Watch What Crappens - RHOBH: Beverly Beach Sesh

Episode Date: April 18, 2018

The long, uneventful season of RHOBH comes to a whimpering close as Dorit finally hosts a fashion show for Beverly Beach. Not to be outdone, Kyle then hosts a viewing party of "American Woman..." at her soon-to-be-burgled house. Fun times? Somehow we still manage to have a good time recapping this silliness. Come listen! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few, follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors! Christie Wowardy-Dowardy! Kelly Barlow, when she goes Barlow, we go high-low.
Starting point is 00:00:37 Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the bird! Jess Sayon, okay! Shannon out of a cannon Anthony! And our super premium Patreon subscribers, Kelly Grant, the Grant Master! Give them hell, Miss Noel! And Lizzie Drucker, a fun motherfucker! Watch what crap bins, watch what crap bins Who cares what happens when there's so much that happens?
Starting point is 00:01:05 What happens? What happens? I have cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cr Hey everyone, welcome to Watch For Crappins! The podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to watch, I'm Ben Mandelker from Vsadlog.com and the Banderblender podcast. And joining me as usual is the wonderful, the the charming the sweet the cut kind and cutly Ronnie Caram from Trash Talk TV dot com and the roast pricks bachelor podcast hello there Ronnie. Hello Hello, hello. Did you get your complimentary bag of Beverly Beach items? I Got the Ronnie suits.
Starting point is 00:02:08 Ronnie suit. It's just a big, um, it's just a big old Navy, Bermuda shorts, pockets in the front. Yeah. I got a, uh, I got a burlap sack full of just scraps of, of, and tatters of fabric. Beverly Beach. So we are here today to talk about real housewives of Beverly Hills, the big season finale. And before we do, I don't know, we can show our usual stuff.
Starting point is 00:02:40 We're trying to collect information about whether or not people would be interested in going to, in us doing a second Atlanta show and a second Philly show since they're both on the verge of selling out. So if you are interested, just give us some feedback in some sort of way. You can tweet us, you can do whatever. We have a poll up at Watcher Crap and Live and Lovenant, which is our Facebook group. That poll may have closed by now. I don't know how to set the duration for those things But we want to know because if enough people are interested we'll do second shows in both those cities so
Starting point is 00:03:12 One oughter one ought so that's that's what's on my mind right now these days I think that's what's pressing me and of course we have many shows in many cities We have two sold out shows in Chicago coming up. And then in June, we have a show in Phoenix. And then two days later, we have a show in San Francisco on gay pride weekend. I mean, does anything go better with gay pride than watch a crap ends?
Starting point is 00:03:38 I don't think so. So get your tickets to that because, you know, we don't want to hear, we don't want to hear that you didn't, weren't able to get we don't want to hear that you didn't weren't able to get your ticket because it sold out okay we want you to get your ticket now and lock it in like a good gay pride person would yes like Beverly beats lock it in like a poem like a thong like a like a thing going through two butt cheeks lock in your ticket. Um yes so this is a season finale of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
Starting point is 00:04:09 And I think the burning question on everybody's mind is who's going to be late and how am I going to be about it for four reunions? I'll be very mad for five reunions. How about that? I love you, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, but get the lead out, darling! I mean, I love a petty argument, you know? But they didn't even do that this time. They're like refusing to even fight peddily. Peddily?
Starting point is 00:04:37 You're not even fighting peddily! Yeah, well, either way, as I've said before, I kind of feel like Beverly Hills peaked in the New York episodes and it's kind of been a slow crawl to the finish line Like the season I thought was going along just nicely going very well. It seemed to be it seemed like it was building on itself You know the stupid thing with Teddy and Doreet You know the stupid thing with Teddy and Doreet Built somehow and got to this point where all of a sudden it was now this three-way fight between Lisa Kyle and Doree I just felt like it was building on itself and then it kind of just Went away. Yeah But you know here we are. I'm gonna maximize blah blah the fuck it
Starting point is 00:05:25 I'm gonna maximize, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. People were saying, some people were theorizing that this could be Erica Jain's last season because when Andy Cohen had a bajillion people on stage for his Watch What Happens live show in LA last week, Erica Jain tried to separate herself from the pack. Oh, actually, I'm sorry, I wasn't the bajillion episode, it was the Beverly Hills episode. And she tried to separate herself from the pack
Starting point is 00:05:44 when they were waving goodbye to the audience. I don't know, I think that seems like a episode, it was the Beverly Hills episode. And she tried to separate herself from the pack when they were waving goodbye to the audience. I don't know. I think that seems like a little, it seems like a stretch, but it's worth, worth thinking about at least. Yeah, I think her ass is going to stay on this show until they make her leave and they're not going to fire her. Yeah, because they'll be like, you want to be back.
Starting point is 00:05:58 I'll say yes, because I'll say yes now. I'll say yes to everything. Well, I'm not just saying yes to requests. You're like forcing shit down people, sir. It's not like you said yes to a music career on YouTube, okay? YouTube accepted your videos. Mikey accepts your money, okay?
Starting point is 00:06:16 You hired somebody to write a book for you. It's not like you're accepting all of these things. You're forcing them, darling. Now to that, I say, for some sister, that's how we build forced empires. You know, would we even have? Would we have forced gum if it weren't for forced empires? We certainly wouldn't. Would we have smoking the mother fucking bear? No, we wouldn't. Motherfoss, but with you, Luke, I am your glon squad. Luke, I'm your mother fucking daddy got back what the fuck
Starting point is 00:06:52 Suprancess layers my sister I look at the fuck Job of the fuck Carrie who gives the fuck off? Obi-Wan, Kaffee fuck, Obi What the fuck? Obi-Wan, c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c'est c She's, she's Kutur. She's, she's Empire. Empire. I'm not gonna strike you, but if you strike me, I'm gonna strike you back, motherfucker. Okay, so where do we open with this show?
Starting point is 00:07:34 I will tell you. It's a street, right? It's a street. She's like getting out of a car and at the Beverly Beach fashion show and someone's like, are you ready? She's like, I don't know. I think so. I don't know. I think so. I think so. I don't know. I think so. I think so. I think so. I don't know. I think so.
Starting point is 00:07:52 She's like, I'm so nervous. Yeah. I thought I thought another. to get the bone chisin and find a way to get the bone chit. Like it's called the dolly Doree. Jesus Christ calm down. Okay. So I'm gonna get some paper towels for the floor. Please Doree just learned about dollies. When she made that noise, I swear to God I thought another bicycle was coming in from Berlin to get in her way. Erica Jane's style. Erica Jane's just standing there staring at the tree's passer. Oh, ladies!
Starting point is 00:08:27 RAAAAAAA! Like a ball! Just because why not? Yeah, just because why? I mean, it literally was a squeal for palm tree, so, you know, it fits. Yeah, she sees like a motorie's ball, she's like, I'm like, And she's like, I have invited press! Instagram people?
