Two Hot Takes - 6: Cheating or Nah? Hard to Tell With Gaslighting
Episode Date: March 18, 2021Two Hot Takes host, Morgan, is joined by one of her best friends and guest co-host, Alejandra Nagel. Episode includes blind reactions to Reddit stories about some of the most interning potential cheat...ers and confirmed cheater stories! Stories include a girl whose boyfriend is sharing lube with a friend, a girl whose sister was dating her biological father, and a mother who is tied up in a family war due to one daughter cheating with the other daughter's fiancé. Show your support (much appreciated): https://www.patreon.com/TwoHotTakes Full length Video episodes available on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/TwoHotTakes
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Are you ready to go today?
Yeah, let's fucking do it.
Let's drop up.
I told you the topics that I was thinking about pitching to you,
and I said cheaters, and you jumped.
I jumped, I stretched.
I was like, I've been waiting fucking years for this.
Put me in the game, coach.
I've been warming up, and I am fucking ready to talk some truth.
Oh, my gosh.
Today, you guys, you have the pleasure
of having one of my best friends, Miss Alejandra Nagel.
Hey, guys.
Join on this episode of Two Hot Takes.
Alejandra and I have been friends since, like,
I don't know, 2014, something, six years.
2014, 2015.
It's been a minute.
We've been through some good times.
Yeah, some rough times.
Yelling at each other in Ubers, but...
Oh, shit.
Loving each other at the end of the day.
Exactly.
We're still here.
Still here, still here.
Good times, too.
God, this girl, we just celebrated my 27th birthday,
but I think it was my 23rd.
She got me on stage at this pre-Coachella concert,
and Snoop Dogg was the headliner.
It was actually a pretty big deal.
She scoped us some tickets from the owner
of the Indiopolo Ground,
and literally, like, got us on stage,
and I was, like, three feet away from Snoop Dogg,
like, in the back alley.
Like, it was insane.
We've been through it.
We've been through it.
We've been through it.
But way more good times.
So, when I met Morgan, it was at We Fast,
and if you are from Minnesota,
then you know what the fuck We Fast is,
and if you're not from Minnesota, then Google it.
We Fast is, like, the country festival.
It's, like, it's, like, stagecoach,
but, like, it's like the Walmart of stagecoach.
But I think it's 10 times more fun.
It's crazy.
It's, like, insane.
It's a shit show in the best way.
Maybe we should go back.
Just say when.
Post-COVID.
Let's do it.
I will fucking go back.
Let's go.
But it is a humbling experience,
and when I met Morgan,
Morgan had the luxury of staying in a camper,
and I was in a fucking tent, like, a peasant.
And I was introduced to Morgan.
That's actually the first time we met.
I don't know if you know that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
No, I remember.
Like, the very first time.
My camper slash truck was, like, the charging port.
That's 100% accurate.
For, like, everyone.
Everyone used to, like, come to my truck
and, like, charge their phones.
Yeah.
Because at We Fast, like I said,
a humbling experience, no electricity,
you don't have an outlet.
No.
So I was like, I have to charge my phone.
So somehow I get connected to Morgan
in her fucking palace, which is a camper.
It was not a palace, you guys.
It was a palace.
Like, someone shit in my camper's toilet,
which you weren't supposed to do.
So the next couple days of this music festival,
we had to deal with, like, a fucking just shit storm
in our toilet.
And that's probably the least of the worries,
because to me, that's how bad We Fast is.
But We Fast is terrible.
Like, people flipped over the porta-potties
while you were in there.
Oh, my God, I forgot.
I forgot.
Yeah, maybe we don't want to go back.
Well, anyway, I meet Morgan.
Morgan is pitching a horse trailer.
Or she's pitching a truck to a camper.
Yeah.
She's pitching a truck to a camper,
which Morgan is five, three?
Five, two.
And a half?
Five, two.
Okay.
On a good day.
And she's wearing, like, her wedges.
And she's pitching a trailer to a camper.
And I'm, like...
That's a little scrappy one.
This bitch.
I don't even know her, but I fuck with her.
And so here we are.
Here we are.
God.
I was, like, seven, eight years ago now.
Oh, God.
That was early.
That was, like, 2013.
Yeah, for sure.
So, yeah, we are.
We're almost eight years.
Almost eight years.
Look at us.
Happy eight years.
But we're here to talk cheaters and all the things.
So buckle the fuck up.
Yeah.
Buckle the fuck up.
Our personal experience is about to just pop this topic off.
We've been hurt once or twice, and it shows.
Yeah.
But we're better, not bitter.
Exactly.
We tweet.
I remember that being one of my Instagram captions after a bad breakup.
I probably tweeted that, like, more than once.
If you follow me on Instagram, I'm sure it's still there.
Gonna bury that when I get home.
Archive it.
Okay, but let's dive in.
All right, let's do it.
Let's talk cheaters.
Back to the cheaters.
Back to the cheaters.
My boyfriend shares our lube with his best friend.
Why?
I don't, I don't know because lube is not expensive.
No.
At all.
You can even go and buy my go-to favorite coconut oil for, like, eight bucks.
You get a big jar, and it can last you a year, depending on how much you like.
It's dual use.
You can cook with it.
Exactly.
There's a lot of things.
It's the best about the world.
It really is.
So the fact that you're sharing lube with someone, just right off the bat.
Why?
Why?
Like, you don't know where your friend is.
Do we have ages?
Where he's been.
We do have ages.
Okay, let's figure it out.
So today, I, 25 female, was looking for my boyfriend's 27 males headphones.
I looked in his backpack and found the bottle of lube that we use.
