Watch What Crappens - #364 Married2Med: Closing Mouths
Episode Date: January 6, 2017Married to Medicine enjoys a lovely day at the spa where Toya gets to tell everyone what they need to fix. It goes really well. Subscribe at http://www.patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens for bonus... episodes, ringtones, and live group video chat parties. Also, check out Ronnie’s new TrashTalkTV RHOBH Audiobook podcast at tttv.podbean.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Hello, and welcome back to watch what crapens for Merry to Mendocene.
I'm Ronnie Kerrum from the Roseprix Bachelor podcast and the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills
Audio Book podcast and I'm here with Ben Madrelka of the Beside Blog and the Banner Blender.
Hello Ben.
Oh hi Ronnie, how are you doing on this fine Friday afternoon? I love a Friday girl. Yeah, we made it. We did it. We did it.
The ending of our first week of five days a week. I know it's exciting. It's gonna
feel amazing. It feels amazing. Me too. So. No.
Is it bad if I say that I have stock public domain music from Ladies of London in my head?
Is that bad?
No, how can you not?
I mean, ever since I've had it,
it's like the same girl making all the songs.
It just makes it so much better.
It really does.
It's Friday, it's Friday, but now with
his Friday, Friday is the end of the week. Cause I'm a girl.
I don't care about the other days of the week. I only care about
Friday, Friday, Friday, and by Friday, I mean Monday.
I like that you make her all deep at the end. Just like wait a
second. The song poetry. She always has a little
a little something at the end. Fra days the day, Fra days the day for me to wish it worth this day.
Girls like fun and they like Fra days, but guess what I am a girl. Girls like fun and they like Friday's but guess what I'm a boy
Well, this is not ladies of London
This is ladies of marriage to medicine and what ladies they are guys what ladies they are
When I think of this show, I just think of one word lady lady
So why did I write Teresa at the vent? Oh, I'm on the wrong-merry de medicine girl
I got married to medicine Houston. I was like what's Teresa doing on this show who to Reese and what is she?
And who's Teresa on marriage medicine Houston?
The trans general lady who has her own gyms.
What?
Isn't her name?
Isn't her name Teresa?
She's like, yeah, this place is great.
Yeah, I forgot about her.
Anyway.
So anyway, Houston, sorry, we'll get you another time.
Well, we already got to Houston.
If you remember from earlier this week, oh, yeah, I forgot.
It's over now. Bye Houston.
It's over. It's done. So anyway,
so the marriage medicine. So by the way, we understand the new episode of marriage medicine is airing tonight.
This is like a catch up to remind you of what happened last week to get you ready for tonight's episode.
So we open up with the usual montage of things going around town and land as usual stuff.
Jack is heading to the hospital because she's tied.
She's not enough hours in the day and all that stuff.
And then it's like leasing a cold doing something like,
you will the Bentley.
I don't know too many 12 year olds that have a Bentley.
As long as you never lie to me.
As long as you say I can have a baby and promise
that your father loves me and all women. Not men. I don't know if that was. Do you
want a Bentley or don't you want a Bentley? Just tell me the truth. So but
crazy as heavenly writing on the mirror and lipstick or some shit
Love and there is the power of the town
Yeah, okay heavenly that's not gonna work. Okay. She pledges not to curse more
She's like I'm not gonna have for fat. It is much. Okay. Well, we'll see how long that lasts
Not her I'm on the journey of being a better person and these are tests. I'm like, okay, well, we'll see how long that lasts Not very good. She tells us I'm on the journey of being a better person and these are tests. I'm failing
Leasing a cool potential. She's perfect. She called me drunk
Maybe I just shouldn't say anything to her at all like maybe you should stop thinking of things like that
Because I think she did those things because you told her her husband is a cheating gay guy
Yeah, so you, cause an effect.
Cause an effect.
I'm afraid that her journey to being a better person
is with Southwest Airlines.
Just a lot of stops and bad jokes.
And everyone's mad at the end, but they don't know why.
I'm furious.
Like heaven.
And they didn't really save as much money
as they thought they would have.
Now this show, we didn't cover last week, we talked about it on our bonus episode, but
we didn't do a full recap.
And I think I talked about this already, but just this clip of how it opened saying previously
on and and toyah going off about Janice, not understanding.
Janice show me that she doesn't know shit about what Toya and her family need.
Well, she's mad because Janice didn't know the brand of the stove.
And it's this huge like kitchen grade, like professional kitchen grade stove.
And Toya's mad because it doesn't say frigid air.
I just love this fucking show.
It's hilarious to me.
Yeah, I, well, I uh my feelings about the show have changed over time. I loved it the first
season and now my feelings have changed. So anyway, so um so meanwhile, Quad is now making
breakfast while her nephew is sitting in the corner.
I mean, for some reason, I feel like now all Quad seems to involve her making breakfast
in her little kitchen.
Her big kitchen, I should really say.
It's a big kitchen with their little island on it, but she's just always making breakfast.
She's telling the baby the baby's eating Cheerios off of his little high-chair thing as
babies are want to do.
And she's like, now baby,
you don't got to stuff them on your mouth at the same time,
once at a time.
That is a mouth, not the anal cavity of a turkey.
Where does quad come up with this shit?
Look at that.
How did you get to the anal cavity of a turkey
from a baby eating a Cheerio?
You know?
I love the leaves that she makes.
Yeah, exactly.
And why would she expect the child to know what an anal cavity is?
Pressing questions, pressing questions.
So Dr. Gregory comes in and he's like wearing like all orange or something like that.
