Watch What Crappens - #2409 PumpRules: The San Francisco Mistreatment

Episode Date: May 1, 2024

It’s time for the Vanderpump Rules (S11E14) cast trip, and this year it’s to beautiful, foggy San Francisco!  Will a sea lion attack Sandoval?  Will Schwartz injure himself on a mattress?  And will Ariana’s boyfriend interact with the cast?  Time will tell!Grab tickets for the Netflix is a Joke Fest in LA and our European tour at watchwhatcrappens.com Watch this recap as a video and get our bonus episodes at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crappens ad free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Hi, I'm Misha Brown and I'm the host of Wondery's podcast, The Big Flop. Each episode, comedians join me to chronicle one of the biggest pop culture fails of all time and try to answer the age-old question, who thought this was a good idea? Follow The Big Flop wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watch Watch Crappins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about.

I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today is the ever wonderful and hilarious Mr. Ronnie Karam. Hi Ronnie, how's it going? Hello Ben, how are you? I am fabulous because we're recapping Vanderpump rules today. And by the way, later this week we are going to be participating in Netflix is a joke on Friday at nine thirty in Hollywood at the Kukubara Lounge. It's actually the opening night of the lounge.

It's Katie and Walter who are our band. They just are our band for the crappies. They are the crappers. They are opening up a comedy club and opening night is on Friday so we're really touched and honored that they invited us to be there for opening night to perform on opening night and also that they you know we get to do it for Netflix as a joke. So please come and join us for that. It's gonna be a great time. Go to watchworkrapins.com to get your tickets. I think there's only like 20 left. It's like a very, very low number.

Maybe it's even sold out. You know what, who knows? But we are also gonna be in Europe, obviously. We're gonna be in London, Birmingham, and Dublin. I say obviously because we talk about it every day. But we're really excited and that's really around the corner. So join us for all these shows.

We're gonna have just like the best time and Of course patreon patreon.com slash watch for crap ins We are doing craps on demand. You can watch us in video. We have a fun time our bonus episode this week It's gonna be Vanderpump Villa. So if you like this Vanderpump content, there's more content on patreon Oh, and lastly, I forgot to mention for our show this Friday We are going to do something a little different but it's going to be super fun which is that we are going to recap an episode of House Hunters. It'll be like a live Duel of Hello. We think that everyone will

really enjoy that because we always have a hell of a time doing it every other week so we will have details about that episode coming up. We'll announce that on our social media so keep an eye on it you're up for that and that is all that is fit to print let us get into Vanderpump rules ah Thunder pump bro so big tree are cast so yeah it's a vacation Vanderpump rules has not had the best luck with their vacations the past couple of years. Let's think back, shall we? The last one they had was Reno, not Reno. Where was it?

It's a place like Reno but pretty. They went to Tahoe. Tahoe. They went to Tahoe. Last year we had Katie's girls trip from purgatory. I wouldn't even call it hell. Cause I feel like hell fire is more exciting than that trip. That girls trip they took to, wasn't that also to Tahoe?

Um, wait, which the girls trip was to Lake Havasu. They're really hit in a regional Southwest. Yeah. I don't need to list them all. Cause I can't even remember them. Cause they were tepid. It's like all Southwest. Yeah. I don't need to list them all because I can't even remember them because they were tepid. It's like, but it's like all Mexico. Yeah. This one's, what I was not, it wasn't very promising going in. How did you feel? Did you feel like they were just going to let rip Warren cut the cord, have a great time? I did not, I don't see this cast meshing with San Francisco.

It's like a weird thing. First of all, it's cold and foggy up there at all times of the year. And this cast is like a warm weather, fun in the sun kind of group. So I thought that was going to be already like a bit of a culture clash just with the weather. And then also just like people up in San Francisco are just like, well, there's a whole, there's like a Northern California, Southern California rivalry where like people in NorCal hate SoCal and people in SoCal I think don't really think about NorCal in that way that much but NorCal people hate SoCal and Vanderpump rules is like the epitome of SoCal so you send them up there and

you know that everyone up there is gonna be like griffs people from Los Angeles and on top of that they're also not gonna know what to do it's like oh here's a city full of like culture and sophistication like how do we do this like what do we do with these bars? And there's tech bros like tech bros are tech bros are like the sand of alls of technology. So like there's that going on. So I was, I just, I had low expectations for this as a destination for this group. Well, you were correct. So let's get into it.

So we start at something about her, which is a restaurant that we're pretending is is a thing. But I did hear that it is opening. It's opening in May, which of course is when they start shooting because, you know, that's how we roll. But that's cool to hear that it's opening. I'm glad. I always believed it would open. What about you? I'm going to say that when Jesus comes, by the way, I always knew Jesus was going to come. I always believed it, even though I kind of don't, must be honest. It's going to be an open faced sandwich. They should actually have a tartine or something

that's like, we're finally open faced sandwich. I mean, I thought I always knew they would open because is it really that hard to open up a sandwich shop in like a three square foot space? Yes, with Los Angeles laws. Yes, apparently it is. Yeah. So I thought for a moment that they weren't going to be opening cause someone posted a Tik Tok of it being like a gallery space, but um, it's opening. So that's cool. Like I'm excited for them. I, I, I've been, I've been excited for this for like three years, like literally three years.

I I've been wanting these sandwiches. Yeah. Well guess what? You're going to get them in May, May something or other. Yeah. So yeah, that's going to happen. Might not be with chef Penny guys, which we find out a little bit about later, but right now we have everybody's favorite personal assistant and behind the counter. It's Arianne and Katie. Oh my God. I can't believe it's you. I don't even know if I really work here, but it's good to be here. I just wait here behind this POS

system hoping I get to see celebrities and here they are. Hold on, the bus is stopping! Everybody get out your camera, okay? This is their personal life. Don't make them feel uncomfortable. Click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click. Yeah Ann is so excited. It's never really even confirmed that she's working there. She just is there. She's like, hi, oh my God, I can't believe it. They're here in the flesh. I don't have to pose photos with those cutouts anymore.

It's amazing, hi. So the place though is still- Yes, Ariana, I will do your grocery shopping. Gladly, you don't even have to pay me. I know you didn't really hire me as your personal assistant, but I'm practicing on this tuna hoagie. I have an idea for a sandwich. We can call it the hand sandwich

and you guys can be the bread and I can be in the middle of the sandwich, oh my God. So there's an awning line across the dining room and Ariana's like, remember when we thought we'd be opening the restaurant right about now? Well, we were so young, so naive. There were so many code violations. The city made us demolish our patio. Hold on. I'm going to do, I'm a cover band today. Let me sing a Katie song. Hold on. She goes, we're basically at square one, which is funny because there was like a restaurant

called square one. And so they are like literally so far from it. So then producers like, so when do you think something about her will open? I'm going to impel myself the next time someone asks me that question. Like, basically, it's like, cuts up, basically Lisa Vanderbump in five seconds. When are you going to open? So Lisa walks in and then Anne, Anne who was so excited for like Ariane and Katie is like,

Lisa Vanderbump, nice to meet you. She has already, she's like left that counter. She is, it is just like a cloud of dust and she is already just like up on Lisa Banner from says hi It's me and I'm the new assistant one the oldest system was fired, but now I work at the sandwich shop I'm missing a sandwich I will stand out the front with the truly thing and I'm gonna throw it in the air be like sandwiches here sandwiches here It's nice to meet you Darling, where do I recognize you from sit the back of a milk carton? No, no, I would be so honored.

I love milk, milk is so great. Have you ever asked milk to sign your autograph? I have, I literally have. Was it in the post office, darling? Was it your picture above one of the cash registers? Haven't committed a crime. Unless the crime is loving you. Take me to jail.

Arianna's like, yeah, no, and working with us now. And I feel like it's like a really good fit because we're just like a female centric business, you know, women supporting women pushing out other women, bringing in new women, that kind of thing. Women fighting over trademarks. Women having contract issues. Women centric business, specifically younger women

who don't try to steal LLCs from other women. Okay. Women who aren't named after very small currencies. Women who are named after things that still exist and are not just rusty in the bottom of fountains for wishes that never came true for literally anybody who ever threw one in there. Give a woman, take a woman woman but not that kind of woman if you know what I mean. In Penny's case, there was something about her and it was very, very smelly.

So we got rid of her. We hate her now. She's dead to us. But these are women we support. These women. So I'll be pissed like, oh, and it also gets kinda back at Chomp, booo Chomp. Do we have a sandwich yet named Forgive Miss? Is there, is there? Let's serve that up, shall we? Anyway, new person, nice to meet you. You can stop hugging my leg at this point.

I love blue, it's my favorite color. Also clouds are so funny. Do you think God shapes them on purpose or do you think that we're just pretending that they're shapes so we can try to understand them better? All right, when I said nice to meet you, that meant leave, leave, get off of my ankle strap. That's rich person talk for get out of here.

So Anne goes, all right, well, I'm gonna go organize something in the back. We don't have a back and okay and you're just we see your pantomime and putting things on a shelf back there. Okay. And that's my trunk. That is my trunk and I'll just be back here in the store room. Don't forget me. And we don't have an elevator. So I don't know why you're even trying to pretend like we have one. Oh, she's missing behind, look, she took the elevator below the counter. Uh-oh, I left my key card out here.

I can't get out of this glass box. We have to get Ann out of the box. Sorry, Lisa, we have to do this every day. All right, Ann, we freed you. So when are the doors opening? And they're like, well, the contractor's coming over tomorrow because there's some health department issues. Oh, darling, who doesn't have health department issues?