When I asked him about it, he lied and said that it's in there because he was picking
things up from our living room and put it in there.
After pressuring him some more, because the lube was in a pocket all by itself, he finally
admitted that it was in there because he took it to his best friend, but forgot to give
it to him.
So.
Change in his story real fast.
So not only are you sharing lube, but you're actually acting as like door dashers for each
other and you're bringing it to each other?
Yeah.
Like, Hey, Morgan, um, I need the lube tonight.
Little fishy.
Like why?
Why?
I would be more convenient for the friend to just run to a CVS, Walgreens, Rite Aid.
Yeah.
They're on every corner.
Yes.
7-11 has lube.
Yes.
Yeah.
Whoa.
Every gas station has lube.
Okay.
So she, I, this one's just really weird for a lot of reasons because even if he's cheating,
like, first of all, why does he have a backpack?
Second of all.
At 27.
Second of all, like he's, he's like loading up his backpack and like he's putting lube
in the backpack to go cheat on her.
That seems so like, I don't, I don't know.
Like maybe she'll get to it, but I just don't understand why you would ever share something
that's so cheap with your friend and like a sexual thing.
Like that's like, I don't want to say it's like sharing a condom, but kind of is like,
it's a sexual thing or like sharing a sex toy.
Like, yeah, yeah.
It's like, you're using that with your partner.
Who knows who your friend's sleeping with?
Like, granted, you probably do know, but like, where's that person been?
It's the convenience for me.
Like, yeah.
Like they're making it harder than it needs to be making it so much harder than it needs
to be.
Yeah.
Like cause most of the times, not most, but like an impromptu fuck at two in the morning,
you're telling me that you'd rather text your buddy to bring you your shared bottle
of lube instead of just running to CVS, door dashing CVS, whatever.
Yeah.
Getting lube.
It reminds me of McLovin from Superman.
Oh my God.
Like, why would you share lube?
That just.
It doesn't make any sense.
If he's not cheating, we've got other issues.
We've got other problems because I just, the sharing of lube is enough.
Yeah.
No, I think the fact that he's changing his story real fast though, like definitely
cheating.
Oh, um, I put it in my backpack because I was cleaning the living room.
Why was the lube in the living room?
Did you guys fuck there?
If so, okay.
Maybe it adds up then.
Yeah.
But otherwise, not so much.
But poop.
Like you're cleaning up, you put it in your backpack.
What for?
No, you just walk it back to your bedside drawer or wherever you keep it.
Yeah.
Why would you just put it in your backpack?
Yeah.
I don't clean up my room and like, be like, oh, let me put this like sex toy in my purse.
Yeah.
No.
Fishy.
Fishy.
My next sex adventure.
That's for what?
Yeah.
So she goes on to say he lied because I've gotten upset at the first time over a year
ago that he gave his friend lube.
Okay.
Girl.
Girl, girl, girl.
So.
All right.
Just keep it coming.
I didn't really get upset.
I was just confused and weirded out that they share lube.
Yes.
Yeah.
Rightfully so.
Thank God you see the light.
It's weird.
This is not normal.
Like don't share lube with your friends.
It's super weird.
Yeah.
It's just like.
At 25 and 27.
It's not expensive.
Like I just, there's something off here.
Yeah.
My first thought was that they were using it together.
Oh.
Oh.
I didn't think about that one.
Like a threesome.
Or he's just cheating with his friend.
Like he's gay.
Yeah.
That would be such a plot twist.
That would be.
This time, apparently his friend, his friend's girlfriend and my boyfriend were having a
convo about anal sex and he suggested that they try our lube and apparently he wasn't
going to let them keep it because it's too expensive.
I'm so confused, grossed out and weirded out.
I don't know whether to believe him.
I can't help but think that he took the lube to use it with someone else.
Yeah.
No, I'm, I think he totally took it to use it with someone else.
Like no matter how expensive the lube is, like if, especially if they're doing anal
sex, like what are you going to do?
Let them squeeze the lube out on their hands.
Use it.
Rub it all over her butt.
Like his dick that's going in her butt.
Like E. coli one.
Yeah.
First of all, we're in a pan.
Yeah.
And then what if they need more?
Like you're letting her let poop hands then touch your expensive lube again.
Okay.
So she said it's expensive.
Did I, did I hear that right?
Yeah.
Okay.
So why, first of all, if I'm her, I'm Googling this lube.
I'm figuring out just how fucking expensive because if anything less than a hundred fucking
dollars and it's not laced with gold, then I don't understand what the deal is.
Yeah.
Honestly, if I give you my lube and you use it, I don't want it back.
It's yours.
No.
Happy birthday.
I don't need that.
Exactly.
But if you really want your friend to try this, order him some for a present.
If it's expensive and you're worried about it, just say, no man, you get your own lube.
Try this.
It's going to be great.
What?
You'll love it.
No.
It's tried and tested.
I've never heard of anyone like this.
Lube is so incredible and it's so expensive that I need you to just borrow it.
No.
No.
I do have like, so when I was trying to turn everyone on to the coconut oil.
Yeah.
I remember that.
We were out one night in Manhattan Beach.
I remember that.
Oh my God.
When you said that, I flashed back to that bar, I couldn't tell you the name in Manhattan
Beach.
We're like in a booth.
Yeah.
Yes.
I don't even remember who we were with, but you could probably refresh that.
Yeah.
It was like me, you, Sarah and Lauren.
Sure.
But guy wise, we were with guy.
Oh, that guy.
Okay.
Not my bride.
No.
No.
Other one.
So we like went back to his place because we were all like super hungry and they just
made chili or something.
So we like went back to his place to get chili.
