Watch What Crappens - BelowDeckMed: Wedgie-pers Creepers
Episode Date: July 26, 2017The Malia love triangle reaches new lows (or highs?) as a drunken wedgie causes waves of drama on "Below Deck Mediterranean." We've got it all covered on today's episode; so you better liste...n! LATER SKATER! Plus, Listener Spotlight! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts!
It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates.
Cameras off! Voice only!
Launching during Pride!
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Hey everyone, happy hump day!
Welcome to watch our crappens,
a podcast about all that crap on Bravo
that we just love to talk about.
I'm Ben Mandelker from,
where am I from?
BsideBlog.com and the Banch of Blender,
I almost said I'm Ben Mandelker from The Watcher Crappens.
I'm like, no, this is Watcher Crappens.
And joining me is a man who has also competed
for Malia's heart and who has won, I don't know,
but I have a wedgie now.
It's Ronnie Caram from TrashTalkTV.com
and Rose Pricks
Bachelor of Podcast. What's going on?
Oh, hello, man. Hello, hello, hello. We made it to Wednesday. I love our Wednesday
shows because we have, we do Blow Deck Med, which means we get to do all sorts of crazy
accents, excuse me, accents. And then afterwards, we do our listener spotlight. So, you know,
it's just a great way to spend a Wednesday. Oh my gosh, it sure is. I just always live sitting here talking
to you, baby. Can you believe it's been a week? Can you believe it girls? It's been a week
since our live show in New York City. I'm just starting to feel somewhat normal again.
Yeah. For those of you guys who missed a live show or just want to relive it or want to
pretend you were there, we've actually done two bonus episodes today for this week for Patreon.
The first one is all about our time in New York City together and the part of the things
that we did.
And then the second episode, I talk extensively about various minutia in the Hamptons, including
a trip to the summer house of Bravovo's famed show summer house.
And then we talk about other things too, as usual we go off into any other areas.
If you want to listen to those go to patreon.com slash watch or crap ends
and support at the bonus episode level which is like a dollar per episode.
And enjoy.
Yeah, details.
I'm really excited to get almost Bola.
Doc Amid. I'm really excited to get almost below doc Mead
Yes, yes, let's let's let's catch up with our with our our yaddies in Croatia
Hell yeah, boo. Yeah, so below dick made here. We are beginning of my gigantic page of notes huge huge page of notes
We open with Adam
This might be from last week. I'm not sure, but he's like, they don't
understand that there's a massive backstory between Malia and I. You fucked at Yarding Camp.
Okay. You're not massive, sir. Yeah. You fucked at Yarding Camp. You, you know, you talked about
maybe getting a hotel room in Santorini. Maybe you got a hotel room in Santorini,
then you got onto a yacht, you made out some more
and then we're like, oh, let's get another hotel room.
Massive story.
Massive.
Like this is no Lord of the Rings trilogy, okay?
Yeah, they're kidding.
Shut up, Adam, you got a beabes at camp.
So I like that this show has a synthesizer drama. It always cracks the music on this show cracks me up because sometimes on bravo
It's like do they have a full fucking orchestra in there like southern
And then sometimes you're like who what monkey are they paying with the synthesizer because it's like
It's a
Dillard's commercial or a scary scene. I don't know what's
happening. Kind of those has a Dillard's commercial ever
fail to terrify you. I don't think so. And the big drama when
we get to it is Bobby going with Malion has back. It's like
yes, this is a very suspenseful scene. Thank you.
Will he drop her?
Will he drop her?
Will this piggyback go wrong?
So they're all drunk in a square in like Dubrovicechekovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovakovak They're playing around and this is when we sort of relive the end of last episode when one Adam's like, Hey, oh, yeah, bro, I'm gonna give you a wedgie so he gives Wes a wedgie and Wes is like,
I can't believe you just did that.
You just ripped my entire underpants.
You ripped my underpants.
He just ripped everything.
Adam, bro.
Rip.
Yeah.
Well, then that's a bro-waysha.
Yeah.
So that's when Wes knocks himself on the out of Adam's hand and then Adam like
Slaps West's cheek and then all hell breaks loose. Yeah, I mean, he's like
What now you're getting no lean tense. I'm like, oh Adam. Oh Adam
So that phone tosses and you got a hand it to him because he's got like the full on
Coding on his phone where nothing will break it and
make sure iPhone like 30 inches bigger but it never breaks.
Yes.
Because that should have shattered.
I was really rooting for an iPhone shatter.
Yeah.
But it didn't.
And then Hannah's like, we's, we's, we's, let's give for a walk.
We come on.
He's like, he ripped me one C.
He ripped me one C.
He just ripped everything. He rippedie. He ripped me onesie. He just ripped everything, everything, he ripped everything.
I'm like, it was a fruit of the loom pair of underwear, okay?
Come here.
Then Hannah starts the psychologist timer
and she's like, listen, this is not a bad awaygy.
Yeah.
Who gives wedgies, by the way, when you're in your 30s?
Who does that?
Adam, I mean, look, Adam's chasing like a young girl.
And he's saying things like, later skater.
Yeah.
And Bugsie pulls Moliad to the side.
And it's like, Moliad, Adam is not the Glyphi.
The way that he mistreats phones. Adam's like I thought it was a joke.
He didn't think it was a joke.
Come on, it's a joke in America to joke, buddy.
Joke and Wes is like he jumped in front of a car.
He spoke badly to locals and now he rips my pants.
It's not acceptable.
Nor did all.
That is three men of strikes.
There's a difference between being a rebel and being an asshole.
On a rebel, he's an asshole.
So, I'm so sorry I just have this at the bottom for some reason, but Wes goes.
Trying to get someone's underpants over the head, it's almost a personal attack.
It's literally a personal attack. It's literally a personal attack.
Every time he steps on a grape, I know what he's thought someone food the loom.
It's rude.
It's rude.
Can't do that to the food of a little people.
So they're a fruit.
It's a good one, Adam.
And I bet you love to loom, don't you?
Draw.
I'm taking that shuttle right through the threads back and forth.
Good old loom boy.
That's what I'm going to call you.
Oh, so back in the boat, Adam does what he does whenever he's extremely happy,
extremely sad or extremely anything, which is pick up a trash bag and start going
a trash bag.
It's like his like his putting his hair behind his ears when he's nervous, you know, going shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh sh shh shh shh sh sh shh shh sh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh shh sh and Bob is like, oh, I didn't see it. I was busy literally digging my own boxers out of my ass.
She's like, oh, so you got a wedgie too?
What?
No, they're just there.
Someone got voted wedgie, who?
It should have been me.
It's like no one even sees me when I have a wedgie.
I'm invisible.
So Adam follows West, but he's still drunk
and he's doing his, you know, trash bag thing, which everyone knows is the sign of danger.
And he's like, what? What? What is it? Where's his like, what? And he's like, what?
