Watch What Crappens - #141: OC, Melbourne, NJ, Below Deck, Crowns and Matt Whitfield!

Episode Date: August 20, 2014

Matt Whitfield (Yahoo TV) reunites with Ben Mandelker (bsideblog.com) and Ronnie Karam (trashtalktv.com) for a super-sized episode of "Watch What Crappens." The crew tackles all the Housewives of the week: Melbourne, New Jersey, and Orange County, and also finds time to dig into cult favorite "Game of Crowns." Plus, there's talk of "Below Deck" and a bonus "Big Brother" discussion at the end of the episode. Enjoy! And remember to like us on Facebook: http://facebook.com/watchwhatcrappens Use the promocode 199wwc for a new .com or domain transfer for just $1.99 at http://godaddy.com! Some limitations apply. See website for details. Yay! And here's some other stuff: Our YouTube Podcasts: http://www.youtube.com/thetvclique Our Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/watch-what-crappens On iTunes: https://bit.ly/crappens Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/watchwhatcrappens Ronnie on the Web: http://www.trashtalktv.com Ronnie on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/trashtalkteevee Ronnie on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/trashtalktv Ben on the Web: http://www.bsideblog.com Ben on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/bsideblog Ben on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/bsideblog See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

From Wondery and Audible comes Class of 88, a new podcast hosted by Will Smith. Before 1988, a lot of people didn't take hip-hop seriously. But hip-hop today touches everything from film to fashion to sports. So what changed? Follow Class of 88 wherever you get your podcasts. Put your website to work while you play. A website works 24-7, so no matter where you are or what you're doing, people can still find you online. Start building your website today at GoDaddy.

It starts with a.com domain. Enter promo code 199WWC at checkout to get your.com for just $1.99. It used to be $2.99. Now we're down to $1.99. Some limitations apply. See website for details. The code, again, is 199WWC. The 199 stands for $1.99. And the WWC stands for Watch What Crappens Who cares what happens when there's so much that crap is? It actually is a reunion. It's Ronnie Karam and Matt Woodfield. Hi, everyone.

Well, hello. Hi, guys. Welcome back. The trio reunited. Am I, like, on the couch opposite you guys? Because, like, I'm on the outs, clearly. No, are you kidding? No, we've talked to each other so much.

I'll be on your couch. We can gang up on Ben today. Yeah, you guys can do that. You can be, like, Luann. Right, well, I'll be on your couch. We can gang up on Ben today. Yeah, you guys can do that. You can be like Luann. Right, well, I'm always Luann because she is my queen, so I'll be at the end of the good couch. Yeah, exactly. And then you can just say things in the corner like, here we go again. Right, and you

won't have me in the opening credits, but at least I'll have a plastic dishware line. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I'll be like Heather and say a lot of sassy black things and drop the G at the end of my sentences, and Ben can be like Sonya and just name drop people randomly and talk about sex.

But she's a Christian. Well, I'm a Christian and you know, it's just they like hearing my sermons in Saint-Tropez. They're very into that. I get called all the time, Taiwan. They want me in Taiwan to give sermons, my Christian sermons. You know, I get called all the time, Taiwan. They want me in Taiwan to give sermons, my Christian sermons. You know, I'm very popular. It's like

being on your knees longer than any religious person on earth doesn't make you a Christian, bitch. She doesn't need a pew, come on. Pay you. So anyway, why don't you guys tell everyone where we can find you on social media? Matt, why don't you start? I'm going to write it down myself. You can write it everyone where we can find you on social media? Matt, why don't you start?

I'm going to write it down myself. You can write it down. You can find me on Twitter at Life on the M-List, also on Instagram at Life on the M-List. I gave up Vine. Nobody does Vine. Does anybody do Pinterest? Probably not. I'm probably on both of those, but I don't update them.

So just find me back on Twitter at Life on the M-List. People do Vine. 13-year-old boys who like to prank old people. Pretty much. Are they still doing that thing where people walk up to each other on the street and punch each other in the face? Is that like what they do in Vine? If they are, I'd like to see that on the next season of Real Housewives of Anywhere.

I was trying to show my friend Trisha how fun Vine is, and she's like, it's basically teenagers throwing waffles out the car at each other. Like, what the fuck is this like yeah that's pretty much it why would anybody waste a waffle um that's a very good point i'm i may have lost weight but i'm still a fat girl on the inside yeah i would you know what you're actually still a fat girl on your um picture on my texting for some reason well let's let's let's update No, I can't. It does it itself. You can thank Google for its products.

Yeah, well, that's because you have a stupid Android again. Well, it's gigantic, Ben, okay? I need a gigantic phone. Size doesn't matter. It makes me look thinner. You guys can find me, Ronnie Carom, on Twitter, at Ronnie Carom,

or on Vine, at Ronnie Carom, because I'll be throwing waffles at Matt until he's fat again. And just search Ronnie Karam. Google me, betchas. Or you can find me. I hate that. God, I hate Frankie on Big Brother. Are we going there? Are we really going there?

I would love to at the end. Yeah, at the end. Because I know you watch it too. So I'll hurry up. Who cares? Just Google me. Find me. Or come to Trash Talk TV. Really fun recaps. And I'm doing Big Brother in Two Minutes videos every Friday. So I'll hurry up. Who cares? Just Google me, find me. Or come to Trash Talk TV,

really fun recaps. And I'm doing Big Brother in Two Minutes videos every Friday, so find them on YouTube at youtube.com slash trash talk T-E-E-V-E-E. Okay? And I'm at B-Side Blog. That's both my blog,

bsideblog.com. And it's Twitter and Instagram and Vine and Pinterest. I don't know. Really? What are you pinning? Besides hot black dudes. I don't know. Really? What are you pinning? Besides hot black dudes. I don't even do that anymore too much.

I basically just pin, like, if I see a thing that's, like, top five restaurants in, like, Silver Lake or something like that. I don't know. I've been oddly promoting my Pinterest page every week on this podcast, and every time I'm like, I don't even care about Pinterest, but I mention it every week. Yeah, if you want to be on Pinterest, you have to post about your kids

or you have to post Etsy type things like, oh my god, isn't this room gorgeous? Oh wait, I do have a board because I am in the market for a new duvet cover, so I keep on pinning interesting duvets that I see. I go away for a few months and I come back and Ben is now the gayest.

My duvet board is very special. It's called In Search of Duvets, colon, The Ben Mandelker Story. Is Dina Manzo helping you with this duvet board? No, I have taste. Okay. You know that her duvet would have all sorts of crazy, paisley, ornate decorations. Are you kidding? Her favorite thing is a bedazzled high heel.

And images of strange cats. Right. Ronnie, are you back? You sounded a little concerned there for a moment. I think we lost Ronnie. Anyway, Matt, how are you? I'm crazy. The VMAs are this coming Sunday, followed by the Emmys on Monday.

So my life is a pure, utter nightmare mess. But I've decided to take some time out of my busy schedule to hang out with you guys because it's way more fun during the workday. That's so considerate. Now, question, why are the Emmys on a Monday this year? The Emmys are on a Monday because they couldn't secure the Sunday because the VMAs

swooped in and snatched the date first. And yeah, they should be a little concerned because it's on a Monday in the summer. Good luck with that. I know, exactly. And it's airing live in LA, so that means that people have to watch it Monday at 5pm. Yeah, isn't that going to be up against The Real Housewives of New York City as, like, lost footage?

I know. Come on, people. Priorities. I think there's a House Hunters International rerun that it's going to be. Where are they now? Yeah. Yeah. Truly.

And that's crazy that VMA has actually bumped them. But at the same time, it is being opened by Frankie Grande's sister, whatever her name is. Her name is Ariana. Don't let your hatred for Frankie cloud your judgment. Ariana Grande is wonderful. Okay, I know you're getting him at the end. But my favorite was when he was screeching about it in the house and people were like, who's that? Yeah.

She's a huge superstar. I love the Huffington Post. Okay, so let's start with our Bravo. Oh, by the way, everyone, like this podcast's Facebook page, facebook.com forward slash watch what crap happens. Super fun stuff on there. We have links. There's photos. All sorts of stuff that's beyond this podcast.

It really enriches the experience. So really like it because we want to get to 3,000 likes and we're almost there. There's just one more plug and we'll be like Frankie's sock drawer. Let's move on, people. Excuse me, I was just about to transition to the fact that there was so much

Bravo this week. I mean, there is so much Bravo in general. Where does everyone want to start? We have like three housewives. Well, I would like to say so much Bravo in general. Where does everyone want to start? We have, like, three housewives. Well, I would like to say that I have this today. Ooh, ooh, I hear shuffling. I wrote notes, too. I wrote notes on three shows.

Okay, so you guys have notes on shows, but before we jump into that, can you at least tell me what we're not watching? Because I am not on board with the parenting show. No, every time Bravo tries to do a parenting show, it's just, I'm not into it. I'm not into their singles project, although I haven't watched it. I'm not into Jersey Belle, but I also have not watched it. I'm not into it either. But again, like Ben, I've decided that I hate it even without having seen two seconds of it.

I deal enough with parents because I have Facebook and I'm in my 30s. So all of my friends are now parents and I have to listen to that shit all day. I'm not watching it on Bravo. The singles thing, I don't care. I hate – I see them on Tinder and I want no part of it. We're not doing Top Chef duels either, right? Because unless – It's really good.

But what's the point of it though? It's just two people dueling, right? It's really good. You know, we had a shitty attitude about it too, but I watched it out of desperation this week because I like to watch food shows when I binge, and MasterChef is just unbearable. So I watched it. I watched the Marcel episode.

It was really good. Can you tell us what it is? Can you tell us the format? But I just want to say, Marcel is my all-time favorite Top Chef contestant because he's like a cute little gay wolverine, but I felt like they brought him back just so that they could make him lose.

I'm assuming he lost, right? Because they want to vilify him. Yeah, but he wasn't a villain. He's actually matured so much. The villain was Blaze. Blaze was a total prick the whole time to him. And he's so petty, and he shit-talks Marcel the whole time.

He's like, anybody could do that. What a hack. Anybody could do that. Blaze was the all-time worst. He's so disgusting. He is so immature. And Marcel never said one mean thing. He never said one rude thing back.

He was totally positive the whole time. And when he lost, he was like, I always lose and it sucks. But what are you going to do? It's a good show. It's basically just, it's Gail Simmons. You got to love her. I love how Gail Simmons judges shit because she just eats. Yeah.

Yeah, she eats like a normal person. She barely even says anything. She's just like. Well, you know that Padma's always sending her leftovers down to Gail. She has like one or two bites. She's like, please send this down to my good friend Gail Simmons. Right, because Padma just wants to look extra skinny next to fat whale Gail, even though Gail is probably a normal size and or skinny and gorgeous.

She is. Ronnie and I saw her in person when we were extras on Top Chef Just Desserts and she looked totally... Don't even get me started on Top Chef Just Desserts. R.I.P. The best show ever. And why was it great? Because it didn't have Curtis Stone. Stop trying to make him a star, Bravo. Stop trying to make fetch happen.

Seriously, with fucking Curtis Stone. I know. I Seriously. With fucking Curtis Stone. I know. I really can't stand Curtis Stone. It's like, why would you get all these brilliant cooks together and then be like, Oh, here's someone who can't cook and has made it because he's fucking hot. Although, actually, he has a restaurant in Beverly Hills now, and it's gotten excellent reviews, believe it or not. I was shocked.

Yeah, and so did Villa Blanca. And it's a shithole. Villa Blanca's closing. Yeah, as it should. Yeah. Didn't she sell it? Itanca. And it's a shithole. Villa Blanca's closing. Yeah, as it should. Didn't she sell it? It's not like it just closed, you guys. She sold the restaurant. Yeah, she sold it. Adrian Maloof sent in another floral arrangement that was filled with

spores. Like a Hobbit Wonderland. Yeah, Adrian Maloof probably bought it, because remember after she left Housewives, she was threatening to open a restaurant right across the street from Villa Blanca and put it out of business? Adrian Maloof has done it because remember after she left Housewives, she was threatening to open a restaurant right across the street from Philablanca and put it out of business. Well, Adrian Maloof has done a lot of questionable things. Selling like baby formula or whatever you fucking hag. Shut up.

