Watch What Crappens - #2511 RHOC S18E05 Part One: Amiga to None

Episode Date: August 9, 2024

This is part one!Vicki shows up on The Real Housewives of Orange County to uplift fellow Christian women. Instead, Tamra stays pressed about Shannon’s drinking and “Lexi” continues to obsess over Storms while instigating yet another lawsuit against her obsession. Watch your bunnies, people. Jesus Jugs is unhinged. Watch this recap as a video and get our Love Island bonus episodes at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Watch Your Crappins ad free right now. Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Watch What Crappens? Oh, I love you, little future. Guess what happens when there's so much that crappens. Well, hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens. Watch What Crappens is a podcast for all of that crap we'd love to talk about. On your bras! I'm Ronnie and that's Ben over there. Hi, Ben. Hi, Ronnie. how's it going? Welcome to heaven, you little angel.

Oh yeah, I feel it. I feel the heaven. What's new with you? Well, my niece and my sister are in town, so I'm going to see a bunch of Harry Styles sites. So I'm very Harry-fied. I like love Harry. And last night I went to see Ruel,

who's a 21 year old, very talented young person singing. And I stood with the moms in the back of the bar and I cheered them on and said, you go youth, you're doing great youth. And I was very impressed with the youth of America. I feel like they're doing great. Like there was no throwing up, there was no drug use.

I mean, I'm sorry that you guys lead such a boring life. You could have learned some lessons from our people, but they were, what a good, clean group of people. Let me just say, Youth of America, whatever craziness is going on in this country, I think we've got a very promising youthful group to take over, so you guys go for it. Please don't cut my social security

until I'm done with it, thanks. What Ben? Well that's very cool. I have to give a shout out to one of our listeners. His name is Steven. I was flying back from New York earlier this week and I was scanning my boarding pass from my, well, first I was trying to be fancy.

I did it from my watch, which normally works fine, but it didn't work. And so then the gate agent was like, so then I was like, I know it's boardifying. And then I was trying to be fancy with your watch and then it just denies you. And then you're stuck there. I know, cause I know you tried it five times

trying to get it through. And I'm just, you know, I did the watch only twice. I did it twice and I was like, because the thing is this, if the watch, when the watch works, it's the fastest way of all. You're just like, you know, but when it doesn't work, then everyone is like, oh, look at you. Fucker trying to be clever as if no one else has Apple watches, you know, everyone can do the same thing. Well, it's not acceptable yet because everyone's not using it yet. When it gets to the point where we're all doing it,

then you won't look like an asshole. But we're just not at that point yet. It's like when people would walk around with those little Bluetooth speakers on their ears and they would look like fucking assholes and people would always make fun of them. But now everybody does it, so it's okay. Or like Google glasses, you know?

So then I just went over to my phone. I was like, hold on. So I brought the boarding pass to my phone very quickly and it still wasn't scanning. And then the guy was like, please put it at the top brightness. And I was like, Oh my God. And so I was like scanning. It still wasn't taking. And then I hear a voice behind me saying, you're holding up the whole line, Ben. And I was like, Ooh, I was like, Oh my God, I am holding up the whole line. And then I was like, wait,

how do they know my name? Who are they looking at my boarding pass? And I turned and it was like the sweetest man. He was like, I'm holding up the whole line. And then I was like, wait, how do they know my name? Are they looking at my boarding pass? And I turned and it was like the sweetest man. He was like, I'm just kidding. I'm a big fan. So actually, I don't know if he said big fan, but he said like, I'm a big listener of crap ins. So he was so sweet. He was like, I know who you are.

He was just like trolling me. He was like, I got recognized. Meanwhile, this guy's on Reddit. Like I saw that motherfucker bin with his stupid watch. But anyway, it was funny because he totally trolled me in the best way and he was very sweet. So shout out to Stephen. Also shout out to the Mention It All podcast. I'm on the latest episode with Dylan and that's on the Betches Network. So go check that out. We talk New Jersey and also lots of Real Housewives stuff.

We love Dylan. He's so funny. He knows his housewives inside and out. So that's a good listen. Go check out, mention it all. Mention it all. Okay, well here we are with Real Housewives of Orange Cooties.

Wow, this show is back to its bullying, terrible, terrible roots. These people are terrible. Tamara, you're a vile, vile lady. And Alexis, Alexis, you're such a sad flop of a woman. I'm feeling so sorry for Alexis at this point. This woman has been stalking and she's been putting in her work.

She's been sleeping with Johnny J. I mean, that is disgusting. All to get back on this show just to flop. Oh man, you poor thing. That's a lot of effort to just fail. Yeah, I mean, I don't know if she's really flopping, to be honest. I think she's like hilarious as this,

like this other woman who has come in and she's trying so hard. She is trying so hard, but like, I'm not gonna lie. Her scenes are very amusing to me. It's not really because of her, it's more because of Shannon's reactions to her, you know? But I don't know, I think this is the most entertaining Alexis Oblino has been in a very long time.

Well, that's a very low bar, but you know, boys are hard. That's true, I really was rooting for her. But wow, that's a cringe. It's a terrible. And Tamara just falling back into her old bullying ways. Like girl, you were peeing in a bush last week, weren't you? Or at least getting peed on in a bush and like dancing on a bar and spraying

the spray gun everywhere. And now this week you're coming back to call everybody an alcoholic? I mean... Oh, no. Yeah. But now that said, those two are huge failures, but I'm still cracking up. And I love that despite all of this going on, the ladies are like, oh yeah, Tamara's a terrible bully. And you know, Shannon probably is an alcoholic, but doesn't she look good? Whoa! She's just so thin. But doesn't she look good? Whoa! She's just so thin.

Totally. So we open up at the Balboa Bay Club where Heather and Terry are pretending to live temporarily so that way they can still have some link to this show. So there's like room services coming in, setting up their breakfast and also some sort of tea party. And services coming in, setting up their breakfast and also some sort of tea party. And it's apparently Valentine's Day. So Heather, they're in the midst of a beautiful Valentine's Day morning. Yeah. And Terry, as if he doesn't know Heather, he's like, so what'd you order for breakfast? Did you just get bacon? Yes, Terry. I'm going for my goal weight in a bathing suit.

All right, let's get some bacon. Hitting up a tanning bed later. Here's hoping. So Heather's like, they're talking about the preserved flowers at the buffet. And Heather's like, they're preserved flowers. And he's like, they're gonna last forever, just like our love.

Yes, oh, I love it. Gina and Jen are coming over, so I thought I'd get cheap flowers that way they'd feel more comfortable. I'm gonna have high tea for them. So I got a little tipsy. By the way, I, Heather Dubrow, got a little tipsy last night because I am someone who likes to engage in fun activities and be relatable to poor people in America. Ha. in fun activities and be relatable to poor people in America. Ha! You know me sitting around with the girlfriends around a coldy sack with a 40 in my hands.

40 is not a gun, Terry. It's a 40 ounces of sparkling. It's a sparkling or still? I keep my beers cold by using a cozy beer. I think that's a beer cozy, beer koozie. Oh, yes, of course. I'm so natural with these things. Well, let me tell you, while I was out getting ready

to hit up the bowling alley with my girlfriends, we were talking about this Katie person who started accusing that I call the paparazzi and she has proof. Um, anyway. Wait, wait, wait. So we're back at the paparazzi nonsense. I mean, like, listen, I'd like it when the paparazzi take photos of me. I I like that. And so if there's a number that Katie knows to call the paparazzi who will take pictures of me, I want this number. I also want that number

because I want to call human resources. Is this what we're stooping to, chasing around Terry Dubrow for paparazzi pictures? Come on, there's millions of people you could be getting pictures of. I don't need to see Terry and Heather cuddling at Disneyland. Aren't they important? I know.

