Two Hot Takes - 166: Trying to Have a Good Time.. Ft. Zane and Heath Unfiltered

Episode Date: May 19, 2024

WE'RE ON TOUR !!! : https://linktr.ee/twohottakestour Link for Google Form if you're attending one of our shows: https://forms.gle/A9WkQAci26LhMZjs5 Two Hot Takes host, Morgan, is joined by guests Z...ane Hijazi and Heath Hussar from Zane and Heath: Unfiltered! This episodes stories have people that seem to just want to have a good time.. but things are not going according to plan. Cue the YTA and NTA debates! We're going to need your help on these ones :) Checkout Zane and Heath! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCzd_-4U78H3VBicGIPuwPFw https://www.instagram.com/zaneandheath/?hl=en MERCH IS HERE ! https://shop.twohottakes.com I can't wait to see you all in these, especially at our live shows!! Our PO Box!! Two Hot Takes. 5042 Wilshire BLVD. #470. Los Angeles, CA 90036 Bonus Content on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/TwoHotTakes Our SubReddit to Submit YOUR Stories!!! https://reddit.app.link/twohottakes Full length Video episodes available on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/TwoHotTakes Partners: Gametime: Hero Bread: Heineken 0.0: Zocdoc: 

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Starting point is 00:00:00 What happens when 20 extremely athletic Canadians who thrive on competition and won't settle for less than number one find themselves on a team? Taking on jaw-dropping obstacles all across Canada is one thing. Working together on a team with some pretty big personalities is another. It's a new season of Canada's Ultimate Challenge and sparks are gonna fly. New episodes Sundays. Watch free on CBC Gym. Okay, are we ready? Ready.
Starting point is 00:00:32 We are rolling. Mic's hot. All right. Ready to go. I'm ready. We're ready. I'm so excited to have you guys today. Yeah, thank you for having us.
Starting point is 00:00:40 I have been doing a little research, like looking up the lore and you guys have been on YouTube for a little bit. And then I was like looking up your podcast description and this cracked me up. Oh, we haven't changed it since we put it. Oh, no, please. Oh, is this like one that we have for our show? It's the IMBD one. I don't think you guys did it. Oh, okay. No, no. Zayn and Heath Unfiltered, a weekly podcast from YouTube sensations Zayn and Heath, two uneducated Florida boys with strong opinions and nothing to back it up. Zane and Heath unfiltered, a weekly podcast from YouTube sensations, Zane and Heath, two
Starting point is 00:01:05 uneducated Florida boys with strong opinions and nothing to back it up. Do we have strong opinions? I don't know. Well, we definitely don't have anything to back it up. Did you guys write that or is that IMBD like giving us synopsis? No, somebody that we know wrote that a long time ago. When we- Yeah, somebody that worked like worked for the show, our friend, we just didn't know what to say.
Starting point is 00:01:26 So we just try to make it as shocking as possible. We didn't want to be held accountable for anything we said. So we thought that would protect us. And it hasn't. No. Yeah. I don't think most people don't even know what that intro exists. A lot of things we say aren't factual. So we just don't want to be held to that standard.
Starting point is 00:01:46 I should start saying that about this show. They're all opinions. But we should definitely just like, we don't need an intro. If they want to know who we are, they can listen to an episode. Yeah. Give us an hour and a half of your time
Starting point is 00:01:57 and you'll find out. After we're done, we should just delete that one. Yeah, thanks for bringing it up. We'll get rid of it. No, it's so good. I loved it. It's what sold me. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, okay, cool. I was like, bringing it up. We'll get rid of it. No, it's so good. I loved it. It's what sold me.
Starting point is 00:02:05 Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, okay, cool. I was like, this sounds fun. And then I listened to an episode and like, you guys are just like, you just want to have a good time. Yeah. That's the vibe I get.
Starting point is 00:02:14 Like we talked, oh, not we, but you guys talked about like the little cereal cup bowl thing that someone, are you TikTok shoppers? He's addicted. I'm not addicted to TikTok shop. I've bought maybe like three, four things since it's all started, like are you TikTok shoppers? He's addicted. I'm not addicted to TikTok shop. I've bought maybe like three, four things since it's all started, like the whole TikTok shop.
Starting point is 00:02:29 I'm really bad. Nobody ever admits to addiction. I'm really bad with it. And it's just too easy. So I need the link for the cereal cup you were talking about. Absolutely, yeah. It sounded really good.
Starting point is 00:02:40 Or you know, TikTok is so easy. You just type in cereal cup and it'll be the first thing on the top. Cereal cup, TikTok shop. And do you guys always buy it through the link that you found it on? Like the- No. Yeah, I don't even- I go find it on Amazon myself.
Starting point is 00:02:53 You don't wanna give them the referral? I don't wanna give them that coupon or whatever it is. Okay. If they give a good review, then I'll help them out. But if it's some bullshit ass, like the flosser ones, the kid's like, look, this works. And he spit out a bunch of dirt and it wasn't a joke. I was like, okay, I actually need a flosser,
Starting point is 00:03:09 but I'm not gonna buy through this. Like, cause it was, he's obviously lying. I will say I am very upset because I used to go to TikTok all the time to like look up genuine reviews of products. And it used to be people just doing it for, you know, the sake of talking about the product. And you would get like an honest review. Yeah. And now anytime I do it, it's just like people getting paid on the side from like referral codes or whatever and I just don't trust it.
Starting point is 00:03:31 Very convoluted now. You have to go back to YouTube for those reviews now. Yeah. Yeah. But I am a, I'm an avid Amazon purchaser. That's where my, my money goes. I love that. Okay. Well, let's get into this theme today. Just trying to have a good time. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:47 She is chill. I love how soft-smoking you are. Yes. Very pleasing to the ear. Okay, good. Our voices are not, so sorry for everybody listening. No, you have beautiful voices. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:03:59 Beautiful. I'm gonna try headphones. Oh. I wanna hear her voice. Especially during the reading. Yeah, I feel. Oh. I want to hear her voice. Especially during the reading. Yeah, I feel like I want to. Today, we are going to be going over a couple topics. Hear it through the viewers.
Starting point is 00:04:12 They're like, flippable. All right, I'm strapped in. Okay, so this first one, it's coming from our very own Too Hot Takes subreddit, three days old, titled, I accidentally got into bed with my father-in-law. Hot. My father-in-law is staying with us for a few days. We gave him our room while he's here. It's bigger and we just felt it's the right thing to do. Last night he went to bed and my wife and I were downstairs watching TV and drinking. She went up a while later too, and I said I'd be up soon.
Starting point is 00:05:04 I was getting pretty tipsy at this point. As I went upstairs, sleepiness and my tipsy state meant I forgot that my father-in-law was in our room. I entered the room and got naked, which is how I sleep. I saw a figure curled up in bed and got next to it, wrapping my arms around what I thought was my wife to see if she was up for sex. He's a light sleeper and turned around immediately, saying, quote, Chris? Oh my fucking God. I jumped out and fell to the floor. It was dark, and for some reason, I decided to get dressed there rather than just run to the guest room where my wife was. I stumbled over my clothes and somehow
Starting point is 00:05:44 got them back on. By the time he got the table lamp on and was just looking to the guest room where my wife was. I stumbled over my clothes and somehow got them back on. By the time he got the table lamp on and was just looking at me with a what the fuck expression. I said sorry and went to my wife. I didn't wake her up. I just got up this morning and I'm typing this in bed with a massive hangover and a father-in-law who I tried to spoon,
Starting point is 00:06:00 probably talking shit about me to my wife downstairs. I have to go downstairs at some point. Any idea what to do or how to address it? Before we continue. I'm, I was so confused by the story because I thought I was hearing it from the girls perspective, but it sounds like I'm hearing from the guys. So he got into bed with, with the father-in-law, a guy. I feel like you can at least you can smell that it's not your wife.
Starting point is 00:06:26 Yeah. It's so... I think you can easily... If I'm climbing into bed, I can smell if it's either you or my wife. I don't even have to get into bed. You got enough wine in you with my back turned, show a little shoulder, you might not catch it. Yeah, but you know, the hairs and shit, I would kind of see it. You know, I would... But it's dark in there. It was pitch black by the sounds catch it. You know the hairs and shit. I would kind of see it. It's dark in there. It was pitch black by the sounds of it.
Starting point is 00:06:50 Wine drunk, right? The damage is done. No mention of the type of liquor. It's pretty tipsy. You said the damage is... Do you think it's over for everybody? Irrecoverable. You think so? No. Divorce. Yeah, it's... Divorce. Yeah, that's the end of the road right there.
Starting point is 00:07:08 No, genuine advice. I really would have no idea what to do in this situation. It's kind of one of those things you don't know until you're in it. Luckily, it's not like super, super horrible. I mean, I would feel more uncomfortable if it was the mother-in-law. Yeah. So, he got lucky on that. He did.
Starting point is 00:07:26 Genuine, honest mistake, you know? I won't say it happens, cause it doesn't. But I mean, it also depends on how aggressive he was with making the moves, you know? I mean- That does matter. Spooned up, if you're reaching around trying to, I mean, you wake up to that.
Starting point is 00:07:41 That's pretty startling. Well, also like, what if he went in there with a boner and then the guy felt it on his back. That's another thing. That's assault. That's the contact we need in this. I feel like you got to play it off and just be like, hey John, really sorry about last night. I guess this is why we shouldn't give you our room.
Starting point is 00:08:01 Guest bedroom next time buddy. And I think it all depends on the person too. The person that like climbed into bed, like what type of person is he? Is he always doing this type of shit? Is this gonna be a risk in the future? Does he have a history of disloyalty? You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:08:19 I think it all depends on the type of person. Like I feel like if that happened to me, I think very quickly I would have, we would have all been able to get over it. We would have laughed about it, ha ha, and then that's it. Yeah. My dad would have been that way too. Like my dad has such a crude sexual sense of humor. He would have just rolled over and been like,
Starting point is 00:08:39 what, you want a kiss? Like he would have like fucked with my fiance in a way. And so I don't think this is that big of a deal depending on who they are. Yeah, just crack a joke. It's kind of harmless. You gotta laugh about it. Mother-in-law, I think a little bit more serious.
Starting point is 00:08:56 And I don't think the husband would have been very happy about that at all. It would have taken him a little bit of time to get over that. Yeah, yeah. Top comment, walk into the room, kiss your wife, and ask if he wants a morning kiss too after last night. It's a good way to joke it off.
Starting point is 00:09:10 You gotta go in lighthearted. Can't be too embarrassed, you know, stuff happens. But if you're keeping it silent, especially the first 10 minutes of seeing each other, what's really going on? It's gonna seem like he was making an advance on him. Yeah, yeah, you gotta play it off. Otherwise Otherwise it doesn't seem like the accident it was. In any situation like that too, any situation like that where you think it's someone else,
Starting point is 00:09:31 immediately you got to tell everybody around you. Have you ever done something similar? No. No? No, not at all. Oh, no, I have. I have. I have. With David Alvarez. Oh, this is pretty funny. No, I have. I have. I have. With David Alvarez. Oh, this is pretty funny. So we were at a birthday party and we were at a venue that was very,
Starting point is 00:09:51 it's just very dark. I'm also drunk. And I thought I was kissing another girl, not my girlfriend, just another girl. Okay. And ended up being my friend's girlfriend. Oh no. Did he care? Well, I immediately apologized. As soon as I saw it wasn't her, I freaked out, immediately apologized,
Starting point is 00:10:12 but he definitely laughed it off. He was like, Zane, you're an idiot. Okay, yeah. But yeah, I think he brings that up at least once a month. Yeah, for sure. Really? I think that means it cuts deep. once a month. Yeah. Really? I think that means it cuts deep.
