Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! - WWDTM: James Marsden

Episode Date: June 17, 2023

James Marsden joins panelists Adam Felber, Karen Chee, and Faith Salie to talk Jury Duty, playing yourself, and what it's like to be the Baxter in a romcom.Learn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy

From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm the studly baker at the Studebaker. Bill Curtis. And here's your host at the Studebaker Theater at the Fine Arts Building in Chicago, Illinois, Peter Sagal. Thank you, Bill. Thank you, everybody. Yeah, it is going to be a fun show. Later on, we're going to be joined by actor James Marsden.

You may know him from 27 Dresses or Cyclops from the X-Men movies. He recently played an obnoxious version of himself in the fake reality show Jury Duty, and we were very happy to find out that we were going to be able to talk to the real James Marsden. But then we realized, what if the real guy is actually worse? But we want to hear, as always, the best version of you, so give us a call to play our games. The number is 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Now let's welcome our first listener contestant.

Hi, you're on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Hi, my name's Lisa. I'm so excited to be here. And I'm from Phoenix. I'm very excited to have you, Lisa. Where are you calling from? I'm calling from Phoenix, and I am a native Phoenician. A native Phoenician.

Oh, you Phoenicians. I guess while I've got you, thanks for the alphabet. That's great. Such an NPR joke. I know, it really is. Wow, you know your demo, Fagel. Peter, I think you just got a raise. Well, Lisa, welcome to the show.

Let me introduce you to our panel this week. First up, a comedian and writer who is currently on strike, living in Brooklyn, New York. It's Karen Chee. Hello. Next is the director of the new YouTube climate-oriented comedy show, Un-effing the Planet. Find it at uftp.world.

It's Adam Felber. Hello. Hi, Lisa. And a contributor to CBS Sunday Morning and host of the podcast Real Good and Health Matters, it's Faith Saley. Hey, Lisa. Well, Lisa, welcome to the show.

You are going to play Who's Bill this time. Bill Curtis is going to read you three quotations from this week's news. If you can correctly identify or explain just two of them, you will win our prize. Any voice from our show you might choose on your voicemail. Are you ready to go? Ready. All right. Now, your first quote comes from an avid political supporter putting a brave face on this week's events.

There's nothing that says he can't be president inside prison. So, who might be our first imprisoned president? Donald Trump. It is Donald Trump, yes. Donald Trump. It is true. He is in legal peril and there is no prohibition in the Constitution against serving while in prison. It would be awesome. It'll be great when he has to give the State of the Union through plexiglass, holding one of those phones they have to use.

I picture him tied to a gurney Hannibal Lecter style. Possibly. Doesn't he only get one phone call? He's going to have to be very efficient for four years of work on one phone call. I love that that's what we can have POTUS stand for, Prisoner of the United States. Exactly, yeah. I don't know what the content of that one phone call is going to be,

but I know it's going to be perfect. Exactly. All of his art. Now, the indictment included photos showing stolen classified documents stored in a bathroom on the floor and in the shower. So not only are these documents a threat to national security, now they're all pruney. And they've seen things. Terrible things. Can we talk about that photo?

We're not just talking a few boxes. It's like when you're moving out of your college dorm. I mean, it was to the sky. And it was also just, first of all, marble should never be dark. It was a dark marble bathroom. And then it's like a tension rod shower curtain. So not just crimes against national security, crimes against fashion. Thank you.

Thank you, yes. Yeah, one of the counts was for interior design. It's true. All right. Your next quote comes from the New York Times. Dunking Oreos in water instead of milk is a beige flag. Now, that was an example of the subject of the article, beige flags. And that's the new term for sort of benign but baffling traits that come up when people

are engaged in what social activity? Dating. Dating, exactly right. So to explain this to those people who aren't currently dating because you're married or have given up or both, beige flags are a major cut below red flags right they're the little things that cause you to pause maybe for three seconds before saying to yourself well it's better than living alone and here's an actual and here's an example just to explain to everybody what this is uh your your date saying i listen to wait wait don't tell me oh that's normal that's great but saying i only listen to wait wait don, Don't Tell Me. Oh, that's normal. That's great. But saying, I only listen to Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.

That's a beige flag. Or perhaps he shows up and he wears only beige. Beige flag. It's like if someone's like, oh, my favorite show is The Office, but I love season six. Wow. You know? You're like, oh, yeah, it is a good show.

It's a strange season to be your favorite. Right. Yeah. Does this, I mean, I believe out of the people here, you're the only one who's single. So is this something you've experienced? Weird that you assumed. Wow. Yeah.

But it is so true. I thought beige flags also included things that were like just a little bit boring. Yeah. Right? Yeah. But let me give you some examples that people in real life have called beige flags. Adults who drink a glass of milk just for pleasure.

