Two Hot Takes - 124: Deep Rooted Problems..

Episode Date: July 20, 2023

Two Hot Takes host, Morgan, is joined by guest co-host Lauren!! This episode features stories that have you wonder if this a deep rooted problem with a lot more context behind it? Or perhaps the perso...n is just being a bit goofy.. Going to need your help dissecting these ones because they're out there! Our PO Box!! Two Hot Takes. 5042 Wilshire BLVD. #470. Los Angeles, CA 90036 Bonus Content on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/TwoHotTakes Watch our Iceland Travel Vlog!!! https://youtu.be/FISXcwnw49E Our SubReddit to Submit YOUR Stories!!! https://reddit.app.link/twohottakes Full length Video episodes available on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/TwoHotTakes Partners: Lume:  LumeDeodorant.com Promo Code: THT Gametime: Download the Gametime app, create an account, use code THT for $20 off! Athena Club: Get started with Athena Club today by shopping in-store at Target nationwide! PrettyLitter: PrettyLitter.com/THT 

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Just your reminder to subscribe. Love y'all. Bye and draw the show! Okay, okay. Here we go. Here we go. We should probably introduce you because it's been so long. People are gonna be like, I don't even know who that is. I know. Is this gonna come out next week? Yeah. Okay, so it'll be like two months exactly I think. Oh my god. Yeah. That's really bad. Where have I been? I don't know dude I've been trying to get you here. Have you though? I really have. It's been a mess. Hi guys. Welcome back. I'm Morgan. I was so cute. You were trying not to cut me off so you just froze. I was so cute. You were trying not to cut me off so you just froze We're struggling. Oh, we had the best time yesterday. We had such a good night. It was amazing Do you not say your name though? Oh, this is Lauren. Yeah, Lauren. There we go. Hello everybody, but last night
Starting point is 00:00:58 Yeah, it was amazing. We had like we had like a little barbecue at Justin's and It was meant to be like four or six people I don't know like a smaller group and it ended up being like close to 20. Yeah, but it was so cool There was like a guy named Shijid there that like he works for NASA There just was so many amazing people that we like got to meet and we invited Some girls that I met through like podcasting in a sense and then I invited them to my birthday. Birthday.
Starting point is 00:01:30 Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. Birthday.
Starting point is 00:01:38 Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. Birthday. first time I really hung out with them, so that was back in March. And now we've gone to brunch, and they came to the barbecue, but it's hard making friends as a 29 older, late 20s,
Starting point is 00:01:52 woman, it feels like. So when people show up, it's just like, it's amazing, there's no better feeling than someone showing up when you invite them. And girls actively trying to make new friends when you're trying to make new friends. And you just like, it just lines up so well. They were absolutely awesome too.
Starting point is 00:02:09 I, Steph and Anne, apparently, they were at Morgan's birthday party, but I don't know, I guess I was mingling on the other side of the room because I didn't remember meeting them and they didn't remember meeting me. But we had the best time with them last night. Like they weren't doing, like, what even call the voices that they were using?
Starting point is 00:02:27 It was like, it's from a movie. They sounded like Olaf. Or not Olaf, sorry, they sounded like that guy in Frozen who's like, you who big, someone blow out. Yeah, I'm talking about it. Yeah, it's like, I don't know, like a, what's this like Switzerland accent? Like, is that it? I don't know, Swiss a, what's this, like, Switzerland accent? Like, is that it?
Starting point is 00:02:46 I don't know, Swiss, like, yeah. But it's based off of a character. It's from the movie Just Go With It with Adam Sandler and Jennifer Aniston, Nick Swartzen. Okay. And he plays this, like, Dulf, the sheep ship on. Yeah, yes. And so they were doing a big, I didn't even know what they were doing
Starting point is 00:03:05 I couldn't stop laughing though. It was amazing. It was amazing. So yeah, we had a good time and I hope all of you out there are having a great time whatever time it is for you. Yes, we love when people have times These people in the stories we're going to read today are Not having good times. Yeah. We're getting back to our bread and butter, you know, back to the basics a little bit. Just some deep rooted problems that are very plausible problems. I think I've been scaring people lately with a lot of poop and incest.
Starting point is 00:03:42 Yeah, I've heard. Yeah. I felt bad after. I'm like, oh my God, people probably think I'm unhinged, but I just love to shock people. Yeah. And so I will also, some people have like a really, really, like that, like they, I can listen to stories
Starting point is 00:03:57 that are like gross about poop and be able to like eat at the same time. Like I've, I've seen this. It doesn't, unless I'm seeing it and smelling it whatever it doesn't affect me the story the same way Yeah, so but I understand because if you were talking about stories with like some type of surgery or something like that would make me cringe So I get how there's some people that are just like can't do it, but like yeah No, it's wild and I I'm all good We're not gonna talk about poop
Starting point is 00:04:25 for the next couple episodes, so no worries. We're not. But yeah, let's get into these deep-rooted problems. There's some intense ones. Okay. Okay, let's dive in. Woo. And like deep-rooted problems, it doesn't, it doesn't mean it's like, like, you know, all people say, like, oh, it's not that deep, bro.
Starting point is 00:05:05 I guess some of them might be even, is it that deep, is it a deep-rooted problem, or is this person just being like, just goofy? Yeah. You guys all tell me. I actually, so I started going to this therapist. It's only been three times. And something that she said to me,
Starting point is 00:05:24 I was like, that makes sense, because we were talking about just my upbringing and everything in my life. And something that she said to me that kind of stuck out to me is she was like, no reaction is random. It all stems from somewhere.
Starting point is 00:05:37 Yeah, it all stems from something. Like you feel really uncomfortable about something to do with money. Like it stems from something. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. So deep-rooted or not, like it stems from something. Do you know what I mean? Yep. So deep-rooted or not, like all of whatever you're about to tell me, it all has a, it's not random.
Starting point is 00:05:51 Okay, I like that. Well, we'll start with this one then. It is coming from Am I the asshole? It's titled Am I the asshole for telling my fiance? My daughter has to be in our wedding. I would say absolutely not. I, 45, mail have a daughter P from a previous relationship. I divorced my ex-wife on good terms
Starting point is 00:06:13 and we share 50-50 custody of P. She is now 11. After I divorced my ex-wife, I met my now fiance, S. S and my daughter get along very well. After five years in my relationship with S, I proposed. S was super excited and wanted to start planning right away. She looked at venues and started asking her friends to be her bridesmaids. She then told me she wanted her niece to be a flower girl, which I had no problem with, but I said I also wanted P to be a flower girl. S looked at me funny and then said that she didn't think P would fit the part. I got angry and told S that my daughter would be in our wedding.
Starting point is 00:06:54 S started to become upset and said that the girls in the wedding were up to her and P wouldn't be one of them. I told S that if P wasn't in the wedding, there might not be a wedding. Good for that. I stormed out if P wasn't in the wedding, there might not be a wedding. I stormed out and took P to get ice cream. P knows we are getting married and told me she thinks that she will look pretty in whatever dress S decides she should wear. And this broke my heart. I decided to text S. I told her I would be staying out of friends to think this over. My mother-in-law texted me saying that I'm overreacting
Starting point is 00:07:25 and that my daughter doesn't have to be in my wedding. And I was an ass for saying that I would cancel. So did I take it too far, saying I will cancel, am I overreacting, or just being a good dad? Did he say mother-in-law texted in that? Yeah. What is wrong with them? What?
Starting point is 00:07:42 What are we missing here? That is so fucked. This little girl is 11. What the house? She wouldn't fit the part. What does that even mean? Bitch, this reminds me, okay, given I'm like with Taylor coming out with her new music. But I kind of like reminded me of that one wedding song. You know what she's talking about? She's like, they'll have their, uh, this is stupid. Anyway, move on. What are you talking about? I just realized it's really done that I'm like referring to a Taylor Swift song about this horrible story, but Yeah, anyway a lot of people will appreciate it. It's literally the speak now song. Do you know what I'm talking about?
Starting point is 00:08:22 Yeah When she's she's the speak now song? No. The album is called Speak Now. No, I know. No one knows that song. I always thought it was interesting she made the album that song because no one knows that one. No, the only one that's coming to my head right now, my brain's a little mush.
Starting point is 00:08:39 But it's like, Romeo save me. No, that's not it. But yeah, that's only like save me. D-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d- family, not just the wife being ridiculous, but like the mother. Yeah, or the opposite. Yeah, that's actually crazy. I just don't get why you would want to exclude your partner's daughter. Yeah. You're marrying him. Jolice. Jolice. Going to be his wife. What?
Starting point is 00:09:15 Huge red flag. What do you think you'd call it off? Yeah. Well, like, what is going to happen down the road with this little girl? Yeah. How is she going to be treated? If she's not even welcome in the wedding, which is literally them uniting these two families. And oh, sorry, you're not in the wedding
Starting point is 00:09:28 because we don't want you in our family. That's like the message you're sending. What is her life gonna look like after? No, it's fucked immediately, Ron. Like I don't even have any advice for this because that's awful. Like if you are too jealous that your partner had, you know, children before you,
Starting point is 00:09:47 a wife before you, whatever, then like you should find somebody who didn't. You do not need to like, like go in and ruin other people's lives. Like that little girl talk about childhood drama. What do you mean? Like if her, her dad, like, followed through with that, like how awful would she feel? Terrible. So we do have an update on this one. Okay. But I'll read the top comment first.
Starting point is 00:10:11 Big red box, lots of awards. This is a big red flag. If she doesn't want to include her stepdaughter in her wedding, then I don't expect she will include your daughter in her life. Yeah, how could you? Just like what we were saying. Like I had a, my bio dad got married when I was like,
Starting point is 00:10:28 I was really little, I was probably like five, six maybe because me and my younger sister have eight years between us. So they were married for like two years, I think before they had her. So I was like five or six when they got married and she didn't really like me, but I was still the flower girl.
Starting point is 00:10:44 Yeah, like, yeah. She didn't even like me and I was the five or six when they got married, and she didn't really like me, but I was still the flower girl. Yeah, like, yeah. She didn't even like me, and I was the flower girl. Wild. Also, what's really scary about this, it's like, he even says, like, S and my daughter get along very well, which is like, is that an act then? Because you really, do you even like this little girl
Starting point is 00:11:02 because you're not having her be a flower girl? I'm having like all the movies go into mine right now, like thinking about Parent Trap and when she's like, oh, so cute to like the daughter right in front of him and then turns around and is like, listen here, you little brat.
