Watch What Crappens - #383 Ladies of London: A Midsummer Night's Scream

Episode Date: February 3, 2017

We're feeling puckish for today's recap of "Ladies of London," which has the women celebrating Swedish Midsummer's Eve. There's herring, gravlax, and a dollop of screaming. Grab your twisted bread on a stick and get ready to roast your carbs and these ladies over an open flame. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders Cupi from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crap is watch what crap is Who cares what happens when there's so much that crap is Who crap is

Who crap is Who crap is Watch what crap is Watch what crap is Who cares what happens when there's so much Who crap is Who crap is Hey everyone, welcome to Watch Where Crapins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mendelker from BesideBlog.com and the banter blender and joining me as usual is the hilarious, the wonderful,

the positively lovely and delightful Ronnie Karem from trashtalktv.com and the Rose Prick's Bachelor podcast and also Real Housewives of Beverly Hills audiobooks. Oh man! I love the way you lie! I apologize. I ate like two peanuts right before this podcast and I was done eating them, but you know like peanuts they just sort of stick in your mouth. So I'm sorry if it sounds like I've got stuff in my mouth.

I have little peanuts specs all over the place. I can't get rid of them. Yeah, peanuts never leave you, Vin. I know. I know. Um, welcome to the show, everyone. Today we're talking about ladies and london. Here on the big show, our pen ultimate episode of Ladies and London.

So fucking sad. The pen ulti. Pen ulti. And by the way, just as a reminder, if for some reason you missed yesterday's show, we had Heather McDonald on, and we had a very first installment of Listener Spotlight. So go check that out. Ladies and ladies of London. Oh my god. Ladies of London. Ladies of London.

It's the ladies of London and the ladies of London. They are ladies in London. Girl, power, girl, power. They were getting all the songs in this episode. It was a great hits. Yeah, it was the greatest hits of the ladies of London lady. Yeah, he was drunk in her studio apartment making shit on GarageBand. Yeah, and it started off with her being like, you think you've got what it takes? I'll be the one to step on the brakes. I'm like, you know she was having a good day that day because she rhymed something. I know. I'm like, it, the song of a DMV driver. You think you go get a live scene or get

swat on ghost breaks. You can't give you a parlor park a little bit bad on the queen. I'm in reverse now. I'm in reverse now neutral, but you always are in drive. The best thing is that that could totally be a song. And it would be it would be like, oh wow, it's a girl power song. Yeah. Turn the key. Turn on the ignition. Here we go. I'm on a mission. Blue, blue, blue, blue, blue, blue, scanning around, cannot find my car. Press the button on my alarm, because I can't find my car. Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo The windshield wipers came on for no reason. It must be raining. It must be raining. The wheels on the bus go round and round, but guess what? I take the car. She gets sued for copyright infringement.

It's like finally they took that woman down. I like her brand of impetuous vehicle music. of impetuous vehicle music. No. No, I drive my car slowly with a defroster on when it's warm. I love this, though. I know. So we open with saying by. Oh, care. Oh, I didn't write down Sophie. What's what's Sophie do? Sophie showed up at Caroline's hotel room. Oh, well, I was, I was even before that when they're just, when she's singing the song and they're showing all the different people doing their little things at the beginning

of the episode. Oh, yeah. Don't worry, I didn't write down all of them, but Caroline's was hilarious because her daughter, her kids are in the car getting ready to go to Dubai and she's going to stay in town to finish shooting the show. And so they're leaving and she's like, goodbye, daughter. Say goodbye to the house and her kids like, no one likes this house anyway. We don't care. She's like, all right, well, goodbye.

I thought she said the other thing. I thought she went the other way around. She's like, well, everyone likes this house. So whatever it sucks. I thought she was angry that she had to move. Either way, she's still a senior mom like a rental house she's just a little Caroline she's like we don't even like this house goodbye oh good we are a lot of people are our best driver take me to Dubai forward forward forward I'm good. Jusebox. Jusebox. Forward. Clear the Jusebox.

Slowly. Across the five alive. You know that she's really too relaxed, Caroline, because her weave line was sewing in the back. Like you could see the sew. What do you call that part where it's the sewn-on part? I don't know. She's really tired.

Did Luke take the day off? She's going to be mortified when she sees a close-up of this. Oh, I didn't notice that. What kind of gay are you? I know. Darling. I think that was when I was immersed in a Facebook, a Facebook war that I mentioned in yesterday's episode. I think I was having to defend my stance on something. I was like watching Lazy London and also debating national issues as one does. Yeah, I don't do that. I don't debate them because I make both sides mad. Now, if I do anything, I'll just put links

because people click on them and then they're an article that's really long and never gets to the point. Like, I make sure to find the most confusing links to post just so people will stop trying to fight with me. the most confusing links to post just so people will start trying to fight with me. So any who, Sophie and Caroline are getting massages. And that's nice. Yeah, Caroline's talking about how she's going to spend the next week's thing goodbye to London. So she's getting a massage and stuff. And this seems like Caroline's going to

have this really sweet week, where she's going to get together with all of her friends and just say, buy one-on-one. It's like, here we are on a hotel together. And so because I'm really super relieved, Caroline, that we built, we built our bridges and we're back together stronger than ever. And then it cuts to Caroline going, frankly, I think that says something about me. Look at the good I do. And then the next song is let's go. Let's go. Let's go.

