Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! - WWDTM: Kristen Kish
Episode Date: February 3, 2024This week, Top Chef's Kristen Kish joins Josh Gondelman, Joyelle Nicole Johnson, and Brian Babylon to talk bivalves, airballs, and cheese curds. Get access to bonus episodes, sponsor-free listening, a...nd the chance to participate in a quiz with Peter Sagal when you sign up for Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!+ at plus.npr.org/waitwait.Learn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hi, I'm Jen White from 1A. I host a news show for those who need to know what's happening and why it matters, but we get it. The news can weigh you down. It's why we also make time for stories, guests, and surprises that'll lift you up. Listen to the 1A podcast from WAMU and NPR.
From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz.
Hey, Milwaukee, time to hear Bill talky.
I'm Bill Curtis, and here is your host at the Riverside Theater in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, Peter Sagan.
Thank you, Bill. Thank you, Bill.
Thank you, everybody.
Thank you so much.
It is so great to be able to come up to Milwaukee from our home in Chicago because I don't know if the rest of America has heard of this,
but move over, Bricklin.
Milwaukee is now hip.
I'll prove it. I'll prove it. The next season of the cooking competition show Top Chef was filmed right here because as we all know, the pinnacle of modern
cuisine is the cheese curd. We're going to go over all the different varieties you can get
with Kristen Kish, the new host of Top Chef,
who's come back to Milwaukee to be with us.
She'll be here in a little while, but first it's your turn
to try to be the top answerer.
Give us a call.
The number is 1-888-WAIT-WAIT.
That's 1-888-924-8924.
Let's welcome our first listener contestant. Hi,
you were on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Hi, this is Justin Scheidel from Staten Island, New York.
Staten Island? So, Staten Island has a reputation, certain stereotypes, which I will not get into
for fear of enraging everybody in Staten Island. Oh yeah, don't do that. Are they true? Is it a tough place?
It can be, but it's
New York City, so it's just
outside of New York City, but still New York City.
You realize that there are millions of
people in Manhattan and Brooklyn
who are saying right now, yeah, no.
And most of
those people have never gone to Staten Island
except to go to the mall. Exactly.
But let's not have that debate.
Instead, welcome to the show, Justin.
Let me introduce you to our panel.
First up, his fashion line, Bab Gooch, is launching April 13th at the Silver Room in Chicago,
premiering items from its L.L. Bean upcycling collab.
It's Brian Babylon.
It's Brian Babylon Next, a comedian whose album Yell Joy is streaming across all platforms
Joyelle Nicole Johnson
And a comedian whose free newsletter is called That's Marvelous
He's currently on tour across the U.S.
It's Josh Gondelman
Hello
So, Justin, welcome to the show. You're going to play Who's
Bill this time. Of course, Bill Curtis is going to start us off with three quotations from the
week's news. Your job, simply explain, identify two of them. Do that, you'll win our prize. The
voice of anyone you might choose on your voicemail. You ready to go? I am prepared to fail spectacularly.
That also works for us. That's that Staten Island confidence. Yeah, there you go.
Yeah, we all got it.
Yeah.
All right, your first quote is from a very excited Taylor Swift fan.
My reaction to this is literally not normal.
I need a lobotomy.
That Swifty was reacting to news that Taylor will be attending what big game next weekend?
The Super Bowl.
The Super Bowl, yes.
Last weekend's NFL playoff games were hard fought, very exciting.
They were dramatic, but we are happy to tell you that the team with the best boyfriend won.
It's truly, it is amazing.
It is the love story of the decade.
She's the biggest pop star in the world.
He's an NFL all-star, Travis Kelsey, or maybe it's Jason.
Nobody cares.
I'm happy for Travis because now he is what I consider Joyelle famous.
And that means the only way I know a sports person is if they're dating a pop star.
Really?
Yeah.
So now I know who Russell Wilson is.
Okay.
And Giselle's ex-husband.
Right.
Whatever his name is.
I don't remember his name.
Have you seen how they're trying to, like the Tucker Carlson people, are to spin her into like some Pentagon op.
Yeah, it's really weird and almost inexplicable,
but it's also true that the right-wing media
and some politicians think this whole thing,
the relationship, you know,
the team going to the Super Bowl,
it's all been engineered to give Taylor Swift
massive exposure and popularity
right before she endorses Biden.
They say even getting Kansas City into the Super Bowl was a Democratic plot,
which you know it wasn't because it worked.
I love that part of this plot is like,
finally, now Taylor Swift is popular.
Yeah, I know.
Oh, wow.
I do think she has a concert in Tokyo the night before.
She's leaving and getting in the night before.
Such is the power of Taylor Swift
that she's time traveling to the Super Bowl.
I know.
All right.
Here, Justin, is your next quote.
Control your phone or computer just by thinking.
That was Elon Musk on Monday.
He was touting what he says was a successful test of his new product,
and his new product is a microchip that is installed where?
In your brain.
In your brain, yes.
Elon Musk announced
that his company, Neuralink, has
successfully embedded a computer chip in a
human brain, allowing a seamless brain-machine
interface. The patient, who is
anonymous, is doing great, and he says
he's feeling totally one-zero-one-one-zero-one-zero-one-one.
If he were doing that great, he wouldn't be anonymous.
Yeah, that's true.
Exactly.
They'd be like, Steve's doing great.
Steve right over here who's standing next to me, quite alive, is doing great.
They're not saying that.
And what's scary is this chip, they tested this by implanting it in monkeys, and all
the monkeys died.
Well, on a long enough timeline, all the monkeys are going to die.
