Watch What Crappens - RHOBH Faux Furs/Cold Shoulders
Episode Date: February 28, 2018The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills celebrates NYC with a failed Frankel takedown and Kyle's new store opening. Also, Dorit tries to figure out what vampires are. Enjoy! This week's bonus a ...catch up of Married To Medicine! To hear it, become a premium subscriber at http://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens ***Crappens Live is coming to Chicago, San Francisco, Phoenix, Irvine, DC, Detroit and Houston! Find ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts!
It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates.
Cameras off! Voice only!
Launching during Pride!
Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes,
Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few.
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For all of our bonus episodes and premium content, become a member over at patreon.com slash watch what crap ends
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We'll see you there I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind.
I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors! Kristi, why were you dourty?
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Hello and welcome to the Watch What Crapin's podcast.
The podcast dedicated to broken birds!
We love to watch Bravo with us.
I'm Ronny Karam from the Roseprix Bachelor podcast.
And here I am with my gorgeous little put together bird in
Mandelker of the B side blog and the Banta Blenda. Hello, hello, how are you?
How are you? Good.
Good. I'm over there. Yeah. Yeah.
Are you so good? How are you feeling? How are you feeling?
Like shit, I'm still on my sick bed, but I love being in bed. So there's only so much I can complain.
Oh, well, that explains it because I can hear you.
Uh, hold your holding your microphone, right?
Oh, no, what, what, what noise am I making?
No, it's just I, I hear every now and then it just sounds like you're just like rearranging
yourself. So just warning the listeners if you hear that noise, it's the sound of
dear, Elling Ronnie trying to get comfortable in his bed.
Please be patient with him.
I'm comfortable. I'm just wondering if the like if the cord is is hitting something or if you hear that
sign tell me we can all we can all live okay you it's what's important is that you recover
and you you are sick so you deserve to be in a comfortable place and if we hear a thumb
every now and then we're all gonna survive are we not people are we not pretend you're
all talking back to me right now?
We'll recover by Houston.
I'm gonna do a Julia Sugar Baker monologue.
I swear, if I have to hear a thump for every single time that you have to take a good breath,
then by my golly I will take a thump because that is what you deserve right now.
Ronnie Carham, now you hear me right now.
Now here's what I have to say to you, cold and flu,
Jim,
like a, oh,
there goes Julia Sugar Baker telling off the cold.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
So guys, crop ends live is going to be in Houston,
March and I, which is like next week.
So good last tickets because they're over there.
There's only a few left.
And then we're still going to be doing live shows all over the damn place. We're going to go to Detroit two weeks later. We're going to
do other places. We'll be so we have Houston on the 9th Detroit on the 24th. Then about like we
going to have after that, we got two shows in DC, which are sold out, which is awesome. And then
about two weeks after that or a week after that, something like that on the 15th, we're doing a
show in Irvine, California, Orange County, California. There may
be a certain Bravo show that's filmed down there. We have something cool lined up that we're
going to announce pretty soon. But that's going to be fun. We're really excited. I'm
just like, I'm actually really excited for, I'm excited to announce what we have and also
excited to experience what we have and also excited to experience what we have. We've lined up for that show. I'm really excited about it.
Sexual massages.
Puppy adoptions.
But only cute ones.
Only cute ones.
Yes, it is real housewives of Beverly Hills Day, if you couldn't tell.
And what? Yes, it is real housewives of Beverly Hills day if you couldn't tell and what an episode, you know
One of my friends I was texting back and forth with forth with when the show was on and she was like this show is so boring
I can't even I was like are you kidding me because this has like every
amazing real housewives of Beverly Hills
amazing real housewives of Beverly Hills.
Trope. Yes, like it has everything it's supposed to have, you know?
And I will not have your horrible attitude.
I love every moment of it.
People get like really every season, people are like,
nothing's happening, nothing's happening.
I like they just argue about stupid stuff.
I'm like, have you been watching this show
since the beginning?
That's like every season of Beverly Hills, nothing happens.
And they just get over it, it's something small and petty.
And then light, frilly music plays and Kyle Richards
gets a choked-up voice at some points.
And that's it.
Kyle, and it works.
It's like, previously, Kyle's like,
you can't handle not being the center of attention
for two minutes, you're being an asshole.
I'm like, really, Kyle? Why don't you cry some more in front of one of your
grams? And then do the splits. So the episode opens up in a place that we're not really expecting,
which is Camille Grammer. Camille Grammer opens up our Beverly Hills show, which is a nice call back
to days of your. Yes, she's like, I'm so proud of my dad, because she's doing so
great. Like that's your big deal for her because it's really hard being a part of the child of, you know,
like, you know, Frazier, Beijero, and well, me, and youoid. It's so fascinating.
Yeah.
So because basically Camille's daughter Mason is now a model, much like all these Beverly Hills
kids are.
Also, FYI, a jar.
That took me a second.
Sorry, because it's so stupid.
I was like, who would make their child after a jar?
And hey, everybody, his name Mason, I'm so sorry, I just couldn't help it.
So they're basically at the Malam Praton fashion show.
And Malam Praton himself shows up, because I don't know who anyone is.
And then when he shows up, I was like, oh my god, I remember you.
You're from Project Runway.
And also from, he's like pops up on these real house I've shows all the time like Durinda or something like that and he's like hello how are you
Yeah, I put the limpy guy from rock rocky horse show
Alternate Mike Myers playing me as an old dead person with a bull cut
Is that terrifying human being he's like, he's a terrifying human being. He's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like Take care. So sweet. What a swimmer.
So what kind of fashion show is this?
There's pizza boxes everywhere.
I mean, what the hell?
And then some other stylist comes up to Mason and goes,
make up hair.
Can we do something about this top?
And then Mason goes, I can take it off.
What the hell is happening in this scene?
Maybe it's just like teenage mutant in turtle chic, you know, pizza boxes everywhere.
She's like the April O'Neal.
Um, anyway, so while Mason's getting ready in here and makes Kyle and Teddy getting the back of a bus,
like the event, I should say to go to the fashion show And they're sitting behind Lisa and Doreet. And it's just like quiet and awkward. And everyone just has black sunglasses
on and staring forward. Kyle is literally signing something. What did you bring Silverware
from the room to sign on your way? She's like, I'm signing my watch right now. Really,
really hard. What are you signing? Yeah. Okay, adjusting. Adjusting myself in bed.
And I'm just...
And I'm just... And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just...
And I'm just... And I'm just... And I'm just... And I'm just... And I'm Technical School. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired all the time, guys.
And this is like, I've just come out to Chiffin-Ube.
I've just been tired.
I feel like a place where you go,
fix a flat tire, it's called just tires,
except I'm just tired.
And Carl's like, I didn't even,
there's you as capable of not talking for this long.
I'm scared.
Yeah.
And Renov course is just trying to break the tension by going, well, this should be
exciting.
I wonder how to live a bell is doing.
Okay, she's not picking up.
I want to have the rats doing.
Hello, rat.
Oh, yeah. I'm a baby
Ratton, just watch that her shoes commercial
I had to reassure one of our listeners that we are not in fact hyperventilating when we do our lead
Serena impersonation just think of it like you know like I trump a players can like they
They train themselves be able to like breathe and blow at the same time, you know, so that they can have a big long
No, like, that's a real life. Yeah, yeah, they're just like it. So like don't be stressed out for us because people online
We're saying I don't like it when they do the least of written impersonation because I get stressed that they're gonna pass out
Don't worry. Well, I'm not really fine. I'm not
I'm not
I just die a long time ago and this is just stolen my fine. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation.
I'm not in the situation.
I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not in the situation. I'm not that noise I just made I did accidentally almost joke yes of course myself so the woman arrive at
the intrepid where the Malambartan show is taking off which is appropriate because Camille does sound
like planes taking off of an aircraft carrier or time. Hi way to the danger zone. He flew too close, Maverick. Here's my line for Tereet.
Yon.
Oh my gosh.
So, yeah, they're on the intrapid and Tereet's like, see, Lisa and Kyle is so comfortable.
I have nothing to see. I don't want to be here. I'm like, what good luck because you're entering a boat. And that's not ever a good sign as we've learned.
I'm terribly sorry guys, I have to leave it.
I'm getting a little bit of sea sickness and I have to go to like the boat is angered and
not moving.
Guys, PK is going to arrive soon.
And I want everyone to say surprise, PK, surprise.
No, this is a fashion show.
We're not doing PK's 50th birthday again.
Guys, guys, are we sure that the fashion show starts now?
It's only 1 PM.
And I have it slated for 4.30 PM.
And I'm afraid we're a bit too early.
I like when they're walking through the boat Vanderpump is trying to get the mood up so she goes
about that's Kuhl.
Kuhl and Gruevie, I was thinking I should put Sarah on a boat, Sarah C, do you like that?
So C, oh look what I did. the gashup at Sarah on a boat. Sarah at sea. Do you like that? So see.