Oh, and she went on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills like one time this season. And she's like, I'm back, everyone. She was? I don't even remember her. Back on the show. Shut up. No, you're not. I don't even remember Adrian on the show this season. No, show. Shut up. No, you're not. I don't even remember Adrian on the show this season.

No, it's this coming up season because I already shoot. Oh, okay. And they're like, actually, she showed up for one day to apologize to Lisa or something. And she's like, it's me. I'm back. I'm a housewife. It's like, no, you're not. Sit down.

Have they already cast somebody to play the Joker on Gotham on Fox the new Batman prequel aren't they like children versions of the superheroes oh that's true isn't it like Muppet Babies yeah it is it's like super origin stories

like their teen origins I'm clutching my Muppet Babies did you just say Muppet babies the Joker will be nanny you'll only see Joker socks okay this is too much so I know that we're going to jump

into all the shows but before we started recording you guys mentioned what we're going to discuss today I'm just very upset with the two of you I know that we're not watching the parenting project we're not watching the singles, Jersey Bell, all this crap if you guys mentioned what we're going to discuss today. I'm just very upset with the two of you. I know that we're not watching The Parenting Project. We're not watching The Singles, Jersey Bell, all this crap. If you guys are not watching, don't be tardy. You're fucking idiots.

Jesus, Matt. Come on now. How could you still be carrying the flag for that show or the torch or whatever? How could you be carrying the wig for that show? T.V. Gold. If I'm going to watch some fat, ignorant horse squirting babies indiscriminately out of her vagina,

I'll just walk to a Walmart. At least I can get a sale there. How is it doing in the ratings? It's dipped a little bit, but she's still pulling in at least a million per episode, and it's hilarious. I don't care what anybody says. All she does is stand around in that kitchen still, shoving waffle fries down her gullet, pointing at

Sweetie with her big French manicured nail and barking like a crazy person. And it's only 22 minutes, so it's perfect. I don't know. That has limited appeal to me. I don't understand the justice in this world. How can that show be doing better than Game of Crowns, which is the funniest show on TV right now? Kim took her

obese nanny, Russian nanny, gave her a hooker makeover, and took her to a chain restaurant in the suburbs of Atlanta and put an earpiece in her to make her hit on ugly dudes at the bar. Half of which were married with wedding rings on.

Listen, here's the thing. It's so above and beyond scripted. It's like, how could this... You can't script that woman. You cannot script her. Okay, I'll watch it. You just you just sold the other I think back my indiscriminate squirting out children out of her vagina at Walmart And I will watch which she does and I don't have a problem She is I do everyone just stop having fun. I you know I have listen I have given rose I have given don't be tardy a try every single season and every single time I want to throw myself off my balcony.

Ideally with a lot of noise to piss off the neighbor downstairs who complains about my footsteps. God, you should. You should just leave the house and leave Don't Be Tardy playing on a loop as loud as possible. Oh, my God. You know they're sending in flooring people because you complain that there's a creaky floorboard. And so they're actually coming in and they're going to like, upend my carpet and all this stuff because she hears a creaky floorboard this is the woman downstairs talk about oh my god why don't they just move her why don't they move her into

another because she's just one of these classically difficult people and i'm sorry i shouldn't even be talking about on the podcast because i mean she's she's the reason why she's relevant to this podcast is because bravo is a show that showcases awful women and she is one of them. She is like a Bravo show without the cameras. I heard you said I wasn't psychic. Alright, let's move on to a show. Let's move on to an actual show. Okay, do you guys want to start with Game of Thrones? Because I don't watch it and I'm never going to be sold on it.

You should be sold on it because it is so hilarious. Aren't they just like old? Are they old ladies? Or are they just looking twice their age because of their makeup? Basically both. I mean, they're middle-aged women from Connecticut and Rhode Island competing in these marginal pageants and assigning a lot of meaning to it that is perhaps like disproportionate to how much meaning it really does have. So when Lizzie gets officially fired from OC, will she then end up on season two of Game of Thrones? Or is she too young now?

She is perhaps too young. She's too classy. She is. It is honestly, it is amazing. Diamante and Susanna, whatever her name is, being crowned with their write-in pageant things for Miss Rhode Island United States and Miss Massachusetts United States. Okay, so they did not win these contests. They wrote in to request that they be named Misses of whatever the state is. And Vanessa is like, no, not Vanessa. What's that stupid woman's name?

Susanna? Yeah, Susanna. She's like, oh, it was hard. There was a questionnaire. I had to fill out the questionnaire. She's like, it's the Princeton of pageantry. It's got like Mrs. America's like old school, but this is more like, you know, Donald Trump.

Cut to them and their big ceremony. They go to basically a glorified Applebee's, except not as nice. Yeah, it's like all wood paneled and shit. Yeah, it's 15 people there, including the town mayor. It is truly a Christopher Guest movie. If you like Waiting for Guffman, if you like Best in Show, that's what this TV show is, except it's real. It is amazing.

I love that the mayor was like, oh, you know, these ladies, they're going to do real good for the town. They're going to do real good. And these 90-year-old women in the audience are just staring around like, is anybody going to clean up the crap I just crapped out all over my chair? I mean, who were those people in the audience? I know. It was so crazy. It's honestly like the craziest show. There were like 25 people in the audience and not even that many.

And it was like this empty restaurant. You know, there was like a salad bar nearby with a bunch of iceberg lettuce in it. And it was just like this dreary. Jell-O mold. Yeah. I mean, it was amazing. And Susanna's standing there in this crazy pink dress that like stolen from her daughter's collection. I mean, the entire scene.

And that's just in the first two minutes of this show. And I'm already like rolling around. And they start feeding each other cake like they just got married. So these two idiots are just standing there like putting cake in each other's mouth going. And then like five minutes. And everybody's just standing there uncomfortable. And seriously, there's 90-year-old women in the audience like, what the fuck? Where are we?

Exactly. So then the show moves on. And then we get to the real meat of the episode, which is that Vanessa invites Shelly and Leha over for some parfait, which also in and of itself is hilarious because the girls come over and Leah starts explaining how she discovered that Lynn had hired a private investigator to trail her and her cop husband, Nick. And while she's explaining this and saying how scared

she is, Vanessa just keeps on going into that parfait. She's like, excuse me, I just need to have more Splenda. Excuse me, I just need the granola. She keeps, Matt, she is spooning Splenda into this thing. Like to have more Splenda. Excuse me, I just need the granola. She keeps, Matt, she is spooning Splenda into this thing. Like, spoon of Splenda. Another spoon of Splenda. And this is the one who's always complaining about how she had cancer.

And I'm just like, you know that Splenda causes cancer, right? Exactly. Like, we just solved the entire mystery of the season right now, bitch. Put down the Splenda, okay? Keep your boo. So somehow between her, like, reaching across the coffee table for every single topping known to man for this parfait, Leah announces that as a retaliation that she has put out a restraining order against Lynn. And, you know, Vanessa's like, oh, my God, this is crazy.

As she, like, suppresses a smile because she hates Lynn. She loves this, you know. Then we cut to Lynn at her house. I mean, the editing on this show is so brilliant. We cut to her. We just see the house, and all we hear is, you know? And you see her, she's crying in the arms of Susanna,

and she's like, like, you know, I'm a lawyer. Like, I have a license with the Supreme Court of Rhode Island, and I went to the court, and everyone was like, what trial are you defending? I'm like, no, I'm a defendant. You know, and it's like these crocodile tears, unlike anything we've seen on Bravo before.

I mean, we've seen crocodile tears on this network. Who would accuse me? Who would say this? Who would do this? I have never held an illegal drug in my life why would I ever drug her why is she telling everybody I'm a drugger so then Susanna she gets up there

she tells us she's like you know what this is this all speaks of Nick and then she goes narcissist idiot that needs to calm down N-I-C-K I'm like lady you not mention a single K word in there, okay? If you were to make an acronym of nurse's idiot that needs to calm down, it would be N-I-T-N-T-C-D, okay?

That's nothing like Nick. That's nothing. There's no Nick in that whatsoever. Nurse's idiot that needs to calm down. Nick. And then, meanwhile, cut back to Lynn going, Honey, help. And her husband starts taking her blood pressure.

Yeah. This is honestly the future of Ashley from Princesses. Help me. Her husband takes her blood pressure, and she's like, Do I even want to know? And he's like, It's high. She's like, Of course it is know he's like it's high he's like of course it is because someone called me a drug dealer who said i raped babies i don't rape babies

what is happening and it wouldn't stop it was like 10 minutes all like later on the episode she's like she's like i think i think i may have to go to the hospital. I just have never felt this way. She's like, take it again, honey. And he's like, you know what? You just need to stop it. He's like, you just need to calm down. You're about to lose it. It is amazing.

And then I have this other note here where Susanna starts yelling that this is not classy. What was she yelling about that about? Why was she getting so upset later on in the episode? Because she said her quote, and I don't even remember the context of this, but it was such a hilarious quote. She goes, this is not classy. The level of class I have been brought down to,

I am Mrs. Rhode Island, United States, okay? It's a very terrible position. My other favorite part was when Vanessa, okay, so Vanessa was going to the doctor... Wait, is her name Vanessa or Vanassa? It's Vanessa. It's V-A-N-A-S-S-A. As in, you can't spell her name without spelling S.

Yeah, Vanessa. So she's going to get her boob checked because all she can talk about is her breast cancer. You know, it's like the favorite Bravo thing. Her platform, by the way, Matt, is that she wants to prove to women that you don't have to be defined by your breast cancer. And every episode is about her breast cancer.

So she's the Aviva of the cast. Yeah, pretty much. Pretty much. But way better than Aviva. But she's on her way and she's with her family in a limo, which I'm so sure. So they're on their way to the doctor in this limo so she can get retested or whatever. So they're on their way to the doctor in the slimo so she can get retested or whatever. And she's like, you know what?

I would just like to thank you guys. You know, if it weren't for you, I wouldn't be where I am today. And, you know, all the struggle that I've gone through in my life and having you. She's giving like she just won a fucking Oscar. It's like, bitch, you're going to get your boobs squished in a machine. Stop acting like you just won something. Jesus. She gave a speech all the way there. She's like,

I'd like to thank my agent. I'd like to thank Cancer for giving me this trip in a limo back to the hospital. It's like, shut up. It is. I mean, honestly, this show is so amazing. And then next week, I'm assuming next week is like the penultimate episode because it's all leading up to, Matt, this pageant called Legends, which has, by the way, not a single legend in it. It's all just people who have been in pageants before. And so pretty much the entire cast is going to be competing against each other in this big pageant.

And even Shelly, who is, she's former. Not for nothing. She's the former Mrs. America in Not for Nothing. She's like, she's, the whole thing this episode also is she was like debating whether or not she wanted to compete in a pageant again. She's like, she's like, I don't know. I don't, I just, I don't like the idea of all eyes being on me. I'm like, come on, Shelly.

You love it. Is this another show, though, that you guys are falling in love with that we used to do in the past? You know, Princesses. This is, honestly, that is no longer, that's a one and done. This is on par with Gallery Girls, if you ask me. Yeah, but no one's watching it except us.

It's gonna die. And even our own listeners, they're like, yeah, we don't get it. I'm like, what? But listen. They're probably all sitting there right now going like, can you get to Big Brother? Thanks. Yeah. It's like we have Matt. We're not even talking to Matt.

But this show is so amazing. And this is one of the most amazing episodes because of that crying scene. I mean. And I will try it. I will try it if you guys try. Have you watched any of the episodes, Matt? Have you watched any? I saw an old lady crying like a few weeks ago.

And I was like, I'm out. I have enough old ladies crying in my life honestly it's so brilliant if you honestly if you look at the backstory the backstory is so catty i mean leading up to this episode the fact that um there was a death threat there was a death threat actually but then lynn lied and said it was to her when it wasn't to her at all and then it became this whole thing and it's just the the amount of like catty intrigue is so above and beyond what we deserve as a human race that that we owe it to this show to watch it yeah it's really bad um i'll try one that's it all right fine um why don't we move on to the real housewives of melbourne how about that? Oh, my God. Are you watching that one, or should we watch something you watch more regularly?

When does it air? Like, I feel like my DVR is recording at, like, 9 a.m. Yeah, that's exactly. That's it. It's on Saturdays. Why is this shit not in prime time? This is, like, the crown jewel. In the now, I just want this and Vancouver.

