Watch What Crappens - #425 RHOP: Challenged Slime Buckets

Episode Date: April 4, 2017

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Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crapens add free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. To talk to other crapman's listeners about the shows as they air, come over to facebook.com-watch what crap ends that's so much that happens. Watch what crap ends would like to thank its sponsors, Christy Doherty, and Mia Hansen-Loha,

and our very special super-subscranis sponsor, Miss Madonna Hines, Mads with a 6-City! We love you girls. Hey everybody, Ronnie here. We did an extra episode this week to welcome back to Real Housewives of Potomac. So I'll skip all of our usual opening, bloody, bloody, blah.

To bring you the show. Enjoy your absolute favorite. Yes, my favorite is back, but I'm not going to concentrate on how much I hate it because that's not what we do here. We're going to concentrate on the things I love about it. You can concentrate about some of your hate. It's okay because you know, I grew to hate Marant medicine. So and I expressed that quite a quite a few times. So this is like the And so, and I expressed that quite a, quite a few times. So, this is like the, this is now the turnabout is fair play moment. Okay, well, my basic, I'll just say my basic Kate. My basic Kate is that the reason I like these shows is because I find them to be very

fun. And this show, they're just mean. They're just awful people. Karen, awful fucking human being, horrible human being. I hate this kind of woman. I know this kind of woman from waiting tables my whole life. The woman who's never done shit or accomplished anything on her own

that treats everybody around her like they're pieced as a shit because her husband has some money. I hate that. And then you've got Juselle who has nothing going on, no love, nothing in her own life And so she's just gonna go ruin other people's life for fun. It's disgusting to me. It's gross and it's sad There and Tim got it me I Actually really enjoy Potomac because I think it's funny as hell. I really crack up. I think they are so shady

That I don't care if they're being me and because they make me laugh a lot. So it's weird, right? It's weird that I'm like, so I'm fine. I think though that Giselle is going to be the villain this year. Last year, she was sort of like the lead. She was sort of villain, but sort of the hero. It couldn't really tell. I think they're setting her up to be

the villain and I will point out as we go through the things that happen that leading me to to believe that. It's not for the fact that she says some really, really shady stuff. I mean, Jacelle's even her opening line. She's like, bird open, word on the street is that I'm still the word on the street. Like you couldn't even come up with a new line for your opening. I mean, this show,

like how much does this show cost to make? Is this a two dollar budget? You guys could ask your friends to write some lines to choose from. I thought the same thing too. I was like, wow, these producers were just, they really did not put any effort to like, mm, let's just add an adverb.

We'll add still in there. I'm still word on the street. Great, that's pretty much the new word, new thing. Cause she made up word on the street. I mean, it's fun. Yeah, word on the street is, I'm the word on the street. I, I really always really liked that one. And Karen was like, Potomac put me out of pedestal

and the view is spectacular. My God, you're gonna, what exactly are you looking at? Walmart. One thing I'd really do love because that's what I'm focusing on now is that Karen got some facial surgery and she still hasn't learned to that. When you go to your old school face surgery, face lift doctor and they keep pulling back that forehead, you don't pull the hairline forward. You know what I mean? Like her hairline is just in the back of her head now.

I mean, get some bangs at least. I know. I was going to post something on our Instagram. That was going to make fun of that. But I actually was like, I actually had a moment of feeling bad because it's so bad that I'm like, you know, I feel bad for this woman at this point. I think I'm not gonna put this photo. I don't. It's not like she can grow more hair. So I get that it's like making fun of someone

in a really mean way, but just bangs. I mean girl, you spent so much money on your face and your clothes and everything else. Bangs, they're cheap. Bangs, well we'll see. We'll see how I feel about her. It may be over the course of season, if I feel like she's being just a huge asshole, like more than the amount of asshole that I enjoy from her, then maybe I'll unleash the

photo. That mocks her. But, you know, the thing is, I know you hate Karen Huber. I think Karen Huber is hilarious in her, in the way that she is an asshole, because she is such an entitled asshole for no good reason. But I mean, she cracks me up even last season when she had a hissy fit because she couldn't sit in the middle of the table at her birthday. She is so ridiculous, but I think she's very funny to watch for the most part. So this opening and how about Sharice? We didn't get any scary scary or scared dough, which was every scene, every B roll last year is like a deer terrified. Yeah, we didn't see our little deer friend

to see this episode. This time there were like horses, butterflies, just a new house beef with bees in the ground. Yeah, that's called karma ground bees. See, see, Ronnie, it works out for you. The bees are coming out of the ground just in here. Yeah. So then we've got Ashley at her restaurant Oz, which is serving kangaroo and emu. I mean, I don't know who thought that was going to be a good idea. But it's, I mean, I'm sorry, go ahead. I would try it. I don't know who thought that was going to be a good idea. But it's like, oh, I'm sorry, go ahead. That was exactly how I would try it. But I don't know if I would try it from Michael's restaurant or Ashley's. Yeah. I think the Potomac probably doesn't have room for kangaroo and emu restaurants.

