Watch What Crappens - RHOBH: Horsing Around

Episode Date: January 4, 2018

Did you guys know that Teddi loves horses? Because she does. A lot. And this week we get to see her ride a horse. So, that's cool. Come listen to our recap of this exciting equestrian moment as well as some daddy issues from Erika and a birthday party for Dorit. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few, follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what happens would like to think it's premium sponsor! Can't have a burger without Megan Berg, Kelly Barlow, when she goes Barlow, we go HIGHLOW.

And Kristi Dauri, the OG Prem Supreme. Plus our super premium sponsors, Grant the grant master and Lizzy Drucker a fine mother fuck to talk to other crap and listeners about the shows as they air, come over to facebook.com slash Watch What Crappens. Hey everyone, welcome to Watch What Crappens, a podcast about all that crap up Bravo that we just love to watch. I'm Ben Mandelker from BSIBLOG.com and the Bander Blender podcast and joining me in this first week of the new year is my lovely wonderful friend who may or may not have grown up riding horses I guess we'll find out. It's Ronnie Carham from trashtalktv.com as well as the Rose Pricks Bachelor podcast. What's up Ronnie?

I love horses. That's what I do. I ride horses. I love them. I literally love riding horses. That girl is killing me and not in a good way. It's not like, Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of Forces. Little League of . Little League to tell people to buy tickets to our show in Boston, January 18th, buy those tickets, you buy it better, buy them tickets. We have their VIP tickets available and regular ones. This is our second show, because our first show was sold out. So if you missed it, guess what?

Show's still available. Go to watchacrapans.com to buy those tickets as well as any merchandise you might like. Ronnie has been doing a great job keeping the coffers full of cousin Janice cousin Janice really some of the other sister sister oh yes you'll meet her at many live shows working the much table beautifully yeah also I wanted to announce that Rose Pricks the

Bachelor podcast is back we're doing our we released our first episode of the new season today so go listen to. There's also a cast breakdown posted already. So come on over, y'all. Come on over or go on over. So got how fun it was to talk about the dumb hose of the bachelor. I'm so glad to have it back. And Ari, Ari Lundick, the most boring bachelor ever. Come on by everybody everybody. Oh geez. Yeah, that's I'm trying to start I am actually in the process of starting Perhaps another podcast about board games. So it says nothing to do with Bravo But you know me. I'm obsessed with board games. I've been staring at this one game

It's called pulsar 28 49 or something. I mean so doorky. It's actually embarrassing how doorky it is But I'm just like staring at it online, salivating like, do I buy it? Do I not? You know going in and out of the Amazon cart? The whole ritual. So yeah, I do that to you. I do save for later and then I go back and I'm like, God, I'm glad I didn't buy that. What the hell was I thinking? I've still got like a monitor arm in my bag. I'm like, what are you doing with this? But I can't press delete. Yeah, I have some really random stuff in my cart. What are you doing with this? But I can't press delete. Yeah, I have some really random stuff in my cart. So I'm doing that with some of my board, some of the fellow gay board gamers that I play with. I'll let everyone know if it actually

happens and if it actually sounds any good, as long as it doesn't sound like for extremely dorky guys talking about things. Then I will let the crap in. Sounds good to me. Sounds good to me. Do it. Yeah, we'll see. We'll see how it turns out. We'll see. Well, we missed last week's real housewives of Beverly Hills because we were on VK. Now, we watched it, but we didn't recap it, obviously. So we're not going to do both recaps. Right. No, I definitely did not take's an I barely remember it. I know there was a Ferris wheel. I know that like the whole thing was like, oh no Lisa, Lisa Renners coming back with the group. How will she be with Dorit? And Lisa, Lisa Renners like, hello,

Dorit. Hi. Hello. Hi, Dorit. So good to see you. Wow. So good to see you. Wow. Wow. Wow. That's how that episode ended with her like hello. Hello. Hello. Hi. Hi. Are you hitting me? Hi. I'm a good person. Hi. I own it, baby. I'm a good person. I just want you to see That as we tower over the stratosphere of Las Vegas. I'm a good person to read. I am And it was also the episode where Erica told us She brought up her daddy issues at a drink Events they were sitting right having drinks and

Teddy at a drink. Yeah. They were sitting around having drinks and Teddy was talking about her famous dad, John Melanchamp. And she's like, well, or John Cougar Melanchamp, haught me. And she's like, you know, it's like, he was just my dad. Like to me, he was just some guy with huge lips and, you know, a job, like what the fuck do I care? I mean, do you really care that much about your dad? She said something like that in America's Oh, I didn't know him. And then everybody got super sad. And she's like, I didn't know my dad. I met it two times. He still meant from my parts, whatever.

And it was like this super sad story. And she goes, I think it's weak when people say, Oh, she's got daddy issues. She married, she married to dad. Well, my husband is well, to the my dad so fuck you pretty much and then I think that's pretty much all that happened anything that was no worthy you know and Dorit's Dorit's boobs are really making their presence known this season did she get like a boob job I'm like Cohen, but like the reason why I ask is because her boobs seem to be very large and very on screen. Yeah, it's a lot. It's like when people get a new car and you're like, you're just

driving around the block now. Look at it. I get it. Okay, you still have to park on the other side of the street for street sweeping, just like everybody else. Yeah, yeah. Super face. So, Doreet moderation. Oh, I think I've already said this, but I'd love that her opening line is, I'm all about moderation. And she's kissing PK. He's like, it's all about, I'm all about excess except for moderation. Oh, I talked, yeah, it's like a, it's a total mobio strip of logic, which I kind of love. Which is so Doreet, I was drinking from a Starbucks cup, but it's only water. Look, it's also so Dary. PK guys, there's water in my Starbucks cup, guys. Boys, boys.

It is poor acid to read because you know she's that person who goes in the Starbucks. She's like, I've left my rose rose outside Can I have a cup of water please like a bottle of water? No in a cup. Here's what I would like. Here's what I would like I would like an iced coffee But hold the coffee beans hold the grains so it's really just a cup of water with ice. That's what I would like Can you do that for me? My mother was a great coffee maker, just great. She would make coffee every day and she would say, here's some coffee, but with ethnic grounds, with

after beans, just wonderful guys, you have to try my mother's coffee, okay? Okay, I'm from such a magical place. You would turn on the faucet and coffee would come out. Gosh. How much we loved coffee? Gosh. Have you had my mother's tea? She would, she basically just special way. It was tea, a tea bag, water, lemon and honey.

Hold the honey, hold the lemon, hold the tea bag. It was delicious. I'm holding the tea bag, I'm very tall. Fuck you. Guys, Eric and I are getting along. We both work crazy out at Fgerald Vegas and never friends. They are so poor and it's so funny to watch them front, okay? Because last week she's like, I'm going to Vegas, be care!