What? What? What? He's like, I don't want to talk about it, Adam.
He's like, where is this sense of humor? Oh, wedgie!
Is it because I gave you a wedgie? I'm like, yeah motherfucker. It's not like you just like tapped him on the shoulder
You gave him a wedgie, okay? It's it's like humiliating and uncomfortable
And then of course Max. He's like has his finger on the pulse of nothing. It's like
Like you didn't get your fucking underwear pull that yeah
And in your face you weren't driving a golf carts
or through the cobblestone streets
that almost got tipped over.
Okay.
Yeah, you don't know how terrifying it is
to have a meth face tap your windshield, okay?
Yeah, so Malia comes in, she's like,
ha, and Max is like, this is all because of you.
You strung them along the whole damn bird.
You're like a bird bird a bird who strings things
Can't you just say that comes a bread that will leave on the floor bird or strong with your bird?
It's like you're a bird making a nest with nothing but old strings
And I made a big nest of string and you got into the nest of your layin egg and guess what eggs in the strings bird
You've just blown into a window bird and she's like well, I'm sorry. I'm cute, okay?
Like I'm so sorry. I'm hot everybody. Do I need to call a sorry? I'm hot meeting
Then Adam comes in and he's like, oh, yeah, you should be sorry because that's that I met a really special person
And I didn't she's like, um, okay, he you do, do you know how much spinach I wasted on you?
How much spinach?
Enjoy, yeah, spinach, I'm in the morning, Malia.
Here's a good yourself.
In this spinach situation, yes you did.
Congratulations, let us gain it.
You wanna cookie here, have this.
Oh, sorry, it's invisible.
Yeah, so Malia and Bugsy, she's like,
I can't believe he's such an asshole in the galley.
Like, I don't know where everyone's mad because I'm hot.
I told them I just wanna be friends.
And she's like, oh, look, Malia, but she's a bit of a taste.
Yeah, it's bad when even bugs is coming down on you
Oh my soul must have sped is the arpad like oh no here we go I was like well look it's pretty clear now that I want nothing to do with Adam
And Adam you know Adam he's instead of apologizing
He's just like what's wrong bro because he goes back to West. He's like dude you over react
I was I was over reacting because of Malia wasn't because of you. It was Malia's. He's like, dude, you overreacting. I was overreacting because of Malia.
It wasn't because of you.
It was Malia's fault.
Come on, dude.
Come on.
You can give me a wedgie.
You can give me a wedgie.
Oh, guess what?
I'm going command.
You can put your hand in my diary ass.
Yeah, totally gross.
He just pulls down his pants and shoves his butt in West's face.
He's like, do it.
Do it.
And he's like, it's childish.
It's childish. So then Adam
was into the galley and he's like don't worry. You'll nail it eventually. And then he falls
going up the steps. You fucking idiot. I know it's like so many layers of awfulness happening
here. Massage and my favorite. Massage and misogyny.ogyny, just ass holeness, immaturity, lack of personal
responsibility, bad jokes, just gross.
Yeah.
Um, so then, it's a then Bobbie's in and Bobbie's like, whoah, you kiss both of them and that's
what happens.
And Lee's like, if I want to fuck everyone on the boat, that's my prerogative, okay?
And so that's what Max, and she's right, by the way.
Yeah, she's right.
I agree with that.
It's just the whole lying thing.
Yeah, the teasing is not what you do.
And the possibly using one while you're trying to
fuck the other way, but you want to, you know.
So that's when Max comes in speaking gibberish.
She's like, not, do not on a set of bar fights.
Stop because dickhead birds mess around with gizas
The bird gizas birds of birds and dickhead's bars
So Hannah and Adam are outside and they're doing that reality thing where it's like oh, we hate the same person
Let's bond. Yeah, okay. It's like a world war now
So they're outside and he's like what what's wrong with where's a wedgie?
And he loses his mind.
Is it because there's foe hawks missing?
And now we think he's a man.
She's like, it's not about the wedgie.
Like, oh, there's Dr. Capses here.
Yeah, that's the, that's the, that's Hannah's moment from like her Prince of Tide's trailer.
It's not about the wedgie, but it's not about the wedgie, but he was mad. It's
not about the wedgie. And then Adam just starts crying.
I just said, this is Adam's logic. I love. Sometimes I just love Adam because he's so
stupid because I just said she's playing you like a book like she played me like a book
I'm like you played a book. Yeah
She's like she's treating me like an audible
Like you just press flames. Suddenly. I'm gonna grapes to her after you're asked. You know what I mean
You know, it's like when I was a teenager in my high school production of this is what books sound like and I was dressed as a book and I came out on stage it was like blah blah blah blah blah and
that's how I played a book so she was playing me like that book.
Like that Nintendo game book.
So the Hannah is like okay I am going to use this opportunity to get an ally so she's
like well I feel bad because I gave you such a hard time but at the food you were sending out and all along it was Malia who was distracting you and I was like Edim
Just to stop serving crispy tacos with horse meat inside
Serves something more elegant and I should have realized it was Malia who was distracting you from cooking something good
Yeah, it was her fault. I was looking at her cookie so much
It's all I could think about Package cookies. She's like, yeah, I knew it was her fault. I was looking at her cookie so much. It's all I could think about
Package cookies. She's like yeah, I knew it was her fault that dirty little hole and
That's why I served Dougie those onions because I would see her and be like wow look how young she is so young so young on young
Onion onions got a sirvonians It's myia's fault. I just wanted everyone to cry. That Malia was making me cry.
So I cut up onions and I put them in everything.
It's like on New It.
I just looked at Malia's like that girl's got layers.
So many layers to peel away, but in the end,
there was nothing inside.
Like an onion.
I had to express myself with onions.
That's why I tried mixing Thai food with Mexican food. I was just thinking of a trip to Mexico with Malia and a Thai brothel
It's like okay, you guys are stretching it a little much here. Okay, I mean
I have to sit. Oh, sorry. Go ahead. I was gonna say this is actively making me hungry, which is
Pretty convenient because you know one of our sponsors does happen to be hello fresh
Oh, yeah yeah, baby.
Hello fresh, hello fresh.
You guys, I know, I totally interrupted whatever joke
you were gonna make.
Because I, no, not really.
No, no, no.
You know, Hello Fresh, here's a good thing.
If Adam had been cooking with Hello Fresh,
no amount of Malia could have distracted him
from making a delicious meal in 30 minutes
or less.
Exactly.
And he wouldn't be making like crappy pre-mixed cookies.
And he wouldn't be making the same thing over and over again all the time because with
Hello fresh, you get actual boxes with fresh food and three different recipes in every
single box.
Everything's color-coded so you
know what goes with what. Things are proportion for you. Basically it teaches you how to cook
because it gives you the best ingredients and the freshest ingredients and tells you what the hell
to do with them. If I were chief stew I would let everyone know that hello fresh sauce is the
freshest ingredients measured to the exact quantities needed, so
there's no food waste.
