Watch What Crappens - #63: Paris Is Slurring

Episode Date: March 6, 2013

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From Wondery and Audible comes Class of 88, a new podcast hosted by Will Smith. Before 1988, a lot of people didn't take hip-hop seriously. But hip-hop today touches everything from film to fashion to sports. So what changed? Follow Class of 88 wherever you get your podcasts. Hey everyone, welcome to Watch What Crap In's, a weekly podcast about all that crap that we love on Bravo. I'm Ben Mandelker from bsideblog.com, and you can find me at bsideblog on Twitter and Instagram and Facebook. And joining me as always are Ronnie Karam from tvgasm.com. Hi, Ronnie. Well, hello, everybody.

Hi. Ronnie is at tvgasm on Twitter. And Matt Woodfield from Yahoo. Hey, Matt. Bonjour, mes amis. Bonjour, monsieur. Bonjour. Fafala.

Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafala. Fafalala, parla. Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. Matt is at Life on the Endless on Twitter and also on Instagram. And you can find this entire podcast on Twitter at What Crappens. And more importantly, you can find us on Facebook at facebook.com, watch What Crappens. And you really should follow us there because we reference that page a lot and

we've been putting up crazier and crazier stuff on that page i have to say and i hope you guys all really enjoyed the little collage i made of kim richards through the years that i put up as the header did anyone see that oh we saw it you guys still have your eyesight after it that was frightening and actually the reason why i found those photos is because someone posted a link to those photos on our facebook page see so it all works out so that's the only way i know anything anymore yeah it's through facebook i don't know anything that's going on in the world quite frankly no hell no i only know from our watch what crappens facebook page yeah to me like i don know, like Brandi Glanville's our new world leader.

I don't know anyone outside of this, our Facebook page. I don't know what's going on. Kim Richards is like a diplomat. She's, I don't know, she's crazy. Anyway, so gosh, we have a lot to talk about. Oh, by the way, Matt, your favorite listener, Eddie McGee, it's his birthday today.

No, it's not. It's actually on Friday, Ben. It's his dirty 30th birthday. Oh, wow. Oh, yeah. So you know all the details. Well, we're going to send you a piece of what's named soupy pie from the hill. I think that we should have Adrian.

We love you, Eddie. Happy birthday, buddy. have adrian we love you eddie happy birthday buddy we should send him a log um a dirty log filled with flowers from the adrian maloof line of floral arrangements so matt are is is eddie sort of like the sheena to your brandy or is there or is she more the uh kim richards to your brandy um well first of all i don't have an ex-husband for him to sleep with, so he would not be the Sheena. I think it's more, I don't know, it started out rocky, and it's getting better. It's getting better. So I think that I'm the Kim Richards, and he's the Brandy.

Because he apparently loves you. Well, we'll see about that. According to his friend who emailed us. You're the Sam, and he's the Diane. Yeah. Ronnie, I'm not old enough to know about Cheers, so can I have a reference from Bravo?

Okay, you are the Castle and he's that pretty lady on Castle. He's Stana Kaddick from Castle. You are the Jax and he is the Stassi. Oh my god. There. I did it. I am it jacks because i'm wearing

a chunky sweater right now in honor of the reunion but that makes you so stupid though i don't care he's beautiful amazing and i'm team jacks the and he deserves to get beat i can't wait to talk about i am so excited for vanderpump rules but first we have to get through some stuff we have a lot to talk about so why don't we get going with the gossip okay so someone speak well really i think all we've got this week um is that camille and brand uh camille and adrian are for sure out and they're both claiming that they quit but uh rumor has it that camille was not asked to show up at the reunion at all she was asked not to attend specifically what is up there what is that does andy just hit her yeah and the adrian

was fired um camille's horrible and is apparently sided with stupid ass adrian and this is what perez is saying and you know perez is right about everything. Including parenthood. And he's a new dad. He is? Yeah. Yeah, he like adopted a baby or something. From where? I don't know. From some country that did not have its priorities straight. No kidding. Jesus, no wonder

Russia stopped letting us have babies. Yeah, seriously. Okay, so let me see here. Okay, first of all, Adrian's quote everything i read now that it's hateful to anyone else in the cast i know is adrian because she's the she's the one calling the tabloids all the time yeah but this isn't hateful but this is her quote to my loyal fans it was time to exit real housewives the show served as a wonderful platform for all the amazing projects that i have in the works i'm forever grateful to my fans thank you for your support and stay tuned xoxo a shut up shut up i thought

my computer crashed for a moment there my computer was like is that patty and selma yeah two non-smoking i like that adrian talks about all her projects that she's doing like uh launching a crappy shoe line and destroying an nba team yeah drag queen shoes um turning a nice hotel into a piece of shit uh like juarez hotel yeah what else is she magically transformed oh she's horrible she She turned a diner... She busted up the Sacramento Kings, right, Ben? Yes, she destroyed the Sacramento Kings. She's raping a

drunk baby, Rod Stewart's child. Yeah. She's shown light onto Paul's plastic surgery care. Plastic surgery for monkeys by monkeys. Yeah, she's given rubber a bad name Yeah

She's ruined tinsel for all Christmas trees Moving forward So here is what else this article says Both women felt like malicious and untrue things Have been said about them and their businesses On the show with no legal recourse. And agents don't want their clients getting that sort of treatment. Okay, Camille Grammar, you have no business except your pussy.

And nobody has said anything about your saggy ass pussy on the show. Excuse me. Please refer to her as a dancer. Well, let me tell you something. I could not believe all the bad things that were said about Camille's businesses. I was like, someone call up Fortune 500 and make sure they realize that these are all lies. Now, Camille is, everyone knows that she's a huge businesswoman with lots of projects. Ben, what is wrong with you? You and I, I mean, I still love Camille.

I don't like that she's siding with Adrian, but I love Camille. And I think the show is worse without her. Well, I love Camille, but for her to talk like her businesses are being put into unfair light when she has literally no business. In fact, I almost appreciate the fact that she was the one housewife that wasn't trying to turn a cotton ball into the Camille Grammar cotton ball. But here she is talking about her business? What is her business?

She has no business. I think that we have not been given a number from her settlement. It was estimated to be about $50 million. But this is the way I look at it. She's kissing Adrian's ass for no reason. She's got to not get that much money from her settlement. And she needs Adrian to help her somehow. Because Adrian is rich.

And that's the only reason I can think that anyone would stand up for Adrian. She's horrible. Except that Camille is also a horrible human being. And I will never forget season one Camille as long as I live. Why do you hold a grudge against season one Camille seriously? Because I believe that it's like Oprah said way back in the day. People tell you who they are within the first five minutes that you meet them. So when you first met Ben, what did you think?

What did he tell you? Well, I think I met Ben through reading one of his recaps and he is pretty much what he says he is slutty racists and really an asshole in general the first time i met you in real life matt you said um let's stand over here and talk about everyone at this party and you did that was was the first thing you said to me. And we have been best. We've been like little besties ever since. Is that when we were at a party at Ben's house and I was like, who are these people?

Let's talk shit about them. Yes. And we had a great time doing it. That was almost a year ago. And I don't think there will ever be a change in our relationship. There will never be a bump along the road that I'm not ready for because I know you. You told me who you are. You know that I'm going to be gaining and losing 100 pounds every year that you know me and that I'll cry half the time that we're on the phone.

Anyway, I believe that people are who they say they are. And Camille, I mean, Camille's first five minutes on screen was like, I had surrogates because I don't want to mess up my body. I'm a dancer. And then you see her badly dancing in her giant home that she had to take a golf cart to the dance studio from the kitchen or whatever. I mean, the woman's an asshole. And she was married to Frazier, and they got set up to – I mean, she's horrible. She's a horrible human being.

Well, I definitely came to love Camille. But then this season, she reminded me that there was a time when I did hate her. So I think she's – it's a draw for me. And I think – I'm shocked that she got fired, though. She must have done something really wrong if she got fired. Well, they should have fired her because anybody that doesn't show up to the reunion taping, that's probably part of their contract. So they should have been like, okay, lady, you don't want to show up on March 1st when we're taping? You're gone.

Yeah. Yeah, I guess so don't want to show up on March 1st when we're taping? You're gone. Yeah. Yeah, I guess so. It hurts the show. Well, Adrian's excuse for not going is because she knows that Brandy is going to bring up her divorce. And she supposedly had to sign some papers with Paul that they wouldn't be talking about their marriage publicly. And she didn't want to be goaded into talking about it so that Paul could sue her. And blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But that's her fault for using lawyers for every goddamn thing in her life instead of just being a grown-up and talking about it so that Paul could sue her and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But you know what? That's her fault for using

lawyers for every goddamn thing in her life instead of just being a grown-up and talking about stuff. Exactly. No one even cares about Adrienne anymore anyway. The way I see it, rumor is fact. And she didn't have those babies. She's an alien. And she's 450 years old. That's what I've

heard. And that's what I'm going to believe. Yeah. She looks like a and that's what I'm going to believe. Yeah. She looks like a basketball that's been stepped on with a really hot foot that's kind of melted the front of it. And then stretched over a bongo drum. That's what her face looks like.

But if you punch her, it doesn't make a nice little percussion noise. It just makes that... noise. It's the Adrian Maloof drum drum it's another one of my businesses yeah she's horrible i hope that her and camille um decide to finally drive themselves to the outlet mall one day and crash into a shutout bus. Well, why don't we start talking about this week's episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills where the gang went to Paris.

We saw no Adrian. We saw no Taylor because they weren't on board. So it was, in my estimation, it was like a fine episode. It was not the most exciting. Once again, it reminded me that the New York ladies do vacations the best.