Let's go. That's a modern spelling out. Let's go. That's a modern spelling out. Let's go. That's a modern classic on this show, that one. They bring that one out a lot now. Ever since she dropped, let's go. They've been like, oh, let's play, let's go again. That's a big popular one.

The best social numbers are coming from let's go. And this week, topping the charts, the Ladies and London Billboard Hot 100 list. It's L E T S. Let's go. Up this week topping the charts, the ladies of London billboard hot 100 list, it's LETS. Let's go up through spots from number three to number one to be fair, the only three spots on our hot 100. We really we want to call it the hot three, but it didn't have the same ring to it. We still respect rock and dick on his new years. I like it. We still respect rock and dick on his new years. I like Clark. We still respect Dick Clark, even though he's not with us anymore.

I like, like, my latest Elanjan hot 100 radio show is hosted by Adele. I don't understand the pain of the job 3! I'm now here with the longest in dedication is me to the courts. You don't understand what I've been going through number 2, I just can't, I can't you play this next record. Coming up, the most devastating song of the year number three. The most devastating song of the year number three, known as Let's Not Go, L-E-T-S-N-O-G-O. And now, for the greatest vain mother can ever hear. At number one, L-E-T-S.D.O. let's go.

I'd like to unlock that Jema Stephenson who sings these songs. The first artist to have all three hits in all three spots on the Lazy London charts. Congratulations Jema! So the next one is Fleming Flower Shopping with some friends for her. Last midsommers. No. For the new midsommers, a tradition that is extremely important to me. So important that I haven't done it in 30 years. Whenever I love flowers, and I love the fragrance of flowers, whenever I am somewhere and I can see a clear path to flowers, I will absolutely go and have a sniff. And then I like that even when she's being totally sincere and could

possibly cry, it's like she's talking about her dead mom or whatever and the editors are such assholes, but they always make it a Fleming scene. I love that they're doing those Fleming clips now. The blueberries, the blubbers, so funny. She's like, when I think of midsommas, I think of mother's voice. And I think of her laughing. And it's just rather magical. It's rather, I think of herring, Gravelox, blubert's, strawberries, Himalayan sea salt, colds that never happen because I like the Himalayan sea salt. I literally write down every single thing she says. Me too.

She's so hilarious. She's walking, she's talking to the ladies who are just like flower people. Yeah, like, okay, how many flowers do you need? You know, she's like, well, I love doing this stuff. It is one of my greatest, greatest, greatest hobbies. She everything is just very emphasized and very hyperbolic. What we would love would be to have some sort of maple,

which at first I thought she said maple and I was like, you want a tree, but then I realized it was a maple. I just can imagine her ordering Chinese food. You know what I would love would be some egg fuyang So when cashew chicken invigorates the spirit within me like no other flavor of chicken They're like okay, you're finished and all what I would like a side of Okay, you finish that all what I would like a side

Of sticky rice What I would love Would be an egg roll something to remind me of childhood spend rolling down here sides amongst wildflowers and bluepers and strawberries Well, the ladies are like okay, so what flowers are you watching? Here's what I want Oh, the ladies are like, okay, so what flowers are you watching? She goes, here's what I want. This is a huge deal for me. And I want it to carry a lot of feeling. And then she nods at them very seriously.

And they're like, um, carnations. What does she want? Like anybody did any of the dandrons? Snap dragons. She's like, I like to kick that one. I know. And runs snap drag on Lylax kick that one. I know I love I coming in at number five for the first ever. Now I never buy Gemma Atherton. Actually, I think Gemma Atherton's an actress.

Either way, it's her crossover role. She is, I mean, it is a real girl who's on Twitter because I saw her tweet random. I think one of the Housewives or one of the ladies retweeted her because she was like, if I get enough free tweets, I'll release the entire opening theme. I was like, oh, girl, but I don't know if she got enough free tweets because I don't have that on my iPod. So I don't know what happened, you girl.

So Adela joins Caroline and Sophie at the hotel and she tells a story about like, I've never been confused for a positive, but I once was confused for who does waitress in Vegas. I- I- He dropped me off the taxi driver, dropped me off in front of the who does hotel in Vegas and said, are you ready for work? I was like, no darling, I'm supposed to be at the spearman right now.

I think Caroline's like, she put, they're all in pajamas. So she puts on these, no, she's one of those like aging ladies who still wear them juicy. Yeah. It's like juicy and really tight t-shirts that are like, fuck me here with a arrow pointing down or whatever. Uh, is she wears that and Caroline goes, if the taxi driver saw that, he wouldn't have thought it was a hole, he would have thought you were an absolute lunatic. a whole he would have thought you were an absolute lunatic. Burn. Um, they're asking her how she sees and stuff and she's like, when does it end?