And he's like, well, you should do some shopping, babe. You should do some shopping, Bubba. So how much do my lad to spend, be care? And he's like, not more than a million dollars. I'm sure. Yeah, shut up. So, Capital One card, did you steal? So, this episode opens up with like flashes of what the different women are doing, and they are some really random flashes this week. Like the very first one is Erica being like, do you got prison letters?

Oh, I got letters from prison. Yeah, I get let out. So the Erica Jane prison club. That sounds like a line of mystery books. And then I saw them all with my pussy. Yeah, she also said this in her interview with Brian Moilin. He's like, do you get prison letters? She's like, yeah, do. Which he's kind of getting her set together, basically, Brian Moylan, because we heard a lot of the same stuff from this episode in that interview. Like it was the first time she'd ever set it.

What is this your stand-up set? What are you just going to work on this for a season before you make the material public? Then we have Ken. He's like, oh, I want another gig. I want one of the gigas. can he's like oh another G Want a clone can his a yes, oh there's life in him yet can He's not a broken bird. He's a lively bird with wings that need to be set free Dogs die young, but dogs were sweaters live forever

And then we go to Lisaifer and I was like, hi cleaning lady, hi, hi, what's going on? There's a rat poop in the oven. Oh again. I was like what? Listen, Rat, if I'm going to continue managing you, you are going to need to learn where to poop. I swear to God, the life of a Bradager is never done Listen, I respect the rat. He hustles. He gets in. He gets his food

He poops in my oven, but he lives and he does well for himself Hey, rat. Guess who doesn't poop in in sinks Chuckie cheese, okay? Aim higher rat aim higher So then we right what did you Jesus a rat? He was a mouse. Thank you. I don't know. I don't know if that was that was rodentism. That was very ignorant rodentism. It really was. Spotted out. So then we we land on Doreet who's got like her head inside of what looks like an oven But it's really her closet rack and she's like no, because PK walks in the room she's like,

oh no, I was hoping, I was kind of hoping you wouldn't come in while I was ranging my sunglasses PK. You know I like to arrange for sunglasses PK. I like to do it in private, privacy to PK. And PK, it looks great babe. Now tell me about Vegas. And she's all connected with Erika!

If she was like a new phone, I just had to call T-Mobile. And get her hooked up, turns out all she needed this entire time with the Sim card! It turns out we both love to organise our sunglasses that we get for free at Bar Mitzvahs. Look, this one was from a little Jewish boy that lived down the street. Look, it looks like Darth Vader. Hey, there's no boy George, then he's not important. So if he is like, well that's interesting news, is it? Okay. How are you with Rina? Because it's your birthday Friday and I need to decide who to invite. It's like, oh yeah, everyone's just dying to go to your fucking free birthday party at Villa Blanca PK. You pour a son of a bitch. Yeah exactly. So this

is Will to re invite Rina and Rina's and Doreet's like well we had a very lovely talk on a Ferris wheel and it was just guys I think everyone appreciates that, you know, we're just gonna try to wipe the slate clean and try to start a new. So yeah, I think, I think then yes, we should invite Rene's like, well, it wouldn't be nice to invite Erica Giant and not Rene us, so let's do it. I'm like, or producers told you to invite her or so. Yes, and she's like, all right, PK, but I'm telling you this. I have a precaution. Yeah, like you're so stupid. Like you're literally too stupid to live. And I also like Teddy's kids are just all smumping the bad.

They only show Teddy, Teddy, that's so rude. Teddy. Because she talks about her weight issues later. I did not do that on purpose. But she's talking to her kids and like, I'm just like that they're bored too. Yeah, well, all she talks about are horses and children. So I was like,

UGH! The last thing I need to see is that the actual horse is amoea actual children. And of course I get both. It's like the nightmare flight from hell. A horse and children. Yeah. So, we then go to Kyle's house where there's hammering and Kyle's like, hey Mauricio, do you want your agency hat now or your agency hat later?

He's like, hey babe, I can't deal with you right now. It's over the hammering. I can't deal with you. I love that he's always like a bad actor, Ricky. He's like, oh, I can't hear you with all the hammering. Okay, you got your lineup, Mori. Yeah. Did you try this with a little more emotion next time?

I'm having some agency brand oatmeal and some agency brand fruit and some agent agency brand water. I don't want to see any agency, anything else that's hammered. Okay, agency and Kim's in the bathroom like, I'm not hammering. Stop accusing me of things, Mori. So Marisa wants to buy a new house, because why not? And Kyle loves the house they're in.

This was a few remember from a few seasons ago. This is her dream house. She's always loved it. And although nowadays, I think the house is actually on the market or already sold, but as of at least where we are in this episode, she's like, well, we haven't been able to find the house I like, so in order to give it some pizzazz to make it feel new, we're

just going to renovate it. So we're going to go all modern, we're going to add a fireplace in the bathroom, which seems excessive. Like how long are you going to do that? I mean, don't fart near it. Yeah, don't fart near it. Your whole house is going to go up and flame. Yeah. That's like the dumbest thing I've ever heard. And she's like, and we're going to change the shape of the pool. I'm like, that is such, why is this throwing your money in that fireplace at this point? What you're changing the shape of the pool? It is a smiley face emoji. I don't blame her. It's like a big smiling mouth. But now you're thinking of this. It's like, why? Why? It's so, it's such a waste of money changing the shape of the pool. Because I think people, they're showing their house.

I think they're just lying. And they've been showing. Guy out there, you'll learn. There's like, I'm so embarrassed. He's like, I'm so sorry. Don't be embarrassed. You're not the one who's reshaping a pool. God, no kidding.

Just. If you had to reshape a pool, Ronnie, would you do rectangle, lima bean, or different shapes? The poop emoji. Like, she's just basically going off emojis at this point. I think that they're showing their house and people have been coming in going, that pool is ridiculous. Yeah.

I think that's what it is. It must be. But it's like a pool. You should be so happy that you have a pool back there. I mean, who cares what shape it is, really, right? Unless you're swimming laps. I mean, I guess a rectangular pool is more chic, but, you know, I love the good old limo bean. I love to go to someone else's pool. I don't want

my own pool. You have to clean it. And pool boys are not as hot as they are in porn. Okay. Yeah. Trust. So, um, I think the reason why I think the other reason why she changed in the shape of her pool is that she sees Lisa van Opomp's Very cool rectangular pool and I think she wants something like that because she's you know She always wants but everyone else has a coffee cat She's like we're gonna call our new house bill a poster So I think she's just trying to erase the faith from that house because phase like the worst ever But Kyle keeps hiring her to remodel things. Yeah, it's like we're doing a good fade erase before we moved in

Seno so we can sell this fucker to be fair that pool I will say the thing about Kyle's pool is that it looks like whenever they throw parties There's awkward there's an awkward amount of space around it So it looks like people are always about to fall in so maybe she wants to do a shape that will make it more conducive for her to throw her white party. I love how much fun you're putting into Kyle's shirt. I can't help that. I can't help it. It's like that Ed Sheeran song. I'm in love with the shape of your pool.

