Watch What Crappens - BelowDeck: Open Mouth, Insert Infected Foot
Episode Date: October 31, 2018Caroline continues to unravel on "Below Deck," but then again, maybe we all would if we heard our co-workers talking crap about us after hours. Plus, she has a foot infection, and it hurrrrrt...s, guys! Meanwhile, Chandler is still the worst, and he won't even let Rhylee go fishing. Could Chandler BEEEEE any more illogical? How about you pretend to be Captain Lee and listen to our podcast while you lie out in the sun, mmmkay? See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Hey everyone, welcome to Watch Your Crappens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to watch.
I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today is the wonderful and charismatic
boason of this podcast.
It's Ronnie Caron, who can also be found on the Rose Prick's Bachelor Rose podcast. What's up?
Oh jeez, what a way to start.
Bueller's already barking at someone.
And you know, I just opened that damn front door
to see if I had an Amazon package.
And I didn't.
Oh, that's OK.
Bueller's allowed to bark.
You know, Bueller is an honorary member of this podcast.
I mean, he basically is a member of the podcast.
Well, he just came slinking over like, why didn't you
even yell at me?
He's like, I'm just going'm not playing real trouble now. Yeah
Um, hi everyone. Welcome to the podcast Bravo podcast today. We are gonna be talking about
Below deck. We're also going to be dipping into the crap ins
Listener spotlight situation. We have some more entries. So I'm very excited about that.
Not entries, but like submissions. And a week, just a week and two days from now,
we are going to be in beautiful Seattle, Washington, where we will be doing a live show.
It's going to be fabulous. Love, I'm like truly so beyond excited to go back to Seattle. It's been
about nine years for me.
So excited about that.
Go to watchacrapans.com for tickets.
Make sure you get them.
And then of course, in Nashville and December,
go get those tickets.
And I know it's Halloween right now.
So I know this is a very spooky time of the year,
but do not be afraid to get those tickets.
And of course, even though today is Halloween, it's never too early to think about Christmas
and Hanukkah.
And the good news is that if you go to WatchCrapins.com, you can find links to our little merchandise store
where you can get our Christmas t-shirts or Christmas merch that Ronnie made.
It's amazing.
Tell us about it, Ronnie. They are Christmas and Monica.
Sure. They're both Ramona style.
The Christmas one is ho ho ho.
Okay. And then the second one is happy Ramonika.
Little Ramona faces is the menorah candle.
Yeah.
Yeah. You can get those for the next month or so.
Get them now because they take a while to make a ship.
And so I want to make sure you happen for Christmas. That's why they're on sale so early. I know it's early to be
talking Christmas, but get them now. Get them? So let's get it. Hey, why don't we move on to a very
spooky episode of Below Deck. The ghost that won't be go away Caroline
I don't know She would be Ike about crane. She's like the Ike about crane of this yacht. Let's be honest
Yeah, where you're kind of like oh you just kind of want to like kick his cane away. Oh, I saw a headless yaddy
Okay, whatever Caroline
You're like rooting for the wrong people. I know
We're rooting for that less horseman
Yeah, the ghost of Christmas future or whatever. Oh, you know, we're merging the two holidays together
We're bring them together with the favorite stories
Okay, so the episode opens
We with the last thing that we saw previously was that that Kate and Josiah were basically
Making fun of Caroline up in their bunk's being total mean girls and she's like I heard that
I like the guy with a dustbusters seems to be working up. So
so now it's 752 in the morning and
So, so now it's 7.52 in the morning and everyone's waking up and Adrian's doing like yoga on the floor, being like oh, you know, typical Adrian stuff. And of course, Caroline is just crying. She just wakes up crying.
Yeah, she's just like her hair is all over her face is all over and she's in her bunk. Yeah, crying and rubbing her foot and she's like I am physically and mentally
Shit my foot is swollen like a balloon. I have no idea why I'm completely over this toothpaste bullshit
Like oh, she's gonna blow. Yeah, she's literally if it's not her if it's not her foot. It's gonna be her brain and I'm I'm ready for it
I'm excited. I love a blow deck meltdown and And then Chandler's over, you know, giving everybody bossy stuff, except that he is like
not his place to do it.
He seats in the mess and he's like, um, guys, I know I talked to you guys, but the mess is
disgusting this morning.
Like Kate never cleans and they show that there's a list of names that they've made, like
who's turned it into as to clean.
And then they go, oh, go ahead. and they show that there's a list of names that they've made, like who's turned it into a secluded.
And then they cut, oh, go ahead.
Let me just say strong words from the guy
who wouldn't even take out the garbage for Caroline, okay?
Yeah, exactly, jerk.
So then we cut to K and Josiah and Beds,
still with Cheetos, she's too inconsistent.
It's like they just, they passed out, then woke up
and had their hands right back in the Cheetos bag.
Yeah, exactly.
So they're still lying there with their Cheetos. And Caroline's like, it's like, oh, oh, come in. There must be a,
I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, Oh my god, the tide pot is talking. Yeah. So, Caroline tells Kate, she goes, but I'm sorry. Oh my god, the tide pot is talking.
Yeah.
So, Caroline tells Kate, she goes, but I'm sorry.
Oh my god, the tide pot is talking.
Yeah.
So, Caroline tells Kate, she goes, but I'm sorry.
Oh my god, the tide pot is talking.
Yeah.
So, Caroline tells Kate, she goes, but I'm. Oh, my god, the tide pot is talking.
Yeah. So, Caroline toast Kate. She goes, well, I heard what you said last night. She goes,
what did I say? Kate plays this. Is this a mean girl way, but it works so effectively. She just
plays dumb and, but like, warm and dumb. She's like, what did I say? And Carol's like, well, I heard what you said,
like you were saying, like, I don't know,
like you were saying, I was like, useless or whatever.
And he's like, oh, wow.
That's a scary statement to hear that you heard,
like, no, not for you to hear,
but for me to hear that I heard that I said something
about you.
And then she's not getting what she wants from Kate, right?
Because Kate's just like, oh, well, that's interesting.
Do you heard that?
And Caroline's like, well, look, guys, sometimes I'm just thoughtless.
I fuck up, okay.
And Kankas, Kate goes, same.
Oh my god, what was I saying?
I was drunk.
Like, I think we all talk about things that annoy us sometimes.
Do you want a cheeto?
I would love to see a redbine you to cheeto.
Oh, I'm sorry as you.
I keep getting mixed up.
Are you a cannibal?
Cheeto face.
So then somehow, even though there were the ones who were talking
should about Caroline, she wants I'm saying, I just want you guys to know.
I forgive you in no heart feelings.
Thanks, even though we technically didn't apologize
feelings Kate literally went okay
Then Karla leaves in cage just goes that was weird
Yeah, she goes look at my butt. Yes, what happened
Which whenever Kate has that much tonality in her voice,
you know she's just done with you, you know?