Starting point is 00:08:51 Who have PK? He's like influencers, influencers babe, influencers. We've invited influencers. He's like... We have Dog Fancy Magazine coming. We have... From Pits Quarterly.
Starting point is 00:09:07 Get off of my corner! I own both of those magazine rights. Van the pub dog fancy and Van the pub carpet corner! He's like, we have everyone coming. Everyone from... From Kipplingger's personal finance We have everyone coming. Everyone from from KiplingJer's personal finance to the Harvard Business Review
Starting point is 00:09:34 to the Harvard Night School newsletter. It's just all their creditors. 321 Contact Magazine highlights. It's the guy from the Hertz rental wanting their shit car back. It's the guy from the Hertz rental wanting their shit car Mac I can't tell your rental is over people your rental is so so she sees these trees and she's squeals and she's like You did exactly what I'm missing. I was like yeah palm trees in a platform That's like stop acting like they can go over there, okay? So then we cut to close up of Ken yawning the car. Exactly. He's watching the men also He's like who came up with the idea of putting televisions and cars
Starting point is 00:10:14 It's born right I've ever been on darling. I'm just gonna get down Yes, he's just yawning in the car Win this like you're supposed to be excited darling don't fall asleep he's like yes I'm intrigued like what there's young models as soon as you show you say away and then we see uh Teddy and Edwin Ted when getting ready she's like my boobs about to fall off uh listen had it. I wish I knew what to do with my boobs, but I'm daddy. I'm poor. I don't know Listen if only one boob falls out. I'll take it Just being me guys just being me accountable to my breasts
Starting point is 00:10:57 Now we're back at the rehearsals for For Beverly Beach and we see we see Doree practicing her big lunch is like ladies and gentlemen here is Bouverley Beach we know no no Bobberley Beach Bobberley Beach Bobberley Here we come ladies and gentlemen but don't you don't bitch wait it isn't a line ladies and gentlemen here it is. Beverly Spatune, no, no. Beverly Peach, Beverly, Baluga, Baluga.
Starting point is 00:11:32 Baluga, Baluga, Baluga, Yogut Lamp. Here we go, Bosch. It's like that's an Amazon show. All right, here we are. Beverly Lampshade, no are. Beverly lampshade. No, no, not lampshade. Yolanda Fasta. No.
Starting point is 00:11:51 Did it a wink and crumpets? Oh, I didn't know what's happening to me. Staples and pencaps, no, that's my desk. Can I tell you something disgusting and wonderful? My hands smell like tuna fish, because I just ate tuna fish. Okay, back to the tracks. So she's like, when PK has me to give up my company to be a mother,
Starting point is 00:12:14 I was synonymous with business woman. I said, sure, I'll go on hiatus. Like Willis and Gracius. Coral's answer. Willis and Gracius Coral's answer I Love your dreary impersonation just becomes more and more hilarious every single just just So stupid incident my head that's really how she talks like when I hear her actually talk on the show
Starting point is 00:12:41 I'm like oh my god bent us her perfectly, but in my head I'm like that's really I may I may have to just face out my person. Your impersonation is just too funny. I just know it's on them. Yours is perfect. It's on the nose. It sounds exactly like her. I can't even try. So guys, guys, I just feel like it's my big night. And then you do your impersonation on my big night. I know it's just like, I've all the nights. I have to do you have impersonation. My voice. you have to do a my night Well, I'll tell you what happens when you're on here You have two munchkins and bikinis
Starting point is 00:13:13 Jack I get over here and sick that rumpy company Jagger's part of the press call if I get a bad review that means I'll have a bad review Like great, you really figured out how the press works. So now it's just so Rina now we see Rina and Eric and Lomo I'm like um, so Rina's like I'm so proud of Dree and her fashion line. I mean, and there are no dusters like UVC What's cool? That she owns it baby Hustler She owns it baby. She'll hustler. Hi, Erica. How are you? How was New York? How is everything? Look at this. It's great. Everything's great.
Starting point is 00:13:53 Because like, I don't feel the, but I'm nervous for the range. Like me too. I can relate. It's one show away. You could be a huge success. Huge failure. It's one show away. You could be a huge success or a huge failure. Oh, yeah. Raina is just like, it's the end of the season. I'm just gonna be thrilled about fucking everything up. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:14 She's like, I'm just gonna just say words until we, someone says, that's a wrap on the season 45. So, so now it's like red carpet. There's Camille, like, whoa, camera, whoa. And, uh. Did. There's Camille, like, wow, camera, um, uh, and uh, Did you notice it Camille had no one to kiss, but she still stood there with her lips wide open, like she was ready because she's like, Eh, eh, eh, eh, and then Chetty goes, Look, Beverly Beach by Dary.
Starting point is 00:14:41 Looks like, well, thanks for coming, Teddy. The power of observation is a very intense thing. Are those palm trees on board? Well, it's like a beach, but like we're in Beverly Hills. Whoa, Beverly Beach. So at least they've had a friend who's like, hello. You know what she does that? What she does that one she enters the room. She goes, hello, hello, hello.
Starting point is 00:15:01 Like, hey, hello. I want my best cuffs. So can you be able to say? Hmm. Oh, did I spray pee with my, we're engaging my ring. Hmm. David's a good guy. He makes me laugh.
Starting point is 00:15:20 Life is pretty darn good. I'm like, those are your only rules. Frames are made everybody laugh. Look what happened there He got down on one more and said will you be my And I said and ever since then we've been like I'm going to call you van der Pum Camille like van der Pum takes credit for everything She's like come finally took my advice and went for it. I know. I was like, you do this Lisa. I did it. The name is now Camille Vanderbump. David, David, wish he was.
Starting point is 00:15:57 Surprise boy, George didn't emerge and say, I'm going to sing comma Camille Yon get it. I did that. I've got the fuck out of that So Kyle comes in and sees the range. She goes oh my god. I'm going to cry. Oh my god But she doesn't actually cry. She just makes it sound like she had to cry Yeah, so she's just like I love that they showed that clip of Kelsey and Camille Yeah, it's like they don't show Camille or get for a diamond, but they do just showed that clip of Kelsey and Camille. It's like they don't show Camille or get for a diamond, but they do just play that clip of Kelsey jumping her in a little over and over. Camille eating low moments from Camille's life.