Honestly, this is the best one, I think. I have to say, I have to be controversial. I actually don't love it. I love listening to them talk, but this episode this week, they did nothing. Okay, so I don't know which one I recently saw. The house was, so they never do anything. No, no, no. They truly did nothing.

I feel like I might have seen the third episode. I don't know if three or four have aired, but I saw a party at the Trashy Ones house. Is that the most recent but I saw a party at the trashy one's house. Is that the most recent one? Yeah, that was the most recent one aired here. No, no, no. The most recent one is the one that happened after that where Janet went on a date

and the other three women went skiing. That's the one that I watched. Oh, okay. Then I suck. I didn't watch that on purpose because I'm trying to watch them with everybody else, damn it. That's the one that aired this week. Well, I don't have Bravo,

so I have them all downloaded. I thought that they were airing them back to... I think the first week they aired one and two back-to-back immediately. Let's just discuss... We can just discuss that on a macro level. Okay, so on a macro level, I will just say... What's the one's name? Cheeky Chucky?

Chica. Or as they say, Chica. Chica. So here they say, Cheeker. Chicker. Cheeker. So here's my thing. After watching like two of the four episodes or whatever, I like team old ladies versus team.

I don't like team young ladies. I like Janet. I'm a big fan of Janet. You have to tell me. You have to tell me. Is she the old blonde lady? I love her. Is she the one that was getting Botox at the beginning?

Probably. She looks like. She's the one that was getting Botox at the beginning? Probably. She looks like Kylie. She's the one who's like, I'm going to die again. She actually looks like Kylie McNogue as a 90-year-old. She looks like a Skeletor meets Kylie Minogue. Kylie Minogue kind of looks like a 90-year-old sometimes. Exactly. That's true. So here's the thing.

On this latest episode, truly nothing happened. Janet went on a date and was like, I'm going on a date with someone who's like 20 years younger. It's a little crazy to go on a date with someone younger, but I'm sort of excited about it. By the way, let's try 30 years younger. He's 35. I mean, how old do you think that woman is?

There's no way she's 55. Sorry. No way. Yeah. I mean, and then what happened was I think Lydia, Lydia, the psychic. You have to refresh me on who is who as we go through these. Lydia is the one with the black hair. Girl, it looks like a stick and a drop.

Lydia's the one with the black hair who's married to the architect. Lydia's the psychic married to the former rock star. No. Lydia is the one... Wait, wait. Lydia is the one who flies in the airplane. Lydia's the one fucking her stepson. Yeah, she's the one who flies around to buy cheese and fucks her stepson. Okay, by the way, that flies around to buy cheese and fucks her stepson. Okay, by the way, my dream is to fly.

Well, I'm terrified of flying, but my dream is to take exotic trips just to buy thousands of dollars of cheese. Yeah, I like that. I'm down with that. So it was Lydia. I won't even walk to the 7-Eleven for M&Ms. I can't imagine going to the airport and getting on a fucking plane to get some cheese. Yeah. I love cheese. Anyway, I hate tea. Yeah. I love cheese.

Anyway, I hate Lydia. Yeah, she's worthless. And then the other two, the psychic was there. And then one whose name I don't know, but she sort of is like the Australian Catherine Keener. You know, she's the one who has all the. Don't do that to Catherine Keener. I love Catherine Keener.

I think she looks like Geena Davis. No. Oh, no. Lydia does. Geena Gina Davis. No. Lydia does. Gina Davis now. Yes, the one married to the plastic surgeon. You think she looks like Gina Davis? Gina Davis got puffy after she became an archery student.

I know. Listen, I've even seen puffy Gina Davis. Listen, I know Gina Davis. I've watched Gina Davis' movie, and that, sir, is no Gina Davis. She looks like she gave Gina gina davis pictures to her plastic surgeon was like do that to me and he just can't quite do it she kind of reminds me of someone on death becomes her that movie yeah um she looks like she's falling apart she's her body doesn't even look real because she's so spanked up and she's gotten shit sucked out of the wrong

places i mean the woman's a mess when they showed her at that party dancing, I was like, oh no. The surgery didn't set right. It's falling in all the wrong places. I'm standing behind Australian Catherine Keener. I'm really standing behind that. I feel very confident in that assessment. Wait, so who's the one that looks like a

complete man and is always bedecked in jewels? That's Gina. I actually kind of like her. She's my favorite. I like her a lot. I like her and Janet the most. Chica's like a nothing. I think that she looks like Stalker Channing in Grease. She does kind of, actually.

Like, there are worse things I could do. You know that she kind of probably smells like onions and garlic all the time, probably, right? No, don't say that. Don't you feel like five minutes before you see her, she just ate, like, dipped some bread into some olive oil? I feel like she smells

like a woman's dressing room and coffee and lipstick. I mean, I love her. And maybe, like, some peppermint. She's a ballista. Okay, so she puts that big white wig on top of her big brown wig.'s like wig on wig like this is a wig on wig crime it is exactly it's she is truly giving kim zolciak a run for her money or money

that she doesn't have when they revealed that she was a lawyer i fucking almost fell off the couch she is hilarious and i love that she just talks like that she talks like this she has she has a partner she has a partner in America. Didn't they break up? Yeah, they broke up because you know what? She deserves to be with somebody who can spend time with her just like me. Did you break up with your boyfriend? Which one?

I only see you on Instagram. You're always with some cute guy. I assume that was your boyfriend. That's my bowling league. I don't date him. Well, Well never mind we won't get into that We have to get a full update on that situation Yeah that'll be for Watch What Crappens After Dark

Yeah that's the exclusive content On TBGN Wait this week on So this week on Melbourne Gina She was funny she was talking about how she had cancer. She's like, when my doctor told me I had cancer, I told her

no, I don't. I do not have cancer and get it out of my body right now. I mean, I kind of love that attitude. Yeah. It's the best housewives attitude about cancer I've ever seen. I don't know. It was the best. She was like, I don't have it. I don't have it. Get it out of my body ever seen. I don't know. It was the best. She was like, I don't have it. I don't have it.

Get it out of my body right now. I don't. She doesn't try to use it. And then she goes, Oh, boo-hoo me having cancer. Sorry to put that on you anyway. And moves on. She's so the best. And she and Lisa Vanderpump would be BFF. She is great.

Meanwhile, what you guys also missed is apparently, when people talk about missed is, apparently, you know, when people talk about playing telephone, apparently, outside of the United States, it has a much more racist name. It's called Chinese Whispers. Don't get me started on Chinese Whispers. Because Lydia, Lydia's like, oh, this is all Chinese Whispers.

It's Chinese Whispering. And then, at one point, someone talks, she's like, stop that. Stop with the Chinese Whispering. So, I actually watched the show. And they even had it as a hashtag on the show chinese whispering i was um so i actually watched the show with my very very dear friend michael who's from canberra which is um like an hour outside of sydney because i was like i need somebody to watch this with me because it's probably it's probably not gonna have subtitles i need somebody to explain all of the terms.

And he just was telling me, like, people actually say Chinese whispers and it is fucked up. Well, I mean, Australia is like kind of like a super racist place. Well, no, he admitted that. He openly admitted that to me, too. And he's like, oh, we have to watch this entire series and I'll tell you all the real horrible things. Yeah. It's like, you know, I don't think that psychic is real. Oh, you know what she said about you? Dong-a- dong dong dong dong oh my god i'm gonna kill her you know the

thing is with this show i've noticed is that um you know stylistically it's a little bit more narrated than our other shows and it's kind of funny because all the women say these things is that they're making a like a cheeky joke and they're saying very simple things. They're like, so then I went to the cheese shop because I love cheese. And you're like, okay. It's like, one thing I love to do is I love to go skiing. That's it. That's all that they say.

They're like, right, but I'm fine with that because it's lunchtime. But it's actually more realistic. And by the way, I want to go eat at Cheeky Choco's Market Pantry Kitchen. Whatever. It's delicious. We worked real hard on the font.

My gay husband and I have been working together. She's obsessed with the color yellow and the font. Meanwhile, she's like, it's on everything. You've got to stay consistent with your font. By the way, the other thing you guys missed in this episode was that when the three girls went up to go skiing and everything, they kind of had like a pile-on session where they were making fun of Gina. And the Catherine Keener one, once she started realizing they were making fun of Gina, she went crazy. She started really piling on. But in the worst joke, she's like, you know what she looks like?

She looks like a man, right? She's like, you know what her favorite film is priscilla queen of the desert get it because she's she's a drag queen you know what she probably likes a lot of makeup and like all her jokes were like that she's like you know when you see it go skiing you probably see all the makeup behind her on the ski slope. Right? And she's like, they're like cracking up. Just like me right now. She's like, she can't go on an airplane because she's got too much hair. Her hair's so big, it could be an airplane in and of itself. See, that's actually too funny for her.

She's like, she doesn't wear the pants. She wears the pants and the shirt. She's not just a barrister. She's an wear the pants. She wears the pants and the shirt. She's not just a barrister. She's an embarrassing-ister. And she was like doing that for like 10 minutes. And they were like cracking up. She literally made the joke about Priscilla Queen of the Desert. And she said it like this.

You know what her favorite film is? It's Priscilla Queen of the Desert. I'm going to go to the bathroom now. And guess what? Gina goes to the bathroom now. And guess what? Gina goes to the bathroom too. All I know is that when I heard their pretty, pretty voices, I immediately was like, oh, dust off my Kath and Kim

DVDs. We have to go there. I need to go there. Oh my god, that show was so good. The Australian one was so good. You're not referring to the Selma Blair knockoff? Oh my god, no, I just could not stop feeling terrible for Molly What's Her But? Molly Shannon's so funny,

I was like, why did they give her such a bad show? Oh, that's just awful. Wait, wait, so wait, you guys hate the psychic, right? The psychic with the troll husband? Because here's my thing, Lydia and the psychic, I think that Lydia stirred the pot, and she got in the psychic's head and made the man, who's the man, and made Gina look bad.

But it's all Lydia's fault. And the psychic was just awful. And then Lydia's like, how did I get in the middle of this? Because you started it, bitch. Yeah, she's like, I don't want to get in the middle. And then you continued it. You showed up at the party and you're like, did you guys hear what Junior said? Like, yes, they heard what Junior said, all right.

You got it wrong. But the psychic is hilarious. She's like, oh, you know, angels are telling me my business plan. So the angels told me to have different flavored cocktails. And my husband looks like Johnny Depp. I'm like, Johnny Depp playing Marlon Brando, bitch. What if she says the word rock star he's a rock star he's a rock star he's in silver chair and they wanted to meet him cuz he's so famous well they were she was like all the celebrities they gonna be at our party I

was scouring like hitting the pause button mom no celebrities. Not even, like, anybody from, like, Neighbors, the Australian, like, nobody. I want her to go on next season of Big Brother, and that way, halfway through the season, she'll be like, everyone, I've been playing this game of the lie. I've been lying since I walked in the door. I'm married to the biggest rock star

on the planet. His name, I don't even know his name, but he was in Silver Chair, and that's my husband. So think about that. Oh, God. Like, doesn't that money run out at some point? Like, they were, like, the Hanson of Australia, but not as popular for, like,

maybe they had a record and a half. They had one song in America, let's be honest. But I think they actually did well in Australia. Who's this? Silverchair. Australia has, like, 60,000 people. If everybody in Australia bought the record, they still wouldn't be rich.

You're sounding like a real angry Sheila right now. A dingo ate my royalties. Oh my god. So, okay. It's funny talking about Lydia being in the middle and being like, I don't want to be in the middle. Because you know who else does that?

I smell a segue. Melissa Gorga. Melissa Gorga. She's the queen of that. Oh, my God. Okay. So, you know how all of this, the past couple years with Melissa, Teresa, we've all been saying Teresa's crazy when she says, this girl, all she wants to do is copy me.

Everything I do, she does. It makes me fucking crazy. If I have the same dress, she buys it. If I do this, she does it. She wants to be on my show. And we're all like, Teresa, who would want to be like you? You look like you're in Planet of the Apes. She does want to be like her.

And she does copy her. And it's so clear now that she's not fighting all the time. And she's actually trying to show her real personality. This week she even started doing this. She started doing that Teresa squeal thing and I was like, wow, you're really sad. You're a sad, bad impersonation. Someone needs to sit her down and go,

Melissa! Melissa! Melissa! That's my Amber impersonation. Melissa! I'm sorry. I haven't been here in a few weeks or a few months. I hate the entire new batch of ladies. They're awful, aren't they? They really are.