What's Harry Styles doing? You know what I mean? What's Ruel doing? There is a part of me that feels like Terry has, I feel like Terry is truth telling here a little bit. Like, he does love paparazzi and I don't think that he would shy away from saying, yeah, I invited them. So, but then again, Heather would shy away from it.

So maybe he's just covering for her. But there's something to what he's saying in my mind. Well, yeah. I mean, of course they love, he's the star of an E show. And she's like putting herself through this to be on Real Housewives of Orange County with her ultimate goal of being on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, with her ultimate goal of meeting Jamie Lee Curtis to be on something real.

So, you know, they're playing a long game, these two. But yeah, of course they call the paparazzi and guess what? So does literally everybody else on this show. So, and every show that you've ever watched and maybe yes, who knows? So it hasn't worked yet. I'm not saying it all. You can call whoever you want to. It doesn't necessarily work. Police you're just like hoping they'll show up. You know what I mean? Yeah, no paparazzi is showing up for me anytime soon. Like I walk onto I get I step onto a red carpet so

rarely. And when I do everyone's like, Okay, guys, I think we can back up for the night. I'm like, Hey, hey, everyone. I walk onto, I step onto a red carpet so rarely and when I do, everyone's like, okay guys, I think we can back up for the night. I'm like, hey, hey everyone. I'm like, hey, TMZ, there's this weird bald guy standing outside of Craig's waiting to murder Harry Styles. I just like wait there smiling. Guys, I'm just gonna say Harry Styles and rule a lot because I'm really aiming for the youth market today, okay?

Oh, by the way, we're talking a lot about bullying today. Can we all stop bullying Joshua Bassett? He really didn't do anything wrong in his relationship with Olivia Rodrigo. And you know, sometimes it's not great to take sides to the point where you're traumatizing a poor child into wasting three years of his life and not making any music, okay?

So let's just all take a step back. All right, Ben, go back to the old people. Go back to talking about the oldies, Ben. And we obviously know Joshua Bassett as one of Chris Bassett's sons, so, you know, it all comes together. No wonder he's traumatized. He's like, I just want to be able to purchase school lunch.

He won't deposit the money in our account. I have no idea who Josh Bassett is. Well, you know. Is he related to Angela? In this group. Okay, so then Katie's house, she's prepping a charcuterie board because you know, she's a housewife now

and that's what real housewives do, you make charcuterie boards. And you know, her ultimate cracker of a husband walks in. Like this is the whitest guy currently on TV, Matt. He's like, hi, I represent golf. Do you wanna talk about charcuterie real quick for our little husband and Y scene before I go off to, I don't know,

put myself in a paling bed. And he's like, so Shannon seems to be the special guest. She goes, yeah, I actually got Shannon a Valentine's Day gift. It's my favorite holiday. So I've got to show people that I love Valentine's Day. I'm sorry, I know I'm being very excitable right now. It's just my favorite holiday. I'm sorry, I know I'm being very excitable right now. It's just my favorite holiday. And he's like, oh, she goes, you know, I have to show my Valentine. And he goes, does that mean me?

And she's like, yeah, we have plans tonight, which you may or may not show up for, am I right? He's like, yeah. Yeah. I just completely ditched you on that one. She's like, God, that's so sexy, so sexy. Sorry for raising my voice. I just get so turned on by Valentine's Day.

It's okay, honey. So then Shanna's like, well, I'm going to see Katie. Well, I really like Katie. You know, sometimes you meet people and they're new on your television show and you don't like them because they're new. Who are you?

Who are you to come on my show? But this time, the thing that makes Katie different is that this season, everybody hates me and nobody will speak to me. So enter Sally. It's actually Katie. Right, right, right. Katie Sally. Sally Katie.

So Katie, so Kata. So Kata. What's your name again? So Shannon likes Katie because Katie doesn't like Heather. So that's a pretty clear path right there. And Katie tells us, you know, I've heard that Shannon is a little bit of a Debbie Downer, but she seems like an incredibly fun person. And I actually really enjoy Shannon and I enjoy Debbie Downers.

It's the next best thing to golf voice is the Debbie Downer voice. So we really get along. So they start talking about the golf event and Shannon's like, oh, it was just so nice not to have Alexis there. So thank you for that. That was, whoa, what a vacation. That was fun. I'm glad you got to see a little fun Shannon. How about hole and lose? I'm very happy. Really, really really very, very happy. Well, you know, forced puns aside, you're dealing with enough. I want you to just be there and have a good time and listen, I know you and Tamara still have a thing, but you guys were good yesterday and you guys, and you know, you guys didn't get into a fight

and Shannon's like, what? I mean, after what you and Heather are going through, I just didn't want to get into it with Tamara, but you know, I was also, you know, I did, was on my third vodka tonic. So I was a little drunk. You know, I couldn't tell the difference between Tamara and a water trap. I love golf. I love golf so much.

So then we flash back to Gina talking to Shannon and Heather at the nail salon, talking about Tamra not being crazy about everybody making up with Shannon so fast. And Shannon's like, Oh, well, she doesn't even know what's going on with me because she hasn't checked in on me. Oh, which is Shannon's theme for the day is like, but how come nobody I'm walking out of this room. Why has nobody followed me out of this room? Is anybody going to follow me out of this room?

Yeah, pretty much. So then Tamara goes and meets up with Emily and she's like, Hey, happy Valentine's day, bitch. So today's your anniversary, right? Cause you're cliches. You guys got married on Valentine's day. That's so sad. And Emily's like, yeah, it's been 15 years. And I have that photo to give him because I did that photo shoot. Remember I did a photo shoot? Let's flashback to my boudoir photo shoot. No, no, no, no, not the one from two years ago.

No, no, not the one from three years ago. No, no, not the one from five years ago. No, the one from this season. Yeah, let's do that flashback. Yeah, it's gonna be really great. I'm gonna up my game tonight at dinner and give his dad a lap dance. It's gonna be great. So, um, Tam was like, how did you like that? And was like, yeah, I was actually pretty good. You know, I want some sunglasses and we see her, uh,

winning the sunglasses and Heather saying, Oh, don't forget to take the tag off. Okay. Don't want people to think you're in a higher tax bracket than you are. They're not really my style though. I just, I think I'm going to give them to Jen because she's poor. Oh, cameras like, yeah, give it to Jen. She might need them. Yeah. She could wear them to Vegas when she travels to Vegas. Tamara says, yeah, you know what? She was just in Vegas. I know, Tamara, that's what I'm making fun of.

Ah! That's the funny. That's the funny. How do I have how much more do I have to smell this out? When I make a Vegas joke, it's in direct reference to the fact that she was in Vegas and doesn't have the money to afford a Tamra. God.

What was she supposed to do? Stay at home and look at the empty bank account? That's a good one. That was a good one. Emily's like, yeah, here's my thing. I really have a hard time with women who just want other people to pay their way. Didn't you just go on and watch what happens

and brag about your in-laws paying for everything in your life? You don't work. Who the fuck is paying for your tacky ass clothes put together with plastic wood chain link ma'am Your grandparents are I mean your your in-laws are you fucking a hypocrite? It's like a walk of two hypocrites Okay, now go call somebody drunk So Tamara tells us yeah, me and Emily are like, we're like little scrappy bitch.