Starting point is 00:16:33 So I'm flying again. So I'm orientating. I'm so excited for you. You got to do house. Yeah. You know, you've got security. It's a new house. You know, we got
Starting point is 00:16:51 System the kick-out system, you know, there's like that it'll be from the windows and you know But they open the beeps Yeah, I'm just assuming Camille was standing behind them. Yeah, you know, it's funny They showed this little scene in Mauricio talking to Edwin about I guess Edwin was gonna set up a security system and I'm like I thought it was just like a nothing seen little do we realize it was foreshadowing for something very Not not so great at the end of the episode, but we'll get to that. I know I was I was worried talking about is kick ass security system like awkward. I hope you got your money back Yes, seriously, So, Erica's thick, great. So, they're all standing around and Kyle,
Starting point is 00:17:30 it's a good time, so why not bring up Panigate again? So, Kyle brings it up to Erica, and she's like, it's just sort of like that thing at your dinner party. It's just like, why would she do that? Why is she always trying to cause, why is Dereet always trying to cause problems between you and me like you you mean Erica
Starting point is 00:17:45 You know and are like a lot of good luck. I'm an avicado Well, it's a bit of a trouble water with a most famous house I read when I was a beetle It was a cover of a band was to be in called Simon and I don't give a fuck think cool be in called Simon and I don't get a fuck thing called. I don't get a fuck thing called. I don't get a fuck thing called. Where are you feeling? I can be.
Starting point is 00:18:09 Meal's cold with three cold. It gives a fuck. It's all about it. I was like, come on, we have to do something. We're on Kyle Richards. Say it one, bye. So PK is like, hello. Welcome to Bevel of Beach.
Starting point is 00:18:23 My name is PK and this is my wife Doreet. We got trees. Also to capital one, the checks in the mail. Alright, let's do this. I'd like to give a special shout out to the editor and chief of Model Railroad and magazine. Hello, welcome. Get over here crumpet corner your mind tropical fish hobbyists about to welcome you you're you're you're editing I love the real I have a list of magazines open by right right now because I love it you
Starting point is 00:18:57 wikid some magazines you I just need crumpet corner in my life that's not real yes it is it is. If you say it enough times, it comes into existence. Like, Erica's book. Or Erica's music video. Well, her album did get a great review in crampett corner. Yes, my song. Crampett, crampett, crampett.
Starting point is 00:19:19 Crampett, I'm a pussy. Yeah, my pussy's made a crampus, and I don't give a strumper. Fuck it, crampet, fuck it. Hey, before we lift this curtain up, we're hoping we get a very good right up in Knuckleburn's magazine. I'm looking at you. Instagram crumpets social. Instagram crumpets. Crumpets are us. We've got some huge influences here like cookies. Those are very influencing.
Starting point is 00:19:42 Well, I'd like to point out the cookies in the back. Crumpet Digests. It's a good magazine if you just want little snippets of crumpet, crumpet updates. Carls like, wow, they sure love a curtain. Which is funny because that's what I was going to say. I love the crowd dance, Nora. I love that carls week for America. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:02 So then there's a commercial. Wait, wait, for the commercial. I just have to say, they dropped the curtain and it's like a runway with seats. I was like, is this supposed to be the surprise? They came to a fashion show. It's like going to a restaurant and then having a curtain drop be like, and look, tables and chairs. Who would have thought? I wrote, thank God they had a commercial break to get us through the shock. Oh, did that happen after the commercial break? Sorry. I think so, because then she's like, this is what I look so
Starting point is 00:20:30 awful. It's my dreams, my love. My impression. I'm like, you didn't even draw your own bikinis, okay? We saw you riding in pain, or someone else was drawing the dream, but whatever. So, and then we get a good Rinne quote. This is like, Rinne, what did you think? Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? Whoa.
Starting point is 00:20:53 Whoa, it's runaway. That's a crazy, person lila belt. Look at those. I don't know yet. It's runaway. Those bikini, if they're walking, they're walking. Just like walking, are you kidding me? Yeah, no, they're not kidding you.
Starting point is 00:21:09 Okay. Yeah, when the fashion shoot fashion show begins, Erica's like, yeah, all right. Pretty cool. Cool. Now, here with the take, but I think the custom fit. Hey, that one looks like I got the eye of Crumpet Quarterly. Oh. Oh, you're quote-unlead-out. I don't think I can't see. It just comes to you, James, and name.
Starting point is 00:21:31 As the editor and chief of both Beverly Hills Lifetime magazine and Crumpet Lifestyle, I have to say, this is infringement! And I'm writing it down in my Minilla envelope. Where's my business face? So Teddy's like, I'm proud of Doreet. That's it. I'm Teddy. And Rin is like, look great.
Starting point is 00:22:01 I would totally buy one, but I want a free one first Why brought the cow when you get the milk bikini for free Are you kidding me? So Doreet's like I'm surprised myself Doreet the designer. She's back Like oh my god, you're a regular share. She's gonna be opening up a boutique soon called Doreet by Doreet by Doreet by Tammy Flew. Doreet by Ciesbach. Flew. You Flew! I'm just thinking of my husband, Pekes, and proud me to do what last met me to do. So I go, okay, that's enough of this so Eric was like I'm so proud of you. You're murdering it
Starting point is 00:22:48 It's only a compliment. I've seen Eric's mind Murdered for game means congratulations, but Katie's a dead and then victory and then PK brought up a birthday cake Happy birthday to you. Clap clap. We love you, Tommy. What's wrong with you? We forget about that one, but that was a good one too. That's the best part. What's wrong with you?
Starting point is 00:23:21 What's wrong with you? Hello. So, Panda Primes, like good job darling. Good job. Even the crumpled was happy. Very nice. And there he said, girls, I'd like to thank you for being a friend. Trevor down the road and back again. The golden girls are back on him, Mrs. that's an in-outsubate being. To come back.
Starting point is 00:23:45 You take the good. You take the bad. You take them She says that's an announcement, baby. She's going back! She's going back! You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both, and they have a reboot! Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Brandon from like I'm proud of Dereet. See what you want about her. She's loud. She's squealy. She has 19 different accents. Her boobs are square She terrifies the swans. Whatever. Sure, she talks too much, but she's a nice girl. And she won't be in my magazine Go and so shady ask Carla's like whoa cheers Congratulations. So when does that Beverly Hills lifestyle magazine come out with you guys as if she doesn't already know that Go and so shady ask Kyle is like whoa cheers congratulations So when does that Beverly Hills lifestyle magazine come out with you guys as if she doesn't already know that to be Has been cut like total fuckery it was great. It's like Kyle senses that the shape of her pool won't be enough of a storyline to make it really entire season I love that movie the shape of my pool.
Starting point is 00:24:45 So it's where Kyle falls in love with a pool toy. And then it has sex with it, and she fills up her bathroom full of water and has sex with her pool toy. She would. She would. She'd like play mitt for something, fucking Kyle. Trouble making Kyle. And by the way, Glenn, don't think we're not looking at you vis-a-vis the update on Kyle's life. By the way, Glenn. Yeah, by the way, Trey of Ham.