Yeah, that's just a burger bar. Yeah, I mean, I know that there is Australian cuisine, but it's not a particularly well-known world cuisine. So the idea of like, yeah, we're gonna have a restaurant that's gonna be all Australian cuisine and it's gonna be really interesting and cool. I'm like, I just don't really see the mass appeal of that, aside from the novelty of Triangaroo. For us like this has never been done before.

It's called the Outback Steakhouse, okay. They make regular steakhouse food, but they call their onion rings and all some blossom or no is that is that Apple? Yeah. Well, that's the Bloomin onion. Oh, yeah. The Bloomin onion. Apple bees has those weird onion peels. They're like the little petals of onion that have been deep fried. Yeah, that's delicious. All delicious. Awesome. Awesome. Yeah, so as she's at her restaurant, that's not doing well. Cherese is running around with her kids because why I spilled over,

why I cried over spilled milk when you can laugh over champagne. Mm-hmm. Okay. Well, how about just get a job so you can afford both. Cherese. The nearest river at the famous Korken fork.

Ah! This may be laugh. She's like, I will be buying classy things And then near and over at the famous Corken fork Maybe last she's like I will be buying classy things from places that rhyme Money is no object for me. Yeah, please the lady told her what's your budget? Huh, she's like, oh, I don't have one Don't need the facts machine has not been working and I'm supposed to get a new report in. Dr. Bill Gates is going to fax me our budget, and then I'll let you know. But for right now, there is no budget. And then we go over to Robin,

who's not even pretending to have any pride. She's like, hi, this is Robin, and I've accepted the Slime Bucket Challenge for action action for kids and then her kids slime her on camera You know, I feel like she probably gets slimed a lot in life Because what is this slime bucket challenge is that a thing? One and I had to downsize so we can't really do though the ice bucket challenge anymore, so we just have to do slime. I don't know how to pronounce the disease that's of water bucket challenges, so slime bucket, frinkings.

It's for Al, you know, Al. Just slime bucket for Al. I don't know where it's you know with this line. I mean, we have a weird relationship like slimes on my head and everything, but I'm not about to get back together with this line. You know, it's the real, large disease that the, is this for Al Roker? You know, it's like when you lose weight, but then you have a lollipop head. We're doing this line book of challenge just for the press LR. It's the way I can get myself a digital camera. Hmm.

One. I'm doing the new AQ bed challenge. So, Jacelle drives up in her white range rover. She just wants to be a real housewives of Atlanta so bad. And she's meeting her gay cow who you guys might remember from last season was part of the the big crab boy controversy. Steregate, he went upstairs while Sherice was getting her hair done or something. Oh, it's a man walking out. Uh, Jacelle has no friends because she's an awful human being. So she goes to her pay for gay, Cal, to get her hair done. And she's very additutie about everything, you know.

She's like, well before my new wig, you need to wash me, then, you know, throw that off because I could wash first. Like, okay, way to make a stand, Jizelle. Yeah. She was like, so how was Sweden? And he's like, who's good. She's like, I hear the boys are nice and sweet. And she's like, yeah, they're tall and he's just like, yes. Anyway, so I'm going how it's Sweden, he's like, who's good? She's like, I hear the boys are nice and sweet. She's like, yeah, they're tall. And she's just like, yes, anyway,

so I'm going to be dating someone now. I'm like, okay, well enough about Cal. You see how this relationship is? A few token questions. And now we're going to talk about your dating interest, Kevin. Yeah, sure. The gaze we, you know, we're bitchy and all that stuff. But if we're getting paid, we will do our damn job. Yeah, that's a little. Absolutely. Stupid ass. We'll do it. So she's start, this is when she starts telling us, uh, we're,

we're cutting between her and Cherisse. Now, oh, Cherisse is also, by the way, now, now, Cherisse is the one I don't, I really don't like. Sasha. Cherisse is hilarious because she's decided to come back to this season. As like crazy fun. She me come back to the season. It's like crazy fun, Sheree. Hey, Sheree. So she's got this new character for herself named Shasha.

Yeah, who was a call back to when she did her hip hop moment at her birthday party last year, her 40s, last season. Yeah, my name is Sheree, but I'm also a Sheree, and I'm rapping when I'm rapping,, my name is Sherees, but I'm also a Sherees and I'm rapping when I'm rapping because my name is Sherees. It's a good one Sherees. Yeah, it was like this very 1988 style rap, like pseudo-Solvenpeppa, you know, and she's got her dog name Prada.