Starting point is 00:11:15 I'm literally sending you off to board in school. The minute I say I do. Yeah, well, and I was like, okay, maybe 11 is like getting to like, you know, like, okay, 13 year old, I would be like, okay, maybe 13 year old junior brides made. I literally just had to Google what an 11 year old girl looks like, because I don't know what,
Starting point is 00:11:31 like, you know when you like someone holds up a baby and they're like, oh, look at my baby. And I'm like, really cute, how old? And I try to guess in my head, I am always way off. Like someone the other day was like, I was like, damn, that's a big baby. Like in my head, I said that, not to the lady. But I was like, oh my God, like it's little one too.
Starting point is 00:11:51 And she's like, no, only like 16 months. And I'm like, damn, that's a big baby. I mean, I can't tell age. I mean, from my head to Google, but from 11 to 13, I mean, who cares? Honestly, at that point, because even if my mom got remarried today, if I wanted to be a flower girl, she would be like, you're gonna be a flower girl then.
Starting point is 00:12:12 A lot of people remember we had a story where the someone fasted their friend, like a 30 year old woman to be their flower girl. No, I don't think that was me. Maybe it was Alejandra. And I was like, dude, I wouldn't do it. If you asked me to be your flower girl, I'd be pissed. You'd be pissed at me?
Starting point is 00:12:26 Yeah, because I'm supposed to be a bride's maid. I know, but I don't want to be a flower girl. But I want the more important job. I, if you asked me to be a flower girl, I would actually, we've already discussed that. That I laughed at. You're your co-made of honor. So you don't have all the responsibility and stress.
Starting point is 00:12:44 No, but I just don't, I don't get this. I feel like even if she, like, because I'm pulling out the comment, like she doesn't fit the part. And I'm like, well, why doesn't she fit the part? Do you feel she's too old? And you want like a really young little flower girl? Like, yeah, what, what does that mean? Even if she just wanted to have one flower girl, let's say just specifically because she's, you know, anal about like the order of everything. Like you said, it's like still have her be a junior bride's maid or like some type of be like be a part of the wedding. And you know, it's, that's family. That's really, really close family. Like someone who's so incredibly important
Starting point is 00:13:18 to the person you're marrying, how could you try to be this like dictator and just be like, nah, get out. Yeah, wild. I don't, I'm really perplexed by this one, but let's get to the up days. Yes, please. Hey, Reddit, thanks everyone for all the kind words and suggestions to answer a few questions. My daughter is not disabled,
Starting point is 00:13:36 Chubby, or having an awkward phase. I did ask if P could be a groom's man. S immediately shot me down. S is 39. She is the same race as my daughter. This is her first marriage. I tried to answer as many comments as possible. Wait, sorry.
Starting point is 00:13:54 Asked who to be a groom's man? His daughter. Because he's like, well, if you don't want her as a flower girl, let me put her on my side. Got it. Okay. Easy. Yeah, there you go.
Starting point is 00:14:04 It's good. I came home to talk to S today. When I pulled in our driveway, my mother-in-law was there sitting in her car. I got out and went inside, trying to avoid talking to mother-in-law. S was sitting at the kitchen table and I joined her. She sat in silence, so I asked the first question, why does P not fit the part? And why don't you want her in the wedding at all? Her answer full on shocked me. She quietly said, I was hoping that after the wedding, you could become a holiday visit only dad. I didn't want her in the wedding so she wouldn't be in the photos around the house since she wasn't going to be around much.
Starting point is 00:14:40 Why? I literally just got full body chills. Oh my God, isn't it crazy? Yeah, you can think you know someone and then you fucking don't. Wow. I literally have the chills. Look at my arm, I'm like,
Starting point is 00:14:55 why, why are you so evil? I'm just so happy that she didn't trap. Yeah, I'm just so happy she outed herself. Like I'm not even mad, I'm happy because this is a great ending. Yeah, it's a great story. Wow, I kept my cool, calmly took her hand and pulled my engagement ring off. Her eyes started to tear up and she said we shouldn't end the marriage over this. And that she can change.
Starting point is 00:15:21 I told her the damage was already done. Done. I told her I wanted her things moved out by the next week and that she could come get them when my daughter wasn't home. The house is in my name and I paid for it. I was allowing her to get her furniture that she paid for. She stormed out and mother-in-law came knocking on the door, saying I was being unreasonable.
Starting point is 00:15:39 I couldn't imagine only seeing my daughter three or four times a year. The fact that S wanted me to give up part of my custody blew me away. Wild. How did she, how did she concoct that in her brain? Like what made her think that that would be a thing? And also you kind of wonder too, like how she was raised if her mom is like behind her being like, yeah, this makes sense. How does that fucking make sense?
Starting point is 00:16:04 Like imagine if they had kids together, and then they got divorced, and then his new wife was like, have nothing to do with your children. Yeah. Or imagine, like, if someone said that to her, if she had children, he got, like, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:16:17 She got remarried, and then her new husband was like, nope, can't see your children anymore. Like, that is the most psychotic thought of all time. Like, it's just unbelievable. It's really disgusting. He goes on to end it. I'm sitting on my couch just in shock. Our honeymoon was supposed to be in Hawaii.
Starting point is 00:16:36 Looks like me and P will be going instead. I will update again if anything happens. I, yeah, top comment, holy shit. first things first, you are amazing father. Yeah. Good on you for having peace back. Yeah. Because we have seen posts that have not gone this way. We have so many stories actually from our listeners on Father Know Something, my other
Starting point is 00:17:00 podcast we have. And there's so many listeners that are like, my dad got remarried and my stepmom wanted nothing to do with us. She's the worst person. We stop seeing my dad. Yep. And that shouldn't happen. No. Those are your, your children is shocking like how that this isn't just like a no-brainer for everybody. What this guy did because it is, it does happen. And there are a lot of weak people out there, and that's what I think of them as weak, because they do want a relationship with their children,
Starting point is 00:17:31 but they'd rather just be controlled by their partner, because whatever, I don't know, they just don't think that they're good enough, I don't know what they think, but it's weak people. I wonder where that stems from, right? Where you start at the beginning where every reaction comes from, it's not random. Yeah, it's not random.
Starting point is 00:17:52 I love that. And I just wonder where that comes from. And I think you do make a good point about her mom being there, like kind of championed this. Yeah, you're crazy, you're an asshole, you're being unreasonable. And it's like, I wonder, I'm so curious. And it's like, is she an only child?
Starting point is 00:18:08 And like, she's threatened by that closeness that he has with his daughter, that he almost looks at. She looks at the little girl as like a threat. Right. Like, she's gonna interject and not make your relationship as strong. Like, just maybe like really insecure attached. Yeah. For sure. I just, wow. did not make your relationship as strong, like just maybe like really insecure attachment.
Starting point is 00:18:25 Yeah. For sure. I just, wow. There's a lot of comments from OP. So I'll be sure to post the link for this one on the YouTube description, but he does reply quite a bit. And someone's just like, I would immediately replace the locks. I called the guys coming Tuesday.
Starting point is 00:18:44 Hopefully someone goes hopefully he lets his first wife know ASAP because their daughter is going to seek answers from her mother as well as dad. They sound like they co-parent well so they really need to make sure they agree on how they discuss this with their love and your old. And OP goes, my ex-wife knows about the situation because I had to have peace at her house while I figure all of this out. So that's great. Yeah. Someone's like, wow, holy shit.
Starting point is 00:19:07 She's been faking this whole time. Wild. Which that's what really scares me. That like level of like five year relationship and you despise this little girl, but you're actually pretending. What? Also, I think people need a reminder
Starting point is 00:19:25 that everything doesn't just change because you got married. Do you know what I mean? I feel like people have in their head that like once you get married, that like everything is going to change. No, unless you and your partner have a discussion of things that you want to do, goals you want,
Starting point is 00:19:41 and you plan them out together, that's when change happens. You don't just get married and then everything you made up in your head happens. Like now she's like, oh, it's just me and him now. We get to start a brand new family. All by ourselves have no one else involved. Like, why did you make that up in your head for five years? It's crazy. OP responds back to that one. He's like, I know right. I wish I would have caught it sooner. Ugh. I never truly noticed a negative thing. Pee has never said anything negative about S and asked her mom earlier today
Starting point is 00:20:10 when she will get to see her again. So like this little girl even felt like she liked her. Yeah. This is nuts. That is another level of unhinged. I wonder if it's just like, that's too hard to say, because I'm like, maybe she was
Starting point is 00:20:26 just going through like a mental break. Like she, she, all of a sudden was just feeling panicked and feeling so insecure that she didn't know how to like compartmentalize her feelings and she lashed out and acted like ridiculous and she would be able to actually get help and come back around. But the fact that she has her mom behind her being like, me, me, me, it like makes it hard to think that it's just like a moment of like, you know, flooded insecurity and flooded feelings and not knowing how to channel them. It feels like it's way more premeditated. This does feel premeditated because it's like, I don't know even if she was flustered
Starting point is 00:20:56 and having just like a bad reaction. I don't know if like a sane person, their first reaction would be to jump like, hey, I don't want your daughter to run. Let's chipper off. Yeah. Like that's totally. Even when you're upset, like, yeah, you think you would be to jump, like, hey, I don't want your daughter around, let's ship her off. Yeah. Like that's totally. Even when you're upset, like, yeah, you think you'd lash out and be like, I don't really want, you know,
Starting point is 00:21:12 P to affect us, like, I just kind of want it to be selfish and like spend more time with you, like, right, I don't, but to be like, I plan, I plan only holiday visits, like, well, and the pictures, that's where you know it was so free meditation, exactly. Because she didn, and the pictures. That's where you know, was so free meditative. Exactly. Because she didn't want the little girl in pictures around the house. Yeah. Because if people come over and ask, Oh my God, how's your daughter? Who's this little girl?
Starting point is 00:21:34 She's going to be embarrassed. It's like, God, and I can get how people can, like, feel very insecure about, like, someone having a family before them and them not having a family, like before that person. Don't date people. But they don't date them and them not having a family like before that person Don't date people. Don't date them. You don't date like and that's like like I know people that are like married now Like handful of people that are married now to like a guy who has kids Yeah, and they welcome those kids in like as if they're their own when those kids are there like they love them with all their heart Yeah, sit in them a part of their family. All theandress cousin is the perfect example. Yep. She married a guy recently and they're expecting a little one now. But he had three kids before her.
Starting point is 00:22:15 And they're all a family. Yeah. That's how it's done. That's how it's done. Has to be if you are going to date somebody who has children. That's like one thing I don't get. Like, I know it's really hard to get divorced, especially if there's cheating involved. There's like a lot of emotions with that. Like, it sucks, right? It's a very big bad breakup. But at the same time, I don't know why people can't put their shit aside and just co-parent amicably.
