Watch What Crappens - #2542 Chimp Crazy (E03): Chimpin’ Ain’t Easy

Episode Date: September 4, 2024

The only thing harder than owning a chimp is hiding a chimp.  That’s one of the many dark lessons in episode three of Chimp Crazy, the bananas (!) doc on Max. To watch this recap on video and listen to all of our bonus episodes, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Watch Your Crappins ad free right now. Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watch Your Crapins, a podcast about all that crap we just love to talk about on Bravo TV, although in this case, today we're talking about something on Max, because we're talking Chimp Crazy, episode 3. I'm Ben Mandelker, and joining me today is a man who would never hide chimpanzee in his basement, at least not that I would think. Mr. Ronnie Karam, how are you? I sure as hell would.

If I loved that chimp, I would totally steal it and hide it and make a little basement for it. Of course I would. Okay, take it all back. I apologize. My gosh, have we ever even met. Yeah, I don't know that I necessarily approve, but you know what? I'm here for the journey, guys. Now this is an interesting show for us to recap,

because we, you know, we recap dramatic things sometimes, but for the most part, we keep it fun and light. We mostly like rubber faced ladies yelling at each other for no good reason. But you know, this has been a fun one, but God, this show gets dark. Oh my God, the show gets dark and this is probably at least once an episode, but especially this episode, I text you like, what do we do? How do we do this? This is really dark. Now, thankfully, they save it every time by having so much fucking crazy packed into

it that maybe we could just skip a lot of the,. Just be like, that was traumatic. Next. Yeah. And do like I do in my own life and just bury it, bury it deep, bury it deep guys, bury it deep. Cause it's dark. I continue to be amazed by how smart these chimps are, the way they really do seem to understand language, you know, and the way they have, they know how to use things. Like they know how to wipe poop off their window to some degree, or they know how to open up wrappers and use bottles and things like that. They don't

understand tools. It's really amazing. But I'm also amazed by these humans that really think that chimps are their children. I don't understand it. I'm like, you're playing with fire because you wait around long enough that chimps are gonna tear your face off. I'm telling you right now, be careful. Well, we open with, this is episode three, by the way, for those following along, we open with police cam footage, which, you know, it's nice to see the cameras are turned on

because that's, you know, you have to put in a request for that sometimes these days. But the police cam footage is on, so we see it. And there's a guy who, an officer who's talking about, he's into the radio and he's like, due to risk of life, I'm gonna be engaging the chimp. And we see him, it's like full call of duty for anybody who's played that.

So first person shooter, it's like full first person shooter of this guy with like a machine gun. For lack of a better term, because listen, obviously I'm terrible at Call of Duty. Like that's really, that's one of those straight things where the gay really shows where I'm like, this should be the most fun game on PlayStation. Everybody loves this game. No, not. I don't know if it's too gay, but I literally, and it's not to say that gay people can't be in the military and shoot and all that stuff,

but I walk into a room and I see a gun pointed at me and start shooting at me and I squeal like this. Well, I start squealing like that. So that's what I mean by too gay for the game. But anyway, this is like that. And I just start squealing like that. They need to release a gay version of Call of Duty because I think like Call of Duty for gays is like, your Call of Duty is that you have to go to Joann's Fabrics. I'm like, sign me up. That's my kind of Call of Duty. You have to go to the hobby lobby and get more glue gun sticks, but we're not going to tell you what size glue gun they're for. You're like, oh my God, but aren't they mean about abortion? I don't want to go there. I

don't think they like gay rights. You're going. No. Level three. These feathers are so tacky. Level three, you go to Tarjay to buy some deodorant, but then you take an extra lap to see what their home goods are and you come out with about four or five pans or Tupperware items. Well, it could be Target to look for deodorant because that is a call of duty thing because

then you have to find the attendant. In California, you have to get an attendant to open the fucking cage for you because the deodorant is locked up. So you have to go through all the aisles of zombies to find the person to unlock it for. I mean, there's a lot of gay call of duty. Where's deodorant crazy about deodorant that's locked up? Okay. How about PETA?

How about PETA freeze the deodorant out of our cages? How about that? But this is so sad because you know that he is going for a chimp and he's going to kill this chimp. He's got a machine gun. Like what else is he going to do? You know, so, um, not liking this automatically. And I was like, this is a good week to take off. Yay. Labor day. Sorry, champs. Bye busy. But you know what? We started something and we're going to complete. Our call of duty is recapping, chimp crazy. By the way,

when the guy says he's going to be engaging the chimp that is by the way, a sitcom from the eighties starring Suzanne summers, engaging the chimp. I don't know if you ever saw it. It had a one episode. Ron is being like, has been serious or is he nuts? You're not serious. Are you? You're like, has Ben serious or is he not serious? You're not serious, are you? No, I'm not. You're like, wait a second. But then I started going through Suzanne Summer's bio.

I was like, no, she was way too difficult. No one wanted to work with her again after that. Although she was in a sitcom called She's the Sheriff. So I mean, I- Yes, that's true. I do remember that one. You know, they had- I just was wondering if I really slipped that much.

I was like, this really is gay call of duty day. Like a Suzanne sitcom that I don't know, Suzanne summer sitcom, I don't know. The pageant of the champ. I really am just getting beat today. So then we cut to an aerial shot of a ranch style home with a pool and inside the room, inside we see a large cage and it's the Tonka, Tonky B's basement. And Tanya is playing with Tonky B and she's running around this cage. She's got the couch in the center of the room. It's very bad feng shui, I guess is what I'm trying to say.

I don't know how you're supposed to feng shui your chimp prison, but this is very bad because she has like a cage on one half of the room, then the other half of the room is her, her cage, the human cage, but the couch is kind of dividing the human cage into. So she has to run around. Maybe that's the point. She has to run around the couch and she's like playing chase with Tonka from behind the glass and stuff. It was kind of cute. Yeah. What I didn't understand is she lives in this huge

mansion. Why is Tonka's cage so small? Surely the basement's larger than that. Can you not, if you're going to hide the chimp in your basement and you're, you know, fast forward a little bit to how the process happens, as long as like Tonka is somewhere else while she builds this cage, could you give him

some more space? I mean, it's so small. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know if it's cause she wants a room for her to be down there so she can hang out with him. So like half of it has to be couch. I don't know. I was more worried about like that. Yeah. Then she had to go over it. But I liked that she was,

she was addressing Peter's concerns by just making it more colorful. She's like, it's a prettier prison. Look at that. This wall over here is blue and that one's red. And it's like pretty cheerful. So I think Tonka is going to love it. Yeah. So, Eric is like, okay, so then we start finding out because the big, the big surprise at the end of the last episode was that Tonka is alive in the basement. And apparently Eric had no idea. So this is actually kind of hilarious because she fooled the whole crew, right? Which is shocking because she can't keep a damn secret, you know, she keeps letting things

spill and, but she hid this from them the whole time and they're shocked. And so, Eric is like, so we followed the story and Tonka was supposed to be deceased and then we cut to clips of Tanya being interviewed and Dwayne saying, well, how do you explain that? And she's like, oh, I mean, I already said, Sankal never go to a chimp sanctuary. I opted to go, you know, it's a court order. You know, his health doesn't allow him to make a trip across to Florida State and he just gets too unhealthy. So, you know what his health doesn't allow for? Kidnapping and

short-term sedation. You know, short-term sedation is fine. We're really into short-term sedation. Short-term sedation is fine. We're really into short-term sedation here. Health, yeah, jump health. Yeah, look at his arm. It's not fat, it's just fluid. It's just fatty fluid. You know, he's definitely in use in congestive heart failure. Listen, we brought in the best bat in the Ozarks Lake.

His name is Quick-A-Roots guy. He's on the front and all that. Almost, he wears a nice hat. And he says it's liquid. He's all liquid. In fact He's actually he's basically an Thought-out popsicle with hair on it. And so we can't live like this much longer. He can't go to sanctuary I mean, what are they gonna do be nice to him and take care of him. He can't do that Yeah, so I can tell I can go with him a little bit. He's got my pad and he's not a real iPad

It's a kid iPad stupid people iPad. This is my this is my baby has internet has him his his own email account I don't really know what he's gonna do that probably try and order a real iPad with it really Honestly, these things are really smart Yeah, I hope he doesn't sell any send an email when he does. I mean, this is what it is So, you know if by accident I may have ordered like a, you know, 75 inch TV, I was like, well, my monkey ordered it, it wasn't me. So it doesn't mean a full refund,

but I'm not gonna give you the TV back. I don't know what happened to the TV. The TV's deceased. And since you're the ashes of the TV. And so she hands him a cloth through the cage and she's like, all right, well, you need to clean the window. And I'm talking, oh Jesus.

Over here, he threw poop at the window. He threw poop at the window. So now he's, you need to clean the window. Yeah, Tonky, oh, Jesus. Over here, Tank. He threw poop at the window. He threw poop at the window, so now he's gotta clean the poop off the window. I mean, it's cause and effect, Tonk. It was like we were talking about. Over here, come on, Tonk. Right here, Tonk. Ah, that's better.

Here's your poop. Here's the poop tank. And Tonky's just like wiping the poop off his cage, like, damn it. Why do I just keep doing that? I keep telling myself today's the last day I'm throwing poop at the wall and then I do it again and here I am, my own worst enemy, am I right? So now we cut to Eric watching this footage and I feel like half of this episode is Eric trying to explain to the audience why he kept on filming. It's him being

like pretending like he's having a moral quandary when what he really wants to do is like, oh shit, this is gonna be a great documentary, but he has to pretend like he is not sure what to do. I'm like, you know what you wanna do. You wanna make a movie that's gonna become a viral hit like Tiger King. There, you have no moral qualms about this situation. I don't believe for a second,

but he has to kind of be like, oh my God, what do we do? And this is insane. I mean, this is the craziest story ever. What do we do? Maybe we should say something. You heard me America. I have a guilty conscience, right? Okay. Keep filming. Keep filming. Let's think about this really, really deeply for at least another three weeks, guys. Okay. Uh, so they're like, let's call Dwayne, the fake director. So they call Dwayne, and Dwayne's like, yeah, things are getting a little strange over here

because now it's taking a kidnapping turn. So, guys have any plans on how we're gonna handle that? And Eric's like, well, first of all, most important thing is Tonka okay. That's what we really care about. You got that on camera, right? Is Tonka okay? I care about Tonka's welfare right now. Okay, right? Okay, let's keep going. And Duane's like, well, I don't think he's being abused. I mean, he's in a basement,

but I mean, under the circumstances, like when is he not in a basement? You know what I mean? I mean, it's a cage, it's an underground cage. Is that great? No, but he's kind of always in a cage. I don't know. How am I supposed to take this? Is this a human? Because they keep trying to make these moral judgments on like, well, is it bad to leave them in a cage? Well, they're always in a cage. I don't know. It's like, it's Wayne's like, what the fuck do you want me to do? I'm a clown. I'm literally a clown. I can't make this. Why are you asking me? Also, I love that like the animal sanctuary is like the boogeyman. Like, Oh my goodness.

The last thing that we want to do is send him to an animal sanctuary where he'll be taken care of. I mean like that's literally the, that is where you would want it to go. It's in the name sanctuary, but I know Tanya is, um, not Tanya. Oh yeah. Tanya. She's like very concerned that Tonka will go to the animal sanctuary and be killed by the other apes and everything. And I'm like, well, yeah, that would suck. But that's also like nature. And it's like, wouldn't you rather your ape be killed? It's true. I mean, the,

the, the monkeys attack each other in the, in the wild. That's how they, that's just how it is. Right. As opposed to being killed, you know, in a small cage next to the laundry machine, where you live a sad life, darkness and claustrophobia. Pete Okay. So then Eric is talking to Jeremy outside and he's like, okay, gosh, okay. So if we turn her in, you know, well, she won't lead us to anybody else. And I just feel like there's other people that she knows, you know, there's more chimp people out there. There's more people keeping chimps. That's why we got to do it. We're going to find a whole chimp network. We're going to find it. So we're going to find Epstein's list, but for champs. I know that's going to be out there. Yes.

So we can't stop now because we're going to blow the lid off a secret network of chimp people. Right? It's like, uh, sure. And so Jeremy is like, but is that the right thing to do? He's like, I don't know. We're on max. Like, do we have to make these calls? So now, uh, Tanya is being interviewed by Dwayne and he's like, so Peter took all those chimps. Where was Tonka when Peter made the raid and she was like, well, Tonka was actually on the run with me and well on the run. I mean, he was,

you know, passed out. He had poison darted, but he was like on, he was on the being dragged with me, I guess you could say. I mean, literally, literally on the run. I mean, by literally on the run, I mean, he literally, he was in a box lifeless basically while I was driving. He did have runs. You know, it's amazing. He had runs while I was on the run and he still threw it at the wall in his sleep. This guy, he never takes a day off. So this part was crazy to me.

So they show what she actually did to hide him and it's insane that she wasn't caught doing this. And it made me feel like the housewives, whenever something happens off camera and you're like, aren't you guys, especially like you're on vacation, there's cameras there all the time, why would you turn the cameras off? And this is one of those situations. So she says, before I beat it, came and took the kids, Tonka had a massive stroke, which of course is bullshit, you know, but she's, which we think is bullshit. But then we see the clips of her reinforcing this by kind of leading up to, oh, Tonka is a sick chimp, he's had strokes before and he's real sick, real sick. And she says, God gave me an opportunity so I take advantage of it. And we devised a plan to say he died.

Yeah, we devised a plan to say he died. We had a plan and we just- We died a plan to say he devised a plan. Here's the ashes. So, if you stir it with water, it'll make chocolate milk. Just saying. And then we see this amazing montage of her lying that time because dad's like, well, hell I'm dead. I mean, he was in a state, he didn't move. I mean, he knew his time was limited. He was dead. He was dead. He was gone. He was gone.

And really the best thing about this, because we've seen all those scenes of her crying and her saying that he's dead and all this. The best part is watching the wigs just change with every quick. She has so many crazy wigs. It's just like Tonya lying in different wigs. Yeah. So then they start playing the cranberries, which I was like, this is a strange twist for this documentary. And she's like, well, I think before Peter came and took the chimps in after the film crew left, Jerry and I started our preparations to get tank sedated. So, you know, it took us till 3 a.m.

And, you know, we kept them throwing poop at us. And I was like, tank, come on tank, you gotta clean that up. And then we went ahead and we just went to the Holiday Inn. So they basically blow darted him and then put him in a crate. And they were like, okay, we finally got him a crate. We can finally be on the run. I'm tired. Let's go to the holiday inn. They got to, they went two miles away and they,

they paused to take a break and overnight break. I'm like, and they went to the holiday inn. Okay. So then we see the hotel footage. They got the footage. Yes, they got a second story room. And we see the footage from the hotel, like black and white grainy camera footage from the hallway of them dragging a huge trunk. Was no one in security concerned about this at all? Someone like, oh, well, there's more people pulling something up in the crate. I'm like,

you're in a sketchy ass motel and you're not freaked out're not freaked out by two people in the middle of the night bringing a giant heavy crate up your staircase. And she's like, well, he put him in the bathroom in case he peed. I mean, we're not going to trash the hotel. I mean, lie and keep a giant poop throwing shimp in there. Sure. But we're not going to trash it. I mean, come on, we've got some, we've got some lines we don't cross. We got some class here. And he goes, and then we, and then we drove straight to sides. Well, then we actually know we stopped over at Yogurtland in the morning and well, we weren't going to leave Tonk in the car. So it just cut to footage of them pushing a crate, a monkey crate into a Yogurtland. Tonk, you want some Yogurtland?

He's asleep. You want some cookies and cream? I think he's still asleep. This is good. This is Tonk. We're pretending Tonk is a tray at a golden corral We're just putting our plates right on top of tonk Pushing them right through the right through the line there. Here we are

We got about a quarter of a mile down the road from the holiday inn and is us pulling into the red lobster and we're just pushing restaurant to restaurant Cheddar buns, you know, you know, you may be on the run, but you need those cheddar biscuits. So we see them now driving to Cincinnati and their little baby monkey squealing in cage in the back of her vehicle because she's still like Tonka. She just hasn't learned her lesson. She's like, yeah, it's real sad about what's happened to Tonka. So, you know,

I'm just going to sell 90 more animals to people who don't really, don't know how to take care of them. It's all for the kids. You're fine. Booney, Booney, we're going to get you the size. All right. I'll change your diapers and feed you a bottle. Fix your wigs Booney. Booney's back there with like a little tiny curly blonde dress like Tanya wigs, dress like the mom from Bewitched. So-

I told you you could turn him into you. So now Tanya is in a grocery store with a shopping cart and she's like, well, you know, Cy is a chimp guy. I never met him. I just met him the day I dropped Tonka off and my best place was to pick somebody that had chimpanzees that could blend Tonka in and Sai was the perfect person because Sai had male chimpanzee, he had a male chimpanzee named Ricky and Ricky happened

to die of liver failure so no one would know that it's Tonka because everyone would think it's Ricky. You see what I'm saying there? It's like a little… You know it's so sad and I'm not really sure why all these chimps get liver failure. Hey, can I have another bottle of Jack with these ho ho's? And do you have any more of those ring things back there? I need something to give them to watch the other chicken nuggets. It's crazy. Does this jack puff come in a bigger container?

It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crap ens commercial Welcome to the offensive line you guys on this podcast We're gonna make some pics talk some shit and hopefully make you some money in the process I'm your host Annie a car. So here's how this show is gonna work Okay We're gonna run through the weekly slate of NFL and college football matchups breaking them down into very serious categories like No Offense. No offense, Travis Kelce, but you gotta step up your game if Pat Mahomes is saying the Chiefs need to have more fun this year.

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Follow the offensive line on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can access bonus episodes and listen ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus. What's up guys? It's your girl Kiki and my podcast is back with a new season and let me tell you, it's too good and I'm diving into the brains of entertainment's best and brightest. Okay? Every episode I bring on a friend. I mean the likes of Amy Poehler, Kel Mitchell, Vivica Fox, the list goes on. So follow, watch and listen to baby. This is Kiki Palmer on the W react or wherever you get your podcast So they are going to just blend him in right so then we see her at the McDonald's drive-thru

I mean she really is on a health food kick here and saying yeah, we're gonna have three chicken McNugget happy meals We want the extra friends. We need chocolate milk. What do you mean? You're out of the Hello Kitty toy? We mean you know, of the Hello Kitty toy? What do you mean? Every single one, how many people are in the Hello Kitty? Boonie, Boonie just threw a piece of poop in my face because she heard there's no more Hello Kitty. Lady, please, please. So then we now hear Sai's answering machine, which says, Hi, you've reached Sai at Union Ridge Wildlife Center.

We're all busy monkeying around. So please leave a message and someone will turn your call. People. So they go, I had to look this up. McDonald's hello kitty X UTO happy meal has left out a toy that was included in its international release and fans are not happy. Has your local McDonald run out of the hello kitty toys? I knew it. I knew this was the thing when I went to get fries Has your local McDonald's run out of the Hello Kitty toys? I knew it.

I knew this was the thing when I went to get fries at two different McDonald's on different days of course, and both of them were out of the Hello Kitty toys. I was like, this is probably causing a ruckus and according to the internet, it is. And in our next episode, we are going to get to the bottom of what happened to the Hello Kitty. I'm just kidding. It's a talk of the space man. But it's a thing. Donkey. We're free. We're free. Hello Kitty just I'm just kidding. It's a nice basement, but it's a thing Donkey we're free. We're free. He just threw some shit in my face

Yeah, okay kitty clean this up right here. Come on kitty So they go they infiltrate this place this is size We know size trouble we see Psy and Psy is wearing a bright orange jack-o'-lantern shirt. Nothing good ever comes out of people wearing jack-o'-lantern shirts. I'm telling you, nothing good. Yeah. People who like Halloween too much. He's got like the big- It's dangerous. I think he has like the big earring hole things in his ear that looked like they're like giant shoelace holes. And so he's there. And so then Eric is on the phone with Dwayne and Dwayne's like, well, she was just trying to figure out where to take Tonka to. And

then Connie Casey suggested Si. And listen, Si is not open to the public. He's a private collection. He has like some tigers. He's got other stuff. He's got chimps. And then we start seeing just all of the animals that he has. This guy is a pack rat, but of like living, like a living pack rat, a life life, life form pack rat. Everything but pack rats. So they're in there and Tonya is like outside, like the chimp, the chimp area and they're like, and she's like like I hear him

Yeah, they heard that i'm here. They know me. They know me We got a lot of hello kitty fans in there. Some of them are gonna be a little disappointed with the toys. I gotta say Yeah, and they are going crazy and she's like hey girls, you're my favorite girl. Give me a kiss. Give me What? No, I don't have the fucking hello kitty. What you're just a bunch of fucking users, right? No one's getting the Hello Kitty. All right. Everybody's screeching out right now. And Sai keeps on walking around like these, these chimps are going nuts. They are banging on, on the cages. They're screaming, they're jumping around and he keeps walking around going, shh, shh, shh. It's like, could you not condescend these animals?

That was funny. He's like, be quiet now. Be quiet. Be quiet. Wild animals. She's like, they look good. Si and he's like, this was an opportunity for me to do something for someone that I'd want done for me if I was in the same situation. Oh no, no, no, side. That's, that's not what I want to hear because you know, size ass will call you. You can be like, Hey, so I think so much for the ride. And a week later size, I I've kidnapped some chimps. Can I leave them at your house? But I gave

you a ride. So he's like, you know, I just like, um, you know, I'd seen some of my own friends in Ohio lose their animals because they weren't willing to, you know, adjust to new rules and regulations. And Tonka was here for at least six months and Tanya drove here regularly, even for just an evening. And she's saying, yeah, we have a connection between sign. I so it's perfect. So when we came to size, we were very careful. We'd always be doing transport somewhere else. So they would have to have followed us for many, many thousands of miles, which is like, by the way, Peta,

why did you not hire like a private detective? This seems like the easiest thing to trail someone to like if she's driving to like Ohio, is that not strange just Pay someone to trim. Well, we have to also remember that PETA is not the FBI You know what? I mean, like they're just some organization that's like trying to help the animals They're like, well file a lawsuit and follow through but I mean through a lot of this I'm like, why is Pete why has Peter not tapped her phones yet? How have they not found her? Don't they have fingerprint scanners anywhere? I mean, what is with the heat wave scanners? Am I right? Like, I read the news so much that I'm like, how have they not caught her? But they're really just, you know, like a charity organization. Pete Slauson Yeah, but they're like…

Pete Slauson They're not really supposed to be following them around. But I see what you're saying. I mean, it's like that Jared guy is like, we have done everything that we can. We have searched high and low. We will search deserts. We will search oceans. Now, we haven't looked into it. We're not going to do that. Yeah, we don't have to go. It's smelling. It's smelling in there. So it feels like PETA is trying to commission like 23 year olds who I've just graduated from school and don't,

I don't know what they're going to do with their lives and are like, Hey, can you go find the gym? But they're like, yeah, man, this is super cool. And they probably like look for like two hours every day and then they give up and do something else. Like, it's like throw some money at a real private investigator. I'm sorry, I'm just here to spray Kim Kardashian with paint, paint, spray paint.

Just give me that job. So, Cy, we find out about Cy while Tanya is feeding the monkeys their happy meals and saying, here's your sauce, and just throws a closed sauce. The monkey grabs the sauce and goes, yeah, honey mustard. And we learned about Cy and he tells us, the Union Ridge Wildlife Center provides sanctuary to animals that are being displaced. I'm looking into expanding with great apes. Here's our project." And he shows Tanya this huge project. It's basically like a hamster tube and it's hamster tubes going all over the place in rainbow colors. And he's like, I want it to look like a hamster cage, even painted these obnoxious colors. So he's going to build this giant cement, like hamster,

hamster cage for the apes to jump around in, but it's all cement. So it looks like a nuclear reactor. And, um, I don't know how he's going to get the money or the zoning approval to build the structure, but like, this is his dream. He says, well, he says, well, as we gain some creative funding sources, I was like, well, what does that mean? Some creative funding sources. And he goes, yeah, well, once we do it, we'll get 24 chimps in there. And she's like, that is amazing, Cy. And he's like, yeah, I really had to sell Tonya on trusting me because, you know, I've made choices that have really screwed that up in some people's minds. Just Google me. Sivyestra. I was a township fiscal officer. Oh my God, this fucking guy. And then they start flashing all of it, the shit that Sai

has done. And he tells us, I got hooked on buying random things off auction sites. And then when I ran out of money, I started spending township money. I always was going to put it back, but it got really out of control. And we see a list of stuff that he's stolen. He stole like, not stole, but bought off an auction site. He bought a snow cone machine and a wildebeest. What else did he buy on there? It was just like all sorts of random ass stuff. Like he was keeping eBay alive and he dipped into the town funds and basically he had to pay $340,000 or else, you know, go to jail for nine years. She goes, yeah, they're throwing the book at him per se.

Per se, I guess. So then they're just like playing back with the chimps. Like this is just like, oh yeah, he's just, you know, financial mismanagement, sort of low level criminal here. And now like size clipping nail, the chimps nails and everything. And Dwayne's like, you know, you're already in trouble with the law. So then you helped Tanya defy a court order.

Does that worry you? No. Great. I love that people's judgments are really in fine order here. He's like, look down at that snow globe you're eating, that snow cone you're eating, that was stolen. Are you scared?

Are you? Yeah, I just remember, if I hadn't stolen it from the rich, you wouldn't have had a snow cone right now. So you're welcome. So then we go to Jared Goodman, the PETA lawyer getting ready for an interview. And we cut back to Tonya and she's like, once I announced that Tonka passed Jared Goodman, a little fucker attorney of PETeta contacted me, one proof. So I was like, all right, I cremated him. I cremated him. And we see her holding the

Nesquik ashes. And then we cut to Jared and he's like, we knew that there was no real basis to believe Tanya. But frankly, you know, given her lies up until this point, it was remarkable that she expected anyone to believe this Now did we do anything to find Tonka? Not really. Well, we did everything. We climbed mountains We swam rivers. We went through oceans. We dug holes to the center of the earth Did you look in the windows of her house? No, we wouldn't look in the windows of her house. She is a disgusting human being. Well when she drove off in the middle of the night, did you follow her? Well, no, I mean, it's ridiculous.

I mean, she clearly was just going to the 7-Eleven. Why else would you go off in the middle of the night? So no, we didn't follow her at all. So then Tanya's basically like, well, we needed some ashes. So I'm like, okay, where am I gonna come up with these ashes? And then we see them standing over Ricky, the tombstone, and Sai's like, well, it was so important to me to help Tanya protect her relationship with Tonka. And then we see them standing over Ricky, the Chimp's tombstone. And Sai's like, well, it was so important to me to help Tanya protect her relationship with Tonka.

So I said, you know, I've got Ricky out here. So what better purpose for him to be part of this greater scheme of things? So they basically exhumed Ricky, the Chimp's bones. And he goes, and he was 80% decomposed. What the fuck? It was mostly there, mostly bones. And he goes, and he goes, now it was mostly just decomposed.

Mind you now, I had already removed his head, you know, cause I wanted to preserve his skull. Oh, well naturally. Naturally. He's like, yeah, you know, like obviously the head was gone anyway, so hope they're not looking for that. Yeah. Well, when I were home by the lake was ready, you know, when we were done building a tiny cage for Tonk, you know, we went to pick up Tonka and Rinky and so then we have a chimp body in the back of our truck and they scuged it going all the way from Ohio to Missouri. I mean, if they'd stopped for any reason, they would have thought, hey,

and they would have thought there was a human remain in there because they would have thought we killed someone. I'm like, yeah, and they also would have been like, why do you have a chimpanzee, a sedated chimpanzee in your trunk too? I know. It's like, yeah, like a Jeffrey Dahmer thing. And they're like, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I have questions. So those ashes were just cake mix, right? They weren't actually this other chimp. But it sounds like they actually did make chimp ashes. Cause there were no bones or anything in the ashes. So that's weird. And were they keeping

this chimp to like just bury in the backyard in case they got questioned more, they could say, well, we didn't actually cremate him. He's buried in the backyard. We just, I don't know, I'm so confused by this whole thing. So anyway, Tanya is now talking to Tonka through the cage, and she's like, oh God, this house is perfect. It's off the road. There's a rural area, no one bothers you, and he's so quiet. I mean, even though there's people here constantly, they had no clue there was a chimpanzee here. You know, people spent the night they had no clue there was a chimpanzee here. You know, people spent the night and didn't know there was a chimpanzee here.

Cut to everyone who stayed at Tanya's house. Did it sort of feel like there was a chimpanzee there? Yeah, it did. Oh, it's just Tanya's. It's just Tanya's house. So, so then we now cut to Tanya's son, Justin, Justin Range, and he's son, Justin, Justin Range, and he's like, yeah, she even kept it from me. He basically is like, yeah, I didn't even know.

And then one day he's like, I came downstairs and was like, holy crap. He's like, yeah, it's really stressful. You have to really watch your Ps and Qs when you start talking to people because in all intents and purposes, he's like a fugitive. It's like walking on eggshells, man. Like, one while it's worthy cause for this boy, like God, it scares me.

I'm just afraid that she might, you know, get too caught up in this and not worry about herself because that's how she's been her whole life. I'm like, oh, I would also be worried her face may get ripped off. Yeah. And it's an interesting way to look at it because this whole thing is kind of her just worried about herself, right? Yeah. interesting way to look at it because this whole thing is kind of her just worried about herself, right? It's kind of masked under this, I'm doing it for the chimp, but it's like ultimately a selfish thing that she's doing. And she's like, yeah, I think God has plans for everything and I think mine was to be a caregiver. I was like, well, maybe try your son first. I don't know. So then we see some footage of Chania's wedding. And she's like, I got married when I was young. And it's like flashback to Chania. It's like, whoa,

what the hell's going on here? And we don't really see her husband's face, but she's like, I got married when I was young and my husband was quite a bit older than I was. And yeah, I didn't believe in women working. So like, oh my God, this poor kid. Yeah. And so we see, we see that she became like, like her husband allowed her to become a foster parent. And so then she wind up at 19 years old, she was a foster parent, which is feels really young to be a foster parent. And she wound up having 75 foster kids over the years. And, um,

she, then she had actually, she wound up getting a foster daughter who had fetal alcohol syndrome. And she's like, yeah, the doctor's like, you sure you wanna take this on? Cause she'll probably never be a productive citizen. I think you gave me that baby. Why would I change that now? So she took over.

She, then she actually had a biological son. So she was constantly like taking care of helpless children, essentially. Yeah. Uh, yeah, she may have fetal alcohol center, but from now on, she's only gonna have chicken nugget alcohol center because she's getting, get a lot of chicken nuggets. I love chicken. Get over it. I'm going to love you with chicken nuggets. She's actually like such a good lady, you know? This whole thing is confusing, I guess. It's just so not easy to paint a villain. I mean, I know I keep saying that through the whole thing, but I'm like, wow, because I feel like it should be so easy to not like this person or just judge her and be like, you suck, you're doing the wrong thing. And it gets easier by the end of this episode. But at this point, I'm just like,

that's a good, that's a good lady. I love you. Well, she's sweet to animals. She's very sweet to them. But again, she doesn't, she is really putting her needs and her wants above what the animal needs. And she's warped her narrative and her reality into thinking like, no, like an animal sanctuary will not give Tonka what he needs. I'm the only one who can say what he needs. And she's making these medical assessments based off of no experience whatsoever. She's just saying, Oh, he has, you know, congenital heart failure or congestive congenital, I think. And, uh,

she just sort of saying these things and she talks about a vet that we never hear from or see or whatever. I don't know. Like she's not- No, I know. I get it. But it is a very conflicting depiction of a person. So Justin is talking about his childhood and he's like, oh, well, no, first she talks about raising her kids. So, she had all these foster kids. She ended up adopting her daughter and then had her biological son. And she says, you know, the two kids were the most important thing for so many years. And then, you know, they started doing their own things. They started, you know, getting involved in soccer, walking, you know, they started walking so

they were able to just like get up and walk away from me. That was something. They started talking and saying, bye mom, and going out the front door. I wasn't going to have that anymore. So, you know, I definitely felt like, you know, I'm alone. And so then it cuts to Justin and he's like, yeah, I remember the time she picked me up from school and I noticed little premature diapers in the back and I said, am I having a brother or sister? And she said, yeah, kinda. And then life just started revolving around monkeys, you know? Like if I had a school function or whatever, she just wouldn't come because she had to

take care of the monkeys. So that wasn't great, you know? I mean, did I feel abandoned? I mean, no, but like, where do I fit into the picture, you know? You're out of it, kid. Come on, make room for Tank. So...

I mean, the kid's so sad and he's so sweet and supportive of his mom that he's like, I just understand that's how she is and I try not to take it personally. But you can see that it really hurts him because he even is kind of like making himself look like a champ in a way. Like he's growing his facial hair, like on this part of his face only like to look like Curious George a little bit. He looks like a little baby Donkey Kong. I love him. I just want to hug him. It's just like trying

to make himself good for his mom. He's like eating a banana. He's like, I don't mind. My mom doesn't have to pay any attention to me. Ah, ah, ah, ah, you so pooping me a little fucker. And he's basically saying, I get in trouble. He's basically saying like, yeah, she literally said, I care about these monkeys more than I care about my kids. And he's like, wow, that like, really it's like, it hurts. But you know, she's all he's also like, you know, my mom just feels like no one needs her and like she needs to feel needed. And the monkeys are basically,

they're like children that just never grow up. So they always need her care no matter what. And, um, you know, he basically is ultimately supportive. He's like reluctantly supportive of his mother and he sort of has empathy that she has this deep need to be needed. Um, which has, you know, very sad, very, very sad that like, we all want to be needed, I think, but like, maybe we, we're okay if we're not needed by a chimpanzee. Well, they do grow up, right?

That's the irony is that they, she thinks like they're, they're kids that never grew up. And she says that in this a couple of times, like, they're like kids, but they never grow up, but they do grow up. They just can't tell you, let me the fuck out of these chains. You know what I mean? Like your son was just actually able to pick the lock a little bit better.

Like we're slightly more evolved. Isn't it? So, um. Funny also just thinking back, I wonder was, has this been brought up on the documentary, but isn't it funny, you know, Michael Jackson famously had a chimpanzee named bubbles. Was it bubbles? Right. And like, you know,

Michael Jackson like a big part of his persona was that he, he wanted to stay like in a state of childlike wonderment. He himself did not want to grow up. He wanted, he had Neverland ranch. He is, you know, invited lots of kids over for, you know, whatever reasons, but his whole thing was he just liked to be a, he wanted to be a kid. He wants to stay a kid forever. And it is kind of funny this, this correlation between these chimps and like permanent childhoodness, right? And like this, this weird need and desire for that, that is somehow draws attention to chimps.

And I'd be, I hope that documentary actually, well, it doesn't have to get into it, but like, it would be interesting to see the dynamic, like exploring that dynamic with Michael Jackson. Okay, I'm getting off topic now, but the point is chimps, kids, it's crazy. Well, his chimp bubbles ended up at the center for Great Apes in 2005, and he's 41 years old and he's had a lot of freedom at the sanctuary. See? So there you go. So he's okay.

Yeah, he's okay. But yeah, there is something about it, like we talked about with Joe, what's his buns, who is crazy from Tiger King. There's something about people obsessed with Botox and face, like facial procedures and just general narcissistic ways that love to animal hoard. It's like refusing to acknowledge the passing of time or like fighting against time and aging and things changing and moving on to different stages of life almost. aging and things changing and moving on to different stages of life almost.

Yeah. I'm Dan Tbersky. In 2011, something strange began to happen at the high school in Leroy, New York. I was like at my locker and she came up to me and she was like stuttering super bad. I'm like, stop f***ing around. She's like, I can't. A mystery illness, bizarre symptoms and spreading fast. It's like doubling and tripling and it's all these girls. With a diagnosis the state tried to keep on the down low. Everybody thought I was holding something back. Well you were holding something back intentionally.

Yeah, yeah, well, yeah. No, it's hysteria, it's all in your head. It's not physical. You're, oh my gosh, you're exaggerating. Is this the largest mass hysteria since the witches of Salem? Or is it something else entirely? Something's wrong here. Something's not right.

Leroy was the new dateline and everyone was trying to solve the murder. A new limited series from Wondery and Pineapple Street Studios. Hysterical. Follow Hysterical on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Hysterical early and ad free right now by joining Wondery Plus. So then we go to Brittany. So Brittany, so this is the other PETA lady. Brittany is talking about how she's saying this is the culture, she's explaining the people who own the chimps. She's saying there is a culture of almost entirely women

who raise chimpanzees and monkeys as if they're babies, and they have to create a myth that this animal is my son, he's part of my family, but this is a fantasy and it inevitably ends in tragedy. And that was the case with Buck in Pendleton. So then we get back to this awful story. And I feel for Brittany because Brittany is just like the harbinger of doom. They're like, you know what, we have bad news, send Brittany in. And Brittany shows up and she's like, I'm sad face Brittany. I'm going to ruin your fucking life. Give Jared a break. Jared's for happy things, okay? I'm gonna ruin your fucking life.

Jared's not available. He is looking high and low for Tonka. He is apparently checking every single airport in the nation. Has he checked Tonka's house? No, no, no, no, no. But he's gonna look everywhere else. Okay, so can we send in-

Get off my ass, Brittany. Can we send in a young Mimi Rogers to talk to the camera? Okay. Someone's in and Brittany, they want a young Mimi Rogers. Okay, great. She does have that kind of Mimi Rogers always has bad news to tell you kind of a face. of Buck. So she is telling it, Jamie, and basically this is a Oregon place, Pendleton, Oregon. Who was I talking about? Brittany, I was talking about. So we meet Jamie. So Jamie is this chick with a bunch of tattoos and she's the narrator of this next section. So she is like, yeah, Pendleton's a Western town and we pride ourselves on being rural Oregon. We're conservative, but we're also tight knit and everyone here knows everybody.

But I never knew about Buck until the day Tamara Brigotti walked into my store with a chimp on her back. Dun, dun, dun. Yeah, everyone look, this is my little scrapbook. It's a little conservative scrapbook, but it's a tight knit scrapbook. And over the years, I kind of collected a handful conservative scrapbook, but it's a tight-knit scrapbook and over the years

I kind of collected a handful of pictures. Look, that's me and my buddy. Hey, that's me shotgunning a slurpee at 7-eleven Oh, hey, look, that's me. That's that's buck on my backpack. Now. There's bucks shotgunning us some slurpee We had a lot of fun a lot of fun my little fella So this basic thing is this lady's camera, who I love this camera, this evil woman in town named Tamara had this chimp and she started taking it around and everybody in town loves the chimp and you see pictures of everybody basically it's like the guy at the pet boys taking a picture with the chimp you know the lady selling frosty's at the Wendy's taking a picture with the chimp you know guy unclogging a toilet taking a picture with the chimp. You know, guy unclogging a toilet, taking a picture with the chimp. Like everybody felt like it was their lucky

day if they got to meet the chimp. And then we meet, is it Robert? So Robert is her, wait, who's her son? I'm skipping around a little bit here. Well, we meet a bunch of people. And I also don't know why we meet so many people for this story, but we do. We meet a guy named Tandy, um, who was, uh, he worked at Domino's, I guess. And he's like, I never delivered to a chimp ever before, but when I got here, he would take my hands and we'd jump up and down. He loved the pizza. Like, you can put that on your Tinder profile. And then, uh,

one guy's like, we, we go down to the tavern and Tamra bring Buck down to eat with them real well mannered at the dinner table. And then this real well mannered on Tamra was friends with my mom and she encouraged me to come over. It was good for Buck. He needed to socialize. So when I was coming up the driveway, he would jump in my arms and he would just be shaken, shaken while he hug me. God, he loved to hug me. And then they're like, wow, this monkey was so great. Everybody loved him.

And then Jamie's like, yep, Tamara Bergotti. She was a regular at the liquor store. I'll tell you that. Tamara's or Zabrati didn't, she didn't just walk in and buy a fifth of booze. We got six half gallons and we put them in a box for her. That was a lonely woman. Her husband died. She'd pass and she'd take his clothes and put them on buck. Oh my God. So that's like the saddest shit I've ever heard. Oh my God.

Now we meet the son, Beau. He's like, I love my mother with all my heart, but she is one tough, mean, old, old lady. And that's what I got to say about her. And that's about it. Okay. Roll film. So this is so sad. This guy is just a wreck. He's still traumatized from all of this. He's clearly like drunk and crying at the same time, you know, through this whole thing. This is terrible. So basically, he talks about this animal. He loved this animal. He says, a lot of these chimps are ugly as sin, but this one is so handsome. He was the Tom Brady of chimpanzees. We see pictures of him and

he is so cute. And he talks about how his mom really loved this chimp and how you would even sleep with her, is like her little teddy bear. And he tells us that she was obsessed with being the first lady who ever raised the chimp like a little human, like it was part of her family. Right, and then we go back to Jamie, and she's basically saying that like, that Tamra was not qualified in any way to be doing this. And she said that Tamra was not qualified in any way to be doing this. And she said that Tamara

wasn't really regarding his safety or his wellbeing or anything. And she always knew that Buck was never going to be completely safe in Tamara's care. So now we go back to Tanya's life. Andanya is now like playing with Tonka downstairs and Justin's like, yeah, my mom just cares about this animal. I think there's a bond. I think she's saved him and he saved her honestly. And she also saved him a bunch of chicken McNuggets. So that's nice too. It keeps the local McDonald's in business. Oh gosh. So then we cut back to Justin and Tanya a little bit. And he's, Justin's saying, you know, my mom just worries that Tonka is going to be hurt at this PETA facility and the other chimps will kill him. And he's just too passive for all of this. And Tanya is like, yeah, I mean,

he's not going to fight, you know, he's just, he's like a human. He doesn't know how to fight. And he doesn't want to fight. He just admits. So, you know, even at size, he got his butt kicked. You know, he's at one time he had over 360 sutures. And so, yeah, they're just talking about how, you know, oh, he's just so docile. He has not a mean bone in his body. But I guess I have a question as like, you know, an attorney on this case, then why were you letting him in with other chimps there? Yeah.

Like, why was that? Why is it okay to do it there, but not with like an approved place? I just honestly, I just keep thinking of that footage they had at the end of the Chimp Sanctuary with that big, beautiful, big, beautiful open land with a, with a moat around it. I was like, great, let Tom could go there. It just looks so nice. It looks like Chimp Paradise. Yeah. They were really showing it. Yeah, but they were

making that like the second life. Like, I'm a non hominidon. I'm like, is this from the opening of the cartoon? Because they were really making it look very heavenly. I wonder if it really is that. Yeah. So Tanya's like, you know, my biggest fear is this kid and my kid. I mean, chimpanzee. I mean, it's not me. And everybody's like, well,, my biggest fear is this kid and my kid I'm in chimpanzee. I mean, it's not me and everybody's like, well, I'm worried about you. Well, I'm not worried about me. They can throw me in jail for a year.

I don't care. I'm not obligated to anyone except this kid right here. And you know, her son was like, thanks, mom. I've been waiting so long to hear that. Not you, Dumbo. Talk about time. that. Not you, Dumbo. So then we cut to Dwayne and he is doing clown duty at a child's birthday party. And he's like, Happy birthday. He's just

juggling in the kids face. Yeah. And the kids like giving no reaction. Just like juggling in their face. Like, okay, now I will juggle bowling pin. What about that? They're like, do not care. Do not care about your fucking juggling. You fucking loser. Have you ever seen a clown at a party where kids are like, oh my God, this is amazing? I've never seen it. I've only seen kids looking bored and or horrified. I've never seen anyone enjoy a clown ever in the history of clowns. So, Dwayne, like... I feel like clowns don't even enjoy clowns. Like, I've seen clowns hanging out like in a food court, and I've never seen them

enjoying each other either. They all look fucking miserable to be around each other too. What are clowns for? Who are you for? I always thought there were all that makeup on their face. I couldn't stand it. I didn't want to be near them. They didn't scare me. I just always, I'm like, I don't, it's just, it's unpleasant. So hyperactive. So, um, then he's clown, literally clowning. He he's at a child's birthday party and then his cell phone rings and then all of a sudden we hear, hi, this is Michael Weinstein just returning your

call about your friend. So he has to step away from entertaining the children to speak to his lawyer. And so Dwayne is like, yeah, so I'm just walking, I have a hypothetical about my friend with the potential monkey in her basement. And he's like, well, so if she made repeated misrepresentations and false statements, she has a buffet of problems. You like that? I thought about that for a while. I was like, Cynthia, what's a good word I should use? Cause I know it's gonna be on camera. Do you think buffet? We like buffet. Okay, we can go with buffet. So she has a buffet. I almost want my smorgasbord. I'm not going to lie. Should I say it? I'll take it from the top. She has a smorgasbord of problems.

Does that sound good? Now listen, here's your friend's options. She can either give the fucking monkey up, right? And apologize and say, listen, I was worried for the monkey. I'm giving it up now. She could do that. Or she could say, fuck you and run. Okay. She could do that. Or she could just kill the monkey. Cause right now there's no problem. Cause there's no monkey. So if she just kills a monkey, put them down. Then guess what? You've got a charcuterie of non-problems. Okay. You've got so many non-problems to put on so many non-crackers, you know? Cynthia really wanted me to do the charcuterie one. I said, it's not really going to work.

It's not going to land, but she's like, do it, try it out. So I did it. I did it because I'm a good husband. Listen, I'm offering you basically a pigs in a blanket of options here. All right. So pigs in a blanket tray, which are you going to choose? Let me tell you, they're all the same thing. They're a hot dog wrapped in dough.

Okay. Either way, you're kind of fucked at this point, clown. Okay. You know know what it's like how bad and how ugly of a car wreck is this going to be for her? And then how many of your buffet shapers are going to get ruined? So, and the amount of clusterfuck that is clown car wrecks, how bad is this clown car wreck going to be? How car wrecky is this clown car wreck going to be? So yeah, it's not looking good. And when he said, yeah, she can just like get rid of the monkey, just kill him, I was like, what the fuck? What kind of thing is that to say? Dun, dun, dun, spoiler alert. So then we see- Jared.

Tanya in the room. Oh, sorry. Oh, no, sorry. We're with Jared, yeah. We see Jared speaking voiceover and he's like, wow, PETA has been exhausting a lot of resources to find Tonka. Okay. And after the beginning of 2022, we put up a $10,000 reward and Brittany's like, if Tonka is alive and still stashed somewhere, there are people that know it and $10,000 is significant. All right. You're really depressing us. Can we get someone more excited than Brittany? I want

people to be motivated to go looking. I don't need everybody in the fetal position crying. Sorry, Jared. You know what? Sorry, it's not good enough, Brittany. Go to your room. Sorry, Jared. I'll be in my room. Yeah. So, you know, $10,000, we feel like that's a really big reward for everyone. In fact, we wanna sweeten the deal and we've added some Groupons for Borders Bookstore. So if you can find one, congrats, you're in luck.

You're gonna get some free books and maybe some coffees out of it. So I don't know everyone, if I were you, I'd be looking for this monkey. We've got a lot of odd ducks in this town. So we're gonna give $10,000 of Borders skip certificate and a few of Tanya's wigs. Okay. Get anybody involved in drag queen play that relates to toddlers and TR is involved in

this. Okay. Those drag queens will find it. We have an old six pack of Crystal Pepsi. Some people might like that as a, just a keepsake little want to build a collection, maybe start your own museum about soft drinks of the past. So we got that and maybe a box of McPizza from McDonald's. Just saying we want, we have a lot to offer you guys. So, Brittany's like, people who own exotic animals know that we're a threat to them,

because we know their secrets. And Justin's like, yeah, I mean, it's scary. One of these days someone could come banging on our door asking for the monkey and Tony's like, yeah, they're sending vigilantes out. Vigilantes to steal our monkey. You are the vigilante. Give your damn monkey up. I like Brittany saying, people who own exotic animals know that we're a threat to them and we know their secrets, except the very obvious places they may be stashing their exotic animals. God, where could it be? So then we cut back to Jamie, Buck's former nanny, and she's getting a tattoo. Gee, I guess what the tattoo is. Sorry, I sneeze. I guess what the tattoo is. What? I don't think we see it yet. Okay, so then Jamie's like, this doesn't get easier as long as we, the older I get,

it still doesn't get easier. And she's like, I took care of Buck for seven years and it started just being buddies, but then I became sort of his nanny. And one of my favorite moments, God, I will never forget this, I gave him chewing gum. I mean, he was just so happy. And then we, I put him in a bath one time and he wore shoes. I said, what are you crazy? You gum chewing shoe wearing bath taker. And then I realized that actually just giving the gum and the shoes to Tamra. It was a huge

mistake. But by the way, I feel like it's not safe to give chewing gum to a chimp. Like they don't know. I think we're beyond that at this point. They not, I don't know what the chimp knows about how swallowing gum could be so dangerous. I'll tell you what, he, I hope he doesn't have caps on his teeth because he was really like, yeah. And I was like, that's gonna, that could cost a thousand dollars. You know, that's what I was thinking. I was like, you know, these chimps are obviously not at middle age yet. They're not worrying about the important things. So then we go back to Tamara's friend, Robert, and he is on the phone with Tamara. And Robert's like,

Tamara, you do not want to be involved in getting Buck's story out? Oh, this is Tamara, the kind of evil old lady, Buck's mom. So this guy's like, do you not want to get involved in telling Buck's story? Because it's going to get told Tamra. And if you're not part of it, and she's like, Nobody better tell that story. And they're dead. See it clear. Keep your head down. Anything like that going on. I'm gonna take food out of their children's mouth. I'll leave them homeless. And then I'll get angry. I'll get angry. I was like, God damn, Tamara's evil no matter what show you put her on. Yeah. So then, you know, Jamie's talking about how Tamara wanted to build like this enclosure and she was going to build all this stuff to benefit Buck's life.

And there was photos of her on like bulldozers and stuff, you know, and she was just trying, she was going through the motions to make it look like she was doing stuff for Buck, but she wasn't. And then Bo's son was just saying how like basically Buck was sad. He wasn't in the jungle. He wasn't climbing trees or eating fruit or meeting ladies or getting into fights. He just was a sad, sad chimp. And then Tamra eventually Tamra then went and had Buck castrated and then started wearing like putting like a padlocks around his neck because he's obviously too big and too strong and too dangerous to keep around. So we're just like, oh, just you get to hang out around the house. Like now you start to have to contain the animal and like never does she think, oh, maybe it's time for me to move back on to a place that would, you know, is more equipped to take care of him.

to take care of him. Yeah, this, I mean, this gets so sad. So basically this guy is just miserable, this fucking guy. Every time they cut to him talking about his mom, he's just got so much devastation about his mom and how he was raised and all that. It's so sad. And then we find out that basically Peta hears about this animal and that she's having problems and she can't take care of it. So they're like, we need to visit, we're going to get this animal basically. And Tanya calls, or Tamara calls them freaking out and is like, listen, I'm worried. Why don't you guys just come check it out and you'll see that it's safe. So she makes a date, but then she cancels the date with PETA and she keeps changing the date to try and push them off so that they can't come see the animal. But, um, you know, obviously it's Peta. They're not going to back down.

I mean, unless she puts Buck somewhere very close, puts Buck in a very obvious place. So then now we go back to Sonia and she's showing to, uh, Tonka, um, Instagram and say, Hey, you like this? You like this? You want to see footage of, Hey, look, look at all these chimps that are roaming around free. Here's some, Oh, look, here's a chimp playing outside. Here's another chimp playing outside. That looks, that looks good. Huh? Tonk, you like that? Tonk, here's another one. You like that? Tonk. And you just see Tonka.

Oh God. Here's a lady throwing a tire across the street. Tonk, did you press swipe up on a CrossFit? Oh God, now here's a lady lifting an iron bar above her head and dropping it and screaming, hoo-wah. God Tonk, I told you, don't swipe on CrossFit things anymore. I can't handle it. Pete Slauson Great. Now it's in the algorithm. Oh God. Tonk God, got monkeys in CrossFit. God damn it. Pete Slauson Then we go back to Alan Cummings and he's like, well, if Tonya still has Tonka, if Tonka's alive and she's hiding him,

then she's trapped. What can she do? She's got this chimp. She really can't take him out and go for walks. Everyone will see her. If that is happening, then she must know what a dangerous thing it is for her. So people are still observing. People are eventually going to find out.

You know, I've never met Tonya until she's a woman who's wronged, and spurned, and furious at her love being wrenched from her, being mad there, if you will. And I have great empathy for that, for that feeling. And I love that team so much. I have a special, special bond. So I understand that she has that. I just, you know, I feel like I truly understand how you behave crazily for what you consider to be your family. So he's going to put up another 10 grand to match Peta's 10 grand. So now it's 20 grand. So then Eric is still hand wringing over like, what do I do about Tonka? He's a filmmaker. And he's like, it's important for me not to overreach into the story, but you know, like, I don't know,

the viewers need to come to their own conclusion, right? So then he's asking for advice from Peter. Pete I'm doing the right thing. Jared And he's asking for his friend, his journalist friend's advice, Peter. And he's like, but you know, we never thought in our wildest imaginations we were going to be in this situation. Do we turn her in? Do we follow the story? What would you do? And he's like, those journalists, we don't want to do something that's morally, ethically wrong. But we're looking at how we can act to get the story in. You have to hope that, fuck it, we're journalists. I mean, what the hell? Do whatever you need to do. Beat a baby. Get the story. Come on. What are you joking? You've already got 30 hours of this woman in

a nail salon getting her lips filled at the Pet Boys. I mean, you can't let that go, man. Get it out there no matter how. I mean, is there a greater good? Well, we think there might be a chimp network. That's good enough. That works. You're good. You're safe. So now Tanya is still scrolling on Instagram and she's looking at, she's like looking at something. It's, oh yeah. And Keely, guess what Keely said? She says, I'm yours, PETA. God, I love Keely. So good. Oh, the cover right here, variety magazine, this little bastard. look at this article, it's all bullshit.

It's Jared. It's Jared here. You know what they used to say? Little pipsqueak fuck face of the year. That's what he used to say. There's what we need from you, Variety. All right, this little bastard, look at this article, it's all bullshit. He doesn't care about Tonka because that movie was done, this Alan Cumming idiot, that

movie was done in 1997. He didn't even know anything about Chanka. He never offered to come visit. He never bought him any presents. You know what? I'll tell you one thing that Alan Cummings never did. He never threw some honey mustard in a packet at Chanka's face. I'll tell you that. You think I believe that story and then he thought that Tonka was in Palm Springs on a gay branch somewhere retiring bullshit He didn't care at all about Tonka. So then he's just being paid by pay it P that act like he cares So so that's it, you know that they said who can we get to change hearts and minds all over America? a guy from a movie in 1997

You know Peter surely that'll do it give him $100. Let's see where this goes. Dwayne. It's Tanya here calling you. Okay. You know, Peter's out to destroy me. I have pissed them off to the highest extent that you could even piss them off. Okay. They were literally sent a hit man after me. I swear to God, if they thought they could get by with it. So Dwayne's like, yep, I mean, you're under a lot of pressure as $20,000. I mean, 20,000 half of it's from Alan Cummings. That is amazing. I was about to tell the clowns about that. But God, they get violent. They get real, real

violent. I mean, I don't even know if they care about the money. But Alan Cummings, he was one of the greatest MCs of all time. Oh, it's really bad. I mean, now it's viral and now, you know, $20,000 you don't know who to trust. You don't even sleep at night and you wonder is someone gonna knock at the door? People gonna drive up to my driveway

just cause they could get a glimpse of the chimp. You know, it's scary. I almost feel like I'm the victim here. You know, you hear a lot of people say, well, my grandparents mostly, but they would always say people don't want to work anymore. They just don't. I always thought that's such bullshit. People literally do not want to work anymore. There's $20,000 on the table for

finding a chimp. All you have to do is look in the phone book to see where this lady lives. No one can even come up to her door and look in the window. Well, I guess it's in the basement, but still it's $20,000. How lazy are we people? Yeah, just show up in a wig and be like, I'm so sad. I need to be needed. I wish I had the love that a chimp could give me. Oh, come on downstairs. I want to show you Tonk. Hey, listen, I've got some free wrestling. It's only going in in a basement. All right, come on down. Ah, whoops, there's Tonk. There's Tonky B. So she's like, let me ask you, Mr. T. Okay, so she's crying in her car, right? So she's talking to Duane still. And she's like, all right, let me ask you something. You know, Mr. T, Tonky B, he's in congestive heart failure,

real bad. I mean, I've said it a lot of times. Maybe the more I say it, the more you'll believe it, right? So the vet wanted me to put him down the other day, but I couldn't. So he made an appointment for the 2nd of June because he don't think I'm being fair to Tonka letting him live like this when he don't feel good. You know? So I mean, I don't know if you'd want to be around then, you know, cause that's like kind of the end of a legacy. Wait, so you're going to put him down and now you want people to film it? This lady. So then I'll Eric.

I'm trying here, Tonya, but you're killing me. Now this part shocked me. So now Eric and Dwayne are talking and Eric is like, she's killing the chimp. And Dwayne's like, yeah, she's going to euthanize it. And Eric's like, is the chimp in a really bad shape? And Dwayne's like, well, again, let me just remind you, I am a clown. And so I don't have a professional assessment on this, but like, yeah, it looks like the chimp's not doing so well, but that might also be because the chimp is confined to a tiny cage in a basement and isn't in its natural habitat

and needs like could probably feel a lot better if it was outside and eating better food. And Eric's like says she would really kill the chimp just to make her problems worse. And he's like, well, if there's not neither chimp, there's not a problem, right? And that's like, Tonya finally got that, you know? So Eric's like, do you think this sounds awfully similar to the chimp in Pendleton? And he's like, yeah.

So then we cut back to the other story that is so sad. And Bo's like, you know, I don't know a lot about PETA, but they do like to take animals from people. And my mom just said, fuck you, I'm going to do this to the end. So he tells this story about how she wanted him to move up to help take care of the monkey. And he was like, oh, hell no. So she got her daughter to move in with her to take care of this animal for a while. And they had a thing that they would get every morning they would go have their coffee together. And they had a thing that they would get every morning, they would go have their coffee together. And there was this way that they would lock the doors every

single morning. Well, one morning they didn't lock the door properly. And before you knew it, the chimp attacked the daughter. Yeah. And like, it was like a big bloody fight and like the chimp like bit out parts of like her leg and stuff like that. So then 911 gets dispatched. 911 comes in, we see the body cam footage. They have to, you know, they shoot Buck and then they are taking the daughter, but she's alive. The daughter is actually alive, but it's wild. And thankfully they blur everything out.

We don't actually see the monkey getting killed. We don't see, they blur out the daughter who's like just in like, thank God. I mean, they did blur out enough that, you know, we're still like horrified by this whole thing because there was body cam footage and stuff. But, uh, we also hear her on the phone with them. She's really calm and she's telling them he's gone. Basically he's gone haywire. And you have to shoot him in the head. That's the only way to get him down.

Shoot him in the head, shoot him in the head, shoot him in that over and over and over. I mean, it is just, it's painful. Yeah, it's wild. So then, so we come back and Jamie is saying that he thinks that Buck is a victim of circumstances. And he says that like, he's a victim of humans. You know, and he's just like, really, you know, like, or I'm sorry, Jamie is the nanny. But either way, everyone's just like, yeah, this was a fucked up situation. So now we're back with Eric and he is driving and he's on the phone and he's speaking to what we find out is PETA. And

he's like, we've got some really important information we need to talk to you about because out is PETA. And he's like, we've got some really important information we need to talk to you about because it has echoes similar to Buck and Tamara and Pendleton. And we don't want that outcome. So then they sit down and they meet with Jared. They sit down in Jared's office and they basically show Jared footage. They play audio of Tanya and Dwayne's conversation about congestive heart failure, etc., euthanasia. And basically, Jared is like, oh, basement. I never really thought about that, looking in our basement. That is a pretty impressive idea. Yeah.

But remember when I told you to look in the basement, get the fuck out of here, Brittany. Okay, sorry, Jared. Sorry. And then as this ends, we find out that the twist at the end of this episode is that now the documentary crew has basically turned state's evidence on Tanya. And so now this whole thing is going to be how to bring down Tanya, which is crazy. Oh my God, what, you know, sorry, not the funniest like recap in the world, but this show really is incredible to watch. I mean, it's got me glued to the TV. It has me laughing really, the silly, like that guy's size stealing from the township to buy a snow cone machine, died laughing. And then the other parts are just so sad and it really does have so many twists and turns in it. It's really, really well done. I'm really enjoying it. But sorry for, you know, not a ton of laughs, but what can

you do with this? I mean, my God. It's a show. So anyway, everyone, thank you so much for- It's a thing. It's a thing that's happening. People are talking about it. So everyone, thank you so much for being here and next week we'll have the thrilling conclusion, part 4 of this wild documentary and we will catch you on the next one. Bye everyone! Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee She don't miss no trickless. Strolling the park with Caitlin Clark. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniela. Itchels!

Erin McNicholas. She don't miss no trickles. She's never scary, it's the green fairy. Jamie. She has no last name-y. Hava Nagila Webber. Know your worth with Jason Kurtz. Sip some scotch with Jessica Trotch.

She's always supplying, it's Kelly Ryan. Kristen the Piston Anderson. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino. We wanna hang with Liz Lang. Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the Berg. The Bay Area Betches, Betches. And our super premium sponsors.

Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy MD. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Kaitlyn O'Neal. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily sides. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. We got our wish, it's Jen Plish. She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch.

She's a little bit loony. Junie. My favorite Murdo. Karen McMurdo. We love him madly, it's Kyle Pod Shadley. Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender, the incredible, edible Matthews sisters. Give him hell, Miss Noelle.

Ring that bell to a Rochelle. She's the queen bee, it's Sarah Lemke. Shannon out of a cannon, Anthony. Let's take off with Tam La Plaine. She ain't no shrinkin' violet Coutar. We love you guys. If you like Watch What Crappens, you can listen ad-free right now

by joining Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. She struck him with her motor vehicle. She had been under the influence that she left him there. In January, 2022, local woman Karen Reed was implicated

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This was clearly an intentional act. And his cause of death was blunt force trauma with hypothermia. Or a corrupt police cover-up. If you believe the defense theory, however, this was all a cover-up to prevent one of their own from going down. Everyone had an opinion. And after the 10-week trial, the jury could not come to a unanimous decision. To end in a mistrial, it's just a confirmation of just how complicated this case is. Law and Crime presents the most in-depth analysis to date of the sensational case

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