Exactly. Exactly. monkeys died. Well, on a long enough timeline, all the monkeys are going to die.
So what's amazing is like this happened and the knurling people are like,
well, I guess the problem is monkeys.
All our monkeys were defective.
Exactly.
Yeah, they couldn't cope.
Yeah.
I have a question about this.
You said that you can operate your computer or phone
by thinking about it.
Yes.
My question is, all the websites?
Well, yeah. One worry.
Are you asking for a friend?
What he says is yes, you can control computers
with your thoughts, right?
So it works like this.
You say to yourself, oh, I'm
feeling sick. You can just think
your question to WebMD
and every answer will be
well, it's probably the chip you had
jammed into your brain.
It's important
that you remember you only have to think.
You do not have to speak your commands.
When you walk into a party, don't be muttering
search friend's boyfriend's name.
But you know who's not going to like this?
Who? Siri?
She's pissed.
She's like, oh, you're just going to get somebody
else to do my job. You could just ask me, but now you're thinking? I mean, wow. I got to say this,
though. I mean, everybody's going to sign up for this because we all sign up for everything.
When you do this, get your own account. Do not steal your parents' password because you just
don't want to have to find out what they've been thinking. Right.
All right.
Justin, your last quote is from a marine archaeologist somewhat skeptical about a big find in the news this week.
All we know is it looks like a plane.
He was responding to an explorer claiming that he had found
whose plane that's been missing for about 80 years.
Amelia Earhart. That's right, Amelia
Earhart on Underwater Explorer. We have big Earhart fans here in Milwaukee. On Underwater Explorer
says that he has found Amelia Earhart's missing plane. Early analysis suggests that Ms. Earhart
crashed when she was flying back from her concert in Tokyo to see her boyfriend play football.
when she was flying back from her concert in Tokyo to see her boyfriend play football.
So does this mean they found her body, too?
No, no.
There is some skepticism,
because all this guy has presented
is this real blurry sonar image
that looks, according to independent experts,
kind of airplane-y.
Skeptics say they will need a lot more proof,
like a clear image of a tail number in the plane
or the ghost of Earhart telling us the name of her elementary school
and her mother's maiden name.
Listen, I love this news.
I'm a big fan of a lot more men just going to the bottom of the ocean
and maybe never coming back.
Well, I've known you for years.
What are we doing to you?
Now, this happened, of course, back in 1937,
and those were the days in which you were declared missing
the second you safely took off in an airplane.
Oh, they're never coming back.
They're never coming back.
That can't be working.
You were missing once you left the house back then.
You're just like, oh, he's probably at war, one of them.
Yeah.
Bill, how did Justin do in our quiz?
Justin made change the image of Staten Island. He was perfect. Yay. Yay. Yeah. Bill, how did Justin do in our quiz? Justin may change the image of Staten Island.
He was perfect. The Wu-Tang Clan is so proud of you. Oh, yeah. They live, like, actually right
around the block. There you go. We'll go over and say hello. Justin, thank you so much for playing.
And thank you so much for playing.
Of course.
Take care.
Right now, guys, it is time for you to answer some questions about this week's news.
Brian, data released from Nielsen this week reveals that last year, 2023, Americans collectively spent 21 million years doing what?
Watching.
Yes.
Yeah.
Just say.
Reality shows?
Well, yes, that.
Watching TV.
Watching streaming services.
21 million years of human life.
Wait, 21 million?
21 million years.
21 million years.
Dinosaur amounts.
Yeah.
Researchers assess data released by streaming services,
and they basically added it all up, and they found that U.S. consumers, i.e., well, us,
collectively watched 21 million years worth of content
on the streaming services.
That is a 21% increase over the prior year.
And that is crazy.
21 million years.
Especially the whole universe has only existed for 6,000.
Right.
I do think you have to rewrite that song from Rent.
That's like, how do you measure a year?
And now it's just like, 600,000 episodes of The Office.
Exactly.
And that was pretty much all I did.
You know the number?
525,600 minutes.
Wow!
I did high school theater.
Yeah, yeah.
Wow, okay.
The real question is, if we spend that much time, 21 million years, watching stuff on Netflix,
how much time do we spend deciding what to watch on Netflix?
22 million years.
Right, exactly. 22 million years. Exactly.
It's me on my TV.
We get along all right.
Me on my TV.
I can watch you every night.
Coming up, a Floridian mystery solved in our Bluff the Listener game.
Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT-TO-PLAY. We'll be back in a minute with more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPR.
It can be hard nowadays to find a space where we're able to listen to each other,
where we can agree to disagree.
It's why I'm proud of 1A, a show that's made for you and by you. We're not about snark. We're about dialogue.
Join the discussion and me, your host, Jen White,
by listening to the 1A podcast from WAMU and NPR.
The day's top headlines, local stories from your community, your next podcast binge listen.
You can have it all in one place, your pocket. Download the NPR app today.
Do you want in on a secret? Like why your favorite pop star is so popular?
Or why a makeup fad is suddenly sweeping your feed?
It's that none of these things happen by accident.
On the It's Been a Minute podcast, I don't just tell you what's trending.
I dig deeper to find out why.
Join me, Brittany Luce, on It's Been a Minute from NPR.
What does it mean that Trump's mugshot recalls Paris Hilton's?
What does the fake resume of George Santos tell us about American myths?
What if I told you that the Kardashians are the new Kennedys?
On It's Been a Minute, I give you fresh ways of thinking about what's going on.
Listen every week to It's Been a Minute from NPR. Okay, it is a lot like that, because we're trying to get 401 new Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me Plus supporters just in the month of February.