And Beverly Hills, their vacations are a little tame. But, you know. Beverly Hills, I don't think has ever done a good vacation, have they? They did Hawaii last year. Hawaii was terrible. Where did they go the first season? Did they go anywhere? They went to Vegas at the beginning of the season.

And that was kind of fun because we got to see Camille rubbing up against everyone's head. Yeah, and they went to New York. We got to see Taylor wasted for the first time and getting dragged off by Russell. And then we got to see Taylor start all that fight with, I mean, that season-long fight with Camille and Kyle. Well, that was in New York. That was in New York. Oh, okay. But they didn't have, like, I don't know if they had like a big big old vacation but so anyway so they went to paris this season and uh you know the big drama was was kim

did she fall off the wagon and the answer to everyone watching at home was a resounding hell yes like she so obviously was beyond drunk she couldn't she was not even on the wagon she was standing in the middle of the street, and the wagon ran her over. And she felt nothing because she was on so many pills. I can't believe she got out of the sleeping bag. She is sober, you guys. You are horrible. She is sober. It's so sober in Paris.

I just want to sit at a cafe and talk about Van Nuys and the pills in Paris. How great was it when she was like, these are pills that are keeping me sober. When she said that. They keep me sober. I feel like not sleepy.

Darling, why were you so late? We were just with each other six hours ago. What have you been doing? You've been sleeping this whole time. Nah, you ain't even sober than me. We were just together. We were just together. We were just together. No, we weren't. I spent the day with Yolanda over here. I didn't spend it with you. You left

before lunch. No, girlfriend. Don't even start that with me. We were just together. We were just, you know, okay. We were together. We were together. I mean, that was just a Paris. Yeah, that was...

I don't know. Of course, I was laughing. You need sleeping pills. That way you slept so long. Hi, guys. That means I'm falling off the wagon. That was true. He's trying to make me look bad.

Like, honey, you don't remember where you've been for six hours? That's making you look bad, Cam. Yeah, that's what makes you look bad. Like, honey, you don't remember where you've been for six hours? That's making you look bad, Cam. Yeah, that's what makes you look bad. And the fact that when you were awake and accounted for, you were slurring your head off. Oh, my God. I love this, Sam. Gosh, well, it's 12.01, which means

it's technically afternoon, so I really have spent the whole afternoon with you. I'm going to go to sleep and tell everyone we spent the whole afternoon together. Listen, if this was America, I would have gone to sleep and then I wouldn't have woken up until yesterday. So now you tell me

the last time I saw you was. You know, this casino in Vegas has become very convincing. I love the Paris Casino and they've done a great job with it in this year. It's like they have even put in a full river

and a full-size tower? This is a great casino. Hey, if this is a Sears tower, how come they're not having a sale on acid-wash jeans? That's what I want to know. Sears has never let me down like this. Sears should actually give her her own line of

silver-plated picture frames. If she had her own line at Sears, I would buy it. Dust-free. There's one thing she loves. It's a good picture frame that she can hang up. I'm surprised she didn't try to rob all those little vendors

that are along the Seine and take all their picture frames with her. Oh, Kim. Well, I felt bad uh because i mean look she's been drunk every episode we've seen her in yeah but this is the drunkest i thought this was the drunkest and when lisa was saying like well she definitely seems better than she was last night i'm like what are you crazy she is wasted she's been sipping wine down in the bistro yeah hayley think can't gosh you guys it's so nice to see you and talk to you.

Cause I haven't really seen you since I've been back. And now, you know, maybe you could come over and I could show you how to make a salad or something. I mean, I know you know how to make a salad, but I can show you how to do it.

Kim style. Cut to two towns cramming into a bowl of chicken salad. To a closeup of chicken salad. Cut to a close-up of chicken salad with, like, Lee Press on nails. Cut to a glass of wine in the middle of the chicken salad with a straw that she sips from as she makes the salad around it. I'm using that wine to help get me sober.

Okay, what drugs do you take that help get you sober? Anybody? Xanax! Yeah? Xanax. Yeah, Xanax gets me real sober. Valium. Valium is a great sober drug. Xanax is just a movie that Olivia Newton-John was in. She was wearing roller skates in it.

What a movie. Whatever happened to the feather cut? I love that haircut. You know what drug keeps me real sober? Schlitz. Schlitz. You know what drug keeps me real sober? Schlitz. Great.

Oh, my God. Rubbing alcohol isn't real alcohol. I have a cut in my stomach. I took some NyQuil, but the thing is, it didn't really taste so good, so I poured the NyQuil out and put the wine in the bottle, but it was still NyQuil because it's still in the bottle. It felt real good. Well, I mean, I feel bad laughing so much about Kim because God bless her, she just wants to be

she wants people to think she's sober so badly, and she's just not. She never has been, and she's not going to be. I don't think she's going to be. I mean, I feel terrible saying that, but Lord knows I know my alcoholics. I'm well-versed. And that's just, I've never heard of taking drugs.

Like, why is a sleeping pill you relapsing but not all the other drugs you're taking? And in her Bravo blog, I think I mentioned this last week, but in her Bravo blog, she said that she was not wasted at all that she just took the wrong medications and they made her act like that classic off the wagon excuse maybe she was borrowing some of Tom's Ambien Tom from Vanderpump Rules

oh yeah he'd taken accidental Xanax made him take off his sweater yeah that happens to me all the time taking drugs and and mj all accidents i know um i what i sort of loved was that um kim after all this when they went to go to a cooking class i think called cooking with class um and they had to like sever duck heads she was the only one that like didn't give a. She's like, ah, whatever. Who cares? Everyone else is scared. If it ain't quacking while we're whacking.

Ben, I mean, she is a connoisseur of chicken salads. And you know that she rings the necks of those chickens before she gets her hands all up in there. That's true. And she probably loves eating duck only because she knows how much her sister hates it. She's probably like, hey, Kyle, here's a duck for you. You're going to eat it or not eat it. I guess we're not close anymore. Well, this brings us to

kind of an annoying thing with Lisa, because in that van on the way to cooking class, Lisa was asking her if she took a sleeping pill and kind of teasing her. Because Kim was obviously off the reservation. But Lisa was trying to have fun. I don't think she meant to hurt Kim's feelings.

Yes, she was. You guys need to get off the Lisa train right now. Lisa was. Last night, everything changed for me. And Ben, you just said a second ago, like, oh, it was very British of her. Actually, I think it's just very much of an asshole of her. No, I think, well, like I said, it's very British of her. And I think it's, honestly, she was just pissed off, I think, because she waited so long for Kim to get ready.

And it was asshole. And she was just pissed off I think because she waited so long for Kim to get ready. And it was asshole and she was definitely needling for sure. But that's just Lisa. I like her. Look, I mean my favorite part of the entire episode actually was later at the dinner table where she continued to talk it to death with Maurice because she knows – she only had that conversation with Maurice because she knows that Maurice has had conversation with maurice because she knows that maurice has had issues with um kim in the past and i my favorite part was yolanda going like um can you stop talking about it oh be quiet now we have already talked about this we are not talking about it anymore you'll be quiet be quiet on me thomas kramer has arrived now is the time we don't talk about communities anymore this is my dinner party I am dumber for coming here Who invited you?

Get out! You know, I think it is very important for every young girl To have a horse that they can call their own And to have walks along the Seine And that you don't talk about them at dinner I think that's very important Now excuse me, I have to fly on a private plane back to my husband where i will deliver him a rose and then i will fly back it's very romantic i have to put a heart on this plate for my husband because i love

him meanwhile david foster is back some made under a lemon tree yeah he's going nine and a half weeks with that glassy refrigerator um so anyway so i so i don't can't remember anything else really happening lots of notes can i just like run through the list please go through because you're not even talking yeah you're being quiet okay well um i have i have a list of a few things, and I would like to start first off with my other favorite moment where Mauricio bought Kim a purse, but she referred to him as Morris the cat. M-O-R-R-I-S. Not Mauricio, his real name, but Morris. Oh, Morris. This is such a nice verse.

Can't wait to fill it up with chicken salad. Why am I obsessed with her calling him by his wrong name? I love it every time she calls him maurice because i think she called him maurice also oh well i think she called him maurice but now i think it's sometimes morris whatever it all works for her okay um do we care anymore about uh yolanda and brandy becoming best friends i think it's kind of bizarre oh i like it because they're both pretty. And they're both models from the 70s. And by the way, Lisa looked

fantastic as she was walking through the streets of Paris. Did she not? She did, but stop taking that fucking dog everywhere. It's really ridiculous. And don't let it eat off of the dinner table. I'm sorry. It grosses me out. I love dogs, but when the dog is sitting at the dinner table and drinking out of the glasses, it's gross.

Yeah. Yeah. Also, you know, with that dog with Ken, I mean, like two gays don't make a straight. Okay, just stop it. I mean, at this point, you're just looking like a bad, I don't even know what to say. You're just looking like a hag at this point. Drop the gays. Yeah. a hag at this point. Drop the gays. Academy is a new scripted podcast that follows Ava Richards, played by HBO's Industries' Myhala Herald, a brilliant scholarship student who has to quickly adapt to her

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Black is beautiful. No offense, gays. A hag on wheels. And then how gay was it when Mauricio and Ken were having a date on Segways? Oh my gosh. I thought one of them was going to fall into the sin. I thought Segways were so 2003. Do people really still do that shit?

No. Mauricio struggling to have a personality is just really tough to watch. Yeah, so this is a street that people come here to in Paris, and they like to look over the river because look at that building. That is the guy who invented high hills. That's where he lived. And then look over there. That's a cloud. They're different in Paris because Paris has different kinds of clouds.