See, that's the thing. The dog name Prada is a real, that's a barrier for me for wanting to like Shreys, a dog named Prada. And she's also on a hoverboard during this entire scene, which is also a barrier of French, a barrier of entry for me. Yeah, she has been, has asked for a divorce, so he got fired from his job and he's staying in Jersey. And she tells us the old Shreys cries surprise but this series has Shasha my alter he goes like oh no we're gonna try and push this Shasha thing it's just like one of those ericadjane things where she's like this way of ericadjane and this way of ericadjeraity you're like you're literally the same like one of you wear it's a sweatshirt occasionally yeah Sh, Shasha. Yeah, that the I have to say

Shasha was not that different from regular. Is it Shasha or Chacha? I think was Shasha, right? I think it's not because it's very close to Beyonce's Sasha fears. And it's probably Sasha, but it's with her speech impediment. She's saying Shasha. Shasha. And she has no creativity. So she's just stealing whatever she's hearing on the radio. She's like taking it and then making it her own and also all these Declarations of being revitalized and reborn and revived and renewed and all this stuff So tiresome. Yeah, I mean we're gonna get baptized like you bitches need it Yeah, I mean if you want to be reborn why don't you have a party on the second floor of your house?

How about that? Yeah, and also how about once you tell us about how, you know, you know, after all this stuff, like, I'm reborn, I'm a new woman, I'm just in that, I'm like, you're still with Eddie, though, you're still married to Eddie. Oh, yeah. I mean, maybe that'll, I mean, maybe the divorce is moving forward, but she didn't say there was never a moment of like, so I said to him, fine, I'm leaving your ass, fine. This, that was, I was expecting to hear that where he said, she's like so I said to him, fine, I'm leaving your ass fine. That was the I was expecting to hear that where he said where she's like, he decided to stay in New Jersey

and he's going to have a girlfriend, whatever. And so I said, fine, give me the give me divorce papers. Your ass is out of this house. But that did not that moment did not come. Maybe we'll come this season. We should find out later when she's going through all her clothes in her closet and she's throwing stuff out. And she says, well, he better get a new job because we're throwing out all these clothes. And I'm like, okay, so you're divorcing him. He moved out of the house, but you're still expecting a new wardrobe. This is a woman who's not going to be making divorce very easy. This divorce could go on a decade. This will run, this divorce will

run longer than cheers. Yeah, Sasha. Sasha, and she saying, well, Sasha, you know, I'm going to I have a rat for Sasha. She said, I'm rolling on a rolly thing, get information. Like, oh, God, you're just stealing Beyonce lyrics and adding rolling things to it. Luminate is going to be her album. It's original. It's a Sasha original lemonade. It's original. It's a shot shot original lemonade Like what I'm doing this line bucket challenge for lemonade Blackie with the with the okay hair But let me for blackie

Lucky with the crooked weave And so also did it she's like Becky with the good hair need some work And so also did it. She's like Becky with the good hair needs some work. God, are you two just going to say Beyonce line for whole season? So now this is when we start to get, we get some insight into what's going on with these women. They are beefing. They're having, they're in the middle of a good old fashioned beef. And, uh, Jacelle's kind of in the wrong in this one. And you know I'm big just jazel, I'm a jazel apologist and I do not like Sherees,

but even I have to admit that jazel is wrong because basically at the reunion last year, when Sherees is like, I forget what the original, what caused her to say, but she's like, I don't go around telling everyone that you're a slut. And she's like, well, I'm not a slut. She's like, are you, are you? So she implied that Giselle was a slut, which now,

was that Giselle had dated all those guys. And she's like, yeah, she's basically like, well, I don't take that and make you a whore. And she's like, but I'm not a whore. Because I didn't say you were a whore. She's like, well, you're in blind. But I said it. And she's like, what you said, you're a whore. She's like, but I'm not a whore because I didn't say you were a whore. She's like, well, you're in blind. I said it. She's like, well, you said you're a whore. Well, Sharice did say something that was, Sharice did say something that was leading. I forget what it was.

There was some sort of implication there. But either way, Jizelle took it and ran with it and has now like saying, she's saying I'm a whore who sticks fists up my vagina. Yada, yada, yada. She said I fucked a donkey. So there she's getting a horse and she's fucking a fireman And this is like the worst and she went on watch what happens live and he's like whoa That's huge groundbreaking news. I was like no one even knows who Jacelle is that show had like five viewers last week And yeah, because the other the other star the other guest on that episode was Mike from Shaza Sunset. He's sitting there being like I lost the love of my life the love of my life My shoes were laid to a party. So you were like my brother, any? You're like my brother. Yeah. So her huge gossip is that Syris is fucking a fireman. And she's like, yeah, he's very tall and mussely.

Like, that's the worst rumour to spread because it's complementary, you know? Yeah. Like any woman trying to get back out there and sing sexy or being sexy again, because you know these housewives, we're about to enter her moment of my vagina still works. Yeah. Season storyline. So I don't see why she's so mad,

but just so got back by saying it. The reason why she's mad, which I think is the reason why a lot of these women get mad, and when these things happen, because they happen a lot, is because there's a divorce impending, and I think is a reason why a lot of these women get mad and when these things happen because they happen a lot is because There's a divorce impending and I think that going around saying that she has a side piece would maybe reduce or it would it would weaken her position in terms of bargaining for things. So that's probably I mean, I guess argument could be made. They've been separated for so long that who cares? It's not really cheating But I see what you mean. Yeah, it's totally I mean, I guess the argument could be made. They've been separated for so long that who cares? It's not really cheating, but I see what you mean.

