Watch What Crappens - #484 RHONY: Selfie Awareness Day
Episode Date: June 23, 2017Ramona gets some edge on Real Housewives of New York, okaaaay? Tom’s exes all show up at her Edgy Party with already told secrets, and lots of people wear terrible furs. Enjoy!Subscribe at ...http://www.patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens for bonus episodes, ringtones, and live group video chat parties. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Hello and welcome to the watch what crapppens Podcast! The podcast about all that crap we just love to talk about on Yeo Bros.
I'm Ronnie Karen from TrashTalkTV and the RosePrix Bachelor podcast,
currently the RosePrix Bachelor at Podcast.
And here I am with my gorgeous, talented social butterfly of a friend,
Ben Mandelker of the Beastluft vlog in the Bantel Lither.
Hi, Benji.
Hey, what's going on?
Can't believe it. It's Thursday. It's real housewives of New York City day.
And you know, Ronnie, this has been an exciting week for us pertaining, you know,
in regards to real house is a New York city because our song, our Lewand song, do the Dagestino officially went on sale.
I earlier in the week we reported that we had submitted it, but now it's actually
on sale on iTunes and Google Play and Amazon Music and we know there are
many millions of copies. Have we so repaid? I don't know. See, the thing the thing is all those places they have they send their
reports to CD baby which is where I like published it through and I iTunes sends their reports six weeks
after the end of the month so we're not going to know for like two months but it's people are buying it
they're buying it so I feel like I feel like we're probably sold like, you know.
I just love that.
I just love that.
Oh, man.
Cool.
It's just cool.
It's weird.
It's weird to think because we have a podcast that appears on iTunes.
Okay.
And we're like used to that.
But there's something about selling a song on iTunes that feels
weirdly professional and grown up.
And it's just hilarious to me.
I guess you've been published on there for a while but this is my first song and I'm
I just feel like a regular David Foster. I think I've sold about four copies of my own and
that's because I've changed my iTunes name about four times and rebodied it for myself.
So there would be something on there.
Everybody, what a day.
We also spent today talking to Katie Kazzorla
about the second wise club and some of her general opinions
of the seasons, Real Housewives of New York.
That was a super fun app.
That'll be posted as a special bonus
you guys can check out today.
And we also spoke with invite only Cabo's Larry and Emily and laughed our asses off for about 45 minutes.
Yeah, they were great. We're going to error that episode on Monday, which is when we normally cover invite only Cabo.
So that's going to be on Monday because there's no, there's actually no episode of invite only Cabo this Sunday, same with Potomac. So instead, you'll get this interview with them.
And it was so good that Emily, I think, got fired from her job in the middle of it.
So because she was recording you guys from her.
Do you have a Larry? She was working on a Christian Cavalry set.
If she got fired for talking too loud.
I mean, that is so perfect for this show.
So so good.
And what was your butt?
I was gonna say and but you have a butt.
Yeah, no, no, no.
I will always allow an and before a butt man.
Okay, I've studied improv and I take my comedy pretty seriously, Ben.
Like a yes and well, yes and today is also special because guess what?
Um, we have a shout out to, uh, to Caitlin and Alex.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Is it a birthday?
Why do I feel like they, it was a wedding?
I think they got married.
Caitlin and Alex, you got married?
For a moment, I thought the reason why I got confused
is because for a moment, I was about to say happy birthday.
But then I was like, wait a second, I think that they actually
got married.
Caitlin and Alex, happy wedding to you people.
Wedding slash birthday.
May it last at least five years until you're
able to get past the pre-nauble loss. Is it five years until you're able to get past the pre-nup loss. Is it five years been?
I don't know what it is, but all I know is they got the yacht. No, that's awesome. You guys,
that's so cool. I hope you guys have had a wonderful wedding. Yeah, so.
You guys, Caitlin and Alex got married, and this is from your friend Sharon.
Yeah, so you guys Caitlin and Alex got married and this is from your friend Sharon in
Shannin loves you guys so much she says you're an amazing couple and being around them absolutely makes Cinnical people like myself believe in genuine life long love and partnerships and I'm so excited for them
And you know what?
I'm so excited for them too because I can't remember the last time a friend got married that I was like this is really inspiring
Usually I'm like, this is really inspiring.
Usually I'm like, oh my God, those two,
I'm gonna be on the phone with that bitch
while she's crying for the next 10 years, you know?
So it's good to hear that there's real love out there
and that people are engaging in it.
Yeah, actually technically they're getting married
this Saturday.
Can you believe it, girls?
They're getting married, Caleb and Alex.
I hope you're listening to this on your honeymoon
while you're getting jiggy
with your husband on the yacht girls.
We got the yacht.
We got the yacht.
We have a friend who knows Luan,
and I was texting him saying,
you have to get this song to Luan.
And he said, well, she is right now she's on a yacht
in the middle of somewhere.
And no, it's not borrowed.
It's actually Tom's yacht.
It's like, okay.
I like that you specify that
because you know I'm gonna be making fun
of that shit later, so thanks.
Thanks for knowing me.
So well, friend.
Seriously.
Wow, so much, so much on-packed.
So anyway, yes.
Have a great wedding, you guys.
Have a great time on your yacht, Luann.
Everyone else
go by the single and for the rest of us, we are gonna dive into Real House
as a New York. Shall we? I'm so excited. I love this show. I left my nuts off
every downtime and this episode was no exception. The episode was entitled
Regency Reunion. So you know the Bethany is standing somewhere
with like some long selfie stick getting ready to get somebody in trouble.
Everyone has t-shirts on for the reunion.
Yeah, and it happened on National Selfie Day.
Did you know that?
Oh, no.
Oh, wow.
How appropriate.
Yeah.
And who made that?
Who made National Selfie Day?
Um, I, you know, house wife probably me. Yeah awful
And yeah, I'll probably take one that was how awful. I'm gonna post a selfie right now. That was yesterday
well, oh
You see how about it's a later gram later gram throwback Thursday. So flashback
I mean throwback Thursday to national selfie day Wednesday and
SDW.
Hmm.
So the previous leaves don't worry. I don't have notes on the Vs. I just was laughing because
you know that Dale, Tinsley's mom is going to be back on this episode because they showed
her in the previous leaves. And I just love and she's like, well, do you bring Sonya little treats? Cookies or something?
No, how to fight the tiny little part of her mouth that still moves.
And I just thought it was so cute that Sonya's friend is like,
just take Sonya treats. She's just like a little cute puppy that needs some treats.
She just needs treats. Treats go a long way in this world.
If I had more treats, I'd probably be a happier person.
It does. Like, for example, we learn Sonya's really just dating Rocco because he gets her free pizza.
Yeah. Exactly. That's a free pizza.
A wonderful thing.
A wonderful thing. Because it doesn't count as calories if it's free.
I know. That's why I stick with dominoes because they have that like frequent flyer card or whatever and so if you order enough
It's like congratulations. You've won a free pizza
And I just it just feels like a very low calorie hug
Yeah, thanks Tom. Did you see did you see that one of our listeners is a Domino's delivery person who says that they
They listened to the podcast that helps them get through their shifts. Did you see that?
I thought of you immediately.
No, that's amazing. And if they ever show up on my tracker, I'm going to just freak out and marry them because that's fate.
Oh my God. So, sorry, we are just like a little crazy today because it's the end of our week and like I already drank a lot of coffee and
we've just been gabbing with people all day. So now I feel like a disaster.
We've just been laughing so hard. Okay, so time to laugh some more. We open with
tinsel and carol going to lunch and they're in this. They're having like a weird bad for off Tinsleys in a collarless gray for no
Yeah, she's with a sleeveless for with a collar. It's like a gray for and then Carol is in a collarless
Grafer that looks like a house cat for not sure
Not sure what's going on there, but it's kind of I mean Tinsley has the collar and
Then Carol's got the sleeves so it feels like a friendship that can work.