Look at that bridge over there. People use that bridge because they like to drive over the bridge to get from one side of the place over the water to another side of the place. I love how one of our Facebook users, I was looking on there earlier today. I can't remember her name, but she was like, my goal in life is to fly to Paris and go find that bridge and cut their lock off so that their children cannot go to Paris later and see their parents' lock, and I'm going to throw it into the water. That is amazing. Whoever that is is my favorite best new friend. Or let's just lock another lock onto it. It was Kim. It says your parents are assholes.

Yeah. And I kind of wanted to find that lock. I was going to write on the Facebook page, like, if someone's in Paris right now, can you find that lock and take a picture of it? Instagram it. Oh. It's a very very amazing race find the one lock oh can we move on to vanderpump rules because beverly hills wait wait there's one other thing the one other thing beverly hills so much happened wait there's one other thing that happened in beverly hills which is that kyle who has never eaten duck in her life because she's classy that way, confronted Lisa on the Eiffel Tower about the fact that things are so weird between them.

And so Kyle was saying, like, I feel like you hold a grudge. And Lisa was saying, I don't hold a grudge. It's just that our friendship has changed, and that's just the way it is. Whose side were you guys on? For once in my life, I jumped off Lisa's bandwagon. Well, look, I agree with what you're saying that Lisa was an asshole last night. I think that going around talking about

Kim's drunkenness and trying to score points about Kim being a sad drunk is really tasteless and gross. But in that conversation, I get what Lisa is saying. Kyle not only didn't have her back. She not only didn't stand up for her she met with adrian before she knew adrian was going to be coming after lisa didn't say anything

to her and not only that but she added fuel to the fire by credit you know by the things she was saying to lisa at the reunion like she was hurt like she was feeding on weak people or whatever that okay i 100 agree i 100 agree with everything you just said, and I have hated Kyle all season long. I will just say Lisa does hold a grudge. She does. I do. If you came at me at the reunion and called me, basically accused me of giving stories and then said that I'm an asshole who's mean to weak people after I stood up for your asshole season, I would say, you know what, Matt? We're not really friends.

Like, you obviously don't really like me. Please use a different name. I'm starting to take this personally. Don't hold it against us. Eddie, on your 30th birthday, if you ever said that. If you ever said that to me when I thought we were best friends, and also

I've hated this chick Brandy all season long because you told me to and had no basis other than your word to stand up for you. And now I look like a complete asshole at the end of the year. You know, we're obviously just not that close. You've been talking shit about me all season and now I've seen what you really think of me. Why would I want to go have lunch with you? And also Kyle is super sensitive.

I mean, I understand. And maybe Lisa does hold a grudge. But quite frankly, you know, Kyle did some damage to the relationship. And it's like the point is that you've got to move forward, and you rebuild it. It's not going to go back to normal right away. And Kyle's like, oh, I just feel like this, and what can I do? And I feel like all you do is hang out with Brandy now. Don't act like such a freaking seventh grader.

And that came later in the fight because Kyle has nothing. She has no legs to stand on in has nothing. She was grasping for straws with that low blow. Looking for sympathy. Trying to feel sad. You've still been standing up for Adrienne when you know she's an asshole and you know they're enemies and you've been standing up to her constantly because

she's against Brandy and you don't like Brandy. You're just an asshole, Kyle. You're an asshole. I'm sorry to interrupt, but Kyle is trying to be goody two-shoes this season because we all know from season one and season two, she gets into serious fights and she yells at people

and she hasn't really done it this season and she's just trying really hard to be the good one. Maybe it's to help bring business into her future boutique. Kyle. It's not working out for her and the funny thing is i feel like she's one of those people that probably watches the season back and like takes notes so that she knows how to act going forward and yes i do think she's tried to tone

it down so that you know in in a way to have you know maybe bolster her fan base but the weird thing to me is i'm just surprised that she would not side with lisa because it's fairly obvious you know even before this season started even by the middle of the first season that lisa is probably everyone's favorite so kyle not siding with the favorite just is not a smart move well first of all she's not a smart woman if you remember in season two lisa got the bitch at it for the first few episodes yeah and maybe she actually was being a bitch because like especially after watching Vanderpump Rules we know that she is a bitch so she um she was getting the bitch at it big time at the beginning of the season and I think by the time that they did the reunion she was thinking that Lisa really didn't have everyone on her side like she did in

season one and so she thought it was probably safer to jump on Adrian's side because Adrian up to that point was a favorite. She had never been a bitch to anybody. She had been nothing but calm and nice and judicious. She was great. It wasn't really until that reunion that she turned into a total C word. So I think Kyle is like she's playing – she doesn't understand how things change over time and she's just picking the wrong horses. I mean someone said that on our Facebook page and it's just so accurate.

She hasn't played the game well. That true yeah she's just like she's playing based on the information she has now but not understanding that we don't have that information until months later and things change so fast and she's just not keeping up with it and she just needs to be her own person and let the chips fall where they fall you know exactly exactly that she shouldn't care so much about us she should just be friends with who she wants to be friends with and then we probably would like her more for that yeah and this year i think that after after last season you know and especially now about what we know about lisa you know that lisa wasn't hanging out with that bitch at all after that reunion you know that she was like fuck you i'm not calling you back i'm not having lunch with you ever and they

were actually friends before the show started they weren't just like friends for the show. Kyle supposedly the ringleader of this one and got everyone hired from the first season. So she was actually friends with Lisa and Adrian and all these women. And I think that now Lisa's like, screw you. And so Kyle knows that she's not going to have Lisa on her side. So instead of trying to fight her alone, she's going to jump on Adrian's side, not understanding that Adrian is now a gargoyle from hell and everyone hates him. Always was. Yeah.

Well, should we move on to Vanderpump Rules, speaking of all this Lisa Vanderpump? Yeah, I can't believe we got that much out of such a boring episode. It's true. Okay, well, speaking of Lisa then, so Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Vanderpump Rules, the girl is joining Dancing with the Stars, officially, which is crazy to me. Are we at a point where we're getting too much Lisa?

Because I'm thinking like three shows is too much Lisa. I'm good with it. I'm good. Well, I don't watch Dancing with the Stars. Are you not going to tune in at all just to see her? I may tune in once. No, I mean, look, I decided I was in a really dark place a few years ago, and I made the decision not to commit suicide. And I feel like that's going to reverse it for me. I just can't do it.

I've got to draw a line in the sand at some point in my life. Dancing with the stars does make me suicidal, and I gave up a few years ago, too. But I don't know. I just have a feeling that Andy Dick and Lisa Vanderpump, both on primetime TV, might lure me back. Listen, it'll be just a big letdown. We'll tune in once to see her, but it'll just be whatever. It'll be like, oh, here's another person doing the Paso Doble. It won't be anything special. It won't be

anything exciting. You'll see her panting and making some quips, and then that's gonna be it. Yeah. But Vanderpump rules, though. This reunion... Here are my general takeaways. One, I couldn't believe stupid Stassi with her sob story actually made Lisa's chin quiver.

That really disgusted me. Second of all, I really felt like Andy was way too easy on Stassi. He really didn't land. Like, Jax got a lot of shit, which was good. He deserved it. He got a lot of shit. He got way too much shit, and half of that should have been directed directly at no no he got he got as much shit as he deserved but she didn't get as she should have had as much as him they should have had equal amounts of shit you know and she really

like andy didn't like press her on things like do you think that maybe one of the reasons why people didn't like you is because you said really mean things and that you were like bratty and that you were a mean girl like he she just there was no accountability for her and it really really really pissed me off well she probably had some crazy power over him too and you know made andy scared i mean she would you know i don't i don't trust her i think that she's just as um you know volatile as laura lee you never know what would happen she's evil and i don't know why it was never like also brought up like why is it okay for you to have been quote unquote emotionally cheating aka vaginally cheating with frank

but it's not okay for for jacks to be with lauralee and oh my god you're sounding like a hypocrite like she is just as bad as he is no but i'm saying like why what why i don't feel like she was really held accountable for that they both were they both jumped into bed with other people but he was the only one who seemed to get real shit about it she got some shit but not really the same amount that he got and also she was totally fucking frank

by the way that was not emotional cheating that was vaginal cheating vaginal and rectal and mouth cheating. Maybe you're cheating, too. Maybe I suck at cheating. It was all over the place.

She probably got cavities from it. Well, and she also admitted like that. She was clearly still seeing Frank when they were taping the reunion. She's like, oh, yeah. Well, we ended a few days ago. Bullshit. Yeah. Yeah.

You know, Andy's terrible at his job. We all know that. He's never going to confront anybody. And when I listened to that stupid interview he did on the Jay Moore show, when Jay Moore asked him why he is terrible at his job, he's like, well, you know,

I'm not there to accuse him of anything. I want them to take care of all that. Which is the reason why the three of us should be hosting all reunion specials. Yeah. Oh, my God. We would have... Stassi would have stabbed us by the end of that that. Which is the reason why the three of us should be hosting all reunion specials. Oh my god. We would have... Stassi would have stabbed us by the end of that reunion. I would have stabbed

her right back. Yeah, I would have stabbed her. I would have punched her. It makes me crazy that nobody at all confronts Stassi about not starting to be a bitch after... I mean, she was a bitch way before all that Jack stuff happened. Thank you. Her first episode she was calling a girl she didn't even know a whore, a slut whore, blah, blah, blah.