Starting point is 00:10:26 He played it off. When you overly joke about it. I don't know. Sensing a little jealousy, you know? Something's up with it. He's definitely a little hurt. Maybe she talks about that kiss. Maybe.
Starting point is 00:10:38 I don't know. We should get us in a podcast and we should talk about it. Yeah, they should. Because we have not talked about that publicly yet. They should open up about that. Yeah. There you go. Now you got another episode. Am I the problem?
Starting point is 00:10:48 You might be. I mean, you're the one that did it. You can write in on our subreddit. Okay. Oh, like, I'd be like anonymous. You should make that entry. Yeah, you could. Give it a shot.
Starting point is 00:10:59 Okay, moving along to the next one. You recently got engaged, Heath, didn't you? I did. Congratulations. Thank you very much. We have a lot, it's like wedding season and engagement season right now. So we've got a lot of those today. But this next one, her fiance is a little odd.
Starting point is 00:11:16 It's coming from tuhatics subreddit titled, my fiance is upset with me over how I rejected another man during a night out. How she rejected him. Okay. My fiance and I are both in our 30s. We've been together for four years, getting married in a few months. I totally adore him and I think we have a good relationship overall.
Starting point is 00:11:37 We go out a lot because we both love music. We have a great community of friends and we see them pretty often at shows. We were at a show last night and I was standing with a girlfriend while my fiancé was outside with a few guys. For context, I was very much a weird girl in high school, but from my mid-20s on, I'd say I'm pretty conventionally attractive. On an average night out to hear music, I generally get approached or hear passing comments from men three to five times. Frankly, I'm 33 and it's not something I find very fun or enjoyable anymore. When men are polite about it, I am too, and polite dudes usually take my gentle rejection well and so that's not an issue
Starting point is 00:12:17 usually. However, that was not the case last night. A guy approached my friend and pointed at me, saying something I couldn't hear. My friend shakes her head at him and says, no. He seemingly not willing to take the hint, comes over to me and says, quote, my friend wants your autograph and points to a guy over by the bar. I laugh because what the fuck?
Starting point is 00:12:40 I said, what? And he repeated himself. My friend wants your autograph because you're very pretty. I said, no, thanks. I'm good. He asked a third time. My internal polite response clock had run out. I said, okay, $60 cash or cash up. He looks surprised and then sort of laughs and says, how about we buy you a drink? And I said, hmm, price just went up to a hundred dollars. You still want it? And he shook his head and went back to his friend at the bar.
Starting point is 00:13:09 My girlfriend and I had a laugh about what a totally bizarre way to hit on someone that was, and that was that. Later in the night, when we were all together again after the show, my friend told everyone the story. My fiance got really quiet and was kind of standoffish the rest of the night. When we got home, he asked why I hadn't told him about that interaction. Honestly, he has gotten a bit insecure in the past about these things, and we had specifically agreed I would avoid telling him about dudes hitting on me. So I reminded him of that. He was still really quiet and sulky, and eventually I asked him what was going on.
Starting point is 00:13:46 He said he didn't like how I handled it. He said it sounded like I was flirting and egging the guy on with my responses. Long story short, we argued about it. We do not see eye to eye on it, and things still kind of feel tense today, but we haven't discussed it further. I understand my fiance struggles with anxiety and can get insecure and worried. I always want to do what I can to support him and remind him I love him, but I don't think I did anything wrong here. Was my response flirty or inappropriate?
Starting point is 00:14:15 In my eyes, I was intentionally fucking with a guy who is being pushy and disrespectful, and I'm 100% okay with that. First of all, can we take a second? Both of these entries are so well written. I could never. It's her. Are you rewording these to sound really nice?
Starting point is 00:14:33 I do reword stuff on the fly. Oh, that's good. Okay. I try to read real fast. They sound so good. Do you want to take this or do you want me to take this? Yeah, I'll take it. First off, she told him that she would never tell him about any guy coming up to her because
Starting point is 00:14:51 he probably doesn't feel good about it. This probably happened in the past where he probably got aggressive or walked away or was just mad about it the whole night when she can't help it. If she's a pretty girl, guys are going to come up to her. She can't help it. Yeah, it is't help it. If she's a pretty girl, guys are gonna come up to her. She can't help it. Yeah, it is what it is. If there's a guy that's asked more than two, three times for a certain thing and she says no,
Starting point is 00:15:10 and he continues to do it, I think at that point, she has every right to do it in whatever way she finds fun. That to me was not flirty at all. To me, that was like an, like it was an asshole move, which I think what she was trying to be was an asshole, right? At that point, like kind of like, not difficult, but just like, like fuck you. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:30 Yeah. Like fuck off. Like give me some money or quit wasting my time. Fuck off. Like it was, it was, to me, it felt like a Blanton, fuck you. Like get away. Like you want my autograph? That's the weirdest pickup line I've ever heard. Like price went up to a hundred dollars.
Starting point is 00:15:45 And if he did, that's the thing. If he did have like a hundred lots, what, right there. Then she might've been fucked. She would've been fucked. She probably would've denied it. I could see her deny it. First of all, just goes to show the guy didn't want her that bad.
Starting point is 00:15:59 60 bucks, that's the deal. I will say, I can understand how it can come off as flirtatious hearing the story. Why wouldn't you just be like, no, I'm engaged, bye. It kind of egged it on in a way if you hear the story like that, obviously. He would know his fiance best and the way I guess it could have been said. I get it though, nobody wants to hear really, if your partner is being hit on constantly, it's just like a, okay, you want to be informed, but at the same time when you are informed,
Starting point is 00:16:33 you still kind of get like frustrated about it. So I get where he's coming from for that. And then also her being like, well, I just didn't want to come off as like rubbing it in your face type thing. So I totally understand that. And it's just, it's kind of disrespectful. You can bring it up to, if you get a hit on like quickly,
Starting point is 00:16:50 for you to go to your boyfriend and say that, that guy over there just hit on me. Just hit on me. What do you want him to do about it? It's like his reaction. Unless he like slapped your ass or something, that's when you should like notify your boyfriend, hey, he just like, he just touched me.
Starting point is 00:17:03 Just want to let you know that. Yeah, assaulted me. But there's no harm in somebody coming up to somebody and saying that they're pretty or asking for their phone number or something and then saying no and walking away. Yeah. It's not like if I want to know that or not.
Starting point is 00:17:16 I just don't need to know that because it's unimportant. It's literally a part of life. Yeah. And it's like ignorance is bliss too. That's why they agreed together. I'm not going to bring this up to you because it doesn't make you feel good. It makes you feel insecure. And that is tough.
Starting point is 00:17:31 Like if he's insecure and kind of feels like he's in this position of like he outkicked his coverage and his girlfriend's way hotter or fiance, whatever, is way hotter than what he thinks he's worthy of, any guy could be a threat. And like, that's exhausting. So no, why would she tell you? And it was inconsequential.
Starting point is 00:17:51 He walked away, went back to the bar, done. The friend only brought it up because she found it funny. Like, and it was such an odd pickup line. But it wasn't meant to be this like big ordeal. I'm also the same, like regardless of even if I felt like in her position, if she felt like she was right, she thinks his reaction is wrong. I'm also the person in the relationship to be like,
Starting point is 00:18:15 I personally didn't think so at the time and I did not mean for it to come across that way at all. If you think that that crossed the line or came across a certain way, I will never do that again. And I'm sorry that I upset you for that and I will handle it differently moving forward. Yeah. Regardless. I could be like, you know what? I didn't think it was that bad, but it made my partner feel that way. And I would never want them to feel that again.
Starting point is 00:18:38 Or I'd be like, just ask for more money next time, baby. And just split it with me. Yeah, right. A thousand bucks. There's the angel and the devil on the shoulders, right? Is the two of you? Yeah. I think that would be a really healthy response, especially like they're getting married. Yeah. This is going to be something that is going to continue to happen.
Starting point is 00:18:56 I mean, she said it happens three to five times a night when they go out. That's why he should just lock her in the room and never let her leave and go out. I think you just avoid it at all costs, right? I think that's the best approach. Yeah. Yeah, I think I'm so one to just communicate it out and be like, let's avoid this and never have this happen again.
Starting point is 00:19:16 Yeah. So the top comment, I liked your wording here. Internal polite response clock has run out. And that is like a good point too. Like when you're telling someone like, no, not interested and they don't take no for an answer, you have your friend advocating for you probably saying, no, she's, she's engaged or whatever it is. Like they're not taking the hint.
Starting point is 00:19:36 It's like, okay, at that point, like, fuck it, let's, let's go nuclear. My fuck budget just hit zero, baby. There's a bunch of other comments, people kind of being like, well, you didn't have to handle it that way. It was immature. So OP does give us some edits. Okay, y'all, goodness. Just want to add in two things because they're being mentioned a lot. First, my fiance is a great dude.
Starting point is 00:19:59 He is smart and fun and supportive in a million different ways. He is self-aware and he knows he's a bit anxious and struggles with insecurity. He's working on it. At the same time, I do have empathy about the discomfort of seeing your partner get hit on a bunch. It also makes me uncomfortable for the record.
Starting point is 00:20:16 Second, and I've discussed this with my fiance and he has expressed no issues with it, I don't know and I never have used my relationship status to reject men. If I say no, that's enough of an answer and if they don't respect that on its own, without my tie to another man, that's a problem. Also, I'm clearly wearing an engagement ring. If a guy approaches me, they either didn't care to look or saw and didn't give a hoot. And I do get her point. It is frustrating to have to be like, oh, well, I have a boyfriend.
Starting point is 00:20:48 And it's like a guy will respect that more so than just a no. Almost like the territory. Like, I'm not going to step on another guy's territory. But then again, a lot of guys are like, just because there's a goalie doesn't mean you can't like that type of- There's some of those out there for sure. Or it might like encourage them more to think that like... I don't know. People are weird.
Starting point is 00:21:11 But yeah, I get the whole fact like just no means no regardless of being like... Also sometimes I feel like the relationship thing could be like a cop-out answer. Which a lot of people use I feel. Yeah, I mean there's girls like it's a big thing now to wear engagement rings out to the bar, to like have an excuse to be just like, I'm engaged, even though they're not, and they're actually single. And as soon as they see a guy they like, they go, whoop, take it off.
Starting point is 00:21:34 It's good tactic. But that looks down a bad too. Imagine you're looking at a girl all night, you're like, oh, she's married, and then she takes her off. Literally. And then you go for a walk, talk to her, and I'm like, what?
Starting point is 00:21:42 This happened to a friend of mine. She was at Runyon and ran into this guy and she was wearing a graduation ring from her dad on her ring finger. And the guy kept looking at her and her hands and they really had this crazy chemistry on the hiking trail. And she ran in him again,
Starting point is 00:22:01 he didn't ask for her number that day. She ran in him again a week or two later and he was like, Hey, I noticed you're not wearing that ring today. Like I was going to hit on you last time, but notice you had a, you know, an engagement ring. She's like, Oh my God, is that why you didn't ask me? So she almost blew her shot. Wow. Yeah. Like what are the odds you run into the same person twice at Runyon? Like it was crazy. Runyon is, I don't understand. How is he, is he following her? Like how, how, how, how is he?
