Watch What Crappens - #421 PumpRules: Loving You Schwartz and All

Episode Date: March 29, 2017

Bubba finally adds Schwartz to her name and Lisa Vanderpump gives TomTom direction. Enjoy! Subscribe at http://www.patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens for bonus episodes, ringtones, and live group ...video chat parties. Also, check out Ronnie’s new TrashTalkTV RHOBH Audiobook podcast at tttv.podbean.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crapens add free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. To talk to other crapman's listeners about the shows as they air, come over to facebook.com-watch what crap ends that's patreon.com slash watch what crap ends. Yes, we'll bring you what happens. Oh, but we won't bring you around. Kick the squad, have to expect this so much that happens. Watch what crap ends would like to thank its sponsors, Christy Doherty, and Mia Hansen-Loha,
Starting point is 00:01:16 and our very special super-subscranis sponsor, Miss Madonna Hines, Mad with a sexy T! We love you girls. Hello and welcome to the Watch What Crappin's podcast. The podcast about all that crap we love to talk about on Yeo-Broves. I'm Ronnie Carram from Trash Talk TV and the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills audiobooks on iTunes.
Starting point is 00:01:43 And I'm here with the gorgeous, talented, very thin-faced Ben Mandelker of the Beside Blog and the Banta Blender Hello Bean. I'm sorry I still have a tear in my eye from last night's beautiful beautiful wedding ceremony. Excuse me. I still have a tear in my eye from watching Shay get his drug supply money cut off. That's like that poor guy. What's he going to do? Oh, what's he going to do? What's he going to do when Shina comes for you?
Starting point is 00:02:14 He didn't even take that opportunity to get a bus boy job. I mean, he had years. Years and years. Oh, well, hi, everyone. Hi, hi, hi, hi. Hi, hi. Hi, hi, hi. Hi, hi. Yeah, today is all pump rules season finale edition. So excited. By the way, next Tuesday, our friend,
Starting point is 00:02:32 Marcos Louisvanois is coming on to talk the end of pump rules reunion. So everyone gets out of Marcos because he's an angel, an angel walking on the earth. He is an angel. We love Marcos. And I'm like loving Bravo this week. This was a whole it shouldn't it shouldn't have been a hilarious episode, but it was hilarious. hilarious. He's an alley always. It always is. And it's really fun because this one everybody was in a super good mood because they were in a wedding. And so they felt like they had to make up.
Starting point is 00:03:02 So they're all were all these like making up up moments which didn't last past that day. Let's also not forget that they were all so super happy that DJ James Kennedy wasn't there for Lala. I'm certainly not very happy about that. I wasn't. I wasn't. What the hell? Why me?
Starting point is 00:03:19 They were happy. They were having a bar remix of like a Paris running cinematic moment mixed with like some Lala overdubs. What the hell? I think they just couldn't bring him in because they had spent so much money they couldn't afford a pizza oven for him to stand in front of. Well he may have had a long standing date with Rick Hell's family up in a thousand oaks. Rick Hell and her mother. thousand oaks. Raquel and her mother. Hamdini! So someone posted a picture last week of Lisa Van der Pum stressed from the back which we didn't see and it looks like she's naked. It looks like a completely see-through
Starting point is 00:03:54 dress and I was like oh no girl but it wasn't. Okay it was just a it was just white so I think it just looked pasty. But I like that Lisa Vanderpump wore her most mournful brown dress to this occasion She wore what they used to wear and sail them when they were getting burned as witches Yeah, I think she was she was ready to To release some sort of puritanical justice at that moment. Yeah, that was like a Salem witch trial, Keenzenyara dress, you know. Yeah. It's bad when she doesn't, you know,
Starting point is 00:04:28 make an excuse to wear a pink. You know, it's really bad. Well, for some reason, she's kind of coming away from that. Haven't you noticed? Like lately, the season, she's worn pink a little bit, but she's in a lot of black. Yeah. The season, her thing is like see through lace.
Starting point is 00:04:44 That's true. See through lace and she likes wearing a little black bass with a ruffle with a ruffle cuff underneath it. Yeah, I'm the black lace and like ruffle cuffs. Yeah, ruffle cuffs. It's weird. Like those. But no ruffle. Was there a ruffle cuff on this dress?
Starting point is 00:05:00 I didn't even notice. This had those long witchy sleeves. You know that you that hang down. Like, that singer, he used to be married to the guy with ball cancer. Lance Armstrong. What's that singer's show? Cheryl Crow. Cheryl Crow came out with those, those sleeves that work as like toilet paper as well.
Starting point is 00:05:18 Yes. I do remember that. Yeah, it's like that. No, I do feel like you're going to a Vanderpump rules wedding So you know you're gonna have to clean up shit at some point. Yeah, yeah I do feel like she needed a flower crown or something and and you know she and to like maybe maybe like What's her name Diana Diana and like Natasha whatever her her ladies her her manager ladies They could all just do a little
Starting point is 00:05:45 spring dance, Caroline Fleming style, but around a cauldron and then the witchcraft could begin. Although I guess she's doing the witch hunt, I consider doing both the witch hunt and the witchcraft. We are gathered today to celebrate the marriage of Katie to Satan. to say ten. Okay. So he's like, Brown, her and Ranchant burn her at the stake. It'll be delicious. Chef Joe, come try this. It is kind of funny that Katie got married at a ranch.
Starting point is 00:06:17 Yes. Very on the nose. Literally, she probably had ranch on her nose. Um, so anyway, so the episode begins with the procession, which we saw a little bit of last episode, but this time they did slow and beautiful like. And so Lisa comes in and her witch on to fabulous gown. And then we just see everyone else coming through. And of course, as we mentioned last week, Lisa got so excited when she saw butter and gordo the two dogs.
Starting point is 00:06:46 She's like puppies. I feel like that's not what you want to name your dogs when you want to lose weight. Butter and fat. Yeah. Anyone who lives in Austin probably when they think of gordo they are not they're not thinking of something slimming. Yeah. I've only thought during this procession was wow.
Starting point is 00:07:04 Why do poor dogs look so much grosser than rich dogs? Because Lisa's dogs look so nice and their dogs look so matted in like dirt. Yeah. Well, some people have to go to, you know, Chateau, what was it called? Remember, it was on Tabitha. This is a Bravo reference, actually. It was on Tabitha takes over.
