Watch What Crappens - #411 PumpRules: The Missing Daryls

Episode Date: March 14, 2017

LaLa returns to SUR after spending time with her mama, and Tom and Katie learn the limits of Venmo. Also, there are surprise triplets on their way! Or are there? Ooooohhh. Enjoy! Subscribe at... http://www.patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens for bonus episodes, ringtones, and live group video chat parties. Also, check out Ronnie’s new TrashTalkTV RHOBH Audiobook podcast at tttv.podbean.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crapens add free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. To talk to other crapman's listeners about the shows as they air, come over to facebook.com-watch what crap ends that's patreon.com slash watch what crap ends. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned.
Starting point is 00:01:07 Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. We've learned you've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned.
Starting point is 00:01:16 Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned.
Starting point is 00:01:24 Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Yes, we've learned you've learned. Miss Madonna Hines, match with a 6-City. We love you girls. Hello and welcome to the Watch What Crappens Podcast. A podcast dedicated to all that crap we love to talk about on ye old brawms. I'm Ronnie Karen from Trash Talk TV's Real House,
Starting point is 00:01:40 while Zabemily Hills audiobooks podcast. I know it's an mouthful. And the Rose Pricks Bachelor podcast. And I'm with my little bestie and my little mate for podcasting life, Ben Mandelker of the beside blog and the band to Blinda. We're like two Elbatroses. Girl, after just watching the end of who were two albatrosses, that's the least romantic thing I've ever heard in my life, actually.
Starting point is 00:02:05 Maybe if you were watching Planet Earth, you would have a little tear in your eye with the beauty of what I just said. But obviously you're not. You still have not watched it. Despite my greatest pleas, and you don't get the albatross references, the albatross has like a buddy, like a,
Starting point is 00:02:21 well, a fuck buddy, basically, the albatross sits there and just waits for the other albatross to come. Literally, no, like every year, they like hang out at the same tree and they do it. Oh, wow. Well, this guy got really quick. So we're like albatrossing on the podcast right now.
Starting point is 00:02:39 Well, I've always heard, you're an albatross that ran my neck, Carl. Yeah. Reliver. So that's what I think of. I didn't think of it in a romantic way. You're an albatross around my neck, Carl. Yeah, really. So that's what I think of. I didn't think of it in a romantic way. Well, that's because the albatross around your, the albatross, whatever, the burden, that is actually a reference to a famous poem called The Ancient Mariner about a guy who kills
Starting point is 00:03:01 an albatross who's trailing his ship and albatrosses are considered to be good luck to sailors on the sea. And when he kills the ship, when he kills the albatross, all sorts of terrible things start to happen to his ship. And in the end, it's like the guilt of that albatross is what follows him to his death as his ship is shipwrecked. Oh my god. And that's why people say it's like an albatross.
Starting point is 00:03:25 Wow. So don't say you never learned anything from us. Yeah. Look at that. We just like start off with some nature history, with some literary history. You know what this means? It means we're doing a late night podcast, Ronnie. Yes. And for you, it's really late. I mean, I just watched three hours of the bachelor. So my house is still spinning from all the Because it's a live one. So it's just like a whole bunch of homely women's wooing for three hours.
Starting point is 00:03:54 Woo girls. Yes, the woo girls. Wooing loudly. And you are still in New York. And so it's like what two in the morning over there one in the morning? What two? It's two fifteen. And the reason why we're doing a late night podcast is because an oral research is blowing into town and where my parents live, a crow sits on a tree branch and basically we lose power. So I was concerned that we would lose power tomorrow when we do our podcasting and the last thing we want is for the people to go without a Vanderpump rules recap. Yeah, especially in episode that starts with 10 days to the wedding.
Starting point is 00:04:35 Wait, did she not actually say that I was just written on the screen? No, I think it was written on the screen. But whenever something's written on the screen, I say it in my head in China voice. Because she's probably the one operating in the car on the screen, but whenever something's written on the screen, I say it in my head in China voice. Because she's probably the one operating the car on the machine. Like, 10 days at the wedding. You know that she insists at home and reads those out loud to herself. Time is to the wedding. Right.
Starting point is 00:04:58 And then she looks at the printed canvas of shade looking away from her. There's a there's a day for every single cocktail on the menu. I think I'm going to just try one of each of the prime cocktails. Did you notice that she had like a different print to canvas today? It seemed like there was a different like a bigger one and even bigger one staring at her. Well, the two theories, one that she might have a seasonal collection. And so she rotates them in as this even change and to as she suspects that she is drifting up drifting away
Starting point is 00:05:33 She puts out a bigger and bigger print of canvas hoping to woo him back from the studio It's a legend this quote unquote studio look Shay look at the printed canvas. You're even farther away from me now She's just crop yourself bigger this quote unquote studio. Look, Shay, look at the printed canvas. You're even further away from me now. She's just cracked yourself bigger. Now you can't forget me even more because I'm bigger. Shay. Now what is going to leave me sitting
Starting point is 00:05:57 here alone with these printed campuses staring at me while I watch TV and read the guy runs. When I want Shay, what I do is I shine a light on the printed canvas and then aim it a mirror too. So that way a picture of Shay shows up in the clouds like Batman. Shay, man. That's so much for seeing that I think.
Starting point is 00:06:17 Well, actually, I can imagine her holding up a mirror to the print of canvas, thinking that it would reflect into the sky. And there's no reason why I would ever reflect anywhere except into the mirror. She's a fucking idiot. That's what I'm saying. No, I'm doing. Yeah, she stands like in front of a mirror with another mirror behind her and she's like,
Starting point is 00:06:35 oh my god, look how much air I have. She's like, she's like, look at us in the cloud, she's like, I can see. So we start off with Tom, bro, playing the trumpet, learning the funeral trumpet for a baby walk down the aisle to look like a small French one, specifically, but I don't know exactly what it was, but it was brass. Katie, bro, walk faster, bro. Is that what he was playing? I just was like, no, to me, it just sounded like a random collection of notes. Yeah, I think he just found that somewhere was like, I really like expecting about her presence, bro. And then Jack's comes in and he's like, you're poor poor neighbors and Tom's like,
Starting point is 00:07:23 they love me, dude, come on. And then he made a horse sound. He's like, you're poor poor neighbors and Tom's like, they love me dude. Come on. And then he made a horse sound. He's like, look, this is the song I played every time horse face number one came home. Seriously, seriously, that's beautiful. Seriously, I'm a totally different horse face now. How could you? What does that sound make me want to meet?
Starting point is 00:07:44 With your best friend. Yeah, all those coats. So to faith. Jack, you know that faith is still walking around with that used ass caps like something smells in here. You know, she's like cleaned her base boards, cleaned her ceiling, cleaned up the fireplace. She's like, what is it?
