I went to the rallies of the protests over the summer, man.
Like these motherfuckers are itching to use those riot shields like they're itching to use those batons, man. Like you look at him, it's like I'm looking at like in the eyes of like an animal, like a deer or something like that.
You know what I mean? Just like black people, just like no recognition of any humanity or anything like that.
They get like excited from fucking people up.
It's like Tom said.
I think you put it best, Tom.
This will be in 500 years
when they're digging through the remains.
Whether there's future humans
or there's just alien visitors,
they're digging through the remains
of this fucked up civilization
and they find a bill like that.
They'll be like, oh, I see.
So they couldn't do anything about this problem
so they just tried to make it illegal for you to even look at a cop the wrong way so they wouldn't
blow your fucking head off like oh okay that's how like that's how beholden they were to the
violence and influence of these people yeah yeah good it's also like it's only i I mean, what, I don't know the percents, but like the times that cops are actually reprimanded or fired for something is so, so low.
Oh, yeah.
You know, it's so, so low, and this is going to make it impossible.
Yeah, I would say it's about 0% right now.
It's horrible to get fired as a cop.
Yeah.
Or if you do, you could just go somewhere else you go to another county yeah exactly and now it's like they're not you're right yeah right or god forbid
you go work security at a school or something right right jesus and you know what we have a
strong labor climate to thank for that um let the police unions in the dsa um police are workers baby all right so i have a final thing i
want to read here um i know we don't have a lot of time left but that's okay because this thing
i'm going to read doesn't really have an ending so i'm going to give away the ending before we
read it because i was reading it and i was eating it up. And it was like a delicious meal.
And I was just, I was like, I can't wait to get to the final course.
And the final course never came.
All the first, you know, hors d'oeuvres and everything, all the first courses, they were delectable.
But it doesn't have a payoff.
And the reason why, which is that i realized is that
it's it's an article it was in the washington post it's about three or four thousand words
of a rich family from new york moving to boulder colorado and over the course of the essay i was
like all right this has got to be moving somewhere this is gonna be moving yeah i love it already
but uh but it doesn't ever get anywhere but and i'll and i'll and i'll show you why so this is
in the washington post i moved my family from brooklyn to boulder it was rocky
well we're off to a good start
in the spring of 2020,
my four-year-old son, Finn, sat on
a rock at the Walter or Roberts trailhead,
shoeless and wailing.
Now, I just want to point out, Tribulis
has a strict no-child policy, but
I'm assuming...
I'm assuming these aren't their real names.
Surely no parent
would put their own children's real names
in a story. My little bitch ass youngest
Finn.
So I'm just gonna operate on that
assumption and hope that I'm correct.
Hopefully that this person is not such
a fucking dumbass that they would put their
kids out there like this.
He wailed as a steady
stream of hikers passed by, chatting
beneath their gators and masks. He wailed as a steady stream of hikers passed by chatting beneath their
gators and masks.
He wailed as other small children skipped alongside their parents.
He wailed as I begged,
implored and ultimately threatened him to put on his shoes or else he'd lose
his iPad privileges.
This being Boulder,
Colorado,
a place that remained preternaturally relaxed,
even at the height of a pandemic,
nobody seemed especially judgmental
but i felt terrible these coloradans had come to enjoy the flat irons those majestic stone waves
frozen mid-crest against the sky instead they found a couple of new yorkers throwing a tantrum
finn was refusing to put on his hiking sandals shoes that most of the population
including children wear like second skin the sandals had good treads
this is you're right tom this is literally this woman insulting her child in a national publication
calling him a bitch um the sandals had good treads, were breathable, and dried quickly when wet.
In short, perfect for a town where you could rock climb, mountain bike, and tube a river in a single afternoon.
Finn, however, wore cheap Target sneakers, rubbed slick.
Why, I moaned to myself, couldn't he be just like a boulder kid?
But I knew the answer.
This wasn't his home.
He was a Brooklynite, a boy who had been abruptly
taken west at the onset of the pandemic before we got here finn had never been on a hike
i like i that that sentence is so fucked up i moaned to myself couldn't he be why couldn't
he be just like a Boulder kid?
Like, he refused to wear his slick sandals and only wears the Target sneakers.
First of all, she feels like.
Here's the thing about it.
Like, knowing what I know about Boulder, this is not really a learning curve.
Like, Boulder's basically like Brooklyn with mountains.