Starting point is 00:07:24 She, Chateau mermaut. Oh my god. it was on Tab feel like someone commented somewhere that it was $15,000, but you know what? Like every time we mentioned information, we sort of gotten passing from Twitter or our Facebook feed. There's always someone who comes up and just like absolutely tears us a new one for being so erroneous and not fact-checking. So a totally fact-checked list fact is that I heard it was $15,000. What do you think about her dress? Donated, first of all, I don't think she paid for it. I don't think she probably got that donated. I don't know wedding dresses. Those are one of those things that they're never as little
Starting point is 00:08:20 as they look. You know what I mean? Like they're never as inexpensive as they look because it's a wedding. So they know that you're going to have to buy. They know you're planning on spending 10 grand on that stupid dress. So who knows? I was horrified when my sister got married and I went dress shopping with her to see how much this shit costs. Like even if you go to that like wedding dress, bridal outlet or whatever that that story is called. There's still five grand, these dresses, and they are made out of what they use to ship things with in UPS, you know? Yeah, it is actually shocking how much those things cost. Wait, oh wait.
Starting point is 00:08:57 People, people.com, she got goosebumps when she tried on her $15,000 wedding dress. Okay, that's people. Okay, everyone, you hear it from people. Probably because her circulation was cut off. So I am famously not very sartorially inclined. I'm like bad with fashion. Things that I think are like,
Starting point is 00:09:17 oh, that looks pretty good. People like that is so off-trend. And things that I'm like, oh, that's nasty. People like, are you kidding me? That is the new gama shi. So that's what sartorial means. Well, sartorial means pertaining to clothes. Don't shame me. I'm not saving you. I'm saving English.
Starting point is 00:09:37 What an odd, what an odd word for that, sartorial. So the thing is this, my reaction to her dress was, it was like say, I mean, like say okay to the dress. Like fine, I don't know, it was fine, it was nice. Say mad to the dress. Say mad, it was very say mad to the dress. I thought it was pretty. I thought she,
Starting point is 00:10:02 is pretty, she looked pretty, she looked gorgeous, of course. Yeah, she looked pretty. And then at the end, when she switched into that other dress, like her party dress, you know, I thought it was so funny because it's similar. You know, it's like kind of those lace cut out things with lots of egg is dancer flesh material. I think that was made for a black woman. I'm just going to say that. Because the flesh, I think, I don't know. I think she got it discounted because it was like not made for her, you know. But anyway, the short one was similar. But in the back, the pattern, it has this big like tear drop kind of thing coming down right between her legs. I mean, it looks like either a dog with uncut balls. You know those huge dogs with
Starting point is 00:10:45 balls that just hang down really low with the dog parts. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Yeah, like a tampon or something hanging out. But whatever it was, it was embarrassing and hilarious. And I loved that she put that on not even realizing that she had like a big tear drop hanging down from her but hole. Yeah, I don't know. I thought it was sort of, I was a little matronly. And it actually reminded me of this glass set that my grandma used to have. She used to have these glasses, like highball glasses that had gold sort of like overlays on them, but like a little peep holes that you can see into the glass. That's what it reminded me of. So they, you're saying peep holes. I just watched Bates Mot some hotels and now I'm thinking
Starting point is 00:11:26 I'm murder. I'm like don't get killed, Rihanna, run girl. So we start with their vows which you know neither one of them took any time to write. Yeah. Neither one of them had written their vows and Tom Schwartz posted on her Instagram which was posted on our Facebook page his first draft. Do you want me to read it to you? Sure. Okay. Before this wedding started, Kilmer said,
Starting point is 00:11:52 48 minutes for the next 48 years of your life. I say, fuck that, alright? Fuck that. Let's go out there and we'll romance the next 48 minutes, and then we'll leave it all out on the dance floor. We have the rest of our lives to be mediocre, but we have the opportunity to dance like gods for the next half hour of this wedding. We can't be afraid to lose.
Starting point is 00:12:15 There's no room for, I don't know, at the wedding. If we got out there and didn't romance the shit out of each other, because we are scared, then all we're left with is an excuse and then in parentheses dramatic look to Lisa we're always gonna wonder but if we go out there and give it absolutely everything that's heroic let's be heroes makes no sense. I'm glad he scrapped that. Um, I liked how before the, the vows, Lisa Vanderbump is giving her little speech and she's like, she's like, you know, just remember that every day you have to say, I love you once a day. Never go to see Bangry and never text with Tequila. And everyone's like, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha this. These are the most depressing vows I've ever heard in my life. I know. And then Lisa goes, just remember, you must support each other. When difficult decisions must be made. And the editors literally cut to
Starting point is 00:13:32 Shay. I was like, there's a reason why you can't say shady without Shay. Oh, Shay, it's like, this is like the most beautiful wedding I've ever been to ever. Like, who does that? the most beautiful wedding I've ever been to ever like who does that? I'm beautiful wedding in the woods. This is wedding is this is wedding AF Vows AF those vows are AF so Tom Tom's vows. He's like yeah Well moved west to achieve my dreams and that was the best day of my life. And I had a leaky mattress. And I was LA's least eligible bachelor.
Starting point is 00:14:12 But when Dodie brought Katie into my room drunk and make it and plopped her into my bed and said, here, keep her. I did. Because she had a job. And she's been paying my rent ever since. So I do. And when you did mention DoD, they cut to her and she's like, like doing a weird cry.
Starting point is 00:14:35 Her weird Botox cry, which no one who's like 40 should have to do yet, you know. Yeah. So Tom wraps up by saying, six years later, I honestly can't imagine not waking up to you every morning. And everyone's crying. And I sort of was expecting to say, also, you're such a fucking bitch. God.
Starting point is 00:14:57 Didn't he say something in his vows about Jack's fucking her for one night? He said something that was kind of quiet, but he's like, she was mine ever since. Well, except for Jack's for one night. I was like awkward. I somehow missed that, but that is a little awkward. Somebody fact check because I was like,
Starting point is 00:15:18 but I was watching life so I couldn't rewind. Well, Tom did say, I'm sorry, he actually did not end on that sentiment. He started saying Like I feel like we had to tear down our relationship Baba in order to rebuild I'm like this is first of all Downer second of all you only tore down a week ago We've been dry yet We just barely got all the debris into the dumpster
Starting point is 00:15:44 Yeah, you guys are basically like a t- set that's broken and then re glued together. And it's just never the same. And you're like, you have a problem with that. Yeah. Yeah. You haven't actually tested it, but once the T goes in, everything's going to shout over again. Yay. Well, hey, it's not like the series finale. And then Schwartz eventually just starts doing this nervous laugh cry.
