Watch What Crappens - #66: Kim Richards is Married to Medicine

Episode Date: March 27, 2013

Kim Richards is Married to Medicine See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

From Wondery and Audible comes Class of 88, a new podcast hosted by Will Smith. Before 1988, a lot of people didn't take hip-hop seriously. But hip-hop today touches everything from film to fashion to sports. So what changed? Follow Class of 88 wherever you get your podcasts. hey everyone welcome to watch what crap ends the podcast about all the crap we love to talk about on Bravo. I'm Ronnie Karam from TVgasm.com, and as usual, I'm with Ben Mandelger from B-Side Blog. Hello, Ben! Hi, everybody! And I'm also with Matthew Whitfield of Yahoo! Hello, Matt! Hey, boys!

You can find me at TVGay. Why are you laughing at me already? We're like four seconds in. I'm laughing because for some reason it just struck me as being so super gay. Yeah, you're like Blanche from The Golden Girls all of a sudden. As I was delivering it, it felt super gay. Well, it is the equality for all day with red stuff on Facebook. Oh, my God.

Those red squares on Facebook. I thought people were going equality for all day with red stuff on Facebook. Oh my god, those red squares on Facebook. I thought people were going communist. I was like, okay, Facebook, let's leave China out of this. I'm already over my profile picture and it's going back to something sexy tomorrow. Oh, I can't wait to change it back.

Plus, it's totally making Facebook stalking impossible. How are you supposed to look up someone if all you see is a sea of red and pink dashes? I know. Good. Marriage is going to fail and America is going to turn into a communist country. Mark my words. But anyway, before we get started, you can find me, Ronnie, at TVgasm on Twitter.

You can find Matt at Life on the M-List. And you can find Ben at B-Side Blog. We're also on Facebook at Facebook.com slash watch what crappens. I mean, yeah, is that right? No, facebook.com slash watch what crappens. And, yeah, I guess that's it. So come on to Facebook and talk some shit with us because you guys are leaving some really funny stuff on there.

And we'll be talking about a lot of that stuff today in the podcast. A few other things. I want to start off with why did your face disappear from our facebook page because now it says photos follow ben on instagram follow matt on instagram where the fuck are you okay because i'm like an old grandma trying to learn the computer still i bitch i thought you were trying to be all like stealth like i'm hiding it i don't want to show you know my life on here and i'm like what's up i'm too too good for this watch what crap is Facebook page. No, it's because I've gained 100 pounds

and I'm embarrassed for people to see my face. No, it's because I finally got on Instagram because you guys are on Instagram and your little things on there are Instagram links and mine was a Twitter link, which I mean, who cares? I don't say anything on Twitter. So I was trying to change it to Instagram and I couldn't figure out how to do it and I

accidentally erased mine. So, well, when don't you put my Instagram up there? Oh, I don't know how the fuck to do that. Since I was the one, the architect of these little things, I will add it on tomorrow when I'm on a show. Who was the architect of the most glamorous cover photo ever that says Checkmate Bitch starring Lisa Vanderpump? Who put that up? That was me. Amazing. Because I do same-day recaps over at TVgasm.com.

So I was doing that anyway, and I died when she said that. So I figured I should put that up on the book. God, you plug your website almost more than Ben plugs his A-list friend list. Oh, my god, yeah. I wish I had celebrity to mention. Todd English was on my plane to New York, you guys. Wow.

TV Chasm has day of recaps of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and ReDev, so come on over. I have a legitimate name drop that folds into the mission of this podcast. I was tweeted at last night, or two nights ago, of this podcast. I was tweeted at last night, or two nights ago, without any problem. I did not know

where this came from initially, but by our very own, our very favorite, Kim Richards. I know, I'm kind of dying. So, what happened was, one of our listeners, Wendy Shaw, tweeted a photo of Escape to Witch Mountain at Kim Richards but also included me on the tweet.

So I had no idea this was happening because I hadn't checked in. Because you're lazy and she did the work for you. Exactly. And so then I go onto Twitter to look at my at replies and all of a sudden I see Kim Richards and the best part is that she replied to both of us but the best part was that to me it made zero sense which in turn made it make the most sense of all.

Turtles! So here's what she wrote. Okay everyone I'll tell you when it's over. Okay Kim Richards says at Wendyann99 at bsideblog aww! So cool! Okay, Kim Richards says, at Wendyann99, at B-Side Blog, aww! So cool!

Cool in caps, exclamation point, exclamation point. Emoji of the Earth, emoji of a shooting star, and then, looks kind of like my Starbucks, exclamation point, question mark. Huh? Question mark. Ha ha. Do they have emojis for Vicodin and Klonopin and Hillbilly heroin? Let me tell you something, you guys.

Spray paint cans. When I saw that tweet, I was convinced I was looking at a Kim Richards parody account. I was like, oh, who is this joker? This is like Alexis Bolino, you know? Nope, that's a fish. This was the real deal Kim Richards saying, aw, so cool. Looks like my kind of Starbucks, huh? I've since learned that Starbucks is a reference to something on Escape to Witch Mountain, which then prompted me to look up Race to Witch Mountain with The Rock. And if you do a search for that on Google, it shows a cast list.

It shows The Rock and the three other current stars. And then there's a picture of Kim Richards. And it's like this 1971 little Kim Richards, six years old, pigtails picture next to The Rock, and it's the funniest juxtaposition. I'm looking at that right now. It's actually a super adorable picture. She's like a six-year-old child with pigtails and a beer in her

hand. I mean, that is cute. I heard, though, that, not that I would watch a movie with The Rock in it, but I did hear that she has a cameo in the more recent one starring The Rock. Yeah, that's why she was on the cast list. Hey, you're The Rock? I've snorted you so many times. Thanks for all the

good nights. Woo! I escaped to The Rock Mountain and The Rock is talking. I'm in a movie with a mountain, about a mountain, and the race is great. Don't tell Kyle. Don't try and put me in a hospital. Somebody needs to make

a photo of instead of crashing into Shut Up Mountain, it's Kim crashing into a mountain of cocaine. And then having to escape it with a Starbucks. Yes, exactly. With a Starbucks cup in her hand and the rock, you know. A Starbucks. Starbucks is the actual...

Well, she could have a Starbucks and a Starbucks. Yeah, that's what I was getting at. She would still have a Starbucks coffee cup in her hand. And she wouldn't know the difference between each... And you know there'd be wine in that Starbucks, by the way. As learned at the airport. Can we talk some gossip? Because there is a lot of shit before we get into Atlanta

and Married to Medicine, Beverly Hills, and the reunion. I have lots to discuss. Well, sure. And today, the big thing on Facebook when we're recording this is that it's all about marriage equality. So I think in gay news, Matt, I'm assuming you have some gossip coming from Atlanta and some divorce that might be happening. Ooh, girl. Ooh, girl. See how I put that in?

You know, even when you're on the East Coast, I just, you know, I should never underestimate you. Okay, everybody, so the big news that came out today is that Cordell Stewart... Came out today! Well, yeah, he should have come out today, too, and said that he's been in a romance with Walter. But anyway, Cordell came out today and actually filed divorce papers, and he is divorcing our beloved Portia. Yes, and I'm reading about this on Us Weekly, and it says that Portia is disappointed because she had held off from filing because Mr. Stewart promised to work on the marriage with her instead he misled her

and she found out about the filing in the media come on now that is just wrong it's always the wife who's the last to know right oh well especially when your husband's on the down low we should write a fucking song this should be a candy uh burris this could be her next album her next song her next single well the rumor, and it's not a rumor that I'm starting, but it's a rumor that I read on the Internet, which, if you guys don't know, is the best book ever written, other than the Bible, possibly. Yeah. And I read that he is leaving her for, like, straight out of his teens, hermaphrodite, which someone in the comment section of that article got very offended and said, it's not hermaphrodite, it's intersexed, which I've never heard of. So if there's any hermaphrodites out there who need to be called intersex, that is fine. But that makes me think

of that unit store where everything was just, what do you call that? Where it's not a man or it's not a woman? Unisex. Unisex. Yeah. Like when people pee in the same bathroom. I'm not saying intersex. Wait, I have a question. Are you saying that Cordell Stewart left Portia for a hermaphrodite slash intersex slash unisex being? I am saying that Cordell is leaving Portia for somebody made at Unix. No, I don't know.

I'm not saying that. I'm just saying I read it on the internet. Does this person have a Starbucks? I'm not sure. And you know what? God bless him. If he is leaving her for a Hermie, then that's great.

I just hope that Hermie doesn't ever want to leave the house. A Hermit Hermie? Yeah. Well, if the rumors are correct, we know that Cordell is not into star boxes, if you know what I'm talking about. He's not into box at all. He's into books.

He's into the box. He's into man ass. Anyway, the funny thing is, not the funny thing, and that wasn't even funny what I just said. I'm dumb. I was laughing because I'm just in a great mood. Are you high like Kim Richards? I'm high. Well, you know what? I'm feeling the vibes of her Starbucks. Okay, enough with Starbucks. So Portia, though, was on Watch

What Happens a few nights ago, and they asked about this. And she just was like, yeah, everything's fine. I mean, obviously, you brush it off and you never tell Andy Cohen the truth. But, you know, what do you guys think now? I think this secures her a place on the next season. Well, I would love it if next season she's bitter and being like, well, he's gay anyway. I would find him, like, making out with guys, like, 145 days a year. That's like three years worth. Yeah. I just turned her into, like, Audrey 2.

Sorry. I'm okay with that. Yeah. I just turned her into Audrey, too. Sorry. I'm okay with that. Sorry, my impersonations are going to be way off tonight, because I'm in my parents' house. I don't want to be too loud and wake them up and confuse them. So everything's going to be real strange over here. Oh, that's okay. Hey, you know, I have to carry

around hand wipes, because he's always making me use my fingers in nasty places. And I thought that was normal, because I saved myself from marriage. Well, never again. I ain't gonna be a virgin until marriage. Never again. Did we lose Matt? Yeah, Matt. No, I'm here. I'm just, as soon as

you say, as soon as you say, like, what did you say? Hand wipes? I just kind of got upset and nervous, and was just waiting to see where it was going. He saw red and then he saw pink and then thought of Cordell. And then I thought of Rothko. And then his vagina

10-step. I'm not trying to offend you, Herms. Everybody, I accept you if you have a penis and a vagina, a penis or a vagina, a vagina and a penis, a peen-gina. Wasn't Jamie Lee Curtis born with both?

That was the rumor. That's the rumor. That's the rumor. We have not verified that, but we can send Cordell in to do some research. Maybe he needs to take some Activia. That's the last thing I want to see is Cordell with the shits. Because you know he'd be like, oh, I got the shits again. Wow, I don't know where this show is going tonight.