Yeah. Someone, all right. Milk for pleasure. No, I mean. That's a red flag, my dude. That's what you do for fun. All right, I see what you mean. I was trying to imply like they don't have to

for some nutritional reason. They're just like, you know what I'd like? A tall, cold glass of milk. But I understand what it sounded like was mmm. Okay, that's That would be drinking a glass of milk for an extreme pleasure. Yeah, I know. I think a better way to understand it is beige

flags are what used to be known as things that seem quirky now, but after three years of marriage will drive you insane with rage. Give us a couple more. All right. Here's one. Somebody who kisses their dog on their mouth. No. Red.

Red. Red, really? Scarlet. Crimson. Oh. You know, people, though, now that if this becomes popular, people are going to use this to downplay their actual, like, serious faults. Like, my beige flag is that I've never been faithful to a woman. All right, Lisa, here is your last quote.

I couldn't be happier to have shared the stage with you for all these years. That was Vanna White talking about Pat Sajak announcing his retirement after 40 years of hosting what? Ooh, is it Jeopardy? It is not. Wow. That is a beige flag right there. You need to stay in Phoenix, Lisa,

because this crowd. Yeah, you have so profoundly offended our audience. It's another very long-running game show. It's another very long-running game show. It's spinning around in your head. It's Wheel of Fortune. Wheel of Fortune, yes.

So, okay. Wheel of Fortune. If you don't know what Wheel of Fortune is, ask your mother to ask hers. Wheel of Fortune,, ask your mother to ask hers. Wheel of Fortune, seriously, has been on TV so long, the invention of the wheel was for Wheel of Fortune. It's like, we need something to spin.

What do you got? Well, I've got this thing in my workshop. Mr. Sajak, after 40 years of retiring, he says he will now do what most people do when they retire, watch Wheel of Fortune. I mean, how... I don't know if you've seen that show in the last couple of decades, but how different is retirement from hosting Wheel of Fortune? I mean, it's puttering no matter how you do it.

Less strangers walking through your house. Right, you're just in your garden now. Yeah, I know. I'd like to buy a trowel. He actually says... He says that he will no longer host, but he will go on to be a consultant to the show. What?

It's hangman. What kind of consulting can you do? He's like, hey, you know, I got an idea. Why don't we just make up words out of random letters? Make them guess that. And they're like, yeah, great, Pat. So, uh, how's Boca? Maybe they'll use this opportunity just like zhuzh it up make it modern like I'd like to buy a poop emoji Bill how did Lisa do on our quiz

incredible three out of three yay thank you Lisa thank you thank you Lisa thanks for calling. Stay cool. Take care. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Right now, panel, it is time for you to answer some questions about this week's news. Adam, a new book encourages couples to have a monthly, quote, State of the Union talk about what part of their relationship. Sex life.

Exactly right. I'm somehow embarrassed that you figured that out so quickly. Did you say monthly? Monthly, yes. A monthly state of the union. She calls it, this author, the sexual state of the union. Can you imagine finishing your sexual state of the union, and then you have to let Marco Rubio give a response?

Also, Kevin McCarthy is behind you with notes. Yeah. Better that than Nancy Pelosi clapping ironically. The author, she's a sex expert and therapist named Emily Moore. She says that most problems with couples' sex lives are really problems with communication. So she says couples should check in with a frank discussion of, quote, what's working, what's not, and where things are headed next. She says that you should have... Where things are headed next?

Where things are headed next. Yeah, it also sounds like, is this literal? We're moving gradually toward the headboard, I think. Even that phrase, what's working and what's not, changes as you get older. That's true. That's why she says you have to have this conversation with your partner once a month, which seems crazy. Why talk about sex more often than you have sex? But a state of the union, I mean,

in my marriage, we don't need to stand up and applaud any more than we already do. And of course, it gets really awkward when your partner starts inviting special guests to be there. And some of them yell, you lie! Exactly. Coming up, we're lying to our dear old dads

in a special Father's Day Bluff the Listener game. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT-TO-PLAY. We'll be back in a minute with more Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPO. From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis. We are playing this week with Faith Saley, Karen G., and Adam Felber. And here again is your host at the Studebaker Theater in Chicago, Illinois, Peter Sagal. Thank you so much, Bill. Thank you so much, everybody.