Starting point is 00:22:27 Happenstance. I go to Runyon all the time. You're not really next to anybody the whole time. You're, you're pretty, you either walk past them. You're not making yourself. Nobody wants to be hit on a fucking while they're hiking. It's like the last. Honestly, at Runyon.
Starting point is 00:22:41 Yeah. I don't think so. It doesn't seem like it. I feel like girls go to Runyon and they pop off. Like that is... To me, it's like the gym. It's like nobody wants to be bothered at the gym. Runyon's a different thing, especially if you have a dog.
Starting point is 00:22:55 It's more of a scene. It's a place to like meet people. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Okay. Yeah. I take that back. I mean, I've seen like one of my other friends met Oprah at Runyon.
Starting point is 00:23:06 No way. And she like commented on her dog and then they got a pic. It was a crazy interaction. And now they're married. Yeah, her and Oprah. Did she give her a car? No, God, she should have.
Starting point is 00:23:15 That'd be one hell of a look. She really should have. No, you guys should go to Runyon. Oprah's giving out cars at Runyon. Oh my God, that might be a good strategy though to get some good press for the pog. Kind of cool. But I do see her point, back to this before we move on.
Starting point is 00:23:28 I do see her point where like a no from you should be enough, but hey, you got the ring, use it to your advantage. You have to talk less, less fucks to give. Sorry, I'm engaged. Yeah. Like I get the principle of what you're doing. And if you really don't want to share your relationship status, you do you, but it is
Starting point is 00:23:47 a lot quicker. It is. And you get rid of them faster. I think engaged is like the best one. I think engaged is stronger than married and boyfriend and girlfriend. Really? Yeah, because engaged is fresh. It's new.
Starting point is 00:24:00 I'm excited. Leave me alone. I know. Because married, it's like, you've been married for how long? Maybe you're kind of sick of the relationship. Maybe I do have a chance. Interesting. That is so interesting.
Starting point is 00:24:10 And I can, I completely could see it. Yeah. My fiance, he's like, I don't want to get married. Like being able to say fiance just sounds so cool. Like he does want to get married, but just like he loves the label fiance versus, oh my wife. But I also feel like a little embarrassed saying it sometimes. Really?
Starting point is 00:24:27 It's like... Does it feel braggy? A little bit. Sometimes it comes, I feel the same. I'm like, I'm sorry. I'm not trying to show off. Yeah, it's almost like a, okay. I feel like every time I've used it, it's been like, not in an unnecessary way, but it's just like a detail that's like too much to where it's like, okay.
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Starting point is 00:25:56 Terms apply. Again, create an account and redeem code THT for $20 off. Download Game Time today. Last minute tickets tickets lowest price guaranteed This next one is coming from am I the asshole It's a doozy of a title Am I the asshole for being truthful with my friends when telling them I won't go on a weekend away Because I don't want to talk about marriage slash babies for three days
Starting point is 00:26:24 To me already, I don't want to talk about marriage slash babies for three days. To me already, I don't think I'm going. It's almost like you don't want to be like a third wheel. It really depends on the people. You know what I mean? I got to see how they are with their kids. I just want to, I want to feel the vibe. There's a whole vibe, right? Definitely.
Starting point is 00:26:38 Cause there's some nasty, nasty kids out there and there's times where I would not want to be on a trip with them. So it all depends. Hit a baby. Hit a baby. I'm not scared to hit a kid. I, 27, female, have a group of friends, eight of us, and we have been friends for over a decade, since school.
Starting point is 00:26:57 Now we don't live in the same place, but we meet up a couple times of year for a weekend in an Airbnb. This used to be a weekend of good food, drinks, hot tubs, etc. I am content with my life at the moment. I am single, dating, and I don't know if I would like children. But in the event I did, I know I wouldn't want one soon. Around five of my friends, five out of the eight, are either married or in very long-term relationships. 5 out of the 8 are either married or in very long-term relationships. Of these 5, 2 either have a baby or are pregnant. I will be seeing all of my friends this year for various weddings, friend, slash baby events.
Starting point is 00:27:35 I have been invited on this year's girls trip. I have said I can't come. I didn't originally provide a reason. When queried in person by my friend, who is pregnant, I told her the truth. I am not going because it's a massive financial expense for three days where we only talk about people's upcoming engagements, weddings, babies. I have a lot going on, but I feel a lot of my friends do not show an interest unless I talk about someone I'm dating.
Starting point is 00:28:02 I also, last time, listened to one of my friends talk about her breastfeeding plans with vengeance for over an hour. She is not pregnant or even trying. Truthfully, it's boring and it feels dismissive. It's also a really expensive way to feel bad about myself. I made it clear when telling my friends this that I am thrilled for them all living the lives they want, but maybe it's not the weekend for me at the moment. Meaning, it feels like the group has two distinct life stages. I'm in the minority and it focuses on one stage.
Starting point is 00:28:35 My friend has since told me she's really hurt, and I'm not excited for her or our other friends. I responded saying, I evidently was, from other actions, excited for them, but I just think this trip wasn't for me. I do have numerous other things going on, and to fit this in both my calendar and financially, it's a struggle. I just want to add for this friend specifically, I have gone on three weekends away for her wedding and I am flying to go to her baby shower all in the last two years. I have not asked her nor has she wanted to fly to see me for anything in the last two years. So my question is, am I the asshole for being truthful with the reason why I can't go?
Starting point is 00:29:17 No, no, absolutely not. No. No, especially now that like it's been kind of like a one-sided relationship. I mean, I think she's doing the best for herself. And if I was in her position, I probably wouldn't go either. Because I'm kind of like in her position right now. And if I knew that all my friends, that's all they're going to talk about. If I knew that, I probably wouldn't either.
Starting point is 00:29:44 Just for my own like... Mental health. Yeah. I probably wouldn't either just for my own, like mental health. Yeah. I'd be like, maybe next time. Yeah, I get it. I mean, trips like that obviously are a lot of money to like, you know, you use your time off or whatever to go do these trips. And I mean, I totally get her. You don't have to. I feel like people feel like they have to do things like that they don't really want to do. Yeah. Just to make other people happy.
Starting point is 00:30:08 And it's okay to say no to things. It's okay to do what you want. Yeah, don't go on the trip. Save the money. If they wanna come out and see you, come out and see you. And yeah. I've been learning to say no a lot lately. I would say in the past year,
Starting point is 00:30:22 even like a sliver of no, like 10% no, I'm just like, you know what? I'm going to pass on this. Unless I'm not feeling a hundred for it. Not about it. God, I feel so honored you're here today now. Wow. You almost canceled. No, no, no, no. If your ass was in like Culver city, I don't know. No, it's the location. We're close. We're neighbors. Yeah. No.
Starting point is 00:30:47 The location is everything. I would say yes to everything if it was in my neighborhood. In your backyard. Yeah. No, I get that. Especially LA, getting across town is hard. I initially read this and I was like, okay, well, you know, two out of the eight are pregnant or have a kid. There's still six other people that are kind of in your boats, no kids. But then like hearing how much effort our OP has put into traveling for weddings and baby showers. Like she traveled three weekends
Starting point is 00:31:19 and is now traveling for a baby shower for this one friend. That's insane. And I think it is pretty common in friend groups. And it's now starting to be talked about. If you're the single friend and all of your friends are kind of in other stages as you, you're getting them wedding gifts. You're flying, you're buying your bridesmaids dress.
Starting point is 00:31:35 You're getting them baby shower gifts. Where's the single friend getting accommodated for moving into their own apartment or getting a new job? Like you don't have those, those typically normal things to celebrate your single friend. And so it's like, it's always the single friends dishing out money for these people for like normal life events.
Starting point is 00:31:55 That's a really good way to think about it. I never thought of it about it like that from a singles perspective. It would be frustrating. It would be really frustrating. And I don't blame her. It's Celebrate the single people. Yeah, I just don't know what how do we celebrate them? Three years of that not having a boyfriend girlfriend like okay
Starting point is 00:32:15 Like you're like you're powerful. You are you are independent. Where's my independence party? Yeah Then let's throw you an independence party. I love that. July 4th. I was gonna say July 4th. July 4th, celebrate all the single people. Independence day for America and our single friends out there. Very good. I love that.
Starting point is 00:32:36 Let's make something for you. How do we start that? You heard it here, guys. You heard it here. Independence day. Let's start next month. Any of your single friends who have not been dating for more than a year, and their year's about to hit next
Starting point is 00:32:46 month, do a big ass celebration. It would mean so much to them. And then, then they'll start buying all those tickets and flights and all that bullshit to all your weddings and. Yeah. All that stuff. Then there's some give and take, but there hasn't been give and take.
Starting point is 00:33:01 And like hearing about one person talk about breastfeeding for an hour when they're not even pregnant or trying, oh, haven't you been in one of those conversations where you're with your friend and you're like, can we move on? We really gotta move on. It's all they know what to talk about. But it's hard when you're in those conversations
Starting point is 00:33:18 that it's just like, okay, this is really like not relatable. It's not going anywhere. We're talking in circles. And you don't wanna be rude, but at the same time, like, okay, we get it. Especially when there's alcohol involved. And like, you really just, you're just talking. How are you talking about breastfeeding and titty milk while you're drunk? I feel like that's the last thing you're thinking about, like feeding your baby when you're drunk. Yeah. It's probably, it's probably not a good mix. A lot of people pump and dump, but apparently you don't necessarily have
Starting point is 00:33:48 to anymore. So says. Pump and dump is when it's from nip to mouth or is it from nip to bottle? You pump it into a bottle. Yeah. Or like whatever the storage units that the breast pumps have like attached. But a lot of people after they have a lot of alcohol in their system, they have to pump to like cleanse it so the baby doesn't get drunk.
Starting point is 00:34:08 So they say, I'm not, I don't know. I don't have kids, haven't gotten there. This is why they talk about it for an hour. Cause there's so much you can do. I had no idea. I mean, it is interesting, but I get the frustration. I was a little scared where the comments were going to go. Though. What do you, what do you think the vote is
Starting point is 00:34:23 on this one? So I think it's gonna be... I think they're gonna take the girl's side. Majority in favor of this girl needs to do what she feels right. Especially when it's so exhausting, when you feel like you go above and beyond for everybody else and it's not reciprocated. You get tired of it and you're like, I feel like all I do is give and give and give. And when you don't see it in return, you're like kind of at your breaking point.
Starting point is 00:34:46 Yeah. Can I say something? It's also really easy to see it from their point of view too. I've noticed that we're always agreeing with the person writing it, but who knows what's going on on the other end of the stories. Yeah. I know that's the whole point of it. No, no, no. And I could see like, because when I first read it, I didn't get all the way through
Starting point is 00:35:08 because I was just like, initial scan to make sure it's at least decent enough for an episode. And I so I stopped reading after I was like, okay, it's good enough. And initially I was like, well, that's kind of, it's kind of selfish.
Starting point is 00:35:19 Cause like, in a sense, like, yeah, you're just not at the same stage as them, but like you're also almost in a sense, like not yeah, you're just not at the same stage as them, but like, you're also almost in a sense, like not being as good of a friend by like, just not going because you don't want to hear them talking about their kid. Yeah. Like, they do have kids now.