And when I was mad at you, about the pre-pickage cookies.
It's because I was mad that you, unlike Hello Fresh, did not employ a full-time registered
dietician on staff who reviews the recipe to ensure it's nutritionally balanced and the it would make me cry. So instead now I'm just offering people that's your Nick promo code with HelloFresh. Got a HelloFresh.com and use the promo code
Crapin's30. Whoa that's like $10 a meal. Yeah. Go to Crapin's.com and enter
the promo code Crapin's 30 for 30 dollars off your first week and hello
fresh. I hate to admit it but hello fresh is a better chef than I'll ever be and if you don't believe me later skater
That's right because it's $30 off your first week and hello fresh
Once again, we're gonna repeat it over and over and over again until you get your own wedgie
That's right. Hello fresh dot com. Premo code code crap and 30 I've never finished a meal with hello fresh that I haven't said god I love
that banana and the best part by hello fresh you could eat it on the bow and I
won't get annoyed thank you hello fresh hello fresh go eat that shit hello
crap and 30s the promo promo code. Use that one.
Don't use another one.
You may hear the add somewhere else in life.
Use crap and 30.
Yes.
Crap and 30s of promo code.
One really good rule that I love about this show is we advertise things we actually use.
We try them all.
We love them all.
And we actually use Hello Fresh and love it.
It's given us many a good meal.
We do.
I was just looking at this is not even the add anymore. I was actually just looking at my little Hello Fresh recipe
booklet that I got in one of my boxes.
I was like, oh, I kind of make these again.
Mm-hmm.
So, I went, I went, and then got like a little tiny bit
of spit in my throat.
I was like, that sounds delicious.
I'm salivating while we talk.
So Adam is like, if he just saw the texts,
she sent me a little octopus emoji.
What do you think that means?
She's like, I can't wait for this to blow up.
You've actually got texts.
So they're using texts against me,
and she's actually been sending texts.
I'll be in a room game.
So then it's the next morning, and we get this silly moment with Lauren but some reason
her eagerness cracks me up.
She's like, Hannah, should I stand right here just do laundry?
Well, my hair's like crazy today.
Oh my god.
Okay, my hair's crazy.
I'm doing the ironing.
Oh my god.
Let's just do the ironing.
Oh my god.
I can do it.
I can do it.
I got a bad bad bad bad bad.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god, I can do it. I can do it. I'm gonna be a bai bai bai bai. Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. and we're gonna meet at some dicks, do something and the meantime, I'm gonna go back to bed. And Bog is like, oh, she's back to her old way.
Oh, also I have to say Adam is sitting in the kitchen slurping up cereal with a catering
spoon.
I can't imagine that.
I just walked past him like gross.
Kevlae, if I was ever trying to fuck someone who eats with a spoon, that giant.
So Malia is now, um, she's, she's now in her interview, getting choked up because Max
he's making all these shitty comments to her and she's, she's just, you know, it's
starting to get, get to her. And I was like, well, welcome to the wonderful world of sexual
harassment. Yes. You know, and also the wonderful world of just leading everybody on and then that's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a good one. That's a all wrong. That's right. So Bugsine Adam when they were in the kitchen,
and yeah, before Hannah goes to bed,
oh, you know what?
Never mind, you already did that.
I did it.
So Malia's frying, and she's like, I'm over it.
I don't deserve names.
He called me a bird.
OK.
What kind of bird?
Be more specific.
Purchase dumb.
He's like, yeah, you didn't deserve that slut.
I wouldn't call you a bird.
I just call you a whore.
Skater!
It lit a skater.
Oh, and by the way, you're a pigeon, the dirtiest bird of them all.
Remember, I remember when I first subscribed to your website, and it was TheBump.com.
Unfortunately, that URL is no longer found.
You're a 404 skater yeah get on my face or you'll
that's what so the captain's like wow we're all looking happy today huh there was like
so lots of do a preference sheet meeting now huh let's do a preference sheet meeting. Can I get a Hannah, Adam, and Wes?
Okay, we got Dr. Kwang Henderson, all right?
We're gonna be excited for him.
They want a black tie, Texas team dinner party, all right?
Can you do that, Adam?
You're too distracted by Melia.
Got a lot of ballgams coming on this, okay?
Lots of ballgams, now they're from Texas, Adam.
He's like, yeah, they can take this, okay? Lots of ballgowns. Now they're from Texas, Adam. He's like,
yeah, they can take this spice. And she's like, now, come on, don't put horns on your forehead, Adam.
Hey, Adam, could you make some sushi in the shape of a bowl low? Thank you.
This guest would like a empanada shaped like a banana that floats. Can you do that? Can
I count on you to do that? Can you shape some pad tie like the Dallas star, the
lone star, huh? Can you do that? So then we get a nice little scene of Max and
Mollia cleaning and he's like I'm sick of watching that bat. So man, and that's just a little dick. And just stop there.
Like you are the biggest gossipy mini in the whole show, okay?
And your highlights aren't helping Max.
Yeah, calm it.
He is the biggest nanny.
Nanny, if he was a bit, he'd be a nanny bid.
Did you read the text fight that they were all having
over the course of the week?
Oh, we should mention, I didn't really read that.
We should mention that.
The in between, one thing we did not cover was they all got under a 24 hour Twitter fight.
And it was hilarious.
Just going after each other, but it was so this cast.
I mean, it was exactly how they are on TV.
Yeah.
Lauren, like, let everyone, like, how dare you, Lauren, that's not nice.
And it makes the entire boat look bad.
It's called my opinion. and it's on TV,
so you're already look bad.
It's like, that is unfair, and I completely
stand behind my good friend, Malia.
It doesn't deserve to be in Chicago.
Shut the fuck up.
So then they all start going after each other.
Max is like, you cool, okay?
You have a cool, bad.
Or whatever on the Twitter.
I think that was already interrupt. The way it started was that Bobby was like, whoa, wow, I already have 50,000 followers on Twitter.
And Laura was like, yeah, and you only bought 48,000 of them.
And he's a shudder!
But you think it's my opinion.
And like from there, it just exploded into everything and it got into it got into Hannah and like well
at least we didn't like bone the guy on the iPad whatever and then it just went for hours
and hours.
But the best part about it was how I ended with Wes he goes.
Well I'd like to say I don't like fighting and I stand my opinion, but I'm sorry for being too harsh, everybody.
Thank you so much for reading these lovely tweets.
I'm like, okay.
He even ends up quittering in like a cute little apology.
And then Momila Hopa didn't upset, Momila and Daddy.
And then Malia just peaked.