Oh, look what I did.
So they're all being dragons or overhead.
So they're all on the boat getting ready for getting in like,
getting their seats for the fashion show.
And we see backstage and the designers like,
turn, wait, Heshule's.
I'm like, oh my god, models, really.
Come on. Tie your damn shoe.
So, so Mason walks, she looks beautiful. He's like, pictures,
the all the pressures, like that's the sound of a flashbulb to him.
Erica is wearing blind glasses. She's wearing cataracts. I just heard some cataracts.
Yeah, she's wearing cataracts.
I have sympathy cataracts from Tom.
I wear these so I don't have to see Tom
with his laymas and leg there and feel sympathy.
It's a costume today.
I just want to wear one of the ones I want to wear.
What do I want to be? I want to make it fun for myself
I wasn't just wearing things so I decided I want to be Tom after those characters
So here I am. I'm gonna limp too. Well look at that outfit over there
Oh that looks like Pritz and the revolution
No
And then the designers like it's popcorn and ice cream. It's like that's you you guys need to get on the same page
It's popcorn and ice cream. It's like that's you you guys need to get on the same page
Somehow I miss that, but that's hilarious. I really good. Oh my god. I am so proud of Camille for being so proud I get it because I have daughters
So Lisa goes up to Mason and Camille and is like,
Congratulations, do you both?
Mason, in honor of this moment, I have offered you an honorary hostess role.
Let's say.
Now listen, it's already one step up from entry,
cleaning mess off the ground voluntarily,
and having sex with James Kennedy.
Do you think you're up for the challenge?
You can do it!
Just answer Lala's questions when she says,
Hey girl, you say, hey!
And she goes, what's going on?
You say, not much, slow day.
And then she says, I know.
And you say, I know.
That's all you have to do.
Think, pick up and hang up the
lad line so people think that people are calling are you familiar with a
filet manion special
yeah welcome I loved this when she went up to her because she kind of touches
her shoulder first of all Mason looks like she about to be hit by her butt. She's like, blink, blink, blink, blink, don't hurt me.
And Vanderpump's like, congrats to both.
And I mean it.
And then she goes, you've been through a lot.
Well done.
Goodbye.
And just walks off.
Love it.
I mean, I would be like, that would be a major one for me. If Lisa Vanderpum
came up to me, said, good job on your podcast. I mean it. Goodbye. I'd be like, Oh my God,
we're done. We can hang up the podcast clothes. Whatever it is.
Just close.
The podcast hat. What are the people so you can hang up my hat now?
You can hang your hat. Yeah. Something like that, benchmark.
So now everyone piles back into a van and ran as like,
Kyle, Kyle, what are we wearing to your store tonight?
What's the vibe?
I'm like, I think the vibe are boxes and empty space
because this place is already closed up.
Did you see that?
It looked like it. No. Kyle by Eileen too has, or this, it already closed up. Did you see that? It looked like it.
No.
Kyle by Eileen too has art, it closed this weekend.
Oh no.
Just kidding.
Actually, well according to them, it didn't close.
They relocated, but basically they had a huge store
as you could see.
And this weekend, people walk by and it's empty
and they're packing it up
and they say they relocated to a place called the shoe box and they're like they're like a corner
of the store. So, you know, I mean it's cop. So, we get a shot of everybody getting ready and
Erica's getting her legs brushed. I don't know why I wrote that, but it was the funniest thing to me.
And Mikey's like, wow, we just going to night.
That's where we going.
You know, Mikey, it's on your fucking eye, Kyle.
Mikey, Mikey, why does he look like he's always just finished a blowpop, you know, or like
a toots pop?
Like, it's like, there's like a deep redness all around his lips and inside.
I was like, Mikey, lay off the red candies.
I think he's obsessed with a Carly Jenner challenge.
He's doing it wrong.
He's like doing it inside.
So, Eric was like, God, that's a lot of spells.
You can tell because it says fake on the inside.
And he's like, oh my God, done.
Caught on the first.
Caught on the first and he's like oh my god
And then one of the other glam squad guys is like I want to like experiment with like a hair piece Sheer look at this hair piece he picks up a hair piece. It's just oh looks like a octopus. My it looks nothing like an octopus
I know I was like wait a minute circle
I have a special number for you bang you don't have bang
oh like about to put sex in the dubster and I'm like, yeah, yeah, I'm like, I'm not saying that our
jokes are any better, but they're like laughing, like, they're
like watching Erica's HBO comedy special. That's why I have a
glam spot because they laugh at everything like it's the
fun thing they ever heard. Well, that's why she flies them
everywhere, girl.
So, Kyle is getting styled and she's like,
oh my god, people just-
By the way, and I think that her makeup girl is the same one that Teresa uses.
I feel like I recognized her, which I feel like it's a bad, bad omen for any store opening.
Or book.
Book for anything.
Anyway, we're saying Kyle's getting styled and she's like, I've been toying with
Cut for a really long time, but you know, like everyone's gonna wonder, did I cut my hair?
Because I'm gonna take a risk and fake it.
And then Renekas, knock, knock, knock.
And I'm like, of course, Renek literally says knock, knock, knock.
Hi, hi, hello.
I brought you all a croissant.
Just kidding.
I couldn't find any.
And I wouldn't get one if I could.
It's carbs.
Carrocos, is that Rina?
I was like, who else says knock knock knock instead of knocking on the door?
Yeah.
Only Rina would do that, okay?
So we're gonna say, so,
tell me, what's up?
Let's talk attitudes.
Yes.
Let's get serious.
Let's get serious now Kyle Richards.
Yeah, let's talk about this college.
I said the talk show, Kyle Richards.
Come on, let's talk about the Kyle Richards.
Kyle, I want to know.
Everyone's like, I still don't understand what's going on.
Do I really want to know?
I really want to know. Kyle's like, well, I was understand what's going on. Do I really want to know? I really want to know.
And Kyle's like, well, I was just trying to defend Vanderpump.
Huh?
Is that my real hair?
Did you just cut my real hair?
You're like, she's like, it's fake.
I'm watching.
Don't worry.
I'm watching so Vanderpump.
What did she do?
What did Vanderpump do?
What did she do?
And why are you helping her with it?
Okay.
This is like working with her Russians.
Non. None.
Oh,
not
Rina is playing a major long game here. She's just, she's been very low key this season. She's barely
even been on the show, you know, but she's just sitting there waiting for this to erupt and she's
just going to pound. She's read it up out. She has, she is just getting every little dig in
at Vanderpump that she can and it's hilarious because she thinks Vanderpump can't see it
And guess what Vanderpump can't because she's done like that and when she's like remember when I finally forgave you and we hugged and then I made sexual jokes at you on the dance floor
I thought that was the bridge to tapethy
The bridge to terabita
Which bridge the Brooklyn breeze. I don'ty. No, the bridge to terabiza. What am I, which bridge?
The Brooklyn Bridge, I don't know.
Which ever bridge doesn't count at all.
Darling.
I hear tapethas back on Bravo.
Did someone build the bridge?
Can't eat.
Sorry, I'm dying in the middle of your lines.
So, Carol's like, oh yeah,
and then after all that,
Doreen is gonna take a cab and Vanderpromp said,
I'll ride with you.
And I was like, oh my God,
this is like, this is like hearing world history
all over again, Carol.
It's like the most depressing, it's the saddest,
it's the most horrific story you've just gone through.
Wow.
I know.
So, and of course, Runa's back in college.
She's like, you know, you would, baby, you would have taken a bullet from a Vanderprompang baby. and of course, Rina's back in the couch. She's like, you would have, you would have taken a bullet for a band of pump baby.
Of course, you're a good friend.
You're a defender all the time, baby.
Almost ridiculous, baby.
I'm like, yes, but her up, bring her to your side.
And so, Rina's like, three sons don't work ever, baby, ever, ever.
Every hell is these two trouble.
It's huge trouble.
Now, these 40-year-old women woman having problems with the threesome.
It's a threesome.
It's a threesome.
Imagine apples and oranges and a pineapple.
It doesn't work.
It's a threesome.
It's raining cats and dogs and parents.
No, it's too many.
The threesome.
I like this.
I like when she goes, hey, guess what Kyle Pitchertz.
You wrote yourself under a bus for her. And she has well done a bus.
And then Kyle, because I feel like I'd been shit on. Who did anything to you, Kyle? Shut up.
Okay. You start everything and then you cry about it. And now you've been on the guy
damn phone with Bethany Frankl to sick her after Vanderpump. Good luck bitch. Good luck. And also good luck with the
repercussions of that. Because Vanderpump, she's still mad at you for she said like 10 years ago,
just wait. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. So now we go to to meet with her squad, her glam squad. And
she's like, you guys, guys, you want to know something crazy? I don't
try things on. Isn't that crazy, guys? Guys. I like the thrill. It's almost like I'm a
three-year-old speaker. Living on the edge, they're a jury, living on the edge. She's like,
I always dress my mood.