Starting point is 00:35:35 How can you all come together to make it a balance? You're not even giving them the opportunity to like, address it and be like, hey, I don't have kids. I feel like the past trips have been very engagement, wedding, kid centered. Can we make this more fun? Can we like kind of have a rule where we keep that tone down? Yeah. But you also don't want to be the person that is like, guys are not going to talk about kids. They're not going to.
Starting point is 00:35:56 It's like, if you feel like you're going to be annoyed and it's best for you to sit it out, then sit it out. Yeah. You know, it does start fights. Like as soon as you have a thought like that where, hey, can we do this trip like a little fun? Oh, the last one wasn't fun. True. Oh, I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:36:11 Last one wasn't up to your standard. We all had fun. Sounds like you're the only odd man. Maybe you're the problem. I'm sorry that this is part of my life right now and I have kids and I'm excited to talk about it. You're so right. Yeah, you can't.
Starting point is 00:36:22 It's so exhausting what, like we will get in fights over with people. You just have to surround yourself, surround people that's like similar to you, like your interests. And I mean, that's the only way. And you have to do it without like starting any fights.
Starting point is 00:36:33 I know. You just have to. God, it's so hard. I feel like that's why so many friendships end. Like, especially in that, like that time of the life when you were getting married and shit is because you're not, you can't like relate anymore to, but your friends are. Yeah. Like Zane doesn't want to be friends with me anymore because we're engaged now
Starting point is 00:36:49 and we're going to be getting married and moving to Tennessee. And we're in Tennessee, Nashville. So we're going to be like just outside of Chattanooga, whatever the F that place is. He's going to be in the middle of nowhere. That is a little far Nashville. I love Nashville. I can live there. But Chattanooga, I don't know. It's like two hours or so from Nashville. Wifi doesn't exist over there. That's far.
Starting point is 00:37:10 I don't know how he's going to post his Instagram stories out there and his content. They got coffee shots with wifi. And internet cafe. I know, but you're not going to need it if you have kids. You don't need wifi when you have kids, right? I don't know. It depends on if you want an iPad baby or not. Just start over. Oh, I love iPad babies.
Starting point is 00:37:27 Get them to show up. Put them in a corner. Look at that screen. Creating a monster. No, I can't stand that stuff. You know who are iPad babies? All of us. I didn't have an iPad.
Starting point is 00:37:39 No, right now. Oh yeah. We're iPad babies. Yeah, I do feel a little stunted. That we're iPad kids? Yeah, iPad, 100%. The time I spent on my phone I checked. It's like 36 hours on my phone. A screen time? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:53 In one day. In one week. Oh my God. In one week, 36 hours. That's pretty intense. That's borderline full-time job. That is, yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:04 A 40 hour work week. Wow. It's crazy. But we work from our phones. We do. A little bit of an excuse. We're not working when we go through TikTok. We're not working. We're pulling inspiration. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:13 Yeah, yeah. I'm doing research. So top comment on this one. Not the asshole. Because the real issue here is different from how it seems. On the surface, this seems like it's just about engagements, weddings, and babies. You go out of your way to be constantly supportive of them.
Starting point is 00:38:29 However, they don't reciprocate that for you. They can't relate to anything or want to relate to anything outside of their lives. It would sort of be like if you had just won an award, but all they talked about was the pie they just ate that morning. OP responds, maybe I spent 13 weekends last year
Starting point is 00:38:46 traveling, including transport and hotels for this group's big events. And I am happy for them. That said, it's a massive financial outlay. I am expected to attend and they are not interested in mine. They were all invited to my birthday recently and said they were too busy from work slash had plans with partners too busy being married To come to the city for a night even though accommodation was free That's really that's crazy. We needed that context in the original pose like easy off the bat. No conversation needed not the asshole 13 weekends. There's only 52 weeks a year. That's what? math wise there are no
Starting point is 00:39:26 math 25% yeah I I can't that's a lot I want the bride and groom to start having to pay for everybody should if they want them to go on to this fucking expensive ass trip dude I think that's got that she's gotten crazy also weddings are absurdly expensive that that's why I'm doing it on my farm. I'm just like saving on the venue at least and we're just having food trucks. But I think that shit has gotten crazy. Like you should not have to go to four events
Starting point is 00:39:55 for one couple getting married. An engagement party, a bridal shower, a bachelor or bachelorette trip, and then the actual wedding. Don't forget the reception or not the reception, the rehearsal dinner before. And all that risk for 60% divorce rate. Come on now.
Starting point is 00:40:14 All that for a 60% divorce rate. That's like, if you look at it from a business perspective, it's not very smart. The risk is way too high to spend, to be spending all this money for one night. Put that money in some stocks. Exactly. Get a house. Yeah. Robin Hood. That's it. These weddings are houses. Like full houses. Some people really go crazy. There was one that went super viral on TikTok for a while. And it turns out she spent like 4 million for her wedding
Starting point is 00:40:42 in Paris. And then her fiance is like getting a felony in Texas and he wasn't even supposed to go to Paris. No way. Oh yeah. And then she took down all the wedding videos. It was crazy TikTok drama. Oof. And they didn't have the money to bail him out because they just spent $4 million on that
Starting point is 00:40:57 wedding. That's absurd. Yeah. So our OP does provide us a little bit of an update here. Okay. Thank you all for the responses and comments. Just a few things to note in response to some of the general themes of response. I do show an interest in their weddings, engagements, babies and baby plans. I am excited for them. I text about it. I ask for updates. I go to and help plan events for
Starting point is 00:41:19 these things. My issue is, three days of talking this, like it's the only topic of substance, is not fun, especially when I don't feel an interest is reciprocated to me on my life. We don't need anything else and there's still three more bullet points. It's easy to show interest back when they're showing interest in anything that you have going on in your, you know, in your single life. You know what I mean? If, if they show interest and anything they say is just easier to like, you'll probably want to stop, stop talking interest and anything they say, it's just easier to like, you'll probably wanna stop talking about yourself because they're doing such a good job
Starting point is 00:41:49 in showing interest in what you have to say where you just like, you know what, I'm gonna focus on them the rest of the time. So it's definitely no reciprocation for sure. No, and that's just, oh, it feels so terrible. And point number two, this is where it gets juicy. I have spoken to one of my other friends invited on the trip,
Starting point is 00:42:04 who is also not at the baby stage of life. She is also not going on the trip and she said she is not attending for the same reason. Feels good when you have it back up. Three, the friend I expressed this to has apologized for her initial reaction and is still trying to convince me to come. I am not going to go, but I'm hoping she at least considers what I've shared. Four, I do have other friends in the city I live in and they are a joy to be in the company of. Maybe this is because we became friends as adults and have more similar lifestyles. Who knows? Finally, some comments about me being jealous, hating myself, hating my life, etc. To confirm dear strangers on the internet,
Starting point is 00:42:44 I am content. Thank you for the concern though. Whoever said that was fucking nuts, first of all. She's 27. She's being single at 27 is like, that's normal. Normal, yeah. Like, people are here. Yeah, I think the whole approach to it and reasoning,
Starting point is 00:43:02 I mean, if you're going into it, just being like, I just don't wanna hear what you guys have to talk about because that's what stage you're at at life. And like, if that was the only reason, I'd be like, ah, well, I mean, they're your friends. Just, just hear them out. Just listen and just be excited, whatever. But everything else on top of that, I think should be what's driving this argument. Yeah. She just wants to have a good time. And if you already know you're not going to have a good time. And if you already know you're not gonna have a good time, you're essentially spending a lot of money to have a bad time.
Starting point is 00:43:30 Yeah. Where does that math add up? It doesn't. Save that money. Save that money. So you pay for my flight then? Yeah, you guys, you married people, you got dual incomes, let's do a fund.
Starting point is 00:43:42 How bad do you want me to be there? Yeah, pay for my ticket. I'm flying four times in the past two years for you and your wedding and babies. Make this make sense. Where's my present? For me, Ashley. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:53 I wonder if any of these girls ever see these Reddit posts. I was just thinking about that a couple minutes ago. Yes. They do? Yeah, I've done a whole theme where we have like two sides and like the husband writes in bitching about the wife and then the wife finds it and shares her side and it's the Most fun. It's so good. Do you think they're like still fine to this day after or like it's more kind of?
Starting point is 00:44:11 Some laugh about it depending on the problem. Some are like my husband's an idiot. Haha. But some I think are like found it. We're done. Or do you see them like comment under OP and be like, Hi, it's your wife, Sarah here. Yeah, we get that too. Dang. Reddit is... I would be below, be like, what are you looking up, babe?
Starting point is 00:44:32 You got it. You just got to be as broad as possible so people cannot pick it apart. Yep. Fake names, details changed. Always. Yeah. Instead of three friends, say six friends, you know, just, you gotta change it up. Interesting Ashley, this story sounds a lot like what we were just talking about.
Starting point is 00:44:48 Well, this next one, it would be pretty unfortunate if the other party found it. Uh oh. Which one, the one you're about to say right now? The one I'm about to read. I'm so excited, let's hear it. Another one of this week's partners is Hero Brad. Hi, my name is Morgan and I have a problem with bread.
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Starting point is 00:46:12 Hero Bread is offering 10% off your order. Go to hero.co and use code THT at checkout. That's THT at h-e-r-o dot c-o. So this one is coming from r slash Today I Fucked Up. It's titled, Today I Fucked Up, Telling My Boyfriend That I Used to Almost Vomit While Giving Him a Blowjob Because of His Odor. That's pretty bad. And he should not, he should not be upset about that. That is hygiene, my dude.
Starting point is 00:46:47 I feel so bad. Is that you? I'm a stinky boy. Yeah. There's ways to go about things, man. For her or for him? For both parties. I mean, he could fucking, he could at least clean down there.
Starting point is 00:47:01 Shouldn't be stinking like that. It's as simple as being like, hey baby, by the way. Your dick stinks. Could you shower real quick? I'm fine with doing this, but you see you're a little bit sweaty and stinky right now? She probably did. We're going to tell you right now.
Starting point is 00:47:17 Oh, yeah. She's going to tell us. OK. I feel so bad, but it's also sort of on him. For most of our relationship, my boyfriend has had a strong odor in his crotch area. The type most women would refuse to go down on. Fish, smegma, that type of smell. Whoa. I still go down on him because I do love giving blowjobs. And I know it's not because he flat out
Starting point is 00:47:41 doesn't wash himself. I know he takes showers regularly. I will have him take a shower before I go down on him, like directly before, and it will still smell foul down there. Interesting. I have no idea how that's possible, but I attune his smell to be because he is very overweight. I have dropped so many hints, y'all,
Starting point is 00:48:02 and I told him flat out to take a shower before sex because I don't like the smell I've even washed his crotch for him when we take pre-sex showers all of this I have said gently Milk are you milking him? No like a towel on his end and just fucking Like a hacksaw. What is it? The hacksaw. But it has been a bit better lately. This morning in bed, I sniffed his hand and jokingly gagged
Starting point is 00:48:36 and asked if he had been scratching his nuts, which I can always smell on his hands. Yuck, I know. And he laughed and said, yes. After a few seconds, I said, we've been dating for a while and you know, I like to be honest with you and proceeded to tell him that I used to hold my breath during blow jobs because when I breathe, I'd be close to throwing up. He thinks he's making her choking gag.
Starting point is 00:49:00 Oh my God. Okay. I mean, this doesn't seem like a shock. It sounds like she's multiple times I've told them that you stink. So that's not like that big of a secret that she was just holding her breath. Yeah, no shit. You think she was breathing it in just as.