And I even hate the return of Dina. I just think the entire thing is crap. I think it's over. I think Jersey is done. Yeah, Jersey needs to be done. It's time for that show to decide. Did you hear, though, that there's a thing out on Radar Online, which is the most credible source out there,

and they said that Jacqueline was guesting on Caroline's spinoff and that Bravo, I think, was starting to notice that Jersey's numbers were dropping because it used to be number two right up there behind Atlanta, massive numbers, blah, blah, blah. And they were saying that they want to bring back Jacqueline for a hefty pay raise of $800,000 a season. She's not worth it, but I'm also like, but yes, I miss her having that whole situation with Teresa where she's like, I love her. I hate her. I'm crying.

I'm fat. I'm eating a pastrami sandwich. I'm sad. Excuse me. If they're going to bring back a face from the past or, you know, to resurrect New Jersey, don't put it on Jacqueline Laredo, the most boring of them all. Bring back Danielle Staub for crying out loud. It's so obvious. I think, yeah, I mean, these producers, if that's true, these producers are morons because

Jackie's part of the reason that this show is so unpopular now. Who the fuck wants to watch it anymore? because Jackie's part of the reason that this show is so unpopular now. Who the fuck wants to watch it anymore? Last year was all about her crying about her son and coming up with water and trying to use her son's illness to sell her fucking water, which is really gross. Right.

The issue with this show is not that everyone's pining for the Manzos. The issue is that the women that they brought on are just like, they're stupid, they're not enjoyable, and they're too quick to get into conflict. There's nothing like real... They're too thirsty. They're trying too hard. So thirsty. Like, you don't pull hair at the beginning of the season, bitch. For no reason.

I mean, those twins were so excited when they finally had a reason to fight with Amber. They're like, we're leaving the store! We're leaving! Keep our stuff! Send it over! We gotta go! Let's get gas. Hurry. Put the gas in. Hurry.

We got to go. They're running out of coladas at Dunkin' Donuts. Come on. They were just so excited to go yell at somebody, you know? Yeah. Shut up. And then, of course, this week, it's like, oh, I forgave her. I forgave.

You know, I mean, I forgive easily, you know? That's just how I am. That's why I'm Nicole Napolitano. Oh, she's awful. And then when they showed her at the office, and first of all... Oh, at the office. That office was like the opening scenes of Wolf of Wall Street. That was that office.

Totally. Where were they? In Staten Island or some shit? I don't know. It was clearly like, they were not booking private jets. They were scamming people. No, and her louis vuitton purse was worth more than all of the office furniture yeah and i mean i practically

i expected alec baldwin to come in and be like always be selling always be selling and yes i realize i'm mixing my movie metaphors but i'm okay with it yeah and you got it wrong it's always be closing closing sorry oh yeah that's right i'm like why does that sound wrong that's right we made a david mammet reference here on Watch What Crappens. That's right, guys. Coffee's for closers. All right. There we go.

But yeah, could you, we've all worked with that girl. You know, the girl who's like, oh, I got a call. Let me take you on speakerphone. Yeah, I was about to say, who takes a personal call in a shared office on speaker? I'm going to be near you. I would love to go to lunch and discuss our issues. Oh, well, really? I don't know what I would even say to you. I don't even know if I could talk

to you at lunch. Okay, goodbye! Oh, these women are awful. Make it stop. I love that when they get into a fight like that, they both just end up talking over each other for the last five minutes of the call until they both hit the off button at the same time. And no, but nothing's been resolved. A reservation has not

been made. Yeah, exactly. You don't need a reservation at Applebee's. Yeah, exactly. I love how Amber's like, I don't want to be at a fancy restaurant and have someone yelling at me. Cut to them being at a pastry shop. That's probably attached to a mobile station.

I'll yell at you at the new taco company, the new Taco Bell upscale restaurant thing. It's a Taco Bell, Baskin Robbins combo. It's very classy. They should have gone to Serendipity 3 where Dina went on her horrible date and

ate a bucket of french fries. I know, or they should have gone to one of Vito's restaurants. Now, Vito, I like Vito. I feel like Vito is... Why? I hate him. Oh, I enjoy him. Who comes to Vito? The restaurateur guy? Oh,ito's restaurants. Now, Vito, I like Vito. I feel like Vito is... Why? I hate him. Oh, I enjoy him. Who comes Vito? He's the restaurateur guy? Oh, he's awful. He's, like, encouraging his son to drop out of high school. Well, yeah, that's bad. That's awful. He's like, yeah, you're gonna be like me,

kid. I didn't even go to school. Now look at me. I'm like, yeah, look at you walking around your own restaurant asking your customers to buy you a fucking drink, you fucking loser. I still like him. I still like him. But, you know, by the way, that son, I was like, wait a second. Tag and release. He's kind of hot. He has big arms. Did you see that? He has big arms.

Yeah, tag and release. Five years from now, boom. He still has to go through some final stages of puberty with the acne and stuff like that. Yeah, once he gets a little proactive, he'll grow into the nose, he'll get the better haircut, and the acne will be gone, and it's on.

And he'll own a 3,000 square foot restaurant in Brooklyn. So there you go. No, in New Jersey. In New Jersey, it's going to be in that rickety, I don't know, structure. Speaking of the restaurants, we did have a whole long scene where most of the cast got together, and we saw Rosie's girlfriend. Yeah, that was super cute. It was cute. I don't have much to say about that.

I mean, that was cute. Basically, I was just like, you know what? Everybody can do something for everybody. I need to get back out there. It only made me feel bad about myself. Rosie's like, yo, I snared her just like a sniper

would, you know? I went up to her with a net and put it around her, just like a sniper. Just like a sniper. She's like, I'd like to give a toast to my lovely lady. Oh no. I like when they were like, okay, Rosie, that's enough of your story. Now you tell your side.

And she's like, well, I was at this bar, and I saw Rosie. She was so innocent. I was like, ooh, child molester. Creepy! That lady gives me the creeps. Doesn't she look like Jon Hamm's lady partner? What's her name again? Jessica, Jennifer, whatever.

Oh no, kissing Jessica Stein. Yes, Jennifer Westphal. She does look a lot like her. Maybe it's her. Yeah. Maybe that's her. Which is actually Jon Hammond drag is Jennifer Westfield. Oh shit. Just saying.

Oh shit. Maybe that's why he shoves a banana down his pants. No one will question it. Yeah, that's true too. Everyone's like, he can't be her. He's got a giant wiener. Meanwhile, it's just like a big old ham hock. Meanwhile, in Teresa Land, it was like

the continuing story of Joe Giudice, Father of the Year, aka Felon. I'm so sick of this good edit that they're getting. It really makes me sick. Well, you know what? One wonderful thing happened this week was when Dina made Teresa make a vision board.

Oh, yeah. And she's like, here's what you do for a vision board. You just put the things you want. Teresa's like, I don't want nothing. I just want health. And she's like, then put health on there. How funny was it that she cut out the word freedom because she knows they're criminals? Yeah.

Like, I just saw that in big ass on the board I was like it could have been a reference to Melania like please free us of this devil child I'm surprised that Melania doesn't live in the cages out back with the German shepherds with Simba and the chickens you know that she would rule that roost

Simba would be in the corner crying the chickens would be like dead again because they keep on dying Gia would go out there and be like mom the chickens are dead what do i do melania just ate a chicken's neck oh my kiss the boy then i saw a chicken get killed by melania wait so ben are you not feeling that you know when joe sits down with uh gia for her birthday and talks about you know boys and stuff like that. You think that that's just them trying to make him look like a good guy on screen?

No, no, I thought that was a sincere moment. I thought that was actually very touching. But what I don't like, though, is this whole thing of, like, Joe's a good dad. You know, he provides for his family. And, you know, we need to rally around him during these hard times. It's like, okay, he may be good to his daughters, which I'm not always totally 100%. I don't know if I totally believe that. But like rally around him again as if like things have happened to him.

No, he brought it on himself. He is a crook. Academy is a new scripted podcast that follows Ava Richards, played by HBO's Industries, Myhala Herald, a brilliant scholarship student who has to quickly adapt to her newfound eat-or-be-eaten world. Ava's ambitions take hold and her small-town values break in hopes of

becoming the first scholarship student to make The List, Bishop Gray's all-coveted academic top 10, curated by the headmaster himself. But after realizing she has no chance at The List on her own, she reluctantly accepts an invitation to a secret underground society that pulls the strings on campus life and academic success. If she bends to their will, she'll have everything she's ever dreamed of. But at what cost?

Academy takes you into the world of a cutthroat private school where power, money, and sex collide in a game of life and death. Follow Academy on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Academy early and ad-free right now

by joining Wondery Plus. From Wondery, this is Black History For Real. I'm Francesca Ramsey. And I'm Conscious Lee. What do most people think about when they hear the words Black History? Rosa Parks, Reconstruction, MLK, February,

Black History Month. Exactly, exactly. There are so many stories of Black History that we just are not really talking about or thinking about, especially outside of February. And we are about to flip the script on all of that. Because on this show, you're going to hear a little less

In August 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue. And a little bit more. She is a heroine to some. As a fighter for black rights, she is a villain to others. Follow Black History for Real on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. Listen everywhere

on February 5th, or you can listen early and ad-free on Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. Listen everywhere on February 5th, or you can listen early and ad-free on Wondery Plus starting January 29th. Join Wondery Plus on the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Black is beautiful. A mook. A crook and a mook. I don't know what's wrong with me, but in a weird way, I'm like rooting for Teresa. But I think it's only because I hate all of the new cast members and I want to stick it

I want to stick with my old school ladies I do like Amber's kids actually despite how awful Amber and Jim are they're awful, the children are awful the commercial was awful that whole family just needs to be moved that kid doing the British accent and serving milkshakes

I liked it. I liked it. That was the worst. Oh, please. His British accents sounded way nicer than any other accent we heard on the show. Ugh, those children are terrible. Those parents are terrible. They need to just be moved into a different place away from me.

The show definitely needs to be rejiggered. My favorite quote of the show was Teresa saying, I don't need to do a visioned. My favorite quote of the show was Teresa saying, I don't need to do a vision board. My head is a vision board. Oh, my God. Very small. I wrote that really big.

Not a lot of space for clip ads. And I love that Melissa and her stupid husband, who are kind of obviously on something, right? Is it just me who's getting that vibe? No, 100%. They're twitching like meth heads. Like, there's something going on there. I'm guessing Crystal.

That's my guess. Crystal Waters, 100% pure love. Yeah, there's something fucked up there. Their faces are looking fucked up. Their skin's not right. Joe especially is fucked up. But anyway, allegedly, as Kathy Griffin would say. But I love that the show opened with them at the garbage truck, talking about

their stupid garbage truck, and they were at the Bentley place. Excuse me, let's get real for a second. That was not a Bentley dealership. This is where people that have, yes, lots of money, but not that much money go to buy their

expensive cars that are clearly three years old. I'm sorry, look, I am poor in the grand scheme of things compared to these people, but those are clearly the Bentleys that Jay-Z drove three years ago or that somebody drove and got shot in or it got repossessed

and now the Gorgas can maybe rent it. Yeah, like Beyonce's sister already peed in the passenger seat of this car. Exactly. That's Solange's leftovers. I was about to say, and don't refer to her as Beyonce's sister. Her name is Solange. She's Beyonce's

sister. Okay, any record sale she has is pretty much because she's Beyonce's sister. Let's not front. Just like Kelly Rowland and Michelle Williams are Beyonce's former bandmates. I like Solange for Solange. But you know what I thought was funny was when they were hemming and hawing on the design of their truck. And Melissa's like, why don't you put on wings or whatever?

They were acting as if it was an ice cream truck. As if people saw this truck going down the street, they're going to come out with all their papers that need to be shred. Wait a second. It's like, no, it doesn't work that way. They're going to make an appointment for you. I've got some junk mail for you to burn. Like what kind of business is that? I love that Melissa's story.

Melissa's such a fucking liar, by the way. Every time she opens her mouth, it's another lie. And I love that this week it was, oh, yeah, you know, I'm real good with business. When I first met Joe, I was in his father's garage doing paperwork. Right. What? Just because you know how to sit at a desk doesn't mean you know how to do a job. Yeah.