Have you seen Joe? Joe started his first day with gangrene, darling. He's still there. The health issues are just, it's like putting salt on the food in this town, darling. I mean, have everyone so specific about health. I mean, is it so wrong that you leave glasses of water from one table for the next guest to sit at the table? You know, people talk about communal tables. What about communal water? So wrong!

I'm married to a health violation, darling. He's in a Rod Stewart wig and he buzzes around the house on a Roomba. So many health violations. Sounds like excuses to me. All right now, I know what he's doing. He's gonna come fix your drain. He's gonna put rollers on the refrigerator. You know how I know all of this? Because I've spoken to Penny.

You want to have a talk with mommy Lisa? We don't talk about Penny. So they're like, mm-hmm. You guys aren't speaking to her though, are you? Naughty, naughty, naughty. That's like going into TomTom and not taking in the beautiful swinging pendulums of Maestro Nicolay's work, how could you?

And they're like, yeah, well, Katie's like, well, she proposed that she wanted a salary plus a percentage. And so we sent that to our lawyer. And Arianna's like, yeah, and we are the sole owners of this business. And she's like, but she's going to be a partner, right? She just told me.

Partners in crime. The three amigas. Ladies for ladies. There's something about them. There's something about us. There's something about we. There's something about Penny's friends. Just all the names of the restaurant up in lights.

I'm seeing them already. And they're like, no. Oh, oh, so she's not going to be a partner, so I can't Trojan horse all my ideas into this restaurant. Well, I shall take your voices and your souls. Good day! Oh, pssh, magic! Might be the wrong time to tell you she's hired Max.

She's hired Max. She's hired Max. Max just shows up on a hairnet. I heard you've got a drain problem. And walks in in the costume as a drain. I'm the drain. I'm a little drain short and stout. So yeah, Chef Penny tried it.

Basically what I've heard, and I think this comes from Katie being on maybe Danny Pellegrino or she was on something. Or maybe her own podcast. I know she was on a podcast and talking, spilling the tea about Penny, right? Yeah. And yeah, they have a new podcast here in Dana. It looks good.

It's doing really well. They did a photo shoot. They look very professional. They're professionals. I've seen their photos. So anyway, they, what was I going to say? Stop making me think about Katie's podcast. They were professionals. I've seen their photos. So anyway, what was I gonna say? Stop making me think about Katie's podcast. They were actually shot by Anne Gettys.

And I'm like, what's happening there? Do I need to listen to this? Did you know their photo shoot was by Anne Gettys? It was literally like they said, Anne, get us. We need a photo. Okay, I'll be right there, Katie. She's like, okay, I'm gonna make you guys look like funeral cabbages.

Like babies dressed as funeral cabbages. No, so she was talking about it. Apparently, what's her buns? Chef Penny copyrighted their name, something about her under her own- She has the trademark. Yeah, she has a trademark. And so I guess she's holding the trademark hostage, so they're going to have to sue her or something.

I'm not sure. But then somebody else in the comments, because you know, I learned everything from Reddit comments. So I don't know what's true and what's not, but someone else was like, well, they hadn't trademarked the name and she told them to trademark the name and they hadn't done it. And so she trademarked it and she has an LLC. So she just did it under that. So I don't know if it's actually something nefarious now knowing Penny as I do, and that is not at all,

but only from television and television shows like the Food Network's next TV star, where Penny was a very sexy themed chef. I will say I don't trust Penny as far as I can throw her and I can barely throw a remote control. So yeah, what people who have not watched that season that she was on don't realize was that she was the villain that season. Chef Penny was a villain. And I need to go see if they have old episodes

of that show on Max because if I could, I always think about the photo shoot that she did where she either was holding up an apple or a pomegranate and she held it up to her face. Cause she's like, I'm Chef Penny and my culinary point of view is that I'm the sexy chef. And then she like put her back to the camera and then held the apple up.

And then it was just like, it was so strange. And Susie Fogelson was like, this is uncomfortable. I don't like this. I don't like this at all. No. Susie Fogelson flapped her hands. It was like, I'm not really understanding the apple. For everyone who like grapes.

Not feeling great about this. Yeah, that was some awkwardness. But you know, leave it to Vanderpump to just take something that could have been gone a long time ago and just keep shoving it in our face. Her other one is on the show right after this, Jax. So we can all go enjoy that later. Although Jax has a much better track record at entertainment than Penny does. But yeah, guys, Penny, I get that somebody is like, I'm helping you create this restaurant.

Lady, you're making a Caprese sandwich. You did not invent that, and you need to get your hands off that fucking name, okay? That name is bad enough that nobody wanted to trademark it, okay? That's why it wasn't trademarked, just leave it alone. Literally, nobody is gonna steal the name something about her, okay?

No one is going, honestly, and if they have to change the name, I don't think it's the end of the world I mean we all say it we all know it. I mean, it definitely has been some good brand awareness, but like just I Don't know. It's it's fine. It's fine We've decided I don't know what I'm talking about it could help is what I'm saying Okay, so let's see here But yeah also fuck chef penny And I hope these two get their

shit together and stop letting, you know, Food Network witches run over them. Also, something that's not pointed out here, Chef Penny was brought to them by Vanderpump herself, okay? Vanderpump is shoving Penny in their faces. So I think Vanderpump should take care of this. This isn't right to just be like, make Penny a partner. What did you tell Penny? Did you tell Penny that she was going to get to be a partner? I'll bet you did. I'll bet you did ma'am. We're going to drive by that sandwich shop and it's going to be renamed a Penny for your thoughts. A Peter for your a Penny for your Peter. Peter for your Penny. Peter Penny. Peter Penny. Peter Penny and Neverland.

Never Neverland with Peter Penny. Spelled P-I-T-A. Yeah. Peter Penny for your thoughts. It'll just be Penny dressed like Belle from Beauty and the Beast. The wrong basket. The completely wrong fairy tale. Come on Penny, get it together.

Peter Penny, starring Belle from Peter and the Beast. Max is dressed like Rumpelstiltskin. Like, oh, the fairy, come on, you need some consistency with these fairy tales. So Ariana's like. Get the red donut hood. My right donut. Donuts like.

Oh, I bet Penny loves the little red riding hood. I guarantee she loves putting on a big red cape with a hood. Ugh, that's probably her favorite. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappins commercial. I love a good parasocial relationship with a celebrity who will probably never know my name. I mean, honestly, who knows?

Don't count yourself out. But my favorite part about these feuds is how they're ignited by the tiniest things. Jada, I love you. G-I Jane too. Can't wait to see you. I accidentally laminated my brows too much. It starts small, and then it gets so big.

Hey, honest Naomi, I'm fearful of you to this day. I don't know her. We all just have to admit, we're addicted. Everybody has opinions. Everyone picks sides. Leave Britney Spears alone right now. From Wondery, I'm Sydney Battle. And I'm Matt Bellassai.

And this is Dis and Tell. La la la. Where we unpack why we get so invested in these feuds and whether or not our attention only makes the whole thing worse. Follow Diss and Tell wherever you get your podcasts. In the climate ravaged year of 2072, the city of Pura stands as a miraculous green haven, a geo-engineered paradise that protects fortunate residents from the global catastrophes of heat domes, fires, floods and droughts.

Demetria Lopez heads up Pura's public relations, tirelessly promoting the city's idyllic image. But when she stumbles upon a dark secret that if exposed would be the downfall of Pura's existence, she must decide who and what she is willing to protect. From Wondery, the makers of Academy and Dr. Death, The Last City stars actors Reyes Seahorn, Jeannie Tirado, and Maury Sterling. Follow The Last City on the Wondery app

or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of The Last City early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus. of the last city early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus. Okay, so they're still talking shit about Penny and they're basically like, yeah, she came in here and tried to gouge us, you know? And Katie's like, well, we brought her on

to be the back of the house, but we're having a little trouble seeing eye to eye what her role is gonna be in our business. She was just supposed to be there with Caprese inspiration. Silly says like, so do you want to part ways with her? Do we think this might hurt her? Is she going to be my newest broken bird? And Ariana's like, yeah, that's what we're trying to figure out.

Well, I'm sorry about that, because I know she really, really wants to be involved. And then give me all the insider gossip. I know she wants that. You know, I've always, and Lisa goes, I've always had a good relationship with Penny, and she can help the girls. For goodness sake, she's helped me.

And then we see a flashback of Penny helping Lisa Vanderpump. And we see it looks like it's at the Tom Tom tasting. And Lisa goes, oh, I hate food tastings. I get fatter and fatter. And Penny goes, well, if you don't taste it, how do you know what it is what you want? And then that was the clip.

I was like, that's Penny helping you with your restaurants? Penny told me you have to actually taste the food before you open the restaurant. Wow, she really is a magician. Explains so much about the food. Yeah, it does explain the food at those restaurants, for sure. Cause you often are like,

did anyone even taste this before putting it on a menu? Literally. The bus boy did, cause there is literally a bite taken out of it. Anyone else? Anyone in charge? She's revolutionary her approach to restauranteering is unlike any others She says you actually have to eat the food before you prepare it for people. I mean made me eat calories

She made me taste Joe's beet soup So then we go over to Kyle Chan's store and she was like, hello. And they are getting ready with the 27s, okay? My last good year to do this show for Kyle Chan because this is the year that Kyle Chan is gonna happen. Come hell or high water, fucking Kyle Chan is gonna happen. Someone is gonna make Kyle Chan happen, okay? Look at how much we've learned about Kyle Chan is gonna happen? Come hell or high water? Fucking Kyle Chan is gonna happen. Someone's gonna make Kyle Chan happen, okay? Look at how much we've learned about Kyle Chan this year.