Starting point is 00:49:19 I'm so, I'm a little nauseous over here. Okay. So Matt, all right. Matt was telling me how there's a thing there's a, there's a thing, there's a disease that you can have where you smell like fish and you, it doesn't matter how hard you scrub with soap. It does not. Forget the name of it. I don't think that's there specifically. I think that's your whole body. But what if, what if that's the start? Starts in his taint. I know what you're thinking. Stop giving him head. What the fuck? I know, I know. It was just so hard for me to take the final step in letting him know how bad it was by
Starting point is 00:49:48 refusing to go down on him. If I simply said I didn't want to give him head, he'd understand and never pressure me, but I still didn't want to hurt his feelings. Don't roast me too hard, please. Anyways, he knew he smelled bad, but thought the showers helped completely. He has left the room due to hurt feelings now. I feel like an asshole lol I mean This sounds like a medical issue. It does
Starting point is 00:50:12 I think I think the best route for both of them to go is for her is just because it's like it You know, they're a couple and it could be nice But they could both go to the doctor and just try to figure out what it is It's gotta be some sort of like pH balance wipe for guys or something. And that's what I'm wondering if it's a pH issue or like, honestly, maybe he has an untreated STI because like smegma, like for those that don't really know what smegma is, it is a thick, cheesy looking secretion around your genitals that collects when you don't wash them regularly. It can be white or yellow.
Starting point is 00:50:48 It's a combination of oils from your sebaceous glands, dead skin and cells. So if he's got smegma. I think it's a hygiene problem. I can smell it. Stop. I can smell it. It's like a little bit of both.
Starting point is 00:51:02 Like it feels like it's both because she's even saying he's doing showers right before sex, daily showers, and he still smells. I know it's an imbalance of something. I'm sure it's like a- It could be diet too. Or diet, yeah. And like Grannad, she does mention-
Starting point is 00:51:17 Oily, fatty, nasty foods. It could just be a lot of fried, yeah, oily stuff because like I had dairy last night and like I can feel it. Like I just like I don't do dairy ever and I just feel terrible today. There are certain foods where like I will like my hands will smell after showering, washing my hands. It's just certain foods. Certain foods you just have to avoid because it just your body doesn't, it just makes a
Starting point is 00:51:42 seep out of your skin and you just can't let it eat it. Well it's like the meat sweats too. If you have like a lot of meat and like you... I would love to hear like what he's eating every day. Like just like, is he eating a lot of meat, a lot of garlic? Is he eating a lot of fish? Like, who knows? What if he's like his favorite thing to eat is just fucking fish,
Starting point is 00:52:01 breakfast, lunch and dinner. Who knows? I'm curious. The only edit or update we have on the original post is OP does share that he is circumcised, which does help with the smegma because I know for some people- Get trapped in there.
Starting point is 00:52:15 Well, people that are not circumcised, if they're not taught to pull back the skin and wash, when it does pull back, it looks like cottage cheese. I'm so sorry everyone. We have a couple friends with that type of penis. Hopefully they know how to wash properly. I don't know. You'd be surprised. I'm not seeing a lot of comments on this one. I think like, unfortunately, this might not be the best relationship for OP.
Starting point is 00:52:47 Well, if she keeps smelling fucking smegma every time she goes down. It's tough. It's like, there's clearly something going on. Especially these washing. Yeah, it's something. It seems like it's getting to the point for her where she's like not even attracted to him anymore
Starting point is 00:53:04 because of this issue. And it's getting to the point for her where she's like not even attracted to him anymore because of this issue and it's just pushing them apart and Yeah, you know, I mean yeah at that point you make the decision I wonder if she says he smells up here Or is it just down there? It's got to be washed was thing wafting up there. Yeah, it would have to well the other problem is Do you know like there's this stat where on average you touch like 10 dicks a day from people not washing their hands? No way. Yeah, so if you like touch a doorknob of like a house or a bathroom, like you probably just touched a dick from someone not washing their hands.
Starting point is 00:53:39 And so like she literally, he was smelling his hands or she got a whiff of his hands and it smelled like his crotch. It's like you're rubbing your nuts and then you don't wash your hands. Like dudes going to the bathroom and having that mindset of like, well, I just touched myself. Disgusting. Wash your hands, you dirty, dirty piece.
Starting point is 00:53:58 Dirty pig. But you know what I like to do? I'd like to wash my hands before I touch my peach. You should do both. I feel like it should be a sandwich for guys, to be honest. Because what if you just had hot sauce and then you're gonna touch your dick and then you get hot sauce on it?
Starting point is 00:54:13 I've accidentally maced myself twice or three times. Mace twice, Tabasco sauce in the eyes once. Not good. So your urethra? Would not like that at all. You have like a mace on your keychain that like kind of like went off a little bit. I was testing it one time, maybe twice,
Starting point is 00:54:29 and then the wind took it. Yeah, we did that with bear spray. We were going on a hiking trip and I wanted to see if it worked. It catches the wind quick. Quick? You do and think so, and it shoots so far. Yeah. Oh, man. It's intense. It's really intense.
Starting point is 00:54:46 Oh, and once the wind takes it, it'll just like go everywhere. You don't know. It shoots out in like a straight line. But just those particles just being around it, it'll like choke you up and you'll just start gagging. It's really bad. Oh, it's so just terrible. No one should go through that unless they deserve it. We should do that. We should do that for our podcast.
Starting point is 00:55:07 Nobody should ever go through it unless they deserve it. Muggers, bad people. Yeah, I agree. I'm not seeing comments about diet really. There is kind of one that mentions the smell is off and on. It depends on what he's eaten and what he's done at work. It's not a deal breaker because it's not as if he's neglectful towards his hygiene.
Starting point is 00:55:29 So, I don't know. Doctor. Yeah. Doctor, doctor. I would say this is definitely a medical thing that needs to be evaluated. And you could try like flavored lube or like things that are very like scented. Like I love coconut oil. And I feel like it's like a two birds one stone.
Starting point is 00:55:48 You use coconut oil, makes the hand movements feel gliding. And you also get to whiten your teeth at the same time because coconut oil whitens your teeth. It's edible. Oh nice. Oh wow, I didn't know that. Or maybe a little bit of summer's Eve vaginal spray.
Starting point is 00:56:02 I mean, I'm sure it'll work for dudes too. I don't know about, I don't know. I don't know I don't know isn't that just a perfume? I feel like I'm really nervous to try that type of stuff because I feel like that really messes with your pH. Coconut oil unrefined virgin. Don't listen to me guys. It's the best lube you will ever use ever. Ever. Ever. Huh. Yeah, you guys, you go home. You've tested it out. You can cook with that stuff too, right? Yeah. It's so versatile.
Starting point is 00:56:31 You can do oil pulling with it. You take a spoonful in the morning, squish it. I've seen that. It doesn't seem right. It does whiten the fuck out of your teeth. Really? But doesn't it destroy like your gums? It's actually supposed to be really good for your gums. How do you do it again? You take a spoonful of it, like a small little spoonful and put it in your mouth, swish it around for what you can tolerate.
Starting point is 00:56:51 They say about 20 minutes. With water or no? No. Once you put it in your mouth, it heats up and just becomes a liquid. Got it. It's really good. Wait, you're swishing around for 20 minutes? So do it first thing in the morning, like when you wake up as you're like scrolling
Starting point is 00:57:04 on your phone before you really get out of bed or get moving and it flies by. How long are you doing it or not how long, how many times a week are you doing that? A lot of people do daily. 20 minutes daily? Yeah. That's insane. But you're doing other stuff like do it as you're like, you know, bopping around your house making breakfast.
Starting point is 00:57:23 Yeah, but you can't open your mouth. The coconut oil was in your mouth. Can you not breathe out of your nose? No, I have DVDs of them. What about a nose job? I could. How do you like, I'm a nose breather through and through. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:38 So when I get a cold and not being able to breathe out of my nose. Yeah, that's what it's like all this time. I have a mental breakdown. Like I can't, I can't stand it. It's horrible. You feel like you're like, it's like being claustrophobic in your own face. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:52 I've never had anyone describe it like that. And that is exactly what it feels like. Yeah, it's very uncomfortable. Have you tried like holding your nostrils open to stimulate what it would feel like? Yeah, I'll do this. Does it really work? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:03 Oh my God. Or no, you do this too. This is really good. This is really good. This right here, look. Pressing on your sinuses. It's crazy that people can breathe like that all the time. This is so. Do you have a deviated symptom too?
Starting point is 00:58:17 I don't know if I do, but I can't breathe out of my nose. It's very difficult. You probably do. And you guys have great noses. It's not like you need it aesthetically, like a nose job. And like no one does. Noses, everyone's nose is beautiful. But you should look into just getting the internal stuff.
Starting point is 00:58:31 Like imagine what it would feel like to breathe every day. Yeah. Imagine you get a DVS set up, but then also you get a better nose too. Your nose is really good. Thank you. Yeah. I wouldn't touch the nose. I won't. Definitely won't. Just go inside. Yeah, I wouldn't touch the nose. I won't.
Starting point is 00:58:45 Definitely won't. Just go inside. Yeah. Back to this one. Before we move along, top comment, he needs to go see a doctor. It's not normal to have that kind of smell after washing. This honestly sounds like a yeast infection. Yes, men can have those too.
Starting point is 00:59:00 Actually one of the risk factors for yeast infections is being overweight. Wow. Mm-hmm. And diabetes can be a factor as well, someone shares. So is that like, is that coming from his, his pee-sh or more of his taint? Like that, that, like where would you think, because the yeast infection... I would assume urethra? It's internal.
Starting point is 00:59:22 No, no, for the, for the guys. I'm going to Google, where do men get yeast infections? I would assume urethra. But if he has, if he has Segment on his balls. It can cause, yes, men can get yeast infections too, which can lead to a condition known as Blanditis, inflammation of the head of the penis. Yeast infections are, men are common because the fungus that causes yeast infections,
Starting point is 00:59:46 Candida, is normally present on skin, especially moist skin. Ooh, baby girl, you sucking on that tit? Ew, that's actually horrifying when you think about it. Well now I'm like, does it taste like sourdough bread? Maybe. Like a yeast starter? So it's not yeast she's probably,
Starting point is 01:00:02 it's not salmon she's smelling, it's yeast. Yeah. Oh, she cooking up that dough down there. We got to move along before we make everybody sick. I'm so sorry. You guys. I'm getting hungry now. Yeah. I want a pizza. Oh, pizza Friday. It's Tuesday. Oh wow. The crazy thing is I got excited and accepted it. Taco Tuesday. It is Taco Tuesday. There you go. And a margarita, how good does that sound?
Starting point is 01:00:28 And I had a burrito earlier today, so I celebrated it already. There you go. Okay, moving along. Another one of this week's partners is Heineken Zero Zero. Bum, bum, bum, bum. Heineken Zero Zero is an alcohol-free option to the original Heineken you already love.
Starting point is 01:00:47 It has 100% taste, but 0.0% alcohol, which means it's perfect for all those times you want a beer, but don't actually want a beer. I know for me, I did Dry January this year, and it was the best I ever felt. But I still go out, and I wanna hang out with my friends and sip on something good. Makes me feel like I'm fittin' in. I don't have FOMO and
Starting point is 01:01:07 Heineken Zero Zero does that trick. So if you're giving up alcohol for a dry July, Heineken Zero Zero. You might have happy hour with your colleagues after work. Heineken Zero Zero. So if you're ready to try it for yourself, Heineken Zero Zero. 100% taste, 0.0% alcohol, only 69 calories. Now you can. Click the link in our show notes to buy now. Must be 21 plus to purchase. Please enjoy Heineken responsibly.