I'm in love with your pool boy. But Guillermo del Toro presents the shape of Kyle's pool water. It's a smiley face. I'm not making this movie. So Rinne and Teddy meet for lunch. Now, we remember what happened when Rinne met with Eden for lunch. She spilled the beans, ate a chip, and then everything went

to shit. So this time she just, she starts it off the same way. She's like, hi, hi. hello, hi, hi, hi, hi, I have to give it to me. It's me, Lisa winner. I have to give you so many props for having the strength to go on a free luxury vacation. That was so great of you. That was huge. I love every time someone says something. She's like, whoa. She's like, I like horses. Oh my God, that's amazing. If only the conversation started on such an interesting note instead it was like yeah, I've got kids They're in preschool. Yeah, I've got kids kids kids kids kids kids. I was like oh

Even her bordering with the waiter is boring. She's like I'll take Adam mommy no salt She doesn't even say she doesn't even say I'll take Adam. I'm just do mind if we get Adam. I'm like why are you asking her? She minds? Do you mind? Come on, you're real housewife. Be more assertive. You're little arms, you're little T-rex arms. Oh, they showed the clip. Rin is like, oh, you know, sometimes I open up too early, baby. And they cut to her going, she's this close to dying, like a smidge.

She's like a smidge away from dying. Oh, very awesome. And then they cut to her at the end corner of the mexico being like did you say that my sister was a smidge close to dying and there's like She's like me. I don't even eat to see rolls From first to low. What would you say to reverse hello hi Reverse hi She's like, ah, hi. What are making me laugh so much? So all you can talk about is money, but she's trying to convince us that she's just one of us because Roseanne's coming back on the year. I don't know what she's doing. But she's like, God,

I'm just such a normal person. Did you hear me order at a mommy? Like, who does that? I mean, it was the cheapest thing on the menu. You know, preschools 35,000 a year, that's ridiculous. And Brynn is like, that is funny. My kids went to granola schools, okay? They didn't read until they were 10. Well, that explains a lot. Yeah, and Teddy is like, well, the thing that's funny about that is that I rode horses for a living like every weekend. So, hi, could I get some more edamame with the fact that a question was my life? Thanks.

That is crazy. Delilah Bell used to ride horses. Delilah Bell is a horse's name. That's like the kind of name Like then she got injured so she stopped baby So she did the next possible thing she became a model baby Teddy's like you know kids that grew up in broken homes and get a little lost That's why I turned to horses and you can just imagine Kids that grow up and broken homes and get a little lost. That's why I turned to horses and you just imagine

Lisa Vanderpump poking through the hedges in Teresushi being like did I hear the word broken? Is that broken bird here? Oh did I merely hear the word? Hoss That's just what lost people need GPS free traveling devices like there's no GPS on a horse You still gonna get lost stupid. I love how Rino just gets so excited about everything By the way, she's like so baby. Do you jump and she's like yeah, I said Hi jump So she's like I only have one Cartier bracelet look I grew up in South Carolina and I don't know who the Joneses are Okay, I have horses. I don't know who the Joneses are. Okay. I have horses.

I don't know what you're trying to do, but it's extremely boring. Rinna is so bored, she just starts putting on powder. She says, whoa, wow, whoa. Powder powder. Are we in between takes? This is this conversation so boring, I can't imagine being actually on camera right now. My face is sweating from boredom. Baby.

Hi, sweat glands So Vanderpump is putting together a long table at Villa Blanca when no one can really talk yeah Let's have a huge party and it'll look like a UN meeting darling And yeah, they're getting ready because basically PK asks if you can have the party there So of course this is like a darling of course, of course The extravagant super wealthy PK who wants his wife to spend a million dollar calls his friend for a free party I mean, hey, I would too. I'll always save a buck if I can but you know So this was my favorite part of the entire episode. We then cut to Doreet's house, where PK comes into the room

holding the girl Phoenix, is that her name? And starts seeing Happy Birthday. And the noises that Doreet made were so funny. I've listened to it on repeat so many times, because it's just like cracking cracked it cracked me up here here I recorded them I recorded them so here they are this is like the funniest thing I've ever heard ready? yeah happy birthday to you

happy birthday to you happy birthday to you. Admittedly, now I know she's like really reacting to the kid, but it's like the gobbledie Happy birthday to you. It's also the combination because the first one is the announcement. And then it's like the set up for them. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you.

Oh my god. And she's trying to make herself cry and she can't. And because like happy birthday, a baby and a balloon from pavilions. Like, oh my god. How broke are you? This was still at the house. So at this point, because he's like, he said something about how Jagga, Jagga's off some loud learning horses from Teddy's.

So to read, when she, to read through her babies, she's acting like she hasn't seen Phoenix in like two years. Like they've been re-init. Well, she's always amazed with her children, you know? And you can tell she's never seen them before. Yeah. She's always, yeah yeah it's like it's clear that they're like the 20 nannies only get to present the child once a month I can't believe

how close we've grown I'm going to put out some cruditeys for the kids guys boys boys the cruditeys in the next room for you I thought it's so bad for Molly the assistant. She was just like, I did all of this. I did everything. I mean, thank you for the chiron, but it would be nice, like for a Christmas tip, maybe something from you too. Yeah. So then we go over to Villa Blanca and Teddy and her husband Edwin shop, or as I like to call them, Tedwin. Um, and Edwin meets me. That's the most interesting thing about them. So thank you for gifting back to them. Tedwin.

So Edwin meets Lisa Van Opel. He's like, how beautiful are you? I was like, that's sort of a weird, a weird thing to say. She's like, how darling. So nice for you to be here. I'll have a pump teeny please. Look at you.

You're so handsome fit Vera young fit Vera did I say fit did I say Vera? Have a seat on my face kidding only on your birthday it win only on your birthday now go clear those champagne flutes off the bar You okay, don't you How hard reading a handsome man without his hand at the dog's ass to make it move. Make everyone think it's alive. Akin!

So then, Rinna walks and she's like, KEN! Nice to see you now. Hi. Hi, Ken. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Good to see you. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi.

Good to see you. Hi. Hi. Oh, Ken. Good to see you, Ken. Whoa. Whoa. Where is that?

At least right now. Goddamn, he's from other fucking beast's ringer's ear. He's Goddamn. So Erica comes in, but I don't know why he even wrote it down because I wrote Erica and all caps, and then that's how I wrote. Hi. I'm going to take to see it in big light now.

So then the reach shows up and she has that like wet hair look with like some barbed wire chic kind of metallic tiny skirt boobs out thing. It was intense. Yeah, it was intense. Edwin, and we cut all around because it's a party, you know. So Edwin's talking to Lee Simpson. She's like, what's YouTube virile person? And he's like, well, I run a home automation and security company.

And she's like, protect Lee's of Rinnis mouths from opening. Do you have an unlockable garage door? You can put it on that thing, darling. And Rinnis is like, hello, I'm here. I was invited. I'm surprised to hello new chapter. It's a new Lisa. Brynn, I hello. Don't let the light above jump. Okay. I think Camille grammar comes in and she's like, Mwah. What?

