Two Hot Takes - 6: Cheating or Nah? Hard to Tell With Gaslighting

Episode Date: March 18, 2021

Two Hot Takes host, Morgan, is joined by one of her best friends and guest co-host, Alejandra Nagel. Episode includes blind reactions to Reddit stories about some of the most interning potential cheat...ers and confirmed cheater stories! Stories include a girl whose boyfriend is sharing lube with a friend, a girl whose sister was dating her biological father, and a mother who is tied up in a family war due to one daughter cheating with the other daughter's fiancé.  Show your support (much appreciated): https://www.patreon.com/TwoHotTakes Full length Video episodes available on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/TwoHotTakes

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hi, Jan from Toyota speaking. Jan, I heard it's a good time to buy a Toyota. Sure is. From now until April 4th, you can shop all your favorites, like Corolla, RAV4, Sequoia, and more. Imagine yourself in a new tundra where... You stopped by the home improvement store and finally built that tree house you promised your daughter.
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Starting point is 00:01:01 Are you ready to go today? Yeah, let's fucking do it. Let's drop up. I told you the topics that I was thinking about pitching to you, and I said cheaters, and you jumped. I jumped, I stretched. I was like, I've been waiting fucking years for this. Put me in the game, coach.
Starting point is 00:01:21 I've been warming up, and I am fucking ready to talk some truth. Oh, my gosh. Today, you guys, you have the pleasure of having one of my best friends, Miss Alejandra Nagel. Hey, guys. Join on this episode of Two Hot Takes. Alejandra and I have been friends since, like, I don't know, 2014, something, six years.
Starting point is 00:01:46 2014, 2015. It's been a minute. We've been through some good times. Yeah, some rough times. Yelling at each other in Ubers, but... Oh, shit. Loving each other at the end of the day. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:01:58 We're still here. Still here, still here. Good times, too. God, this girl, we just celebrated my 27th birthday, but I think it was my 23rd. She got me on stage at this pre-Coachella concert, and Snoop Dogg was the headliner. It was actually a pretty big deal.
Starting point is 00:02:16 She scoped us some tickets from the owner of the Indiopolo Ground, and literally, like, got us on stage, and I was, like, three feet away from Snoop Dogg, like, in the back alley. Like, it was insane. We've been through it. We've been through it.
Starting point is 00:02:32 We've been through it. But way more good times. So, when I met Morgan, it was at We Fast, and if you are from Minnesota, then you know what the fuck We Fast is, and if you're not from Minnesota, then Google it. We Fast is, like, the country festival. It's, like, it's, like, stagecoach,
Starting point is 00:02:46 but, like, it's like the Walmart of stagecoach. But I think it's 10 times more fun. It's crazy. It's, like, insane. It's a shit show in the best way. Maybe we should go back. Just say when. Post-COVID.
Starting point is 00:02:58 Let's do it. I will fucking go back. Let's go. But it is a humbling experience, and when I met Morgan, Morgan had the luxury of staying in a camper, and I was in a fucking tent, like, a peasant. And I was introduced to Morgan.
Starting point is 00:03:10 That's actually the first time we met. I don't know if you know that. Yeah. Yeah. No, I remember. Like, the very first time. My camper slash truck was, like, the charging port. That's 100% accurate.
Starting point is 00:03:20 For, like, everyone. Everyone used to, like, come to my truck and, like, charge their phones. Yeah. Because at We Fast, like I said, a humbling experience, no electricity, you don't have an outlet. No.
Starting point is 00:03:28 So I was like, I have to charge my phone. So somehow I get connected to Morgan in her fucking palace, which is a camper. It was not a palace, you guys. It was a palace. Like, someone shit in my camper's toilet, which you weren't supposed to do. So the next couple days of this music festival,
Starting point is 00:03:41 we had to deal with, like, a fucking just shit storm in our toilet. And that's probably the least of the worries, because to me, that's how bad We Fast is. But We Fast is terrible. Like, people flipped over the porta-potties while you were in there. Oh, my God, I forgot.
Starting point is 00:03:53 I forgot. Yeah, maybe we don't want to go back. Well, anyway, I meet Morgan. Morgan is pitching a horse trailer. Or she's pitching a truck to a camper. Yeah. She's pitching a truck to a camper, which Morgan is five, three?
Starting point is 00:04:05 Five, two. And a half? Five, two. Okay. On a good day. And she's wearing, like, her wedges. And she's pitching a trailer to a camper. And I'm, like...
Starting point is 00:04:15 That's a little scrappy one. This bitch. I don't even know her, but I fuck with her. And so here we are. Here we are. God. I was, like, seven, eight years ago now. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:04:24 That was early. That was, like, 2013. Yeah, for sure. So, yeah, we are. We're almost eight years. Almost eight years. Look at us. Happy eight years.
Starting point is 00:04:32 But we're here to talk cheaters and all the things. So buckle the fuck up. Yeah. Buckle the fuck up. Our personal experience is about to just pop this topic off. We've been hurt once or twice, and it shows. Yeah. But we're better, not bitter.
Starting point is 00:04:49 Exactly. We tweet. I remember that being one of my Instagram captions after a bad breakup. I probably tweeted that, like, more than once. If you follow me on Instagram, I'm sure it's still there. Gonna bury that when I get home. Archive it. Okay, but let's dive in.
Starting point is 00:05:03 All right, let's do it. Let's talk cheaters. Back to the cheaters. Back to the cheaters. My boyfriend shares our lube with his best friend. Why? I don't, I don't know because lube is not expensive. No.
Starting point is 00:05:40 At all. You can even go and buy my go-to favorite coconut oil for, like, eight bucks. You get a big jar, and it can last you a year, depending on how much you like. It's dual use. You can cook with it. Exactly. There's a lot of things. It's the best about the world.
Starting point is 00:05:54 It really is. So the fact that you're sharing lube with someone, just right off the bat. Why? Why? Like, you don't know where your friend is. Do we have ages? Where he's been. We do have ages.