Malia also posted something on her Instagram,
which I didn't bother her because I'm like, I can't be bothered with this
But she posted a whole thing that was like to all the haters. I just want you know
I don't care what you saying because you're haters and I leave my life
And I like the tugboat and I'm on a yacht and you're a heater and I don't listen to haters and haters haters haters by like haters
Like that's called by haters
She's like octopus emoji.
This cast is kind of out of control.
I don't think there's ever been a cast of any below deck that has created so much Twitter
noise.
And like hilarious Twitter noise, like Twitter fights, because this isn't the first time
it's happened this season.
There was the whole Hannah Bobby thing at the beginning of the season when the one
water happens live.
I mean, this is kind of like, we're getting into Vanderpump rules territory with this below deck med.
I know. They're almost hurting the other cast. I know.
Like when the other cast comes on, they're like, well, we're going to clean.
It's like, uh-oh. Yeah, but to start faking each other and fighting real quick.
Yeah. I mean, because the thing is below deck, one thing that I think is very clever about
the show in general is that every season, they bring back one or two people, but they always bring
back fresh blood.
So you don't have a situation where it's the same cast and it gets stagnant and then people
grow and start acting in a certain way.
But I can't imagine how they're going to do the next blow deck med without all of these
people.
Yeah. Well, they... Oh god, I don't know. I're going to do the next blow deck med without all of these people. Yeah.
Well, they, yeah.
Oh, god, I don't know.
I guess we'll wait to see.
It's fine.
Anyway.
So the next scene, they're doing the anchor
and Bili is heading a hole.
And I was like, well, that pretty much
something's up the episode.
Done.
Yeah, because basically, well, there's also something
where Hannah is like, telling asking bugs to clean the crew
mess.
And even Lauren is like, wow Hannah really does not work does she?
And she's like, even I'm saying this.
But yeah, so Malia, like Sandy is like, alright, we're gonna do some anchoring, alright,
Malia, okay let me see how many yards are we down?
Malia, how many yards?
I need to see some fingers.
Hello, talk to me, I'm getting really annoyed with the bow.
Malia? I know it's like she's watching Mama Mia and the bow segment won't end.
It's like 20 minutes later. She's like, I'm getting annoyed with the bow.
Okay.
I think I see some gum drops. Oh, are those your fingers? I can't quite tell.
It's a little bit of movement over there. It's a little short. Okay.
You know what? Wes and Malia, you're not working on the bow together anymore,
not anymore. Look, you know, if you're going to have your fingers inside, Wes the whole
time instead of holding them up, she's like, I was holding them up. She's like, if she can't
do it, I want someone who can't goddamn it. And he's like, I don't understand what she
wasn't doing to be honest. And she's like, I need Ingers if she's not tall enough, you need to fuck someone taller, okay?
You know what you got to do you got to put a little box little apple crate there and she can stand on that or here's better idea
Have Bobby nap take a nice big nap on the bow and then she can stand on Bobby that way I can see her
Nice and clearly how about that?
She needs to step it up literally now that was a film.
That was great man if I could dance like that.
I will over came out the ice to show her fingers.
That was a whole bunch of well-rested people huh?
So the guests start arriving and this time they are arriving on a water taxi
and everyone's like that's amazing. They're so rich are arriving on a water taxi and uh everyone's like that's
amazing they're so rich they enter on a water taxi. And so they get on and the lead guy
his name is Quang are also Q and he's and Max said welcome to the y'all and Quang Q's
like whoa whoa you can't talk to me.
You know why?
Because ladies love your accents.
Ah, bro.
See what I did there.
He's like a YOLO, bro.
So their dress like super fancy and bugs is like,
the fun sets like a ball.
If I finish getting all the ashes,
the Sinder can maybe go have had a legs to me.
And then Adam's like, I don't know what the fuck If I finish getting all the ashes, the sin dark and baby guy of Hannah Lexrey.
And the Adam's like, I don't know what the fuck these people think they're doing, but it's like watching the board game clue.
They're all Mrs. Peacock.
And then the primer is wife. It's like, hi, I'm Stacey Henderson. Thanks for having me on the yacht. Thanks.
She's like, I'm sure. Thanks.
Charm, candlestick in the conservatory.
You can't, you know what I'm saying?
Miner like Tension Wolf, soft strung and disposable.
Flames on the side of my cheeks.
Yeah.
So there's a big meathead guy, like a big roaredrey G looking guy as there seems to be on every charter like 90% of the charters this year.
Yeah.
And he's like, if the rooms are knocking, don't bother on knocking.
We should also, we should also talk about the guy with like the bad goe and some crazy shirt. It was like a plaid shirt with weird gray like
patchy things on it. And then a pattern, I'm looking at it. I took a screenshot. It's
like a pattern. It's like someone's head repeated over and over and over. It's really like,
what are the gaze and Texas doing? What are the gaze and Texas doing? That's what I'd
like to know. Well, we're not getting marriage benefits.
I'll tell you that.
So I think that these people are just fake fancy
because they're dressed like crazy people.
And then they're trying to seem fancy
by asking for weird things.
Yes.
Like one goes, can I get an ice coffee
with some frosted up coconut cream milk and maybe some
honey. Maybe put some peanut butter in there and also this girl's peed pajamas
need to be steamed. Do you have any nuts?
You're just making sit-up. Do you have an umbrella but one that doesn't have a
handle? It's sort of just like just an umbrella top but no bottom. We'd like that too
Please I really like brushing giraffes. Could you get me a giraffe in the brush?
No, bitch. No, we can't
Do you happen to have the Mona Lisa nearby? We'd really like to just look for it
And then we want to do this thing. Can you serve the sushi on the Mona Lisa turn it into like a table?
I love the Mona Lisa so much.
I want her to have my last name.
Could you get the paperwork moving on that?
Could you resurrect Beverly Sills and have her do a zombie performance of La Traviata?
That'd be great.
Did you take us to the spot Jesus was resurrected from?
Like no bitch, no we can't, okay?
We'd like to look at a Brontosaurus.
Can you bring one on board?
So Hannah's like Bulby Malia. Can you pick the master for me?
I'm gonna try and figure out how to work honey peanut butter mint coconut cream and
Panda bears into a decent drink
At the end product is pressing on seignee
And bucks is like And the end product is prism on seignee. And but she's like, she's lazy. So Bobby and Malia are unpacking upstairs.
And Bobby, Malia's like, I don't even know what to do.
Like, how do you even unpack?
What's unpacking?
And Bobby's like, well, those are some shitty things.
You're called nville Coverage Bobby.
ULUGH!
And now the guess, Adam's whole playhead is to serve just like some sushi.
And by the way, some really uninteresting sushi.
Like salmon roll, spicy tuna and cucumber roll.
I mean, even the Ralph, the Ralph supermarket has better sushi than that.
I know, you're in the middle of the ocean and you're still ordering from the Costco freezer section.
I know, at least give us a rainbow roll.
Give us a filly roll, anything.