We know he's homosexual. I never knew that before. Do we know that? I assumed, well, I always thought he was. Do we know that he's homosexual? I think he has a boyfriend. I don't know. Didn't he have a boyfriend today?

I think he did. I don't know. We know that he's a good friend. Okay. I literally forgot everything we learned about Kyle Chan. Fire him. I feel like Kyle Chan, Kyle Chan and Penny have some sort of cruel intentions thing going on and they're racing to see who can actually become a cast member first. And now Penny's face has set back and Kyle's like, ha ha. Because you know know Kyle was like undermining Penny by putting like little whispers in Ariana's ear

and Katie's ear like, you know, she's not very good at what she does. It's just like a crazy sandwich, you know? And he's like, I shall be the new friend of officially. The new sandwich has something about Chan. It's called blood diamonds, Peter. Doesn't even have a ring to it. Okay, how about this?

Blood Diamond wraps. Diamonds are a girl's best sandwich. So there's an internet personality, Blood Gorditas. Why are you obsessed with blood Carlton? Stop it. Saw Leo DiCaprio movie. It really started my journey, not gonna lie. Yeah, it was full of so much adventure,

but also political intrigue and Javan Hanzo. So there's an internet personality there named Pete and his name is spelled P-E-E-T like Pete's coffee. I'm like, was that Pete, a Pete's coffee? And then he doesn't say anything the rest of the time, but he got a chiron. So I just wanted to point that out, that there was someone named Pete

with his name spelled incorrectly. He wasn't an Amanda, so I don't care, okay? Yeah, so Sandoval shows up and he's locked out, which is always fun. And he walks in, so Sheena crosses her arms, like I'm angry, hey Pee P PP, LES, how you like them? And she's like, um, is Tom performing too? Or is he just helping with this? I kind of thought this was going to be like a Sheena Shea Marie,

like solo gig right now. And it's like, Oh dude, I'm just helping man. Cause like, well, I was thinking since he's done like 30 shows, he's pretty good at knowing, you know, what we needed events since we're not hiring a manager just for that. I mean, look at Tom, do it all himself, Tom. Tom loading in, doing all the, Tom hired a high school band to do everything for him. How the hell is Tom gonna know what to hook up,

what PA to hook up? I'm not buying this. Yeah, yeah, he's like, yeah man, I could definitely help out for sure. You can tell me if you need something and then I probably won't get it for you, but I will get you some cool purple lights. So, it'll be awesome, man.

I do have a glow in the dark lightning rod that you can wear around your neck if you really wanna make this a sick event, bro. And he tells us, Kyle, Kyle very specifically has been there for me hold on everybody I'm feeling things the cameras rolling right oh he has been there for me more than anybody and so if there's like anything that I can do to pay him back outside of actually paying him money I'm like yes yeah I owe him a lot he got me this like

awesome ring and he like saved me like $35 and I was like awesome man they're like are you crying he's like oh he's one of the coolest motherfuckers around the house don't take him away from me. Shut up, Tom. So, um, the sound of all gets Sheena sparkling water kind of sits behind her and she's like, thank you. Thank you. Hold on, I'm working on my voice. Tomorrow's a big day. I'll have one. Thank you. S-P-A-R-K-L-I-N-G. W-A-T-E-R. What'd you think about that?

It's like, ugh, she need to know. P-O-P-O-C-H-I-C-O. How you like that? She just spells out all the food items. So Kyle's like, well, I'm super excited. I'm just like a little worried about like, of what happened at the pool party. So you guys wanna talk it out

with your best friend, Kyle Channon, right here. Like suck it, buddy. You don't get to meet at any fights. So you guys wanna talk it out with your best friend, Kyle Chan, right here. Like, suck it, Patty! Ha ha, you don't get to meet yet in any fights. So, say it in a ball state. Guys, I know it's been rough, but you know what is rough? The life of a diamond before it becomes a diamond. Guys, let's squeeze this like coal.

Let's get this squeezed right now, guys, till it becomes sparkling again, just like your friendship used to be. Kyle Chan. And you know what? If if you guys really if you guys can just like squash this, then afterwards we can have lunch at Ruby Tuesday's jewelry. Hashtag jewelry.

So Santa Claus, like, OK, well, I'm sorry for bringing up that shit from years ago, you know, that you were a dumb slut who cheated with Eddie Cibriot. I shouldn't have done that and I want things to be good with Ashina. And she's like, I'm like, literally, the only reason why I wasn't going to put that song out last week, because I was like, Tom's definitely going through it now that this podcast has come out. Like, you literally made me reconsider whether or not I was going to put out APPLES. Okay, it's like a big deal because I could,

that was like a hypothetical and it really hurt my brand. I love she no talking as if she's like about to like push back the drop date of her single, like, like program managers across the nation at like our heart and like Citadel or whatever, or like, guess what? We're going to have to pause on our, our big rollout for the Sheena Shay single. And Bravo's like, oh my God,

we've already put Below Deck Sailing on hold. That way. Taylor Swift is like, but I already moved my Tortured Poet Society release from based around APPLES. I can't move it again. Tortured Corner Society. CORNER! It's me. Hi. I'm the Corner. It's me. Corner! So, um, she's like, yeah, but like, I was like, Tom's going through it because that podcast came out and the song was never about you, okay? Like I did throw a line in to make it about you to capitalize on for you after the fact,

but like there wasn't a line to capitalize on you from the beginning. And he's like, Oh guys, it's not the end of the world. I guess it's just like everyone's so weak to be like, why are there like lines drawn to the sand? You know, like relationships never end well. Why isn't my relationship just like everyone else's? Uh, seriously? I can't waste any time explaining to Tom

how this was worse than a relationship just ending. But if you want to know, Raquel's showing up to stage coach in clothes she probably stole from your girlfriend's closet while she was banging you. You fucking weirdo. Did you see that? I heard about this. Yes. I mean, it just never ends.

And someone asked her, where'd you get that shirt? And she's like, I don't remember where I got the shirt, but I probably just got it from some random store one time. And now there's going to be a special episode. We're all going to hear the Amber alert sound on our phones and look down. It's going to be a special episode. We're all going to hear the Amber alert sound on our phones and look down. It's going to be like, Rachel goes rogue has released a new episode about why she wore the same brown shirt Ariana wore one time to stage cut.

Well, I was looking in my closet and I had to go to stage coach and I was putting something on because you wear clothes places. And so then I put on a clothes and then people were like, why are you wearing that? And I was like, cause I have to wear clothes. It's the law. We gonna wrap this podcast. This is hello, this is Bethany Franko,

producer of Rachel goes rogue. I just want to say she would have worn some skinny girl clothing, but it is all sold out cause it's very popular. So I don't know. I'm not saying that it's creating demand, but if you want to buy some skinny gold clothing, get on the wait list.

Okay, thank you very much. Yeah, that was traumatizing. Right back after this commercial break. Almost as traumatizing as my divorce from, from what's his face. Yeah, we got divorced and I'm going to release three episodes. Oh, they're gone, they're gone. Just like my clothing.

So, where are we? Okay, so he's like being the victim as usual. And Kyle's like, guys, I'm not saying that everybody should forgive Tom, but he's so alienated, you know, and you don't need to torture him either. I would definitely like to be able to move forward where we're not like throwing each other's past each other's faces. That would be nice. And Kyle just starts going, yes, yes.

And Sheena goes, I mean, I don't hate you, yes. And like, I don't want anything bad for you, yes. And like, I miss you, yes. I miss you too, Sheena. I'm not yassing you anymore. You've taken enough of my yasses, but I'm happy for you. I'm glad I could facilitate this, Sheena. I'm not yassing you anymore. You've taken enough of my yasses, but I'm happy for you. I'm glad I could facilitate this, Kyle Chan.

No one is as friendly as Kyle Chan. Ding. Feels great being just one of the gang. So then we go over to Lala's apartment and Katie comes over, cause it's Lala's birthday. So Lala's like, can I tell you some things something? I was just like thinking about I hope that like Santa ball doesn't think he's like invited tonight's

Cuz like I need to call him to let him know he's not invited tonight to my things tonight Okay, he's like could you put it on speaker? It's like I want to hear what you say I'm like, what is he gonna say about it, too? Hi Santa boss. She's like, hi, I'm Santa Vos. She's like, hey, hold on a minute. Ah! Sorry, just had to finish that riff there.

All right, got it down. Sat, love. He's like, yeah, I'm here with Sheena. And Kyle-chan, best friend Kyle-chan. Yes. So Lala's like, oh, so it's you and Sheesh. Okay, that's like a little weird that you guys are being together because last time I saw you together you were

ripping each other's hairs heads off. So that's sort of like weird, a little bit. Yeah, and Carl Chan's like, you know what I think it, you know what I hear is weird? Rubber wedding bands. People really should give those up. Diamonds are important. Sorry, just an opinion of one best friend to another best friend. So Santa balls like, he's like, Hey, well, you know what ever seen pottery with like, break it and like glue it together with like gold. That's what we're doing right now. And Katie is like, I'm into crafting and even I wouldn't do that. Where am I? Okay. So Lala's like, I respect that. Can we leave my big three-three out of the gluing of the Potter race? And he's like, Oh, well, I wasn't invited. I mean, I wasn't

going to come. She was, yeah, well, I felt like you deserve to FaceTime rather than a text message. I'll see you guys in San Francisco. You're not invited still. Oh, Tom, hold on. Can I speak with Kyle for a second? Kyle? Yeah. Hi. I can't believe you're asking. It's shocked me. This is so Sapphire. Fire. She's like, Sapphire. Kyle. Tom's not invited to my party. He's like, damn it. You're such torturers. It's like Kyle was like, did you just get like, disinvited before you were invited, bestie? He's like, I mean, like, that was nice of him to put it that way. Am I right? Am I right?