She said that she was mean to people to get them fired, that she's gorgeous, she's a princess from Sweden or whatever. I mean, she was a horrible human being before any of this happened. And so for her to make it sound like, oh, everyone was mean to me and that's why everyone hates me. Everyone hates you because you're a horrible fucking human being. Jesus christ god flood the world again i'll build an ark and by the way mad mad props mad mad mad props to whoever was from san diego who drove up to sir and ridiculed stassi at her job that is exactly what you know that was honey bunny oh yeah it was definitely honey bunny you know that she just invited more people to do more of that going forward. Like, I think it was just such a phenomenal, I mean, we originally said we want people to go there and not tip her.

But what they did, my hat is off, just to be aggressive and just to call her out to be the bitch that she is. I think that's fantastic. Well, we know that she's an asshole. Now, what we did learn last night is that she actually has physically abused Jax. Yeah. And laughs about it. And laughs about it. And laughs about it. And is not.

And Jax says he deserves it. And nobody says a thing about that. I mean, should we bring Taylor Armstrong in as a special guest for the next reunion? Well, Jax is an idiot. And, you know, here's a guy who's like, yeah, I love not having to make decisions. I like when the girl makes the whole plan and everything so we don't have to think about anything like what a shock jacks doesn't want to actually use his brain for anything not even like how to put on pants so of course he's gonna like getting punched in the face because you know he's just

the biggest stupid block of wood of all time he is dumb and he has made terrible decisions. Why is he so in love with Stassi and willing to let her be so evil to him? I could not get over the fact that he admitted all of his wrongdoings and yet she just kicks this dying dog on the floor. Because he's an idiot. He's an idiot. That's why. And that's a great – Matt, that was a great question. And Andy should have asked it. Why do you – why are you like worshipping the ground that this girl shits on and her shit does stink and stinks real bad? She is trash. I mean he is not a great dude, but he – and yes, the modeling career might be fading or whatever, but he is hotter, and he is, despite all of his flaws, he is a nicer, better person than she is. He is a nicer person. Why is he putting up with her?

He probably doesn't feel like he deserves any better, because he's fucked up so much, and she's made him believe that he can't do any better. It's like a classic abusive relationship. Well, also, I think it's a tension. I think that he's someone who is supposed to be, in his mind, He's gorgeous. He was supposed to be a very famous and rich model. He never was. And he's actually got someone who cares so much about him that she'll beat him. She'll be, you know, she'll spy on him. She's probably got a tap on his phone. She gets him to work where she's working so she can spy on him or whatever. she's working so she can spy on him or whatever. Like to, you know, to a really stupid, insecure person, that means that it's, I mean, he even said it in his own words.

You know, I knew that she really loved me when she was sending those hate texts. Yeah, exactly. That was the other thing. I mean, that again shows how much of an idiot he is in that most people, when they see those texts, they say, you know what? Stassi is a real piece of work. She has real mental problems.

This is good that I got away from her, but he sees it as, oh, she cares about me. That's actually a classic abusive situation. I mean, we've learned that by watching every Lifetime movie network ever. I mean, Tori Spelling, Judith Light have taught us this on every Sunday night for the past 20 years.

I watched The Surrogate on Saturday night because I stayed in, and I watched The Surrogate on Lifetime. And I'll tell you something, I learned some real things. And you wonder why you're single. Listen, I may be single, but you know what? I know never to trust a surrogate ever again because they will try to take your baby hostage,

and you'll have to go live with them until the baby is born, and then you can kill them. But don't think you can kill them easily because they may be, because even if they're pregnant and their water is breaking, they will still carry around that shotgun and try to shoot you. And they will chase you around and abandon Malibu Mansion until they have you

dead. Next time, do that on a Saturday night. Invite me and Ronnie over, because it sounds amazing. I watched that with Lisa Timmons on Saturday, and it was kind of like the most amazing thing of all time. Everyone watched The Surrogate. It's really gripping.

And it all takes place in Toluca Lake. So another added bonus. I'm in! No, but seriously, though. Like, Jax, I can't even say that I said, I can't believe I started a sentence. But seriously, though, Jax. Literally. Did I use the word seriously and J jacks did i do that in the same

sentence god god is literally trying to kill what is happening to my life where i'm i'm seriously talking about jacks why doesn't that boy smarten up and walk up the street and get a bartending gig at the abbey where he'll make five times the money oh yeah that's a good point well because he probably thinks the abby is not a bar but it's actually like some woman named abby and he doesn't understand the idea that you can get a job at abby because it's like how do you get a job at a person like that doesn't make sense he does understand you shall kill me he does understand the importance of a chunky sweater what is up did you see the chunky sweater as the bartender on Watch What Happens Live? No, I didn't. No, I can't.

I can't. That shows in with Dancing with the Stars. Also with Andy's new bangs, his new chola bangs. No, thank you. Andy, please stop it. You're basically wearing the bangs that, what's that? Something about Mary, the cum bangs. Yeah, yeah. the bangs that um what's that something about mary the cum bangs yeah yeah um i think he's

trying to distract from the wonky eye which he really is upset about if you read his book but um or if you watched uh this part one of the shah's reunion when why is he upset about he's still a total dork even if his eyes were straight well do you think that he has a boyfriend like how could he date somebody and be as famous as he is? Would we know about it if he was dating somebody, or can he have somebody on the BF? Maybe he's the father of Press Hilton's baby. Or Sir Jessica

Parker's twins, because they're besties. I looked it up a while ago, because I think we talked about it on the show, and there was an article that popped up. I mean, this was a long time ago, but it said he was banging some model. He bangs really young, hot models. That's what I've heard. He bangs them at the Four Seasons,

and he makes sure that they enter separately so that nobody sees them together, and he doesn't ever make any of them his boyfriend. He just has sex with them. I've heard that he likes them young, not like Bryan Singer young, but he just likes a 22-year-old guy. Yeah, Bryan Singer. That's age-appropriate. Yeah. Bryan Singer young, but like he just likes, you know, like a 22-year-old guy. Yeah, Bryan Singer.

That's age appropriate. Yeah. Bryan Singer, hmm. I don't know. Would you rather have sex with Andy Cohen, Bryan Singer, or Perez Hilton? Andy Cohen. Andy Cohen. Like, there's not a question about that.

Like, that's like, as much as we rag on Andy Cohen, he's really adorable. And he seems relatively bright. I think he comes off as ridiculous Cohen, he's really adorable. And he seems relatively bright. I think he comes off as ridiculous, but he's probably smart. I feel like I would like him in real life. I just hate him on TV. Yeah. Yeah, Andy, we're available. Wait, no, let's get back to the reunion, though.

I have many other things. Where was Laura Lee? And do not tell me filming a movie with Jennifer Aniston, because that is not true. She was accepting her Independent Spirit Award, so she couldn't make it um slash is going to a mess i love when they corner jacks about like did you think it was a good time did you did you think it was a good time to break up with her after after you walked out of recovery meeting he's like well no i didn't realize and then i loved how they all laughed oh that, that's the other thing that you can tell why Stassi is so horrible.

Look, I don't like Laura Lee by any means, but Stassi, if she had the opportunity, Stassi would murder Laura Lee. Absolutely. Absolutely. I also thought it was like Sheena was on ultra bitch mode, by the way. I don't know what Sheena's deal was.

Oh, Sheena is such a piece of garbage. I think she's trying to get in with Stassi, right? Well, she's clearly in with Stassi. Now they're like best friends there. Oh my god, they're like so tight. Oh my god, like let's go have like a road trip to Aziz. I know you didn't mean it when you called me a whore. I look like a whore? I know you didn't mean it. I know you're just trying to ruffle my feathers.

The only... Sheena, how gross is that? Like, you had some respect in the beginning of this season because you stood up for yourself. But now that you're just all up her ass to be best friends with the Queen Bee is disgusting. That woman was nothing but horrible. And you know what? The scary thing is what that did to me. It made me go, oh, my God, I'm team Kristen.

Horse face. Me too. I became team Kristen. Me too. Kristen was like, excuse me, I've actually been her best friend for the past three or four years. You are new on the scene, and you are nothing more than a trashy cast member from Azusa, honey.

I was totally team Kristen. I love when Andy was like, well, do you still think she looks like a whore? And she's like, no, no, I don't. And Sheena's like, well, it's okay, because you look like a whore. And I love that they're talking about how much of a whore Sheena doesn't look like when she's sitting there in a fucking leather bustier. With a neck

tattoo. With her belly hanging out. With her belly hanging out. And she's also the one who did have the relations with a married man. And she's also the one who's best friends with her mom and anybody that's best friends with their mom is clearly like in a Gilmore Girls situation which is inappropriate. Yeah, totally

inappropriate. You know what? I have become Team Horseface through this all. I sort of, I guess there's a part of me that always knew I'd come around to Horseface. Well, the funny thing is I was laughing watching all this crap the other night because I was like, oh my god, how cyclical is all of this stuff? You know, Beverly Hills like now I'm starting to hate Lisa and starting

to like Kyle again. It's like all of these shows, all of these characters, that's what happens and now I'm Team Horsey as the season ends so who knows you know next season i'll be back to you know liking sheena for a minute well here's the thing though with vanderpump rules they're all so deplorable that you really only like them for about one second until you were like oh wait oh they're an awful person also so no i don't like them i like this person instead oh no they're terrible too oh i like stass now. Wait, no, no, no. The good news is

we will luckily be able to do this again next year because the ratings have been so good for this show. They've been clocking in at 1.4 million viewers, which is about three times plus what Gallery Girls was doing. Our beloved, departed Gallery Girls.