I would just like to say that we're starting this much later than usual and we're all on drugs. Yeah. No, I really am. What do you want? What do you want, sweetie? Let's talk. Well, you know, I have like all that metal up in my arms. And I sometimes get kidney stones.

So sometimes they prescribe me some things. Oh my god, you're still coming... You're like Kim still, coming up with diseases to get pills. I know, I broke my arm like six years ago and had it repaired with metal and they still write me prescriptions. It's amazing. He's cleaning mirrors in other people's homes now. Oh,

I am. Okay, so I have a ton of other gossip. So, Portia, do we care? Do we think she's back next season? Anybody? Anybody? I'm going to move on. I love her.

I hope she's back next season. And the Housewives ruins everybody's lives. Except for candies, for some reason. Okay, a few other quick notes. We just hit 1,200 likes on our Facebook page. Amazing. Yay, everybody! But we have not received any new comments on our Facebook page. Amazing. Yay, everybody! But

we have not received any new comments on the iTunes page in a week, and I'm getting very upset. Yeah, we're looking at you, Eddie McGee. Eddie McGee! We've maxed out at 300, and I need more. Okay, but what's the gossip? Come on, now.

Okay, so the gossip is that Lisa Renna is in the running to join the cast of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills now that Adrienne has officially been booted. Discuss. Slash, before you discuss, I'm obsessed with her. Well, I don't know if I'd ever say I'm obsessed with Lisa Renna. But I think it would be a good mix. I mean, but she's so valley.

It's hard for me to imagine her mixing up. Where the fuck do you think Kim Richards lives? She's fucking out in like a ranch. Yeah, but Kim's a hobo. Like, that's why we like her. I don't want to see Lisa Rinna being all poor and making everybody go to the NoHo Arts District for coffee. She's not

poor. Her store is on Ventura Boulevard. It's right over the hill, bitch. She's going to be dragging these women into the valley. We don't want that. No, it's too hot there. Kim will get so hot that she'll have to take something. Then Brandi will embarrass her and ruin her life on national TV.

The valley is closer than all those hoes that live in Malibu. Like, Camille Grammer lives six hours out of Beverly Hills. Yeah, but it's prettier in Malibu. Yeah. And let me tell you all the reasons why I love Lisa Rinna. Number one, her lips are bigger than Taylor Armstrong's.

Okay. Number two, she starred as an amazing villainess on Melrose Place, and her name was Kyle McBride, and she was super hot and trashy. Okay. She's married to Harry Hamlin. Boo, boo, boo, boo.

I can't get on board with that one. Gross, gross. Why not? Gross. That guy looks like a payless shoe that got thrown in an oven. She was amazing on various seasons of The Celebrity Apprentice. And she was also the enemy of Star Jones. She's the enemy of Star Jones.

That alone. My enemy is my friend you poor young people let me tell you boys something that you don't know lisa rena was the original billy on days of our lives she was i was getting there okay i used to watch that every day i used to skip school to come home and watch that i used to record that shit on VHS tapes. I loved it. She was so good. And then when she left, they got this bimbo who was dating George Clooney. And I'm still upset with her.

She had these big double D boobs and she was a terrible actress. And I've been mad at Lisa Rinna ever since she left Days of Our Lives. And every time I'm like, you know what, Lisa Rinna, I'll forgive you and watch your show with you and Harry Hamlin.

I'm like, nope, still hate you. You were much better as a bad soap opera actress than a reality star bad actress hate you hate her yeah i hope she gets her by a car i hope she doesn't get on she's too low rent and she's already ruined enough bad tv shows look at the rest of this motherfucking cast you have taylor armstrong who has no money she doesn't have a pot to piss and you have kim the hobo. And then you have Brandi who also is Poe White trash. So why can't you have Lisa Rinna who at least has $4 million in the bank and lives in the valley? Listen, if you're going to go with a known name, why Lisa Rinna? Can't you shoot a little higher? Yeah, exactly. Okay, then who are you going to get?

Leanne Brimes. Yes, and to your point, Kim is on because she's a wreck. Taylor is on because she's killed a husband. She's killed a husband, and now she's about to kill another one who was someone else's husband. Brandi is a piece of white trash who's causing trouble all over the place. Lisa Renna is not going to do anything except make up silly scenes about, oh, look at me trying to make pancakes. It's so hard being a wife. If I were in

the same room with you right now, I would punch you in the face. With that metal arm, I'm so scared. I would crush that arm like tinfoil. Bitch! Ben, oh my god, you better step in between. I am stepping in between, and I'm gonna say this is who I would like to see.

It's not a celebrity, but I think what I would really like on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills would be some sort of like 45-year-old tiger mom Asian lady who's like type A and crazy and a bitch. Like Janice Min who runs Us

Weekly? Yes, or what I imagine Lucy Liu is like. Oh my god, Lucy Liu. Only if it's Lucy Liu in her character from Kill Bill. Yeah, or like Yoko. Yoko ain't busy. She needs to do something. Like, wouldn't you love it?

Wouldn't you love it if there was some, like, austere Asian woman who spends the entire time just looking down her nose at these women and being just an uber bitch I want it to be Yoko Ono and then she can come up and break up the gang and then there could be a photo of like Yoko naked curled up along the side

of like Kyle Richards in like the Ode to Rolling Stone cover shoot who's Yoko? Oh, jeez. Sorry, he doesn't have a boutique on Pearl Boulevard. Sorry, I was born in the 80s, not the 1800s.

You were born in the 80s? I'm horrified. Is that true? Yeah. Okay, moving on. Shut up. Everybody shut up. Ronnie is slitting his inner thigh right now. I know. Okay. We're going to talk about the shows, but I have one other thing.

I posted this on Facebook earlier or last week or something. What do you guys think about the fact that Brad is doing better in the ratings than Rachel Zoe? This excites me. This is like learning that Succotash is more popular than Green Peas. You know, it's like blah. Fuck you. It's like brown poop is less smelly than green peas. You know, it's like, blah. Fuck you. It's like brown poop is less smelly than green poop. Hey, let's talk about this Brad Goreski.

Okay, this is, Brad Goreski is the reason that nobody wants gay people to get married. No one wants you in their church, Brad Goreski. Or the creepy husband. Yeah. And also, speaking of those ratings, they're both pretty low, aren't they? I mean, they're both pretty far under a million.

Is that good? Rachel dropped significantly. I mean, she was normally like around 900,000, but she's down in the shitter about 500,000 this season. Brad's doing about 600,000, and that means danger for both of them. Oh, those are some bad ratings. But I can see why. Brad, I tried to watch, couldn't do it, made me crazy. Rachel Zoe is hilarious, and I can't believe I haven't been watching that the whole time yeah oh i'm sorry

she went to fashion week in paris and she was at some fashion show where everybody was coming up and down an escalator and she's like last year you remember last year in the finale when kate moss came off a carousel and i said where do you go from a carousel? You know where you go from carousels? Escalators. Oh, my God. That's what the whole show is like. I mean, but the thing is this, though. Rachel Zoe, that show has become so much less entertaining

because they've whittled away all the interesting side characters, so now it's her and whiny Raj. I still watch it. I'm two episodes behind, unfortunately, as with all my TV. But the drop in the ratings, I blame Raj for that because there's too much... Is the baby a doll

robot or is it a real live thing? Sky? Sky Sky? Or Sky Sky? There's always time for Sky Sky. There's always time. Oh my god. Let's go on the carousel. Oh my god. It's moving. It's going in circles. I can't go in circles.

Stop. Make a stop. Just go in one circle. Make a stop. I can't do this. Oh my God. There are horses on here. Why do they put horses on a circle?

I can't believe it. There are horses. Oh my God. Why is it moving up and down? Horses don't move up. This is ridiculous. Stop it. Are we in a race?

Are we in a race? Raj, who's coming in first? Oh my God. I'm dying right now. Did we get the trifecta, Raj? Okay. I have one other thing and then we're moving on um sorry to break it up um so kathy griffin we all know her show still exists kathy with an exclamation point or whatever on bravo they moved it to a shitty time slot on

friday it's bombing even though she's getting a list uh stars today the rumor was she was in new york taping a pilot to do a talk show on CNN that's comedy and entertainment and news based with Anderson Cooper because their New Year's Eve specials are so successful. What do you think of that? I think, you know, I would think that would be a little better than what she's doing now because she really is best when she's playing off of someone and not the hostess. So if she's doing something with someone that she already has

known chemistry with, then sure. But I don't know if I want to tune in to watch a talk show on CNN. Well, Anderson can't keep a talk show going and Kathy can't keep a talk show going. It's like no one in Hollywood really understands math.

Two wrongs do not make a right. You know who needs a talk show? Lisa Renna. Oh, my God. Oh, look, I can't make eggs. I'm so silly. Oh, my God. Look like Caterpillar on tight jeans and bedazzled T-shirts.

You know what? I'm going to admit this. She is more Orange County in her fashions. She is. She loves a bedazzled florida lee on the ass of her jeans and she loves a big like faux rusted um rooster that would be sitting on her uh island in her kitchen and she and she has like what i like to call the human resources haircut which is like the little short perk thing that women do

with the little wings on the side. She started that shit. They all followed in her steps. It's like the quick and efficient mom slash human resources haircut. Yeah, totally. Yeah, you just tussle it dry. I like that description, human resources haircut. I like that.

No offense to people. Okay, we've wasted about 75 minutes talking about nothing, and I've already cursed way too many times. That one lady that keeps complaining about me cursing, she's really mad at us. Who is that? God. Some person on iTunes says that we curse too much.

Oh, curses. We do. We do. We do. Okay, well, let's move on to the Beverly Hills main event. Why don't we talk about the dumb shit on Atlanta and Married to Medicine, and then we'll get to the good stuff. Or do you want to start with the good stuff? I want to talk this Atlanta. I want to talk what Matt said. I'll go with Matt. I vote Matt.

I vote Matt and communism. That is a first. Sure. Let's talk about Atlanta. Or we could do, I also enjoy, is talking about Lisa Rinna, because they're both as entertaining to me as Lisa is. Oh my god, I hate both of you. Yoko should come break us up. Okay, Real Housewives of Atlanta. The episode

started, we're back at Candy's double house mansion in the ghetto. And we start off with our, come on, just give me some Mama Joyce and then we'll move on. Go. You sound like Jack K. Harry getting run over by a car.