When does it end? You know, in court, the way that you do things for every little thing, you have to file paperwork by a certain date. So I was a dream of the applications. Yeah, I'm like, wait a minute. Kids, I love you, but I hate paperwork, so have a nice life. That's what it sounded like, right? Yeah, I'm sure it was much more than that, but that's sort of how it sounded.

Yeah, I didn't explain that you, that the children get to make up their own mind after age 12, so it's kind of pointless if they don't want to be with her anyways. She can't force them, which makes more sense. Right. And she said that also that like their dad has put it in their head that like if they don't want to be with her anyways, she can't force them, which makes more sense. Right. And she said that also that like their dad has put it in their head that like if they hang out, they go see her that they're gonna get in trouble with him. So they're like almost afraid to go see her,

which is really sad. Yeah, this whole Adela thing throughout this episode, I'm still gonna make fun of it, but it was really heartbreaking because, well, you know what, we'll talk about it when we get to the big fight. Yeah, at the end. But yeah, they start talking about the upcoming mid-Summer party and I love Caroline.

Stanford's reaction is like, well, I hate flowers and I hate ribbons, so I really don't want to go. I dread it. Flowers and pose. Flowers, pose and ribbons. Is there anything worse than that? She's like, I love a strip up hole. I'm like, you do not. She like got up on some box one time wasted and everyone's like, woo, and she's like, I love a strip up hole. I cannot imagine that because they started talking about their favorite position or whatever and Caroline goes, I love a reverse cowgirl, reverse, reverse. She means that literally, she's like, I like the reverse of whatever a cowgirl is.

So a cowgirl is an American and rural. So I love someone who's British and urban. Yeah, exactly. She's like, I hate cowgirl. So reverse cowgirl. Reves. And she didn't even know what it was. So Adele gets on top of Sophie to show her,

and she goes, you can view it around the world as well. Oh, literally, this is what I was doing in a taxi cab when he dropped me over the Huttas Casino. So she does, she does this around the world on, I guess the imaginary weiner on Sophie, and like turns to face her, and Sanberry just totally seriously goes, I guess the imaginary weener on Sophie and like turns to face her and

Sanberry just totally seriously goes. What's the point of that? I love that she really does just to have no sense of humor sometimes at all. I just love it because it's not even fake. Sometimes it seems like oh, she's just acting like an ice cream But she probably really cries at night. Nope This is pretty much her Welcome to you me. Welcome to me you

Welcome to me and you when you and me with the same It's Jeva stunswick once again with another entry in the top five ladies and London hot 100 list coming in at number four is what's it got to do with you governor a great new song dropping this weekend please Zach and I have some more so now it's a Caroline, Caroline, and Stanberry showing Luke some clothing. And I think that was it.

That was it. Is that why do you keep shopping? Jim's gonna kill you, just drop in money out that, you know, Dan and Volcano, that's it. Okay. Thanks. Great. And then it cuts to jewels.

Like they're getting ready a lot in this episode. Well, there's a lot of getting ready for things. Wait, and not only did they cut to jewels, we then had the song again and this time the song was going, damn you mess with me, down to you mess with me and then it cuts to jewels teaching your son how to chop an onion. I was like, what? What about like, oh no, if you mess with me, you're gonna have to chop an onion. Don't you forget that. Don't mess with me. Oh, you'll cry. You'll cry because you're gonna have to chop some.

Everyone makes. Yeah, at this point, they're just putting that shit on shuffle. Yeah, whatever comes up comes up. Yeah. So, Jules is even insecure teaching her kid to chop and onion. She's like, are you crying? Do you like this? Are you happy or do you hate this?

Are you crying because of the onion? Or are you crying because you hate learning how to chop up? And you're like, oh, I just wanted to do this right with you. It's like, mom, I hate you. No. It's like, please leave me be, mom. So now we go to an old lady with a bell.

So she's like, ding, dong, dong, dong, dong, dong, dong, I'm working on Marissa and I was like, Oh, good, who's dead? Yeah. It's a Marissa scene. It was sort of weird to see the British version of like, like shitty California new age mysticism. With that face like, not face that she gives. Yeah. And then over at Juliet's

what's your name? Bob, Bob, and it's her mother who's there and she's like, hello, it's me. Happy new year. It's like, oh my God,

why isn't she been on every episode? I love her already. I know she was really sweet and lovely and I'm by the way, I have to say Julia's daughter is so cute. She is a really really cute. Yeah She's such a sweet little kid. She really is cute and I love that one Babsha showed up She's like, oh my precious and Julia's like, it's precious not pressure and she's like, no, I feel pressure to give a good female role model to them. It's my pressure. I'm pressured.

No pressure, my blood pressure. Have you seen what you're writing? But actually, she's so supportive of Juliet's craziness. It's really cute. She's like, show me, blog. Because show me this blog. How fabulous. How fabulous it is.