Right now it is time for the Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me Bluff the Listener Game. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to play our game on the air. Hi, you are on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Hi, this is Claudia. I'm calling from Gardnerville, Nevada. Gardnerville, Nevada. I have never heard of Gardnerville, Nevada. What do you do there? I teach at Chico State. I teach teachers how to teach math. You teach teachers how to teach math? Yes. Who taught you? That's good. math. Yes. Who taught you? That's good. I imagine the most important lesson is just pretend that you know what's going on. At all times. Confidence. Confidence. Well, Claudia, welcome to the show. You're going to play the game in which you must try to tell truth from fiction. Bill, what is

Claudia's topic? Happy Father's Day. That's right. This weekend, of course, is Father's Day, and we're going to honor dads by celebrating the things they've taught us, whether it's, you know, how to toss a baseball or go ask your mother. Our panelists are going to tell you about a new and rather unusual fatherly lesson we heard about. Pick the one who's telling the truth, and you'll win our prize. Your father finally telling you. He's proud of you. Are you ready to play? Yes, I am.

All right. First, let's hear from Adam Felber. Like a lot of children, Kip Pastor's kids were embarrassed by their father's endless dad jokes. Although Kip always said they'd appreciate those someday, little did any of them know he'd be able to teach them the value of dad humor by saving their lives with it. It was 9 p.m. on June 2nd when a botched robbery at a Best Buy in Grand Rapids became a hostage situation.

Kip immediately sprung into action saying, quote, Hey, I get it. I once saw a sign that said man wanted for robbery, so I went in and applied for the job. What followed during the ensuing three-hour standoff was a barrage of kip regaling their captors with tales like the time the French cheese factory exploded and debris was everywhere. And the time when his wife told him to sink her phone

and he threw it in the pool. And his favorite, that because he was an amateur drummer, he had wanted to name the twins Anna One, Anna Two. Those terrible jokes kept the tension low, and by the time the standoff ended peacefully, the robbers had grown to love their corny hostage, and everyone parted as friends. Although two were arrested, and two had to admit that dad might not be quite as lame as they'd thought. As Kip himself put it, there's only one way to tell when a joke becomes a dad joke, when it becomes a parent. A dad teaches his children

the value of dad jokes by diffusing a hostage situation with them. Your next daddy issue comes from Faith Saley. If you're feeling out of touch with your loved ones, maybe excluded from family events, you might reach out to your kin to reconnect or do some soul searching about your role in the estrangement. Or you could fake your own death and see who shows up at your funeral. That's the choice Belgian dad David Bertin made last week when he surprised mourners in a field in Liege, yelling, cheers to you all, welcome to my funeral. The 45-year-old jumped out of a helicopter

with nothing but a camera crew and his colossal narcissism and was greeted with a few hugs and many confused looks from family members who remembered why they never wanted to spend time with him. Bartend's daughter was in on the prank and had posted on Facebook, rest in peace, daddy. Why you? We will never forget you. Thousands of TikTok commenters didn't forget to show up to insult him in many languages, including one who said of Barton's resurrection delivered by Chopper, quote, this is what I thought would be the season finale of Succession. A man, a dad, a dad teaches the importance of family by faking his own death and then surprising the mourners.

Your last story of paternal patiching comes from Karen Chee. Thomas Stockton of Gainsbourg, Louisiana, always warned his two children not to talk to strangers, which so far is normal parenting. But to really drive that point home, Stockton started dressing up in random costumes and bumping into them on the street to see if they would say hi to him. That, to be clear, is not normal parenting. Whenever one of his children fell for it, Stockton would pull off his wig and sunglasses and yell, gotcha, and wave finger guns and go, pew, pew. Unfortunately, instead of scaring the children,

the plan has backfired. They now regularly go up to strangers and ask, Dad, is that you? This story came to national news this week when Stockton wrote it down as part of his Craigslist listing for a, quote, creepy kidnapper van, which he had purchased to use in the scheme but then ultimately decided to sell

instead. The van sold for $600 and Stockton is now using the normal method of teaching his kids about strangers, having them reenact old episodes of To Catch a Predator. All right, so here are your choices. Which of these was the fatherly lesson we read about this week? Was it from Adam Felber, how a dad showed the value of dad jokes by diffusing a hostage situation? From Faith Saley, a man who taught the value of staying connected to family by faking his own death and then trying to shame the mourners? Or from Karen Chee, a father who tried to teach his children not to talk to strangers and ended up teaching them to talk to strangers.

They're all amazing, but I think I'm going to go with Faith's story about the fake funeral. Yes, Faith. You're choosing Faith's story. The man in Belgium who faked his own death just to get back at his relatives. All right. Well, to bring you the correct answer, we spoke with someone with expertise in the real story. He faked his own death, and then during the funeral ceremony, he arrived on a helicopter.