Like we can take care of ourselves bitch. Like Jen is not that personality. And it's like frustrating to see because she's like going through all this shit. But it's kind of like Shannon, it's like self-induced. Well, I mean, I don't know. I just think that Tamra is just so nasty this season. She's just hitting people when they are down. Jen has no money. Shannon is confronting that she might have alcoholism.

Tamra's just kicking him on there, just really at this moment of introspection. That's Tamra. She's like, Oh, you know, he didn't say how everything got to this soon and I couldn't believe it. I mean she was hiding behind the bowl. And then we see Shannon kind of hiding behind, um, one of those heaters, those outdoor heaters like, well, I am behind the heater and no one has come behind the heater to check on me. So I'll just stand here and let my hair get heated. Everyone ignores me.

I love Shannon. I mean, I love Tamara acting like, oh my God, I can't believe Tamara was hiding. I mean, Shannon was hiding for everybody when I've just been like yelling at her and bullying her every single time. She's come in front of me. It's so weird why people are hiding.

It's like Jason being hurt that people are hiding. Like, why are people hiding from me? Is it the mask? Why does Jason talk like Emily? So confession, I did go to Camp Crystal Lake. The mask was just gigantic life raft lips. Jason just wants to show people his boudoir photos. He's like, guys, look at this.

I was like, no. I put an extra hole in my hockey mask. No one. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappins commercial. I'm Dan Tbersky. In 2011, something strange began to happen at the high school in Leroy, New York. I was like at my locker and she came up to me and she was like stuttering super bad.

I'm like, stop f***ing around. She's like, I can't. A mystery illness, bizarre symptoms, and spreading fast. Like doubling and tripling and it's all these girls. With a diagnosis the state tried to keep on the down low. Everybody thought I was holding something back. Well, you were holding something back intentionally. Yeah, yeah, well, yeah.

No, it's hysteria. It's all in your head. It's not physical. You're, oh my gosh, you're exaggerating. Is this the largest mass hysteria since the witches of Salem? Or is it something else entirely? Something's wrong here. Something's not right. Leroy was the new dateline and everyone was trying to solve the murder. A new limited series from Wondery and Pineapple Street Studios. Hysterical.

Follow Hysterical on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Hysterical early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery+. Welcome to The Offensive Line. You guys, on this podcast,'re going to make some picks, talk some sh**, and hopefully make you some money in the process. I'm your host, Annie Agar. So here's how this show's going to work, okay? We're going to run through the weekly

slate of NFL and college football matchups, breaking them down into very serious categories like no offense. No offense, Travis Kelce, but you got to step up your game if Pat Mahomes is saying the Chiefs need to have more fun this year. We're also handing out a series of awards and making picks for the top storylines surrounding the world of football. Awards like the He May Have a Point Award

for the wide receiver that's most justifiably bitter. Is it Brandon Iyuk, T. Higgins, or Devonte Adams? Plus, on Thursdays, we're doing an exclusive bonus episode on Wondery+, where I share my fantasy football picks ahead of Thursday Night Football So Emily's like, why was Shannon hiding? And Tarev's like, I don't know, I have no idea. Like we made some small talk, okay, but like you'd be very proud of me. Again, it's back to your point.

God, I don't know why Shannon's hiding. Maybe it's because every time you see her, you're absolutely vicious to her. Like, and you know that you're vicious to her because you just said, oh, I made some small talk with her. You'd be proud of me. Acknowled acknowledging that normally you don't make small talk. You're either ice cold or yelling at her. Yeah, both of us were looking at each other like, what the hell is going on?

And what's this girl, Katie, doing? And what, you know, all of those things. But we couldn't even talk behind somebody's back because they turned against her. It's like, it's just so hard when you're not really friends to anybody. It's like, who am I supposed to talk about hating somebody with if I'm not friends with somebody at the time? Yeah, you need to organize that a little bit better. Weirdo.

Fucking turning against everybody at the same time. If you're against everybody, you have nobody to talk shit with. Okay, you got to have at least one shit talking friend left in your circle Tamra. Okay, you can't just kick everybody out. No, it's just Emily. So Emily's like, Lola? Yeah, but look how entertaining it is. Emily's just bad at this.

Everybody knows it. Tamra knows it. Tamra doesn't like Emily. That's what's so funny about Tamra is that she puts herself in these situations where she has to be friends with these people she doesn't even like. She does not like Emily.

Remember when Emily came on the show and she's like, oh, you're so disgusting. I can't believe you're on, What are you, a party planner? Ew, gross! You're friends with that weird bunko gay with a mullet. Who would want to be friends with you? But now she has to be friends with her because she's ostracized everybody else, you know?

It's like you're losing your own game, man. Congratulations, here is your prize, Emily. Emily's like, all I'm saying is I told her all along if you're gonna bring this up, if Katie's gonna bring this up, you're gonna go after Heather DeBrow. You better have your ducks in a row. You better have your T's crossed,

your I's dotted, your P's looped, your Q's with the little thing at the bottom of them because she will tear you apart. Why is Heather so scary to everybody? I don't know, I love it. I love that there's someone that they're all ultimately very afraid of. But I mean, I guess you could argue

that Heather kind of does win because that girl Noella's gone, and then who was, but last year they went up against Heather and Heather lost that season and she came back kind of groveling, right? And then she came after Shannon. Taylor Armstrong's gone. She tried that shit but Shannon kind of won that season against Heather.

So I mean I got you one with Taylor Armstrong but Taylor Armstrong's a mess. She's Taylor Armstrong and she was just a friend of so. Noella's gone. Taylor Armstrong is gone and I just checked Malibu country not on the air. So I think we know that. Reba McIntyre later. Reba McIntyre as we're calling her. You know what?

RIP Betty White. But maybe I would look into that. I would just look into it a little bit. That's all I'm saying. So good. As these, you know, their art section, which, you know, I love a good Home Goods art section. I'm like, I hope there's a zebra that has a glitter on the stripes and a horn like a unicorn somewhere

that I can fit in my house. I'm kidding, I gotta go down. But there was a picture, like a pink and blue painting of Betty White. And I was like, this is kind of amazing. Like, can I make this work? Am I really this campy of a gay that I can make this work? I don't know that I can, but I was kind of looking at it

and I was like, oh, I wonder what's behind it. It was a Rue McClanahan one, and then behind that was a Bea Arthur one. And I was like, well, surely these are home goods because they don't have the complete set. Yes. And then there was a Stelghetti at the very end. Wow, and you didn't get all four? No, I just, I don't know.

I just, I couldn't let myself do it, but God, it was amazing. So please, whoever hears this, go to the Home Goods Enventura and get those paintings. It's very important, but don't just buy one. You have to buy all four. Don't separate them, okay? They're like little cats and you adopt cats

and they're like, you have to stay together. They're like little cats and you adopt cats and they're like, can I have to stay together? They're sisters. Wait, I didn't know there was a Home Goods on Ventura. Is that by Michaels? If you wanna move here. Listen, I wasn't sure about moving here. I was like, Ben's gonna mock me for the rest of my life

if I move to the Valley. And also I just don't know if this is the right decision. Like coming back to LA, et cetera, et cetera. But a block away from my house is a watch what happens billboard with Andy Cohen's wonky face right there. And so I was like, that's a sign, right? And then right next to that is a home goods. So guys, I follow the signs. So Jesus led me is what I'm saying. Literally Jesus led me here. So don't argue with me, property tax people. Maybe if you're lucky, you'll find Gina in there someday.