So, but he's preparing, there's just gonna be
past sushi, order of scant and apes, et cetera.
And they're guessing, can we have a proper sit down lunch please?
I'm like, oh, goodness.
So, if I see it's like, Hanna, Hanna, I don't want to do a sit down lunch please and like oh goodness so nice he's like Hanna Hanna they want
to do a sit down and has like all right she's like oh she's a difficult and it goes
bad and she's like they want to sit down to in a cunt and he's like whoa you can't serve
a canna pace with silver she's like, Adam. You remember how we're not fighting. He's like, yeah, Melissa bitch. I'm on it
I'll take some extra spinach while you're eating if you know what I'm saying. I look a spinach cookie
So then they so they they somehow manage to serve lunch at a table and
Hannah comes around with some peanut,
she's like, I've got some peanut grigio
and she's like, oh, that's my favorite.
So she's like, right, let me point you some.
So she pours a little taste there and she's like,
I'm gonna need a little bit more than that, please.
And she's like, that's for you to taste it,
you stupid bitch.
They all start laughing.
And other ladies like that, just,
sorry, I just say that. I was like, yes, because you people are extras. And I don like that. Just sorry. So I just say that.
I was like, yes, because you people are extras.
And I don't even know how you got on this hook.
Like they're obviously poor.
The lady's like, I'm freezing.
May I have a fair blanket?
It must be made of fair.
And so she's wearing this fur blanket.
And she goes, can I ask you a question?
Are you a helicopter?
No.
Are you an airplane? No. Are you a horse, Redonky? No, ma'am.
Well, too bad because we need to travel to Spain right now. Is there a travel agent on board? And the
head was like, a nail because we all stews and not travel agents. Great. I'll take a flight to Spain. Thank you. Ma'am, I'm his Hannah Walking dot com.
So, Hannah.
It's like a lazy Susan of shit just being like spun around with these people.
Oh, Hannah, Hannah, will you tell the president we'll be right there?
But could you just make sure we can get in the White House?
Thanks so much.
Um, can you please tell President Obama that we'd like him to join us for dinner tonight?
Sorry he's not President Nemo.
How did you make him President again?
No, right.
We have an urgent message. Will you tell the Academy we regret that we will not be able to accept our
awards for best actors and actors and supporting actors, supporting actors? We're so sorry, regrets.
Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up
on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court.
I'm Matt Bellas-Ive.
And I'm Sydney Battle,
and we're the hosts of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell.
Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity view,
from the buildup, why it happened, and the repercussions.
What does our obsession with these feuds say about us?
We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and
Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows.
It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud.
But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon.
Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood.
How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully
crafted narrative designed to sell albums?
Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts.
You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wonder Yeah.
Oh, so Hannah is like, lowering. you can listen ad free on the Amazon music or wonder yeah.
Oh, so Hannah is like, Lauren, could you pop to the bridge police and unpack style, but forward cabin on booking flights and then ask bugs what she needs.
And Lauren's like, um, lock the girl.
That's more talking than working, okay?
Like how long does it take to book a flight?
Two hours, it takes two hours to book a flight.
I'm like, you just finished ironing like one pair of underwear
that you've been working on since the beginning of the charter.
Okay.
So Hannah is working on the computer, which probably is like one
kilobite per second download rate.
And then she finally has some flight and she's like, all right,
Miss Ladyface, he is the news. I can get you to Spain but it's gonna be in direct. You take
13 hours, you get to fly to Zurich and from Zurich to Tanzania, from Tanzania, over to
Lisbon and from Lisbon back to Tanzania, from Tanzania up to Madrid. Is that okay with
you? She's like, um, can we just find something that's direct? Like, is that possible? I'm like, you're
in the middle of the sea. You're in the middle of the sea. Could you just call that sweet dragon
from how to train your dragon and have him come get me? Thanks. Oh my God, my fur feels so
good. Can you ask Wonder Woman to come and just like, roam me over to Spain? She's really
good at that. Also, could you make her less Moroccan looking? Because I'm more a fan of the Linda Carter version.
Thank.
Where is Spain anyway? Can someone answer me that?
Oh, so let me see. Lawrence like blah blah blah blah blah.
I'll take care of the galley.
Why don't or I'll take care of the young pecking?
Because right now we need someone in the galley.
Lauren go and she's like you know and I really should know better like come on now it's not like
it's not like she's in bed like all the other scenes you guys have done. She's actually doing something.
She's dealing with nightmare people it's okay. So meanwhile Sandy is like oh guess what? I see a beach.
So me while Sandy is like, oh, guess what? I see a beach.
I see a beach.
Hey, my Leah, take a look.
Do you see a beach?
Do you see a beach?
Yeah, look, it's a beach.
I'm like, yeah, see a beach.
And Bob is like, oh, I'm invisible.
She doesn't see a beach.
Oh.
Yeah, he's standing behind him going.
And they're still looking out the window.
He's like, no one sees Bobby.
No.
Like, are they supposed to suddenly give you a raise because you're whistling behind them?
Like, what the hell do you expect?
Truly nothing makes sense in this episode.
It's just like, it really doesn't.
Why don't you go up and say, hey, Captain Sandy, I would really like some more responsibility.
And I think I'm capable of more than I'm being offered in this job.
I would love to move up.
And she'd be like, you know, what?
I respect that.
Show me your fingers.
Sound.
You're hired.
Well, I think that they're probably building in an arc that like in the final episode,
Bobby finally gets some huge responsibility and he feels like he finally progressed.
But meanwhile downstairs, Max is in the crew, Max.
And he's like, you know what they say about pod at Baroque girls?
They're like, I'm starting cracking up. She's like, you know what they say about pineapple rotgers?
They're like,
and it starts cracking up.
She's like, it works.
And then we're like,
why do they say about pineapple?
What do they say about pineapple?
Didn't make sure come taste sweet.
Oh, I did not know that.
Yeah, well me and Hannah do.
Lauren's like, what are they saying about it?
I was like, I was like, I'm like, Lauren, I get you, I's like, what are they saying about it?
I was like, I was like, I'm like, Lauren,
I get you, I don't know what they say about pineapple,
cause I don't like this.
They say the same thing about pineapple
that they do about you, Lauren.
You give guys kanker sauce.
You know what they say about pineapple?
It ruins gelatin.
I know, Max, I was, I'm always concerned
about the state of gelatin.
So thank you for reminding us that your Aspic mold could be threatened by this pineapple.
No, the best thing about pineapples is that they're better holy.
Get a gas.
You're welcome.
That cuts to the core.
Get it.
So meanwhile, Adam is going on an emotional journey.
Pineapples really a sweet girl on the inside.
You know what they say about pineapples?
They shouldn't be teasing everyone.
Let them on.
They don't know what they say about pineapples, the birds.