Now, I know you've probably heard me talk about Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me Plus, but you haven't signed up yet.
And I gotta tell you, it kind of bothers me. So why haven't you?
Well, not only do you get to listen to the show without any sponsor breaks, but you also get bonus episodes every other week.
also get bonus episodes every other week. You can even get the chance
to be in one of our bonus
episodes and play a quiz game with me
and some of the crew from Wait
Wait. And maybe most
importantly, you will be supporting us here
at NPR and Wait Wait Don't Tell Me.
Help us keep on doing what we
love and sign up for Wait Wait Don't Tell Me
Plus today. And sign up your friends too.
Go to plus.npr.org
slash waitwaitnow and become one of our favorite 401 fans.
And a big thanks to everybody who has already signed up.
From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz.
I'm Bill Curtis.
We're playing this week with Joyelle Nicole Judson,
Joss Gundelman, and Brian Babylon.
And here again is your host at the Riverside Theater
in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, Peter Sabo.
Thank you, Bill.
Thanks, everybody.
Right now it is time for the Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me bluff,
the listener game.
Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to play our game on the air
or check out the pinned post on our Instagram page at WaitWaitNPR.
Hi, you are on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.
Hi, this is Lisa from Indianapolis.
Hey, Indianapolis, an amazing and beautiful city
where I've spent some time.
What do you do there? I am a pharmacist. You are a pharmacist. Okay. I have a question for you.
Whenever I get, I pick up some medicine at the pharmacy, they always say,
do you have any questions for the pharmacist? And I always say, well, no, thank you.
pharmacist. And I always say, well, no, thank you. Does anybody ever say yes? What am I supposed to do with this pill? Yes, we actually do get a lot of people with questions. I would appreciate people
asking questions, actually. Really? And what are the questions like? So, get me a bottle of pills.
Am I just supposed to chug it just all at once, you know, like a shooter? You'd be surprised.
Well, Lisa, welcome to the show.
You're going to play our game in which you must try to tell truth from fiction.
Bill, what is Lisa's topic?
Tampa, city of mystery.
Tampa, Florida has its share of mysteries.
How did it get the name Cigar City?
What role did it play in the Civil War?
And can I trust everything I'm reading right now on Tampa's Wikipedia page?
This week, a persistent mystery in Tampa was finally solved by dogged detective work.
Our panelists are going to tell you about it.
Pick the one, though, who is telling the truth.
You'll win the weight-waiter of your choice on your voicemail.
You ready to play?
Yes, I am.
First, let's hear from Joyelle Nicole Johnson.
When all the party barges at Tampa Bay's Wild Willie's Party Barges
were rented out for spring break by the Robbins family, the
company was thrilled. And the excitement continued when the Robbins clan booked all of the beach
cabanas at Crazy Carrie's Beach Cabanas. But then the Robbinses said they would need to pre-purchase
every single jello shot at Lunatic Larry's Libation Lounge. Business owners started to wonder,
who are these Robbins? and how many of them were
there? After inquiries, phone calls, and internet searches, the head of the Robins family was tracked
down by a reporter and she confessed, okay, we are not a huge spring break family reunion. We aren't
even a family. We're bird watchers. Turns out spring break coincides with the spring migration
and a group of local birders decided that this time, whatever the cost,
the lab party would not scare away their birds.
This year, I will see the yellow-breasted night hare on, said bird watcher Leslie Turner,
and win the wet t-shirt contest.
A group of birders books everything there is to do in Tampa during spring break
just to keep it quiet for the birds.
Your next story of a Tampa enigma comes from Brian Babylon.
For weeks, clothing stores across Tampa, Florida have been confounded by mystery.
The mystery? How did all the mannequins suddenly get hair? And why is the hair so ugly?
suddenly get hair and why is the hair so ugly? One by one all the mannequins in Tampa start sporting wigs with identical horrible haircuts. The mystery was
finally solved when Matt Berry was spotted at a grocery store with the
exact same haircut. Why? According to Matt I was going through a hard time. So instead of fixing my problem, I got bangs.
And then that didn't fix anything, and I just kept going.
So Matt decided to try and make it hip and cool
by giving all the mannequins in Tampa the exact same haircut.
He apologizes to the citizens of Tampa
and the mannequins for putting them through this.
He promises from now on, he'll just wear a hat.
A man sneaks in and puts wigs on all the mannequins
and stories trying to make his own terrible haircut look cool.
And your final story of a Tampa whodunit
comes from Josh Gombelman.
Since 2021, a mysterious thrumming sound has been disturbing residents of a neighborhood
in Tampa, Florida. An amateur investigation conducted by locals ruled out any of the
typical causes for a Tampa-based cacophony, which are, of course, unlicensed Jimmy Buffett cover band,
alligator bat mitzvah and Haunted Strip Club.
So the residents decided to bring in an expert.
James Lacascio of the Mote Marine Laboratory and Aquarium in Sarasota
has gotten to the bottom of the issue.
He believes the offending sound
is caused by mating fish,
specifically black drumfish.
This species grows up to five and a half feet long,
but they frequently say they're 5'10 on Grouper,
the dating app for bottom-feeding sea creatures.
Black drumfish are known for producing a low-frequency humming noise
during mating season, which can last deep into the winter night,
showing off much black drumfish.
Humans, of course, do not create a similarly rhythmic
thrumming sound during mating, which is why to compensate,
we as a species invented
boys to men's greatest hits.
All right.
So,
the good people of Tampa, Florida
now know something
that they didn't know before.
Is it from
Joyelle that the Robbins family that
booked everything in town during spring break
turns out just to be a bunch of birders
who wanted things to be quiet for once?