Oh my God. Speaking of terrible fat, C3 Po over there. Gina, what is this look that Gina is wearing in the confessionals? This is just embarrassing. Well, it's like she, it's like she attached some lasagna noodles to one side of her head and then brushed them over to the other side. The lasagna noodle hair, the C3 Po outfit, it's like a sardine can, if a sardine can was like a toothpaste container.

Like, I don't even know what it is. I don't know what she's thinking. Again, I will say, make some gay friends, please. Do yourself a favor and like be nice to some gays because you are being, you're an awful, awful bigot if you're walking out of the house like that and there's no one in your life to tell you, girl. It's homophobic, let's be honest.

It speaks. Well, I just feel like. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay.

I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay.

I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not gay. I'm not love you guys, even the ones I'm mean to, you know?

Like I would even help you, but you know you're a real monster if you can't get any gay to tell you. Even an Orange County gay, and they're used to a bunch of Republican assholes being mean to them. No offense to everybody, you know? It's a very specific type out there. So if you don't have anybody telling you, girl, you need some help, this isn't good,

then it must mean you're a horrible bigot. Okay, fire Gina. That's my point. It's time to cancel Gina. Yeah, the disco ball thing across the chest is like not my favorite look, but then the new look that she debuted today with the lasagna hair, I was like, wow.

It just gets worse and worse and worse for her. Well, it's like metallic. It looks like a pipe. It looks like a superhero. Okay, so you know when you're at Universal Studios and then they have superheroes and they're like, look, it's a pipe. I'm bending the pipe. And it turns out the pipe is just made out of a pool noodle.

That's what it looks like. It's a big pool noodle, a big blonde pool noodle on her head. It's a pool noodle pipe. No, her dress looks like a pool noodle. Oh, her dress. Yeah, it's just everything's wrong. So anyway, let's go back to Heather and Terry having breakfast.

So Heather's like, what I didn't like was Katie told all the girls this paparazzi stuff, but why did Gina allow that to happen? And then there's a knock at the door and there's Gina actually. Gina is like, she's like, oh my God, did you call me? I heard my name in a rich person's mouth and I showed up because I thought there might be some free food. Oh my God, oh my God, did you call me? I heard my name in a rich person's mouth and I showed up because I thought

there might be some free food. Oh my God, oh my God, croissants, how nice. So we knew this was gonna happen, right? And Gina knew it was gonna happen, which is why Gina is upset with how Katie handled it. Because Gina's like, I'm trying to talk shit behind people's back and not get caught, come on. And it backfired, so of course Heather's like, I gave that girl a pleather jacket one time.

So she comes in and she's like, what's going on here? That's a lot of medication you've got on the table, Terry. I feel so bad. Oh my God, this pill box is like six of them here. I can't believe you haven't had to break it in half and send the other half of the pill box to another place. He's like, so you know, thinners, blood thinners, et cetera, blood pressure, I don't know, cellulosis, cirrhosis. I'm just gonna start saying things because I really love the concerned blinks you're giving me. She's like, I feel bad.

Just feel bad that you're having these pills. And then there's another knock on the door and it's Jen. So Heather has summoned the poor people to her country club. Oh, come on in. I'm like, I'm surprised that Terry wasn't there in like a Santa costume ringing a bell with a basket, you know, he's like, ho, ho, ho, we finally brought you all the things that people have donated. I'm so excited you're here. Welcome to Galentine's day.

Today you all get canned things and we're going to Windex windows. Do you understand? Windexo el windows. Here, here's some paper towels and some Windex ladies. Get to workin'. At the end of the day you get nothing for nothing. And then you can say for the life of the thank you so much for having me. Thank you. Thank you so much.

It's really, really good to be here. Now repeat after me girls. The rain in Spain falls mainly on our yacht. Okay, now you do it Gina. Paul's mainly on our yacht. Okay, now you do it, Gina. Calentines! And Gina's like, oh, we're having a calentine. So Heather's like, here we are doing curly things. I have full face masks.

Masks, masks. One brightens, one hydrates, one energizes, and one firm lifts and hydrates. The only way they activate is while you're holding a mop in your hand. Now gather round everyone. I read about Galentine's Day and these things in the back of a reader's digest when I was passing by a magazine stand to find snacks for Gina. Okay, so first we are going to have a mask to energize. So this is for you, Gina. And she's like, oh my God, I'll enjoy. I'm really tired.

Yeah, I'm like, by the way, I'm like so sorry about the Katie stuff. Like I knew you were like upset. So I'm like really so sorry. Like, do you feel bad? I feel bad. I feel like really bad. Cause you know, now I just, I'm confused and I'm irritated.

There, I said it. I said it. That's right. I said it while hydrating my face. I said it with an energetic mask on. She's like, well, the weird thing is I really like GD and I thought you guys were going to be good fans. And I'm still getting to know her and And listen, I'm your friend, Heather.

I'm your friend. She goes, but wait, you're my friend, and I would expect you to tell her that that is not okay, okay? What she did is not okay. Do you understand me? Are you my friend? Do you understand that?

Hold on. Maybe you can scroll through your phone and find me a photo of you in a hydrating and energizing mask that Katie gave you. Oh, wait, you can scroll through your phone and find me a photo of you in a hydrating and energizing mask that Katie gave you. Oh, wait, you can't. Claw hands, claw hands. You got clawed. You got clawed.

So, Shannon, we go back to Shannon and Katie and Shannon's like, well, you know, Heather is ultra sensitive. And I think she might be the most sensitive person in the whole group. Hold on, let me look out the whole group. Hold on. Let me look out the window there. Why are you not standing in front of the window?

So I know that you're still with me, Katie. Katie, I think that it's clear that Heather Dubrow is the most sensitive person in this group. But one moment, I'm sensing some toxins in the air. I think that maybe your golf shoes, do those have BPAs? Because I think they are be your golf shoes, where they, do those have BPAs? Cause I think they are leeching into the environment. Oh, hyperventilating on golf BPAs. Anyway, yes, Heather is the most sensitive

person in this group, yes. Well, I really never meant to push her buttons. Oh, you didn't, Katie? You didn't mean to push Heather Dubrow's buttons when you went to every single person who knows her on the cast to accuse her of calling paparazzi and then bringing screenshots, which you brought up in front of everybody there. Really? You didn't mean to press her buttons? That is so crazy. Also doing this to all the Beverly Hills ladies who you know she's trying to impress. Wow.

That's crazy. What a crazy accident. I mean, if it's true, I mean, why is she even denying it? And Katie's like, well, I have crazy accident. you know, accepting something from another friend and ha! There it is! And there's the proof! That bitch is going down! So she reads it, she's reading it and Katie's like, this person I got the information has no reason to lie. Well, I'm going to read this. Now, does Heather Dubrow, the lady with the black eyes and the claw hands, does she call paparazzos to take pictures of her and her crazy-faced husband You too, bro. The lady with the black eyes and the claw hands,

does she call paparazzos to take pictures of her and her crazy faced husband to get into TMZ? And look at the word, look at the word. It says yes. Oh, well. Why don't you ask her, why don't you ask her friend, do you know where Shannon Bedore lives? And would you mind taking some pictures of Shannon Bedore?

I feel so alone in this relationship, Katie. I just am so alone. And Katie's like, I mean, you think I made that up? No, absolutely not. I mean, from what I know about you, you would never make something up. And your name again is, by the way, I'm sorry. We just met, right?