High five everyone. It feels so great to be part of the group. And Tandoval's like, yeah man, I'm used to it. Well, I'm having a party. Yeah, it's like, I'm having a party. You're like, I don't want you to come. Like, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. That was called Period Ot. That's a gem for August. It's my birthstone.

Okay. So then, Lala and Katie are now walking to the party. Is this the same place they had the party last year? Remember when Lala, I thought it was her birthday and she yelled at Raquel and then Raquel went outside and then Lala came back out and was like, I've been the mistress. I don't want you to be the mistress too all the time. She's the mistress. No, I think that Lala's party last year's was on Sunset Boulevard and this one was on Melrose Boulevard. Well I don't know how they found a dead person who does burlesque, but this was a ghoul, right? This was this person living. What do you think?

It was chef penny. She's like, I'll get in the group one way or another. So, so basically, it's like Lala and she has like, you know, it's basically Lala and like, AIDS and various hangers on and whatnot. And Lala is just like, she's like, Oh, hey, everyone's. Well, I feel like, she's like, oh, hey everyone. Well, I feel like every year that comes, I become more and more fucking bad ass and like most people are terrified when they hit 30s and I'm just like, oh my God, where am I now?

This is like what it feels like to be a woman who really doesn't give a fuck, be soft with me. Be soft with me, because I'm soft right now. Be soft with me. I don't give a fuck. I'm so soft right now. You guys, hold on. Ah, ah. Her crying on Instagram live with her giant fingernails and her just like putting her

fingers straight up like finger guns and then like dabbing her face like this. She's like guys I have a baby now. I'm so soft. People are so mean to me on the internet and I'm so soft guys. I can't be any softer guys. Please don't be mean to me on the internet. By the way standby everything you fucking bitches, but I'm soft guys This is the face of someone doesn't give a fuck but I'm soft

Softly good on give a fuck So Jenna is there Jenna's like a big season. She's had three scenes this season This is probably the most she's ever had and she's like, yeah So Lala, what do you wish for your birthday? And she's like I just want to have a positive and soft pregnancies and then just like win custody's and just like have a great year, you know? Yeah and she tells, I think you already did that mine, so she's like yeah. Okay so then they go to this place and Schwartz shows up and he's

like oh my god this is sick I've always wanted to up and he's like, oh my God, this is sick. I've always wanted to come here. It's like burlesque. This is crazy. We're going to see boobies. I can't believe it. And so then this is when the dead person comes out and dances. I don't know if she's lit like this, if she took a bath in milk. I don't know what it is. It's jaundice. It's like a milky jaundice. I don't know what's going on over there, but I'm scared for this person. How is something about her getting shut down for an awning and this is okay? I mean, the nudity, I mean, the clear violation of the health code with whatever is going on with this person's skin. She looks ill.

Very pretty person. She looks very ill. Yeah, she was very, very, very, very like porcelain, porcelain white. So she's doing her- But I think it was makeup. That's why I'm making fun of it. I think it was. Because I'm not just making fun of someone's skin tone.

I think that they're purposely putting on that, I don't know why I'm so perplexed by it and bothered by it, but I really am. I was like, is this on purpose? Is this like a kink? I just don't get it. Like, is she looking dead on purpose? That's my question.

I just don't get it. I don't understand. I feel like the parade has passed me by yet again And there's something else in the world that I just don't understand and right now It's just like looking like you expired a couple of days ago, and you haven't been found yet But you're still somehow doing burlesque routines in the living room So this this lady is performing and then of course this is now Logan Logan number two's chance And he like leans over and goes, she's still wearing more than Lala.

So then, uh, Brock, meanwhile we learned something about Brock. So he's like very bashful. He doesn't want to look at the dancer and he goes, well, I was raised in the Mormon church until I was 14. Uh, then it turns out I've discovered the Mormon church was actually just a bunch of cows in the pasture. So it was all a lie. So there's a small little Mormon boy in me that gets very uncomfortable when there's a woman dancing around me or a cow that needs to be milked.

Yes, you're very innocent Brock. Okay. Can we go back to talking about your butt toys that she had packed on date night? Come on, come on you dirty guy. So then the dancers now are pouring water on themselves. Again, health code violations. I feel like the health code violations are aimed at the wrong places. That's all I'm saying. And then after the number shorts is like, whoa, are you gonna go to Tom Tom's show?

You know, I think that would be really great guys. Everybody easing into the Tom Tom pool. Come on guys, sound of a woo. Well, I can't, cause I don't like, don't wanna spend four nights away from summer. So I'm not gonna go, but James is going to go. And Lala's like, by the way, Ariana, I just want to get a little bit of credit with you because I told Sandra Balls not to come tonight.

So I think I'm the better friends. And you know, if you want, I can throw Sheena under the bus. In fact, let's do it right now. So sheesh, tell me why were you hanging out with Sandra Balls? Did you hear that, Ariana? I would say Kyle Chan's going over the performance for Friday in Sandvils, I guess, is like making sure all the equipment for the band is good to go. And basically I said, like, I'm going to need a microphone and some APPL.

So. And like he just like apologized to me. I just said, like, I miss you. And he had like tears in his eyes and I was like, I miss you too. And so like, if we could just like move forward in a way that we're like not going back to the past and potentially getting me a gig on Dancing with the Stars, I have like nothing else to say to him. Yeah.

So- And during this entire time, Arianna is just like, she's sort of like in the background and she's just sort of like rolling her eyes and making faces like awkward, whatever, a lizard. This is just, this whole thing cracks me up so much because she and this whole thing and I think one of the big things she goes off at the reunion about is like Ariana didn't protect me when all her stans were coming at me accusing me of trying to make up with

Tom and just forgive Tom and then at BravoCon she got in a lot of trouble because she was caught going into a party in Tom's room and so she was like, oh my god, everybody's like crucifying me. It's not that I'm friends with Tom, guys. I'm really not. I mean, you had a party and I went by to say hi. No, no, no. She's like so spineless that she was doing it this whole time. All this time since the show shot, she's been like, everybody's accusing me of being friends with Tom again. That's just not the case. It is the case. Why are you such a liar? We're gonna see it on the TV.

I mean, I get you probably don't want your house egged and everything else, but it's just funny that her whole thing is like, how dare you try and accuse me of being friends with Tom? Why aren't you standing up for me when people are accusing me of trying to be friends with Tom? Yeah, I was with Tom. It was great.

We decided that like we love each other. Yeah. And we're best friends. All right, I was like. We decided that like we love each other. Yeah. And we're best friends. Ariana's like, what is going on? It makes me feel like I'm being gaslit as if what happened was not as clear as day. And Lala's like, I think that there'll be a days where you'll be able to rekindle some sort of friendships.

Ariana's like, no, that day will never happen. So she's like, it has nothing to do with me. It has to do with the fact that he repeatedly treats Sheena like shit and doesn't give a fuck about her. That ain't your friend, babe. Dare I say, you in danger, girl. You in danger. You in danger, girl.

Commercials, here comes one right now. I'm Shimon Yai, and I have a new podcast called The Competition. Every year, 50 high school senior girls compete in a massive scholarship competition. I wouldn't say I have an ego problem, but I'm extremely competitive. All of the competitors are used to being the best and the brightest, and they're all vying for a huge cash prize. This will probably be the most intense thing you've ever gone through in your life. I remember that feeling because I was one of them. I lost.

But now I'm coming back as a judge and also a kind of teen girl anthropologist. Because if you want to understand what it's like to be a young woman in America today, the competition's not a bad place to start. Hopefully no one will die on stage tonight. From Pineapple Street Studios and Wondry, this is the competition. Follow the competition on the Wondry app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to the competition early and ad free right now by joining Wondru Plus. So Marina Del Rey, she was like, I love that Francisco.

She's like belting it out, bellowing it out. So she's packing. It's like, let me call their rocks. I'll be careful. I mean, I called it today. And she's talking about how she's like really excited because there's like a boat that goes under the Golden Gate Gate Bridge which is like really exciting because like a bridge and like a boat and we don't have like boats and bridges here in Los Angeles. Like everyone's like coming together for Kyle Chan's launch party in San Francisco and like Brock and I want to plan some like fun things like it'll be also just like nice to have like some fun time with like Brock and

I feel like we haven't had like a lot of that recently except for that time we went to the restaurant where they served us like a boombox when we asked for some butter so like I don't know like even though all our friends are gonna be there, it's gonna be like, right. But yeah, and Brock wants to do a roaring 20s party and he wants everybody to dress like gangsters and finish the summer with a bang. So that's what we're gonna do. Can we please stop and thank you for not letting them call it the great Gatsby party because you know that's what they were gonna call it. And Vanderpump was like, Oh wait, don't

step on the toes of Vanderpump Villa. Yeah. Cause Vanderpump Villa has a Gatsby party. This is a Gatsby party. And of course the beautiful and wonderful musical has just premiered on Broadway, The Grey Gatsby, which I encourage everyone to go see. The only Gatsby party I'm going to allow in my life. That's the only Gatsby we're allowing is the one that Dom choreographed. Well actually for real, like cause it's one thing when like, ooh, Broadway people put up a beautiful set

and it's all Art Deco. It's another one you see like Brock putting on a bowler cap. It's like, it's like, it's just, let's like leave Gatsby to the professionals at this point. I don't know. I thought he was pretty cute. He looked like he was in fricking, um, clockwork orange. Into it.