Starting point is 00:08:03 Where is faith? Has she been demoted to Villa, Villa Blanca, or even worse sent off to the the the Vanderpump after life known as Clio? She died of consumption from that used ass couch. Never mentioned faith again, darling. She's in the upside down, which is what we call what's underneath the couch. Um, so let's see, uh, they talk about how shorts is really close to his triplet brothers. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:36 Oh, yeah. So this is not coming to the wedding. Port Tom's family. No one's coming to his wedding. Wait, well, I just want to clarify something. Yeah, yeah. We have to, we have to come clean on this one. So I don't remember if it was you or me, it was probably me.
Starting point is 00:08:48 I think someone told us that he was a trust fund baby. OK, and we posted on our Facebook, OK, without without really doing any pretty much thought into it. We were like, yeah, we heard that he's a trust fund baby. And it was like a passing thing. And ever since then, people keep on tweeting at us or messaging us being like, we don't think he has money. He has not any money.
Starting point is 00:09:09 And after this episode, they're like, if you saw this episode, you see they really don't have any money. So he's not a trust fund at all. No, he's not. Okay. Yeah, don't read. We've learned not to read too much gossip on Facebook on the actual show.
Starting point is 00:09:23 Because another thing was that Stasi was saying racist things on her podcast and someone tweeted at us that is not true you guys need to get your facts straight before you go off blabbing on the you know and they were nice about it or whatever but I was like well what's getting our facts straight like how much research do we have to do someone posted it on Facebook and then we repeated it you know what what else do you need people to do? What are probably just two? We're just a podcast, but that being said,
Starting point is 00:09:48 there is something that we did get right. Okay, and this is you, Ron, and you got the scoop on this four weeks ago. You announced on this podcast and on our social media platforms that Megan King Edmonds was joining the Real Housewives of Orange County because you got the scoop from your old queen at a bar.
Starting point is 00:10:08 Our good old source, old queen in a bar. So you got, you put it up there and like, it didn't make a ripple in pop culture. And then the dirty, which I don't really have an issue with, but the dirty dot com. They go out there yesterday and I'm like, we have just found out exclusively that Megan King Edmonds is coming back to real househouse of Orange County. I'm like, that's fine. I don't mind if you report on it, but don't act like you found out exclusively. We have this. It's been sitting up there in plain view for a month.
Starting point is 00:10:40 What is going on here, people? Always trust old Queen Indobar. He hasn't been wrong once. Yeah, it's given us a lot of dirt. But that said, Tomping a trust fund baby. OK, that did not come from old Queen in the bar. That came from Facebook. So blame Zuckerberg.
Starting point is 00:10:56 Yeah, fake news, fake news. Yeah, blame him. But the stuff about Stasi saying racist stuff, I mean, that's debatable. I read it because there's a blog post You what did she say? I didn't actually bother the reason I even read it was because during the bachelor I was going through Twitter in Ariana and Stasi are fighting on Twitter right now and Stop you know, I'm not reading Twitter right now. I'm just paraphrasing as we do
Starting point is 00:11:19 But basically Stasi's like well if your podcast was a success then maybe you'd know what it was like to make a few mistakes or something and Arianna's like, whatever, or something. So I click the link to the blog. And it's on, I think the blog is like, oh, no, she did. And it's quoting Stasi's podcast that she had with Steven from Summer House. And they're basically bitching about Oscar so white. And she's like, white is it that black people get so mad, but you don't see Asian people. Like like where's the Asian people like I mean whatever I mean, you know, just basically and she said and she said classic range of a shelter woman. Yes
Starting point is 00:12:13 She says in in the in the model log or whatever. She's like, I mean, I know like I'm a pretty 28 white privilege girl, so like whatever, so just unfollow me or whatever, but still. So, I mean, yeah, it wasn't racist, but. Maybe not racist, maybe just like tone deaf, naive. I think people sometimes, I think you have to have, the problem is sometimes things are just said poorly or they're stupid or uninformed, but it doesn't mean it's automatically racist.
Starting point is 00:12:47 It just has shades of racism to it, but sometimes it's just racially biased or uninformed or sheltered because there are actually a lot of Asian voices that are like, what about us? And there's a lot of just brown voices in general. So, brown voices. general. So Brown voices
Starting point is 00:13:06 in general B.V.I.G So speaking of Speaking of brown things let's talk about the turds. Let's talk about. Yes Let's talk about the turds on this show. So Jack's just talking about how you never know what's gonna have when you show up in Tom Sandeval's apartment. Cause one time he showed up and Tom Sandeval was giving a deep cleaning to his super Nintendo, which I didn't know if that was a euphemism for anything, but kind of sounded fun. I feel like Jack's is the only friend of his friend's circle that doesn't do shit like that when he's high on Coke.
Starting point is 00:13:46 It's like he shares his Coke with everybody and he's like, why are they cleaning so much? Well, not everybody is just used to it, okay? That's how it affects normal people, Jacks. It's like not a morning vitamin. He's like, what? So we learn a little bit about Tom Schwartz's family. I think we had heard at some point that he has triplet brothers, but this is when we learn a lot more about them.
Starting point is 00:14:04 Basically, Schwartz has triplets, triplet brothers, but this is when we learn a lot more about them. Basically, Schwartz has triplets, triplet brothers who they can't make it to the wedding because they basically, they just don't have the money to fly to this Wednesday wedding. Take off work to go live in their parents' house in the same room. And even Jack was like, they're unique, special individuals.
Starting point is 00:14:26 I wasn't sure about the same room. I thought I wasn't sure if he was just making a joke at that point, but he did say that they the triplets live in Uly, Florida with the parents. And I don't think he was joking because later he was like, now these guys all share one page. You go cell phones. So yeah, it's kind of difficult to plan things with them. Yeah. And they have a weird way to respond to things
Starting point is 00:14:46 They're sort of like It's like the essence of Tom Schwartz to still into a few words So basically Tom Sandevol and Jacks decide that they're going to Fly these triplets out as a surprise to Schwartz so they call them up and the guy that one of the triplets is like Oh, and that's sort of the way he responds to everything. Like, hey, how's it going? Oh, whoa, wow. Oh, I thought this thing was ringing in it. Wow. Someone here. Hey, guys, there's someone here. Darrell, Darrell, come on over here. From the heart. This is my brother, my brother Darrell mother brother Darrell Darrell
Starting point is 00:15:29 Darrell and Darrell and then introducing Darrell so So Santa Valls like yeah, man. We want to surprise him and then the triplets like oh is this a surprise thing? Like this is not gonna work out Yeah, bro, it's a surprise thing? Oh, like this is not going to work out. He's like, yeah, bro, it's a surprise. Uh, oh, well, should I call him and talk to him about anything? No, dude, it's a surprise. All right. So I should, whoa, email him.
Starting point is 00:15:55 No, bro. Should I put on Instagram when we're on the flight? No. So is this happening in surprise Florida? Because that's just down the street. No, man. So this is taking place in surprise Florida? Because that's just down the street. No, man. So this is taking place in, well, Paris, right? Paris, Texas.