Yeah, it's totally different. I mean, they both, they're both in the long run. They're both in the long run. They're both in the long run. They're both in the long run. They're both in the long run. They're both in the long run. They're both in the long run.

They're both in the long run. They're both in the long run. They're both in the long run. They're both in the long run. They're both in the long run. Yeah, exactly. Because, you know, Jiselle was a bit outrageous. And she even said it by the way.

She's like, well, you know, you know, she gave me a little bit and I just came back like tenfold, you know? Yeah. So she was actually almost proud of it. And then Sheree's though, you're right though, it did seem to be, you know, she seemed to react. Where she should have just been like whatever, but instead she sent a season to assist.

And that's sort of overkill too. And again, she does the same thing. I'm gonna close my damn. There are two of the ones from last season who were just starting fights for no reason and being mean for no reason You know, she started off season by being mad that Sherees was being loud in her kitchen I mean that was like why she was mad and she went upstairs to check on

I'm like, yeah, I mean, they're not ridiculous. Just making shit up. So it'll be fun seeing you know I guess how they're trying to ruin each other's life this time. I just think that Jacelle is really funny. So she gets the edge for me. Sure. And the thing is this though, that fight about making like the kitchen and just all checking on her upstairs was so petty, I kind of loved it. So you know, that's, that's like my sweet spot. I love a petty fight. Yeah.

It's based off of like, well, that was pretty. I mean, look, I hate the show and I wish is everybody on it except Ashley would Diahorrible fiery death, but I can still have fun and laugh at it. I mean, okay I'm not a monster. Yeah, so speaking of Ashley. She's taking a dance lesson because There's a ball point out one thing. I can't let it go. I'm sorry Sirie, this is one reason I will always laugh at stories. She says things like this This is one reason I will always laugh at stories. She says things like this. Sasha, my alter ego, like she wants to live a good,

she wants to live good, smell good, and eat good, and good good. How is that different from your regular personality? Like who doesn't want to smell good and eat good? You fucking talk. Yeah. Okay. I also have concerns with the fact that her nickname, Shasha, sounds like it might be a youth

medicine for like a vagina. And also, Shasha. Shaa. Shaa. And then Juzel's still getting her hair done and she's telling Kya, like, I don't understand why she would be so mad at me. I mean, what is her deal? She's a monster and he's like, well, girl, she's mad at herself because she's

going for someone that doesn't want her and she, you know, she's just trying to blame you and yell at you because she can't yell at him because he won't answer his phone. And then so she's taking this as true fact, just else. Well, I think it's not a turbo. Why is she mad at me? Because she doesn't have a husband. Oh, so now she's going to yell at me because she's sad and so she's going to go out with thinking that that's the reason because Cal told her. It's like, Oh, so now she's gonna yell at me because she sat and so she's gonna go out with thinking that That's the reason because Cal told her. It's like oh, I think it's not a bad I don't think it's a terrible reasoning, but what I but what the weird the The reason why it's frustrating to watch is because Jacelle is like what did I do?

You know, so no you did something because you went on to watch what happens and you talk shit. But I do think these big statements like the minute you throw a rock at me, I'm going to break your house down. Okay, okay, just so. So that's probably why because you broke her house down. So, meanwhile, there's this weird runner in this episode because in the off season, in this episode because in the off season, Jacelle competed in some sort of dance competition for Hill Harper, the actor Hill Harper. And she is this season going to be a judge on the latest exhibition situation

and Ashley is going to be competing. So she's at a dance lesson with Tion and she can't dance very well, but she tells us that her restaurant, shockingly, is not doing well. They've gone through two chefs, two general managers, and then she's like, and also people don't like the food. People weren't taking our film. And then they show a clip of the restaurant, and it's her, she's like, Well, King of Ruse good.

They're like, no, gross. No, it's good. Gross. Really, you mean it? Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting.

Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident not-so-expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking. Oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone.

So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. You want some emu? You can listen ad free on the Amazon music or Wendry app. You want some E-Mew? I think someone may have been Derek Hazleton. I think he said that we should look at the Yelp reviews for the restaurant because they're hilarious and how bad they are. I didn't pull them off, I forgot.

But that would, that might be something point to do on the bonus episode or something. Okay, yeah, that sounds fun. I love a bad yelp. So then we go over to Robin and Robins kids now hate her. They've moved 45 minutes out of town to like Hey, where closer Baltimore haven't heard it was Hanover, Hanover, Hanover, Maryland. And it's a really cute place. I mean, it's small, but it's way cuter than our last place, I think, like it looks newer. It's a really cute place, but her kids catered. Yeah. And she's like,

my kids used to listen to me when they were younger, and now they just think I'm a joke. You guys want to eat? They're like, you eat. Okay. It's a time for today's slime challenge. You making new friends, honey. You already know that And then Juan comes in I was like, Rar, Juan is so cute. Oh, what an asshole. He's such a dick. What a horrible human being get him out of your house You could do better. You're gorgeous Well, okay, I was not expecting that He's so disrespectful to her. I didn't think that he was. I don't think he was like so. I mean, because he was, she was like, can you hold me move

a bed? And he's like, maybe I'm not sure. She's like, yeah, well, you know, this is really emotional. He's like, I don't really care. And she's like, I don't think I'm going to be a fan of. She's showing him her computer. And it's a picture of her on her wallpaper. He's like, you have yourself as your wallpaper.