So she's like, I've never had rice oroni. It's like, what's raw? So rooney. Like she literally just said it. Okay. All you had to do is repeat Brock. So I've had wallaby. What is it again? I've had wallaby oroni runny. Wait, say it again. I've had wallaby, a runny. Is that the same thing? I've had rice, a runny. And that's when I was, it was time to pay for my children. And I started running towards the airport.

Does that count? The Alice Springs tree. So. Springs treat. So go solo just for a rice or only job. My God. So

ever call you rice or Ronnie growing up? Of course. Did they? Yes, of course. Yeah. I was commercials were on all the time when I was a kid. Uh, so Ariana and now guess who we get? Dan. It's Dan's first main episode.

Everybody welcome. Dan's like, Hey. Yeah. Dan. Hey, I'm Dan. Hey, he's very sarcastic. I was not expecting that. I wasn't either cause he's got such like a goofy smile on him where he's just

like a slack jawed smiler, you know, where he's like, yeah, and then he says something really shitty and I'm like, Whoa, not expecting that Dan was not expecting that Dan. Welcome to the table. Have a seat. Dan. I know I was, I don't know what I was expecting. I was expecting, I think someone more earnest cause he's like a personal trainer, right? He's like a trainer and he also likes his family. And you know,

personal trainers are very, very earnest about everything. Cause they're always posting. Oh yeah. They always are posting things like you gotta be the best today because you know what? Nothing in life is promised. And so you gotta just put in the work. The dues are paid. It's Monday. No Mondays myth the They're always you know, they're acting like just because they're doing their job that that makes them motivational speakers Yeah, you love that you love a good word art salad on top of a picture of a hot guy without a shirt It's like it's like it's like it's like a CPA

filing someone's taxes and being like, no Tuesdays miss. Sometimes you just got to show up. You got to do what you got. It's like, shut up. Yeah, be quiet. Keep your shirt off and no one's here. No one's here for your mental training. OK, we're here for your personal training. I'm not even on your your Instagram for your personal training. I'm just here to reap the rewards of your personal training,

which is pictures of you without your mouth moving. Okay. Stop your flapping, sir. Okay. So I just assumed I assumed that Dan was going to be like whatever you need, you know what, like life is about positivity. We're going to make those gains and it's going to be great. I feel like they're all real housewives, aren't they? They're all like real housewives tag lines. Some people like their cats, but I'm always in the fast lane.

Personal trainer is always trying to have something to say. Just take off your shirt. Yeah, just take off the shirt. Stop trying to have something to say. Just take off your shirt. Yeah, just take off the shirt. Stop trying to. By the way, don't ever click. I don't know if your Facebook serves you this, but I had this Facebook thing serve to me that was this guy with the biggest butt, okay?

And he was like a personal trainer guy, of course. And he was kind of bouncing up and down, flapping his butt. But it wasn't like twerking, it was just showing like how much he works out, I guess. And I made the mistake of clicking it, because, you know, they only show you like a second of the video and I'm like, well, what is his butt doing? You know, I have to see. And now all I'm served on Facebook are really muscular, hot guys, and who I guess it's a thing. That's what they do. They're hot for a living, and then they just kind of vlog or whatever,

where they're like, yeah, guys, today I made spaghetti. And then the comments like, I love you, I make spaghetti for you every day, big boy. And it's just like everybody's mom on Facebook, like hitting on these really hot guys. And I guess that's a living, that's a living thing. Oh, it's all over. It's all over. That's so cool. There's a really hot guy who I start to follow. And what I appreciate about him is that he's hot. And his Instagram is really just about him being hot. He's not like, he's not doing the thing like, yo man, we gotta figure out Ukraine.

You know, he's just like, he's like, I'm hot. I just wanna look hot for you. That's my role in life. I have this two year window. I'm gonna do it. And I'm like, I appreciate that. Two year window? We all And like, I appreciate that. We all know. He's like, I'm almost to the point of not being hot. So yeah,

I appreciate that. There's no bullshit about like, it's Tuesday. Got to start that week. Is there a tea? Oh, I thought tea kettle was going. Oh, I'm sorry. No, I was getting fidgety. My friend sells these fume cigarette things. Well, they're air. It's like flavored air to replace vaping. And so I'm like sucking on this fume thing. It's good. It's like flavored. We love fumes. It's like a little fidget spinner. All right. So Ariana and Dan go on a date and they order some food.

And Ariana is saying this, she's never been in a long distance relationship and she's playing it by ear and the distance forces you to take things slow and get to know each other and you can't just be like fucking, which is funny because it's like, you know, Ariana and Tom were dating for like 10 years. I would say that's also taking it pretty slowly.

I would say that as someone who's dating someone for 10 years. So Ariana is very excited that they're going to be flying on a plane together tomorrow for the first time ever. And and she's like, yeah, everyone's going to be there. And, you know, like, Sandoval won't be at the Friday activities, but like Thursday, everyone's going to be there. Like she's basically like, brace yourself. Sandoval is going to be there.

And he's like, awkward. Oh, yeah. He's like, I'm good. He might say hi to you. He's like, yeah, I'm good with that. I'm good with that. I'm good. And so she's like, it would be great, you know,

if you were living here and he's like, well, you know, look, I mean, I have so many jobs. I'm busy. I work seven days a week, but you know, it does suck not to see you, but work, look, I mean, I have so many jobs. I'm busy. I work seven days a week, but you know, it does suck not to see you, but work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work, work. Well, guess what they have in Los Angeles? Personal trainers, okay?

The city's kind of built on it, so. It's kind of like the main thing. And Ariana's like, oh, you know, I have to say, I was so looking forward to this. He goes, what, the travel? She goes, no, this, us, oh, me. It was a joke. So then she's talking about how it's really funny

because there's so many times where she's going to bed and he's waking up for work on the East Coast and they're like, hi, good night, good morning, da da da. And then, yeah, she just, she, she's like, well, he doesn't wanna move here, but he's like, well, he doesn't want to move here, but he's like, well, maybe we'll go to Europe. Yeah, yeah, I'm bored. I'm bored.

I think this couple could- I'm bored myself. No, I'm not saying you're boring. I'm just bored with this scene. And I think this couple could work out because I'm bored. And I feel like most couples that work out, I spend five minutes with them. Present company excluded, of course. Oh, well, thank you.

But most couples that are good together, yeah, I spend five minutes with them. Present company excluded, of course. Oh, well, thank you. Thank you. But most couples that are good together, yeah, I spent five minutes with them and I'm like, can I get some toxicity in here? Okay, great. Without it, I just want to leave and go to bed and never call you again. So I think you guys are going to be super happy for a while. Congrats. Congrats. Okay. Congrats. Let's go to the Santa Vol show at the El Rey.

Why are you trying to do this to us? I know that you guys are trying to have this whole redemption season. This is not the way to do it, okay? You want the man to not be hurting people's heads. You're gonna give half the audience an aneurysm. No one deserves this. Yeah, it's gonna be a Tom Sandoval

in the most extras at the L Ray. And so we see Tom backstage and he's playing on his trumpet. And so his mom, Terry arrives, because of course her name is Terry. I think like all the moms are named Terry on the show, if I'm not mistaken. And she's like, hey, Tom, how you doing, Tom? Good to see you. And T is there in the green room, does not get to say a word on camera,

but she's still there. James Kennedy shows up. She's like doing an arm dance like on TikTok. I have to say, his mom being there was so funny to me, because first of all, Tom's trying to be a badass with that trumpet, can't play it still, which is hilarious. I love that he keeps bringing it around for credit,

but never learns to play it properly. And then they show Terry, and she's like, honey, honey, so good to see. God, I was just standing out there for every, he's like, come on in, mom. I was like, you just left your mom out by the stage door. No one went to get Terry. Terry's probably been texting Tom for two hours. Like, well, they won't let me in, honey. No one really believes that I'm your mom.

It would be nice if you'd just please come out here, please. The man just pooped on the sidewalk. Well, you know, Terry's probably the type that's like, you know, I don't want to be a bother. you'd just please come out here. Please. On the sidewalk. Well, you know, Terry's probably the type that's like, you know, I don't want to be a bad. I'm just gonna stand here. I'm sure someone will find me. I don't want to be bothering anyone. I text anyone. I'm just at mother's entrance. Mother's entrance. So she was just down the street at Staples by accident. So, um,

she, the concert starts and this was hilarious because you know Tom's just singing that Touchin' Public song and he's just going, he's doing this whole thing and they keep cutting to Terry and the audience and she looks like Joyce DeWitt like at a sale at Marshalls or something. She's just like, and she has this like look on her face. And she's like looking up, this huge smile, like, wow, my first concert, it's my son's. She was, it was so cute to see her so proud, especially cause she just lost half a million dollars. So, it was nice to see her find some joy in something,

because I would not be at my son's concert smiling that big if he had just blown 500 grand, okay? I'd be there with a shotgun. Like I brought you into this world and I can take you out, motherfucker. No pun intended, because I'm your mother in this scenario. I take that back, but not the shotgun, bitch. Significantly, Jo is also in the audience and she's just like bopping her head and she looks so bored. I'm like, wow, you must be a bad band if you're able to sap the joy out of Joe's life.