Ooh, Bentley to the car. Hey, Jack K. Harry just got killed outside your house, Candy. That's wrong, Candy. Can your boy just run over Jackade? I didn't want to tell Riley to look out the road because Jackade just got run over. Riley, look away. Riley, your friend Jackade, she got ran over. Riley, look away. Riley, your friend Jack Kay, she

got run over. I hope you don't take the news too hot, Riley. Does Riley like 227? Of course Riley likes 227. She probably stares at it confusedly like she does everything else. Are kids off limits because Riley looks gifted? She has a

poster of Calvin up on her wall. You know that. Riley, what are you doing with that Calvin photo? I think she's more into Lester, actually. Oh, wow. Mary, I'm tired. Oh, my God. Let me tell you, the best block on TV ever

Was 227 followed by Amen followed by Golden Girls Followed by Emptiness followed by Sisters I am the gayest person ever Absolutely Matt and followed by half an hour of local news Followed by Saturday Night Live Followed by Star Search Oh my god

We had Showtime at the Apollo in New York We didn't have Star Search after SNL. We got the real. We had amateur night. Wow. Okay, so we're at this party at Candy's house, and she sits Kenya down, and she tells Kenya that Walter's there. And then Kenya freaks out, and then Candy starts laughing. Then Kenya gets pissed.

Then she starts saying that, like, well, I didn't bring security. Do normal people in Atlanta go with security wherever they go? Yeah, because all those crazy stalkers from Kenya's YouTube movies are so in love with her. Oh my god, by the way, I have watched that movie, The Haitian Whatever Nightmare,

about five times in full on YouTube. Haitian Nightmare, is that what it was? We posted that on Facebook. It's called something like that, right? Yeah, it was. Haitian Nightmare, is that what it was? We posted that on Facebook. We posted the full movie. I think it was called Haitian Nights. Wasn't it called Haitian Nights? Not Haitian Nightmare. Yeah, I think there's a part one and part two.

I love the section. Wow, that was a lot of dogpiling. You guys, let me say this. The new Tyler Perry movie that's coming out this Friday, I think it's called Temptation, looks like it was probably produced by Kenya. It's that low bunch. Oh, my God.

I love that their big moment in that preview is showing Kim Kardashian saying, The biggest thing in social media since the guy who made Facebook? And I love that we've seen it eight million times because they play it on the only two shows on TV with black people. Yeah. Well, I also watch Scandal, so I guess it's right there. The three shows with black people. I am a voting

member on the Golden Raspberry Awards, and I will be already voting for Kim Kardashian. I'm not even joking that I have plans to see it this weekend. Oh, I want to go. It looks good. Yeah. I'm totally excited. I'm going to a 21 plus screening where I can drink my face off

to deal with it. Do you know, at my Passover Seder tonight, since there's a tendency for politics to dominate the conversation, my cousin and I came up with a plan

and we said, anytime politics comes up, we're going to start talking about Tyler Perry's temptation. And we did and it totally worked and kept politics out of the conversation.

Grill against. Can you believe it well i can't believe it because tyler perry is another reason that people don't want gay marriage yes well obviously atlanta was really great because we're sitting here talking about tyler perry yeah okay okay let's get to the point okay phaedra knew that walter was going to be there but she didn't tell anybody and people thought that was a little scandalous but hello phaedra hates kenya so why the fuck does she need to tell her shit and they're also not in sixth grade yeah that atlanta was kind of stupid agreed i mean was there anything we need to even discuss on atlanta kenya kenya's making relationships for airtime she's calling Walter a stalker.

My favorite moment was like five minutes in where she's like trying to bust out and then they cut to the valet and they're like, she is dramatic as a motherfucker. Yeah, yeah. Like I actually wrote that down in my notebook. That was the direct quote. She is dramatic as a motherfucker. I loved it. I think my favorite part of the episode was when Candy had some sort of event for everyone who'd be doing her candy-coated

night sex talks or whatever. Oh, yes, her dildo Avon company. And she gets up there and starts crying about like, you know, you guys have made this all happen, and oh my god, I can't believe how far we've come. And I started to think to myself, she's crying over dildos, basically.

Yeah, I mean, we're basically looking... Yeah, we're basically staring at believe how far we've come and i started to think to myself she's crying over dildos basically yeah yeah i mean we're basically maybe small yeah we're basically staring at 200 fat ladies who jerk off a lot that's what i kept thinking i was like there is a that must it must smell like a woman's ass up in that conference center to boris kojo they they prayed up stay prayed up. I said, prayed up, Riley. And I love her.

We are gonna take over the world. Come on now, it's a dildo. You can do it yourself with a cucumber in your hand. Shut up. Oh my god, I'm eating cucumber right now as you say that. Well, then you should know. I'm slurping it down. Riley, stop that.

No, can I, please, I need some, Riley, stop that. No, I... Can I get some Mama Joy, Scott? Get to your room, Riley. And don't you be doing any candy-coated knots up there either, Riley. Why are you eating the dildo, Matthew? God made those to stick inside of you until you find a horse. That is wrong. Do you think you find a horse that is wrong. Yeah.

Do you think her just goes Yeah. Candy's vibrator sounds like No. She comes above all the haters. Why is that so offensive? She comes above all the haters. Oh. Why is that so offensive?

I don't know. It actually gave me an image of her somehow shooting something from her badge. Oh, my God. Okay. Stop. I can't hear that. I cannot hear that. Uncle.

99.9% of our listeners are women. They're probably all dying right now. And I have to apologize. My cousin, another cousin of mine at the Seder, she was like, you know, Ben, I've been listening to your podcast. And, you know, what you started to say about Stassi and the women at Sur was sort of crossing the line. I was like, oh. What did you say? That they're horrible monster bitches? I think she took offense to the fact that we used the C word.

No, no, no, no. To clarify, the only person to use the C word and that we No, no, no, no. To clarify, the only person to use the C word is you. Excuse me? I proudly say it when it comes to saucy. I'm sorry. But I think actually she was more like you guys were talking about how like

fatness and all that stuff really badly and I was like, you know, she does sort of have a point. We were really obnoxious. so I want to apologize. Why the hell are our Facebook numbers going through the roof? And you know what? Listen, I'm a fat person, and I'm allowed to talk about fat people. And we all struggle with our weight, and we're all basically women inside,

and that's why we talk about it. Because it's annoying to see other women out there being bitches about it and basing their entire lives on how skinny they are. Fuck you. And if that's not okay to talk about or listen to, then I'm guessing that your cousin is probably fat. Sorry, she's probably listening right now. But listen to me, cousin.

Stop being so defensive and stop worrying about being fat. You're beautiful how you are. If you need to hate anybody, it's not us. It's those skinny bitches trying to ruin your life by getting all the men because they're skin and bones. You know what? She is beautiful, and you know what? She's probably mad at us now for something else because she told me she likes to listen to the podcast

while she cooks, and we just had a whole long talk about Candy's vibrators and things ejecting from her. That makes me hungry. That does not make me repulsed. That makes me hungry. I'm hungry and thirsty right now. Ew. I hope she's not using zucchinis. And I'm very sorry

for yelling at your cousin. I love you, cousin. Thanks for listening. Speaking of zucchini, did you guys see in the background the synergy? NeNe has the Top Chef cookbook in her house. Did anybody pay attention to that? NeNe has more free shit in her house than Kyle Richards.

She has more free shit in her house than Kyle Richards. She has more free shit up her cooch than Phaedra after a candy-coated night's party. Hey, who posted the link to Phaedra's reviews on Amazon? Okay. So I couldn't follow it because I was reading it on my cell phone. So tell me, was that just the worst review or were they all terrible? It was one of the bad reviews it was sort of one of these things where there were a bunch of bad reviews a bunch of good reviews i didn't bother with the good reviews the bad reviews all said that it was legs only and it was boring and the music was bad and it was slow and it was

repetitive and it's mainly like it's it's really a workout for men but it seems to be targeted towards women and phadra does nothing except introduce the beginning and it's really a workout for men, but it seems to be targeted towards women. And Phaedra does nothing except introduce the beginning. And it's supposed to be basically shoddy and a ripoff. Okay, but here's the real question. Would our users like to see us on video trying it and then we'll post it on Facebook? Comment now. I would totally do it. I mean, Ben, can we take a break from PX90 and whatever the hell it's called and, like, do this one day?

I'll come over and do it. Absolutely. Let's do it. Let's do it. Let's get our – Who's going to buy it for us, hint, hint, listeners? Phaedra. Phaedra.

I think someone has to buy it. I'm not putting any money towards it. I don't even know what you all – you talk about exercise. I just go away. Right now I'm looking at a picture someone posted of adrian maloof in um underwear which okay so let me tell you about that my cousin's trying to cook why are you saying these things ronnie adrian maloof was at perez hilton's 35th birthday party which was pajama themed the other night at the el rey in los angeles and and she showed up in some sky-high heels,

fishnet stockings that went above her knee, this little, like, corsety thing and a robe, and I'm like, bitch, you are old. Stop. That's why he divorced her. I mean, how could you stay married to someone who dresses like that to bed? It's like going to sleep with a Rocky Horror Picture Show every single night.

I would rather have sex with Tim Curry than Adrian Maloof. Fair enough. I'm going to guess. Only if he's dressed as Mr. Body because you know that's who his character secretly was in the movie

Clue, the best movie ever, 1985, Madeline Kahn, RIP. I love Madeline Kahn. Pardon me, is everybody there? Because if everybody's there, I'd like to thank you all for coming to my wedding.

I'd appreciate you going even more. I mean, you're messing with us about the things to do and not a word of this. Remember, Paul, you know the man I'm going to marry, but I'm not because I wouldn't ruin anyone as wonderfully i'd like to thank you all for coming to my wedding i'd appreciate you going even more i mean you mess with us better things to do not a word of this well remember paul you know the man i'm gonna marry but i'm not because i wouldn't ruin anyone as wonderfully as well i thank you all for the gifts and the flowers thank you all but it's back to the showers thank you all but i'm not getting married today that is like the equivalent of when matt and i started talking about sports this is me being like oh ronnie's having a theater moment

i honestly don't know what that was was that like ronnie like the equivalent of my super bowl and Ronnie's like, what? This is me being like, oh, Ronnie's having a theater moment. I honestly don't know what that was. Was that like Ronnie, the equivalent of my Super Bowl? Was that like Ronnie's Super Bowl? I think Ronnie had a strip. That was Madeline Kahn singing at a Stephen Sondheim concert. She sang that song from Company and I still go on YouTube and watch it. It's brilliant

and I'll post it on our Facebook page. She is amazing. And I'll tell you what's not amazing is Atlanta. Because now we're talking about Madeline. Nothing else happened except that. You guys, I love. My favorite part of this show is you and Matt's little segues. Yeah.