Starting point is 00:22:43 Yeah. Like, at least for your kids, be kind in front of your kids, especially like there shouldn't be screaming matches, there shouldn't be fighting. I just saw the most amazing video on TikTok of this couple and I had never seen their videos before. I don't know if they have a big following, but they are getting divorced or got divorced and the guy was was still coming over to have a family barbecue in the backyard. Yeah. And they're not together. They're just co-parenting very well.
Starting point is 00:23:14 And it's like, why can't you do that for your kids? Right. Yeah, my childhood best friend, her parents got divorced. And he ended up buying a house next door. They're not like next door. Not right next door, but like down the street. Yeah, and so it was really amazing for the kids because they could just literally pick their bike.
Starting point is 00:23:32 Like, yeah, they'd be like, oh, I forgot something at Dad's, I'll be right back. You don't even mean anything. And then the parents got along so well too that they could just like knock on the door and be like, hey, could I have some sugar? Yeah. No, it was so nice.
Starting point is 00:23:44 Well, and Justin and I were talking about that because it's like, you never planned for divorce but like, you just like, you kind of want like, all your T's crossed, eyes dotted, like that kind of thing and like, we were just talking about like, because his parents were divorced and it wasn't, like there was a lot there, but we were just kind of talking like, yeah, well, I think like if we had kids and we got divorced,
Starting point is 00:24:06 I don't think we would ever be bad to each other. Yeah. Like I could see us being the like, hey, we're having one Christmas. Right. Justin brings his new wife for girlfriend or whatever. I have my new partner and like we all come together. Like that is like beautiful. That's like what I will have.
Starting point is 00:24:21 Yeah. If like anything we don't work out, things we grow apart, whatever it is, like that is what I will have. Well, If anything, we don't work out things, we grow apart, whatever it is, that is what I will have. Well, it's funny you say that too about not planning for divorce because at this point in time, I mean, we're all very educated on the fact that divorce happens very, very often. It's not this like estranged concept anymore. And so I actually do think about that when I'm dating.
Starting point is 00:24:44 I think about how this person be as a partner, how they be as a husband, how they be as a parent, how they be, if I got divorced with them, how would they be if they were a co-parent to me? And I think about those things now, because I'm like, that's the reality is that if that does happen, you want someone that you can rely on, even if things go bad. But you know that like they're still not going to make your life hell. They're still going to be like very civil. They still respect you as a person, even if that means that they can't love you in a romantic relationship.
Starting point is 00:25:17 And that, like, that's so important. And that's, yes. Yes. Yes. I think that's like another reason, like, be very selective who you have kids with. Oh, yeah. Wait, and that goes every way. I want to keep talking about it. The sperm donor, the egg donor, whatever that looks like, be so selective who you have kids with, because even if you can have a good co-parenting situation sometimes, yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:44 And if you can have a good co-parenting situation sometimes, just yeah. So I want to, I was talking to my friend about this and I was talking about how like whenever I question if I want kids, it lets a releases like so much freedom when I think like it's okay if I don't have them because it's like at like our age, it's really easy to get in the mindset where it's just like I have to make this work because I'm, you know, clock is ticking. I want children so badly and I want it happen with a partner blah, blah, blah. And so whenever I feel for a second, like, well, maybe I don't know if I need kids, then it's this like, like, like, wait, lift it off my shoulder, like a freedom. Like it's like, it's like, oh, this other day too, like thinking about having kids just
Starting point is 00:26:24 like gives you anxiety or something. Yeah, and but anyway, my friend responded and she's like, dude, me and my husband were just talking about how a timeline to have kids causes so many incompatible relationships. Like there's so many better matches for people but they're scared. And if I can say anything cause she just had a kid,
Starting point is 00:26:42 if I can say anything about having a kid, it needs to be the right person because it has the lowest of lows. I honestly think people are better off doing it alone rather than with the wrong person because you were so vulnerable. Solarissa. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:58 Little Larissa. Yeah, no, that is so, so true. And like, I look at what my mom went through because me and my brothers have the same mom, and we all have different dads. And me and my older brother, Matt, our dads were not great, were not involved, had alcohol issues, and my mom basically did do it alone.
Starting point is 00:27:19 It sucks. Yeah, it doesn't have to be that way. But, and it's not to say like single mom, like you still happy, healthy, loved kid. Like, it is better to be alone, essentially, than with the wrong person. So, right. One of this week's partners is Loomy.
Starting point is 00:27:38 I don't know about you guys, but as I age, I start noticing my body odor smell changes. Maybe it's hormones. I don't know, but lately, if I don't put deodorant on, I am merely, no, like I'm running about, doing my errands and I get away from, I'm like, and Loomy has totally changed the game for me. I started with the starter pack they sent me
Starting point is 00:27:58 and I am now on my third order and it works for a long time. And according to Loomy, it's clinically proven to control odor everywhere. Pits, privates, and beyond for a whopping 72 hours. And I notice, I wore this stuff in Cabo, I'd put it on in the morning,
Starting point is 00:28:16 go to the beach, sweat, hot, go on the boat, sweat, hot. I didn't stink, and my clothes didn't stink. And it makes sense because Loomy was actually designed by an OB-GYN, which is also why loomie is great to use below the belt. And another amazing thing about loomie, it's aluminum free, baking soda free, and paraben free. If you want to try it for yourself, loomie starter pack is perfect for new customers. It comes with a solid stick deodorant, cream tube deodorant, two free products of your choice, like mini body wash
Starting point is 00:28:47 and deodorant wipes and free shipping. And as a special offer for listeners, new customers get $5 off a Loomy starter pack with code THT at loomeediodorant.com. That equates to over 40% off your starter pack. When you visit loomeediodorant.com and use code THT. Trigger running on this one you guys, it does contain talks of miscarriage and pregnancy loss. Speaking of babies and pregnancy, perfect time for this next one. Cool. I thought you were about to make an announcement. No, no, I'm going to be so pumped when you get pregnant.
Starting point is 00:29:28 I'm like, wait, I gotta check my little app. I'm like, what do I do? Imagine if you were pregnant right now, and I just said that. As I'm drinking a white claw. Honestly, as long as it's like within the first six weeks, I'm pretty sure drinking's fine. Yeah. I don't, yeah. I mean, so many people find out that that's what I'm pretty sure drinking is fine. Yeah. I don't, yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:45 I mean, so many people find out that that's what I'm saying. Yeah. I mean, I'm not saying like recommend it or like prescribing that, but I'm just saying like, don't drink if you're pregnant. I know, I know people who have gotten pregnant and they had no idea and they were like partying and everything. Oh, you drink for that all the time, yeah. Yeah, for sure.
Starting point is 00:30:02 So, full of this next one. It is two days old, coming from suspicious hair. It's titled, Am I the asshole for making a joke when my friend told me she was pregnant. My friend, Alice, 32 female and her husband have been trying for a baby for about three years. I, 29 female, am child-free, but this has never caused a problem in my relationship with Alice. We would often joke about this difference, with me telling
Starting point is 00:30:31 her stuff like, she'll miss all the disposable income when she has kids, and her comparing my dog to a human kid. Neither of us got offended with this joking, and it was all in good fun. On Friday, Alice and a couple of other friends and I went out to lunch, and Alice told us that she was three months pregnant. I jokingly said, quote, I'm so sorry. Let me know if you need a ride to the clinic. Alice flipped out and called me an insensitive bitch. I told her that I was joking, but she wouldn't hear it and she ended up leaving.
Starting point is 00:31:05 She hasn't responded to my text and calls ever since. Our other friends are staying out of it and don't want to give their opinions. I understand that my comment would come off as rude if I said it to a stranger, but Alice knows me and this is how we joke with each other. Am I the asshole? I mean, yeah, you are. Dude, read the fucking room. But like, I also don't like, she said, I don't think it's that, that deep, like, I think it's something that should be able to be recovered from.
Starting point is 00:31:35 But I think she also needs to like, realize that that was wrong to say. Do you know what I mean? It sounds like right now, she's in the stage where she's like, I didn't do anything wrong. Defensive. It's defensive. And it's just like, yeah, we get that you guys had a really funny sense of humor. But like, now this is serious. She has a child that she's protecting. That's her goal right now. That's her main purpose right now is protecting this child. So, yes, to make that joke was insensitive. And you should apologize. And I'm sure your friendship can recover.
Starting point is 00:32:06 Yeah, I also think it sounds like this person thinks, like, oh, I'm child-free, she wants kids. Like, it's never caused issues, but it almost sounds like she's not truly respecting what her friend wants. Like, making comments, even, you're gonna miss all your disposable income when you have kids.
Starting point is 00:32:29 She called that a joke, but maybe she didn't even think it was funny the entire time. I'm like, I don't think that's even how's that funny. Right. And also why is my income any of your concern? Right. I'm saying that like she made it seem like her friend thought it was really funny and built off a bit. But maybe she actually was just like trying to like ignore it and just brush it off by like meeting it with another like humorous thing. Well, and I also think too, like she's been trying actively trying to get pregnant for three years. Yeah, that is fucked.
Starting point is 00:32:57 Three years is a long time. Yeah, that is fucked. Like I did my whole grad program in three years. Yeah, I felt never ending. Sort of actively be trying for a baby for three years. Yeah. And every month you get so excited. That makes you so much worse.
Starting point is 00:33:10 So excited. And then you just like, you bring your closest people together and you're sitting at this table. And after three long, hard fought years of sex, ovulation, pee strips, pregnancy tests, being let down, you finally get your moment to say, I'm actually pregnant, three months, I'm out of the danger zone. God you're so right. And you just like, you expect your closest people to be excited and like, yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:36 And then literally you're met with, hey, do you want to ride to the clinic? Yeah, that's actually so, fucks. You're so right. This is a very wanted, like prayed for a baby, and you wanna ride the clinic. Let me know when you wanna ride. What the fuck? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:52 I literally just got the chills again. I'm like, why are people so fucked? I know, and I was that first thinking, like if they just always make jokes like that, then she fucked up. Like she thought that was just like a part of their relationship, their humor. But like now, like whenever I remember the three-year part, I'm like, that is so horrible. Like that detail alone, knowing that about your friend and then saying that, like, and on top of it, like she probably, like she told them, she waited three months to tell them.