Like the only medication that can calm Joe is this band. This band is the only anesthesia for Joe. Okay. I know it was the first time we haven't seen her like bouncing off the walls and telling stories about turtles. She's like, how's everyone doing tonight? Yeah. So she's been told to come shoot with Schwartz and she's not ready, but she's going to be suckered in in two seconds because he works on her. You know what I mean? It just works for her. And so he's like, Hey,

want to get some air real quick? You know, we should get we should get single people's air. That's where you breathe your own air. And I breathe my own air. We don't breathe each other's air. And that's our faces are really close together because we're secretly in love. I'm probably gonna have each other's babies and I don't know your baby's gonna be breathing my one day. I'm so glad we're not dating. Oh, it's good to be outside. day. I'm so glad we're not dating. It's good to be outside. What if my single heir meets your single heir and they get married because that heir is both in love? I mean, we're not in love. We're both single. We're doing our own thing, but our heir loves each other. Our heir is in a committed relationship. Am I sending mixed messages because our heir

is in love, but we're not in love? Are you following this? So they go outside in the marquee, they're like, let's look at the marquee, ah, and they're already changing it. You know the LRA could not wait to get Sandoval's name off of their building. They're like, let's get this down. We're gonna put up any one at this point.

We'll put up like, I don't know. The sign guy's like, well, we normally keep these up longer but our stock literally started falling the second these letters went up on the board. So, had to get them off. So, she's trying to keep a serious demeanor with him and he's like, so how's your break been? How many did you bang? She's like, Tom! Oh my God, I'm so sorry, I pushed that pedestrian, I pushed you Tom into a pedestrian. Tom, crossing, Schwartz crossing! Sorry, I'm back. You got me again pedestrian. Tom, crossing, Swartz crossing. Sorry, I'm back.

You got me again. All you had to do was joke about me sexually and I am back in the fold. Oh good, God, it's been so awkward lately. I don't even know how to stand. I'm like, oh wow, ever since that conversation on the sofa where you know, I broke your heart and I saw all the tears in your eyes dancing around

in little circles, your tears were actually doing dirty dancing. the tears in your eyes dancing around in little circles. Your tears were actually doing dirty dancing. They were doing time in my life with each other. It was amazing. Well, ever since then, I'm like, hello, Joe, how are you? It's so awkward. Am I right? I'm a little boy.

So he's like, I'm glad you're coming to San Fran. Wow, nothing is gonna make her feel less led on than inviting her on a trip with your friends. You fucking weirdo. Yeah, we're going to go eat sourdough bread, we're going to ride trolleys, we're going to go to the most romantic vista and take selfies together and be like this is what it would look like if we were actually married and went on a vacation together. Sorry for mixed signals.

Yeah, he's like, no, I don't want to send mixed signals so I'm just going to make it perfectly clear. And she's like, we are just friends. want to send mixed signals, so I'm just going to make it perfectly clear. And she's like, we are just friends. Everybody needs to know we're just friends. Please say it again. Tom Schwartz would like to sing a song with the most extras. It's called Only Friends with Joe. Only Friends with Joe.

Robot, robot, hinges on my elbow, hinges on my elbow. What am I doing with the robot? I can't stop it. I can't stop it I can't have you ever ever dreamt about marrying a robot before sorry for the mixed signal I just really love small wonder Anyway, other people have made it that like, you know, I can't say things and I'm like really except I'm like really excited that you're coming to San Francisco, you know, it's like oh my god You are the most dramatic person ever

Oh, everyone, this's my friend Joe. I'm in love with her. I want to marry her secretly. We're gonna get married in eight years. And she's like, Schwartz gives me whiplash and it's frustrating. I was like, that's how Katie got like that. Look at Joe's energy in this scene,

like when he gets her amped up and she's like, oh my God, you're great, look at us. And then look after five minutes with Schwartz, it cuts to her in the diary room and she's like, he gives me whiplash. Yeah, she turns into like a sad sock puppet. You know when sock puppets are sad, when people make sock puppets sad

and they're like, the fingers go down over the thumb and they're like, oh, that's what she's turned into. Yeah, that's what you say Sheena's face is like. You've always said Sheena has soft puppet face. I mean, I think it may just be an LA thing. It's sort of what happens to people out here. Or a Schwartz thing. I think that's what Schwartz does to you. I mean, look at this poor girl.

She went from that to like, in the diary room, I mean, look what happened. What have you done to Jo? Bring her back, bring her back. So she's like, you know, whatever, this fucking guy. Okay, so then Lala, now everybody's leaving and Lala's telling us, my first impressions of dance, let me put it this way.

You can tell he's a great guy and all, tell me he's a great guy all the lifelong days. But I think it's fucking weird that any dude would be like she's the one just left her man of 10 years and they still live together. I'm sorry something seems off with him. You were with a guy who was literally still with a wife and children and a mistress. Please drop it, Lala. I know. Meanwhile Lala's going on dates being like, hey, so I have a babysit home. I just got out of a relationship with a man

who balances fried chicken on his chest and I'd love to squirt all over his use. So I'm just saying she's one to talk about like, people just have different situations. So they get on a plane and everything and then James is like rapping in a seat. He's like, well not rapping, he's just going, San Fran, you say what? San Fran, San Fran, San Fran.

I'm going to do that at the San Francisco tent in Coachella someday. So, sound of all is like, oh, last thing I want to do is make people feel uncomfortable, especially that like huge smiley boyfriend guy. But I am intrigued. But I'm going to be very low key. Hold on, I'm gonna be, mind my own business over here. Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. Boop.

I'm easy like Sunday morning. Cause I'm easy, ah. Lionel Richie's like, leave my work out of this, please. The windows of the van are all busting in. Sunday morning is now canceled. We just go from Saturday directly to Monday. So everyone shows up at the hotel and this cast, it's like, if you ever wonder whether or not

they actually live in the homes that we see, I'd now question it because the way they jump on beds and get so excited about sofas, it's like they've been living in caves for the past 10 years. They're just all jumping around. Schwartz throws himself on his bed. He's like, oh, it's a bed.

And he throws himself on it. And then he goes, oh, it's not that soft. Oh, oh. So Dan's spending the day alone. He's like gonna get a workout or a massage. Oh. And Ariane is like, yeah, I guess I'm just gonna have a fun day with my ex boyfriend.

So then in short. I wish I could be there to see it. Bye. I'm like, I kind of feel like you should kind of hang out with your girlfriend a little bit. I know. Is that such a wild concept or no, I don't know what the deal is, why, why they're bringing him, but he's not hanging out.

He doesn't want to get dragged into the mess. Clearly. You're dating the mess. I mean, you literally started dating when there were headlines on every grocery store checkout. You can't, you can't, you can't get with the mess and then be like, oh my God, you're dirty. You're dating a stain, okay? You're supposed to be a tide stick. I literally came towards the stain, okay?

You came to Vanderpump rules. I just get where we see this happen on reality shows where like a guy comes in and then is like, I don't want to be with us. Like we saw it with Tinsley and her man, Scott, we saw it with Stassi and Patrick and they come in and they like Dane to shoot a few scenes and then they're like, I don't want this. And then they drag the person away from it, yada, yada, yada. So I'm just like a little, like, I feel like you have to accept your person for who they are. So I don't know.

He seems nice so far. I like him, but I was a little bit like. Yeah. So yeah, I mean, you need to be part of the mess. Like you're coming onto the show, you're the new boyfriend. I need to see you give attitude to Tom. That's why you're here. Okay, drop the fucking massage, sir.

So then Schwartz goes to Sandoval's room and he's like, dude, why are you wearing shorts in San Francisco? He's like, oh, cause I'm from Minnesota. We're just 34, we're wearing shorts and marrying our best friend. Just kidding, Joe, wherever you are. He's like, I'm under the bed,

which is just such a coincidence. I did not hear that. Do not talk to me. We are just friends. Good night. Kyle Chan appears also. I'm under here too. Just one of the guys. Chef Penny appears next to him. It's my bed. And it's like, hi guys. I'm actually

in the covers. So Schwartz asks Sandoval if he's met Dan and Sandoval's like, no, like I should have the low down the way that Ariana did to T. And then we see a flashback of Ariana telling T, don't waste your time with the 41 year old narcissist. Yeah. Well, she could get away with that because you cheated on her publicly and fucked her over, but she did not do to you. So it doesn't really have the same fun sting. Why are we still focused on him? So then we go to Pier 39 and the group comes and Schwartz is like hey Katie take my hand Katie Katie take my hand. I thought you might have a reflex to grab it. She's like

Reflex you never held my hand The only reflex I have is a gag so yeah, I remember when you would say like Tom hand me my keys and I would hand you over the keys and then you would go to take them and then I dropped them on the floor. I thought you'd at least have the reflex. I don't know. Crouched down and like start looking around for jingly things. So Brocks like hey guys, we're going to go on a boat. So if you don't have any warm clothing clothing maybe pick some up at one of these shops over here so they go and they buy thanks dad thanks thanks for telling us that weather works for explaining san francisco to the californians you fucking hot ass gorgeous piece of art and then brock said i honestly didn't expect the chill factor oh i told you

this i said check the weather i said w e aE-A-T-H-E-R. How you like it? And you said literally I like it a little bit cold. So now they're walking around and Schwartz is like, whoa, do you think those guys actually escaped from Alcatraz? Honestly, from this vantage point, I know it's bone chillingly cold.