That was Liz Eddy. She was the CEO of Lantern, an end-of-life planning service, talking about the dad who faked his own death. And I think I can tell you that Ms. Eddy did not approve. Congratulations, Claudia. You got it right. Faith, of course, is telling the truth. Yes, she is, Claudia. You earned a point for her. Thank you. You've won our prize,

the voice of anyone you might choose for your voicemail. Thank you so much for playing. Thank you. All right, take care. Bye. You too. Bye. Bye.

Hey, there are you swinging cascades Who's back in town The old granddaddy near Richard Maynard He's in the house and he's bringing it down Hey, there are you swinging cats, cats, who's back in town? The old friend, daddy, the original man, he's in the house and he's bringing it down. It don't matter who you are. And now the game where we ask somebody with a lot of experience to do something they've never experienced. It's called Not My Job. Actor James Marsden has done a lot of things, from playing an X-Man to a singing Prince Charming. But he has gone viral recently playing himself in the hit show Jury Duty.

That is the fake reality show in which everybody's an actor except for one person, and that person has to deal with a strangely obnoxious James Marsden. The real James Marsden joins us now, I hope. James Marsden, welcome to Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. now, I hope. James Marsden, welcome to Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. I have been a fan of you for many, many years, seen you in many, many things, but I've never seen anything that you've done blow up like jury duty. And so before, if people haven't seen it, let's see if we can describe it. I've

heard you describe it as a cross between The Office and The Truman Show is that right basically it was how do we create The Office with all the populate the jury duty with you know a bunch of the improv artists myself playing a kind of heightened version of myself a sort of entitled Hollywood celebrity version of myself and one guy that thinks the whole thing is real. So, but I'm very curious as to how you got involved in this very experimental thing. I imagine they said to you, we want you to play this arrogant version of yourself to see if we can annoy our hero enough to hate you.

And the whole thing may be a complete disaster, in which case everyone will hate you for pranking this guy. And you're like, sign me up? Absolutely. you for pranking this guy. And you're like, sign me up? Absolutely. Well, I mean, I guess I'd be lying to you if I said it didn't sound fun to kind of lampoon your, like I said, the entitled Hollywood actor who just wants every conversation to be about him. Did you ever like feel self-conscious? Like you just wanted to say, no, actually I'm really nice. Of course. But I knew that that wouldn't be very fun. You kind of ruined the whole thing for everybody else, right?

It was a dance. It was a balancing act because you're figuring out what's going to turn him off or make him uncomfortable and you can't go too far with it. But, you know, you still got to push these comedy beats. Right, right. So you've been talking about it, doing a lot of interviews. And I read that you said that at certain points during the production, you actually began to worry if you were the one that they were trying to fool somehow. Like if the real thing was, let's get James Marsden and tell him that we're doing this thing with another person

who doesn't know that it's fake, but in reality, that's an actor, and James won't know that it's fake. It's literally true. I mean, you just, I've never done a project like this, so you don't trust anyone. No, you don't. No one you can trust. In fact, I called all my improv friends, like Ben Schwartz, who does the voice of Sonic,

and a brilliant improv artist. I told him about the process and the conceit of the show, and the first words out of his mouth were like, make sure they're not pranking you. Wow. The final episode or rather the penultimate episode, you reveal everything to him. This has all been faked. Actors, none of this was real. And how did it feel on that day? Were you guys worried about what his reaction would be? Were you afraid, for example, he'd freak out and be angry or upset or something? Yes. Yes. We were more nervous about that moment

than any other moment in the show because, you know, you just think, if that was me, how would I react? I mean, I can't even handle a surprise birthday party, let alone being surrounded by, you know, everyone in his reality for three weeks was putting on a show. And that's a long time to measure

somebody's human experience three weeks of their life. So we made and that's a long time to mess with somebody's human experience three weeks of their life so we made sure that we all ran up to him immediately afterwards and let him know that yes all those you know the kind of absurd circumstances that we put him through was fake but the friendships and like getting to know each other that was all very real right right and i i heard that you you had to spend time with him and like talk him down and like assure him that you really after it was all over and like no no, I really like you. We're friends. So I kept in touch with him for a good, you know, a couple of weeks, months after just checking on him and see how he was doing. And he was like, a couple of weeks after he was like, am I still being filmed?

Really? He was like, James, are they, is there a camera in the flower pot? Really? There's no reason why you should believe me, but I promise you, it's all over, my friend. Oh, God. At least to the best of your knowledge. Yeah, I mean, as far as you know, maybe you're also being filmed. All you can do is keep it a secret for one year now until the show comes out.