Starting point is 00:25:12 That's what Glenn brought to this. A Trey of Ham. Well, thanks a lot, Glenn. But we'll get there, guys. I think you're right. We'll get a friend, right? What are they going to talk about that Trey of Ham? It's coming! So, yeah, so Kyle's cause like so, Daryl. When is that, when is, or Lisa, when is that issue of Beverly Hills lifestyle magazine
Starting point is 00:25:33 with Daryl on the cover and all those photos? When is that issue gonna come out? Cause I can't wait for everyone in Beverly Hills to read it and see Daryl's face throughout all of that magazine, specifically her her face lots and lots of her face Well, I was talking about to read it happens so Where is he said to read face? I'm like This is like well
Starting point is 00:25:59 We decided what would be best would be to give those photos to the Harvard Crumpet review and world's take pictures of Of scones instead Congratulations your face will be served dryly next to a cup of tea Which everyone loves and quam crept quartet lead Doreet you're going to get crumpet quartet is first ever thought out cover shot by any lubewits not Libewits lubewits If that a sale? I'll take it. No, Eric, I'll be quiet.
Starting point is 00:26:30 So Vanderpromp's like, well, you were happy with the photo shoot. So, you know, little Truman not poachy didn't want any negativity. Mother was very upset. It's not true. And not, Cody. And he's like, girl, I do not want any negativity about this magazine.
Starting point is 00:26:47 My mother is going to be very upset. I'm very heterosexual. Yeah. I think you have Beverly Leslie from Will and Grace, because the only grace has been back on and it is so hilarious. He's like, hello, Karen. Yeah. So to reach like, well, it's a bit shitty that Lisa cut me out of the magazine and didn't even tell me
Starting point is 00:27:06 I mean, why would she cut me out after I've complained Incidentally for weeks upon weeks, but I never once in my face that magazine with that photo shoot. Why? The problem wouldn't even have turned me if girl hadn't brought it up And you never would have known cuz you the fuck it's that magazine. Yeah, exactly. It's like a car washes So Rina's like meanwhile if Beverly Hills lifestyle wants to interview us we're a game Rina She's she's like Was to read not happy with the photos. Oh, it was least not happy to read
Starting point is 00:27:34 I'm like or maybe is both Three pop Lisa was not happy to read for not being happy the photos right now the way a fan of pump flip is so funny She's like, we're using the shoot, just not the pictures. It's just to retant. I like to read his hands, just not crazy about her headbitches. And so we're just like, yes, she goes, they're like,
Starting point is 00:28:00 well, like you should, like, had it, because you don't tell the reader whatever it was. And she's like, well, it was only decided just yesterday. And they flashed back to a month ago. I don't want her negativity in Beverly Hills, like, the magazine. And I saw a profile of Obama. Obama cookies.
Starting point is 00:28:14 You ever had those cookies before? Obama grumpets. I'm cold. I've had Obama grumpets. They're delicious. I read about them in Obama grumpetet quarterly not to be confused with Obama quarterly Which as we know is the in-house newsletter for Obama cookies. It's all very confusing and for the Orange County version Trumpets and tea
Starting point is 00:28:41 Trumpets, but you know how like it's hermins on the of America, but in orange county it's called trumpets. Delicious. So not to be confused with but delicious but totally different. So this is all awkward and I guess to read supposed to fight but she's like the protein pony is I have some respect. So. If you think you're in our friendship. Well, as a problem it sure means a lot to me.
Starting point is 00:29:19 No, because what spurs that on is Kyle and her typical Kyle way goes, well Lisa why have you never asked me to be in Beverly Hills magazine which is like because you live in in Sino now traitor I'll ask you when I decide to you decide to launch garbage bad kids magazine and do a profile on your home. Don't worry. We'll have Glen as a centerfold in Hamtree magazine. It's just coming up in the... Any moment, Skull.
Starting point is 00:29:54 We'll at work profile you and we start up and we launch our magazine. Bad luck, Juju House. magazine. Mmm. So, yes. So, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
Starting point is 00:30:17 oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Kyle has something to say. Oh, don't. Let me hold it. My Bella magazine.
Starting point is 00:30:27 So this becomes both my Beverly Beach night and my Bella night all mixed up in one. Now, how would you like to ruin it for me, Kyle? Don't be ridiculous about it either. So Kyle's like, well, I mean, it's just that, like, I'm like really upset because you basically said that I was the one that caused Erica to be so mad about panic I remember when you said that dinner and like you just can't say those things and not have there be any repercussions Like you just said things that just didn't make sense to me and now I was like oh about the other way Yeah, yeah, and to read space you like well. I was strong a comparison I was drunk a person that the way that you would everyone's lives by manipulating them and making them hate me.
Starting point is 00:31:05 That's all. Yeah. And Darius said, what did you say it's all right when it's not all right? I was like karma. Maybe it's karma because that's what you've all been doing this all season. And it's so boring. So she's like, I wasn't insinuating how to make a comparison. Does it tell him that she started everything? Remember?
Starting point is 00:31:28 And Carl's like, that made no sense. He said Carl said it first. You just dumped you that to a friend. I didn't say you wouldn't participate in the part and part of it. Cookie is cookies! I'm good and good and what you meant is good and so cookies. And Rin is like, this is at least the bandit from small. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:43 I'm looking for making you sense. Yeah, because basically, Kyle is like, I'm sick of you making it sound like, you're making it sound like I'm coming for Erica all the time. Well, I'm sorry, I didn't, you know, I'm only saying that because you denied have a profile in Crumpets magazine, that's all. And I thought that's so strange. She must really hate Erica. Like remember the time she made fun of Erica when she went to the court, You had that Marriott I was like I didn't do it. Why whatever so Kyle's saying like listen You're always insinuating this shit and you never admit it and now Erica's like I'm getting drawn into something that I put to bed
Starting point is 00:32:17 A year ago Yeah, Boba Rat! Hehehehe Oh god these people At least Savannah Bumps just trying to separate herself out of it She's like, wow these underwrapping is just ridiculous Ridiculous and so You know now everyone's just starting to get mad about it And Kyle finally Kyle
Starting point is 00:32:38 Because the pantygate stuff is coming up And Kyle basically turns Erica to be like Can you just like clarify that She says this in so many you just like clarify that she says this in so many words. Can you clarify that I, I was not the reason why you were so upset at Panicade. It wasn't my fault. I didn't like, Doree didn't leave the room and then I said something to you to make you feel a certain way. It wasn't me. And Erica's just like, Hmm Can we talk about the kid Kardashian game now there's what some put now there's right in where my underwear Okay, yeah, I didn't wear my underwear there and I got paid to do what do you bet you complain to the mountain?
Starting point is 00:33:13 I was like I'm leaving Yeah, and and Doree will also Doree goes Clearly you have a little bit of guilt there because I mean, I don't know why you keep on being so sensitive about all this pantygate stuff. I'm like, Dree, you were the one who, like, you resurrected it a few weeks ago, and you're the one who keeps harping on it, and pitting it on Kyle.