Starting point is 00:06:05 Okay, let's figure it out. So today, I, 25 female, was looking for my boyfriend's 27 males headphones. I looked in his backpack and found the bottle of lube that we use. When I asked him about it, he lied and said that it's in there because he was picking things up from our living room and put it in there. After pressuring him some more, because the lube was in a pocket all by itself, he finally admitted that it was in there because he took it to his best friend, but forgot to give it to him.
Starting point is 00:06:33 So. Change in his story real fast. So not only are you sharing lube, but you're actually acting as like door dashers for each other and you're bringing it to each other? Yeah. Like, Hey, Morgan, um, I need the lube tonight. Little fishy. Like why?
Starting point is 00:06:47 Why? I would be more convenient for the friend to just run to a CVS, Walgreens, Rite Aid. Yeah. They're on every corner. Yes. 7-11 has lube. Yes. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:59 Whoa. Every gas station has lube. Okay. So she, I, this one's just really weird for a lot of reasons because even if he's cheating, like, first of all, why does he have a backpack? Second of all. At 27. Second of all, like he's, he's like loading up his backpack and like he's putting lube
Starting point is 00:07:14 in the backpack to go cheat on her. That seems so like, I don't, I don't know. Like maybe she'll get to it, but I just don't understand why you would ever share something that's so cheap with your friend and like a sexual thing. Like that's like, I don't want to say it's like sharing a condom, but kind of is like, it's a sexual thing or like sharing a sex toy. Like, yeah, yeah. It's like, you're using that with your partner.
Starting point is 00:07:39 Who knows who your friend's sleeping with? Like, granted, you probably do know, but like, where's that person been? It's the convenience for me. Like, yeah. Like they're making it harder than it needs to be making it so much harder than it needs to be. Yeah. Like cause most of the times, not most, but like an impromptu fuck at two in the morning,
Starting point is 00:07:58 you're telling me that you'd rather text your buddy to bring you your shared bottle of lube instead of just running to CVS, door dashing CVS, whatever. Yeah. Getting lube. It reminds me of McLovin from Superman. Oh my God. Like, why would you share lube? That just.
Starting point is 00:08:17 It doesn't make any sense. If he's not cheating, we've got other issues. We've got other problems because I just, the sharing of lube is enough. Yeah. No, I think the fact that he's changing his story real fast though, like definitely cheating. Oh, um, I put it in my backpack because I was cleaning the living room. Why was the lube in the living room?
Starting point is 00:08:34 Did you guys fuck there? If so, okay. Maybe it adds up then. Yeah. But otherwise, not so much. But poop. Like you're cleaning up, you put it in your backpack. What for?
Starting point is 00:08:44 No, you just walk it back to your bedside drawer or wherever you keep it. Yeah. Why would you just put it in your backpack? Yeah. I don't clean up my room and like, be like, oh, let me put this like sex toy in my purse. Yeah. No. Fishy.
Starting point is 00:08:55 Fishy. My next sex adventure. That's for what? Yeah. So she goes on to say he lied because I've gotten upset at the first time over a year ago that he gave his friend lube. Okay. Girl.
Starting point is 00:09:08 Girl, girl, girl. So. All right. Just keep it coming. I didn't really get upset. I was just confused and weirded out that they share lube. Yes. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:18 Rightfully so. Thank God you see the light. It's weird. This is not normal. Like don't share lube with your friends. It's super weird. Yeah. It's just like.
Starting point is 00:09:26 At 25 and 27. It's not expensive. Like I just, there's something off here. Yeah. My first thought was that they were using it together. Oh. Oh. I didn't think about that one.
Starting point is 00:09:38 Like a threesome. Or he's just cheating with his friend. Like he's gay. Yeah. That would be such a plot twist. That would be. This time, apparently his friend, his friend's girlfriend and my boyfriend were having a convo about anal sex and he suggested that they try our lube and apparently he wasn't
Starting point is 00:10:00 going to let them keep it because it's too expensive. I'm so confused, grossed out and weirded out. I don't know whether to believe him. I can't help but think that he took the lube to use it with someone else. Yeah. No, I'm, I think he totally took it to use it with someone else. Like no matter how expensive the lube is, like if, especially if they're doing anal sex, like what are you going to do?
Starting point is 00:10:20 Let them squeeze the lube out on their hands. Use it. Rub it all over her butt. Like his dick that's going in her butt. Like E. coli one. Yeah. First of all, we're in a pan. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:32 And then what if they need more? Like you're letting her let poop hands then touch your expensive lube again. Okay. So she said it's expensive. Did I, did I hear that right? Yeah. Okay. So why, first of all, if I'm her, I'm Googling this lube.
Starting point is 00:10:42 I'm figuring out just how fucking expensive because if anything less than a hundred fucking dollars and it's not laced with gold, then I don't understand what the deal is. Yeah. Honestly, if I give you my lube and you use it, I don't want it back. It's yours. No. Happy birthday. I don't need that.
Starting point is 00:10:56 Exactly. But if you really want your friend to try this, order him some for a present. If it's expensive and you're worried about it, just say, no man, you get your own lube. Try this. It's going to be great. What? You'll love it. No.
Starting point is 00:11:09 It's tried and tested. I've never heard of anyone like this. Lube is so incredible and it's so expensive that I need you to just borrow it. No. No. I do have like, so when I was trying to turn everyone on to the coconut oil. Yeah. I remember that.
Starting point is 00:11:23 We were out one night in Manhattan Beach. I remember that. Oh my God. When you said that, I flashed back to that bar, I couldn't tell you the name in Manhattan Beach. We're like in a booth. Yeah. Yes.
Starting point is 00:11:35 I don't even remember who we were with, but you could probably refresh that. Yeah. It was like me, you, Sarah and Lauren. Sure. But guy wise, we were with guy. Oh, that guy. Okay. Not my bride.