From Brian Babylon, the reason that all these weird wigs
were appearing on mannequins was just a desperate man
trying to make his own haircut look good.
Or from Josh Goleman, that terrible deep thrumming sound
keeping everybody at night?
Fish sex.
Which of these is the real story of a Tampa mystery solved?
I think I'm going to go with Joyelle's birder story.
You're going to go with the story of Joyelle's story about a group of birders who called up and booked everything in Tampa
so it would be quiet.
Well, to bring you the real story,
we spoke to a reporter who covered it.
A resident reported hearing kind of these strange, deep vibrating sounds.
Scientists believe it's a fish meeting, very loudly.
That was the New York Post's Patrick Riley
talking about what turned out to be the beautiful sounds of fish love.
I'm sorry,
Lisa, but in fact,
as we desperately tried to tell you,
Josh had the real answer.
But I still get a point, though.
You do get a point. You set out
to earn a point for Joyelle.
Turn up.
You did it, because she gets a point.
Thank you so much for playing.
I'm still going to do her voicemail whether she likes it or not.
And it's going to say, thanks for nothing.
This is Lisa's part.
Thanks for playing.
And now it's time for the game we call Not My Job.
When Padma Lakshmi retired as the host of the competition show Top Chef last year,
there was only one candidate.
The producers of that show wanted to replace her,
and that was Kristen Kish,
the come-from-behind winner of Top Chef Season 10,
who since then has become a superstar in the food world.
Her first season as host broadcasts this spring, and since it is all set in Milwaukee and around
Wisconsin, we are delighted she came back here to join us.
Kristen Kish, welcome to Wait, Wait, Don't Call Me.
Thank you.
It is such a pleasure to see you.
First of all, congratulations on the host gig.
So let's jump right in.
You won your season of Top Chef after fighting your way through a redemption round.
And the big turning point for you in the show was you were all challenged to prepare this
seafood specialty in Seattle, the gooey duck.
Correct.
And I don't know if I will ever recover watching.
Okay, who knows what a gooey duck is?
You guys don't?
Yes?
Yeah, no?
It sounds like pate or something.
Who knows what a penis is?
They look identical.
It is not the thing that I wanted to cook
and have my first moment dunking the
gooey duck in hot water to then remove the...
Boar skin?
Yes.
Yes, I'll let you say that.
And to slide it off.
And that was my first moment.
But it was the quickest thing that you could cook in 30 minutes.
Wait, so you moiled a...
Wow!
What a follow!
Beautiful.
It's a very easy procedure. You do that, you give it a fountain pen,
and you move on.
And I...
I'm very gay, so shocking that I knew
what to do.
Yes!
That makes sense, though,
that you're like a penis dipping in boiling water.
I think that's the advantage you had over the rest of the contestants.
Yeah, exactly.
Complete emotional detachment.
I don't care.
I don't care.
So now, so you went to be one top chef, hugely popular winner.
You've gone on to do a lot of things.
And then they called you up and they said, Padma's retiring. We want you to take over the show. Well, so they didn't even say that.
I saw anyone that is a fan of the show saw that on Instagram when Padma posted it. And it was like,
it caught me off guard too. I was like, who's going to take over that job? Not me. Certainly.
It's probably going to be one of you. You all are very funny and clever and very witty and charming.
I did think it was going to be me, so this is awkward.
And it just happened so fast. I got a call. I was flying from Thailand back to New York,
and I was in Dubai, and I got a call from my agent, and it just, things started rolling.
And how did you find the, of course, necessary moment at the end of every episode where someone
has to go home.
Do you use the famous catchphrase,
pack your knives and go?
Oh, pack your knives and go is still there.
You are Top Chef is still there.
They have been there since season one.
You didn't change it?
You weren't like, f*** off?
Well, I did.
You did? No.
Did you pitch your own?
The first day I was like,
maybe what if I do just say,
go the f*** home?
Yeah, really? Yeah. But I felt like, I was like, there's a lot of people I don't want to say that to, so I was like, maybe what if I do just say, go the f*** home? Yeah. Really?
Yeah.
But I felt like, I was like, there's a lot of people I don't want to say that to.
So I was like, you know, I'll be nice to everybody.
So we can't tell, you know.
You are.
You are a very positive person.
You filmed the next season of Top Chef.
Will take place entirely here in Milwaukee and other areas of Wisconsin.
Chefs from all over the country flew here to compete.
And how many episodes were there? Are there? I have no idea. You know,
a lot of episodes. So like 20 episodes. How many of them are entirely about cheese curds?
As soon as we touched down, I had cheese curds, custard, butter burger. And I know Wisconsin is much more than just your dairy,
but your dairy is exceptional.
It's true.
And most people don't know this,
but when you arrive at Mitchell Airport in Milwaukee,
you are greeted with strings of cheese curds
that they place around your neck as a traditional welcome here.
It's very nice.
And in Wisconsin, your dairy is exceptional, qualifies as dirty talk.
Well, Kristen Kish, we are so delighted you came back to Milwaukee to join us,
and we have asked you here specifically to play our competition,
and this time we are calling it...
Top Chef Meet the Top Jeff.
This time we are calling it Top Chef Meet the Top Jeff.
You host Top Chef, so we thought we'd ask you about the world's top Jeff, Jeff Bezos.
Answer two out of three questions correctly about the founder of Amazon,
and you will win our prize for one of our listeners,
the voice of anyone they might choose for their voicemail.
So, Bill, who is Chef Kish playing for? Heather Rayne of Racine, Wisconsin.