It's like as Tyra Banks would say each girl has what the other one needs. Or as Tyra Banks
would say, we were rooting for you. We were all rooting for you. So they're having lunch and Carol is like, wow, well, I wasn't sure about
tensile at first. She's a bit much, but she's genuine and at least I enjoy her
small talk. Okay, Carol. Yeah, because you add so much to every conversation
you're in. Yeah. Carol, by the way, once she removed her fur, was wearing this
crazy sweater of this giant
face.
And I tried to do a Snapchat face effect on it, but it just could not register it.
And then I tried to do it on her on Carol's face.
And it also could not register.
So Carol and Snapchat do not work well together.
Well, it's like if cartoons became real and they could age, it was like Betty Boop playing
babygay.
It was like Betty Boop kind of being
Carol's friend, you know, like, boop boop boop boop.
So the big news is that Tinsley's mom is coming to town, this is what Tinsley says.
And on top of that, even bigger news is that tinsley and Carol went to some winter
wonderland party and it got ridden up in the in the post and and the post said that Ann
Hathaway looks radiant and the women are like, she didn't look that radiant if you asked
me. I was like, I love that Carol even hates airpath away.
Yeah, I mean, what does everybody hate her?
I mean, I know why, because I've seen her
have acceptance speeches and she's like,
I would like to think the artist is surround me
and feel me with the joy and the art that is necessary
to create a human that I created today.
Am I supposed to princess Diaries, bitch, please stop. Yeah, I'm like, you're the Teen Choice Wars. You're about to get slimed by the
bloody rubber. I'd like to thank the scientists who created this
group to fall on my head. So yeah, I know. Thank you. But I just think it's
funny that Carol even hates that half the way she's like oh she wasn't very stunning
So they went and they showed a clip of them at this winter wonderland ball at the botanical gardens and they were in more bad first
This time they were in like cream house cat first
So these a lot of her and then she read the when she was reading the part about them
Also Carol's font on her phone is like 30 point which is hilarious
People were seen whispering as tinsley made her debut back into society
With pal author and team age fucker Carol
I like that people were seen whispering as if as if this were the princess Diaries one of those particular scenes where people are like
People don't do that in real life, okay people really don't whisper in from someone's face to be like who is that? I mean if they were they were like did that girl curl her hair
We sort of expected her hair would be a little shorter, maybe a different color,
maybe some lowlights, huh, but she's still doing that curl. Weird. Are they wearing housecats?
Is that baby? Oh, so Carol's trying to, you know, tens of these like, I didn't sleep well,
and the past is my present. It's not that long ago. You know, not a post-traumatic
like stress syndrome, like a post-traumatic, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, I'm so
motivated for Palm Beach. Um, and Carol's like, well, if I was coming back, isn't it,
girl, I would reinvent myself, maybe cut your hair, maybe. Did you notice that Carol has
reinvented herself into Bethany's haircut? I did not notice that. Well, to be fair into Bethany's haircut.
I did not notice that.
Well, to be fair, Bethany reinvented herself into Luan's haircut.
Exactly. Yeah, my hair.
Yeah, Bethany stole it from Luan.
Then Tinsley stole it from, I mean, Carol stole it from Bethany.
It's like a disease that just keeps hopping from, you know, victim to victim.
Well, I love.
So when Carol says, you know, maybe cut your hair, get some blue lights
whatever, and it's like no like that's ridiculous. I can't do that like this is my hair
like and she's like she starts telling us I love my curls. Like I just can't I can't
see my life without my curls and I'm like girl you don't even have a curl in your hair.
Your hair is completely straight right now. You're halfway there.
And every time Carol would say something in the scene,
the music went, ding. Did you notice that? It's like maybe you should reinvent yourself.
It's like around the horn on ESPN. Every time you make a good point, you get the little bell.
Yeah, it's like a diner. It's so weird. Order up. Yeah. I I mean someone's hamburger is getting very cold.
New eyelashes.
Ding!
It smells like a fucking slaughtering eyelashes.
And Mel's Diner.
Kiss my grids, my heel.
It was just a producer chiming in with their subtle suggestion.
Like, please, anything for a story, Tinsley,
get eyelashes, anything.
Go just like cut an inch off your hair. We need content from you. Tinsley, get eyelashes, anything. Go just like, cut an inch off your hair.
We need content from you.
Tinsley, this is your producer.
Have you ever thought about a crimping iron?
No, oh my God, post-traumatic stress, oh my God.
Tinsley, have you thought about maybe dipping your toes
into wigs?
You could do wigs, too.
Oh no.
How about just like, kind of upward pointing,
arrow shaped eyebrows.
Just have those, just have those catch on.
We still have Bethany's bright red bob,
if you wanna use that.
No, no, okay.
Was it a bob?
Maybe it was long, I don't remember.
So over at Sonya's, Sonya flips open her suitcase
and she's like, I'm taking these to Bordeaux. Oh, sorry. Yeah, Sonya flips open her suitcase and she's like, I'm taking these to Bordell.
Oh, sorry.
Yes, Sonya.
She's like, you know, that bookstore that's down the corner, like, no, that's Bordell,
and it's closed.
Oh, okay.
Well, I guess today's job is done.
So stupid.
Also, she has, um, Roos the Dog, who's very cute. I'm only mentioning that because he's just looking at her like how did I get stuck here?
And we also always call Rouge Mielu and so does Ramona
Remember Ramona a few episodes because I know she has she has Mielu doesn't she?
I don't know why me Lou ever since she got in trouble for not saying hello to Bethany's dog
That was so funny when she went to carols
And she's like hello, baby. Hello, baby. Hey, baby. Hi, let's face it. I said hi to babies
Hi, look at these cool young dogs. They're gonna be my best new friends with graded voice on how to do with people like Bethany, okay?
So Frenchie is there because he has moved in now and he isn't a bright red sweater with like leather elbow pads
I don't know why that might be laugh so hard, but he is
And he's like
The people are the people are the people are the people I still think this guy is totally
Little mermaiding it. I don't think he's really French at all. He's just some weird poor person from downtown. Yeah, yeah. I don't understand any of this. I don't understand this weird Sonya storyline. It's not terribly compelling to me, especially because I don't really believe they're in a relationship. I believe he is someone that she met who is like staying in the weird Luan apartment
on the fourth floor with the tube TV
and the little rug, you know?
Yeah, he was like a guy she saw in a park
literally riding around on his bike
with like some bread under his arm
that he just stole from some poor person
at the farmer's market, you know?
Yeah, I mean, I feel like his backstory
is that he spent the past five years
standing very still in Times Square painted silver.
And then so he was like,
what would happen if we took that paint off?
Oh, you're French.
Okay, come on, move in with me.
He's actually been in her downtown house for three years,
but no one realized he was there
because he's just very still.
I mean, the guy loves me.
That's the robot for me.
I just don't know what to do.
So French is like,
oh, you know, I have to week, to week work, then I have don't know what to do. So, Frenchie's like, oh, you know, I have to week,
do week work, then I have to go buried, the week.
But you know, when I'm on your back, the week in a row,
and she's like, you know, the only thing, Frenchie,
is I just don't like when you come into the bathroom
when I'm pooping, or, you know, doing my underwear laundry
in the bed day, I just,
but I'm fishing out my blackberry.
I just don't like it.
There's something about it.
And he's like,
oh, my parents always say,
close the door when you go to the pool.
You know close the door.
She's like...
And she's like, it's my ensuite.
I shouldn't have to.
Here's how to say, excuse me, Sonia,
may I come in?
And then I'll let you know. She's like, oh, I shouldn't have to. Here's have to say, excuse me Sonia, may I come in? And then I'll let you know.
She's like, oh, I should take Rocky walking
and say ding dong.
I think I may have made a mistake.
Dong dong dong.
It's like, well, wait a minute, Francie,
I was verging into racism now.
Okay.
Remember your, remember your Samuel French accent on tape.
Accent, please sir.