And they just, they start talking about,
I guess he had a birthday party
on the previous episode and they're just re-capping it
and everything.
And one of the things that happened was that Mariah and Aiden,
I guess they were invited
and yet they weren't actually welcome to the party
because I didn't watch the episode.
I was like, Christmas break,
I don't have to watch an episode of the show.
I'm taking the day.
Merry Christmas to me.
One thing that wasn't in the Bible, Jesus sitting around watching Mary
Demandison, okay?
Yeah.
So they were in events, they were talking about it, and I love Quad.
You know, whenever Quad is trying to be very serious,
she tries to use big words, because that gets her more authority
in what she's saying.
In fact, everyone in this show does it, to be honest.
You know, this is when they all say, well, what had it transpired was.
So, Quas were saying, yes, well, they were not prohibited
into the party.
Like that really makes no sense.
They actually were prohibited totally.
They were, well, maybe they don't get prohibited
and prohibited into something.
Maybe Sue is trying to use big words on the invitation
and that's why they were confused.
Sue is like, you are no longer prohibited
and becoming into my party.
Mariah is like, girl, that means I wasn't buying it.
Yeah, exactly.
If you're not prohibited into something,
that means you have free access.
I think that you're prohibited and permitted,
but I don't know.
And quads like, I don't go into parties
that I'm non prohibited from coming to.
Prohibition was a great time.
It meant that we could all drink all for years and years.
I don't know why people complain about Prohibition girl.
That's when the turkeys, cavities were getting stuffed and everybody was invited to everything.
It's like why do I always say Prohibition is like a palm tree on a cactus.
It's going to be prickly on a chance of rain
And Gregory's like can I have the baby yet?
It's like no Gregor. Okay, I'll go back to baby now. So now some Orion. Her husband and bed. Amoraz like
How are you? He's like, oh good. I mean, you know, it was an exciting night. She goes oh
Not being rejected from a party. That was an exciting night. She goes, oh, and that being rejected from a party. That was not exciting.
Like I'm like, I'm like, I'm sorry. No, no, go ahead. No, I just like that. He was like, he's like, yeah, he's like, uh, no,
I mean, hooks never get rejected. Sorry, honey. Hooks, hooks do not get rejected. I'm like, oh, yeah,
well, then why are you sitting here in your bed doing nothing, talking about how you're rejected?
Moriah looks like a crazy vampire with those contacts too.
They just look creepy.
Yes, I noticed it.
They look like horror show like on Halloween when people give
themselves like zombie eyes, they're yellow or something.
They're not right.
Yeah, I tried to get a screen grab of it.
And then I was like, I'm always in my time with this.
What's the disease that gives you yellow eyes?
John does.
John does.
Yeah, she looks John does.
Maybe that's why they wouldn't let her in.
She's like, Quads like no one with illness.
No cast numbers of toilet.
So Mariah is on mad and then Mariah is just to fight, you know,
Mariah is another one who just refuses to accept that she's a total bitch on
wheels and tries to ruin everybody's lives.
And then she's like, what I do.
And she's, uh, she's a total bitch on wheels and tries to ruin everybody's lives and then she's like, what I do? And she's sitting there, she goes, well, Ms. Qua, she didn't want me at her party, because she knew I would be a bigger person, and that's not how Qua operates.
Like, Qua was afraid that you were going to be a bigger person, so she didn't let you in.
Listen to yourself. Yeah, they're both awful, because you know, you know, this feud has been going on for several years.
And I never know who's side to take.
And I'm realizing that I just really dislike them both.
These days I'm actually more Mariah side, which is shocking because I say, Hey, Mariah,
but I think that Mariah actually, I feel like Mariah is actually trying to grow even
though she can't, but I feel like she's trying.
I don't think Quad is trying.
I think Quad is petty and she's, she sees herself as the trying to grow even though she can't, but I feel like she's trying. I don't think quad is trying. I think quad is petty and she sees herself as
the star of the show and she's making good TV. And in fact, their whole feud, I think
it's been the downfall of this show because it was a feud that started at some dinner
that happened in between seasons. And it was a feud that was based off of like, who's
more famous? So it's bullshit.
It's bullshit stuff that no one cares about and they've maintained this feud for now like three
years. And I just don't think that the interest is very strong in it. Like it's just not a good feud.
Yeah, it's a feud that started in the caros like a long time ago and it's like drag.
Just keeps on going and they keep on resolving it and they fight again and
resolving like no one cares if it takes up a lot of air time but it is it does
crack me up still because quite does things like this or I guess now the icing
on the cake was when miss quad left cash at the door for transportation That was weird. Quads like tell them they are no longer prohibited.
And I've left them a dollar for an Uber.
Like nice.
So funny.
You can't tell a peacock to take a bus to the Grand Canyon.
Got a little money for it.
And Mariah says, you got to be a messy bitch who ain't used to a thing.
I never know what you're saying, but it's hilarious either way.
So then Quad is trying to justify this whole thing.
And I think this is why I get irritated with Quad because she plays innocent.
She's like, listen, I didn't want, I didn't want Mariah to feel humiliated or left out.
I just wanted to focus on my husband's party.
It's like, can now you specifically
humiliated and left out mariah so if you didn't want to feel that way you would
not done any of those things
well mariah has decided now that
up over the antics
and so
she's mad now at all the ladies for not standing up and saying something
to her about her whatever and she's like why didn't some own say something
so now she's gonna try and uh... apparently in the last episode that we didn't want there was part
where Mariah and Simone were talking about their relationship which of course
involved quad two because that's how the show runs and quad ran up and started
yelling at them and had this big fit and she's like why wasn't some
moan disinvited from this power and so that's like her big thing now for this episode. So toa as Lori Ann Collins
calls her, toa toa income destroyer. Yeah. How shopping on the internet. Yeah. Yeah.