Exactly. No problem. You, in your remarkable and eclectic career, have played the guy who gets the girl, like in 27 Dresses, and you play the guy who should get the girl but doesn't like in the notebook and enchanted and Superman returns where you lose Lois Lane to Superman that's not fair go on twist the knife I mean isn't it

flattering because they're casting you as the guy who she's supposed to be with because you're so fantastically handsome and charming just to underline how strong the attraction is. Oh, my God, she'd leave him for that guy. So you're like, you know, it's a compliment. Or it's the ultimate insult, which is like, he's this good-looking guy, and then she's attracted to him, and she still doesn't end up with him. I know, but speaking of that, I'm just going to ask you. But speaking of that, I'm just going to ask you, you have to agree with like every right thinking person that in the notebook, Rachel McAdams should have married you. I mean, come on.

Well, that didn't create quite a stir in the audience there, did it? No, no, no. Not as much as you might have hoped. There is a young generation now that like, she should have been with you. The relationship with Miller was a toxic relationship. Really? Oh God. Is there, I was trying to figure this out. I had young daughters who were extremely excited about Enchanted in which you play Prince Charming. And I am also a geek. So I was in the theater to see the X-Men movies you did as Cyclops. And so between the two of those things, which are very different, I have no idea what a

James Marsden role is. Do you? Well, you just described it in your previous question, the guy who never gets the girl. Really? Yeah, well, I mean, yeah, like you said at the beginning of the interview, nothing has gone so stratospheric as quickly as Jury Duty has. So you're let off the hook there that you haven't seen all the other movies in between. But you now have some homework to do. Yeah, I know. For example, you starred in a movie called Hop, in which you were the live-action buddy to an animated Easter Bunny played by Russell Brand.

And you mean to tell me you haven't seen that a hundred times? I actually, I just, I don't have a question about that. I just wanted to bring it up. Yeah, there it is. Well, James Marsden, it is a pleasure to talk to you and we have invited you here to play a game we're calling... Objection! So as we have been talking about, you served on this fake jury, so we thought

it would be a natural thing to ask you three questions about real juries. Get two of these right, you will win our prize for one of our listeners. Bill, who is James Marsden playing for? Shane Gill of Cleveland, Ohio. Alright. Ready to play? I'm going to have to. I'm going to try.

Here we go. Here's your first question. The jurors in a murder trial in Britain in 1994 arrived at their guilty verdict by doing what? A, observing that the defendant had his fingers crossed during the whole trial. B, asking a Ouija board if he did it or not. Or C, waiting for the made-for-TV movie to be produced about the trial and then seeing how that ended. I'm just going to have a little fun and go with A.

You're going to go with A. Fingers crossed the whole time on the stand. No, it was actually the Ouija board. What? They were sequestered as you were in jury duty and they got together in one of the hotel rooms and they pulled out a Ouija board and they asked him if the guy was guilty. And he said he was. Once discovered, the verdict was reversed. Okay, you have two more chances. A juror in another British case got sentenced for contempt of court.

What did she do that was so bad? Was it A, every time the plaintiff spoke, the juror made the law and order dun-dun sound? B, she insisted that she outranked the jury foreman because she was the five men. Or C, she friended the defendant on Facebook and kept him updated on what was going on in the jury room. I'm going to go with C. You're right. That's what she did.

Interestingly, in that case, the juror served two months for contempt of court, and the defendant got off entirely because of the mistrial. All right, here's your last question. Get this one right. You win. Here we go. One juror in a trial a while ago said he couldn't serve in the jury

because he had terrible gas. And the judge refused that request. Not a good excuse. Put him on the jury. And then what happened? A, he eventually farted so terribly in court that the judge vomited and the lawyer fainted. B, his story was made into the classic courtroom film

12 Stinky Men. Or C, the man exploded. I'm going to have to go with A. I mean, all of these sound crazy. That's what happened, apparently. The judge should have listened. Bill, how did James Marsden do in our quiz? He won our game completely with two out of three right.

There you go. That's the verdict. James Marsden stars in Jury Duty. That's the verdict. James Marsden stars in Jury Duty. It's on Amazon. Trust me, try it, and you will probably spend the rest of the night watching the whole thing. James Marsden, thank you so much for joining us on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Bye. In just a minute, Bill has a brilliant solution to high baggage fees

on our Listener Limit Challenge. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to join us on the air. We'll be back in a minute with more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis. We are playing this week with Adam Felber, Faith Seeley, and Karen Chee. And here again is your host at the Studebaker Theater in Chicago, Illinois, Peter Sagal. Thank you, Bill. Thank you, everybody.

In just a minute, if making two words sound alike is a rhyme, then lock Bill up. It's our listener limerick challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. Making two words sound alike is a rhyme, then lock Bill up. It's our listener Limerick challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924 right now, panel. Some more questions for you from the week's news. Adam, one of the problems that will have to be solved in a mission to Mars is the food supply, right? One innovation that would allow the astronauts to make their own food on the way is being developed, and that method uses what as a key ingredient?