She's like, well, when Tinsley leaves,
you can just take her sitter. And he's like, oh, the well when Tinsley leaves you can just take her
shitter. He's like oh the problem is Tinsley nor leave it ill. And that's when you change
it. And she's like well she just keeps talking about leaving and I'm leaving and this and that
leave by packing leaving and it just you know it really hurts my feelings. Yeah. Okay. I was only
having attention to the scene. I'm not gonna lie because I just didn't understand the point point of it
So basically the issue is that he's walking on her with while she's peeing and
She's like getting sick of him, but she's still kind of likes having around because I think she likes to talk about how there's this French guy
That she just can't get rid of and sometimes they have sex, but sometimes they just clear out the brown eyes together and it's just a wonderful time with friendship.
Well, the point of it, the whole scene, was that she was telling him about the, he had heard
about the older guy, Missou Gouf Latou, or whatever, that these are, Rocco and, and
Rocco, and I don't see you.
And I don't see you.
And I don't see you.
And I don't see you.
And I don't see you.
And I don't see you. And I don't see you. And I the party and you know, everybody was joking about you
And he's like, oh, it is none of their business. They have no God in to take care of all those bitches
And he's like when people talking Northean my brain, okay?
I only hear Zings and she's like, what did you hear, Frenchy?
And he's like, oh, my friend text me, you go out with this man Mr. Govassal.
And she's like, oh no, will you ask me if I kissed him?
And I said no, because I haven't kissed him.
And he's like, well, you know, a little snack is no kiss.
So, that's basically it.
Did you tell him story about your napkins?
Well, I mean, I may have told him,
no, Sonia, that was our private story. I
Want to do in health is I
Was supposed to be the only one who know the story behind the oversized napkins the important thing is
Where Rouge going to get Mally and
Ruse is licking his balls and she goes oh my god. R Bruce is always checking his balls. You used to do that. Now you
know they're there.
Weird. Oh, by the way, have you seen Tinsley talking to Connor?
Okay, good. Great. Thanks.
Okay, I'm going to give you just, you know, a hypothetical. If
the doorbell ring, would you ask Connor to see if it was your UPS person
or would you go downstairs and make sure you be Connor to the door just in case it was?
Okay, Frenchy, quick, pop quiz. Tensy's hats arrived from down the street. Do you A, bring
them up to her, B, kick them out, or C, just wear them everywhere. I got lost in my own pop quiz.
Because then I started to answer for myself. I was like, I don't know what I would do.
Well, let's drop the pop quiz and go to the pop eyes.
Ramona.
Yeah.
Oh my god.
Ather, here we are on FaceTime. You know, like you call me on a FaceTime and sometimes I call you on FaceTime, but like now we're both on FaceTime with the same products.
Crazy.
Whoa, I just realized something.
FaceTime, it's like you're looking face to face at the same time.
So it really is FaceTime, but why don't they call it Face to FaceTime?
Because that's what you're really doing, okay?
I'm sorry, it doesn't make sense, Mr. Steve Jobs, it doesn't at all.
It's scary. Now, you're looking at my. Steve Jobs. It doesn't at all. Sorry.
Now, you're looking at my brand new kitchen.
Why don't they call it kitchen time?
Well, they call it counter time.
I did it all myself.
My mother always said, you don't want to rely on a man
to decorate your apartment for you.
Okay, so I did it all myself.
I saw a pillow at Ross that's yellow and it says,
you are my sunshine.
And I was going to buy it for you, but they spelled
sunshine wrong.
What's supposed to be sunshine.
I mean, what the hell is like a sunshine pillow
are going to do?
It has to say like, you want my sunshine.
I'm showing.
I you are my sunshine.
My only sunshine.
When you're not.
When near me, I get an edge here of kitchen, okay?
So thanks for not being near me, Bethany.
Okay.
Now I have an edge of kitchen.
It reminds me of sunshine.
So I don't need you anymore.
I don't need my sunshine because I have a kitchen that reminds me of sunshine.
Sorry, I'm sorry, but it's true.
I'm seeing this telling girl, you know, I have, I'm having all my friends over because they
want to see my new edgy kitchen, except for Bethany.
I invited her, but you know, it's crazy.
I haven't ever been in this place with anyone before, except all my former friends, like
Jill Zarin, okay?
Oh no, she's still friends with Jill that's what's
cracking me up this whole thing is Jill's argument because all of those things
that she spit out with spit out to Bethany were all the things that Jill's been
saying for years which is you fucked your way to the top you did this and that
those are all Jill arguments so obviously she's talking to Jill Jill in on
the show don't don't be arguing Jill's points when Jill's not even on the
show. Ramona. Oh my god. I do miss the gossip though. I do miss the gossip. I gotta admit it. I
miss it. I miss the gossip. You know what? That's so annoying. So annoying.
Yeah. So Ramona is very proud. She's like, I did it all me, me, myself, and Oi. Did it all myself, hi.
There were also some micrometers in here,
but they would just hear because they were falling in love
with me, you know, because I'm single and ready to mingle.
Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
Also, now that I brought up Jill
and I don't want to do it again later,
Ramona was on watch what happens live, and I couldn't watch it because Andy was like,
Hey, everybody.
Next we're going to see Ramona's boobs are they bigger than dumb bows or whatever.
I was like, I can't, but I watched a little bit her face is different again.
And it's starting to look like Jill's face.
Have you noticed?
Did you see it?
Uh, I didn't notice, but I actually think Jill's face is looking pretty good these days.
Jill looks very good these days. yes, I have to say.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Face, hair, and her body is banging.
There's a billboard, there's a billboard for watch what happens in Los Fuelis right now,
and it's just Andy Cohen, like, relaxing on top of a cab, and it goes watch what happens.
He goes there.
I'm like, where does he go?
Is it the crotch to the boobs?
It's not, he's like,
he, it's not like he goes someplace pretty least scandal. He just asks really stupid
and appropriate questions. Oh, we ambie. Uh, so next up, uh, Tinsley is with my favorite mother
of the show Dale. Dale with Chris the gay. Yeah, Chris the gay and Dale. This is just a really
great combination here. I'm loving all of it. He's like guys before we go in. I just want to say this is 11th and bleaker, which is the prime of the prime.
Prima prime of the primo crop prime. Okay.
Better than endale just.
You can see Dale's just like putting on a little surgical gloves, so she doesn't have to touch anything.
Hold on one second, Mr. Homo, I need to put on my plastic gloves so I don't get any of
his lower east side germs on my hands.
I sprayed my hair into a helmet Mr. Gay.
In just in case any flying bottles come at us.
We will think we're the with a Pope, bro.
I just auctioned off my stupid elephant clock
for $32,000 some of the other bottle time.
And I'm ready to look at this poppers and home.
Oh, I want to be able to figure out where to put the fan.
Stupid bitch tried to try to pay me in some sort some amount of a dog caftain.
I don't know.
Anyway, we're using the pros to give tensile here apartments, that way she can shut out
that Sonya if she's not getting any traits. Now, we need to hurry up because daddy's at home waiting for lunch.
And by daddy, I'm in my cockatiel.
I mean, your daddy who's in a box at home.
I know my third cheese.
Okay.
Yeah, I forgot about you.
I was like, I don't remember. I don't know
where the daddy joke is, but I'm just going to make comment. Yeah. Daddy got a bunch of
riffs. I hope his name is Richard. Dicking the rap. Okay. So Tinsley, they don't have so
many ashes storylines on this show. You know, so they go look at the first department,
which is in the West Village. And Tinsley us I do business development. So you know, I have a job and you know family money
So I can afford it because it's 1500 square feet for nine grand
Well, away plain sin city is not the same as doing business development
I turned I developed like a lot of residential areas and commercial zones and like we have a stadium there was a giant monster who came in and destroyed downtown but I fixed that so you know.
And her mom goes to the window and says wow it looks like a little village out there. I'm like, what are they talking about? He's like, it's the West's Bellage.
I'm quite...
I'm just nailing things what they are.
I'm like, things much easier, doesn't it?
Oh my God, I love Dale.
I love her helmet hair, but I see it in the best possible way.
It's like puffs out a little bit, that just sort of says,
I am wealthy. And please only talk to me if you're in the proposition possible way. It's like puffs out a little bit, that just sort of says, I am wealthy.