Starting point is 00:16:11 No, bro. No one even said Paris. They're not even gonna go to Paris. We can get that. So let's see if we got this, got this right. We're gonna get on the plane, fly direct to Turkmenistan, and then wait for you to pick us up. Turkmenistan, where do you get that from how do you know what that is no we have a
Starting point is 00:16:31 front name Turkman and his brother's name is Stan so we call their house Turkmenistan is that country also whoa all right just make sure you get a ticket for Darrell and a ticket for Darrell and a ticket for Darrell you guys have ticked for Darryl. Got it. You guys have IDs. You know these guys don't have IDs. Well, they all had the same name because you know that like their parents had like triple vision when they were born. For took them about six months, we realized they were actually three unique boys. They're all Darryl and Darryl. Here's just like, what's this one's name? Darryl.
Starting point is 00:17:05 What about this one? Darryl, man. What about this one? Oh, Darryl again. I just bring Darryl over here. It does explain so much about poor shorts. It's like he just wants to be left alone, you know? It's like, yeah, bye.
Starting point is 00:17:19 Okay. Just leave me alone, bye bye. So eight days. Eight days until I'm wetting. Good. So. Uh-huh. But that's good.
Starting point is 00:17:33 How are you? So now it's time for Brad's Mades Fittings. So the girls are trying on their dresses. And Brittany. Oh my god. I was just cracking up because she just goes right up to horse face, aka Kristen, and she's like, so year that Tom Schwartz's triplet brothers
Starting point is 00:17:54 are all coming because Tom and Tom and Jacks can fly them out. Was that a surprise? Oops, guess I shouldn't tell you. She's like, what? Of course, Kristen acts like that's the biggest surprise ever. Even later in the episode when she's talking to Carter, she's like, Carter, you're gonna believe this Thomas V. E. Otter Street.
Starting point is 00:18:15 Yes, you're in your apartment. They're spying on the mic, Wes. I don't want to let study here. They're spying on the microwaves. I don't want Alexa to hear. Mm. Whispering. Alexa, stop listening to me. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:18:33 So Katie arrives with Stasi and Sheena and she's like, yeah, you know, like getting married. It's really difficult finding a dress that is equally as ugly on all of my bridesmaids. It was really hard that I'm going to look really good. Here's some leftover options for my bridal shower. So here's everything left from those burlack gifts I gave you for the bridal. The bridal thank you lunch for whatever the fuck that was. It's woodsy elegance. So you should just all be happy. You're not wearing leaves and sticks. And meanwhile, the boys are off at that one little spot at the grove. They always hang out upstairs. Just mixology. Downstairs. I think I've been there before, right?
Starting point is 00:19:19 Didn't they go there at one time? Did they can I think they went there earlier in the season, right? To consult about the wedding. Girl, they'll see anywhere on that block. Yeah. They won't stop the street. Look at this silver tiger. Let's pose in front of it. What's that store? It's like fine arts. No, it's not. Oh, Tashin. There's also, well, it's fun because they only, it really is only that like one little section that they go into. It's like, hey, do you want to go out of Marmalade across the street? No, we cannot leave the island. Bro, I'm glad we can have this conversation at the American Girl Doll Story. But if we could just walk over to mixology 101 or
Starting point is 00:19:57 Dylan's candy bar, I'd feel a lot more comfortable. I feel like I'm a foreigner in a foreign land. So basically we know what block Muhammad owns. That was the grove. So the guys are in there, they're buying candy for the wedding favors for the wedding. And so they're just kind of filling their little bags up with all sorts of stuff. And it was actually really funny and really cute.
Starting point is 00:20:21 And I love how Tom Sandevolah hates candy coins. He got so mad at Jack's for filling his bag with them. Yeah, it's like, dude, being my girlfriend, but don't give me candy cool in. Jack's like, it's the quintessential Halloween treat. And poor shorts is like, wow, picking the candy is like the only thing I got to do for this wedding. So it means a lot to me. Gum worms. No, bro. Oh.
Starting point is 00:20:52 So AF returns as Stasi enters the bridal store and she's like, oh my god. Like, I've been wanting to date, but I'm staying single AF for this wedding because single bachelor's AF at weddings they ask. Yeah, and also you probably couldn't find anyone who's going to drive nine hours up to Lake Tahoe for the stupid wedding on a Wednesday, taking up work to go on a date with you. The girls start asking about therapy, like if they have their therapies been going and stuff, which is what you always talk about with people when you're trying on your bright skin stresses, you know, and then she did block. And then she's like,
Starting point is 00:21:29 oh yeah, like, therapy, just depends on the relationship. Like, Shane, I went once, that's all we needed. We learned how to communicate and now we're done. Now we're set. See? Now, I just say things and Shane says, okay, and then we're sad. Good. And that he doesn't come home for a week and I'm like, okay, yes. But I'm really excited because he's going to write a really good backing track for me. He says it's special. It's something about like, I'm leaving you. I don't know. I sort of a down sort of theme, but I'm into it. He's remaking my favorite song. Bye, bye, bye. He's remaking my favorite chloro-saffon song. Go away. Bye bye bye. His work is making my favorite
Starting point is 00:22:05 Clara Stefan song. Go away. I like it. Stupid scene of poor thing. I feel a bad poor scene. Although her boyfriend now is really hot and I hear married. Well, good for her. And guess where I learned that face books or everybody just calm down. Okay. Yeah. Oh, you're about to get
Starting point is 00:22:24 some tweets. We have some ombudsman on our Twitter account and they are ready to correct us. Our drag turgs. Well, please do correct us because it's how we learn things, you know, I don't know. Yeah, we're like animals. We could just make up anything
Starting point is 00:22:40 and then you guys prove us right or wrong. Yeah, that's the way. We're like a living, living, I'll sit. I hear that she knows half dolphin. Okay, prove it wrong. Go to it. Yeah. Previous wrong on that one, actually, that's going to be a little challenging. So over at Sir, Katie tells Jack's that she, so Jacks is there like wiping down the bar and Katie and Shina walk over and Katie tells Jacks that you know she went on a little day now with Tom that I before she's like, yeah, I'm really feeling like a shift in Tom. I just think it's like a shift for the better and just like, you know, we just like can't be like fighting about the same stuff as always and then Shina chimes in and she's like, yeah
Starting point is 00:23:25 You know as Shady as our first year of marriage was I'm like better now than 10 years down the line with a couple of kids You know, oh my god, Shina speaking of kids don't wear a nut pregnant Yeah, but like I'm ready to go to fertility doctors Cuz like naturally buying a house and getting kids for the next step, you know, and I'll do whatever I have to do to get pregnant with kids It's like I'm a planner. That's why I plan to spend 15 years of my life as a waitress. I'm a planter That's why I plan my planting children awaiting till I grow I'm a planter. That's why I always walk around with a little monocle on a top hat on a cane And Jackson's like pretty sure she has to be in the same room to have a kid.