Really?
Really?
That is not ringing.
Yeah.
That is a brand that not ringing you, bro.
And so we're like, we're like going back to get this chili and like it was a shore
walk because Manhattan Beach, California is there like beach town, small, you can walk,
tell the bars, whatever.
And so.
Pretty panty.
I was like talking to Sarah and I was like, yeah, like, oh, like if you hook up with that
guy later, like blah, blah, blah, like if I hook up with someone later, like I'm going
to use coconut oil.
And she's like, coconut oil?
What?
And I was like, yeah, no, like try it.
It's amazing.
She's like, I'm good.
So I literally go and grab coconut oil out of his kitchen cupboard.
Yeah.
And I like start slathering it on Sarah's arm.
Can I revise the story though, because for some reason I thought you did this at the
bar.
No.
Really?
No, this was Adam.
At his house.
At his house.
Hmm.
Okay.
Go on.
Yeah.
But I don't even know if you came with to get chili.
That's where I think you lost me.
I think we went.
And I think I stayed behind.
Really quick to get chili.
And then I think we went back to the bar.
I think you did.
Like it was just like a quick little snack.
Really run.
Yeah.
Nothing to see here.
We were like back.
And I think like me and Sarah walked in and we were just like, yes, I remember some weird
shit happening.
Like you guys left for whatever reason.
Chili.
For chili.
That's why I don't remember the chili.
I was like, I'm a chili fanatic and I think I would remember a chili.
Yeah.
It was beef though.
You're right.
I'm out.
I'm out.
Maybe that's why I stayed back.
I was like, nope.
I think it is.
You weren't interested in the, in the beef.
You lost me.
Yeah.
Um, okay.
Yes.
I do remember this night.
And you sold her on the idea.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And so it's like, I love the coconut oil, but I wouldn't give someone my bedside jar.
Yeah.
You would, if anything, go buy them a jar.
Yeah.
And a little bowl on it.
Here you go.
Want, really want you to try this.
I know you're not going to go buy it yourself.
Here's some coconut oil.
However, I understand this is an expensive lube and you don't want to just buy them a
bottle of it because they may not even like it, but really like how much is the most expensive
lube?
How good is this fucking lube?
Yeah.
I'm just so obsessed with lube.
Like just have good sex and you don't need it.
I'm going to, I'm going to disagree with that.
I'm going to disagree with that.
Because you love lube.
I, I think good lube heightens the experience one also you've had a few drinks and you're
a little dehydrated.
Yeah.
You don't got to wop some days.
Can't relate.
She's kidding.
You know, it just, I just, I don't know.
Old age has gone to me.
I don't know.
You're not old first of all.
I literally turned 27 two days ago and third.
Um, okay.
I'm not knocking lube.
I know.
I love my coconut.
You're an advocate.
Absolutely.
Love it.
I know that.
Love that.
See that.
Um, top, bottom.
I mean, use it.
Use it everywhere.
Maybe that's what I'm missing out on.
It's incredible.
So I'm not going to knock it, but I also think like the whole, the fact that this whole story
hinges on lube is really getting to me because it shouldn't be that serious.
No, he's definitely cheating.
You think?
I would, I would literally just like, I would ask, I would literally ask his friend and
be like, like awkwardly, like kind of catch them off guard where they're like all together.
Oh, you enjoy the lube, huh?
Yeah.
Like, Hey, did you ever, did you ever try that lube that we have?
And he's like, what are you talking about?
Yeah.
Then it's like liar.
I don't know.
But then there's just, maybe I've gotten in too deep with like very severe lies, but
like they can spend that later because then he can be like, Oh, he was just embarrassed.
He didn't want you to know we were sharing lube.
So there's way too many ways to lie out of it.
I honestly think if you're looking at this, like, I'm a pretty, I think I'm a rational
person.
If I look at this, are you, you're really going to break up with your boyfriend because
he shares lube with his friend and you happen to find it in his backpack.
And that was enough for you to jump to the conclusion that he's cheating.
I just think it's too weird.
I need more.
It's weird, weird flex.
Yes.
But I need more.
I don't know.
I think it's weird.
The top comment goes, it's normal that you think he's possibly cheated.
I'm a guy and my thoughts went there instantly as well because who the fuck shares lube.
And expensive total BS.
You can buy decent lube for like 20 bucks, sometimes even 10 for sure.
You get it next day.
Amazon delivery.
Yeah.
This is weird.
Yeah.
I'm glad we agree as a community that sharing lube sharing lube is just weird.
It's inappropriate.
I've never heard of it.
Yeah.
It's inappropriate.
We're in a pandemic in any, in any world you shouldn't be sharing lube, but especially
in this world today, absolutely not.
I mean, God, there's so many other things that I'm like, I just feel great.
Gross.
I just know what happens to my lube and it's just like, you know where your lube's been.
It just, to not go near anyone else, it really shouldn't.
It's also just like, you keep your shit in the bedroom.
Yeah.
I don't know that's, I don't know.
I don't know if he's actually was cheating, but there was something weird.
It's weird.
100%.
Weird.
100%.
Yeah.
Got to walk the dogs, school drop off, meetings from 10 to 3, take kids to soccer practice,
then there goes the extra time for a jog.
That's okay.
Maybe next week.
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This next one is Family Cheating, which the title is very interesting and I kind of relate
to it in the sense that if I tried to explain my family to anyone, I would need a Venn diagram.
Whatever those fucking tree family tree charts are, that's what I need to explain my family.
So the title is, Am I the Asshole for Telling My Sister She Was Dating My Biological Father?
Hold on.
Oh my God.
What?
I need time to process this.