Yeah, what was the shit, like like people were losing their minds about like
a couple weeks ago man while back the dad with the soup the can of soup where he was like basically
i mean i don't really i don't really yeah i don't really want to make like cast a spurs on the guy
like maybe maybe he's just like i don't want to cast any spurs of child abuse but this just feels
like this person is just like beating up on their child yo it's like your fucking kid that you raised
like why are you shitting on your kid like this man yeah that yeah like you had this says more
about you than you're willing to admit yeah really before we got here finn had never been on a hike
aside from the three flights of stairs required to reach our apartment, his existence was primarily horizontal. We'd gotten him
on the trail only by promising videos
and ice cream. Now I hoped
our boulder sojourn might motivate him
to try some new adventures, appreciate
a different kind of childhood.
Instead, he'd become a grouch, hunkering
down in the safety of his proverbial
Brooklyn trash can.
Our friends back home were trapped in their
apartments, their daily soundtrack filled
with sirens sure boulder playgrounds were shuttered all spring just as they were in brooklyn
but it didn't matter because we had seemingly infinite space plains to the east mountains to
the west big sky overhead in other words an ideal place to ride out of quarantine it was an
opportunity for us to test drive a new kind of existence even be a
different kind of family but not if we but not if we refuse to do things the bolder way
um our family of four here we get into it here 14 months my husband jason and i were among the
roughly 4200 000 new yorkers who left town when the pandemic struck we lived in a how many 4200
000 out of a city of eight million that's that's pretty crazy i didn't know that but it's pretty
crazy um but this is this is it we lived in a 1 000 square foot apartment in the northern end
of park slope brooklyn relatively spacious digs by new york standards like that's that's a huge
i mean like that's a huge apartment for for likeope. I mean, they probably pay like $80,000 a month.
Not really, but it's probably incredibly exorbitant.
Then in mid-March, we learned that schools were shutting down.
Jason and I were incredibly fortunate to keep our jobs,
which meant we'd both be working from home
while running virtual school and caring for our
baby the apartment had four rooms it was going to be terrible caring for fans pussy ass yeah
i wasn't about to spend a pandemic in a four-room apartment with my bitch-ass son
i feel like that's not that bad. Like, a thousand square feet, four rooms.
Like, these people just couldn't handle it.
This is a park slope, right?
Park slope, yeah.
There's a lot of people that live in far less square footage with far more people.
Man, Park Slope.
I don't know if y'all have been there, but I used to work there.
That place is not a... I don't really understand how you could live unhappily in Park Slope. I don't know if y'all have been there, but I used to work there. That place is not a...
I don't really understand how you could live unhappily in Park Slope.
Right.
You know what I mean?
It's nice.
It's nice.
Very nice.
It's very nice.
Our parents begged us to leave.
Mine live in the D.C. suburbs where coronavirus infections were climbing.
That left Boulder, where my in-laws had moved seven months before.
Colorado seemed much safer.
In less than 24 hours, we threw clothing into a couple of suitcases,
bought plane tickets, and gave the contents of our fridge to a neighbor.
They moved to Boulder in 24 hours.
Like, just on a whim.
On a whim.
Just because someone got the sniffles
like this was in the early pandemic this wasn't even like yeah i know it's like damn they had
the foresight most people were like it'll be a month or two we'll ride it out shit oh man
um boulder is a city of roughly 108 000 people uh 30 miles northwest of denver and on the front
range of the rocky mountains it is pristine with about 50 by that they mean there's no homeless
people or people of color um what about sure it's yeah it's pure as the driven snow. Pristine, if you know what I mean.
They're winking heavily.
If we could only get the University of Colorado to suspend their basketball team, we would finally achieve.
We would finally be at peace.
It is pristine with about 50,000 acres of public open space
And it is wealthy with a median
Household income of about
$103,000
God damn
Pretty wealthy
Half everybody walking around
Makes six figures
That's the median?
That's the median income yes
What the fuck?
The median income here is like $ that's you know what the median
income here is like 22 no no it's lower the median income in letcher county is about 16
it's like 14 to 16 i think oh wow yeah 20 22 would be a come up
um if you remove the open space And significantly homogenize the population
Homogenize the population
Yo
Boulder and gentrified Brooklyn
Have a lot in common
Yo
Yo
What
Cold brew is abundant
I traded Hungry Ghost and Prospect Heights
For Beliza off Alpine Avenue I don't know what any of this
shit is. Independent breweries
abound. Boulder even boasts
a ska-themed brew stillery.
