Two Hot Takes - 149: Frothing at the Mouth.. Ft. Michaela Okland & Ellie Schnitt

Episode Date: January 18, 2024

WE'RE GOING ON TOUR!!! NEW SHOWS ADDED & TICKETS HERE: https://linktr.ee/twohottakestour Two Hot Takes host, Morgan, is joined by guest co-hosts Ellie Schnitt & Michaela Okland!! This weeks episode has us getting a little bothered, a little frothy at the mouth, over what these stories are about. From being asked to help someone one week postpartum to your friend dropping a bomb on you two weeks before your wedding.. we had some big feelings. Thoughts on these ones?! Checkout Ellie & Michaela's podcast: https://www.instagram.com/latenightdrivepod/ https://open.spotify.com/show/0DocACQlT5rmdAVR1T0rEu MERCH IS HERE! https://shop.twohottakes.com I can't wait to see you all in these, especially at our live shows!! Our PO Box!! Two Hot Takes. 5042 Wilshire BLVD. #470. Los Angeles, CA 90036 Bonus Content on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/TwoHotTakes Our SubReddit to Submit YOUR Stories!!! https://reddit.app.link/twohottakes Full length Video episodes available on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/TwoHotTakes Partners: Zocdoc: Zocdoc.com/THT HelloFresh: HelloFresh.com/thtfree Promo code: thtfree ! Heineken: https://bit.ly/TwoHotTakes00

Are we ready girls? I, I, Captain. Oh my god, you guys are quick with it. Holy smokey. Oh yeah, you do. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I. We're done. I'm ready. Michaela, you were going to start off the show today with a song, right? Oh, yeah, yeah. Two hot takes. We got two hot takes. You take two takes in their hot out of the oven and you take them to a woo. That was amazing. I don't know. I think people are going to start

petitioning for that to be our theme song or close their second. Give me a little tour. You're going to take her on tour. I'm just for that. I'm just really just for that. Don't tell me we're taking you on tour. I think people would really be down. Both of you.

Both of you. Which welcome back to another episode of Two Hot Takes You Guys. I'm your host Morgan. And today I'm joined by the lovely talented Ellie Schnitt and Michaela Oakley. Hi. Hi. Bye, bye, bye, bye.

That's my DJ. That was really good, actually. That was so important. That was really important. We should put our songs together and be like, can you do me? We should have mixed them together. Oh my God, people would lose their minds.

We were talking about this last night, and I'm like so nervous. I don't know why. I'm just like, I'm so excited for this. I just can't contain my nerves. But, Michaela, you were like the first guest I ever had on this podcast. I can't believe that.

Like the first, like different guests. Yeah. Like first person that wasn't family or friends. It was so long ago. It was like two years ago. I don't know if any of you remember, but I've been around. You're no G. And OG. I mean, you had the beetle guy story. Oh my god, the beetle guy story. I think I like recently got a damn about that. Yeah. Like I think after

that episode came out, people like did find him or thought they did. I don't know. The play. I don't know if the play ever happened because I would periodically check for it and it never, I never saw tickets for it. So I don't know what happened. Just in case anyone's uninitiated, there was a man who was method acting to play a beetle and his home and his wife was upset about it. Yeah, yeah. I'm really, today's story is, they might rival it.

They might. It's tough, it's really tough. Oh man. So today's theme that I have for you guys They might rival it. They might. It's tough. It's really tough. Oh man. So today's theme that I have for you guys is frothing at the mouth. Okay. We often do.

Some say foam. I like froth. I slip up. I mess up sayings all the time. And I just think froth has a better ring to it. It's a kind of better mouth feel. Yeah. When you said that,

it didn't even register that it's normally filming at the mouth. But, froth is a nice word. I know. Well, it makes you think of like a latte. Yeah. I like it. So, it's stories that are just going to really get us heated. I think you guys will have just expert takes.

It's going to be good. Where experts are getting mad, I'll tell you that. Then let's go. Okay, so up first, we have one that's coming from our very own two hot takes subreddit. This one is titled, My Girlfriend Got Hurt at Brazilian Jujitsu. I feel terrible, but don't think it was on purpose. She's mad at me. Lee women. I mean, was on purpose. She's mad at me. Believe women.

I mean, already I'm mad. I started taking Brazilian Jiu Jitsu in 2021 as a way to get into better shape after lockdowns. I had joined a regular gym and I also started going to Jiu Jitsu Academy on the advice of my cousin, who had started going to one. He lives in another province, however,

he was able to recommend one where I live. I'm only a blue belt, but I really enjoy it. I started dating my girlfriend last year, and I thought Brazilian Jiu Jitsu was something we could do together. She was reluctant, but I got her to come observe me a few times. She was still reluctant. Then she told me about a woman only class for beginners at a different academy. We have had women before, but they always drop out and stop coming after a while. I didn't think the women's only class was a good idea, plus the idea was for us to do something together, so I did convince her to join

my academy. In that time she went with me every time she wasn't working on the same evening's eye was free and was going to the academy. She never went alone though. A few times she complained to me that the others at the academy were rough, but it's a contact sport, and I convinced her to stay after she wanted to quit. Hmm. Last week I had to work a couple of days when she wasn't working. I tried to convince her to go without me. The first time she didn't, but the I tried to convince her to go without me. The first time

she didn't, but the second time I got her to go. She got hurt that time. She was rolling with a blue belt and he got her into an arm bar. She says he went right into it and didn't go slow or give her time to tap. She broke her arm. Left all-na near the elbow. He says he was just trying to show her how fast things happen in real life and didn't think her arm would break like that. She said the others should know because of the size and weight difference and he should not have done the arm bar that forceful or fast. I believe him that it was an accident. However, I feel terrible

for my girlfriend. I have only talked to her once since she got hurt. It was mostly her being upset and I didn't really get to say anything. We were talking about moving in together. Now she said she doesn't want to. She said the others at the Academy were rough and should have known not to go so hard because she's smaller than them. But it's a contact sport, and one of the purposes is self-defense. I do not like that she got hurt, but I also don't believe the blue belt or any of the other guys were rough on purpose. She won't talk to me, I don't even know what's going to happen with our relationship.

She said she has mad at herself for not quitting when she wanted to, but she has mad at me too. And our instructor. I don't know why she's mad at herself for not quitting when she wanted to but she has mad at me too and our instructor I don't know why she's mad at him. I feel awful that she got hurt But at the same time it's a contact sport and injuries can happen. I don't think it was on purpose or anything like that Can I ask a question? Is it a contact sport? I wasn't I can get the impression. Was it do you think it's contact? I think that it is impression, was it? Do you think it's contest? Does he think that it is? Also, is it Brazilian, Jujitsu? Brazilian. But it was regular kind, not Brazilian.

Hard to say. This man is exhausted. OK, so she never mind you. He's been barring the broken arm, never wanted to do Jujitsu. She was never interested in doing Jujitsu. I don't know why, to begin with, it was so important to him. Also, love the little nugget of like, women always leave our gym. What's up with that? It seems like there's a pattern here that he's not seeing. Yeah, I wonder why women leave the gym.

Clearly a pattern. I've taken self-defense classes and like safety is the number one thing. Like they're very, very careful. To break someone's arm takes a lot of force. It's very difficult to do that. That's not like a oops broke your arm. No, force. It's very difficult to do that. That's not like a oops broke your arm. No, I have like a visceral reaction to that. And she was even trying to give him a compromise where she was like, well, maybe I'll join one that's like women only, but no, no, no, no, no, of course not.

That's not what he wanted. It's control. And it's like the way he doesn't believe her. Yeah. He wasn't there. And he's giving some random random guy that he's not really connected with, the benefit of the doubt versus his partner, who he should be going to bat for. And who does it benefit when you just join a gym and you're learning to go against someone who's got way more training than you isn't slowing down to teach you anything, is just

like going at you to hurt you. How is that going to help anybody learn? Does anyone watch Friends? Have you guys seen Friends? I've seen it. It's been a while. It's giving Ross trying to jump out and scare Phoebe and Rachel to like teach them a lesson.

Like, Unagi. Like, yeah. And they're like, isn't that sushi? But it's like, I feel like a lot of times in life, guys will use their strength or something that they have, like as an advantage, air quotes, to teach us a lesson, to like prove we're inferior, to prove we're weaker, to prove they're smart or strong or faster, you know, whatever it is. And I feel like that's what this was.

Like, this was him trying to like assert dominance in some weird way. Well, I think it would be really, granted I've never done Brazilian jujitsu, but I think it would probably be really hard to break someone's arm unaccident. Like, I think it's probably a purposeful thing. You would have to know how much force you were gonna be putting on that person.

Yeah, according to Google, and obviously it can change with people that have like conditions like osteoporosis or weakened bones, whatever. 225 pounds of force to break an arm. Oh my God. Yeah. A thousand newtons if you wanna, if you're real smart.

And I don't know what that means, but that sounds like a lot. It sounds painful. I mean, even like football players aren't breaking their arms that often. That's just like a hefty. You would have to really be trying to do that. Yeah.

I feel like men with sports are very much like, if we were ever doing the same sport, like if I was even doing soccer against an Olympic soccer player, I would win, even though I don't practice soccer. And I feel like they have that little mindset. Did you see it? Okay. Why don't you?

Oh, yeah. It was a woman and she was like, what is she like a track star? Yeah. She's like really good at track and this guy with no training like couch potato was like, yeah, obviously I could beat you at track because I'm a man and you're a woman and I'm obviously faster than you. So she like did the race with him and she sort of kept pace with him, kind of played with him for the first half,

and then just shot out ahead of him so far. She smoked his ass. But still so many of the quotes we were like, well, he was keeping up with her, even though he doesn't even try to. She wasn't even trying to. She was like him. This is proof that men are actually more superior athletically. Like, oh, he could just roll off the couch and keep pace with her.

Yeah. She was doing that to fuck with him. Yeah. Oh, it's so hard being a woman. Like, there's such a barrier to entry with anything where it's like, even like professional women's basketball, you have all these guys that are like, well, you know, Zion in high school could have beat her even though she's the best woman. Like, oh, you like football?

10 players on the 1975 Eagles team. Like, it's like, can we just, can we not? Well, I feel like that's what a lot of the dudes defending Simone Biles' husband are saying. Like, why would he know the most famous woman athlete when it's like, any man could do that? Did you see his tweets that surfaced? No.