My sister, they must have not been blood related, right?
I'm going to go if it's biodad.
I'm going to think it's kind of like my family where we all have the same mom, but different
dad.
Okay.
Okay.
She goes, so my life's turned into a bloody soap opera recently and I could use some outside
opinions here.
I, 24 female, and the product of my mom having an affair.
Fortunately, my dad decided to forgive my mom and keep me and I had a pretty good upbringing,
but I don't really look a lot like the rest of my family.
I'm the only redhead among other things.
And I did ask questions of why am I the only one with insert trait here?
What is this trait that we have to be so elusive?
Is it like too identifying or like, why won't she tell us?
Like, well, there's some like silly ones where like Widow's Peak is genetic, how you cross
your thumbs.
You're on Reddit and we're here.
Just tell us, just tell us, right?
When I was 17, my mom took me out for ice cream and introduced me to my bio father.
She said that she felt I was old enough to know the truth and explained about her affair.
Well, also, A, making me promise I wouldn't tell my older sister, 27 female in the present.
Okay.
So only a three-year age gap between the two of them.
Okay.
And B, hammering home along with my bio dad that he'd never be a part of my life and
didn't want me.
It was a lot.
I won't lie.
But I learned to suck it up and move on with my life fast forward to the present.
My big sister has always gravitated towards older men.
Same sis.
Same.
We like to joke that it's the result of too many George Clooney movies growing up.
Love George Clooney.
I know.
He's so cool.
You just love his wife.
I love his wife.
Damn it.
You caught me.
I was just thinking it's really fucking a mall that I'm getting off to.
Fucking badass.
World like human rights.
Human rights lawyer.
Yeah.
She works for the UN or something.
Yeah, she does.
That's my dream job.
So I'm like, oh, and she's just beautiful.
She's, yeah.
She's good shit.
Yeah.
Okay.
So back, back to this girl, which by the way, we love a resilient queen and she is resilient.
I know.
So I moved on like nothing, just wiped the, wiped the crumbs off my shoulder and just
moved on.
And two months ago, she shared a picture of herself and her new boyfriend who to my shock
turned out to be my biological father.
What are the chances?
I literally, I thought my life was weird, but like, what is it?
How?
I don't know where you go from there.
Well, like what are the chances also small town?
Do they say where they're from?
Mm-mm.
Okay.
But let's just like, she doesn't say how old her mom is, but if she's 24, let's say
her mom was even like 24, 24, her mom's 50.
She's 27, dating a 50 year old.
I've seen weirder things.
Yeah.
I guess there's, there's, there's worse.
There's an age gap, but I've seen weirder.
Yeah.
I mean, George Clooney movies really got to it.
They really, yeah.
I bet it's something.
Yeah.
Okay.
I debated what to do for a couple of days, then ultimately decided she needed the truth
and told her my sister did not take it well and dumped him, but she wasn't angry with
me.
Oh, okay.
She was her supportive.
We love her.
Yes.
Which also, how could you be mad at your sister?
Like, yeah, true.
I mean, okay, I don't think you'd be mad at your sister because you know your sister
didn't do anything wrong, but it's almost like when someone tells you, it's like shooting
the messenger.
When someone gives you bad news, it's just automatic.
It happens.
Yeah.
It happens.
But at least she was composed and did it.
So we love that.
I'm, I'm very happy for her because imagine like, yeah, your sister turns on you a knife
to deal with the grief of your fucking father, robbing the cradle, who's also your sister.
Now your sister's mad at you.
Or what if they ended up getting married because you didn't say anything and then your sister
now becomes your mom?
Oh, oh my God.
Yeah.
Your sister becomes your like mom.
It's like, well, yeah, because it's technically your biological dad.
So it's like, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.
Yeah.
So thank God she told her.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Thank God.
Honestly, by now she's kind of amused.
Once she banged my dad, she's my mom and has extra powers to blast me around now.
She's being like nice about it.
I know.
We love that.
Good sport.
Good sport.
Also it's so weird.
She's Eskimo sisters with her mom.
Your sister.
Wait.
Her sister is Eskimo sister.
No.
I'd rather pass away.
I would rather pass away.
Can you imagine?
No, no.
And I'm not even going to go there.
No.
Oh my God.
No.
Imagine having sex with anyone my mom has had sex with.
No, no, no.
I want to throw up.
I want to throw up so hard.
Okay.
Love my mother.
She's actually a very attractive woman and I'm sure a lot of guys my age would be very
happy to be with my mom.
But what if you are Eskimo sisters with your mom?
Unlikely.
But I know 1X in particular that I get to totally see hooking up with your mom.
Oh, I know 1X in particular.
Actually, I feel like we're thinking of different Xs and that means there's two Xs that we
can see together with my mom.
I'm thinking when that starts with a B.
Yeah.
Yeah.
100%.
Actually, speaking of which, yeah, no, for sure.
I could see him hooking up with your mom.
For sure.
Actually, the more I think about it, I'm going to start to get angry because it actually
seems more real.
It's plausible.
He has no boundaries.
None.
Zero.
Zero boundaries.
So she goes on to say, my mom, on the other hand, is furious.
She says I divulged something that wasn't my secret to share.
What?
Wait, hold on.
Who got mad at her?
Because she shared a secret that wasn't hers.
First of all, how's that a fucking secret?
I don't think anyone else knows.
But the relationship should have, like, secret or not.
Like, that relationship was weird.
Also, how, like, how is it not your secret to share when you're literally-
It's my fucking father.
Yeah.
You're literally the product of that.
So it's like, that's you.
That's your life.
Like, it's 100% yours to share.
