Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! - Wait Wait's Letter from the Editors III
Episode Date: November 25, 2020A bonus podcast featuring material from Wait Wait's cutting room floor. This week some leftovers from our show and a centerpiece for your Thanksgiving table.Learn more about sponsor message choices: p...odcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy
Transcript
Discussion (0)
May we? We may.
Welcome to Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me's Letter from the Editors,
where we bring you stuff we recorded for the show, but had to cut.
Three, two, one.
Uh, hello, hello, check one, two.
Hello, test one. Okay.
Test. Is this working? Test.
Test. I don't test well.
Testing.
Me, me, ma, mo, mo.
Are we recording, Wendell?
We are.
We are.
We'll be right back.
Hey, before we begin this week's bonus podcast, we have to tell you there is explicit language ahead.
You know what?
I'm just going to tell you.
We say the word a**hole, only we won't bleep it like we just did.
You'll just hear.
And if you're worried about it, it's a word that rhymes with, like, if you're going fishing,
if you're going bass fishing and you ask a friend if he could recommend a good bass hole,
the word we're going to say sounds like that. Or maybe, like, you have a coal-fired stove and you need to put some more coal in it.
So you say to your friend or your family member,
hey, can you pass coal for the stove?
Or if you're really into podcasts and you spend a lot of time
reading about Ira Glass and you kind of go into this glass hole.
So again, you're going to hear some curse words coming up,
but they won't be bleeped.
And it's just one curse word, the word ****.
And with that out of the way, let me welcome you to this week's Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me letter from the editors.
I'm Mike, and I'm here with Jennifer.
Hello.
And we are two of the show's editors or producers, and we have just a short little bonus podcast for you today.
Think of it as a sort of Thanksgiving snack.
Mike, I don't know about you, but this one was kind of hard to cut.
Here's more from Paula Poundstone, Mo Rocca, and Nagin Farsad.
Mo, this week, Ivanka Trump's high school best friend wrote an account of their relationship
for Vanity Fair.
She says her first memory of Ivanka was Ivanka blaming what on a classmate?
Losing the election as class president?
No, although that would be sort of weirdly prescient. No.
She blamed, oh, she put a kindergartner in a cage.
She, wait, hold on. I'm going to get this because I love this whole topic. Give me a clue.
Well, whoever blamed it, dealt it. Oh, she farted. She farted.
Yes. She blamed a fart on somebody else, according to a high school friend. Really,
isn't that kind of humanizing? I mean, who among us hasn't done that back in high school and then
years later grew up to become a Nazi? Well, wait, hold on a second. Was it an SBD or did she rip one?
Was it an SBD or did she rip one?
I have to tell you that I do not know.
Imagine telling a story like that and not filling in that critical detail.
I know. It never occurred to me.
There's only more questions that come up.
You know, it's true.
I guess I can't, Mo, I realize now I can't answer you in this way.
The fart was so bad that this friend remembered it for 30 years.
Wow, boy.
I wonder what she was eating before then.
Anyway, isn't it weird to hear a story about Ivanka's asshole
when it's not referring to Jared Kushner?
I also don't feel like Jared Kushner has an asshole.
You know what I mean?
I feel like he just anatomically, it's like a plastic Ken butt.
So we've been talking a lot on the show about how this year,
obviously the holidays are going to look different.
And some of you guys might not be having quite the big boisterous holiday meal that you're used to.
So we've done something to help you out. The next few minutes are a little soundtrack for your Thanksgiving feast. tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, tasty, warm and festive Thanksgiving. So from all of us, happy Thanksgiving.
Hmm.
Hello.
No, she doesn't.
Well, good for you.
It's an Alanis Morissette song.
What's that?
Gross.
Uncle Tim's the worst.
He's always talking about how he's on the keto diet.
And where is she now?
Yeah.
So you're like an owl, basically, is what you're saying.
Ooh, Peter Sagal, you went there.
Yeah.
I'm not going to answer anything after what you just said.
Pilar let it juice her
Oh yes
Bonk, bonk
Mmm
Please pass the green bean tuna casserole
That whole thing wasted
It's when you suck the breath out of a turkey
Kill our own turkey
Can I interrupt though
Wouldn't it have made more sense
To go from pee pee to poo poo
I'm just saying if you're doing things sequentially
Who are you asking
Oh you are too nice like if you're doing things sequentially. Who are you asking?
Oh, you are too nice.
And that's what makes me special.
That's how I get rid of the ghosts in my room.
It's all curbside pickup.
It's just been sitting on the curb forever.
Mmm, yum.
Okay, so I don't know what you're saying.
It's so
natural.
Susan, it's time to
turn that page.
Floor let it
juice, sir.
Terrific.
That was awesome.
Excuse me.