And vegan ice cream is
purple. Stop, stop, stop.
Goth? Did you say goth
themed? Ska. Ska. It's even
worse. Ska. Ska.
You said a
a ska-themed what ska a ska themed brew stillery yo what is that listen
i'm sorry but these are the worst kinds of white people yo like that ass like these are the worst
kinds of white people yo it's so easy to just not be like offensive and racist but just that
comparison between the homogenized like you know
like what boulder and like park slope that's just like what are you actually saying right right
she said yeah i have never heard the word brew stillery i have not either i assume it just means
they distill and brew there i think so yeah, yeah. Oh, so it's a poured in, whatever, the combination is worth it.
What I'm having a hard time with is the ska thing.
I mean, that's certainly another layer, but the whole thing is a mess.
Continue, Terrence.
Pick it up.
Gelato Boy on Pearl Street in lieu of Van Leeuwen.
The boutiques are cute if overpriced.
CBD, the cannabis derivative, is everywhere and in everything.
Kombucha is on tap.
A lot of brands you might associate with Brooklyn are based in Boulder,
like Justin's Nut Butters and Bobo's Snack Bars.
The Whole Foods Market near my in-law.
Who associates those places with Brooklyn?
Who cares about any of this? It's just who this what does this have to do with the article when i think of brooklyn
i definitely think of justin's nut butters no doubt about that i mean have you ever read
have you ever read american psycho yeah i read parts of it i mean i'll see the movie there are
literal pages in American Psycho.
Like, there are segments of American Psycho that are like 10 or 15 straight pages of him just listing products.
Yeah.
And what he's trying to get across here is that these people aren't anything.
They are just an accumulation of various products.
And that's what she's doing.
And if anything, they're sociopathic
because through the banality like you know you find out that these people are like soulless
and don't actually fucking believe in anything right yeah i mean she just keeps going on
whole foods market gotham greens uh various broth tonic i mean like Barry's Broth Tonic. I mean, like... Broth Tonic. Oh, man.
Broth Tonic.
They have not met one person since they moved there.
Both towns are unabashedly progressive.
Brooklyn and Boulder is what she's referring to.
Both are called, quote-unquote, bubbles by residents who are sorry and also not sorry to be sheltered from the quote unquote real
america you see a lot of black lives matter signs though boulderites have actual lawns in which to
stake this claim i found one while walking on a rural stretch of 47th street in north boulder
the view is breathtaking and this is the thing that uh just uh uh really got me.
The view is breathtaking,
fields stretching toward the lush foothills,
scattered tractors and barns.
I felt a flash of surprise,
if only because the other places I'd been to
looked like this place.
Certain parts of West Virginia and rural Maine
often had signs suggesting
a very different political viewpoint.
It reminded me that a swath of rural farmland wasn't itself a political thing.
It was merely land.
We imposed our values and perceptions on it.
Standing before the Black Lives Matter sign, I turned in a full circle, taking in the expanse.
I suddenly understood how lucky and privileged we were to be here.
So basically what she's saying is...
Let's pause here.
We love Black Lives Matter signs.
We do not love black people.
We want those signs, but not any human.
But then the image of her spinning around and taking it in full circle.
Just like soaking this in, man.
Oh, my God.
These people are the fucking worst.
The pristine white people. Yo, these people
should never have kids. The Black Lives Matter signs.
It's also an interesting thing
here because
I'm going to guess, gun
to the head. Let's say
we had a race war
tomorrow. Why not? Let's just
Why not?
Let's just say it.
Hypothetically.
Hypothetically. Hypothetically.
You were to put a gun to the head of one of these hypothetical people with the Black Lives Matter sign in front of your yards and tell them to pick a side.
Whose side do you think they're going to take?
Do you think they're going to take the the actual black lives uh side of which their signs um
advertise or do you think they're going to side with the people who put the confederate flags
signs on their yards that she's that she hates in maine and west virginia i'm i'm gonna uh just go
out on a limb here and say that um there's really substantively no difference, the functional value anyways,
of when a person with an income of $105,000 a year
in a tony, gentrified neighborhood of Boulder, Colorado,
puts a Black Lives Matter,
in this house we believe science and et cetera.
Like, there's really no substance difference between that.