Starting point is 00:16:04 He's like, hello, I was like, sand of all is like wiping his tears on the dog. I feel like that dog has had worse wiped on it. Or managing. It's like the closest thing to a bath that dog has had. And then Tom Sand of all, of course, it's like the woman at the wedding. He's like, Oh, this is beautiful. Brown. I like to think of this. How much I love love, bro. I love shorts. I love Katie. I love love. So now Katie's vows. She's like, I knew the minute that you were put that I saw you that you were put on this planet for me.
Starting point is 00:16:47 I had to marry you, ultimate them or no ultimate them. There's been lots of laughter and tons of tears and gallons of ranch, but we did persevere. We persevere. And I know that was just a mistake, a misspoke and moment persevered, but it does kind of make sense, you know, it's like we persevered with great fear. Well, you know that there was probably an adendum to this
Starting point is 00:17:19 entire valve that was texted later on that night, drunkenly, like, how come that when I said I do and you said I do, you like took like a beat. Like I need to be on the same side as you, Bubba. I just want to be on the same team, Bubba. So guess what? They get married and then that's when Katie's like, a Tom and I are married as fuck.
Starting point is 00:17:45 So, you know, and it's like first, there's like montage, photos, cocktail hour, first dance hugs, kisses, happiness. Lisa doing her best to not take credit for the entire thing. Every time they said this almost broke down, she was looking like, and then the Savannah pop, see, star, link. All all right forgot that one all right coming
Starting point is 00:18:07 day it's coming up it's coming up and then just stasi oddly enough she's like I always thought that like me and jack for the glue that kept this group together but no it's Katie and Schwartz that keep the group together I'm like if they're the glue they are that like shikie shitty stick glue that you know you have to like you you put on behind a picture when you put into a photo album and then two years later open up your photo album and all your photos fall out. Yeah, they're like glitter glue. It doesn't fix anything. It just gets everywhere and really serves no purpose. They're like but glue, you know, stuff you put on to look pretty for one night at a pageant and then it just dissolves into nothing. They're the butt pace that holds this group together. She's like, Jack's and I were just the glue they sniffed. It's kind of funny actually.
Starting point is 00:18:54 Yeah. So Kristen and Carter, Kristen's wasted already. And so Carter, she's making out with Carter by like, licking his chin. It was really awkward. And she's like, I love when you're like drunk and have wedding fever Who doesn't think about getting married to someone else's wedding like seriously? Who doesn't do that? Seriously, seriously, always the bridesmaid never the bride. I don't know how to write, Proto. Errgh!
Starting point is 00:19:31 I was getting more emotional when she's drunk at a wedding. Seriously, I do. I hope we get to see Kristen get married one day. Do you take this woman to be your wife? Seriously. And do you, Carter? Take. Seriously. Then the bride and groom may say seriously to each other.
Starting point is 00:19:51 Seriously, seriously. Seriously, I have. Seriously. You may now put the ring on her swiveling shoulder. Seriously? Does the bride vow to stop hitting herself in the head with her errand shoulder? Seriously? How? Does anyone have any objections to the bride still referring to herself as a
Starting point is 00:20:16 catch? And a great girlfriend, seriously? The minute I met you, you were wearing a fisherman's hat and I'm a catch and it was meant to be. Now, got me seriously turtle racing afterwards. So, so yeah, so we were seeing all these different shots from around the wedding. It's a lot of stuff happening. And this was actually sad. This is when to me, the Sheena stuff started going from, oh, hilarious foreshadowing to you now, just sad. She was sitting at a table eating alone and Shay was sitting somewhere else, just doing something. And I was like, oh, this is actually, this is just making me feel bad now. Yeah, this whole episode was basically, they could just kept cutting the Sheena going like,
Starting point is 00:21:04 Yeah, this whole episode was basically they could just kept cutting the sheen at going like There's my house brun Sorry, sorry The buffet starts and Lisa's like the plenty of waitresses around here. I would not stand in a buffet So Peter's like hey, Stasi Lisa wants you to make her a dinner plate. And Stasi had that moment, you know, where she stood there like, seriously. And then she was like, you know what, I'm back on TV. Worth it. I'll get the bitch some salmon. Yeah. Fine. Exactly. And she did. And it totally worked because by by the end they were like butt dancing together. And Stoss is like seriously, are you like the skinniest AF person here AF? Like seriously? Oh my god.
Starting point is 00:21:52 And I'm Vanderbump's like redemption. I have. If only Lisa Rina knew that all she had to do was make a plate of food for Lisa Vanderbump to get back on her good graces. So much would be solved. So we get little snippets of the the wedding. Um, Jack's is like, these pants are tight, like an even more dickroom. Yeah, he actually tore his pants, I believe. Yeah. The season opens and ends with Jack's dick. Yeah. Um, Sandevol goes up to Lisa Vanderbomb goes Lisa You did so well you want to like so good with your vows, bro Where's your dog I need to wipe my eyes again
Starting point is 00:22:37 She's like I do them both and I hope they have the strength it takes to fight through the awful jungle that their marriage will be Way to keep it positive It's all anybody talks about they're like god. This is gonna be hard Good luck guys pretty much So she's telling him you want to marry Ariana down to you and he's like oh Yeah, but like I'm never a house to Like she said no like 20 times before you've asked her, bro And Lisa says I was like her. I didn't want to get married to have children
Starting point is 00:23:19 But then I got knocked up in the bathroom with a gay bar and found out the man was rich and my life has changed forever Tom Tom. Speaking of which do you want to run a restaurant? Well, that's a big no. She said you're the best bartender we've ever had you know, which is I mean, that's huge. It's also a low bar, no pun intended. Yeah. It's huge. It's not huge enough to start stopping over. The best bartenders ever had. It's like, this was bigger for Tom than anybody else. It really was. Um, it's kind of funny because, uh, you know, Ariana's all up with her bartending book and here he is getting a bar.