You, in your fashion, you are so serious with fashion. It's wonderful for Juliet. Juliet is, you know, talking back growing up, going to Polish school and she Polish was her first language and she's like, yeah, I'm like totally fluent and then they got to this, clipp of her in like a Polish deli and she's like She's trying to say sausage They showed all these pictures of Juliet and Polish school as a little kid with these little like you know around the world And what does that write it does me like? It's a small world. Small, small, small,

small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small,

small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small,

small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small, small,, small, small, small, small,, small, small, small, small, like, little house on the Polish prairie childhood. Yeah. It explains why she likes things inside of things, like those little balls. She looks just like me as a kid, which is weird. They showed pictures of her when she was a little younger than that, and I was like, oh my god, it's me, it's a little girl-porting.

When production asks you for pictures, don't give them those. Just say you don't have any of your house burned down. Yeah. Um, yeah. So this is really, really cute. The mom was really sweet when they stood up when the mom and Angeliette and the granddaughter all stood and hold hand, held hand to mom's like, how do you do that?

I was like, oh my goodness. I'm so cute. And when she said, I'll never forget that when I was younger, like my parents started this business and I'll never forget their flyer They have like all these liars printed up and it said we will clean your house sparking clean It's like oh what a hilarious typo I don't know why that made me laugh so hard. It was so cute. Maybe think of Ken Ken Todd Threading to punch James at Sir,

oh, not your spock out. Yeah. Spock out of you. So then another transitional music moment. And this was again, one of our favorites. This is the way they would say, God save the queen, God save the queen. And guess what? The queen is me except, for some reason, they cut out the last part, so it went like this. God save the queen, God save the queen, God save the queen, God save the queen, but guess what? And then they just left it there.

I'm like, what? I'm like, what? I'm like, how could you, how could you just leave us hanging there with a guess what I mean Luckily the Queen has been sick lately, so maybe they felt disrespectful. They're like don't say the Queen is me That's disrespectful. She's in the bed Dropping six spots on ladies and London hot three one hundred list is God save the Queen which is down to number nine They should never have taken out the queen, his me.

It's her own point of the zone. We officially do not like the remix. So Adela goes over to Julie's house with her little dog, Disco. And you know, that means she's doing really well in her recovery because I watch that Sandra Bullock movie called 28 days, late in her 28 days or whatever. And she goes to rehab and you have to keep a plan to live for a year and then you can get a goldfish or something and then you can get a dog. So I mean, that's good.

She's got a good couple of years. Disco look happy. Yeah. Disco looks very happy and loving life, loving the disco life. Speaking of disco, it's Tom Femmes-Livas bowl. So Jules is basically having Adela to come over and help pour up her daughter a little bit so she can get laid at prom. And are they cutting the IV for the party later? Is that why they're cutting all

that IV? Yeah, that that IV was for the mid-summer's party. Oh, so yeah, they cut IV. And this is just a cutscene because Jules is like, she's everything to me. What am I going to do? When she's gone, she's going to be gone. It's just going to be me. At least I have these tea towels. Oh no, we don't have the tea towels. Barely. And that was basically that scene except for Adela just making little comments here and there. Adela, you know, she's just holding on to that vagina. It's hard to she can't. I don't know what's going on with her vagina, but she's like, you're going to get out there and work as hard as you can Did you try a lot of ears because everything she says she's like, I don't want to get I

I felt bad for Adele though because it was a really sweet moment You know Julie is so sad because her daughter is moving out Well, we moving moving out soon, because this is basically like British prom, except with legal booze. And so they're taking pictures, and Adela is taking pictures of Julie with her daughter and her friend,

and then Adela is talking to us, and we're like, the hardest thing is for a mother to childly enjoy. Ha! But I mean, it was really so sad. It was sad. I was like, I feel bad for this woman, because she's watching this, and she's thinking watching Julie's wonderful relationship I mean, it was really so sad. It was sad. I was like, ugh, I feel bad for this so many.

Because she's watching this and she's thinking, watching Julie's wonderful relationship with her daughter and she's thinking, like, I'm just probably never gonna have that even if we work to a good place, this is not a moment that I'll be able to have my daughter. And I was like, I was sad. I was getting a little scared. Yeah, it really was sad.

This show is very London in that. They're not afraid to just be sad. Obviously, I mean, the season open and it was like, Marissa's gonna die. Marissa's baby is gonna die. This guy's gonna die. It was everybody just crying about dying and moving. It's one of the saddest ones, but also one of the most hilarious ones.

Love the mixture. Yes. Love the mixture. Yes. So Juliet is next. She's getting dressed with her mom. And she's like, you are so passionate for fashion. I love it.

And we get some more little Polish stories. And then Juliet talking about how her parents were divorced when she was older, but her dad, she was never good enough for her dad. And but at least she still has her mom. And I'm like, oh my god. Just yeah, it's so I know. And they should have flashback of her telling this to,

I think it was the Caroline Fleming, right? Wasn't she like talking to Caroline Fleming? Yeah. And she's like, I was never as good enough for my dad and Caroline Fleming's like, that, that, and she gets on the cheek. Like, you can be quiet now. Notias. Thank you for trying be quiet now. Not yours.