Starting point is 00:24:08 By the way, she actually said, specifically, she said, I've been married for two years now. So obviously buying a house and kids is the next step in our relationship. I'm like, well, maybe that's the problem. You want to buy kids? Well, in LA, what else do you do? She's supposed to stretch out her body. How she supposed to wait tables? So, so then they're like, um, they're like, where is she? And she's like, Oh, well, you know, he's been working on something special for me in the studio. I'm not worried. Yeah, guys, you know, like, I really know how Stasiasi feels now. Like I really know what it's like to feel like a fifth wheel.
Starting point is 00:24:47 I'm like, actually a fifth wheel is kind of useful. I don't think anybody would ever accuse you of that. It's like, wow, Schumann's made this ride even more stable on the freeway. No, it's never going to happen. But there is a little bit more drag. Um, so, in a strange turn of events, Lisa Vanderpump shows up at the restaurant on a horse. I'm like, wow, you're really rubbing it in an Ariana. Ariana has one moment with a horse and Lisa's like, no, I have to be the dominant animal bearer.
Starting point is 00:25:18 I'm on a horse AF, tell Ariana. My horse is still alive for 45 years Ariana. How's that feel? I was on my way to work today and I saw two horses. This is why I love West Hollywood. It's an air of mystery and surprise and horse faces are celebrated. This is why I love West Hollywood. There's so much beauty and whimsy and surprise. The people like get off our horse lady. We're trying to get it through the car. Yeah, they're like, we need to we need to have our horses so we can get away from that drag queen being behind your restaurant. our horses so we can get away from that drag queen being behind her restaurant. Magical!
Starting point is 00:26:11 They're like we'd like to report a lady who stole our horse. She said something about whimsy. She's like look over there that woman being standing up. If that's not magical I don't know what he's worth only what. Listen to that Robin remix blasting out of mother load if that's not whimsy. I don't know what is mystery So she goes inside and the proof she's working you know, she's like, yes Excuse me waitress baby come here to me Is that how high we poor the sangria? Did you pull that? She's like, now Jack stands. I'm like,
Starting point is 00:26:48 so gives the best pouring town, poor it, sexy. My cuff ruffles are getting angry at the second at that small pool. She literally said, poor it, sexy here. Yeah, she goes over to Jacks and she says, make it look sexy.
Starting point is 00:27:04 I'm like, it's the glasses I'm angry with a floating strawberry slice in it. It looks like rotting bloody fruit in the glass. There's no sex in that app lady. Okay. It looks like a strawberry committed suicide in that wine glass. Totally. So, Jack's is like, uh, hey, have you heard what sheen is up to lately? Because she's doing a rem-mertle, you know? She's like, re-mertle, what happened to the original myrtle? Was your waitress or a hostess? You know, you know, were you freeze your eggs?
Starting point is 00:27:34 Oh, fertilization. Yeah. Horses love fertilizer. Speaking of, I've got two new ones outside. It's a Rihanna around. We need to start training them to serve people. Speaking of I've got two new ones outside of seriana around We need to start training them to serve people So then jacks is I'm sorry that I've found I've found a couple who can pronounce Chilean
Starting point is 00:27:55 They're outside in the horses spring them in The horse is like I'm sorry that not everyone could be as attractive as us. She's like yeah perfect Sorry, we call it models. So then Jack's, um, Jack sells Lisa, that he thinks something's up with Shay, because he's never around and it's weird. And he goes, I've always said that she can do better as in China. I've always said that she can do better,
Starting point is 00:28:19 but I've kept my mouth shut. I'm like, well, which is it? You've always said it or you've kept your mouth shut, Jack's. Oh, I really good. It's a magic. Yeah, you can't do that with these people. But then again, you kind of have to because that's how the truth comes out,
Starting point is 00:28:34 especially with Jacks. He doesn't even need to tell the truth half the time. He just, you know, miswords things. Yeah, exactly. Darling, you have to understand. It's not my business until she makes it my business, really. Speaking of which, this is my business, get back to work.
Starting point is 00:28:54 Why have you done those olives? Hello, Fresh is the meal kit delivery service that makes cooking fun, easy and convenient. That's right. Each week, Hello, Fresh creates new delicious recipes with step-by-step instructions designed to take around 30 minutes for everyone from novices to seasoned home cooks short on time. Hello, Fresh sources, the freshest ingredients measured to the exact quantities needed, so there's no food waste. Yeah, they employ a full-time registered dietitian on staff who reviews each recipe to ensure
Starting point is 00:29:23 it is nutritionally balanced. And Mike Katie's wedding cake, it is delivered to your tourist app, special insulated box for free. And I guarantee that hello fresh would have been a better food option than whatever they get at their wedding. I guarantee it. They should have had hello fresh at their wedding. Yeah, hello fresh to the just catered this shit. Everyone has their own little insulated boxes. They can even cook it themselves because God knows who those two are going to hire. You know, actually, what's actually funny is that, uh, so I'm in New York right now and this like blizzard of the century is bearing down on us and my friend
Starting point is 00:29:58 got a hello fresh box in anticipation. And she put it on Instagram. She's like, it's a blizzard. I've got my Hello Fresh box, I am set. That's not a lot, that actually happened. Yeah, we actually use Hello Fresh and love it. And a lot of you have started using it and love it. We always know when something that we're talking about is working because you guys tweet us about it. And that's been really rad, you know?
Starting point is 00:30:21 It's like people who really like to cook but don't have time to go find all those special ingredients. The stuff is already portioned for you. It's stuff you wouldn't normally buy a lot of it. And it's fantastic. I, you know how I always talk about how Hello Fresh changed pork chops for me. And I made the pork chops. And again, and because I came to New York, so I had three left overs. So I gave it as my boyfriend. And he said he ate all three in one sitting, because they were so good. Thanks, hello, fresh.
Starting point is 00:30:48 Yeah, they're delicious. Oh, you fed my boyfriend. So for $35 off of your first week of deliveries, visit hellofresh.com and enter code crap ends when you subscribe. 35, crap ends 35 is our code. Oh yeah, crap ends 35, because you get $35 off your
Starting point is 00:31:05 first week of deliveries. Darling, visit hello fresh calm and enter crap in 35. So Stasi, Stasi is like, my friends keep telling me, I need to pick me up. So I'm going to do a photo shoot called how Stasi got her groove back. Girl, you need to do a photo shoot called how Stasi got her groove back. Girl, you need to go to Patrick's house and throw his shit on the lawn and do it right. I know. You know, it just got a so large a quinger. You need a grape. Tell him like you feel better or the Abby. Go to the Abby. All the gaze will fawn wouldn't be fun if we went to the Abby with Stasi.
Starting point is 00:31:42 Hell yeah. We would be the kids. Come to the Abbey with us. We'll put like one of those bridesmaids, you know, what do you call them? Those flowy things that they wear and the wedding, the veil. Yeah, put a bridemaid veil on you. And then you could, you'd walk in there and everybody would be like, what?