Humans. Sort of. Recycled parts of humans. I'm going to need a better hint than that, because I feel like I probably was. If they go with this method, the astronauts will be forbidden from using Listerine or even Altoids. Breath? Yes. Astronaut breath.

Ah. That would be the only kind of breath you can get in the spaceship. That's true, yes. The idea is that astronauts exhale, like we all do, carbon dioxide, which can be used to grow yeast, which can then be used to make dough. So, bingo, astronaut breath pizza. That's how they'll do it. Imagine you're in the capsule, right?

You come across one of your fellow astronauts, and she's going, and you're like, what? She says, I'm throwing a dinner party. If somebody's having a panic attack and hyperventilating, that's their food source. Right, exactly. Finally, this man's having anxiety.

Mary is having claustrophobia. We'll eat like kings. They're also all going to have a favorite, right? Everyone's going to love one guy's breath more than their own. They're going to be constantly asking him to jog in the centrifuge just to come up with a little more.

This isn't like the pizza that Gus used to breathe. Karen, Netflix is canceling shows. They're not letting you share passwords, but their latest idea to increase their revenue is to do what? A bake sale. So close. Ooh, lemonade stand.

No, you're getting there. Ooh, hot dog stand? Getting even bigger. Ooh, hamburger. No, bigger than a hot dog stand, bigger than a hamburger stand. To a hamburger. No, bigger than a hot dog stand, bigger than a hamburger stand. To a restaurant. Yes, to open a restaurant.

No way. That's what they're doing. Sadly, it will not be called Stranger Wings or Netflix and Chili. They announced they will open a pop-up restaurant at the end of this month. They're getting fans excited to go spend an hour deciding what they want to eat and then give up and just have the soup from Seinfeld again. So they say that the menu in this restaurant will be inspired by their programming. But how exactly? Will they drop like the entire 12-course tasting menu on your table all at once and then when you finish immediately try to shove more food down your throat? Click here. Your next meal will start in four seconds. No, wait, I can't find the bar. Can one person pay for it and everybody eat? There you go. Not anymore, Adam.

They changed that rule. Adam, this week, the Wall Street Journal real estate section published the most Wall Street Journal real estate section headline ever. For a thousand points, winning this game and all games in the future, what was it? Stalled economy takes toll on mansion owners. No. Is it like, you are poor and it's your fault? No. Karen, good guess poor and it's your fault? No, Karen, good guess, but that's the op-ed page.

Oh, sorry. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll give it to you. The headline was, how many pavilions is too many pavilions? Yeah, I can see I wasn't going to guess that. We've all been there. It's the hardest choice we all have to face. How many pavilions will you build around your 11,000 square foot mansion? Here's a tip.

If you're embarrassed by how many pavilions you have, you can repurpose a few with solariums. That's true. Yeah, I have a question. So not to sound incredibly middle class, but what is a pavilion? A pavilion, Karen. It's kind of like, it's like an open-air room with a roof but no walls. Oh, a tent. Hey, before we get back to the show, a plug for our next bonus episode

featuring our extended interview with the legendary actor John Goodman. If I had to choose which of your Coen Brothers movies would have been a cult hit, I would have gone for Barton Fink. Yeah, that's one I want to do over on. Really? Why? There's a couple of scenes I didn't quite cut the mustard.

Really? But we can't do that. You can't go back and... Well, maybe with AI. Yeah, I guess so. That's in our next bonus episode. And listen for an exclusive pre-sale ticket offer for our upcoming shows this September in Los Angeles

and Ann Arbor. That's in our next bonus episode for Wait Wait Don't Tell Me Plus supporters. Coming up, it's lightning fill in the blank, but first it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme. If you'd like to play on air, call or leave a message at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. You can catch us most weeks

right here at the Studebaker Theatre in Chicago or under the stars at Tanglewood in western Massachusetts next week on June 22nd and in Los Angeles at the Greek Theatre on September 28th. Plus, check out the Wait, Wait stand-up tour in Charleston, South Carolina on July 14th and Durham, North Carolina on July 15th. Tickets and info about all of it is at nprpresents.org. Hi, you're on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Hello.

Hi. This is Supreme Hackers calling from Lincoln, Nebraska. Lincoln, Nebraska. A lovely place, home of the university. I have been there. What do you do there? I'm a student, so I'm a full-time college student. Oh my gosh, you're a corn husker.