And Caroline's like, okay, bye, hurt my foot.
She's like, hmm, that was weird.
I don't think we said any terrible.
And she's like, I don't remember.
I don't remember, I don't care to.
And you know, kids like, you know, today
was really gonna be reserved for making fun of Riley,
but we can switch it over to Caroline if you want. I think that sounds like a wonderful idea.
So in Chandler's Chamber, Captain's up on the balcony watching Chandler and the guys.
I just like noting that Captain's on the balcony is like, ha, look at that.
Look at that. It's a bunch of idiots. That's a three-stooge is down there Larry Curly Mama. Hey, idiot!
So now Kate and Josiah have moved over to the crew mess. crew mess it last and Riley comes through and she's like just so everyone
knows and by everyone I mean Kate and Josiah the crew mess was
Feltie and I've been like cleaning up after myself, but everyone has to and kids like hmm
Thank you for that Riley.
Thank you so much.
Thank you.
Thank you.
So lucky to have you on the boat.
Thank you for learning things.
Like, I know you've been the captain of your own boat
as your boat called the SSOPS.
OK, thanks.
And again, she uses her over it to Nality.
She's like, thank you.
Oh, Riley.
So actually, about that list, I want to be kept off that list because I claim to take care of people all day, and that's why I make the big box.
Okay. I think it's pretty obvious that I didn't write that list because if I had written it, it would be a totally different font face, clearly a sans-serif.
Maybe not an aerial, maybe an aerial black condensed, but definitely not this basic times in your Roman
That's printed out by I don't know who did it, but I'll just say his name is handler. Che okay. Thanks. That's not winged things
So Riley's like she seems to be the head bitch's heart
Guess what it's like cutaway
Okay, so Chandler Chandler's like hiaway. Okay, so Chandler's like,
Hi Dad, it's me, Chandler.
I'm on a boat.
Okay, bye dad.
Hi Dad, certainly wouldn't put up with this shit.
I'm like, oh shut up.
Oh, go marry your dad.
I know.
And then Josiah is just in a bedroom,
dealing with sheets.
He's like, oh, these sheets are going to be the death
of me. The only thing that could make a worse would be if Caroline were here. Oh, I'm sorry,
I didn't see you there. I thought I was through a pillow. Bruce Willis is ironing. And Caroline
as she, as she hears him, she's like, come to the camera. She's talking to the iron.
There's something about below dexedus that they always just end up communing with the
iron. It happens every season on this show.
The ones who were stuck with the iron end up just like taking all their aggression out
in conversations with the iron.
They think they're going to make friends and instead they wind up doing that.
Isn't that ironic?
Ironic doesn't make any sense.
So Ashen is doing a strippers-do.
He's in a sling swinging off the side of the boat.
Yeah.
And, you know, Kate is enjoying this.
She's like, huh, look.
He's like washing the windows from outside.
She was like, that looks like fun.
Can we do that when you're done Ashton?
And Raleigh is like, eh, that is if you're not
already too busy, that was a callback.
You know, I'm the captain of a boat.
And on boats, we go back to port. So that was like a callback, like my boat going back to port. Get busy, that was a call back. You know, I'm the captain of a boat and on boats we go back to port.
So that was like a call back like my boat going back to port.
Get it, Kate, get it, Kate.
And Kate goes in the radio.
Is that for radio speak?
Up the chain of demand.
Josiah, I just go.
That's such a terrible.
That's such a terrible.
And the captain's just listening up there laughing.
He's like, oh, I'll tell you this much.
I'm not staring into space for two seconds. So that was a nice break. Feels good to be sitting
up instead of leaning on my hand over a table. I like Kate, because she's just not smart.
So Caroline goes up to the captain and he's like, I'm gonna start petting a back door on this thing.
Who the hell told you people you're just allowed to come up here
all willing, Nelly, whenever you want to?
I did not realize we had a fire hydrant on board,
but I guess we do.
I guess they'll come and help.
Oh, wait, I'm so sorry, Caroline, come on in.
Hmm.
So she's like, my pet hurt.
Yeah.
He's like, go to the doctor.
All right, get out.
So just I and Kate, see her and he's like, hurt. Yeah. He's like, got on the doctor. All right, get out. So just I and Kate see her.
And he's like, has your foot.
And she's like, oh, they can't have the city
making appointments.
So, girl, hope that's OK.
I really did not want to know.
I was just showing some token concern.
I was talking to the cheetah.
I was talking to the bed.
How is the photo bed? So Kate So okay, it's like, um here's an idea. How about you sit there at that desk and fold and
Then when you do things that require not sitting or folding then we'll figure something out. Okay curtain rod
Fill Collins could do an entire concert on one foot. So maybe you can like hold some laundry
Phil Collins could do an entire concert on one foot. So maybe you can like hold some laundry.
Hmm.
So Kate goes to talk to the chef.
He's like, what are you doing on tomato sauce on puff pastry?
Well, crazy chef.
That is insanity.
And he's like, so did you come up with nicknames
for all the crew?
Like, because she keeps calling him alien.
Yeah.
Well, look, I hope you know that when I call you
alien, I mean, that is a compliment. Okay. Yeah. And he goes, um, I'm starting to get offended a little
bit. She's, do you get offended? You should meditate about that. Just like, wow, she is just, this
like case they are like, she's doing nothing today. She's not cleaning. She's walking room to room
I'm just taking everyone down a peg just just for the sport of it
So then the deck answer outside and
Now yeah, yeah, yeah, asked is like what dies it and we're all like I'm die
I'm like there and there and there and there and there and
And now Ashton takes a page from Real Housewives of Melbourne.
And he pulls Riley aside.
He's like, can I give you just some friendly advice?
Which is like a total page out of Andres,
playbook from season one.
He's like, listen, just some friendly advice.
If I were you, I would cue a look with Kite, okay?
Like, you know, you just talk about radio talk.
It's a little fresh to someone who's above you.
You shouldn't do that, you know? And then she's like, what's your friendly advice for when it comes to how I'm talking to I'm a ship captain in Alaska
Yeah, it's like so you just take that and he's like, uh, yeah
Yeah, you should just take it. Well, that's not me. Okay, look. I care about break
Also, I don't give a fuck if someone wants to speak to me in that manner, okay?
I'm not gonna just sit down like a goddamn dog.
Like, actually, yeah, that's, like,
you can't say you give a fuck about rank,
but then you're not gonna take shit.
Yeah, exactly, because God said,
Chandler is such a piece of shit.
I'm gonna pick him in the face.