Did you get down to Racine while you were here?
Get a Kringle?
I can't say anything.
Oh, I'm sorry.
You can't.
It's all secret.
Sorry.
But also, if I lose, does Heather still get the prize?
Because this is a lot of pressure for me.
I want to do good for somebody else.
And then if I don't do good and then she doesn't get the prize,
I'm going to feel really bad for the rest of my life.
Here we go.
Let's see how you do.
Here's your first question.
To demonstrate his personal philosophy of how one succeeds in business,
Jeff Bezos once did what?
A, actually stole candy from a baby.
B, ate an octopus for breakfast.
baby, B, ate an octopus for breakfast, or C, drove his Mercedes S-Class the wrong way down I-5 in Seattle?
Oh, God.
See, I was really bad at quizzes, and I always did C when I didn't know the answer, but there's
only...
He ate the octopus.
He ate the octopus.
That's right.
There you go.
See, you know what's crazy? Get back in your head. You do it right. Right you go. See, you know what's crazy?
Get back in your head.
Right.
Right.
You think you know the answer, and then you...
Talk yourself out of it.
Someone once asked me at a food and wine festival, side note, you know, Le Creuset, Le Creuset,
the cookware.
Someone was like, how do you say Le Creuset?
And I've been saying Le Creuset the right way my entire life.
And someone goes, how do you say it?
And I was like, have I been saying it wrong?
And I go, Le Creuset?
And they're like, no. This is what happens. I overthink. I overthink. So what happened was, is he ate
this octopus for breakfast at breakfast with
the head of a company he wanted to acquire. And then Bezos said, and I quote,
you are the octopus I'm having for breakfast. When I look at the menu,
you're the thing I don't understand,
the thing I've never had.
I must have the breakfast octopus.
That was Bond villain.
It really was.
Wow.
All right.
Here's your next question.
Jeff Bezos is not the only famous member of his family.
His biological father, Ted Jorgensen, also had a claim to fame.
What? A, he was the most beloved small independent bookstore owner in Seattle until Amazon put him
out of business. B, he invented the male cosmetic buttock implant. Or C, he was an avid unicyclist who founded the world's first unicycle hockey club.
Does C qualify as a claim to fame?
I personally like B. I like the thought of white men getting BBLs.
A.
A. No, I thought I told you. The answer is always C.
Wait, how many do I have to get right? Two?
You have to get two. Okay. This is just like Top Chef. This is too much pressure. You lost, but you're not out of chances. The answer is always C. Wait, how many do I have to get right? Two? You have to get two.
Okay.
This is just like Top Chef.
This is too much pressure.
You lost, but you're not out of chances.
You can come back and win it all.
You know how I do well under pressure?
I don't do very well.
What happened in high school once is I was a really great free throw basketball person.
They threw me on the team because I was tall for my age.
It's not because I was actually good.
But I got really good at just aiming and standing in one spot.
Right.
So then what happened is there was a game.
We're playing our rivals.
Right.
And it was tied game.
Like everything that you think of, like when you see something really suspenseful in a sports game, that's what's happening.
All right, let's go.
Tied game with this team rival.
Right.
You're fouled.
Game's in the line.
You're at the free throw line.
Yes.
Go.
And I go, whoop, at the free throw line. Go.
And I go, whoop, and it air balled.
Oh.
It was devastating.
Devastating.
So this is how I feel now.
So go ahead, ask your question.
Ask your question.
Come on, triggers.
All right.
Here's your last question.
Get this right, you win.
I think I'm ready.
I'm ready.
You get this one right, you win.
So Jeff Bezos is famous for insulting his employees whenever they displease him, which apparently they do a lot.
Which of these is a real insult that Jeff Bezos has been reported
to shout at his underlings?
A, I'm sorry, did I take my stupid pills today?
B, if I hear that again, I'm going to have to
kill myself. Or C,
why are you wasting my life?
Well, C.
C? Yeah. C. Yeah, C.
C. You're going to go with C.
All of them. All of them.
All of them.
All of them is the correct answer.
Wow!
For the win!
I have had a lot of wonderful people on the show. is the correct answer. Wow! Whoa! For the win! Yes! For the win!
I have had a lot of wonderful people in the show.
I've never been on such an emotional journey with any of them.
But hey, it's no, wait a minute.
The demon has not vanished until Bill says the words.
Bill, how did Kristin Kish do in our show?
Two out of three.
You won!
Yay!
Oh my God.
Kristin Kish is a Top Chef winner and the show's new host. three. You won. Oh my god.
Kristen Kish is a Top Chef winner and the show's new
host. The latest season filmed
in Milwaukee will air on Bravo this spring.
Kristen Kish, thank you so much for joining us.
Thank you.
Thank you.
In just a minute,
the truth about your toilet lid.
In our listener limerick challenge call, 1-888-WAIT-WAIT to join us on the air.
We'll be back in a minute with more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPR.
From your car radio to your smart speaker, NPR meets you where you are in a lot of different ways.
Now we're in your pocket. Download the NPR app today.
Planet Money helps you understand the economy. We introduce you to fascinating people.
We did not have a trash can.
No, ma'am.
Didn't need one.
We show you how money influences everything.
Tell me what you like by telling me how you spend your money.
And we dig until we get answers.
I had a bad feeling you were going to bring that up.
Planet Money finds out.
All you have to do is listen. The Planet Money Podcast from NPR.
The economy can sometimes feel like a big, scary wilderness
filled with jargon and unreadable charts.
The Planet Money Podcast is here to help.
We love spreadsheets.
Yeah, let us be your guide to the global economy.
We brought snacks.