And please only talk to me if you're
in the proposition in life, thank you.
Yes.
And it also says, who needs an identity
when they still make Aquanette?
Because that is some Aquanette adhair, girl.
I mean, there's some things you can modernize
and make organic.
Aquanette is not one of those things, OK?
So look around the apartment has a sort of a small master in tiny closet and
not cute. I mean not cute for
9,000 ban. I mean how does how do people live there insane? I
Literally don't know. I literally do not know. They're so, yeah, I'm I'm just gonna say, no, that's triple the prices.
It would be here in LA, literally triple
a couple of human apartment prices.
Yeah, it's nuts.
So they go to, they go to the kitchen.
So, it doesn't need this room.
Which is such a mom thing to say, but also hilarious.
So then, and also I love Dale's fur.
It's like a bee fur.
It's like black and yellow.
It's the day I'm me as the ultimate Broadway. Yes, it is in Central Park. So tiny closet and she's like is that is that for the handbags?
Are you what are you doing to your mouth? Are you by?
That is real
Because she only can talk out of half her mouth and I'm not even making fun of the fact that she's had so much surgery
I admire the fact that she's that dedicated because when she started having facial surgery
It wasn't very perfected, you know, and now our muscles are all pulled every which way and so when she gets a bow talks
It's hitting some other muscle that won't let her mouth move properly. I
I actually don't think her face looks pretty like surgery
tops. I mean, I'm sure there's probably something. But to me, I mean, we've seen
much worse examples. Well, I think I put Mama Elsa on Bravo so that everybody else
would look better. Honestly, they were, they were just changing the bar. But I think
she looks very pretty. You only really notice it when she's talking.
Yeah, well, she is very pretty.
Well, she's Dale, of course, she's Dale is an Indian.
Yeah, yeah, Dale's amazing.
So over at Carol's.
Carol's.
I want my carol voice is not working today.
I need like before I do a carol impersonation, I need to like to take a swig of water or coffee and I'm out of my waters all the way in the other room. So it's
just going to be a weird carol voice coming from me today.
I just punched myself on the threat and it all seems to work out great. By the way,
did you notice macro note that it felt like in every scene this episode, there was always
one person whose microphone was messed up?
No. I thought carols was messed up in the scene. Later on, Harry whose microphone was messed up. Um, no.
I thought Carol's was messed up in the scene.
Later on Harry Dubens was messed up.
Someone else's was messed up in another scene where they were like very tinny and they
had to put the gain up, like maybe with Dale's microphone.
I was like, someone is messing up with the audio there.
Well, there's something weird with the audio on the show because every time I watch it in
the beginning, I realize that, I mean, yeah, but we're like in our kitchens. We're not on a national TV. So I noticed that in the
beginning, they all sound like they're calling in from their iPhones. You know, like, there's
nothing great about my gardens. And you hear like the garbage disposal in the back.
But like, he's audio effects to mute it. Yeah. Anyway, I'm sorry.
I derailed you.
Where are Carol's place?
Yes.
So I noticed that in her thing where she's posing, what she's
like, I'm Carol!
When they're like, do do do do do do do.
Carol's in an American Horror Story plethora outfit.
Did you notice that?
She's like the guy who hangs from the ceiling
and tries to fuck everybody to death
in American horror story.
I haven't seen American horror story,
but it sounds appropriate.
Except this one's like,
I'm keeping your boot ahead.
Boah!
Boah!
Well, I was a huge fan of Carol's,
her gay, that interred decorator, because he had like some,
you know, he is like older and wiser and has, I feel like, perfected his gay sass, you
know. So like when she was talking about, you know, the reason why he's there is because
she has to repulsor the famous sofa that was gifted to her or she inherited from League
Radswell, her mother-in-law.
And it's a 60-year-old sofa.
It's tattered and torn, like Natalie and Brillia's heart.
And basically, she has to figure out what sort of fabric to use, but she has all those
cats, too.
And so she's like, well, somebody told me that if I wrapped him foil around the feet of
the furniture, they'll stop scratching.
And the gate goes, oh, that's gonna look real nice.
And the cat is hanging off the curtains again, which is hilarious.
So Adam comes over to pick up stuff and they start having like their, I mean, how much could
you fight with Adam? She's like, yeah, I don't like that this is here. And he's like, what a bit of a bat babe.
I'm a little bit, do you even talk?
So he's like, I think you should take this flower.
And he's like, Dave, that's been your flower since before
I even moved in here.
You find it.
Oh, you know, and you see the designer's just staring at both of them.
And in his head head he's like,
it's like chasing between the Florida Lee and the porcelain chef.
Honestly, just don't even both out.
Yeah, one point.
He's like, I want this boot ahead and he's like, sorry, but that's the center piece of my house.
Oh, good.
Well, I love is at one point I'm goes, well, I'll let you keep the boot ahead if I got to take these lamps and the gauges goes, no.
Like, who is this particular straight man right now? No, of course not.
Like, he was so incredulous. He wasn't even like, no, he was just like, what the fuck is this person saying?
Yeah, you're lucky we haven't changed the lux yet and don't think I'll make that mistake twice
So now tensley and her mom again now they're looking at another 1500 square foot apartment for $9,000
Which is nice much
Huge huge skylight. It's got this cool. It's got this cool one of skyline. I mean, it's beautiful. Yeah, and the closet has one of those things where
You can you can pull down a thing and you can hang your your dresses and then you push it back up
So it saves space and they all goes well, they think of everything don't they?
These villages that now mom we're in a different place now
It's so adorable what these people have to do for their non-walking closets, isn't it?
Is this what my people have to do on my house? I mean, I don't know what it goes on to my closet.
So the game's like, well, I think this one's more yellow. I mean, it's like beautiful. There's like a bar you pull down. You know, prime of prime, primal prime.
And she's like, no, actually it's more my mom and I don't know
Like now is my mom and I wanted it to be me, but do I need this?
Why need it to be this nice? Can I live in a tiny place? I don't even know. I'm
Brought to cry. Literally, I'm about to cry. I'm about to start crying like we because I don't really do that
Nobody understands Paul Beach, you know what I mean?
I did tissue. I did tissue.
I'm having nightmares of tissues.
Now may I just say if you're in a quandary, go to a hotel?
Yeah, Dale just doesn't even want to deal with anymore. She's like, but we just moved all your stuff out of palm
West Palm have the game. It's like yeah, but that was for a reason. Oh my god
Don't forget that god literally traumatizing. Nobody got that. It's a lot. It's for a reason. Oh my god, don't forget that. Oh god, literally traumatizing.
Nobody got to that.
It's a lot.
It's a lot.
It's just a lot.
It's just a lot.
It's a lot.
Like, yes, it's literally a lot of lands, okay?
Or a plot of land.
Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up
on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court.
I'm Matt Bellasife.
And I'm Sydney Battle.
And we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast,
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Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build up, why it happened,
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It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud.
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Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood.
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And just please just take it.
Here's a thing with Tinsley, okay?
I get it moving to a different neighborhood is weird.
Like for instance, I live in Hollywood.
I've always lived in Hollywood or West Hollywood, but I've always been basically in the same section of town here in LA for 15 years. And the idea of like,
I would never move to the West side. I would never move to Santa Monica because it's just,
I don't know it over there. And I don't want it. This is, I like this neighborhood. This is where I
want to stay. I get that. However, if I moved away for like a year or two and then moved back to LA,
I probably would be like, you know what?
I'm back to city. Why don't I try someplace new? So I don't think it's that crazy to like, I don't understand this attachment she has to the upper side. It just seems so.
I feel like part of the problem might be that she's hearing $9,000 for every
place. And she's like, what the fuck? That's like 100 something grand.
I'm going to have to come up with every year. I mean,
well, I mean, the hell and probably her mom is like, well, I like these
apartments, but you know, all the villages, they may rise up. So we should probably go
the upper side, translation, I'll only pay for your upper side apartment.
Yes, that's true. If I have to pay for a cab every day, it's going to make
things more expensive. And I won't pay rent down to it.