And also, we know that Joe met you when you were working in some strip club. Like, everybody fucking knows that already. Yeah, that's what she means by paperwork. Doing paperwork in a garage. That was a straight-up lie. It was just like she was swinging upside down. Well, that's what she means by paperwork. She's getting paper thrown at her. Making it

right with the paper. Yeah, dollar bills, y'all. Making paper, yo. And I always, you know, this is the other thing about her. She's such a hypocrite too. She always wears, and I don't know why, like I pick up on these tiny little details. She always wears that like gold cross necklace that the cross goes sideways.

And I just know that half of these women, especially people like her, they wear those necklaces that are like they don't dangle too far down. She wants to show prominently that she's wearing a cross so that people can think she's a good Christian, even though, you know, she's the fucking devil. Yeah. Yeah. The biggest crosses are the biggest assholes always. Yeah. Oh, of course. And, you know, the other thing.

Look at Big Brother. Look at Devin. crosses are the biggest assholes always yeah oh of course and you know the other thing brother look at devin the very first shot they showed of that guy devin was him talking to his daughter acting like a good father like you're talking to your daughter on skype first of all yeah and then second of all behind you is a wall of like 50 crucifixes like you you're automatically already an asshole like you can call it and of course he was the biggest asshole on the show exactly it's sort of surprising that jacosta didn't turn out to be a huge asshole because she talked about jesus so much but then as a result she turned out to be like the worst player ever because all she did was talk about jesus yeah or just say things like i just give i give and i give and now someone's giving to me.

I'm the one who gives. Oh, thank you, Jesus. I hear the block calling. Whatever. As we're discussing Jersey. Block, it's me, Jocasta. Oh, my God. Don't get me started on Jocasta and the bow tie. Okay, anyway, as we're discussing Jersey right now,

I just got the new batch of links that just came in from Radar Online. I'll just read you the Jersey-related headlines. Bravo ignores Teresa Giudice's plea not to send cameras to the sentencing hearing. So clearly Bravo is going to milk this for all it's worth, especially if the show is going down in flames. They're going to get every last crying possible minute out of Teresa. Yeah, of course. And it also says on here, Teresa Giudice gave her daughter a fake, in all capital letters, family

heirloom. So who knows where that ring came from? Claire's. Claire's. She's like, this is from your Auntie Claire. It probably was like a ring that was attached to a wine glass at TJ Maxx and she pried it off. You know? You know they have it on the base of the stems? Totally. Write your name on

this so you never lose your Dr. Pepper. God, I hate those wine tags. I hate that shit. I do too. God, there's nothing I hate more than a holiday wine tag. Ben, you're the snowman. Ronnie, you're the Christmas tree. And I'll be the little angel.

Or the little drummer boy. I'm so glad I haven't encountered that yet. I hate that shit. If I ever had holiday drink tags, I would make Matt's socks that were rolled up into each other. Oh, yes. Perfect. That's too close to home.

Not a strand of pearls. A balled up sock on a strand of pearls. Ronnie's would be some Persian flatbread. Fucking Persians. I was at the Grove last night. I thought that they all stayed at the Americana, but they are coming over down into LA. Actually, this is very interesting.

I was at the Grove last week also. Lately, if you go to the Grove, it's hugely Muslim. I was there last night and I was shocked at how many Muslims were there. I ate at the Greek restaurant and I was like, what is happening? How can you tell? Because the women are dressed in burqas.

No way. It's like full on burqa palooza at the Grove. No way. Are you kidding? I'm not joking. The train was filled with burqas. It's a Berka-palooza at the Grove these days. So interesting. No way. Are you kidding? I'm not. No joke. The train was filled with Berkas. No, I'm telling you. It's a little trolley.

I'm not even kidding. I'm telling you. It's crazy. And I'm, you know, I'm like, this is like, I've had this conversation with many people. And so someone actually went and did some research. And this may sound weird, but apparently. Well, is it going to sound like a Chinese whisper? This is some Chinese whispering that I'm going to divulge.

But my friend found out from, I guess, someone who works at The Grove, that apparently in the summer it's just extremely hot in the Middle East. And what happens is that people from the Middle East actually come to L.A. where it's milder. You know what? That's true. My friend, I won't say her name right now, but she took a three-week vacation to L.A. because she lives in Dubai. She just left, like, last week. Yeah, and it's, like,

so people are coming to LA, and apparently, also these people are, like, stupidly wealthy, and just, like, buy stuff without even trying it on. It's, like, it's the best time ever for the Grove. But yeah, if you go there, it's supes muzzy right now. Wow, I love that they come

here to cool down and wear burkas. Hashtag Supes Muzzy next to hashtag Chinese Whispers. I'd like to be covered from head to toe in somewhere a little bit cooler. Yeah. I know. All right. All right, guys. So why don't we move on to Orange County?

Is that the only other thing that we have left to discuss Where's New York at New York is done It's over dude Okay New York is over We didn't talk to you about it Well I just want to know where you guys stand On who should be back next season

Like just everyone I think everybody I don't really love Kristen. I don't love Kristen. I liked Kristen in the beginning. Yeah, I mean, you could probably swap. The thing is, what I like about Heather is that she does get feisty every now and then, you know? She does, but I'm really, I know this is going to sound totally crazy,

and I bet you guys are going to disagree with me and probably a lot of our listeners. I'm kind of tired of the Heather and what's the Crypt Keeper? Carol. Carol and Heather, like that twosome, I'm kind of tired. Yeah, but Carol's funny, though. Okay, so if you can get rid of anyone, get rid of Heather and Kristen.

Yeah, I like Carol, okay. You know what needs to happen? I'm just going to say this. It needs to be Luanne, Ramona, Sonia, Jill Zarin, Kelly Ben-Simon, Alex McCord, and Bethany Frankel. No! Bring them all back. I agree. That's what needs to happen.

Don't bring back Cindy Barshop. You know what? Well, first of all, it's rumored that Bethany's going to come back. You guys have heard that, right? Well, her talk show is done, and she's been in talks with NBCUniversal, so she'll probably guest star for Andy when he goes on his gay vacations, but I think that part of that contract should demand that she comes back part-time

to Housewives. I want to see her there again, dating. She's now dating this dude that she may end up marrying again. I want to see that all again, because she truly is a Bravo star. Like, I'm sorry, but you know, at the end of the day, Aviva is not a Bravo star. I need more star power.

I need Jill Zarin. You know, Bethany, I wouldn't mind. I didn't hate Bethany. I liked her when she was on the show. My hate for her grew after the show. Yeah, same. But I liked her when she was on the show. But, you know, when Alex and Jill, when all that, and Kelly, they were awful people.

And when that show was on, when they were on it do you remember I could not stand that show I could not fucking watch that show neurotic women just being naggy and neurotic with each other I can't with that let's move on because we still have two more shows to cover what are the other shows Below Deck and OC

let's just go for OC because Below Deck still isn't even online I'm sorry Matt you haven't watched Below Deck yet Ronnie still isn't even online. I'm sorry, Matt. You haven't watched Below Deck yet, Ronnie. It hasn't come online yet, and I stopped paying for cable. Okay, let's just do Below Deck in two seconds, Ben. It's the dumbest show ever. Nothing happens.

It's really me watching people clean windows for an hour, and I love it. It's on a fucking boat, right? I enjoy it. I enjoy it now. They're like, clean the deck, kid. And he's like, I don't want to. And he's like, you're going to get fired. I'm like, who cares?

Like, do you not have any fucking busboys to follow around? Why am I watching this? Listen, Ronnie, what you missed was a very tense moment when someone fell off a swing. And that's the cliffhanger. It was the military guy. And what I actually think is funny is that this guy does like a tour of duty with the military. He goes to Iraq or wherever he is. But at the end of the day, it's going to be a swing in the Bahamas that does him in. He can drive a tank and shoot a rocket launcher, but he can't swing.

Yeah. But you know what, though? I like him now because when he was crying with his sister, it was so sweet. I was like, oh. I don't know why. I mean, I sit there and I watch it and it's like oh and I'm looking at my watch and I'm like this is my life this is what I'm choosing to do with my life we need to say I can't not turn it off well we need to see more of them getting drunk because that's what's fun

that's when cat goes crazy um I like the Cate Blanchett woman uh who's like the first steward oh Shelly Long I like her she's cute yeah and I loved like the whole like napkin scene for some reason I was like very involved in the napkin scene that happened but the reality is like every single episode is going to be exactly the same somebody's not going to clean the deck properly somebody is going to get drunk and fall and then they're going to be some fat new money rich white trash people who are like i want cheese sticks yeah that's going to be every episode and I'm committing to it. I'm actually okay with it. I'm on board.

No pun intended. You know what? If I want to watch a bunch of maids bitch at each other, I'll go down to the street to the bus stop in front of the Whole Foods and watch that shit without commercials. Okay, can we get to the point? Let's get to the point. Let's get to OC. OC!

This is the best of all of them. Okay, can we get to the point? Let's get to the point. Let's get to O.C. O.C. O.C. I'm sorry. This is the best of all of them. O.C., this season has been on point. Excellent. And a lot of talk on our Facebook page and people not liking the ending to it. And I have to say, loved the ending to it. I thought it was so good.

I love that Shannon shot all of the drama down in one sentence, and then the show was forced to focus on real things. They ended it in a positive way, which never happens. I didn't care one way or another about how it ended. I thought it was a little weird how it didn't end at the party, but I didn't care.

Here's the thing. This show has had nine seasons, and yes, Vicky, I've loved her. I've hated her. I've felt nothing for her at certain times. I actually liked that they gave her the final ten minutes because I actually – this is going to make me sound like a complete idiot. I actually think that she really is suffering with Brianna leaving with Ryan and these babies. And the ugly baby.

And the ugly baby who looks like that baby. It looks like the baby that is in like the like the devil baby they put in a cage that they try to sell at halloween every year at those halloween stores it's that little baby that they had popping out at people on those viral videos and that satan movie came out yes you remember those but anyway so i like that they gave vicky the final 10 minutes of the show like that it was fine because you, like you said, Shannon shut the shit down at the dinner party. Yeah. But that being said, that dinner party was quite fun to watch.

Yeah, let's go there and then we'll go to the end. Yeah. So let's see. Where do we begin? I mean, you know, the party started. Okay, Tamara started off the episode by trying to pull a Lisa Vanderpump. Yeah. Tamara started off the episode by trying to pull a Lisa Vanderpump. Yep. Where she was like, I left the trip because everybody was so mean to me, and they were so horrible, and I know they were just talking behind my back.

I was being attacked. Honey, you are no Lisa Vanderpump. Yeah. I'm sorry. She is a mean attacker. Yeah, Lisa Vanderpump was actual, like, we were actually rooting for her. The whole world is rooting for your ass to go down she probably had to race back

because she was probably needing to be in court because she's a horrible mother and Simon was taken to court for being a neglectful mother well I wish they could have talked about that stuff I understand they couldn't for legal reasons but at the end when she's trying to use it to get sympathy all I could think

of is why is your head so big, but then your cheeks are so small? What happened to you? Are you getting your fucking skull shaved? Is that a thing? What's happening? It looks like you've been sanded down. So, well, I think the dinner party

started off more or less fine, and then it started to go downhill when... Wait, wait, wait. What did you think about Tamra's fake little chit-chat with Brooks before the whole party ended up? Oh, that was so stupid. Well, I mean, like, how many times does she have to have that conversation with everyone in this cast, you know? But you know that everything that comes out of her mouth is a lie. Like, they were not really buddies by the end of that two-minute chat.

He's like, well, we all make mistakes. We all make mistakes, and I accept your apology apology and I hope we can go to a better place and let's go back to talking bone Vicky. Why is he Forrest Gump? Because he is. He is. Except not as smart. He's like, I bought a card for you Tamara. And it says we've both been in court.

We've both come up short. Let's just hug and have a good snort. You got any coke honey? Life is like a box of chocolates. If you sit on it, it melts. Is that how it goes? Is that the saying? Hey, look, there's a feather.

Let's go play some ping pong. I'm going gonna shoot the ball I'm gonna shoot the ball into Vicky's vagina it's not too much that's my favorite body part you would never know I quit smoking two fucking years ago

okay um I want to talk about Tamara's makeup in that scene she looks like there are these beavers that live under the street where i live and when i walk my dog late at night they poke their head out of the gutter and they hiss you live in west hollywood there are not beavers there's like these animals that live under there and they look like they're gonna come out and kill it no no they're rabbits yeah let's say beavers there's no beavers on Fairfax.

