Watch What Crappens - RHOC: A-hole in One
Episode Date: August 29, 2018The ladies of Real Housewives of Orange County celebrate birthdays by golfing together and fighting over who accused Emily's asshole husband of being an abusive asshole husband. Tamra started... it. This week's bonus episode is about our tour through Luann destinations in Palm Beach and penises in Atlanta. To hear it, become a Patreon member at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. ***Limited Edition Garsh! tees only on sale through August at crappensmerch.com! **Crappens Live is coming to Denver, NYC, Seattle and Nashville! Find ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts!
It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates.
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Launching during Pride!
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Hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens, a podcast about all that crap we just love to
talk about on Yeal Browse.
I'm Ronnie Caram, I'm also on the Rosepricks Bachelor Roast podcast.
Which is about to wrap up in the next couple of weeks until next year.
So get your butts over there and listen.
And here I am with my gorgeous, talented, handsome, lovely, caring sweet man of my life,
Ben Mandelker.
Hello, Ben.
Oh, hi, Ronnie.
How are you?
How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? How are So we just finished up a bonus episode talking about our trip to West Palm Beach in Atlanta to see all of Luan's Hangout spots
We did a tour in a golf cart and then in Atlanta going to a strip club and meeting all you crazies
So that bonus episode is over at L Patreon go find it there also our Google Hangout is tomorrow night or rather Thursday night at 6 p.m
Pacific time so get over there and hang out with us
It's gonna be another little party.
And we don't don't you worry. We're gonna still show some live shows. We've got some amazing live show cities coming up next
in September, which I guess is almost next month. It's September. So we're going to be in Denver, Colorado
which is gonna be a huge family show for me. I've got a lot of family coming out to that one,
cousin Jenna, her hot husband, Rodidi.
Lots of my family's gonna be there.
We are also going to in October.
We're gonna do two shows in New York.
We have two separate nights in New York.
So we're gonna be at Grammar C Theater there.
So guys, get over there.
October is gonna be an amazing two shows in New York.
And then in November, we are going to be in Seattle.
And then in December, we're going to be in Nashville.
Whoa.
Yeah, guys.
So if you are hearing tales of these crazy things that happened over the weekend in Atlanta
and in Palm Beach, you know, you have a chance to ride the crap in the way of two.
So like we really, we really can't recommend it
highly enough for you guys to get tickets if you can
because these shows, every single one is crazy.
You never know what's gonna happen at the shows,
you never know what madness is gonna happen.
It's like, they're great.
So definitely go to watchocrapids.com to get them.
And also, you know, talking about Patreon,
we have a tier of Patreon called Crap and Spotlight.
And a bunch of you guys have signed up for that.
And that's basically a chance to, where we turn the podcast over to you for two minutes.
And you get to talk for two minutes and we play it on the podcast.
I have sent messages to a bunch of people being like, hey, we'll use send something in
or whatever.
So double check your inboxes because I email you through Patreon. Double check
because I haven't received anything and I don't want you guys to feel like we're just
taking your money and not you guys aren't getting anything out of it. So like I really
want to make sure you guys get an opportunity on the pod to do your thing here on the podcast
and if you haven't heard from me, send me a message, ask somebody, I don't care because
I want to hear from all of you guys. So definitely make sure you're getting the most out of your Patreon support because
we certainly appreciate it and we want it to be worth it for you too.
Hi everybody.
And one more thing.
Okay.
Brondel.
Brondel.
So what was so fun for me on Saturday in Atlanta was your birthday.
And I got to surprise you with a whole bunch of things,
including a message from Leanne Lockin,
including a message from Kelly Dodd and Leah Black
and Kate Chastain and Lisa Rinna.
So amazing, thank you for that.
But you know what, it's not done, it's not done.
Oh, for Christ's sake. We have a a late edition so just sit back and listen. Oh, I don't hear it.
Is it playing? Oh, of course it's not playing. Of course it's not playing. Oh, we hold on.
I thought I was playing before. Okay, we hold on. Let me try again. Did you hear you didn't hear any of that? No.
See, see, this is now it's all going shit. I mean, I'm gonna try it all over again. Okay, ready? Yeah.
Hey guys, it's Ariana. I'm here in my childhood bedroom and you know how they always say you
should never meet your heroes. Well, in Ronnie's case, I would say you should always meet Ronnie.
So happy birthday. I love you. And if you'll know, excuse me, I'm going to go try and some kitten heels from 2002.
Thank you, little Ariana, little Muppin.
She continues to not be mad at us. Yes, thank you. And really thank you for such a great, great
birthday. That was wow my best ever
Yeah, and Ariana she was trapped
Now Ben's gone everybody what the hell is going on today?
Like can I just be grateful without the whole world crushing it on me?
I know the universe isn't used to it and we're back
Sorry my laptop crash. I was just in the middle of saying how we love Ariana.
And she's so cool.