Starting point is 00:24:03 I'm sure they'll cost them low level producer-driven drama for next season. And she's like, uh, so she offers basically a partnership. Yeah. She says I want to partner with you, um, and, and run this bar with you. And I was thinking about pulling in Tom Schwartz too, which to me is like, mmm, but she's like, well, it can be the public face of it. Which I also thought for Tom's hand involved was probably like a, um, especially after I've been shaving my face since I was nine years old. And now it's him.
Starting point is 00:24:34 His face wins. Is it because I've got butter on my face, like literally some of butter's hair. He literally smells like a lake, bro. It is a wedding. But every time Tom and Tom have gone into business, Tom Schwartz has been a total disaster. So I kind of feel like this is not a great idea, but it's also a great storyline for next season.
Starting point is 00:24:54 Yeah, it would be a fun spin-off. Yeah, so then we find out, I guess what, it's time for this random, Danish tradition where everyone goes up and kisses the bride. So everyone, like, Jack's is just racing to kiss Katie, you know, just to get his lips on any other woman at this point. Just not, nothing against Brittany is just that he hasn't cheated in a long time. That we know of.
Starting point is 00:25:13 Yeah. Give it a season. And she is again, she is like, where's she? She. She. She. This is like kissing she, but not at all. I'm doing it again. Those are like kissing shade, but not at all.
Starting point is 00:25:26 I might do it again. So, um, so after this Danish tradition, which by the way, congratulations, Bravo for really, you know, introducing us to a lot of Danish things, you know, between this and Caroline Fleming, we are really learning so much about Denmark. Um, so then, uh, it's time for, um, to open a Danish shop called Tom Tom Tom you'll set Abbas give us but we'll call them Tom Tom's So now it's time for Tom Schwartz's brother one of the one of the triplets one of the theaters to make a speech so theater
Starting point is 00:25:59 We'll get up there and he's like well you guys are both beautiful Congratulations, he gets up there and he's like well you guys are both beautiful. Congratulations. He gets up there. And he's like people are like why is Erica Jane here? Christmas will varicose. I am for a loop. So then theodore number two get up. I'm for a loop. So then theodore number two gets up. I'll go fuck. Which is by the way, have most of these speeches sounded after while because at a certain point they just were dropping at
Starting point is 00:26:33 bombs then because theodore two gets up there and he's like, I'm blessed God, blessed Katie and Tommy and everyone's blessed everyone and then theodore number one gets back up there and he's like, you're a cool ass motherfucker and everyone's blessed everyone and then fjud and then theater number one gets back up there and he's like you're a cool ass motherfucker and everyone's like yeah fuck that and stand up all gets up there and he's like wow everyone just fucking loves you man and then Stasi gets up there and's like fuck yeah toast is fuck toast a f
Starting point is 00:27:02 Tost a f. You're the most general couple like you've taken care of me a million times and then they have a montage of Stasi crying and everybody going you're a bitch That was I wish they used that bitch montage again. That was so funny last week Stasi's saying something completely normal and nice they cut everybody everybody like you're a bitch. Get out of my life Yeah, that was that was an amazing moment. Katie says If you told me like two years ago that like Stasi Schroeder is like at our wedding giving us to giving us a toast I would have said like where's the toast and why didn't she give me any toast? I love toast. Where's my toast? What is this wedding you're speaking of? So then we get a classic scene a moment where everyone's dancing and having shots in the band comes on and they're called Harbor Party and she's like,
Starting point is 00:27:58 they call themselves a yacht rock party. I don't know what this is the kind of music they play on the yacht or the heavy Yaw or if it's like you see But like I don't eat things will cause so I'm not gonna dance Like where's Laila if it's a yacht rock. I don't like boats. So I Don't like boats and I don't like geology so I don't like boats. So I don't like boats and I don't like geology so I don't like yacht rocks. The scariest thing on TV was Gilligan's Island. It's like that pretty girl stuck with all those nerds.
Starting point is 00:28:35 Like they were going on a three hour tour. That's like a lot of tours. That's why quit singing. I don't like the tour. You know, school is not for me so I just don't want to be on an island of the professor. I don't eat ginger snaps. So Brittany and Jacks go off and have their romantic moment.
Starting point is 00:28:59 And yeah, I'm having fun. And another day and another dollar. I'm having fun. Another day and another dollar. Jackson's like, uh, listen, I don't think things are going well for us anymore. I'm just gonna say it.
Starting point is 00:29:12 She's like, huh? Commercial. He's like just kidding. Yeah, it was basically nothing. He's like before, like a couple of years ago, I would have been fucking 30 other people. But we're at the point now where I'm drawing my eyebrows on. I'm keeping you. It's not quite as easy as it used to be.
Starting point is 00:29:33 I have drawn my eyebrows on. What? Who does that? A Britney's best, like, Jay, X. Jay, yeah, this post again, his dick cut off and fade is a chicken. I think now would be a really good time to mention something that we we mentioned last week, but I I feel like people didn't hear it. So I'm just going to reiterate it. Ronnie is from Texas. I'm from New York. We live in Los Angeles and we really had no way of knowing that Versailles Kentucky is
Starting point is 00:30:04 pronounced Versailles, not Versailles, because we've gotten so many tweets and emails about it. And if we haven't responded to you, it's nothing against you. It's just that we've responded already to so many of them. So we get it. We understand. Far be it for us to ever once again refer to a city that's based off another city by the by the the original city's name. We want you to ever. Versailles. Castle and Versailles.
Starting point is 00:30:35 Um, Jackson's like, oh babe, that would never happen. Like marriage for us is gonna happen. Like when, when? I don't know. mean whatever like there's I just want you to know there's a light at the end of the tunnel she's like there's a tunnel we're in your Marriotton we have a tunnel in Kentucky it's in the town of Marcellus. Me, Marseille. No, Marcellus. He was on Big Brother. He got a lot of fans in Kentucky.