I'm just saying this for hyperbole
because now that i'm saying it out loud i'm not sure if i know listen you're absolutely right yo
i know this for a fact here in atlanta in gentrified neighborhoods in atlanta you'll see
the black lives matter signs or the love is love and shit these are the first fucking people that
will call the cops as soon as a fucking black person steps on their fucking lawn yo right
it's this is not hyperbole it on their fucking lawn, yo. This is not
hyperbole. It is absolutely fucking right.
I know this shit. Not from my personal experience,
but from people that I know. These people
do not believe in that shit at all, man.
They will pick
the other side.
In New Orleans, you have the same
thing. I don't know there's a city
that's been more wrecked by gentrification
than New Orleans, just because of its relative size to other places that have been like crazy
gentrified too but you walk through uptown in new orleans for example and you'll see
uh a volvo with vermont tags on it and you know in a house uh you know one of the the shotgun houses
you know with the you know the you know the new orleans, you know, one of the shotgun houses, you know, with the, you know, the New Orleans style.
They'll have signs in the yard.
They'll say, like, you are welcome here.
Like, you know, Black Lives Matter, all these things.
But then they'll say something about, like, addressing the gun violence.
And it's like, yeah, we are welcome here because we were here.
It's you that's not welcome.
You know what I mean?
Like the audacity of somebody coming into a neighborhood like that,
buying up all that shit, and then saying,
you are welcome here if you speak whatever.
You are welcome.
You know what I mean?
It's like, motherfucker, I don't.
They probably have some kind of, they probably,
I love to imagine them all with like
little confederate flags somewhere buried deep in their house just in case they need to pull it out
little white yeah and like well it's like that what what's the show uh watchman where the guy
dies and they find the full clan outfit in his closet all of them actually have all these clan
suits in their closets what i love so much about
what i love so much about this section is she's quite literally saying let's say you're a rich
wealthy person like me from park slope but you want to get away but you um you don't want to go
to west virginia where those nasty gross hillbillies have got Confederate flags in their yards and stuff.
Well, there's a place that's just like
that. It's even better. In fact, it's
pristine. No one's
poor, in fact.
And it's Boulder, Colorado. And
to top it all off, instead of Confederate flags,
they have Black Lives Matter signs. I mean, it's
just a perfect example of how they create their
own reality. Because they have the money to do
it. But it doesn't mean anything. It's just an empty example of how they create their own reality because they have the money to do it but it doesn't mean anything it's just an empty set of cultural signifiers and virtue
signals that don't mean anything yeah yeah it's uh i mean you see that happen like ashville north
carolina i mean we don't have to you know play the greatest hits of gentrification and and like
sort of yuppie development but like it it kind of strange that if you have enough money,
you can just change your reality and your circumstances and your luck
all in one fell swoop,
while the rest of us are kind of at the mercy of our circumstances.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
If there is a race war tomorrow,
it will be blamed on the WAP performance on the Grammys.
You know what this makes me think too, man?
I think this is an omen for like, because I know they moved because of the pandemic.
But what happens when like there are climate refugees, right?
Especially like in the South, you know, when people in the South, it's going to be getting hotter.
You know, we're going to see more hurricanes and shit.
And people are either going to move like to the West Coast or to the northeast or wherever where it can't i mean i don't fucking know what's
gonna happen then are we gonna get more stories like this from like honestly they're all probably
yeah they're all probably gonna have to move to appalachia and the rockies to a high elevation
and write op-eds about it jesus dude that is going to produce some really funny goddamn content
um just that clash of cultures like these people having to live side by side with.
I don't know.
Well, I mean, there's more here.
I mean, there is literally probably a good 2,000, 2,500 more words in this essay.
And it is dribble it is literally about how her son finn
came to like uh scrabbling on rocks how he came to like like hiking over some rocks and streams
and stuff that's it there's nothing a white child learns to play outside i feel so sorry. Crazy. Insane.
I feel so bad for that kid, man.
I have a serious question about this.
Who thought it wise to sit down and commit this to paper?
And then who thought it wise to say, you know what? I'm going to see if the Washington Post wants to run this.