Tinsley, let's be honest, these people are not going to be able to pay for a cab every day. It's gonna make things more expensive. And I won't pay rent down town. Tinsley, let's be honest.
These people are not gonna be able to give you a good blowout.
You know what I'm saying?
No one wants to live in the same neighborhood
as the breadstick and the candlestick maker.
Yeah.
I mean, Tavanon Jane, how does a lady have a Tavanon her?
I mean, look what they did to that poor girl Jane.
Built a tavern right on her. Right on her stomach, you don't need that.
They don't respect women and I'm not going to have my daughter living in such a
hellhole. I mean what's the deal with Westforth going diagonal and sort of North?
It doesn't make sense. Things don't make sense over here, Tinsley.
So Tinsley freaks out. So next up is Frederick and Bethany. Hello, is anybody home? Are you naked?
Oh, we do the sizzle reel for the pilot now. We do sizzle reel for our spin off show. Okay, okay, let's do that. Okay. I'm ready.
I'm ready to go. Let's do what he wants. A clutter clutter, huh?
A clutter, okay. It's made so much different and here so much better.
Yeah. Well, you know, I'd be cluttered, you know, like, I mean, I guess people don't want to ever,
you know, like use an apartment that has like things in it like life and personality.
So like I just took out a chair and an element and now it's like open and free.
Okay. Like seriously, like, like, just, just tell me now.
All right. You can come in now. The ghostbusters just left like seriously.
Like seriously, like there's invisible slime everywhere. Like honestly, like, you know what
I want, I want, I want time to come in and just like sit on a chair and ask for a drink
and I'll be like, see the bars, the bars got because slime everyone's drink. Last time
like kill me now. We're gonna have to pay $20,000 to get the marshmallow off the walls,
but otherwise like we're good. Yeah, we're good. Good. Yeah. So she's got this bar in the
corner that makes everything look cluttered and he's like, oh, you need to get the bar
gone. It looks fratty. She's like, seriously, you need to get the bag on. It looks fratty.
She's like, seriously, you're like the troxucker?
Like, I hate you.
Like, seriously, die.
How about that?
How about you, die?
Like, let me just say, die.
Just like, have a, like literally,
it's not gonna move.
You know what, it's gonna tear up the floor,
it's gonna scratch everything.
Like, it's gonna be a whole thing.
Like, I don't want to be a whole thing.
Like, honestly, like, kill me now.
Like, you know what I want to do?
I want to get behind the bar,
and take a martini glass, smash it,
and then just let my throat in,
just like, die behind the bar. And like, here lies Beth and the Beth and the Franklin, like, dead behind the bar. Like, honestly, I can't wait now. You know what I want to do? I want to get behind the bar and take a martini glass smash it And then it's the my throat and just like die behind the bar and like like here lies Bethany Bethany Frankl like dead behind the bar
Like I'll say it can all pretend it for smell again. I shall be do you fuck fucking do so. That's pretty much
I mean that's pretty much a mix. I think he's right. I think he's right about that bar
I don't think it looks it we know the one thing though is that
So this bar costs 40,000 dollars, you know, it's like I thought it was like a
So this bar costs $40,000. You know, it's like, I thought it was like a,
you know, like a $1,000, $2,000 bar,
but she's been $40,000 on that bar,
and it does not even look good.
There's like a drapery cram behind it.
But on top of that, you know, it's gonna be a whole thing,
and so then she calls up once a matter.
And it's like, all right, so I need you guys to move the bar
out of here, okay?
All right, thanks, bye.
I'm like, that's, what?
That's crazy. You can't call up your system.
Be like, move my bar out of my apartment.
Because you know, it's going to be like, she was calling someone called BB endeavors.
And I was like, that's so Frederick company, such a Frederick company.
I bet you're calling me a madder.
It's our BB, Ron Rear, bettany.
They're like, ah, hi, Ron Rear, may I help you?
I was like, wow, I was like, that's, I mean, that's, that's seemed like really above the
assistant's pay grade to make them haul out a bar.
Much, makes much more sense.
Okay, great.
So good.
So let's see here.
Carol is next.
She's talking to, to rent on the phone about going to Washington for the vagina hat march.
And because it's right after Trump got in or whatever.
And Tyrenda's like, I have a Dua la, and I'm a woman.
He makes sense.
You know what?
Is he wanna make a sandwich, we make a sandwich.
We're going to march for the sandwiches.
And you know what? We're going to be one big lady sandwich.
It's like 100,000 layers of sandwich and dough and chocolate.
Come on. That's great.
If you want to make a sandwich, I'm going to make a sandwich.
I'm going to bring my chaos gray.
I'll be a big bar for the gray.
I didn't like. sandwich. I'm going to bring my gay ass gray. I would be a big barge of the gray
on and like, ugh. Guys, before we go any further in this episode, there's something
really, really quick and easy we want you to do. We rely on advertising to keep
this show free. And if you could do us a favor, could you go to podcastlistener.com
slash crappins and answer a few short questions. It'd be super helpful to us
Yeah, again, that's podcast listener.com slash crappens podcast listener.com slash crappens just take that little survey
Okay, it takes like a minute and you know who doesn't love a good survey
Thanks, and now we get some Hoboken music
But boom
And now we get some Hoboken music, but boom, da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da For some reason I thought it was five in the morning because I thought it was the next morning because the scene was before I was Carol talking about going down to DC and then
like they say Hoboken, they show a bus.
I'm like, oh, they have to get to Hoboken to shake the bus.
Do you see that?
My mind was like that.
And then Sonia shows up.
I was like, what's Sonia doing in Hoboken at five in the morning?
I was so confused.
I would love if Durin was like, we're going to the women's match just to get a piece
of pizza and Hoboken.
Hoboken. Hoboken. Hob pizza and Hoboken. Hoboken.
What do I always say? Hoboken. Hoboken. Hoboken. Hey, you know what? You say how you want to say it,
okay? Caduce to Ramona's like who does everyone? This is the world you're living in. You know,
yeah, so Brett is back and this turns into a date with Rocco.
back and this turns into a date with Rocco. The most exciting date of all. Oh my God. When Rocco sees Sonia and he's like,
Made me pine for the good old days of Vito and in little Italy. He throws up his hands.
Like, I'm trying to think about life is beautiful.
What is that movie?
Birdobinini.
Yes.
Birdobinini winning an Oscar.
He's like, Rocco is climbing over chairs.
He's like, SONYA!
SONYA!
It's like the poster for Gypsy with time daily just like her arms up in the air. It says Gypsy above it.
Like, BLEEEEEN OF SOME!
Geez, Morocco.
Somewhere between Don't Cry from your Argentina and Platoon.
And arms are up.
Yes. So he's like, oh Frank Sinatra, you should live here.
He brought people bread here every day.
So why was gluten not so harmful back then?
He was always thin, Frank.
Well, he did a lot of walking.
Guys, something in the farming. It's Monsanto.
So, so I like, oh, I like, I like how Rocco says to Sonia, he's like,
oh, yes, I shut down the restaurant for you, Sonia. I'm like, oh, yes, that's the reason why it's
him because you shut it down. Mm-hmm. Yes, okay. Not because you're announcing brightest back in 2017.
I mean, Caroline Monsok can only eat so much pizza for Christ's sake.
Let's be honest, it's probably the former space of Little Big Town.
I would have, even with that restaurant, was the man's egg heads opened up.
I think Little Big Town's a band.
It was like, big little restaurant.
Now serving mozzarella sticks with Captain Crunch batter.
Little town town.
That was the little prime of Primo. mozzarella sticks with Captain Crunch batter. Little town town.
That was the little prime of Primo.
So he's like, oh, you know, Rocco,
he just makes me light up.
Look at these sauces.
Picante, Picante, and Picante.
I guess world traveler.
You know you're in an Italian restaurant, right?
She's acting like she's at the Baja for a salt bar. Oh, duck sauce. Okay, duck sauce mustered more duck sauce. No, no, still wrong.