Gal Girls. So Vanderpump will be coming back back whether we like it or not slash i think we all love it yeah i mean i do at this point i really do enjoy it it's like i really hate watch it at this point like i i get so much satisfaction and let me tell you something to everyone who's listening if you're watching and like oh my god i can't believe you guys make me watch this show it's so bad do yourself a favor if you can find a friend to watch it with because i've watched a few of these episodes with with other people and when you watch it with a friend and you talk smack about these people like as you know on the fly it's really great it's if you feel wonderful about yourself i really can't recommend it enough for sure and how disgusting do you guys also feel

i mean the shows that we're talking about tonight, you know, Atlanta, obviously, the women were visiting L.A. They're primarily based in the Dirty South. But Shaw's, Vanderpump Rules, and Beverly Hills, we live amongst these horrible, horrible people. Well, I don't want to name drop, so I don't want to weigh in too much on this topic. Do you not feel a little bit disgusting? Like, all horrible people flock to Los Angeles, including us. Well, hello. Have you ever listened to us? We are horrible people. We are the same.

We just make a lot less money than those assholes. I mean, look, imagine us being followed around all day. What have you done this week? I almost ran over a bicyclist on purpose. I ran him off the road. I just ran into a homeless person and I almost pushed a baby out of their crib

in the Whole Foods because you know what? Whole Foods has very, very tight aisles in West Hollywood. Don't bring your fucking baby and park it so you can go look at organic beans. I would push that baby out the car. Ronnie, what are you doing in Whole Foods in the first place? Let's get to the real root of this. Oh, I live right by it.

I buy my chocolate chips there and I go to the salad bar to get mac and cheese. How gross are the old people that eat the food off the salad bar at that West Hollywood Whole Foods and they just eat it directly off there before they pay for it? Well, of course, because all the old people there are like, they've just gotten off

the boat from Siberia. I mean, they're just like these old Russians who spend the majority of their life in a gulag where the most they get is porridge. They see one green leaf of lettuce and they're going to eat it as soon as possible. They're not eating the lettuce. They go around and they actually take the cut up pita and they eat the hummus right out of the bucket on the salad bar. They do. I saw that one day, three different people, and one of them was an old man who sneezed on his hand.

Thank God. I mean that was new. It wasn't all over all of us. So he sneezed on his hand and then reached in and grabbed a handful of lettuce and i was like you know what i was about to go to the lettuce and i was like you know what no i'm never doing the salad bar again sorry whole foods because i know they're gonna be in your hair in my broccoli you know what you should have been vocal you know my new thing is to be i'm a horrible person i'm a horrible person on this podcast but in real real life, I am really terrible. And anytime I see that stuff happen, I give the nastiest looks and I say, would you like me to go get the manager?

I say those things. Yeah. These days, I've decided to start speaking up. Like old people at the pool, like at the gym pool, they have no – they walk through the swimming lanes. They get in the way. They hop into a lane where you're swimming, and they do this very slow breaststroke. And it's obnoxious. And one guy spoke up and was like, get out of my lane.

And then the old lady called a manager on him. And I was like, no. Why should we have to be nice to old people? They ruin everything. Yeah, exactly. Just because they're old doesn't mean I have to be nice to them. Because guess what? They're horrible.

Oh, my God. I'm the oldest person on this podcast, so I have to be nice to them. Because guess what? They're horrible. Oh, my God. I'm the oldest person on this podcast. So I have to say, respect your elders. You know what? I do respect my elders, but I don't respect a lack of respect. And if they're going to be putting their snot-filled hands into the hummus at Whole Foods, I think it's important to say something. It's not just the old people. I mean, trust me. Listen, you guys. You know who's horrible?

Humanity. The roided up queens from West Hollywood. They're just as bad. Oh, God. They're disgusting, too. We're all fucking gross. We're all disgusting. Get a good cable plan and stay in your house and get a KitchenAid stand mixer and learn to make you some pizza dough like I have.

You'll never need to leave again. Well, speaking of gross people who like to graze on food, should we move on to the Shazza Sunset reunion? Not until we talk about Tom crying about his friendship with Jax. Oh, yeah. Yeah, bro. Is Tom the one who shaves his face, bro? Yes, bro. He follows the Caroline Manzo beauty routine as taught at cafes.

Andy didn't say that. I know, right? I was thinking that immediately. I was like, oh, Caroline. Caroline might be like, I don't know. Wow. It looks like the effects of Cafface have made it all the way to West Hollywood. Well, let me tell you, I learned that from Manzo and I've done it.

I've been doing it ever since. I do it once a week. And guess what? I still have wrinkles and I look old and i do not look anything like so tom was like oh yeah so it means i don't have wrinkles and i'm sorry but i have like a big screen tv and hd bravo and hd he has terrible skin yeah he does you know there was pock marks everywhere i'm like you are shaving craters into your face and by the way and you know his hair does not look good if i may have a catty moment here,

a catty gay moment, his hair, for all the time he spends on it, looks ridiculous. He should just get a buzz cut or something and just move on. He should fall through God's floor like Katie and have to get a new face. Katie actually came off the best last night because she said

the least. I'm team Kristen. Well, Kristen and Katie are like the same. Which one is which again? Katie is the one. Kristen is extra horsey and Katie is more doughy in the face. Yeah. Okay, I like the doughier one. And Stassi is the one with the eyelash glue clumped in her

fucking eyeball that was making me insane last night. Did you see that chunk of white in her? Maybe it wasn't eyelash glue. I don't know. I was just staring at her fake chin. That was all abuzz today on the Facebook. That might have been some of Jax up in her eye,

not eyelash glue, but who knows? The most pleasure I took from that show, honestly, was, well, A, Jax gets beat, which I love. And I love that they're all still working at Sir. I don't know why I find that to be so hilarious. I love that they're all still working at sir i don't know why i find that to be so hilarious like i get that they're cast members of the show so they want to still be on the show so they're working at sir but wow you guys what would you get paid like five dollars

yeah i love reality tv because you don't ever really get a payoff unless you make it big like you are treated like total dog shit unless They're not rolling in that money. And they are so replaceable. They're so replaceable. By the way, outside scenes aren't even in the glamorous part. You know how on Housewives they're always like, alright darling, let's shoot in front of this store

on Rodeo. Vanderpump Rules are like, alright, let's shoot this scene in front of the Krispy Krest. Yeah, on Coinga. We're in the alley behind the Vanderpump Rules are like, all right, let's shoot this scene in front of the Krispy Krest. Yeah, on Coinga. Oh, yeah. We're in the alley behind the Smart and Final on Santa Monica Boulevard. Yeah. Isn't there a Planned Parenthood?

Oh, no. That's on Santa Monica. Never mind. Well, by the way, I like that, Tom, by the way. And this is my last thought on all this. I like that Tom actually called out Jax for almost being too happy to say, yes, I did everything wrong and I'm a liar. Almost as if, like, that excuses everything, you know? I thought that was, like, the only salient, you know, remark of the night. Yeah, good for him because Jax said that's true because Jax is like, okay, guys, I get it. I'm the bad guy.

I'm bad. It's like you're not really taking responsibility. Yeah. It's like when people say, I'm so sorry I'm not perfect. I have a friend who hates – that's her pet peeve when people say, I'm sorry I'm not perfect. That's not apologizing? Yeah. Ass.

Anyway. Yeah, let's move on. I can't believe – honestly, guys, let's read a book this week. Yeah. Alright, let's move on to another reunion that also showed people's friendships falling apart. The Shadows of Sunset Reunion Part 2. And I have to say, I think Reza, he,

honestly, he disgusted me with this episode. Disgusted. I'm like, you know what? Like, who knows if MJ does have a pill problem? Who knows? All of us. We all know. Kim Richards knows knows but you know what though it's like this is supposed to be your home girl of 20 years as he would like to say and he's just like shitting on her and it's like public forum and then when andy at a certain point was like why are you doing this and he's like well we're filming a reality tv show i'm like wow you were like the lowest of the lowest of the low it was that he is the biggest piece of trash on that entire cast he is in the gutter with gg and then

he and it's almost like he feels like by just making these things at the end by being like look at the end of the day we're like we're like all blood we're not we're not friends i owe i am indebted to everyone at this panel right now because without them then I would not be where I am right now and that's what we all say for each other so we are like family like that does not get you off the hook you can't just say evil things and then say that and then it's okay the crazy

thing is I have a feeling that MJ is going to be willing to forgive him well she did at the very end they were giving each other like friend romance looks and she's like that's the closest we've been this whole time. It's like, really, bitch? Like, he just, you want to talk about an abusive relationship. I mean, that's just terrible.

He calls her mom a hoe. I mean, bitch, you know, and she is. But still, like, if that's truly like your friend, like, you don't say that. You know, like, it was just, it was really obnoxious. I may call my mom a bitch in a hole but your mom is a bitch in a hole yeah right and he said that thinking that he was gonna get like ever all like his cast members to think that that was like funny and cheer him on and they were all like oh dude even even condescending mike was like reza reza what are you doing reza come on now that's

not nice it's just too stupid to even know what's going on he's such a condescending prick idiot i don't know it sort of like just made me depressed because you just sort of see these friends. It all falls apart. It reminds me, late last week, Bravo showed season one of Real Houses of Orange County. The best thing ever. And I watched the very first episode. And it was both really entertaining to see them in the beginning and everything. really entertaining to see them in the beginning and everything, but it's also very

sad to see how all these people's lives have been ruined by either the reality show or the economy, but basically the reality show. All the reality show. No one's life ended because of the economy. It was all the reality show. These shows destroy their families and their friendships.