He was tweeting about those Olympics. He was, he was, he was a little liar. Of course he was. He was a little liar. He knew who she was. Of course he was. He was a little liar. She knew who she was. Of course he did. You're not dumb. And like, if you're on Raya or her Instagram

or whatever, the fuck way they met, you have eyes. You looked at her account. Like, come on. I get in the beginning of dating a super famous person being like, oh yeah, I'm not super familiar with your work, but to keep that rules through marriage, you're like, make a little joke. And be like, I never heard of you.

Not even once. Never heard your name. I'm the cat. It's like, why do you feel like you need to humble her? You know, like, why are you so insecure that you have to do that? And that is literally the story. That's what the Brazilian jujitsuers are doing. They're humbling her in the context.

And for what? For literally what? It's crazy. The top comment is, well, it's pretty obvious why women stopped coming to this place. Yeah. A immediate red flag that multiple women started coming and then stopped after a few classes. I wouldn't be surprised if the reason

that there's no women gym that exists now in the same area is because of this one. It's all people from that gym who've left that gym. Yeah, they might read it. What is the instructor teaching them? I'm also wondering if the men there don't want her to be there. Like I'm wondering if they're actually welcoming or if the boyfriend's the only one who really wants her

to be showing up. I feel like that's probably. Yeah, I also think it is interesting that he was like, I thought this was something we could do together when it's already a hobby that he has. it's not like you're coming up with something for you to do together. You're saying, I want you to do what I do. I want you to be part of what I do. And I'm not going to make any room for us to create a new thing.

I literally just saw something on this where people were talking about how women will always invest in like man's men's hobbies. Yeah. Versus like, how are you investing in me? I validate them as hobbies. Yeah. And it's like, oh, well, that's not a hobby. Like sewing, like painting. Don't think that we started sewing is wonderful. It's a work. We're gonna go. We're gonna go to sewing. Yeah. No, you're right. It's crazy. How many times have you been sat watching some boring man movie because it's his favorite movie? How many times has he sat and watched your movies?

Namely Princess Diaries. I can't even get started on this. I can't talk about this, but I did watch all of the Marvel movies for a man would not watch Princess Diaries, too. Two is still really good for a super movie. It's a really good movie. Chris Pine. Very special.

They got to bring them back. If they when they are doing a third movie, they need are they both in it? I don't know if they're not married and still together with kids and raising the next monarchy. I will riot. Yeah. I will riot.

Speak on it. This is 2024 though. Women need to stop pretending they're interested in men's hobbies. Stop. Stop. Looking right at the camera for that one, yeah. Stop. There is one comment OP did respond to.

Someone goes, he did it on purpose, 99% sure. Her being a white belt, he should know to go easy. Yeah, injuries can happen, but it seems like he put more effort than he should have. Also, if I were you, I would look up the gym and the instructor to see how legit it is. Even in professional fights or BJJ matches, it rarely happens because they all give their opponent

time to tap and they are doing it to win. Seems like a blue belt should not be a blue belt. That's what makes me think he did it on purpose or doesn't know what he is doing. So yeah, I think you are the asshole. Oh, get us out. Exactly. This person sounds like they're for you.

They know what they're doing. They're familiar with Brazilian tips. Yeah. OP ignores anything in relation to like blame and just says, my instructor's lineage is good. He's trained lineage. Is it Pokemon? Like his ancestor.

Yeah, like his father and his grandfather. He's trained under more than one black belt and he has participated in tournaments all over the world. The academy is accredited and is probably the best one in the province. He is legit and his lineage proves it. What the hell does lineage mean? I'm with the lineage. Dude, I want a punch in the province. He is legit and his lineage proves it. What the hell does lineage mean? I'm with the lineage. Dude, I want a punch in the face.

Oh my God, so he like didn't take the comments and change his mind. Nope, okay. Great. He won't believe his girlfriend or any of the people he has. Well, this is girlfriend have lineage. These are questions we have to ask. I hate them.

Would this be break up where they free us? Yes, yes, but so many things are break up where they free me. It's a good point. What's some, what would you find the most innocent break up reason? Like the least serious one? Too tall. You couldn't reach them. Too successful.

Well, yeah, you told me someone last night and I was like, girl, what is ghosting? I like him. What was the other one? Oh, text too much. Another one didn't text enough. Just, you know, just got to be just right. Fine line.

Fine line. Cheated on me. That's some valid percent. OK, moving along. OK, this one is two days old. It's coming from AITH titled, Am I the asshole for telling my husband that his buddy's wife, needing help, is not my problem.

My husband and I live right next door to his friend Tim and his friend's wife, Jonah. I have a four-year-old son and a weak old daughter. Tim and Jonah have a five-year-old and three-day-old. My labor went a lot smoother than hers did. She ended up needing an emergency hysterectomy as she was bleeding out on the labor and delivery bed. They came home last night.

Now, when they got home, Tim called my husband down to smoke a joint, and when he got back upstairs, he told me that Tim had asked him for a favor. Apparently, he was wondering if I would go over to his house periodically throughout the day while he was at work to check on his wife and do tasks for her. Cooking, cleaning, keeping her company, as she was bedridden and feeling really down and depressed

from the unexpected hysterectomy and the reality of not being able to have more children. Listen, I feel for women, I really do. But this is not my problem. I just had a baby myself a week ago. And even cooking for us is a chore in itself. Because of how exhausted I am. My husband said repeatedly, quote,

it's okay if you say no, I'm sure they would understand, but like, it'd be nice if you did this for them because I'm sure they could really use the company. And I know I'm being selfish, but I do not care if she could use the company. And I know I'm being selfish, but I do not care if she could use the company. And I feel really backed into a corner and manipulated with word play. It's okay if you say no, but you should just say yes. But I'm getting really pissed off that

I'm even asked of this. I asked my husband why him or his buddy would immediately think I would be able to do this considering I just had my own baby. And I'm also taking care of a four year old. He said, quote, I'm also taking care of a four-year-old. He said, quote, I understand that, but you're already up in doing things. And she can't even do that because she's bedridden. So she can't even make her kid food or anything. Anyways, I told him no.

I told him I had a bad taste in my mouth about them attempting to back me into a corner for a yes answer with their guilt trips and that if she was incapable of doing anything, Tim needed to step it up and either A, take time off from work, or B, start meal prepping and call someone else to come into his home and do everything else. My husband and Tim work at the same job, and they were both given four days off when we went into labor. So he had time to try and figure this out, but instead, he tried ponding it off on me,

thinking I would say yes. My husband said that he doesn't blame me for saying no, but my attitude on it has caused tension between him and Tim, because I'm acting heartless. Am I the asshole for not carrying that Jonah need help and telling them that it's not my problem? First of all, if the husband weren't smoking a joint with his buddy, maybe he could

be helping out a little bit. And that's a good point. A week after they've given birth, do you know how like she shouldn't be up and doing stuff? Like how is that a serve to be like, well, you're up and doing stuff and she shouldn't be, she should be like vibing. She should be in her vibe, glowing and growing. Have you seen a weak old baby? It's a worm. They look like an alien. Like you need someone else there to even just go take a shower.

Yeah, you can't do that. Yeah, 20 minutes. Yeah, 20 minutes. What's she gonna do? Pack up her newborn and the five year old or four year old that she has and walk next door and then do all this other ladies shit? They're just like, ooh woman job. I know woman.

Woman near me, woman could do. Woman could go there and do both. This is so crazy. First of all, Tim, step up. Secondly, why can't your husband do it? It's not like he's clearly not helping you at home. Or get a nanny. Both of these people, both of these husbands.

Like, are you talking about? Or like a relative. Like someone who doesn't have a newborn. This happened to my mom, actually. I mean, really? Not, is that anyone else? Not the exact same, but my brother and sister were 11 months apart. And she had both like very young babies,

and we had a relative in the family who had just had kids too. And they asked her to fly out and like, help out with the kids and like, bring her, she was like, I can't do that. What? Like right now, my life is insane. You have no idea.

I have two kids under the age of one. Do they not have any other friends? Do they not have family? I don't understand. You can't call a nanny. I literally don't understand why you would think a woman who pushed a fetus out of her vagina. Like, she can barely walk around.

She's using diapers, you know? Like you can't even, you're not stitched up down there. Like, you're not even really sometimes supposed to hold your baby because of how injured you are. Like, what are we talking about? It's actually crazy. And the fact that you mentioned that too, like, she's definitely still healing healing and I just saw a video

on Twitter where it was like a guy putting like a Panny liner in his wife's underwear Postpartum and people were like commending him like this is a real man. Oh, I think this all that video This is a real man. Oh, I think it's all that video. It's like, well, it's an easy task. Well, her guts are falling out of her body. No, it's not. So, sorry, not to, but this is how dire we're at, right now.

Yeah. And it's true. It is true. It's crazy. It's actually crazy that she mentioned that she is doing cooking and cleaning around her house right now. I fully will not do anything for at least six months. Nor should you. I expect you. I would. I fully will not do anything for at least six months. Nor should you.

I expect you to be weighted on hand and foot. If I have to do it, I will refuse to do anything. Well, this reminds me I saw someone women are so fucking tough. Yeah. No, no, no, no, it's so true. I speak on it. Yeah, just there was like a man being interviewed

and he had just had a baby for the first time with his wife. And he had contacted his mom and he was like, I just want you to know this made me realize. Cause back then I always thought my dad was the one working hard going off to work and you got to stay home. But now I realize that my dad was the lucky one having an easy like going off to work while you stayed home. And I always thought that what he was doing was harder.

Cause you see them leaving with their briefcase, going off, yeah, stay at home moms. They deserve Nobel Peace prizes. Like to keep that together, kids on a schedule, especially people, can you imagine homeschooling? And having a hell of a one baby, more than one kid, she's got a toddler in the home at the same time.

They're demons. Tothers, I'm like, I'm like, I don't understand. Like, they don't understand why you can't give them. They're not gonna give them. Exactly, no. I would be like, we're going to couples therapy over this. Like, this is unacceptable that you would even have the audacity and the lack of brain cells to ask me this.

Well, it just shows a total lack of respect for what she's doing. Like, it makes it so clear that he doesn't recognize what she's been having to do for their family. Which is crazy. I don't know how you could watch someone give birth. And they're second child. And think that, you know?