Starting point is 00:31:59 Yeah, we need to, so we actually need to go the Abbey with Stasi. The reason why is this, because we don't look like those really pretty guys. So Stasi would give us credit in terms of, like, we be hanging with a sort of famous person. And then we would give them Stasi. Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just going to end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle.
Starting point is 00:32:28 And we're the host of Wonder e's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the buildup, why it happened, and the repercussions. What deserves session with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It's snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud.
Starting point is 00:32:56 But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondering app. It's us to be there because we're going to help get a groove back just by being gay and being a rounder.
Starting point is 00:33:23 Just by being two gays. Carly looks so good. You look hot right now. Yeah, I have no groove to give. But I will go to I hop with you. We can get our groove back there. That's always worked for me. Asher.
Starting point is 00:33:40 Yeah, or a solartaquanga. But instead of all those good ideas, she's doing a new moody shoot. She's doing a budwah shoot for herself. Yeah, because you know, yeah, it's no happy with us or I hop with us. So Stasi is, she's, she's really happy that she's best friends with Katie again.
Starting point is 00:34:06 So, there's that. So Katie comes in to shoot all over the place. She's like, oh, hey, so you're doing a nude photo shoot? Um, yeah, have you written your vows yet? No, I think like Tom's are going to be better than mine. She's like, yeah, Tom's are probably going to be better. Is there anything else you wanted because I'm getting my groove back right now, AF.
Starting point is 00:34:27 So, groove as, groove AF. It's not in the heart. And she's like, yeah, I mean, remember that time, like it seemed like we would never get married. And like, I mean, it's happening. I mean, to you, not me. So there's that, but. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:42 I mean, I'm the bitch here standing in a see-through outfit Trying to get a guy, but you know good for you. You're getting married. Yeah, I'm really happy for you So are we done here because if I stand here longer? I'm gonna need like a patch me there are some things. It's just like feeling weird The longer you stand here the more I want to have wrench dressing and That's a problem because I'm naked right now in front of people. Katie's like what is? It's how I got my groove back. She's like, yes, Katie. We all have our ways, okay? Please. So back over at Sir, at least is, at least is checking on tables. Hello. How are you? Everyone okay? Everyone okay, darling. Hey darling, cuff ruffle shake. She always has, uh, well, for some reason on this show, a lot. She's always, she always has these big, roughly cuffs.
Starting point is 00:35:32 Yeah, she knows the clown cuff. Well, see, where's those big, literally, literally, literally, literally, I'm all right, everyone. I know. Welcome to see our guest. That is, uh, you can't say, I can't say circle, that's, uh, we'll see, where's those big sun hats so people won't hug her So maybe she wears those like big round cuffs so people can't like hold her hand for too long She's basically like just here to say hi don't touch me. Thank you. Goodbye
Starting point is 00:36:00 I'm wearing a stop dragon around my wrist So let's see. Brittany. So Brittany tells Jacks, are you doing all right? Other second, Grias high enough today, Jacks. And Brittany comes over and she's like, I was talking to Christian and we were talking about who's walking down the aisle with you.
Starting point is 00:36:20 And I said, well, who's going to get Tom three triplets, brothers? He's like, God damn it. What did you tell that to Kristen? She has a bigger mouth than I do. Trust me. She's put her fist in both of them. Jackson's funny because he's like, you know, he's like,
Starting point is 00:36:36 I know that Kristen just gonna go up to Tom Schwartz and be like, Tom, I know something. And he's totally right. She totally would be the death of to do that. Yes. I just like that Brittany Brittany She's you know the way she just stumbles into telling the whole lie without things Well, I was just like I was thinking I was looking there was a fly on the wall And I thought wow I wish I could be a fly on the wall on something and I like walls and walls are not clear
Starting point is 00:37:00 My my house is and I wish I could have a house someday news guy have a house someday is gonna be Katie and Tom I thought oh god, they're getting mad real soon. I wonder when brothers are gonna get there. Oh, I forgot to mention his brothers are coming. I shouldn't have said that. Should have. It's about me, a surprise. I'm sorry guys.
Starting point is 00:37:16 I like that a little bit of LA is seeping into her. Because if this surprise gets ruined, I'll be crushed. And she's like, I'll come down. You're at work. Kim saw. It's like nice. I like. Not nice when the spiritual brought me like, I learned that. Kim saw. I don't even know what you're saying. Kim saw. Kim saw. I think she's trying to like say like some spiritual end of yoga thing. Oh Come saw maybe like come saw like the rest like the French phrase like that. I don't know I don't know you can't think too deeply on Britney or your brain will start to melt in the cutest way possible
Starting point is 00:37:59 Speaking of melting things we then go over to Raquel's house up in the thousand oaks Raquel as we may remember is the daffy girlfriend of James The daddy needy beauty queen whore from up north I don't know who's there something. Yeah, and James brings sunflowers from Ralph's He's like yeah, here's some flowers my ladies mama And she's like take a good look Take a good look at these flowers before they die. Little girls. Hey, girls, look at this flowers, girls.
Starting point is 00:38:29 Here's some some flowers, me mama. And she's like, son flowers are my favorite. He's like, I had no idea. Geez, roll with it, James. I know. Geez. He's like, they were cheaper than the cake. They were cheaper than the day old cake
Starting point is 00:38:44 in the Ralph's birthday section. So I purchased them. And not even the full cake, one of those half cakes, they said, sort of strange, very American. So then I would have bought roses, but I'm almost out of the allowance that Raquel gave me for the week. By the way, Raquel, may I?
Starting point is 00:38:57 And how's your father? And then the mom's like, oh, well, he's up. He's been up in Alaska looking for grizzly birds. And recalls like, I'm starving. All right. Now, what about Rekel sister? I'm sorry, but this is this is Rekel sister's face. That's that's how her face sounds. The whole scene she's just like.
Starting point is 00:39:29 It was paused on her face actually when my dad walked in and he said, this is the face that launched a thousand boats or whatever the expression is. You're like, who's that? Who came out? My dad's like, does she know about the triplets? So James is trying to trick everybody into believing that he's so charming. He's like, Rick has my queen. And Kristen, Kristen's just like a hooker. You fuck on the hood of your car and a car park. I'm like, what you did and you realize that you partook in that, by the way.
Starting point is 00:40:04 You were in that mess. True story AF. So then the family gets to asking him exciting questions about his busing career, which is what every girl wants. I know they're like, so how's busing tables? Yeah, they're asking is if he's in law school, like, so how's it going down there at Harvard? I'm at my Harvard. I'm at busing tables at Sur. And he's like, oh, well, it's a little bit awkward, but, you know, I got a little bit fired. And then they should flash back up and be crazy. And I just loved that moment when he's drunk and he like knocks his head back he goes, PUMP TEETY! That's like an amazing moment.