So he she this scene is her wanting to tell him about Frenchy because Frenchy knows about
him. So I mean, the difference between these two guys is hilarious. It's probably like the same age difference,
you know, in opposite ways. Yeah, it's because he, because Rocco is what, like, 90 years old. Yeah,
probably. You know, yeah, like it's hard to tell because he's got that like,
dyed hair, comb over things, you can't really tell. Yeah, probably, you know, yeah, like it's hard to tell because he's got that like dyed hair comb over things you can't really tell. Yeah, so they're talking about, you know,
they're talking about Tom and Sonia starts talking about how she really likes loyalty and
Edgar's talking about how we used to cheat because I like to cheat anymore. And this is all hilarious
because the whole reason why she's meeting up with with Rocco is because she feels she has to tell
Rocco about Frenchie because Frenchie knows about Rocco is because she feels she has to tell Rocco about friendship because friendship
She knows about Rocco, which she actually does not have to do, but I think she needed to have a scene to do something
Well, I have to point out that she was saying, you know, Luan got married and I find out what, you know, she said something like I booked that trip when I was with Tom and then she got married to Tom
I mean, married, I mean, I like loyalty. I mean, loyalty is marriage.
Well, you know, marriage is a noble thing to do. She's like, well, I just wish there was loyalty.
Well, I also don't like, I also have a hard time believing that she booked her trip to Foucaix
in like from 2016 to 2017 in fall of 2015.
You never know that girl's probably on price line every day looking two years ahead.
Yeah, that girl likes a bargain that one.
Well, the truth is she probably did not even go to Fouquet.
She probably just went to a tire restaurant down the street.
Like, here I am on vacation Fouquet.
This is time.
Wow, this is called Empacante.
Wow, I'll have the Be I can't say that. I'm not sure if I can't say that. I'm not sure if I can't say that.
I'm not sure if I can't say that.
I'm not sure if I can't say that.
I'm not sure if I can't say that.
I'm not sure if I can't say that.
I'm not sure if I can't say that.
I'm not sure if I can't say that.
I'm not sure if I can't say that.
I'm not sure if I can't say that.
I'm not sure if I can't say that.
I'm not sure if I can't say that. I'm not last, I don't want to cheat again. And she goes, yeah, but when you're R.A.
I mean, I don't know.
I, um, well, you know, the Conte end.
He's like, wait a minute.
And she goes, well, what happened, Rocco?
A complete stranger from Paris comes in, and I met him,
and then I took him home after a party.
Oh, really?
Yes, and then I slept with him. And, you know, then I took him home after a party. Oh really? Yes, and then I slept with him and, you know,
then we went to dinner and a museum.
And he's like, um, okay.
She's like, and I just, I can't get rid of him.
It's like, it's hilarious.
And he just is here and we just keep fucking by accident.
And like, I'm like, gosh, and are you termed yet?
This is the normal stuff I say that people usually laugh at.
At a cocktail party, you're not laughing.
No, okay.
So he is, I mean, like, I barely know him.
I mean, just for like only like six months,
he's been my room.
And like, I mean, it's weird.
You still want me to talk?
Okay, okay, all right, I can do this.
So yeah, it's weird.
I can't get rid of him.
And I'm thinking you both sort of, we're fucking Picanque. You know, I thought he would just go back to Paris, but now he's with me again.
I mean, but in Paris, but he's coming back probably with me again.
And I just look, I just don't want you to think there are other guys like that.
Okay.
There are no other guys like you and there's no other guys like that.
You know shit happens.
And Rocco's like, uh, wow, do I look at the
big napkin?
Oh, so he's trying to deal with this because he's just trying to play it off like it's no big
deal. And he's like, I could be serving pizza by the slice right now to teenagers. So did I miss this?
Frank's not for that bread here.
He's like, you realize that I am losing $30,000 tonight because of you.
So they have diamonds on my pizza.
So he decides, you know, he's still got a Sonya.
So whether or not she's fucking someone else,
he's like, he, you just see it in his eyes
that he's like, well, okay.
It's important to me that people really get
to know each other as friends.
Because you don't jump to the sex part.
Friend is more easy.
Say, a friend is more difficult.
Sex is easy.
Mikey, all right.
He basically just friends on her.
He's like, you know, I don't know what time it is here because I travel the world so much.
It's so hard to know the time zones.
Are we perhaps in the friend zone?
Oh, burn zone.
Yeah, burn like the pizza oven.
You burn in the pizza oven now.
Friend zone.
Auto zone, son, you know, we are in the pizza oven now. Friend zone auto zone.
Sonia we out in the auto zone.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Riley.
Oh, no, wait, sorry.
She's like, well, that's good because I'm taking my time.
I'm like, you just told him that you're you moved.
You'd let a guy move in with you that you fucked one time after a party.
Sonia and she goes, well,
French is just infatuation because Rocco,
Rocco's the long haul. I'm like, Rocco's got about seven years left. Okay.
Yeah. Sonya goes, you know, the fear's the thing. You know, I, you know, if I'm not married,
you know, I'm not married until I am married. And I'm not committed until I'm married.
I'm like, you're not committed until you're married. That's pretty, that's a little crazy there.
Sonia, that's so sonia.
So he goes, oh, let's talk about us.
Remember the last time we kissed all the lips,
she's like, what?
Oh, I just said in a previous scene
that I hadn't even kissed you so...
Was that before after you invited me to Hoboken?
Because I'm not sure I'd kiss you now that you'd hold me to New Jersey.
Was that pre-Hoboken Rocco?
Or current Picante, Picante, Picante Rocco.
And he's like, oh, that pic.
It was so cute.
Because, oh, you were right, I did kiss you,
because it was just a pic, you know.
She's like, oh, good.
Is this the way you're saying blowjob?
He's like, no, it was a pic on, on,
a label, whatever.
Do the name.
Hey, have you ever seen that movie, the,
the Hoboken Chicken Emergency?
That's a place here for real.
No, Sonya, that was not a real story.
No chicken emergency in Hoboken.
Oh, thank God.
Oh, chicken.
So, yeah, so she's happy because he's basically said,
look, we can still keep dating, you don't have to fuck me,
and I don't even understand what's happening
with this French person, you know,
hope you get rent, whatever.
Yeah. So next they go to the parade and all I wrote down at the march in Washington DC
is we need a leader, not a creepy tweeter.
Yeah. I love her. We need a sandwich. So make a sandwich, Mr. President. We burn our
bras, but they've all got water in them.
Victoria is secret as changed protesting forever.
They put water in their bras now.
Water. Yeah, they change them every year. They have a water brought or a gel bra.
Now they have like a bandaid bra that just kind of tapes onto your sides.
I mean, they're always changing, but the point is it's just not safe to burn
your bras anymore, ladies.
Yeah, meringue. So yeah, but the point is it's just not safe to burn your bras anymore ladies. Yeah, more right.
So, yeah, women's March, women's March.
It was nice.
Hannah is like, I'm never been more proud to be a woman.
So that's nice.
And then the true, the true height of, of how far women have come is cutting to Bethany,
the backseat of her, you know, SUV, barking at Kevin.
All right.
Take me, yeah, pretty sad.
You know what, you know what?
It's like, up to you side.
It's just like, which juice?
That's what it's up there. You know what that, that it is rich shoes and like and like preppy people like smart
Preppy people. It's like it's like wall wall street people like which rich people are I've touched my great one Bethany
Great steering commenter in the upper east side. No one's ever said those things before like rich people or it's like a
Bar mitzvah or like it's a Batman's fire or like it's like old people with like geometric grunts or like seriously
That's a pretty side. He's like he's like get out of my car please
get paid enough for this bitch get out
and then see in Anisha getting their nails done Ramona and Sonia or Ramona is
getting ready for her party in her kitchen and she goes look, and she goes, look how the animals are now,
because, oh no, Sonya says this.
She goes to Ramona.
Look how, look how the animals are now,
because Tinsley gives some food.
Tinsley ruins everything.
And then Luanne, meanwhile, is making a charcuterie plate.
It's like nothing.