My laptop was like, no, I don't agree.
And just like shut down.
Yeah.
Well, thank you so much for that.
And everybody now it is time to move on
to some real housewives of Orange County.
A quick announcement.
Our schedule is a little weird because real housewives
of New York is ending.
And Mary Dometeson is beginning,
but we've already got five shows a week.
So next week, we're gonna move Shaws to Mondays
for a little while because it's gonna be Shaws
on Monday, Tuesdays, Orange County, Wednesdays below deck,
Thursdays, Rehaaswaz of New York, tilustin.
Thursday is,
Friday.
Sorry, Friday is Rehaaswaz of Dallas, okay?
And then Mary-Dometes medicine, we're gonna start watching,
but we won't start full recaps of that until we have an opening in the schedule and Lord only
knows when they it's gonna come. I know, I know. Everything's crazy right now, but you know,
basically once New York is wrapped up, I'm sure everything will then be smooth. And I'm sorry,
Southern terms of Anna, you've just been the child that has been left behind. You were the Kevin McAllister
We have not found a place for you and and I'm sorry. I know that's not very nice
We even missed recapping the episode where Daniel Irons is here. I mean, that's just not right. I know
It's it's a shame, but you know we can only do so much, you know
Yeah, so you know good luck with your sake, hey lady
So the meantime... I'm still feeling a little bit of haggard shaming.
You know, you've had no chance to torture haggard, which has been the worst.
I know, it's a shame, and or to praise, what's your face, which is my favorite,
my favorite person on that show, Catherine. Is that her name, Catherine? Yeah, Catherine.
Yeah. Um, but what every name is, I applaud, I applaud you, I applaud you, like
upgrading a apartment from that IKEA mess from last season. Like good job. I do.
Notability. It looks just like Twitter job. I do. Notability.
It looks just like Twitter when you're blind.
OK, so I just open Twitter, stupid.
OK, what I meant to open was Real Housewives of Orange
County and Notability.
So let's get on to Real Housewives of Orange County.
I'm sure tons is going to happen today.
Well, it opened up with land in of all people.
It was like, and then I realized
it was a pot of dolphins off a new port beach
still trying to make a go of it bless her heart yeah and Archie's barking Archie's
like okay okay Archie okay okay okay
okay
I am an Archie
so Shannon has upgraded.
I love her new house.
I mean, it's a downgrade for her, but I think it's really cute.
She's gotten rid of David, finally, and he got rid of himself, but still, you know, good.
And now she's got this new trainer, Kevin, who is not going to say, wow, when she takes
off her clothes.
Yeah, yeah.
And he first shows up at the door and he's backlit, which I thought was a really strong look for him, because I take soft for cliffs. Yeah, yeah. And he first shows up at the door, and he's backlit,
which I thought was a really strong look for him
because I was like, damn, because all I saw
was like arms and shoulders and stuff.
And I was like, damn, check out Shannon's new trainer.
And so she's like, well, Steven, I'm a hogger.
And I'm like, David, he would never touch me.
David, David, I think I'm going to make myself an amino acid
because it pumps me up.
I love an amino acid. Would you like me to get you started with some potato chips so you can eat
judgingly because I try to exercise and better myself, David. Would you like a kidwap old that you can
judge? Roodley? But then they get that. Do you want some of my amino acid? I have some she goes no well, well, yes
Well, I mean I have
I have
I mean I guess they're 21 technically by 20 all do I need all the amino acids? No
Oh, what kind of amino what kind of animal is in the mean? No anyway
For so many years I was just thinking of a
Maso and now I'm thinking Amino.
So Kevin's like, um, so, what's his name?
Steven and he's not as hot as I thought he was originally.
Sorry, he's hot, but like, not really.
Jesus.
I know.
I don't know what's happening to me.
I'm like caffeinated and being a nassol.
Sorry.
You're calling him a Kevin because that's what I wrote down and he's a stripper.
So he can be called what I call him. Yeah.
Which he's not a stripper probably, but to me, after going to swing Richards in Atlanta,
you're all strippers people who work out. Okay. I'm gonna give him a five and call him Kevin.
Yeah, you're either Mustang or you're not. Yeah. so it's like so. Um, let's, you know,
let's get to know each other. Like, for example, this morning when you got got up, did you
go for a walk or have any kind of physical activity? She goes, no, no.
Sometimes when I walk, I pee in my pants. It's like, well, run me through what you did do this morning, and she goes, hmm, nothing. Well, I sat and thought about my marriage to David and how he never loved me for years and years and years.
And apparently I just ruined his life and he was in misery. So I thought about that.
Is that count as working out? I'll tell you what, it didn't work out.
My marriage to David.
Huh.
God, I'm almost as much as my Kenwa.
Aren't I David?
She's like, well, you know, after a time, it's time to get Tamra Ha! God, I'm almost as much as my quinoa. Aren't I David?