Yeah. It's nuts. We have a lot of comments from our OP. Of course. Of course. So I'm going in order from like first posted to most recent. There's a comment that was deleted by the user, but it seems like they were asking kind of how close she is with this other wife. Well, that's the thing. I have met this woman twice each time for maybe 15 minutes.

My husband has only been friends with this guy for going on four months. He met through work and we just happened to move right next door a month later, which made their friendship stronger. Grab and do it. It sounds like, uh, what's that movie? Don't worry, darling. My husband has only met the wife maybe three times. So neither of us know her well at all.

And I certainly don't feel comfortable being in the position to care for her, her older child or take care of their home either. Well, yeah, because a lot of it also sounds like they want emotional labor for her, like taking care of how she's feeling about everything, which is so draining when you're already like, she's healthy and normal, but she probably has postpartum as well, like.

Yeah, especially with the hysterectomy, like having that choice to not have any more kids or that autonomy over your body would be gut-wrenching. That is she needs to seek care, be support. Like someone who's a family member or a friend who knows her, have met more than a couple times. Yeah. This person kind of popped off and goes, you're the asshole. They're calling her the asshole for not wanting to help. You don't have to, but you ought to help friends and neighbors.

It's not like you work anyways. Ah! Not the gas, I just gasped. I know. Oh, if he goes, they are not my friends. I've met her twice. I've met Tim, the husband, maybe four times. And that's just another man being like, yeah, woman labor.

Woman go do the labor that women do. Someone goes, where's her family? Like this is one of those times, you, IE, they, need to call their family and ask for help. OP responds, I've seen her mom stop by at least once a week since we moved in here three months ago. Same with her sister. So she has options, I'm assuming.

Okay, I'm just imagining these two men are on lunch break at work. And the one guy is like, yeah, my wife's having a really hard time. And the other dude's like, well, dude, my wife has had babies. She just have babies. She can take care of a baby. I'll set you up, dude. Like I can join. Imagine while they're smoking a joint together outside. Like go meal prep.

Go start cooking. Go start cleaning your fucking house. Do the dishes. Do half time to just like just just hang out with a friend and smoke a joint a week after you've just brought a child into your family. So crazy.

It's not even like that alone is shocking to me. That's an insane luxury. Yeah. Where's the baby? Yeah. Where's the baby? Where is your child? Where, like, what's going on here?

Um, yeah, there's a lot of comments. People are like, you don't have to do everything, but show some compassion instead of sitting at home all day on your phone. Men are saying that. Sorry. Were those comments being a lot of likes? No, they on your phone. Men are saying that. Sorry. Were those comments being a lot of likes? No, they got down voted. OK.

Thank God. No, that one got down voted 457 points. Thank God. Yeah, there's just a lot of comments. Someone goes, I cannot believe your husband thinks this is OK. You shouldn't even be doing much yourself. And he's outside getting high with his buddy when he should be inside helping you.

If I were you, I'd go home to my mom if that's doable. Yeah. And Opie responds, I honestly don't even think that he does think it's okay. He's just a people pleaser and it happens to be at my expense. He has a hard time telling Tim no. Half the time he bitches when Tim gets a hold of him to go hang out because he doesn't want to go but feels bad saying that he can't He needs to grow up woman up and not be such a what the hell handsy

Speak up for yourself and your wife God damn it. Yeah, be a grown-up. I know. Oh, he's going to bat for him too Someone's like what the fuck did I just read is your husband an asshole or just a moron? someone's like, what the fuck did I just read? Is your husband an asshole or just a moron? No, he goes, he's just a moron. Jenner, Jenner at least begin. He's a sweetheart. Wicked good dad too, but Tim, he lacks the ability to say no to Tim. So that's a detail you left out.

I don't know if you realize that they're from Boston. This is all making a lot more sense. Okay. Those are a little more toxic. A Boston man all making a lot more sense. Okay. They're a little more toxic. They're not a Boston men, they're toxic masculinity. Okay. Yeah, I honestly,

I know this is probably not easy and feasible, but I would not want to keep living next to these people. Yeah, because it sounds like they are going to want to take and take and take. It's like easier access to just sucky dry. Do we know with the other wife, did she ask what I was feeling? Do we know anything about how was she thinking this

was any kind of good idea? Like, no. That's a good question. Like, possibly. I wish. Possibly she doesn't actually even want this. Like that wasn't her idea. She probably doesn't even want that. I mean, I'm not probably going to be this.

I bet that's the case. Yeah. Like if I was at my lowest of lows and just not doing well after giving birth, like I wouldn't want a stranger to come take care of me. No, my home colleagues wife. And like you're probably embarrassed, like it's a mess because you know, there's kids running around. You haven't been able to do do anything like you just don't want people in your family you want in your home. Well maybe like a professional nurse you know somebody

that like you've seen it and isn't going to judge you. Ben in the trenches. Yeah. Yeah. I just this is crazy. I would I would be calling the mom and sister to come like. Like you said they have been visiting. They've been there. So it's like they're clearly in town. So sometimes these stressed me out when it's couples who are already married with children together. Cause I'm like, ooh, wish I could be like, break up.

Break up. I know. And it's obviously like easier said than done. I say get divorced a lot. Yeah. But I feel like something I say get divorced a lot. Yeah. But I feel like something that has like had a lot of discourse lately is like people being great partners until the kids come and then all of a sudden they flip a switch. And to me, that's the scariest thing in the world.

Oh yeah. Yeah. Because like, I don't want to do this by myself. I want it 50 50. Right. Like truly 50 50. And it's like, you could have someone say like, Oh, yeah, I'm so willing to do that. But then when it comes down to it, I saw like a question that you should ask your partner. And it was like, if the kids get sick and we both are working, who has to stay home? And it's like simple questions like that. Like is it automatically assumed

because you're the mom, you're gonna be the one staying home? Yeah. Like it's like there's a list of questions you should ask. And I started like, started like asking them. And I'm like, now that you're engaged, it's like, let's start putting these out there. I know, I'm like, I gotta make sure, fuck.

But it is, like it is, it's scary. You just don't know until a kid is literally there in front of you. And then at that point, it's like, it changes people. And you're so vulnerable. And you're so vulnerable. When you have a kid, you can't just abandon the kid.

And it is typically on the person that has the kid. You're breastfeeding, you're doing these things that the baby is usually like, more attached to you early on. Like, it's just a struggle. It's a struggle. Yeah, it's tough being a woman. Yeah, it is.

That's sort of the thing. Yeah, it's a girly girl episode. My gosh, okay. Well, next story, let's see if I can find one where there's a girly in hot water. See, the problem is, I'll never say that she's wrong. I struggled so hard. She did nothing wrong.

No, I struggled so hard with that admitting that we almost never do. Yeah. I'll be like, I'll be like, well, I bet there's something they're leaving us. There's something they're not telling us. I will say with this one, I hope this is a story that Jonas wife, or maybe the wife's name was Jonah, I hope the other wife finds this post and writes her side of the story. We've had that happen. We've had like themes on it. I'm working on one if anyone sees stories send them away. But I really hope she finds it. And it's like this post made me realize how unengaged my husband was.

And yeah, we can only hope that would be huge. Oh, asshole. Okay, moving along. One of this week's partners is Zock-Dock. Have you ever been a doctor that just has zero filter? Doesn't respect you, clearly judging you. Maybe saying those negative things directly to your face. I've experienced one, and it was dehumanizing and really traumatic.

But if you're actually looking for a doctor who listens to you, respects you, has amazing bedside manner. You can find them on ZockDock. ZockDock is a free app and website where you can search and compare highly rated in network doctors, near you, and instantly book appointments with them online. My favorite part about ZockDock is reading other people's reviews. Did they listen to them? Did they respect them?

Were they willing to come up with a treatment plan that worked? It is so important to find someone you trust and like, and ZockDock makes that so much easier. I've been using ZockDock since 2015, and I've found some of the most amazing providers, including my gynecologist, where that is a really vulnerable position you're in. Literally. been using ZockDock since 2015 and I found some of the most amazing providers, including my gynecologist, where that is a really vulnerable position you're in. Literally. And it was the reviews I read on ZockDock that really guided me to her. And you can book appointments all without even having to make a phone call and talk to someone. So if you're ready to try it for yourself, go to zockdock.com slash THD and download

the ZockDock app for free. Then find and book a top right of doctor today. That's zoc.oc.com slash THT. ZockDock.com slash THT. This one is, it's a heavy one, you guys. So I feel like I should give a trigger warning for like tragic animal loss. Oh, okay. It's a little heavy.

So if animals and like losing a dog is gonna trigger you like skip skip ahead So this is four days old my 35 male girlfriend 35 female won't admit to killing my dog What do I end it you're starting strong with trying to convince us. This might be one. What the hell? About four years ago, my then girlfriend was about to move in with me. My dog had a broken back from an injury four years prior. The injury was my fault, but he had healed and could walk and run.

However, he tweaked his back jumping up on a wall. After taking him to the vet, he was given GABA PENTAIN for his pain. Prescribed by the vet, my dog weighed 27 pounds and was given 400 milligrams of GABA PENTAIN, 200 milligrams and then 200 milligrams two hours later. A fairly large dose, blip. A fairly large, that's okay, Queen. You got this. You're doing amazing. You're doing so good. A fairly largeish dose for his size. He was not supposed to move or be in pain so his back could heal.

My ex partner thought he would be more comfortable to put a 20, five pound weighted blanket designed for humans on him and folded it like she was making a bed on top of his diaphragm. When I got home from work, she said that my dog looked strange. He looked strange because he was dead for two hours. She suffocated him under the weighted blanket. When I explained what happened to him, she freaked out and started cursing at me and blaming me for giving him gabapentin. I said quite a few choice words and the relationship was done.

By choice words, I mean I cursed her out. I did eventually apologize for that, but she never admitted to killing him. Fast forward 18 months and we have been talking again. We were in love, very much so, but I was unable to forgive her for not taking responsibility for my dog's death. I told her there was no way we could be friends or anything romantic until she took responsibility for suffocating my dog. She refuses to apologize or even acknowledge that she killed him and again blames it on the GABA PENTIN and injuring his back four years prior. I find the behavior morally reprehensible and refused to be with

someone who can't do the bare minimum of accepting responsibility for doing something terrible to someone they loved. She also claimed she loved my dog. She says, I'm going in circles, holding onto the past, etc. Which, to me, sounds a lot like gaslighting slash stonewalling. How should I go about this? Do I cut ties or accept the loss of these five years? What? Um, so she thinks, like genuinely thinks that it wasn't the way to blanket that killed the dog. It appears that way and he's very, very sure that he was the way to blanket and suffocation

that killed the dog. Did they autopsy the dog? I will see if there's any comments. I mean, it's, I'm really, you know, we're not great at math. Me and Ellie talked about this on the way here today. No, not me as well. Two plus two equals four, you know, I'm good at that. Right.