Starting point is 00:34:23 She probably was really scared. So excited and so scared. Like, you know what I mean? Like so excited when she hit three months mark that she's like, we're good. We're good to go. I can tell everyone now I'm so excited. Well, and you don't even know what she's gone through in those three years. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:34:38 Yeah. If she's had miscarriages, if there's actually pregnancy losses. So it's like it to be met with that. Now I feel like crying. I'm so, I'm so mad for her. I would have literally and like how she handled it is probably so smart like remove yourself. But I would just like I would literally mean all Honda we're talking about this yesterday where it's like we we think about ourselves and how we respond in situations and you know have you seen that thing where it's like, this guy told his wife, or this wife told her husband,
Starting point is 00:35:09 like, just know, like, I could be so much meaner to you. And we were like thinking about that concept. And like, in this moment, I would want to be so mean. I would just look at her and be like, Kay, you can go home. You're clearly not excited for me. You can leave. Yeah. You're not not excited for me. You can leave. You're not gonna ruin my baby brunch.
Starting point is 00:35:28 Right. Fuck you, literally. Oh. She didn't even get a congratulations first. She literally got an, I'm so sorry. You know, if you need a ride to the clinic. That is actually so wild. How many updates on that?
Starting point is 00:35:43 Okay, so the top comments that she was supposed to say. The top comment is you're the asshole. Not everything is a joke. on that? Okay, so the top comments, top comment is you're the asshole. Not everything is a joke. She tried for a baby for years and you couldn't give her a moment of earnest support and congratulations. This is exactly like people who get up
Starting point is 00:35:55 and give attention sucking allegedly funny best man or made of honor speeches at weddings or worse yet stand up with a joky joke. Just kidding, not really objecting objection. FYI, if she has struggled with infertility for three years, and you didn't hear about this pregnancy until three months, oh, yeah, this is what I was thinking. She's likely had miscarriages or chemical pregnancies
Starting point is 00:36:18 you didn't know about. Even if that's not the case, she almost certainly spent the last couple of months scared this pregnancy won't make it. Of all the jokes you could make. That was the worst one. God, that was so mean. I want to kill this person.
Starting point is 00:36:33 No, that's aggressive. That's too far. But they do respond. Okay. What? Okay. So, someone goes, they've been trying for three years and your first response is to joke to her
Starting point is 00:36:48 about giving her a ride to an abortion clinic. They've been trying for three years. This joke was insensitive considering she may be petrified about miscarrying after trying for so long. Your jokes may have worked back then, but the circumstances have now changed. Apologize to your friend, you're the asshole. And OP responds, she has actually had a couple
Starting point is 00:37:09 of miscarriages. I didn't make that connection. Fuck, I get it now. Oh, wow. Wow, at least they get it now. Someone responds after, how did you not make that connection? Yeah, wow. And they go, it was like two years ago, and the whole pregnancy slash kids things is so foreign to me, so I didn't really think much about it.
Starting point is 00:37:34 Mmm, you better beg on your knees apologizing. That's the thing right now where it's like, be child-free if you want to be child-free, but then don't judge people and ridicule people that want kids. That's ridiculous. Like, you're not high in mighty. You're like, maybe you're doing the plan in a favor. I don't fucking know.
Starting point is 00:37:53 But like, don't fucking judge other people. Fff. Wow. I wouldn't, I don't know if I would be friends with this person after this. Especially the fact that they know I had struggled and had losses. I don't think I would be able to forgive them. Or if I did, it would be at a very arms length relationship. I agree. Moving along.
Starting point is 00:38:18 Yeah, moving along. I know. It's one of those things where it just makes me feel, I guess, it feels a little too real. Like some of these stories are so mind blowing that it's just like, wow, like this guy got his mom pregnant. Like, you know, something that's just so mind blowing and a story like this just makes me, like makes my stomach turn because it just hurts.
Starting point is 00:38:40 And you can just imagine how she must feel that like her friend going through all of this and then experience it a comment like that, which is meant to be a joke, meant to be innocent, but it like, it cuts so deep, you know? It's just one of those like little things that just, yeah, I'm ready to move on. I just don't get how some people think
Starting point is 00:39:00 their jokes are funny. It's not funny. In what world would that ever be? You're fucking funny. It's not funny. In what world would that ever be fucking funny? It wouldn't. It would never. Another one of this week's partners is Game Time. I don't have my Taylor Swift tickets yet, and it's okay. I'm not stressing, and I know a lot of Swifties are, but I think that's because they haven't discovered Game Time. Game Time is the fast and easy way to buy tickets for all sports, music, comedy, and theater near you.
Starting point is 00:39:28 They have killer last minute deals and their best price guarantee. So you can stop stressing over getting those tickets and starting hyped for all the fun you're about to have. I've got my eyes on those swifty tickets, but I have used game time for Lakers tickets and it was a breeze. I sent my dad and Uncle Jimmy to a game and getting the tickets was so easy. They downloaded right to my phone. I even got a flash deal so I saved extra money and they had an amazing time.
Starting point is 00:39:56 And what I love is Game Time has the lowest price guarantee. They have event cancellation protection and job loss protection. And they also have images of the seat views, so you know exactly what you're getting. No obstructive views, right, guys? Game time is the fastest growing ticketing app in the country for a reason. You can buy tickets in a matter of seconds,
Starting point is 00:40:15 two taps, and you're all set. If you want to try it for yourself and snag the tickets without the stress, use Game Time. Download the Game Time app, create an account, and use code THT for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply, again, create an account, and redeem code THT for $20 off.
Starting point is 00:40:34 Download game time today. Last minute tickets, lowest price guaranteed. Okay, up next. Wow, that was a brutal one too. Oh, let's just stay on the task of babies, shall we? We're really flowing today. It's nice, very nice. This one is titled,
Starting point is 00:40:54 I Roomed My Sisters Gender Reveal Out of Spite. Straight into it, my sister had been sleeping with my then boyfriend, and only revealed the fact after we got engaged. So as to quote, save me from getting married to a cheater. And because she felt remorseful and ashamed, I broke up with him and cut off my sister, only tolerating her during family gatherings, which I rarely ever came to if I knew she was going to be there.
Starting point is 00:41:22 I moved to another state for a job and to start fresh. So I've been away from home for quite a while. Months later, I was told my sister and ex-boyfriend got engaged. To say I was livid was an understatement, but I wasn't going to let them disturb me from my life. Wow. I came back recently at my mother's request since she assured me my sister wouldn't be
Starting point is 00:41:49 there. Only to find out she was in fact there. I managed to calm myself and pretend I was okay with everything. Deep down I was upset. More at my mom for lying to me though. It turns out they called me for my sister's planned gender reveal party, which I would have never attended had I known beforehand. I never even knew she was pregnant, but I was there already so I had to put on my fake smile. Night came and for the first time in a long time my sister engaged me in a conversation
Starting point is 00:42:19 and apologized for everything and wanted to make up. I wanted to bite her head off and tell her to go to hell because the fricking audacity. But then she told me about the gender of her baby. She already knew. To try to rekindle the times where we used to tell and trust each other with everything. At some point, as we were talking, I was reminded of when we used to be best friends.
Starting point is 00:42:43 And honestly, I was tired of the bitterness and to be best friends, and honestly, I was tired of the bitterness and wanted to let bygones be bygones. I watched her plan out everything, spend a ton of money, excited and all, but just the night before the gender reveal, ex-boyfriend showed up and it took me right back to the past. It kept playing over and over in my head how it was betrayed by them and I got absolutely pissed at how they were happy even after what they did to me. I realized I never had the intention of forgiving them, so in an attempt to get back at them,
Starting point is 00:43:15 I told everyone the gender of the baby right then and there. One glance at her and she was on the verge of tears, staring at me with the cheating scumbag. She didn't say anything and just stormed off. It was awkward. Everybody immediately knew why I did it, so it didn't come as a surprise. Nobody said anything and we all called it a night. I'm not going to lie, it felt good seeing them distraught, it brought me a sense of comfort.
Starting point is 00:43:42 All their money had gone to waste and she was upset and refused to leave her room, so the reveal never happened. The house is quiet, but I can see the judgmental looks I'm getting from everyone, so I'm booking a flight back because there's no point in me being here anymore. I don't feel an ounce of regret. In fact, I feel peace and that ease. Good. This is an interesting one.
Starting point is 00:44:05 I mean, I know it's not technically like the right thing to do, but like I good. Like I don't see, I don't feel regret for her either. Yeah. That's like, fuck them. I think, you know what she did was worse. Definitely worse.
Starting point is 00:44:21 Yeah. You, we're having sex with your sister's boyfriend? Exactly. That's why I'm like, man, people don't get to see this really overplayed of whatever you want to call it. Like show of telling your baby's gender, don't give a fuck. Fuck you. Don't give a fuck.
Starting point is 00:44:40 No. Wow. That's like the like, wait, are you kidding me? Like, you're going to go in your room and cry all day over it? Like what? No, you're, sorry, I hate this girl. I just can't believe they stayed together. Like I can.
Starting point is 00:44:53 Trash loves trash. I love that. Someone goes, honestly, this makes me laugh of all the people for your ex to cheat on you with, he chooses your sister. Yep, I think it's funny and they deserve it. Mm-hmm, I agree. Yeah, fuck her. I don't know why you would expect things
Starting point is 00:45:13 to ever go back to normal. Your playing house, it wasn't just like they were dating. They got engaged. They were planning on spending the rest of their life together. And then you told your sister? Yeah, and what a fucking loser. Like the fact that he was cheating on her and then he decides to propose to her during that time.
Starting point is 00:45:31 And then he's like, oh shit, that didn't work out. Hey, do you wanna get engaged? Literally a couple of months later, they gone gay. Oh, okay. Also, as the other sister, like the one that was the evil one, wouldn't you be, be like, damn, like this is a pity proposal.
Starting point is 00:45:48 Like, like, no, because I'm second pick. No, because people like that think like I won. I won the man. I beat my sister. That's how they think. They don't think of it like the reality that it fucking is. Such delusion. Such delusion. Yeah, such delusion.
Starting point is 00:46:08 I wonder if there's any other comments from OP. Wow, that one really got me jumbled. It's only four days old, it's very new. Of course the mods remove it. The top comment though, is they expected, da da da, something different? That's hilarious. Literally.
Starting point is 00:46:27 If she were rational, she would have just been like, well, that was rude, but I suppose I deserve that. Yeah. Let's still do the reveal because it's fun. Yeah. You know what I mean? I mean, or just like, hey, fuck it. I mean, you could be like to the sister, you could be like, hey, are we even now? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:49 We good, yeah, we good. But the fact that I'm gonna go eat my fucking blue cake, yeah, the fact that she's gonna pity herself and cry in her room all day and then get the rest of the family to give her judgmental looks is just like, nah. I'd be over there like, cheers. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:47:03 Literally, I know the rest of the family sucks too. It is funny, someone comments down there like, it would have been rude for OP to do that in any other situation, but the guests were probably like, quote, well, she did steal OP's fiance, so I guess we'll just call it a night. Yeah. Like even, no one, no one even reacted by the sound of it.