Thank you for trying to compare your pain to mine. It didn't work very well, but I appreciate effort. I found it beautiful and spiritually moving. Please be quiet. I am sure you must have had so many terrible days sitting there alone, crying in your castle in America. Did you not? I don't really have a castle. I don't understand and I wish you would not lie to me anymore. You may not have gold.

Foughtinally for you. Silence is golden. So you can you can take that. Julia, it must be so difficult for you to go back to Chicago and see a statue of your father. Well, I don't think there's not really one. Oh! How strange! I know it's difficult for you being followed by teenagers with iPhones, snapping your pictures, every moment of the day. I'm sorry.

I don't see them. Are they well hidden yours? Did you ever consider the fact that perhaps if you had made your bed a little better without any creases your father would have loved you more? I'm sorry. Your father never got to see you bounce a nickel off of a perfectly made bed. It's almost too bad that you never learned how to make Pesto because that probably would have saved everything between you and your father. But how lucky are you to have me that you chew about Pesto to save you in the future. And now at number 2.5 that the ladies of London top 100 I turn grey skies I turn grey skies blue I bring sunshine wherever I go

We love that song by Gemma Mappapa Mappapa I don't know I was gonna say Gemma Mappatum something weird came out of me I like Gemma Mappoon. I like that. Jim a mappartoon. Jim a mappartoon. And Jim, you forget it. So Fleming is setting up and the scene she's on her tiny rented island or whatever setting up for her party.

And it's the first line is that's poo. That was poo. I just touched. That was poo. That was poo, I just touched. That was poo. It's all about the perth art location. I found a cute little island with elements of Scandinavia. Water, for example. It's fabulous.

There's so much Comte cheese on this island. You would have thought someone built this island just for me. The maple, I shall build the maple myself. The maple is to celebrate the harvest. Celebrate love and light. Celebrate love and friendship. The maple is the symbol of this. The maple is the symbol of this. Dugly!

It's Higly. A very Danish sentence. Higly. It's a celebration of ugly. Was that poo I just touched or was it simply ugly? I would like to take a deep breath and so uh Fleming is there Kim is with her Kim is the friend of and they're sitting on a bench and Fleming is saying you know my dad is not doing well and is very sad,

a very sad time for me. You know, we don't know how much time he has left. And Kim is just like nods and then just like touches her, touches her like forearm very briefly. I was like, that's the British way of giving a very long deep hug. Yeah, that was an Eden hug right there. That was an Eden hug, a little... I'm now at number 2.75. Don't you take us for granted. Bring your cameras. We stand for something. It's like what? Don't you take us for granted. Bring your cameras. We stand for something. That's Gemma Cabal Smith with a brand new blazing hit cameras stand for something. Wow, a little preview. Got rising up.

The ladies are London hot 100 chart coming in at number 2.3. I want to do a musical version of the show just using all this music and see people's reaction. Yeah. Because you never know people could be like, that is so simple and it's beauty, you know, or beautiful in its simplicity rather. Probably not. Who knows? So Marissa's getting her hair done and talking about, you know, Fleming or whatever. And her husband's like, well, she goes, I don't really want to go. I mean, it's not my kind of phone. It's like on an island. And he goes, actually, you know, I love living. She was very supportive in the hospital, lots of texts. And Marissa goes, she was.

I have to interrupt everything, by the way, this is an emergency. To emergency. We just got tweeted at by Stasi Schroeder. What does she say? Oh my god. She says, I wish y'all could do commentary on my life 24-7. Sounds narcissistic, but really is it? Oh my... She wishes that? What is she? A glutton for punishments? I kind of want to respond back. We would love to do that. Yeah, just respond back. We will have a go pro to you by evening

I'm just gonna say that would be our dream I say that's terrifying that would say that would be that would be our dream That is absolutely terrifying. Well, that just goes to show you don't have to be nice to people because I'm hideous to her. Yeah, but you know what though? She's hideous to people and so she gets the she understands she knows the game. But I'm like right like some I'm hideous to everybody, but it's more in a fun way. I get nasty about her. There are some people that just enraged me to the point where I'm like,

man, you idiot terrible human being. And yeah, she's done actually this week. So yeah, I mean, I, I think I mean, I, I like hate love saucy because I love coming down on her, but I also love, I love the idea of saucy. Yeah, I mean, we go to the same weed store. She's always got her bait and not with her. Now we're both bitchy about everything.

So I think we'd get along. It's just oh my god. If she showed up to my like an improv show, just like throw things at me or bring up people I thought to embarrass me I don't know what I would do. I'm probably just too terrified Oh my god, okay, I can't think my whole stuff. All right, we have to think about it right now. Yeah, it's too much too much Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest

and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident not-so- so expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking, oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong, what would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone.