No doubt. Vicky would still be with Don. Brianna would still have a good relationship with Vicky. Gina would still have that loving relationship with matt well we know that's not true her children would still be assholes but you know um no but like i just was watching this reunion it was just i just made me i was just sad it also disgusted me the whole reza thing you know a lot of you know gay men that are in relationships, you know, probably are in open relationships. I get that. But I'm just going to say, like, the fact that he is so proud of the fact that he's essentially cheating on the boyfriend, Adam, that clearly likes him for some godforsaken reason, really rubs me the wrong way.

Yeah, Reza should be so happy that he has a guy he should not be fucking around with that yeah when he says oh well you know i mean some people got upset that i said that that monogamy isn't for gays or whatever a stupid quote was but you know i think that people just aren't being as honest with themselves as i'm being no it's that you're a fucking whore okay everyone? Everyone doesn't live like that. Maybe we live in a town where that's kind of the acceptable way for the gays to be. And I know that most of us are that way. But that's not everywhere in the world.

There are fairly normal towns where there are normal gays and normal relationships. Absolutely. And you're not helping the cause. Right. And once again. Even if we are a bunch of whores, can we just pretend that we're not so we can start getting married and having babies the legal way? Please. Let's just try.

Ronnie, I hurt you for that. That's such a nice thought. Maybe we'd be more monogamous if we were allowed to be officially monogamous. Or if penises just didn't get so damn boring. I mean, let's be honest. Dear God, can you make penises a little bit more, like beg to differ a little bit more like

differentiate them a little bit more between each other i don't know it's just like the same thing it's like a rub and tug over and over i'm bored let's play some scrabble i'm getting disturbed because i'm thinking about reza's penis and rub and tug and scrabble and it's just too much you're thinking about that and i'm starting to think like let's just um have ronnie make us some homemade pizzas play scrabble and watch lifetime movie network oh my god i would love that that sounds like an awesome night yeah this is a great night already plan on the put it let's put it on the books put it on the books okay we need to talk about a few more things these fat bitches started to eat the set up you would never see a housewife eat anything placed in front of them on one of those reunions

and i actually thought that was wax food yeah It doesn't matter if it was wax food. Those piggies ate it up. I feel like the only one who wasn't eating was MJ, actually. The fat one never eats. Isn't that the truth? But Mike ate. Oh, ouch. And Reza ate.

He's a chubby playgirl model. Yeah. But the fat one's usually like, oh, I'm just just gonna have a salad this is just my metabolism this has nothing to do with how i eat yeah that's alexa persians and reza like a dry cookie apparently i don't even know what that means yeah i was like that's so persian persians love a dry cookie that's like so persian like white people like their cookies be moist and cooked properly but persiansians are like, oh, overcook that shit, homegirl.

That is kind of true, though. Have you ever been to the Armenian bakeries? They're all very dry. It's like Russian cookies. They're all dry. Well, you know what? Thin mints are dry cookies. People don't like their eggs.

Thin mints are dry. They are. I'm working my way through my thin mints. But here we eat with milk, so we're allowed to have dry cookies because the milk softens them, you know? Thin mints are amazing, by the way, everybody. That's my big statement for the day. I bought two boxes of thin mints this year and I'm already on to box two and I don't know if it's

going to last throughout the week. Oh my god, I ate an entire box the other day. I'm not even kidding. The entire both sleeves. Oh my god, Ben, shut your mind. Shut your dirty mind. I'm going to eat a Girl Scout this week. I just said I ate the entire box. That is so inappropriate. I was a little drunk, so I don't remember too much about the rest of the reunion.

I enjoyed it. Am I the only person who takes notes while I'm watching TV? I used to, and then I started feeling sad about my life. I'll take notes next week. I promise. I figured it would be easier for me to feel sad about my life. So I stopped. I'll take notes next week. I promise. I'll take notes. I figured it would be easier for me to feel bad about your life. Gigi seems proud of never having a job.

I really don't think that she has any shame. You know, Gigi, here's the thing. Every time I think of Gigi, I think of Gigi's extensions. And that cracks me up. Like, that's one of my favorite products of all time. And I don't know. I just can't help but smile. To be honest, I don't think Gigi came off too bad on this reunion. Well, she started going after Asa and saying, you know, you wearing all these gold bangle bracelets.

Why aren't you melting that down and, you know, giving your mom some money? Like, how did you think that all played out? Well, I think that Gigi was right. Well, Gigi was saying, Gigi was playing, doing that tricky walk where she was saying, I'm not judging you, but I'm saying if it were me, this is what I would do. Ben, that that that that tricky walk where she was saying i'm not judging you but i'm saying if it were me then that's not a tricky walk that is her straight up judging her well but she wasn't saying you should do this she's saying if i were in your like you can do what you want but if it were why should anybody listen to a um retarded little gerbil with fake hair who's never worked in her life and munchkin forehead forehead. And munchkin forehead whose daddy pays for everything.

Why should anybody listen to anything that comes out of her stupid ass mouth? But you know what though? I actually think she had a point which she wasn't articulating. Which is that if your parents are struggling. And you're sitting there with all this money. Give something back. But if your parents are doing well. And they can afford to pay for whatever. That's whatever whatever like that's okay and i think i

understand what she's saying there because the idea is that parents are always you know you always want to do like you want to be able to support your children and have them go out go on and go off do great things now gg of course is the extreme because she should be doing something with her life but she's just in no place to say anything because she's never got a job but the thing that really pissed me off is that well well, it didn't piss me off. But Andy asked three times what Asa did to make money, and Bitch never answered one time. She does not make money. There is no way she has a job.

No one can point out that she has a job. She won't say that she has a job. She keeps sidestepping the question every single time. So she's obviously being supported by somebody. Jermaine Jackson. You don't make any money. What's he making money from? It is her parents. She is totally being supported by her

parents. I will not leave anything else until I see some tax forms. She absolutely is. And her parents are sitting there without any money and Asa's driving around her white Mercedes. SL 550. And with gold bangles all up her arms and gold in her staircase and diamonds here and there. Really big, nice home, I think, in Venice, right?

Yeah, I mean. It's a really nice home. So I don't believe it. She's getting money from somewhere. The bitch doesn't work. And I don't care how many degrees you have, bitch. You are not working. And most people I know with two degrees have parents who paid for those two degrees.

And they are going back to school for something. They'll go back to school to learn plumbing as long as it means that their parents will still support them and they won't have to pay their own rent. And now here's the other thing. The other thing that annoyed me was that ASA weighed in about the fact that Gigi's never had a job. And they've given Gigi a lot of shit about that. But then Gigi should also be allowed to weigh in about Asa's money. Why is Gigi not allowed to

weigh in about it? If they're going to go there, she should be able to go there too. No, she shouldn't. Because she's Gigi and she's the devil part two right after Stassi. I don't know. I think I might be having a change of heart with Gigi. I'm always for the one who's getting beat up by everybody else, no matter who it is.

I always start feeling bad for them. Like in season two of Top Chef, Marcel. Remember, he was so horrible. I love Marcel. But then they like hair raped him and tried to shave his head. And then he became the hero of the season. So, Ronnie, then that would mean that you feel bad for the Nigerians who were going to take MJ's life. Oh, how beautiful was that?

It was cinematic joy. Now talk about a Lifetime movie. Okay, I love that all these Bravo shows have the same thing. In Vanderpump Rules and this, we have the abuse storyline. And Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. We have the abuse storyline. Then we have the alcoholism storyline and Shaws of Sunset and Beverly Hills. And just the same, MJ

is so fucked up. Oh my god. Her story about how she didn't rob a bank was just a beautiful thing to behold. With the Nigerian mafia who threatened to take her life. Like they wanted to deal with a chubby Persian girl.

It's like finally finally, the Nigerians came out of the spam email and into the bank. Well, the problem is that she probably responded to one of those emails. She is that dumb. She's like, Mother, Mother, I finally have a boyfriend. He's a Nigerian prince.

MJ's calling. I know. MJ's calling. Let me... Continue talking. Let me turn off this phone over here in my living room. Yeah, what the hell, dude? It's a landline. I actually, MJ's calling. Let me... Continue talking. Let me turn off this phone over here in my living room. Yeah, what the hell, dude? It's a landline. I actually have a landline. You still have a landline? Yeah. Oh my god, old lady. It really is... I think it really is a Nigerian.

Nigerian Prince. It's a toll-free number. Hold on. Hey, I wanted to know who that was. I wanted to hear it, too. What an anticlimactic waste of our time, Ben. Hey, Ben. Yes? You know what was hilarious? What?

How, when they were giving MJ shit about never selling a house, Reza's like, hey, the only place you sold this year is a condo on Fuller, which is where you and I live. I know. It was clearly like she like sold like to her nigerian prince boyfriend a condo in her building what was up with both of the girls being accused of having fake relationships um mj was being accused of having a fake relationship with a gay guy yeah they were all saying that the dude that she brought on like the final episode of shaz this season was actually a

undercover brother now here's my question why at what point like do that someone say hey you know what this is none of your business i mean it's our business because we're watching them but to each other like they all just they are so up in each other's business like who the fuck cares you know it's just i mean mj didn't even say that when Reza screamed out that she was just in a hotel room getting double stuffed by Jewish twins. Yeah, that was crazy. How does this guy call himself her best friend and he's yelling these things on the reunion? I don't care if he's like, I'll support her once she gets out of rehab. That's fine.

But you don't have to say these vile, nasty things. Everybody should be taking notes because you know what asa and lily you think that you're like in tight with him right now he is a dirty mustachioed snake and he will do the exact same thing to you guys too he's doing it to his boyfriend he's doing it to his boyfriend right now and he already did it to his best friend mj if you're gonna screw those two people over big time anybody is fair game and remember he was not was not very nice to Ronnie in the Target elevator. So, I mean, case closed. Well, in his defense, he was afraid.

