Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! - Bonus: The Viral Load
Episode Date: March 23, 2020Here's an extra game from last week's show with Paula Poundstone, Maz Jobrani, and Luke Burbank.Learn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy...
Transcript
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Hi, it's Jennifer, Wait Wait producer. We made a show last weekend with Paula, Maz, and Luke all joining us from around the country. And we had a little bit of that show left over that we wanted to share with you.
We've got you, COVID.
Panel, we're going to throw the latest coronavirus news at you rapid fire, true or false style.
Get it right, you get a roll of toilet paper.
You ready to play?
Yeah, of course. All right, Maz, you're up first.
Maz, true or false?
During the debate on Sunday, Bernie Sanders and Joe Biden each pledged to fight coronavirus.
True.
No, it's false.
Bernie accidentally called it Ebola and Biden accidentally called it SARS.
Come on. It's true. Paula, true's false. Bernie accidentally called it Ebola and Biden accidentally called it SARS. Come on.
It's true. Paula, true or false?
The terrorist organization ISIS urged its members not to do terror in Europe to avoid contracting coronavirus.
True.
Yes. Luke, true or false?
Emergency operators are pleading with people to stop calling 911 when they run out of toilet paper.
True.
Yes. Maz, true or false?
9-1-1 when they run out of toilet paper.
True.
Yes.
Maz, true or false? The Financial Times reported that the pandemic has prompted a spike in philanthropic spending
by the wealthy.
False.
Right.
The Financial Times reported that rich people are debating whether to quarantine in Manhattan
or at their place in the Hamptons.
Paula, true or false?
Fox News ran a poll asking viewers to grade Trump's coronavirus responses either great,
fair, or needs improvement.
Yes.
No, it's false.
The poll was ranked superb, great, or very good.
Wow.
Luke, true or false, after several videos surfaced online, the makers of emergency powder urged people not to mix their product with vodka to make quarantinis.
100% true.
Yes.
Maz, true or false, a man was caught cheating on his wife after he got coronavirus while taking his mistress on a secret trip to Italy.
That's hilarious.
Let's go true.
Yes.
Luke, true or false, according to sources in the White House, aides were just able to
keep President Trump from falsely tweeting that Tom
Hanks had died because he didn't
understand what the word discharged
means. False.
That is true.
Paula, true or
false, a woman in Washington State
was disappointed when she learned
the soap she'd been washing her hands with
wasn't antibacterial.
True. No, it's false. She was embarrassed when she discovered the soap was actually been washing her hands with wasn't antibacterial. True.
No, it's false.
She was embarrassed when she discovered the soap was actually a block of cheese.
The woman had been eating cheese while drunk.
We all do.
Left the block out and it hardened.
She then scrubbed her hands with it for several days before saying, quote,
just realized my soap wasn't working because it's literally a block of cheese.
Still more effective than washing with Toms of Maine soap
Laugh now, but what if in six months she's the only person left who doesn't have coronavirus?
The cheese could have saved us all
And that is this week's Viral Load
I think I'll go for a walk outside now
The summer sun's calling my name
I hear you now, I just can't stay inside all day.
I gotta get out.
Give me some of those rays.