So I'm wearing a vampire shit.
I'm like, so you're not in the mood for garlic today.
Is that what you're saying?
I don't get it.
It's because blood was drawn last night.
I'm like, you know that vampires are the ones
who draw blood right?
Exactly.
I'm like, I was like, so are you the vampire
or the vampire's victim?
Is this like the transformation of you into a vampire?
I don't get your story.
I don't get your fashion story, Doreet.
Doreet in one word, muddled, okay?
I'm not like a bot in this shit.
So Doreet goes, yes, vampires!
It's a symbol!
It's a symbol.
Someone just please let Doreet out to go pee.
Can someone give Doreet a biscuit in a proper biscuit glass?
Please, she needs...
She needs to go ki-ki.
I would love to see, by the way, I would love a big business reboot with Doree two Doreetes. It would just be too amazing. They can't even tell themselves apart.
The whole movie would be the bathroom scene of Doreet finding Doreet. Just be like waving
our hands left and right and dancing. Guys, it's part people, it's part people.
This two vampires in this bathroom, who's gonna eat who?
Guys, I pay $10 for this haircut.
It's me with a bad haircut.
Look, it's me again, also with a bad haircut.
It's like big business times 30. It's like
multiplicity and big business. This is every Michael Keaton just gets a dumber. Just
Doreet. Oh my. It's a Doreet calls a van and fountain her room and she's like, hello, it's
a van and a pump. It's me, your friend, Doreet.
Can I come check with you up before Kyle show opening?
And the van der pump goes, if you have to.
Again, it's like treating her like a dog that has to pee.
So then we go to Teddy with her glam spot and she's like,
you guys, I'm not gonna lie.
I'm like a walkie zombie tonight.
I'm like, look, so we got vampires, we got zombies.
Who's gonna be the mummy?
Who is gonna be the mummy?
Also, you know that zombies walk.
That's kind of where they're scary.
Guys, I'm like a resting zombie.
I'm like a zombie at rest.
I'm like a zombie taking an happy, guys. But the good news is that even on the zombie, I'm like a zombie at rest. I'm like a zombie taking a nap you guys
But the good news is that even on my zombie. I'm like in shape So like I had like a lot of brains last night. So like I was at six o'clock in the morning
I was like guys we're all going to soul cycle, you know, and you can see like her glam squad
It's like why the fuck did we get stuck with this one? Why can we even get to read we get the one who wakes up at six or to do soul cycle
I don't even like soul cycle
Well, we need to go to soul cycle because we don't have a soul because Rizombies that walk get it
She's like working for me out as who I am. There's no excuses. I'm like fast forward
I grew up working out. I'm sorry man. I grew up working riding horses and then working out
Get rid of her clear her so if I have the thumbs to room to read psych.
Wait, wait, wait, I also like when Teddy makes her joke. She's like, um, well, I need to work
out again tomorrow after hanging out with these ladies. Sign me up. Great one, Teddy.
Celebrity beef. You never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter
or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife.
And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Disantel.
Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened,
and the repercussions.
What does our obsession with these feud say about us?
We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin
and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows.
It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud.
But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon.
Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood.
How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully
crafted narrative designed to sell albums?
Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts.
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So Vanderpump and Dree, inpump threw you. They're like,
and you're double kiss and then Vanderpump has her jacket just on her shoulders.
Like,
quite chilly in here.
And then she sits in front of her desk because that's where Vanderpump is the most comfortable.
Even if it's the hotel desk.
Yeah.
She's like, look,
Rune said this.
I found that.
My desk.
Just because you're wearing a van pon your show doesn't mean that you don't do it on
a nuclear way. I keep, look at me. My jacket is my vampire cape.
And it has a twist.
Um, also right behind her head is a teak at all, of course. I was like, this is so
van der Pomp. I don't even think she set this up. This is just so her. So Doreet's like,
I'm a vampire.
I'm sick.
I've come to suck your blood.
So this is like, did you know that the spot is open at 6 a.m. I've
edited you on my desk.
I had two of the five lucky numbers today. It's all ton channel number two.
Have you heard that catchy tune on the hotel channel? Because da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da So they both just kind of stare at each other. I don't know what the hell Doreet is waiting for, but Vanderfraum's like, well, I was hurt. I've been a good friend to you Doreet.
You've been through luck with this group, but I've always been on your side.
And she's like, I've always been on yours, Lisa.
She's like, nobody's come for me like that.
Doreet.
And she's like, you know, Lisa, Lisa, things just come out of my mouth.
I was upset. Turkey thought. See, it just came out of my mouth.
It just happened.
Banky moon. It happened again.
I cannot carnage.
Lisa, things are coming out.
Pussyplex. I don't even know what that means.
The rain in Spain falls mainly in the plain. Really, sir? I can't hurt myself.
Farfeknüggin, Lisa.
What would you do for a Klondak bar?
I don't even know what that is.
You see, I don't know what I'm talking about, Lisa.
Galapagos Islands, what?
What are fingers? Oh.
There are coughed close to the mic, so you wouldn't feel alone.
So, banner pumps like,
About somebody you care about and drinks like... Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha No, he he he he. There is like, we spoke about it after Lisa. Just yes, but apparently you repeated it to the whole table after and apparently you said I was apparently needy jealous apparently and insecurely apparently.
No, I didn't. I didn't Lisa. I told all the guys that when you walked out of the Pallihouse, you were like, oh, I love my friend. They're so good to me, but I just
have to go right now. And I said, Kyle, look at Lisa. She's so secure. She has all the love in the
world. Kyle. Kyle? Kyle, guys. That was a tall day of school. Thin mint buttercup. Poop, poop.
What? Samoa
Those are girls cat cookies and poop poop but stare to read I'm following you
I find it quite hurtful the Dereet would even repeat that oh
About the pair thing because you said you said I never got attention as a child
I never said that and then there's a clip of her I would have loved to be hugged as a child
Which is not the same as
attention, you know, to be fair technically
Doreet's like
Lisa, I never said you would jealous and needy what I said is you're jealous and needy
See totally different
How could you after all can and I have done for you?
and then How could you after all can and I have done for you? And then so, so Doreet says that Lisa is like, well Lisa you may be in your needy of me and he's like, well your needy of me too.
My voices are getting all screwed up right now.
And he's like, I am needy.
I don't think it's a bad thing either Lisa.
I'm needy. Hold me Lisa. Hold me right now, tell me I'm the best friend ever.
Because condos were friends, Lisa.
And now she's mad that I didn't want you going home alone after your big night,
and to read this, where's that hysterical?
I was like, did you just get out of big mama's house?
Like, where are you right now, Doree? So Doree, of course, is now,
she's like the master of spinning at the other way.
She's like, why would a friend want two friends
to be at odds?
Why is Kyle doing that to us?
She's making it seem like Kyle wants to separate them
from being friends right now.
It's like, oh my God, I want to shake to reach.
She, I mean, it's almost, you almost have to like like revere it because she's so slag of what she's doing
She's turning herself from she's the one who talked shit about Lisa
She's denying that she ever said it and now she's making it seem like Kyle is the one who trying to come in between them
It's almost like that it's almost like art fine art
Yeah, it's like when you okay, you know how far goes a movie or the TV show
It seems like it's gonna be a mystery right because it's a crime show, but it's just people failing spectacularly because they're so stupid.
Yeah, that's a derit. It's like the worst mystery ever, but you just can't stop watching it.
You already know who did it and you already know they're gonna go to jail or die at the end. And it's part of the fun.
Dereets like in her own photo.
They have a woodchip, huh?
So yeah, now Doreet's mad.
She's now mad at Kyle.
And she was like, she can't actually sit there and say I was saying all
these things about you when what she was saying was 10 fold, 10
fold.
Like, no, you are the one saying it to read.
It's on camera.
And then it comes like just because you did, it doesn't make it better.
I don't even know what anybody said and I'm still mad.
I love one.
I love one.
I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one.
I love one.
I love one.
I love one. I love one.
I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one.
I love one. I love one.
I love one. I love one. I love one.
I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one.
I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one. I love one.
I love one. I love one. I love one. She's great. And to be like, Lisa. And then Lisa's like, listen, listen to me. Let me finish. Let me finish non-pandy. Let me finish.
Also, guess who else's relationship was just like this?
Yolanda, member of Vanderpump.
Yeah.
I've friends with your husband. So I'm trying to be nice to you.
You were a little twat. But if you mess with me again,
I'm going to find a fresh tick and stuff it so far up your
room.
The difference is that Yolanda felt like she was the queen bee and she wasn't. Although,
I mean, she did give Lisa a run for her money. I mean, no one has been able to get that
close to knocking down Lisa than Yolanda did and and and and somehow it all got blamed on
Eileen. You know, I mean did her fair share, okay? They all did. They all could try to gank up
and get ready. They are now goodbye Eileen. Hang on Eileen. I mean don't. Oh, there was Eileen.