Dog was 27 pounds, weighted blanket was 25 pounds. Oh wow. And she folded it. Yeah. I don't know if that like increases the pressure. It makes it more hard to say. This is some physics where like distribution also changes how heavy something feels. I feel like folding it makes it feel

therefore heavier. I'm not a fucking scientist. I don't know. That makes a lot of sense though. But it really makes a lot of sense. I feel like. But it's, yeah. Yes.

I feel like kind of a small dog. I feel like kind of a small dog. I feel like, yes. Yeah, so this is, that is scary to like, especially if he knows for sure that this is what happened, and like she just won't take responsibility for it. That's a very scary person to choose to have a relationship with.

The whole concept of not admitting wrongdoing, it's very dangerous. It's hard to keep a relationship going in that way. Yeah. And that's sort of like the worst case scenario. That's not like she didn't flush the toilet. And you were like, did you not flush the toilet? She said, no, how would you go?

Would you? Why dare would you say that? She killed your dog. Yeah. And won't admit that she did something wrong. Like, that's kind of a serious thing. And we were just talking about how you should be nervous about who you have children with. And I feel like this really goes back to that.

Like, this is something, and this is like the first thing in my mind when I date people is how would they be to my children, which weird, not even, I don't know why, I'm already thinking that way. But like, that would be a deal breaker for me to be like, oh, if they can't accept responsibility for something that happened to the dog, why would I want to raise children with this person? Because it's kind of narcissism, right? Like to say that it could never be your fault. And like, in what other circumstances, like like it almost seems like he's not even obviously I'm sure he's very upset that the dog had died and was killed but like he's not like I can never forgive you because you killed my dog he's like I can't forgive you because you won't even

say you did that. She won't even apologize. Right. I've apologized for so many things that like I don't necessarily feel the need for but like that doesn't matter like I hurt someone else's feelings. Right. I apologize for so many things that like I don't necessarily feel the need for, but like that doesn't matter. Like I hurt someone else's feelings. Yes. However intentional it is, like that's the bottom line. I hurt someone's feelings. Yeah.

I can apologize for doing that. Even if she thinks there's a chance that that's not how the dog died being like, you know what, that was a stupid idea. It was a stupid idea to think that that would like be a helpful thing for the dog now that I'm thinking about it, I realize that that didn't make sense. And I could have caused that. And I'm really sorry if that's what happened. Even if she has to throw an if in there.

Because to just fully be like, there's no way, no chance. Absolutely not. Couldn't have been me. No, it was the drug that the vet prescribed to the dog, which like, that's not how that works. Also, weighted blankets give me sleep paralysis. So I know that there's something with those things. Oh, that's so scary.

Because it's like you can't move when you're under them, which increases the odds of getting sleep paralysis. Creepy. And then imagine if I had taken drugs, I don't know. They should put that on the packaging for those things. Yeah, good to know. Good to know everybody. Wow, PSA.

I just got one. I'm not using it to sleep, but. Well, you can test it out. Some people love it. Some people have a sense. I kind of like it, but I need to be squished. I need the squish. I literally, you know, I literally you know temple Grandin

temple Grandin is an autistic woman who developed mechanisms to help decrease cows stress as they go to oh be killed yes and temple Grandin sounds like a game on your iPhone. Like a drone. Yeah, I literally, yeah. That's what I thought as well. But she created a device for herself when she became overstimulated. And she would put herself in the device and pull the lever and it would squish her.

So me and I'm in the device. Yeah, literally I tell my partner, Justin, I'm like, can you just squish me? Like literally lay on top of me. I just need to be squished. Like I'm overwhelmed, squish me. It feels so good. I literally, sometimes I say, can you just temple Grand squish me? Like literally lay on top of me. I just need to be squished. Like I'm overwhelmed, squish me. It feels so good. I literally, sometimes I say, can you just like temple grand in me?

But like, it's probably not appropriate to say. That's appropriate. She developed into a squishing device. She's an inventor of squishing. She is. So she is. She lies it. What a sad story. And I would say he should just cut and run.

Yeah, cut. Cut. Be nice, move on. You really? I feel like he'll always have some kind of resentment or like, maybe not resentment, but just distrust or anger. Yeah. It does break the trust and I feel like it's just dangerous to get back in if you're already out.

He'll never look at her and not see his dead squished dog. Oh, sorry. Like, am I wrong? No. You're 100% right. There's also a lot of comments from OP. It's a dumpster fire in these comments. Like truly people are like, oh, you've

been going to give them that much gabapentin for a small dog. Like, oh, they're saying that dose doesn't make sense? Yeah. And like, he's like, what did you go on Google? Like, did you get a veterinary degree? Literally. That's like the first answer on Google apparently. Yeah.

And apparently a dog can OD on Gabapentin? I don't know. But I will post the link for this one if you really want to deep dive in the comments. I mean, he shares a lot of personal stuff. People are like, I don't know why you're talking to her again. Like, people are saying, like, dude, there's more pussy out there.

Why don't you just go find another one? Another pussy. Yeah. So many pussy's just find another pussy. And OP happens to share, like, personal information that he's bipolar and mentions like a previous abortion they had. And so then people started attacking him for that.

Like, totally getting away from the problem. Yeah. He does get asked, did you perform an autopsy to specifically find out? Big question. Big question. And he says, no, she had him cremated, so he was unable to.

Why was she cremating the dog? I do not know. I don't know if I believe him. I do not know. What do you mean she cremated your dog? Would she put him in the fireplace? What are you talking about? I'm so confused.

What is he saying? Sorry. Can you imagine? I don't know, literally. Like, why was that her decision? And how would she do this without, like, he's really put it, no. She was just where this horrible sexual circumcision

comes in. Because he seems to be saying things that don't make sense could be her responsibility. What is she wouldn't be able to sign the thing I don't think? I mean, I don't know, like maybe they put him in the freezer until they could take him in sooner. I just saw a video of someone storing their cat in a freezer. I might have been from a TV show now that I'm thinking about it.

But I do know people that have had to buy walk-in freezers to store their dog or cat so they could bury them come springtime when the ground unthought. Wait, you can't bury some. That's a Minnesota thing. But why is she not just saying like, we cremated. Why is she saying she cremated? Like she took that decision away. Or like she stole the dog in the night.

And literally that's what he's making it sound like. What are we talking about? Yeah. It's my one thing. It's my one question. That's the one part where I'm like, I don't know. But it does just seem like this might have been kind of a toxic relationship overall.

Well, and he comments to he's like, I've never attributed this to Malice. I just thought it was negligence. Like the dog wouldn't have froze to death. So why, like put a blanket on him even. There were many, many blankets right beside the dog, but she went further and found the weighted blanket. Because she probably thought it'd be nice.

Like a nice little comfy. Yeah, I don't know. And then he said something like the dog died almost immediately while she went into the shower. So after five minutes, the blanket was put on. He passed. I know this due to the rigor mortis setting in when I tried to give my dog CPR. So what does suffocation obvious? Like, would she have seen,

like, would she have noticed if the dog would have been making some kind of noise? Like a gasping or like a, you think? Probably, right? I don't think suffocation happened silently. And I don't think you go out without a fight unless the pillows on your face. Although the dog was on drugs, so maybe it's more like a tarjet didn't we couldn't fight it. Things adding up slowly just went seems like maybe just

a slippery soap of bad things all came together. Well, doctor veterinarians need to start putting out that PSA. Don't put a weighted blanket on your dog when they take the. Why would you put it? Well, you're right. No, common sense is not common. But if I took a little anti-exidae or pain medicine, I'd be like, who am I to get comfy now?

No, hold on. Because if I took my little volume and went under a weighted blanket, I'd never get up. No, I'm going to do it. But not in a dead way. It just would be comfy. Yeah. We have a little bit more info.

Someone gets a real specific with questions. One, she sent you a video just prior. Two, dog was gone for two hours. Three, she said he looked strange. Four, she cared enough to put a blanket on him, but not enough to check on him. Five, she can't really admit or explain. Could she have actually killed the dog, either on purpose or accident, then tried to cover it up with the above. AKA the blanket. One, I was working. I received a video I couldn't watch due to internet restrictions. The video showed my dog under the blanket, looking really stressed. I didn't see the video until a couple of hours after my dog was dead.

Well, that's not looking good for her. Yeah. Because you can tell when someone is stressed or suffocating. I haven't seen a lot of suffocations. I hate it. Well, to be fair. It's hard because with people, our skin changes, because the lack of oxygen. Also, that's different for people with more melanin.

It's harder to tell when people that are of color have decreased oxygen sets, even the finger O2 sets don't work as well on black people because of the infrared light working through the skin. It's like harder to penetrate. So there's like a lot of like bias in like even medicine with people and like dogs have fur. Right. So like, I don't know, but like if she sent a video of the dog looking stressed, and then sent him a message an hour before he got home that the dog looked strange,

put two and two together, bitch. Like, take the blanket off of it. Yeah, I feel like she, I feel like she did know. I feel like she's playing dumb. Yeah. Just question about us. I have questions, but I think she's in the wrong. Yeah, it's just move on. Like this is not worth it. Like I've been in my relationship for five years, but if Justin killed one of my horses with his negligence, like my pony, and he couldn't apologize, we'd be done. Yeah, that's scary. Yeah, that is scary.

It's scary to not feel like there's any need to apologize. Yeah Yeah, the top the top comment with 6,000 upvotes you answered your own question You just didn't like the answer and they quote OP and go I find the behavior morally Reprehensible and refused to be with someone who can't do the bare minimum of accepting responsibility for something For doing something terrible. Yeah case closed. Yeah, I'm not so true someone who can't do the bare minimum of accepting responsibility for something, for doing something terrible. Yeah. Case closed.

Yeah. Period. That's so true. Done. It was hard for me though. Was it? It was hard for me. To admit that a woman did something wrong.