Is that worth that? And it's a huge write-up it's a it's like a feature story and so it has about a half
dozen photos like they sent a photographer to boulder and took photos of boulder like the
nightlife that kid's little slick ass shoes yes yeah what's funny about all this is i thought like that safari type shit
like everybody had had their feel of it do you know what i'm saying like this isn't even like
safari type shit it's fucking boulder but like i thought that like the other america kind of shit
the other america splaining like i thought that shit like i don't know we've talked about this
on the show it's like god damn i don't want to keep doing this show and we just got to keep talking about the other
america or whatever you know what i mean like it's amazing they're still like a jones for that
dude like i thought we were well past that honestly what they're saying with this one is that
they're saying that there is a slice of the normal correct america right in the middle of colorado that's what
they're saying they're saying that it's the other america is all around us but you don't have to go
to those places if you don't want to you can go to the correct place where there's wealthy people
and it's pristine wink yeah colorado springs yeah you don't want to move to kenston north carolina
but you might want to check out ashville
right exactly that's what they're saying dude we talked to mike davis about this but um that really
has been a project of the last 20 or 30 years this the dude from weinsberg wrote that book about it
the big sort it is quite literally people accumulating in geographic areas. It's exurbs.
It's people accumulating in geographic areas and bringing their views and
prejudices and beliefs with them and creating their own communities because
they have the money to do so.
Yeah.
Well,
if you have the money to do so and you can move that far,
that means that that other America just doesn't exist.
Like,
like you guys were saying,
you can literally like reshape your reality to like your views,
your mores and like raise a family there and it'll be fine yeah yeah it's crazy it's kind of wild mike davis shouted out bill bishop in that episode kind of a curve i was like yeah
that was tight um well anyways i guess before we go i, I want to read, before we move on to this and close out, I want to read this scene that she describes in downtown Boulder of this clash, this clash in political forces.
Oh, God.
The shit I can't handle.
There was plenty to be engaged by in boulder it just looked and sounded different
instead of new york 7 p.m clap for frontline workers boulder rights howled like wolves every
evening at eight i thought it was actual animals until jason explained what was happening that's
her husband um the same was true of the city's political expression before the november elections
three corners on a stretch of 28th street were monopolized every saturday by advocates
on one corner there was a modest showing of biden harris supporters including a handful
of latino first-time voters from the university of colorado opposite from a massive trump pence
bus in a throng of magafolt led by an organizer in an opposite was a massive Trump-Pence bus in a throng of Maga-folk, led by an organizer in an Indian headdress.
On the ground beside him, someone had written,
The working class is intersectional in yellow chalk.
Only in a place like Boulder, with the Trumpers, who ordinarily criticized anything that smacked of wokeness use a word like intersectional.
She's so stupid she doesn't even realize they're doing it as a joke.
She thinks they're earnestly using the word intersectional.
She's like, you don't get to use that word.
Oh my God.
I mean, it's just like I said, it's just more drivel like that uh you know um
so you said it never goes anywhere where how does it end the last paragraph um
she talks about uh walking with her fin her son finn on a dusty trail oh he that's right it ends
by him learning to enjoy playing outside yes um finn read ahead ran ahead of us on a dusty trail oh he that's right it ends by him learning to enjoy playing outside yes um finn
ran ahead of us on a dusty trail jumping on top of and over every rock he could find
we managed to hike for nearly 20 minutes before he announced that he was tired and ready to turn
around jason and i looked at each other 40 minutes total isn't terrible i said right it's not like we
have a choice jason said we headed back the way we'd come.
By the time we neared the parking lot, our toddler had fallen asleep in this carrier,
and Finn was asking for his iPad when he got home.
I thought you were going to say the toddler fell asleep in the car.
He let them in there.
Nearby, someone's kid was throwing a fit.
A bolder kid, not my kid.
Sure, I said to Finn, watch as much
as you want. Jennifer Miller
is the author of four books. Her next
about first generation college students
will be published by Farrar, Strauss, and Giroux.
First generation
college students, okay.
Dude, I'm telling
you, this has got to be at least a 3,000
word thing. I mean,
just fucking know it. this is just pornographic man
but also i gotta say this and this is all i'll say about boulder is there's currently a um a uh
prohibition on moving to boulder if you remember peter's out for bernie there's at least two
members that have sworn never to set foot to the city's limits again until
their decidedly progressive values go the opposite direction
i see there is like an oil and gas industry around there right is that what they're
yeah they all live in loveland which i think is kind of two of them now, but two of them used to.
I see, yeah. I mean, I've been to Boulder.
I mean, I've been to Denver a lot.
I've got a lot of friends that live in Denver.
Denver's, I don't hate Denver.