So Adam's like, yeah, I just realized,
my feelings towards West were just my misdirected feelings towards Malia. Oh my god. Congratulations, Dr. Freud
Yeah, it's just because Malia's a slut. No, we had a heart to heart and
We realized Malia's a horse
We're coming out with a line of greeting cards. So Max is like um, so we go to West. Yeah, I was up to West
He's like hey bro. shake on it, right?
It's now that was a paddock egg, right, bro?
You know what they say?
Later skater, but guess what?
Skater, it's now time.
I'm sorry, that was stupid.
Whether it's like, whether he's not saying sorry, are you, are you tech to you?
Or sorry for your underwear, which
were quite fashionable by the way, but we have to be professional.
So I said, okay, little does Adam realize that right before I shook his hand, I rub
my hand on a wet surface.
Who's laughing now?
So the guests are like, um, why isn't the captain stopping?
Oh, what an idiot.
What's his stopping?
Quark's like, yeah, just stopped.
Yeah, yeah.
My surname is Quark.
OK.
You don't get to have an opinion.
Yeah, this, this idiot, this roared-raged guy.
You know, he's a real asshole.
He's the one, he's the one where you make a whole plan for the night.
And then like, he shows up in an after five minutes like
Yo guys, I got a really great idea. How about instead we go down to the movie theater and you're like no
I made a whole plan that was to go to the restaurant and say no no no the movie's gonna be great
Let's do it. You guys want to do movie theater. I was like yeah, let's go to the movie theater like you fuck you for ruining my plan
Yeah, I ruined the whole thing so like it's like
for ruining my plan. Yeah, ruins the whole thing. So like, she's like, get me, get me, man, you see.
She's like, let me guess, they want to do some matter sports.
Like, yes, well, we got it. We're on it.
She's like, the emergency.
I love to go back to the islands.
Like, no, they want to go see the islands or they want to go to the restaurant islands, because I can't tell with this group. I'm not sure. Hey, anchor anchor coming anchor. This is Sandy anchor. We're not gonna count on Malia's magic fingers today. Okay. You're just gonna listen to again. Right. Well, you get down there.
Feed the anchor, Melia.
Take one for the team.
I'm gonna be up here enjoying a brand Zeno while you're down there enjoying an anchor Zeno.
Get it?
Zeno.
That's when you're well rested. You make good jokes.
And the lady in the fur blanket.
It's like, I can't get my hair wet.
I'm not that pretty.
I'm like, it's a wig. And be you're not rich. Stop fronting. You couldn't afford the banana.
Okay. You couldn't afford the banana. I love that banana. God, I love that banana. So then,
so while they're playing on the water sports, Wes's water toys I
should say, Wes goes up to Malia's like, yes, what? Adam tried to pull a joys and I
shook his hand, but guess what? My fingers were crossed on the other hand.
Huh. Guess what Adam just said that Malia is dead to him. Now let's just hope he's
not a necromance.
Hey, Walker, would that be, huh? She's like, I'm sorry that dead people find me hot, okay?
Hey, can we print something that,
well right in the sky that says,
I'm sorry for being hot love Malia, okay?
That would be great.
He's like, all right then.
Glad I had a tattooed and almost got a kiss.
Yeah.
And Wes is like, you know, one thing I'm sorry
on to realize,
the thing that Adam did with the onions,
that was spiteful.
And the thing he did to me,
that was spiteful.
And what he did to Malia,
that was spiteful.
I'm starting to realize,
Adam's a little spiteful.
I was like, oh, wow.
Grand observations from the booson.
I'm starting to realize,
I'm hungry for a sprite.
It's weird, right?
It's not even the same thing. It's added in art.
You know it's weird, but going up and down and up and down and there's water everywhere. And it doesn't look like we're on land.
I'm starting to realize we're on a boat.
Is it too early for me to apologize publicly for calling out him a sprite?
He's a little bit of a sprite. He's a little bit of a sprite. Stupid. Okay, so Lauren and Bugsie, way
as to say, oh no, this is dinner time and Adam, Adam's like, I know a thing or two about
Tex-Mex, but these are not Tex-Mex people. So I'm going to do something crazy. TATX! Yeah,
it's like that sounds like an awful mix. Please don't. Please don't. I actually was like,
that sounds delicious. So it's like I've just heard something about pineapple and it's going to be
in every dish for now. I'm a sweet sweet spam. So he makes something and so this is supposed to be
the black tie event. And of of course the steroid guy shows up
And he's wearing a bowload the black tie affair. I'm like come on. You got to try you have to try and the guy who had the weird shirt
With the faces on it. He's there in some sequin tuxedo jacket. I'm like, I don't at these people. They're all young
The ladies are in ballgowns and cowboy hats
So learn and bugsy learn it's like it's like, I don't need to
like talk out of fish skull, but like I got frustrated because like we did the majority
of the work. Like, remember how we set up the table and then Hannah got credit for setting
up the table. Like, oh my God, there's not an Oscar for best table setting up. Okay. I was like, oh, you just noticed seeing,
did you not notice me lighting the chatefas?
If I were first to, I wouldn't have known
that a long time ago.
So there's coconut curry and Adam's like,
yeah, you like my coconut curry.
It's a fancy dinner as you'll see by my stupid bass hat. Yeah, he's still wearing his hat in his apron still wearing it
But now he can go away with it because he made nice with Hannah
Bob. Yeah, Hammond's like you look lovely tonight eating
Max and Bubby Bobby are having like a really
Eliminating conversation
Max is like birds right and Bobby's like hey you ever notice when you sit on the toilet how your balls move
And Max is like sorry, I don't look at that because I'm always looking at the beds
When I'm on the toilet. Oh shit, and he's like yeah, I've noticed it ever since I was a kid
I I've noticed it ever since I was a kid. Max is like, I'm always looking at the bird eggs.
I always see those two little bird eggs wobbling around.
He's like, oh, bro, those aren't bird eggs.
Those are your balls.
Woo!
So on the kitchen, Hannah's like,
Adam, that cake is amazing.
What a wonderful job you did.
If I was techie I'd use the boots
The boots texting to text you about it and then let everybody read after. Do you remember
when you did that to me everybody? That is the cake of someone who does not have a girl
on the brain. And Bokzie is so mad. She's like, What's happening? They just say each other announced
about to stand by with a dust to each other.
I will not accept that.
I'm just gonna stand here and you know what I'm gonna say?
Absolutely nothing. Just go stand here and say hello.
So over. You looking for the bridge?
Take it to the bridge now.
So at the end of dinner everyone's like oh
Going to bed
Like not fakely at all and then it turns into an episode of Frazier as everyone goes from room to room to room slamming doors
It's like noises off
Where's Carol Burnett? Yeah. So, by the way, that girl on Big Brother, that bimbo,
who keeps pulling her ear every time she goes into the diary room.
Oh, God.
She needs to be.
Stop trying to be Carol Burnett.
Thank you.