Starting point is 00:40:50 I kept getting into dot dot dot situations dot dot dot Suck it girlfriend! And then the girl it ends with, I got put in a headlock at some point and the sister's like seriously But you know things are looking up I could not be more serious if I even tried Seriously a f I got a new gig at a restaurant on Melrose you know it's a new place residency doctor if you will And it's put the important things in perspective, like we're care, and like you guys, you're like a family, and I love having a family.
Starting point is 00:41:30 It means a lot to me. And then the violin start playing and he's like, it's been my summer of loss. My parents breaking up, leaving sir. And he starts crying. Oh, good. And then, you know, the mom, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, mean, I mean, I mean, I don't know Yeah, you never know with that one. He's the kind to be like I was drunk didn't count You're not gay if you were drunk You know gay if you're just long and bad and he crawls into your bed And don't even realize it and then he's up in your ass and you haven't even woken up. You know people do anything groupies groupies So I don't even believe the groupies. I have a minute my new residency. It's the best called the tube I'm sorry. That's what we called in London here. It's called subway subway. I'm a sandwich artist, but I'm also DJ.
Starting point is 00:42:29 I can't bear the fans screaming anymore. James James, please, Mo Wata Mo Wata. When the group is asked for avocado and I say that's a dull look extra girl and they say we'll take it anyway. I say, you're such a naughty groupie So over at Tom and Katie's they're packing shit for their wedding And Tom's like yeah, babe look at this sexy ass cake. I want to go American pie style on this thing It's like a great can't wait to marry you so Stasi comes over to help she's like, you don't wear flip flops when you're holding precious cargo like a cake, okay? Well, I don't think that cake was that precious, okay?
Starting point is 00:43:09 It was next to the sunflowers at Ralph's. I mean, okay, so I don't want a cake shim because I do believe that people spend too much money on their wedding cakes. I mean, you know, and not even eats the thing. So I get why you do a small cake. But I also get this feeling like all the money in this wedding is going to the flowers
Starting point is 00:43:30 and when's their wedding shit? And maybe if there was a little bit more money, they could have had a little bit of a nicer cake. I mean, it's not even that it wasn't even a nice cake is that they had to put their wedding cake and dry ice and drive it nine hours up to the wedding venue. I mean, what sort of rink eating operation is this figure? This is your wedding cake. This isn't just like, Edibles for later at the cabin.
Starting point is 00:43:52 Yeah, they got a rouse and big bear. Yeah. That will be fine, you know. So back in sir, someone, I think it's a Brittany. They're like, sir, restaurant restaurant. Ladies, how are the guys? Change balls. I'm convinced they put that in there for us. I think I am convinced. I've heard two little fakie to burritos are spreading around a rumor that we've changed the bowls to empanadas. Fix it editing.
Starting point is 00:44:24 Fix it. Fix it. So speaking of brown things, LaLa shows up in the smoking alley girl. LaLa looks like a roasted chicken in the whole foods. Poor LaLa. She airbrushed herself. I'm like, LaLa, don't worry. They do that for you on TV and post. You don't have to do it. She is. This is not the audition for Dreamgirls. Where are you?
Starting point is 00:44:46 She's on the Starlight Express. So she shows up and she encounters Ariana and she's like, Hey, I miss my mom, but I'm back here. So, hey, and Ariana is like, if this is sketch comedy, you're not taking it very seriously right now. And either one not getting the game right now or it's a year. So Lala is like, I missed you, man. Like Lala, you can't do that. You can just walk up all airbrushed and just start acting as if you hadn't, you, you, like didn't get to see her at brunch the other day.
Starting point is 00:45:18 Yeah, especially when you're like, I've been so depressed. Like I was with my mama, curled up with mama in a little mama ball. When you're actually showing up with a real tan, I mean nobody in LA has a real damn tan. We know you've been out on some Saudi boat. Why are you lying? Yeah, I was hoping that you'd be on survivor. Like maybe that explain where she was,
Starting point is 00:45:39 but I watched the season for me or she wasn't on it. I mean my mama. So, I did my mini-inil. She's like, there. I mean, my mama. So, uh... I did my amina, I know. She's like, there are 70 things I want to say to Ariana about, I want to do it on the phone. So, you know, I'm going to do it in front of these trash cans in the smoking alley.
Starting point is 00:45:54 I wanted to see a serious I am. Yeah, no, that's... Whenever someone says that, whenever somebody is way overdue and someone says, well, I didn't want to do it over the phone. That's bullshit. It's 2017. You can talk on a phone. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:09 She wouldn't have even answered it anyway. Who answers their phone in 2017? You should have just done it with emojis like every other adult. Yeah. And Lala's like, listen, listen, you've always been a really good friend to me. And even when I'm needing my mama, you've been such a good friend. And I know I'm very difficult. And you have to be really nice to want to hang out with me. So it's crying. I was like, yeah, I mean, I want to
Starting point is 00:46:36 give her a chance. But like, I mean, you can't just roll up like nothing happened. And then suddenly you're like, Brown, I'm like, what? Like this thing is everything. But you know, you're so tan. Give me some of your tan. But I didn't watch what happens live tonight, but they both were on it. And they both seem very, very chummy. And I also feel like that bodes well for Lala because if Lala is having her
Starting point is 00:47:00 comeback episode, which is really her goodbye episode, and then she's appearing on watch her happens live and makes me think, you know, Bravo is behind Lala. That's what that says to me. And I'm hopeful I will be back for sure. Yeah, I think Lala will be back because she was brought in as like the younger crew. So I think James and Lala will be back next year. And I predict that a couple of these old hags will be gone, not you, Ariana, but like just the general cast, I think a couple of the oldies will be gone. Because I mean, how one can they continue? They're going to be 50 by the time this shows done shooting. Yeah, they need to start breeding bringing in a new generation. Well, we do have that other girl. The girl who couldn't remember the
Starting point is 00:47:36 menu last week. I don't remember Katie. Yeah, I'm guessing like that. Bring out a Malik. Katie O'Malley. Yeah, you got to work on it. But either way, so Lala's like, I'm officially in to, I'm coming in to officially let Lisa know I won't be hostess again anymore. Thanks, Lala. Everyone was waiting with Betty breath. Wes down the crows. Miss Kent is back.
Starting point is 00:48:07 Lala adopts her baby boys for Lisa. She's like, Hey Lisa. Why that happened to you, Lala? I like that Lisa never has any gentle moment ever. She's like, listen up little hoe. You're a little hoe and that's the business to get tossed around like a like a boat in the ocean Then you get your little tepans and you go on Hug me and remember don't carry arbitrauses behind that boat
Starting point is 00:48:36 Otherwise, I'll be shipwrecked like the engine bow and uh So she's like I'm like I just getting this mindset And it's like my biggest flaw. And I like shut down. I just do what I want to do. And she's like, it sounds like you're proud of this mindset. She's like, no, but like what I'm saying is I own it, which is the wrong thing to say to Vanderpump. You don't see. You got Bravo. Yeah, wrong thing. Yeah, Lala is talking, I mean, when people talk about millennials, about the downside of millennials, this scene is sort of epitomizes all of it.