Is that trail mix?
It's actually gorp.
That's Planet Money from NPR.
From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me, the NPR News Quiz.
I'm Bill Curtis.
We're playing this week with Josh Gundelman, Brian Babylon, and Joelle Nicole Johnson.
And here again is your host at the Riverside Theater in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, Peter Stegall.
Thank you, everybody. Thank you, everybody.
In just a minute, Bill opens up a tall boy of Milwaukee's best limericks in our Listener Limerick Challenge game.
If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT.
That's 1-888-924-8924.
Right now, panel, some more questions for you from the week's news.
Josh, a new report in the Washington Post says you no longer need to be ashamed if you happen to have a chair in your bedroom just for what?
to have a chair in your bedroom just for what?
Looking out the window?
Can I have a hint, please?
First of all, everybody's got this,
but really organized people have a lights chair and a colors chair.
Oh, a chair just for laundry.
Exactly, a chair for your laundry, right?
Yes.
You all have it. Every single person listening to me right now, you got a chair with a pile of all the clothes you wore last week.
And if you're saying, ha, ha, ha, I don't have a laundry chair. Well, then how's your laundry
treadmill? But here's the great news, everybody. The Washington Post tells us that instead of
being ashamed of that increasingly
smelly pile, you should embrace it. You're not a lazy slob. You are taking an intermediate step
towards completing an important household chore. If just piling your dirty laundry in a chair in
the corner rather than cleaning it is in fact a positive step, then why isn't that true for
everything? It's like, no, honey, I didn't clean the step, then why isn't that true for everything?
It's like, no, honey, I didn't clean the kitchen,
but take a look at the dish chair.
I didn't finish eating dinner,
but I do have quite a lot of chicken pot pie in my mouth.
Exactly. Kind of Pelican style.
Yeah, that's good.
Joyelle, everybody in the office who resents you
is going to have to apologize
because according to the experts
at the cooking section of the New York Times,
the best, most foolproof way
to cook fish is what?
First of all, I don't know about offices
because I don't have a job.
The answer is microwave.
Yes, microwave your fish, everyone.
If anyone
complains, say the paper
of record told you to.
The New York Times food section says,
if you want perfectly prepared fish done easily, you should cook it in the microwave.
Peter, I think you did that one time back when we worked together at WBZ.
I did not.
Honestly, I...
I did not.
The person who did it was our producer, Jennifer Mills,
and her name shall live in infamy.
Wow!
Have I forgiven her?
That scarred me.
I know.
I get the concept.
I get it.
Put that in the broom closet.
What?
Like, take the microwave,
put it in the broom closet,
do your fish,
and it's just a microwave
for fish in the broom closet.
But you gotta open the broom closet. Yeah, I know, but it's back there. It's not in the common area where the broom closet. But you've got to open the broom closet.
Yeah, I know, but it's back there.
It's not in the common area where people are eating.
Brian's right, though.
The recipe, they should say in the cooking section,
the best place to cook fish is in the microwave at your house.
At your house.
At your house, not in the common workspace.
Brian, Nikki Haley is still out there in the Republican primary for president,
and she is touting her ability to bring change.
And one big change she did make, according to her own memoir, was when she changed what?
Her name?
Not her name.
Her parents' name?
Not her parents. Member of her family.
Husbands.
Her husband's name, when she changed her husband's name when she changed her husband's
name. That's right. When Haley first started dating her husband, William, that was his name
when they met, she looked at him and said, you don't look like a William. Your name is Michael
now. And thus, now, his name is Michael. This does seem weird, but Nikki should be allowed to do what she wants
after rescuing her husband from that kill shelter.
I like that she changed her name from ethnic to white
and she changed his name from white to whiter.
Right, exactly.
It is fascinating to see this is what a Republican means
when they say they believe in a woman's right to choose.
Coming up, it's lightning fill in the blank,
but first it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme.
If you'd like to play on air, call or leave a message at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT.
That's 1-888-924-8924.
Also, you can check out our Instagram to find behind-the-scenes photos and videos
and a bunch of other fun stuff that's, frankly, way better than our radio show.
Come on.
And it's easier to absorb.
It's at WAIT-WAIT-NPR.
Hi, you're on WAIT-WAIT-DON'T-TELL-ME.
Hi, this is Megan.
I'm calling from Somerville, Massachusetts. I happen to know and love Somerville. What do you do there? I am a
software engineer who works from home, so I spend most of my day
trying to keep my cats from lighting the place on fire.
Are your cats
running around with oil-soaked rags and matches?
I mean...
Peter, you haven't been to Somerville in a while.
Apparently, yeah.
It's got tough.
Terrifying.
Well, welcome to the show, Megan.
Bill Curtis is going to read you three news-related limericks
with the last word or phrase missing from each.
If you can fill in that last word or phrase correctly
and two of the limericks will be a winner,
here is your first limerick.
As attendance to baseball games dips,
our home openers flipping the scripts.
We think it's a sign that the planets align.
It's the time of the solar...
Eclipse?
Eclipse, yes.
The Cleveland Guardians opening baseball game
will be in the direct path of the total solar eclipse later this year.
It could be the most exciting thing to happen in baseball since the invention of the t-shirt gun. But instead of embracing it
with promotions like, you know, watch our team spread darkness over all the earth,
the front office says they might reschedule the game. I know, it's crazy. They could literally
have taken credit for being the Cleveland Guardians of the Galaxy. Yes!
could literally have taken credit for being the Cleveland Guardians of the Galaxy. Yes!