It's my favorite part every week. I love doing them. So, okay. Then what I was about to say was not a segue so now i feel pressure i was about to say great segue matt oh i hate you all okay so cynthia was then suggesting that kenya may be lying and it sounded like cynthia was kind of secretly maybe they're all secretly team walter what's up slash i don't give a fuck i don't know why i asked you did you notice that that um that conversation happened at Bar One, the hottest night spot

in all of Atlanta? Does Peter run that? What did you say? Does Peter run that? Well, he doesn't so much run it as he just creates magic there, because it's Bar One. I mean, it's the place where all the who's who's of Atlanta go to.

I never see any things there. Okay. Well, I guess we don't care about part one. I don't like dead air, you guys. You just ruined the show. I quit. I'm leaving. Actually, I'm sorry.

I was looking at Madeline Kahn on YouTube, and it's now on the Facebook page. Okay, stop it, Ronnie. You always get sidetracked, Ronnie. Sorry. Lead us into the next. Lock up your dog and put away the Madeline Kahn. Okay, it's on the page. I feel okay now.

So what now? Because you know what? You notice that people on the Facebook page are starting to say, Ronnie, you don't talk enough. That is not people. That is one person. And I think that sometimes people get our voices confused. Do you pay her? No one gets our voices confused.

I think they do because I feel like i talk a lot but you talk when i prompt you to do funny voices but you need more ronnie sometimes you do disappear well sometimes i get bored and start staring off into space it's not you guys it's that i i think i suffer from some kind of disease where i can't pay attention i don't want to say adhd or abhd i don't want to have a disease. I think if I say it out loud, then it'll be true. You know, all these medical quandaries that you have

make me think about another Bravo show. Oh, Ben, you made me look terrible. I'm going to rock and roll tonight. Okay, so here's the thing. By the way, when we do this late at night, it is a fucking mess.

I love it. I'm having a blast. It's almost 1 a.m. my time, and I have all sorts of Seder in me. Is that one of Andy's toys? The Seder vibrator? Yeah, it feels like matzah.

Did you guys see the picture of Andy Collins' boyfriend posted on our Facebook, yes or no? No. Oh, my God, yes. Slash, Andy Cohen has been on vacation in Miami with the hockey player Sean Avery, who I'm obsessed with, who's actually straight but has appeared a lot on Watch What Happens. Oh, my God, but Andy's boyfriend. Slash, the rumor was that Andy was at south by southwest and had his assistant parading really young boys in front of him to pick which one he was going to take home that night so i guess they're they're having some kind of an open sale kind of a relationship oh i'm gonna get good

okay married to medicine is a fucking wreck it's produced by the same people who produce atlanta and the ratings are through the roof. It almost hit 2 million viewers slash it's already been renewed. Well, it's right after... Wait, was it after Atlanta or was it after Dev Hills? Yes, they pair them together with Atlanta. It's the perfect combo.

Everybody's leaving BET and running to Bravo. It's happening, people. BET is still a thing. Academy is a new scripted podcast that follows Ava Richards. Played by HBO's happening, people. B-E-T is still a thing. Academy is a new scripted podcast that follows Ava Richards, played by HBO's Industries' Myhala Herald, a brilliant scholarship student who has to quickly adapt to her newfound eat-or-be-eaten world. Ava's ambitions take hold and her small-town values break

in hopes of becoming the first scholarship student to make The List, Bishop Gray's all-coveted academic top 10, curated by the headmaster himself. But after realizing she has no chance at The List on her own, she reluctantly accepts an invitation to a secret underground society that pulls the strings on campus life and academic success. If she bends to their will,

she'll have everything she's ever dreamed of. But at what cost? Academy takes you into the world of a cutthroat private school where power, money, and sex collide in a game of life and death. Follow Academy on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can binge all episodes of Academy early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus. From Wondery, this is Black History for Real. I'm Francesca Ramsey. And I'm Conscious Lee.

What do most people think about when they hear the words Black History? Rosa Parks, Reconstruction, MLK, February, Black History Month. Exactly, exactly. There are so many stories of black history that we just are not really talking about or thinking about, especially outside of February. And we are about to flip the script on all of that. Because on this show, you're going to hear a little less. In August 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue. And a little bit more. She is a heroine to some.

As a fighter for black rights, she is a heroine to some as a fighter for black rights she is a villain to others follow black history for real on the wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts listen everywhere on february 5th or you can listen early and ad free on wondery plus starting january 29th join wondery plus on the wondery app or on apple podcasts really i'm not being sarcastic. I didn't think that that was even still around. They still got Jet 2? How do we live in this

world and we're still so segregated? You know, the... I don't like this. I'm gonna go to B... I'm gonna go watch BET now. Alright. Now, while you go watch that, I'm gonna say that with all the Passover madness here in my household, I did not get a chance to watch Married to Medicine beyond ten minutes. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

You have fucking homework, Ben. I know. I watched Beverly Hills and the reunion, but the DVR is in my parents' room, and I only had, like, a certain amount of time to get in there and watch TV. You rich white Jews only have one DVR? My parents are very adverse to certain types of technology. Ben, you are not acting like a doctor's wife. You have not watched the show

that is very unlike a doctor's wife of yours. Am I acting like a common whore? You need to learn to behave like a doctor's wife. Are you both being Carrie, who is clearly my favorite? And not just because she's the only whitey. I promise. Well, we all pick the Barbie we look the most like, don't we?

You want to look like her? Are you crazy? She looks crazy. She looks like a red-haired sweatshirt from Miami. Speaking of which, Matt, I have to say something. Since you just mentioned Miami and since we're talking about doctors, as we were talking, I just read that Dr. Karen Sierra is leaving real housewives of Miami. No!

I hate this news. I hate it. You guys, this is totes crazy because Miami is now shooting because they've all been at like I don't know if it was Fashion Week Miami which is fake bullshit but like they've been seen out and about the cast and they're shooting before New York which is still not in production yet but oh my

god if Karen is not part of it I've got some New York rumor from a friend who's editing a reel one of my friends is you love all this friends of friendship. We're so full of shit on this show, by the way. But this is true. A friend of a friend is an editor who is

putting together a sizzle reel or whatever you call it for an audition tape for New York. It's for this woman who's in talks and final negotiations or whatever to be one of the New York ladies and they have her doing some kind of tape. The rumor is that if they don't decide by the end of the

week which is this week that they're not going to come back they're considering getting rid of New York altogether according to this dude that's crazy no way I don't believe it for a fucking second it's the second highest rated after Atlanta Bravo can't lose it no yeah I agree

bullshit also another rumor from this article about Dr. Karen Sierra and then we'll get It's the second highest rated after Atlanta. Bravo can't lose it. No. Yeah, I agree. Bullshit. Also, another rumor from this article about Dr. Karen Sierra, and then we'll get back to Married to Medicine, is that Marisol has been downgraded from full-time housewife to a friend of the housewives. Shut up! I can't handle this shit, Ben. Well, I wouldn't want you to have a heart attack. Luckily, we have doctors on staff in Atlanta. Back to Married to Medicine.

Oh, it's going to get juicy in here. Luckily, we have doctors on staff in Atlanta back to marry to the. It's going to get juicy in here. You never know what's going to happen. Wait, so you guys tell me. Tell me like everything that I have to look forward to when I watch it tomorrow when I get back to L.A. I can't tell anybody apart except the white lady there. I said it. Oh, my God.

Okay, this is basically what it's like. The people who produce Real Housewives of Atlanta went on Craigslist, and they said, we are going to have auditions for the new housewives of, the new housewife of the cast of Atlanta. So come to this party and cause as much shit as you possibly can. So all these ladies showed up to a party, and they caused a whole bunch of shit trying to get on TV, and it made for a really fun hour i mean it was like a bad community theater version of a housewife show and i loved it i mean ben you know how normally like when you meet a new cast like shit doesn't hit the fan

until they have like a dinner party at the end of the third episode they started off with a party full of crazy bitches screaming yeah i can't wait it It was like basketball. What I saw, I was already excited about. I saw the, I saw the women arriving. I saw, um, what's her name?

Curry, Carrie, the white one. What's her name? Whitey. Curry is actually more appropriate because she does look like a bad stew. Well,

she, I saw her, she is the sexiest orthopedic surgeon in all of Atlanta. And I'm like, wow, the sexiest orthopedic surgeon in all of Atlanta. And I'm like, wow, the sexiest orthopedic surgeon. Lucky lady. Yeah, they showed that and then they showed his picture. And I was like, he's not hot, but okay.

No, he looks like, who's that crazy? Piers Morgan. He kind of does. That's better. I'll keep it there. I win again you win but yes she's she's obnoxious she's a really snooty idiot white lady who thinks the shit don't stink her face is hideous and she had the nerve to say you know looking like this

doesn't come easy it It's actually quite difficult. I was like, really? You look like a speed bump. You look like a speed bump that just got put on the street and nobody knows it's there yet, so they keep running over it really fast and it gets beat up, like, overnight. I mean, that woman looks like trash. Is the combination of,

she is Kim Zolciak meets Stephen Kojikaru with a twist of Martin Lawrence Ballard. Oh, that's an awful combination. And then deep fried for too long. Oh, wow. I am so excited. I'm so excited to see this train wreck. Her husband is obviously not into her.

She gets into her negligee and sends the kids away with a nanny and her spanish was hilarious she's like poquito adios you know that's how i speak spanish but anyway um who's the ringleader who's the black edition oh god or something okay this is tricky this is going to be a tricky one in these recounts because there are two characters one is i'm calling her barnum and bailey because she calls herself the ringleader i don't know her real name and then there's another one named quad okay quad is the ghetto friend that she's trying to bring into the group who's

married to a psychiatrist and is that they're both crazy don't call him a psychologist motherfucker is quad short for anything or just she's like Quad, like she's been named. It's like where all the college kids sleep in. She's like had every college kid in Atlanta, basically. Every college kid likes to lay out on her. Short for squad car because she'll be locked up in the back of one in about five seconds after she murders the cast. Yes, and she is married to a big idiot uh psychiatrist who's literally a pinhead he looks like the character from um american horror story

asylum the pinhead and he talked about my python well she also was about to divorce her he was also going to divorce her five minutes before they got married oh yeah they got in this fight and so they like a week before they got married they got into a fight and so she left the house to calm down or whatever and then he he group texted all of her friends and called off the wedding sounds like a great psychiatrist without telling her that doesn't sound like what a gay dude would do at all you know what that's what i want from my therapist level-headedness do you see do you see a therapist no i'm just saying didn't you say he's a psychiatrist yeah i was just curious i was asking a little bit about your personal life i pretend to care

i've tried to go to therapists but i just judge them the whole time i'm like oh god i can't go back to that idiot just like us judging la like la shrinks which we are not watching real oh i just tried to watch that show before this thing started, and there was some guy on there saying he hated fat people. Like, that's the storyline. He can't handle fat people. It's like, well, I can't handle ugly people. I'm not watching this show anymore. Click.