Yeah. I still question some of his comments. I'm with him. I'm fully with him. You got to, you got to get rid of the dog killer. She gone. And the cremator of your dog. Apparently, taking them in the night, cremating them. That is no. It's a weird comment. That is suspicious. This next one is three days old. It is titled, Am I the asshole for not warning my partner of an outcome I thought was common sense? Last night I, 21 female, cooked dinner as I usually would for my partner, 20 male and

I. And it was a chicken dish. If it makes any difference, chicken breast I had bought packaged from a supermarket yesterday and it was still relatively fresh according to the use by date. Between my partner and I, if one cooks, the other will wash the dishes and put leftovers away. And so later that night, my partner was washing up and went to put the leftovers away, but for whatever reason decided to leave the dinner leftovers in the saucepan on the stove. I had noticed before I went to bed and asked what he was planning on doing with the leftovers and he just replied, quote, I'm taking them to work tomorrow for lunch.

Fair enough, I thought and went to bed. Come the next morning and we're both getting ready to leave for work. And by the time I made my way downstairs, my partner had already packed his lunch and was getting ready. I thought nothing out of the ordinary and we both headed off for the day. Posting in real time, I'd not long ago, get home and find my partner glued to the loo, groaning and moaning and some other unpleasant sounds. I asked what's wrong and he starts going off about the chicken. I just said, well, I'm fine.

Did you heat it up enough before eating it? And in return, got a meek response of, no, I ate it cold from the sauce pan. Yeah, that was what I was worried about. I'm not going to lie. I was a bit confused on why he was eating it from the sauce pan. And even more confused because I didn't see him leave this morning with the sauce pan. So I asked about a container.

He said, apparently all of our food containers have vanished from the cupboard. And he hadn't washed any others that night. So he just left the leftovers on the counter overnight and took them to work today. I really didn't mean to sound the way I did when I said it, but I replied, quote, why the fuck would you do that? Did you want food poisoning? And he fired back angrily. Well last night when you asked, why didn't you say anything about it? He's fallen, froth

in at the mouth. Yeah, well, I thought it was common sense. I leave and chicken out for 12 hours. 16 hours, I believe, by the time he actually eats his lunch. Oh, no. And then eating it would lead to a bad situation, but apparently not. So am I the asshole for not warning him?

No! Of the consequences of eating old, un-refrigerated chicken. Not even a little bit. No. Not even at all. No. Also her response is how any of us would respond. And here's the thing.

I have experienced the not knowing of things in later in life that should be obvious. So for example, recently not knowing that pickles came from cucumbers. And how would you know that? Not knowing that raisins came from grapes. Yep, that one's harder for me. But, well, and I just, I wasn't a big fan of eating those things. The thing about chicken, who among us isn't eating chicken, often in our lives.

And listen, I have food poisoning to myself more times than I want to say, because I'm bad at cooking, right? But I do and I am very scared of like leftovers So that is one thing you know to put the leftover in the fridge Yeah, especially chicken the chicken's the poster child of being careful. It's like oh my god Salmanella Smell by that point like I would imagine they would have had a smell. It's meat. It's a good smell by that point. Like I would imagine they would've had a smell. It's meat. It's meat.

You can't leave meat out. Even pasta and rice, you can't leave out from more than like an hour. Otherwise you can literally die. This is a good thing. You can die. The situation, I would like take my partner aside and be like, do you know not to put metal in a toaster?

Do you know not to put a little metal in a microwave? Also, to write down. No, no, until I had experience. You see the sparks and then you're like, oh my god, what is going on? Yeah, it's a quick way to find out what cups have metal inside of them are plates. Yeah. Look, it's not the problem, not necessarily that he didn't know, is that he expected her to realize that he didn't know, it was that he expected her to realize that he didn't know and warn him.

But because like if she had warned him, she would have come across like nagging him or like being him in some way. I would be scared to tell someone that because I'd be like, I don't want them to think I think they're stupid. Like that would make me feel like I was gonna insult them. Yes, it's up here like you could have gone the other way with like telling him it could have made him mad.

Right. Either way. Yeah. Like if you were like, are you gonna put that away? Yeah. And he said, no, you would have to be like, well, you could get sick. Don't eat it. Can you remind me of his age? 20.

Okay. Yeah. It's old enough to know. You've lived a lot of life. I've been out of high school for two, three years at least. And we'll say, I think this is the downfall of boymoms. His mother. Boymoms that coddle their boys, that don't teach them how to do laundry, that don't let

them cook for themselves. Like, you need to raise your son to stand on his own two feet. You shouldn't raise your son to go from your house to his wife's house or his partner's house. Like, have him be a self-sufficient, independent, strong adult. Yeah. I'm sorry, I don't know if I missed this in the story.

Did he take the saucepan with him in the car to work? I think so. Wait, because like it's funny enough when men will do that thing where they just put the whole pan in the fridge. Okay, I'm gonna be honest with my god. Oh my god. Sure, what time is it?

I'm just like, I've literally put the air fryer basket just in the fridge, because I'm just like, I can't. Well it's you and so it's okay. And so it's fine. You're good. But thank like, I can't. Well it's you and so it's okay. And so it's fine. You're good. But thank you, I can pass. That's like funny enough, but like to take like a rotted

like gross pan in your car. Like you don't ever, not one, not at one point during that moment, did you think to yourself, there's something wrong here? No. I can't stop laughing in my head imagining like why he thought they were putting meat in the fridge overnight Like what like what why did he think they were doing that just so it was in a nice container for him to bring it to work

Probably could be like that. He was thinking that's why we put things in the fridge overnight Yeah, I just think there are a lot of moments for him where he should have stopped and thought what was going on was weird And didn't and that's concerning. I'm very surprised in my own life how I haven't gotten food poisoning more. To be honest, it's only happened to be once. I've had it quite a few times now. It's in my restaurant. It's in my restaurant.

It's just the sushi food poisoning, it's a by far the worst, but chicken also up there. But like in college like you get like food drunk like especially pizza. Yeah, and oh my god We had this one pizza place in Dinky town. That's like my little college town and it was like Mesa pizza and they'd put mac and cheese on the pizza Or like taco pizza, but the mac and cheese one, I for sure left one out on the counter overnight and then ate it the next day for lunch. Oh yeah. So how did I die? I think it's the preservatives,

probably that were in this stuff. But I didn't know until recently that you're not supposed to have pizza that's been left out on the counter. I was doing that, well, like a few years ago. Like I was doing that. You're learning a lot of things lately. Well, you're like a, well, you know, old pizza so shortly, right?

Not overnight, but you're actually not even supposed to leave it out for like more than a few hours. Yeah, I have fully left it out many times overnight. Yeah, told. So like I'm kind of looking at him and I'm like, pizza and chicken are not the same. No, pizza and chicken are not the same. Especially like Domino's pizza. You could probably put that in a landfill for. No, it's chicken. It's chicken are not the same. Oh, I like Domino's pizza. You could probably put that in a landfill for 20 years and it's not going to get bad. I cannot do Domino's anymore. I love it.

The taste. I love, but every time. Yep. Yep. Not good. And it's worth it to me. I don't know if I've ever had Domino's pizza. It's so special to me. Where have you been? I don't know if I've ever had Domino's pizza. Oh. It's so special to me. Where have you been?

I don't know. I've never really liked pizza from places like that. I always try to find a place that makes a nice margarita pizza. Oh. Okay. Here's my bone to pick with margarita pizza. For somewhat. Okay.

I like, like, Neopolitan margaritas, right? It's more like there's big blobs of the cheese with the basil. Right. But then people will use margarita interchangeably for that pizza when I go to order a margarita and it comes out fully cheese with no basil. Oh, it's gotta have basil.

You just gaslit me. Yeah. I don't like that. I think it's gotta have basil. You just gaslit me. Yeah. I don't like that. I think it's that they don't know the definition. There are some liars in this world. They're really are. And that's on that. And it's sad.

Overall vote on this one. What do you think it was? I don't know if anyone's, necessarily an asshole. I guess he is for being mad. I mean, he's probably just emotional. He's in distress. He probably just emotional. He's just, he's not in that moment. He would blame anything in that moment. Oh my god. I just

like, I can put myself in those shoes. And like, it's harrowing. I do hope after a day he was like, yeah, that was my bad. Like, I should have known that. And you know what? He'll never do it again. Never. Sometimes you got to learn the hard way. Mm-hmm. Overall vote not the asshole top comment not the asshole Perhaps you will learn from this experience Perhaps perhaps when helps oh p responds. I really really really hope for both of our sakes. Oh, he has For both because she can't even use the bathroom. Oh God, then they're home. I bet. I hope they don't have just one. Yeah. 20, I think they probably do just have one. Yeah. That's a good point. This was our fear at our house that we were doing. There was only one

bathroom there. We had to add another one because we both have stomach problems. And gotta be safe. Gotta be safe for them. Oh, yeah. We have to. Okay, next story. Another one of this week's partners is Hello Frash. Do you love not having to go to the grocery store? Do you love not having to think about these extravagant meals

and do all the prepping for it? Well, then you're gonna love Hello Frash. With Hello Frash, you have farm fresh, pre-portioned ingredients and seasonal recipes delivered right to your doorstep. So you can skip those trips to the grocery store and count on HellaFresh to make home cooking easy, fun, and affordable. Let me tell you, my budget know to says when I'm ordering HellaFresh. It's so much cheaper than even regular grocery shopping.

I don't have food that gets wasted and it's definitely cheaper than takeout. I really make the most of it. It saves money, saves time, and definitely saves on stress. And I'm eating better. HellaFresh has so many different meal plans to choose from, and you can really customize whatever protein you're into. And I really hate cooking, like actually hate it. But hello fresh has meal options that are 15 minutes or less, and that is music to my ears. So if you're looking to eat a little better or

maybe get more protein, there's a bunch of different meal plan options you can choose from. If you're ready to try it for yourself, go to HelloFresh.com slash THT free and use code THT free for free breakfast for life. One breakfast item per box while subscription is active, that's free breakfast for life at HelloFresh.com slash THT free with code THT free. HelloF fresh America's number one milk kit. This one is nine days old. And I think you guys are about to be angry. Just, angry. Ah, just physically in pain. Two weeks before my wedding, my best friend can fast that the reason why me and my fiance got together and will be married is because of her. I don't know what to do. I've been sleepless for days because of this.