I actually go to a private university there, but sure yeah Excuse me Well Sophia welcome to the show Bill Curtis is gonna read you three news-related Limericks with the last word or phrase missing from each if you can fill in that last word or phrase correctly in two of the Limericks you will be a winner ready to play Yeah. Yeah, okay. You sound enthusiastic. Here we go. Here is your first limerick. It's like science that's meant for a rocket. So much storage you really can't knock it. This great fishing vest meets the carry-on test, and my luggage will fit in its... Pockets?

Yes, pockets. Very good. According to the New York Post, in response to increasing fees to check their bags from airlines, people are walking onto airplanes wearing fishing vests, you know, with all the pockets, with all the many pockets stuffed with their possessions. Which is great for the other people because there's nothing like sitting there in a crowded plane with like one empty seat left right next to you and you see a guy walking towards you wearing the entire contents of his bedroom closet on his torso.

It makes sense though because fishing vests, if you've seen them, fly fishing vests, they're just wearable bags but you have to be careful not to store your toothbrush in the worm pocket. I've taken to wearing a lot of layers, like 12 of them. Sure. Like 12 shirts? Yeah. Oh my gosh. You get them all across. Aren't you sweaty and sad? One shirt gets a little sweaty. Oh, and the rest

are fine? Yes. Yeah, that's a pretty good deal. No follow-up questions. Alright, here is your next limerick. Playing vinyl for kids is just cruel. Parents, stop, because you look like a fool. A forced love for the cure will never be pure. Stop trying to make your kids. I have no idea.

Well, it rhymes with fool and cruel, and it's a way of being that people want their kids to be. I have no idea. No idea. It's tough. The answer is cool. Stop trying to make it cool. A Washington Post op-ed this week by a music writer

called out parents who try too hard to impress their own cool tastes on their kids. Nothing is more distressing to other people than an eight-year-old goth. I do think I have adopted my parents' musical tastes, like, exactly. Really? What are they? I'm 28. I've been to three Billy Joel concerts.

Wow. Wow. I love the man. Thank you. I respect him, too. That's terrifying. All right. Here's your last limerick. I respect him too that's terrifying alright here's your last limerick

if they only were 50s or 20s but they're coins and I've got far too many now I'm dragging around more than 5,000 pounds I've inherited 1 million pennies pennies yes a California

woman's family was cleaning out her late father's house when they discovered her father's true legacy hidden away in a basement crawl space a million pennies stuffed into truckloads of sacks boxes and bags ma'am why couldn't it have been something more normal

like the bodies of his victims? So they have a million pennies, which they dragged out, and then they couldn't figure out what to do with them. No bank would take them. But one banker suggested that they might really have a treasure because some rare pennies are worth a million dollars or more. So the family sat down to sort through the pennies to find that one penny and quit after one hour.

That's right. It was so boring, they would not do it for a million dollars. You'd think they would have thought that through and just not started. When you're looking at a pile of a million pennies, I don't go like, oh, I need an hour of this to prove to me that this is going to suck. Anyway, they are offering the whole lot of pennies for sale, so if you're looking

for a new excuse to never leave the house for the next five years, get in touch. Wait, but are they selling it for more than $10,000? They're selling it for more than $10,000. You did, Matt. I was embarrassed. I was trying to think, how much is a million pennies worth? Truly, and you just figured it out.

Knock off two years. Good for you. I didn't do that in my dream. Your answer was seven. Bill, how did Sophia do in our quiz? Two out of three. Sophia, we're going to pay you off in pennies. Well done, Sophia. Thanks for playing.

Thank you. Take care. Now on to our final game, Lightning Fill in the Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as they can. Each correct answer is now worth two points.

Bill, can you give us the scores? Karen has two. Adam has two. Faith has three. Okay. All right. So Karen and Adam are tied for second. I will say, Karen, you're going to go first. The clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank. Following a fire caused by a fuel tanker truck, officials thought that a damaged bridge on Interstate blank would be demolished. 95. Yes. On Monday, notorious former Italian Prime Minister Blank died at the age of 86. Silvio B. Berlusconi. Yes. This week, the Southern Baptist Convention voted to expel two churches for having pastors who were blank. Really nice to each other? No. Women. On Wednesday, Texas Governor Greg Abbott sent another busload of blanks to California.

Migrants. Right. Following the smoke that drifted in from Canadian wildfires, Google says that New York saw a 2,000% increase in searches for blank. Air filters. No. Searches for, quote, how to sell my house fast. No way.

Wow. On Thursday, the Supreme Court upheld a law that prioritizes native families for native children up for blank. Abduction? Yes. Best known for his novels The Road and Blood Meridian, acclaimed author blank passed away at the age of 89. Yes, this week a wake in Ecuador was

interrupted after the mourners realized blank. They were alive! That person was alive! Yes, and they knew it because the dead woman started knocking on the inside of the coffin. What? Right. The woman had been

declared dead for over 24 hours when she woke up during the wake and knocked on the lid of her coffin until someone got her out. Oh my God.