Yeah.
It's 100%.
My life, this is, first of all, secret?
Like, it's not a secret.
It's just-
It's an unfortunate coincidence at best.
Yeah.
Well, I don't think the sister knew that she-
Yeah, but secret makes it sound like, oh god, we all know that she's dating Ba-da-da-da's
dad.
Let's keep it on the deal.
It's a secret.
That sounds like it's, like, collusion.
Yeah.
You know?
That's like, I don't know what the mom was expecting.
Like, maybe the mom was expecting her, like, relationship to not work out, but at the
same time, it's like, what if it did?
And on the off chance, you now have to have your baby daddy that you had an affair with
now be a permanent member of your family.
Yeah.
No, this girl's had nothing wrong.
No, absolutely not.
She did a service, if anything.
Truly.
Yeah.
So she goes, that since my bio-father isn't related to my sister, it didn't matter if
he dated my sister.
And it wasn't like they were talking marriage anyways.
It's been two months and she's still angry, still snide, calls me a traitor, and finds
excuses to make loud comments about how I can't be trusted with anything private or important.
This is the mom.
Yeah.
Sounds a little emotionally manipulative.
Very, very toxic mother.
That's, that's really, that's, that's shitty.
So unfair of your daughter too.
Like, you're the one that made the mistake 24 years ago, 25 years ago.
Like that's on you.
And if you're still unhappy about what you did, like that's something you should come
to terms with.
Yeah.
That's not her fault.
I don't know why the mom has so much skin in the game here.
Like did, did you like get joy out of watching one of your daughters?
Fuck your baby daddy.
Fuck your baby daddy.
Like I'm super lost here.
I know.
You should be like, God, thank you so much.
I was so fucking weird.
I'm so happy you like dispelled this relationship.
Like that's really weird.
The mom.
It's so strange.
She seems like emotionally manipulative.
Definitely, definitely very manipulative here.
And like, again, like, okay, they weren't talking marriage anyways, but like, can you
imagine if they would have dated for two years and were talking marriage?
And then it became a problem where you're like, Oh, well, actually you're dating my
biological father.
And she's like, you've waited two years to tell me.
Yep.
It's like damned if you do damned if you don't.
Yeah.
And they're like, wait, you knew this whole time and didn't say anything.
Exactly.
You bitch.
Then the sister would have reason to be mad.
Yeah.
So it's like, pick your poison here.
Do you want mom mad at you or do you want sister mad at you?
Sister actually kind of has a legit reason.
Like if you knew this and sat on it for two years, I can see why the sister would be mad.
But your mom is being very selfish for, I don't really know why.
Like I'm not sure how she benefits from this, but weird.
She's not wrong.
Super strange.
I think she just probably feels super guilty and didn't want her other daughter to look
at her in a certain light, which I understand like what she did.
Like she probably sells a lot of guilt over.
Yeah.
It's probably something that has like haunted her in a sense, but at the same time it's
like, shouldn't you want that person gone then so that they aren't a reminder.
Yes.
Of the haunting.
Exactly.
Like you shouldn't want that person to continue to be in your life, but also it's not then
your daughter's burden to bear.
Exactly.
Exactly.
You clean up your mess.
Yeah.
It's weird.
Yeah.
Not wrong.
So overall vote on the post was not the asshole.
Yeah.
Not the asshole.
Not at all.
All day long.
Rightfully so that you told your sister.
No.
Yeah.
I would do the same thing.
No.
The thought of my sons growing up without me inspired me to quit smoking.
I talked to my doctors and then I threw away all my cigarettes, ashtrays and lighters.
I started exercising instead of smoking.
Staying away from alcohol when I was first quitting was key.
I kept on trying, learned something each time.
Do whatever it takes.
No matter how many times it takes.
We did it.
So can you.
For free and confidential help, call 1-800-QUIT-NOW or visit www.waytoquit.org developed by CDC.
I don't think I'm going to do this one, but my boyfriend cheated on me while I was undergoing
treatment for cancer.
I'm not emotionally stable enough for that one.
Okay, we'll move along.
I mean, we can if you think it'll be good.
It just seems like a Debbie Downer.
Yeah.
Her update though.
Thanks guys for the well wishes.
I hope to survive this illness and move past this chapter of my life.
Oh my God.
Nope.
I'm already not well.
She dumped him.
Okay, good.
Bravo.
If anyone wants the link, let me know.
Thank God.
But like, I'm so sorry for that.
I'm so sorry.
That's really sad because cheating really, it causes so much stress.
And like for me, I've been cheated on.
And what sucks about cheating is it really shatters your trust in like people.
Oh, for sure.
It's not like you get cheated on and you just hold it against that one person and you just
are like, oh, you view everyone as like, well, if this person can lie to me, what about this
person and this person and this person?
And it's not good for you to just like doubt people like that.
It's unhealthy.
It's like a weight.
You're on edge.
You're just on edge.
Like humans in general.
Like when I was lied to or cheated on, it was like fucking open season.
I'm like, which one of you bitches is also lying to me.
You know what I mean?
You just kind of turn on people for better or for worse.
So I can't imagine you're going through chemo.
You're sick.
You're already like under low energy.
You need all the support you can get.
You need the support you can get.
And it's like, okay.
Well, even if he was like, oh, I was scared.
I was going to lose you.
Which probably was what he said, but like you shouldn't like look at what this person is
going through.
You shouldn't then use your own, you know, emotions or lack of, you know, yeah.
That's fucked up.
Composure to then like twist it on her.
Like, oh, it's her fault that you cheated because she has cancer.
Right.
Yeah.
No.
No.
Moving along.