So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to I Love My Kid, but wherever you get your podcasts, you can listen ad free on the Amazon music or Wondery app. Okay, it's so too much. Going back to this show. So yeah, basically Marissa's like, I'm getting brazen on here and then um, uh, they're like life and death. We have a lot of life and stuff.

Things that make us think about a lot of things and now I love car lines. So yeah, pretty good. So she's like, yeah, he's like, your head looks beautiful like that. Because you want to come to this party with me. He's like, no, not to chance. Like, man. He's like, none of the, none of the husbands will see on this show, which I love. They're like, fuck, no. Yeah. So then we finally get to the mid-summer's party and everyone starts to arrive and Caroline

Fleming has all sorts of things, you know, putting reads in a hair with flowers, etc. And then she's like, well, one thing we're going to do is we're going to make twist bread. I'm gonna put it around bamboo and we're going to put it in the fire and they just all have to sit there to sing their bread for 20 minutes and they're all so mad that they're sitting stationary and the fire for carbs. They have this carbs. Yeah, they're like, I didn't do cos, yeah. Um, but they, yeah, they had to sit there and tell them they're all

babies breath. Oh, she's in her babies breath hot. How beautiful the breath of a baby around my forehead reminds me of a summer in here today. It's like a huge. Yeah. And then they all was cleaning a fish with a bottle of water. Did you notice that? Well, it was it was, she's, go ahead. You go, you go. No, I was just gonna say it's funny because they show her cleaning this fish

with a bottle of water and then she goes, Naja. I was like, that's a bottle of water. Uh, well, she was, it was, the fish was had been cured because it was grovelox and so she was just washing off all the sugar and salt and everything and she was like, this is all very Naja.

Oh, Naja. But then I love when they were sitting there, toasting their bread and the women are miserable She's just washing off all the sugar and salt and everything. And she's like, this is all very nature. Mature. But then I love when they were sitting there toasting their bread and the women are miserable. And, you know, Fleming hates it when people push back on her activities. And she's like, they're like, gosh, they're like, I can't believe this was going to take 30 minutes. And she's like, well, I could take 20 minutes.

I mean, when did you ever make bread that took quicker than 20 minutes? Let it take the time it takes. I love she could also. Smooth dollar of course. This is a collection of something to a million ages, but it's made of carbs, so I can get near hat. It's so piece of cake.

It's so piece of cake. Yeah, it's so piece of cake. It's strange to be raced in a bread dick over the fire. I mean bread stick. By the way, I thought that looked so much fun and so delicious. I'm like, I thought that looked so much fun and so delicious. I'm like, I wanna have some fresh toasted bread. Well, come on, Everbean.

We can make some bread in the whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole whole I feel like I'm in Coachella. I'm like, this is not what I thought Coachella was. If I thought Coachella was supposed to be like a bunch of inseparable basics, just high on. Who knows what, listening to EDM and waiting for Beyoncé to come out on stage. Yeah. She's like, did he see my comment? I'm like, oh, Coachella, whoa. You guys have been to the Bob Secret tips.

Wait a second, Julia. I think you're making this up. No, there's great. Her version of Coachella is basically a girl I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that.

I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that.

I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say that. I'm going to say was already committed so I just saw it. It's just watching Revensof coach. With her fans.

I'm Yeah, I got the CV. I'm just going to watch coach for about three days straight. That was great. I would love everyone to sit down. Okay. So everybody takes a seat when Julia and you know Juliet's there and Stambury is almost not going to wear a crown, but they are smart enough. They know they're friend enough to have made one for her. Yes. You have to sit there and do it. So they've

made her a crown. She's like, this feels utterly ridiculous. I'm so bloody happy we're on an island. So no one can see this ridiculous spectacle we're making of ourselves. Too bad their camera's there, bitch. Julie, it's like, you're like, you're like, you're like, I'm cute. She goes, you're a bitch. And then my favorite moment of the episode

was Caroline Fleming. She's getting the food ready and she tastes her grovelox. And this shot was shot from below. So you see her tending to the food ready and she tastes her grovelocks and this shot was shot from below so you see her tending to the food and the sun is just hitting her face and she takes a taste and she looks up at the sky, pauses dramatically and goes, I have felt the sea shores in my mouth to describe locks. And it is magical. No one was really into the feet.

I mean, it's basically just raw fish after raw fish after raw fish. It looks so good to me. I was like, yeah, me too. Yeah, me too. Fish, herring. By the way, while we're talking about raw fish, I forgot to tell you, huge news. What?