She's like, well, I'm trying to make myself feel better. And he's like, you're just mad. He's still he's still our jokes. He's still our jokes. That's all because we would have been the one to comment about her. She's a picture of herself on her wallpaper or she's, you know, she's online trying to find a cheap bed for their bedroom. And they have to do it on a budget because they're broke because of him.

And so she's like, well, I'm good. I was thinking it's been like, it's nice, but I would have to put it together. And he goes, well, you're a handy girl. What the fuck, dude? You could do it. Well, I really, well, do you have time Saturday for me? He's like, no, why not? Well, I don't know.

Maybe I'll have something to do. It's so fun. I mean, I see what you're saying. It is kind of take us now in retrospect, but when I was watching it, I was not know, maybe I'll have something to do. It's so fun. I mean, I see what you're saying. It is kind of diggish now in retrospect. But when I was watching it, I was not like, what an asshole. Maybe I was just like staring at him or something. But if that's how it treats her on TV, imagine how Rudy is when there's not even cameras there.

What a dig. Yeah, I mean, yeah, it's so funny. I was just like, I thought they were just having just... Just like he's not chatter. No, I just read it as just chatter, you know, that he, he, I just hate you. Not so, no, he know he doesn't hate her. He wants, he was, he's trying to get back with her and she's the one who won't, who won't take him back because he cheated one. Not that's bad. She's not cheated on Robin because I actually, I really like Robin a lot. She's, she's one of my favorites. of my favorites. And she's, you know, I think

she's a total catch. She seems, she seems relatively bright and she's pretty and good mom. It seems like. So yeah, he should not have cheated on me. He actually said she's trying to spend time with him or whatever. And he goes, she goes, well, there's like some kind of block in our relationship that keeps me from looking at it twice, like to reconsider. And he sits down and starts playing video games and ignoring her. I'm like, that's kind of it right there. She's like, you want to talk?

And he's like, I'm playing a video game. Yeah, the block is the fact that he cheated on you and you now can never trust him again. And yet you still let him sleep in your bed. That's the problem there. She goes, can you tentatively put me on your schedule for Saturday in case nothing better comes along? And he's like, you're talking during my game. Oh, sorry.

I'll be in the back getting slimed. Anybody want to slide me anyone He won't hurt us that Elbroker disease So Robbins starts talking about this jazel and she's a situation and she's saying that she's torn because she's friends with both of them But I'm getting the vibe that she's more team sure is because she base was saying like whoa Jazel was kind of in the wrong. She's kind of as wrong. And to me, I feel like Robin is the, she's the battle state, right? She's Ohio. And whoever gets Robin is going to win this feud. And I think that Sherice is getting Robin, which means that Jacelle is going to be the villain.

Well, you know that in off season, Sheree is probably a better friend. Like, they probably actually talked to each other because they both have husbands who hate them and don't pay them any minds. So they've got that in common. And Giselle just seems like the type who's like super obsessed with fame and probably ignores them during the offseason, you know. So probably Giselle is probably the type that would do anything to ensure her spot on the show. Yeah, get a pretty craven. However, again, she really is so funny to me. So she gets away with pretty much anything in my book.

Okay, so now we get to Karen and her husband in the car, because they're going to shop for a new house. Uh, she's like, this is not downsize. And this is resizing resizing to something that's down in budget in size, but it's not a downsize. And he's saying, uh, now, you know, some of these, some of these requirements we may have to talk about on your list. He's like, no, this is my list. And it's a list that you shall look at because it's a list of me. It's like, oh, shut up.

And he's like, now, are you sure a pool is a requirement? We don't even have kids to be jumping in that pool. She's like, a pool is a requirement because that's where I'm going to drown your ass. You don't give me a pool. I would like two pools one to swim in and one who's the next one neighbor who could check in on us She's like they they show up at this some house and they have this like this hot real estate couple That's helping them they probably have an HGTV show for all I know That's the way it always is on these on these housewives shows so it's the it's like is on these housewives shows.

So it's like a husband and wife team, I think. And the hot husband looks just miserable. He's been dealing with Karen for some months now and he just hates this. He just doesn't say anything the entire time, pretty much. And they show up and Karen's like, well, this is a half driveway. And I need a full circle so I can drive the car around

and emerge from the driveway and just put on my blinker and drive out drive out of the car Drive out of the driveway. He goes this way. I have to back out. Yeah, he goes you could back out. She goes oh Already have you read my list? It's not a maybe list. It's a Karen list. I need everything on the list. I'm like oh geez So he's already depressed walking in there like this is gonna suck, you know, so he's already depressed walking in. They're like, this is going to suck, you know, and she's like, black bill gates wants to keep Karen happy. So he needs to expand his empire with me. I'm like, you literally don't even make sense when you talk. So she walks in the front door and it's the grand entry with a chandelier and she goes, oh, my chandelier could touch the floor in here. Yeah. So could you do it?