Starting point is 00:11:43 No. No. Other one. So we like went back to his place because we were all like super hungry and they just made chili or something. So we like went back to his place to get chili. Really? Really?
Starting point is 00:11:52 That is not ringing. Yeah. That is a brand that not ringing you, bro. And so we're like, we're like going back to get this chili and like it was a shore walk because Manhattan Beach, California is there like beach town, small, you can walk, tell the bars, whatever. And so. Pretty panty.
Starting point is 00:12:05 I was like talking to Sarah and I was like, yeah, like, oh, like if you hook up with that guy later, like blah, blah, blah, like if I hook up with someone later, like I'm going to use coconut oil. And she's like, coconut oil? What? And I was like, yeah, no, like try it. It's amazing. She's like, I'm good.
Starting point is 00:12:19 So I literally go and grab coconut oil out of his kitchen cupboard. Yeah. And I like start slathering it on Sarah's arm. Can I revise the story though, because for some reason I thought you did this at the bar. No. Really? No, this was Adam.
Starting point is 00:12:35 At his house. At his house. Hmm. Okay. Go on. Yeah. But I don't even know if you came with to get chili. That's where I think you lost me.
Starting point is 00:12:43 I think we went. And I think I stayed behind. Really quick to get chili. And then I think we went back to the bar. I think you did. Like it was just like a quick little snack. Really run. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:52 Nothing to see here. We were like back. And I think like me and Sarah walked in and we were just like, yes, I remember some weird shit happening. Like you guys left for whatever reason. Chili. For chili. That's why I don't remember the chili.
Starting point is 00:13:04 I was like, I'm a chili fanatic and I think I would remember a chili. Yeah. It was beef though. You're right. I'm out. I'm out. Maybe that's why I stayed back. I was like, nope.
Starting point is 00:13:14 I think it is. You weren't interested in the, in the beef. You lost me. Yeah. Um, okay. Yes. I do remember this night. And you sold her on the idea.
Starting point is 00:13:22 Yeah. Yeah. And so it's like, I love the coconut oil, but I wouldn't give someone my bedside jar. Yeah. You would, if anything, go buy them a jar. Yeah. And a little bowl on it. Here you go.
Starting point is 00:13:36 Want, really want you to try this. I know you're not going to go buy it yourself. Here's some coconut oil. However, I understand this is an expensive lube and you don't want to just buy them a bottle of it because they may not even like it, but really like how much is the most expensive lube? How good is this fucking lube? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:51 I'm just so obsessed with lube. Like just have good sex and you don't need it. I'm going to, I'm going to disagree with that. I'm going to disagree with that. Because you love lube. I, I think good lube heightens the experience one also you've had a few drinks and you're a little dehydrated. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:06 You don't got to wop some days. Can't relate. She's kidding. You know, it just, I just, I don't know. Old age has gone to me. I don't know. You're not old first of all. I literally turned 27 two days ago and third.
Starting point is 00:14:22 Um, okay. I'm not knocking lube. I know. I love my coconut. You're an advocate. Absolutely. Love it. I know that.
Starting point is 00:14:30 Love that. See that. Um, top, bottom. I mean, use it. Use it everywhere. Maybe that's what I'm missing out on. It's incredible. So I'm not going to knock it, but I also think like the whole, the fact that this whole story
Starting point is 00:14:41 hinges on lube is really getting to me because it shouldn't be that serious. No, he's definitely cheating. You think? I would, I would literally just like, I would ask, I would literally ask his friend and be like, like awkwardly, like kind of catch them off guard where they're like all together. Oh, you enjoy the lube, huh? Yeah. Like, Hey, did you ever, did you ever try that lube that we have?
Starting point is 00:15:01 And he's like, what are you talking about? Yeah. Then it's like liar. I don't know. But then there's just, maybe I've gotten in too deep with like very severe lies, but like they can spend that later because then he can be like, Oh, he was just embarrassed. He didn't want you to know we were sharing lube. So there's way too many ways to lie out of it.
Starting point is 00:15:17 I honestly think if you're looking at this, like, I'm a pretty, I think I'm a rational person. If I look at this, are you, you're really going to break up with your boyfriend because he shares lube with his friend and you happen to find it in his backpack. And that was enough for you to jump to the conclusion that he's cheating. I just think it's too weird. I need more. It's weird, weird flex.
Starting point is 00:15:34 Yes. But I need more. I don't know. I think it's weird. The top comment goes, it's normal that you think he's possibly cheated. I'm a guy and my thoughts went there instantly as well because who the fuck shares lube. And expensive total BS. You can buy decent lube for like 20 bucks, sometimes even 10 for sure.
Starting point is 00:15:53 You get it next day. Amazon delivery. Yeah. This is weird. Yeah. I'm glad we agree as a community that sharing lube sharing lube is just weird. It's inappropriate. I've never heard of it.
Starting point is 00:16:05 Yeah. It's inappropriate. We're in a pandemic in any, in any world you shouldn't be sharing lube, but especially in this world today, absolutely not. I mean, God, there's so many other things that I'm like, I just feel great. Gross. I just know what happens to my lube and it's just like, you know where your lube's been. It just, to not go near anyone else, it really shouldn't.
Starting point is 00:16:26 It's also just like, you keep your shit in the bedroom. Yeah. I don't know that's, I don't know. I don't know if he's actually was cheating, but there was something weird. It's weird. 100%. Weird. 100%.
Starting point is 00:16:37 Yeah. Got to walk the dogs, school drop off, meetings from 10 to 3, take kids to soccer practice, then there goes the extra time for a jog. That's okay. Maybe next week. When everyone else relies on you, it's easy to put your needs last. Therapy is a dedicated time to focus on what you need to be happy. So you can show up for yourself the way you do for others.