Which isn't true. I mean, obviously I like ugly people. So, anyway, this marriage and medicine show. Who's the uptight lady who thinks that she's above it all? She's like a real doctor. She's not like a wife of. She's like, she's trying to play Sharae. Yeah, exactly.

Do you see any similarity there? She's trying to be like classy, like faux classy like Sharae. And I kind of like her. She's kind of, she talks kind of like Felicia Rashad on The Cosby Show, Mrs. Huxtable. Yes, totally. And she talks to everybody like Mrs. Huxtable would talk to Cliff because he's so wacky and he's just such a dork, you know? And she's just barely tolerating him. And she's like that overly white tone.

She's kind of annoying, but I think she's kind of fun. And then there's the main lady who i'm so embarrassed i don't know her name but the the one that's going to bring all the drama is this quad girl and she's the one who says oh you don't know what's gonna happen tonight she's something she's over the top young it's like young candy's mom yeah i'm not gonna lie quad is already my favorite impression ever. Go. She's nuts.

And then her friend is the ringleader. She's Barnum and Bailey. And she talks similar. She's like, we made, I am married to the lead doctor. What is he, an emergency room doctor, I think? I'm married to an emergency room doctor, honey. And he is Bangladeshi. And we made our own honey. And he is Bangladeshi. And we made our own race.

It's called Bangladeshi. And so they both have this kind of race. I think it's Black. Bangladeshi. That part. We made our own race. Bangladeshi. Like, that's, ma'am, that's not your race um she really just is lil kim is it by the way

do they i didn't see enough of it but do they have a real relationship or is it clear that she married for the money um as ronnie said the entire show is really just people that were trying to get on the real housewives of atlanta and porsche got the spot so rest of these women, I don't even know if they were really at that Black pedestrian lady's house or if they were like at a rented place that Bravo set up and it was a casting call. And the entire season might take place in this rented house that was the casting call. Yes, because Bravo is notorious. No one really shoots. Well, reality shows in general, they usually don't shoot in their own home. They have production rent them a home. And I think that that's true because this woman had a party at her home well too she had one at the end

as well and she looked like she had never seen that backyard before oh never we can't have it out here in the backyard girl people's shoes will fall in the grass girl i need to work on her voice because it's very similar to um yeah they're they're very similar so i'm gonna need another couple of weeks of watching it but i don't know what that noise was but i really appreciated it oh you're gonna love when you see it you'll know and because they keep showing that clip they show that clip like 10 times it's hilarious that's the sounds we're going to be making when we're doing the donkey booty video oh yeah oh yeah that's i can't wait to do that. Your neighbors are going to love us.

So you guys are going to love Married to Medicine. If you haven't watched it you're going to feel horrible when you do because it's just a complete brain waster and it's going to be a really fun one. It's actually perfect now that Vanderpump Rules and Gallery Girls are gone. It is so abysmal

slash I'm totes in. Yeah. I can't wait. I can't wait. I'm happy that this could be our now third, like, new franchise show starting up now. Well, except Gallery Girls is now dead. Yeah.

This is exactly a Housewives. They might as well just named it Housewives. But it's really funny because their backgrounds are x-rays of their purses. Yes, I like that. Like, classy. That's really classy because their backgrounds are x-rays of their purses yes like classy that's really classy okay yeah it's like keys behind them like yeah nice wow what an original purse like are you boys um gonna be watching tabitha takes over the new season starts this week and i'm obsessed with her you know i'll I watch it, but it's not really like a show that

inspires much snorkiness from me. It's more like, oh look, she took over a sad gay bar and made it look... I'm sorry, that was the best episode ever when she went to Long Beach and took over the sad gay bar. Oh my god, Ripples. I mean, that is the gay bar in Long Beach. I used to live there and that's like

the bar, you know? I'm imagining Ronnie on the sad dance floor alone singing madeline khan singing sondheim um i don't like this is white from clue i don't like that you're putting that in a sad light because it was actually a very good night for me he won the karaoke con does bitch you know did i i have here's a name guys. I did meet the owner of Ripples because I recognized him from that episode. Oh, lord.

I met him at Enwiho, and I asked him all these questions. You never know what's gonna happen! He said that Tabitha was awesome. And that's all I can remember, because I was drunk. Oh, wow. I hope you keep a diary.

Can we move on to the main event yet? Yeah, because those are the only shows you watch? Sure, let's go there. Oh my god, Beverly Hills? Is that the main event? There's only a two-hour season finale slash reunion. Okay, you guys take care. Okay, where are we going to start? Okay, Ben, why don't you start with the whole, like,

remind everybody with the Faye breaking up the Marissa, Yolanda shit. Oh, gosh. So we started back up again with Faye. And if you remember, Faye had interrupted a conversation between Marissa and Brandy and Yolanda. And basically the first part of this episode was a confrontation with Faye. So I guess Faye went up to Lisa and was saying things like, Brandy's your mouthpiece.

And Lisa said that she felt insulted by that. You know what? That's an insult. That's a bloody insult what you just said. And Faye's like, honey, sweetheart, I would never insult you in your home. And then she continued to insult her. Yeah, she's like, you are fat, but I would never insult you. I would never say that you're fat in your home.

I mean, you're an awful person, and Brandy does all your legwork, but I would never say that to you in your home. I would never insult you, sweetheart. We're technically in the backyard, sweetheart. Sweetheart, maybe if you had allowed me to design this home like I have for other A-listers like Avril Lavigne and the UPS guy, then maybe I'd be kinder. Okay, so how much of a hypocrite is this bitch? Because Faye is the mouthpiece for weak-ass Kyle and for Adrian, who doesn't bother to show up all fucking season

until the very end to cry on Lisa's couch. Isn't Faye doing the exact goddamn thing that she's accusing people of? Absolutely. She's horrible. And when she says that she went in to protect Marissa because Marissa's an innocent and she doesn't like seeing an innocent

getting ganged up on, why does she even think that Marissa was being ganged up on? Okay, but then why why didn't marissa say i didn't need anybody to help me yeah she well didn't marissa say that well no she didn't say that technically but she she kind of turned on fay when fay accused adrian i mean of brandy of breaking up the marriage or whatever she was like oh come on fay how could you even say that fay marissa marissa's just kind of another dana like whoever gets in that i mean she's not as pathetic as dana sorry marissa because i know you're probably listening to this um but she's whoever's in that position is like notoriously sad and trying too hard yeah well then so then the big thing was that um faye was saying these these wild things and then kyle turned i'm sorry um lisa turns to

kyle to basically be like hey support me right now like back me up and kyle what does kyle do she just sort of says i don't want to get involved. I don't want any trouble. Da-da-da-da-da-da. She has done that all season long, and she just wipes her hands and flips her hair and walks away, and I don't think that she should be able to get away with that anymore. Her lying... Are you talking about Faye Stella was sending out? Yes.

Okay, yeah. Faye is such a compulsive liar, and when she knows that everything's not going her way anymore, she says, why is everybody attacking me? And yes, you are attacking me. And Brandy told me, Yolanda told me to leave the party. No, bitch. You see all these people around you with those giant machines?

Those are cameras. And they are recording your orangutan face. And we are hearing what you're saying, stupid. You never know what's gonna happen here! I, Faye, you know, Faye is wearing see-through lace dresses from, like, the go-round from, like, the 80s.

Corpse Bride. They were, like, things that she still off her Playboy shoot. She looks like a garbage pail kid made out of boogers. She does. She looks like a garbage pail kid made out of boogers. She does. She looks like the sole of a discarded shoe that was maybe used in the

City of God movie. I just sound like such an old person. The City of God movie, you know? She looks like a silly burnt flapjack that Lisa Renna made on a Sunday morning while she was cackling. She looks like when you leave yourjack that Lisa Renna made on a Sunday morning while she was cackling. She looks like when you leave your jack-o'-lantern on your stoop too long and then it's Thanksgiving and you're like, uh-huh, and you pick it up and it's all soggy and wet on the bottom. Actually, actually, that one is very, very true.

She's got like a sort of melty quality. Like, her face is just being like pinched all the way downward. It's so sad, Faye. She's melty jack like her face is just being like pinched all the way downward it's so sad face melty jack-o'-lantern she's like i'm bored i'm bored with this but the best part about the fey fight was that after she left we got this wonderful ancillary fight thing that happened with you can't say words like ancillary when we're talking about the housewives come on i know come on i'm sorry we got this bonus fight from kim well now i know what ancillary means kim just wanted to just have a moment because her she didn't really make any

sense she's like okay let's do the fight who do you want to be kyle or kim i'll be kyle because you're a better kim than i am i'll be like oh what am i gonna be um you you be fay you be mauricia because i think fay's in the bathroom at this part. Yeah. So Kyle's like, you know, I think she's just trying to stand up for, you know, she really hurt Adrian. Oh, yeah? How come? Remember that time that Brandy told me that thing?

Yes, but she told Adrian. Oh, Adrian! Adrian! What about that time that Brandy told me that thing? You remember that time and there were games and there was a dirty mirror in that house? Do you remember that time? Okay, so in addition to... I'm not doing math.

Don't try and make me do math. I'm not doing no math, Kyle. I was in a bathroom that was dirty. Why doesn't it mean anything to you, Kyle? All I'm trying to say is that regardless of your hurt...

Math! Regardless! Band-Aids! Cough syrup, Kyle! I got hurt, too. I got real hurt. I couldn't make chicken salad for three months don't ever say that in addition to

before Adrian got hurt my chicken salad got hurt my frames couldn't get hanged on the wall I couldn't even dust my pictures Kyle that was the dumbest fucking fight because Kim doesn't even know what they're talking about. Right, and it wasn't like it was staged

like so many other fights. Like, Kim just lost her goddamn mind for five minutes and they caught it on camera. I mean, it was magic. And I loved it also because Kyle got so irritated with her who was getting so annoyed. It was like, aha, this is like the the red boiling red hot kyle that we know from season one she's back for a moment to get so mad wants to strangle her

sister yeah she can fake it all year in her face and was like yeah i mean it was it reminded me exactly of when she accused her of being an alcoholic in the back of that limousine i thought she was gonna stick her you know bony ass finger in kim's face and say you're still an alcoholic yes um she can fake it pretty well. She faked it really well all year but Kim can always bring out the C word in her. Because there's no reasoning with Kim and Kyle

can't deal. Yeah. You guys, we have to move on because Kim is coming back for the reunion. So we need to discuss that after. Let's talk more about the reunion. So we need to discuss that after. Okay, let's talk more about the episode. So then...