If I go to my younger daughter's wedding, my younger daughter, Hailey, 28 female is marrying
my older daughter, Jennifer, 30 females ex-fiance.
You really wanted to hit me where it hurts, didn't you?
I respect that.
Okay.
So I literally had no idea.
I still don't have any idea what you're talking about.
Really?
No idea.
The concept is someone marrying someone else's ex that they're close to.
These people are sisters.
Sisters.
Friends.
Close friends.
Tomato, tomato.
Okay.
So they're sisters.
This is worse, of course.
Is there more?
Yes.
Okay.
Jennifer is mad at me because I'm going to Hailey's wedding.
She says that I'm quote condoning her sister's behavior as always, but that's simply not true.
When the wedding was called off and we found out it was because Sam...
Who's Sam?
Sam is...
The younger one?
So Jennifer's the older daughter.
And Sam's the young one.
Hailey is the younger daughter.
Who's Sam?
Sam is Jennifer's ex-fiance.
That's the man.
That's the man.
This is all about.
This is the man.
Yes.
Okay.
So when the wedding was called off, we found it was because Sam and Hailey were dating.
I called Hailey immediately.
Wait, so she was the reason that her...
Are you fucking kidding me?
The whole reason the wedding was called off?
You know where I stand on this one.
Are you fucking kidding me?
Bad news bears.
Bad.
I called Hailey immediately and I asked her to rethink the relationship.
Not only for her sister's sake, but also because quote, if he could do it once, he could do it twice.
Facts.
And I didn't want her to get hurt.
She reassured me that that wasn't the case.
That they were meant for each other and had known this for a long time.
So I left it at that.
Cases.
I spoke to Sam too.
He apologized for any hurt he may have caused.
May have caused?
Bitch, you blew that shit up.
You just destroyed someone's life.
A family.
A family, literally.
Speaking of throwing a grenade at a family.
Sam was very capable of that.
You were engaged to this woman's sister.
You guys were about to walk down the aisle and the only reason the wedding didn't happen
was because they found out, she found out, that you were cheating on her with her sister.
So heads would fucking roll.
Oh my.
Heads would roll.
And I'm not even like I just said, all bets are off on my not revenge.
I wouldn't have a sister anymore.
No.
We should be done.
No.
I'm, this is like the most intense story we have had tonight.
This one is bad.
Because you're not seeing the parallels here.
Like this one really hits home because it's like, it's put it, okay.
The dad's in a tough position because he loves his daughters, Hailey.
Yeah.
They're both your kids.
Both your kids.
You're going to love your kids at the end of the day.
However, your daughter, the younger one was a Christen-ass hoe.
You don't go after your sister's fiance.
You are supporting a relationship that was bred out of infidelity, betrayal.
And yes, you are, I think you are condoning that if you go to the wedding because that
wedding shouldn't be happening.
No.
It's inappropriate.
I'm just speaking like I'm thinking about my family.
My family wouldn't.
They'd be like, fuck you.
No.
And as a younger sister, your older sister has engaged this guy.
Yeah.
He loved her enough to propose.
Yeah.
Why do you then feel that you're more entitled to that person?
And he loves me.
He's different.
He's changed.
He would never do this to anyone else.
He would never do this to me.
He quite literally did it to your sister, your blood.
And he put you in that situation.
Like if it was meant to be, like nothing should have happened before.
Right.
He should have, they should have called off the wedding.
It wasn't like, oh, he was cheating on her.
The fiance.
Well, Sam has some balls because the fact that he has, he can show his face to the family.
This is all wrong.
This is all wrong.
Yeah.
Like Hailey or whoever the young one is should not be, she should not be marrying him.
No.
Let alone her sister.
No.
She fucked his sister, her sister.
The sister, Jennifer has every reason to literally burn the world down.
Oh yeah.
It would be livid.
If one of the friends, my friends was the reason that I didn't walk down the fucking aisle.
I'd be a felon.
Let's just put it that way.
I'd be a felon.
And either of that are committed to an institution.
I would be probably.
Probably both.
I'm going to be honest.
Yes.
A padded cell would be very nice for me after, after something like that.
Plead insanity.
And let alone.
Okay.
Not only does your friend, it's your sister.
How could you do that to your sister?
Someone you love and care about.
But maybe they never were close.
Maybe there was always jealousy.
And maybe I've heard of like, I mean, there's some people that like have never had a good
relationship with their sibling.
And their sibling has always kind of terrorized them and.
Yeah.
Stolen something that was theirs.
Yeah.
No, I get that.
Maybe they weren't the closest, but okay.
Let's go back to the dad.
The dad's writing this.
So it's the mom that's actually writing this.
Oh, the mom is writing this.
It's the mom that's writing this.
So what is it?
The dad has nothing to do with it.
We'll get there.
Oh, okay.
Okay.
So Sam apologized for any hurt he may have caused, but said that it wouldn't be fair to
marry Jennifer when deep in his heart, he knew that he was in love with Haley.
They've officially been together for a little over a year now and they truly seem happy and
in love.
My husband is supporting Jennifer.
He's disgusted with the whole situation and doesn't want anything to do with it.
At one point he announced that he wouldn't be giving Sam his blessing or walking Haley
down the aisle.
Retweet.
Retweet.
Yes.
Dadio.
As it should be.
Yes.
Also, I can't believe her mom.
As a mom.
As a mother.
Why would you want your daughter to marry someone like that?
No.
My mom gave Justin, my boyfriend, who is a saint so much shit when I first introduced
them and she interrogated the poor guy and it's like, if I had another sibling close
in age that this happened with, my mom would kill that sibling for me.
Literally.