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Starting point is 00:17:37 This next one is Family Cheating, which the title is very interesting and I kind of relate to it in the sense that if I tried to explain my family to anyone, I would need a Venn diagram. Whatever those fucking tree family tree charts are, that's what I need to explain my family. So the title is, Am I the Asshole for Telling My Sister She Was Dating My Biological Father? Hold on. Oh my God. What? I need time to process this.
Starting point is 00:18:11 My sister, they must have not been blood related, right? I'm going to go if it's biodad. I'm going to think it's kind of like my family where we all have the same mom, but different dad. Okay. Okay. She goes, so my life's turned into a bloody soap opera recently and I could use some outside opinions here.
Starting point is 00:18:29 I, 24 female, and the product of my mom having an affair. Fortunately, my dad decided to forgive my mom and keep me and I had a pretty good upbringing, but I don't really look a lot like the rest of my family. I'm the only redhead among other things. And I did ask questions of why am I the only one with insert trait here? What is this trait that we have to be so elusive? Is it like too identifying or like, why won't she tell us? Like, well, there's some like silly ones where like Widow's Peak is genetic, how you cross
Starting point is 00:19:02 your thumbs. You're on Reddit and we're here. Just tell us, just tell us, right? When I was 17, my mom took me out for ice cream and introduced me to my bio father. She said that she felt I was old enough to know the truth and explained about her affair. Well, also, A, making me promise I wouldn't tell my older sister, 27 female in the present. Okay. So only a three-year age gap between the two of them.
Starting point is 00:19:26 Okay. And B, hammering home along with my bio dad that he'd never be a part of my life and didn't want me. It was a lot. I won't lie. But I learned to suck it up and move on with my life fast forward to the present. My big sister has always gravitated towards older men. Same sis.
Starting point is 00:19:46 Same. We like to joke that it's the result of too many George Clooney movies growing up. Love George Clooney. I know. He's so cool. You just love his wife. I love his wife. Damn it.
Starting point is 00:19:59 You caught me. I was just thinking it's really fucking a mall that I'm getting off to. Fucking badass. World like human rights. Human rights lawyer. Yeah. She works for the UN or something. Yeah, she does.
Starting point is 00:20:09 That's my dream job. So I'm like, oh, and she's just beautiful. She's, yeah. She's good shit. Yeah. Okay. So back, back to this girl, which by the way, we love a resilient queen and she is resilient. I know.
Starting point is 00:20:18 So I moved on like nothing, just wiped the, wiped the crumbs off my shoulder and just moved on. And two months ago, she shared a picture of herself and her new boyfriend who to my shock turned out to be my biological father. What are the chances? I literally, I thought my life was weird, but like, what is it? How? I don't know where you go from there.
Starting point is 00:20:45 Well, like what are the chances also small town? Do they say where they're from? Mm-mm. Okay. But let's just like, she doesn't say how old her mom is, but if she's 24, let's say her mom was even like 24, 24, her mom's 50. She's 27, dating a 50 year old. I've seen weirder things.
Starting point is 00:21:05 Yeah. I guess there's, there's, there's worse. There's an age gap, but I've seen weirder. Yeah. I mean, George Clooney movies really got to it. They really, yeah. I bet it's something. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:16 Okay. I debated what to do for a couple of days, then ultimately decided she needed the truth and told her my sister did not take it well and dumped him, but she wasn't angry with me. Oh, okay. She was her supportive. We love her. Yes.
Starting point is 00:21:33 Which also, how could you be mad at your sister? Like, yeah, true. I mean, okay, I don't think you'd be mad at your sister because you know your sister didn't do anything wrong, but it's almost like when someone tells you, it's like shooting the messenger. When someone gives you bad news, it's just automatic. It happens. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:49 It happens. But at least she was composed and did it. So we love that. I'm, I'm very happy for her because imagine like, yeah, your sister turns on you a knife to deal with the grief of your fucking father, robbing the cradle, who's also your sister. Now your sister's mad at you. Or what if they ended up getting married because you didn't say anything and then your sister now becomes your mom?
Starting point is 00:22:07 Oh, oh my God. Yeah. Your sister becomes your like mom. It's like, well, yeah, because it's technically your biological dad. So it's like, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. Yeah. So thank God she told her. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:20 Yeah. Thank God. Honestly, by now she's kind of amused. Once she banged my dad, she's my mom and has extra powers to blast me around now. She's being like nice about it. I know. We love that. Good sport.
Starting point is 00:22:32 Good sport. Also it's so weird. She's Eskimo sisters with her mom. Your sister. Wait. Her sister is Eskimo sister. No. I'd rather pass away.
Starting point is 00:22:45 I would rather pass away. Can you imagine? No, no. And I'm not even going to go there. No. Oh my God. No. Imagine having sex with anyone my mom has had sex with.
Starting point is 00:22:55 No, no, no. I want to throw up. I want to throw up so hard. Okay. Love my mother. She's actually a very attractive woman and I'm sure a lot of guys my age would be very happy to be with my mom. But what if you are Eskimo sisters with your mom?
Starting point is 00:23:07 Unlikely. But I know 1X in particular that I get to totally see hooking up with your mom. Oh, I know 1X in particular. Actually, I feel like we're thinking of different Xs and that means there's two Xs that we can see together with my mom. I'm thinking when that starts with a B. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:23 100%. Actually, speaking of which, yeah, no, for sure. I could see him hooking up with your mom. For sure. Actually, the more I think about it, I'm going to start to get angry because it actually seems more real. It's plausible. He has no boundaries.
Starting point is 00:23:35 None. Zero. Zero boundaries. So she goes on to say, my mom, on the other hand, is furious. She says I divulged something that wasn't my secret to share. What? Wait, hold on. Who got mad at her?
Starting point is 00:23:50 Because she shared a secret that wasn't hers. First of all, how's that a fucking secret? I don't think anyone else knows. But the relationship should have, like, secret or not. Like, that relationship was weird. Also, how, like, how is it not your secret to share when you're literally- It's my fucking father. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:10 You're literally the product of that. So it's like, that's you. That's your life. Like, it's 100% yours to share. Yeah. It's 100%. My life, this is, first of all, secret? Like, it's not a secret.