The big news is that Adrienne, who was served with separation papers that night, shows up to the party. And she walks in, and she's immediately greeted by Kim and Kyle, and then she sort of, like, holds court on this couch. She doesn't say.... With that other fat

lady who we don't know and did not get chyroned. Yeah, she looks really familiar and she seems to be some sort of psychologist. You probably know her. I mean, you know Linda whatever. Linda. You do? Brody's mom. Oh, Linda Thompson?

Didn't you go to a party at Brody Jenner's house? I wish. Ew. I would have gone and hidden in his closet. I mean, I you go to a party at Brody Jenner's house? I wish. Ew. I would have gone and hidden in his closet. I mean, I've gone to a party and Brody Jenner was there. Name drop. But I haven't been to his house. Oh, well, maybe you lied.

Well, I'm doing a terrible job of lying. Anyway, Adrian comes into the house, Lisa's villa, which looks like a cheesy chain restaurant. She's greeted by Kim and Kyle. They hold court on a couch. And then you start getting confessionals where it goes, Lisa and Ken are offended that Adrian would show up at their house and not greet them and congratulate them despite the bad news that went down that day.

And then you get a confessional of Adrian going, they know the shit that I just went through and they didn't even come to check on me, but they were looking at me across the room. Whose side are you on? I'm team Ken and Lisa. Of course. Who's on Adrian's side?

That dumb ass. Here's the thing. Uh, Lisa, you know, that they were all, you're like, I'm on Batman's side.

Way to take a stand. Here's the thing. I'm only being evil to you because I know that you're upset with your metal arm and you're skinnier than me. Okay. Did you think that I said Batman? No, I'm just saying, like, you're rooting for the hero. So, like, of course you're going to root for the hero. I didn't put that together.

Then I was starting to think, like, I said jackpot. Did Ronnie think I said Batman? I didn't really know. It's late. starting to think, like, I said jackpot. Did Ronnie think I said jackpot? I didn't really know. It's late, okay? It's late. I'm not making any sense at all. I posted that recap link, and the only comment is, what is this? Because it's so...

It makes no sense. It makes no sense. Don't worry. That's just me. Sorry. I really did not understand where you were going with Batman, but I figured we'd just sort of gloss over it and just let it be. Did you even recognize Adrian because she'd been crying so much

and all of her clown makeup had fallen off? She does look like the Joker sometimes. I think she just got back from surgery, and that was still a full face of makeup. It was just flesh color, so she would look like she's grieving. I don't buy anything that's coming out of that woman's mouth by the way someone did put up a photo of adrian like way before all the plastic surgery when she was like oh my god we have to talk about that page it's on our facebook page she had a huge big bulbous nose excuse both of you but watch what you say because

she looks like every aunt in my family i'm not saying she she's bad. You already talk shit about Ben's cousin, so we're allowed to talk about your ugly aunts. Yeah, you called my cousin fat on the podcast, which is totally out of line. Look, I don't even know her. I just think her personality... She has a fat person's personality. She does not.

She does not. Does she look like Claire? Does she look like Lauren Manzo and is her name Claire? No, please. My poor cousin. Although her name is Lauren. Lauren, I'm so sorry. Your name is... Oh my god, does she love egg salad?

And by egg salad, I mean a tub of it. You guys, my cousin's Lauren Manzo. I have to confess, I am cousins with Lauren Manzo. The reason why I always mention Caface is because I'm trying to drive business to Franklin Lakes. No, my cousin is not Lauren Manzo, but her name is Lauren,

and she's a lovely girl, and she's not fat. I'm sure. No, I'm just kidding. You guys, I explained my point better. Come on now. I know. I wasn't just calling her fat.

I was just saying she probably was offended because she's fat, and she shouldn't be offended because we need to be prouder of our fatness and start hating skinny people more. Okay, everybody? Are your aunts proud of looking like Adrian Malouf pre-surgery? They proud of that, huh? Oh, my goodness.

Thankfully, my family does not support what I do, and they will never hear this. Oh my goodness. Adrienne shows up with her flesh-colored makeup face. Speaking of flesh-colored, what is with Kyle's's fat person dress while we're still talking about oh my god for being fat why is the mumu she's wearing that flesh colored piece right in front of her cleavage like those waitresses in las vegas who are union and they can't get fired for being old so the ones at caesar's the ones at caesar's palace are 80 years old and they have that flesh boob panel yeah well kyle was probably wearing it because she knew she was going to see Adrian,

and since Adrian leaves skid marks everywhere, she didn't want to ruin a dress. Exactly. Why not just put the flesh-colored panel in and she'll just rub on you and it won't even put a stain? She's like, I might have to hug Adrian tonight. Give me something sort of pumpkin-colored to wear. Okay, you guys, let me ask you a question did people know that this was going to be a vow renewal because kim and kyle are acting like they didn't know what it was and then kim and lisa i mean ken and lisa are saying that adrian knew that that's what it was so why would she be showing up um to cry about her marriage when she did what she knew kyle was acting and kim was drunk so excuse her from the equation she doesn't like math as you

mentioned earlier everybody knew why the hell else would paul and adrian and you know that day try to ruin the vow renewal by announcing their separation it was deliberate yeah but why would paul why would paul file i figured that it would be Adrian who would file. Don't you? Because I like what Kyle said about how when they immediately started talking about money. Yeah, they were like, well, Kyle said, well, you know, he made it nine years and ten years. That would have been a whole different argument with the prenup. So I'm wondering why he didn't.

Why wouldn't he hold on to that? I mean, if you've had to look at that thing every day for nine years, hold on. Hold on for one more year. I am totally Wendy if we're going to play Wilson Phillips. Yeah, that we're going to be celebrating. Somebody else's. Yeah, the same day that we hear our friends split. They're so upsetting.

I know. It's so funny. I don't know where the microphone is on my laptop, so I hope you could actually hear that. It was funny. If you guys don't get it, you have to listen to the last episode. That's an inside joke, y'all, so you have to listen to every episode. Wait, we didn't answer our question, which is,

should Adrian have gone to Lisa? And we say yes, right? Because as a guest, you at least have to come in and say hi, because what bothered me the most about this was that she came in, she announced that this happened, you know, she had the girls crying on her shoulders, and then she's like, I really, I just, I can't be out tonight. I have to go. Bitch, you put on all your flesh-colored makeup makeup and you did your hair, you put your tinsel in

and you come up, you show up for five minutes and then you leave without even saying hi to the hosts. I'm sorry, that's rude. I love Yolanda. Yeah, if you get a divorce, then it's time to stay home in your pajamas and think about what you did wrong. I felt we needed a little interlude with Wilson Phillips. You see, I'm doing the low voice because I'm the carny of the group.

Oh. Someday somebody's going to turn around and make you want to say goodbye. Till then, baby. Ben, you're totally Chinese. Here's what I think. Yes, of course, Adrian's coming into her enemy's

home during her vow renewal, sobbing about her own marriage breaking up and stealing all the thunder. So yes, she's being a total c-word and if lisa did come over to that couch adrian would have been like oh god you know i just got dumped and lisa's coming over here to tell me not to sit on a white couch that's the whole reason why she wanted to come over she wanted to come over and sort of like mark it up yeah! Skid mark it up, girl! She's broken her church for it. Yeah, she wanted to ruin the new couch and make it look just like the shit parade flower arrangement she sent her in the first episode.

Nine hundred months ago. Yeah, it's called wrapping it up. Wrapping it up. Paul probably just got sick of waking up and a bunch of skid marks all over his chest and rolling around in that bed. Ew! You know those sheets are just not good on the eyes.

They probably buy brown sheets. They're not in the same bedroom. Are you kidding? There's no way. You can always tell where Adrian is in the house. You just have to follow the tracks of orange goo that lead to wherever she is. What did you guys think about Maurizio coming and sitting on the edge of the couch like,

Oh, don't worry. Kids are resilient and they'll forget all about it. Don't worry about the kids. Okay, Adrian? Don't worry. Yeah, you know what? Fuck off, dude. You just fucking broke up a marriage.

I mean, he didn't break up the marriage, but a marriage just broke up. The kids are not going to be okay, okay? Their parents are divorced. Now the kids are going to start robbing stores and doing drugs and having sex with underage children and getting them pregnant because that's what divorce causes. Because this country needs marriage. It needs gay marriage. Both gay marriage. Supreme Court justices.

And meanwhile, those kids' parents are dating, like, robbing the cradle. Dad's with a 27-year-old. mom's with a 32-year-old. Ah, ah, ah, they broke up this week. Sean Stewart and Adrian Maloof are no longer a couple. I thought they got back together. Nope, they're off. He's like, Sean Stewart's like, you know, I was really into scat play, and I thought you were too,

and then I realized it was just your spray tanner on the sheets. Have you ever let anybody degrade you in the bedroom? No. Yes, by letting them keep the damn lights on. Sex is degrading. That's the whole problem with it. We need to outlaw sex and just start eating more. Everybody, let's start, let's promise to just eat more and rub each other's bellies and feet.

Well, as soon as the gays are allowed to start getting married there'll be a lot less sex yeah ain't that the truth um so anyway what else happened at this dumpy ass party i love that faye somehow got kicked out of the party or just disappeared after after her terrible after a terrible audition attempt to get on the show it was like she was out of there yeah but then they kicked her ass out and then they got back to the star of the show so who did actually renew her vows to ken and then we got to see all these other like randoms in the background like you know not was it dd who was there who is camille's friend with the red hair that drives me up the goddamn wall dd yeah she was there and she brought she even brought her friend hagrid that big that big lady yeah yeah

she's like don't listen to anybody telling you anything negative camille there's a magical spider loose in this party let me take care of it come here oh my god wait are you talking about magical spiders again? Yeah, I'm talking about that haggard girl that Camille keeps bringing everywhere that keeps Dee Dee in line. What was our spider joke from like a year ago that was fucking hilarious? That you had a spider butler.

Oh, a spider butler! Yes, and then somebody drew a picture of it. Yeah, you have a little spider butler that brings you greyhounds. Oh, that's my drink. Oh, Ben, you must be stalking me i just mad i know you at this point we also had um a taylor armstrong who has nothing to do talking to um yolanda's or yolanda's husband david foster's ex-wife and asking her permission if she can start being nice to yolanda

because when you're 40 years old you have to ask your friend if you can be friends with somebody else it has just been so hard on me because the way that you guys got a divorce and now she's with him and i see her and i don't want you to make it. Talking about making it all about yourself. She is such a bitch. It's not about you, Taylor. I love that stupid Linda was like, oh God, you like my jewelry? I rotate my jewelry like some people rotate their tires.

Shut up. That's like, how was her attempt at having that as her opening line if she's like the new cast member? She's like, I spent five months coming up with this, so as long as I'm not in the opening credits, I might as well say it somewhere. Yeah, my ghost writer's getting paid.