Starting point is 00:33:36 I just can't with pantygate. Like, every time you say pantygate, my eyes just glaze over. Yeah, I have to just like get over it. So kind of like- I'm leaving, what? I'm so, like get over it so I'm leaving I'm so Oh I'm the kiss when I'm mad that's a list of Beverly Hills for me like you just you're at a show called Beverly Beach
Starting point is 00:33:53 Yeah, exactly exactly Exactly Hello, this is Lisa Vanderpum. We are taking a commercial break now But if you don't, you won't worry. You're very lucky." Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest
Starting point is 00:34:24 and insightful take on parenting, hosted by myself Megan that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident not-so-expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking. Oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego
Starting point is 00:34:49 in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or Wondery app. So, and then again, Erica's doing this thing like well i've already i've already defended kyle like i've told a time and i'm again the i know you didn't get me mad i'm like that's not the point erica the point is
Starting point is 00:35:14 she's looking to be exonerated and you're just sitting there like i don't have a she doesn't he does no one gives a fact yeah so she goes out more like what happened I was just talking about my amazing security system. That's about the thing. That's going to talk, just talking about that emergency system. It's going to be a really good one.
Starting point is 00:35:32 Cameras in one room, the basement, and then a motion detector in a bush, about 30 feet from the house. It should be great. And Kyle's like, well, everyone's full of shit. You know, Dorita, Erica's up Dorita's. Dorita's a fan of pumps ass. And everyone's up, everyone's all asses. They can't be honest.
Starting point is 00:35:54 And it's in my expense. I think Kyle's really mad that Erica is in the Kardashian game. When Kyle is legit friends with the Kardashians, she's not in the game. I think that Kyle is mad that no one's up her ass. And I actually think that there is some truth to what Rinna was saying. Rinna says that it taps into some family shit.
Starting point is 00:36:11 I don't know the way that Rinna explained it. I don't think that that made total sense because she said something about like she needs consistency with her friends or whatever. I think what makes sense though is that I think Kyle has always been put in this position where she is like the loyal one doing what she thinks is like the right thing.
Starting point is 00:36:27 She's like, she's, she's, you know, supporting her sister. She's supporting Lee Savannah pump, but she never feels appreciated for the shit that she does. And so moments happen where this bubbles up where she just feels chronically underappreciated and then she just has a tantrum and leaves. And the thing is the reason why I say that is I get it because I'm like, I feel like I'm very college rich. Even though I don't think I'm supportive of it. Anyone, I'm, I just feel, I don't feel like I support anyone. It's not like, but I do feel like
Starting point is 00:36:54 I want to have a tantrum all the time and wine. I think Kyle is really just, you know, trying to keep their show moving. And she's like, we are not having this is the saddest season finale we've ever had. It's a bikini unveiling. No one's fighting about anything. And the only person who's really making any headway in this cast is Erica Jane. So I'm going to try and start a fight with Erica Jane. And Erica Jane's like, wow, you're a fuck, you're a certified with me. You better buy it out of the contest you know, but I'm still a bitch
Starting point is 00:37:28 She's just pissed and she doesn't know what to do, but I have to say you know, at least she's trying You know, you could try by like maybe having a scene that's not about your house your money or fucking every other thing You're trying to say you know, there's better ways to try, but at least she's trying something. Yeah, exactly well I just I like when Kyle is less whimpering and more uh screaming. I like when she screams at people. So to read after Kyle storms out to read it's like well unfortunately the spirit of the evening gets ruined because the at the end of the evening. I mean are you fucking kidding me? It's just one night. I wouldn't do that to someone on a night that's important to them. I'm like, you're the one who asked if there's any unresolved issues. You brought
Starting point is 00:38:08 this on. Yeah. What's it like to talk about Panthigate? And then they show as evidence of to read, be contradicting herself, screaming at Teddy at her glam party. Although to be fair, I don't think the glam party was a major milestone event in Teddy's life And if it was I'll take it I'll take it so let's see. She's like once again, Ka rune me not So callin' or a hold on hold on to read and then to read says to Lisa I'm I hope this is an out of work, but to reach says to Lisa Lisa Good friends don't do that Lisa
Starting point is 00:38:45 I'm like you were such a snake because now like she's turning it against like Kyle's not a good friend Not a good friend. I know well Lisa's trying to like do both She's like well, I guess Dorita's upset about the panty of the something talking to the central park what and Kyle Is upset about something that Dorita did hugging too much. I'm on the right track here. But I'm the real victim here, because I had horrible things said about me. And Nani Kaye, for those who at least remember Nani Kaye is. So then Erica's trying to call Kyle. And Kyle typically, as she always does,
Starting point is 00:39:21 to ignore the phone call, you know. Mm-hmm. Uh, and then she's like, uh, she's gonna get in trouble this for this later, but she's like, you know, a fuck you and you're kissing ass Erica. And like doesn't answer the phone they get that odd mic, which is fine.
Starting point is 00:39:36 Mm-hmm. Look, Kyle, Kyle, you can try and go up a bunch of people. I wouldn't go up against Erica. She literally doesn't give a fuck and she has an insult. She'll rip your head off, okay? And she's more popular than you right now. So how about bring Kim back if you want to fight with somebody. At least
Starting point is 00:39:49 that's entertaining. I would love a Kyle and Erica fight though. That would actually be pretty amazing. Assuming that we have season one Kyle or season four Kyle versus Carlton Kyle. And by the way, I would actually be okay with Carlton coming back. I feel like Carlton is someone that now, several years later, I feel like I appreciate Carlton more and her brand of crazy and I would be open for Carlton coming back. I don't think they need to bring back other things that don't work. It's like when you go get your tire fixed and they're like they sell you any tire and they're like would you like to keep this one as a spare?
Starting point is 00:40:23 And you're like sure. And then it's like why would I keep the spare tire when I've got a better tire on, you know? It's like stop keeping Carlton and the trunk everybody. There's like plenty of crazy people in real house, or in Beverly Hills to put on TV. We don't need the app to keep bringing up the same old. The assumption is that Carlton is broken. And I think that we all thought she was broken but what we didn't realize
Starting point is 00:40:45 is that she was before our time. I'm just gonna put that out there. I think Carlton deserves a re-examination at the very least. Let's throw her in as a friend up. Let's have her have some appearances and just see how that goes. How about that? Okay, sir. Or Eden's as soon. Just to be supportive. just see how that goes. How about that? Okay, sir. We're eating this as soon. Just to be supportive. So next up is Rina and Harry Hamlin. She's like, let's call the Lila.
Starting point is 00:41:15 I've got a cell phone, face time. And Delilah goes, I cleaned. Wanna see out? Wanna see out? Is it me or has the Delilah storyline not moved forward the entire season? It's just been like stories. It's just been like FaceTime and Delilah in an apartment and it's like she's in New York
Starting point is 00:41:31 but now she's back and now she's in New York, now she's back, now she's in New York. They're doing no arc to that Delilah thing. No, Delilah goes back and forth from her futon to Rinna's house and Harry comes back and forth to Canada and says things like, I'm shooting Shooter next week. And you're a vote girl's and vote girl's cleaned their apartment. Like why are you guys on TV right now?