Katie's like, yeah, no, of course I didn't make that up. I mean, look, Gina hung me out to dry. And I think that when it comes to Gina, she regrets telling me to say it, and she's terrified of disappointing Heather. I mean, she is pretty good at this. She's like, oh yeah, Gina, I guess Gina regrets forcing me

to do that to Heather DuBerho. Yeah, she's pretty good. So back to Emily and Tamara. Emily's like, I think the friendship with Heather and Gina, like Gina like stands by Heather because you know, Gina's like basically looks at Heather like big banking and no one really likes an overdraft fee but at the end of the day without those loans,

how are you gonna pay your house? Yeah, she says, yeah, she stands by Heather no matter what. And when it comes to me, she'll call me out because she and I have a real friendship. And Tamra's like, yeah, that's what you need in a friend, batch. So, like a friend, someone who like stands by a friend, no matter what is the shitty friendship and the friend who undermines the other friend and calls him out embarrasses them. That's the good friend. That's how warped this cast has become.

And Tamra's like, she's afraid of a badge. And she's like, yeah, it's like walking on eggshells, you know, like you don't want to get her mad. Well, yeah, but now it's going to be interesting with Katie because, you know, Heather's going to be completely done with her and I don't know, you know what, we're going to be interesting with Katie because, you know, Heather's going to be completely done with her. And I don't know, you know what, we're going to be going to Katie's funeral pretty soon. Oh my god, this whole Heather Dubrow is so scary is just not working for me.

Heather Dubrow is not scary. She's just rich. But they also just have, well, rich is scary. But you know, they also have to get it together in terms of like, what kind of reaction do they want from this like scary Heather Dubrow? Like on the one hand, they're saying Katie is so stupid because she tried to go up against Heather and Heather's scary and Heather's gonna destroy her. Katie is stupid for even trying to do that.

And then they're like, oh my God, I can't believe Gina. She's like, she's like scared of she's scared of Heather. Wait, I forgot my point. I was gonna have a point about this. It's like they're mad. It's like they're mad at Gina for being scared of Heather, but then they are like wanting Katie to acknowledge, they want Katie to lean in that Heather is scared.

I don't know. I think the point is not good about 10 seconds ago. They're highlighting that they're ass kissers and that they're only going to be mean to people that they think they're stronger than. And that's what's always bothered me about Tamra. Because of course you're gonna go for Jen, you're gonna go for Gina when that's necessary.

You're gonna go for Shannon, people that you consider weak, but people you consider strong and rich, you're not gonna touch, you know? And that's just no fun. It's not fun just watching people punch down all the time. You know, punch up, look up. Yeah, so now Gina's back with Heather in the process of disavowing her relationship with Katie.

And she's like, you know what? I haven't even known her that long, but I feel like I know her like enough that to know that this probably isn't indicative of like who she really is. And Heather's like, you know what? I haven't even known her that long, but I feel like I know her like enough that to know that this probably isn't indicative of like who she really is. And Heather's like, oh really? When did you meet her? Um, it was a couple of months ago through Sutton, so like another rich person, maybe someone who might actually be richer than you, dare I say it? And Heather's like, oh, oh really? And when did she tell you all of this? Um, like a couple of months ago.

Oh really? Like before Sutton's Christmas party, which I was invited to. Yeah, before Sutton's Christmas party. It was before Sutton's Christmas party. Um, and you're right that this is the ultimate trump card because Heather can't even get mad, but she is going to get mad, but she can't compete because Sutton's kind of richer. Well, I don't know at this point if Sutton's richer, actually, because Heather's pretty rich now. That house was very expensive that they sold. But the fact that Gina is, she's betraying Heather

through Katie, who is being brought to this house on the show that Heather is trying to get onto and is as rich, if not richer, than Heather is a pretty low blow. Well, Gina is basically flexing like you're not the only rich person I know now. So guess what? You're not the only person spunking off of, lady. I'm cleaning plenty of houses.

Yeah. So then Jen is like, I do think Gina's to blame for this going as far as it did. And Gina claims to know Heather very, very well. So I don't know. Gina ever thought this would ever be funny for Heather. for this going as far as it did and Gina claims to know Heather very very well so I don't know Gina ever I don't know Gina ever thought this would ever be funny for Heather I mean I don't know if anything really is funny for Heather except you know getting out of Gordon hose and you know attacking her servants. The last time I really saw Heather laugh when we were in the car

and we were on the freeway and we were at a stoplight and uh she told her driver to roll down the window and there was a man who had a sign that said, why lie, I just need a beer. And Heather just, she stopped on the perfect, can we just have a flashback to that moment? Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. And then she threw a diet coke can at his head.

So Heather goes, you know what's upsetting me to me is why, Gina, did you not tell me this in December? And Gina's like, well, I thought it was in the best interest of everybody to let that go and never bring it up again. Plus I was talking shit about you and I didn't want you to know I was talking shit about you because I hadn't really locked down a friendship with the other rich person just yet. So I just wanted to just keep it all under wraps. Yeah, like I thought it would be being if I brought it up because like I wanted Katie to bring it up.

Like what do you think? Because Gina is so bad at this still and she was trying to get someone else to come for you on camera. That's why, duh. Yeah. I mean, so then Heather's like, what you fucked up Josie? Yeah, I did fuck up. I fucked camera. That's why. Duh. Yeah. I mean, so then Heather's like,

yeah, I did fuck up. I fucked up. I feel so I know you feel bad. I feel bad. Really? I feel bad. I have a question since when did Gina and Heather become so close again? Because last, wasn't it just last season that Gina started to pull away from Heather and we're all like, this is so fucked up. Like Heather, Heather was so nice to Gina the year before and now Gina suddenly anti Heather because Heather had the balls to say, stop complaining about your ex so much to Travis. You're going to send him away. And then she hates Heather all season long. And then it culminates with, Tamara says this lie

about this something about calling them losers at BravoCon. And Gina's like, oh my God, I can't, I can't even handle this anymore. I can't even be here. I can't even sit next to you. And she like moves away from her when they're on their trip and everything. And last I saw, it seemed like their relationship was just in the garbage. And now suddenly they're back to being like besties. Well, Gina's a user and Gina's trying to get into real estate and Heather just sold a house for 50 zillion dollars and also got her son into one of the top real estate firms. just sold a house for $50 zillion and also got her son into one of the top real estate firms. She got her son working for Altman already.

I saw him at the Altman whatever on million dollar listing and Gina's like, where's my hookup? What the hell, bro? So Gina's, she's playing ball. She's being nice because Heather has, if she can sell one Heather house, she can get her kids at least another half bedroom. She's being nice because Heather has, if she can sell one Heather house, I mean she can get her kids like a half, at least another half bedroom, you know? Yeah, I think that's probably what it is.

So she's like, yeah, I fucked up. I'm really fucked up and I'm like, really sorry. And Heather's like, thank you. Thank you. Thank you for admitting that. I'm going to hold it against you for about four more episodes. Commercials, here comes one right now. Thank you for admitting that. I'm going to hold it against you for about four more episodes. DIVORCED BEHEADED DIED, DIVORCED BEHEADED SURVIVED.