I feel like I can do it though. I can do it. Wait a second. Are those purple highlights at Alcatraz? Is that a giant pendulum? It's just like Lisa Vanderpump saying, I rule Alcatraz. No one gets out of here. Just like no one escapes, sir. Welcome to Vanderpump Villa. So Schwartz is talking to Sandoval like he can't believe they're still friends. This is like crazy. And guess what?

He's gonna commit to moving in with Tom, guys. Which yikes. What a loser. Congratulations. Can't say I'm surprised. Have fun spending the last of your reality TV money that you're ever gonna make again on this fuckwit and his future foreclosure.

Have fun, have fun! So now we see some sea lions and then everyone gets on a boat called wine therapy and they put up these very, very sad plates of food, like some sad grocery store cookies from like Safeway and like a few like pieces like pineapple. And then James like San Francisco baby. And he starts like twirling on the stripper pole and he is like, he got coked up somewhere in that tourist trap.

Like I don't know what he found in his hoodie, but he is geeked up and out of control right now. Okay, so I have to say, this is ranking up there with one of the top exciting vacations of all time on Vanderpump rules. They go on a weird boat trip where it's cloudy and freezing and the weather's terrible and so it's really wavy and they're all about to get thrown off and just make small talk about stuff. So they're doing that and Sandoval is reminiscing about how they, he came to

San Francisco on one of their first trips together and went to the Palace of Fine Arts. And Lala's like, that's so sad. Cause what you do now is like so far from fine or art. And you definitely don't live in a palace. What a journey, what a journeys. So there's big swells coming in and James is trying to take a selfie, but he gets knocked over by a wave, which was great.

And like the tiny boat is getting thrashed around in the water and Arianna is losing her mind because she's like afraid of waves. And then it settles down and then Brock is like honking the horn because he's like driving the boat and Katie's like, that's like so loud. That horn is like so loud. Boys are so weird. They're like, I want to drive the boat. What about that? It's fun, Katie. What about it? It's fun. She goes, like learn how to fuck a woman before you drive a boat. Yeah.

Katie is Katie is just always so fun, but she's kind of right actually on this case. So James is talking to Ally and he's like, Ally, do you want to drive, Ally? You want to drive the boat? You want to drive the boat? Come on, Ally, drive the boat. Ally, you can do it.

So nothing's happening basically yeah um so they see some some cuddle puddles my spirit animal to see the sea lions and then uh ariana sees sanderville saying hi to them she's like i hope he gets attacked that would be sick and then back at the dock i mean i don't know guys that would okay so Okay. So rock and Ariana have a conversation where he's like, Oh, Have you decided to be a stopping an angry woman and forgive sand of all yet? Basically conversation Yeah, and she's like well, like what she's saying like things are better because he learned not to talk to me and But don't you see like like you see it being better in the foreseeable future

She's like better for who? For whose benefits? Well, I think for my wife's benefit. She goes, well, the woman I care about more than anything, who he screamed at less than a week ago, sorry, I care more about her than other people in her life that are gonna scream at her like that. And he's like, forgiveness isn't accepting what he's done. It's giving yourself the ability.

Shut up. You know who knows who's always preaching about forgiveness? People who fuck other people over. Okay? How about you maybe like make amends in your life before you start lecturing everybody else about forgiveness, sir. Okay? You've got plenty to go do without bugging some lady about forgiving some douchebag who you don't even like anyway. Ariana's like, you know, the notion that you have to be, you have to like forgive in order to move on in your life. That's like outdated therapy. You're like gray rocking and going no contact. It's literally the only way to avoid shit. The manipulation, all of it. It's me. I'm the gray rock. What does the gray rock mean, Ronnie?

I don't know. Gray rocking. I don't know, but I was like, Jesus just got served. I'll tell you that much. Jesus is like, okay, sorry, I take it all back. Rewrite the second chapter, am I right? Get a load of that one. Yeah, well, while you look at Farvel's, forgive me for buying orchestra seats to Chicago. Beesnatch. Am I right, everybody? Jesus is like, I made Chicago happen for you,

so thanks, but no thanks. Gray rocking. The gray rock method is a tactic people may use to deal with abusive or manipulative behavior. It involves becoming as uninteresting and unengaged as possible so that the other person loses interest. Oh, so it's like me doing porn.

It's like me in a sex scene. Is it over? Katie's really been doing that for a while now, huh? I know. So my Katie karaoke, you guys are so mean to Katie. Um, so Ariana's like, you know what? There's power to me, like in hurt and anger and female emotion and being able to have that and not being put in this position of you have to take the high road or be stoic or strong in every moment in order to have power.

I think there's power in all these emotions and I stand behind that and I totally agree by the way. And you know, I've said that for a long time. Forgiveness is overrated and rage is motivating. I've always said it. And you know that I live like that. I mean, you hear me raging out here all the time. I don't believe in this bullshit where we just pretend everything's okay. I say, let it flow and let it go, you know? Or don't let it go. Stew on it. You know, sometimes that's better. Stew is a delicious meal. It's still served by every mother on the planet. Okay? Stew is good. So sometimes it's better. Just let it go. You don't know anybody, your bullshit and polite feelings. You know, fuck them. If they were polite, they wouldn't have made you

feel that way in the first place. So I say, you see a brick, take it to a windshield of the person who wronged you and use it. Fuck them. Okay? And if forgiveness is that important, then surely someone will forgive you. So Ariana's like, you know, there never seems to be any issue with male rage, but female rage, we just love to have a problem with that. I mean, I see, and he's like, well, give me an example of male rage, which is hilarious. And he's just like, um, I see male men raising their voices all the time and the screen just cuts into four quadrants. we see Sandoval, Schwartz, Brock and James screaming at different people from different seasons.

Cause that's what I mean. Just last week, uh, Brock was screaming at his wife at a party and Sandoval was screaming at Sheena at a party, or his wife as well. They were both screaming at his wife at a party. So it's funny that he doesn't remember that when he's trying to get her to bring up, he's bringing up forgiveness based on the last party. It's like, hello? Yeah. So, he doesn't get it at all. He's like, well, forgive me for trying to talk sins to a woman,

am I right? So then it's nighttime and they're getting ready and Sheena FaceTime's Brock and he's like, I'm at the barber down at the barber. I'm at the barber down the street getting a fresh cut. Yeah, I want to be the gangster who supplies all the gangsters. They call me back in the day, the pocket watch. Cause guess what? I specifically supply pocket watches. I have a very, I'm a gangster with a very, very narrow definition. I'm just the guy that's like keeps everyone on time, but I'm still a gangster. So then Lala comes to Ariana's room and dancing a towel and she, and he's got really long hair.

Now that it's all down and he looks really hot and she's like, Oh my God, Daniel, why do I feel Daniel's growing inside of me already? Is there something? Do you mind if I just leave this little plastic cup on your nightstand in case you have the urge to fill it later? Just let me know. I'm soft and now I'm wet.

So, she's, Ariana's like, oh my God, Dan got me a Celsius and put it in an ice pocket. And while I was gone, he ironed all my clothes. I was like, you know what? I take back everything. Keep this man. No, that's why she likes him. When she was talking the first time and she's like,

yeah, it's really nice. He does stuff for me. And he's like, so he's like a personal assistant that you can bang. I mean, it sounds good. I don't know that it speaks to like the longest term, but Hey, I think for a, I think for a follow-up relationship, it sounds pretty good. I mean, he runs errands and if he's ironing,

if he's ironing and then putting like little sodas and on ice for you, that's a keeper. So she's like a housekeeper. It still works. The best kind. Yeah. So basically Dan's skipping out on dinner because he's going to go have dinner with Brad, who's one of Ariana's gays, and he's clearly avoiding the whole situation. Meanwhile, over in James and Ali's room, James pops up from a bubble bath like a little boy and he's like, Ha ha ha, hello, bubbles! And she's like, I am literally crying. Like, that was so funny with like the bubble bath.

Like, this is like the most intense bubble bath I've ever seen. It's like this bubble bath is in like Gemini's house of the seventh moon and that house has a bath in it with bubbles in it. Like, oh my God, I would get like a yeast infection if I went in there. And he's like, oh, so you're not going to come to the bathtub with me? That's a shame. I'm just a fun little boy having fun in the bath. Choo choo.

I'm not buying this James thing. I don't know what it is. I prefer James when he's just crazy and not manically faking that he's okay. Yeah, I was also really upset that they still didn't show footage of a Southwest flight overhead. There were planes in San Francisco, like for all that footage. Truly, I know all the bubbles start separating. It's like. So we go back to Lala and she goes,

can I tell you something? It's so weird seeing you with someone who isn't Sandoval, like Dan, was that weird? On like being with us or anything like that? You know, you wanna say something right now? She was like, so what would you do if the ex comes up to you? What are you gonna do?

And he's like, he hasn't done anything to me, but at the same time, I know what he's done. Yeah, well, it's fine. You've got a good body, like good for you. Workouts. I'm talking about the real shit. Lala can't concentrate. She's just like, uh, it's fine. You've got a good body, like good for use. You work out. I'm like, well, I can't concentrate. She's just like, uh-huh.