Starting point is 00:41:53 I was very concerned, because I love Lisa Rinna, and I love her on this show. But by her own confession in this scene, she bases on nothing. She talks about how she's set out of the drama and like there's been too much petty bullshit that she's not deeply invested in I'm like no you we I like you when you are invested in your petty bullshit and there were a lot of people a few years ago who are like Lee Serrina doesn't have her
Starting point is 00:42:16 own storyline just bring anything to it I'm like no now you're seeing Lee Serrina without a storyline and now you see what it's like let's's go back to let's bring old Lee server in the back Okay, you had your nice you had your season off come back to the show now And I got I got scared because Jonathan Anton showed up and he's like the ghost of Bravo past It's like this is a sign Lisa you have to kick it up and to hide your next season Otherwise you'll wind up like Jonathan Anton gone from our TV Yeah, she's like, look at me. I'm not fighting with anyone.
Starting point is 00:42:47 I'm like Yoda. I'm like, they killed off Yoda. So spoiler alert. And Jonathan's like, well, I think, I think Rena that you orders like smart and beautiful and lovely and hilarious and tall and QVC successful and like just the best thing. It's okay. I already paid you it's okay and Mary goes you are for sure the nicest woman I've ever met she goes that's the truth you've been married to some real bitches so Teddy and Kyle
Starting point is 00:43:19 are doing jumping jacks and cars like people still do these. I had to do them every day back when I used to ride horses on the weekends. Huh. Yeah, they're talking about... Kind of obsessed with some of those bathing suits and cars like, yeah, but I was a little tortured about the other night because like, nobody's honest and I'm wondering if everybody ever to see American women. But I'm like, you want to talk about honesty. You recast your mother.
Starting point is 00:43:45 It's like a super sweet person played by Alicia Silverstone. Let's talk about rewriting history. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, so they're talking about the girls. And Teddy's like, I just want everyone to stop kissing everyone else's asses. I'm like, is this gonna be the new, this is the new thing that they're doing now.
Starting point is 00:44:02 Everyone's kissing everyone's asses. They are though. They are, it's true. And Teddy Teddy's like you know Erica just sat there was quiet and she could have squashed this whole thing And she just sat there and like her being quiet was like her yelling on me and like if Erica just said like order two I would have taken it and I'll take it Yeah, I'll take it you know whatever and I like when she goes We do similarly I cry she cries, but it's just because we're sensitive and crowd's like, I'm going to run to the pillow lands. I'm running to the pillow lands.
Starting point is 00:44:32 It's like, all win. Was I the only one who was getting distracted by the fact that they were doing so many squats because the camera kept going up and down? I was like, okay, this is too much for me. I mean, it's bad enough putting Teddy and Kyle together on screen but as squats into it, I just blackout. I Missed the days when they would do stupid things like do a fake amazing race do Beverly Hills and just fighting a You see here we are with those spare tires again. We're like member Yolanda. Wasn't that fun? Get it together Beverly Hills
Starting point is 00:45:01 Landa wasn't that fun. Get it together, Beverly Hills. Ugh. So at Velarossa, the dogs are rough housing and it becomes like the rough housing. So that's what young people do. That's Jackson Waxi, hopefully getting another chance. After he gave me the double finger, the double ball, the other angel with their sub-dick Diana. Then we see Monroe, the shaggy dog, who entered the picture last week or so.
Starting point is 00:45:28 She's like, this gorgeous dog came into our lives and was very, very sad. But with a little love, she turned into a pleasure chest. Unless you turn into a porn source or sex-wise. I know. Lisa's restaurants are close enough to the actual sex store to be calling her dog that. Yeah, just saying that, saying that about her dog. She's like, we can keep her as long as we don't call her Monroe. There's already one Monroe who's gonna grow up presenting Jeff Lewis. He doesn't need another. I just like to think
Starting point is 00:46:00 that Lisa had a really traumatic experience watching too close for comfort once. She's like, no, I just like to think that Lisa had a really traumatic experience watching too close for comfort once. She's like, no, I can't see him in row. Not enough in row. So the guy Lisa gets another dog. They're really, they're really turn it up here. What was the name of the guy I played in the row on that show again? I forget his name.
Starting point is 00:46:19 He's dead now. We live. Oh darn, never mind. Spoiler alert. He's going to have to look it up. One row. Two. I love that you have Crumpet magazine.
Starting point is 00:46:29 You have Crumpet Corner magazine in one tab. And then row from two clothes for comfort and another two. Jim J Bullock. Jim J Bullock is dead, huh? No, he is alive. Look up, Jim J Bullock dead. I'm on his Wikipedia page.
Starting point is 00:46:44 And as far as I can tell tell there was no death just born. You're the 10-night, 10-night died. I will not confuse Jim J. Bullock with anybody else. How did you tell? We love you. You confused him with someone who died. I just drew Tammy Faye on my notes because we talked about Jim J and they were friends. Do you think Jim J. Bullock will come on as a guest on our show?
Starting point is 00:47:03 Got me more from the grave maybe He is alive I know what I keep saying he's dead. He's gonna want to come on our show But he had a crystal he had a crystal method addiction Where are there you go? But he's alive On meth Okay, it's a carls new house She's like I can't find anything. And I'm like,
Starting point is 00:47:25 you need to stop this. And they keep talking about that house, how that house is so old and it looks like a plantation house. And then she's like, I want to stay true to the roots of the house. I'm like, he just said roots in a plantation house. I can't with you. Yeah, she said she likes the old world vibe. First of all, there's nothing that's old world in Los Angeles. This city was founded like 40 years ago, okay. Second of all, I think that's really, that was really, that was really mine. That was really, really, really, really, really, really,
Starting point is 00:47:53 I was like, who? I was like, who? Second of all, we should also mention the fact that Lisa Rename Monroe to Binky Boo, which I feel like is such a worse name. Let's go from a name that sounds sort of sophisticated to something that sounds like child talk. Pinky Boo! Let's go from a movie star who died under mysterious circumstances to a mean ghost in Pac-Man.
Starting point is 00:48:20 Let's go from a cast member wacky neighbor on too close for comfort To the mother from too close from comfort Murio I bet you didn't see that one coming fine. Thank you, boo. Mm So Kyle is walking around her house and Glenn has a ham tray. So we already spoiled that one That's a fruit platter. I guess it was a ham tray. It could have been ham I might it's who knows you know how my memory works. I'm like, I was carrying a tray of pizza. Like I don't know if you know I don't remember things right. Um, this is the copy speaking because I'm caffeinated And I just have to get this out of my head and tell you this. I should have told you this before the show
Starting point is 00:48:57 Starve and we weren't recording, but I feel like I have to tell you because I will never remember to tell you And I want you to know this. I made some delicious coconut rice last night That's where that's what Beverly Hills is doing to us. It was so good. It was so good. Have you ever made coconut rice before? No Would you like to know do you like coconut rice? No Fine, so everyone loves Kyle's house. Everyone's like oh my god There's this like old world feeling to it. I'm like, there's like one dork column, you know, but she, you know, it is a nice house. And I mean, I couldn't,
Starting point is 00:49:35 I didn't feel like it was a sort of house where you could smell the scent of coconut rice, is wafting off the stow-top. Yeah. Like a certain department here in Hollywood. Um, face to a terrible decorator. I'll tell you that they have a stupid Chanel pillow or Chanel blanket hanging off the couch. Like, yes, Kyle, you're rich. Congratulations. So then she also does all of them says that she's a bitch. And then Teddy comes over and she's like, is it timely?