So do your tips. What's your point? She's like, I thought you knew my demands. I faxed them over to you this morning. Did you not receive my facts? Do you not know how to read more code? Then she goes, you know, people in California want 90210. People in this area want 208.54.

I'm like the only people who want to live in 90210 are assholes, by the way. As two people who live in this city, the only people who are specifically say I need to be in 90210 are assholes. You know who lives in 90210? It's like people from, it's like Reza, okay? Assholes, you know who lives in I don't know. It's like people from it's like it's like Reza, okay?

People here want five nine three two six seven dash Five two five five No, they don't no one cares People here want PO box three six nine five is great great post office. She tells them Don't listen to my husband because the problem with black bill gates is that he can take anything and make it work. I'm not interested in making it work. I want what I want. And the real thing is like you want to strangle each other to death when we're done with his bits. one, we're done with his bits. She's like, now I'm concerned about this living room. I don't know how we're going to fit a couch and our enormous

1997 tube TV in here. And that's at least three feet deep. So not a lot of them for walking. Well, you can mount it on the wall. Uh, it weighs about 600 pounds. So I don't think so. Sir, I mean, I can't believe she's just not impressed with the place with a new kitchen. I mean, her kitchen is from like three company days, you know, like there's no

phones plugged into the walls. I'm sorry. Where can I put my Mr. coffee? So we got a sherry next who has her tiny little gay. What's his name? Fredrick. She's she finally found a gay and she let him upstairs.

Oh, girl. And he's like a typical cliche. He's like, girl, everything. Keshe, Keshe, missy. He's like, um, yeah, he's trying to be Mikey. And he's young. He's young. He's still has to work on his own voice.

He's like a very tiny, like little, little person gay. I'm not sure. He's just very little. I think last year I thought he was a lesbian, right? Oh, no, that was a nanny. No, that was the, remember there was a nanny, and I was like, that's a little lesbian, nanny. Oh, yeah, that was Katie's nanny.

Yeah, Katie's nanny, yeah. Yeah. So now here we basically, this is Sheree's, she's dressinganny. Yeah. Yeah. Um, so now here we basically, this is Sheree's, she's dressing up in dresses. It's, it's like a typical kind of rom-com moment, a moment of self impairment. And it's, and he's like, yeah, it's everything. And we learned that this is, this is when we learned that Eddie wants a divorce. And Sheree's is just doing the no more toxic life. I want to revive all, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Well, I had to write down every word

just so I could get like his angle, his gangle. And he's like, yes, mama, loving it. Here we go, sub, gossip, gossip. What's going on with you and jeez, honey? Yes, honey, yes. That's like, oh, good. Shut up. She's like, every girl needs a girl like Sheldon.

It's like, okay, that's kind of insulting, but okay. She goes, well, you know that Jade's been long TV and she was talking about me. So I put a thief to it with a thief and a thief. She was so proud of this. So proud of this move. I went to a to do it. Good old stories.

Shasha. Shasha. I'm not a poor fake bitch with no friends that she doesn't have to pay. So over at Ashley Ashley's restaurant, this one is cracking me up because the honeymoon is over in this relationship. Yeah. Mike's only 36 people there, by the way. Yeah. He is pissed. He's pissed. He's hating everything about this. He does not understand why people aren't loving kangaroo. He doesn't get it. Well, now they've changed. So here's the thing. They've changed the menu now. They got a fairly hot chef in there. And they're going to basically do American food within Australian slant. So I guess it'll be sort of like fosters or something like that. And so the this chef, he's basically their chef Joe. He, I think his name is Brad.

Chef Brad. I would not leave my hot young cute wife who's at the restaurant 13 hours a day with a chef with a chef. Who's also at the restaurant 13 hours a day with a chef with a chef who's also at the restaurant 13 hours a day. Not once. Yeah. Yeah. Well I think that especially when you ain't fucking your wife. Well Michael probably has an ulterior motive. He probably wants to, you know, all three of them. If you work on the swing, you say it. So yeah, so then chef Brad starts showing off his food and when Michael's like like you charge in 22 do all of the way I give beef it's not very good it costs 70 dollars she's like oh She's

And he's over and he goes this is where he gets to be a dick He's like well when he did likes break even because you know what break even point millions. And then we flash back to last season where he promises her, he'll consider giving her a baby if she breaks even at the restaurant. And you tell me that baby hot thorn or baby street sign might be delayed because because of Wai-gu. What was her second baby name? It's like a mother.