Nice body. Okay, I gotta go. And his hair is just like wet and long and just like, it's very sexy. So now the group is arriving. Now they're in their Gatsby. It's like, this party is like Gatsby, but also gangster, which one could say is Gatsby, but it's like, I think it's like, are we doing an Al Capone party or are we doing a Gatsby but also Gangster, which one could say is Gatsby, but I think it's like, are we doing an Al Capone party

or are we doing a Gatsby party? I don't know, everyone's sort of dressed very half-assed. We're doing the depression. I think this is like the depression. I think it is like Rifts of Wrath. Yeah, I think we're just hitting depression at this point. So, Sound of All comes in, everyone's in their wacky costumes,

and they're teasing each other about their costumes, and Sound of All comes in, and everybody in their wacky costumes and they're teasing each other about their costumes and Sand of all comes in and everybody's being nice to him and stuff. And so Arianna, James is like, oh my God, you and Arianna wearing the same shoes, chum, oh is that on purpose? And she goes, no, I'm under Steve Madden. Katie, let's go over here and look at a boat.

She's like, okay. Everyone points out by the way, that James is dressed like a newsie. He's like, he has this little cap on, his little vest, it's hawking newspapers. I think Lala goes, James is like a 12 year old hawking papers near the Titanic. So Katie and Ariana go and look at the Bay Bridge

and then Schwartz suddenly rolls up on them and he's like, oh, this is a vibe for you two. You guys look like a duo. Sorry, if I look a little bit like I'm in pain, it's because I bounced off the bed and it really hurt me. Oh. So Katie comes, Schwartz and Katie are talking and she's like, yeah, we're supposed to be a duo.

We're the new Tom Tom. And he goes, look at us, Katie, we're friends again. She goes, um, yeah. And Ariana's like, oh, we're all friends, are we? He goes, yeah, it's so nice hanging out with Ariana and just not feel like, oh God, I don't know, I'm gonna be in trouble. I'm not in trouble, am I?

Am I in trouble? She's like, yeah, well, I really enjoy it when you act like that. And he's like, no, I'm still sub-Sovereign. I really am. Okay, the order goes you, oh no, yeah, well, I really enjoy it when you act like that. And he's like, no, I'm still suburbian. I really am. Okay. The order goes you. Oh no, Katie, then you, then the bad, then me. That's all good. So he's saying how he just like really likes that he doesn't have to tiptoe anymore. I'm like, you always tiptoe. I hate to break it to you. That was always your vibe. And he just likes that there's not as much tension anymore.

So Schwartz is now just with Katie and he's like, oh Katie, so you like me again? She's like, no, I don't. No, we're friends. Pfft. I have a good idea. Katie, Katie, hey Katie, Katie. She's like, what?

I'm looking right at you. But Katie, Katie, Katie, Katie, Katie, hold on, hold on. Remember when you used to like, when I did this? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Tom! Okay, you wanna fuck tonight?? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Tom! Okay, you wanna fuck tonight? We should have one night stand. You know what tonight we should do?

I should come to your room and we should just doom scroll. We'll just scroll through bad news and we'll just like not say anything to each other and then I'll say Katie and then you could kind of look at my general, my general direction and go Hrrrrrrrrrrrr be so romantic. I can maybe jerk off silently in the bathroom. She's like, gross, Tom, but she's totally turned on. Like, these two, these two are back, guys. They're back. Yeah, so Schwartz is like, well, she's like, that's actually a little bit too intimate,

what you just proposed. And she's like, yeah, well, it probably would be better if we fucked. No, no, no, that's not true. That's not true. That didn't come out right. I meant it would be better if we fucked. No, no, sorry. OK, I'm just going to stop talking. I think I'm getting sentimental. Oh, man, I just I just missed the best parts of us. I mean, theoretically, we never really had best parts.

But if we did, oh, I got I wish we had. I wish Gordon and Butters were here, they'd make it better. They are here, I've got a tattoo. Look at my shoulder, talk to my shoulder. It's a safe space. Mm-hmm. So then Sandoval pulls Sheena to look at the view, bro, and they talk really deeply.

He's like, oh yeah, let's talk about PA systems. Forgot what I was supposed to order, not gonna order anything, don't know where to plug things in. So that was pretty much my job. Thanks for being my friend. She's like, yeah, cause like really? We're like friends. He's like, yeah, we're like totally friends.

Yeah, we're like friends. I'm never gonna forget how good you are to me, okay? Yeah, cause we're friends. Okay everybody, we're not friends. Do not accuse us of being friends, okay? Okay, see you later, friend. Ah! Yeah, so like, by the way, I know that Dan's here and I'm sure it's

like a little awkward and like, but don't worry, I'm like, not going to be around. Really? How do you feel about that? Do you almost feel like, Oh, yes, how you like that? So he's like, honestly, when I found out that he's here, I was like, that's really good. Because like, I was always worried about her mentally once my PR team said I should be worried about her mentally. So I'm really glad that she's with someone who could be with her.

Oh God. And she's like, yeah, well, I know that she has a very strong no contact policy, but she's also got a very strong no leftovers policy and he just got her leftovers over. She just got a text about it Yeah, and like you know Here's the thing is that like I also know things that you've said about her and her mental health and the things that she did Want public and is that like something you could actually apologize for for actually weaponizing? No, but like remember when you Jojo Siwa had to carry me, what about that? No, but like, remember when you said

that Ariana threatened to kill herself? Do you remember that? Like, is that something that maybe you could apologize for? And he's like, um. Which is so funny because then he came back the next season and stole that for himself to try and get, to try and garner sympathy from people. Right.

Fucking guy. Yeah, that're right. This fucking guy, huh? So Sheena's just saying that she's just trying to make Sandoval realize that exposing private details about mental health is really bad. And that if he just apologizes, maybe

there could be a path forward. No, Sheena. No. This is not about that, Sheena, OK? It's like, you know what? That would solve it. If you just apologize for that one part where you said that she was going to kill herself, you guys could totally be friends.

Like, I know, Sheena, that's not how it works. Please let's everybody just stop trying to make this happen. It's annoying. It's not going to happen. Just leave it alone. So Sandoval's like, yeah, well, trying to explain where I was mentally and emotionally has come across as me blaming Ariana for things that were Ariana's fault, you know?

And no matter, no matter what I said then, I know that I screwed up. Every being was such a vicious, vicious witch of a person. And no matter how our relationship with South, she didn't deserve that. God, I hope Rachel calls me. I really miss her. All right, are we done here? I'm off the clock.

Good job. It feels really good to be able to talk like this as friends, which we definitely are like, oh wait, you said that, Sandoval. Yeah, it feels really good to talk like this. Yeah, it's been like a long time. I just hope that no one accuses us of being friends. Anyway, it's great to be friends again. Oh, they hug and that was very heartwarming. I thought this show was going to be over with

episode 14. Why is this still going? And they didn't even say next week on the season finale. That means we have two more. Come on. Yeah, I mean, they're all the seasons lately have been about 16 episodes before the reunion. And you know, they're going to try to milk Vanderpump rules cause it's, you know, doing so well. So I think it's going to be, uh, I looked up when the season finale is and, um, Google said most likely it's going to be in June, but I don't believe that the way

they're talking with this, they're like, we're going to blow out the big pole. We're going to blow out the someone in San Francisco makes it feel like the season finale is going to happen up here in San Francisco. I'm sure next week, there's at, there's going to be some party and then Lisa's going to show up. She's like, well, you didn't think you could have a party with the help to me, of course. And she'll bring hippie and James is going to cry. Uh, that's my prediction. Well, we'll find out everybody.

Thank you so much for being with us here for Vanderpoop drools. We sure love you. Go check out Vanderpoop Villa on our Patreon bonus episodes. And yeah, congrats to my neighbors for this fume thing. They're really into it. I guess these things are taking off and people are really into them. Go check them out. Go buy some. Okay. And say, we love you fume guys. Ronnie sent us, if they ask you. And I think that's it. Do you have anything else to say? Oh yeah, go buy tickets for our shows,

Netflix Comedy Festival this weekend in LA, and then London, Dublin, and Birmingham at the end of May. Welcome to May, everybody, by the way. Welcome to May, guys. It's wild. Bye, everyone. Crazy. Love everyone. Crazy. Love ya.

Watch what crappins would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. Strolling the park with Caitlin Clark. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniela. Hitchels. Erin McNicholas, she don't miss no trickles.

She's never scary, it's the green fairy. Jamie, she has no last name-us. She's never scary. It's the green fairy Jamie. She has no less name-y Hava Nagila Webber Know your worth with Jason Kurt. She's the wind beneath our Jennifer wing Sip some scotch with Jessica Tratch. She's always supplying. It's Kelly Ryan. Kristin the piston Anderson Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino. We wanna hang with Liz Lang. Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the Berg.

The Bay Area Betches. Betches. And our super premium sponsors. Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy M.D. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Kaitlyn O'Neal. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily sides. We for Ava love Ava.

Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. We got our wish, it's Jen Plish. She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch. She's a little bit loony. Junie, my favorite Murdo, Karen McMurdo. We love him madly, it's Kyle Pod Shadley. Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender, the incredible, edible Matthews Sisters. Give him hell, Miss Noelle.

She's the queen bee, it's Sarah Lemke. Shannon, out of a cannon, Anthony. Let's take off with Tamla Plain. She ain't no shrinkin' Violet Coutar. We love you guys!