No longer hanging on. So now to read is all now to read is all flamix that Lisa would say that
she really likes to read only because of pk
And Lisa's like no, no, it's just that like I've known pk for years and years back to England
And I have a great friendship with him
And I would hate if we had an issue that that would like damage that relationship
But to read just yours her saying like I'm I'm friends with you as a favor to that is what she's saying
And she's making it pretty clear. And she's like,
PK is the center of a lot of relationships from Europe.
Hence the crest.
I'm wearing on my jacket right now.
He gave up so much to come here.
Every time he flies a plane, I hear any us singing.
Book of days. Far and away. You know,
PK was a boxer when you came to America. He knows, Nicole,
Kidman, you know, so Vanderpump is Vanderpump knows that she's
now cut to read off in her emotional. You can just see the shade
go down in Lisa Vanderpump's
eyes when she's like, Oh, I see, you're an asshole who's only going to hurt me. Lisa out,
but she can't do that because she can't have this person as a villain either in her life.
So she goes, I'm not going to fall out with you to read because what we have is genuine. And Doreet, sorry, as you say, and Doreet knows her role, which is just a say,
But Lisa, I love you.
I love you Lisa.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you Lisa.
I get it.
And then she tells us, I mean, I'm glad I'm getting some sort of an apology from Doreet,
but she was complicit in talking shit with Kyle about me. Let's not forget that situation
I was like, oh my god. This show now is gonna be going through season 15. I know I I love one least of Antipomples the ultimate victim
You are saying thing is about me. How do you think I feel knowing that you both were saying these things about me?
My feelings would double hurt.
Okay.
Kaya may have been saying something 10 fold, but I was being hurt.
Triple 100.
Fode.
You know, you can't break this more than seven times.
So no, it's nighttime and they're all getting into SUVs and Kyle.
Kyle and Teddy get into an SUV.
And Kyle turns the Teddy and goes,
Teddy, I need you to be fun.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Listen, I know your whole thing is to be like,
maybe I'm Teddy, but this is my store.
So be motherfucking fun tonight
because I'm not gonna have anyone
not be fun at my store.
And Teddy's response, ha ha ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha store. And
Kyle's like I feel weird that Lisa isn't the car like normally should be in the car supporting me, but she's not in the car I'm like Kyle just relax. I'm on your side in this whole mess, but you also have to like chill out.
Kyle is and always has been an asshole and she's purposely doing all this shit and ambushing Lisa and I cannot wait to watch it back fire in her face and she's like
This is supposed to be a fun night for me. I just can't handle having a problem with people I care about really then
Why are you sticking the Bethany on her? I don't fall for this Kyle okay?
Has your sister doing so yeah
Kim I'm a Kyle's like
She's like yeah, it's like it should have been like a fun. It's fashion week. It should have been a fun day and like
Normally would have been like Lisa didn't even call
me this morning to make plans, go to Bergdorfer something like that. I was like, wow, that
early morning Lisa phone call has a real power over people. I mean, Brandi fell from public
grace because she stopped getting that phone call. It like, it fucked up Brandi. Like,
she gave him a head case and they didn't know what to do. And like, you know, next thing
you know, she's now on celebrity big brother, you know,
or not on housewives anymore.
You see that there's so many classic plot points
in housewives.
There's the Muhammad, your husband's friends first.
There's this, I mean, there's just so many
that come into this episode and they all cracked me up.
And then Kyle, so they get out of the, oh, I'm sorry, Kaga's. Yeah, normally we'd be up to go to
Bergerus early. And Teddy goes, I hate that. And then behind them, someone go, a car goes,
Hong Kong, and Teddy goes, that scared me. Good job being fun there, Teddy. Yeah. And then they
get out of the car and Kyle goes, we're here at my store.
It's a Kyle. We're watching this on TV. This isn't an audiobook, okay? They have Kyron's.
I wish you were an audiobook. I guess that's what we are. A terrible, terrible audiobook.
We're in accurate narration, but somehow it's worth to be written in the first place. We're just
nonsense audio. So we meet the, the beer written in the first place. We're just nonsense audio.
So we meet the woman who made the captains that Kyle brought to Dubai.
She's there, Shahidah.
I think that's how you say Shahidah, Shahidah.
I was really hoping to be Eileen too.
What?
It's my favorite kind of pepper.
Shahidah.
Oh, Shahidah.
Oh, Shahidah.
But this is Shahidah.
Well, stop trying to take away my joy, Ben. Well, stop trying to make everything about your peppers.
Too late.
It's all about the peppers. So, Karyl, look at that. Take it in. Look at all those faux furs. It's like, how much of a percentage are you getting off your fucking nephews?
Oh, well, I guess a lot because you're selling them. Never mind. Take a back. Yeah, exactly. So the gods on Kyle's gods on Matt Serafas,
Harafah, whatever. He was on Project Runway Juniors
as some people pointed out and then Kyle pointed out
this episode. And he's so sweet.
He's like a 19 year old gay.
So he's like, he's like test driving all the gay freezes.
He's like, that is everything.
Ah.
Y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all,
everything, y'all, the top of the top of the top of y'all. Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, Yass, or she said, this is her life, it's called parodies.
I'm assuming it would be called that was funny. Well, I assumed it was spelled like,
P-A-R-A-D-I-S or something like that, like Vanessa Parody.
Either way, I somehow missed Matt interacting with Teddy,
but I can just imagine just being like,
everything who is the best. I'll be imagine just being like, everything who is.
I'll be saying everything. Yeah, it's basic.
He just gives Teddy a full on Miranda Priestly stare.
They get pictures with Kyle in a big red fur and Teddy in a floor
length green fur. It's just hideous and and he's wearing a little diamond
choker and a man bun pigtail thing or a man not bun pigtail I wrote and then
even in the still it looks like he's going he's yawzing. He's saying, yaw, it's with his eyes. He's meawzing.
Smiling and saying, yaw, it's with his eyes. So the other girls are in the van. They're
are going to, yeah, some party bus or whatever. They're arriving in Erica. Erica is talking
about her like the pathology of her fashion. I don't know if that's the right way to say
it. She's like, I like the league of others as a costume. I think about it not as an outfit, but as a personality.
I'm like, okay. All right. Where's James Lipton? Okay. Like inside the actors, he's like, I like
some half of the rules. I I become the Russian like a, I think it's my favorite looks. Some of my
favorite looks is Russian hooker from the 90s thank you thank you
for the
happy
yeah thank you thank you very much thank you question from the audience yes
you know that is an octopus on top of my head having six and a dumpster get it
everyone's like not laughing
Maybe I'm way around personality
I just love it. I don't know I just I'm like I don't know I'm not gonna go down that path I just feel like
Wouldn't you talk about my personality?
It was my general my office like only okay settle down well
Psych that's no I was telling you about on Netflix that I slogged through.
What a piece of shit.
Screw you, Netflix.
A screw you altered carbon for tricking me into watching that whole piece of crap.
But I watched that not whole thing.
It's like, I changed my sleeves.
That means I changed my body.
But my head is all with a little disc.
I could switch around.
It reminds me of Erica.
She's like, it's Erica giant, but different slave.
I'm like, he's still Erica Jane fast forward.
So at the store, a guest who shows up, the fat Jewish, he's there wearing overalls and
no shirt. It's like exactly what you want at your trunk's trunk show.
And the longest armpit hair I've ever seen on anybody. Okay. And Teddy just looks at him like,
longest armpit hair I've ever seen on anybody, okay? And Teddy just looks at him like
And then like Teddy is a huge fan of yours is like stop
What does she say to him oh I put double-man pig tail gold chain with star of David bad breath in parentheses. I'm assuming
background store pigs and holes while with no product. Oh, yeah pegs and holes She's like, hey, welcome. And she's got one of those like cross-dress for less things with the pegs to hang things on
And there's nothing on them. I was like, is this a joke? This isn't even a store. I
Know but Noah was thrilled for me was watching Bethany Frankel treat the fat Jewish like one of her
assistants because she bethany walks in and everyone didn't think she was gonna come because they thought
that she was gonna she was sick and in bed she's like she's like yeah yeah well you know I came
anyway I came anyway hi this is like to look to the fatures. Hi what's man I was going on like
what's what's happened like you think it away like where's the shirt like I would get it like
what's what's going on here like what the armpit here like I can tell you're like two other ones of
you like under your arms I don't get it that Like, what's going on here? Like, what the armpit here? Like, I can tell. Do you have like two other ones of you like under your arms?
I don't get it.
That fat Jewish, like, if you
not looked around, that's like half the city, like,
zerozy?
Like,
Also, she's such an asshole.
Bethany comes in.
And of course, every where she is invited to,
you know, she's like, I gotta say a man,
like I'm so busy, like, literally,
I like run the city.
I do so much stuff.
Like, my dad, like, say, I can't,
go to bed.