I'm fully on team Riley,
but she also, she needs to also like chill out a second. Okay. So 11 a.m.
a car comes by for for Caroline to take her to the doctor, you know, like, hi, we are, uh,
we're expecting a stew, not this red balloon toy. Oh, I'm sorry, you must be the patient.
You know, they're like, wow, the air back is on the inside of the car.
So weird.
So the wheel, uh, in the wheelhouse, they have a meeting about the new guests.
And it's Charles Yinn, smart phone breath, Lizer inventor.
And he definitely just goes, yeah, new money.
Yeah, yeah, new.
In case like new money is more it's bigger it's impatient
You know they haven't had luxuries yet, so they want it all right now because you know
They're new so the captain's like well they want to swim with stingrays and they want to sample our pig my cut geez
Yeah, yeah, I'm like already I'm like already like excited for the stingrays like they're like oh my god
It's our moment again. It's been ten years. So now we have a Keaton Josiah and they're just like hanging around and they're just again just talking shit and kids like
Do you think they'll have to cut off Caroline's leg?
Josiah's like you know what I don't want to hear I I don't want to hear I'm back and in the sound of her going
Following yourself across the floor. I was like this is so mean borderline like problematic and it is also hilarious I don't know any of the sound of her hobbling around the boat grabbing onto sinks
Stay upright. We all know she's gonna hang on to that ironing board for support and knock it over.
Man, great.
Can't wait to do that.
Can't wait to pick up the burning iron off her arm.
Well, I hope she gets better because her being sick makes my job harder.
Okay, I don't like it.
The captain's like, ah, all right, captain, everybody, everybody captain, everybody captain,
everybody, I'll be everybody Captain, everybody.
I'll be up in the crow's nest if you need me.
And it's like we get this sexy, sexy image of the Captain shirtless just laying in the
crow's nest.
Yeah, just crow's nest out.
He's just having some good old fashioned Captain Lee time.
It's like, what name do he,? She do as the cat captains do.
So some Chinese food arrives and Caroline is back.
And she has not had her leg amputated.
So that's good news for Josiah.
And Ashton's like, all you see,
I cups of worklaia die.
Which is exciting.
Yeah, it's gross.
Because you know, he had broccoli fart.
So it's like a very, you know, it's like, batterous sprayer, I guess. Yeah, he's gross because you know he had broccoli far. So it's like a very Oriss, you know, it's like batterousparagus. Yeah, he had broccoli everything everything gross. So then Kate
Tilted Caroline. She's like, so what was that? Caroline's like, um, she said it's like an infection
Exactly like how I'm here. I'm like you got yourself
Boom infection
Like you see a bug boom you can get an infections like really hurts. Okay, here's the
heart. Okay. Oh, also you'll be up at 6.30 in the morning. Okay, feel better. I don't
care whatever it is. Just be quiet about it. Actually, why Kate literally did say though after
Caroline said, it's an infection. Kate goes, gross. Oh, infections, yeah, everything can get infected, you know, like bad work ethic. Yeah, that can really infect a deck crew.
So Kate and Josiah are now cleaning, you know, and like, well, now that we have no Caroline, I guess we just have to pick up her infected ass now.
She should all bitter, etc.
Yeah, she's like, huh, fuck at me doing laundry feels great.
And then Caroline, who's been given some aspirin,
it's like boom, a boom.
I don't know, Caroline's in her own little world speaking.
I have the chef's like duck skin pizza.
Too bad I have to eat it alone.
They have this weird shots of the chef,
just like making himself a pizza
and then kind of eating alone and talking to himself.
It's like you could have had the Chinese food
I'm sure it's really good. I feel like Chinese food into heady is good
Okay, I'll go with you on that imaginary Chinese food. I mean just on geographical proximity. It's closer to China than we are and that logic
Should pan out right I guess not sure why not
And excuse to have more general sauce chicken I guess not. I'm with you. Why not? I'm with you. Why not? I argue about it.
And excuse to have more general sauce chicken.
Hey there.
I know what this podcast needs.
A map.
Let's go to commercial.
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So um, so now it's evening and Riley's like on the day,
actually chilling out and she's just like, I've just never had
this many problems on a boat.
I mean, I run my own boat.
Did I tell you I have my own boat?
I'm a captain my own boat.
I'm a fisherman.
I have a boat in Alaska.
It's like, okay.
Yeah.
Uh, so then Ashton is talking to the chef.
He's like, Hey, you doing chef's like, you know what? Because he's preparing all these chickens. He's like, how you doing? And chef's like, you know what?
Because he's preparing all these chickens.
And he's like, he just has a pile of chicken parts.
He's like, sometimes when you put your hand in the chicken,
like, oh, Ashton's like, really mate.
It's like bordering on disgusting.
And then he's like, well, I worked in my dad's barbecue
restaurant.
And like, it was scary because, you know, those chickens,
not my dad, the chicken.
And they'd like to stare at you.
And they'd hear that face.
Yeah, not my dad, chicken.
It was gross, you know.
Chubby.
I mean, I still have more pushing for the cushion,
which is, we have the way it's like backwards.
You know, I don't know.
The whole scene was just odd.
I'm like, pretty much anything with Adrian's, like, a little off, you know. I don't know. The whole scene was just odd. Yeah, pretty much anything with Adrian's like a little off.
Just strange. And what I like is that Ashton,
he's just at the point where he's just walking around this boat
frustrated with everyone. He just has this like
contained rage. He's just like, it's not how you do it.
It's not how you do it. That's not how you do it.
That's not how you do it.
That's not how you do it.
Because then, then the like, Ashen Ross and Chandler
are like hanging out in the bunk, being bros,
and Ashen's like, can you believe it?
Adrian doesn't even plan out his nails.
He just thinks about it on the fly.
Isn't that crazy?
They're like, ha ha ha ha.
And Chandler's like, yeah, I mean,
that's kind of like our deck program. Like, no one laughs.
They just stare at him.
It's not as cool when it comes to cleaning a boat as it is for coming up with a meal.
Yeah, he's a person of one.
Okay, team leader.
So they just stare at him and Jan was like, okay, so you guys want to start having a deck
meeting and he's like, um, yeah, but more instruction. Like, you know, you have to decide to have a deck meeting.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
So Riley comes to Kate and she's like, um, Kate, just wanted to apologize.
Cause like, I mean, I was out of line and Kate's like, oh, wow.
Thanks for that.
Yeah.
Thanks.
And then he goes, I love an apology, even an authentic apology, that's
that's actually even better because then you're really swallowing your pride. You're like,
so utterly humiliated, you're like, beyond humiliated, it's like Caroline doesn't even
come close to the humiliation that you feel right now. It's great. You know, it would
make this better if your head was in a toy that you like me to help you with that, Rally.
But to do that, we can do that.
How about I put your name on the crew mess cleanup list five times in a row in a bad
fun.