Starting point is 00:24:24 It's just- It's an unfortunate coincidence at best. Yeah. Well, I don't think the sister knew that she- Yeah, but secret makes it sound like, oh god, we all know that she's dating Ba-da-da-da's dad. Let's keep it on the deal. It's a secret.
Starting point is 00:24:41 That sounds like it's, like, collusion. Yeah. You know? That's like, I don't know what the mom was expecting. Like, maybe the mom was expecting her, like, relationship to not work out, but at the same time, it's like, what if it did? And on the off chance, you now have to have your baby daddy that you had an affair with now be a permanent member of your family.
Starting point is 00:25:01 Yeah. No, this girl's had nothing wrong. No, absolutely not. She did a service, if anything. Truly. Yeah. So she goes, that since my bio-father isn't related to my sister, it didn't matter if he dated my sister.
Starting point is 00:25:12 And it wasn't like they were talking marriage anyways. It's been two months and she's still angry, still snide, calls me a traitor, and finds excuses to make loud comments about how I can't be trusted with anything private or important. This is the mom. Yeah. Sounds a little emotionally manipulative. Very, very toxic mother. That's, that's really, that's, that's shitty.
Starting point is 00:25:38 So unfair of your daughter too. Like, you're the one that made the mistake 24 years ago, 25 years ago. Like that's on you. And if you're still unhappy about what you did, like that's something you should come to terms with. Yeah. That's not her fault. I don't know why the mom has so much skin in the game here.
Starting point is 00:25:56 Like did, did you like get joy out of watching one of your daughters? Fuck your baby daddy. Fuck your baby daddy. Like I'm super lost here. I know. You should be like, God, thank you so much. I was so fucking weird. I'm so happy you like dispelled this relationship.
Starting point is 00:26:10 Like that's really weird. The mom. It's so strange. She seems like emotionally manipulative. Definitely, definitely very manipulative here. And like, again, like, okay, they weren't talking marriage anyways, but like, can you imagine if they would have dated for two years and were talking marriage? And then it became a problem where you're like, Oh, well, actually you're dating my
Starting point is 00:26:30 biological father. And she's like, you've waited two years to tell me. Yep. It's like damned if you do damned if you don't. Yeah. And they're like, wait, you knew this whole time and didn't say anything. Exactly. You bitch.
Starting point is 00:26:41 Then the sister would have reason to be mad. Yeah. So it's like, pick your poison here. Do you want mom mad at you or do you want sister mad at you? Sister actually kind of has a legit reason. Like if you knew this and sat on it for two years, I can see why the sister would be mad. But your mom is being very selfish for, I don't really know why. Like I'm not sure how she benefits from this, but weird.
Starting point is 00:27:00 She's not wrong. Super strange. I think she just probably feels super guilty and didn't want her other daughter to look at her in a certain light, which I understand like what she did. Like she probably sells a lot of guilt over. Yeah. It's probably something that has like haunted her in a sense, but at the same time it's like, shouldn't you want that person gone then so that they aren't a reminder.
Starting point is 00:27:19 Yes. Of the haunting. Exactly. Like you shouldn't want that person to continue to be in your life, but also it's not then your daughter's burden to bear. Exactly. Exactly. You clean up your mess.
Starting point is 00:27:31 Yeah. It's weird. Yeah. Not wrong. So overall vote on the post was not the asshole. Yeah. Not the asshole. Not at all.
Starting point is 00:27:39 All day long. Rightfully so that you told your sister. No. Yeah. I would do the same thing. No. The thought of my sons growing up without me inspired me to quit smoking. I talked to my doctors and then I threw away all my cigarettes, ashtrays and lighters.
Starting point is 00:27:53 I started exercising instead of smoking. Staying away from alcohol when I was first quitting was key. I kept on trying, learned something each time. Do whatever it takes. No matter how many times it takes. We did it. So can you. For free and confidential help, call 1-800-QUIT-NOW or visit www.waytoquit.org developed by CDC.
Starting point is 00:28:15 I don't think I'm going to do this one, but my boyfriend cheated on me while I was undergoing treatment for cancer. I'm not emotionally stable enough for that one. Okay, we'll move along. I mean, we can if you think it'll be good. It just seems like a Debbie Downer. Yeah. Her update though.
Starting point is 00:28:37 Thanks guys for the well wishes. I hope to survive this illness and move past this chapter of my life. Oh my God. Nope. I'm already not well. She dumped him. Okay, good. Bravo.
Starting point is 00:28:47 If anyone wants the link, let me know. Thank God. But like, I'm so sorry for that. I'm so sorry. That's really sad because cheating really, it causes so much stress. And like for me, I've been cheated on. And what sucks about cheating is it really shatters your trust in like people. Oh, for sure.
Starting point is 00:29:06 It's not like you get cheated on and you just hold it against that one person and you just are like, oh, you view everyone as like, well, if this person can lie to me, what about this person and this person and this person? And it's not good for you to just like doubt people like that. It's unhealthy. It's like a weight. You're on edge. You're just on edge.
Starting point is 00:29:26 Like humans in general. Like when I was lied to or cheated on, it was like fucking open season. I'm like, which one of you bitches is also lying to me. You know what I mean? You just kind of turn on people for better or for worse. So I can't imagine you're going through chemo. You're sick. You're already like under low energy.
Starting point is 00:29:46 You need all the support you can get. You need the support you can get. And it's like, okay. Well, even if he was like, oh, I was scared. I was going to lose you. Which probably was what he said, but like you shouldn't like look at what this person is going through. You shouldn't then use your own, you know, emotions or lack of, you know, yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:06 That's fucked up. Composure to then like twist it on her. Like, oh, it's her fault that you cheated because she has cancer. Right. Yeah. No. No. Moving along.