Starting point is 00:49:15 This is the thing that everyone hates about millennials, or so they claim. You know, they're like, oh, I just, I shut down. I just need to go back to my family. I just need to be with my family. And, you know, it doesn't matter. I suffer from such anxiety and no pill can save me. Only my family can save me.
Starting point is 00:49:32 And I'm like, I know that I know people really do suffer from serious, serious anxiety. But when you suffer from serious, serious anxiety, usually you need a pill. It's not just your family. Usually your family is what's causing it. Usually people who have that much anxiety aren't on Snapchat all day. They're usually more nervous. But I'm, you know, I'm still for Lala. So when she says she has anxiety, I'm like,
Starting point is 00:49:55 okay, you have it. She's like, I just needed my mama and a really good son, Tan. And then, you know, that gives Lisa a chance to go into her after everything Ken and I have done for you, Lala, which is like your favorite thing to say, you know, yeah, and Lisa is like, we were screwed by Lala, but then Lala says, I don't think, Lisa was, her one of her issues was that Lala just left and didn't say anything, and Lala was like, well, I don't, I don't think anybody is worth to hear about my life. I don't think anyone's worth, like, yeah. Anyone is at the level yet where they need to hear about my life.
Starting point is 00:50:30 And they say, well, that's fine. Keep it private, but don't lie about it. And then this is when Lala's like, I suffer from anxiety. It's just a fact of life. And then as soon as she said that, that's when Lisa's bottom lip just curled down. And I was like, bro, can bet my favorites.
Starting point is 00:50:49 She tastes broken to me, darling. Let me ask you this, Lala. How do you feel about having a mortifying sweater put around you and living at Villa Rosa? You can sit on my lap. I miss you. This, how do you feel about this, Lala?ala, being called snooki from now on. How do you feel about me dying part of your hair, a colour that is totally inappropriate, and then spitting you in her tiny little blazer, and just humiliating you on a daily basis with Ken? How do you feel about Ken carrying you around the restaurant to say hello to fans? Do you have any serious fears of
Starting point is 00:51:26 swans? I love when I love when Lisa turns it turns sir into like this really difficult job. She's like sir survived without you before you and after you. Mike oh yeah sir just you know fighting along trying to you know name those table numbers Do you know Lala that since you've been gone we've introduced a cabbage soup do you We did that without you Oh And then Lisa's like her entire strategy has been young and pretty that won't last now Luller You need to hook up an old slettie man with terms of money Focus darling
Starting point is 00:52:15 Mom was like so I guess I still fired go go now go on But keep in touch Yeah, that was a key when she said keep in touch. Yeah, that was the key. That means that I think there's hope for a Luller. Yeah, me too. Did you did you hear a buzz come on because I turned on a fan. It's kind of hot in here. No, I did not and don't talk to me with your heat. There's a snowflake somewhere on coming down outside my window. Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm coming back L.A. I swear, I'll be back on Thursday. Oh, so let's see. So Tom and Katie are driving up to Tahoe and Tom's like, yeah, you know, I love I love road trips because you know Katie, Katie drives insist that she drives, which I don't
Starting point is 00:53:02 really like anything to say that actually. I just think it's sort of funny. She wants to see your change of tire. Uh, Christen and Carter, this is when Christen and Carter are packing in their house. And she's like, I didn't tell you about Schwartz's brothers. They're coming. It's a surprise. I wasn't supposed to tell you they're gonna cry. You whispering. You're in her house. I wasn't supposed to tell you they're gonna cry. Why are you whispering?
Starting point is 00:53:26 You're like, how's it? I know that you're such a blabbermouth, always talking all the time. You're just gonna keep your mouth shut just this one time. And Carter's like, it's so exciting talking to the dog. It's so exciting. Oh, Carter, you're such a worse. He's like, listen, I had my one line about Sia and that's it. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm set for the season. Yeah, I'm not saying any more lines that you tell me to say to your ex-boyfriend in an elevator, you fucking freak.
Starting point is 00:53:52 Now, will you pay for my lunch yesterday? So, Cady and Tom, Cia bear on the side of the road, which is exciting. And then they arrive at this place, like the 20 mile house or something like that. And the guy who runs the place, Kevin, he sits down to Katie and Tom, and he shows them the bill, and he's like, and they just go through all these expenses, including an extra $10,000 for flowers, to which Katie just sheepishly turns to Tom and goes,
Starting point is 00:54:18 sorry. I'm like, bitch, you are lucky, you are still getting a ring on your finger at the end of all this. But it's our wedding, and I wanted it to be perfect. And I wanted certain things. Well, enjoy your matzab wedding cake because that's as big and it is a slice of matzab.
Starting point is 00:54:36 So is 50 grand a lot for a wedding? It doesn't seem like it's a lot. I don't. Well, I think it's, it doesn't seem like a lot for TV. I think for other people, it's a lot. I think it's a lot of money. I mean, it's a lot for a Wednesday, a Wednesday wedding. It's a lot of money. Yeah, that's true. And also those cabins are kind of ghetto. Those aren't like nice. They're not like glamping, you know what I mean? Yeah. It's like, would the elegance that, that shit? I don't know where all the money went to I think because they I feel like they also like Ran it out those cabins for everyone else and you know, I get it when weddings can well
Starting point is 00:55:11 It's all catering because he said $4,000 was for rehearsal dinner and there was another four grand for the buffet So that's eight and then eight right there yeah 10,000 on the flowers and then there was like four or something for, there's something for like the cabins that they rented out. All I have to say is I feel like money was mismanaged. So Tom Katie cabin, Katie, I can't find my checkbook, but I can do like Venmo, like no, you can't. You can't. Ben Moe somebody 30 grand. Yeah. I actually really felt bad for Tom Schwartz because he's like $20,000, Boba. That's the amount of debt I owe for my student loans. I could write this check and just be debt-free. But in stand, I'm spending it on flowers and I'm standing it on flowers and or derves. I was like, that does suck. That really sucks.
Starting point is 00:56:08 Yeah, at the end of the day, you get Katie. So then this Bill guy, the guy, I just call him Bill, because he's asking for money. But this Bill guy just comes right on over. It's like Jesus, breathe down my neck much. Yeah. And then Tom's like, you're expensive, but I love you. And it was worth it. And you drink some straight whiskey. Yeah. Yeah. She's like,
Starting point is 00:56:31 it's okay. The time they get married. Listen, we'll have, we'll be poor for a little bit, but it's fine. We'll just get by on iceberg lettuce. So Stasi comes in, um, padding. She's like, I need a big hug. We lost our service for an hour and Rachel and I like, seriously, literally almost died AF. Yeah. She's like, we navigated by looking at stars. Weirdly enough, we found like a baby in a manger with three wise men around it. They told us where you guys were. And there was an albatross following us. She's like, uh, we see a flashback to them in the car. And she's like, I can't die single. back to them in the car, and she's like, I can't die single. There's so many things I haven't done. I've never had a threesome.