Starting point is 00:47:21 Well, she said that she felt judgmental looks, but that's about it. Which could have been bad. And that could have been, but that's about it. That could have been... That could have been, and that could have been just like, I feel like some people could have been like, dude, what the fuck? Like, you know what I mean? Like, what?
Starting point is 00:47:32 And that, yeah, that's probably feels judgmental for sure, but, you know. I mean, I understand that it wasn't like the right thing to do and that if you were to like go and talk to a therapist about it, that's not what their recommendation would be. Yeah. But, you know, sometimes moments like sometimes moments like this, I like to hear it. I can't help it. I do.
Starting point is 00:47:50 Yeah. I'm happy she did it. I am too. Cool. Moving along. Another one of this week's partners is Athena Club. I have always had a really hard time with razors, whether that's razor burn, ingrown hairs,
Starting point is 00:48:04 or cuts that look like a cat attacked me, I've never had good luck until a Thena Club. A Thena Club leaves my legs looking amazing, soft, feeling fresh, because their razor blade is surrounded by water activated serum that has shea butter and hyaluronic acid, which is the holy grail and makes complete sense why my legs look and feel amazing after shaving.
Starting point is 00:48:26 And the best part, a Theonaclub's razor kit is only $10. And it comes with two blades, a magnetic hook for your shower, and a choice of hand-of-color, which comes in black and white from my neutral loving people. This razor is the first razor I haven't lost yet, and I have purple right now, but hey, if I ever lose it, white is on my list. And with a Thena Club, you never have to stress about refills.
Starting point is 00:48:49 You can have your replacement blades shipped to you on a schedule of your choice, or you can even find them in Target. Nationwide! So if you want to try it for yourself, show your skin you care with a Thena Club Razor Kit. Get started with the Thena Club today by shopping in store at Target Nationwide. Just head to the shaving aisle to buy your razor and refills. Oh, Kiddokay.
Starting point is 00:49:13 So this next one, it's four hours old. Whoa. I don't know why I picked it. It's only got 800 upvotes, but I just really like the title and I'm curious. I haven't read it yet. Okay. Both blind reacting. Wow. So it's titled, Am I just really liked the title and I'm curious. I haven't read it yet. Okay. Both blind reacting. Wow.
Starting point is 00:49:26 So it's titled, Am I the asshole for telling my 30 female husband, 35 male, that I don't want to sell the house to save his dog? Hello, as the title says, my husband adopted a female husky on a whim before we met. He never researched the breed or anything about dogs. He refused to spay her because as he says, she wouldn't be a real Husky and would lose her personality, which we all know isn't true. She is now eight years old. Side note, the house our family lives in is his, purchased before me, and he is currently
Starting point is 00:50:01 unemployed because he lost his job in June and hasn't received government assistance yet. His credit cards are maxed out right now, and he is living off his savings. My salary covers family expenses, but nothing else. In the past year, we've spent a total of 8K of our emergency savings on emergency vet bills for the dog. One, he gave her a bone full of fat, which I told him not to give her, and she was hospitalized for pancreatitis. Two, she had a mammary tumor.
Starting point is 00:50:32 That was thankfully benign, so surgery to remove the mass. He still wouldn't spay her. Three, she had a phantom pregnancy a few months ago, so another trip to the vet for tests, where I finally convinced him to spay her for the spain. Five, now, three weeks after the spain, she has a large mass on another tit.
Starting point is 00:50:54 It's very bad and leaking red. Since my husband has no job and no income, his solution to pay for the vet bills, multiple tumor removals, chemotherapy, etc. is to sell his car. I have my own that he used for work every day. And then the house that our children and I live in. Okay. He needs my okay to sell as we are married and it is registered as a family residence. He says he refuses to let his dog die over a tumor.
Starting point is 00:51:23 He has a very unhealthy attachment to his dog. She basically replaced his dad after his dad's passing eight years ago. And says she's the only thing he had after the passing. Okay. Oh, at first I was like, okay, and now I'm like, okay. I have animals of my own and I understand not wanting to let them go and doing everything for them, but I think this is excessive and I think everyone needs a limit where they say, I'm not going to put myself in crippling debt and be homeless for this. He obviously thinks I'm an asshole for not being okay with the house and car being sold and things I'm even more of an asshole because I financially can't and don't want to put myself in huge amounts of debt for the dog when we are already struggling on one income.
Starting point is 00:52:14 So I ask everyone am I the asshole. No, not at all and he needs therapy like yes, because that's that's what it is that attachment to his dad. Yeah. And connected to the dog. Like, it makes me cry. But he needs, he needs to get therapy through that because it's, I mean, unfortunately, like those bigger dogs, like they at around like 10 years old, like, that is when it happens. And so, yeah, it's just like he has children. He needs to, he needs to focus on the now. And I think that that what's going on is that he's not, he has children. He needs to focus on the now.
Starting point is 00:52:46 And I think that what's going on is that he's not, he feels like he couldn't save his dad and he's going to save this dog instead. You know what I mean? I feel like that's where a lot of this is coming from. So it's like, you're so right. It breaks my heart, but he needs to let it go. Well, and I mean, there's so many things he could do.
Starting point is 00:53:06 Like, is there other family members that he could be a bar or money from? And maybe if you put the dog into an adoption center too, like there's also a chance, like those places get so much like funding from volunteers and like they have, you know, vets that are there constantly. So it's like, there's always the chance that they would help that dog.
Starting point is 00:53:26 He would just have to release the ownership. For sure. But there's also a lot of vets that do give back and do pro bono stuff too. So maybe there's options. But the thing is here, this is the second time this dog has had a tumor now. And she mentions chemotherapy.
Starting point is 00:53:42 So I'm assuming that this tumor that the dog has now is cancerous. Yeah. And I'm just wondering, is there more? Yeah. Is the dog's whole body? Yeah. You know, like malignant tumors everywhere, because at that point, you have to also think about what am I putting my animal through?
Starting point is 00:54:01 Yeah. Chemotherapies, no walk in the park. And so what is this dog's quality of life, gonna be? It's, and that's kind of like why people do get to the point where they have to put their dogs down. I don't really understand when I was younger because I just thought, why not let them live the longest that they possibly can?
Starting point is 00:54:18 But it's like this animal is in pain. Like is not wanting, is, you know, you're allowing this animal to suffer. So sometimes it is the right thing to do. It just sucks. I know. This was a really hard decision. We had to go through last Christmas, like not this past one, but the one before.
Starting point is 00:54:37 It's all, I can't believe it's already been so long, but our German-chreppard bear, he was 11, maybe 12, I think 11 though. And he was running outside one day, playing with the ponies, following me around, and then the next couldn't get off his bed, was like coughing up blood, like really just so, so bad. Like we literally all three of us had to like pick him up. He couldn't even get himself up. And so we take him to the vet, and they're like, for some reason, he's like bleeding pick him up. He couldn't even get himself up. And so we take him to the vet, and they're like, for some reason, he's bleeding into a stomach.
Starting point is 00:55:09 We don't really know what's going on. We can give him an infusion. We'll see how it goes. So we tried it. He got a little better, was able to get up by himself, but then three days later it was the same thing. Blood in his stomach,
Starting point is 00:55:21 and it turns out he had stomach cancer. And they could have like maybe done surgery. That would have been like 10 grand or something crazy. But it might not have even worked and it would have put him in so much pain. And so like we made the decision, which is so hard. But we decided to like let him go on a good day.
Starting point is 00:55:42 Don't put him through all that. Yeah. And my brother is like still like still really messed up about it. He's like, we should have done it. You know, bear would still be here. But to be an 11 year old German shepherd is actually like, it's good. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:57 Like, I literally, it was so fucked, though. I literally think someone jinxed it. My sister-in-law's dad came over and bear was outside, like running around the driveway as he like got out and whatever. And he's like, wow, you guys still have bear? And I'm like, yeah, yeah, he's doing great. Look at him. He was like living in Gallup, like a little German Shepherd Gallup.
Starting point is 00:56:19 And he looks at him and he goes, how old do German Shepherds live to? They don't live that long, only like 10, right? And I'm like, I looked it up after and I was like average German shepherd lifespan, nine to 13. And he's like, he literally like was like, wow, I'm surprised he's still kicking.
Starting point is 00:56:37 He said something like, always gonna be gone soon. And I'm like, what the fuck, dude? You don't say that to someone. Yeah. And sure enough, I'm like, you fucking jinxed my dog, bitch. I'm sure that's not the case, but I know that, but no, he's not, he's such a nice guy. Amy's dad is so so nice, but I was like, what the hell?
Starting point is 00:56:58 Why would you say that? And then of course, literally that week later, done. It literally felt like a James We actually couldn't My mom kept saying like we're we probably are gonna have to put down Oreo soon like We had my that was crazy. We got my dog when I was a baby like right when I was born They got my dog too and we grew up together like she died when I was 18 years old Yeah, and she was like she was like a mix of like a shelty,
Starting point is 00:57:26 like in a golden retriever. So she was like a pretty like decent sized dog. So 18 was actually crazy. And so for like a year, my mom would just be like, say give Oreo an extra hug, like we might have to put her down. And so by the time she actually died, like as sad as the sounds,
Starting point is 00:57:43 but like I was very like, okay. Prepared. Prepared. Yeah. And like we ended up not putting her down, like my mom kept thinking we should, but then she couldn't get herself to. She never really seemed like she was suffering.
Starting point is 00:57:56 She just had like some lumps on her, but she was dogs getting lumps too. Yeah, she was fine. She never looked like she was in pain. So like we ended up just keeping her until she, I woke up to go to school one morning and I was in the kitchen and she was alive the night before and then that morning when I saw she looked
Starting point is 00:58:12 a little bit more still and I went down and touched her and saw that she was gone. And that's like really, that's kind of traumatic. Yeah. It's really as hard. It's so hard with animals. Like when my little pony goes, I'm gonna be a wreck. He's like, he's family.
Starting point is 00:58:29 I've had him since I was like five. So it's really sad. So I definitely, like, we get where this is going. And it's hard to make this decision, but you can't make your family homeless. Like, where are they gonna go? And also, like, do you know how? You know how?
Starting point is 00:58:48 Exactly. These kids have to go to school. They need a safe environment. Like, and you know how hard it is to get a house? Like, yeah. The average person cannot attain a home. The fact you have this home, and you're unemployed. Like, this is just a total case of bad events.