She's just making a charcuterie plate and Tom comes,
he's like, hi, and she's like, a shark. We played in Tom come to these like hi and she's like
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
I've made us food
Can you believe it? I got the wood board
Would you believe it? Shagoodery. It's French here have a piece of slummy. Oh
Would you believe it? It's Greek olive. Oh
Some fork Which believe it to Greek olive haha haha So far haha run
She just described
She just describes words about the charcuterie so over Ramona Ramona is getting
She's like oh my god setting up for my party has to be perfect. You know everything has to be great and her gave
Hank is over there.
And he's a caterer. And he's he's such a caterer. He's like, Oh, everything's going to be great.
Ramona. Just great. So we got salmon miz and we put the salmon miz into like a cucumber.
I don't know. I just started to make him Southern now. But like,
I've been doing so much Southern charm,
everything's Southern now.
Well, I was making him, what's the matter?
So I guess,
you look wonderful.
Yeah, either way,
and it's like, he's just very excited about the Sam and
Bruce and the cucumber, whatever it was.
Ramona, Ramona, the most,
the most buzzed about the thing about this is that
Ramona has her hair in a high pony
And it's all pulled back and all super tight believe it or not
I did not hate it. I didn't think it was terrible
But everyone else seems to think it's the worst thing that ever seen well Ramona is one of those people with eyes
that
seer
Seer into you like she could open her own
Seer into you. Like she could open her own Benihana and just seer the meat with her eyes.
Like she's just got those eyes.
So without the hair to kind of, you know, I don't know,
absorb the shock of her head twitch or whatever.
Yeah.
It's just there's something weird about the look, but also just because she's like,
well, now I'm edgy.
Okay.
So I just made the edgy hair and an edgy outfit.
And my counters even have edges, you know, the edgy.
Everything, edgy, it's all about edgy.
So, uh, Carol, my favorite band is you two,
because there's a member of that band called the edgy,
isn't that crazy?
But there's no black band that chases him around.
I don't understand it.
The only song I'm gonna be playing through this entire party is Ed Tamma.
Whoa, you know what this word reminds me of?
It reminds me of that Tom Cruise movie where he goes and relives the same day over it over
it over and over again. It's called Ed's of Tomorrow.
And then when I watch it, I imagine what would happen to me if I had to live with Mario
day after day after day over and over and over again.
And Jelene Parsons says, whoa, stop that. You're not Tom Cruise. You're not a movie star.
You're not even a mummy. So stop saying those things. And now I can't stop thinking about Tom Cruise. I'm sorry.
Now, there's no man in this house anymore. There's no more PlayStation. The only game here loud is Sonic the Edgehog. Okay. I love Lady Gaga's song, The Edge of Loving You.
Like, we're not what it's called.
Oh, I'm sorry.
We were at the Edge, the Edge, the Edge, the Edge, the Edge, the Edge, the Edge, the Edge,
the Edge.
Love that song.
Oh, so Carol's the first one to come.
And now she's in some kind of weird
a zip up jumper thing. She's like, wow, it's like a new place. It's edgy, right? Hey,
Carol, come over here. Look at this light fixture. Okay. Have you seen it? Are you
single right now? What do you think of it? It's new. It's a fixture. It's a light. Look,
you flick it on the light comes on. What do you think?
She's like, wow, or a gummy.
I think of Ramona is more of a traditional type and that ponytail Barbara Eden was 24.
I'm like, so is Adam's last girlfriend. What's her point?
And isn't there a more current reference than Barbara Eden.
I mean, if you're gonna just the ponytail, I mean even like who's it to Rinda who is like look at that matrix ponytail
You know at least she came to the matrix
Well, I constantly use charo, so I guess I'm gonna stay out of this one
I'm just gonna stand over here giggling. Yeah, well, at least Chara was on this
real life 10 years ago.
Oh, that's true.
Thank you.
Thank you for saving that.
So then, so Tinsley walks in with Dale,
and, you know, Ramona meets Dale
for the very first time in Dale goes,
you know, how is very stunning that way,
which to me was like such a wonderfully nasty
euphemism. And Ramona has known the Southern person before,
because she's looking at her like, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh.
Sorry, what's your first name again? Dale.
Oh, okay, like a chipmunk, huh?
Where's Chip?
So are you speaking out of the side of your mouth,
purpose?
Or, it's like, no Ramona, she literally speaks out of the side of your mouth on purpose? Or it's like no, Ramona.
She literally speaks out of the side of her mouth.
Don't take it personally.
But Ramona doesn't know, you know.
She's just like, well, welcome there.
It's a new modern energy apartment.
You know, it's edgy.
I'm sure you rescue Rangers have seen this before,
but the first time that I've ever done it, okay?
Is my look edgy?
So it turns like this over the time. Yours is the dolphin mind's the seal. that I've done it, okay? Here's my look, edgy. Ah! Ah! Ah!
Ah!
So it turns like goes over the top.
Here's his dolphin mind's a seal.
Just like that.
Just everyone knows.
She goes over the top, minor seagulls.
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
So it turns like that, right?
Termona doesn't do this.
She's like, I don't understand what's happening on this podcast, okay?
With you, I come on?
Okay.
So yes, go on.
I'm sorry.
So it goes to talk to Carol.
She's like, oh my god, I'm so overwhelmed.
Seriously, I can't even do this.
Like I'm out of my comfort zone.
I'm exhausting myself even talking about that.
I can't even.
Okay, I'm going to go look at the edge.
You're going to be again.
Hey, is this my boot ahead? Okay, I'm gonna go look at the edge of your economy again.
Hey, is this my boot ahead?
So, yeah, Tinsley's whole thing is like, I can't move, I can't move to Loeys,
I can't move to Soho, it's too much for me.
It's like, okay, relax, Tinsley, here's a tissue.
So now, now this is cruel editing.
This is really cruel editing
because the same episode where we have the woman's march, which of course was a great moment in feminism and lady power and Rara Rada
power of the pussy hat in Wax Harry Dubin. It's like, oh, it's a reminder that no matter
how far women come, they'll always have to deal with Harry Dubin's. He goes right up to oh no it's
Ramona first he's like whoa that hair and those boobs Jesus Christ shut up Harry Dubin.
He is such a sleaze and the fact that he keeps showing up season after season and some
of these women have done him. So Ramona Ramona is such an asshole.
She's saying, I ain't fighting Luwea,
but also Harry Doobin.
Ah, ah, ah, ah, totally forgot.
I mean, how could I?
And also, Missy, who knew she was gonna come up? Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah this guy. Oh, I just want to throw up on my mouth. He goes
Oh, I've known your daughter for a very long time and Dale's like
Who is this Harry Jew
Tinsley's like oh yeah, I'm at Harry when I was a Miami modeling with Kelly Benzimo
What and then they're like oh, yes. I remember that. Those are the years that we didn't talk about you.
Those are the dog years for our family.
Geez.
So that's what we're calling Saudi Arabia now.
Those are two yacht girls that I've ever seen, Lyn.
So he's been disgusting.
And he's like, I like that cross on your chest, Tinsley.
And she's like, oh yeah?
Well, oh, thank you.
Yeah, I wore this cross at my wedding. And he's like, well, it looks great on your chest, Tinsley. And she's like, oh, yeah, well, oh, thank you. Yeah, I wore this cross at my wedding
And he's like, well, it looks great on your chest deals like
All right, well, we're moving your things back to Palm Beach
Even though we just got everything out of West Palm, we're gonna put them back in West Palm
West Palm So We're gonna put them back in West Palm. West Palm.
So let's see,
Sonia Watson.
Sonia Watson with this giant fur coat.
She's like, I'm not thinking that in a rack
in the hallway and it's like huge fur coat.
So from I was like, okay, we'll put it on the bed, okay?
I'm sorry.
And then of course Harry goes up to her and I was like Hello, Sonia
She's like, oh
I already been
I'm in she of course turns into Flirty Sonia
He kisses her on the lips and then she gives that look like
And turns away and does the spin for him. He's like yeah, do it again spin
She's like this is the bruise on the back of my calf. He's like, yeah, bruise. Yeah,
bruise. Can't.