It's after.
Well, I mean, I am sorry.
Well, that's great.
You want to say it again?
That would be great.
Say it again.
Go ahead.
Do it again.
Do it again.
Here, why don't you stand by the door of our bunk and look up the staircase while Josanne
and I talk about you.
It's okay. It's like, thanks for that. by the door of our bunk and look up the staircase while Josiah and I talk about you.
Okay, it's like, thanks for that. Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow and the next day.
And the next day.
So the next morning, it's the deck deck meeting in the mess. All things are going to turn around for the deck crew right now at deck meeting
2018. So Chandler's like, all right, here's the meeting. When we're coming into Anchorage,
toys are going to come out. All right, because they want to soak in the Tahitian culture.
My dad is a boat captain and coolers should have stuff in it. I don't really care what
just basic things. All right all right, that enough.
Right now, if you guys, just give me 15 minutes.
Don't leave, just sit here and watch me sleep
and obviously sleep here.
And yeah, I just wanna keep grindin' on this meeting.
Yeah, okay, keep grindin'.
We need more core waters,
so can you just like get one from the fridge
and put it out on the deck?
And ask, and ask them like,
there's no substance to this meeting we need a
last the last of no game plan I need a game plan
there's a lack of direction it's a lack of direction it's like
swinging in a hand it's been not knowing which way you're gonna swing
can't at least I know someone's got me by the ass and the bowls that's all I need
listen all I need to be grad brother tank told what like, okay, you've been in the wrong business
for two months, okay.
At this point, I think you just need help transitioning
into a non-sexual workforce.
Yeah.
Meanwhile, Caroline comes like limping out of her door.
Yeah.
You know, her face is the size of a balloon.
And she's like, oh, my foot's still a horse.
And Josiah's like, is it broken?
Are you going to die?
No, let's keep working.
You stupid septic lady. Have you ever heard of the film My Left Foot because you played the piano
with it? So congratulations, your foot looks like a hemhawk. Now get to work.
Does it really even look swollen? I can't tell, because she keeps saying that, but I don't remember a big scary thing.
I think it wasn't scary swollen, but it was swollen.
I mean, I believe it hurt a lot.
I mean, it's an infection.
Like, I've had an infection by my toenail.
I once had a bad pedicure, and it got infected by the toenail.
It was so small, but when you step on that toe, it really hurt.
So I actually get it. Her foot's hurt her foot hurts. That sucks
Get over it get over it
So Caroline is talking to Chandler and she's like hey, Chandie. Oh, did you miss me? Did you miss me? He's like hmm?
Yeah, she goes. Hey, thanks, Chandie. I
Yeah, she goes, thanks, thanks, Channing. I am going to take a rest now.
Okay, bye.
It's like, I can't tell what's up with him.
Is there anything there?
I can't tell.
Get me something.
Like, the guy literally goes to sleep or says,
no, to you.
Like, what else now?
There's like, you've figured it all out.
You've seen all the, oh, we should mention, by the way,
did you see this?
Chandler is actually dating Jamie from below deck met.
Oh, yeah, I saw that. Yeah, fascinating.
Anyways, good luck with that.
He'll be like chocolate milk again.
Well, the best part about chocolate milk is it makes me tired. I'm gonna take a rest, Jamie.
Hold on. That does have to suck when you're dating somebody before the show even begins.
And then the show begins and the world just hates your boyfriend.
I know.
And if he has to come on, he gets like defensive and starts fighting with people about it.
And I'm like, you're not gonna win this.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
And like, congratulations.
Your new relationship has already ruined.
I know. Poor Jamie.
So guess start to arrive and everyone lines up in their whites and captain leaves like okay everyone do this shake
You've lose the shade take off your shades and then they cut to captain league reading everyone with his sunglasses on
So they come in yeah, I love that guy so they come in and the you know
I know that I'm gonna hate this fucking guy okay the main guy cuz that's the sound of,
it's selfie time.
Social media time.
And Fender Zaya goes, I'm already over it.
So they're getting a tour of the place
and everything is selfie.
They're already selfie.
Every single one of them has their phones out
and they're like videotaping and selfieing
every single thing that's happening.
Yeah, it's like the worst thing ever.
It's like, I'm not opposed to social media.
I'm just I feel bad for the people who actually follow them,
who just like go on to their IG story and it's just a series of like a thousand tiny little dots.
Like, oh, here's a, here's a nice like left to right pan through a yacht.
And here's another left to right pan in the same room from a slightly different angle.
And here's a third one but now it's
a selfie.
You know following the most basic people and so he's Instagramming and she's Instagramming
and he's like oh my god I'm Instagramming her and Instagramming.
Oh look the captain's behind me right now.
The guy is behind another guy goes.
Reframe, reframe.
All right everybody hold, hold and he's doing like one of those full panorama shots. He's like hold it was
Awesome it was it was actually such a brilliant moment of editing because they
They stopped all the music for it and and they just the cameras actually just held on that guy while he did this long long long shot and it was like longer
than you'd ever expect it would be and the fact that that the editors just let it ride
was amazing.
Well, these people are discussing Leafs has for their cell phones and social, but I'm
here for it because it's the next level of Darwin's natural selection.
And unfortunately they're going to win on that sad part.
Who is these people? No, they'll be fucking dead in a crosswalk.
They're those people who are like,
self-ing in a crosswalk and get hit by a bus.
Yeah, well, we can only hope.
So then the guy, then we get our anchor drawbacks like,
All right, up, reverse it alright up reverse shackle reverse shackle anchor is up anchor is up now let's get those
fenders going so Riley starts dragging a fender across the deck and Chandler's like
Riley oh how many times I tell you don't drag the fenders she's like um I was just bringing
the fenders you said bring the fenders so bring the fenders but She's like, um, I was just bringing the fenders. You said bring the fenders
So bring the fenders, but can you hold a fender by yourself? No, so now you're dragging and now you know
I hate watching fenders dragged across the deck and she's like, well, I
I have my own boat. I have my own boat
He's like wait for somebody to help you. She's well, I'm gonna just want with two hands and then I guess I'll wait
I'm like oh my god this girl like refuses. Yeah, and then she goes and then she's got something very millennial
She goes Chandler's really good at telling me what I do wrong and not what I do right. I'm like you're on a boat
No one's gonna tell you what you do right unless it's sarcastic by Kate. Oh
Wow, Riley you're really holding that fender well. I'm sure it won't ruin the deck at all
So then the guests are ordering from Caroline and they're like um can we have shots and the guys like can I have an orange
Ryan do you know like the outside of an orange?
She's like okay, I like did you know she was like taking the orders like a party game like she's playing Windows or draw or something
She kept pointing at people like you
Okay, you that's close. Oh no, you, okay, take it off.
Okay, someone flick me.