Who says that to their friend? He's like, I have a store opening tonight. It's so exciting and they're shooting it
She's like I got a I got a good a bad cow
Yeah, I mean Bethany this is this should be like your moment
You have none of your rivals there none of the New York Ramona is not there to undermine you
Durrind is not there to get drunk while you're trying to have an event Sony is not trying to take your your
Durvin just not there to get drunk while you're trying to have an event. Sonia's not trying to take your tipsy girl thing or the skinny girl thing for her for
seco.
Luann's not there trying to steal the spotlight and and remind everyone that you stole her
hair.
This is like your moment to shine.
You are like a predator with no predators.
You know, like you can just decimate the landscape right now.
It's all your prey and you can just populate,
but you're not doing it.
Well, all that she needed to hear was she was going to get a shot at Vanderpump
and her ass pin on some tote pants and got her ass on the subway.
Okay. Yeah. Yeah, that's true, which I was excited for.
I was excited for this big showdown.
So, yeah, so all the women are arriving.
It's air kisses, there's calf tans, etc.
And then we come back to Bethany grilling call about a ship six
Oh, well, where were you like Croatia was it nice was amazing good?
We on the sea huh we on the shore land go beach huh to go restaurant. It's a good. Uh-huh. What's matter? What's going on?
Like what's it? You have to go to the peninsula. Uh-huh. Just anything from Yugoslavia. Uh-huh
She's so bored with Kyle. Kyle likes. Oh my god. Look, it's not a haircut. It's tricks him and she goes, wow.
Wow.
Okay.
So he stole my haircut and buy extension the lands and buy extensions upon.
Get it?
Buy extension.
So Bethany is supposed to be meeting Teddy,
but she just turns her back to her and
Teddy is pinned up against like a store wall,
just looking all awkward.
And Bethany completely has her back.
Yes.
Bethany totally, she's like, what's Kristen Teckman doing here?
Huh?
Like she totally turns Teddy into Kristen Teckman.
And I kind of loved it.
Teddy was like, I actually was like really liking Teddy in the scene because she's just like,
what, where, where am I?
Like, when can I leave to go to sleep for soul cycle tomorrow?
I'm pledging my butt right now.
I'm pledging my butt like to the count of five right now. You can't see it.
Pretending I'm on a climb. I'm on a climb. I'm a comment.
So Kyle's like, look, this is Teddy and check. Oh, hello. Hi, hi, hello. Hi.
What is your view of you? What are the two of you? It's like the real housewives of two people, like seriously? Like where's everybody else?
It's the two of you. What is the fat Jewish party you show now? Like's a lot a lot that's a lot of hair I'm just saying I'm just
saying I'm just saying that for someone who's last name is Malin camp she doesn't like a big
melons you know what I'm saying it just doesn't look like she goes camping either I hate melons
I hate melons and I hate camp so sorry you guys musician okay that's cool yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah what's the matter what's gonna huh Cherry bomb like that song that your favorite song ever dad, huh? Do you hear me check and die in huh? No
So girls
Little houses, huh? Yeah, so the rest of the ladies arrive and founder posts like
Well, hello, Bethany and they double kiss and I was like, oh two queens, you know, do the yes the kisses
It's like quit. It's two queens of their franchises. It's like
quism is kissing fat cells. I felt like I was hearing Bolero in the background. Like, like,
like, tunt, tunt, tunt, tunt, tunt, tunt, tunt, tunt, tunt, tunt, tunt, tunt, tunt, tunt,
like they're sort of like circling, you know, about like, it's like a gentleman's,
or gentle lady's duel about to take place. Stupid cars, like, well, to read and
Vanderpump at least showed up, I mean, that's a good sign.
I don't even know if they were gonna come.
Shut up, Kyle.
Stop being such a victim now, Kyle.
Okay, of course they're gonna come.
What else are they gonna do?
Go to bed, dogs without you.
Ha!
And Eric is like,
a Zoy-A-M-O-Kiss-Kiss high high.
That man in the hood,
hello, Cubsin' head man.
Remember when I said that last year?
It was one of my about jokes of the year.
People never forget.
Remember my Hampton's look.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
It was.
It was a strong look.
It was.
It's only that I could appreciate that Bethley has a heart of gold
under there.
Just how I have a heart of a human under my Hampton look.
Thank you.
We got.
Thank you.
It was great.
Look, thank you.
The yourself sleeves. You self sleeves here.ves. The self-sleeves here.
So Kyle to Bethany is like,
oh God, the boat trip to Europe, Croatia, blah, blah, blah,
I'll fast forward through that.
Vanderpump scutes into the frame. Okay.
So Kyle and and stupid Bethany are talking behind them is one of those
standing bases full of those bombaistics for my Kia.
I was like, oh, come on, Kyle.
I mean, this is like some of the saddest shit I've ever seen. Cynthia Barely is like lurking. She's
like, ready to snatch one. Don't mind me. She just snatched it, and then when someone sees her,
she freezes up, like, she's a mannequin. It is the two-legged mannequin. She's like any calf,
tan. Ciao. I'm just a mannequin. Nothing to see here, Cha. This is the cheapest fucking thing.
Only Kyle could pull off something this fucking cheap.
So then they're talking and then Vanderpump just slides into the frame.
Yeah.
She's like, look at me.
I have a pink caftan.
I would never wear.
But it's pink.
Oh, God.
She's trying.
And then they don't pay attention to her.
So she goes, I love me.
And then Bethany, like, puts away her mints and closes up her purse and like brushes off
her wrists.
Like, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I mean, I have to my nend to
one man least.
Okay, I got it.
All right.
There's my dog whistle.
Um, uh, like this.
At least it's like, did you all have a lovely morning?
I had a wonderful, I was calling so many people.
It was like phone call after phone call after phone call. How is your morning, Kyle?
Girls, I didn't think you were showing up. I think being so late now. She's like,
where are you forced to do ret seen on me, Kyle?
I have to set up cameras for that crap. I didn't even let her sit down, all right.
And Kyle's like, I just wish you would reach out to me today because, you know, like,
we could have been having fun going to burglars. This is fashion, you know, so, um, you know,
this fuck you, Kyle, you forced Fanner Pump to do a private scene with Duret and then you
got mad that she was late.
This is so Kyle.
Yeah, so they started to like hash it out in front of Bethany and Kyle's like, well, I
mean, you let you, you thank me for defending you
And then you rode with the re oh my god Kyle do you hear these words?
You're a business woman and you're saying these words right in front of Bethany
I'm like you're so lucky that you have history with Bethany because otherwise you would have torn you apart right now
To read standing behind them taking like
She shots of the cheapest white wine available in plastic cups Kyle
She's she's grabbed like one of the, she's grabbed one of the bamboo sticks and
is like, we're telling you it's a microphone and singing fever into it.
And it's so awkward. And Bethany's like, let me, let me get to the point.
She fell stuck in the crossfire. The crossfire. You know what, you know what that is?
No, it is where there's a red blinking and it says stop. She's like, no, that's a crosswalk.
Crossfire, crossfire. How can I help out stuck in the crossfire? stop. Check. No, it's a crosswalk. Crossfire. Crossfire. That's how can I off out stuck in a crossfire?
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
When you went when you went on like,
like, you're you're thanks, right?
Then you like to the road was like,
that was, you know, that was the thank you,
thank you. Thank you.
Yeah.
I'm pretty like that.
Where's for?
Thank you.
Fuck you.
Get it.
It's like a thank you.
And then I thank you.
Is a pocket.
I was I thank you.
Yeah.
I think it's coming up with that one, Bethany,
but that's not that doesn't even make any fucking sense.
What you're saying and you weren't there. It's a shut up. And it was a pocket. Like what you did, what think it's coming up with that one Bethany, but that's not that doesn't even make any fucking sense What you're saying and you weren't there so shut up and I'll pack you fuck you like what you did
Well, you did Lisa was I thank you for it and Lisa's like oh god sake and she doesn't fall for it
She just smiles because she knows what's coming and then Kyle starts cracking up. She's like
Thank you fuck you. Yeah, that was a fuck you and they both bend over laughing and
My god and then it just turns to
Bethany and just you just stop don't look at me that way I see that look in your face
I know we're trying to do I'm still the queen
I just didn't want to read to go home alone
she tells us well now Kyle's got Bethany's to back up
I've got no problem going head to head with Bethany, but
So tired I had a solo scene with Zareet at a desk
And Beth and and so Bethany's like, oh, I couldn't let her go alone
She's a new city's the big girl, okay? What's the matter? What's going on? Like I don't get it?
I can take a cab taking over like I honestly like I like honestly coming now
If you're up to talk about the way to reach out home like just like coming out like honestly just like throw me into the cab I'll take the cab and just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm a skinny person to rest is suck you. Thank you. I mean, get it.
She goes suck you.
Thank you. I mean, get it.
So then another classic move, which I love there is three of them talking to Diamond, right?
And Bethany keeps trying to make all these snaps at Lisa.
And Lisa's not falling for any of them.
So Lisa turns her back to the camera
so that they can't get a three shot in,
which is so fucking smart of her.