For a new house because they can't afford their $10,000 a month rental or whatever. Exactly. Now, Toya, I mean, you know, Toya just loves to go through money and Eugene is a smart man
He's sensible for what we can tell except he has a blind spot when it comes to Toya and
um, you know, he he wants to downsize something that they can afford and Toya's like, well, I don't know
We could go to small house like kids are not gonna like it and he's like, no
You brainwashed the kids because you complain so much about small like things being small and not being nice enough.
The kids are just going to follow that.
You know, kids are passed to parents and Toya goes, but you just call my kid a parrot.
She's so stupid.
She tells us that it grandly 3000 less than what we currently pay
I'm like you're going for an eight thousand dollar house. You are about to be jailed for non-payment of taxes
You do not need to be spending eight thousand damn dollars a month on the house you crazy bitch get a job
Well, I should there is a little bigger house because we go to big house
You can write off most or actually back up back to your address and you don't know anything and they owe you money
So that's what I shouldn't did
Well, I should have did
Jean
Jean took a bled back and whoa did I just call my kids two cans?
She's like here's my list of things on lead Eugene a neighborhood
backyard
Sidewalks and a closet because you know I got to have my clothes in the guest room best tacky
It's like but I can do it. She's like you could use the playroom
I just like the sidewalks are on her list. I know I know I like that too. I want sidewalks
Backyard. Oh, and it's got to be an $11,000 house. It looks exactly like the one we live in and I in fact
Should be the one we live in. And in fact, should be the one we live in. That's what I want.
Hmm. Poor thing. So Simone and her husband basically nothing, right? Except that they're
planning on going to Hawaii for their anniversary. And it's going to be a group trip. Because
that always did. Great idea. Great idea. Um, yes, that's basically what she's like in her
little, she got her little thing on her head and everything and she's confused about it as cell phone.
Her iPhone is a working right.
It was basically like nothing seen, but we learned that they're going on a couple's trip.
It's gonna be disaster.
And then just a little side scene, it's like a little baby scene, but Jackie has, Jackie's
with a patient and she's like, now what can we do to talk you into more babies?
And the lady goes, ah, no, shop be closed.
Oh, God. Jackie loves putting baby pressure on people.
She does. She's like projecting her baby fail
onto other people. It's so sad. Her favorite movie must be Junior.
She's like, look, this is the movie where men cannot babies.
It's more babies. More babies.
Now, if I could impregnate Arnold Schwarzenegger, I would.
So Moriah and Simone go to lunch.
Where they're served by Shade.
I'm fairly certain it was Shade who was serving them.
I was like, wow, I mean, I know Shade hasn't had a song
on the radio in a while, but now she's a waitress in Atlanta.
Now, Simone is doing that thing with Mariah that she does when someone is just wrong.
It's like the same voice she uses when she tells somebody they have cancer all over their body, you know. She's like, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
She puts her lips out and like makes that very serious face and just nods and goes, mm, a lot. MRI is like, now, could you tell me what I did to that girl
referring to Quad, which,
yes, I mean, you've seen this show
probably 19 times in episode, Mariah.
You know what you did, Quad.
So here's, so this is where I'm gonna say something
that's, I'm gonna say, quote unquote,
controversial because it's not really controversial
because we're only talking about marriage and medicine.
But they're talking and Simone mentions that her dad died.
And I think this is the first time it was a dress on the show.
I don't think it was last, last episode I'm assuming because there seem to be a lot of
exposition here.
But Simone announces that they found her dad's body.
He died and it was tough and sad.
And Mariah is genuinely rattled by it.
You can see, at this moment, she's not doing her shady thing.
And she's like, oh my God, I think actually being a very good friend in that moment, being
really concerned, whatever.
And then a Simone tells the story about, yeah, I went to Nashville, I went with Jackie,
and I went with Quad.
I honestly feel like the look I'm right face, that was, she looked genuinely hurt by that.
I don't think that was a moment of her acting
or her being petty.
She, I think that Mariah actually feels
very close with Simone, and once you heard that,
Simone brought Jackie and Quad for this thing
to find the father, I think she looked genuinely,
genuinely hurt, and that's why I think I am actually
starting to move
over more to Mariah's side because I feel,
I feel like she's more hurt than Quad is.
Does that make sense?
Yeah, but she caused so much shit that she got roasted,
you know, she ended up being ousted.
And so she's been trying to work her way in,
but then even when she works her way back in,
she causes all this shit.
And then she doesn't get ousted, they let her back.
But part of, first of all, if someone's dad is found, you know that's in all the blogs,
that's, I mean, I didn't read them because I didn't know until recently, and I feel stupid.
So, but that, the cast members know, it's like Lee Savander Pump saying on Beverly Hills.
She's like, I hadn't heard about your mother until last week.
Like, yes, you did.
Yes, you did.
It's an all, I know you got a Google alert
about your show coming in, like you knew.
So to me, I mean, and generally I'm more cynical anyway,
but to me she's crying because not only did she not get
to be in the scene where Simone's crying about her dad,
which I know sounds terrible,
but she also found out that Simone has chosen to shoot with other people throughout the season
and didn't tell her, you know? Yeah, I mean, that's probably it too. And I did write a note that
Mariah looks really hurt, although it's really not about her. But I don't know, I feel like when Mariah
left the show or was out of the show for a little bit and continues to be just like a friend of.