But Boulder is pretty,
I don't know. It's
where you want to be, I guess, if you're a liberal,
a wealthy liberal
Brooklyn refugee. If you want to be, I guess, if you're a wealthy liberal Brooklyn refugee.
If you love West Virginia but hate West Virginians, Colorado's for you.
That's true.
That's how it goes.
That is literally the message of this.
Everybody wants to be a hillbilly.
Nobody wants the water.
That is so fucking funny, Tanya.
Nobody wants the devil's milkshake.
Oh, alright.
Well, that about sums it up for this week.
Any final words, gang?
Good luck with the storms coming. It's about to be wizard of all shit all over the
south yeah yep not looking forward to that shit again again and again and again it's just like
if you're buying million dollar properties in the swamp lands you're out of your fucking mind
maybe i'll take my stimmy and go to Boulder. What else are they saying about those shootings in Atlanta, Aaron?
You know anything else?
Well, I mean, as far as I know right now,
their authorities have said that it's not racially motivated
because the guy said that he was driven because of his addiction to sex.
So he actually didn't want to go to Atlanta.
He wanted to go, I forget what other, forget what state, or where else in Atlanta, or where else in Georgia he wanted to go to Atlanta. He wanted to go I forget what other, I forget what state
or where else in Atlanta
or where else in Georgia he wanted to go, but he said
that I guess this was the closest
place, which he was coming from like
my thing is he's coming from like kind of up north, man.
So I don't understand how through traffic
like he got here really fucking fast
and was really like, you know,
like obviously. Because all that shit happened
in like an hour and there's like...
It's a pretty good distance between them, right?
Yeah. Yeah, it's 30
miles between the places? Yeah.
It takes you like about an hour and a half
to get from where he was coming from, man, so I don't...
Atlanta's a bitch to drive in anyway.
Yeah, he had to target these
two specific places filled with Asian
women. Yeah. Like, he knew
what the fuck
was going on. It's just a place with, like,
strip clubs and, like, you know,
like, these massage parlors. So, I mean,
I don't know. As far as I know, they're
not, they're saying it's not racially motivated.
So, uh, you know.
Nothing is in America.
Okay.
Do you think that he thinks
that he will get a worse sentencing for a hate crime
than just a regular run of the mill i was pissed off about my about my limp dick maybe maybe i
think also too that the law enforcement they don't want to you know you know how these motherfuckers
roll man they don't want to acknowledge that shit you know yeah it's not like we're ever going to
hear from his old dick the guy who's now locked up
let's talk he's gonna be like no no i didn't say that exactly exactly we're never gonna hear from
his dumb ass you know what they're gonna do too is probably have more cops you know patrolling
that shit i wouldn't be surprised if you saw like something uh pushed forward in the georgia house
that was just completely like banning sex work and these kind of like massage parlors i wouldn't
be surprised if that happens that's who's gonna be that's who's gonna be completely fucked i mean and they took this
motherfucker totally unharmed again probably took him through a wendy's drive-thru where'd they get
him was he on the scene no i think he went through a different county they found him in a different
county they got reports from the cops there where it happened that that he was headed i guess he
was spot and he was headed up north.
So that's where they caught him at.
And they just real carefully
just put him in the car?
Yeah, gave him escort.
Yep.
Your Uber's here, sir.
Yeah, that's like,
that's the wages of,
you know,
you have a president
that says China virus
every day on the TV.
And then on top of that, just the continuing criminalization of sex work
and everything else.
It's a perfect storm.
It's so dark.
Yeah, man.
Yeah, because it's crazy.
He was like, oh, it wasn't race.
It was about sex workers.
Like, okay, motherfucker.
Like that's any better or whatever it's yeah
like you can't also hate sex workers and women and asian people right right yeah
yeah um ruby's trying to get in to say hi to y'all hi ruby
um we'll go to the patreon if you'd like to give us some money
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Ruby's growing
She's so big
I weighed her at my mom's
Because I don't have a scale here
um and she weighed like 22 pounds god damn it tanya that's gonna be a huge ass dog
her legs are so long you're gonna feed that an entire bag of food a week
oh yeah she's gonna be a monster god damn that's gonna be a big ass dog
it's only like it's only like two months old right now bigger than a small child man
god damn it's a small child right there all right we'll go to the patreon so tanya can
afford to feed her horse i was missing penny the pony so much.
I had to get my own.
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Peace out.
Bye.