At least not the animal kind. I'm like, you guys, I walk through my closet and it opens to another world where this lady's trying to feed me chocolate all the time and take me on her sleigh. They look like raccoons. Yes, okay. Raccoon.

Yeah, they're raccoons. That's what she looked like. I was like, oh my god, Bueller, don't try and eat that. It will poison you. Did I lose you? I don't know. I think we're just... I'm still just thinking about the idea of little beavers in the gutter. Like the clown from It.

Yes, exactly. It's waiting to pull you in. Except it's Tamra. Although Tamra and the clown from It. Yes, exactly. Waiting to pull you in. Except it's Tamra. Although Tamra and the clown from It are pretty close. I've never even seen It, but I know there's a scene where the clown... Yeah, Pennywise. Yeah, Pennywise. Isn't there a scene where the clown comes out of the drain of a shower?

I imagine Tamra doing that to people every single night. Well, she don't have a penny and she's not wise, so I don't think that applies here. In the locker room at Cut Fitness. Yeah. so I don't think that applies here. In the locker room at Cut Fitness. Yeah. Where they don't put towels and goods on the shelves because it makes it look cluttered.

Ryan is leaving for that old ass woman and now she's pregnant. What is up with that? You know, listen, we need more white trash in the world. So hey, all the power to them. I wonder if they're going to name the baby Nugget. Remember that? Remember Nugget?

Isn't that tattooed in his lip? Yeah, it's in his inner lip. And remember, that's when she started sobbing. I think she was in Lake Havasu with Vicky. That might have been the episode where Vicky got hit in the head. Yes, it was. It was right after that. There were a lot of tears. That was a classic episode. Season 3 classic. That was a great season. I think that was the Gretchen

season, or was that the season before it? It was either season three or season four. That was a great stretch. Yes, cowboy hats. Holla. Yeah. There have been some great seasons of OC. There really have been, and we have not had a great one in a while.

This is the best one since Lynn Curtin was evicted. Okay, so when are we going to talk about the fact that the Dubros are the worst people on the face of the earth? Wait a second. Let's build up to that. Okay, so let's go back to the party. So everything's still going... Wait, wait. We're in Bali. There's Bali music playing. There's an elephant

statue. Go. Kodo to Bali. And everything is more or less polite. And it's Tamara who I believe cast the first stone. Wasn't it Tamara? Yes. She said that to Lizzie. Yeah, she goes at... Again, she goes at Lizzie like what what are you gonna admit about what you said about my husband as if Tamara hasn't said like so many worse things to all the husbands you know and

what I love is um you know Lizzie actually really stands her ground with Tamara and I really appreciate that and I really liked Lizzie taking tamra to task about the um oh because tamra got mad at lizzie for saying something about mexican italian babies right right and she she got mad that lizzie said that she's like how could you say that when you know my baby situation and i love that lizzie's response in the in the interview was i don't feel sorry for tamra's baby situation she has four kids she's been married three times I think she has plenty of babies. She's almost 50 years old. She's fine. Really? Lizzie looked great in this episode

as did her husband who was like, by the way, you were playing a game and you altercate way too personally. Like, that was too much of a reality check for all these crazy bitches. Shouldn't he be the one who's angriest of all? God. He's like, whatever. I mean, Tamara is... The fact that she would even pull the baby card like that but

don't you also see how like every time especially this season that she's gotten into a fight like this where they've been in a group situation with couples eddie never comes to her defense or chimes in because he knows he's married to a fucking asshole well he doesn't want to scare away his beard yeah exactly your beard can't just up and run away from you. I love that he not only stays quiet, he tells her, oh, go to bed, Tamara. Well, the thing with Tamara, actually, what makes her so pathological is that she, across the board, wrongs all these women. And then when the women get mad at her for wronging them, she, instead of taking responsibility for it, sometimes she'll say she's taking responsibility or she feels awful. What she really does, though, is then she starts to build a case on why she doesn't like them, you know?

Right, right. So we saw that with— With the Shannon thing, right? Like, they kept cutting to Tamara, like, in the confessional going, like, I really want to mend my relationship with Shannon, you know? Like, I really—I know that I did her wrong. It's like, no, no, you don't want to mend anything because you're awful. Yeah. Yeah.

Because from the moment that Shannon called out Tamara and said, like, I'm really upset at you that you told Heather this stuff, which, again, as I always like to point out, came on the heels of Tamara yelling at Heather for spreading privileged information. As soon as Heather said, I'm sorry, she's like, like well guess what I heard about Shannon you know so as soon as Shannon confronted Tamara about that that's when Tamara started the campaign against Shannon but then why well why was Heather so dis I mean Heather gets disgusted by like such ridiculous things but she was revolted by Shannon talking to Vicky on the airplane ride home and saying like you better you better be careful of Tamra. Like, Heather took that to such a crazy level because guess what? But Shannon did the exact right thing. Vicky is somebody who keeps falling into the Tamra trap multiple times.

And clearly Shannon has watched that on DVD on Bravo over the years. And it's kind of just like, you know what? You should warn Vicky that you keep dancing with the devil. Because you know what? You should warn Vicky that you keep dancing with the devil. Because you know what? Heather hates Shannon. And because she hates Shannon, you know, anything that Shannon does is going to piss her off. Heather hates Shannon so much that she made the biggest possible mistake, which is putting all of your bets on Tamra fucking Jax. Yes, that's a great point. She made herself look like the biggest asshole ever

because when you side with Tamra Barney, a.k.a. Tammy Sue Veith, you are an idiot. And she's an idiot for thinking that Tamra's not going to come after her next season because Tamra sees that people hate Heather now. And she's an idiot for wearing those hideous, evil, C-word bangs in the reunion. Cut fitness bangs? You know it.

Oh, you mean Heather's bangs. Oh, my God. Yes. I mean, Heather, she's like Magica Dispel with longer hair. And Shannon, poor Shannon. I don't know what she did to her face, but it made her look older. It was bad. Very bad decision on Shannon's part.

Okay, we need to talk about um how much i hate uh terry dubrow and how i actually thought that david shannon's husband gave a real apology and this is all the way back to earlier in the season when they were having their breaking ground party and they were all getting drunk at this party i don't care if there were little children and adults there there was an open bar and people drink thank you an event thank you when there's an open bar and there's a mechanical bull people are going to act like wild crazy people. Have you ever been to Saddle Ranch, motherfucker? If you're going to have

kids there, don't have an open tequila bar. If you have an open tequila bar, don't have kids there or separate it out time-wise. Or how about just don't throw a party because you're digging a fucking hole in the ground. Thank you, Ronnie. Amen. No one gives a fuck about you like why should you care that your husband makes a ton of money bitch you did not

make that money okay you made five dollars on hawaii 50 so shut the fuck up and stop bragging about shit you never accomplished okay and how about the fact that if anybody said anything offensive it was eddie not david yeah it was He was like, yeah, show us how you ride Terry. Right, so you know what? He also said that in front of the grandmother and the children, but you know what? Because they've decided to, you know, side with Tamara and Eddie, they

will never get blamed for it, and Shannon and David have to take all the blame, and I think it is complete bull-fucking-shit, and if Andy does not show that clip in the reunion, I'm going to freak out here's the thing I was going to say you know what here's the thing all these people on this

show and a lot of people that we see from Orange County on this show are tacky ass motherfuckers if I may use a word from Heather from New York they are tacky ass motherfuckers so when you invite these trash sorry to talk in gang terms everyone but when you invite these this is not the ghetto sorry to talk in gang terms everyone but when you um when you invite trashy people over to your place you're gonna hear

trashy things especially when you give them a lot of tequila so don't be so surprised okay that's all my you know i really hated that terry was like oh yeah you're a construction guy and i know you're used to like catcalling women and acting disgusting. It's like, what the fuck, you piece of shit? Yeah, it was actually really... You make someone for not being a doctor? You're openly making for someone not being a doctor. It was really, really offensive.

My father works in construction. All of my dad's best friends work in construction. I thought it was disgusting that he would say this, and he is that asshole who all he does all day is rejuvenate vaginas and give people breast augmentations that don't need them. So shut the fuck up. You are not better because you're a doctor.

You're a piece of trash who stars on that other fucked up show about botched people. You are disgusting. You fucking glue together fuck puppets for a living to keep old men happy, you asshole. Shut up. At least that guy's building a house. Yeah, when he told David to look up sardonic, it was such an asshole move and then you saw like heather smirk like that's my husband i mean i love when vicky said in the interview yes like this is this is the problem with that that we keep on telling heather about is that she's being condescending and here

she's doing it again and you know heather's gonna watch this footage and she's not gonna see herself as being condescending she's not standing up see herself as standing up for righteousness and I love that Vicky has come to the realization that these people are fucking bitches like Vicky is crazy and a disaster and her whole world is a mess between Brooks and Brianna all of that but at least Vicky can see when people are being assholes why did

remind me again why did Terry start yelling at David what did David say that got that got Terry going it was all back to the, he thought the apology was fake, and when he said, to spread the legs on the bull, spread the legs on the bull. No, I know that, but like, when they were talking at the dinner table, because the apology happened before dinner, and then they were at the dinner

table, and then Terry went off on David, I just can't remember why. And called him a penis? He said, we have a term for you in medicine, it's called penis! Because it came because the women were talking, it wasn't about stupid Terry. Yeah, yeah exactly and the dubros came ready to fight i mean they just came ready for the finale fight and they were like what do we have for the finale fight this is a big show you know which they always do on these finales they always have their big fights or whatever

and i remember the first season they were on and the party was also at vicky's house and she was wearing socks and rock or rocks and socks, boobs. Oh, that was so disturbing. I will never forget that. No, no. And she was having this party. No, it was at Heather's house. That's right.

The first season they were on. It was their first season. Yeah. Outside. And Heather was so excited to be fighting with somebody. And she was getting all dramatic about the cake. That was like the cake rape. And then she was sitting down and fighting

with Jim Bellino. And they were like laughing. They were having so much fun calling Jim Bellino a piece of shit. Which he is. But I just remember thinking you guys have so much glee. And you're just being awful. And they've just grown into monsters. I mean, this year they came and they were just ready to rip it up.

And when David said, oh, so now I'm white trash because I'm in construction. And Heather's like, he did not say that with her, like, finger straightening his face. I was like, these people are the worst. And you know what? I'll tell you right now. Those people were pointing. Both of the Dubros were pointing their finger. If I was standing, if I really was on the other end of that, I would have ripped her bony

ass finger off of her hand. I would have really hurt that bitch. Yeah, I mean... Like, I have a lot of anger issues. I would have hurt her. Oh, I love it. I mean, they're just, they're two vile, vile people, basically. And they're just like,

what have you done? Like, that's what kills me. Like, Terry, I get it. He's built something. But, Heather like what have you done like that's what kills me like terry i get it he's built something but heather what have you done like you haven't even raised your children you have like 20 nannies you can't even fucking cook like what do you do all day i mean right and then i'm out of practice and scare children when they're trying to sleep and they try to do those like little like interstitials where it's like oh like those little silly things they do it always at the 40 minute mark and it's like um yeah i'm so sorry that i have somebody you know i can afford to have a cook cook my dinner oh wait i'm not i have to i have to make a comment about that interstitial because what cracked me up was that all the quote-unquote apologies were over stupid things like i apologize for people who uh like stemless wine glasses and everything was like

this minor shit whatever and then vicky in the middle of it goes uh i'm sorry for like confusing italians and mexicans and i was like whoa whoa that's at a whole different level i'm sorry i'm sorry for chinese whispers yeah i'm sorry i like when she's like i apologize to the entire state of oklahoma. Oklahomians. Yeah. Well, that was the classic. Leah taught us this part where it's the classic after the season has been airing and they see everything happening. They give them one last chance to go into the interview room. And they take all those interviews and then they start using them throughout the season so that they can start defending themselves, which is where all of the Tamara, like all of this Tamara being like nice and trying to say, oh, I really like Shannon.