I do feel like she maybe has grown a little bit. I just feel like there's some introspection there
that's not there with Quad. I feel like there's something that like because now also Quad has
a pattern of behavior. You know, she had her stupid stupid fight with Lisa Nicole, which is one of
the stupid fights, although it was entertaining. But it was one of those things where you start to
realize, wait a second, here I was always on team Quad
and I've always hated Mariah,
but now I'm realizing Quad is actually ridiculous.
Yes.
And you know what, I maybe have to rethink my stance on Mariah.
So I'm gonna state where I'm moving,
the needle is moving more towards Mariah for me
of these two stupid ladies.
I feel like it's choosing fights in a chicken fight.
You can't, like, they're both, they're both poultry.
Mm-hmm.
Like, I just have no, I don't even know who to bet on.
You know, they're both ridiculous to me.
They're two dumb hens.
I'm like, one of them's gonna get pumbled to death by the end.
And I really don't care, but I'm really gonna enjoy watching it happen.
Well, I think Toya has the right idea by putting together a passive aggressive spa day
to treat the women and call them out.
That is straight up aggressive.
Yeah, that was aggressive.
So she tells Eugene her plan that she's going to treat everyone to a spa day for the things
that they need.
So for instance, she's like, well, you know, like at least in the cool fashions are like,
you know, not the most expensive fabric and you know, they make it look really fat. So, you know, like the least Nicole fashions are like, you know, not the most expensive fabric
And you know they make it look really fat. So, you know, I'm gonna get to a trade though. And that I loved that that
You know when she said that not the nicest fabrics and you know how her abs are falling out
They flash back to least Nicole wearing that stupid red outfit with the pom-poms on it and please Nicole goes
This is our new collection it's called
the return of the lady that just for some reason that just maybe crack up that you would call
her stupid dress the return of the lady that's like when stripper like it's Christmas and strippers
are all in there like Santa whore outfits it's like red fur coming around her mommy bump or whatever
Red for coming around her mommy bump or whatever. And even as classy.
And, uh, Toria, what was her next one?
Well, she says, I know she goes, I have friends, have places.
I know the manager of a nail salon.
That's like literally not a friend of the high place.
Yeah.
So then the conversation, you know, Eugene is like, don't do this.
It's aggressive.
You're going to start fights.
It's like, no, it's just honest.
It's just honest feedback.
I would want it.
He's like, don't insulting.
It's insulting.
If she goes, I don't lead to negativity, Eugene.
He's like, but you need my money.
So, um, at least sidewalks from you.
That's what I mean.
I just want a good sidewalk. My favorite book in the whole world is a show full of steam.
With a sidewalk ends. Um, what does it end, Eugene?
Well, their conversation ends up moving into, uh, she's telling Eugene.
She's like, well, I really wish that you would appreciate Simone offering to pay for
our trip to Hawaii
and then they cut back to Simone Suttles ever.
They're all sitting, it's all the cast sitting around in a huge circle.
And she's like, now, would you like us to pay for your trip to Hawaii?
We know that you're having trouble.
Look, it's a lot as possible.
And he's like, I don't need a hand out, okay?
And she's like, okay, well, my hand is out.
So if you need it, he's like, no, I really don't need a hand out okay and she's like okay well my hand is out so if you need it
He's like no yeah, I really don't and and I love how you know, this is like really insulting to Eugene
As a doctor who can't approach to Hawaii
And I just love that toy as responses. You'll just love to exote your manhood
I'm like I think you mean a search your manhood
Not exert it.
You just love running it out.
Your manhood is like an egg on a sidewalk messy.
Smelling.
I don't want my kids running around back.
What you should've did was prohibit your manhood from exerting itself.
Now it's going to throw up.
I can't feel for him not affording Hawaii.
I mean, you're looking to pay $8,000 a month and you can't buy a damn Southwest ticket.
Yeah, well, yeah, exactly.
He's got toio.
That's the problem.
This is not news.
This has been going on since season one.
The woman is spending all his money.
Yep.
And she tells them she goes, at least let them pay for the plane ticket.
Oh, wait, when she say, at least let them pay for the room
and we'll pay the plane ticket
because that's the most expensive part.
He's like fine and she goes, oh no, she goes,
let them pay for the room.
They owe us that after the last time or whatever.
So she goes, okay, fine.
She goes, good, well now I can go shopping
and spend that money on new clothes.
That's a good toy, huh?
She's like, he's like,
dammit, that's what I was talking about.
She goes,
whoa, we saved him money.
We saved him money
because Simone's gonna pay for it.
In fact,
Simone's gonna pay for our house now.
Great.
We're gonna live in Simone's east side house.
We'll look at Compass.
She got two houses.
So next is Jackie and her husband. I don't really have
a lot to say about them either. Yeah, I just, I mean, I said Curtis is annoyed about something
because basically they're finally moving into this house and she painted something and he's
annoyed now. At first when the scene began I was like, more stupid drama that we don't really
care about. But by the end of the scene, I was like, uh, more stupid, you know, drama that we don't really care about.
But by the end of the scene, I was like, you know, this is actually very tense.
This is, this does, this actually feels like a real fight that they're having.
Um, and it's a real problem.
He is like ready to divorce her ass.
Yeah.
And she's like, do you like the kitchen?
Do you like it?
And he's like, well, I didn't agree to paint this kitchen.