I rotate my jewelry like some people rotate ties. It doesn't work. It's too hard to get this zip code not giving up without a fight. It doesn't work. Too hard to get this zip code.

Not giving up without a fight. Did we talk about this last week? That Linda was supposedly trying to get on the show. And that Yolanda got on instead. And one of Yolanda's clauses supposedly was that Linda would not be on. Even as like a friend of the housewives or whatever. Well, I'm fucking glad because I am team Yol well now i am and you know what god bless this show for the miracles they pull every year i mean they really do get you to hate different people every year and oh yeah we knew that it was going to be coming with yolanda that she was going to suddenly become a hero and

bitch pulled it off i gotta tell you you know You know what? She did. And you know what? Her big coming out party, I think, was truly the reunion. She really... That was the Yolanda show. It was all about Yolanda. Look at that segue again, Ben. My God. Andy made it all about Yolanda.

He did not stop. Well, it was about Yolanda and it was also about trashing Kyle, which was the funniest part because Kyle has tried to be so nice this season and she just ended up looking like the biggest idiot out of all of them in the end you did listen to that show did you listen

to that Matt yes you listen to that Bobby Dooley show oh my God hello why do you think I was just doing that I'm so glad you? I was just doing it because I was so glad you listened to it. I love it. Mm-mm-mm. Mm-mm-mm. I can communicate with you, Ronnie, like that all day long and I know

exactly how you're feeling and what's going on. Honestly, my favorite part of the reunion was really one moment when Kim got really mad at Yolanda. It's towards the end and she just started going, Yolanda! Yolanda! I'm a bit louder, but I don't want to wake up my parents. But it just was so funny to hear Kim Richards yelling Yolanda.

Yolanda! Yolanda! She, Kim Richards, okay, this was my, Kim Richards was also one of my favorite parts, of course, of the reunion. Wait, I have to ask you a question, Ronnie. What color was her hair? Holy shit. Oh my God. Someone told her they were remaking The Wizard of Oz and she was going for some scarecrow.

For real? That was not cute. That was some, I mean, I would never suggest white rain to anybody, but Kim, go to the 99 cent store. I know you're not rich, but they still got conditioner that you can use. Come on now. Have Morris buy some for you. He bought you a house

that he took away. He'll come take your white rain away too maybe. I love that Kim is like now Yolanda, I'm going to clarify something here now. You go behind my back and say we had some lemon meeting plan we didn't have a plan for a lemon with you we never made a plan she's like sweetheart sweetheart we did make a

plan we made a plan 5 000 times i make a plan with you to come do lemon you don't show when did we make a plan i'm gonna clarify something because we did not make a lemon plan. Yes, sweetheart, sweetheart. And I love that Yolanda is like sexually harassing women with sweetheart, sweetheart. It's so sexy. It's so abusive. Like she would be so, she's like a raging. Those words go hand in hand for me, sexy and abusive.

That is why I'm single. She's definitely sexually harassing women, which I think is very funny because she's like looms well she definitely well she definitely has a big dick like fay there's no doubt yeah and so but anyway that whole fight turned into kim being wrong again and she says look we set it up through production and you didn't show up for the day that we're supposed to do it. And she's like, yeah, that was production, but we didn't talk on the phone personally. Kim, what the fuck does it matter? You made an appointment.

Does it make it any different if you make an appointment with me through my secretary and don't show up? No, you didn't show up, bitch. You had an appointment. You didn't show up. Kim, take some responsibility, okay? Pay your bar tab. You cannot just be going to bars and drinking the whole thing and then saying that you didn't drink anything and leaving you got to pay your tab cam it was probably

hanging out with taylor in the back of a um closet in the bottom of a louis vuitton duffel bag leave her alone well it was sort of crazy to me about how much it came up during this reunion about like uh hanging out during shooting versus after and that was set up through production it wasn't set up through me these women truly live double lives that's what this is coming down to Ben, do you not think it's a little surprising?

I kind of think that it's weird that Bravo seems to be pulling the curtain back a little bit and letting us know that there are staged moments and that this is a production, that this is a show and i think a lot of what's going on in the tabloids right now with you know adrian and lisa and all this kind of stuff kind of does draw that curtain back but i don't think that bravo's worried about it i it's weird i mean it's well this well everything that came up with three yolanda

because i don't watch tv i read a book or do something or make a dinner for my husband or clean something. She said that she had never watched the show before. Yeah, first of all, don't believe that. Do not believe that for one second that she never watches. I just turned it on and there were people screaming. Shut up.

Shut up. You've seen the show. But also, she was the one who kept saying, well, I told the producer and I think that the shit she was saying was just so juicy that they couldn't really cut it out, you know? Right, that's true.

Because the stuff with Adrienne is true. She is still selling stories to stupid radar online. And she's, you know, all those stories like dissing Lisa's restaurant and stuff like that. I don't think that that's fake. I mean, that woman's pretty vile. She couldn't even hide it in the end in her diary room sessions, which was pretty funny. I want to be around women who are supportive and who I actually like.

Really? Name one. Were you guys surprised also at the beginning of the episode, like Andy pretty much really came clean? By coming clean, he threw Adrienne's ass under the bus and they started the first five minutes of the show were saying, Adrienne claims that she um quit the show but in fact her ass got fired part of her job is to show

up here and go through the reunion and she chose not to be here and andy was like and bitch is not coming back next year that was like a really like strong way to start the thing is he didn't technically say that she was fired he just said that her final act as a housewife was not to show up and she will not be returning. But he didn't say she got fired. Yeah, yeah, he totally dissed her. But she's saying that she quit and he's saying she got fired. And I'm not sure what I believe.

Do you really think that she got fired that day? Fired. She is not quitting. This woman, it's exactly what, was it Brandy who said it? That money can buy you a lot of things, but it can't buy you fame? That's exactly what, was it Brandy who said it? That money can buy you a lot of things, but it can't buy you fame? Yeah.

That's exactly what this was. Do you think Adrienne Malouf is going to give up being famous? She loves planning those articles and radar online. Who is going to buy fucking Zing vodka if she doesn't advertise it on Bravo? Well, I love that she's being dissed all over Bravo after paying a shitload of advertising money for Zing with those terrible commercials that are filmed with 20 year olds in her mansion it's like pathetic have you seen these no they're just she was also the main she was also the main sponsor of the perez hilton birthday party that she was at in that skank ass out get me some music that the kids like that just goes and get some young people put filters on them and make the put light in the vodka. Everyone's gonna drink it.

My new favorite impression is Ronnie as Adrian talking about synthesized music. Yeah. She's trying to make it sound like a bass beat, but it just comes across like an old dog farting. I'm just imagining the spray tan oozing off of her. I want electricity in water,

and I want kids drinking it. I want gloved hands poking through rose walls with shots. And the only flavor she has is red velvet. Come on. Lady, you're pathetic. Go away. She's the worst. Wait, so what other funny things happen at the reunion?

Brandy was slamming Adrian for not showing up showing up and says yes she deserves to be fired and yes this is her obligation and yes she's a piece of trash um the big oh the the big controversy that the the uh episode ended on was uh the richard sisters claiming that yolanda said that lisa was fake and then lisa said she didn't believe the rich sisters. What do you guys think really happened? I don't believe anything that comes out of Kim's mouth and anybody that does is fucking stupid. I believe that it was a variation on what we actually saw on camera

where Lisa was talking. Lisa would not shut up that night about how wasted Kim was. She was talking to everybody that she could about how wasted Kim was and she was doing it right in front of Kim. I mean, she was being kind of an asshole. Lisa was that night. She was. And that's when Yolanda started of Kim. I mean, she was being kind of an asshole. Lisa was that night.

She was. And that's when Yolanda started to blossom and go, oh, can this woman shut the fuck up? Yeah. And Yolanda said, you know, in front of Lisa at the party, I mean, at the dinner table, and she said in her testimonial that Lisa's seen by now, right? I would think so.

She said, you know, I think that that's wrong, that Lisa's talking right in front of her. I think that that's really, really rude. If she front of her. I think that that's really, really rude if she says that she cares about her, that she's sitting here talking about her. Like, I mean, so she basically can't, Kyle's accusing her of something which we've already seen her say

and she was just speaking her mind. She wasn't saying Lisa's a phony bitch and she hates Lisa. Shut up, Kyle. I think the Richards sisters are such unreliable witnesses. They seem to get everything wrong. Let's not forget back in season one, the whole thing with Kelsey Grammer and what Kyle had said and what Camille had heard.

I mean, I personally think that Yolanda probably said something like, you know, the way Lisa was acting was very fake. I think she's acting very fake. And then they probably heard it as lisa's fake you shouldn't be friends with her because right like i can say ben you're acting like a bitch but that doesn't mean ben i think you are a bitch and that's how you choose to hear it so as judge judy would say put your listening ears on bitch well what was that what what was it that made kyle say that because she was deflecting blame off herself so what was the argument because i forgot what it was um they were all kyle about something well yolanda had

this whole thing that she wasn't didn't feel welcomed by the group um but that wasn't it i don't know i wouldn't try to remember why why they were having kyle was in trouble for something and then she was like, oh, why didn't you say what you said about Lisa if you don't talk behind anybody's back? I think that Kyle probably knew probably three quarters of the way through to see something that she was going to get the bad edit

and now she knows that she is the hated one and she will do anything to deflect. No, what it was was that when Lisa was talking about the state of their friendship and she was saying how Brandy doesn't talk behind anyone's back, and Lisa was saying, I don't talk behind anyone's back, which is kind of bullshit. And Kyle was saying, well, I talk to my girlfriends, da-da-da-da-da.

And I think that, if I remember correctly, Yolanda probably jumped in there to probably defend Lisa or to say, you do talk behind people's back. And that's when Kyle said, well, why don't you say what you said about Lisa? Yeah, that was pretty good. But I love that they're showing the next week clips of Kim having a fit that she was being accused of being drunk. And then how dare you say something when she's trying to prove to everybody that she's sober.

Kim, you are not sober. You are not fooling fucking anybody. Stop it, Kim. Stop it. And you're going to have to prove for the rest of fucking time that you are sober until you are dead, which could be tomorrow. You know, I know a lot of people, especially a lot of gay guys, are mama's boys, and they talk about their moms being their heroes. And I would like to tell you something heroic that my mother did. My mother has always been a wine drinker.