Mwah. Hi. You remember Kimber? Mwah. Hi. You remember Kimber? Mom. Hi. Did you catch this line and I swear to God I'm not making it up. Lisa Rina goes, well, it's weird to see PK. Last time I saw him, we had some bumps. Like, oh my God, you're just getting out of the cocaine accusation storyline.

Why would you use that terminology? Because like, bumps, I've never ever done bumps in my life. E-K, B-K, have you done bumps with Lisa Rina? Not at all. Bump teenies! See what you've started, Lisa Rina. You're blue in in me, lies.ina? You're ruining me, Lies! Now, did anyone get me a sunglasses

organized off my birthday? They'll just be wonderful. Just wonderful. I've had Molly at it all day long! I mean me, me! Me! Did you just say you're un-molly? Or did you not do Molly in your bathroom your bathroom baby or people you're party doing Molly That's a terrible thing to say about her This a Rina

Have you not decent seen making insults better assistant now? Poor Molly in immigrant from Kansas Hello, this is Countess Luand and accepts. I going to kill you all, but not before this ad. Would you believe it, girls? We have an app. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful

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feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or Wondery app. So of course the first thing you hear at dinner is this tunitartar is amazing. Very first thing. My compliments are Chef Penny.

Does Vanderpump even give people an option at this point? She's like, sure we'll have a party. We have tuna tartar a giant piece of salmon and some warm potato salad sticky toffee pudding for dessert So in PK is like well this year I thought I'd surprise you with an I thought it surprised you to read with with my with my birthday gift hold on one second Here's my birthday gift and it's Jagger and like a little surprised you do it with my birthday gift. Hold on one second. Here's my birthday gift, and it's Jagger, and like a little way Tuxedo, and Dorita Mealy goes back into Garbligubush,

because, Pobbly, baby, Pobbly. Like, is she ordering pizza? Pobbly, Pobbly, Pobbly, baby. There's her, baby, Pobbly, Pobbly. Pobbly, Pobbly, oh. It's like I brought you. Bissett! Binnibubli! Binnibubli! It's like I brought you... Binnibubli!

Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! It's like for your birthday I brought you... Bissett! Oh, I like also, by the way, it was very cute that Jagger was there in a little white tuxedo with a balloon but at the same time it was clear that PK he used up all his money on lashes but they kept with just that Bentley because yeah this was a

free gift and it was like look I brought the kid from home and also I put one gallon of gas into that gas guzzling monster I rented from the hurts enjoy It'd be one thing if when they were in Hong Kong that Jagger showed up. That's a birthday gift It's like they went out to the restaurant down the street. Yeah, you rented a baby tux I brought Jagger to dinner Tuna tartar and a rented tux on a baby. Wow. I just wrote poor ass mother fucker char and a rented tux on a baby. Wow. I just wrote poor ass and mother fucker. And Eric is like, oh, what a sweet little bad man. I brought a syringe to take a spada fluid. Passaboma. Oh, little bad. I would cry if I had a motion, but I don't because from the diamonds, not the ass.

Sweet little bed! You guys! Guys! Jaggers here! Guys! He passed the coded tas for Jagger. He just loves them. Bip-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop-o-pop- He says not a radish please. I'm the only one that understands him. Hoddan, Jagger's trying to say something. Bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo I told me right back darling. Boop boop boop boop. He says he wants to ride a questionry and tether Come back to the dot five in time. Wesley Dean Wesley Dean

So Doreen does Doreen Doreet. Sorry, this is my abbreviated names Doreet's like it's the best gift I could Oh, it means, it's the best gift I could hold for! And a Birken. I'm like, I think you got that last year. You can't just keep holding it up the same purse, okay? How many Birkins does anyone really need, right? How many? Yes.

Oh, those things are so huge. You're like giant diaper bags. Just get a gym bag. Got a ross. Just get one. Got one that says the deities. I don't know if you know this, but that's where you'll find me the countess glue-an So Jagger looks at Eric and he goes oh

She said you were a bad guy Hey, oh, oh, here I got he said he knows exactly why your dad abandoned you So wrong Bad guy bad guy oh Jagger you're such a spirited bad guy. Oh, what's that? Jagger oh he found a buyer for Kyle's house Guys Did he's did he call or a bad guy again now Now he was checking the price of these sheets from Target

He's very into superheroes and bad guys, you know like a bad Amanda Have you heard of that one? Superman It's about a bat And a man, I don't know I'm gonna make some gut buttons or beans later. You said, Manna. Are you religious? I sensed that about you. Let me, Jagger. Do you go to church also? So, uh, yeah, so then Jagger, he calls Eric a bad guy, but then he goes a point

to at least a van a pump. It's like, you're the bad guy. And she's like, well, I believed him at first. I thought, what a smart little boy. But then he pointed at me and I thought she's a broken bird and not the good kind. He's an about to be broken bird. So this is the one you push out of the nest and wait until some little girl comes along and touches it so it dies alone and cold. Do it quick, Vomagen is mouth. So we learned that Edwin used to be a backup dancer. And then Edwin turns to Erica because he's sitting near her and goes, so I hear your singers, he's like, I'm a performer. Which I thought was hilarious. Yes.

Yeah. I'm a performer, it's ours. That's what I'm not a singer. I'm a performer. I dance too. Wow. So I'm a triple threat. That.

And he's like, wow. I'm a triple threat, I sing off tune, off key, and out of pitch. He's like, God, I'm so bad with terms for things. God I always get the terms wrong. And he's like this is going to be surprising, but I was a backup dancer. It's not surprising. You're like a bottom twink.

I can't even believe you open your mouth to speak. Now get in the back and do some ooze. Eww, ew, ew. Eww, ew, ew. I'll one up you with the. E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E E And he's like, no, I didn't say that. I said, back up to answer. And Rinna's like, you know what? Listen to this Teddy. This is amazing, okay? So I was in my Tesla.

And it has a video thing where when you're listening to the song, the picture comes up. And it was your dad. It was great. Whatever happened that dayan that you sang about, are they still together? Good. Good. Now was he the reason that she quit cheers? Whatever happened that Diane that you sang about are they still together good? Good was he's a reason that she quit cheers tell me the true Teddy and

Jack we haven't seen much of Jack have we huh? We're Jack and Diane doing coke at your party Teddy So ruin it last Lisa Rina So so Erica's I I mean, Teddy's like, hmm, I felt some coldness between me and Erica, and I want to confront her about it. I'm like, this is, I'm getting some shades of Eden, so soon here. Like, the older, when she helped the Kimbertoards down three steps and Kim was cold to her about it.

But, in this case, Erica was really cold or oh and also Teddy is the one who's like, oh, I'm sorry, I called you a singer. God, I always have the wrong terms. So she's like, well, I felt like I was talking and I felt dismissed by you. And then we see the memory. And since it was last week and we didn't cover it, we'll say, but she's like, you know, it's John Cougar Melanchamp. I'm used to my dad, but it's no big deal. And then Eric goes, oh yeah, you're not defined by your parents, huh?