She's like, my question to you, do you like this kitchen?" He's like, he's like, you know what I would like. It's
to spend time with my wife. He's like, I do spend time with you. He's like, you've got
a charity here and this there and you won't even talk to me. You walk in on the phone and
then you sit at your computer and do your charts. And she goes, I sit right next to you while I do those charts.
I actually, well, it's funny.
I see both sides.
I actually side with Dr. Jackie on this because she is a doctor and she is ambitious.
And that's, I think, probably always been part of her personality.
And he, that's what he signed up for.
And I think it's great that she's doing this stuff.
And I do think that like if she's sitting next to him doing the charts, I think that's valuable. I think
doing work next to your loved one, you're still together, you know, you can still make
comments to each other, you know, I like that. But I do understand what he's saying, which
is that, listen, I'm not opposed to you working, but you just keep on adding stuff onto your
plate. And it's to the point where you are, but you just keep on adding stuff onto your plate.
And it's to the point where you are, it's getting in the way of us.
And normally this is the time when we normally say something like, well, she's paying the
bills, so you better shut up.
But I don't think that's what he's complaining about.
I think he's just like, I want time with you.
And I think he wouldn't mind just leaving and getting a small house for himself.
He can pay the bills.
He's got a steady job at the high school.
Yeah. And she doesn't get it. She's like, I moved into this himself. He can pay the bills. He's got a steady job at the high school. Yeah.
And she doesn't get it.
She's like, I moved into this house.
He got his way.
I don't know.
But he just wants to spend time with you.
I mean, that's kind of cute.
Yeah.
It is actually very sweet.
But I mean, like boring.
Boring.
Cute.
Well, because they're like the two adults on the show.
So, you know, they have boring drama because they're adults.
And I like that on the commercials that keep showing.
They're like, married to medicine is getting hot.
And she's like, you have this respected me again.
It's like Jackie, the one time she loses it.
They show it on every commercial now.
Yeah, exactly.
So next up is Kuaad, Quang Brick.
Make breakfast again.
She was. Yeah, she's always making like bacon or oatmeal.
She's like, the heavens have opened up on it and the gates are there and Quentin walked through
those gates and was unprohibited from getting the job, honey. This is actually her exact
quote because I wrote it down. goes yes God miss Quad honey the heavens
Open up their gates honey Quentin got a job on it. I'm like that actually made very little sense
Maybe the last part did but yes God miss Quad honey
That's like little I don't I don't and then I don't know. Yes, God, God, God, miss Quar and honey
Quar of sale the quar of the quad of God squad. Yes, God
Lord, I'm gonna run everything about dad Kelly dad
So she's telling him now she gets into her like IRS suit or whatever, her IRS lady suit. And she's like, now, Quentin, what title?
What is your title?
And he's like, I'm installing cable.
She goes, is that a title?
And he's like, I'm the communications officer of Intel, of Spectrum cable.
She's like, nah, that's good.
Nah.
She then started selling him that he has to budget,
and I was getting so ready for her
to do some role-playing as a banker.
Okay, I'll be the banker.
Excuse me, Mr. Quentin.
Would you like a loan?
Yes, well, why do you need a loan?
What's your credit, Mr. Quentin?
You know she was dying to do some banker role-play.
She's like, now, Mr. Quentin,
I will give you $20, but you know
that's going to be another $2 chart on top of your banks, $3 chart.
Yes, Quad, this guy's hunting. This is like a eight-year-old.
Yes, Quad, financial lose.
By the way, the most exciting part of the scene for me was the fact that Quad had the
same spoon as I had in my childhood, a little spoon that looked like a scallop shell.
But I used to eat yogurt with.
I thought I was like, my childhood.
And it's quiet.
Imagine if you were raised by a quad.
And she's teaching him how to make a butter.
She's like, nah, we need a spend in budget so you can say this is not magic city and you
can make it rain.
You can't even make it drizzle.
Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just going to end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter
or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife.
And I'm Sydney Battle and we're the hosts of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each
episode explores a different iconic celebrity view from the buildup, why it happened, and
the repercussions.
What does our obsession with these feuds say about us?
We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and
Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows.
It's snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud.
But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon.
Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood.
How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully
crafted narrative designed to sell albums?
Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts.
You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wonder-Yah.
There's some precipitation coming through when it is not prohibited.
There's 9% chance of God on the squad ring coming down on your head, Drizzle Make It Rain
Magic Mac!
The only hell I care about is one say hell quad. Yes Lord.
So we get to say you can't bring an umbrella to enough fun. We get to the wellness spa and
Toya's like this is brutally honest spa day. I'm about to bring out all the character flaws and tell him look
So Moriah goes in first and
What is what did I write down sick boot? What does that mean? Oh because Moriah has a boot on because she remember She broke her leg her foot doing something she mentioned early in the season. I don't remember what it was
I like this more quadsling. I don't get but quad isn't here yet
Girl you got a sick boot like a fruit
hunting. Hannah you can only wear a boot in one place and that is at a table factory under the
best-eal-day celebrations. That was a hard one to get out from. I was like, I'm in a corner here.
I was like, I'm in a corner here.
It's weird. I don't know what I'm going to do. Uh, but still day works.
It worked.
Somewhere I live, and she's like, well, I can't believe that toy
I would even approach me after she's the one who started all this mess.
I'm like, uh, you're literally approaching toy.
I right now.
Why did you not just not come?
You weirdo. So she comes and then heavenly and lease in a coal com, which is really awkward.