Wednesday is 499 sushi day at Sprouts. Just found out because I happen to be there on a Wednesday. And I know that you would appreciate that bin. So there you go. I would. That's good to know. So Caroline is talking about how she puts I put a lot of work into what I serve. I got up at 5 a.m. to cook this. Every detail is me. Some use caterers. Why would I do that? Like, she kind of even broke a little bit. It's like, why would I do that? I'm a Baroness. And Stambury, of course, like never into anything. It's not my type of feed, so I push to try and my plate and pretend. I'm like, you know what? Good for you That is called manners. You're growing. Yes, exactly. Um, and then they all dance around the maple except for Caroline She's like, I don't dance because I'm Jewish. I'm like, I didn't know you're Jewish and I have such intense Jewish pride right now

I'm like, I can't believe Caroline is one of ours. Yes. Yes. I can't I can't dance around across now if it was a stripper pole I'd be all over it reverse cowboy and what reverse reverse I'd, I'd be all over it. Reverse cowboy, anyone reverse, reverse. I'd rather, I'd rather throw myself onto a very, very blunt object. Juliet and Marissa are talking over on the side, watching, watching the maple, watching Fleming on the maple. Marissa's like, she's so famous right now. Let's start cracking up. Fleming on the maple on Marissa's like, she's so famous right now.

So, Stanberry is kind of talking about how she's going to Dubai and then and then Juliet. Julie, I mean, breaks in. She's like, oh, and Caroline, I want to ask you, do you wanna have a date night? I can't say. No. No. You gotta love or hate Caroline. And I know there's definitely two camps on this one. You have gotta appreciate someone who is just so fucking honest. She's like, I'm not sure why. My friends and family and then my bloody nemesis. No, she goes. Let me see if I have time. My friends and family and then my bloody nemesis. She goes, let me see if I have time.

No. I've never worked on a relationship this hard, even with someone I'm dating. Why would I? So good. I know, and Julie is kind of gobsmacked. And they in fact have like a, it's like a dun dun dun. And when they come back, Julie can't even get a clarification really like a it's like a dun dun dun and when they come back

Julie doesn't even get a clarification really because then carol is like you know It's like this one over here Adella She's also a problem and then it just is like what we're just gonna pivot on to Adella instead Yes, she went it's like she was good doing the fuck you fuck you fuck you You're okay. Thank you. She was doing that. She's like, well, Sophie, we had our issues and I feel like it's somewhat better now. And Adella, you know, we've had our issues and you know what, I still have issues in my head. And you, and she's like, wait a minute, you still got issues with me. What's that? I'm just gonna take longer. It's my feelings. It's in my head. I'm just gonna go, what's the issue?

It's like, you stabbed me a lot, and I still have those feelings. Well, I liked when Carol Lyon says, you know, I brought, she basically says I brought you onto this TV show, right? She was like, I brought, I brought you on here, and I wanted to have the best two months ever, and instead, you ruined it it and Adele was like, well I'm sorry but life doesn't work like that. And he goes, why not?

I want to have a good two months and therefore I shall have two months. Yes, and she says things that are so insensitive but they're true so you can't get mad. Like she said, well I have a lot to say to you, but the moment I tried, you dissolve into sobs. It's like, I can't. I can't. But Caroline, her children are being taken away. Everything's like going to sit and she's like, well, can I fight with you or not? Are you going to stop solving about children? Oh my God. I know. She is harsh.

She is really, really harsh, but that's what I love about her. And she's like, we have a right to our feelings, which was hilarious coming from her. And then Jules is like, oh really? Of course, privately. But she's like, oh really? Caroline, your life is hard.

Oh, boo, boo, it's so hard for you. And then Dallas is like, she's a lot of the coolant's vacation. That is the number seven. What is this really? So Adela storms off. And Sophie tries to get her shoes. And then, Stambury is still going off on the other girls. And she's like, I felt like it was a good gang.

And they were all going up against me and the only friend I had was my makeup artist which is pretty fucking sad Lucas like okay Bad news man Luke just do them seven three the tens oh great there goes my only friend Did he hire a backup first? Valentina find me a new friend Pauline pretend to be Luke. Put on a nice kibble sweater. So Sophie runs after Adele, who's under a gazebo. A very well lit gazebo. They're like, all right ladies, if anyone's gonna fight and

need some time to solve or throw things, there's a very well lit gazebo over here. Please feel free to solve over here. But she runs over to the gazebo. And Sophie follows her because now Sophie is in full on protect, stand-bury mode. And she's like, don't run away. She's not even saying anything that's that big of a deal. I'm like, she kind of is.

And they just work this out. And what happened to the rental castle that was so beautifully shot. And it was so touching at the end when everybody decided they really loved each other and they were friends and all this stuff. Right. So I decided that was bullshit. Didn't like it. Clear it. Clear the healing. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, so if he basically somehow manages to convince Adele to sort of, I don't remember if she convinced Adele to come back or if Caroline went up over there to talk to Adele some more, but either way Caroline. It's just saying stay and work it out, but then that's when she pissed Adele off because Adele said it's hard to trust her because she attacks Stambrane, expects support, and

then suddenly she's standing up for her Yeah, me while Fleming is like I can't believe that they would fight during mid summers How unlucky am I to have fighting during mid summers Can't we even have one glorious dinner and Julia's like I'm having the most glorious time ever. Well, then cheers to you, little one, little funny face to one at the end with the simplistic palette. I like when they're so Julia eating like a tiny bite of the raw fish.