Starting point is 01:01:36 Okay, this next one. 12 days old. Titled, my boyfriend doesn't want me drinking during the week. And I mean a single glass of wine. So he says. Get rid of them. Me, 30 female, him, 27 male.
Starting point is 01:01:52 I'm going to call him Dave for this post. I'm not even sure where to start. It was such a great Thursday. I got home from work and Dave and I went shopping and got a few things for dinner. Shrimp, salmon, and asparagus. One of my favorite meals. What goes well with this meal?
Starting point is 01:02:08 A glass of wine. When I asked my boyfriend if he could go get a small bottle of my favorite wine so we can have a glass with dinner, he said no. I was sort of thrown off by his response. And I asked him why. He said, quote, you shouldn't be drinking on a weekday.
Starting point is 01:02:24 I said, pardon me? Then. He said, quote, you shouldn't be drinking on a weekday. I said, pardon me? Then his response was, quote, your family are alcoholics and I don't trust your family genes. I was livid. Okay, built up. Yeah, no way. My dad used to be a heavy drinker, but he no longer is.
Starting point is 01:02:40 And even so, how does that have to do with how I am with it? I've never abused alcohol before. I haven't even had a glass of wine with dinner for as long as I can remember. I've been living on my own since I was 15. He's been living with me for about three years. I said to him that I'm a grown ass woman, and if I want a glass of wine with my dinner, I'm more than welcome to do so. And it's not his choice to have a say. And honestly, if he doesn't like that, then I feel like maybe he should move back to his dad's. Who gets mad for someone wanting a glass of wine with dinner?
Starting point is 01:03:12 He ended up getting very angry and stormed off to his dad's house. In the end of all of this, the perfectly cooked dinner was left out and no one had dinner tonight and he will be staying at his dad's now. Am I the asshole? Absolutely not. A glass of wine is there's nothing wrong with a glass of wine. She's not saying a bottle. It's crazy.
Starting point is 01:03:33 I just can't wait to get the next things because I need to know more. I need to know like if it's like that was out of the blue. Like I need details baby. You're addicted now. I would get if he had like if he had parents or had a brother that like died from alcoholism. Well, it seems like alcoholism runs in the family. No, not his family, her family. So it's like none of his business to be like telling her what to do.
Starting point is 01:04:00 If he like felt kind of uneasy about that and he felt uncomfortable, then maybe I would sympathize with him, but it sounds like he's just... Yeah, and there had to have been multiple conversations before this. Out of the blue like that is pretty random. It's so weird. I feel like I'm good with giving advice and putting in my two cents because I'm always like, I don't know, I feel like I don't let things like work me up
Starting point is 01:04:28 and I always, if it's meant to be, it's meant to be type thing. And I'd be like, all right, well, obviously like it's not working out. And if it bothers you and if it bothers them, then goodbye. And I feel like that's always my response because it's never really like affected me.
Starting point is 01:04:46 Like especially like in friendships, like I've had friendships that I don't have anymore. It's like something happened. We didn't see eye to eye. And it's like my life is better without somebody. Because to me, it's not even about the alcohol. It's just about like, what else are you going to do? The controlling aspect of it. The controlling aspect of it is just like, that's where the problem is. And if it's, it sounds like, would that just, would that hard no and just no explanation,
Starting point is 01:05:11 just like you shouldn't be drinking that. It's like, oh, okay. So what else can I not do under your roof? Like that's the thing. It's, it's one thing to say that and think that, you know, I think it's bad if you do this, uh, coming from a concerned, like loving standpoint, and be like, hey, you know, we drink a lot on the weekends. You know, what if we tried not drinking during the weekdays?
Starting point is 01:05:34 It's all about the approach. It's about, you know, as opposed to just kind of like- Just springing it out of the blue. Yeah. Yeah, and there is a comment from OP clarifying, like, has he ever brought this up before? Like, someone asked that. And OP goes, no, he never did. Maybe because he knew how my dad was with it and my dad's father,
Starting point is 01:05:55 maybe he's just scared it will be passed down to me one day. I don't know. And someone else goes, if he ever saw evidence of that, then he'd be free to initiate a conversation about it. Deciding you can or can't drink is not appropriate at all, especially in the absence of any troubling behavior. So it does seem like it was just a random, no, you're not having wine during the week,
Starting point is 01:06:15 which like, there's also some studies that say a glass of red wine a night or with a meal or whatever, like is good for you. Like there's some, there's a mix of research. I'm on her side fucking. But it's so weird. It's like, I don't like when people start trying to like police your behavior if it's not bad.
Starting point is 01:06:37 Yeah. It's like, well, what is this? Like you said, what is this going to lead into? Right, like I used to chain smoke cigarettes. Okay. I used to smoke about like two packs a day. Did you quit? I did. You're done done?
Starting point is 01:06:50 Yeah. That's amazing. When I met Mariah, I was smoking and I always knew she didn't like it. And I feel like it was probably like a year into our relationship, she was like, I'm telling you this because I love you and I care about you.
Starting point is 01:07:04 And it's a health concern. I'm not telling you to do this, but I think it would be best to try to kick this habit. Knowing that she cared about me so much and being like, hey, I would never want anything to happen to you because of something like so stupid. Yeah, that you can just like, you can theoretically just stop. And like, me quitting meant more in that way than not. Does that make sense? Yeah. Yeah, it's like it's, you have this person you now love.
Starting point is 01:07:38 I had like a reason to. There's a little bit more motivation there. Right. And you also get the perk of like, it's going to improve your health. Yeah. It's realistically, it's better for you long term. I knew I stunk. I always smell like cigarettes. Your fingertips. And like somebody who's a non-smoker like you smell it. Like if anybody has a say like it's like
Starting point is 01:07:58 yeah it's so pungent like I was like damn like I felt bad like I felt selfish for just kind of like I don't know. Yeah, I'm so proud you were you were able to quit That's huge to go from two packs a day Like yeah, that is a lot of dedication and like yeah, you had the external motivation But you still had to have that intrinsic because otherwise it would never have worked I switched to like the the e-cigarettes for a little bit Yeah Otherwise, it would never have worked. I switched to like the e-cigarettes for a little bit. Yeah. And like that helped me get off. And then I ended up being able to get off of that and just...
Starting point is 01:08:30 That's, yeah, that's amazing. I love the way your fiance approached it too. Like it wasn't from this angle of control. Like you need to stop smoking. It's like, it's just genuine concern. Like, hey, I, you know, just looking out, I'd really, you know, maybe you could consider cutting back or quitting. Like that hey, I, you know, just looking out, I'd really, you know, maybe you could consider cutting back or
Starting point is 01:08:46 quitting. Like that is a different angle. Like if this guy were to see her having a bottle of wine every night or maybe two glasses every night, every day of the week, like, Hey hon, like, I'm just a little concerned. Maybe we skip the wine with dinner tonight. But she even says, I can't even remember the last time I had a glass
Starting point is 01:09:03 of wine with dinner. I don't have a problem. And then he's so mad that he like, can't even enjoy the dinner then. He's just like- Seems like something must have happened right before dinner that he was already like, heated about and kind of like snapped. There's no mentions of it in OP's comments that I see.
Starting point is 01:09:21 Not a lot beyond the post. So I don't know. But the top comment on this one, he's so pissed off that you wouldn't let him control you that he chucked a fucking tasty meal and went running back to his dad's house. I'm not trying to be one of those commenters who goes straight to either break up or divorce. So my advice is in that order for you to continue this relationship. He needs to give you a really good apology. He needs to outline what he did that was wrong and why he also needs to prove that he understands that it's not his
Starting point is 01:09:54 place to decide for you whether you have a glass of wine with dinner or not. If he can't treat you as an equal partner who has agency over her own body and life choices, he's not the one. Yeah, he just sounds childish. Like just like the whole, like throwing away dinner and just going to daddy's house just seems like he is- A little immature. He has a little bit more room to grow.
Starting point is 01:10:17 Yeah, and I also- Coming from me, that's a lot. I also think too like, Mariah pretty much never drank our entire relationship. Yeah. Like she had like a few drinks and like, would, you know, whatever. Maybe socially or randomly.
Starting point is 01:10:30 Yeah, super rarely. And like, I was a heavy drinker. And I knew, like, I'm sure she wasn't like, thrilled about that, but was just like. It's his choice. It's his choice. You know? She never like made me like feel bad
Starting point is 01:10:47 about doing it. Yeah, no, like it sounded like it was just genuine concern which is like the total opposite of this. And I think like control, like this might be one of those early red flags that starts popping up. Like we've had a lot of stories on my dad's podcast lately where these listeners will write in and like ask for advice based on their situation.
Starting point is 01:11:10 And the abuse they described starts really small. He wouldn't let me listen to the type of music I liked. And then it escalates to, if I make any noises when I'm falling asleep in bed, he gets pissed off. And it's like, what the fuck? Who can control if they start snoring as they're falling asleep or? Yeah. What?
Starting point is 01:11:32 Two people actually do that. Oh yeah. Yeah. I thought that was on the cartoon. No, my fiance is a sleep talker and then like he'll make these random little noises. And I'm like, what? He's like, oh, the goats, goats got out you have you have the app where it records every time someone says something I want to get it my friend
Starting point is 01:11:51 my friend Karina she has it and she shows it all the time she posted all the time she says in the little night and it's insane I'm a little scared I would catch my toots oh your toots oh am I Oh, am I, am I, yep, might catch that. Yeah, I haven't farted in front of him yet, so. Oh, wow. Well, make sure. Engaged in there. Well, you make sure you have the app on your phone,
Starting point is 01:12:13 not his phone. Okay, I can control. So you have it recorded, you hear a toot, you delete it. That's an idea, okay. Because it separates all the audios. So if like you toot in the middle of the night, it puts its own line.
Starting point is 01:12:23 Okay, I could give it this. Yeah. This would be good. Yeah, but you'll hear everything. Oh my God, I would love to hear what he says because he's such a sleep talker. Yeah. I sleep talk too. It's terrible. It's so good.
Starting point is 01:12:35 Okay, a couple more for us. Another one of this week's partners is ZocDoc. You guys know I've been using ZocDoc since 2015, long before this podcast ever existed. Almost 10 years! And ever since I started using ZocDoc, I have not had to compromise on the quality of care I'm getting. From my gynecologist to my general practitioner, every single provider I've found on ZocDoc has been amazing.
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Starting point is 01:13:37 a try, go to zocdoc.com slash tht and download the ZocDoc app for free! Then find and book a top rated doctor today. That's Z-O-C-D-O-C dot com slash T-H-T. ZocDoc dot com slash T-H-T. This is seven days old, coming from tuhot takes subreddit titled, Dating an Escort. Awesome. I, 61 male, have been seeing this escort, 44 female, for many years. She's told me a few times in the past that she loves me.
Starting point is 01:14:11 She's had a traumatic past being abandoned by her mom, having a kid when she was 15, and has been in abusive relationships. However, it appeared that she found her own as an escort and made a living from several repeat clients. She seems happy externally. However, she's told me a few times that her work is eating her up. However, she can't quit as she can't figure out another career that pays her bills.