Oh, I'm spinning, I'm spinning, okay you.
It's like making it so much harder on herself
and then they're trying to make it
like these people are being so difficult,
but they're really not.
They ordered shots and then the lady's like,
can I have a lemon water? She's like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh she just had a several several operations. Oh wait, I'm sorry
We confused her with the actual man from the game operation
And then one of the girls cuz um man ask about your toe. I understand if it's personal check
I ask about your toe. I understand if it's personal. Check. Oh, my toe.
I mean, why am I wobbling around out here on one side?
No, she's, it's a mosquito bite.
I mean, I'm going to deal with it though, because I'm a trooper.
And it is my over matter.
It is. I'm going to be. Oh, God.
Yeah. It's just a mosquito bite that just got, you know, intensely infected and I may have to lose my ankle or my entire leg.
It's to me the gangrene hasn't spread all the way up to my brain, but you know I'm sure you'll have a wonderful vacation anyway.
Uh-huh. What sort of infection can I get for you?
What's a mosquito bite? What's polio?
You know what I mean? What is bird flu?
My number matter, guys.
You know what? Honestly, it's a very happy thing
because being bitten by that mosquito means that like,
someone wanted to bite me and that meant a lot to me.
So Chandler's like, all right guys,
I think we're gonna take some time to relax.
Just the boys and the Ashton's like,
you wanna call Riley down?
Cause she's still up
They're doing stuff and he's like I don't care. I'm gonna give you the same way
I'm gonna tell you the same thing I told my dad when they said dad
I'm gonna follow in your footsteps. I don't give a fuck. Okay, how about that?
I mean, maybe if she didn't drag vendors on the deck then I could maybe she can take a rest
But that was kind of like a rest
in and of itself so. I know he doesn't like Rally but it's starting to affect his professionalism.
Like he's taking ten maps today okay I don't think that this professionalism is really there to be
affected with just move it on so the guys are like solidarity, wicked, awake as well. So they
march up the stairs to work with Riley and shrug herger down there. It's just shrugging like all the eats and app or something. Yeah, it's bad when the guys the the bros are now
They seem to be
Viering towards team Riley so that's gonna be bad for Chandler
So meanwhile Caroline is trying to pour these shots at tequila and she's like pours like a little bit tequila in the glass
And chose I was like you know you dumb fuck you can pull more into the glass than that, don't you?
I know, I know, I don't need you to help me, I don't need it!
I said, then pull more.
No, I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine!
I wasn't so sure.
Well, if you need something, just let me know.
So he walks off and then she's like,
Oh shit!
She has to go downstairs because she has to get the orange right or something.
So then the shots are just sitting there.
And Kate who clearly was hiding behind the draperies comes sauntering out and was like,
huh? Kate to the boat, Kate to the boat. There's some shots that you kill up here,
poured not to their maximum capacity. Should I bring them down? Like, what should I do with them?
It feels weird that they're just standing here. Does anyone want to respond? Perhaps someone who has an infection and their extremities?
I just need to know who ordered the shots of Half-Ass. Yeah, I wonder who was lazy enough that they could poor
Part of a shot, but then not do the rest of it and bring it up to the guests.
Like, um, yeah, I know that their shots came. I was
With guests and I'm down here getting warned right now
Oh, I just oh, good.
I, uh, I just need to spoon.
I just need to spoon and just I was like, I've got us being right here.
You stupid idiot.
And it doesn't have your infection juices on it.
I think Kate tells Josiah, um, I want you on service.
She gets flustered just by life, you know.
So she's like, um, they're asking for tequila shots, which is easier than a bottle of water.
Okay, I get that she has elephant Titus on her foot, but
do your job.
She does this like anti-sweared fingers move with her hands.
She's like, the sun's rising on two different
Do your job.
Yeah, so Caroline finally brings the tequila shots out to the guests. sends Ryze on two different. Oh, I'm just like, do your job. Yeah.
So Caroline finally brings the tequila shots out to the guests.
Somehow it does not drop them.
And the guests, they're even Instagramming Caroline,
bringing them shots.
Like, this is not good content.
It's good content on below deck.
It's not good content on your IG feed.
Well, especially when they're like, oh, look how our waiter sucks.
Because it's like, they're like, where is he?
Where are soft? Where are soft? And she comes out and he's like, hold on, hold on. Oh, yeah, here she comes.
Yeah, here she comes. She comes wobbling.
He's like, oh, infection. I mean, at the same time, also, don't complain how long your shots are taking.
And then when they finally arrive, slow it all down so that way you can take an IG shot
Good No, I just say they went to the fridge
What?
That guy's a prick. I don't like him with his little Instagramming and now his Instagramming is getting mean
Like it feels mean the soul thing with Caroline don't mean to me. Yeah, I agree
So they arrive in Mariah and they drop the anchor and everything and uh, I just like
it's starting to rain a little bit and Captain is like, eh, well a little sun shower, how
about that?
Uh-huh.
Decided to throw a little sun, little ring, just give it all to us, but you know what though?
God dammit, I love the splendor of weather.
And then Ashton is totally anti-chambler because Chandler's like, oh, gotta get the toys out.
Just do it, just do it.
Riley don't angle that.
Yeah.
Aight, ah.
And Ashton's like, every pet has a procedure
of how to get the toys out.
There's a certain order.
And he doesn't want order.
He wants it all out.
He wants it out now.
I mean, you can't take off your G string
before you take off your pants, can you?
He he he. I tried one time and I almost got, you know, another whole.
It's not how you do it.
Alright?
Yeah, so, um, now lunch is served, some coconut infused carrots, and some scared snapper
and some sort of fish tartar, and they're all eating it, and they're loving it.
And then there's like this random shot of captain Lee just eating an apple in the crew
of mass, he's just like, and I just love the weird existential on we the Captain
Lee has been in all season long, just in different rooms, doing things alone, just staring
off, perhaps eating an apple. Yeah. What is life after all? Yeah. And then Carol comes
after serve while everybody's self being. And the guys like, you got this, you got this.
I got it.
He's like, are you sure?
Hold on.
Hold on.
And he starts taking selfies of her.
Because she's such a mess.
So he's terrible.
And the chef's like, I really think
it's too bad when people go too deeply into social.
Like when there's a sunset, let your phone down.
Enjoy the sunset.
I also hate those people.
Yeah. It's like you can't win with me.
I hate the people who are on their phone the whole time,
but I also hate the people who are like sunset.
Why would I take a picture of that?
I know.
I know.
I agree with that.
I hate the people who are overly obsessed
and I hate the people who feel that they're cooler
because they are under obsessed with such.
Like, I want to say say find a happy medium,
but I also hate happy mediums.
I feel like you should be talking to ghosts if you're happy.
You should be able to do something.