And she's like, it's okay. I did it. I ate it. I did it. It's okay. I did it. I ate it. I did it. It's okay. It's okay. Everyone I did it. Congratulations, Julie. Congratulations. So then, so Adela and Caroline are now talking in the gazebo. And of course, Adela, she just does the first natural thing, which is to row. So if you under the bus, like, well, Sophie said you were texting awful things about me. To her. I was like, oh my goodness, here we go again. Yep. And she said, she said you were writing awful texts about me about choosing money over my children.

Stambury is just like blink, blink. Like she doesn't deny anything. She's just staring at her. And she's like, then they cut to the car talk where Sophie's like, I think it's just awful and I can't even bear to talk about the messages. Yeah. We learn the backstory is that Sophie was in a really desperate place when I was at the height of my addiction And I was gonna do something to her. I was like, oh my god

Are you gonna say that you did like porn or something like that? And she's like I went back to my second ex and about my first X didn't like my second I can't see my children. I ruined everything So what I am gleaning from it because it's British and they Very you've mystically stated was that the second X he's like a terror and awful and she went back to him because he's rich and he was Absolutely hideous to the children. Yeah, she took money from him or something. Yeah, and then yeah, and then the kids hated him So they felt betrayed and then the dad used it against her and blah blah blah Which yes, it's very sad, but it's also really hard to watch because she's just such a mess. And what Stanberry is saying to her is just brutal.

I mean, it's on TV and it's just fucking brutal. But I got her point at the same time when she was saying, well, life is about choices, it's a teller. And she goes, yes, but I'm trying to pick up the pieces from those choices. And I understand I'm in mistakes, but I'm picking them up. And she, Sanbury says, when she was an addict, it was almost forgivable because she had an excuse.

But now I think she needs a slap of reality. And then she's like, I brought you into this group. And you fucked me, basically. You saw how upset I was, and you kept going. And I can't even have this conversation with you because you stopped blubbering about lawyers. And Adela knows that she can't do that now because she's about to.

And so she's like, oh, then I fucked up. She's, you know, it's so harsh, but what Stambury said is true. She basically took her friend who was a complete mess, didn't have a job, didn't have her own money and just completely fucked her own life. And she's like, look, I'll get you a job on this TV show. And I get disagreeing and having natural disagreements in your friendship. But Adela was coming from a place like, this is a housewife show.

I need to be my own character to give another season. And I will stand up to Caroline's, Danbury, even though anybody else won't. Yeah, and... And yeah, basically Caroline was like, you know what, you really hurt my feelings, and and then she was like, I didn't, that was a big deal, and she said, well, to me it was, and it was like, oh, I didn't realize, okay, well, I'm sorry, and Caroline was like, listen, I would have told you this earlier, but you're going through so much shit It felt really petty for me to be like, oh my little heart, you know, like oh you hurt my feelings But now I'm be honest, you're telling you you hurt my feelings and then somehow they're like, oh, okay

Stiff up a lip and all that and then then they're like okay, everything's fine and yeah kind of she's like look Adela Look Adela. I love you and we've been together 20 years Which is more than most marriages. And I'll always love you. But you know, I'd say it. And she's like, so we can put this to bed. I'm sorry. And Stamberg has end me.

She goes, you can say I'm sorry, not just end me. She's like, I'm sorry. So they return to the table, but Adele says by. And she leaves. And then they show her just sobbing. I was I felt so sad for her or thing. Yeah. Well, yeah, there was a pretty interesting episode and very sadly at the very,

very end, we saw that Caroline Fleming's dad passed away about a week ago. So, uh, this show, I know And right after they show that right at, they end up with Fleming go, they can have all their drama, but I'm not going to let it influence in any way, my magical evening now. Can I put my balls in your mouth? She starts fitting like little balls she made. And then it's like, the dad's dead.

It's like, oh great, God. I know. So next week, oh great God. I know. So hey. So next week is the season finale. I don't know if it's going to be the series finale because everything right now feels like it feels like they're just tying up every single loose end that the show has ever had. Hopefully not.

Hopefully they'll find a way to bring Caroline back, contrive some reason for her to come back for the summer. But yeah, it's only two months. I mean, this shows shoots even less than most of the others. The others shoot three or four months. And this one only shoots two. She said last night. So yeah, so she could do it. She can do it. Because we don't need. I mean, if Marissa moves, Marissa's already moved to your L.A. So that's fine. We don't need Marissa back, but we'll take, but we need Caroline. So anyway, let's just all savor what time we have left

with ladies of London shall we and any other thought is heartbreaking. So everyone thanks so much for listening. Tomorrow we are back to talk. Summer House with Katie Kazzorela, our old chum Katie. with Katie Kazzorella, our old chum Katie. She always has a lot of funny and bold things to say. She's actually on next week also for a bonus episode where she is going to be giving us all the gossip on Raya Keri and her castmates on her new e reality show. And your Landa Fasta. Oh yeah, some good stuff.

We already recorded the bonus episode. So thanks everyone for listening. We love you all. And we'll talk to you tomorrow. Bye. Bye, everybody. Hey, prime members. You can listen to Watcher Crappens,

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