Starting point is 01:14:36 I've developed feelings for her, but unsure if one can have a real relationship with an escort. Anyone have experience? Watch the movie Pretty Woman. Literally, it's giving Richard Gere. I've actually never seen that, I've never seen that movie. That is a crime.
Starting point is 01:14:49 So good. I know, I know. Julia Roberts, Richard Gere. She was an escort in that movie? Yeah. Oh wow. Oh my God, it's such a good movie. And then they fell in love. Aw, I'm gonna watch it, I'm gonna watch it. It's so good.
Starting point is 01:15:03 It's like a cute rom-com. Yeah. Okay. And it's filmed here. It's so good. It's like a cute rom-com. Yeah. Okay. It's a good wine night. Like you and Todd with a bottle of wine and like ordering some food in. Todd, that's the only person I can watch it with, just Todd.
Starting point is 01:15:14 There you go. But yeah, all right, sounds good. You got it. I feel like he's just trying to live life, have a good time. Love is love. I'm like team love. I'm just like, you try it, give it is love. I'm like team love.
Starting point is 01:15:25 I'm just like, you try it, give it a shot. I think try it out. Obviously don't make any harsh decisions on both ends. Like don't have her quit her job. Don't like, don't move her in. Okay, I have one very, very important question. He says he's been seeing her. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:15:40 Is that him? For many years. Seeing her, seeing her or paying her to see him? I think paying. Paying. Client. Yeah. I think it's only been a client service provider relationship. I mean... She says she loves him though.
Starting point is 01:15:57 Girl, she loved the money. But what if she really like, what if it was like... He's her top client. Maybe. You're my favorite customer. I did read another story recently that was from this person sharing, I used to get massages regularly and the masseuse would let you pay for upgrades, which was a happy ending. But it turns out she doesn't do the upgrade service anymore because she married one of
Starting point is 01:16:23 her regulars and he doesn't do the upgrade service anymore because she married one of her regulars. And he doesn't want her doing upgrades anymore. So like, sometimes people find their person in very unusual methods. I could see them like possibly falling in love, but if you're not hanging out outside of this, I feel like that's a little bit of a red flag, no? I wonder if they've hung out. Let me see if there's any comments. What did OP say?
Starting point is 01:16:46 What's OP? Original post. Oh. Original poster. Original poster. So OP responds to a comment. Yes, that's what I believe is she's telling me what she thinks I want to hear.
Starting point is 01:17:00 I only want to hear her reality. But the problem is she began this by telling me she loves me multiple times over a period of time. I didn't react at all for a good while." So I don't know, maybe OP is kind of doubting if the I love you is real or not. Now I've developed feelings for her, but her actions as I've spent more time with her lead me to be more confused of her actual motivation and intentions
Starting point is 01:17:27 More time with her while while they're in session. Would you have any suggestions on how to elicit her real intentions? Go out just ask. Yeah, just be like hey like obviously like we've been like seeing each other, you know This type of way To be honest, like I know we've been saying we love each other. Like I genuinely mean that. And I would like to like go out to dinner and actually hang out outside of, you know, work. Yeah. Usual encounter. He's 66 and she's 44. Yes. 61.
Starting point is 01:18:00 61. 61. Yeah. Oh, I'm surprised. I didn't think 61 year olds even, I read it. Yeah. Oh, I'm surprised. I didn't think 61 year old even, I read it. Okay. Oh, they're, yeah. Boomers know. They know what's up. No, it's just, it's just interesting.
Starting point is 01:18:12 I like just can't imagine just 61 year old going behind the computer like, hmm. Well, especially on my sub, like I'm kind of- Oh, this is on yours? This is on mine. Like my sub is kind of sneaky. Oh. So he- He's in it.
Starting point is 01:18:23 He's in it. Oh, so every single one we're listening, we're reading off, they're listening on this podcast? Most today have been from 2hot takes subreddit. Yeah. Cool. I know. But they like usually listen. Oh no.
Starting point is 01:18:35 I thought we were never... That they're not going to hear our answers. Yeah. Shit. No, it's good. We've been very, we've been on it today. I feel like our responses have been really thoughtful. Exactly, yeah.
Starting point is 01:18:47 Something to consider with this too, is OP does comment and say, I'm right now, I'm still contributing 70% of her monthly income. So it sounds like he's really kind of a pay pig, in a sense. Like a sugar daddy type? Yeah, and that would be hard because it's like,
Starting point is 01:19:04 she's kind of mentioning to him, like, I don't know what else I would do with my life. And like, he wants a relationship. So it's like, do you give someone an allowance so they stop having to do that? Or like, do you help her find another job and then say, hey, let's go on a date, see if we actually like each other
Starting point is 01:19:22 outside of the pain relationship? Like, it would be a really tough conversation to have. That is, because, let's go on a date, see if we actually like each other outside of the pain relationship. It would be a really tough conversation to have. That is, because if he's providing 70% when they start dating, there's probably no services anymore and that's 70% of her income. And then- So maybe she does really like him then.
Starting point is 01:19:37 And that's why she's given up other clients. Exactly, because she knows that he's not like, is he gonna pay for everything for her? I mean, that's not what I'm thinking that she's thinking But she has to think a little bit financially about this decision. She's making yeah There's another comment where OP says we're not dating in the sense that she doesn't spend any time with me off the clock So, I don't know. I feel like my gut says she's not into it and she's, I feel like I side with Heath a little bit.
Starting point is 01:20:07 I would say, hypothetically, if you're paying for an hour and she's not hanging out after that hour just to spend genuinely, like genuine time with you and to talk and hang out. Oh, that's good. That's a good way to tell. Oh, you say you love me so much, but as soon as that time hits an hour, you're out the door? But I have a feeling she is spending longer than the hour. He said that they're not... No, no, I know, I know, but like I think that time still counts as like part of like the...
Starting point is 01:20:36 I don't think he's paying for the session, but I think she is staying a little longer and that's probably why he's like, oh, maybe she does like me because she's staying a little longer. It's still technically during session, it's just why he's like, oh, maybe she does like me because she's staying a little longer. It's still technically during session is just session has gone over, but he's not paying extra time for it. But he's also paying 70% of her income. Oof, we need a little bit more context here, OP. Come on. Let us know. You're going to hear it. You're going to see it. I always say also go with your gut.
Starting point is 01:21:01 I feel like deep down he knows what it really is and it's either one thing or it's the other. And sometimes it's hard to accept it if it's not the answer you want. But I feel like he probably knows if she actually loves him or if he feels like he's being. Yeah. I kind of want to have them both on the pod. Let's send him an invite.
Starting point is 01:21:21 Have them come here and then he and I will come back. I would love to facilitate like couples therapy, not that I'm a qualified therapist by any means, but I do do that at some live shows. I ask people that are coming to the shows to submit a problem they're having that has two sides and then we'll go and talk to both of them and like hash it out. Oh wow. Yeah. One of the biggest ones was this couple in Irvine.
Starting point is 01:21:46 Love you guys. He got her a vacuum for her Valentine's Day gift. Beautiful gift. Vacuuming is the only chore that he had to do. Oh. Yeah, so it was a really heated debate with everyone. Hey. He had to have thought that in his brain before he buying it. Like, he knew what he was doing.
Starting point is 01:22:09 There's no way he didn't know. He really, I don't think, it kind of just escaped him. Oh, you really think he didn't know? Yeah, he was so nice. He was like, I really thought it was, it wasn't that bad. I mean, if it was a Dyson, man. It was a really nice Roomba, I believe. Okay.
Starting point is 01:22:26 It was the one you plug into the, that does it. It's the little, with the iPhone charger. Is that little one, the cute one, the portable one? I will say for Valentine's Day, when I was living with my parents, I think I was in high school, my dad did get my mom a CD to a person
Starting point is 01:22:45 that she had no idea who it was. And it was like his favorite country singer. So it was a gift for him. My mom was like, what the fuck is this? Why would you get me this? Oh my God. And I just remember like, it was a really funny moment. And then my dad took the CD and put it in his car.
Starting point is 01:23:03 They're still married. They're doing great. Okay. It's just like a funny little thing. But my mom's like, what is this? What the fuck? Okay. I'm giving you guys a choice on the last one. Okay. We have had quite a few weddings and engagement ones.
Starting point is 01:23:18 It's the season with it, but I'm giving you an option because there is one that's not that. And I'm kind of now I'm realizing making Zayn here kind of sit through weddings and engagements. And babies and breast milk. And babies and breast milk. And hookers and escorts. So I'm gonna let, maybe we'll let you choose, okay?
Starting point is 01:23:36 Okay. So option one is, am I the asshole for not speaking Japanese after living here for six years? Option two, am I the asshole for giving my ex-fiance a fake engagement ring? And option three, am I the asshole for calling my brother a hypocrite for refusing to come to my wedding because it's child-free? I like the second one. Door number two. Yeah, door number two. Pick number three, my lord. That is, come on. That's exciting. The other, like the first one, it's like,
Starting point is 01:24:09 I already know where it's going. So that one, the third one was just like, yeah, sure. No kids at a wedding. Yeah, we got it. But that fake wedding ring. Here we go. I need to hear this one. This is 13 hours old coming from AITAH, titled, Am I the Asshole for Giving My Ex-Fiance a Fake Engagement Ring? It was an honest to God marriage proposal. I very much wanted to marry her. She is just a klutz and I didn't trust her
Starting point is 01:24:38 with the real thing. I took her to Coachella for the second weekend and to propose. It was a great time and she got to see no doubt who she loves because her dad used to listen with her when she was a baby. Wow, remember there? So it feels like so. Anyways, I asked her to marry me and she said yes. She loved the ring. I had it sized, but
Starting point is 01:24:59 it was the brass and moissanite copy I had made so she would not lose or damage the real one at the concert. Which she promptly did. And then she pretended not to. She said it was too tight and that she had put it away until we got back to Phoenix. When we got back, she asked me where I got the ring. I told her and she tried to replace it. Until they told her how much it cost.
Starting point is 01:25:24 She came to my place crying to tell me she lost the ring and to beg for my forgiveness. I told her right away that it was no big deal because I had the real one with me and we could go get it sized perfectly so that she wouldn't lose it. Yeah, perfect. My mistake, because she fucking lost it.
Starting point is 01:25:42 She went off on me for making her not enjoy the weekend because she was worried sick that she had lost her ring. If she had told me she had lost it, I would have just told her the truth. Yeah. That I didn't want to take any chances with her ring at that massive venue. She screamed at me that I was a complete asshole
Starting point is 01:26:02 to make her worry like that. She said a lot of stuff that I guess had been building for a while and she said things she could not take back. Oh. I told her to get out. She asked for her real ring. I said, nope. I am not marrying someone who thinks this is a way
Starting point is 01:26:18 to behave towards me. I told her she had to leave or I would get the security guys to get her out. Ooh, that's bad. She is only signed in as a guest, so it is not a big deal for me to get her out. I feel like I dodged a bullet, but also kind of feel bad that I didn't tell her at the concert that it was fake so she wouldn't worry. My parents are wondering why we broke up and I really don't know what to say. No, you can tell them.