I was just kidding to be a asshole. And she goes, I'm sorry, but I don't think I did this, Miss. Yeah. I mean, what am I? The principal of Ride-El-Hide? I'm just missing anybody. Cut the school when you want. What do I give the fuck?

I don't care. That was a little fuck. fuck yeah she basically like well Terribly sorry that I said that to you, but I'm turning into Toya. Well what I should did but I'm Terribly sorry, but I don't think I said that I take notes after every conversation I have True that's what she told Brian moreland at the thing that we saw conversation I had. That's true, that's what she told Brian Moreland at the thing that we saw. And she's like, oh, you're crazy. Not on, it's not on my outline.

I've got it right here on my phone. A2, Teddy was bullying. Did you talk about this with your glam slot squad? Oh, you don't have one. Oh, you have a trampoline. I guess that's sort of the same thing. You want to claim to know Teddy Kennedy too, huh? Well, I'm terribly sorry if you thought I was being called.

Anyway, I will now rotate 20 degrees this direction and not look at you the rest of the night. I got the most interesting person at this table. So Teddy's like, alright, and then Eric can tell us. Okay, you didn't get a warm feeling from me and I guess. So Teddy's like alright and then Erica tells us okay You didn't get a warm feeling from me and I So then Lisa Vanderpump ever the shister is like Rina Rina make a speech Which of course there's no reason why I'm gonna make a speech, but she also can't help it Someone says make a a speech. She's like, okay, I guess I'll do it. I could do this.

So she merely stands up and Jagger starts a clap, which is where she's like, and she's like, well, if you look at where we were, nine months ago, I mean eight months ago, I mean even seven months ago, six months ago, five months ago, honestly three months ago. No, let's two months ago. Honestly, like a month ago. Three weeks ago. If you really look at where we're, I mean, two weeks ago, I'm in my kitty. Oh, we here. Okay, yesterday. It's morning. I mean, is it wild? I'm here. Not on my face. I'm here. Baby. It's a miracle. you know what's else in miracle these dusters. It's just beautiful if you want one calling right now I'm sorry. I'm going on the wrong script. Are you kidding me baby? It's like doing turns in her dust Yeah, it's like it's my birthday

Lisa van der Poomp. It's not time to play with you Lisa. In it all Yeah, because basically all of Rena speech was about how amazing it was that she's been forgiven and she's there. So anyway, thank you everyone. Congratulations to me and you're welcome. So as usual, I'm Win Baby! So next we get a scene with, oh I was saying she's like, I'm not buddy, buddy with her, but it shows how willing I am to move forward and I lean outside with her little remote control.

Like, why won't this work? What is happening to her? Let me in this restaurant. My robot has gone rogue. So speaking of our little Erica. Baaah! Yeah! Baaah! Baaah! Baaah! Baaah!

Baaah! Baaah! I've got a ballot coming. I want a lot of book and film. I'm going to get Baaah! Baaah! So this is our friend, Brian Moilin. I love that he got this gig, by the way, because Brian, we've had him on the show,

I think two, maybe three times. He's such a sweetheart. Everything Erika said was right. He is super smart. I'm sure a lot of you guys read his recaps in Vulture, but she basically reached out to Brian. It was like, will you write my autobiography? And so here he is.

Here to talk to Erika. We take some stories and make me have a personality and a book. Thanks. It's like she's like picking a funny charming gay guy to be her, which is so Erica. Yeah. So what's it sideways on my couch and talk about my dad? And Brian is so gay guy too, because first of all, he wore that skirt. No, wasn't like she was like, it was like, it was like,

no, neither it was, there were sort of like cool lots or something. And I love them. Yeah, I'm still don't have the balls to wear them, but I will one day and I think of them every day now that I've seen them. And so he wore those, that's like his look for the year, I think. So he's like, um, daddy issues,

he's like, yeah, okay, look, let's start about what we've done so far. We talked about being unruly and being headstrong Sounds this sounds great so far Hey, can we talk about your skirt shorts? Let's talk about that. What about that? Yeah, Erica tells us or you know, if she doesn't know her dad and she met up with him for the first time in her 20s, etc. And she was with her dad and et cetera. And she was with her dad and her dad's new wife. And there was like a toddler. And she was like, so what's the deal with the toddler? And apparently he told her, well,

I never had kids and she never had kids. So we thought, let's have a kid. And she's like, oh, uh, which was that's actually like a terrible thing to hear. Yeah, it was sad. It's so it's actually so mean to say that. I mean, even though I know he probably meant like I never raised a kid, but you don't say that to your, the daughter that you could have raised and didn't, you know. Yeah, I was expecting him to be so sensitive, just kidding. And so, Brian, just like everything she says, he's like, so how does that make you feel, you know, do you think that those daddy issues maybe came, they're affecting your life now?

And I'm like, no, I don't give a fuck. I'm just saying it because it's something that happens. So I love Ferris wheel. And he's like, what about your daddy issues? Well, I also like those little chocolate trouble things and I'll either one I want to, because I don't give a fuck. It's like, so your dad.

Anyway, why don't we do another chapter? We can talk about my daddy long legs. Are you sure you don't have any daddy issues? I'm positive. Hey, did you hear my new song called Daddy I Miss You? Hey, can we get this done by Father's Day? That's the name of the album, of course, of a tie and well. Forgive me, Father, for absent.

Did I tell you about confirmation? I'm gonna do a couple of Papa don't breach You want to hear that story? Hey, I'm hungry. You want to order some Papa jobs? Uh, the boy we can just like hang back and watch a DVD like I got daddy daycare. I got Daddy Daddy daycare I got Daddy There's not there's not far we can go when you start when you start it with daddy long legs Nothing's good to talk daddy my pet daddy long legs I

Will be a father figure put your time in hands and mom. That's rising to my daddy long legs Papa don't reach to my right girls Daddy Papa daddy get a human Papa Papa Papa that's how it goes Thank God you here Brian, Marlundu fix me a my singing knowledge Thank God you here, Brian Monando. Fix me on my singing knowledge. The Papa, the Papa, the President. Let's just do that part of tradition, okay?

He's like, there's Fiddler on the roof. Remind you of your daddy. Issues, let's talk about that. No, but I did name my daddy long legs. Tevya. So Vanderpump and, oh no, no, no, sorry. Yeah, the only thing that I've been up is there, but I was in the previous scene. And I was like, wait, we're doing this again. So Vanderpump is sweeping the bridge, but you can tell she's never swept a damn thing

in her life. I had to sweep in a musical lens. And my parents were like, we were terrible parents. You don't even know how to hold a broom, you know? Like you couldn't even be believable in the one tiny scene you had, Ronnie. Well, this is big problem is that the fizzles were on the wrong side. She was like, yeah, okay, let's scrape this

just the way with this pole here. I caught my fizzle pole. You put the fizzles on your shoulder here. So, Rinne comes, she was like, Hello, hi, hanky, Panky. Are you kidding me? I'm missing. Wow.