But he was fatter and sweatier and hairier, and I was more afraid-er. Yeah. So whatever. I'm done. I'm over it. As Lisa would say, who cares? I'm over it. Any last thoughts on the reunion?

Glad it's over. Glad it's over. Glad it's over. I want to ask you guys, I mean, the show's doing well again. It's going to come back. Do you think that we're going to have any cast changes? After season one, we lost Sammy and his tragic fedora. Can Gigi still stay with this show? I mean, she kind of has to be there, right?

I could see them getting rid of Mike and bringing in a new guy, because Mike is pretty boring and he's an asshole. Well, Mike, I think they'll keep because he's hot and he's going to be in Playgirl. He's not hot. They could find another hot Persian. He's hot for that show. They could find another hot Persian. I mean, Omid is ten times hotter than Mike. Agreed.

Cosign. Yeah, me too, actually. And he's also a drama queen, so that would be fun. And he's also a queen. But, yeah, I don't think that... He's also Persian Adrian Bro yeah, I don't think that... He's also Persian Adrian Brody. I don't think they're going to keep Gigi. Because no one will shoot with her.

What if they give her an extension? A contract extension? A Gigi's extension? I just want them to show Gigi getting beat down by her sister. Get it? Gigi's extension? Yeah, got it. We got it. We got it, boo. Is anybody else on your phone?

That lack of laughter is totally intentional. Yeah, exactly. Is anybody else calling on your landline? Do you need to take a minute? I think it's Gigi. She's coming by door to door to sell extensions. That is an extremely informed lack of laughter. Okay.

A-T-L. Okay, so in Atlanta, they went, the ladies came to LA to visit Nini and they all came, they even left Raleigh behind. Raleigh. So, I mean, really the big thing here was that

Nini was like, y'all come over at nine and then they showed up at midnight. Oh, my God. We have to start way, way back. Okay, the girls come to Hollywood. Nene rents them, basically pulls a car out and calls real estate agents and gets someone to donate a rental house for them.

A beautiful rental house, too, by the way. Probably Maurice. Yeah. Beautiful home. The ladies don't even get to this house. We're shown until like 7.15 or 7.30 at night. And Nene talks her head off for another 45 minutes or whatever. And is like, welcome to Hollywood.

Now, y'all come to my home at 9. Okay, that is an hour and a half. And where does Nene live? Because she talks about how she lives in the hills, but she put the ladies up in the hills. And then they had to drive for half an hour to get to her house. Okay, Ronnie. Well, there's a lot of hills. I mean, if you live, like, over by outposts, it looked like, to me, to be honest, it looked like they were up in the Beachwood area.

And if they're in the Beachwood area and if Nene's over, like, in the Brent hills that's actually a that's a ways no nini's not in the brentwood hills nini's straight up in the hollywood hills because she drives down like gower to go to the paramount studios so they're not that far away and when they were driving around they were driving around and on sunset boulevard i mean right they didn't they did not make it very clear by any means the editing was a whack this past episode because again it's like you know these women were supposed to be at nini's house and it's not that far away and then they don't show why they're late at all and we don't know if nini has was nini calling to be like where are you guys or is she just sitting there waiting for the show up and just like stewing you know but it but it was at the end of the day it was was completely disrespectful. The women did get into LA late,

but they probably got in around like two or three. They all want to take a nap, take a shower. That's fine. But Nini said, drinks are at seven dinner as at nine. And you show up at 1145. I would say,

guess what? Bitches get out of my house. Yeah. I thought Nini, a gracious host would still let them in, but I thought Nini was totally with, within her rights to say, she was embarrassed by them. Why should she let them in

to hang out with her actual L.A. friends that have real jobs in Hollywood? I'm sorry. You don't want to bring Kenya Moore into your house around these other people. That being said, I love when Kenya was like, well, can I get a plate or something? No, that was candy.

I meant candy. That's what I meant. I love what you've done with my dining room table. Yeah. She loves a job. She's like, I furnished her home and now I can't eat. Yeah. No,

I meant, I meant candy in those tight black and white pants that made her ass look bigger than Rob Kardashians, who was pretty much going like, um, yeah, I don't care if you don't invite me and just bring me a plate of food because I'm a hungry cow.

I'm eating for two. I'm eating for me and for Riley right now. You don't got no other food? I'm real hungry right now. Me and Riley are starting. Riley's not even here. That was a beautiful, beautiful, beautiful episode

of the show. They haven't had one that good in a long time well it was like sort of like just silly and funny and um how dumb was it they went to the groundlings and of course they're like kenya do a move and everybody will copy and then she did like a tribal sexy squeal yeah um that was lame and then it was also lame when they were like kenya can you tell us all about your amazing resume your acting resume did you hear her she's like listed like every movie where she's been an extra on and i love that i love that jeremy is like uh-huh like so completely mortified that he's even on this show who was it who um the the teacher was like um oh really and what have you done? And she's like, well, girlfriends. And what else did she say? It was like, big mamas.

She's like, I work with Will Smith and Tyler Perry's like, Medea's gone to prison. She's like, I have written Christmas cards to Will Smith, Tyler Perry, Bill Cosby, Felicia Bershaw, the little girl who played rudy

denzel washington obama michelle she's just like naming every black person she can think of um she iced tea ice cube uh kenya's embarrassing to black people and humanity absolutely that was pretty fun because she supposedly she supposedly arranged that class so that she could show everyone what a good actor she was well she's a fantastic actress i mean i don't know why she hasn't gotten her at her oscar yet have we looked at her imdb page before yes i looked at i looked at the imdb page after she was like listing off all of her credentials, and I was like, oh, I don't know what any of these are. Well, let's read it right now,

shall we? Because I would love to know, and I know that that means other people would love to know. Founder of the Kenya Moore Foundation, which awards scholarship to underprivileged girls from her high school alma mater. See more trivia.. No thanks. Okay, what's she been in? Waiting to Exhale. She mentioned that a few times. The most important thing is she was in I Know Who Killed Me, the Lindsay Lohan stripper with one leg movie, as a character

named Jasmine with a Z. Oh, no. She was in a movie called Twat. She was in a movie called Cloud Nine. She was in a movie called Twat? She was in a movie called Cloud Nine and her character's name was Champagne. Oh, I bet she wasn't a stripper in the background. No, definitely not.

I know who killed me, so she totally was a stripper. She was in another movie called Hot Parts and her character's name was Passion. Wasn't a stripper in that either, I'm sure. She was in Trapped and also, i'm sure she was in trapped and also oh no she was in haitian nights and also the sea nights oh my god that won so many awards up she played a woman named nefertiti in one episode of homeboys in outer space in 1996

oh this poor thing this is embarrassing and her last thing was in, what, 2010? And it's something nobody's ever heard of. She needs to stop it. Does she know what IMDb is and that people can access it on the internet? She does not understand that. You just need to be quiet. You should brag about your pretty eyeliner. Okay, well, she wrote,

directed, and produced Haitian Nights in 2009. Clearly, we need to get us some Haitian Nights. Oh, absolutely. So on YouTube right now, looking up Haitian Nights in 2009. Clearly, we need to get us some Haitian Nights. Oh, absolutely. So on YouTube right now, looking up Haitian Nights. Successful newlyweds become the object of a powerful voodoo priest who exacts revenge for his scorned daughter.

Oh, I hate when that happens. Oh, duh. The whole entire movie is on YouTube, you guys. But listen. Ron is on YouTube, you guys. But listen. Ron, start making the homemade pizzas. You guys, go to our YouTube page, and you will find it. I'm putting it there.

We will watch that. Not our YouTube, our What Happens Facebook. We are going long, so let's move on. Do we have anything else we have to say about Atlanta before we can start trashing Top Chef? It sucks, and the whole season has sucked. All right, let's talk about the Top Chef finale, which was the single worst episode of Top Chef in the history of Top Chef. I've been telling you guys. In the history of every single Top Chef, Top Chef Masters, Top Chef Just Desserts, Top Chef Last Chance Kitchen, this was the very, very worst episode of all time.

It has soured me on this Emmy-winning franchise, which I used to love, and now I am almost on the verge of done. Even Tom Colicchio hated it. He tweeted that he didn't like the format and that it probably won't happen again. So here are the reasons why I really hated it. Aside from the fact that as has been well documented that the timing of the show

indicated who would win. That was like a huge spoiler just by looking at how much time was left. There wasn't enough time for there to be a fifth and final tiebreaker challenge. It was also, it was edited poorly. I'm sorry, it just was. Those of us who watch the Food Network see these types of shows a lot, and we know how they're done properly. And this was not a proper execution of like a live-style Iron Chef situation. Padma's narrations were awkward there was no suspense and the fact that brooke didn't get to cook a a last meal or both of them didn't get to cook a fifth course really wasn't in the spirit of the show i mean in previous finales you know when the the judges

are deliberating they always do well we first course goes to so-and-so second course goes to so-and-so but i always sort of see it as like a casual kind of rubric. It's not a strict judging thing. It's sort of like, it was so neck-and-neck, why don't we go course-by-course? So for them to do it this way, I thought was... I just thought it ruined every single thing. Ruined a great season. If they had somebody at least explaining what was going on on the

floor, like what food they were making, you know, it wasn't about the cooking. It was... We couldn't see anything that was going on and then for uh once you see there's two chefs you know what's gonna happen i mean how can anybody on cj's team win they can't yeah oh my god i was so mad when i said the brookhead cj i was like fuck this and then of course she's like don't fry these too long and the first thing he does is burn her her pig stuff yeah i mean they

can be argued that she's it's her job as a chef to know what's going on and know that those are burning the judges saw them burning and smelled them burning why didn't she you know like i get that she made a chicken wing blah blah blah but it did seem kind of rigged for kristen never should have been back in the finale in the first effing place top chef whatever what's that dumb thing called last chance kitchen we've bitched about it for weeks on end i'm still gonna bitch about it somebody should not be able to come back into the competition that late in it it is ridiculous if you come back to the maybe the final five or the final six fine but kristin never should have been there as much as i loved her leading up to her elimination, which was premature on its own.