Ever since I was a young boy, she'd have these junior league meetings and just be wasted in the afternoon with all these junior league bitches, just all of them drunk as hell. Because that was okay back in those days, you know? And as times changed, and you had to stop smoking inside and being drunk all day, my mom has kept drinking. And she has kept those boxes of Franzia, which have now become boxes of some other fancy Target Pinot Grigio. And she keeps that drinking up until she is sloppy. And one time we thought, you know what, mom, it's not cool to be this sloppy anymore. No one else is drunk all day anymore. Times have changed. You have got to stop drinking. She did stop drinking, and she became a horrible,

horrible human being. And we all sat together as a family after about a month of this and said, mom has got to start drinking again. And we had a reverse intervention. We told her, just have a fucking drink. My mom is drunk. She is the drunkest ass Canasta fall down.

She will tell you off at 2 in the morning on Christmas night playing the Canasta game. And I have to say, you know what, Mom? Bravo, you brave bitch. I love you. You just keep it up. And, Kim, you need to get some balls about you and have your drink and be fine with it and just get a driver, Kim. You've already been a star. She just needs Uber. We have fucking uber here drink as much as you fucking want don't kill anybody on the road and who cares yes just don't your children don't live at home kim jr by the

way what kind of woman names her daughter jr i don't know but i'm so sick of this fake ass sobriety i'm just so sick of it. Have a fucking drink. And I love that she's sitting there lecturing Taylor. And you know what? Good for Taylor. Taylor knows she's about to be fired. And she is just doing whatever she can to claw her way, you know, to stay on that stage. And how did she not slug Kim?

I mean, Kim is sitting there saying, well, I don't think you're going to have to drink. You can't have anything anymore. Now it's dry from now on. You're dry. Go, Kim. If she fought too hard to get in this zip code to leave now, bitch should have slugged Kim on the reunion. I think that Taylor should

do everything that you're saying that Kim should do, which is Taylor has to keep drinking and get Uber, because I love drunk Taylor. Every time they show a montage of her being wasted and like cackling with that big ass mouth oh my god oh my god what about i'm sorry to jump back to the show when she ate the cake and everybody in the room was like gobsmacked because her big giant ass jaws mouth could take

down an entire cake in one bite i think that's around the time my dad said to me he's like why do all these women sound like friend dresser oh man well you know what taylor i think season one i like taylor season two i absolutely hated her because of all this russell stuff that just made me sick to my stomach but then this season she's been such a crazy bat you know she's just been so batty i like her again so you know again well done just been so baddie. I like her again. So, you know, again, well done. Well played Beverly Hills. I wanted Andy to be a dick and go Taylor.

Um, I know we're taping the reunion right now, but you know where Kennedy is right now. Oh my God. Oh, well, what about that explanation? What was that about?

Um, you know, that, that clip of drunk that she's in love and she doesn't know where her daughter is. And then Brandy is like, well, Kim and Kim and Kyle are bad friends for talking about that publicly and

making her look like an idiot and a drunk. And then Kyle and camera saying, no, no, we knew that it was okay. They just Bravo just cut all that stuff out. That's a lie. You think lies?

Yeah. Yeah. Kim, Kyle is not like a great friend to her. They're just castmates. Kyle is such a big gossip. All she wants to do is gossip. I wish she would just fess up to it and say, you know what?

I love gossiping. I have crazy friends. They do crazy things. And I love talking about it with my other crazy friends. Exactly. So it's like Brandy admits like, hey, I'm a big, stupid whore with a big, surly mouth. Kyle should say I'm a big fucking gossip. Kim and Taylor should both say they're big fucking drunks.

And Yolanda should say I'm obsessed with lemons. Yeah. Well, I think that Kyle did kind of admit it because Lisa was saying, oh, well, you talk about me behind my back all the time. And Kyle said, well, look, if I'm having problems with you, I do talk to my girlfriends. That's what your girlfriends are for. And that's true. I mean, we would sit there and do that, I think our girlfriends or whatever we would sit there and talk about i talk about everybody all the time and i have no problem with it yeah and that's why that's why we all hang out

so much uh apart from the show yikes yeah um what is going on and why was there no camille and or dana well camille had five seconds you know Camille got dropped from the show, so she was five seconds at the end. Camille started pulling Adrian bullshit in the end. Camille had more screen time this entire season than Marissa and Taylor combined.

Yeah, I'm wondering if Camille got cut out of the season late or what happened with that. Because she was everywhere this year. Yeah, she was cut out at the end. I don't know. Um, I feel like they gave her like a little, her last little soundbite was something like,

I hope I find love, which sounded very much like a sign off from Camille grammar, you know? Totally. But, um, here's my other question. Is Marissa going to be here at,

I mean, like what is going on with her? I don't think so because her real big stab really just fell flat i mean she tried to make she tried to go against brandy which is really stupid when you're going against pretty much one of the most popular housewives of the season for no how about you pick anybody but her yeah like why are you going after her for no reason that was just that was just stupid it was a bad move and then really all she did the rest of the year was act frigid i mean well did her story arc fall apart when her

um husband or her husband's father died like could we have seen more had she made it to paris or was she always just going to be boring in paris i think she's going to do spill wine on her dress again i mean like that's all she's offered all season is like explaining that it's hard to get stains out with even soda well you never know on these shows that could provide a a through line for an entire season a spill on the dress i mean look how much traction we got out of adrian's skid marks please stop saying it really bothers me so what else do you think is going to happen because this is only going to be a two-part finale, which seems weird because the trend for these Housewives shows

have been to go to like 22 episodes and then have three reunions. And this one was cut at 19 episodes and only has two reunions. So WTF, you guys? Did they just run out of steam? I think they ran out of steam. And to be honest with you, I could not be more excited for OC. I'm tired. I want to put Atlanta and I want to put Beverly Hills to bed right now.

But I actually think that on next week's episode, Reunion Part 2, they're trotting out Mauricio and they're trotting out Ken. And apparently the guys get into it. And it's all going to be about Kyle versus Lisa for next year. Well, they said that Kyle was on on watch what happens live or someone was on watch what happens live and kyle called in on the phone and she was in the car with brandy and who was the other one brandy and somebody else and they were all going to dinner together so it's all fake bullshit but i sure love this fake bullshit well they said that kyle and lisa have not talked since reunion that was the news that broke today as well. I love that I call that news.

God, I should kill myself. Yeah, Lisa's, like, once she's done with you, she's pretty much done. I mean, she's not really a second chances kind of a girl. No, not at all. Yeah, but I would hate if Lisa were not on this show. I mean, I love Vanderpump, and Lisa will forever do that because it's a hit now. But, like, this show, as much as I hate Kyle, needs Kyle, Kim, and Lisa there. Well, Lisa really, I mean, if you think about it, she's mostly boring.

I mean, she's good for, like, the one-liners and stuff like that. And if somebody's really. Checkmate, bitch. Yeah. You know, she has those moments. And she does, like, a lot of funny, like, old people sex jokes and stuff like that. But, man, I don't need any more scenes of her, like, swinging on a swing that Ken made her or showing her house to somebody for the 20th time. Like, I don't know. I agree.

I can only look at her dressing room so many times before I feel like I've seen it all before. Yeah, I mean, that just looks like it's all going to be an out-of-the-closet in five years. Oh my God, best line of the episode, though, was when Brandi told her, you have to get down there and get married to Ken again. He's going to die soon. And then they both laughed. I know, it was fucked up.

I know. Do you think that they should, should they clean house and should they re, I feel like with Beverly Hills, you could probably recast from the ground up and it would be okay, whereas New York, you cannot do that. I don't know why I feel that. Because Beverly Hills, there's so many crazy, ridiculous women who look pretty much the same that you probably – they're all interchangeable. Whereas New York, I don't know, the personalities that they have on New York are so distinct and awesome that, gosh, I just can't imagine replacing a Countess Luanne or Ramona. Yeah.

Also, the fights on Beverly Hills are so prude. Like, if you think about it, it's the only Housewives show that they've had a fight about somebody saying the F word or somebody offending people at the dinner table with, you know, by saying cock or. It's not like, it's not like topless, um, Sonia in a swimming pool, like drunk and squawking like a bird. Yeah. It's like, I feel like on the other shows, especially, I mean, New York and New Jersey, I've, I've said this a million times, but those shows traumatize me because it's just, they beat you up.

I mean, it's all fake. It's, they're so hateful they're so full of shit but these women i mean i think that these women are total phonies none of them have any class they have money but they're none of them are necessarily classy but they think they are and that makes it funny to me because the fights are just so organic and they're so silly yeah this whole fight between adrian is because lisa made a rhyme that Adrian didn't understand. And this has gone on for two years. And yet we talk about it with our spare time.

Yeah. Do we have... We are going exceptionally long tonight. So do we have any other sort of last thoughts on this before we put it to bed? I just ate all the croutons out of my salad and not the salad. That's like, you know, croutons are another thing that remind me of Faye Resnick, I feel like. I feel like she's a crouton

that's been sitting in lemon vinaigrette for two days. Yes, ma'am. I don't know why you felt me just say that. Well, I don't think I have anything more to say. I'm pretty worn out. But we do have a really fun week coming up because we have the second reunion. We have the beginning of Orange County. We have the second episode of Married to Meds.

And Tabitha, motherfucker. I ain't watching that. What else? You all watching? What else are you going to watch this week so I can make sure I watch it? I think I'll watch Zoe and Brad. I kind of got into Zoe, Brad, and that Dukes of Melrose, even though I want to kill both of the guys at Dukes of Melrose.

And I know where their shop is, so I could kill them if I wanted to. Oh, God, we didn't even talk about those fools. Next week. Let's just, you know what, let's not talk about any more of the gay people on Bravo until we get gay marriage, okay? Let's just, let's just, you know what, let's not talk about any more of the gay people on Bravo until we get gay marriage, okay? Let's just keep America safe, and then we'll, then we'll bring the hateful gays back out.

Yes, yes. The most hateful gay on Bravo is Tamara Barney. And she's about to be back on our TV. Yeah, she is the meanest gay man I have ever seen on TV. Yeah, she's horrible. And this season's gonna be especially painful painful because this is where Tamara has her sex talk show, trying to rip off candy. So this is going to be Tamara talking about her dried out, dry, broom vagina.

And Vicky's chin implants. So it'll be amazing. I know. I'm sorry, Vicky. Are you listening to that competing sex show, Riley? Hey, hey, hey, Riley. Riley. Okay, hey, hey, Riley. Riley. Okay, everybody.

Well, thank you for listening. We all watch what crappens. You can find us on Twitter at What Crappens. I'm at TVgasm. Ben is at B-Side Blog. And Matt is at Life on the M-List. Come join us on Facebook at facebook.com slash watch what crappens. And find us on iTunes.

And give us some ratings and votes. Unless you hate us. In which case, keep it to yourself and don't tell anybody. And I'm sorry if I offended any fat people. But just please know that I am fatter than you. And I hate myself more than you ever could. Okay, bye everybody. Love ya. Bye.

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