Starting point is 00:50:04 Spice and then Rina comes in and guess what Rina says because you're not gonna believe this. She goes, whoa are you kidding me? Are you kidding me, Ryan? Look at this old world, old world charm. I feel like I feel like I'm back in the mother country. I don't know what mother country it is Just something old world. This is something the Savannah brunt could get it. Look at see Savannah Bob. My in-manor case cottage. Am I in any case cottage? During the blitz. Manor comes like. The house is beautiful. It's kind of romantic family. How father of the bride.
Starting point is 00:50:45 I'm about some like you know she means the original and I wish Rana was here to call her old. And this is the sort of house that could earn itself an architectural spread in crumpets called the Lee. They're getting an architecture now. Crumpet called a sex. Crumpetection Digest. I can't, I can't. So anyway, yeah, they're all there standing around because there's like no couches to sit on yet and That's a lie. They said on a calculator. I get it. So they're all standing around and They're like first first cause like everyone's like cheers to the reads fashion show because we ruined it earlier and everything and Dreads like oh, I wouldn't cheers to the new house cheers the new house
Starting point is 00:51:41 Because I I want to show them a bigger person and I'm gonna cheers to cheers to you, even though I want to ruin your night, the way you ruin mine. Even the car ruined yet another night for me. I'm going to support and use stupid sinner blanket. Cheers to your fashion show. Now when we left, we went in a good place. Who wants to talk about how much I had to read of the car? Or underwear on Eric and Jane last year or I don't know what else has happened on this so anyone guess who I took a taxi with at the end of the Beverly Beach show that's one secret you'll never know exo exo gossip pump anybody want to say hi to Binky Boo, Binky Boo, Binky Boo, Binky Boo, Binky Boo,
Starting point is 00:52:27 and there you not know who Binky Boo is. He's on the cover of Crumpet Corner. Oh, poor Dorit, never made it on the cover of magazine Did she? So this is so funny, because Vanderfons trying to start a fight in the cheers. And then Dury's like, ah, trust the shame. So this is so funny because Vanderfums trying to start a fight in the cheers and then Jerry's like, oh, trust the shame. And Rindy goes, thanks to American girl, whatever. And Erica goes, just whatever, cheers.
Starting point is 00:52:53 Yeah. Well, the thing is that Erica's, it sort of all comes out and Erica realizes now that she's going to get hammered for being quiet before. So she does this really hasty apology. It's like, uh, so look, I'm sorry, I didn't didn't say anything i was confused i didn't know what i was saying but of course you of course uh... you had nothing to do with it it wasn't gonna fall to zom i feel like it's gonna nothing to do with you exonerated free tada bye bye i'm the presidential sweet there's never fit in my back here that's not what we remember
Starting point is 00:53:18 and it's like oh so that's why you stole that call and crowd's like um sorry i guess i'm're amazing. Well, okay now everything's okay You guys want to watch TV? It's like cool Cool. I'm gonna show that I'm shattered But I'm not gonna be mean like Kyle. I'm here to support Kyle. That's what I'm gonna do I just don't have any more fight in me. I'm like, okay relax. Okay Relax Hillary Clinton. Okay, you should have not been through like
Starting point is 00:53:48 two years of intense the lip and link. She's like, oh, it's like I'm gonna talk about the e-mail similar. We got if anyone needs me, I'll be walking in the woods in Chapacua. So, I was like, in order for this has to be a home, there's things I need to do to it. Well, someone called him over so I can kick her out. Okay, thanks. Well, she, first of all, she starts giving her one a tour and she shows them this perfectly lovely banister and she's like, um, yeah, this banister, we're going to make it rot iron with brass.
Starting point is 00:54:23 I'm like, what, what, what what what happened to old world charm I'm like this is classic fey classic fey resonant replacing a perfectly lovely wooden banister with rot iron and brass it's pretty bad so then they go into the closet and she's like I have to get on the ladder to reach my berkins and Teddy's like yeah and they show all these berkins like wow so many berkins that will surely be there forever. Yeah. Teddy basically stole all those Berkins. Teddy and Glenn. They were together. It was like set it off. The ham that Berkin built. At the hand that rocked the Berkins. The Italian Berkins.
Starting point is 00:55:05 So, I was like, my last series was when I was five years old. I'm like, your last series was ER. What are you talking about? I was like, when you were five years old. It's like, it was a natural fit that I'd just go behind the camera. I think she said it was her first series just when she was five, not the last.
Starting point is 00:55:21 She said her last. I was like, are we pretending? You don't know George Glynnie and you were an under five on ER. Come on. So it's time to watch American Woman. And they show last. I was like, are we pretending you don't know George Clooney and you were an under five on the yard? Come on. So it's time to watch American Woman and they show it, they show like a little clip, but there's some random joke where, where at least his overstones has to someone.
Starting point is 00:55:34 The only thing Greg wants to see fat on you is your pocketbook and Kyle's like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, and everybody else is just staring at her like, wait, what? It's crying. They're like, this is the saddest thing I've ever seen Your mom's horrible Yeah, and they show this scene where where Kyle's mom leaves that tell the daughters that the dad left and Teddy's bawling and she's like She's like no, this triggers me it reminds me of you know like when I was a kid and and my dad left and we had to move into a condone. It just brings up a lot of motion.
Starting point is 00:56:06 I was like oh thanks for introducing a storyline in the last five minutes of the season. You know kidding all we care about is John Kigger. Nagger talking about him it's over. She goes that's an adult you block out memories and you see a trigger which is also a horse which I don't know. I'm like I was like it blocks out all the memories except the horse memories. Which is also a horse which I don't know I was like it blocks out all the memories except the horse memories. Yeah, it's like I'm watching I'm wiping off my tears with the passion me now because I don't use clean eggs because I'm petty. I don't want to waste And to read like oh
Starting point is 00:56:37 The sister's feel about just stealing the storyline Drowned a bit of the hotel called Hamilton and stealing homes and like, I don't know, they haven't seen it yet. And she's all victim-y. Carly, we've been on TV yet. Maybe invite him over and stop stealing all their clients. Exactly. So then we go into the end of the episode or the season, really, when they start doing the little summaries
Starting point is 00:57:00 and they change tradition by not like putting their heads in a little box or something. They just sort of put a weird filter on the screen and put a bad font up. And so the first update is Kyle. And this is like a... this sucks. It says, basically, over Christmas Kyle's new house is burglarized. And nearly all of her watches, handbags, and jewelry were stolen, including irreplaceable items that belonged to her mother.