But it's wrong. Yeah. I just wanted – I mean, I like Kristen, and I'm glad that she came back, and I'm glad that she won even. I really liked her. I just wish she had to work harder for it. Like, it seemed kind of like a toss-up that they just handed to her instead of it being i mean i think if you're coming back from the dead you really need to whoop ass it shouldn't be like well they were all mediocre so let's take kristen yeah and and the weeks before that you

know when what's his name sheldon went home like that was a toss-up too like that could have either been sheldon staying or kristen staying so it's not like she killed it brooke won that week when it was down to the final three hands down she killed them yeah yeah i think it was just all depressing ending because it was a really fun seat i mean for me it was a really fun season i really liked it it was just the the last episode was just like everything was wrong it just was it was poorly produced poorly directed poorly edited poorly shot poorly conceived poorly executed it just was it was wrong in so many ways it was stupid it was like it was it's like don't they know their audience don't they know what people tune in for why they had why are they trying to change this it's just it really bothered me yeah i think that if they'd done it well, then it could have been exciting.

I do like watching Iron Chef, and that's an interesting idea. It's an interesting way to do it. Don't mix them. Yeah, or have a challenge somewhere earlier in the season maybe. But don't – this isn't Iron Chef. We're not here to watch Iron Chef. We're here to watch Top Chef. Yeah.

Boo. Boo. Well, hopefully Brooke will get to come back again because, you know, seeing her own two restaurants and work her ass off and complain and be miserable and be miserable with a kid. It kind of would have been nice to see her get the money. But now I think that bitterness will turn her into a really good, you know, all-stars winner like Blaze. Yeah. Oh, my God. I hate Richard Blaze.

Me too. Did you guys watch L.A. la shrinks um for about 10 minutes until i killed myself yeah this is not gonna be one that i'm going to be uh i know who killed me it was me i think i'd rather watch haitian nights i'm dying to watch haitian nights now i want to watch haitian shr You guys. So it probably has better acting than LA Shrinks did. I couldn't even take the preview when that guy was like, I detest fat PayPal.

I was like, you know what? You're ugly as sin. I do not want to hear who you detest. Get out of my face. I detest your ugly, fugly, fugly face. Shut up. And the girl with the anger. I watched the whole thing. Ben, what is up with that crazy lady venus oh my god i don't like she to me is like i don't trust her as here's the thing i don't want a therapist that is willing to get down to like to be naked in

front of the camera like that's within the first 10 seconds she was in spanks in a bra yeah but you know the other one too eris dr eris, she also was in her bra and little tighty-whity, whatever you call it, bra bottom, underwear bottoms. Oh my god, what is wrong with you? I don't know. At this part of the podcast, my brain melts and I can't think of proper words. Bikini bottoms? Bikini bottoms? Explain the show like you're talking to somebody who's never seen it me um what was it so basically it's three self-absorbed wannabe actors who moonlight as therapists yeah and share way too much about their personal lives and like to get naked on screen and talk a lot about themselves and their fake degrees while pretending to help people with their problems and some of these people have

problems such as my husband's penis is too large. Yeah. I mean, but the thing is this though, that one of the, one of the patients is this like person has a problem with anger, but she's so fake. It's like,

it's, you've clearly been cast and she maybe has an anger issue, but she's been told, play it up and be crazy and scream. It just, it all, it was so fake. It was so incredibly fake.

I hope the ratings are trash. I'll see them tomorrow. This kind of crap does not deserve to be on TV when Gallery Girls has been canceled. I'm sorry. Absolutely. But haven't you noticed that Bravo has lucked into certain things? Like Top Chef they've had for a long time, right? That was a classy show from the Project Runway days back when they were still trying to be a good network.

Then Housewives was kind of lucked into, because that was just some weird little show that was not this bitch fest that it is now. It was about housewives. It was kind of boring season one. I mean... No, Joe and Slade, that's classic TV. Yeah, but it was basically just

a bunch of women just kind of being shot for the camera. You know, there was no fighting. It wasn't cattying. Half that first season was Gina washing her Mercedes in the driveway. It really was. It wasn't catty at all. Yeah. And then that turned into craziness, which they kind of leapt into after someone had their first fight on that show.

What else have they made that's good? I mean, make is total total crap it's like embarrassing losing project runway was a big blow to their system because a lot of the fashion stuff that they do is just not nearly as good yes rachel zoe has been on for quite some time but the other uh fashion shows have all failed all that shit they've done with like isaac mizrahi and my girl kelly roland that bombed um the consignment shop bombed all this stuff is bombing so it'll be interesting to see if brad gets another season because now they've bumped him down to 30 minutes it'll be interesting to see if the dukes of melrose are completely ridiculous meaning i want to watch them and wearing cloaks or if it's garbage i don't know watch that i guarantee um but you know misadvised

was a bomb around the world in 80 plates was a bomb you know, Misadvised was a bomb. Around the World in 80 Plates was a bomb. You know, I think that we already have the 2013 bomb of the year is probably L.A. Shrinks. And maybe it will be nominated for one of our awards. Watch what crappy at the end of the year. But they have had a hit in Vanderpump Rules and Shazza Sunset. That is true. So, I mean, who knows? It's just like every once in a while you get something good. But at this point, I just want Jeff Lewis back on my screen.

I miss Tabitha coffee. She has been gone for way too long, you know, but I just want them to stick with what works. I am back on the millionaire matchmaker train as crazy and stupid and embarrassing as that is. I just want Patty Stanger, Jeff Lewis, Kathy Griffin. Kathy, by the way, that show is tanking they moved it to 11 30 was doing so badly i know really yeah i know and she's and she's she's getting like really big name stars this season too and it's just it's not clicking she should have done that from the

beginning well you know what she's a good guest she's not a good hostess i'm sorry wow harsh words no i'm just saying like she plays well off of people but she plays really well off of a host like especially like a straight man host you know not like straight versus gay yeah she's the she's the entertainment she's she's not the person yeah that shit also does not need to be 60 minutes long are you kidding me is it yes oh my gosh i mean i have to watch it in like six installments because ten minutes is all I can take. I stopped watching after the first episode this season. Yeah, there's not really anybody I want to see on there.

Anyway, we all want to see The Real Housewives of Orange County. And thank God, I think it's season eight is coming back. The previews look amazing. What is happening with Vicky's face? What is happening with Vicky's face? What is happening with Vicky's brown, like, her pants? Like, the tightness of her pants? She's gotten fat. That's what that means. We saw Vicky in real life a couple months

ago, and her face looked, I mean, like a jack-o'-lantern, but like the jack-o'-lantern that we know. I mean, maybe she's just fresh from surgery when they started shooting this season, but her face looked cray. She looks like she's just been strang surgery when they started shooting this season, but her face looked cray. She looks like she'd just been strangled underwater. That's what she looks like.

All puffy. And an injector and stung by 400 bees. Yeah. Not that we're catty. She looks like when you're pressing your face up against a car window. She looks like, you know, when you have, like, a balloon animal. When you have, like, a long balloon and you need to, like, make a balloon animal. So you have a long balloon and you need to make a balloon animal. So you have to make a little small part of the balloon.

So you twist it around and you get a little balloon part that gets big and puffy. That's what her face looks like. She looks like dough before you're done kneading it. It's all pockmarky and has holes in it and you have to keep punching it to look right. She looks like an exercise ball that you're sitting on. You know, sort of like fruit. She looks like she's on the road to Mama Elsa-ville. She does.

A lot of them do. Brandi Glanville. Woo! Yeah, Brandi's starting to get Joker-esque. All right, well, we should wrap this up because we're going crazy long. Okay. So anyway. So, bye.

Anyway, um, be sure to listen to our podcast on iTunes and Stitcher and the, uh, sideshow network and, uh, like us on Facebook, facebook.com backslash or forward slash,

whatever. Watch what crappens. Matt is at life on the M list. Ronnie's at TV. Gasm. I'm at B side blog. You should follow all of us because we need more followers at all times. And you should write us a nice comment on iTunes and tell us how much you love us.

And I guess that's really it, right? Happy birthday, Eddie. Happy birthday, Eddie. Happy birthday, Eddie. And everyone else. Happy birthday to my mom. Don't let her steal Eddie's thunder. She can't listen to this show anyway.

She hates us. She's embarrassed that her son does this for a living. She is. She really, really is. Well, at least you could disappoint her on her birthday. Yeah. You're my mom.

I got you disappointment for your birthday. Enjoy. Enjoy that glass of regret cheers all right bye everyone bye guys if you like listening to comedy try watching it on the internet the folks behind the sideshow network have launched a new YouTube channel called Wait For It it's got interviews with comedians like Reggie Watts Todd Glass, Liza Schleichinger Slicing, driving friends with her

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Just go to youtube.com slash wait for it comedy. There's no need to wait for it anymore. Because it's here. And it's funny. And I love you. A few days ago, Brooke Tudine posted an inspirational quote on her wall that got 17 likes and 3 comments. Thumbs up, Brooke. Geico also wants to make a comment.

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