Starting point is 00:31:17 So Lisa and Katie sit down to have their romantic talk. And she's like, congratulations, making it through all the pain. What are you going to have a baby Katie? She's like, I can't be a pregnant waitress. Okay. Obviously, you've never been to my hometown. You've obviously never been to any cafes and versales. Pregnant people can hold salt and pepper trays just as easily as non-pregnant people
Starting point is 00:31:46 If anything you have a little shelf you just put one right on top Yeah, and I don't remember was this where Ariana also was talking about how she loved the wedding and she goes you should have one Yeah, and she's like Tom can wear the dress. He killed it And Ariana actually said there's a chance Ariana actually said, there's a chance. I mean, there's a chance. And then she was like, wait, I have a question. Where's my house, man?
Starting point is 00:32:12 Oh, literally. Of course she like, you know, maybe Shay is like on the toilet reading a magazine or a newspaper, which of course is so Shay, because if he had any, any wits about him, he would know he could use the texture app am I right? Oh my god texture! texture? a good friend texture that preferred reading app for Vanderbump rules that is unverified that is a claim I just made.
Starting point is 00:32:38 It's unverified unverified. Well if they're smart. If they're like obviously not. That's a big if. That's a big if. That's a big if. Listen, people. Here's a thing. We always talk about texture, but we love texture.
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Starting point is 00:34:58 Another day, another magazine. Another day, another... Another day, another issue of hello Canada. I know the day another. I know the day another issue of hello Canada. Canada as we come up in Turkey. May Earth, a steward, Wattings. I can't even butcher names as for news boys. I might say them properly more or less. So, uh, Ariana finishes talking to Sheena and then she, Tom takes her aside because, you know,
Starting point is 00:35:32 yes, every, every woman wants to get married at a wedding, you know, and Tom has a very feminine presence in life. So he's like, oh, well, we need to talk. Well, and, uh, she's like, yeah, Mosquito just need to talk. Well, and she's like, yeah, mosquito just flew up my nose. And I thought poor Sina, like that's probably how everybody feels when they're done with the scene of conversation. I can feel it's entirely wriggling up there. Good.
Starting point is 00:36:02 Dad. How are you now? So he tells her about Lisa asking you about the partnership and he starts crying and then Ariana starts crying and he's like, I've been a bartender for years, I've always wanted my own bar, bro. And she's like, wow, it's really good to see him have a future outside, sir. I was like, it's literally a block away. Yeah. Well, she's literally saying, just go a block away. She just wants him to literally step outside.
Starting point is 00:36:37 Yeah, it was in an old, old, old shop. So then they get, yeah. So then they get really romantic on these they get really romantic And he's like We think He's always each other I've never found anyone with really free producing with you All right, it's like what the fuck is happening Basically he's saying yeah, I browse like perfect What the fuck is happening? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha we were repainting a wall and you got a drip on like the car bit because I care about you that much
Starting point is 00:37:29 Till I met you kids were like so 20 years from now You put the bra in parade Bro, he says oh no way. I'm not gonna propose bro. And she's like um, yeah, I never thought you'd be that tacky to propose at, you know, that tacky to propose someone else's wedding because gross. And he's like, all right, well, but that to the side, but like to be real, would you want to get married at some point, Ralph? She's like, I don't know. So I can't see them down at a wedding. What if he starts crying? Sorry, but I keep on the floor. He's Ariana Madness.
Starting point is 00:38:10 Yeah, she was a little bit like, my boyfriend's had too much to drink. He's getting emotional. So over at the cake cutting, which is the next wedding event we go to, they almost have another fight. Because Tom Schwartz is drunk and smells like a lake, you know, because he didn't take a shower. And he's like, yeah, boobs. We're going to cut the cake.
Starting point is 00:38:33 And she's like, no, Tom, the bottom layers. And then he puts a little bit on her nose. And so she puts someone in his face, but she's kind of mad. And then we're like, look it off, man, look it off. And he's like, yeah, I'm not really a nose guy. And that's when Jackson, that's when Jackson's like, come on, man. And he's like, you know, for me, I was I was talking whole foot in it, which I was like, that's gross, but kind
Starting point is 00:38:55 of hilarious. I just wrote idiot. At this point in the season, my notes get less and less. I'm like, Jack's idiot. Hey, Jay, I got you one of them foot cakes. I can stick my foot right in it. So Tom, Tom, Tom, uh, crazy robot dancing, Jackson motorboats, Britt me at least in Stasi but dance. Um, everyone is, in fact, everyone's dancing with someone and then they cut to sheena,
Starting point is 00:39:22 sat like alone. And I wrote the note, I am actively feeling sad for her. Yeah, me too. I'm so dancing on my own. I think Robin and I get like, totally get along because like we totally get each other. I feel like Rob. Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened,
Starting point is 00:39:58 and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully
Starting point is 00:40:30 crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or wonder ya. Thanks for the claws. Robin and I both hate lobster and crabs. Hey, do you guys mean my new friend, Robin? Yeah. So Tom, Lisa pulls Tom over again and she goes, she goes, so did you think about what I said? I'm like Lisa, it's been 10 minutes. Oh, just don't answer now.
Starting point is 00:41:02 I'll check back in in one minute. Have you told Schwarzee we want to hire his face, darling? He has a certain show to be here. Yeah, oh, I got it wrong because this is when she announced that she wants Schwarzee to face the wedding. Apologies, everyone. Apologies. We'd call it Tom Tom. And I thought this is so perfect because they're name,
Starting point is 00:41:24 both of their names are Tom. And also she's literally giving them direction in their life Which is what a Tom Tom does yeah And I can actually imagine the Tom Tom playing boom boom boom boom Is that what they're called Tom Tom's and there's that song Tom Tom Club by the band the Tom Tom Club Make a right 20 feet The Tom Tom darling Darling
Starting point is 00:41:52 I also got excited at this point because they cut to someone at the wedding and I was like oh my god I know that person. I feel like I'm now at this wedding. I have an association with this wedding I New someone at the wedding is not crazy. I now know someone with a seat that smells kind of like horse poop. I've made it. So they don't ask her how much they're gonna be making, but you know it's $5 an hour. So Schwartz comes over and he's like, boobah, she's like
Starting point is 00:42:18 darling. And he kisses her. And he's like, Wow, it's like the first time I've ever kissed you just on one cheek. It's more Miami. I can't just think, yes, I'm trying to ignore that.
Starting point is 00:42:34 Anyway, so she's like, what'd you like to be a partner in Tom Tom? And he's like, what, Papa, no, too much. I can't. There's so much pressure on me. Like, what if it, what if it fails? That's going to be on us. I was like, you just married Katie.