Starting point is 01:26:43 I think that was definitely something up there. Universe, baby. That was a universe. That was a moment that the universe created as a test. And it wasn't even that crazy of a test. This is insane though. It was insane. It was, for her to be upset with him,
Starting point is 01:26:59 for her losing a fake wedding ring is absolutely insane. And you didn't tell him that you lost it. So it's like, he couldn't help you out in any way. But you didn't tell him that you lost it. So it's like, he couldn't help you out in any way, but you know what? You did lose that ring. And when it came down, you, he, she lost it. So he was right. So he was right. He was justified. And it was just, he was just doing it for you in the end of the day. It's your ring and he didn't want you to lose it. It's very special. Which how thoughtful is that? To get you, not only do you have a real one waiting for you at home, but he got you a fake copy so that you can have fun and not worry about it.
Starting point is 01:27:30 Be carefree. Went out of his way to do a fake one. That's, spent more money to make a fake ring. Extra money. Moissanite's like, yeah, they're less than diamonds, but like you still have to spend a decent amount for a Moissanite. Like. Wow. I mean, yeah. but like you still have to spend a decent amount for a moissanite. Like... Wow. I mean, yeah.
Starting point is 01:27:47 I think that was a sign. And yeah, as you said, you definitely dodged a bullet on that one. 100%. And especially the reaction you got. I feel bad. I feel bad you got that reaction and you were gas lit. That's tough.
Starting point is 01:28:01 Like he was probably in like, he was on his honeymoon stage at this point. Like he was so excited for her and like that. Instead of her being relieved that it was a fake one and that the real one was safe and okay and that, you know, there is nothing to worry about. It was just blame. That, that's bad. Yeah, that sucks. I just have a feeling that he bought her Coachella ticket too. It's giving, it's giving free ride. Yeah, it's giving, it's giving gold digger.
Starting point is 01:28:34 And then wanting the ring after? Yes, that! You just told this person despicable things. You're done. He told you to get out and you ask for the ring? No way. You're not engaged anymore, sweetie. That's not yours. You're supposed to give the ring back
Starting point is 01:28:49 if you call it off, right? Yes, unless you propose on holidays. Like if you propose on Valentine's Day or Christmas, it can technically be perceived as a gift and therefore doesn't have to be given back. Oh, like you mean like legal wise. Yes. Oh, did not know that.
Starting point is 01:29:05 So if there's a shot that your engagement isn't going to work out, do not propose on a holiday because otherwise you're not entitled to getting the ring back. Ladies try to get that ring on that Valentine's day, baby. Make it work. Mariah, like I got a Thanksgiving gift. Oh, shit. Was it Black Friday? I was just on Thanksgiving.
Starting point is 01:29:25 It was on Thanksgiving. It counts, it's a gift. That's so funny. Isn't that wild? I did not know that. Yeah, yeah. So I've seen on legal advice. Good to know.
Starting point is 01:29:35 I know, it's crazy. That's crazy. Yeah, people are like kinda coming for him in the comments a little bit. Really? Well, only in regards to, you should have told her way sooner. No.
Starting point is 01:29:47 And OP goes, I told her within seconds of finding out she lost it. How much quicker should I have let her know? And the person goes, sorry, I meant after you proposed. I don't know. Maybe that's just kind of my relationship. And also you have to think about it.
Starting point is 01:30:01 It's another surprise he was probably trying to do when they got home. Maybe, yeah. By the way, here's the real wedding think about it. It's another surprise he was probably trying to do when they got home. Like, by the way, here's the real wedding ring or... I will say this. We don't know exactly how long he had planned to hold the real one. Cause he went into it knowing that she was kind of clumsy with belongings and he was probably gonna do it
Starting point is 01:30:24 and let her hold that fake one until she did eventually lose it. Maybe. Because that's what it seems like to me. Well no, he said that he proposed to her at Coachella. Right. Which like, that is the place to use a fake ring. Coachella just happened.
Starting point is 01:30:38 No, I know. I'm saying he could have let her wear that fake ring until she did eventually lose it because he had already gone into it thinking That it was gonna get lost. Yeah, and to keep the back up for when that does happen Yeah, so it didn't seem like he was gonna go about and tell her that hey, by the way, that's a fake one I'm trying to see if there's any comments giving us info about when he was gonna give her the real one and kind of share the info Holy shit you guys he was gonna give her the real one and kind of share the info.
Starting point is 01:31:05 Holy shit, you guys. Someone accuses him of tricking her. Like you tricked her and he goes, trick her how? I had the real $17,000 ring at home for her. It wasn't like a placeholder was all she was ever getting. Thank God he didn't give her the real one. Wow. Wow. Wow.
Starting point is 01:31:25 $17,000 ring. Imagine finding a $17,000 ring at Coachella. Dude. I lost a Cartier ring down here on Ventura Boulevard somewhere. Really? Slipped off my finger after freshly applied hand sanitizer from Lululemon. Gone. Yeah, now I got another one,
Starting point is 01:31:45 and this time I put spikes on it. On the inside? Yeah. What do you mean spikes? You can do that? Yeah, I'll show you. Is it just like- It's teeth.
Starting point is 01:31:53 You can put teeth on the inside of your rings, and then it keeps it on there. See that? You can feel it if you want. It's a little warm from my hand. Do you feel the spikes? Like it doesn't write up your hand No, it just like it holds it in place. It like does give you a little mark, but like
Starting point is 01:32:12 It's not going anywhere So, I don't know. I I don't feel like he did anything wrong like I Don't know. It's just it's I would love to meet the both of them I would love to meet them like these stories is just I hate that I don't like see a face to it. I don't know. It's just, it's crazy. I would love to meet the both of them. I would love to meet them. Like these stories, I hate that I don't like see a face to it. I don't see... I feel like I'm on like Maury. Maury? Maury. Jerry Springer a little bit. It's every week for me.
Starting point is 01:32:37 You guys can come back whenever. You're welcome anytime. Top comment on this one. LOL, I like how after she did all of that, she asked you for the real ring. Not the asshole. Yeah, not. And OP does go, like he, there's a lot of comments from him in these, this thread. There was no, I told you so.
Starting point is 01:33:00 I thought she would actually be relieved, not a psycho. I didn't know she lost the ring at Coachella. I thought she just genuinely put it away like she told me. The minute I realized she lost the ring, I did my best to reassure her it was no big deal and told her it was a placeholder. So I don't think, asshole, like blessing in disguise all the way around, it doesn't look like there's any updates, but yeah.
Starting point is 01:33:28 It's almost like she wanted to lose that real, like she was, like I just can't like, I can't wrap my head around why she would be upset. Like you would have lost a $17,000 ring. Yeah. Maybe she wanted to pawn that fake one, thinking it was real. It's giving free Coachella trip, $17,000 ring. Like maybe she's got that sugar baby mentality a little bit.
Starting point is 01:33:50 I don't know. Like to ask for that ring after you are breaking up. How did she know it was fake? He eventually did tell her that was a fake placeholder. I have the real one. I had a feeling she already knew. You think so? I don'tholder. I have the real one. I had a feeling she already knew. You think so? I don't know.
Starting point is 01:34:06 I'm so curious. We need more OP. Why would she come back and be like, where'd you buy it from? It's almost like, why is that like coming out of nowhere? Where'd you buy it from? That I thought because it was like, she was trying to sneakily replace it on her own. And then when she went to the store, thinking it was like they told her, oh, that's 17 grand, she freaked out crying. But at that point, wouldn't you kind of be like, well, why is she asking me where I got it from?
Starting point is 01:34:34 And also why are you telling her where you got the real one from knowing she wasn't wearing the real one? You know? Tell her where you got the fake one from. Exactly. Moissanite. Five, five carats.
Starting point is 01:34:47 Well, they don't do carrots for Moissanite. It was an eight by 10 millimeter. It was a six by 10. How much do those cost? It depends. There's a lot of like, I feel like there's a big movement for Moissanite right now. It's pretty affordable. I went with Moissanite.
Starting point is 01:35:01 I love it. Oh, like for the real wedding ring? For my engagement ring, it's Moissanite. I love it. Oh like for the real wedding ring for my engagement ring. It's moissanite You'd never know I just but like what's the difference in price like I don't price huge huge Oh, really? Yeah, like this like in an actual diamond Anywhere from 40 to 60 K for the size Wow, that's just that's yeah, that's like the savings I'm not doing that. No, that's how much a diamond that's what a diamond this size would be Wow It's like the savings. I'm not doing that. No, that's how much a diamond that size would be. That's what a diamond this size would be. Wow.
Starting point is 01:35:26 It's like the prices of diamonds, they're astronomical. Yeah. I don't think it's worth it. Just like, and if you lose it, like, you know, hopefully you lose it, you just replace it with another moissanite, but it's not $60,000 or you're fucking replacing it. Yeah, no. To each their own. Like if you have the go fuck you money or whatever, like you
Starting point is 01:35:45 want to spend 200k on a ring. Like there's some people that like Victoria Beckham, she's got one of her rings. She has 15 engagement rings by the way. One of them is over a million dollars. So like they can obviously do that. But like, I would rather buy a horse than a- A horse, a million dollar horse? Well like, you know, just like- Seabiscuits. A budget friendly horse. A good horse.
Starting point is 01:36:12 Yeah. Like a really fast horse. Yeah, I just bought one. How much is a good horse? You can get a good one for, I think, depends on where you live. Horse prices have actually gone through the roof lately too. There's inflation on horses.
Starting point is 01:36:25 Oh yeah. They get everything. I think you can get a good, good one. Well trained, broke good head on him. 10 grand. Oh, okay. For like a baby? No, like a trained older one.
Starting point is 01:36:38 Okay. Six, seven, eight. What's the lifespan? 30 years. Wow. Yeah, it's a commitment. Wow, you can grow up with him. I still have my pony from when I was five. Really?
Starting point is 01:36:49 That's cool. He's a little cutie. What's his name? Konya. Konya? He was named after Konyak, the liquor. Oh, shit. Loose, loosely.
Starting point is 01:36:57 Okay. But thank you guys so much for coming on. Wow, that was great. Thank you for having us. Where can everyone find you guys? Listen to your show. So we have two shows. One is a brand new show that we just started with Alicia Marie and Remy Cruz. It's called basically unfiltered.
Starting point is 01:37:15 We had to change it a couple of weeks ago. Oh no. Legalities. Legalities. Basically unfiltered. We post every Thursday on youtube.com slash pretty ex unfiltered right now We have to switch it later And then we have our show that we've been doing for five years called Zane and Heath Unfiltered
Starting point is 01:37:30 We post every Tuesdays on our channel youtube.com slash Zane and Heath and it's It's a good time. It's you know podcast with two uneducated Florida boys. Yeah, don't change it. It's so good We'll keep it. It's so good. And thank you again for having us. This was great. This was really good. I can't believe how like you just want more.
Starting point is 01:37:49 I know. It's literally that is why I started this podcast. It just sucks you in. It does. And then when you get like a little update, oof. And you'll never stop either. There's always going to be problems around the world and you'll always have them. Always.
Starting point is 01:38:03 That's why we're here every week. All of Zayn and Heath's links will be in the description of the podcast. Check out their show. It is hilarious. Fun. You're just having a good time. Thank you. I'm going to start submitting on your little subreddit.
Starting point is 01:38:19 Whenever I have a problem with anybody. Oh my God. I'm going to have to question. Hey, so I have a podcast host that he's getting married and I feel like he's at a different stage of life than me and he's moving to Chattanooga. That's funny. Oh my God. Until next time guys.
Starting point is 01:38:38 Bye. Bye!

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