And I love that she knows how to work it
because it kills the whole scene, you know?
So then to prove that what I'm saying is correct,
they have them move and then shoot them from behind.
Yes.
And Vanderpump still won't give it.
You go, bitch.
Well, I liked it because Bethany and Kyle just start band-turn really quickly. Because first Bethany thought to read was actually British. I'm not gonna tell you that I'm not gonna tell you that I'm not gonna tell you that I'm not gonna tell you that I'm not gonna tell you that I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that
I'm not gonna tell you that I'm not gonna tell you that I'm not gonna tell you that I'm not gonna tell you that I'm not that you like I'm sorry that you I'm sorry that you I'm sorry that you like you know You have a mental you something's going on with you. Oh my god Bethany. Oh my god Bethany Kyle Bethany
I don't know what's like going super fast and Lisa's like on the side trying to say something she's like
Yeah, oh, yes, what funny broken bit no no now's the time fuck you no no no
Well, Bethany's just so coked out of her fucking mind. She doesn't even know what she's saying
I had to rewind it three times. I couldn't even understand a word she was saying.
It was just like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Kyle's bent over laughing.
They're totally coming for Vanderpump.
And Vanderpump doesn't even understand it.
And so she goes again, she goes,
oh, you, I know what you're doing.
And Bethany goes, don't tell me what I'm doing.
Huh?
Don't tell me what I'm doing.
Meh, Meh, Meh.
I don't mind, bad, I don't mind.
La, la, la, la, la, I like, I like, I like, what?
What? What the fucking talking about? What's wrong with you?
So then we go over to Rina who has found some sort of like big crazy jacket. It's like a greeno.
It's like a big, it's a big sort of like fabulous jacket and she's like, I love it. I would be crazy if I got this right now.
Everyone's like, let us just let us sit there.
When it cuts back to the the fight or Bethany just looking like a fucking idiot on TV as normal.
I don't like this is my town, honey. Don't call me a liar.
And then Kyle and Vanderpump go, wow. And then stand next to each other.
And then Vanderpump just looks down at her glass of cheap ass white wine in a plastic cup. And
it was like the best thing that happened. I didn't think you'd be better than like crazy. I thought
she's, I thought Beth knew it was just being Beth and I was, I was, she looked fucking nuts. Like,
you're coming. I've said it already. I don't need to repeat it. You know what I thought was funny is that they cut to Erica and she was wearing, I don't
know if this was her outfit for the night or if she had changed into something of the
store, but she was wearing something that was like a black button down shirt, like tucked
into black pants.
And like the combination of the shirt and the pants and then her like her hair piece that
was giving her bangs made her look like a cater waiter.
And I was like, oh, for Erica, I hope she realizes
she looks like the caterer right now.
But what I was going for with my outfit was,
I want to go to be a caterer.
She was like on the other side.
I almost like to be like,
making a blanket, so.
Look for the sack being Eric and Jane.
Everybody wants something from there.
Why not?
I've been using mine.
And so, yeah, I wanted it to be like that episode I never but it won't something from there. Why? I know I love being so mine.
And so, yeah, I wanted it to be like that episode of a rest of development where everyone thinks Job works at the club and so he's like delivering club sauce to everyone and drinks.
As I wanted Erick had to be commissioned into work.
Oh, all right, I guess I can get you a white one.
I know. They gave me a tray of past orders. I guess I'll pass these around white one. Um, if they gave me a tray of past or herbs, I guess I'll pass these around.
Okay, I'm a good one, fuck.
I'm a good one, fuck. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah say I'm sorry, just say I'm sorry. It's just, I'm sorry if you were upset and they both go,
what?
They both call her out and she goes, oh yeah, yeah,
you're sorry that we perceived it that way.
And she's like, and Karol goes, what about just,
I'm really sorry, okay?
And Vandipop goes, it's your event.
I'm not fighting.
I'm just taking notes for my grudges later this year.
Meanwhile, Rin is still trying on first in the back and Matthew's like, Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes Lisa trying to get, like, she's trying to, like, she's trying on this red jacket
and then I think she's putting on someone else.
And everyone in the store, I don't know if you noticed,
that all these girls or in the store have just, like,
lined up and are just taking Instagram photos
or, like, Snapchat.
And the poor producer, you can see the show producer,
one of the Beverly Hills producers,
is just trying to get them to move away.
You can see that this R is being like,
come on, can you, like like try to look natural right now?
He was like a wall of like of like these like 23 year old girls just like
staring taking pictures at Lisa Vanderpump. Well, it's mean he would say this is
all Twitter people. Yeah. Everybody here is Twitter people. I was so jealous. I
wanted to be there too. And I love the Vanderpromp's buying that
hideous faux fur. It's fucking ugly as fuck. And she tells the lady at the cash out, she's like,
I'm buying this at full price.
So they can't add cheap skate to the list of insults I've endured tonight.
Just scaredy.
I love she that's like her own thing.
I've endured so many insults.
What about me?
I'm buying this for myself after all the time.
Um, so who's Erica talking to you?
Definitely.
Bethany is talking to her.
I wrote Ben and Erica talk.
That's like, oh my God.
Ben was there.
That little asshole.
He never tells anything.
Uh, it's like, and so then I walked in and I was like, Erica, what's up?
She's like, well, I didn't make another meal podcast.
No, it's all in good fun.
We really love you.
But like, we just poke at things because this is what we
think about when we watch these shows. She's like okay you want to take a picture. Yeah but
I'd like to get to know you too. Bye. That would be my scene with her. Well then you
leave and Bethany comes up and Bethany's like hey hey what are you doing? You find a brand
yet? And Erica's like oh you know right in the book making music. She's a book. So you're saying about what she is myself about philosophy.
Okay.
Nothing's like, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh.
That's just like, they show the clip of Bethany beating her in the haptons and going, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, I saw you video.
Yeah, it's too slow. It's cheap. It's like trying to be avant garde something.
If I were Brian Moilin, I'd be terrified
because you know, the first book reviews
could be from Bethany.
Yeah, I read your book.
And I'm still super fish.
I don't like that.
I didn't get it.
I was like off cursing.
There's a lot of like, okay, I was born like tough childhood.
Like what else is there?
Like honestly, like, yeah,
will you raise it a track?
You're a reason Georgia.
That's not like, like, so like what's the big deal?
I don't get it.
Like did you see your mom get dreaded?
That's what I don't know. I don't know. It seems so much like did you see your mom get dreaded? Well, I don't I don't know. It's like then seems so much me not 16 heartwarming. I got it like right my own like who's that
Having a little
Try to hold it we're ready. Oh, it was funny. So Rin and Kyle
When it's like how was everything
How was it Kyle how was everything Kyle Kyle come here. How are you?
How was everything
How are you
How are you
I was just outside me Ali. Do you know how many rats there are out there? I'm gonna blow up an empire
I love this store. It's clearly going to be around for five to seven months.
So Kyle is just complaining to him. She's like, it's great. It's like,
I just sort of sucks. There's like a black cloud hanging over me during
Fashion Week. And it's just, you know, it's a black cloud with this whole
stuff at least. And when I was like, I know it was a shame. Like, it's not really
that big of a shit. Like, or she could have just gone over and still enjoyed
herself. But like, it's a shame. shame like no one died. Yeah and also boiled again.
Foyled again, Rina because Rina is like, oh, Vanderpump trouble with Vanderpump.
I support that. It's about time. Why can't Vanderpump ask now? Go enjoy the party.
Woo.
Just slap on the ass. No. I just love I just love Rina's like excessive empathy. I know it's a shame. It's a shame.
I love that about her. Cut to Doreet still wandering around talking to nobody
trying on the goat their van der pump just bought and left at the counter. Yes, she's literally
just wearing it. She's like, give me feedback Kyle. Kyle. And so now Kyle and Doree start to talk and Kyle saying that she was hurt because she
put a lot of trust into Doree and like Doree's like one of her new best friends and like,
I don't know, it's just like it hurts.
And Doree's like, Kyle, what are the best things to come out of this group with my friendship
with you?
And I never want to hurt that.
Never.
Even though you talk so much crap about Lisa Vanderpum.
Wait, what? Oh, there you go again, Kyle. want to hear that never even though you talk so much crap about Lisa van der Pum.
Wait what? Oh there you go again Kyle you really should stop it.
The thing about this group is you call and Lisa.
Mostly Lisa. Because they're so shallow and I love every one of you. Van der Pals. Van derrance paying if she goes, do you want anything, Erica?
Cosmila, remember that time, Erica bought her some moisture,
as her.
You see, Vanderbilt always come back.
She's like, would you like anything?
They don't sell moisturizers, but they do have tacky, whole coats.
If you'd like one, get you back.
You scratch my whole back, all scratchers.
And then Kyle and Dorita are still trying to bury the hatch schedules. And then, um,
Kyle and Dorita are still
trying to bury the hatchet
and Kyle is once again doing
the whole, it's just, it's
just, we could, it's
fashion week. We could have
been laughing and having the
best time. And so we weren't.