She goes, well, he could be my fifth husband in the nursing
home. He could use the blue gel, all use the pink gel. We could
fight over Scrabble.
Please, some of you's realistic, you know, yeah, that's true.
That's true. I mean, if they both wind up in a nursing home
Then I have then they have my blessing unlike Luan who walks in with Tom and kiss you know says kisses
Hello to everybody. She's like hello
Well, it's nice to go to a party with Tom and just feel how happy everyone is for us
It's like really as everyone I'll start whispering yeah exactly remember when I said no one does that and this this is what happened they're all whispering
They're like except for you see half the way is dressed at the botanical gardens winter wonderland
standing
I'm sorry. She will be talking about my wedding. I did look stunning. Thank you so much
Now we're talking about Anne half the way. Oh, yes, when I won that Oscar, yes.
Man, what would you believe it girls? I'm an Oscar winner. I'll never mind.
Sophie's choice. Sophie chose Tom.
But you couldn't have it because he's mine. Can you believe it girls?
But you couldn't have it because he's mine. Can you believe it girls?
The Hank the caterer was super into the land Tom as I would have been if I were there I he's like congratulations
Everyone's done me how off the charts it was
Yes, he's so he's so fake. He's like said you like it
It's like he says that with the same face he introduced to Sam and Moose with, you
know, it's like caterer face. And I've worn it for many years. I recognize it. Caterer day.
You know that guy goes back to the kitchen and just calls everybody to see word.
That's true. It's like one time I got roped into marching in the gay pride parade a few
years ago here in LA. And there was this little guy this little gay
Who had a megaphone and he would go to the audience and go okay
One two three gay pride in the answer the crowds. We go gay pride. He's like one two three gay pride
One two three gay pride and then he dropped the microphone a megaphone
He would turn to us and goes okay, I need a little bit more cheer from you guys
Thanks one two, gay pride. Just turn evil on you. I was like,
listen, sir. I need a little more spirit in your fingers. Okay. This is gay pride, not
same pattern, stay okay. One, two, three, gay pride. Gay pride. Girls. So then they show Bethany. She's not at the party, but she's like,
why the hell would I come to that party? Hit Romana. I hope she dies. Like seriously, like even if it was
a funeral, I wouldn't go unless they had like an area where I could just piss on a grave. And then
Romana's like, well, you know, Bethany's not here, but she RSVP. So maybe that's progress. You know,
just a little cut to Bethany.
I don't like her. That's it. I'm not gonna go.
I like what's the deal. You know what I like? My bar. That's what I want to keep. I want to keep my bar.
I'm gonna get rid of Ramona. She's my clutter. Okay. Literally, I can't. Like literally, her
smarty get rid of the bar from Ramona.
So Ramona is now talking to I think Dorenda and Carol and Ramona is like, you know what?
She was just as bad as me, okay?
She was just as bad as me.
And I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I know of that, true.
She was, hey, she was just as bad.
Wow, I'm not sure.
She's like, okay, look, I don't remember, okay. I should have walked away. She made me freaking nervous
Okay, she skisses shit out of me during this like
Tell her you would drunk tell her you would drunk
Thank you for my
I use alcohol as an excuse all the time
Yeah, even Carol's like listen, it's fine. Just if you just say you were drunk and scared
Show like that. I was like what I got hot headed and I agree with you both, okay?
You know face it. No one's perfect. I love Bethany, okay
And I'm just being a hard ass about it right now because I'm very upset and I'm pretending I'm not let's face it
Let's I like that she actually said let's face it. I love what she actually says her her go-to's
Yeah, we don't pull these out of thin air
They she says them so funny and then she's like look. I mean, I even have a photo of you, Carol, me, and Bethany right there. I look at it every day. Okay. I don't have to look at it on page six of the New York post. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, but I don't. Then Carol's like, yeah, well, you also have a photo of you in Avery and Hillary, right? I'm Clinton. You see how that's heard out. Well, well, you don't know when when Bethany missed handles the emails, that'll be another discussion. Okay.
When Bethany gets up state secrets through her emails, that was improving. Well, I heard from the guy who sells peanuts downstairs that is true. So it has to be true. I'm sorry.
that's downstairs that is true. So it has to be true.
I'm sorry.
Sorry.
Okay.
So now Missy's there.
Yes.
Who is the one that was making out with Tom,
I guess, at the Regency?
When Lou interrupted and still Tom away.
Yes.
So Tom is like, oh yeah, we met once before.
I think it was at the Regency.
When he goes could be probably
Meanwhile Ramona goes I don't know what I was thinking when I did the invites like oh please Ramona
You knew exactly what you were doing and we thank you she does that little temple thing where she's like poking at her own temple
She's like you know sometimes I'm just not thinking I'm
Hot headed. I don't remember.
Okay.
So much edgyness in here.
I just forgot.
You know what's really edgy?
Not remembering things.
Okay.
Hey, it's just like Edgift Tomorrow, my favorite movie.
Then they show Missy and Tom alone together
and she's all awkward and she's like nice ring.
And he's like, yeah, still getting used to it.
It's like a dog with a collar. Geez. Suddenly Wampols him away and she's like, yeah, still getting used to it. It's like a dog with a collar.
Geez.
Suddenly, Wampolzum away and she's like,
oh, so is that the woman from the Regency?
He's like, well, there's a lot of women at the Regency.
Wamp, I mean, it's the Regency.
It's a women are allowed there, okay?
Yeah.
Oh, the one you dated, he's like, yes,
but she's happy for us.
She's so very happy for us.
And then I was like, great. And she gives this like, I see smile.
And, uh, that's, that's a Luan specialty.
Her eyes smile is one of the most devastating features about Luan.
And well, was she sporting it that night?
Yes.
That is the, I'm throwing away the Sarkudary leftovers when we get home.
Yeah.
That's the look of, well, enjoy having no cookies in your, in your
Tom's cookie jar.
But of course, she's like, Oh, it's great.
I'm so friends with my ex's.
And that's just the way to be.
So poor, you know, I think it's great that Tom is still, I think it's great
that Tom is still friends with that, that slut missy.
I mean, you know what?
She's probably lonely.
She doesn't have friends.
I'm kind of her being a slut. You know it's why it's why Tom works for the suicide
prevention line. You know sometimes people want to kill themselves and he'll just you know eat them out
or make out with them for a while. It's called saving lives people poor depressed Missy over there
needing help. Tom's just like a life hack.. Yeah, so Missy's sitting with Harry, and Harry's trying to get the scoop.
He's like, so, so he dragged you into the bathroom at the Regency and kissed you, huh?
Huh?
And meanwhile, Tom's in the corner, and be like, oh, Harry, he's such a charmer.
And Harry tells Missy, sweetheart, you're the full package.
She's like, okay, I think it's time to go.
There's a lot more lighting in here
than there is in that agency bar and it's horrifying.
So smell like rancid blue cheese and you're too close to me.
We'll see you in a go.
She kisses everybody, double kiss to Tom
and one or double the Lou and single to Tom.
I don't know why I wrote that down,
but I thought it was some kind of code.
He's more scared.
Help.
And then Sonia's like, oh, that Ramona's a potster.
And she knows that, you know, she just has to have them all there at the same time.
But I don't see why he's talking about you being with Tom.
I mean, what about Lou Ann being with Harry?
God.
Sonia never dropping it. Never, ever, ever, ever. I mean, what about Lou Ann being with Harry? God, Sonya never dropping it.
Never, ever, ever, ever, ever.
I love this. So so good. Wow. Well, here we are. We made it to the end of this
Thursday episode. If you haven't listened to the our, our, sort of, our, our accompanying
episode with Katie Kazzorello, where we talk about Second Wives club and we talk
about New York again.
You should go listen to that
because it's just super fun.
Her audio levels are a little janky,
but you know, we did that with our tribute to New York.
Yeah, it's our phone conversation, y'all.
Everybody, we sure love you.
We will be back tomorrow with little
Southern Chums of Anna.
Yes.
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