Hi, Hanky. Hi, Panky. Thank you. It's a miracle I'm here. Vanderbilt's cleaning her bridge. So Rinne's dressed like a cowboy. And then, Doreet comes over to, she's like, guys, I kept with your dress.

I mean, we're going to a horse show. We're not going to rodeo. Although I guess you can make a dogma that really it was like a horse show. Oh, it's crazy. Clearly these ladies know nothing about horses. It's not the Kentucky Derby you fucking moron. I know.

We're going to like, you're not even going to San Diego. You're just going someplace in your San Diego. There's no reason, no, there's no reason dress up like you're going to Ascot when you're going in a 50 mile radius of San Diego. That's just the part of the vault. Um, and, uh, uh, uh, Vanderprime doesn't care what you tell her to wear to an event.

She's going to show up in a see-through Lay shirt in a black bra. That's like her thing this season. I don't know where she found this But she's like I'm wearing it in every episode different colors and no one thinks I smell. It's called branding It's my color story so Yes, they all pile into a car. Doreet cannot believe how their dress. She's like So, um, yes, they all pile into a car. Doreet cannot believe how their dress. She's like,

I do not know where we're going. I don't understand. Guys, I think I'm just gonna dress properly, but they know better, of course. So they're driving, they're in this limo or a van or whatever, and they're making jokes about Lisa Vanderpump's age about Lisa being only three years older than Lisa Rinna. Yeah, Rinna's like, yeah, bright, baby.

Own it on your age. And Vandercomps, like, if you want me to prove it to you, here's a license for what driving horticulture, flying tour guiding, I don't know, but it's a license for something. And Rina's like, what is it gonna say she's 80 it's like She's doing a soft clap in the middle of the night. So, Rinner's like, how old are you? 75?

As you can see, only thing 75 is at least a Rinner's IQ. I don't often get to say burn because chef Joe cooks everything so perfectly So you know they're packing up at least a minute bump was fine. She's like I did had you live out one thing I said only a hundred eight pounds You guys I love me some Lisa Vanderpump I will I will stand up for her no matter what happens But there is no way she's three years older than Lisa Rina don't lie about your age What does that do for you? It just makes people think is she not moisturizing?

Did she smoke too many cigarettes in her 20s? You're beautiful at whatever you age age I should believe that she's 57 I believe it she said just it's born 1960 57 I think I think it I believe it. I think that she's the problem with Lisa Vanderpump is that she started to kind of dress a little older and matronly. You know, she does have these, I think she used to dress a little bit, she, I think she used to have more sort of a more of a style, not stylish look, but she sort of dress a little bit younger earlier on the like back when the show began and now she's sort of gotten into like what you said, frilly pink things like a lot of times she'll be found wearing like a pirate shirt, you know,

or a pussy bow. So I think she I think she's aging herself with her style actually a little bit. It's all in the style. But at least her in it's like, well, she's three years older than me. So I'll always have that one on her. So next up, Teddy and Tracy, the trainer. By the way, Teddy, did you know something? I actually, Teddy said something really interesting here. Did you hear this? No. I can't.

This is what I'm struggling to listen to her. No, this is actually, I thought this was pretty interesting. She goes, there are a few things I love more than writing horses I also like Coming horses I like braiding horses tails. I like borrowing horses because I'm not gonna buy a fucking horse Okay, and the horses name is virtue and she's like virtue, we're gonna get along just great today, right? I'm like, what are you borrowing the horse? And she's like, well, this horse is done by my trainers because horses are expensive, okay?

You pay for the horse, it's care, it's food, it's shoes, I mean it's more expensive than a child. You can only imagine how much money Christians parents had to spend. So rude. It's so rude. I just had to go for it. I saw the joke. I had to go for it. So rude. So rude. I just had to go for it. That's how the joke I had to go for it, everyone. I'm sorry. I'm not against horse rentals for all of us,

like normal people, but you're on the real housewives of Beverly Hills. Stop talking about budgets and money and how you've had four things. Stop trying to act like you're one of us, Teddy, when you are representing a horse farm called Balmoral. Okay, that is, that's where the queen lives, Balmoral. Don't act like you're one of us when you represent Balmoral.

So the girls find her and she's like, you guys, I said close to shoes. I mean, it's not only about safety, it's about horseshit, and there's portageons. This girl is really coming out of the gate running Guys, there's a portahean named John Okay, can I like a cup of coffee please hold the beans John where's the porter guys? I love this side of Teddy because you can see She's got a passion for horses That's something with a bone-dowa

Yeah, Lisa Vanderpump had a full-on lady boner with all these horses around it was making it be crazy Because you know again Teddy's like I grew up competing every single weekend blah blah blah and we see Teddy doing a question in which was all great and while in great and Lisa goes Teddy takes it to another level I ride Teddy is a consummate professional does she have a tiny little pink house from her best friend of my homie to house her midget horses no but she is a professional she is nothing if not professional And then Teddy's like Sakh

sexy unique horse Sakh So Teddy's like yeah, I just wrote the horses because I love horses and Vanderpump goes Are you religious because that's something I'm picking up? What? Well, first of all, Teddy gets off the horse because she wins. And I was like, great job, great job, hi, hello horses. And Teddy is like, yeah, it was sort of weird because it was scary,

because normally I like to do this when I'm prepared, but I wasn't prepared. So at this point, you just get on there and give it up to God. And then I'm like, are you lycheeous? And what I loved is Fetty goes, yeah, I actually go to church every week and Vanderpump goes, I support our church as well. Which is not the same as going every week.

I couldn't tell what she said there. I wrote down, and that's quite a church. I was like, what are you talking about? And then Rina cut Rina chimes because I love church. And Vander Poe. Well, you should go. You need religion, Rina. Oh, for forgiveness. And five hair marries and a check every couple of months for a couple of dollars So Pandora has someone to get married if she ever does it twice Dreads probably like guys. What's this church you talk of? I don't understand Is that like synagogue but not synagogue? I love a fried chicken

I'm talking about Charlotte Church. Darling it's Charlotte Church. Oh we're talking about Winston Churches. Oh I just saw the darkest hour. It was not that dark. I thought the darkest hour was when I saw America's pretty little pus. More like the darkest crevice. This horse wear underwear. Eercodoses.

So, Erica speaking up, she's like... Hello, Bob, it's FaceTime. It's me, Erica. Give me some stories. I've told them about being headstrong. I've told them about a daddy-long legs. I've told them about us. Oh, you told them about daddy long legs. I told them about. Oh, you told them about Tavia. Oh, yeah. It's important for my mom to have a voice in my book because she frames it.

She frames my story. Bethlehem of his. The editor first say D on this too. Cause the mom's like, remember when you modeled for sacks when you were just a kid and then they cut to Erica going, I've been the thumb and since I was a kid. Modeling in like the sack so so funny.