Starting point is 00:59:05 Like, this is kind of like a when it rains at pores. And he just like really, really needs to put his family first in this moment and it sucks. This really sucks. But yeah, this is definitely deep rooted. Yeah. Deep rooted. Does she have any updates? I'll read the top comment and then see if there's any other things. Top comment is not the asshole. Your husband doesn't realize it, but he is slowly sacrificing his family for his dog. It is not anymore the family making some sacrifices, but really sacrificing the family. Also, your husband probably needs some mental help.
Starting point is 00:59:42 Yep. Yeah. Let's see if there's any comments. Someone goes, you're the asshole for not having pet insurance, which pet insurance can be very good. You need to get it right away so they can't say, oh no, we're not covering that. That's a pre-existing condition. Oh, wait, you can't get pet insurance later into having the pet. You can, but like, so Austin's dog June, like she has that like funky like Twitch on one arm.
Starting point is 01:00:09 So if she has any health issues like with that Twitch, he got health insurance after the vet had documented that like Twitchy arm. So if anything ever relates to that arm and the Twitch or Neuro, they're gonna not pay for it because they're gonna say that's a preexisting condition. Yeah, but hate churns. But his, I was talking about pet insurance
Starting point is 01:00:31 because I've heard mixed things, I've heard it doesn't pay. I've heard people love it. Yes, I was talking about it to him. And she is the most accident prone, like gets bopped up little dog. She tears her pop pads running too hard because she's a border call. She loves the ball. She had a tooth get infected and needed to get that pulled. And the
Starting point is 01:00:50 pet insurance has paid for all that. I guess there is an, I say 11 hate insurance is because it's so it saves lives obviously. It's so important to have. It's more just frustrating. Like, why can't they still get petting? Why can't they get insurance over the entire dog if he paid out of pocket for whatever went on with her foot. And then later on, if something else happens to her foot, like he is paying for insurance now, I guess I don't know if pet insurance works, but like that just seems like funky to me. It is interesting. No, but the insurance did pay for the foot and tooth. Oh, yeah, it just won't pay for the arm.
Starting point is 01:01:26 Yeah, that's what I mean. What do you call dogs arms? Okay, are you saying? But that's what I don't understand. So if something more happens, the like, it's even more messed up. But now he has insurance and they won't cover it anymore, I don't understand. Because it was a pre-existing condition. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:01:47 It's confusing. Yeah. Also, this dog is eight years old. Pet insurance wasn't really talked about eight years ago. Yeah. At least in my circle. Yeah. I feel like it's just become very like household name.
Starting point is 01:02:02 You know what I mean? Yeah. Also, one of the things I suggested to him along with Spain You know what I mean? Yeah. Also, one of the things I suggested him along with Spain her when I met him. And again, one of the things he ignored and didn't do. Dude, I would have a hard time being married to this person. Yeah, I was gonna say he sounds kind of like a stubborn asshole. Yeah, that's a good way to put it.
Starting point is 01:02:22 Next comment, everyone sucks here. Your husband for not spaying his fucking dog, which could have prevented this, spaying and neutering prevents a number of cancers and dangerous health conditions. Whoa. And you are telling him he can't sell his own car. Also, chemo is not that expensive.
Starting point is 01:02:39 I doubt it'll come to selling your house. Or I don't know, he could get a goddamn job to pay for it instead of waiting for government assistance. It's not the dog's fault you guys can't pull your shit together. He's right in that a mammary tumor is generally quite treatable and not terminal. And Opie goes, I never said he couldn't sell the car. He can sell his car, but he said he'll sell the car and use mine and drive me back and forth to work since he'll need the car. The answer to that was no. The house I refused to have himself.
Starting point is 01:03:11 That's crazy. Yeah. Oh, he just have another comment here. Like he saw me put my 14 year old cat down in April because he had cancer and no one knew about it. And he was in horrible shape. He left the room while I stayed the entire time. I would never put my animals through pain just to have six more months with them,
Starting point is 01:03:30 especially at a high cost to them and me financially. He also said he wouldn't stay in the room with his dog if he needs to put her down. I will stay with her though. Which that is so shitty. I'm like gonna get a little dark here. I don't know, I've heard people doing both. But your animal knows what's happening.
Starting point is 01:03:51 Like my horse that we had to put down, it took three extra doses, because he was just like fighting it. Like they fucking know and they're scared and they need you. And if you can't handle that responsibility of giving them that dignity and support and grace at the end of their life, you shouldn't get a fucking animal.
Starting point is 01:04:09 Like they need you. You're their person. You fucking, you can't sit there with them. Fuck you. Fuck you. Yeah, spare your animals, you guys. Spare your animals. I've also heard though that like if you wait until like especially for big dogs like German
Starting point is 01:04:30 choppers, you're supposed to wait until they hit a year and like really develop and then you should neuter them. Because that's better for their health. So I hear. But moving along, moving along. This is, this is wild, dude. Just fucking life can be so unfair. I hate like all the financial troubles people are in.
Starting point is 01:04:55 Like housing crisis, food being crazy, inflation, just like it makes me so sad that we're in the state of things we are in. I just want like everyone to have free healthcare. I want kids at schools to get free lunches. I just want like everyone to be happy and healthy and fed and fulfilled. It's the me's me. Am I a communist?
Starting point is 01:05:22 Am I a soul? What does that make me? What am I? Another one of this week's partners is pretty litter. Am I a communist? What does that make me? What am I? Another one of this week's partners is Pretty Little. Lauren has been fostering a lot of kittens and cats lately, and so I gave my Pretty Little to her. And one thing about fostering is you never really know what condition the cats are in when you're getting them.
Starting point is 01:05:39 And you wanna make sure these little kiddies are happy and healthy before they go on to their forever home, which is why Pretty Littleitter is so amazing. PrettyLitter actually changes color to help monitor early signs of potential illness in your cat, including urinary tract infections and kidney issues. And Lauren has also been fostering in a smaller apartment, and PrettyLitter has ultra-absorbit crystals that trap odor instantly. So when I went and visited their apartment, I could not even tell.
Starting point is 01:06:07 They had multiple cats there. It also has a super lightweight crystal base, which minimizes mess and dust, and the crystals last up to a month, which means less scooping and less trips to the garbage can. And the best part, Pretty Little ships right to your door in a small lightweight bag. So if you want to try for yourself, Prettyitter helps keeps tabs on our cat's health and keeps odour down. You and your cat are going to love PrettyLitter as much as we do. Go to PrettyLitter.com slash THT and use code THT to save 20% on your first order. That's PrettyLitter.com slash TH THT code THT to save 20% pretty litter.com slash
Starting point is 01:06:48 THT code THT terms and conditions apply seaside for details. Trigger warning on this next one you guys it does contain talks of sexual assault. Okay, up next this one is coming from the two hot takes subreddit, it's 22 hours old. I don't even know what to make of this. It is titled, I found out my female 38 husband male 37 is taking pictures and using me while I sleep. If this breaks any rules, just ignore this. At the title says, my husband has been touching me in my sleep and recording it. For context, I take a handful of pills every day for medical reasons. They make me extremely drowsy, and when I'm asleep, I stay asleep. I'm very sex repulsed and I hate it, but sometimes I'll just let him have his way because I don't
Starting point is 01:07:38 want to make him frustrated or upset. I just found out today when getting ready for work, he was sleeping and I couldn't find my phone. So I was going to use his to call mine. I tapped the screen and it opened up to his photos and there was a recent video of him fingering me while I was sleeping. It's so repulsive. There were photos and videos of him touching me, fucking me, fingering me, spitting on me,
Starting point is 01:08:02 and nutting on me. I was in fucking shock and I just looked on in disbelief. The date of the photo shows this has been happening for more than a year. What do I do? I didn't confront him, I just went to work. I called him to go back to his apartment today, because I didn't want to see him.
Starting point is 01:08:20 I felt violated and gross the entire day. I vomited at work, I was so sick to my stomach. I just got home and I didn't know what to do. My husband is back at his place, but it hasn't called or texted. I just, I don't know what to do. I just need some advice. Oh my fucking God, that is repulsive.
Starting point is 01:08:41 It is completely sexual assault, sexual abuse. I don't care if you're married. That is so fucked up, like beyond belief. Wow. I feel disgusted too. Like I want to throw up with her. I didn't, I didn't read this one. I didn't realize it was that bad.
Starting point is 01:08:58 I thought like so bad. I thought I was just taking like pictures of earner sleep. I thought it was gonna be like the white whale. Yeah, yeah. I like don was gonna be the white whale. Sorry. Yeah. I like don't have any words except divorce. Oh, like immediately that is so sick, Neen. You can't do that. But also I'm kinda confused when she says she's sex for polls.
Starting point is 01:09:14 Does that mean that she, they don't, like they never have sex then when she's awake? I can see consenting. Well, I could see her being like asexual where she doesn't like, she doesn't crave sex, doesn't, right, you know, asexual can look a little different for every asexual person. I wonder if that's like a conversation that they had
Starting point is 01:09:32 that he was like, you know, I'm fine with how it's sex too or like how they would think so if they're married. Right. That's so interesting. But also being like, oh well, sometimes I let him have his way because like whatever, but it's like, but you don't have to do that. Like there's definitely people out there
Starting point is 01:09:46 that would like align better with you. Yeah, definitely. Find another person that's more asexual. No, you should never have to have sex if you don't want to. Wow. I'm at a loss. I'm at a total loss here. I'm so disgusted.
Starting point is 01:10:03 I feel so bad for her holy shit. It's really bad. The top comment on this. Yeah, if you didn't consent, that's rape. Yeah. This is horrific. Not a single thing of what he did is borderline okay, instant divorce, take the pictures, et cetera, and go to the police, too. Literally. Yeah. There is an update from OP. I'm going to find a lawyer and talk to and see what I can do to divorce him. The next time I have access to his phone, I'll send as many photos and videos to myself
Starting point is 01:10:37 as I can. I'm scared to call the cops, but I'm hoping the lawyer can help me with that. I also see there was a lot of confusion with a lot of things to clear up. So here's more context, having different places. I was still on the fence about moving in together. He also never entertained the idea of living together whenever brought up. So I didn't want to waste my breath time
Starting point is 01:10:56 and money on something we wouldn't enjoy. Wait, I'm sorry, what? Because she mentioned like, can you go back to your apartment or your place or whatever? Okay. And so everyone's like, wait, your husband, can you go back to your apartment or your place or whatever? Okay. And so everyone's like, wait, your husband, but yet you have separate places, like, so she's just like kind of explaining that. And then someone goes, or she also goes, day old account.
Starting point is 01:11:16 I thought it was obvious. This was a throw away, but I should have mentioned it in the beginning. That's my bad. No comments. I took my meds and went to bed almost immediately after posting. I didn't really want to acknowledge this that it was happening to me.