Unhappy, yeah.
I feel like if you see a sunset that you like,
take a picture or two and then put it away and enjoy it.
But don't be like, didn't take the photo, you know,
like that, I will say at concerts,
it is really annoying when people just sit there and record the concert because you're never gonna capture it
And you're usually just getting in someone's way like you are gonna be taking a grainy photo and the music can be blown out
So like don't bother recording it like take take some still photos of like the the the grandeur of the
venue and then just like enjoy the music because it's more like
You're making bad content like if you're at it's more like you're making bad content.
Like if you're at the very least,
if you're taking a thousand photos of a sunset,
at least there'll be a lot of beautiful photos of a sunset.
But if you're just doing like a million videos.
Yeah, no one needs to see your shitty seat at Beyonce.
You know what I mean for an hour later.
Oh my goodness, please, everyone stop.
So everyone's out on their jet skis
and Chandler's like, Riley, please, everyone. So everyone's out on their jet skis and Chandler's like, Riley,
Riley, made me buy the crew entrance.
Please.
All right.
Now here's what's going to happen.
Gentlemen, we're going to put out the slide because Riley's a woman.
And so she's probably not going to be able to do that.
So I'm going to break her because I don't want her ruining our slide performance.
Yeah.
Because the last thing we need is her learning how to do things.
That way she can do things and we can take breaks.
If anyone teaches Riley to read on this trip, they're out.
Okay.
So he, he, he sent her on break and then she's annoyed about it.
She's like,
Chandler always makes me go on break the worst time.
And now I'm not gonna have it in sleep.
And it's like, she doesn't give me a break when I really need it. Which I was like I don't
know any supervisor is give anyone a break when they need it but in this case I
can actually understand that because he probably is like a real dick like if
she's exhausted and like fall on the job.
Yeah, she's on the water, you know, so she's not gonna just be able to go lay
down. It's like okay well have fun taking your shower and you're back on back immediately
Like he's just torturing her so then then then Kate Kate meanwhile Spina breaks Kate is like she sees Caroline. She's like
I'm gonna go on break. Oh, by the way. How's your foot and Caroline's like it hurts. That was a rhetor question. Thank you
I meant to ask your foot how it feels being on you. Yeah
Oh I meant to ask your foot how it feels being on you. You want to put the answer? The same answer.
Painful.
So she's like, oh, there's only the night she has you.
Because we need three stews doing their jobs.
Okay. And girl, I was like, whoa, but can I at least take five minutes to put eyes on my butt?
She says, oh, well, look at here.
Here's nice machine. So can you just stand right here and do it right here?
Yeah.
Caroline's like, I guess really wasn't a question.
Bye.
So Caroline is coming for everybody on social.
Like Caroline's not taking any of this very well, OK,
in real life, right now in the present.
And she's coming.
She's like yelling at everybody every week on social media. And finally Kate answered her back. And she's coming, she's like yelling at everybody every week on social media.
And finally Kate answered her back.
And she's like, Caroline, seriously,
I'm not even doing anything.
Like just leave me alone.
She's like, oh really?
Oh really?
And she's like, then she's going after the captain.
And he's like, oh, she's well, okay, Caroline.
Well, thanks a lot for the tweets.
She's like, I've tried to contact you for eight months and nothing and now you want to say thing. No, thank you, Captain.
Oh,
he's lost her fucking marbles and it's wonderful. I love.
I love us to who's gone bonkers. It's just a great. It's a great dynamic. It's great. It's great for the show. It's great for social media. It's great for America
It's great for Halloween
So spooky I'm an address of like Tara Tara line tonight and I'll be like walking through West Hollywood
Infection I think for my friends watch you so so I could actually be bravo things
They would understand because I don't take care of my wig
It's very well. They're all on the back and of course I have a red shoulder length wig like Caroline that would totally look like right
I don't even need to come it just like Caroline waking up, you know, yeah
I would love to be I wonder if I dressed up like captain Lee if I could find the last minute yacht uniform and then put some sort of like fake white beard on my
Face if people would recognize
me or just think I was doing some weird like fetish.
Weird fetish.
Like a weird like daddy-
Captain fetish.
Captain, you know, man in uniform fetish.
And crap and crap and crap and crap.
Yeah, it's relevant there.
Yeah.
Okay, so nap time.
So everyone starts hearing these noises.
It's like ding dong ding dong. Yeah! Okay, so nap time. So everyone starts hearing these noises.
It's like ding dong, ding dong.
BONG BONG!
Recrashing, because someone to find out if we're correct.
Or Caroline, is that you giving a monologue?
I'm like, no, I hear it too!
I'm like, no.
All right, but oh, look, it's a video system.
Someone's calling from the master.
No one is used that yet.
Yeah, exactly.
So Kate goes downstairs. I'm like, well,
I'm just going to go down to this master suite and just knock on the door and surely someone
dressed appropriately will address me and make a request and it'll be as simple as that.
And Instagram penis. Wow. Okay. That's, you don't need to order a pizza and then after the door naked, okay? You know how I was coming
This is
So he's like can I have a smoothie? Yeah
Yeah, so this guy is disturbing on many levels at this point
Because he can't really tell what's going on with him. Yeah, because like
Okay, so he's a big social media guy, but now he's like a little bit of an exhibitionist
we've discovered, because he opens the door naked
and asks for like two smoothies.
So Kate is already like,
she's like making, that's like how her blender sound.
It's like,
the fighting case.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha the fighting case. Yeah. Yeah. So let's see here.
So she delivers the, she delivers the, she delivers the, the, the smoothies and is like
thoroughly disgusted with these people.
Yeah.
Um, so Chandler is like, uh, Ashden, Ashden, I'm gonna need your hand with the slide.
And someone says, switch channels on your radio.
Who says that?
Chandler?
I think it was Chandler.
Yeah.
Um, uh, he decides that he wants to switch frequencies because he just wants to.
So they're gonna take, they're gonna roll up the slide, et cetera.
And while that's happening, we see Adrian purring something in the kitchen,
which I only mentioned because he has the same kitchen towel that I do.
And I felt like a huge amount of connection to the show after that.
And then we see Caroline and she is just like in pain.
She's like, I'm still in pain and I, I don't know how to shut it down.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Just imagine Josiah on the side.
I'm like, how about we start with a ball, gag. I know how we to shut it down. I don't know. I don't know. Just imagine Josiah on the side. You're like, how about we start with a ball gag?
I know how we can shut it down. I've got a bagel knife here.
It's called a chloroform.
So yeah, so Chandler goes off the frequency and then of course now everyone needs him.
So we see Kate go. Chandler, Chandler them so we see Kiko Chandler Chandler
Kate Chandler Chandler Kate Kate Chandler Chandler Kate and then Captain here so he's
like Chandler Chandler Lily and maybe having one of those meetings we're gonna talk about
their feelings. Actually I think they're on a different radio.