Right. That was her saying the first three episodes. Yeah, exactly. That was after she knew that Shannon was already popular. Like Vicky's apologizing to Oklahoma because she's taken a lot of shit from Oklahoma. You know, you don't fuck with those people. My God, they might not run to you, but they'll shoot you. Yeah.

But I was so worried going into this finale that like, you know, I hate Heather more than any housewife ever. Tamara is right up there, too. And I was getting to this point where I was like, oh, my God, Heather was the devil for the first half of the season. And now they're flipping it onto Tamara. I can't have this season end with Tamara being the only villainess in this group. But you know what? Heather came through as the biggest bitch ever. And isn't that why this season is so amazing?

Because there is this great evolution of the villainy and I love the way that the role that Tamara played in the beginning and then towards the end. And I loved how, I loved, again, I said this last week, it was a slow build of bitchiness in a certain way because it started, you know, in the beginning of the season,

you know, we had issues with chairs at Mexican restaurants, you know? And then you get to the end and it gets to this shit that's just like really like intense and like pertains to marriages perhaps falling apart and things being said about like other people's wives. And to me, that is like real drama. It's not like, oh my God, I heard a rumor about you breaking up a marriage in New Jersey.

You know, it's like that's not drama. Right. No, you're right. And, you know, you marriage in New Jersey. You know, it's like, that's not a drama. Right. No, you're right. And, you know, you mentioned the Mexican restaurant. Again, this is something that if it's not played during one of the reunions, it's going to be a serious problem for me because half of this season was built on the fact

that Heather felt that she was being screamed at by Shannon in two different places, the Mexican restaurant and at the party, neither of which times she yelled or screamed at her. She did raise her voice slightly. But you know what? If she can't have that played back and the camera put on her face and saying, can you explain how this is yelling?

I'm going to be pissed. Exactly. Especially when Shannon actually did apologize for at least the second occasion for saying, I'm sorry that I upset you in your house or whatever. I wasn't meaning to yell. I thought my voice was great. She apologized. And as she said last night, she's like,

I feel like we're always having to apologize to the Dubros. I mean, has anybody ever had a better, and not from the very first season, but has any newbie across any of these come in and had a better first season where, one, we like her, B, the general audience likes her she c3 is clearly getting another season and four like is not a horrible person shannon is has the best first season ever for a new does i think i mean closest closest probably kenya more maybe

but the thing is you sort of hated her actually you know another close one which it's easy to forget now because ties have changed or tides have turned but um brandy had that kind of season she came on and she was like a total instant hero because she was sticking up to those witchards cunts i feel i feel like this is a yahoo tv blog that i need to do before buzzfeed does it like the best first season from a newbie i know i'm like thinking back in my head. I'm thinking – Anyway, the point is this. I think that Shannon and David really made themselves look like class acts. And as much of a class act as you can make yourself look like during a finale where you know that it's been scripted to have a fight. And I liked how she sat there and said, you know what?

Three months ago, I would have lost my cool. I would have been screaming right now because you guys keep telling me that I'm a liar but i'm just sitting here and i'm able to remain calm because i'm okay with it yeah and she's like let's just why are we acting like this to each other let's be in a positive place and the de bros look so mad that they're because they exactly because like you said ronnie they were there wanting to fight. And they kind of just got shut the fuck down. Yeah. So now they can go back to their carport and complain about her in private. Because they basically lost.

Yep. But they surround themselves with yes people. So they'll never know the difference. And they're also delusional. I mean, we saw it last season on The Reunion. Oh, by the way, Gretchen. Gretchen had a great first season. How aboutchen, Gretchen had a great first season. Let's,

how about that? Gretchen had an amazing first season. Do you guys miss, um, you know, at the beginning of this season, I was really concerned about missing jugs, him alone,

whatever Jesus jugs and, uh, Gretchen. But by the end, you know, I still miss having Gretchen a little bit in the mix. I don't really miss slate as much, but this season was so great that I think it's fine. I am hearing that Lizzie is not going to be invited back in the mix. I don't really miss Slade as much. But this season was so great that I think it's fine.

I am hearing that Lizzie is not going to be invited back in full capacity. And I'm also obviously hearing, you guys heard this, that Tamara, because she's revealing all these secrets, because she knows she's claiming she's getting a bad edit and she doesn't like being the villain, that she talked all this shit about Bravo

and they're not going to deal with her diva antics anymore. But part of me is like this. You keep Lizzie in a reduced role. You maybe bring in one more. You've got to keep that other core intact. Tamara will be back. Yeah, Tamara will be back. As much as I hate her,

I feel like this show cannot exist without her there. She is probably the slickest villain on all the housewives because she knows we say this all the time every season she knows exactly who to turn against and it always creates drama even on the dull seasons of oc she knows exactly who to turn against every single time well tamra is an awful human being but that's why she's on the show i say lizzie's awful she brings nothing she's a fake bitch. All the shit she caused.

She actually made me side with Tamara a couple of times. I know. And nobody wants to watch her be pregnant next season. Nobody gives a shit. I don't want to sit there and listen to her talk about her birthday. The thing with Lizzie is that I actually feel like she's pretty smart. And I like

the way that she defends herself when needs be, but she spent too much of the season being like oh my god being a mommy is so hard but what I've learned to do is I put one kid to sleep first and then I put the other one to sleep it's like okay the other thing is we all agree I know the three of us agree on this

nobody wants to watch young girls on these shows if you're not well into your 40s with a lot of wine coursing through your veins I don't give a shit about you. Yeah, they just don't get along. They can't bond the same way. It's going to be a show about young women. Do it.

But 45-year-olds don't hang around with 30-year-olds. Exactly. Yeah, I think she's terrible. And at least she was nice in the first part of the season. But then when she tried to get her housewife stuff in and just be a cunt just to be a cunt like to get screen time i was like you know you're just another one and you're not even an entertaining one so just get out of here i don't like her i would rather have bolino back i thought she was hilarious oh she was hilarious but she couldn't the problem though with her she could not even be in the same like heather could not be in the same room with

her without ripping her to shreds and it was just like it was funny at first but then it just got really sad. Heather is terrible. I cannot watch Heather. I want Heather gone. I think they should get rid of Heather, Lizzie and keep the rest of them and then get somebody you know keep a couple of you know get a new kook

for next year. Can I tell you she's so awful that like you have to have her there. Heather is also going to say that she got such a terrible edit and they made her into the villain this year, so she's going to come back next year being extra fake, but you know after three episodes, her true inner asshole is going to come

raging right out, and we're not going to be able to restrain that. Heather doesn't even try and hide it. That sorry thing, and you already mentioned it, but her actual quote was, I would like to apologize to everybody that I have a chef and you have to cook. Oh, never mind. I'm not sorry.

Fuck you. No one was mad that you have a chef. Everyone's mad that you're so fucking pretentious that you can only talk about your husband's money, bitch. The only thing that could have made this season or next season better when we're talking about casting is after this big dinner party, Vicky has the final 10 minutes. She's saying goodbye to Ryan and Brianna

who are taking the baby to Oklahoma. When Vicky is sobbing and walking back down away when they pull away in their truck, the only thing that could have happened to make my heart sing was if Gina Kehoe had walked out and hugged her and said, neighbor, I'm always here for you.

And then Gina is back next season. That would have been the best thing ever. Yeah, that would have been an amazing cliffhanger. Come on, if this shit is scripted, why didn't somebody do that? That would have been brilliant. That would be pretty amazing if they brought Gina back. It's time.

It's time. She will fight that Tammy Sue. Yeah. It would be fun if they just started bringing back a bunch of the originals and stopped hiring new people. Well, clearly that's happening. Quinn.

Not Quinn and her wig. But you saw how they downgraded Luann because of that whole Jacques situation. But now Luann is still back. The fact that they're letting Adrian Maloof come back for a little bit of Beverly Hills here and there. They are definitely open when a show is starting to drop in the ratings slightly or they feel like they need to do some fresh casting. They used to not be open to that as a possibility. They're clearly open to that now. There clearly is a chance for Bethany to come back.

There clearly is a chance for Gina to come back. I really see this being something that we're going to notice over the next year or two because as these shows start to gray a bit, yes, Atlanta's ratings are through the roof, but the rest of them are starting to gray a bit. Not in our hearts and minds, but in the ratings they are. If they need to revitalize, bring back the classics. And frankly, in our hearts and minds, too.

It's the same circle over and over. It's the same storylines. It's the same bullshit over and over. I'm sick of it. And frankly, I hope they take this OC tack, which is to kind of make it a little bit more positive. Like the fun parts are really not the huge fights. The fights are pretty, they're fun occasionally.

But the most fun I have is just watching them being Froot Loops. What is wrong with you, number one? The fights are amazing. And why would I watch the show if they didn't have them? Well, Melbourne doesn't really have them, and that's one of my favorite ones. I think it's hilarious. That's a perfect example of just getting really kooky women

and just watching them be funny. One thing Slade said that was interesting at that party was that, because I didn't really talk to him that much, but one interesting thing he said, he was like, you know, the show was created by someone from Groundlings, which is a comedy. For those of you who don't know, it's like a big comedy place. And it was created as an improvised sitcom. So it was supposed to just be funny.

And the second somebody had any conflict and people started going crazy on the Internet, they were like, oh, let's just turn it all into conflict and women fighting with each other. And that makes so much sense because it what it used to be light-hearted well and you do miss those moments of levity where you had like alexis trying to be like us you know a reporter like i do miss those moments every once in a while i will give you that well and that's why everyone should watch game of crowns because game of crowns is pretty much nothing but that with the occasional like past aggressive spat no they like literally fight on that show but i get like no but game of crowns i mean they'll have arguments but like most the episode is watching these women doing like stupid ass things like the like like the crowning of like

miss mrs rhode island and mrs massachusetts in that restaurant like that like that it has so many of those moments that you just can't help like remember the fashion show with like the kid fashion show that was that was like bella singing a song called lol i mean yeah that's that shit was rich yeah and i think that that's one of the reasons that big like shows like big brother are always consistently good even on the boring years because the people aren't trained yet on what to do necessarily. And they're just kind of being themselves and making asses out of themselves. And that is so fun to watch.

It really, really is. I have to split here in a second. But because you just mentioned Big Brother, I will just say that for all of you listening, I hate Frankie with all of my being. Oh, I tried with him. Whatever guy walked past the Big Brother house a few nights ago and screamed over the wall when Frankie, Caleb, and who was

the other one with them? Frankie, Caleb, and maybe it was Cody. What happened? Frankie, Caleb, and who was the other one that they mentioned? And Zach. And Zach were playing outside. And a guy walked past and screamed over.

And they actually heard them. And you could see their faces react to this after dark or on the live feeds. And the guy said, Caleb, we all hate you. Zach, we all love you. And Frankie, you're disgusting. And I was like, you are my hero. Wow. You are my hero.

I don't hate Caleb as much as I used to. To me, he's just like a doofus. He's like middle of the pack to me. I agree. I thought he was going to be way more offensive at the beginning of the season, but he's totally whatever. He would have been if Amber had stayed in. I mean, that guy's one of the biggest pig misogynists I've ever fucking seen.

No doubt. But I'm kind of like checked. Like with Nicole gone, I'm kind of checked out. Well, no, I'm, well, here's the thing. Frankie, in the beginning of the season, I was like, when he first appeared, I was like, ugh, this guy is the worst. He's like, typical like, drama club

theater queen type that's like, just so annoying, only wants attention. And then as the season went on, I was starting to think, you know, he's actually like, pretty smart and when he's like, not aware the cameras are on him, he's like, all right. He's not smart. The rest of them are just stupid. But he is like crafty.

But then now that he has unleashed the Ariana Grande secret, he has now actually become so insufferable. It's like he has actually unleashed his hidden self. And he is so annoying. And everything he says sounds like an audition to be on a CBS sitcom. And it's like, when he calls himself an internet superstar or like a YouTube mogul, he actually said he's an internet. He's a social media mogul.