We know the six wives of Henry VIII as pawns in his hunt for a son, but their lives were so much more than just being the king's wives. I'm Arisha Skidmore Williams. And I'm Brooke Zifrin. And we're the hosts of Wondery's podcast, Even the Royals. In each episode, we'll pull back the curtain on royal families, past and present, from all over the world, to show you the darker side

of what it means to be royalty. We rarely see Henry VIII's wives in their own light, as women who use the tools available to them to hold onto power. Some women won the game, others lost, but they were all unexpected agents in their own stories. Being a part of a royal family might seem enticing, but more often than not,

it comes at the expense of everything else, like your freedom, your privacy, and sometimes even your head. Follow even the royals on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. Go deeper and get more of the story with Wondery's top history podcasts, including American Scandal, Legacy, and Black History for Real.

So Emily and Shane go to an anniversary dinner at, I mean, I'm proud that it wasn't Chuckie Cheese. I mean, this is a Shane dinner. But they went to a place called Truly Pizza. Go fuck yourself with that name, Truly Pizza. I don't believe that your pizza is good, there I said it. No one with good pizza would be called Truly Pizza. That sounds like fake sugar.

It sounds like truly, truly is usually the word that companies use when they want to tell you that they substituted in something that would normally be there. No, it truly is pizza. Don't you worry about it. Yeah, I don't want to eat a truly pizza. If it was just called pizza, I'd be happy, but not truly pizza. It's like a guilty conscience name. No, no, no, no, this is truly pizza. Don't worry about it. Is there cauliflower on the crust? Yes, perhaps. Is it all cauliflower? Yes. Is the tomato sauce actually cauliflower sauce? Yes. Is it just cauliflower? Yes, but it's truly

pizza. Yeah, it's like for real beef. So they go and it was like, oh, yeah, 15 years is pizza. King of Smurfs. Ten and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and an and kids all day trying to work cause someone's got to own this house. Am I right? You know, um, she's like, well today, what I did was I went to the gym and I didn't see you there. It's like, oh, well all of a sudden you're high and mighty cause you go to the gym. And she's like, well, you know, Shane has made zero effort to be any healthier or do anything about his health

at all. Like, Hey, um, I hate to break it to you, you're currently having your anniversary party at a place called Truly Pizza, so. No kidding. Why don't you start there, start there. I know, that's like my mom. Listen, I am so sick of you gaining weight every time I send you to fat camp.

Now go take this box of little debbies into the other room and you think about that. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Also, Emily, congrats on finding Ozempic, but you don't get to take Ozempic and then fat shame everybody around you, you fucking hypocrite. And I don't care what she's saying with her whole like,

well, I just took it for a minute, but then my stomach hurt, but now I work out all the time. You are still getting help and you're not gonna get, you're not gonna get me to believe for five seconds that you're not. And personally, I'm not even shaming you for that. I love Ozempic, I love it, I'm on it.

I will be on it probably for the rest of my life. Until I, if I find out I'm growing another head, I will still be taking that shit. But it doesn't give me the right to go around fat shaming people. Cut the shit, you just got here. When you've done 10 years in a row of like doing a marathon or something, okay, maybe.

But you don't get to be like thinner for five minutes and start this shit. Get out of here fast. That's bullshit. I like that when you talked about growing another head at that moment, Bueller popped his head up and it looked like his head was coming out of your neck. I was like, well, that was pretty quick.

That happened pretty quickly. Please welcome our third co-host, Bueller, attached to Ronnie's neck. So- Mr. Bueller, like fat shaming people while he's just basically living for treats. Emily's like, so I actually did some research tonight. I googled 15 years of marriage and I found some very interesting responses from earthlink.net. Okay, interesting questions for your spouse. If you could go back 15 years, would you still marry me?" And he's like,

ummmmm yeah. Oh, do you want to try that one again? Would you still marry me? Yeah. Uh, uh, would you still marry me? Yeah. The king of sarcasm is dead. King of sincerity! Dark Awesome is dead. King of sincerity. Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da. These two can try to convince me that they're happy all they want, but it's your 15th anniversary and you have to pull out the let's play a game.

That's really sad. What are you, a last season Rinna? Like, come on. What are you having to do? Are we missing Galentine's? This is so sad so he's like well if you can go back 15 years who would you marry and she's like it's Charlie Hanum single you don't understand I'm in my sincere phase oh

sorry about that he's like I don't find that funny but go ahead to the next question it chaos Narcasm it did not show up today so she's like I don't find that funny but go ahead to the next question. Hey chaos Narcasm. It did not show up today So she's like, okay. Um, do I have any silly or odd quirks? Yeah insisting on taking fucking boudoir shots every two weeks. Okay Your odd quirk is going to the gym instead of helping me raise the children But actually he says that her eyelashes are everywhere. They're all over the place. There are some of them that are even on her back.

Yeah, and now he's like, it looks like a bunch of caterpillars in my house. Do you say nice things about me when I'm not around? Absolutely. Okay, let me give you, give me a last example of something nice you said about me. Well, she likes taking pictures in thongs and putting them on our yard in the form of lawn signs.

Does that count? Well, I always tell them that kids, you have the best mom. If you ever saw her, you you would know and she loves you and she's like oh that's sweet and yeah I do it all the time and then she says this means a lot to me because I feel like I broke the cycle like mmm I don't think this means anything I think he's just telling you nice things because it's your anniversary I'll tell you who's not gonna break a cycle Shane because he refuses to exercise. Yes. I've got a sub in my purse. Oh, I'm so relatable.

So she goes on, she goes on about how difficult childhood was, etc. You know, it's an Emily scene. It's a very Emily. It's very Emily coded. Yeah, basically, he gets her a ring. He gets her a new version, the engagement ring. She gives him the photo and she's like, yeah, 15 years is a huge milestone. Shane and I are at this point where I don't know. I feel like we just really understand each other. And I mean, at the end of the day, Shane's really the only person that I want to spend the rest of my life with. Oh God, Shane's the only person I want to spend the rest of my life with. Oh, did I break the cycle? Did I break the cycle?

So they bring out like a big wrapped pizza, I guess. Is it a pizza? I don't know. Oh no, they bring out the gift. They bring out his gift. And the waiter is like, here's your gift. And he goes, wow, I don't think that's mine because it says the luckiest man in the world. He's back. You're the luckiest man saying because you have me. So she's like, I hope Shane and I can stay together for another 15. And I hope that the next 15 is a little bit healthier. And maybe I can get Shane on the treadmill and we could lift some weights and make sure that he has a life insurance policy and that's me as the beneficiary. So he opens a gift and it's an Emily Boudoir photo he's like

thanks thanks a lot thanks for bringing me to a pizza place to give me another picture of you in your underwear. This is great. So now it's the morning and Katie goes to a bakery with Gina and they sit down outside and Katie's asking her what she's been up to and Gina's like, oh my god, I had like a little Valentine's with like Travis and like, you know, like we're like trying to figure out this new normal. So like I sat on one side of the restaurant, he sat on the other,

we just sort of like FaceTime to each other. It was nice. I actually read news on my telephone and then he watched all the kids at his table. You know what? I see that there's like hope and like a chance that like, you know, look, look, we're like an unconventional family and like we can redefine our family

like any way we'd like to, okay? We're allowed to change the rules about what family is and what the obligations are to family. Jen is not allowed to, though, okay. We are committed to make it work. So Katie's like, well, it's cliche, but you know what they say, if it's meant to be, it will be, K-sirrah, sirrah.