Literally.
The sibling and the guy.
Like, I just don't understand how like as a mom, you're letting your daughter marry
the scum or supporting it.
My mother would be, I want to call her and ask her what she'd think, but I'm pretty
sure my mom's Latina.
So you're in that culture.
Dead.
Dead.
Dead.
Like no fucking chance.
No.
Not.
Dead.
No.
I don't like what this household has become.
This is the first Christmas we haven't spent together as a whole family.
I don't like the situation anymore than my husband or Jennifer do, but they don't understand
that ignoring the reality of it doesn't make it go away.
Yeah.
I mean, that is true.
Yeah.
That is true.
It is.
Okay.
So I'm thinking about the situation that I was in and it's like, you can sweep it under
the rug and just be like, this is fucked up, but I'll move on.
But I also think like you don't have to, you don't have to subject yourself to that discomfort.
So.
No, you don't have to openly support it.
No.
So that's what they want to do.
Then that's what they want to do.
But like you, your husband and your daughter, Jennifer, should have Christmas together.
Like Hailey made her bed and have a different holiday with them.
Yeah.
If you feel so called to see them, but like, but also like what kind of, I mean, I, I'm
not a mother, but if I was, I'm thinking about it like that is not the daughter that I want
to raise.
I'd be like, you know better than that.
Like first of all, how could you do that?
Respect relationships, respect a union, but let alone respect your fucking family.
Don't go after somebody that is taken, let alone by your sibling, your blood.
That is not a daughter that I'd want to raise.
And I'd be like, I love you.
You'll always be my daughter, but I can't support you in this decision.
I can't support you in this.
You're on your own.
Yeah.
And I think that's totally fair.
Yeah.
So she goes on to say, when my husband said that he wasn't walking Hailey down the aisle,
she was devastated.
Okay.
Well, your sister was devastated when he fucked her over to Shea.
I asked my husband if he was willing to risk his relationship with Hailey by not walking
her down the aisle.
Jennifer accused me of trying to twist him to my side.
I told Jennifer that it's not about sides.
It's about learning how to forgive.
Okay.
It's been one, less than a year.
Yeah.
Like this was her life, her fiance.
Forgive?
Forgive.
First of all.
Maybe in 20 years.
Yeah.
At best in this lifetime, maybe.
But also, I think that like, I guess we haven't heard little hoe Hailey's side, but like,
I think in order, in order to forgive, there has to be some type of like, I don't want
to say remorse.
But like, like, Hailey has to be even apologized.
There's no like, there hasn't been any making amends, no making it right.
So why the fuck should I forgive you what so I can sleep better at night?
No, I actually sleep better at night.
Like a baby back bitch, knowing that I did nothing wrong and you did everything wrong.
It's definitely like, not okay.
And it, okay.
Forgive.
Yeah.
But like, it's been less than a year.
Like you're actively promoting her relationship then.
Yeah.
I've told her that it's been over a year now since her and Sam broke up and she's been
bitterly jumping from relationship to relationship because she's so focused on Hailey and Sam
and that if she never learns to forgive them, she'll never be at peace.
I mean, there might be some truth to that.
But to tell your hurt daughter, like, oh, you're jumping from relationship to relationship.
Like my mom told me that there would be a war.
I know, but like, don't hurt your daughter.
That's already hurting.
Like, don't kick her when she's down.
Yeah.
Like, what are you implying?
Well, okay.
Like, I don't think she's calling her a slut, but like, okay, my mother first of all has
no filter.
So my mom would absolutely be like, I'll hunt her real the fuck in, but I mean, I think
as a mom, you want the best for your daughter.
And if you have a great relationship with her, then you're going to be brutally honest
with her.
And if you see her jumping from relationship to relationship to fill a void, then you're
going to tell her.
I'm like, Hey, listen, you're like doing the most.
Yeah.
And I need you to.
I just think there's a better way to say it.
Yeah.
Like you're jumping from relationship to relationship.
I mean, how much better to get like that than that?
You know, Jennifer, I love you.
I'm so sorry this happened to you.
Your sister, Hailey's a bitch.
But your sister, Hailey's a trifle in us, hope, but, you know, I want you to find someone
that truly does love you in a spec for real.
Yeah.
I think that's part of the conversation too, but I think it is worth pointing out.
Like you are jumping from relationship to relationship because you're trying to fill
a void.
Yeah.
And the void can be filled because the reality is Mr. Perfect could walk into your life,
but the fact is you're not going to accept that because you're so hurt over what your
sister and ex-fiance did to you and rightfully so, but the only way to hash this out is to
deal with it head on.
And that doesn't mean she needs to forgive her or him right now, but I think one day
she doesn't need to forgive them, right?
She goes on to say, she says that I don't understand that Hailey purposefully stole
Sam from her and that she's been doing this since they were kids and I never noticed.
I told her that she should have told me then.
Okay.
Mom, it's your job as a mom to notice how your kids are doing.
Yeah, I agree.
She said that I should have been paying closer attention and noticed it.
I told her that she had to learn to let go of certain things in the past in order to
move forward and that if Hailey did steal Sam as she claimed, then Hailey did her favor,
which okay, so then more reason not to fucking support your second daughter dating this monster.
Yeah.
She didn't want to hear that, but it needed to be said.
I also offered to put in a three-way call with Hailey, but she declined.
It's mom is nuts.
Yeah.
Whoa.
Then she gave me an ultimatum.
She said, if I go to the wedding, it means Hailey was my favorite child all along and
that she'll never speak to me again.
I told her that I'm going to the wedding just as I would have gone to hers if she was in
that situation.
She said, okay, and hung up later.