Starting point is 00:30:18 If I go to my younger daughter's wedding, my younger daughter, Hailey, 28 female is marrying my older daughter, Jennifer, 30 females ex-fiance. You really wanted to hit me where it hurts, didn't you? I respect that. Okay. So I literally had no idea. I still don't have any idea what you're talking about. Really?
Starting point is 00:30:48 No idea. The concept is someone marrying someone else's ex that they're close to. These people are sisters. Sisters. Friends. Close friends. Tomato, tomato. Okay.
Starting point is 00:31:01 So they're sisters. This is worse, of course. Is there more? Yes. Okay. Jennifer is mad at me because I'm going to Hailey's wedding. She says that I'm quote condoning her sister's behavior as always, but that's simply not true. When the wedding was called off and we found out it was because Sam...
Starting point is 00:31:18 Who's Sam? Sam is... The younger one? So Jennifer's the older daughter. And Sam's the young one. Hailey is the younger daughter. Who's Sam? Sam is Jennifer's ex-fiance.
Starting point is 00:31:27 That's the man. That's the man. This is all about. This is the man. Yes. Okay. So when the wedding was called off, we found it was because Sam and Hailey were dating. I called Hailey immediately.
Starting point is 00:31:39 Wait, so she was the reason that her... Are you fucking kidding me? The whole reason the wedding was called off? You know where I stand on this one. Are you fucking kidding me? Bad news bears. Bad. I called Hailey immediately and I asked her to rethink the relationship.
Starting point is 00:31:51 Not only for her sister's sake, but also because quote, if he could do it once, he could do it twice. Facts. And I didn't want her to get hurt. She reassured me that that wasn't the case. That they were meant for each other and had known this for a long time. So I left it at that. Cases. I spoke to Sam too.
Starting point is 00:32:10 He apologized for any hurt he may have caused. May have caused? Bitch, you blew that shit up. You just destroyed someone's life. A family. A family, literally. Speaking of throwing a grenade at a family. Sam was very capable of that.
Starting point is 00:32:24 You were engaged to this woman's sister. You guys were about to walk down the aisle and the only reason the wedding didn't happen was because they found out, she found out, that you were cheating on her with her sister. So heads would fucking roll. Oh my. Heads would roll. And I'm not even like I just said, all bets are off on my not revenge. I wouldn't have a sister anymore.
Starting point is 00:32:48 No. We should be done. No. I'm, this is like the most intense story we have had tonight. This one is bad. Because you're not seeing the parallels here. Like this one really hits home because it's like, it's put it, okay. The dad's in a tough position because he loves his daughters, Hailey.
Starting point is 00:33:06 Yeah. They're both your kids. Both your kids. You're going to love your kids at the end of the day. However, your daughter, the younger one was a Christen-ass hoe. You don't go after your sister's fiance. You are supporting a relationship that was bred out of infidelity, betrayal. And yes, you are, I think you are condoning that if you go to the wedding because that
Starting point is 00:33:27 wedding shouldn't be happening. No. It's inappropriate. I'm just speaking like I'm thinking about my family. My family wouldn't. They'd be like, fuck you. No. And as a younger sister, your older sister has engaged this guy.
Starting point is 00:33:41 Yeah. He loved her enough to propose. Yeah. Why do you then feel that you're more entitled to that person? And he loves me. He's different. He's changed. He would never do this to anyone else.
Starting point is 00:33:52 He would never do this to me. He quite literally did it to your sister, your blood. And he put you in that situation. Like if it was meant to be, like nothing should have happened before. Right. He should have, they should have called off the wedding. It wasn't like, oh, he was cheating on her. The fiance.
Starting point is 00:34:09 Well, Sam has some balls because the fact that he has, he can show his face to the family. This is all wrong. This is all wrong. Yeah. Like Hailey or whoever the young one is should not be, she should not be marrying him. No. Let alone her sister. No.
Starting point is 00:34:26 She fucked his sister, her sister. The sister, Jennifer has every reason to literally burn the world down. Oh yeah. It would be livid. If one of the friends, my friends was the reason that I didn't walk down the fucking aisle. I'd be a felon. Let's just put it that way. I'd be a felon.
Starting point is 00:34:43 And either of that are committed to an institution. I would be probably. Probably both. I'm going to be honest. Yes. A padded cell would be very nice for me after, after something like that. Plead insanity. And let alone.
Starting point is 00:34:55 Okay. Not only does your friend, it's your sister. How could you do that to your sister? Someone you love and care about. But maybe they never were close. Maybe there was always jealousy. And maybe I've heard of like, I mean, there's some people that like have never had a good relationship with their sibling.
Starting point is 00:35:11 And their sibling has always kind of terrorized them and. Yeah. Stolen something that was theirs. Yeah. No, I get that. Maybe they weren't the closest, but okay. Let's go back to the dad. The dad's writing this.
Starting point is 00:35:22 So it's the mom that's actually writing this. Oh, the mom is writing this. It's the mom that's writing this. So what is it? The dad has nothing to do with it. We'll get there. Oh, okay. Okay.
Starting point is 00:35:32 So Sam apologized for any hurt he may have caused, but said that it wouldn't be fair to marry Jennifer when deep in his heart, he knew that he was in love with Haley. They've officially been together for a little over a year now and they truly seem happy and in love. My husband is supporting Jennifer. He's disgusted with the whole situation and doesn't want anything to do with it. At one point he announced that he wouldn't be giving Sam his blessing or walking Haley down the aisle.
Starting point is 00:35:58 Retweet. Retweet. Yes. Dadio. As it should be. Yes. Also, I can't believe her mom. As a mom.
Starting point is 00:36:06 As a mother. Why would you want your daughter to marry someone like that? No. My mom gave Justin, my boyfriend, who is a saint so much shit when I first introduced them and she interrogated the poor guy and it's like, if I had another sibling close in age that this happened with, my mom would kill that sibling for me. Literally. Literally.