Starting point is 00:57:26 I'm like, damn. Somewhere in Tent City, there's a tent made out of Birken bags and Kim's like, come on man! Yeah, I was Ken, Kim's ex lover. He's like, I'm like, I mean, the sad part is that like, there was so much foreshadowing we didn't even realize because remember there was that whole thing that Kyle said a few episodes ago about like her old house being the good luck house and nothing but good things have happened in this house and she hopes the next house
Starting point is 00:57:54 It's nothing but good things also and then boom like robbed of thousands of thousands of dollars and None of it's been wrote. This has been found yet. Oh So sad and her $1 million house. I know. I know it well and none of it has been found yet. Oh, so sad. In her $1 million house. I know. Well, I mean, yes, there is, but it does suck. Especially the stuff from her mom.
Starting point is 00:58:12 Yeah. It's a way to go, Edwin. Sure. Nice security system there. You'll never work this out again. And again. Yeah, do you think it's a coincidence that then Edwin and Teddy buy a $4 million house?
Starting point is 00:58:24 Yeah, that's, yeah. gets a coincidence that then Edwin and Teddy buy a $4 million house. Yeah, that's yeah, yeah, that's that's what Teddy's update is. She's like, I've learned I'm true to who I am. And it's like Teddy moved into a new house. She paid $2 million less than asking. I think that is so Teddy. She's like, oh, good, you have. So all of Geri swim suits are named after her girlfriends. The Erico is featured in sports illustrated and the LVP sold out within days. Yes. It's just hilarious. What is the LVP?
Starting point is 00:58:53 Police at Vannapump. I know, but what is that bathing suit? Like what would it be? It's like ads. It's like, it has wings on it. What is broken? It's probably like a one piece that like has like sort of shorts attached to it and it's like red and white striped.
Starting point is 00:59:10 It's like shorts. You know how like in the 20s it's like shorts. Yeah. Like the Teddy bear never made it into production, which is funny. Yeah. I know and Teddy went crazy on her on Twitter. She's like, I don't need a fucking bathing suit named after me. Any it.
Starting point is 00:59:24 Well, maybe, well, maybe just the designs for it were turned in late. Get it? So, Rina, it says, Rina is like, I know, like, I just don't feel like confronting injustice anymore. I'm like, you better start. And then the her update is that she's doing a 90th birthday for Lois, and Lois is, we'll sing a dance if Erica does the choreography. See, that's when you know you've done nothing for a season when they have to just come up with some random shit to put in your ending ending card. When I have to bring up your mom who's in one episode. Yeah. Exactly. So Erica's book debuted at number nine on the New York Times bestseller list.
Starting point is 01:00:00 And while promoting Erica reveal she spends 40,000 a month on everything it takes to be Erica Jane It's expensive to be her. It's like okay, so you're rich. Mm-hmm and Lisa Teddy's cheap Teddy's cheap. Well, Teddy is not cheap. She's just a good negotiator maybe and then Lisa's talking about her about Pinky Boo And she's like I got another dog that looks like Ken, which is funny because when she got Pinky Boo, I was like, these dogs all kind of look like Ken. At least she's weird.
Starting point is 01:00:29 I've always said that's Ken's wigs are all those dogs. It's a big farm for Ken. Yeah, you do say that. I just copped in your face too, how'd you like that? Oh. So you're like, oh, you did do that. Not on my coconut rice. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:42 Stop trying to make coconut rice happen, Ben. You're gonna make it now. I'm I'm planting the seed in your brain. Well, Rinna, this is why we'll always love Rinna, even on season, she decides to just not even show up for work because Lisa goes, we got another one. It looks like Ken. I don't know why we keep doing that. And we're gonna go, it's called Narcissism. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha and Lisa's update is that Vittor from Dogs has placed over 500 dogs in homes, of course only the pretty dogs, and no due dogs, but she has no intention to have any new dogs, at least as long as they are still grandchildren on their rise in Pandy. Open your beavers short like Eric, Jane, come maybe sad. And that's that. That was the end of the season. And now we have our unions to look forward to and
Starting point is 01:01:49 we don't have a we don't have any Crappin spotlight this week. So that means that we are here Probably at the end of our episode. That means we are here by finished. We are Fennel Shazad. I'm gonna go put something in my brand new Birken bag that I got mysteriously. Has Ken's hand print on it. I'm looking at my giant gold watch that I just found somehow in my couch. Hey, there's a ham platter in my Birken bag. What if it was us who robbed Kyle? Could you imagine we're just so brazen to brag about it on the podcast hiding in plain sight? It's like giving each other shit.
Starting point is 01:02:31 Your purse is South-Rise since like, I'll back. I mean, and, you know, I'm sure they were all insured, but it just the, uh, the, uh, the, the mom stuff I do feel bad about that, just because she has that crazy relationship with her mom and you know That sucks. I don't know. You know me. I get these like weird moments of sentimentality and like Feeling bad for these people on these shows sometimes You know that's so nice of you. It happens. I can't help it guys I'm you know because we can be caddy and we can be bitches, but at the end of the day I've been thinking about this a lot.
Starting point is 01:03:08 I'm still just like a fan of all these people, you know? I just... socks on my fan. You know what? At the end of the day, I really care about Berkins. Yeah, I'm a fan of Berkins. I'm a fan of Glenn. When a Berkin goes missing, any joy and sweat. Whenever a Berkin goes missing, Glenn gets a tray of ham. So Gland is like standing on a bridge about to end it all like Glenn. Lico, that's a world would be like without you.
Starting point is 01:03:39 Yeah, Bernie Wilson, cheesecake party, a bit without Glenn. People falling into the smiley face pool. No, I need to be there If it had the proper party or no, but no, but no, not to step in the pool. That's a wonderful ham All right, well, let's wrap Let's wrap this up and get out of here, being um, it's the usual wrap-up spiel guys go to watch a crap and calm When you go there, you'll find links to all our social media and you should follow us because we are hilarious on social media Or we at least exist And then of course we are doing shows like in so many cities
Starting point is 01:04:19 You have to come get a ticket to our live shows because they're great And don't worry about coming alone. We have a lot of people who come alone and then everyone becomes friends and it's like a best moment of their life. We had a great time. How are you? How are you? You never know. Some of our shows we've had contested in, we went, we went over our costume contest in Irvine. She counted Lua herself like the photo and if that's not an honor, I don't know what it is. So go buy tickets to the photo and if that's not an honor I don't know what it is. So go buy tickets to the shows and we're back tomorrow to discuss like only the best show on all of television speaking of the good fight. The good fight. The good fight. It's the real housewives of New York City so I mean
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