Starting point is 01:11:29 And I'm also just at a loss for words. I didn't know what to say. Me either, girlie, me either. This is a really hard one. And I am so, so glad she's pursuing divorce and like handling this in the right way. Yeah, this is so beyond, okay, it's, it truly is. That's, it's right. Yeah. It's really bad. Moving along. Because we can't end on that. No, that was like, oh, that shook me
Starting point is 01:12:00 in a really bad way. Yeah. Okay, let's end on something a little better. Yeah. Do you want to talk about food? I'm like really hungry. We can talk about food. Okay. Okay. So this one is two months old.
Starting point is 01:12:16 It's titled, Am I the asshole for not eating food? My girlfriend's parents made at family dinner. My girlfriend of four years has a different cultural background than mine. Her parents are not from America, and family and meals are very important to them. I grew up in America, and while we had holiday dinners and maybe a Sunday dinner every couple of weeks, for the most part, mom or dad made something, and then we eat it where, and when we wanted.
Starting point is 01:12:40 I eat dinner with my girlfriend's parents every week, and I love it. It is important to her, and I have no problem with the different cuisines. It's all delicious food. However, I do not eat a lot. Growing up, I was very overweight and saw a nutritionist. Stuck to a calorie deficit and worked on my portions, and I've been at a healthy weight ever since. My relationship with food has changed and I no longer have the desire to tear through two double-quarter pounders anymore. My girlfriend's parents seem to get offended that I get small portions of things and
Starting point is 01:13:10 don't fill my plate up a second time. They will make maybe five to six different food options, and I'll get a little bit of everything because I want to taste it all. At some point, every time I'm there, they ask me if I didn't like the food. They mention the small portions and how I never go back for more. I just honestly tell them I don't want to overeat. They never made a scene about it to me, but I guess they've been discussing it with my girlfriend while I am not there. A couple of days ago, my girlfriend told me that her parents feel offended over how little I eat,
Starting point is 01:13:41 which, a little, is a 100% full plate with a bit of everything made. And some days I eat less and some days I eat more. It really just depends. If I skipped breakfast and had a late lunch, I might fill up more for dinner. But if for example, I had a decent breakfast, work catered sandwiches that day, I'm going to get a normal, small, sized dinner. My general goal is to have equal sized meals each time, but with a busy work life that is not always possible.
Starting point is 01:14:10 So some days I didn't really have food until family dinner, and I'm eating more than usual. My girlfriend asked me if it was possible that I could eat a little bit more just for one day of the week. She didn't push her to ban, just asking if it was possible. I told her that I don't want to ruin my mended relationship with food. I don't understand why the parents are so offended. I always pack up top or wear and eat it throughout the week because it's
Starting point is 01:14:33 delicious food. I don't want to disrespect her parents though. That's so ridiculous. I cannot stand that. Like, no one should ever be policing what somebody else is eating unless they're in a serious health issue. And it's like somebody that's your mentor or whatever, but other than that, buzz the fuck off. Like that is so ridiculous. Ugh.
Starting point is 01:15:01 I can't, especially when I, because I know that feeling too sorry, like to know your gut. But I, because I know that feeling too, sorry, like to, no, you're good, but no, because I've told this before, but like when I was in college, I literally ate like McDonald's every day, and I thought it was healthy because I was like, oh, I'm getting like a, just like a chicken sandwich and chicken's healthy.
Starting point is 01:15:18 Yeah, it's snack wrap, like I'm so snack wrap. Totally fine. And so anyway, I just didn't understand food health at all. And I was so proud of myself when I moved here. And I started eating really healthy. And then I had somebody that was like monitoring what I was eating and was like judging me and was just like, that's all you're gonna eat.
Starting point is 01:15:37 You're only gonna have a salad. And I'm like, I'm so proud of myself. And happy with my relationship with food now. Now I know what makes me feel good and energized because I used to just be like a slump after I would eat and then it was like, and so to have somebody like breathing down your whatever the phrase is, yeah, is just so frustrating and especially since like he's saying that he didn't have a good relationship with food and now he does, it's like he should not have to like, like, change that just to please anybody else and his girlfriend needs to talk to her parents and set them straight. I agree and it is hard because I have someone in my life that has an eating disorder and it is really hard when you do see what someone's
Starting point is 01:16:26 putting on their plate and you're like, if this is all you're eating, that's not enough for you. So it is this fine line of like, do I interject because I'm worried about them? Or do I mind my own business because what someone's eating is not my concern? But it is really hard if someone does have an eating disorder. It is, you worry.
Starting point is 01:16:46 We all worry about people in our life. So it is a hard line to walk. And even I recently learned telling that person, oh my god, you look way too skinny. This is not healthy. You should never say that to someone with an eating disorder because it actually confirms in their head what I'm doing is working. I look skinny. So you think I'm skinny. Like it confirms everything they've done and it makes it worse. So don't make those comments to people. If you're worried about them, just say that,
Starting point is 01:17:17 hey, I'm worried about you. Exactly. That's it. That is. Yeah. There's no comments. You're getting too skinny. Are you eating enough? Right. Just I am worried about you Yeah, a hundred percent and that's why I said to in the beginning I was just like you should never have something to comment about somebody like they're eating habits and less like you're worried about their He's slashing you. Yeah, unless you're worried about their health and even so, it should come from somebody that is like I said, like a professional? Yeah, or someone like very, very close to them. Not like his girlfriend's parents
Starting point is 01:17:52 who are just offended because they like, you know what I mean? Yeah. So that, to me, doesn't sound like they're worried about his health. It sounds to me like they're just being ridiculous. Well, and I get the cultural stuff. Like you hear that a lot. Like, do they say which culture?
Starting point is 01:18:06 I'm sorry if I'm missing. It wasn't mentioned just that they're from a different cultural background and they're not from America. Okay. I'm not sure if there's any comments that elaborate on it. But I have heard that in many, many cultures, you think Hispanic families,
Starting point is 01:18:19 like Hispanic moms. I feel like Greek too. I mean, there's so many of them. Like so many cultures are very heavily centered around food. Yeah, and who doesn't love food? Like that would be a different thing if like he Just never ate their food. That's what I mean. Well, and also when he started to describe like His small plate It's still a full plate.
Starting point is 01:18:45 It's a full entire plate of food with every kind of food they're offering. So I don't understand why they think he's like being rude or not eating. I mean, I know by some standards a full plate means it's like heaping like it gains height. So like maybe they're definition of full, like, no, you load it up and it should be stacked.
Starting point is 01:19:05 It's just ridiculous though. But one of my thoughts was going to be like, well, bring Tupperware and like, bring your ass to take seconds home with you. Like, hey, I'm really full right now, but I'm going to love this later. And that was going to be my suggestion. Yeah. But he got to that. He's already taking seconds home. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:19:22 So it's like, what where's the issue? Like where is this really stemming from? Weird. Weird, weird. I don't know, I don't get it. I really don't get it. Is there any updates? There's not an update yet, but there is some comments.
Starting point is 01:19:38 Someone goes, sounds like something Caribbean or Indian people would do, not the asshole, but it is also a part of their culture. To be honest, I know it's irrational, but it makes me so happy when my guests eat all my food and ask for more. I am also offended when people refuse my food, but you are most definitely not the asshole. It's just a cultural difference, do what's best for you. And OP goes, the thing is, I'm not refusing.
Starting point is 01:20:00 I've eaten every food item they've ever made. I'm not a big fan of fish, but I eat a serving of any fish-related dish when they have it. How old is this couple again? No ages are mentioned, and it's a girlfriend of four years. So it's like they've been together quite some time.
Starting point is 01:20:20 Yeah. And honestly, this is the most, this is a great boyfriend. Like, this is a great boyfriend. He's coming over, dude, I wouldn't eat fish. Yeah. I wouldn't be able to do it. Like, I can't eat something I don't like.
Starting point is 01:20:33 And he's even eating, she doesn't like. Right. And then you have these other stories on Reddit where someone's like, am I the asshole for telling my girlfriend not to cook her smelly Indian food? And then he goes on to tell this story. My girlfriend's Indian. And she cooks Indian food. And then he goes on to tell this story. My girlfriend's Indian and she cooks Indian food and it stinks up our apartment.
Starting point is 01:20:48 Buh, blah, blah, blah, blah. Like whatever it is. And it's like, you have that asshole. Which the smell of Indian food, God, I would take some chicken. I love it. Chicken teacum masala. Oh my God, Brian is making yellow curry with his like crock pot right now.
Starting point is 01:21:02 And I'm so excited. I love Indian food. I love fucking Mediterranean food. I take some Kava. I'll take some Mexican food. I could swim in yellow curry. Like it's like my favorite food. Thai food, I could swim in some like,
Starting point is 01:21:14 oh yeah, we had the best Thai food in here in Thailand. We never talk about our Thailand trip anymore. I thought about that because you brought it up yesterday and I was like, that happened. I want to go back. It's so beautiful. Well, I'm going to Yeah, that happened. I want to go back. Yeah, it's so beautiful. Well, I'm going to the Philippines soon.
Starting point is 01:21:27 Oh, I want to go there too. As a very like kind of similar area vibe. Yeah, that's going to be an amazing trip. Oh, I'm so excited. It'll be really cool because your brother's wife is from there. And like, they haven't met your niece yet, right? Her family? Like her mom probably has. That's it? Good question. I don't know. I'm sure she's meeting a lot of people now. Well, and might be amazing. My brothers never been, and
Starting point is 01:21:55 they've always wanted her to go or always wanted him to go. And she's turning one. And so it's funny because I'm like, I'm going to the Philippines for my niece's first birthday. And people are like, oh god, like roll their eyes. Kind of like reaction. Look at that. No more so because they just think it's very extravagant. And I'm like, no, no, no, don't worry. It's not like we don't just like go big
Starting point is 01:22:13 for first birthdays like that. It's, she's from there. Yeah, her mom's from there. So. Oh, I thought Geraldine was born there too. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Oh, okay. Oh, I meant she's from there.
Starting point is 01:22:24 Like I went, Gwyneth and then I was like, sorry, her mom. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Oh, okay. Sorry, I meant she's from there. Oh, cool. Like I meant Gwyneth and then I was like, sorry, her mom. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, wait a minute. Okay. Yeah, so I don't know. I just think like, I think these people,
Starting point is 01:22:34 maybe they had like food insecurity. Like when they were growing up in whatever country they came from, like maybe they have some deep rooted trauma surrounding food. So it's like the fact that they have it and their ability to offer it now. I feel like it's just passed down. That's what it sounds like to me,
Starting point is 01:22:49 like culturally passed down where it's like, they couldn't go play unless they ate this amount of food on their plate every single day growing up from their parents. And so then now they're just like, wait, this is how the world works. Wow, you know, he does elaborate too. And someone deleted their comments, so I can't see what it was, but they were making comments about like what he was eating, and Opie goes, not small.