You're a fucking idiot bimbo.
Yeah, that's a fuck down.
That is trash.
That is such a good point, because every time she does,
it's like, you think you pioneered the ear pull,
you are not Carol fucking Bernette.
You're Elena with terrible boob job and a hunchback, okay?
And I'm, I'm, I'm shame you for the hunchback,
because A, I have one, and B,
because you're getting the hunchback from your bad fake boobs.
Yeah, I have bet middler posture,
but I am not relying on my terrible face to get me places, okay?
That's the difference. You trash.
Trash.
Sorry. Wrong show.
Like I got dark.
That really made me so mad. Like, even just thinking of an ear pull. I was like, how dare she.
Oh, dare.
No, it annoys me every single time.
Like, hi, Julie. And she pulls. It's like, no, shut up, Elena. Yeah.
Oh, she's like, yep, just the hero of comedy, Julie.
So let's see. So Max is like speaking of Cal Banette.
I think they're all fucking her in that room.
They're all jumping on Cal Banette.
She's the pilot off the birds, the birds.
A whole bunch of birds going at it over there.
So it's the next morning and it's like anchor time, anchor time,
sand.
It's like the note on the table that says,
the guest of Swingy O's and Hannah like can read his odd talking.
And she's like, that's awesome.
Oh, great.
Sorry, I don't know why I thought that was so funny.
But he's like, everybody can you believe it?
And she's like, right on swing along, swingy swing.
So then there's anchor stuff.
And then he's like, all right, Bobby,
I want you to go stand over there.
Great.
You're nice and tall.
Wonderful.
Great work, anchor anchor.
I want Bobby on the anchor, OK?
Hey, Bobby, you're the anchor man.
Now tell me to who's getting.
God, I love that banana. Emily is like
That's so funny
She said and it cracks me up a Bobby could be an anchor for be an end banana news network
So she's like, you know, I would rather add Babby on that anchor.
I'm really just like, well, she wants you.
Now that I'm almost done, I was like, yeah, that's how Adam felt.
So now it's raining, the guests are packing, they're leaving.
Well, the guests are not actually not packing.
The guests are having them pack.
And then they leave.
And they're like, it was a great time.
My name's Q. Q out everyone.
Here's your tip.
So, God.
She's like, that's what's on my bucket list, this trip.
And I got double A in all, so thanks.
Thanks.
This is a hand-pissed okay.
I've to roll the work I've done in the past 24 hours.
I'd better get paid.
And Bugsie's like, in bed.
It's a joke. Am I muddy? It's like in bed it's the chair
anybody
it's like bugs it doesn't work when there's no fortune cookie involved
I can make one fortune cookie
alright guys tip meeting
in place
there's no one
no one's done
alright
well there's one more charter
in bed
well when we came in today, guys, I gave it to
Wes and Malia. You're not even in this meeting. Please leave. Please
leave. I can see. Anyway, let's turn around this boat. So the
departure, Malia and Bobby are, I don't know,
they're on the bow and pulling up the whatever.
And Malia is like, all right, Bob,
is that one's fine?
And he's like, oh, trust me,
this way is better.
Yeah.
That's where you're at in a minute.
Yeah.
So this way is better.
My mom just told me mom.
And she's like, um, he's blatantly
going to bring me and he feels that, okay, that's okay because he quote unquote, and
knows better excuse me. Bobby, we need to talk about this situation because
you're being competitive with me. Yeah. And then he's, so then, then he's
mad. He's like, I just have more experience. I'm lying. I'm experienced. That's
all. And then you have zero experience. And she's like, yeah, but you keep saying,
that's how you do this. This is how you do it. And if it means this much, we can march right
into the captain's office and ask her who she'd let ride the banana first. You know what,
and he's like, hmm. Yeah, she's saying, I was a lot of her initiative. They just get
him to a whole big fight. And finally she want to become a leader. You do teamwork.
You don't be a dick. And he's like, you know what?
Okay, I'm going somewhere else.
And then he follows her away.
But she's right.
She's walking after her.
She's right, because Bobby has to fix his attitude
because he is one to sulk and to have a tantrum.
And she's basically like, hey, the reason why
I got this position, I don't even care about this position.
It's because I don't have tantrumes all the time.
It's because I'm cute, just kidding.
It's not because I'm cute, God.
But I have to be on Bobby's side here,
which literally hurts.
But he was teaching her how to tie things
like just last week with a bunch of course.
Like he does kind of know how to tie it off
a little bit better.
I get to your boss, but some things you know better
and some things you're recruit will know better.
And you know, sometimes you got to lift people up and really showcase what they're good at
and not just trying to be bass.
Well, also, Bobby is the one who like could not do simple arithmetic when like dropping
the anchor into the ocean, you know, back in the beginning of the season. So we all have
their weaknesses.
I actually blame all this on Wes and I'll tell you why,
because as the person who was in some sort of authority,
he should not have been making out with someone
who works under him, because now he's
created a situation where even if Malia is totally competent
and should be in that position, and she may or may not
deserve that, I don't know.
But now people don't, her authority has been undermined by a situation
that he kind of put her in. So yeah, and after we were talking about this last week, I thought
after the show, I was like, wait a minute, Wes is always saying, I've never done this before,
it's crazy. It's the first time I've ever done it. So first time you've ever had a woman working
under you. And you've said so. So don't pat yourself on the back. A hundred
percent of the time you've had a woman working under you, you tried fucking your, so that
makes your record look a lot shadier, buddy. Yeah. If this were actually in office and not
a yacht, they're like for sure, Wes and Max, maybe Bobby would be fired by now because
what they've done is really, it really is actual
sexual harassment.
You know, those are like things that they could, you know, you could get sued and like a
company would have to settle for a few million dollars or at least a few hundred, maybe,
or maybe like 70,000.
I don't know, you know, obviously what do I know about corporate life, but that's what I
imagine.
Well, I've seen this picture.
I've seen this picture.
I've seen this picture.
Harassment. Let's go over to Adam. Yeah. So they're all out drinking and Adam is talking to Hannah who of course, Hannah is like,
you want to fuck right now?
Let's do it right now into the show.
We'll make everybody mad.
I'm like, Jesus, man.
Keep your hands off the left over.
It's like, that's the girl to eat your sandwich right out of the fridge in the office.
You know, like, so shit.
You can't go from, you cannot go from, so shit. He's like, I'm sorry, you can't
go from you cannot go from Jason Ziegler to Adam. Just please, yeah, please have some
self respect. Yeah. So she's, he's like, I'm sick of being on a boat with her. When
you think you find someone cool and then I've said it since the first day, don't hurt
me. I've had my heart broken. I'm losing steam. Is this how well chicks are?
I'm like, you know what? The ones that you're going for just because they're like young and hot and you know nothing about them
Yes, pretty much like when you're gonna use people just for sexuality and nothing else
You'd barely even know the girl's name, dude. Shut the fuck up. You use or anything, okay? And how about this? How about this?