And heavenly goes, this is awkward. And leasing the coal after we had a verbal
authentication. I was like, heavenly's like the only person on the show who can use those words properly.
So she automatically wins any fight, except for Dr. Jackie.
Yes.
So Janice Meanwhile shows up wearing basically a cocktail napkin.
It's not a commentary on how short her skirt is.
It's just that her skirt literally looks like a cocktail napkin.
It's like making little diamonds.
It was like she took it, she took off her pants,
I kept an napkin on and was like, a little diamond. It was like she took it, she took off her pants, I kept an napkin on, and it was like,
I'm just gonna walk out where I'm else.
I like that Janice always looks like she's listening
very intently, but could also yell at you at any moment.
She's always looking like mm-hmm, mm-hmm,
and then her earrings are always huge
and dangling back and forth.
I'm like, oh my god, this woman was about to go off.
And then she's like, hi. She is like waiting for her moment and she never seems to realize what it is. Yeah.
Your moment was with the stove. Okay. And then Quad comes in and she has one of her most
force jokes ever. And this is coming from me who makes a lot of forced jokes. And she goes,
honey, this spot is for R and R, not M-A-R-I-H.
It's like, wow, I mean, we know you don't make sense,
but that was really, that was,
you can do better.
It's worse when she doesn't make sense
and she's actually prewritten the line.
Because you know that she's practiced
this in front of Quentin, the sister-in-law, her husband and no one had the fourth thought
to tell her that doesn't make any sense.
It doesn't, it just doesn't work.
It's not as good.
I prefer her nonsense.
For instance, I prefer to say this.
Baby, toit, I'm pushed through honey, ho, or made novel. And of course, there's also the classic.
Me and Miss Chia, the Daffodil, has it, honey.
Just come in, say nonsense, that literally is unintelligible.
It's just, it's just phonics.
Just say, just do phonics and we'll assign the meaning.
Those clips go pretty bad.
But I'm going to move it up.
Baby.
Hey, I'm a toy.
I'm booster honey.
Oh, Irvay number.
She loses toy.
Don boost you whole honey Irvay number.
Huh?
Huh?
Baby.
Time.
Don.
Boop.
Boop.
Boop.
Boop.
Boop. Boop. Boop. Boop. Boop. Oh, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuck She's like we're going to Hawaii and I want to all be in a good place because this trip is free for me
I don't want to waste it. I'm turning to a in depurral from t2 7. You are you are here happening. I hear it happening
So yeah, all right, so least Nicole I want you to feel better about yourself
So we're gonna get your quarter-gather so we can have that baby because babies can't be born in fat stomachs
And she could, at least Nicole goes, my core is good baby.
And how do you know?
Maybe I can't do core exercises because how do you know if I'm with child or not?
Yeah, because you're like 60.
That's how I live in.
That's how I live in.
I was crunchy core.
How do you know?
And I love that. So I was like, so what? Yeah, I will child.
I will announce that one. It is time for that to transpire.
Shut up, Lisa Nicole. Trying to make it sound like you're in court.
And then Toya, uh, she gets really pissed off. And who did she tell? Oh, she goes, well, you get your cool, Deid she goes well you get your call did and you get
And say you like rap no no no she's no to go you get your toilet you get your corded and then
Least me cause like and you're gonna get your cell you like them. Oh, thank you my notes and then and then the best though
The very very best to me was when toya says the quad So we're going to do, you have such a beautiful face,
and we don't want it to be even better,
so we're going to take up all that makeup
and give you a facial.
Be really nice.
You have to get your paws clean and it'll be really nice.
And Quad was so furious.
She's like, I should have not want to take off her makeup
that she spent two hours putting on for the camera.
But Mariah goes, Quad, no makeup in here.
Honey, that's Mr. Potato Head.
And I laughed out louds.
I mean, really loudly.
I was like, I think this is the funniest thing
that Mariah has ever said.
She said a lot of funny stuff,
but calling quad Mr. Potato Head without her hair
makeup, oh, and even better, was that quad
was about to be like, honey,
honey, I don't take off this makeup,
but Mariah was like, well, I know that quad will take it off
cause she's a good sport.
And Quad's like, that is right.
I will take off my makeup.
So angry.
And Quad was like, wooza, wooza meditation.
Baby, makeup a facial color, boobie love love, mama.
So heavenly in the meantime, heavenly is going.
She's like doing this crazy witch laugh.
It is so loud and hilarious.
And she goes quad goes energy work.
Who did she give energy work to?
I don't know why I'm taking so many nonsensical notes
in this.
I was trying to transcribe every moment.
Why?
So Quad, well, she wanted to give energy work
to who's left on the show.
I think Mariah, right?
Because then Mariah goes, oh, well, you should do it too.
And I was like, wow, wait a little
to destroy your amazing line, right before.
Yeah, I was like, OK. a destroy your amazing line right before it was like okay. And then
um, you know what I loved? She's giving everyone
facials, relaxation, energy work and she's like,
Janice, you have to do yoga. Everyone else is relaxing.
And Janice gets stuck doing yoga and Janice is like,
well, I'm tired. And Janice is supposed to be like a fitness
person and she's
sweating her ass off and in pain.
So Jackie gets to go get some Botox and restoling and stuff.
And they go, well, she real skinny.
So to make her face look less busted and little and skeleton
like she, he fell as a 30 pounds girl.
And she didn't curse, though.
I didn't curse. So let's see, the raky lady was hilarious. She's
like, hello, welcome to raky, I'm not going to speak from this
point on, unless I'm directed by a spirit to do so.