It's going to be awesome to go to a game with an eclipse. How great will it be to heckle the umpires? Hey ump, did you ignore the advice of experts and still directly at the eclipse or what?
Here is your next limit. As new parents, we're doing our clever best, but we found that our toddler will never rest.
So we're making him climb way past his bedtime.
Here we are at our base camp on...
Everest?
Everest, yes.
A Scottish couple is defending their controversial decision to go visit base camp at Mount Everest with their two-year-old son.
They say they took every safety precaution, and they also tell us that he was completely excited
for the challenge because he's a, quote, energizer bunny. And, oh my God, he loves seeing dead bodies.
Now, before, like I said, don't get too impressed. They didn't take the two-year-old to the summit.
They just went to the Everest Base Camp, which is just 17,000 feet above sea level.
And they got all this attention.
I, on the other hand, took two kids under four to a restaurant on Wednesday and survived,
and nobody is covering that.
Most parents just give their kids melatonin.
These kids deprive the kid of oxygen.
Did they not?
I'll see what suckers you out.
It's also, like, maybe they didn't mean to do it, right?
Maybe the sitter canceled and they're like,
well, these reservations don't transfer.
Yeah, that's true.
Bring the kid.
Bring the kid. It's going to be fine. And not only is it dangerous to bring a two-year-old
way up the side of a Himalayan peak, it's pointless. In case you get in trouble,
there's hardly any meat on him. Here is your last limerick. From your toilet bowl, germs always gush.
So take care where you keep your good brush. For lid up or lid down, spray still gets around.
Things get icky whenever you...
Flush.
Flush, yes.
A study in the American Journal of Infection Control,
famously the magazine with publishing's worst swimsuit issue,
says contrary to what everybody believes to be true, closing the lid on your
toilet before you flush does nothing, nothing to prevent the spread of germs in your bathroom.
You have to do what I do and throw your whole body across the toilet like it's a live grenade.
So here's the thing. If you think about it, you realize this. A toilet seat, a toilet lid,
does not seal the bowl. It's got openings around the side.
Basically, fumes.
Well, no.
Think about a toilet seat.
They've got those little sort of stops that keep it from flapping into it.
And those hold up the lid so there are openings around the side.
So when you lower it and flush, basically closing the lid just makes the germs shoot out sideways really fast
instead of just floating upwards.
And if you listen very carefully, you can hear all the bacteria going, yee-haw!
I know.
Now I start thinking about a new Pixar movie of a family of germs that were in the toilet,
but now they're on your brush.
Then they go to work with you, and they make you do better at work.
That's a cool germ.
Hey, we wrote a movie, y'all.
Yeah, I've got a good name for your Pixar movie.
Ready?
Rat-a-pooey.
Okay.
Bill, how did Megan do on our quiz?
Great.
Three in a row.
It's amazing.
Megan, thank you so much for playing.
Thanks, Peter. Bye-bye.
Thank you. I know if this is not right, there's something in the air tonight.
At Planet Money, we take you to the furthest reaches of the global economy. From the currency black markets of Buenos Aires, to the Caribbean island where no one owns property,
to the giant underground caves where the U.S. government stored a national cheese supply.
Cheese cave!
Listen to the Planet Money podcast from NPR.
On It's Been a Minute,
we talk to up-and-comers
and icons of culture.
From Barbra Streisand.
You're such a wonderful interviewer.
To Tracee Ellis Ross.
Your questions were so wonderful.
And Christine Baranski.
Oh, thank you for your wonderful questions.
Here are the questions
these icons loved to be asked.
Listen every week
to It's Been a Minute from NPR.
Up first achieves the rare one-two punches of being short and thorough,
national and international, fact-based and personable.
Every morning, we take the three biggest stories of the day and explain why they matter.
And we do it all in less than 15 minutes.
So you can start your day a little more in the know than when you went to sleep.
Listen now to the Up First podcast from NPR.
Now it's time for our final game, Lightning Fill in the Blank.
Each of our players left 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill in the blank questions as they can.
Each correct answer now worth two points.
Bill, can you give us the scores?
Brian and Joyelle each have three.
Josh has two.
Oh, Josh has two.
Okay, Josh, that means you are going first.
Okay.
The clock will start when I begin your first question.
Fill in the blank.
On Thursday, the EU agreed to a 50 billion euro fund to help support blank.
Ukraine.
Right.
At a Senate hearing on Wednesday, Meta CEO blank promised that the company was working
to make social media safer for teens and kids.
Mark Zuckerberg.
Yes.
According to a new report, blank spent over 50 million dollars in campaign contributions on his kids. Mark Zuckerberg. Yes. According to a new report, Blank spent over $50 million in campaign contributions on his
legal fees.
Donald Trump.
Yes.
And Wednesday, the FBI warned that hackers from Blank pose a grave threat to U.S. infrastructure.
China?
Yes.
After eight months in prison, police in India have released a Blank that was believed to
be a Chinese spy.
A horse?
Close.
A pigeon.
On Wednesday, Mike McDonald was announced as the new head coach of the Seattle Blank.
Seahawks.
Yes.
For the first time ever, a videographer captured the birth of a great white blank.
Shark?
Yes.
This week, a woman in New Jersey has asked for the public's help in finding the vandals who covered her house with blank.
They did like a big peekaboo over the windows.
No.
The vandals covered her house and car with hundreds of slices of pepperoni.
The New Jersey-est crime.
It really is.
Heather Doherty thought she was still dreaming when she woke up to find
that someone had covered her entire house with slices of pepperoni.
She's now just hoping someone will come back and vandalize her house further with cheese and tomato sauce with mushrooms just in the front porch.
Please.