Starting point is 00:36:27 The sibling and the guy. Like, I just don't understand how like as a mom, you're letting your daughter marry the scum or supporting it. My mother would be, I want to call her and ask her what she'd think, but I'm pretty sure my mom's Latina. So you're in that culture. Dead. Dead.
Starting point is 00:36:44 Dead. Like no fucking chance. No. Not. Dead. No. I don't like what this household has become. This is the first Christmas we haven't spent together as a whole family.
Starting point is 00:36:55 I don't like the situation anymore than my husband or Jennifer do, but they don't understand that ignoring the reality of it doesn't make it go away. Yeah. I mean, that is true. Yeah. That is true. It is. Okay.
Starting point is 00:37:08 So I'm thinking about the situation that I was in and it's like, you can sweep it under the rug and just be like, this is fucked up, but I'll move on. But I also think like you don't have to, you don't have to subject yourself to that discomfort. So. No, you don't have to openly support it. No. So that's what they want to do. Then that's what they want to do.
Starting point is 00:37:24 But like you, your husband and your daughter, Jennifer, should have Christmas together. Like Hailey made her bed and have a different holiday with them. Yeah. If you feel so called to see them, but like, but also like what kind of, I mean, I, I'm not a mother, but if I was, I'm thinking about it like that is not the daughter that I want to raise. I'd be like, you know better than that. Like first of all, how could you do that?
Starting point is 00:37:48 Respect relationships, respect a union, but let alone respect your fucking family. Don't go after somebody that is taken, let alone by your sibling, your blood. That is not a daughter that I'd want to raise. And I'd be like, I love you. You'll always be my daughter, but I can't support you in this decision. I can't support you in this. You're on your own. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:07 And I think that's totally fair. Yeah. So she goes on to say, when my husband said that he wasn't walking Hailey down the aisle, she was devastated. Okay. Well, your sister was devastated when he fucked her over to Shea. I asked my husband if he was willing to risk his relationship with Hailey by not walking her down the aisle.
Starting point is 00:38:23 Jennifer accused me of trying to twist him to my side. I told Jennifer that it's not about sides. It's about learning how to forgive. Okay. It's been one, less than a year. Yeah. Like this was her life, her fiance. Forgive?
Starting point is 00:38:37 Forgive. First of all. Maybe in 20 years. Yeah. At best in this lifetime, maybe. But also, I think that like, I guess we haven't heard little hoe Hailey's side, but like, I think in order, in order to forgive, there has to be some type of like, I don't want to say remorse.
Starting point is 00:38:58 But like, like, Hailey has to be even apologized. There's no like, there hasn't been any making amends, no making it right. So why the fuck should I forgive you what so I can sleep better at night? No, I actually sleep better at night. Like a baby back bitch, knowing that I did nothing wrong and you did everything wrong. It's definitely like, not okay. And it, okay. Forgive.
Starting point is 00:39:21 Yeah. But like, it's been less than a year. Like you're actively promoting her relationship then. Yeah. I've told her that it's been over a year now since her and Sam broke up and she's been bitterly jumping from relationship to relationship because she's so focused on Hailey and Sam and that if she never learns to forgive them, she'll never be at peace. I mean, there might be some truth to that.
Starting point is 00:39:42 But to tell your hurt daughter, like, oh, you're jumping from relationship to relationship. Like my mom told me that there would be a war. I know, but like, don't hurt your daughter. That's already hurting. Like, don't kick her when she's down. Yeah. Like, what are you implying? Well, okay.
Starting point is 00:40:01 Like, I don't think she's calling her a slut, but like, okay, my mother first of all has no filter. So my mom would absolutely be like, I'll hunt her real the fuck in, but I mean, I think as a mom, you want the best for your daughter. And if you have a great relationship with her, then you're going to be brutally honest with her. And if you see her jumping from relationship to relationship to fill a void, then you're going to tell her.
Starting point is 00:40:19 I'm like, Hey, listen, you're like doing the most. Yeah. And I need you to. I just think there's a better way to say it. Yeah. Like you're jumping from relationship to relationship. I mean, how much better to get like that than that? You know, Jennifer, I love you.
Starting point is 00:40:33 I'm so sorry this happened to you. Your sister, Hailey's a bitch. But your sister, Hailey's a trifle in us, hope, but, you know, I want you to find someone that truly does love you in a spec for real. Yeah. I think that's part of the conversation too, but I think it is worth pointing out. Like you are jumping from relationship to relationship because you're trying to fill a void.
Starting point is 00:40:52 Yeah. And the void can be filled because the reality is Mr. Perfect could walk into your life, but the fact is you're not going to accept that because you're so hurt over what your sister and ex-fiance did to you and rightfully so, but the only way to hash this out is to deal with it head on. And that doesn't mean she needs to forgive her or him right now, but I think one day she doesn't need to forgive them, right? She goes on to say, she says that I don't understand that Hailey purposefully stole
Starting point is 00:41:22 Sam from her and that she's been doing this since they were kids and I never noticed. I told her that she should have told me then. Okay. Mom, it's your job as a mom to notice how your kids are doing. Yeah, I agree. She said that I should have been paying closer attention and noticed it. I told her that she had to learn to let go of certain things in the past in order to move forward and that if Hailey did steal Sam as she claimed, then Hailey did her favor,
Starting point is 00:41:50 which okay, so then more reason not to fucking support your second daughter dating this monster. Yeah. She didn't want to hear that, but it needed to be said. I also offered to put in a three-way call with Hailey, but she declined. It's mom is nuts. Yeah. Whoa. Then she gave me an ultimatum.
Starting point is 00:42:07 She said, if I go to the wedding, it means Hailey was my favorite child all along and that she'll never speak to me again. I told her that I'm going to the wedding just as I would have gone to hers if she was in that situation. She said, okay, and hung up later. My husband calls me from work telling me she called him crying. That's a lot, but I stand firm. I think that supporting this daughter, like, yes, you should.