Dong, dong, dong, dong, she starts dawning about little gold bowl like from all of me.
When the spirits are exiled, when the spirit inside of Mariah.
And then Jackie is, Jackie, what does Jackie say?
Maybe you could do someone's vagina.
Oh, they're talking about late-beal Botox.
Yeah, yeah.
And Quad goes, well, I think some girls have an open door policy.
I just, they're're open for no reason girl
Quad the gates. Oh honey the gates are open by the gates. I mean the labia because I don't vlog to any labia
Labels like what were you saying now? I don't know what to say word to talk about
Labia labels
libbles that's not even a word liable. I don't know Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, everybody. You're relaxed. You're relaxed. You're relaxed. So she goes into the met or the massage room
where Simone is supposed to be getting her massage. And instead, Lisa Nicole is on the table.
Who did I say? Lisa, who did I say? No, no, no, yeah, Lisa Nicole is on the table. Simone is supposed to
be in the alone because Simone's been dealing with the death of her father and toy are genuinely
wanted Simone to have some alone time where she can just relax and
tune everyone out. So of course there's Lisa Nicole and they are not dealing with
her trainer. And she's on the table about to get the massage. She's like,
we deleted the age. She's like, I want to be in the same zone. Is that okay with you?
Like, why is she on the massage table and supposed at the chair?
That's just so leasing a cold.
You know, leasing a cold when she started this was so boring.
I mean, wow, really, really boring, like no personality or whatever.
But she's just really turned into just an asshole.
I was going to say, well, she started she started off this, her run on marriage medicine
being so boring. And what's amazing is that now three years in, she's become just still so boring.
But now annoying and boring. She's awful, but I love that toy who is so concerned with someone having
tranquility, starts yelling, why the fuck would you go into the room
great great that's what gonna really work well with Simone's tranquility although actually with given Simone's track record she probably is most relaxed when people are yelling yeah
so they go into the water and it's a twin did by the way i'm sorry interrupt but since when did
toya and Simone become some close didn't they have like it weren't they hating each other last year
they couldn't stand aside of each other They were just fighting like cats and dogs.
And now, you know, Toya is like, I love you.
Yeah, it seems to be a thing with Toya
where she's just rude and awful to everybody
and then they all let her have it.
But then she's like that again
and they realize she's just stupid.
Like she doesn't even, she doesn't even seem to get it.
She's just an idiot.
And they're like, oh, there's our idiot, you know, sister,
who's always telling everybody off.
And I don't know, it's like a right of passage on these shows.
Yeah.
So ultimately, this Toya, at least in the cold thing,
turns into a huge fight.
And Lisa Nicole takes this as a Toya bossing her around,
which is really not what it was.
Lisa Nicole, you know, Toya, Toyob says explicitly she didn't want anyone to bother Simone
and then Lisa Nicole turns into that.
You don't get to tell me what to do.
And then they start yelling.
She's like, I'm not Eugene.
You don't run me bitch.
Which Toyob responds by saying, family is off limits.
Family is off limits with your gay ass husband.
And Mariah is like, oh, go lease in the cold. You go get her ass.
Mariah always rooting for the satanic side.
Yeah, always always.
This show is net. So this was episode eight, I think.
I'm not sure how many they're doing this year.
Not a good sign that it got moved to Friday, but Jesus this show makes me laugh every time I watch it so I know it's like not one of your faves at the moment but I hope they pull it back around.
Yeah, they I mean I'm always hopeful they'll pull it back around but I just I don't know I think I think these women are not always
Giving themselves. I feel I just feel like they are they manufacture a lot of drama and to me that just rings false Yeah, and that that bothers me
Well, you know, it's maybe it'll come back and maybe it'll it'll surge
I remember last season I also was not so happy within the second half got really good
So you know, there's always hope always we're to find out tonight because it's back on tonight Friday night.
Everybody thank you so much. Oh, what did I forget? We actually forgot to do crap in
the mailbag, which is the Friday thing. Oh, okay, well knock it out. Let's knock out some mailbag,
man. Let's knock out some mailbag. So normally we'll do this at the top of the show, but since we were so excited, we got right into marriage
of medicine.
So we have a few things left over from our last mailbag.
And then we'll get into our new bit,
a little bit of our new mailbag, too.
Mark Napp says, what Canadian city do you think should be?
Oh, I didn't play the Crappin's mailbag music,
but I'm sure we can all move on. What Canadian city do you think should be oh, I didn't play the crap and smell back me to say but I'm sure we can all move on
What Canadian city do you think should be a franchise?
Ottawa which is the capital of Canada political and historical Toronto lots of money people multi-cultural or
Montreal heart of French Canadian people lots of old money is new to folks also drinking ages 18
I think Montreal is a definite one you we definitely need to see some French Canadians on TV. Wherever they charge, like three times as much for books, because that's really
all I know about Canada, because I would, you know, read a lot of books when I was younger,
and on the back it always says US $5 Canada $15. And it's like holy crap, who lives in Canada,
and why they paying so much for a book.
So that's really all I know about Canada and also Celine Dion.
Yeah.
I'd like to say the province that gave us Celine Dion is like what else do we need?
Celine Dion shows what sort of show we would have and it would be wonderful.
Yeah.
I would love a Celine one.
I'd like a Celine getting on with her life after it was.
Yeah, I would I like about Montreal is that you'd have the pushenish pushenish of the French
with the grudge holding of the Quebec quads, you know, you know, they're they're licensed
played as Jumasouvier, which means I remember.