Do you know what I mean? You're really boring, can we just get to it? Why do you seem so tired today? I mean, I know that's how you talk. I'm a golf person. Yeah, yeah, I get it, but like, also you look tired. She's like, yeah, because you know, I'm really in a weird spot because I really felt abandoned

by you a little bit, you know? I mean, you a weird spot because I really felt abandoned by you a little bit, you know what I mean? You took Heather's side and I felt like there was a way that you could have stayed a little bit neutral in that. Yeah, but like, I'll be honest, I'm not gonna stay neutral, like, cause I did have your back and like I told you not to bring it up

cause you're like not rich enough to do that. And she was like, yeah, but when we first talked about it, you know, then all of a sudden it was it was just like too far gone. Yeah, but that was doing Katie you did that you brought on yourself. Okay. And okay.

And she tells us I didn't want Katie to communicate that thing that she's been communicating to everybody else but he other, but like maybe that's the one area I can see that Katie feels that I wasn't supporting her, but like, I'm not gonna support you through your bullshit. I feel like that's the only thing that I've ever wanted to make a meme out of Gina saying, cause I feel like it's the most Gina thing to say ever.

Like sitting there in that terrible outfit and that terrible hair going, I'm not gonna support you in your bullshit. Yeah, the bullshit that like, and this is just, meanwhile, all of Gina's storylines, like, I just want like some support. I just feel like I'm just like alone in this right now. Like she didn't even call me.

Yeah, so she's like, I'm between a rock and a hard place, like alone in this right now. Like she didn't even call me. Yeah. So she's like, I'm between a rock and a hard place. Cause like, if I would have come to your Eid, then Hilda would have got pissed at me. And now she's mad at both of us and I can't help repair it. Cause like, honestly,

I'm like not even allowed in a house anymore. Like she changed the code to the service elevator. You know what? Like you have to understand, like, you know, I feel like in all of this, I probably shouldn't have had Heather's back more because she gave me a nice dress once. And so like, you have to understand Heather's like,

I'm very close with Heather, except for like when I realized how much I hate her and like, I don't want to talk to her. And I'm like, not gonna jeopardize my own friendships with wealthy people because the choices that you make. And Katie's like, listen, I was yelled at by Heather Dubrow and I wasn't even mad at that, but I value you. And she's like, listen, people have always called me

great value. You're not the first one. So you're welcome. And I don't want you to feel bad. Do you feel bad? And Katie's like, I feel bad. She's like, oh my God, do you feel bad? She's like, I do. I feel really bad. Oh my God. I'm so sorry. You feel bad. I did not mean to make you feel bad. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that like I, like, I just

like left you out to dry. Like that was like not my intention. I just wanted to show allegiance to a wealthy person. And I'm so sorry that you like mess this up for yourself. I'm so sorry. And then Katie's like, I really love Gina. Do you? You met some weirdo in a terrible outfit, presumably at Sutton's house. You do not love Gina.

Give me a fucking break. And welcome to Housewives. You got with someone who was like, oh my God, you should bring up all that dirt you have on Heather on camera. That's amazing, it's gonna be an amazing story and you can finally take Heather to task. I mean, people are gonna love that.

You know, people have been trying to take Heather down for years and no one's been able to do it. I believe in you, Katie, you go girl. And then Katie tried it and Gina's like, oh my God, why would you do that? Why would you put my name in the middle of that? Like if we're gonna be friends, you can't bring me into things that I was a part of.

Yeah, that's 100% what happened. And then Gina's like, well, you have to tell them, because otherwise I'm gonna have to tell them. So Katie's like, yeah, no, I really love Gina. I mean, admittedly, when I met her at Sutton's party, I did think that maybe she was a reporter from Huffington Post, but no, it turns out

she's actually a cast member on the show, which is so great, so democratic of the producers. And you know, just makes me think back on every situation where we talked and everything I said is maybe going to be used against me when I didn't feel like that was our relationship. Like I'm a fucking idiot. Like I don't know. It just like really sucks. Well, I just want you to know that like, I feel really bad and this situation is really tricky for me

and I want it to get better. And she's like, I know, but you know what? Maybe it just won't for a little while. I feel bad. So now Shannon is going to meet her dad, Gene, at a restaurant and he's just sitting there just- Can't wait to talk about her dad, Gene, at a restaurant. And he's just sitting there, just- Can't wait to talk about alcoholism with Gene, having a fucking gigantic glass of wine

at 10 in the morning or whatever it is. I know, this is like full on waspy luncheon right here. So she sounds like, oh, well, you got a glass of wine. That's quite a pour. I guess you didn't receive my text message, which said, dad, please don't drink at lunch because it makes me bad. It also makes me thirsty and you know I can't drink on camera. So I hope you enjoy that red wine.

I'll just have a glass of water and tears. Thank you so much. I'll please make sure that water is sparkling and poured over ice with Belvedere. Thank you. No, you know, there's a park that's a block from my house, dad. There's a couple there and they were there with their dog and they said they met Gene the Machine. It's wacky, dad. What were you doing at the park? They also said they met my BMW when it crashed into their house. So it was really awkward.

It was an awkward conversation. So, Dad, do you still introduce yourself as Gene the Machine? Dad, he's like, I do, and I do. Sounds good. That's what I do, is I'm Gene, Gene the Machine. Well, I do have some similarities to my father, but I don't go to the links that he does.

And I'm just never gonna prove of that name, Gene the Machine. Just sounds like somebody begging to be banned from living within 10 yards of a school. I, of course, am not in favor of any machine that has not passed rigorous EPA standards. So Shannon's like, you know, my dad you know, you know, my dad, we both like to have fun. Is that such a bad thing? And of course we see flashbacks of Shannon getting wasted and being ridiculous over the years, which, you know, never get, never get sick of those flashbacks.

Yeah. Um, well, so I'd like to have fun. Is that such a bad thing? And then the dad goes, no, she goes, do they have dad? They have sea bass here. He goes, I like tacos. She goes, no, she goes, do they have, dad, they have sea bass here. He goes, I like tacos. She goes, oh wow, you see what I mean? Two piece in a pod. So the waiter drops, drops off the tacos and Shannon's like, oh dad, well, I need to get a car and then get a breathalyzer put in the car. And that's part of my punishment for my DOI. It's going to remind me every day of my stupid decision that I made to drive. And he's like, well, are you gonna cut down on the drinking? He's like, well, that I barely drink is it is. You know me, one drink, one drink Shannon. You know, remember in high school

when they would call me one drink Shannon? They used to call you Shannon be poor because you would always be pouring Shannon. No, can't, I stay on the Shannon the or pay, dad. They said said wow It's almost like you're a soda machine which would make sense because you're the daughter of Jean the machine Jean the machine Okay, dad. That's that's enough. No one here to see your taco dad. Okay dad. I barely drink. Okay I I live you know if anything I limit myself to two maybe three and sometimes

I don't even order drinks or maybe I I'll have four, but only in certain situations, seven at max. And then we get to the I'm not an alcoholic at all monologue. Well, growing up, did we have a big bottle of Chablis in the refrigerator? Yeah, I mean, who didn't? It was the 70s, the 80s. It wasn't called alcoholism. It was called living your life.

I just come from a fun family fun Shannon's my dad is a machine Have you heard like we have fun, but I didn't see alcohol being used as a coping mechanism I mean, I mean when I was a child, it was just something that I realized helped me forget certain things Coping no forgetting forgetting cope with anything. I'd blacked it all out! But in the end you're just really sad and depressed, especially if you are quote unquote coping with David Bador or quote unquote John Jansen, aka Johnny Jansen. I mean, oh God forbid. God forbid you have a drink or two because the man of your dreams is eating a potato chip in your face and staring you down when all you've done

is say you wanna make quinoa for dinner. I don't like to think of alcohol as a crutch. I like to think of it as a tool. Not an alcoholic, I'm a handyman basically. So it's me fixing things. You know, all machines break down and sometimes they just need a little booze to fix them up. Isn't that right, Dad?