Disgusting. Do you remember? Do you remember? He was the one who got Leah black and trouble for making fun of mama. He was the one yeah he was the one doing like a mama elsa impersonation which admittedly we've done many of them but his was like oh i've got a stroke whatever he did his was like yeah he was holding his cheek open i mean the guy's just the thing with him like he's one of those gay guys who never has anything funny to

say he just says it really gay and jumps around a lot he's got this weird tick i just the guy i just the the whole thing with me is the ariana thing is cringeworthy he always has to be the center of attention and you want to talk about getting a good edit i mean the stuff that that guy says on the feeds and the way that he acts towards the other people is really gross and they make him like a saint on the show well Well, you know what? If he were cute, it would be different. But you know what? I'm not feeling it. And I will also say this. My girl of all girls,

Rachel Riley, was on the Eviction show. She looked amazing. She was hilarious. I love her to death. She and Janelle forever. And when Rachel was on the show, I wanted to play big booty with her. I love her and I was just sitting there like,

oh, this is great. She's amazing. She's amazing. But then she said she loved Zanky and I was like, Rachel, come on, girl. You should know that Frankie is disgusting in the worst. I liked Zanky in the beginning, but the novelty of it has kind of worn off for me. And in the beginning it was like, oh my god, this is amazing. There's like a

straight guy and maybe he's gay and all that. now i'm kind of like i'm over it i actually don't you know i like zach but i don't understand why people love zach as much as they do i mean i understand donnie i understand why people like donnie um and i like nicole but um i think that um i think that them lying about zach being amanda Zuckerman's cousin is so hilarious because they are so similar. Like, the way that he is such a bully to everybody and, like, openly mocks them and tries to make them cry on purpose. But then the second he loses a game, he's, like, literally crying. He's like, that's not fair. This is weird.

It's true. My biggest disappointment for the season was actually Christine because I loved her. I truly loved her in the beginning. And I thought that she and Nicole had a lovely relationship going on. And that Christine just sort of like was swept up by these two alliances. And instead of her reaction being like, ha, I'm going to be a spy and Nicole and I are going to take them all down. She just got caught up in it and betrayed her friend well all of those girls were idiots like I'm

not saying that an all girls alliance is gonna make sense for the entire show but if the women next season if they split it like 8 and 8 or 9 and 9 or whatever if the women don't look at these past seasons and go hey you know what we need to do immediately get rid of three strong dudes they're

fucking stupid. Because guess what? These women got obliterated. And Christine, there's no way she's going to the end. There's no way. Well, also, Big Brother this year did not really cast any strong female personalities. They all were kind of meek, you know? You know what?

It was getting good for Brittany right before her ass got kicked out because she was going to be the only one that was willing to fight the dudes. Yeah, exactly. And if these people don't immediately start to realize, I mean, Cody is so cute but so stupid and I just want to say if you guys, if you guys oh, with that hideous tattoo,

if you guys cannot see that Derek is running this house and has the money in his motherfucking pocket right now, you are idiots if you do not evict him immediately. Well, I loved when Amber was evicted, and she's like, the guys are just running the house. I'm like, yeah, well, guess what? Remember when Joey approached you in the beginning of the season

and said, let's do an all-girls alliance, and you were the one who didn't really respond to her, and as a result, it all fell apart? That's on you. And you got her kicked out of the house by telling the boys. Yeah, the girls not only are stupid, they actually got each other kicked out. And they actually gloat about it. Like, Victoria

gloats when she kicks a woman out. I'm like, how stupid are you? Victoria is really, truly one of the most worthless players we've ever seen. But all the women were. But how weird is this? But how is it weird that I'm rooting now for Victoria to kind of go far because I hate everybody else?

I kind of want her to go far because it'd be just hilarious if this total loser makes it to the end. I do love that Donnie keeps skating by, and I like that Donnie is smarter than he sounds. He's screwed. But he's screwed because he's not willing to break apart this alliance. He recognizes who's running the house. He sees what's happening, but he's not the type that will create cracks. The thing that made me so crazy is when they were in that dark box challenge and clearly he knew it. And he admitted that Christine threw the challenge and was giving her keys away or was not doing anything.

And he is the one who got all of those bones or whatever when they walked out of that house even though his ass is on the line like and he's clearly not going to win this show he should have just walked out pointed his finger in her face and said bitch you just screwed me over and I want everybody here to know that you threw that challenge and you're a terrible actress fuck you

it doesn't matter because they all knew that she was throwing the challenge right but I just wanted to do it but because he's not willing to go there like i can't root for him that much because he's just too passive like i agree it says something about my personality and clearly i get way too heated and i'm like a yeller no i'm not rooting for him either because of the same thing and also when he has made moves they've been so incredibly stupid and wrong and he's betrayed the wrong people like nicole will nicole that time was trying to work with wrong and he's betrayed the wrong people. Like, Nicole that time was trying to work with him

and he immediately goes and tattletales like, can you believe this idiot was trying to work with me? It's like, dude, you're not working with anyone and someone tried to work with you. How stupid are you? There are too many passive people on this cast and it is basically a cast where the passive people are willing to just sit

and let their faith be decided by a large majority. And the people in the majority are too myopic to realize that eventually, like, they, you know, they're gonna have to turn on each other and they may need those floaters to give them some numbers. And it'll be too late to realize that. And that's why I don't I didn't love this battle the block Block twist because I feel like it went on too long. And it also really incentivized these people to nominate the same people over and over and over again. I like the MVP twist. I like the idea that someone who is perhaps disenfranchised in the house, like Donnie is the most popular one. He would have been able to nominate someone every week secretly.

I love the paranoia that it creates. I like that it keeps the people in power on edge. And I think having three nominees, it just worked. It worked really well last season. Remember all the craziness we had last season because of MVP? And it didn't even last as long as Battle of the Block. Well, part of it was because last year there were such strong female personalities. But, you know, as we've learned from the Housewives shows, strong personalities on females can be very harmful. Like, last year, the strong personalities were a bully, which was Amanda, a racist, which was Aaron, an idiot racist, which was Gina Marie.

Who else? Like, there were so many stupid fucking racists on that show. So good. When you start saying that, I'm like, ugh, I miss it. I mean, I think the guys this season, there are good personalities with the guys on this season, but there's just no balance. I think there's no personality. I think it's just a bunch

of bland people who work out and have no personalities, and the only thing that keeps it is the little bits of drama in it or funniness and it keep me going but this is not one of my favorites i have to say i think i think that the the the men are well cast i do think that there is like drama and and personality there but i think the women it was it was a i don't know what cbs was thinking they really dropped the ball i mean i think the men are just trying to like play other big brother characters who have been on before and they literally talk about it they're like oh don't

pull a boogie man like let's do this and let's be like the uh let's name our brigade and let's name our alliance 20 different things and like keep having it's like we've already seen it you're not auditioning for something like be yourself like why are you trying to be other losers like they were losers in their own right right do you really want to do are you trying to be other losers like they were losers in their own right right do you really want to do you really want to be the meow meow really is that your goal exactly you need a little enzo in your life please just be original please here's where i think the casting really fell flat i think the casting fell flat with um uh victoria and jacosta and perhaps even joey because especially victoria and jocasta, because Victoria truly is not a reality star,

and it's not like she's someone who was quiet at the beginning of the season, now we're starting to peel away layers. It's not that. She's not stubborn. She's not emotive. She's not cute. She's not fun.

There's just nothing to her. She just sits there. Jocasta was like the same thing over and over again. She actually had personality, but she would only show it in interviews with like Julie Chen, you know. And the rest of the time she would sort of sit around and she would do nothing. She didn't scheme. She just said stupid things.

It's just like that was – if they had – Well, and also, I mean, give the boys some credit too. I mean, Cody is pretty terrible. No, but Cody plays a role because Cody is really hot and that's what Amber played. Amber was the hot one. You do need to have hot people. And there was that love triangle with Cody and Amber and Caleb.

Oh, come on. I enjoyed that. This show would be so much better if they cast some more people in their 30s and 40s and less dumb assholes that are too pretty in their 20s. Come on. I want some cute 20-year-olds, some 30-year-olds. How about a hot gay guy for once? You want Shelly smoking on a couch?

I love that. I fucking love that shit. I ate that up. You know what other season I like that everybody hated that I thought was just so hilarious was the season that they did in the wintertime. I love the winter season. Where everybody was supposed to be matched up. Like they were matching everybody up for a love connection.

Half of them wound up in jail afterwards. Oh my god. And it was that chick Sheila. That was Sheila and she was hooked up with that big cross-eyed troll who's in jail now. Who won. She was with the winner. Oh my god. That season was amazing. The season with Dick as much as he made me crazy on the show. That was with the winner. Oh my god. That season was amazing. The season with Dick,

as much as he made me crazy on the show, that was an amazing season. And by the way, if you guys are fans and you don't follow Evil Dick on Twitter, you are missing some hilarious shit. Oh, I love him on Twitter. He's so trashy and vile

and will call anybody out. It is hilarious. He still mocks Andy, which is hilarious. He goes after him like every day. As he should. He calls him horrible names. He goes after... Andy from last season? What was her name?

Kamika? Yeah. Jamaica. Jamaica with a clapping. Oh, my God. He goes after these people every day, and it is hilarious. And the people who follow him are just like him well you know and it's some good twittery well um you know my friend sylvia

she evil dick used to live directly across the hall from her and if you some of you well pretty much all of you don't know who my friend is but for those of you who do know you cannot imagine a contrast in personalities like Evil Dick and Sylvia. Yeah, she's like the epitome of class. Yeah, and the idea, she would tell stories and she'd be like, I came home and he was just there trying to shove trash bags into the chute as if he'd never even operated one before. I'm just like, Jesus, what is happening? I think there was one time when like I think she the thing is Sylvia represents everything that

Evil Dick would hate because she she doesn't he doesn't get a rise out of her or he didn't when he lived there she was just completely disdainful to him so I think there was one time when they like ran into each other in the hallway and he's like he's like hi and she was like

must you be always smoking cigarettes or something like that something like that and then just walked into her apartment and you just know that Evil like hated that cause he couldn't get a rise out of her he just was like she was like all the people he grew up with said no Evil like no

I love him that's why I love her alright um let us wrap this day up, shall we? Yes. Let me have some lunch. Thank you, guys. I had the best time. There is nobody that is more passionate about The Real Housewives of Orange County than myself,

and I could not have missed the finale without talking to you guys. Yeah, it was so fun talking to you. Soup's fun. I miss you. I miss you and your Chinese whispers. Oh, Matthew, we should do this in real life. Or as the Chinese people would say it. I'm never gonna dance again.

I'm never gonna dance again. Chinese whispers got me moved. Cashew chicken and pork. We saw Chinese whispers. We have to stop with the Chinese whispers. My husband's a rock star and he's gorgeous he's a silver chair Gina's favorite movie is Priscilla

see ya find us on Facebook facebook.com slash watch what crap ends or on Twitter at what crap ends find Ben at bsideblog.com or bsideblog at all the social media outlets Ronnie at RonnieKaram.com or RonnieKaram at all the social media outlets. Ronnie at ronniecarom.com or ronniecarom

at all the social media outlets. And life on the M-list, Matt Whitfield, on all of the social media outlets. We are moguls. We are moguls. Thanks, guys. And everybody who tuned in,

miss you guys. Hope all is well. Bye. Love ya. Bye, everyone. Bye, guys. If you like listening to comedy, try watching it on the internet. The folks behind the Sideshow Network have launched a new YouTube channel called Wait For It.

It's got interviews with comedians like Reggie Watts, Todd Glass, Liza Schleichinger. Schleichinger, I've been friends with her for 10 years. One of the funniest people out there, and I still have a hard time with the last name, Liza Schleichinger. Schleichinger, I've been friends with her for 10 years. One of the funniest people out there, and I still have a hard time with the last name, Liza. Our very own Owen Benjamin, that's me, takes you on a musical journey down internet rabbit holes and much more. You don't have to wait any longer. Just go to youtube.com slash waitforitcomedy.

There's no need to wait for it anymore. Because it's here. And it's funny. And I love you. On Monday, Josh Leibarger made his status Case of the Mondays followed by a frowny face. It got one like and five comments, including

dislike. Well, Josh, Geico also wants to make a comment to turn that emoji's frown upside down. In just 15 minutes, you could save hundreds of dollars on your car insurance by Josh, Geico also wants to make a comment to turn that emojis frown upside down. In just 15 minutes, you could save hundreds of dollars on your car insurance by switching to Geico. With all that extra dough, why not give Monday a makeover? We see an office party in your future hosted by you. Hashtag happy face. Hashtag savings. Geico. 15 minutes could save you 15% or more on car insurance. Hey, Prime members. You can listen to Watch What Crappens ad-free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today.

Or you can listen ad-free with Wondery Plus in Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey.