Watch What Crappens - #2553 RHODub S02E14: VVIPeeved

Episode Date: September 11, 2024

On Part 1 of the Real Housewives of Dubai reunion, Taleen and Brooks fight about vagina-gate.  Plus, there’s frostiness between Lesa and Ayan as they continue to feud.  To watch this recap on video and listen to all of our bonus episodes, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondry Plus subscribers can listen to Watch Your Crappins ad free right now. Join Wondry Plus in the Wondry app or on Apple Podcasts. What's What Crap-Ins? Oh well you know what's what crap-ins Who cares what happens when there's so much that crap-ins Hello and welcome to What's What Crap-Ins? A podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker. Joining me today is just the beautiful and glamorous D.Va himself, Ronnie Karam. Hi Ronnie, how are you? Well what a way to say hello y'all.

Hi, you're wearing some crappens blue today. It's almost like you're a floating head in our crappens on demand. Really? Yeah. It's actually kind of a green, but I guess it does go with the kind of off blue in our background on crappens on demand.

I mean, who knows? Who knows? I'm wearing the UKRP in Cincinnati t-shirt that someone once gave me when we went to Cincinnati for our Q, which is really fun. Um, some really interesting stuff to talk about today. We're talking about real housewives of Dubai. Um, first of all, I also have a small announcement next week. Obviously Salt Lake City comes back and guess what? If you've been wondering what our recaps have been like for the first four seasons of Salt Lake City, guess what? They're all up on our site now. We have doubled the size of our back catalog archives on the website.

We now have Salt Lake City up. We have Potomac up, we have Vanderpump rules up. And I, oh, ladies of London is up in case you're really feeling Caroline Stanbury. And I think I put one other one up. I don't remember, but go check it out. There's all sorts of, there's, there's, I think nine shows that are archived and up on the website. Now that's at watch what happens.com. That's where you can listen to all the back catalogs. You can listen to all our shows organized, all our recaps organized by show and by season. So it'll just make your life easier

if you just feel like turning back the clock, or maybe you're watching an old season to get ready for an upcoming season of something. So go check that out, super fun. Thanks to our friend Paul for organizing that stuff. And thanks to everyone who helped Paul out. I know he got some input for a bunch of, a bunch of you all. So thank you to everyone who's been helping us with this ongoing project.

There will be more and more archives up on the site soon enough. Yes. And speaking of Mormon's, we are covering the secret lives of Mormon wives that is currently available everywhere that you get podcasts, go check that out. And we'll see you next week, Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. Let's get to the Real Housewives of Dubai, reunion part one, and possibly part one

of the last reunion of all time for this show. We don't really know. Oh my goodness, that's wild. It's wild, but you know, I don't know. Things cost money. So I was trying to figure out, is this going to be a two part reunion or a three part reunion? It doesn't feel like they have enough for three parts. But the way they were stretching out this first part of the show made me feel like they were trying to get across the finish line for three episodes worth of content.

What did you think? I couldn't tell. It was really hard to tell. It was a fun reunion though. I've just learned not to ask. At this point, I'm just going with the flow guys. I'm just like chill, you know me, just chill, Ronnie. Just chill. Take what comes to you from Bravo. Yeah.

At this point, I'm just taking what I can get. And that's what Bravo did. They kind of starved us for a bit. And now we're just like, well, take it. I don't even know why we're doing a podcast complaining about anything, honestly. Because I just, you know what my podcast should be called? Watch What Is Grateful.

Watch What Clapens, okay? I'm clapping for everything. I'm just grateful to be here, okay? Yes. So we open up the reunion with people arriving in New York and getting into glam. And Chanel's wearing a black dress and a veil covering her face. She opened up the reunion with people arriving in New York and getting into glam. And Chanel's wearing a black dress and a veil covering her face.

And she's like, I'm here for the darling for the funeral. I'm not here to play with no bitch. So she's ready to get into get to business. I'm kind of sick of her outfits. I'm sick of her. I'm sick of her to be like, I have a covered face. That's how I'm coming. Like I'm wacky. I'm crazy. her being like, I have a covered face. That's how I'm coming. Like I'm wacky, I'm crazy.

I need more. There, I said it. I just said I'm really grateful. I'm like, you know what? I'm sick of you. I'll take whatever the witch is wearing of ill. Fuck that bitch. I just need more.

I think your costumes are great and funny and everything, but I don't know. It's like drag queens have to do more. you know what I mean? Like lip sync. So I need more from you. There I said it. Okay, so Lee says, like, I'm so tired. I'm so jet lagged. My flight wasn't good at all. Well, that's kind of your attitude this whole season, frankly. You have been jet lagged and tired and moody this entire season. So I think that it's only fitting that that's your reunion. Like, how are you feeling for the

reunion? Jet lagged? Yeah, and then we go to a producer goes up to Stan Burr and goes, How are you feeling, Caroline? Pumped. Absolutely pumped. Sergio is an entire world away, another hemisphere, time zones so far away, I could not be happier. Can't you tell? I feel like Rocky in that film. I'm standing at the bottom of stairs looking and imagining running up them and just thinking,

no, I'm not going to do that. So she's Stanbury goes up to Ayaan and she's like, I was just thinking, this is the first season that I've got friends. Ha ha ha ha ha. Is this what friends do with each other? If I'm going to get angry and stop pointing at people, I'm going to point with this. I've got a gigantic million dollar finger on my hand. Thank you, Michael. I mean, Michael doesn't give me anything. It's not borrowed at all. And then we are starting to see, like we're seeing them in glam, but it's also interspersed with like little clips of what's to come on the reunion. Then we go back to, we go to Ion. I'm gonna sort of skip the stuff that we see in the future cause we're going to

get to it, but Ion. We're going to see it in the future. We see it in the future. It's why I don't pay sidekicks. I'm like, you're telling me something I'm going to see for free anyway. Would I pay you? So Ion's in glam and she's like, guys, I've been dreaming about this day for months, you know? Uh, and cause she is excited to see Lisa and confront her because their

friendship is falling apart. Yeah. So then we have a lot of flashes of what's gonna come and then we go to the stage and Andy, you know, slouched over in his chair scrolling through Grindr or whatever as he normally is. And then Ayaan walks in very glamorously and he's just kind of like, wow, you're so understated. She's like, I wanted to walk in fashion really late, but I'm first. I'm first, Santi. He's like, do not care. Did you know that there's a homosexual two feet away from me? Where are you? We are not rolling. So, like, don't have to pretend like I'm friends with you just yet. Although I will get cozy under your dress.

Yeah, he was like using her dress as a blanket and stuff. That was cute. And then Stanbury comes next, and she goes, who knew that I would, that we would be on the same side together? But it was pretty easy. It was either sit on her side or have them fly Sergio out from Dubai. And I said, put me next to Ion. I'll do anything. Where are we? Are we in Dubai? Are we in New York? This is insane. This looks exactly like Dubai. Rolf, is this Dubai or like literally where are we? Did I just get on a plane to fly 14 hours to Dubai?

Like has Dubai that grown that much? I mean, I would know. I'm married to a real estate moat. He's built all of Dubai by him. This is literally insane. And then Lisa comes on next. She looks like she's wearing like a Jeff Koons sculpture and she comes on. She looks like AI liquid metal. You know, like in Zelda how they make water look so real or at least it used to look real. And now it just looks like that metal kind of, that's what she's, I mean,

this woman is beyond stunning. Every time she comes on, I'm just like, wow, what, what is life like like that? Can you ever be happy? Can you ever be truly that happy being that beautiful? I just don't see how it works. It is actually a pretty stunning cast. I was like looking at them all sitting around on the sofa so I was like, they are like all knockouts.

It's kind of wild. So- I hate even pointing that out. I'm usually not like, oh my God, she's so pretty because it's like, of course, like they're on TV,. I'm usually not like, oh my God, she's so pretty. Because it's like, of course, like they're on TV, they're hired to be pretty, you know what I mean? And it just seems like, I don't know, it's like, she's me, but she's pretty!

Like well, what about all the ugly people? You know? Like, it's not fair to give someone extra points for being pretty. And it's not like extra points. It's just like, I just can't stop staring at her. It's not like a boner. I don't have like, I'm not like real housewives who do bisexual, but she's just, there's just something. I can't stop looking at her. She's just so pretty. She's so shiny today. Like her dress, her hair. I just

want to watch Mario run all over her and like jump from platform to platform. You were studying, like you were studying computer work. Yeah. I mean, does her dress sort of look like molten plastic? Yes, but like it works for her. She is gorgeous and you know, it looks great. So it's like a plastic doll or rubber doll. What are plastic? What are dolls made out of? Who cares? Let's think about it another day. You know, yeah. So she's not supposed to use that anymore because it kills birds or something. Mylar? Because a lot of yeah, a lot of people get in trouble for using Mylar balloons because they, I don't know, they get, I don't know, do birds like see the reflection

and then like crash into the sun? I don't know, they do something terrible to birds. And so you're not supposed to use them. And I just like that Lisa's kind of embracing her villain edit, like I'm wearing a Mylar balloon today. Maybe, I guess if you're not supposed to use Mylar anymore, I mean, that's really gonna be a big hit to the prom industry.

I mean, how are you supposed to decorate those gym walls? Well, you know who else still uses them all the time? People who do gender reveals, but we already hate that. They are more than birds. We literally already hate that. They are harm just a lot more than birds. We literally already hate them. By the way, I haven't watched all of Secret Lives and Mormon Wives, but I just have to imagine that by the end of the season, we will have seen some sort of gender reveal. If there's ever a group of people who are probably just like salivating for a gendered reveal, it's going to be those girls. Oh my God. Totally.

And I hope it's for that girl's husband so we can find out if he's been on Tinder or Grindr. So rumors are a rumor. It's just an app reveal. Yeah. The gender our husband has been cheating on us with reveal. Also you know it was really weird watching this because, sorry, we're not supposed to speculate, but literally I can't help it.

Like that whole cast looks like they're from Sean Cote. Or like Active Duty. But what was I gonna say? It was very, I feel so bad for this show because it really is, it has been such a good year for this show. And I think a lot of people didn't give it a chance this season because the first season kind of blew.

And then they just keep getting fucked over again and again. This time they got fucked over in the way of airing the same night as the presidential debate. And this was not just any presidential debate. This was Mama La Camilla versus Trump. And it was fucking funny. Even I watched it because- It was the funniest debate of all time.

It was so good. It was like literally the best comedy on television. And so I'm sorry if a little bit of that seeps in today. I know people don't love us talking about politics, but guess what? It's that kind of a world, and it's happening right now in front of our face. But it's hard to get it out of my head as I watch this,

so I just apologize in advance. But God, whoever produced that, great job last night. Well, there's a fine line between sometimes a real housewives reunion and a presidential debate. And when you have one candidate, you know, saying that there are people eating cats and dogs in Ohio, you know, that does sort of sound like something that someone on the real housewives would say. Like I can imagine Teline being like, like, why, why would you think, you know, you come at the Louie,

but you're eating like Margaret eats cats and dogs, you know, in Springfield, so, you know. It's one of those things where, I mean, I turned it on. I was talking to my cousin Jenna, and we were talking, you know, about whatever it is. She goes, are you going to watch this debate? I was like, it's on. And I flipped it on, and I turned it on right at the part where he goes,

they're eating cats. they're eating cats. And I was like, I gotta go. This is the most amazing shit. One of many hilarious moments. Kamala just like cracking up, like, oh, can you, can you believe that? I was dying. Okay, so back to the reunion.

Welcome to the Real Housewives of Dubai Season 2 reunion. I'm Andy Cohen. Hold on, everybody. Wait for the parade of highs. I am. I believe. I care. I'm Ross.

Hold on, Andy. I'm on the phone with Ross. Hi, Ross. Hold on, Andy. I'm on the phone with Ross. Hey, Ross, Ross. Yeah, Andy's saying hi. Say hi to Andy. OK, Andy, say hi to Ross. Say hi to Ross. Could you please have Ross get off the phone during your evening?

How dare you? I'm telling everyone here not to support Andy Cohen. He just told my husband to get off the phone. And I would just like to say this to Andy Cohen. No one is going to eat at your restaurant ever again. All right. I'm really not too concerned. Okay. Well, the luxurious ladies you do buy took us on a journey from Beyonce to bonsai trees. I don't remember the Bonsai Trees, but sure. From Beyonce to Bonsai Trees to Bali to Boobies to Barari to... ...Blocus, they played the game called Blocus?

The Blob? The Blob? They went and saw a movie called The Blob. And then back again, what other B-words are there? This cast has taken us from empty set to empty set. Are there anybody, is there anybody living in Dubai? Probably not. We've seen empty chilies.

We've seen empty, literally every restaurant they've ever been to has been empty. Let's go see the place where the Beyonce concert was. Fittingly, it's empty. We have transformed our set into the stunning Palm Jumeirah, and in an effort to make this feel more like Dubai, we've asked our entire staff to film this remotely. Everyone's at home, and those are robots operating the cameras. We're just here in an empty space. I like that he's like, so wait always say it's the lullaby.

No Andy. Oh yeah. Hello, hello, hello, hello. Sarah's just like, no, no. And this is how you say it. And she tells him very clearly. He's like, supercalifragilisticexpidalli. No Andy.

That's Mary Poppins. All right. Hola, como estas, que tal, que oras? No Andy is not. Mary Poppins. All right. Oh, like almost askeet. No ideas. No, that's no Andy. That's something else really different. So then he's like, Wow, this is where you guys went to the Beyonce concert. Are you a VVIP tonight? I was a joke from the show, everybody.

VVIP. Honey, I'm always in VVIP. Well, I would like to make a bold declaration and say, it seems like you all had great seats for Beyonce. And they're like, no. No. No. No.

My seats were better. I also love that they had another set with a body of water in the center of the stage. I know. It was shimmering in the background the entire time. So nobody could get up and like cross. They're like trying to stop cross, you know, walk-offs and stuff like that.

Just make it so uncomfortable to get up and cross the stage. Well, you know, hi, Stanbury. I know, I need to say you look outstanding. Full facelift for half. And what about the boobs? Tell me about the boobs. Did Berrari prove them? So which pet boys did you go to and how many oil changes did they give your boobs? Let's talk about that, my right guy. And she's like, actually, Andy, I didn't get a full facelift because they didn't actually lift my eyebrows, but it's called a full facelift, so I don't really understand it.

It's like the Sergio of medical procedures. It happens. Don't know if I really understand it, but it's part of my life now. Sort of like Sergio being considered a fool man, even though he does nothing emotionally or physically to prove it. Does that make any sense?

So Ayan's like, she looks younger than me now. I am younger than you, bitch. So. Well, that's debatable. Hey, Talene, welcome to your first reunion. She's like, I am literally so happy to be here, Andy. I would like to thank every, hey guys, I have a question. Are we in Dubai or are we in New York?

I'm serious right now. Well, when you joined the show, I'm sure you wouldn't have imagined that you'd be sitting anywhere but next to Brooks. I know Andy, that's a lot to unpack for sure. Okay, quiet with my lines. That's my line. She's fired up.

You know what Andy, hopefully by the end of this, we can do some shotskis. All right, you're really pushing it now. Hey Andy, can I ask you, how are your new boobs? Okay, you know what, that's it. Get off the stage. Andy, the reason why I'm not sitting next you know what, that's it. Get off the stage. Andy, the reason why I'm not sitting next to Brooks is that she's the jackal of the week.

All right, all right, get her out of here. So Andy's like, hi Sarah. Hey Sarah, how are you doing my first words in Arab Spanish Chinese a bit? And she's like, Andy, it was fine. Well, what's your prayer for this group today? And he's like, my prayer is to, you know, just stop the nonsense and negativity, because we really need to shine light. We need to shine light on truth. TM, please sign up for my newest seminar, Shining the Light on Truth, hosted by me and my

pretend boyfriend that I lied about all season, Hakeem. Thank you. We need to shine the light on truth just how I told Mackie that the invaders will shine the light on his face before they abduct him. God, he's so traumatized. I don't know why. Okay, Brox! Brox! Good to see you, Brox. Hi, Eddi. Good to see you too, Eddi., good to see you, Brooks. She's like, hi, Ed, good to see you too, Ed. Really good to see you. This is another one. I mean, what a stunner. Yeah.

How does Brooks look so, I mean, look, she always looks good, but how does she look 10? Are they? I know. Have they started just selling filters that you're allowed to wear in public now? Like, what the fuck is happening on this show? I feel like she gave herself some sort of like chin botox

or like lower lip, like something like a soul patch Botox. Cause when she was talking the whole time, she was like barely moving her lower lip. She's like, it was like, she had to like lift her head up to and just like let gravity drop her jaw because it seemed like she was having trouble just getting her lips open. She's like, and then the very,

I don't know what that means. Like what happened to my lips? Lip mobility, I should say. Okay, did you fly private today? It's like, I flew Emirates. It's pretty much almost the equivalent of flying private, Andy, but it's not private exactly, but it basically is private.

I'm very, very rich, Andy. You know, with private, with Emirates, at least all the toilets are exactly where they're supposed to be. They're not down in the next level below. All right, at least. You know what, I was gonna bring Zoltan, but you know what I found that,

if there's a cracked toilet on the plane, your asshole could actually get sucked out of the plane and thrown into the sky. So I just left Zoltan at home. You know, better safe than sorry, Andy. We've had our problems, but he does still pay for the glass house. I mean, I pay for the glass house myself. Nevermind, forget what we're

talking about. Unfortunately, that's actually an urban legend about the cracked toilet and sucking you out to the sky. Because trust me, I've definitely tried with the Sergio. I said, Sergio, sit on this toilet, then took a sledgehammer to it. I said, well, that's the end of him. And then five minutes later, he came out. It was terrifying. Unfortunately, getting a fork stuck in a toaster doesn't really work either. I guess they've made safety regulations on that one. God, I'm going to just have to keep trying. Dropped my ear down there and handed him a fork and said,

please get my ear. If you get my earring, I'll have a baby. No, does it? Unfortunately, Sergio doesn't quite understand how to use a fork because he learned everything he knows from the Little Mermaid, so a lot of it winds up in his hair. He doesn't even understand you need a good fork to have a baby in the first place, Alfie. So that's where we're at. He thinks a toaster is where you place postcards, so he has a lot of problems. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappins's time for a Crappin's commercial.

What's up guys? It's your girl Kiki and my podcast is back with a new season and let me tell you it's too good and I'm diving into the brains of entertainment's best and brightest. Every episode I bring on a friend. I mean the likes of Amy Poehler, Kel Mitchell, Vivica Fox, the list goes on. So follow, watch and listen to baby. This is Kiki Palmer on the Wondery app, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Welcome to the Offensive Line. You guys, on this podcast, we're gonna make some picks, talk some shit, and hopefully make you some money in the process. I'm your host, Annie Agar. So here's how this show's gonna work, okay? We're gonna run through the weekly slate of NFL and college football matchups,

breaking them down into very serious categories like no offense. No offense Travis Kelce, but you gotta step up your game if Pat Mahomes is saying the Chiefs need to have more fun this year. We're also handing out a series of awards and making picks for the top storylines surrounding the world of football. Awards like the He May Have a Point award for the wide receiver that's most justifiably bitter. Is it Brandon Iyuk, T. Higgins, or Devontae Adams? Plus on Thursdays we're doing an exclusive bonus episode on Wondery+, where I share my fantasy football picks ahead of Thursday Night Football and the weekend's matchups. Your fantasy league is as good as locked in.

Follow the offensive line on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can access bonus episodes and listen ad-free right now by joining Wondry app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can access bonus episodes and listen ad free right now by joining Wondry Plus. Well, Lisa and Ion, we're going to get into this more later, but you know, coming off of your explosive fight on the finale, am I right? Come on. Oh wait, first he's like, Hey Lisa. And she's like, Hi Andy. He's like, hey, Lisa. And she's like, hi, Andy. He's like, oh my God, are you wearing Alexander McQueen or Alexander Sheen? And she's like, oh God. And he's like, your BravoCon read was epic, Lisa.

Epic. What a read. And then we get a clip of her epic BravoCon read, which is he said, who has the worst fashion? And she said, Sheree, it's almost like you went by she, you went from she by Sheree, instead you went she by Sheen. And everyone's like, oh my God, epic.

That was not a great read, I'm sorry. And it was also, I think a read directly from the Housewives show already. Like they already did that on the Housewives of Atlanta and also It needs two syllable if it's gonna be she by Sheree. It needs to be like she by Shoshene or something, you know what I mean? Stumbled it out and I say this as someone who often stumbles his punchlines out But you know, he he's she sort of stumbled it out

I think it got a big response because everyone was so surprised. They came from Lisa Milan. Everyone's like, wait, wait, we don't even know who this person is on the edge of this, the edge of this panel. And she just read charade out of nowhere. So I think people. Yeah. And then also coming for charade was kind of an odd choice. You know what I mean? Yeah. I just felt like don't come for charade. This is her 19th time. She's had a rough couple of years. Like, just let her do her thing. So Andy goes, you Dubai women do not play around when it comes to reading people. And Ayaan goes, no, we live in Dubai.

Like, we're too wealthy to play games. So- Women have only been allowed to read here for a few years, so we're really just, we're just, we're just, we're just, we're just, we're just, we're just, we're just, we're just, we're just, we're just, We're too wealthy to play games. So women have only been allowed to read here for a few years, so we're really just giving it our all at this point.

Okay, that was low, Ronnie. That was low. Well, Lisa and I, we're going to get into this more later, but we're coming off of your explosive fight. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Do I have any hair left? It was Singed. What an explosive fight.

It wasn't that explosive. Okay. It was a fight, but it was not. I would actually never say it was an explosive fight because we've seen explosive fights. We watched them. We just finished watching New Jersey for crying out loud. This was like maybe explosive for Dubai, but it was literally like, do you not think I'm a good friend? You're not a good friend. And that was the end of the season. What was the word they were fighting over? That'll come up, I'm sure it'll be like-

The word that they were fighting over, berare. Berare. Oh, bragging. On the phone, bragging. Berare. There was a bragging. You said that she said that I was bragging.

I never said she was bragging. You said bragging. I never said bragging. I was bragging. There was a bra. You said that she said that I was bragging. I never said she was bragging. You said bragging. I never said bragging. You said bragging. Oh. Explosive. That was explosive. Hashtag explosive.

Hashtag bragging about how explosive that finale was. It must be still raw after being burned from that explosion because that was explosive. Wasn't this film like two years ago? I don't think it's that raw. So Lisa's like, it was definitely so raw, Andy, to watch it. And he's like, what are things better now than when we wrapped? And she's like, no, you know, and it's like sad. It's so sad. And Lisa goes, yeah, it's like so sad. And Lisa goes, yeah, it's like so sad.

Wow, God, I feel terrible that our TV show ripped apart this friendship. How long were you two as tight as you were? And she's Lisa's like, well, I was pregnant with Sebastian when we first met and Sebastian's now. And the saddest thing for me is missing the kids. I really love them so much. I miss picking them up at school. I miss going on vacations with them. I miss watching them try to take care of a goat before the goat

run away and die. That poor goat. Miss goat. Miss goat. Never forget. And have the husband stayed friends? No, they have not stayed friends. And I was like, they keep in touch. And Lisa's like, no, no, not really. She's like, but they still like each other. No, but they still maybe got them. No. But they still maybe golf some. No.

Okay, I think your husband might be lying to you. Your husband might be in a club when he's supposed to be babysitting the kids except this time he's with Chris. Just saying. Well, that's a bummer. I know you're feeling especially raw because you just watched the finale last night.

I'm really trying to push the raw thing. Who here feels raw? Okay, all right, Talene, how raw would you just watched the finale last time. I'm really trying to push the raw thing. Who here feels raw? OK. All right, Tilleen, how would you feel if this happened to you while you were being rejected from a Hillsdale restaurant? So raw, Andy. You don't even know how raw. I would actually start calling Rafi Rafi.

Rafi, you are so raw right now also, right? You're raw too because I'm raw. I'm so raw right now also, right? You're raw too, because I'm raw. I'm so raw, Andy. The only rarer person than me is Marissa, whose asshole has been chewed over 27 times after she refused to see us at the Hillstone. Do you actually care about Marissa? She was the least popular person on our entire cast.

No, not Marissa Herrmer from Ladies of London. I'm talking about the bitch Hostess in Kirby Hillstone. Bitch. Good, because that lady threw a hot dog party. I mean... I'm still traumatized, and I had to pretend I enjoyed Juliette during the entire time. Could you imagine? How American.

I started to understand Romeo's point of view just to get away from her. You know what I'm saying? Honestly. Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou not destroying Juliet right now? Get her out of my face. Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou not taking me with you, Romeo? Do you know what I'm saying?

Juliet, God, speak quiet. There was a time before it was easier to use a knife than earplugs, they weren't invented then. You know what I mean? You know, I came to realize that the reason why they're called Juliette balconies is because they're the best way to shove her off of buildings. Oh.

So then Andy's like, well, can we set an intention to live in a better place than we are right now? And Lisa's like, well, can we set an agenda to live in a better place than we are right now? And Lisa's like, what Andy, a better place than accusing somebody of using the word bragging? I don't know Andy, think about it. I'd like to set an agenda that I could have lunch somewhere where I'm not kicked out, raw.

Okay, well, we've got a lot to discuss, so let's get right into it. Much. Our chests are going to be destroyed by the end because between Andy and Tolene. Okay, between the much like the pineapple that I on gifted Stambury this season. Wait, that happens.

God, this show sounds hilarious. What channel is it on? Focus Andy. Okay. All right. Two former frenemies went from prickly to sweet. Wait a minute, is that because pineapples are prickly and sweet? Who wrote this? You guys did great. Remind me where the bonsai tree comes into this. Anyway, while they hit a major speed bump in Bali, it didn't take long for these two queens to take a big swing back in the right direction.

They were on a swing. I'm getting it now. Okay, it's a lot to unpack and quiet, quiet. Stop saying that. Listen, he always has one or two like, are swimming pools wet or is this friendship drowned? Let's get like, he's always got one thing like that, but like they're starting to add 10 things

into one paragraph. It's starting to sound like he's reading a children's story in Haiku. You know what I mean? It is just on chat GPT here. This is, if there's ever been a case against AI, it's Andy's monologues, his setups in all the reunion. Because you cannot tell me the human wrote this.

This was like a bot. Okay. Like is there a prompt for chat GPT? Give us, okay. I don't know what the prompt would be. If I could come up with the prompt, I would feed it into it right now, but I can't even come up with a prompt. So I'm not going to, how do you come up with prompts? Like, set up a. I think you would say, yeah. In the voice of Andy Cohen. Have Andy set up a clip package

leading to the friendship breakdown of Lisa Milan and Ion, Chanel Ion during. This is too much, I guess. This is why humans are too stupid to even work AI. I need AI to figure out a prompt to give to AI. Yeah, I'm too stupid. I mean, like, yeah, I definitely need AI to help me with AI. Okay, so then we see, you know, a clip package

and it's basically about Brooks calling Lisa out for being jealous, you know, that whole fight. So then Andy's like, Ion, Grand from Rapids says, Chanel and Caroline are the iconic duo. I never knew I needed. Chanel, when did you want to be friends with her after not being able to stand her last season?

And Ion's like, well, when we left here last year, we were stuck on a plane for 16 hours, like stuck. Not like we couldn't go anywhere. It was like waking up next to Sergio and he was horny and you're stuck there in that bed and you're too tired to go up and get some coffee, but too annoyed to stay there with his tuna breath. And that's what he smells like in the AM. annoyed to stay there with his tuna breath and that's what he smells like in the am. Listen, Andy, it's basically like after being married to Sergio for one year, you look over and you realize you're stuck. You're just too old to run. Do you understand what I mean? You realize that if you actually try to get away from Sergio and go into the kitchen, you might encounter some quote unquote children that you apparently had 13 or 14 years ago.

There's literally not a room I can go into, Andy. I'm starting to understand the whole boarding school thing now. So basically, they're like, well, we got stuck on a plane. So we actually talked because there was no one to interrupt us. And you don't see like Dan when you're stuck for 16 hours watching Coco on repeat, eventually you show a cry and realize that you're more bonded than you ever thought you would be. Yeah. So hey, I honest and Barry hamburger from helper says you two seem so different, but you look like you have so much fun together. I mean, what do you have in common and what do you like about each other?

Let me, let me take a guess here. Is it that you both have boobs? You both have boobs. Tell me about your boobs. Let's talk about, do you guys compliment each other's boobs? You should, you both got great boobs. Who's got new boobs?

Anybody? It's a lot to on back there, Andy. Like she's funny. Like she's really, really funny. She makes me laugh. And you know what I mean? Like, and I like her straightforwardness and she doesn't play with bullshit. She tells me how she feels.

And here's what I like about Aion. She's not Sergio. Listen, Andy, it's the same reason I offered my my embryo to the mailman. He's not Sergio. Not American and not Sergio. You get past those two hurdles. You're good in my book. And they're like, Oh, my god, I love her. She's so funny. She's so real. She's so fun. And Stamber is like, yeah, and we have kids and we're both going to college.

And then, you know, we, I know it sounds crazy because, you know, it looks like it would be completely different, you know, dresses like a clown, dresses like a class act, but at the same time, we both put on clothes. You know what I mean? And look, Ayaan went to her own form of boarding school and she didn't live You know what I mean? And look, Ayaan went to her own form of boarding school and she didn't live at home. I mean, her boarding school was a lot more depressing than mine was. You know, mine had air conditioning and a cafeteria. But still. You know, perhaps my boarding school, yes, it was perhaps more privileged. Perhaps I

was immediately connected with future captains of industry, but you know, we both were, went through very, very deep traumas, perhaps hers more than mine. But I'm going to say that me having to have three square meals a day was very traumatic. So I think mine's pretty much up there with hers. And so then she was like, you know, I understand all the things that irritated me to death about her. You know, I understand where it comes from. She was like, I understand why she's annoying now, Andy,

which really helps. And he's like, so you told me after last year that you had a drink with Ayan, but you didn't tell the other women. Why not, secretive? And she's like, well, I just felt that I wanted to see if there was any route to a better friendship without anyone's opinion as to who she really was.

You know what I mean? I don't want to say any names, but she was a whore and her business steals designs from Amazon. Also, Andy, let's be honest, I thought we were one season wonder. So why would I ever talk to any of these women again after the last reunion so so and he's like well so did Ion did did Ion tell you girls about the drink when it happened Lisa and Lisa's like no but Ion used to tell me all the time like hey she's calling we're talking and I was always fine with it no problems all right well to lean Cindy All right, well, Tilleen, Cindy from the Brady Bunch, whoa,

called and said, called out, says, Brooks and Lisa called out each other for being jealous of Ayan and Stambury's relationship. Who do you think is more bothered by this friendship and why? You know what, Andy? I think that Lisa is the most bothered. And also I think that Brooks enjoys that because Brooks loves seeing the demise of that friendship. And I think Brooks was like a real cheerleader about it. She was a cheerleader. I mean, are we on the football

field or are we in New York City? Am I right? Like, give her some pom poms. This is not the pom whatever it's called. This is not the pom, whatever it's called. This is actually the pom pom, whatever it's called. You see what I did there? So Andy's like, well, Briggs, what are you thinking about this friendship? And she's like, I don't care about it. I'm like, can we show a clip package of her

doing her thing on the edge of a chair? Ha ha ha ha. It's over there sucking. Oh my God, Lisa's so jealous. Oh my God. Pulling the mic down, did you do that? Where she like pulls the mic down and says, Hello, what's up? She loves watching chaos. She just loves chaos.

And she's like, I don't even care about it. And he's like, really, are you sure about that? I mean, really, seriously, is this Jersey? Are we on the shore? Are you sure about that, Andy? Sorry, that was a stretch Andy, blame it on Marissa. Fucking bitch, I'm never coming to your restaurant again. Yeah, I think he's talking to me and not to you. All right, well, were you happy that it appeared to be coming between

Ayaan and Lisa's friendship? Listen, I actually got a little bit of comical-y, but when I realized it affected her emotionally, it bothered me too, and I tried to bring them back together by making sure they stayed apart and just laughing in their faces. And Lisa's like, I had no issue with them being friends, Andy, never, never any kind of issue at all, Andy.

Which is also a lie, you know? And it's like, okay, well, but you did call them desperate on Watch What Happens Live. And so we cut back and she's like, yeah, well, I don't know that I would call them the dynamic duo. I think that I would probably call them the desperate duo. By Shein. So then Lisa's like, well, while they were getting to know each other, they would go out

and they would have things. Ayaan would message me complaining like, you know, oh, I'm not happy. And, you know, so I never felt the need. I never felt like it was a threat because she just hated Stamper so much. And Ayaan's like, so when me and Stamper started hanging out, yes, I did say that to you.

And it's going to take me some time to get to know her and Lisa's like, but the messages were more like, I feel so uncomfortable. And you know, this is 2024 and the word uncomfortable is like the worst thing you could ever be. If you make somebody uncomfortable, you've basically just run over them with a car and then drove up, drove off. You cannot make people uncomfortable. So she's like, yeah. The message was saying, Caroline made her feel uncomfortable. And I was like, uncomfortable?

I never said uncomfortable. Show it, show it, please show it. And she's like, I will. Here Andy, here's my phone where it says specifically uncomfortable. And she's like, I never said uncomfortable. Please show me saying uncomfortable. I cannot believe you accused me of saying I'm comfortable. Andy, they're eating cats. Wait a minute. What?

They're coming here. They're eating cats. They're eating the dogs of the people that live here. I don't even know what you're talking about. What are you doing? I'm sorry. I'm reading from the notes of the debate. Sorry. Please tell me. Please tell me on your phone. They're doing transgender experiments on illegal aliens in prison. So Andy's like... Trying to make all of our prisoners transgender in prison.

Alright. Okay. Let me read this text message. It says muscle bottom 35 meters away. Whoops. Wrong phone. Okay. Here comes one right now. She struck him with her motor vehicle.

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I don't really get what this is really supposed to say, Lisa. Yeah, cause Andy's like, yeah, but they just said that publicly. It's not a big secret that it took them a minute. And Andy's like, yeah. And now you're trying to use it against me. Like what the fuck is wrong with you? And Lisa's like, I'm using it against you.

You're a professional victim. Look at you. And she goes, oh, Lisa, she's like, professional victim. No, you can't. And Chanel, Chanel, don't bow to it. Don't bow to it. Here here's a photo of Sergio. Do you want to punch it instead? Use your use your emotions productively. So I am like, that is probably the worst word you could use to me. And he goes, no, not play. I'm not the villain playing the victim. She goes, no, you're calling me a victim. And you know, that's the worst word you could use on me. And Andy's like, oh no. Okay, let's move on. No, you're calling me a victim. You can not say that.

I know it's so, so mean to make fun of people crying and like how they're crying. And I actually really like Aion. But I can't. It's like every time I hear it, I just hear like an old man down a well like, anybody out there? Please put down a rope, I fell. All right, all right, all right. Okay.

Yo-play from Yogurt says, I love your relationship with Taj and I love seeing him as the face of Ion Beauty as he's still pursuing modeling, has a work for your other cool brands, and would he ever be interested in like a salt and pepper daddy who's a pretty successful media mogul these days? So he is working a lot. He's hot, so he's a model.

And now Andy's like, well, I am, Ginger Bush says. Oh my God, Ginger Bush, disgusting. There's probably someone named Ginger Bush who's like related, just like, my cousin's Jenna Bush. It's like, whatever, fucking Ginger Bush. I know and everybody's like, what the hell, Andy? But I wouldn't be surprised if Andy was like, double penetration is my life, wants to know.

Arianne's age came out when she dances. Mama's about 53. I see you in Bali. It was revealed your age is between 45 and 50. So what age do you think you actually are? And how old do you think Ginger Bush is? She's like, I'm over 50 50 Andy, because my bones are weak. So then they all, you know, he sent it around

and everyone's like, oh my God, she looks right. She's like 38. And then Stamberry goes, I'm just grateful that she's older because there's so much ageism in this group, you know? And Lisa's like, because you guys don't act your age. Oh my god, you're really killing it today. No, it's more like ageism as in I, you guys are actually too nice to people that are their own age. Why are we not all piling on Sergio? He's so much younger than us, kick him, kick him while he's down. So then Andy is like, so what's going on with you, Stambury? How old are you? And she's like,

I'm 48. And he goes, well, that's pretty young to do the full Monte, you know, I guess, meaning her facelift. Because, you know, to me, that means the movie from the early 2000s. Yeah. So Stambury is like, I've been doing filler in Botox since I was 26, and after a while, you begin to look a bit odd, you know, because you have to melt it, because you're basically putting filler on top of filler, on top of filler, on top of filler, and before you know it, you wake up

and it's actually talking to you in bed, begging you for a baby. Don't you mean? Well, how do you ladies think Stanbury looks? And they're like, I think she looks really fresh. And he's like, okay, what about you, Lisa? She goes, Lisa goes, she looks okay. Okay, she looks okay.

And Sarah's like, babe, babe, I love it. You know what, keep doing whatever you do. Of course, Sarah's gonna say that. She's a whole other person. I know. So then Andy's like, so we love most of the ladies cheering you on at Eye on Beauty, but you know what?

You seem pretty upset when Brooks on social media was crediting your partner, Tony. You know where she was also crediting her? The show. But I guess, you know, was more upset about it on social media. So she's like, yeah. And then we see the scene of Brooks being like,

I would like to congratulate my friend Tony for having wonderful in there. Tony is so talented. So I am beauty by Tony, which is basically totally beauty by Tony. I just want to say, you know what, who really is responsible for this Tony of totally beauty. So congratulations to totally beauty, a totally Tony beauty. Okay. I just wanted to get that across that I'm not at all talking about my friend Tony or being shady and she's like, well, I didn't even mean anything. I don't know why anybody's mad at me.

I don't think it was rude for me to say congratulations. I like Tony malt malt, one of my favorite flavorings. So, uh, I'm surprised no one took this opportunity to say, Brooks, you had a meltdown about like, basically your business being overlooked later on, at least Milan Spa event, because you understand how important it is and how hard it is to start your own business

and to bring light to your own business. So how could you be shading someone else who's having their own business? I thought that was- Oh, that's true. Like a pretty obvious, like, that's an easy one to go after. But she got off the hook on that one. I'm sure. Well, here's the thing. The ratings of this show are very low. I mean, there's like five of us watching this and one of those five is not Andy. So I don't think anybody produced this show,

actually watched it. So that was kind of one of those questions they best, I think. So Tellian's like, you discredited Ayan. You said it was Tony's event, much like Marissa at Hillstone of Kirby Dallas discredited Ross, who had to have a very important phone call about his fancy football team. And Brooks is like, I'm talking. I'm talking. Excuse me. I'm talking right now. I'm talking, I'm talking, excuse me, I'm talking right now, I'm talking, I'm talking, are you still talking,

you're not still talking? Well guess what, I'm talking now. Is she still talking, she's not talking anymore? Well guess what, somebody tell her I'm talking. Somebody tell her, okay, I'm gonna talk now. Are you talking? Okay, I'm gonna talk. Okay, I'm gonna do it.

I'm gonna move on, all right. Concepts from Other Plan says, Ayan, it was nice to hear you open up about your FGM experience. Has there been any more backlash from your community? And so obviously- Yeah, basically this leads to a very serious moment. So I'm not gonna make fun of it.

I love when I dive into the FGM thing and full on Andy goes, I know, FGM! But this is obviously a very serious topic. And so Ion talks more about this and, you know, and how tough it was and, you know, being public about it. Basically coming out about it and like all that, you know, that leaves you vulnerable to what everybody's saying online

and being, you guys are circumcised. What part did it cut? You know, just people being assholes online. And so now that Lisa is calling her a victim, she knows, she should know how hurt that her hurtful that, and she starts crying now. Listen, I know I give Lisa a lot of shit right now because she's just, I'm chat lagged, but I don't think this is really fair to like lump Lisa in with this.

I mean, Lisa is calling you a victim. And I do think that Lisa is purposely doing that is like purposely using that word to kind of trigger her. But I don't know, lumping her in with this whole like mutilation storyline seems to be a bit much. But then I feel like Lisa's kind of doing it to herself by purposely triggering her eye on by using the word victim. What do you think? I don't know, now that I've talked it out loud,

I don't know how I feel anymore. I've changed my mind. Well, I think Lisa being formally being such a close friend with Aion should probably know that victim is a trigger word for Aion. She got into a whole fight with Sarah about it between seasons. And so she just does never want to even hear the word victim, even if it's in a different context. So Lisa should know that. So it seems like Lisa probably said that on purpose, but I don't know. I think Lisa was being sincere when she's, believe it or not, I do think she's being sincere when she meant like, I was using victim in the other way. But it it's a tricky one.

Yeah, cause she was like, I am in our situation, you are acting like a victim. And she's like, how could I dare you? And I don't know, it seems like a petty thing to even be worrying about, but it seems like Lisa's trying to trigger her, but then at the same time, I don't know. Yeah, so-

It's constantly used on Housewives. So I don't know where I come down. I don't even know why I'm making it a big deal. So then I'm gonna move on now. So Lisa's like, yeah, you're the victim in our situation. And then Ayan's like, I literally cried to you about it and you know that that's gonna hurt me so much. And she's like, yeah, but you do play the victim and it has nothing to do with your FGM. So drop it. And Ayan's like, I swear to God no one on this fucking couch can say that I never loved you, cared about you, fought for you to the death. And Lisa goes, that's not what's in question. You know what? She was the most ride or die for you, Lisa.

Okay? She was literally like the opposite of Marissa trying to seed us at Hillstone. Very, very committed to the cause. You were. She was so ride or die. Like if you were the extra person on a reservation at Hillstone and they refused to seat your entire party because you were the extra person, you know what she would have said?

I'm walking out of this restaurant and Marissa's never gonna work in this town again. She was like the parachute strapped to your waist while you're running in the sand in Dubai. And yeah, so she's like, yeah, she's the most ride or die for you, Lisa. And Lisa goes, and I wasn't. My issues with her, and she points us to Stanbury. She's like, my issues with Stanbury are because of you. They stem from you, Ayan. And Stanbury goes, oh, please, you never liked me. That's not true.

And Andy's like, okay, all right, we're gonna have a full conversation about this later. And then Tullian's like, Aunt Lisa, are you gonna cry? You gonna cry, Lisa? She goes, I'm not going to cry, are you? No.

And then Ayan goes, oh really, side effect of Osempi is always crying. Which is that a side effect? So. No, that's literally not. I would be sobbing every day, because you know no one loves Ozempic more than me. I'd eat an Ozempic cupcake if they made them.

I think we would. Well actually I probably would, so I wouldn't be hungry. Oh, oh, oh, Ozempic. Oh actually that's O'Reilly auto parts. Yeah. Oh, oh, Ozempic. You know side effects include crying.

We all would have heard that. Blocked, blocked, blocked, but passages, sobbing, victimhood, wait. So she's like, yeah, side effect of Ozempic is always crying. And she's like, yeah, Ozempic that you introduced me to. And she's like, because you asked me, Lisa. She goes, no, because you are on it.

And then Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams.

Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams.

Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. Aion screams. So these people are ridiculous. These housewives, I can't, you know, they're always going on, they're always OZempic shaming each other. Am I supposed to believe 90% of you are not on OZempic? Because I do not believe it. You're all fucking on it, get out of here.

Yeah. So he's like, I wanna move on, I wanna move on. So Ayan needs some water. And then Brooks is like, yeah, we can tell. Ayan's doing the most. You can sense the fear and the insecurities oozing from that bitch. So, and it's like, okay,

Brooks and Stanbury may share a first name, which I don't know what it is because I don't really watch this show. Could someone tell me that Stephanie? Sarah? Who's is Sarah? But Talia learned the hard way that they're not amazing at sharing friends. Let's take a look at Caroline versus Caroline.

Is this about Caroline Ray versus Caroline in the city? How about it? It feels between North and South Caroline. I'm in. I can't wait till I love a good state fight. So we see the scenes of Stanbury bringing up Teline's vagina showing. And then Brooks being like,

you gave her my friend's vagina, and now you come to my friend's vagina. You better back off, I'm talking, I'm talking right now. Well, it seems like you were more offended about the vagina line than Teline was, Caroline. Why do you think Brooks received it the way she did?" Stamber is like, Well, I don't know. First of all, the only person that talked about it to everybody was Brooks.

She's saying that I embarrassed her friend, yet I wasn't the one talking about it. I was talking about her once on the phone going, oh, Sergio almost saw your vagina. But don't forget, I also said, Sergio's an idiot, how can we kill him? Oh, almost, you said almost, you almost saw a vagina, is that what you're saying, that you almost saw a vagina? And she goes, whatever, saw a vagina then. She goes, she's like, oh yeah, well, Sarah goes, yeah, but you told all of us.

And she goes, yeah, I did that too. And Stanbury said, if there's any indication of how she is, then basically she doesn't belong on the show. And that triggered me, that triggered me for her to say that. I hope that just because she has a vagina, she doesn't belong on the show. And that triggered me. That triggered me for her to say that. I hope that just because she has the vagina, she doesn't belong on the show. How dare you? She said that?

She said that? That's almost as bad as saying you don't belong in Hillstone. I'm a little offended right now. So Brooks is like, yeah, she said that to me, Nina and Sarah. And Andy's like, I don't know who Nina is, but anyway, your initial reaction to the comment was, what, Talene? Well, Nina and Sarah. And Andy's like, I don't know who Nina is. But anyway, your initial reaction to the comment was what, Talene? Well, I was upset. It was messed up

for sure. But since Raph wasn't there, it was okay. Now, if Raph had been there and wasn't allowed to be on the show, then we have a problem. What was Nina's opinion about this? Oh yeah, Nina said, Caroline Stanbury. You know, she said that. How could she say that? What a fucking fruitcake. A fruitcake? How dare she? Actually, babe, I think that she was just offering her fruitcake. What? My iconic fruitcake. She has fruitcakes. Nina's just right there. Remember me? My iconic fruitcake business. So Andy's like, okay, Brooks, well, potatoes from the earth. Potatoes from the earth?

Talk about a pick me, am I right? Talk about a pick me, am I right? So, you know, why would you keep repeating the story about Teline's vagina if you were so offended by it? I feel like you were making a bigger deal about it than it was. And Brooks was like, you know what I'd like to do? I'd like to roll back. I'd like to roll back.

I don't want to roll back and go to the past. I want to go to the future. I want to make a new chapter. I want to make a new chapter in the future where we have someone in office who is respectful of the office. It's not backwards. It's not behind us. We're not looking behind us. We're looking ahead of us We're looking we're going forward in a book and not behind us in the book National stage and come back here to Dubai is this Dubai cuz I thought it was New York. I really can't tell the difference Well, I was angry at the vastness after. That's the reason. I was vaginally angry, Andy. My vagina was angry. Although it has been angry. I'm not going to say my vagina doesn't have emotions,

but at that time my vagina was not angry. I was just vaginally angry because I was angry about talking about vaginas of my friend. First, they came from my friend's earlobes. I said nothing. Then they came from my friend's wristbands. I said that. And then they came from my friend's vagina. I said, where's your vagina? You don't got a vagina anymore?

Why didn't anybody stand up for your earlobes? You understand what I'm saying, Andy? Well, I'm not really sure what to say to that. So anyway, you know, I don't even really know what to say to that. So anyway, you know, I don't even really know what you were talking about. Now I really think about it. I'm absolutely angry. That's what I'm saying.

I was angry. You know, hey, look, I got a baby caller and talked it through, but you know what I did actually say at the moment, you know, I remember saying, you know, give, give Talita chats. And when she decided I'm gonna let this go and forgive Stan Barry, it seemed like I kept going.

Is that what you're gonna say, Eddie? Just say it, Eddie, just fucking say it. Yeah, it seemed like it pissed you off even more. Well, that's not what happened. She didn't actually say I'm gonna let go. That was after the fact, but we were on Talina's balcony and Talina's like, oh, the balcony where I was apparently hysterically crying raps. Can you believe balcony where I was apparently hysterically crying wrath.

Can you believe this? I was crying on the balcony wrath. Let her talk. Let her talk. It's her first reunion, Andy, but you're going to have to tell her. I was like, oh, Lisa. Lisa, Lisa pulls out her readers. She's like, so it means like, OK, get off your high horse, Lisa, please. So, Andy was like, okay, so here's how it works.

You're gonna speak first and then you're gonna speak. Okay, so Brooks was like, okay, so on her balcony, when me and Sarah went over there that day, I was like, Sanberry is a fucking bitch. I was so angry. And it's because moments before, she, Talene, was on the floor crying and me and Sarah had to come over and console her.

Do you remember? And Sarah was like, well, no, she wasn was on the floor crying and me and Sarah had to come over and console her. Do you remember? And Sarah was like, well, no, she wasn't on the floor, but she was, she was crying in a like non-spiritually healed sort of way. You know, yes. Oh, no, no. She was crouched down. She was hysterical. She was crouched down hysterical.

And Talene's like, hysterical? You know what's hysterical? That. That's hysterical. No, no, no. She was. She got that. Do you remember?

We had to go over there. We had to pick her up. I was like, oh my God, your arm fell off. We stood back on her arm. We stood her up. I said, stand up, stand up, get serious about it. And then we see footage of her not on the floor crying. We see her being like, she talked about my vagina. Hold on, let me grab my sinuses and whisper Roth very slowly. But like this does kind of undermine like, you know, Tullien's kind of like, well, whatever, it's my vagina, no big deal. But here was clearly a scene where she was trying to make something happen. You just like, I just, it really hurts me. It's like, why is everyone talking about my vagina? So I think she was trying at that moment to be like, oh, this will be my storyline. But

then later on, she realizes actually it'll be better if I just become friends with Stanbury and just betray Brooks. Right. Brooks is a disaster. I'm switching sides. Yeah. But Brooks just, I mean, every time she saw us like, so how do you feel about Carolize Danbury telling everybody you're a whore and your vagina's every place? How do you feel about that? I was at the post office today and your picture was up. It was you. And it said, for the singer wanted.

She showed a vagina one time. You're a big trouble in this town, Missy. So Teline's like, was I on the floor, sterical? And Sarah's like, really not on the floor, babe. And she was like, I got emotional. I got emotional and that's all that happened. And she's like, yeah, well not sterical, but you were crying and you were hurt.

Listen, if you really had an issue with the whole V gate thing, when Sam Barry said it to you, you weren't fighting that off camera. And Brooks is like, didn't I say, say it on that call with Nina? Didn't I say something? And Sarah's like, she just sort of like doesn't respond to her just eyes go wide. And Brooks keeps looking at Sarah. She's like, did I say it? Did I say that on the call with you? Hey, Sarah, Sarah, Sarah. And Sarah's just like zoning out, you know?

And Tulene's like, I'm not talking to Sarah. Stop looking at other people. Talk to me. She's like, don't fucking tell me what to do. Do not tell me what to do. You shut the fuck up. So they start yelling at each other back and forth. And Brooks is like, you can put your finger down.

Nobody's afraid of you. Nobody's afraid of your finger. All right. And basically like they basically get into like a little fight and Brooks is like, oh, that was a good moment to lean into your ass. That was good. That was good. It was like, oh, okay. I want to hear from Sarah. Said no audience member ever, but I'm going to do it. I'm gonna, Sarah says something. So Sarah's like, okay, well, you know what, to Stamberry, the comment was rude. To lean, you know, she was hurt. And Brooks,

she dragged it on too long. And I love you. But I'm gonna be honest, on the phone, she said, don't talk about my friend like that. Until he's like, but who kept bringing it up and then bringing it up again. And Sarah's like, she did. And Sandy's like, okay, so you're saying she held onto it for too long, much like I've let this segment go. And he's like, okay, well, was there a part of you that was like, I went so hard for her, and now she's making up with Stanbury

and that's why you were annoyed? Or was there a part of you that was like, I brought her on to the show. And Brooks was like, oh, hell yeah. It was like, listen, like, was it that? It was that, because like,, it was like, listen, like, what is that, it was that, cause like, this is the most disloyal, unloyal, not loyal things that I've ever seen in my life.

It was literally the most loyal, unloyal thing, Andy. In my life. I guess what we've spent 10 minutes trying to get drilled down to is that you felt maybe betrayed by your friend who you brought onto the show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And someone was like, well, it wasn't that serious. It was a joke, like my marriage.

And he's like, okay, fine. But that's how she took it. And I'm just understanding where she came from. Okay, well, Sarah, oh, Lisa's like, I agree with Brooks. Okay, so then Andy's like, Sarah, Stassi on Facebook says, oh, guess what, I've been uncancelled Basic bitch summer I was surprised to hear the words vagina and cut fitness being thrown around so lightly in Dubai What was your reaction? Are you afraid to send these people to prison?

Are you gonna send these people to prison after you sent your maid to prison for having a Miller light in your bedroom? Yes, or no? Also, she adds, it's my fucking birthday. So, okay, great. And Sarah's like, it was too much, Andy. It was just too much. I mean, it was three or four episodes of Tallinn's Vagayjay, and that became the rising star of the show. You know what I mean? I mean, if that wanted to have women empowerment seminars, it probably could charge about $10,000 ahead, in which case I would be business partners with the Vagajay. And by the way, do you see me saying it in any other scenes?

The only vagina that gets mentioned is Sergio. So Andy's like, no, Brooks, I want to get into your state of mind. Okay, for the first half of the season, you would open a business six months earlier. Yeah. And you're working night and day at the business. Yeah. And you're raising your boy alone. Yeah. I guess that what I'm trying to do is I'm trying to give you your your your excuses ahead of time. You're supposed to take all this regurgitate into a monologue. So we have some things to edit together what's called a television show. See what's supposed to happen is that you're supposed to say these things and explain why

you were drunk and why you got into a fight with your best friend. See you're supposed to say I was so stressed and it was just that in that moment I needed you to be there for me and instead I felt like you left me for Caroline Samberg so you want to take that from the top. And it's basically like, so do you think the way that you were taking in alcohol was not beneficial to you? It's basically like, so were you a drunk or not?

And she's like, okay, okay, okay. So that's what we're getting to, okay. Well, obviously, no, I'm not proud of the way I behaved while I was drinking, all right? I need to gauge how much alcohol that I actually consumed. Okay, well, how do you think the other women saying you're drinking was partly to blame for your behavior?

She goes, well, listen, I think that they said I was alcoholic, which is actually ridiculous, Eddie. That is actually ridiculous. I mean, look, you can't even do 12 steps in Dubai. It's so hot out, the most you can do is four. So- No one makes it through 12 without falling over from eating sausage.

That's funny. deals for. So no one makes it through 12 without falling over from eating sauce. So then Lisa's like, actually, Brooks is she's actually lightweight, like one drink and she just starts slurring. And I am like, Yeah, I guess you can have you can have four drinks and you're lightweight. Is that what it is? And then okay, well, Tilly, and you've been friends with her for 10 years. Do you think it's unfair to call her a drunk? Okay, you know what? I do not think that Caroline is an alcoholic. You know who's an alcoholic? Marissa from Hillstone,

because you gotta be drunk to reject me and Ross. Listen, we both love to have a good time. And I'm sorry, I'm sorry that I said that you're an alcoholic, Brooks. Okay. Do I think that you can be messy? I do. Do I think that you're an alcoholic? I don't. Are my earrings hitting me on the cheeks because I'm shaking my head so hard for no reason? They are. You know what, Brooks? You can mess up your life and drink and drive badly and also push away all your friends

without even the use of alcohol. So no, you're not an alcoholic. And so it's like, I even told her, don't drink because once you drink, you don't look good on camera. I'm just like, yeah, Sarah said, one drink's okay for you, but once we pass on one, then that's not good, we don't like it. Mandy goes, apparently the producers told you that too.

She goes, oh yeah, they did. Right, that's not good, we don't like it. Mandy goes, apparently the producers told you that too. She goes, oh yeah, they did. Yeah, they did. Right, Bethany Frankel. Ha ha ha. I know, I was like, well, I guess Bravo's regulating, but yeah, you're right, maybe they are doing that for Bethany, or maybe they're doing it

because they're in Dubai, and it's like, you know. Yeah, there's that too. Don't want to get shut down. Don't want to be all in jail. But I took it how you did too. That there's probably like, Well, yeah, we don't want people drinking too much. Am I right? Wink. Well, you know, Lisa, you told me on Watch Rapids Live that Brooks needs to dial it down. What did you mean by that? Well, I mean, I was commenting on the whole thing with Celine,

like the see you next Tuesday, the hoes, all that thing. Like it was just a little bit too much. Okay, well, that's good to know. Well, here's one tied from- Four from- What? Oh, sorry, I was gonna help you out there. No, mine run dry over here.

You talk about your collar. Okay, sure. Four from Skin says, I love Sarah, but Brooks's behavior doesn't get a pass just because she was stressed. Now, what do you say to that? And as a non-drinker, is it ever hard for you to be around the ladies when they're drinking heavily, Sarah? It's like, no, you know what? It's hard for me to be around them when they drink heavily, yes. And every time Brooks does anything, everyone calls me, you know, they're like,

have you seen Brooks's behavior? You know what, I'm not Brooks's mom. I'm not her mom, but that's it. But if I were her mom, I would say, Brooks, watch out. There's like men in a van outside and they want to abduct you. Don't have nightmares tonight, by the way. So now we hear about Brooks's healing journey.

And he's like, did you have more than one session? And Sarah answers, no. And Sambury goes, actually, she tried to sue the healer, Andy. I never sued a healer. And she's like, no, but you asked for your money back. I was like, only Brooks would sue a healer. I'll get rough. Did you hear that rough? Rough. This is literally hilarious. He's like, okay, but she didn't sue a healer. Oh, get rough. Did you hear that? Ruff, ruff, you're gonna sue a healer, ruff. This is literally hilarious. It's like, okay, but she didn't sue a healer.

And Brooks is like, asking for a refund is not a lawsuit. I said, I want to refund you fucking phony, or I'm gonna fucking take you to court and take all of your goddamn money. Do you understand? Do you see that in your future, you fucking buying ass psychic bitch?

They said that was the first time they'd been asked for a refund in 30, 20 years, something like that. I mean, do you know how many facelifts it's been since they've had to issue a refund? And Brooke said that she wanted a refund because she didn't go back after one session. Girl, you spent your whole season saying you were spiritually healed. Spiritually healed people do not expect refunds for something that they just flaked out on. Yeah, exactly. So, and he was like, oh, okay. You know who else doesn't do that?

Like, trillionaires or whatever she's pretending she is on this show. People who are like, oh, yeah, I just flew private here for fun, yeah. But you couldn't pay your healer her hundred dollars, come on. Well, Marsh from Mallow says, you recently claimed Brooks that

Caroline's friend Michael is her sugar daddy and allegedly pays for her mortgage bills and clothing and everything. How do you know this? And she goes, Well, okay, so okay, so Stan Brady's group of friends were all at the land this and with the royal and we're on and Michael was getting wasted. He's he's real alcohol. You know, anyway, I Ion and Michael was getting wasted. He's a real alcoholic, you don't know what I'm talking about. So anyway, Ion called me and she was like, Michael's drunk ass literally just said

that he pays all of his standards bill, he's sick of Sergio, but don't say anything. She actually didn't even mention anything to me, but he repeated it again, so that's what I found out about. And Lisa's like, oh, I remember back in the day too, you ran into him at the main, and he also said that to you then. And they're like, yeah, well, you know, he wasn't happy that Sergio was stuck in the house and you guys were fighting and they're, you know, kind of all going, discussing this. And Ayan's like, yeah. And then he told me, you know what, I need them to leave

because I'm tired of paying for the house, the maid and the food and the stuff like that. That's what he said. He did. He cannot afford to pay his life. Dubai is expensive. And Stamber is like, nobody pays my life except my parents. And they owe it to me, frankly. My parents, let's be honest, some of those nannies in the brown uniforms.

So listen, the way that Michael said it to me, he said he made a poor joke about paying my maid and my bills because I overstayed my welcome. Just like the people that they're bringing in, these people, they're everywhere. There's nothing to do with them. They've completely changed Springfield. There was a pipeline here. Now there's no pipeline there. And now there's a keystone taking things from Russia to Germany. Can you believe it? I think you've switched to the debate again.

I'm sorry. The point is that people literally just shriveled up and dropped out of me during that. People should not over say they're welcome like those two or three sort of smaller type of people in my kitchen. Don't you learn those your kids? Oh, yes They should I've just gathered up my ovaries and put them in my purse Andy I'm so very dried up and over everything. I think those were were those originals actually whatever I don't care They need to get to work. So So, um, Brooks is like, What even is this? I don't know.

Sorry, I'm not high. Okay, so, um, she talks about how she has multiple businesses. I do so many things. I just don't bring my businesses onto the show. Um, I'm sorry, can we get a follow-up here? Which is, what the fuck is your business? And why is it a secret? I need to know your business, please.

So Andy's like, and did you get a big settlement from your ex? And she goes, of course I got money. To look stupid to you. Yes, of course. I mean, look at me. I'm not like Brooks where the only thing I get out of my divorce is someone to fix a toilet

by jamming it into the ground. I got money, lots and lots of money. So, Andy's like, well, you responded to Brooks' claim saying that Brooks was talking about herself. Who's paying her bills? Well, I do believe that Brooks works really hard at having other people pay her bills. But, like, at the same time, she's a single woman with... ...men. pay her bills. But like, at the same time, she's a single woman with... men. And Brooks is like, that bad, that bad, that bad. You know who my ex is. You know how long we were together. They say, they'll say bad. They'll say bad like that. Well, Talene, you

mentioned on Watch What Happens Live that Brooks dates a lot of wealthy men, and so we see that. And you later apologize online, and then we see a tweet and it says, so dot dot dot. Is that even ellipses? Are they just three periods put together? I'm serious. Listen, I made an inappropriate jokes about at Caroline Dubai last night on Watch What Happens. And this was generally meant in good fun. I mean, calling people whore is usually just a sweet thing that we do in our neighborhood. You know what I mean? So I don't know why anybody's so upset about it.

And if it went too far, I sincerely apologize. Here's to a great season. And for the record, sarcasm is my love language. It's my love. Also, you know what's my love language? Giving me a table when I come to your restaurant. You know what? Sarcasm is my love language, but unfortunately I said that sarcastically, which means it's actually's my love language, giving me a table when I come to your restaurant. You know what, sarcasm is my love language, but unfortunately I said that sarcastically,

which means it's actually not my love language. I don't appreciate it. So Andy's like, well, what do you mean you, why did you feel the need to apologize? Well, that was a poor choice of words to say that you sleep with wealthy men. You don't, you sleep with poor men too. So do you guys, you know,

but do guys do give you cash and buy you stuff Well, yeah, well, I mean why wouldn't my boyfriend give me cash and buy me and stuff. Okay, so let's just don't grow on trees How dare you suggested I take money from bed that I sleep with I take money from bed that I sleep with what's wrong with that? I take money from men. I'm in committed sleeping relationships with I drink money from men I'm in committed sleeping relationships with. And then she says, oh, and Tullien goes, but in Bali, you were talking about Shrek saying this is like your sugar daddy. She goes, I never slept with that guy. We see unseen footage of them in a van and Brooks is on FaceTime with Tullien calling

or she's she's on FaceTime with someone and she's like, oh yeah, I'm talking to this guy. And then she's saying, oh yeah, this guy talks about how he makes six figures a month and he flies me private and he gets me a nice bag every two weeks. And then Andy goes, wait, you were with someone that you referred to as Shrek? And she goes, he was just so ugly, Andy, he was so ugly. I was never with him.

So does that make it worse? I mean, you're just calling a, Andy, he was so ugly. I was never with him. So does that make it worse? I mean, you're just calling a guy ugly and then taking his money. Does this make you a better person? I'm not understanding what the argument is here because this almost makes you sound more horrible, at least in the other situation, you were being nice to the guy.

This is just being a dick to a guy on national TV and taking his money. You know what? It's not okay for you guys to say that she sleeps around with different men. Okay, what you really should have said is she sleeps around with a lot of different men. Okay, don't undersell it.

I just love the whole, how dare you? I am totally just flirting with ugly guys for their money. Yeah. How dare you? So then, Andy says, did he buy you stuff? And she says nothing. And so you've just said in that clip that he was flying you private and getting you a nice bag every two weeks, but whatever. So I don't like bullshit. Because look at me. I'm Sarah, someone who's so not about

bullshit. I can't wait to talk about my very real relationship with Akeen. Anyway, honestly, Lisa, you did say that about her too. And this goes, what? And Ayan's like, yes, you always say that you're sitting there acting like you never said that. Because when did I say that? She says things like that all the time. The horrible things that they both have said about each other. It's like rough. I mean, this is absolutely wild. Because it is pretty funny that Brooks and Lisa, of all people, are now like besties. Yeah. It's like ridiculous.

And they just have nobody left, you know? And so Brooks is like, but you're a business. And she's like, Lisa, I feel sorry for you, Lisa, for what you're about to go through with her. I feel bad for you. I'm serious. And Andy's like, Lisa, for what you're about to go through with her. I feel bad for you. I'm serious. And Andy's like, Lisa, have you been saying the same stuff

that you're accusing others of saying? She's like, listen, I've heard things and I brought them up, but I would never bring it to this platform and do that to embarrass her. Andy, I call people whores in private. Well, Lisa, unfortunately, that's not gonna get you another season.

We are gonna need you to bring it to this platform and embarrass him. That's kind of the name of the game. Okay, I'm going to move forward. This year, a new housewife named Talene, that's me, Raph, emerged in the desert. And while she and her pal, Brooke, started off thick as thieves, accusations of begging, barring, and one girl lying, stealing or from the other led to quite the sandstorm between besties. Oh my God, I'm exhausted. Yeah. So basically they're like, wow, you're so seasoned, Talene. How does it feel to be

here? She's like, I had no idea what I was walking into. I just wanted to be myself. And I've just been so grateful for all the fans and all the responses that I've got I just really really appreciate it. A booth would be great Brooke Brooks, did you prepare to lean before she started? No, not really much preparation because it's lean those I never watch the house Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Sure as your Twitter name is Caroline Dubai really leaning into like hey guys, I'm on the the Housewives. Like, oh yeah. Oh yeah, I'm sure. As your Twitter name is Caroline Dubai, really leaning into like, hey guys, I'm on the Real Housewives. You walked into my house and said,

you gotta watch Beverly Hills. You were a fanatic. She tried to even get me through one episode. It's just not for me. I'm just not into the Housewives. Oh God, she's so foolish. I know. And I love it.

Why do I, usually it infuriates me when people lie to this degree. Because it's such a low state. Yeah, it's just not worth getting mad over. Yeah, I just think she's so funny. She's got such a charm about her. So Andy's like, so did she prepare you, Brooks? And Tulene's like, she wanted me to come in. And Sandra is like, and take me down. Say it. She goes, and take me down. Yeah, and say the thing about how she's gonna, she was using, she was using you to get to me.

She was using me. Wait a minute. You're doing the same thing to me right now. I'm richer than her. Okay, I'll allow it. She was trying, listen, she wanted me to come in and hate everybody. She wanted me to hate you and you and you and you and you.

Me? Yeah, you. There's a lot to on back there, Andy. Why are you pointing at the makeup lady? I'm running out of people that I'm supposed to hate. Okay, basically. And Andy's like, okay, well, Peanut from Butter said, you called Talena Hadidith a bird Ion.

What's up with that? She says, yes, I remember everybody when I called her hadith a bird hilarious. Yeah, I just asked that. OK, well, that led to a great segment. Let's move on. So has she grown on you since then? Well, I actually told her today to be hadith. So to lean Brooks called you after the Queen's dinner to say that Stanberry was talking

crap about you. What made you decide to fact check Brooks and call Stanberry? And she's basically like, oh my God, this is a pattern. It just kept happening. I get these calls from Brooks and I'm like, you know what? Let me just get everybody on the phone and talk it out. And Brooks was like, I actually defended her at that table. Those two walked away to talk. I mean, about a vagina privately, you're gonna have a private vaginal conversation when I've already initiated a public vaginal conversation. We were talking about vaginas on group texts and now you're going to talk about vaginas privately on a sun chair. This is how it works. Why come from Ali?

Yeah, but then Brooks, what you relate to me is, don't you get it, Tal? She doesn't like you, Tal. And she's like, no, no, no, that's noted to me is, don't you get it, Tal? She doesn't like you, Tal. And she's like, no, no, no, that's not what I said. It was nice of her to want to have that conversation alone without the pause. Brooks was like, but she said that if anybody talked about her during filming to tell her. And Tony's like, I never said that, but okay. So the next question is that Melissa, wait, Brooks. From Eatin' By, an illegal alien says, you started the season calling Talene,

one of your closest friends in Dubai, but the minute she challenged you, you lost it on her and said, you were done. Did you expect her to just blindly follow you? That's a big question. Let me add, ah, ah, ah. And Brooks was like, no, not blindly follow me, but you know, there's some basis of loyalty there.

You know what I mean? All right, well, Sarah, Michael from J-Fox said that you defended Brooks in the desert after her fallout with Talene. When you watch back that dinner argument, was it, is it what you expected to see? And Sarah's like, in the desert, I was telling Brooks to apologize to Talene.

Yeah, because I was clearly coming from a good place telling you that, and I wanted to move forward, and you said, there is no moving forward. Yeah, but we saw Talene and Brooks finally make up at the ION Beauty event only here that Brooks wasn't apologizing for how she treated Talene, but rather calling her a beggar. Yeah, well apparently 105 times you said on Entertainment Tonight I said, please, please,

please, can I be on your show? That's what you said, and furthermore you then started going da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah to be on the show? My vagina was. You know, my vagina was on camera before I was.

My vagina has its own testing. Wait, what am I talking about? Damn it, Brooks, you've tricked me into this. Listen, you know, I was like, should I be on the show? Will being on the show make it easier for me to get a reservation at Hailstone and Kirby? Apparently not. But for you to press, go to press and say, I begged you, I begged you 105 times. I don't

beg friends for shit. She knows that. She knows that. Are you smoking a cigarette in here? Yeah. What the fuck? You want a piece of me, Andy? Shut the fuck up. Well, Mom Talk, can it survive this? Says, isn't the point of bringing someone into your friend group so that she integrates with your other friends? Like, did you just expect to lean to be your mouthpiece? Oh, this is a big question right here. This is good. This is a good one, yeah.

And Brooks is just like, no, I don't want her to speak for me. And Ayan goes, yeah, that was set up this season. And she goes, and Sarah's like, oh, you bitch. You'll be arrested. So Brooks is like, if a person's coming onto a show as a friend of mine, I'll expect for them to be kind of half my back. That's fair, that's fair. Well, you know what though?

I have texts of Brooks saying, oh my God, Stanbury just put three people forward. We need to get you on the show. So there was a motive there. Oh gosh, and it just keeps, they kind of keep going on circles around this. And Andy's like, Teline Tree from Zepetide on Twitter says, Teline used Brooks to get on the show and then flipped on her. I mean, they just keep going on and on with this thing. It's so stupid. Brooks was trying to start a fight with Stanbury. It was a stupid vagina fight. It went nowhere.

Let's not make the next five years of our lives about this. Please. Yeah, this was this one on the very long time. So then Andy starts asking Brooks about Stanbury's housewarming, which is where the big fight was and how she showed up with Sage and brought a guest who was like not even invited. And people were like not happy about that. And you know, someone on Twitter was like, I would have kicked out Brooks the moment I saw Sage in her hand. Like, what were you thinking, Caroline? Or what were you thinking, Caroline? Yeah. And someone on Twitter is like, why does Brooks thinks that she's the one doing apology to Lulu? She came in with an agenda to start the fight and Brooks is like, I don't care. There's my answer Yeah, okay. Well, okay. Well, do you own the fact that you came in kind of rearing to go and Sam

Baird is like yes you at a hundred and eyes her guns her guns were blazed. Yes, so They're acting like this is the first time this has ever happened on a Real Housewives show. Like, I can't believe you should have been a party ready to go after someone. Yeah. So then it turns into the fight, the fight with Raph. Dun, dun, dun. And Tolene's like, yeah, you know, my husband was actually trying to deescalate, you know. And Stambury is like, yeah, she had been poked quite a lot through the dinner and she did walk away. Now, that said, I don't know how you expect your vagina

to be out half the time and not expect to get poked. Do you know what I mean? And Brooks was like, I wasn't even talking to her. And Celine's like, oh, really, you weren't talking to me? You were talking to the air? Were you talking to the air? That was in my audition tape. I'm glad I finally got to use that one.

What, were you talking to the air? That was in my audition tape. I'm glad I finally got to use that one. What? Were you talking to the air? So good. Put it on a coffee mug, Amby. I was being poked. Okay. Should I have said that about your husband not being there? Or where is your husband? No. And for that, I do take accountability. I am sorry for highlighting that you have no husband and that there's no one in your life right now and that you are a lonely person and that I am in a good relationship with Roth while you are in a sad relationship with a man who comes in to fix your toilet. I never should have mentioned that you have no husband, no husband whatsoever. I should take full accountability for highlighting that to America that you are lonely.

Yeah, and Stambury is like, well, I mean, I think Rafi had listened to it and listened to it. And to be honest, I can't believe he only got involved at the end. I mean, Brooks, you have a longer standing relationship with Raf than you do Teline. You call Rafi, you invited Rafi to your birthday party without Teline. You have that relationship with him. So he has every right to have that relationship and the clap back with you. I'm like, oh, look, I get that we're on each other's sides. No, man should be yelling at a woman anywhere really, like not in private either. But like that was gross. Rough is gross for that one. So Andy goes, oh, that's interesting. So Lisa's like, so he has every right to have

shouted at her. No, he didn't shout at her. Talene's like, he walked away. Lisa's like, no, I did not walk away. He said, I'm not doing this. And we see a flashback of Raph that whole moment. He did both. Yeah, and so then- He did both of those things. He yelled at her and then he walked away.

So Talene- They're both right. So Talene is like, she's like, Lisa, you even admitted to me that you didn't really see what was going on. And this is like, well, I didn't see how I started, but I did see. She was, well, you were looking for a moment and you inserted yourself just like Marissa at Hillstone. Oh, gosh. So they keep going on and on.

And then Andy's like, you know, I understand the male female dynamic about this fight, but if you were old buddies, I mean, doesn't that take some steam out of it? And she's like, no. And he's like, what? Excuse me. Are you serious right now? We're literally not even in the right city right now. And Brooks is like, have I ever argued with Roth like that? And Tony goes, excuse me.

After my party off camera camera you didn't argue with Rob are you kidding where their cameras or weren't cameras are we are we confirmed that was you kidding me that wasn't with Raffy that was with you that was with you and Raffy you were spitting in his face and there were people there I should I didn't spit on his face after after the see you next Tuesday thing, this woman's a liar. You should start working at Hellstone and try to book reservations there, because you'd fit in perfectly.

They just start calling each other liars over and over again. And Abby's just like, you know what? I have to say, I'm the best in Russia. I do the best Russia. You know, even Russia themselves says, you're best in Russia. I do the best Russia. You know, even Russia themselves says you're a great Russia, you know, and I'm just here to stand up for fertilization. So we'll see you next time. And that is it for part one of the Dubai reunion. We'll be back next week for part two, and we'll see how it goes but fun times thanks everyone for being here don't forget to check out those archives on our website and we'll catch you on

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