Starting point is 00:42:50 Yeah. You can do this. You already have embraced failure. It's, it hint, it's wearing a $15,000 dress over there. Yeah. All you do is just stand there and go from table to table and make sure everyone's doing okay. But I'll have to iron. I don't have to iron, right?
Starting point is 00:43:11 He's a reject to commitment and he's already married Katie. I don't want to push it. So Tom's getting mad. He's like, bro, are you busy in three months? Because if not, maybe you want to open up a bar called Tom Tom, bro. He's like, Lisa Vanderbub. Sometimes, times like, oh, Papa, I don't know. Maybe I should do it, Papa. What do you think? Oh, yeah. Yeah, about. So now, Stasi and Ariana, this is season finale and you know it's where everybody airs their grievances Before the month long reunion party Yeah, so Stasi just goes right up to Ariana He's very on his tail
Starting point is 00:43:57 Oh, we got a little robot noise there. Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, no, you're back again. You're back. I'm back I was you know this Somehow there must have been a just to open some the force, but Yeah, Ariana is taking a selfie she's doing this big souping selfie. That's when Stasi comes up behind her is like, why don't you ever put me in your snapchats and everyone goes, I don't know my phone died And Stasi says do you still think I'm annoying? I mean, it just hurts my feelings when you're like, so mean to me. And Ariana goes, well, if you suggest that my phone died because I don't wanna put you in my snapchat,
Starting point is 00:44:33 that would make you pretty annoying. So I hope you're not about to say that. Oh. Stasi's like, God, she's so good. She's psychic. So St Stasi keeps her heart. Psychic AF. She's like, it hurts my feelings when you're mean. So, just like me.
Starting point is 00:44:51 Just like, just be nice to me. How about that? And she says, you know, my time is like, it's spent working and, you know, trying to develop new friendships. She goes, uh, what's your point? She goes, I'm really doing the best I can't stess it. I mean trying to fit everything in. There's like Tom like we have to schedule his braid person to come over. Like we're in whether that window unit air conditioning unit is gonna fall on our head like how can
Starting point is 00:45:18 I have a kid like bartending putting together cocktail work, like trying to develop me with it, just, it's like, whoa. Stop even saucy was like, yeah, it's like, whoa, but then it's like, I'm finally broke this bitch. Finally took me five seasons. However long it is. The whole whisperer. But they, but they finally like reached this nice,
Starting point is 00:45:43 little understanding of each other where Ariana's like, But they finally like reached this nice little Understanding of each other where Ariana's like yeah, I think stossie's actually Okay She's like she's not as bad as I thought I mean she's not a total monster And she so her way of making it she's like We're in a friendly place and I we both love the same people so you know just don't say I mean and don't say I mean again or I'll kill you and Stasiq is you would how she says it would be slow and it would hurt really bad Stasiq is well maybe we have more in common than we think because I love murder too whatever it takes whatever it takes whatever it. Whatever it takes.
Starting point is 00:46:25 That's like the most realistic beginning to a friendship we've seen. Now of course we know this is already over because there was a Twitter war last week about something's stassy set on our podcast and area and it's like ignorant. And then they got in a big huge Twitter fight. So I guess that's already over.
Starting point is 00:46:42 But you know, I love the temporary piece wedding spring. Yeah, that's nice. It's a nice feeling. People feel a lot of emotions at weddings. That's why you always become Facebook friends with all these people and they never talk to them ever again. Yeah. And then they show scene on like,
Starting point is 00:46:55 Shay, Shay. She literally is Marsha Gaye Harden and Mystic River, walking around that parade at the end, looking for Tim Robbins. Scotty? Scotty? Whatever his name is. As Laura Linney watches coldly from the window. So Kristen and Tom, well Tom, I'm surprised. I brought my trumpet. Now I left because my uncle Michael always brings a little toy trumpet to weddings and does the exact same thing.
Starting point is 00:47:26 So I was like, oh, Uncle Michael. And then I loved that one, Tom. So, you know, this, whatever they're called, Harbor Party. They're playing dance all days and they're performing and then Tom gets up there with his little trumpet. And he blows some note out right in the ear of the saxophone play. And the guys like, that was like my ear Okay, that was my ear me assistance need that bra
Starting point is 00:47:50 It's okay bra really bad seriously bra So Kristen is making out with Carter's chin again That's a sound of Kristen making out with a chin. And Carter goes, yeah, tonight is the night. She's like, I'm not ovulating. I'm like, oh no. Yeah, we know that she's not ovulating because no alien has wound up on someone's face just yet.
Starting point is 00:48:24 No alien has come crashing out of someone's stomach yet. Yeah, well, no, she's ovulating when we see Carter and he's lying on his back with a blob on his face for a week. Yeah. And then their entire apartment is just full of slimy pods going like. All right so then yeah afterwards they're like hanging out like girls or some of the girls are hanging inside the house and the guys are hanging out. It's not like I just want a lot but I just want love whatever and then and then Schwartz tells Jackson town standable like he's like gosh Bubba's I really hate it when you guys were fighting and sometimes like well well Jackson fuck my girlfriend Just like what and guess three times Jackson's like wasn't three times
Starting point is 00:49:21 Glad we got that settled Glad we got that settled. Oh, but a sweet friendship. So yeah, then it switches back and forth between the girls. Remember when we were like, petrusting weddings, and then Tom would come home, and then he'd be like, what are you doing? They would be like, petrusting weddings. And then, yeah, just cut back and forth. It was actually really sweet.
Starting point is 00:49:41 And then Katie, Tom, Lisa, Canada, dogs, I'll sit together. This is where I noticed the big tear drop coming out of the butt dress. And she signs the wedding certificate and Tom Schwartz. It's really, really official. And then let's see. Katie tells us she's like, you know, like, I really want people to look at Tom and I is like the couple that's perfect together And I really hope that they look at us like the couple that can fight for it And I really hope people can see that we're like a couple that's like married now And I hope people can see why is everything about like every dream you have is How other people feel about you. That's so sad, Katie.
Starting point is 00:50:25 Oh my god. Oh, you know what I put? That's really sad. I want to hug Katie. She has a tampon coming out of the back of her desk. So thank you, Dress, for stopping me from feeling things. So three months later. Three months later.