My husband calls me from work telling me she called him crying.
That's a lot, but I stand firm.
I think that supporting this daughter, like, yes, you should.
Maybe it's because I grew up with a very strict mother who would not let me be a piece
of shit.
My mom would not let me act like this.
Yeah, my mom would be like, I love you, but I'm going to love you from a distance because
I don't know who you are and I did not raise you to be this homewrecker.
Yes, absolutely.
And I'm not going to, me attending your wedding and letting you just get my unscathed is not
being a good parent.
It's not fair.
No, it's not fair to you.
It's not fair to your sister because it's telling her, feel free to fuck over your sister
and anyone for that matter and no repercussions.
No.
Absolutely unfair.
Yeah.
Like, it's so, so, so terrible.
No, I think, I stand with the dad.
Yeah.
I think this is fucked up.
The overall vote of this post was that she was the asshole.
That who's the asshole?
The mom.
Oh yeah.
Which is the one writing this.
Yeah.
So yes.
Fuck you.
Totally justified.
Rightfully so.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Just.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
No.
Yeah.
No.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
the like police or the law, like to drop the ticket,
to dismiss the ticket because it was a mistake
and you're cognizant of the laws and whatever.
But then you continue to fucking speed
or you continue to run the red lights.
You think the fucking police department's gonna look
at you and go like, yeah, okay, all right, we forgive you.
No, you have to show that you've learned from your mistakes.
Yeah, gotta go to traffic school.
Exactly, or pay a thousand dollar ticket,
whatever you feel like.
I think the other one that this person
replies to in their comment, she goes,
it was the point where the mom said,
I've told her that it's been over a year
since her and Sam broke up.
And she's been bitterly jumping
from relationship to relationship.
The person comments, wow, low blow.
You think that after a year,
after her fiance fucked her sister,
she should be in a solid relationship already?
Right.
Like, yeah.
Yeah, no, I agree.
And again, kind of right on.
She says that I don't understand
that Hailey purposefully stole Sam from her
and that she's been doing stuff like this
since they were kids.
Person goes, it's not your child's responsibility
to call things to your attention.
When you are neglectful,
it's your job as a parent to notice.
Yeah, yeah, especially when they're younger,
you're supposed to be cognizant
of like your kids' interactions.
Yeah, last one, mom saying,
if Hailey did steal Sam, as she claimed,
but the person goes,
what other explanation is there exactly?
Quote, as she claimed, literally, no one is denying it.
Right, like that's the thing is like,
Sam didn't just like trip and stumble into Hailey's lap.
Like, no.
He was in a full-blown engagement.
Hailey did something to pique his interest.
Right.
And fostered it, because it takes two to tango.
It does take two to tango.
So it could have been on Sam.
You know, maybe Sam initiated it.
Maybe it was just Hailey.
And then he like turned his head towards her,
like whatever it is.
But at the end of the day, like, if it was Sam,
Hailey shouldn't have pursued him.
And if it was Hailey,
Sam fucked over the sister he was supposed to marry.
But you know what it comes down to
in this whole grand scheme of things?
Sam is clearly not a good person.
Oh, not at all.
And whether it's Hailey, Jennifer, or your other daughter,
neither, none of your daughter should be marrying him.
No.
You know, like.
No.
And like the mom saying like, oh, well,
you know, Hailey did you a favor.
Okay.
Rightfully so.
Yeah.
But it doesn't matter that Hailey's still not right.
Right.
And you shouldn't support, you know,
one daughter destroying the other's life.
Like.
No.
It's kind of insane to me that this is even a question.
Like.
And I'm sure when you're in the thick of it,
you're like conflicted because you're a parent
and you're supposed to love and support all of your kids,
no matter what they do.
But that is crossing a lot of lines.
Oh yeah.
I mean, I just think if you truly want to be a good parent
to them, you need to show them and set boundaries
that you can't do that to your blood.
You can't.
And at the end of the day, like, yes,
that other daughter is going to be hurt and upset,
but like she has no one to blame but herself.
Right.
Like, sure.
It's kind of like, if you want to be with Sam so fucking bad,
we're not going to stop you.
Go ahead.
Go be with Sam.
But we're not going to sit around and sing Kumbaya.
And actively hurt the one.
No.
We stopped to support the other daughter that you hurt
and rightfully so we're supporting her.
And go have your fun life with Sam.
I hope he was worth it.
Yeah.
Like.
Oof.
Yeah.
Oof to that one.
Yeah.
Big oof.
Oof.
Well, that's all I have for you.
And your initiation into two hot takes.
This cheaters episode.
Love that for me.
Great, Fran.
I'll be back for stalkers.
Yes, seriously.
Well, thanks you guys for joining us
for another episode of Two Hot Takes.
If you have any cheaters stories
or need any advice on cheaters, send them my way.
This is actually a topic that I am a content expert on.
Yeah.
So send it my way.
Or weigh in on the stories.
Let us know if you think, if you think this family is,
is wrong.
Yes, like connect on Instagram, TikTok,
like let us know what you think about these stories,
especially the last one with poor Jennifer.
Yeah, if you're Hailey, fuck you.
Until next time.
See ya, bye.
The thought of my sons growing up without me inspired me
to quit smoking.
I talked to my doctors and then I threw away
all my cigarettes, ashtrays, and lighters.
I started exercising instead of smoking.
Staying away from alcohol when I was first quitting was key.
I kept on trying, learned something each time.
Do whatever it takes.
No matter how many times it takes.
We did it, so can you.
For free and confidential help, call 1-800-QUIT-NOW
or visit WayToQuit.org, developed by CDC.
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