She'd actually woken up a few hours earlier but she didn't want to interrupt what seemed like a very nice service for a lovely woman. I was going to say, I hate interrupting, like, big events. I feel like at that point I would just try and die.

Bill, how did Karen do on our quiz? Very good. Six right. Twelve more points. Total of 14 in the lead. All right. Adam, you are up next. Please fill in the blank.

This week, a UK panel ruled that former Prime Minister Boris Johnson had intentionally misled Parliament over the parties held during blank. The pandemic. Yeah, lockdown. On Thursday, several government agencies were hit in a global blank attack. Cyber. Yes, cyber attack. On Wednesday, the leader of Palestine met with blank in Beijing.

Xi. Yes, Xi attack. On Wednesday, the leader of Palestine met with blank in Beijing. Xi. Yes, Xi Jinping. God bless you. Following a week's long search, a man wanted by police in Malta was found in blank. Malta. No, already in prison. On Tuesday, the Denver Nuggets beat the Miami Heat to win their first blank championship. NBA.

On Thursday, NASA confirmed that a skyscraper-sized blank had passed by the Earth. Asteroid. Yes, an economic report from Sweden blames skyrocketing inflation there on blank. The meatball famine. No, on Beyoncé. Last month, so many tourists flocked to Stockholm to see the opening concert of Beyoncé's latest tour that hotel and restaurant prices there rose 3.3%.

Oh, my God. That's a pretty big increase, but doesn't even factor in her impact on the 10-year swagger note and sleigh futures. Bill, how did Adam do on our quiz? Five right, ten more points, totaled 12, trails Karen. How many, then, does Faith need to win? Six to win. All right, then. Here we go, Faith. This is for the game.

After being arrested as part of a probe into her party's finances, Nicola Sturgeon, the former First Minister of Blank, was released on Monday. Scotland. Yes. Following pressure from the White House, ticketing giant Blank announced plans to get rid of so-called junk fees. Ticketmaster. Yes. This week, the Federal Reserve paused its campaign of raising Blank rates.

Interest. Yes. On Wednesday, rescue teams searched for survivors of a shipwreck off the coast of blank. Greece. Yes. In order to avoid parking fines from the city, a man in Taipei blanked. Moved all the meters. No.

Parked his van on the top of his house. On Thursday, nine more women sued disgraced comedian blank for assault. Bill Cosby. Yes. On Wednesday, it was announced thatank was no longer the best-selling beer in America. Bud Light. Yes, this week a man called the cops after he asked

a woman what perfume she was wearing, and she told him Blank. Astronaut breath. No, she told him... She told him it was Juliet has a gun. And as I'm sure all the fashionistas know, Karen's not, and Juliet has a gun is not a threat. It is a real perfume by Romano Ricci. And after police arrived in the scene, the misunderstanding

was explained, and instead of arresting the woman, they arrested the man for using, hey, what perfume are you wearing as a pickup line? Bill, did Faith do well enough to win? It's very close. Six right, 12 more points. With one point making the win for Faith. There you go. I don't care. You don't care about such things. I don't care. Faith is not involved.

I'm not here to win. Coming up, our panelists predict after Pat Sajak's retirement, what will be the next big news in game shows. But first, let me tell you that Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is a production of NPR and WBEZ Chicago in association with Urgent Haircut Productions, Doug Berman, Benevolent Overlord, Philip Godeka writes our limericks,

our public address announcer is Paul Friedman, our tour manager is Shana Donald, thanks to the staff and crew working at the Studebaker Theater, BJ Lederman composed our theme, our program is produced by Jennifer Mills, Miles Dernbos, and Lillian King. Special thanks this week to Deanna Ortiz and Monica Hickey. Peter Gwynn rizzed up Baby Gronk.

Our vibe curator is Emma Choi. Technical direction is from Lorna White. Our CFO is Colin Miller. Our production manager is Robert Newhouse. Our senior producer is Ian Chilog. And the executive producer of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is Mike Danforth. Now, panel, what would be the next big news in game shows?

Faith Saley. Nick Cannon is back to host a show called Name That Child in which he attempts to recognize any of his 12 children. Adam Felber. The Apprentice Prison Edition. Karen Chee. All games will just be Dungeons and Dragons. Why not? Well, if any of that happens, we're going to ask you about it on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.

Thank you, Bill Curtis. Thanks also to Faith Saley, Adam Felber, Karen Chee. Thanks to all of you for listening. Thanks to our fabulous audience at the Studio Maker Theater. I am Peter Sagal, and we will see you next week. This is NPR.