Starting point is 01:23:14 Literally a normal amount. I said small in comparison to what they expect. I eat dinner at their house and fill my plate up with everything. Imagine if someone expected you to eat three large rib-eye steaks and three serving of mashed potatoes every dinner. Yeah. I would tell you. It's funny too because when I came over yesterday to the barbecue, I had already eaten. I know. I'm not. Because I am telling you, because I go back and forth to Orange County so often, I throw money away from the grocery store. I buy food and then I just let it all go to waste.
Starting point is 01:23:47 It's so frustrating to me. I just had so much fresh food that I was like, I'm going to eat this fresh food that I'm going to do it. I'm going to stick to it. That's good. But I did end up eating later in the night, but right when I got there, I was just like, I can't do it. I can't do it.
Starting point is 01:24:03 Yeah, there is a little bit of an edit. Another odd thing I wanna add, they will make comments about my girlfriend, who is in great shape, that she is, quote, putting on weight sometimes, but also pressure her to fill her plate twice. I don't get it. Got it.
Starting point is 01:24:17 Got it. There's another edit. I know you mean well, but the idea of pretending to eat or getting a small plate and going back to get another small plate is just so silly to me. I get that all cultures are different. I eat all the different food they serve and follow the religious codes when I am in their house.
Starting point is 01:24:33 But the idea of taking someone's autonomy and having to fake like I am getting more seconds is just so ridiculous to me. Yeah. Also, it didn't know so many people would relate to being force fed and then scolded for being overweight. As a Midwest American, I've never experienced this. Sounds very toxic that so many people can relate to that and the mental issues I had as a severely obese kid and teen.
Starting point is 01:24:54 If my parents behaved in that way, it would have fucked my relationship with food up even more. But I guess nothing says showing love to someone like fattening them up and then scolding them for the natural weight gain you caused. Wild. I think this needs to be a bigger conversation between him and his girlfriend. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:25:11 Because if they plan and the parents, like he needs to sit down with them too and be like, listen, I appreciate and love this food so much. And XYZ. Yeah. I think that's really smart. But her first, maybe let her have that conversation, but I don't know if she's even got the strength to,
Starting point is 01:25:29 because if my mom did that, yeah. If my mom made me eat two big plates of food, and then said I was fat, I would be like, you're fat. Fuck you. I'd be so mad. Morgan really just played that out in her head and like, and I was like, you guys should have seen her face.
Starting point is 01:25:49 She just instantly got pissed. She's like, are you kidding me, Mom? Like as if it really just happened. Like you did this to me. You did this to me. Also like, I'm happy and healthy. I love my food. Like fuck you.
Starting point is 01:25:59 So no, I definitely think this is a bigger, deeper rooted problem. And something to really think about because if they choose to be together, if they choose to have kids, their kids could be affected by this. This type of behavior could cause their kids to develop and eating disorder. Yeah. And it's also just like outside of the food and health and whatever, it is mentally, like fucks with your, like, mental health.
Starting point is 01:26:25 Yeah. And I, and I feel that way because like, I remember feeling so horrible that I was so excited about my good relationship. And then somebody that I care about so much, like, made me feel like I was doing something wrong. Like it fucked with my head, you know what I mean? And not that long, not that deep, but like, this over the years, like, that's going to fuck with your, your like mental health. It just is. For sure. And it's hard because like they're coming from a good place. I'm sure the
Starting point is 01:26:52 person like with you, like people just worry, like I'm sure that was coming from a good place. But again, it's like one of those things where it's like it could be coming from a good place, but it doesn't make it right, and it needs to be addressed. No, because later on, like that person was telling me like that she just has insecurities around food. So if she sees other people eating better, or like more healthy than her,
Starting point is 01:27:16 then it makes her feel guilty about what she's eating. And so she tells me what I'm doing is wrong. Dude, that's me. Then it makes her feel like what she's doing is right. I, yeah, that makes total sense. And something I can doing is wrong. Dude, that's mean. Then it makes her feel like what she's doing is right. You know? Yeah. That makes total sense and something I can really relate to. It's also why, like, and it's kind of become more wide known because of TikTok and people
Starting point is 01:27:33 making, like, skits about it. But it's like, if I'm craving a donut. Oh, right. And I'm like, I would love a donut. I'm like, Justin, should we go get donuts? And he's like, no, I'm good. I'm like, yeah. You almost like, you can't give yourself permission to have that thing
Starting point is 01:27:46 unless someone's like, right, partaking in it with you. I really struggle with that. I really struggle with that. Cause I always crave sweet treats. Oh, yeah. Oh my God, the sweet treats last night were so good. I know, I forgot the bunks at Justin's,
Starting point is 01:28:01 and I'm like, I gotta run, well, I can have him grab him. But it's all I'm thinking about right now. I'm so hungry. You know, all I'm thinking about is that I have this really long hair right here. And on your chin. Yeah, no, no, no, I'm right here on my neck. Do you see it?
Starting point is 01:28:12 No. Wait a minute, let me try to grab it. Oh, it is long. Yeah, so long. Wow. Does that ever happen to you? Just like one, I get them on my chin. I can't.
Starting point is 01:28:22 I can't. Random long hair out of like somewhere that doesn't get any hair. Like, I have one on my arm that will just grow like one I get them on really random long hair out of like somewhere that doesn't get any Here like I have one of my arm that will just grow like only like three inches on my arm. Yeah, this one I was looking at it last night. I'm like, oh my god. This arm one's getting way longer than the others Yeah, I always pluck them. I really want to get this one right now. Oh here does wait I don't know if you're gonna be able to get it This is such a nice tangent for people to listen to.
Starting point is 01:28:46 Oh, God, okay. Lauren, plucking her neck hair, fuck ASMR. Yeah, right. Whatever. I don't think I read the top comment on this one. So I'll read that while you try to pluck your chin, hair, neck hair. So the top comment on this one is not the asshole. My extended family is this way culturally, and it is considered offensive to them
Starting point is 01:29:06 if you reject food, slash don't gorge yourself. But culture can't be prioritized over your boundaries and well-being. This is a good compatibility test for you and your girlfriend. It will be uncomfortable for her, but I hope she chooses to back you up. Yeah, this will work out.
Starting point is 01:29:22 This will be good. Okay, cool. It's all I got. Nice. That This will be good. Okay. It's all I got. Nice. That is a good one. Yeah. It's a fun time. Yeah. Low, low key, deep problems, but no poop or incest.
Starting point is 01:29:34 Wow. Yeah. Love it. I'm healed, guys. Don't worry. But there's so much good stuff on Patreon this month. So if you are looking for more content, that's like like this kind of our bread and butter,
Starting point is 01:29:49 crazy stories, there's a lot of it on Patreon. And one that's free. So if you head over there and subscribe, you'll get access to some free stories as well. Nice. Nice. Can I see the whole thing? What?
Starting point is 01:30:03 Nothing. It's a quote. It's really bad quote. That? Nothing. It was a quote. It's really bad quote. It's fine. What was the quote? Oh my God, it's so dumb when I was little. So these girls were telling me how this guy was texting them. It was little, I mean like 13, whatever.
Starting point is 01:30:18 This guy was texting them and was like, can I see your boob? And so they were with one of their guy friends and they took a picture of just his nipple to like fuck with the other guy and sent it to him and he goes, nice, nice. Can I see the whole thing? And like for like on end, like months on end, like we would just randomly, anytime we'd say nice, we'd be like nice, nice.
Starting point is 01:30:42 Can I see the whole thing? I like that, okay. How would I have known? You like, I know that's why I'm like, we would, nice. Can I say the whole thing? I like that, okay. How would I have known? You like, I know that's why I'm like, we ride. That's why I'm saying I was just in my own world and I was like, oh fuck, I just said that out loud. And then now if you, I'm like, do I just pretend I didn't say it or do I explain the story?
Starting point is 01:30:56 Yeah, no, that was a good story. Now you know. That was a really good story. Yeah. Oh, there's one more I wanna read, but we're not doing it. I'm gonna read it with someone fuck. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You gotta get read, but we're not doing it. I'm going to read it with someone. Fuck.
Starting point is 01:31:06 No, no, no. Okay. No, no, no. You got to get on the road. Yeah, I do. Florence driving in Newport. Yeah, it gets really bad around this time. Yeah, you got to, you got to roll, hit the road, try to go.
Starting point is 01:31:15 And don't you come back. No, no, no, no, no. But I really want to know the story now. Okay, I'll give everyone a teaser of the title. It does contain talks of miscarriage, and it's titled, Am I the asshole for calling the seaword to my future sister-in-law after she tried to gain sympathy with my miscarriage? Ooh, it's got some tea there, for sure. Any other themes we should have later? What do
Starting point is 01:31:42 you want to do next? I'll let you think about it. Okay. Okay. Thank you. If you guys have an idea for a theme, head over to Spotify. There will be a question posted where you can fill it out. And I'm sure there's going to be a poll for this story for this week's stories, which one? I don't know. We'll also think about that. But it's going to be juicy. You know what, I feel bad about. I feel like I didn't go hard enough in my initial reaction about the girl who made that comment about her friend getting pregnant. I don't think we realized the gravity of it. I know. And then when you really hash it, your like three years, that's what got me messed up
Starting point is 01:32:25 because I thought about three years. Right. And whenever someone tells me a time span, I always try to think of like, okay, like you struggled with something for two years. I'm like, what is it an experience I had for two years? Yeah. Okay, this. And then I'm like, right, like, I need like a concept of the time.
Starting point is 01:32:41 You know what I mean? For sure. Otherwise, I can't like conceptualize it. Well, no, it didn't like hit me. You know, it was that first I was just like, oh, I mean, yeah, she's the asshole, but I always feel bad when people are genuinely trying to like make a lighthearted joke
Starting point is 01:32:53 and then fail so badly. I just feel like bad for them. You know, you cringe. Yeah, and I'm like, oh God, like you wouldn't hit. We're trying to be mean. You just genuinely like flop so fucking hard. Yeah. And then when I thought about the three-year thing, I was like, oh, fuck.
Starting point is 01:33:07 That really, that's an added knife for sure. Oh, okay, well enough chit-chat. I love chit-chat. You got to drive. Okay, I love you. If you're not following or subscribed, please do that. But other than that, until next time. Until next time, until next time, bye! you

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.