Starting point is 00:57:12 And then the best part of that one cared. Yeah, she's like, it was an experience and no one cared. They cared more about the bear that kid he saw. So in the morning, they're cooking, and Kristen's like, that literally smells like anus She is awful Literally literally smells like it seriously anus seriously you can serve me anus That's most seriously literally like literal anus seriously a
Starting point is 00:57:40 Are you cooking pork butt because that's like a nice smelling seriously seriously? So this is when we find out none of shorts is family is coming which is so sad his dad can't come because he's Lala apparently That has anxiety and then the brothers are poor and the sister has to work poor Tom Yeah, I feel actually really bad I sort of I actually feel like I understand him, which is that he's probably spent his whole life going, okay, well, that's fine. And quietly resenting everyone until he's snapped when he gets really drunk. Makes sense.
Starting point is 00:58:12 Now I know why he's with Katie. And yeah, literally it smells like anus. It's felt like a good way to end that. So Jackson Brit speaking of smelling literally like anus, Jackson Brit are getting ready. And Jackson's really excited about this like brother thing for whatever reason, but he does not trust that they're going to make it. Jackson's kind of like the psychic of this episode. He knows they can come in. Yeah. Well, especially because there's already been one bad omen, which is that Tom
Starting point is 00:58:37 Tandeval missed his flight out of Burbank because he had to go back home because he left his suit, which is pretty shocking that Tom Tandeval would leave a suit behind. So he missed his flight. So that already does not vote well. Yeah. So she and I say, this is a pretty sad scene. Yeah. She's like, oh my god, I'm so excited. And Kristen asked if there's anything like specific that you need. Meaning like Diet Coke, you know, like, what can we get him? And he's like, um, like, I mean, like Diet Coke, you know, like what, what can we get him? And he's like, um, like I have like no desire to drink and party. So he's like, I'm over everyone. She's like, Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:59:13 Hey, how's this look? He's like, what is that? He's like, I said, jumpsuit. He's like, I don't know what half the things are. They're in the laundry pile. Yeah, I do your laundry and half the things I don't even know what they are. He hates her so much. Are you gonna go tubing with us? As long as I can hang myself with a fucking tube. Oh, that's fine.
Starting point is 00:59:35 So meanwhile, Lisa Vanderpumper arrives in Tahoe on a private plane with Ken and also Pandy and and husband of Pandy. And she checked, they check in at this hotel and the gay at the hotel is so excited to be checking Lisa's at the pub. He is so thrilled. He's calling all over himself. And she's pulling out all her old lines for the gay guys. I'm like the gay band.
Starting point is 00:59:57 She's like, where's the nearest Chanel gay person? He's like, oh my God, you're fat. Oh my god. You're fabulous. Well, there be diamonds nearby. Oh my god. Is there a pool filled with champagne? Homosexual person. She's so fabulous.
Starting point is 01:00:15 Everything. You're all over that. Now, let's go into this cabin. This wood cabin. I'll see if anyone's getting wood in this cabin. Am I right, gay friend? I like when he goes. Okay, you guys are in the terrace suite and that's next door in the terrace suite building. Way to make him feel special, buddy? That's so funny.
Starting point is 01:00:46 Did you say, Tera's sweet or Tera's sweet? Oh, Lisa Vanderpump. You are incorrigible. He's like, would you like to go hiking? She's like, the last time I went hiking, it was at Neiman Marcus, darling little Helmo. He's like, oh. I mean, she was really going for all the low A. Really?
Starting point is 01:01:08 Would you like to keep your room? Last time I needed a key was when I had special access to Bloomingdale's. Oh, he was like so excited. That was so cute. It was. She gets to the room when she's like, it's better not be a, oh, this is lovely. Yeah, I mean, it's different to other rooms I've stayed in, but even if you're in a bloody tree house, you shut up and deal with it.
Starting point is 01:01:33 It's all about the ride. Oh, look, she got me pink towels. So that was nice. Poor Kate. Yeah. Have a son. Get on the bed. Go to sleep.
Starting point is 01:01:43 Poor Kate, we've been working on more effort into that than anything. That's where the budget went. I've got to release the bed, go to sleep. Okay, the little man's more effort into that than anything. That's where the budget went. I've got at least a van to prom's room. Yeah, that was the other $30,000. It's a Wednesday wedding and this is the best they could find. You can't be telling me that President just we just booked tonight. Obama's here.
Starting point is 01:02:01 So she's, the can is like leaning back on the couch, you know, just kind of rubbing his belly. And she's she's next to him talking and she's like, darling, can you believe it's happening? It is. And I'm bloody or dating it. And he's like, well, I've seen him chicken out with all I like, well, the early, the sun, Grilla, and then that time is broad- bartending at pump. I see him chicken out. I'm gonna be so sure it's happening. Yes, marriage is much harder. Okay, Buddha can. At that point, which point, Lisa Lisa Van from then looked at her room, can say, make it sexy.
Starting point is 01:02:50 Don't think you're getting any action just because we're in a hotel room. And then the gaze down on the bottom floor like, you're so fabulous. So then back at back at the camp site, the rest of the gang shows up, you know, Sheena, Shay, Ariana, etc. Not Tom, because he missed his flight. And this is when we find out that those triplets for whatever reason they missed their flight. And now Jackson started for the case.
Starting point is 01:03:22 I have to call sand of all. I have to call sand of all. I have to call sand of all I have to call sand of all I have to call sand of all. Well what's he going to do? Well, maybe I have nothing it probably had nothing to do the twins. You just had like a fashion question.
Starting point is 01:03:35 We got a stain. Oh, well, so next week is a big wedding. Yeah, big wedding, but interestingly and enough, it's not the season finale. It doesn't look like though, it looks like you're going to have two episodes of wedding. It looks like next week is going to be two being in stuff. And then I'm sure I'm sure I'm going to leave off like right before the wedding and the
Starting point is 01:03:57 episode after that will be the wedding. I'm a little concerned that next week may be a little bit of a dud episode though. It doesn't look that fast. They haven't had one yet this season. It's been a great season. I don't think they have. But yeah, we'll be here for that. I mean, it'll be a dud marriage, but you know,
Starting point is 01:04:14 we can only do that. We can do it so much. Okay, and win episode. Okay, experience. Everybody, thanks so much for listening. This has been a fun late night. We will talk to you tomorrow for the summer house season finale. Oh no.
Starting point is 01:04:32 Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no.
Starting point is 01:04:40 Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Power's on this week's real housewives of Beverly Hills, which we will discuss tomorrow. Talk to you then everybody Bye Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about
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