Bill, how did Josh do in our quiz?
I think pretty well.
Yeah.
Six right.
Twelve more points.
Total of 14 puts him in the lead.
All righty then.
Okay.
I'm going to arbitrarily choose Brian to go next.
Brian, here we go. Fill in the blank. On Tuesday,
House Republicans voted to advance
impeachment articles against the Secretary of
Blank. Homeland Security.
Homeland Security, yes. On Thursday,
Defense Secretary Blank apologized for his
secretive hospital stay. Lloyd Austin. Yes.
Following a request from Israel, the U.S.
pulled its funding for the main U.N. aid agency
in blank. In Gaza.
Yes.
On Wednesday, Margot Robbie said she's fine not being nominated for her performance in blank.
Bobby.
Yes.
This week, a man was arrested for stealing blank from a Florida restaurant.
Man, are you kidding?
No, a three-and-a-half-foot-tall Snoop Dogg bubblehead.
On Thursday, seven-time blank champion Lewis Hamilton announced he is leaving his team Mercedes next year.
Formula One?
Yep.
This week, a South Carolina couple missed out on having a video of their engagement
after their friend who was supposed to film it blanked.
Oh, that guy?
He was arrested.
No, their friend who was filming it turned to film an adorable raccoon instead.
The groom-to-be was just about to get down on one knee
when his friend filming the proposal
got distracted by this cute raccoon over there.
And if that weren't bad enough,
when the camera woman gives her maid of honor speech at the wedding,
the whole thing is going to be
about how much she just loves that raccoon.
Bill, how did Brian do in our quiz?
At five rights, ten more points,
total of 13.
You're one short, Brian.
Always. How many, then, does
Joyelle need to win?
Six to win. Oh, boy.
Here we go, Joyelle. This is for the games, for all the marbles.
Oh, no! All the cheese,
as they say here. Here we go.
Fill in the blank. On Wednesday, a judge dismissed
Disney's lawsuit against Florida Governor
Blank. That's the answer. Yes. On Tuesday,
France passed a bill aimed at enshrining Blank rights in the country's
constitution.
Abortion.
Yes.
This week, the health ministry in South Korea sent out an advisory urging people to please
not eat Blank.
Chicken.
No deep fried toothpicks.
Thanks to a pair of atmospheric rivers, over 20 million people in Blank faced flood warnings
this week.
India.
California.
On Tuesday, a new study found that insects
are not actually attracted to blank.
Women.
What a surprise.
No, light.
This week, a dentist's office in Minneapolis
announced a new way to help their anxious patients.
To anyone who requests it,
they will put a blank in their lap.
A puppy?
Yes!
Well, to be fair,
it is a dog, but it is an 80-pound adult
dog. Oh my god.
That's a lead vest dog. Yeah, I know.
If you're worried about going to the
dentist, then just head to Minneapolis and meet
Ollie, the 80-pound golden doodle who will
climb up in the dentist chair and sprawl across you while they do the procedure.
He is not bothered by the sound of the equipment or the fuss, which makes him much better for the patients than their last dog who was trained to bark at cavities.
Bill, did Joyelle do well enough to win?
Joyelle got three right for six more points, total of nine.
That means Josh is this week's champion.
There you go.
In just a minute, we're going to ask our panelists to predict
after Amelia Earhart's playing,
what would be the next amazing discovery we make on the bottom of the ocean.
But first, let me tell you all,
Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is a production of NPR and WBEZ Chicago
in association with Urgent
Haircut Productions, Doug Berman, Benevolent
Overlord, Philip Godeka writes our limericks, our public
address announcer is Paul Friedman, our tour manager
is Shana Donald.
BJ Lederman composed our theme, our program is
produced by Jennifer Mills, Miles Dornbos, and Lillian
King. Special thanks to Blythe Roberson,
Monica Hickey, and Vinnie Thomas.
Peter Gwynn is the thing I don't understand, the thing
I've never had. He is the breakfast octopus.
Our vibe curator is Emma Choi.
Technical direction is from Lorna White.
Our CFO is Colin Miller.
Our production manager is Robert Newhouse.
Our senior producer is Ian Chilog,
and the executive producer of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me
is Mr. Michael Danforth.
Now, panel, what will we find next
on the bottom of the ocean?
Brian Babylon.
Tons of SpongeBob SquarePants dirty laundry
sitting in a chair.
Joyelle Nicole Johnson.
The script for a better finale to The Sopranos.
Whoa.
Smell You and Josh Gondelman.
A submersible aircraft full of billionaires
trying to visit Amelia Earhart's plane.
Well, if any of that happens, we'll ask you about it on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.
Thank you, Bill Curtis.
Thanks also to Brian Babylon, Joe Nicole Johnson, and Josh Goleman.
Thanks to Matt Berringer and the staff and crew at the Riverside Theater here in Milwaukee.
Thanks to all of you for listening.
Get home wherever you may be.
I'm Peter Sagal. We'll see you next week.
Eww!
This is NPR. When Argentina won the World Cup, it meant so much to so many people. But there's one person
in particular for whom it meant everything. Soccer legend Lionel Messi. In The Last Cup,
a bilingual podcast series, I explore why. Listen now to The Last Cup podcast from NPR and Futuro
Studios. NPR brings you the updates you need on the day's biggest headlines.
The Senate narrowly passed the debt ceiling bill
that will prevent the country from defaulting on its loans.
Stories from across the world.
Knowing how to forage and to live with the land is integral to a nice culture.
And down your block.
From CPR News, this is Colorado Matters.
And you can find all of that and more in your pocket.
Download the NPR app today.