Sacks with Avenue, although that wasn't the sack that I modeled for. I modeled for the sacks as in more more kind of saxes suck shop that we had a downtown. saxophone. I worked at the saxophone rental place all the balls from the high school bed got one from me kids. That was nice to be able to play on it. So her mom's like, oh I remember when you remember when you would get toys after you performed well in audition, she's like, I don't know, ship myself, mom. Stop

taking credit from all the time. I'm for myself. Okay. I earned my pound Papa Oh Papa that's my new ballot I'm gonna fuck unless you're a pound Papa whatever happened to pound Papa's anyway Oh I get your pound Papa Oh

Papa miss your pound Papa what are you that one, Bob? So, Bob, I got this new bell that come here, it's called PAMPAPE. Prentices song for Tevye. She knows how it goes. Help you. I have your pound, PAMPAPE. Do you want to play Tevye with your eight legs?

Oh my God. So she's like, I don't want my mom. I want my mom in the book, but not my dad. Because my mom was sending pictures. I mean, broke back and said, stop sending pictures of this kid, rubber to vagina. He's gonna get me thrown in jail. But I was just practicing for my future career.

It's a pussy panel. She actually told a really terrible story about how her grandmother, her paternal grandmother, would get pictures of baby Erica and send them to the paternal grandfather, I guess they were separated. And he would send them back saying that his son didn't want to see them. I was like, oh Yeah, it does. Yeah, but that's not funny. So I'm just ignoring it Ericka's like, well, we forget we forget hell rich life is Not how rich I am though. I'm reminding it up you right now. See look at my big tails Hey, look behind me. There's an Erica and Mikey pillow.

You think that was cheap? That wasn't cheap. I'm literally painted it on now. Like I'm office. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Wow. So, Tannie and Edwin, Tegwin, are going over to Dereet. Dereet. Dereet. Dereet. Yeah, I wrote slate. Why are you leaving? And then I was like slate.

What the fuck is that? And Teddy would be talking to like a slab of rock. Or she just turned someone to stone with her empty telling about how much she lets horses. Still like I'm turning tone right now. Slate's like, why are you leaving? She's like, because we hate you. Okay, bye. Mommy, daddy needs special time.

It's late to him and they're other, oh, that's right. Is there, they're their crews and slate the other kid? Or do they have other kids? Yeah, slate crews. So she's, she's kind of being addicted to her daughter and being like, I'm going to leave you, but she's squatting right at the top of the stairs.

And I was like, you must really trust that kid because you could be pushed backwards at any moment. Have you never seen the Omen Teddy? You're being very dangerous right now. She's like, no, I won't pay for cable because I mean, that's really expensive. Okay. So, so she's getting ready to go to Dereet's house for dinner and Dereet, meanwhile, is unpacking her Hermes dinnerware that she spent almost $20,000 on. She's like,

Oh, guys, Molly, we can't tell PK about this. We absolutely can't. Otherwise, if he finds out, just say there was an accident when I was reorganizing my sunglasses and this just happened. Okay, just say that Say hello Siner That's the boy I'm China China

He's like what's up, Burba? And she's like he goes what are these Erica? I don't know the boxes of random things They just came here. It's something from China Erica what are those? All those dishes? A few white lois, won't hit anyone. Guys, guess there's some lois. I've got no idea, Pika. They just came in individual boxes. I think that group pilot's sitting air-meas now, so we really got a great deal on them.

So Edwin and Teddy, she's like, should we stop and get her a nicer wine? This one was 30 bucks. I mean, that's a lot, okay? Like, what's important of inviting someone if they have to pay to come? That's ridiculous. He's like, babe, we're stopping over and we're getting nicer wine. She's like, ugh. This is why these people go broke on these shows.

Because I think that bringing a $30 bottle of wine someplace is expensive for us, you know? But it is kind of funny that here's Jereet who's unpacking unnecessary $20,000 China from Air Mazz and then he's like, I'm bringing a $30 bottle of wine. Yeah, but Jereet's also one of those phony people that every waiter knows that's like, I'm bringing a $30 bottle of wine. Yeah, but Doreet's also one of those phony people that every waiter knows that's like, let me smell the wine before I drink it.

And they move it around in their cup a lot, and they sniff it. And then they check the air with their thumb, and then they drink it and they're like, it's delicious, that tastes the blueberry. And you're like, I just gave you the $5 glass of it. It's how I wasn't gonna open the $80 bottle. Are you? It's very, it's very smoke forward. I like it a lot food forward smoke

I get some chocolate nerds. I like it pk Let's just do get it. It's of the sure Shove in your Thomas Charles Shaw Thomas. What is this pk? I can't read actually Thomas Shaw good old friend a boy Who else to know if I mentioned so at that two buck chuck two buck chuck yes at the house wait I had to say that because I know people were listening because not Thomas Shaw. It's Charles Shaw. Oh, I thought you said Charles I know but I didn't say it with authority

I know, but I didn't say it with authority. Oh, I think I know this. I know it's Charles Shaw, because last night I bought a bottle of wine at Whole Foods, because I don't even drink wine. So that's where I was last night. I was like, I need some wine. And they had two back check there. It was shocked. Really at Whole Foods?

Are you sure you're at Whole Foods? Yeah, they had it there. And it's a, I mean, it's away from everything else. It's like, okay, disgusting poor people come over here. So Dorita is now cooking in the kitchen. She's making some chickpea thing and she's like, I'm actually very good cook. I, I live for my mother who, and she's just a great cook too. And I'm now making PK's favorite dish, favorite dish in the whole world. But first we're going to start with some white wine and then there's some cheese and some croutotai.

My mom was basically like a professional chef and then they show a clip. Mom, what you learn to make this? And she goes, I googled it. Yeah, I remember how mad I got last year during that scene where she was like, I can't find flat bread in all of Los Angeles. Where? Where did you ever find this in the mom's like, I just Googled it. Because if you just go down Fairfax Avenue, it's like pedicentral and you can get flat bread anywhere. It's also called pedabread. Yeah. It's also the round bread. Where did you find the round bread, mom?

Isn't this a made, what do you call this, this, what is this puffy thing? It's called a loaf of whole wheat. Oh! Oh! Bobbie! Oh! I'm ready, my love, just by the skin of my teeth! So Teddy gets there and she's like, I'm on time, okay? Because I'm a accountability coach,

so I have to be accountable for my time. And right now I'm on time. So are you ready? Because I hope you are. If not, here's my card, give me a call. I almost brought you a shitty bottle of wine, but I didn't have to tell you that. Because I'm an accountability coach

and I'm also my only client. So here I am, a good concept. So she's like, Pee-kay, they brought us some Champagne-ness. I think we're gonna need fruits. Go get some fruits, P.K.A.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I.I mean, you wouldn't eat cereal with a fork, you need a knife too. She's such an idiot. You need a knife too. Doreep, you can drink out of a cereal bowl too, you know that, right? You know, you're making a really bad comparison. Yeah, it was a very, it was a problematic analogy.