Starting point is 00:42:29 Maybe it's because I grew up with a very strict mother who would not let me be a piece of shit. My mom would not let me act like this. Yeah, my mom would be like, I love you, but I'm going to love you from a distance because I don't know who you are and I did not raise you to be this homewrecker. Yes, absolutely. And I'm not going to, me attending your wedding and letting you just get my unscathed is not being a good parent.
Starting point is 00:42:50 It's not fair. No, it's not fair to you. It's not fair to your sister because it's telling her, feel free to fuck over your sister and anyone for that matter and no repercussions. No. Absolutely unfair. Yeah. Like, it's so, so, so terrible.
Starting point is 00:43:05 No, I think, I stand with the dad. Yeah. I think this is fucked up. The overall vote of this post was that she was the asshole. That who's the asshole? The mom. Oh yeah. Which is the one writing this.
Starting point is 00:43:18 Yeah. So yes. Fuck you. Totally justified. Rightfully so. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:26 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:34 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:42 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:50 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:58 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:06 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:14 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:44:23 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:31 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No. Yeah. No.
Starting point is 00:44:39 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:47 Yeah. Yeah. the like police or the law, like to drop the ticket, to dismiss the ticket because it was a mistake and you're cognizant of the laws and whatever. But then you continue to fucking speed or you continue to run the red lights. You think the fucking police department's gonna look
Starting point is 00:45:02 at you and go like, yeah, okay, all right, we forgive you. No, you have to show that you've learned from your mistakes. Yeah, gotta go to traffic school. Exactly, or pay a thousand dollar ticket, whatever you feel like. I think the other one that this person replies to in their comment, she goes, it was the point where the mom said,
Starting point is 00:45:19 I've told her that it's been over a year since her and Sam broke up. And she's been bitterly jumping from relationship to relationship. The person comments, wow, low blow. You think that after a year, after her fiance fucked her sister, she should be in a solid relationship already?
Starting point is 00:45:34 Right. Like, yeah. Yeah, no, I agree. And again, kind of right on. She says that I don't understand that Hailey purposefully stole Sam from her and that she's been doing stuff like this since they were kids.
Starting point is 00:45:45 Person goes, it's not your child's responsibility to call things to your attention. When you are neglectful, it's your job as a parent to notice. Yeah, yeah, especially when they're younger, you're supposed to be cognizant of like your kids' interactions. Yeah, last one, mom saying,
Starting point is 00:46:00 if Hailey did steal Sam, as she claimed, but the person goes, what other explanation is there exactly? Quote, as she claimed, literally, no one is denying it. Right, like that's the thing is like, Sam didn't just like trip and stumble into Hailey's lap. Like, no. He was in a full-blown engagement.
Starting point is 00:46:18 Hailey did something to pique his interest. Right. And fostered it, because it takes two to tango. It does take two to tango. So it could have been on Sam. You know, maybe Sam initiated it. Maybe it was just Hailey. And then he like turned his head towards her,
Starting point is 00:46:34 like whatever it is. But at the end of the day, like, if it was Sam, Hailey shouldn't have pursued him. And if it was Hailey, Sam fucked over the sister he was supposed to marry. But you know what it comes down to in this whole grand scheme of things? Sam is clearly not a good person.
Starting point is 00:46:49 Oh, not at all. And whether it's Hailey, Jennifer, or your other daughter, neither, none of your daughter should be marrying him. No. You know, like. No. And like the mom saying like, oh, well, you know, Hailey did you a favor.
Starting point is 00:47:03 Okay. Rightfully so. Yeah. But it doesn't matter that Hailey's still not right. Right. And you shouldn't support, you know, one daughter destroying the other's life. Like.
Starting point is 00:47:14 No. It's kind of insane to me that this is even a question. Like. And I'm sure when you're in the thick of it, you're like conflicted because you're a parent and you're supposed to love and support all of your kids, no matter what they do. But that is crossing a lot of lines.
Starting point is 00:47:26 Oh yeah. I mean, I just think if you truly want to be a good parent to them, you need to show them and set boundaries that you can't do that to your blood. You can't. And at the end of the day, like, yes, that other daughter is going to be hurt and upset, but like she has no one to blame but herself.
Starting point is 00:47:42 Right. Like, sure. It's kind of like, if you want to be with Sam so fucking bad, we're not going to stop you. Go ahead. Go be with Sam. But we're not going to sit around and sing Kumbaya. And actively hurt the one.
Starting point is 00:47:53 No. We stopped to support the other daughter that you hurt and rightfully so we're supporting her. And go have your fun life with Sam. I hope he was worth it. Yeah. Like. Oof.
Starting point is 00:48:03 Yeah. Oof to that one. Yeah. Big oof. Oof. Well, that's all I have for you. And your initiation into two hot takes. This cheaters episode.
Starting point is 00:48:14 Love that for me. Great, Fran. I'll be back for stalkers. Yes, seriously. Well, thanks you guys for joining us for another episode of Two Hot Takes. If you have any cheaters stories or need any advice on cheaters, send them my way.
Starting point is 00:48:30 This is actually a topic that I am a content expert on. Yeah. So send it my way. Or weigh in on the stories. Let us know if you think, if you think this family is, is wrong. Yes, like connect on Instagram, TikTok, like let us know what you think about these stories,
Starting point is 00:48:51 especially the last one with poor Jennifer. Yeah, if you're Hailey, fuck you. Until next time. See ya, bye. The thought of my sons growing up without me inspired me to quit smoking. I talked to my doctors and then I threw away all my cigarettes, ashtrays, and lighters.
Starting point is 00:49:34 I started exercising instead of smoking. Staying away from alcohol when I was first quitting was key. I kept on trying, learned something each time. Do whatever it takes. No matter how many times it takes. We did it, so can you. For free and confidential help, call 1-800-QUIT-NOW or visit WayToQuit.org, developed by CDC.
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