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Robin 45 miles away. So Giselle gets a tour. And then it's only a matter of time before they start talking about Sherees. And Robin actually says that Gislle is wrong. And Jacelle says, well, you know, Sherees told me that she cheats on Eddie, at which point Robin is basically like, I don't know how I feel about Jacelle spilling Sherees' secrets, what she had to do with my secrets, which to confirm, I believe,

that Jacelle's gonna be the enemy. Yeah, I mean, Jacelle's just horrible. Like doing that is horrible on a house. We're supposed to be where you're really friends and you're like we're not going to talk about this on TV in the sheet does just because she's mad at some stupid thing. Um, but also she's saying things like this. I look through that house and you know, some say if it ain't broke, don't fix it, but it is broke. You know, she's saying things like that with well, she said it was broke. Well, wait a second though,

but that was she was referring to Giselle and Juan's real relationship and that's what she's saying is broke, is the fact that she's sharing a bed with a guy, she doesn't wanna get back together with him and yet she's sort of, she's sharing a bed with him, which means that she's limiting her potential

to go out in the world. Like she's, she's, it's like a defense with him, which means she's limiting her potential to go out in the world like she's she's It's like a defense mechanism almost, you know fear of rejection. Yeah, yeah, yeah, so I think that was what it was referring to I don't think she was I mean maybe I'm being nice about this I don't think that because she clear she said right after that. I just want Katie. I mean, I just want Robin to sleep in the same bed with a man. She, right? Isn't that what you said right after that? I don't know. After that, I just wrote SMH. Yeah, I don't think she was saying referring to her financial status. I think she was saying like their relationship is broke.

Oh, okay. It can't like how can you know, how can you afford it? Yeah, I can't argue with her on that one. So then we go to Ashley Yeah, I can't argue with her on that one. So then we go to Ashley the theater or whatever where she's doing this before that I have to say that there was a promo for watch what happens after that. And Andy Cohen is full on losing his voice. He is smoking way too many cigarettes. Have you noticed his voice is just turning into a rasp? He needs to stop. I don't know that he smokes cigarettes. I think that he smokes a lot of weed. Yeah. Well, either way, he's getting smokers voice because I quit for three years. I quit smoking, but I still had like the coffin stuff because we the joints, they're harsher because you don't

even have the filter. You know, it's just like straight target your lungs. Yeah. He's like, guys, you're going to want to watch this. She she and she and she may be there will be a love connection cut off For this charity event and Karen and Jizelle standing next to each other is hilarious because they both got these huge fake boobs and They're both trying to like kind of keep them in tonight for whatever reason And they're both trying to kind of keep them in tonight for whatever reason. They're both kind of strapped and Karen's like, her boobies are out, but she looks cute. I'm like, you both look fucking ridiculous and amazing. And I liked it at one point.

Karen was like, I like big. I like big things. Can't you tell? And she points at her boobs. I'm not good with small. The two things that I like big in this to laugh big boobs and a big tube TV Big phones like a really big TV my TV needs to have at least four feet of clearance from the wall So series the girls kind of show up and just sells like ready for this Syriis moment,

you know, and they're, what did she say? She will put them through Chinese water torture. I don't know what she was talking about Karen. I remember Karen said, now Chinese water torture, I don't remember what the context was. I just heard it. I think they were talking, because they were asking Jiselle about Sherees. And then Sherees comes in and Jiselle's like, that girl has got stuck face.

It's just stuck. Well, that's true too. That is, that is Sherees' face. I just feel like she was trying to say stink, but she was saying stink. So Sherees comes and a, Cherice is like, Cherice arrives just as Karen's saying,

she's lashing out, lashing out in pain. We're talking about you darling. Cherice is like, well, actually, think these days talking about me, isn't it? Everybody likes talking about me these days. I'm like, oh, Cherice, Cherice isn't fight mode where she's just gonna make zero cents.

And she's extra scarier because she's on a hoverboard. So she's a little taller. I just imagine she's on a hoverboard for the rest of the season, the entire time. She's just making circles. Yeah. Yeah. She knows she practiced for that in the off season

because she came back, she's doing circles around the kitchen. I mean, she's for that in the offseason because she came back. She's doing circles around the kids and I mean she's got it. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha.

Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. Shasha. spoken. So Michael in dressing room being like with a city attitude Robin and Ceres, uh, go upstairs and you talk she thinks you called her a horror. Oh yeah. So Ceres is like, what's what's your problem? You talked to her and she's like, yeah, I talked to her. Like she thinks you called her a horror. I mean, I didn't take it that way. like she thinks you called her a war. I mean, I didn't take it that way.

All right. Can you speak up a bit? Should we sign some slime in my year? You know, Albroker challenge. There's no starts. And Karen is like trying to be the Simon Cowell, even though she's not a judge. But it's like kids, it's kids. Like it's literal kids, you know, of all different weights and hair brushing states. And they're like doing the Roger Rabbit. And she's like, that feels a little robotic to me. Karen, they're literally doing the robot. I was like, you know what I, you know what I would do well is the tax machine.