Starting point is 00:50:47 That was Lisa Vanderpump doing the Wains World. Dootie Lee do darling Lionel Richie wrote that for me Lionel, you know, we both we both visionaries Lionel nine So Shina is driving to Villa Rosa. She's in a tizzy And Basically we've learned that Shay has gone missing for six days and he hasn't stayed with her for two weeks And she's also calling right outside Lisa's house. She calls her and she's like, she's saying out. I mean, Lisa, this is she and I,
Starting point is 00:51:32 and I just want to do the now. It's been a rough morning. I was like, my love's eyes were being light for you in a second. As the gate opens, like, Gina, you're here. She. So Vander Poems like, Sina, you're here. So Vanderpombs like,
Starting point is 00:51:49 do I know what this is about? She's like, there's a lot of things I've done about recent leave. She's like, I've heard rumblings darling. I have texture. I've been sitting on the pot, reading all the rumours about shea on people from texture. the pot reading all the rumors about Shay on people from texture. I've been reading about your relationship and cat fancy. I've been reading about you and Shay in men's not fitness. So Cena's like, oh, I've been acting like it's PG game. But I've been lying to my friends myself.
Starting point is 00:52:31 Today there is someone sent Sina a tweet that was like, oh Sina, you're such a faker, you lied all season shut up. And she goes, I did not lie. Like I seriously thought we were in a good place. So draw somewhere else. Just like every time I told people that we're in a good place. So draw somewhere else.
Starting point is 00:52:50 Um, just like every time I told people that we're in a good place, I only met like I really liked our apartment. It was like a good place. It was the only place that could fit all of my printed campuses from every angle. I like that Lisa just cut to the core. It was like, since you've been mad, it's been bullshit. Isn't it? She's like, yeah. So basically, Shay, yeah, has been out of there. And Vanderpump's like, dumb him, that's it, darling. So she says that she knows that he's doing Adderall, like she knows he's back on drugs. And he's been doing Adderall staying with his band. And she's like, I want him to look
Starting point is 00:53:23 me in the eye and tell me you're not looking for anything. I dare him! So cut to, you know. And by the way, I just want to say that by the way, um, remember how Shay was having that extreme sun sensitivity in New Orleans and at the wedding and everything? That's a total side effect of Adderall. Oh, it is.
Starting point is 00:53:40 I looked it up. I was like, I wonder that sun sensitivity and I looked it up. It's like, people who use Adderall should make like like be like be careful about being in the sun If you look it up I googled and be a good to lake water some people have Sensitivity if they're on Adderall so Shay you're on face and skin betrayed. Yeah It betrayed you so We go over to like Tarzan or wherever the hell and Sheena's like sitting there in that big chair with the monster cut holders in between them like their Joey and Chandler
Starting point is 00:54:14 You know finally with a thousand dollars in their pocket able to buy comfortable chairs in their apartment Mm-hmm those couches are so disturbing. I know. I'm like Sheena. You should just be so happy You get to recommend those super broached couches are so disturbing to me. I know. I'm like, Sheena, you should just be so happy. You get to recommend those super broached couches. Yeah. So she returns. And Sheena's on her phone texting, of course. And he sits down on the other side of the, you know, extra large big, gold, sweet tea or whatever. And she's like, oh, I didn't even hear you walk in.
Starting point is 00:54:42 Stupid. She. Did your facial airs? And he's like, yeah, it was kind of a dare, but I kept it. I just kept writing L.O.L. that couch. She just goes, coral. I was like, is this check off right here? This is like the most captivating dialogue of all time. It's all for sure. He's been inside a girl named Claire's.
Starting point is 00:55:02 I want to smile. inside a girl named Clair's. I want to smile. I've been I've been saying someone name Spencer's. At least mine was innocent. I mean, what's the fuck? Cuts in Shay? Sit down again, do it again. Like you put it on a soft chair. She know it doesn't work. So, um, yeah, it's like super awkward and she's like, writing, you're home home. It's like, cause I needed to figure things out with it, out involvement from everybody else, but like, I miss you the whole time and I realize, I can't be without you.
Starting point is 00:55:37 And he starts crying and she's like, yeah, uh, Shay, you're never less than me. Cause yeah, but I got your attention right. And I've been trying for so long and I can't be happy without you. I'm like, shut the fuck up, Shay. Honestly, shut the fuck up. You know, the first time when you disappear or went away or whatever, that's one thing. But, you know, you can't build a marriage off of, you know, disappearing for six days and not seeing anything.
Starting point is 00:56:00 That's bullshit. Sheena does not deserve that. If you have issues, you got to shut that you need to sort out. You got to loop her in, but if you disappear like one time, deserve that. If you have issues, you got shit that you need to sort out. You got to loop her in, but if you disappear, like one time, you get, you're, you're allowed to do that one time when you were high on drugs. Okay. And now, well, you're high on drugs again, but you don't get to do it a second time and then actually, you got to figure stuff out.
Starting point is 00:56:18 And then you put the blame on Sheena saying, oh, well, got your attention. I mean, admittedly, Sheena probably does talk over you and does not listen to you at all, but that's on you. And you knew that when you married her. Yeah. And also beyond leaving for six days, he cleared the account. Yeah. How about that?
Starting point is 00:56:33 She took $7,000. And she's like, that was for a equipment you promised. I'm like, Adderall does not cost $7,000. I mean, that's a lot of damn Adderall. If you didn't know doing that. Exactly. And he's sitting there crying saying, you know, like, but no, I love you. Like, I really, I love you.
Starting point is 00:56:50 Like, no, that's bullshit. You realize how much you loved her money. And on top of that, you realize that you're wrong now. I mean, this is definition of crocodile. Yeah. He knows he's really in trouble. I mean, when they're shooting three months later to get something to put in the show, he knows he's fucked when he has to show up at home, you know? Yes. And so of course he's crying because he's like, where am I going to live? So he says he tries
Starting point is 00:57:13 the whole guilt thing, which you know, we hear every time there's someone still using hate to say it. But it's true. It's an easy, you know, I've always been an easy scapego because Everybody's labeled means a drugie like I've been labeled as a drugie. I'm like that's like a milk getting mad that it It's in a carton that says milk. Yeah, I mean You're a drugie. It's not like people made you a drugie and then labeled you you came that way and they labeled you You know why you're an easy scapego because you went away for six days and cleared out her bank account and didn't tell her where you were. That's what makes you an easy scapegoat.