It's like, uh, they change the frequency.
You think you can just come on my boat and change the goddamn frequency
whenever you got them want.
No.
Wrong.
Wrong.
Wrong.
Uh, so.
She just begins.
She just starts.
She just starts.
She just starts.
She just starts.
She just starts. She just starts. She just starts. She just starts. They have 100 people. Do you turn off your frequency when you want to do something on the boat?
We have one answer on the board. Chandler, you're up.
What do you say?
Survey, say, take it home.
All right.
Do you turn off your frequency, Chandler?
Yes.
Wrong, wrong.
Donkey up a hill to a Southwest outlet that can take you back home
you a plinko. So finally they get a hold of him and he's like what is it? What
is it? And Captain goes, Kate wanted you for something and then Kate's like, I
figured it out. I was gonna ask you how do we attach Caroline to the anchor before we
put it down but not stand now, so thanks for wasting my time
So what are we how we could change Caroline's batteries?
Anybody know how to fix a personality nope. Okay, go back onto your other frequency things
Captain Lee is like you know something bad happens
I need to get everyone to their mustard stations and you're not available are you fucking kidding me?
And you could just see Carolyn be like there's a mustard station now a mustard mustard
you stupid idiot.
Oh god she really is terrible.
So Kate and Josiah are setting the dinner for dinner for dinner.
They're setting the table for dinner and she's like, um, it's a property thing meeting
because they're growing so let's make it fun.
Speaking of, here's Caroline after a video.
Yeah, she's like, let's make it fun. We're gonna have some horns and Josiah's face like,
you know, we can't use the horns, it has a foot infection.
Oh, I'm sorry. Confused there for a moment.
What was a horn? What was a stew?
I like Blake and I eyes my foot. What was a hole in it? What was it to? Like click so then the captain and Chandler Chandler goes up to the captain's room or whatever or the wheelhouse
I'm like
Sorry to bother you, but I really wanted to apologize for earlier
my dad was a captain and
You know captain dad dad captain captain dad I like I like
I like
I like
I like
I like
I like
I like
I like
I like
I like
I like
I like
I like
I like
I like I like
I like
I like
I like
I like I like
I like
I like I like I like I like I tangled up but she's sort of acting like it's a snake so she's like, oh, it's weird like convulsions trying to get the wire through her shirt.
Then we get the obligatory shot of Chandler going, all right everyone, I'm knocking off.
So he's sitting there having a bowl of chocolate ice cream in the crew mess and Caroline's
like, hey, you have a second
He's like, I'm not here. We're like no, we know that you have no personality, but you actually physically are here
She's like, oh my god. It's like I'm in it. It's like you playing me in a scene with game shows. Hey, come on
Thanks, I appreciate that dick dick
So now she starts getting really mad and she's like, I just
will ask you for a second to help me about oh, I know you're super busy. I mean, I don't know what your issue is and goes
Likewise
Live a day in the life of a deck hand and go understand
So then let's see here Riley is still or Riley comes back and she's a
god, I missed him. I missed have to work with you guys. I guess I'll stay up and
finish this because you know I took a break. It's like I was put on a break
forever. And Ross said, it's good. I don't shit that anywhere. It was terrible.
Yeah. And so the deck hands are now, they're all together,
complaining about how they're having these super long days.
They're not having any time to go on a break.
And meanwhile, Kate is like devising a plan
to put some flower crowns on Ashton's.
The usual sort of like evening time scuttle butt.
And Caroline, meanwhile, is truly like going nuts down
and like since Chandler has said that he's not gonna help her,
she's now just like blowing her lid her foot hurts. She feels crazy and now she's had enough
So she finally is like can one of the decans clean the crew mess
I don't have to iron the middle of all these fucking
Why are you ironing in the crew mess anyway?
I'm right at least like I'll do it. It's like not you okay
It's aston's day. It's on the not you. Okay. It's Astin's day.
It's on the list.
So Astin comes in and he's like, what's up?
I want to know what it's wrong with you guys.
And he's like, we've been working all day.
She is, oh, really?
Have you?
Have you been working all day?
What's that like?
And he's like, I'm not going to have this conversation with your book in a loony tune. When when he walks off they beat him out. What did he say?
I don't know something like that all I know is I could see his internal rage just go to a whole new level like his eyes get
Just like squintier and he's just like
Yeah, he's losing it and she's like you act like your job is more important than what we do. I'm like well, they like
You know like they do don't make the vote stop movie.
You know, put the vote in the back and you're ironing.
So.
So, uh, so now a Caroline, Caroline finally is like, I, she's like, you know what,
I used to think that Chandler was cute, but not really.
He's just a dick.
So she realizes that her emotions have been misplaced.
So she goes and she apologizes to Ashton and he's like,
now I'll see what he, you know, I'll take the apology,
but now I got a glimpse into what it'd be like to date her.
And she's crazy.
She's really crazy.
I mean, also, I'll still bang her.
I'll bang her all night long, but she's crazy.
So let's see, Ashton and Ross, one of them's getting ready because Ashton's like forced
to be the stripper now at all times.
And we're also like stick out that stomach so I can see what you look like.
Oh yeah, bro.
And he like slap.
That's it.
Yeah.
He caps a feel.
He full on cops a feel on the Ashton stomach.
Good for him.
And then Ashton's like, what there's a pattern here.
What play Dresset? Why is it always me? Like, because you work out too much. Okay. good for him. And then Ashton's like what this a pattern here what play dress up
why is it always me like because you work out too much okay that's that's what you get. Yeah
exactly you former you formerly were in a profession where you played dress up and then dress down okay
and on top of that this is the second you know this is the second stripper turned deckhand
and then we also had from season one
We had a gay porn star turned deckhand so there's like a really great pattern that's developed on the show
I like it. Yeah, there you go
I mean, I think it's like going down and it seems like a weird trajectory but whatever
Well, we also Bruno who was a deckhand then turned into an only fans
Model a.k. Yeah
who was a deckhand then turned into an only fans model. A.K.
Yeah, he went the other way.
Yeah, I would think he's more of a normal way to go.
Yeah.
You know, where you're like, I'm sick of cleaning toilets.
I'm doing porn.
You know, it seems weird to go from.
I'm doing porn.
I think I'm going to go clean toilets instead.
It seems like a different way.
I guess it depends on who you've been matched within your scenes. So, um,
so now, uh,
Caroline has to, like, go clean the master suite or something and there's a full on used condom on the bedstand and they it's like
as Caroline says and I think it's an apt description. It's juicy.
Ah!
This is disgusting. This is disgusting.
Disgusting.