I'm like, Kyle, get over
yourself. It was all of 18
hours. Okay. You like you had
like an okay day. Sorry.
Whatever happened to baby
Jane all this time. We could
have been friends
And so Kyla and Dorit finally they bury the hatchet they say they remind each other how much they love each other But then Dorit said Dorit I think she tells us goes was she she tried to drive a wedge between one of my very very very
Very good friends. I'm like she didn't try to drive a wedge
You are the one driving the wedge you are all hundred percent doing it. They have a friendship of 10 years
It's like, it's so obvious what she's trying to do,
but like the fact that she's so slick
in the way she's able to turn around.
But she's so dumb.
I don't even know if that's what she means.
Like, it's a derit, so she may have just met like,
literally, she was trying to drive a wedge.
Have you ever seen someone try to drive a shoe?
A third, oh day I went to go.
I went to try to buy a wedge that you can drive and I just got terrified.
Did you see what happened when I went to go buy a wedge?
Yeah.
Oh, you.
Oh, Vander from, uh, okay. Oh
Vanderfump Okay, so Kyle again is like bye guys. Thanks so much for coming. I didn't think you'd show up because you were said like it's like okay Kyle
Shut up already Kyle. I've had it with you. Okay. I'm giving you enough this season shut the fuck up already
I'm glad your shortlist so she's like did you oh, sorry. I was just gonna slip into this,
but I got Carl ready to game.
So Vanderpump goes, sometimes it's exhausting
trying to understand other people's relationships.
Like you're the head of Vanderpump rules.
Yeah, but when you're British, it's hard.
It's like, what?
I have to actually have empathy right now instead of just cold British witch.
And then actually, it's being cold. I love when Bethany was leaving the party because she
gives, she goes up to Teddy. She's like, nice to meet you. And she gives like bet like,
she gives Teddy like a little handshake. And then she hugs and kisses every single other person.
I was like, oh man. That is so Bethany.
It's totally boxing out.
Teddy totally.
Chris and Jake, manning her 100% that she is.
Bethany's a horrible fucking human being.
She's not a nice person at all.
I love her and I'm glad she's on housewives.
But God, what a bitch.
Well, she would probably do this whole thing of like, well, I mean, I don't know.
I just like met her tonight.
So let's get started on the cheek like I barely know her.
Like she's like John Cougar Malacham stutter.
Like guess what?
I'm you call me? I'm I'm I'm Tom Tom Tom Puma orange
pop starter I got how you know huh you like that like that joke fighter gave me that one
I couldn't read it was in Swedish it was like crazy. Oh yeah and double fuck her for that
show. Okay. I like that. I actually I love Bethany, even though she can be like really annoying, I really love Bethany,
but triple fuck her for that show.
Yes.
And Frederick too.
So back at LAX, Kyle, oh, wait, back in LA, Kyle's over it.
Paul, I do like office.
I do like that. Paul
nasip is doing skin stuff at LAX. He's like now, but he was to like a place next
to the foe taco truck and the American Airlines term and all that.
The exchange. He's like right next to Hudson news and breast
them. Five minute face lift. And he's doing something on
her neck. And she's like, what else do you want to do pop?
What else? He's like, you don't need much. And that's Paul's nice way of saying, look, age, I stopped at age room.
Okay. I'll exfoliate you, but look, that's like a walking billboard, I guess, my company. Okay. Yeah.
Yeah, exactly. And we see you toet at the intercussion. She's like, Chagi, Chagi, you want to go to the park?
And he's like, I want my gummy bears.
He's like, has like a mini tan room.
And she's like, look, Chagi, gummy bears.
And then he actually like becomes very sweet
and kisses her on the cheek.
I was like, aww.
Thank you very much.
And she gets to kiss her.
I'm the only person that can understand Chaga.
No, those are actual words that you're speaking now.
Dory, you fucking moron.
So, Rina and Harry got a dog and Rina's like,
what the fuck?
What the fuck?
What the fuck?
What the fuck?
What the fuck? Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh wuh Why is that so funny? Because Lisa is like, please, be my pink floating flamingo in the pool.
I need something to get me to his rest of the season.
My little teddy bear come here.
How are you?
I'm under construction here.
That table is for 25 friends.
If I even have that million in my life, then it's anywhere.
This is the rest of my arc for the rest of the season. Building a table,
check in next week to see how it's coming along. There may be a varnish. Who knows?
Rosio. Check guess. Tee-piece. She's like, yeah, no shit, lady, Jesus Christ. Can I get a fucking
that? By the way, way, for anyone who wants,
people have been tweeting at us
that we've been saying, it's Rocio, not Rocio.
So I just want to cheer, your voices have been heard,
but sometimes we get caught up in it.
And we go, yes, yeah.
Yeah.
I'm Teddy.
You're really fucking with me, David.
So if I am, I'm taking all the user input
I'm like I've heard it. I've heard the feedback
processing it
Turn it into something and that's that's the way
But I know that that's where the accent is placed. I'm from El Paso, Texas. Okay. I wasn't just born at the ready
Okay, but doesn't she say Rosio?
Isn't that how she actually says it? I think she says Rosio. Oh, well, then just fuck me and my brain. I quit. This is where the
Vanderpump impersonation breaks on ratio.
ratio.
But
Hazel darling, can I get some tea please? Rosie darling. Okay, Mr. Jetson.
Get you some tea right away. Okay. Is that better Twitter?
Roku. Roku.
So she's like, are you coming to my birthday? Bring that handsome little monster husband of yours.
I love that day of the dead husband of yours. I saw he did such great work in Coco.
the dead husband of yours. I saw he did such great work in Coco. Or as Rocio calls it. Coco. Or as people on Twitter and this pronounced. Like Kaylee. Oh my god. So she's just taking
I'm just involving a lot of Twitter and input today. That's all. Yeah. It's okay. You could
just say it to me. If you need to, You don't need to hide behind a Twitter follower.
No, I am hiding behind. I want them to feel like you'll say that I'm doing an Andy, I'm doing an Andy Cohen style.
Angela from Rancho Cucamanga says, why do you say, Rocio, like Rocio and not Rocio?
If that is the one thing that you guys can throw at me on Twitter,
then throw it. Give me those accent marks.
I'm just kidding. Okay. I'll try and remember guys. I'll try and remember.
I don't care. You can say, Rocio. I don't really care.
You know what I care about getting through this scene.
Not going to allow you. Not going to allow you.
There's a new table. Stop laughing. Oh my god. I'm going to cough. Stop laughing. Okay, let's say some,
let's talk. Let's, let's make you not laugh. Okay. Teddy. Teddy. See, you're not laughing. See?
So they started to go to sleep. Teddy. So they start rehashing as Roscio brings the tea. They start rehashing the trip to New York City and all this stuff.
And Teddy's like, you know, I think the problem with the read is that she just never
owns up to what she says.
Like, you know, at this point, I've spent a lot of time with both women and like I've never
heard cost be guilty of anyone.
And he's like, she never has.
I'm like, it's Calvary George.
She's definitely spoken ill.
Yeah, she just has Bethany to it for her. Andany goes she could but she could put thought into a words to read
But you know when your friends you make allowances and Teddy's like hard never gotten allowance, you know
I worked for every damn dollar like yeah, I paid for the Uber up here
No, no, and so Teddy is so Teddy bass is like, you know,
well, she's like, I've never heard calls to anything bad.
And, you know, at least it's like,
and Dary does.
At least that you even watch last season.
The entire arc, but Dary was that she talked shit
about Erica the entire time about her panty
and a pretty little bus.
So Teddy's like blah blah blah blah
many pumps like oh thank you for coming Teddy back can't even keep my eyes open.
Rassio please clear. I can borrow your horse right? Yes. Yeah at least is saying how she's
like I just didn't want to eat to go home alone and then to have to explain it to PK. I'm
like you would not have had to explain to PK that you didn't get under a ticab with his dingbat wife.
Okay, like please.
Oh, also Teddy's, you know, going on
about her feelings about the whole things.
And she goes, you know, it's like,
maybe people just need you need to hear you say officially.
I'm sorry.
And then they close up on Vanderpump's face and she just goes,
hmm.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh. Oh.
Rocia, what did you put in this tea?
It's disgusting.
Oh, it's just Teddy.
It's the presence of Teddy.
I mean, I liked, I mean, I liked Teddy.
She, she rides horses just like I do.
I mean, I could never ride a horse.
It's what it is she can.
I could never.
But anyway, and she's like, maybe Teddy is right. Maybe I do have to Apollo.
Apollo, what's that word? Who said Apollo? Oh, no, I love it.
Concentrate Lisa.
Apollo again.
That time.
Okay. So now that's Harry Hamilton, the puppy being like, well, we have a puppy when I was in
Berkeley, I never had a puppy, but I have a puppy known FF.