Starting point is 00:57:48 Share. Yes. Stupid. And she's like, you're not on drugs. And he goes, no, and don't disrespect me. You know, he's like, yeah, see, no one talks me to the respect as this skin is little burning off from a roll sun exposure. And it's like none of your friends have ever respected me. I'm like, they tried to help you climb that rope that time.
Starting point is 00:58:05 Yeah. Okay. Okay. You're right. But then he's like, but she's like, well, I don't, she's like, I don't support you. And he goes, not beyond financially. I'm like, oh, oh, just that, just that that she supports you financially. Is that supposed to be like just some afterthought?
Starting point is 00:58:23 Like she got you a bagel one day. If she's supporting financially, that means she's paying rent, she's paying for everything. And that's a lot of a burden to put on a waitress. I'm sorry. Yeah. And always has been and you've never ever had a fucking job. You whiny piece of shit. Yeah. Where? What is your job, Shay? He's selling out of all. He does not have one. He's never had one. It's making music, bro. So she goes, I talked to Lisa. He's like, I don't give a shit about her. I was like, oh, girl, you are really.
Starting point is 00:58:54 You are just begging. I could have picked off this show forever. Yeah. So he says that he's been spending all this time at the studio because it's his passion. He's been staying up late at night. It's my passion. And he's like, I hope you can find passion one day for anything like I have for that. I really hope that for you. Have you not seen her eyelashes? She has passion.
Starting point is 00:59:13 Those things came easy. That was a lot of work, sir. Excuse me, sir. Maybe you should be a customer at, sir. And you would see the passion she now has for good service. Yeah. She is still trying to sell to Lane see bass all these years later. Even though it's really called to a fish. But you guys like a Chilean fish without claws? But yeah, so he says this, he's being all of a sudden very condescending about his passion. And yet by the way, he has nothing to show for his passion. And so then I love that she has response. It's both like condescending, naive, and also
Starting point is 00:59:50 cussed the core of everything and she goes, I just don't know how you guys stand up all night and not doing drugs. And then he just kind of looks around the room. Like he looks at himself facing away from himself in the printing. She I mean, she's kind of got him. Yep. And she's like, this is not the man I'm married. I mean, kind of, except that one had bus facial hair and a lot more fat. But that's. And she says this has been tainted from day one.
Starting point is 01:00:17 And we're done on paper legally, financially, carefully printed canvasfully. I'm meeting a lawyer and Mark Andrely. Yeah, then she starts sobbing and I feel nothing. You mother fuck out. I was so proud of her because he was giving her like, you know, it's crying, he's being vulnerable. He was doing all the stuff that we've seen so many girls on these shows fall
Starting point is 01:00:40 for time and time again. And I was we've seen her fall for that so many times with them, especially since she is the one who wants that fairy tale marriage and family and happily ever after and she's the queen of brushing things on the rug. You know, you know, this it seemed like if anyone was going to fall for it with Benschina and so I was so proud of her. I'm really proud of you Sheena that you were basically like, no, fuck it because even if you are telling the truth, I can't trust you anymore. And this marriage is fucking out. And like good for her for not dragging out into like endless scenes of counseling for next
Starting point is 01:01:13 season. Like she just was like, fuck it. Ending this, gonna go get bone by a hot guy now. Well, not only that, but she's dating his friend. I mean, she was dating like I have a foreshade that his friends with she and then started dating she and is now back to the other guy Oh, you know good for her and then I like then she's she basis like you can pack up your stuff And she goes oh and by the way, she your room is a fucking disaster perguge Why does he have his own room that's this whole marriage is so weird? She's like you need a pack
Starting point is 01:01:43 There's circuses. Well, maybe it was like a classic. Take the metallic giraffe. And that's how this season ended. I'm actually a super depressing, but empowering note. Pretty much the best was that it ended with him crying, rolling a bright purple shiny suit case out. And I thought how awkward there's like a cameraman just sitting there in this room while he's packing up his clothes to leave. You even have to use Cena to get your sit out of her apartment. You fucking loser. It reminded me of season one of Vanderpump rules when Stasi. I believe moved out of Jackson's apartment and was like this is supposed to be the best summer ever
Starting point is 01:02:31 There was you know, she does have something to show for his passion actually. There's a sound a sound I was because it's on sound cloud. It made a sound effect. There's a sound There's a song that he has out on SoundCloud that someone posted a couple weeks ago, and I listened to it, and it made me even more angry in this scene because he's like, fuck your friends, fuck Lisa. But of course, the song, who's it about
Starting point is 01:02:55 everybody on Vanderpump rules, you know? Like he mentions like Balden, like Jacks. And it's just sad. Yeah. That's really sad. Well, you know what? He will probably bottom out again. I don't want to back in the shoes and, you know, yeah, well, forwards to renting a car from him from roots hurts. Everyone was saying, I went on Twitter just to see what people were saying about that scene. Like to see who's side they
Starting point is 01:03:20 were on. And of course, there's a lot of people who are like, yeah, good for you getting away from Sheena. She's so awful. Um, and that really annoyed me. And then there were a couple that said, what a horrible way to end the season. That was so depressing. I think that's the most liberating, beautiful way to end the season. Getting a user piece of shit, you know, I was really proud of Sheena. I thought I thought, you know, for all the, for all the jokes we've been making and like, oh poor diluted Sheena for her to sort of take back control of the situation and be like, fuck you, get off my show. And it's almost paying karma in a way because Sheena came into the picture because she dated Eddie Cibrion and was kind of a user and a hangar on and then she ended up trying
Starting point is 01:04:02 to clean up by marrying a user in a hangar on. So I feel like your karma is now about even China. So good luck. Good luck to you, darling. Good luck, darling. Good luck. Unfortunately, I can't open a restaurant called C.J. Well, actually, it would have been C.J. Because she was she She's a she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and she and We'll be back next week to talk some reunion of Marcos with Waifinos. And then tomorrow, guess what we're talking about. Real House was a bit of a heals. Yeah, it's the real A.S.W.A.W. So we will see you tomorrow.
Starting point is 01:04:56 Bye everyone. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. And Wondry Plus in Apple Podcast. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.

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