I need to get this off my chest or my heart might explode. My wedding is on the 19th, and my bachelor at party was last Saturday and was organized by my best friend Lucy. I partied with my bridesmaids, had some shots, and they were so excited for me marrying the love of my life, Irwin. We've been together for three years. After the party, everyone was wasted and went home, leaving Lucy and I in the Airbnb. I was not that drunk, at most tipsy, so I helped her clean up because I'll be staying the night with her too. While we're cleaning, she's silent, which is very not like her. She was very active during the party, so I thought she's just tired, so I told her I can finish up, and she

can rest. So she went to the bedroom. While I was finishing the dishes, she returned to the kitchen. She told me that she needs to tell me something. So I stopped what I was doing, then she said that she sorry. She did not expect that Irwin would ask me for marriage, because, quote, it was a bet gone wrong. Oh, this is worse than I imagined. I was confused and asked her to elaborate. But what she basically told me is that when I first introduced them to each other, she and Irwin had already had a bet that if he can get me to marry him,

she will then date him exclusively. Apparently, they had been secretly dating since before I even met Irwin. What? Their relationship was toxic, so they have these constant breaks, but on this particular break, she allowed him to date anyone.

That's when Irwin and I happened to meet. When I asked her why she's only telling me this now, she said that she felt guilty. She didn't want to hurt me, but she didn't want to take full accountability and acknowledged Irwin's part in this. She was trying to convince Irwin to come clean together, but he refused and told her, nah, the bet was long gone because he was genuinely in love with me. When I asked her if she still has feelings for Irwin, she answered yes, and she realized how good of a man he is now. When I confessed if Irwin knows how she feels about him, she answered no. But if I allow her to, she'll confess her feelings to him.

At this point, I just left. I had no energy left, even if I wanted to slap her in that moment. I feel so played and betrayed and humiliated. The two closest people in my life made me a pawn to their sick games. I don't know what to do where to start. I'm so confused. It's been three days and I haven't told anyone yet, not even Irwin, who is in HK, not even my parents. Lucy hasn't tried to contact me, and I don't think she said anything yet to Irwin. The wedding is in two weeks.

How do I face this? What the fuck? First of all, nightmare scenario. This is so much worse than I could have dreamt it to be when you first introduced it. I was like, okay, maybe she turned him down or something. Right, right. She's just gonna be a little bit bitch, I don't know.

There had a bet. A bet. First of all, throw them both away. Because, yeah, he might love her now, which is great. I'm glad that at least that much changed, but to even be willing to do that is. How long?

Yeah, how long were they dating while they were dating? I don't know of OP mentions. I know we do have an update. Okay. So we do get a little bit more info. But let me see if I can find anything. Right, how soon after they started dating did he propose to her? Like how long has this been going on? Like have they been together?

She's been dating for three years. Three years. And like for how much of that was Lucy also dating him and they were like laughing at her. Like what he certainly has cheated on her. You know, like at the least. At the yeah. I'm not seeing anyone ask about the overlap. Someone's asking, did your so-called best friend show you any evidence of this? Basically being like, is she jealous? Jealous and yeah. Because that's happened before on Reddit.

Like we've seen that. And OP goes, I still haven't talked to Erwin, and I admit that I keep delaying it because I'm afraid of what he'll say. But yes, I'm picking him up from his flight tomorrow and have him explain all of Lucy's confessions. I don't wanna reach out to Lucy for more info. I just can't see her without getting angry.

She did not tell her for the right reason, because if it were for the right reason, it would have been in any time before this. But the fact that she's chose to do it right before they were actually getting married right reason because if it were for the right reason, it would have been in any time before this. But the fact that she's chose to do it right before they were actually getting married showed she didn't want them to be happy. She didn't want her to actually be with them. She could have told her at any other point in these three years.

She just wanted them to not get married. She's continuing these clearly toxic games, And she's including this person in them. 100%. I think the only reason she told her now is in hopes that Irwin would have broken up with her. Like I think she went to Irwin and it was like, okay. Like she agreed to marry you. We can be together now.

Oh. Oh. I think that Lucy was really hoping he would call it off and then they could be together like she even Crazy. Well, and she even kind of says it like she's realized how good of a man he is now Well, yeah, he is now because someone cooked there. Yeah, like he is now trained like of course everyone wants the puppy That's already potty trained. Yeah, no shit. You want him now and who's to say your relationship wouldn't be toxic again because the two of you aren't good for each other.

For each other. Come on. Get it together, Lucy. Maybe I'll ask this out of the question to you guys. If you guys were in this situation and your friend came to you a year into you dating someone, not three years when you're already engaged.

And you're not engaged. And said, hey, you know, I just want to come clean. Me and Erwin did know each other before you guys started dating. And you know, I just want to come clean. Me and Irwin did know each other before you guys started dating. And, you know, you guys have fallen in love now. We've stopped seeing each other, but like, I love you. I think you deserve to know this. Were they dating each other actively,

like while I was dating this person? Well, so Lucy and Irwin were together. They would break up, get back together, break up. So Irwin and Lucy were actually broken up on a break when Irwin met our writer. So they technically weren't together. In this situation, I would absolutely break up with that person.

I would be like, thank God I caught this before I married them and how to child with them. So it's still, you would never be able to get past it. I don't know. I would be hard. I would be hard. I would definitely be fucking mad at both of them I don't know. I would be hard. I would be hard. I would definitely be fucking mad at both of them.

But I guess it's the question of, were you cheating on me or were you not? Was it that you were dating other people when we were first dating and not exclusive? Because that's, you know, a normal thing to do. Or was it that we were together, we were exclusive. And the last year you've been doing this. Right. Like when was the crime. When was the cutoff? Yeah. Yeah. No comments on the original post about any overlap.

Right. It's unclear if Lucy and Irwin hooked up again, or if it was like this bet. I mean. And that's all that ever was. And I think it's actually, well, and it's kind of shitty that Lucy didn't explain that further. Like, it's almost like she made it up. It just sounds crazy. Or she wanted to mentally destroy her friend

versus be like, blah, blah, blah. We didn't hook up after you guys started dating. It was just the bad. Yeah. Like, that makes it better in my head that at least then I didn't like get cheated on. They were like, your friend sucks. And your boyfriend maybe also sucks.

The person I'm gonna marry came to me with like the nastiest intentions. Like that's how we started our relationship. Even if he changed his mind, like that's still in him and that was like the foot we started on. I do think it would be so hard. I, I couldn't, I couldn't handle that. Your whole relationship has kind of started on

the law and the law. And there was certainly lies like longer than I would have I couldn't handle that. Your whole relationship has kind of started on the whole generation. There were a lot of lies, like longer than I would have expected, at least lying if there wasn't cheating, but probably cheating too. Yeah. Oh, that's so hard. And like they were laughing at me.

Like I was a joke to them. Yeah, that's not true. And like I'm supposed to trust this person as my life partner. Valid points. That's so true. If he really loved her, he would have told her. Yeah.

That is true. That's a big point. And he was unwilling. He never came, you thank God you brought that up because I didn't even think about that. He should have come clean at some point. So true. Because it's not like should your best friend have your back like that?

Yes. But should your heart partner? Yeah. That is so true. Yeah. And if he fully like realized how wrong that was and messed up and like was such a mistake and not in his actual character, he would have like five months in however long it was. I got to tell you, I need you to know this.

Yeah. After getting engaged to her, like you would always have that fear that it could come out. I feel well. And what's like to, I guess on that point point, what's to ensure that they don't resort back to their relationship? Yeah. Like, I guess it would be. If they're still hiding it.

Yeah. It just sounds crazy. I know that people do crazy things, but there is a part of me that's like, maybe this girl's just in love with her fiance. Like, I'm lying. And lying. Let's find out.

Oh my god, do we have the update? I's find out. We have the update. Oh my god, do we know? We have the update. I'm so invested. I just can't. You're like, let me sit up for this. Hi, everyone. I didn't expect this to blow up. When I wrote my original post, I was emotional.

Maybe that's why I have omitted some important facts. Oh, give it to us, please. Also, I am not a native English speaker. So maybe some stuff I wrote was lost in translation. Oh, it was HK Hong Kong, I was wondering. I think it sounds like that. I didn't know I didn't want to assume, but it's making sense now.

I also commented on my original post about my history with Lucy if you're interested. We are. We're going to, should we find that first? And we're very interested. We'll look at the, yeah. A little history of how Irwin and I met. We met at a company event.

My company was the host and his was one of our clients. We bonded over the after party and exchanged numbers. Days after he added me on Facebook, I actually saw that he and Lucy were mutual friends. So I asked him if they knew each other. He answered yes and they met during their internship days, but they weren't close. I asked Lucy too and she confirmed it too. So I didn't make a big deal out of it. We began casually dating.

No labels just seen where things went. I knew that he had been seen someone else at this time as was I. But when we admitted to wanting to make things official with us, we broke off with our casual flings and the rest is history. I appreciate everyone who reached out. Thank you for the kind messages. And it made me realize to think of my situation logically and so I did.

And yes, Erwin and I have talked. I picked him up from the airport yesterday and told him about Lucy's confessions. He went pale, but he was calm. He told me to ask everything I want to know and he will answer truthfully. It was true. I'll try to summarize here.

One, did he know that I was Lucy's best friend when we met? No. They didn't talk much about their personal lives when they were together. But he knows that Lucy's best friend's name is my name. But when we met, he didn't really put the pieces together. Two, how long were they dating before we met? He did not keep count because they were on again, off again, but they were casually seeing each other

for around four months before we met. And in his mind, they were never official as they didn't label their relationship. But he wanted to be. He did try to pursue her, but she kept messing up with his head. So when she allowed him to date, when they were on a break, he thought of it as a way out. Did they really bet on me?

Yes. But he did not take it seriously. He also did not initiate it. Ooh. Four, when did the bet happen? It happened days after I introduced him as friend to Lucy. He admitted that since we were still not exclusively dating, he still sees Lucy. Lucy initiated the bet and if he does win, she will know that he is mature enough to seriously

date. What? Five, when did their relationship end? A month or so before we made our relationship official. He already broke things off with Lucy because he was starting to fall for me. Lucy took it well and did not ever bring up the bet again. Six, why all of a sudden did Lucy bring up the bet? Lucy started bringing it up after we made our engagement official.