Okay, so Delilah calls FaceTime and she's like, my best friend, which was cute.
I love that when Delilah calls Rina while Rina is doing her interview moment, even then,
Rina is like, I'm not going to give anyone a low-angle baby.
She like holds the phone all the way out and she's looking directly into it and posing.
She's got her chin a little bit forward, down into the right, which is what you're supposed
to do.
She's like, baby, we may be face-saving.
I may be face-saving just to my daughter, but I'm going to get my angles every time.
Okay, baby, I own it.
Okay, get past her my angles every time. Okay, baby, I own it. Okay, get us all the answers, Angles, baby.
When she hangs up with her, she's like,
I love that kid.
And here he goes, yeah, we need to help them.
It's like fish who grows up, it's like fish.
They grow up in water, you know?
They don't know what water is at first.
And it's like, uh, that analogy.
And he goes, I could have gone with Plato's cave Lisa.
Apparently, there's issues because D'Alyla is really homesick and they don't know if she's
going to like go to NYU because she's so homesick and she used to have panic attacks and she
used to be bullied, which I'm surprised that she was bullied.
And Harry Hamlin's like, I get it.
I mean, when I, when I was going
to Berkeley, I used to cry myself to sleep every night. I'm just like imagining Harry
Hamlin crying at Berkeley all alone.
Well, yeah, not mind. I feel so sorry for you gorgeous rich people. I mean, yeah, he was,
he was hot. Wait a second. He was like out like doing beer bongs with like topless chicks
in Berkeley the entire time. We all know it, Harry. Yeah, he was crying from all the intense puse say he was getting, okay?
He's like, I can't believe this is happening, Tommy.
So over at Villa Blanca,
Vanderpump comes in and she's wearing black and white.
So we don't know what side she's going to be on.
I look like one of those New York cookies.
I learned it from the trip to New York. She's like, I'll
sit over there, hostie host host. I'll be expecting Kyle. I expect Kyle to explain why she
tried to trick me to disobeying the golden hand at the crossbow. So then why did Kyle
say, what's the matter jealous because of her?
Yo, because okay, so Kyle walked in and she's like holding like a new handbag.
She's like,
I called it as Kyle does.
It's like Erica's personality, but in the handbag.
Yeah, so Lisa goes, you need to go to handbags anonymous.
And then she looks and then she goes to Kyle.
So when did you get this?
Did it puppy?
I'm like, um, you need to go to dogs anonymous because now you're calling the handbags, puppies.
Also anonymous bags that look really nice are what Doreet wears around. Okay, those are called Chinatown knockoffs. So, Kras, like, I'm extremely
overwhelmed Lisa. Okay. Um, I'll take some Fenderpepper.
I'll say. I'm just goes, because why would you give that to me in a water glass? Who
do you think I am? Doreet, which made me laugh out loud.
I feel like actually, secretly Kyle, I feel like she sort of has our sense of humor.
She doesn't show it on the show very much, but every time she actually makes a joke,
it's exactly like ours.
She's celebrities.
They're just like us.
Exactly like us.
Me and Kyle, maybe not.
Very similar. I'm it. Exactly like us. Me and Kaya. Maybe not.
But very similar.
I'm it.
Well, I've always said on this show, I feel like Kaya,
I would get along with the best in real life.
She just makes me nuts on the show because she's always
flashing her money in her fucking bags and her brands
and this and that.
And she's so sneaky behind everyone's back.
I feel like in real life, we have fun talking
shift together.
Yeah, but you know, I feel like in real life, the three of us
would like get together and like just hang out and drink wine.
And she talk about how she's like,
oh my god, I totally put my thing on there.
So we get on TV.
I feel like she, I feel like behind closed doors,
she's like totally up front about her sneakiness.
She's like, oh yeah, no, like I totally was like,
wait, it's not sneaky.
It's not sneaky.
It's subtle, it's just so coiled, it's a coiled voice.
Coiled?
So now they have their big talk and
Vanderpromps like well, I felt like I was in New York a whole week to a certain emotional
Hey, with what I had to endure
Not cheap skate you couldn't call me that but everything else I endured. Oh, Doreet. There's so much at stake
With my relationship with pk. I'm like don't say steak be gay in the same sentence. He'll be taking the bus over here. And then Kyle's like, well, is anything at stake with
me Kyle at least is like, yeah, yeah, you hold me the higher
standards Lisa like to read that stuff, then I know you'd be
mad at me, but you don't get mad at her. And she's like, do
want to see my deep wounds?
I'm glad we're having this meal indoors get it indoor
I've endured so much bleeding wounds
Vanderpombs basically like oh cuz she's like you hold me in higher and standers Lisa and Brinne can say oh no No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
And then you're like Mary Poppins in Van and Promo's like,
oh, now it's about to break accents.
Well, no, because no, you got a little mix up there
because Kyle is saying, you hold me to a higher standard
and so Lisa turns around and is like, what?
You hold me to a higher standard.
Rinne could say anything and Kyle, you'll be fine
with it, but if I said one thing,
who would never be at the end of it.
Oh, okay, thank you. She of it? So she turned it on.
She turned it on Kyle basically saying you did the same thing.
And then that's when Kyle was like,
but you're always like,
and that's when Lisa's like,
why do you take the piss out of my accent?
I don't go, Rammamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamam I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, is exactly like you are. And it's amazing. Never change it.
My lips are bad.
So Lisa basically says,
listen, the reason why I get more angry
is because I'm closer with you Kyle.
So it means more.
If you speak shit about me,
which Kyle should have heard as,
I know you better.
I like you better.
So when you talk shit,
it means more than when stupid to read says something, but Kyle doesn't know that
Yeah, well they make up though at least they're like
And they give each other dirty look and see if they'll be friends
Lisa starts to do like a little you get lost in your nose that I get that I get you lost in your notes
Yeah, I'm lost, but I know we're at the end. So I'm just writing with it
So at least so Lisa at least as basically,
she tries to do like a little bit of a sitcom moment,
like the, you know, where you start to hear
the music playing at the end of Perfect Strangers,
she's like, you know, we've been friends for,
you know, I'm close with you, you know,
something about 10, you know, 10 years of hard work
and labor and aggregation and a little bit of love,
Kyle.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So she thinks that that's going to solve, but Kyle's still like mad so Kyle goes I can only take so much, you know, so Lisa's like
Okay, here we go. Let me get my index cards out
Kyle I am sorry. This is genuine Kyle. This is genuine
Very genuine
Kyle I grew up riding was oh, no, no, no, that was Teddy's
Who don't know?
I
Want to apologize a thousand times she sorry you felt reverted in New York and she had no idea you fell it
idea you fell it. Yeah, and Kyle's like, oh my God, let's make up.
And that is why I was upset with you in New York.
This is like, poor, poor Eileen, if only Teddy were around to
coach Lisa to apologize for Eileen, that whole season could
have been saved for Eileen.
Oh no, Eileen fucked herself.
Yeah.
And they fucked herself by doing nothing and then trying to go up
against somebody in such a sneaky way and
Then trying to get us to talk about Erica's goddamn underwear for an entire year
Well, I liked I mean I still really liked I mean a lot and I like to run the show and I'm so excited that she's not there anymore
But anyway, so Lisa and Kyle give they they clink glasses and give each other fuck you glairs and at least is like you act in like snow
Like right now just so you know and cause like I can't tell if that's at least it's like, you act like snow white right now. Just so you know, and Kyle's like,
I can't help but it's a compliment to her bar,
but I'll just laugh.
I know, enjoy this Apple TV.
It's in a mirror, my TV glass.
There's a reason Snow White got what was coming to a girl.
Hey, remember, I just remembered on the live show last week when we talked about Lisa walking into Villa Blanca and saying,
I think I've gone back in time. I said, yeah, that's the way everyone feels when they walk into your restaurant.
The entire audience went, oh, they were so mad. Like that was below the belt making fun of Lisa's decor.
That was so fun. I totally forgot about that.
I know they're like, how dare you make fun of the 80s.
Ronnie, you sound like you're going to die. So why don't you go get some rest. Let's wrap this up. Everyone, thank you so much for, for listening. I'm like coming to the show. Thank you so much for listening. Go to watchrocrapins.com to buy your tickets. And remember, we forgot to mention this earlier this week,
but we totally forgot.
We're going to do costume contest at the show.
So if you're coming to Houston and at Orde Troy Show
or Irvine show, come in your greatest.
It doesn't have to even be a costume.
You've seen the cool t-shirts on our Instagram, things like that.
Whatever you want to dress up, we're going to create a hashtag
and we're going to check out those photos,
pre-show, and then we'll announce the winners on stage.
It's going to be super fun.
So use your creativity and we'll have fun,
giveaways and stuff.
Oh, Ronnie, go get some sleep guys.
What a fun day.
We will talk to you guys next time.
Bye, everyone.
Bye. Hey Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download
the Amazon Music app today.
Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts
before you go tell us about yourself
by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.