You wouldn't eat cereal without the K-pop! It was a problematic analogy. You wouldn't eat cereal with that to K-pop! You wouldn't eat cereal in a non-emased bowl? So Teddy's like, do you guys want another baby? Like kind of, do you guys want another baby? Maybe tonight, tonight, but not for us, because we had a scary delivery. We would have just had 10 girls, but you know, we wanted to just keep trying for the boy. So we just kept trying and trying

and trying and then you know, I couldn't and it made me sad because my one job was to make a baby and I was failing. So it's like, whoa, thanks for coming over. Yeah. Exactly. Thanks for bringing your cheap wine and sad story. No kidding. Yeah, Cruz. like he came out and then they're like, Kudlu, he's not breathing. And then it turns out he has like, we all have three vowels, but he only has two that work. It's like a rusty valve. And I feel like it's my fault because I was like, I want to choose a boy and it's like really got choice. And it's like my fault. So anyway, a rusty valve. That's my favorite shot. Did you notice? Did you notice that PK was like well if we have to have flutes then we're just drinking wine

Yes, so he didn't go for the champagne Which means they bought a nice bottle of champagne that he's gonna regift later So he doesn't look like such a cheap ass like that's the wine works That's off you that's honestly the way wine works most of the time It's just like it's a bottle just gets passed around from party to party and that that's okay. So I'm with the game. I'm not gonna nail out those flutes, especially because you know that like three probably bought six separate orchestral flutes. These are for the bubble. It's a pan flute. No don't let that make you think you can cook in it. I've tried. Burnt millet, something fierce.

Now don't you worry, they won't hurt you. Especially if you've got your flute chart. The free. Because like, why didn't you tell me he's like running down the street? So the peak is like, well, know when I when I had my first child He came out blue with a cone head I made a monster in either way and just how he says that he's like he came at blue with the cone head like literally a cone head I was looking at him like

Teddies like this is my moment to have personality and you're taking it away from me Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, hello, hi. What does this mean? Is Lisa Rina running a marathon? Is she showing up at a restaurant? Is she backstage at the Oscars? Who knows? Because it always starts to say, hello, hi. Are you kidding me? No, it's just Kyle on FaceTime. Yeah.

Kyle's like, look at me. We're on a private boat. It's amazing. Yeah. What are you doing, loser? Hey, look, it's my annual start of the season yacht trip that I have on the show. But they didn't, they decided they didn't want to pay for it this time because no one's ever interested in it.

So I just have to face time in. But I am wearing an agency hat. So nailed it. Yeah. So yeah, Kyle's like, what's basically like what happened agency new pool? Yeah, and Rin is like oh, it was great seeing PK again, you know what Kyle time heals Well, not everything. I mean it doesn't hello be to the apparently, but you know, they were nice to me So I didn't get a check after dinner so

So then we go back to the dinner party and Rita is like, guys, I'm gonna serve you. Okay, I'm gonna sit right now. And so she's like serving her garbanzo bean thing and Pique is like, this is actually my favorite thing that she cooks, which is not, I don't know why. Because it was, because it was really funny. She's like, pick her loves me cooking. And he's like, yes, this is my favorite dish. It's called the Moroccan dish. Even though it's not Moroccan, I don't even know what Moroccan means.

Is that having to do with our chair that we have back there at rocks? You know the Moroccan dish. I come up with, apparently she came up with a recipe recipe while she was rocking she said look at my rockin If you see mo rockin don't come on. Okay. Am I right guys blue babies my right guys blue babies and turn heads You know that every Dish Doreet makes a it's like I call this one the mushy one. It's like you probably can't identify a damn thing Doreet ever makes We call this one Sudan So yeah, so to restart serving dinner and

You know they have like a three bites before P.G. I start launching it to how much he hates Lisa Rina. Oh Yeah He's like well You know the first time we had someone over here was Lisa Rinner, and we thought it was a wonderful night, but apparently it wasn't as pleasant for them. Because after they left, she went and told the entire town. Bad things about me. It's like if you left here and said the host are awful. He made jokes about a blue baby, etc. etc. She went and told everyone that we had a mild problem. And the truth is, if she was paying attention, she would have seen that we did not have been a miracle. Just like, look everybody, it's George Michael. You can't hear him, we'll listen harder.

Doesn't it look handsome? No one can see him, PK. PK, quick. Play a cassette of Wama. So, Deready, you're not going to be able to see him. I'm not going to be able to see him. I'm not going to be able to see him. I'm not going to be able to see him. I'm not going to be able to see him. and some no one can see in PK ah PK quick player cassette of Wama ah

so Dereet even says PK thinks she skits her don't you remember last week saying he never said those things Rina he never said she was skits her and now she's saying it again she's like I mean I mean it's so crazy the crazy is the thing

I mean we went to Hong Kong and we're having a wonderful is the thing. I mean, we went to hunger-konga, and we're having a wonderful time. She invites me into a room, and we have a nice time. And the next scene of that night, it was like a missile attack. It was crazy. Like, I'm supposed to pass this all, what's time in Hong Konga? It was a missile attack. It was designed to hurt me.

It's like if the property brothers sketch something out and build hurt They built a heart living room for someone who beat something like that. Oh tell you her name is Lisa Rinners She's nuts, okay, so she's going off and then she gets mad. She's like who would give a speech at my birthday? It's so vicious. Yeah, I'm like, yeah. No, I'm just like, Lisa, it's like, I mean, we all saw that Lisa Vanderpump, Lisa Vanderpump basically told Lisa Rennah to do it.

It was like a joke speech, it wasn't like a real speech. Yeah, and Teddy's like, I thought you forgave each other, and now you're at dinner talking about it again. That's not what it's called forgiveness, okay? Forgiveness is where you like say, do you want me to do the prayer? I go to church.

I'll sit and stand about you. You know what, next time I come over, I bring yellowtail wine. PK is bringing, you know, PK is gonna put a bow around that champagne and accidentally give it to them when they invite them over. Oh, I, it is champagne. It's actually from Australia I don't know the same thing prison colonies

And that ends it up. Oh, no Teddy goes well, I mean she seems vice-find it the Warsaw I'm finding all this very shocking and PK goes you just wait babe shocking and PK goes, you just wait, babe. Babe. Damn. And that brings us to the end of another episode of Lisa Rina Designing Things to Hit the Reats. Yes, so funny. Guys, thanks for listening to this episode.

We'll be back tomorrow to talk real housewives of New Jersey, which will be, I'm sure, very entertaining. Watch what happens dot com to get your concert tickets and concert like we're for my concert, but you know, our live show tickets and merch dice and all that stuff. And we'll be back tomorrow to chat. Yes, everybody. We love you much.

Bye, everyone. Bye. Hey, prime members. You can listen to WatchcraftPantsens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or, you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.