He admitted to have forgotten about the bet until she reminded him of it. So when Lucy reached out to come clean, he refused because he didn't really think that it was a serious bet. Seven is he aware of Lucy's feelings? No. He genuinely thinks that Lucy is happy for us. First of all, that's a hate or ask for. I'm not believing him. I'm really, like you did, he was dating someone and never saw her photos with her best friend. Like he was never seen, like he had never seen this woman before, never heard of her. Just like

vaguely knew the name. And he wanted to make it, like, I don't know. I don't know. She's talking about Facebook though. Like maybe this was like 2007. Well, I kind of believe her. I kind of do too. I think there's so many people nowadays that aren't on social media and they met so organically in the wild that maybe they didn't creep on socials, like meeting someone online and finding their Instagram

and scrolling for the last four years of their life. And maybe she's got a comment. Maybe her name's like Kelly and there's like a hundred Kelly. Yeah, you know, I don't know that I would necessarily put it together. Well, and like with that too, if English isn't first language, HK is Hong Kong. I have a lot of friends that came from like China or the Philippines and they don't go by their actual name. Like, my friend has a traditional Chinese name, but her name is Ellen. And so like maybe socials were hard to find

and you know whatever, but Michaela, what were you gonna say? Well, I just don't know, like some of his comments were just downplaying and he's like, well, she wanted to come clean to you, but I didn't even remember that that happened and I didn't think it was serious. Like that's not even the problem.

It was like all of the fact that you dated, like that is significant. Like so much of it was significant that he's acting like all it was was I didn't take the bet seriously. So why would I tell you? But I do think that like, I wouldn't have,

I mean, if you're in like a toxic relationship that you're trying to get away from, and somebody says something like that to you, I don't know that I would have thought it was real, especially if I broke up with them, and they were supposedly cool with it. And I wouldn't have thought twice about it. I think it is fucked up that he didn't say

that they never told her that they had dated. I think that that's a wrong thing. But I don't think he's wrong for not thinking that that was a serious thing. And I think it's a Hater Us friend to think that that she's she's done. She's done. Haterass friend. She's done. I'm still not sold on her win.

I'm going to tell you all these bitches fight over her win. I don't know. Like, it's it's sketchy to me. It's still very sketchy to me. I have a little bit more, okay? Right now, I don't know where to go from here. I believe him, but I just don't like the idea that the foundation of our relationship is from a bet.

Whether it be serious or not, it's still not good. Can we rebuild trust from here? I don't know, but I'm willing to try. Aside from this issue, Erwin has been a great boyfriend and I don't want to make a harsh decision about us and regret it in the end. What I do know now is that we need to call off the wedding. He told me that he'll understand if I don't want to go out with the wedding anymore, but he asked me to consider our relationship because he loves me and he'll do anything to regain my trust back.

Also, yeah. Well, and the wedding was supposed to be in two days, too. So like it's the 17th, it was on the 19th. So maybe there will be an update that they didn't call it off. That's a good, that's a good compromise. I don't think they should get married like so soon after something like that happening. I appreciate that they're gonna think about it

and like not immediately break up but also not get married. I feel like that was the right choice. I also learned that Lucy actually tried to contact Irwin days after the Bachelor at party, but Irwin missed her calls. She's still not reaching out to me, but I don't care anymore. Many of you say that she's sabotaging our relationship.

This is her last ditch effort to have Irwin by herself, and I think you're right. It just hurts that our 11 years of friendship have to end this way. So there, I think this will also be my last update. Everything from here on will be Irwin's and I think this will also be my last update. Everything from here on will be Irwin's and I's decisions. Thank you everyone for listening. And to everyone who things I made the story up, I wish I did. I guess real life is stranger than fiction. I'll be watching cruel intentions and dangerous liaisons this weekend. Oh, I think she is a mature person and I appreciate that.

I think Lucy was obviously trying to sabotage them, but I also think she deserved to know that information. I just think she deserved to know it earlier and her husband should have told her. There has been a large adult there. She should have. I will. It's got you to make it hard.

I will say it's hard though. And I think like Ellie kind of made a point on it. When someone's already really messing with your head, it could have it could have been such an offhand comment where it's like, well you're dating my friend now. If you get her to marry you, like we could date seriously actually. And if it's just like this offhand comment, it might not have even registered. It might have been like a here's Lucy fucking with me again.

Right. Like, you know, so I will say, like, do I want an updated year from now knowing what happened? Absolutely, because time, only time will tell the type of person Erwin actually is. But I will say, like this definitely feels like very bad intentions from Lucy for the most part. I just think he should have told her about

like the relationship existing and like, even if it wasn't offhand, comment and like that didn't stand out to him. Just like, obviously there were communications that were had about her and knowing that they were, I don't know, there were things that were definitely held secret that should have been communicated. Whether the bets the most important part of it or not. Yeah. I guess at the time that they agreed to be official

because they were both, like they were both seen other people on the side. He was seen Lucy a little bit, but did call it off a month before they became official, which I do find some value in. Because he was like, well, I'm not even official with this girl, but I'm getting serious. I like her by Lucy. Yeah.

But I guess at that time when they became official, probably, I don't know. Even before that, would it be good to know right away? Yeah. I also think it's weird because they were friends for 11 years. I would be uncomfortable with my friend starting hookup with someone that I'm still seeing.

Yeah. Like I would have been like, hey, I know you guys happen to like randomly meet at your work, but just so you know, like I have been- Anything right now, I know you guys happen to like randomly meet at your work, but just so you know, like, I have been- Anything right now. I have been casually seeing him. Because I'm sure our writer would've called it off. Yes.

Our writer never would've gotten into that from the jump because she sounds like she's a good friend. I think that the couple can potentially move on from this as long as there's truly nothing else, but I do think she's gonna have a bit more of a critical eye about certain things, now knowing that information about how things started. Yeah.

Whoa. What a sneaky friend. Oh my God. Nightmare. Like was she enjoying, like was she not telling her if she was nervous about it, or was she not telling her because she was enjoying it? You have to think that it was something like that. I think it was nervous about it or was she not telling her because she was enjoying it. You had to think that it was something like that.

I think it was a power trip and this screams, I want what I can't have. They're official, they're getting engaged. The wedding is two weeks away. Also, why not? I mean, Irwin said she did approach him right after their engagement became official to come clean. So she was already trying to do it then.

But like you had from engagement to the bachelor at party to tell your friend and you're doing it two weeks before the wedding. Yeah. Girl, I get like both the husband and friend maybe like now it's been like I should have told her earlier, but now it's been so long that it's almost like worse to say it now. Like I can understand being stuck like that, but oh my God, the amount of stress I would have keeping that secret and not like sharing it for years. That would be too much.

I wouldn't be able to do it. Yeah. I can barely tell people like I can barely keep secret what people are getting for Christmas like the minute the minute someone gets like a gift delivered to me. I'm like okay open it now I don't I don't care for you to wait. I'm like call Hanukkah. Let's go. We celebrate that too Like just open it because I want people I'm like I'm excited Giff giving is my love language. I excel at giving gifts. So it's like, just do it. Like go, sort of keep something like this from your best friend. Psychotic. Like actually, psychotic.

That would really fuck me up. That would really fuck me. You'd have trust issues. They really really should have said something right away. Yeah. I think so. Keep us posted if you're out there. Yeah, let us know.

Let us know. Okay. Another one of this week's partners is Hynakin is zero zero. Hynakin zero zero is an alcohol free option to the original Hynakin you love. I myself am doing dry January, January 17th, still going strong, a couple more weeks to go, and I'm really proud of myself. I myself have really questioned my relationship with alcohol, and I think it's something that a lot of us might be doing But I still want to go out. I still want to have fun. I want something good to sit on and that's where hanyacan00 comes in

There's a time and a place for everything. You might have something big the next day But you still want to go out with your friends. You don't want FOMO. Hanyacan00 would be a perfect drink that night. Hanyacan00 has 100% taste but 0.0% alcohol. So it means it's perfect for all the times you might want to beer or want to go out and have fun, but can't or don't want the alcohol. I recently had a friend's birthday party and I'm doing dry January, so while everyone else is ripping shots and having fun, I just wanted something good to sip on, but I didn't have an option. I wish I would have had Heineken 00 that night.

Heineken 00. 100% taste is 0.0% alcohol, only 69 calories. Now you can. Click the link in our show notes to buy now. Must be 21 plus to purchase. Please enjoy I can responsibly. Well, that one was crazy. That one was crazy.

Like that one I just can't believe people like that. I mean, I can't believe people like that exist, but like, whoa. I know. That's what this Reddit is for. It really is. And this next one, because it's kind of, it's kind of a delicate situation.

And I don't know if there's necessarily exact black and white right wrong. Little gray area, so. Okay, let's get into it. This one is coming from our very own to how it takes subreddit. It's 12 days old. It's titled, Would I Be the Asshole for cutting off my dad and his wife? If they planned on being buried together instead of my dad,

being buried with my late mom. Oh. That's tough. This is tough, yeah. My mom passed on when I was 14 years old. My dad moved on and married my stepmother five years later. I've always missed how romantic my dad and mom were. They had a wonderful marriage. What really made me insecure was the fact that my stepmom used to be my dad's long-term

ex in high school, who reconnected when she passed, and they got together. My dad had told my mom that they broke up due to long distance. The fact that they had pre-established history before my mom even came into the picture always made me insecure. At their wedding, speeches were made idolizing their love. How they were each others first

and going to be each others' last. It felt like a job at my mom's memory, even though there was nothing wrong with it, and my stepmom was mostly cool with how things were, but it didn't stop me from believing that my mom was being seen as a placeholder for my dad's current wife. I may have a small grudge against what she said

at their wedding. Quote, we found each other again after all this time. It was destiny for us to be together. Isn't that disrespectful to my mom? However, my dad was completely swooning over that. Recently, I got to know my dad has made the decision to change his burial spot. And now is making plans to get buried with my stepmom. This made me really upset, and I screamed at them both, because it felt heartless of my dad that my mom is buried all alone. We had a family meeting, and my dad told me that stepmom is his life partner now, and it is important for him to honor the vows he made to her,

and the fact that she has been far longer in his life as his wife than my mom was. I have a reason to believe my stepmom initiated this discussion as well, but I can't confirm that. I haven't spoken to them ever since, and I'm planning to cut both of them off. Am I the asshole? This makes me so sad.