So she's like um ashton. Can you come here? I need you to help me. It's a cool damn
But now I've got a strip of Caroline and Lynn in the room. So come here. Come here. Okay. Would you go get that thing off the
Out tonight, San is like
Well, he doesn't even notice that first is like all right
I guess I'll take this strangely shaped tissue that looks like a mountain made at latex and has
Fluids on I guess I'll pick this up in my bag and she's like no stop the joke went too far.
So, um, so then the guests decide, so they're having dinner and everything and the guests decide
that they want to go fishing, um, uh, tomorrow morning. Uh, they're going to wake up early to go
fishing and Riley is excited because she's like, this is okay, this is what I do. This is professionally. I am a fisherman. This is what I love to do and I can teach them,
et cetera. And as soon as she's excited about it, I'm like, yeah, Chandler's not going to let her.
Yeah, she's like, yeah, it's time to hook some wicked tuna.
And then so she goes up to wake him up, which is never the way to get what you want.
Okay. With someone that doesn't like you already.
Because Ross suggests, because Chandler is asleep, because he's going to be on the early
duty.
So Ross suggests that Riley wake up Chandler and say, hey, I'll do the early duty tomorrow
and then Chandler will stay up on the lights.
So that's so Riley goes and she like, well, that's their plan.
And before she goes in there there we go back upstairs and
Astro and comes out like in his like Dehesion beef cake costume and he comes out like bringing like a cake or whatever it is
And they don't even notice they're like fully consumed but taking photos of the food
Yeah, and he's like well, I thought we'd add some to heach and flavor to this meal. They're like wow
So he just goes back and five. He's like, all right. I played to risk it for nothing
I was mad that I was being used as a piece of meat
And now I'm mad that I wasn't being used as a piece of meat. I mean, what the hell?
That's the risk of being a piece of meat. It's like when a go-go dancer doesn't get the chips
It's like I want it to be a piece of meat and now I'm nothing
So Riley is like, um, Chandler, hi, you mean to wake you up? You mean to wake you? And he's like, yeah, uh,
fishing. Okay, this sounds perfect for not a woman. Okay, awesome. Have anyone with the
penis meet me on deck at six. And she's like, uh, yeah. So she has to tell Ashton that
Ashton will be the one going fishing at 6 in the
morning and Ashton has just worked the entire day without any breaks which has been like
an ongoing pattern with him because Chandler doesn't know how to schedule his deck hands.
It works them to the ground while he takes all the breaks.
So he's exhausted and he's ready to like wake up at probably like 8 a.m. and now he finds
out that he has to wake up, he has to be on deck like 8 a.m. and now he finds out that he has to wake up,
he has to be on deck at 6 a.m. to go fishing, which he knows nothing about.
Yeah, I'm so who's pissed. So they're we ended everybody.
Well it ends with Ross saying, you know what, if we don't get any wrist, we're going to start
making mistakes and then they cut to Chandler's sleeping and I think this is foreshadowing for that
shot in the trailer when it looks like Ross is the one who gets pulled off the boat.
Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun.
And dies.
So that was below deck.
Why don't we turn over to the listener spotlight. Um, to do this, if you support us on Patreon at the listener spotlight level or above,
we turn the podcast over to you for about two minutes.
We recently asked our listener spotlight people, hey, um, who is your favorite Broadway celebrity,
who do you hate, who is like underrated, etc. So here we have Shannon
out of a can and Anthony with her. Shannon Oshanan, here we go.
Hi Ronnie and Ben, this is Shannon out of a can and Anthony and this is my listener spotlight.
Actually, this is my eighth attempt at recording my listener spotlight and I had to take a shot
of tequila just to keep going. I don't know how you guys do this five times a week
Anyway, first the formalities my favorite bravo star Erica Jane
I want to be her or skin her and wear her like last year's Versace my least favorite Thomas Revanell hands down
Or should I say mayor hands down?
Most overhyped might be levied countess Luan. I love you girl, but don't believe your own PR
It's not a good look.
Most underappreciated?
Watch what crappens.
I watch more bravo shows now, just so I can listen to your recaps.
They should pay you guys a commission seriously.
Now that that's out of the way, there are two other things I'd like to address.
First, it's the live shows.
I know you guys are tired of showing your shows, so let me do that for you.
Since November of last year, I've attended four of your shows, two in San Francisco, one in Irvine, and the Golden Crappies.
If you haven't gone to a live show yet, please do yourself a favor and go. I promise you won't regret
it, and please don't worry about going alone. You will be surrounded by the kindest people and you
will instantly make friends. I promise. Speaking of friends, that brings me to the second thing I
wanted to talk about.
I want to personally thank you both for creating this community of fans through your podcast.
I have met the most amazing people both online and in person and it's all because you brought us
together. I want to give a special shout out to my tribe, the Watchfoot Crappens Bay Area Beaches.
Ken, Meena, Nicole, Nancy, Danielle, Risa, Stephanie, Lane, MC, and Aaron.
Life is better with you all in it.
I love you guys and thanks Ben and Ronnie for making it happen.
I love you both and I can't wait to see you at the crappies.
Oh, I love you, girl.
Yeah.
It's so sweet.
I love that lady.
And by the way, Shannon, you're like, it took me eight times.
You did a great job.
That was like, you like read, you read that like a,
like a professional podcaster.
So good job on that area.
Betches are a really good group of people.
They came to the last San Francisco show,
which was a Southern night show.
Southern charm.
It was Southern, oh yeah, Southern charm gay pride show.
And they came in different colored shirts like rainbow.
The colors of the rainbow.
And they had to line up to do it.
And it was the lyrics from the Southern Charm thing.
It was awesome.
Yeah, they are super, super supportive.
They travel.
I think a bunch of them are coming to our Charleston show.
They really, they really travel for us, which is like above and beyond.
And that's, it's just really, it's, it just really cool to know that the podcast has created
these communities of friends and stuff, and it's like a really cool thing that happens
with all podcasts these days.
So it's cool to see it happening with our peeps, and it's nice.
It really is nice when you see solo people come to our shows, and they make friends with
people, because sometimes we'll be doing our meet and greet before the show, and they'll be someone who's there like, I came alone and then by the end of
the show you see they've made like some friends and like that's a really nice feeling. There's
there's something really rewarding about like finding your people you know and it's cool that all
these podcasts and all these different areas are really helping people do that. Yeah, baby, we love you Shannon out of a can of Anthony.
Yeah, see you in January.
We'll be back tomorrow with the Real Housewives
of Dallas recap and go get your tickets for Seattle,
which is in November and the Nashville in December.
Go get your Ramona, Christmas and Hanukkah t-shirts
over at WatchWitCrapins.com
and we will see you guys tomorrow!
Happy Halloween!
Bye, I love you, suckers!
Bye!
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