So, um, Laurie, um, there's an emergency outside.
Laurie says, we love Laurie.
Hi Laurie.
She says, hello darlings.
Can you believe it?
I'm already married.
She says, I was doing some old OC viewing and I'm on the season where Laurie wearing and
her weird mouth were trying to convince us that she and George were showing the world
their fairy tale love based on that season long trip to delusion town. Can you guys rank the top five
bravo bridesilas their level of delusion they're whining, bachelorette, my friends, and family, etc.
Thanks. I found my soul mate. I'm so happy. Yeah. Well, Luan has, we've gotten a taste of her being a bridezilla
because she is already started pulling her.
Well, if you want to talk like that,
you won't be invited to the wedding.
You know, she's done shit like that,
but we didn't have to put up with too much of it from her,
mostly because her husband got caught cheating on camera.
Yes.
So she had to set up pretty quick about that. Katie's a monster. I think Katie is a total
monster. She knew what sort of a monster, but she's Katie is more of a monster than she was. Yeah,
she knew what's a monster, but she was like a Sina. You know, she was. She was. She was. I mean,
she, I don't think she treated her friends badly, and I don't think she was too delusional,
except for the fact that her marriage would work out, but she did wine a lot, you know.
I can't believe this is happening a week before my wedding for everything.
Um, Tamara is a monster in general, and she got married.
So that count.
She was also kind of awful during hers too.
I remember her yelling at the wedding planner and stuff like that was not a good look.
Yeah, I would say number one for Delusional honestly. Number one, Bridezilla would have
to be Luan just because the delusion is too much. It's too much. However, I say this
in the best way. I love the Luan delusion. That's one of her defining features.
Okay. And then so who should we put number two? I mean Katie is pretty bad. Katie is pretty pretty bad. What's about Katie number two? Why not? Okay Katie number two
I think there's a space for Nini. There's a space for Nini probably a number three in terms of breadzilla. Oh God
Nini was terrible
She didn't she have a whole spin off about being terrible for her second wedding to Greg. Oh
She was terrible and then she got she got all of Greg's kids together
Yeah, and who Greg totally dumped the minute he started dating Neenie because she didn't like the kids and they were like well
You know, it's just weird that the minute dad went with you
You know he stopped talking to us And so it's made us feel like
you don't even want us. And she's like, well, how do you think I felt? Like you cheated
with their, their mother, like you cheated when their father on their mother and then refused
to have them around the house. How do you feel? You awful cow. Yeah. Neenie is probably
number one. And actually probably number two is Bethany.
And then probably number three is Kim Zolciak. And then we can put in Luann and then Katie.
I think that would be a good top five. Okay, yeah, I'll go with that. I'll co-sign.
Yeah, I feel like Tamara. I mean, I didn't actually watch her wedding series, but I feel
like it was just Tamara just being Tamara. I don't think that like,
I don't, I don't, I can't imagine becoming any more of a Bridezilla. I think she was just
steady Tamara. Huh?
Like for most people when they become a Bridezilla, they're just only reaching a Tamara level. Tamara just has to stay steady.
Tamara just has to stay at the same level of awful.
Yeah.
Okay.
What else is in that mailbag being?
The last thing that we did not address in our mailbag comes from Jackie Flavin who has
a very simple request.
Smells like Chateau Shirei.
Oh my God.
Well, sawdust. Smalled sawdust and fresh baseboards.
Yeah, sawdust and cock, like bathroom cock.
I feel like she walks around that house because she likes to accomplish things,
but doesn't know how to do that much.
So I feel like she's the kind of girl to walk around with a cock gun just cocking everything, you know.
I ain't going to be able to bug some of my house.
I feel like it smells like Bob's sweaty neck and old cheesecake.
Yeah, it's going to smell like IKEA chase lounge and Bob's like sweaty ass.
It smells like a box of monkey wrenches and paprika.
It smells like old spice and weed because our son
is like the cologne he can afford in the marijuana.
It smells like supermarkets sushi and a rapper
of a zone bar rapper.
I think it smells like Chinese food
because you know she eats a lot of Chinese food
and that smell never goes away.
And then the smell of those wet naps
that she steals when she poops at the gas station.
It smells like sandbox meets Ferris Wheel.
I think it smells like melted Kenya hair that she's like taken off of wigs and like horse poop for some it's like that kind of house it's like why does this house smell
like manure and she's like it's miracle you got miracle It smells like someone has pet birds meets corn flakes.
Corn flakes.
I wouldn't doubt if that house smelled like hamster wood chips.
Yes.
Have you ever had a hamster?
Oh, yes.
And you have to put the, you have to put wood chips in there,
in their cage or whatever. I feel like it smells like wood chips in there and people walk in and they're like
Why does it smell like hamster and it's because that house is taking so long to build and it's rained and you know
It's leaked and it's just like leaking on raw wood
I mean if anyone has mold in their house it's charay so I say hamster chips and mold
Well, you know that she probably saved money
on insulation by not installing fiberglass and said putting a bunch of hamster wood chips
in a burlap sack and tipped me up to the bottom of her floors. So it's not just that it
smells like, you know, because like when you put the fresh wood chips in for hamsters,
it smells nice, but when it's three days later, it just sort of starts to smell dank. That's what it is. A hamster cage, it has them in clean in three days.
And that's the Ray's house.
And that's sure, that is Chateau.
Sure.
The crappin's mail bar, we're going to close it up. Don, that is the end of Crappens.
We love you guys, we will talk to you next week.
Yes, bye everyone.
Hey Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download
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