This whole dance room is a ripoff from that film Roger rap they're doing the Roger rabbit Karen I don't understand they're doing the Roger rabbit but they don't look like their cartoons to me give it a three are they dancing or swimming they're doing the swim Karen look like a bunch of monkeys. That's the monkey, Aaron. Look at that girl with her stanky leg. They're doing the stanky leg. I've mashed potatoes more smoothly than those girls who dance. Smash potato, Karen! Look at her, there's trotting along like a bunch of foxes.

The fox trot. Well, that girl needs to just shuffle off to Buffalo. She literally is. You know, they would be doing better if they could just get it, they could be more insane. You know, it takes two to tango after all. That's exactly what the two of them are doing. They're doing a tango. So Ashley just comes out and she's like, that's my impression of her dancing. It's like a mix between twerking and just bending over a lot. Yeah, get pretty much and then she talks isn't a chair.

So then it's like, what's Giselle going to rate her? What's Giselle going to give her? So Giselle gives her a 10, which was basically a message saying, please be on my side for the season. Thank you very much. I gave you a 10 in front of Hill Harper. I will be talking about how you fucked your chef on national TV if you ignore this 10 that I'm about to give you. And then Jacelle, she's like, I think Jacelle says that Ashley grew on her or maybe that was Karen, but either way, Jacelle

is like, I have a soft spot for Ashley and her perky booty and her big bush. That really makes me want to go to Oz now. There's how to market your restaurant. I mean, I know that there's the Australia has a bush, but they both actually said that she'd grown on them and Karen goes, that girl, she's grown on me, dude. What? Are you? Did said, dude, she goes, she's grown on me, dude. She's annoying as hell. Really very stupid. And she has terrible accommodations in her in her beach house in Delaware. But you know, so they're on the dressing room and Teresa's like,

well, Jesus, I gotta talk to you in just a sec. I was like, oh, I've gotta date. So we can talk later. You don't have five minutes. And she's extra scary because she's still on her roly thing and she's in fluorescent lights. And that is not. She's circling around.

She's circling around, as well, menacingly, like in West Side Story or something. Sasa. Sasa. circle around, she's circling around, as L, menacing? So they go outside to talk and she's like, I don't understand why you would say. And just like, because maybe you shouldn't call me a whore. And it was just a nonsensical fight that went away. Because she's like, you're wrong. Like, you're wrong. She's like, well, bye, then she's like, well, bye. And she's like, don't let the zip code fool you. Just like, you're wrong. She's like, well, bye then. She's like, well, bye. And she's like, don't let the ship co-full you.

She's like, what's that mean? Is that from it? Is that actually from a song? Yeah, she's always like, that girl. She goes, that girl. She hears that in a song, and she repeats it with whatever, you know, she repeats it, not knowing whatever it means or whatever.

That is like actually such a mom thing to do. It's like bling on fleek. So then she goes up and she's like, well, that was non-eventful. I love how you keep blowing the wind or teeth. I know I want to work on my history as a person, too, because I feel like it's so easy because all she does is swallow her her Swallow her words Don't you like it when we workshop our accents on the podcast and like that. It's like a peak behind the curtain What not with not that's not even the same wrong the zip code a peak behind the curtain. What not live not.

That's not even the same. Well, the zip code hit you in the ass. No, you got it all wrong. Sharice. The word on the three of the time with zip code. No, Sharice. The word on the street is bump. It says bump on the street because it's going to be a speed bump coming up.

No, Sharice, not that literal. So Karen, basically all the ladies on this show, just try and think of trendy minds as they can repeat. Karen's like, both of those girls just should have stayed in their lane. What does that even mean in this context? Yeah. She's like, it's a hot mess now. Well, now that Shasha is on her 100 boards, she just can't seem to go in a straight path anymore. Swirling around, getting each other's lands. Oh, God. And that brings us to the end of real housewives of Pizzo,

May. By the way, one last comment about it. I really enjoy the Potomac generic music and I was I was happy to hear it back on the uregan. I didn't realize how much I missed it until I was there Duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh you know in between scenes. They changed their Moving between scenes like when they show the housewives posing and they're like And they show them posing in their way. It's like, Sharif, they change that, right? Because there's a lot of columns now in that.

Like, great column art guys. No, I think they had columns last year too. You know, the, the, those famous Greek ruins in Patelamek. You know, how Patelamek is known for it's, uh, inventing the law and holding actually it's been such it's probably a reference to the neoclassical architecture of that region you know like UVA and Jefferson's home was it mon I want to say monocido, but it's not monocido. Maybe it is monocido Either way, there's a lot of neoclassical Monocito. Maybe it is Monocito. Either way, there's a lot of neoclassical architecture around there in that region in Potomac and DC and like God, that's just Artorial. So the so the columns are probably a reference to the way the houses look there.

Well, there you go, everybody. You learn something new every time you listen. I will give you a little nugget of the end? That could be totally wrong, but I'm gonna go that off with a little wagoo with the end Little underpriced wagoo All right everybody we'll talk to you next time Yeah talk to tomorrow for some Venopump rules reunion Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or, you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. us about yourself by completing a short survey at wundry.com slash survey.