I'm pissed for her. Yeah. I don't think he's like being an asshole, but there's just no way those things wouldn't hurt Like there's no way those comments like about destiny. It's like so my mother's death was the desk Like that was fate bringing for you together that like that and I I'm sure they didn't mean it but also like how could you not think of that when you're saying it like he's allowed to move on and Find love and that's a beautiful thing

But like just the lack, it's just the lack of care that like your child, like no respect for the love that your child had for their mother. I think that is disgusting because it does, it does feel like that. It feels like, oh, so my mom had to die for you guys to get your happy ending. Right. Like they're almost saying, like this story was destined by fate and this is such an incredible love story about how we found each other after like we couldn't be together because of distance and like we're able to, I don't know. It's kind of bullshit. And like this happens a lot, I think with like widows and like at

least on Reddit that I see and like other new partners coming in and kind of discrediting that one that's passed. How easy would it have been to instead be like, our past took us apart. And you had a great, you know, amazing ex-wife who tragically passed, but you have a beautiful daughter. And I'm just so grateful that we now get to share our love. Yeah, in the second half of your life type thing. Yeah.

You guys didn't work out the first time. Who's to say that you only work out now because of how he grew as a person because of the wife that passed? And they were together for at least 14 years if she passed when the daughter was 14 years old. Like that's a long way to live. Yeah.

That's a significant time. That's a lot to discredit. It's really shitty. Really shitty. I don't know, I have a hard time. Like, I don't think he's an asshole, but I, because like I get it, he's in love and like he's happy that he's marrying someone.

But it just feels maybe negligent again, is the word to not think of how those things would affect them. I don't know about the burial thing either. Like I don't know how to feel about that. I know. Like because either way one of the women will be buried alone probably. Well why should that be the case? Why can't the three of them get buried together?

That was my thought. I think that that's fine. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that the past wife would want him to never move on and find happiness. I don't think like she would find it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would be cool with it. I don't think that would, no, no. Barrel plot, yeah. Then nobody's alone.

Yeah, like my partner wants to get fucking launched in a rocket in outer space. Like I might be alone. Like fuck, like you're, you're dead. I don't, I don't know, I agree. But like it is like, it's sad to think about, I think, as a child, I would, I would be really bummed about that. Well, it's so scary when someone passes to feel like they're farther away from you and

their memory is getting farther and farther away. And I feel like all of these things that her father and his new wife are doing, make it seem like she never existed at all, which is just like everyone's greatest fear. And that's feeding into it at a level that's just like so painful. Yeah. And it's just, it's so hard losing a parent. And like, I think for girls, there's so many big events in our lives, especially if you choose to have kids like that you need your mom for.

Like, there's this audio going around right now. And it's like, it's like a, oh, it's just literally makes you cry when you hear it. But it's like this audio where it's like where you just want your mom and like she's gone. And it's like someone like screaming the audio, like it's really fucked up. And it's like, she's probably dealing with that because by this point, she's, you know, 30-ish, maybe even older. She should get buried with her mom. Her and like whoever she may have family

with her mom. Have family plots, but everyone together. Yeah. If you're energy is stuck in the ground down there, like make it a party at least. Where do you guys think we go and what you die? I think it's like kind of a video game type situation where I'll like go back up to wherever it is

that we go in the fifth dimension or whatever. And I'm like, oh, like what kind of life do I want to choose this time? And then I like plug in and like go back through. I'm kind of a reincarnation person. Or I think that you don't really know that you're going through again, but you almost like never,

you know you're dying when you're a person. Yeah. But then you wake up and don't realize you died. Because you ever hear about those kids who like remember their past lives and stuff. Oh, yes. It's so easy. There's a good Netflix show. Yes. I made me watch it.

Oh, yeah. I fully believe in that. Yeah, I think fully believe in that. I think you die and then you open your eyes and you're somebody else. I think there's a little. I'm a member. My only difference is there's an in-between time where you can kind of like float around a little bit. And so that too.

Hang out and then be like, okay, this era sounds fun. I'm gonna go again. I think it's more comforting to me to think that like you're never really gone. Yeah. I feel like we have all these science things too, where it's like energy is not created or destroyed. So it's like, we definitely go somewhere.

Yeah. But our consciousness is like so freaky. And if you think about our internal thoughts, like I wish I could just read animals minds. Like, I'm like, then it makes me so sad how mean we are to animals. And then I just like go down this rabbit hole. I'm just like, this is terrible.

This is whole thing. Yeah, do you guys ever watch? It's German and I will butcher the name, but it's it's pronounced like Kurs Gazette. What's it on? Oh, I certainly haven't, but what's it? What's it on? I love to hear about it. It's spelled like this. It's on YouTube. Oh, you got that fast. Kurs Gazette. Yeah. Gazette. It's good. Um, nice. So they have this theory. They call it the egg theory. And it kind of is like a video game hybrid

that you guys are kind of putting together, but watch it. It's literally called the egg theory. They have a full video on it, and it just kind of explains our energy, and it essentially gets really crazy, but it's like everyone on your planet is you just like at different times.

Like you're like reincarnated like into every person. You're just different versions of yourself. Like it's so crazy. That's a very Buddhist idea where it's like, I'm gonna have empathy for everybody cause at one point I've been them and at one point I'll be them again. Buddhist is so cool.

Yeah. I love that. It's really cool. Religion's crazy. I know, I would love to just study every religion in my free time. You should have been. I know.

What is that a theology major? I think that it's actually a theology major. Free time. There's your gonna have that. That's not work. There you go. I refuse to call it anything but Twitter stuff. Yeah, no, I never will.

Oh, no, I was talking about edX, which is a site for taking classes. My boat was like, no, I don't call it edX. I didn't think so. I was like, no, I'm hearing things over here. I'm glad we cleared that up because so many people would have thought I was calling it edX. And that just feels like a personality trait to be claiming it does to do that. There's no comments. I can look up from OP. It appears their account has been suspended. What the? Sorry. No, it's annoying. They might have violated too many of Reddit's rules

on other subreddits. Reddit has rules. So many rules. Ah, hmm. But the top comment is like very thoughtful advice. I'm sorry for your loss. My mom passed when I was 15 after a long battle with cancer.

My dad remarried two years later. That felt like a slap in the face as his love with my mom sounded much like your parents love. I was 15 after a long battle with cancer. My dad remarried two years later. That felt like a slap in the face as his love with my mom sounded much like your parents love. As I've gotten older, I've come to grips with those feelings and accepted that my dad probably started processing her death upon diagnosis. I was too young to comprehend.

She had been given a death sentence. 25 years later, my sister found out that he still owned the grave site next to my mom and was unsure if he wanted to be buried there. My sister's and I chatted and came to understand that this also didn't sit terribly well with us. He has a wife who's been married to longer than my mom, wouldn't this be a slap in the face to the one still living?

At the end of the day, there's no winners in either decision and ultimately our fathers need to make that choice themselves and consider the feelings of their living spouse. Wow. This is such a sad one. This is like, it's really hitting. Like that makes a lot of sense. It's a very thoughtful response. Yeah, because can you imagine being the second wife and being like, but like what about

me? Right. I'm only here. Especially he said that they've been married longer. Yeah. Or in each other's lives longer. Right. I'm only here, especially he said that they've been married longer. Yeah. Or in each other's lives longer. Yeah. However that because of childhood, I think they just get buried together. They should all in a polycule. Yeah. Yes. I love the word polycule. I will say, though, if that happened to my mother, I would get buried next to her. And whoever else could just also be in that area. Yeah. Either OP, like our writer gets buried next to her. And whoever else could just also be in that area.

Yeah, either OP, like our writer gets buried next to mom with her partner or dad and second wife, which the next comment after the first, like one we just read, my great, great grandfather is buried between his first and second wives. He was a widower and remarried. So it's been done.

I see, it's doable. It's doable. We can throw in the it's been done. I see, it's doable. It's doable. We can throw in the cremated dog. I'm just so. Oh my god. I'm a full circle. Full circle. Michaela, you brought it back.

You brought it back. Well, that is all I have for us on this episode. Oh, it's so good, Morgan. Thank you guys for being here. I owe you so much gratitude. And not at all. I'm so appreciative of you coming on this humble little show. you guys were being here. I owe you so much gratitude. Not at all. I'm so appreciative of you coming on this humble little show.

No, it's incredible to be here. I'm honored to be here. Where can people find you guys and your podcast? It's called Late Night Drive with Ellie and Michaela. You can get that anywhere you listen to podcasts. All the places. It's so good. I got to listen to two episodes last night.

And great combo. You keep a pop and flow in. Thank you. Good topics. And you even have a little song that you sing at the end. So if you liked the singing at the beginning, you're definitely going to want to hear this jingle. It's so hard to not jingle.

I am really a big jingle. You are. Then you are. And it's what makes you so special to me. The jingle. It's so hard to not jingle. I am really a big jingle. You are. Then you are. And that's what makes you so special to me. The jingle. Everyone likes a good song, everyone's in a while. Except I have one YouTube commenter. I should find it.

But they literally told me like, I would sing. I'd be like, move in along. And then we'd be like, stop singing everything. I'm just like, yeah, I don't know. I don't like that. I don't like that. Or when we do'm just like, you know, I don't know, find some joy maybe. Or when we do accents, like some people hate it, but some people enjoy it. Your accent you did yesterday?

Was so good. She's so good at accents. Oh, the Australian one, yeah. She's so good at accents. Well, I'm just imitating Dr. Chase on house. I'm not doing anything like what it was. It was the house episode, which I love that show, but they were a little ruthless. It was a little crazy.

Yeah, I can't believe they actually kissed. She, that grown-ass man, Kirsten, I'm your old. So weird. If you wanna know what we're talking about, it was weird to go listen to their podcast. That's such a good teaser. But thank you guys. We are on tour.

There's only a few tickets left at a few shows, like everything's selling out. So stop waiting. Don't rely on anyone else to get your tickets, because I've sadly gone a couple messages from people that like my boyfriend was supposed to buy my tickets and he didn't get them in time. And there's not second shows coming for a lot of them now.

And it's just like I feel heartbroken for this person So don't wait get your tickets Merch is on sale show up in the merch if you do you might get a prize So be ready be ready, but other than that there's some amazing content on patreon this month And thank you to honeykin zero zero Making a dry January very easy for me. Other than that, until next time guys, bye! you