How about you take some responsibility in the situation?
Okay, maybe she was interested in Wes
because he wasn't a creep, okay?
And wasn't spiteful, okay?
So like, stop acting like you're just some innocent victim,
like, oh, my heart was broken by a femme fatale.
No, it's like you were a creep.
You creeped her out, you were strange,
you were sarcastic, you know, she was like, were a creep. You creeped her out. You were strange. You were sarcastic.
You know, she was like, you know what?
This is a bad decision.
Okay, why don't you stop being a bad decision?
Yeah, and Hannah, no matter what,
he's saying basically his heart is broken
and he wants to die.
And Hannah's like, oh, he's so funny.
Tell me more.
Tell me more big boy.
And at the end of the other end of the table,
but he's like, hey, look at that,
the friend's nah.
And Malia is like, yeah, he said he was disgusted with her like literally disgust that.
So cool.
Well, look at that.
Maybe if she ever gets at the bed or tell her.
So Hannah's like, all right, you want to make Malia jealous.
You want to make a jealous.
I'm going to bring my nose right close to you. It's been like a two close, but. You want to make a jealous. I'm gonna bring my nose right close to you It's been like a two-close but I'm gonna get make a jealous and sure enough like Melia is getting fully jealous
And randomly West is over at a bar. We're talking to some some strange lady and buying her a drink. I don't even know what's going on
There. I don't know why West you know West has been working hard to get Melia
And yes, it is sexual harassment, but as long as you've put in the work
I mean,
why aren't you hanging out with Malia?
Well, but fuck her. Like, he sees her staring at Adam. So he's a quora. I'll flirt with
these other ladies at the bar. Yeah. And so now she's mad and she's pissed off at both
of them and cannot hide it at all, which was amazing. And Hannah's like, Malia's gagging
for attention right now. I'd love to be gagging.
She shouldn't have joked him around.
I'd love to joked someone around.
He's like, I get it. Let's just go back to the boat.
Fuck. Okay. So go right. I mean,
let me let me grab Lawrence to go dish first.
Oh my god. You just told me to go dish.
That's so hilarious. Yeah.
I'll go take it. I don't have it. Have fun.
Oh my god. It's crazy. to go to a dish. That's so hilarious. Yeah, no, I'll go take it. I'll have it. No, no, have fun. Oh my god, it's crazy.
Can you tell me about pineapple yet?
So Hannah's like drunk and she's like,
I'm really glad I met you, Adam.
You're so so full.
You're so, you were so hurt by Malia.
I'm so glad.
You're so trick-tipped.
I love your Pokemon face.
Beautiful.
I love the way that you can see even though your pupils are turned a little bit
No, how do you do that? It's amazing. He's like yeah
She's like you've got a six inch cock. What was that six inch cock someone said that and I was like wait
I'm in it stop was can we stop pretending that that's a big?
Yeah, I was like
I was like six inches
I don't even remember them saying anything about six
inch talk, but I do know that like six inches just full on average. Yeah. So Adam's like, bye,
everybody, bye, Max, bye, Melilla, Hannah's wasted. So we're gonna, and he's like, oh, you're gonna
hook up that bird. He's like, yeah, we're gonna go poke it at right now as a matter of fact.
And Melilla's like, if you fuck her right now,
she's like, oh yeah, well I've heard a lot about you,
Malia, I've heard that you're a special girl.
Actually not, litus skater.
Yeah.
You pulled a knot and a later skater.
Literally.
He literally said, you're a pretty special girl.
Not special at all really.
You're pretty disgusting.
Litus skater.
Rose. And she's like, I cannot believe both of these guys are ignoring me right now.
Haha.
That's so funny.
It's a really good season, I have to say.
So that was the end of Below Deck, made it to Ranyan for lots of of scandal and why don't we do a little
bit of a pivot sort of like Hannah on Adam why don't we pivot over to one of our
favorite segments the list of sportloids
this is when we turn the podcast over to the listeners if you support the show at
the listener spotlight level on Patreon,
then we let you have two minutes to tell us about yourself or why you like Bravo, yada,
yada, yada. So this week we have Rebecca Shack, who we heard from a few months ago. So let's
hear what Rebecca Shack has to say about things. Ready?
Uh-huh.
Hi guys, your number one fan from Minneapolis here, Rebecca Shack.
First, to clear up a burning question, the Mary-Towell Moore statue.
She is mid-throw in releasing the hat.
So while the broomstick, great idea, Ronnie.
No broomstick. It's just about to leave her hand.
Anyway, my favorite bravo show has
got to be the OG Real Housewives of Orange County. Although I do love me some top chef and
some flipping out, those recaps aren't nearly as great and so it's got to be OC for me. I've been thrilled that the new season started and
your bonus episode breakdown of the trailer killed me. I've got to say, as a
lifelong overweight gal, Chubby Shannon just makes me so happy and I know that's cruel, but it's true. And I cannot wait to see
chubbishan and dressed up as Brett Michaels. That is going to make my year. I
started watching OC probably season two and right around the time that New
Jersey and New York probably started and I watched all of them and I loved them.
And I've been kind of hooked ever since.
Watch what crap ends obviously,
enhances the experience.
And I don't think I'll ever stop watching,
at least as long as you guys are doing the podcast forever.
Anyway, I just love housewives because it's so ridiculous and such a
real relief from my daily life and so I'm happy to watch it and I'm happy to
listen to your recaps. Anyway, that's enough for me. Talk to you guys later.
Wish I could make it to a live show, but I've been traveling too much and
spending too much money.
So come to the Midwest and I'll get there. All right. Love you guys. Bye.
Oh, thanks for Becca. Yeah. So good. Thank you so much for that.
And I really love people's pride about that Mary Tyler Moore statue. We've gotten so many pictures of it
and so many corrections being like, excuse you. This is what it is and do not get it twisted bitch.
Yeah.
And I love it.
I love having home pride because you know, I got it too, girl.
Yes.
RIP Marietyler, more RIP.
Yeah.
So you guys, that brings us to the end of our episode.
We have to thank you once again for listening always of course speaking of live shows and watchroprepens.com. Follow the links.
Don't want to be a tired record but for a old record, an entire old bliss. But you
guys have a great rest of the day and we will be back tomorrow with more real
housewives of New York City in Mexico. Can't wait for that.
Bye everyone.
Yes, bye everybody.
Hey everyone, thanks for listening to the podcast today.
We really appreciate the love and support you guys show us.
If you have a minute, go to iTunes and leave a review.
And if you don't want to do that, maybe next time you're talking to your friends about
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Also check us out on Instagram and at Twitter.
On Instagram, we're at Watch Where Crappens.
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Really, thank you guys so much.
We really mean it.
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And even if you do none of those things, we're just happy you're listening.
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