Gene the machine. So Gene's like, well, you hit rock bottom, so now you're gonna go up. I mean, probably won't be in a plane. You won't be able to get a license for that. I'll tell you what's rock bottom. It's ordering a lovely plate of sea bass and you can't even have a glass of spirits to go with it. what's rock bottom is ordering a lovely plate of sea bass and there you can't

even have a glass of spirits to go with it. That's rock bottom. So she says when I was with John, we were drinking all the time and I was miserable. I was. I was. Was that when I brought this Jackie Onassis playing the role of little Orvin Annie outfit? Maybe. So then she's like, oh dad, now I have some bad news. John Jansen is saying that I owe him $75,000 dad.

And if I don't pay him, he's gonna sue me. He says he loaned me that money. He's like, did he? No, dad, as far as I concerned, he was giving me the money. Do you think I would borrow a face? Well, why would he want to sue you when you've paid for everything before? Yes, yes. It said in the letter I have until Tuesday to come up with a repayment plan. I was like, well, I've certainly been saying see you next Tuesday quite a bit since Alexis

Bellino came into the picture, but I certainly didn't mean it in terms of paying back any sort of money. I don't care what it costs. Go fight it. Go for the jugular. Well, okay. I will be the... Can I borrow some money, Dad? I'm sorry. I meant jug of wine. Go for the jug of wine. Can I have... Could you please pass it? Thank you. So... Gene the Juggler. So then we go to Tamra going to Alexis's house and there are crosses everywhere. Yes. And my favorite, I think out of all of the crosses that we saw were drink coasters with crosses on them. Yes. Nothing like getting shit-faced on the, what do you call it?

The symbology of Christ getting crucified. Delicious. Delicious, guys. These coasters are brought to you by Jesus. So, so Tamara comes in, she goes, Oh, I brought cookies for the kids. I love this neighborhood. Alexis is like, so do I.

It's my second time living here. That's right, you live here in this neighborhood gym. I was driving to your house right now and I was like, what fucking world am I driving to Alexis Bellino's house to sit in her living room and eat cheese and drink Diet Coke, bitch? The world where you're both desperate enough to stay on TV that you're gonna abuse some poor alcoholic lady

to do it for no reason. And she was like, I mean, who would ever thought we're going to sit here and eat cheese and drink dark coffee? And Alexis is like, you never would have been even invited before. Times have changed. I feel like the Alexis I knew 10 years ago is not the Alexis I know today. I'm like, it's the exact same Alexis. It's literally the same one. It's just that like, she's like, she's working for you now instead of against you. So Tamara starts talking about the golf thing and Alexis is like, why would Gina,

like, why would, uh, why would Katie not invite me? Like I live on a golf course. Why wouldn't I be invited to a golf party? I mean, that's like not inviting someone to fly somewhere when they live by an airport. It just doesn't make any sense. Like, are you going to not invite someone to a campfire when you know somebody who lives next to a fire, a firehouse subs? Yeah. And Tam was like, well, you know, she's become friendly with Shannon and I guess she felt like it would be disrespectful to Shannon if you were there. So I guess she kind of picked a side.

So I guess that's my way of saying Kate sucks. Want me to be mad at Katie now? She didn't she doesn't like you. She chose someone else every you like says be mad at Katie. Be mad at Katie. So you invite Debbie Downer over Lexi? I mean, if you're going to have a, who's gonna be more fun, huh? Look at me shaking my boobs.

This one, this one's fun. Ha ha ha. Happy go lucky, Lexi. Lexi. When are you Lexi? When did that happen? She's rebranding herself. I think she's rebranding some sort of like

Johnny and Lexi thing. Like, I don't know. You're really trying to pull a fun Shannon too? You are such a fun stalker. Oh my god, you are such a stalker. We already have a fun Shannon. Go play with your ripoff dog and your ripoff saggy bald boyfriend. Fucking poser. So, Tamara, like what happened with you and Shannon at the party? Like, because I know you don't want to talk about her. And Tamra's like, nothing. Nothing, really, Tamra? Nothing? Why be cautious, all right? No pun intended, because she can't have

causes anymore because she doesn't have alcohol in her. I don't agree with a lot of things that went down between us. Her being an alcoholic us, you know, her being an alcoholic and we told her stop being alcoholic, stupid useless piece of shit. Well, you know what, for you, like, I feel kind of like as your friend, as your friend happy go lucky Lexi, I feel like I know she's like really shit on you and like done a lot, you know, right? She has not. How has she shit on you? Tamra's big complaint about Shannon was that when Shannon was in pain and sobbing every day, she was calling Tamra.

How is that hurting Tamra? She was so depressed and she called me. What a b**ch. But also like the whole thing that Shannon would call all the time, but then when Tamra needed Shannon, Shannon wasn't there. Sure. But also you've been down this path a few years ago. Like this is done. Like you can't relitigate this. You guys figured it out. You guys settled it. And you had a whole thing last year where you're like, I just feel like at the end of the day, we're just like sisters. And I just want to put like bygones by bygones. And like, I don't know. Like I just can't for you. Like you just can't keep going back to this well that Shannon like it's a one way friendship with Shannon calling on the phone. don't know, like I just can't for you. Like you just can't keep going back to this well that Shannon, like it's a one-way friendship

with Shannon calling on the phone. Because you know, I kind of can see that, but also like just stop answering the phone and then you'll be okay. Well she was only answering the phone to use everything that Shannon told her against her at a later time, which is why Tamara always answers the phone, you know. Well, you know what? Alcoholics abuse people that are close to them. That's what she's doing.

That's what she's doing. I've been upside down for 10 years. I mean, ever since I've known her. Like, everything's a disaster all the time. Yeah. I mean, it's like going to McDonald's and complaining about having delicious french fries. Like, what do you think it is?

That's the restaurant you're at. That's what we're serving, OK? Shannon serves a billion sobby mess tears a year. Just deal with it, Tamara. Okay. You're in the wrong restaurant. Yeah, it's true. Like the evidence has been there. You've complained about it, et cetera. You're the one who went groveling back to her last year. So don't expect me to feel bad that you suddenly are having some sort of epiphany that you knew all along. And of course we get flashbacks. I feel banned. And we get flashbacks, which of course start off with the classic Shannon, you will all see the truth someday thing when they're trying to gaslight her into thinking that she needs

like a 5150. Yeah, they're showing her, they're showing these flashbacks of Shannon supposedly being a monster, but they're all of Tamra trying to gaslight Shannon into like going to a mental hospital or I mean, they're all of Tamara trying to gaslight Shannon into going to a mental hospital. Or I mean, they're all of Tamara being terrible. I'm not really sure how any of these are supposed to be evidence of Shannon being bad. They're all Tamara pushing her over the edge and then laughing once it works. And Tamara's like, everything was emotional.

Everything was a wreck. It was traumatizing. She would call me crying almost every single day. It's hard to be around somebody like that a lot. I'm like, have you seen your son? Like, I'm sorry. Like when you're talking about people who are hard to be around,

I just think that it gets a lot worse than Shannon. Hello there. This is a two-part recap, okay? This is the end of part one. So thank you so much for listening to this. Just come back a little later for part two. Watch what crappins would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. Strolling the park with Caitlin Clark. She's

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