She's like, well, you know, I've decided it's time. It's time to get Tamra hair in my confessional cutouts and dresses that I wear.
I'm a new Shannon.
I got to get rid of this gumbels and 30.
Gumbels and 30.
So she's doing squats and she's like, oh, it's like doing a thrust.
Ha!
Ha!
I'm having so much fun.
Oh, God.
Archi, you watching, Archi.
Ah!
Working out.
Okay, that's one squat done.
All right.
Yeah, her working out is just as fun as you would think it would be. Check. Ha ha ha. Ah, squat one.
Ha ha ha.
Ah, I'm so happy.
This is a great time.
I will tell you this one thing.
I will say the plank is, this plank thing is not my favorite. Like, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, You do planks now right now David David. He's like I'm not David. Am I doing this right? This is a
Plank
God
Love that Shannon's like cracking her up her stuff up with her own, you know cat skills comedy while she's doing the and Kevin's just looking at her
Like she's the fucking craziest person he's ever seen. Yeah, and then she guys
He's like for example free weight and he's showing her how to you know do that squat thing where you lift it up
But I don't even know what you call that
It's like a kettlebell move that normally people do with kettlebells.
So what do I do? Just pull squat and put it up there.
Now, now, Steven, I was in the impression that we'd be having kettle chips, but I guess this is a
kettlebell. I'm not sure if I've all just seen it. And he's just looking at her like Jesus Christ.
Please, let me from this.
It's just like, you know what?
You know what Stephen, like, let me tell you something about me.
I want to lose weight.
I want to be 54 and I want to be healthy.
I don't want my stomachs taking out past my boobs.
I don't want to be healthy and happy.
And I'm not ready to date.
I can't date like this.
Stephen, what am I supposed to do?
And he's like, I'm not getting paid for this. Yeah. I'm not ready to date. I can't do it like this. Even I like what am I supposed to do?
And he's like, yeah, I think I'm not getting paid for this. Okay. Yeah.
So she asked a question. I always ask every time I even move for five minutes. I go how long does this take?
So if I work out every if I do this every day
Planks laughing joking with the people
How long will this take exactly? And he's like, well, you look great as it is. I'm looking for. Oh, David, fake David. How you fix me?
Dream David. 30 to 40 negative calories.
dream, David.
30 to 40 negative calories.
So, uh, so then we go over to Tamer and Eddie, Tamer is like
wheeling herself into a restaurant.
And, um, she's there, the two of them
are meeting up with Shane and Emily for a little
double-date action.
Yeah, I would hate for someone else to get some sick
energy or some sick attention with Tamer around.
Jesus Christ.
Can the man have his heart trouble?
Exactly.
So Eddie is like talking about his heart issues and stuff because I'm
like, oh, what was everything going?
And he's like, well, I can't sprint.
I can't, I can't go hard.
I can't go fast.
And it's like, I'm like, wow, you also can't show any personality.
Yeah. Never he's never been able to. to he's like he's got resting frown face
You know, he's always got a frown on his face and Shannon emily just like uh-huh, okay cool great conversation
Thanks well both our husband sex. I guess let's start some shit, you know
So there's some things I feel like I need to point out here to L internet and it will be happening as this goes on.
But Tara started all of this shit.
Yes, she started it as she always does and she is continuing to start it or to fan the flames
even now when nobody cares. Like she can't get anyone to care. So now she's starting it again.
So she tells us. And before you go into, I know what you're about to go into. So just before you do
that, I just want to say,
Eddie has decided to go off his heart medication.
Always sounds like a good idea to do.
When your heart is not working right,
I think the best thing is just say,
hey, who needs medication?
Let's just see where those beats land, right?
I have to smart move, Eddie, smart.
Yeah, she's like, yeah, if he goes off
it's blood donors, he he's gonna have a stroke and
He won't get Botox, so at least it's the way to keep his face still
Very good. Oh god
So I know that was really sorry everybody with this and by the way, I have to say I was so happy for you
Honestly for us to see Tamara back in her like truly classic, you know, Tamara
State of mind this episode.
I felt like Tamara, we were finally like Jesus Tamara,
finally like stepped out of the room
and we got classic Tamara back.
And I was like, oh, Ronnie's gonna have a field day today.
Yes, classic, satanic, Tamara.
Okay, she's a horrible human being.
And I told you to be getting into the season
she was gonna turn against the B door and here she goes.
So everybody buckle up.
So she's like
I've known Emily for three years and I don't know Shane's and I have no idea what kind of
hat's buttoned here. We're all speculating and it's not fast. So I'm curious to get to know him
and make my own judgments which is like totally Christian and Emily has a look on her face. Emily
should be married to Eddie because they both have so much as farted face Emily is always looking like
Well, she always looks like she's checking our teeth in case they're spinach in there
Oh, okay spinach farts all compromise. She has a finished fart face
She's always doing that thing you know when the after-beats spin-edge your teeth feel like weird.
You know, if you ever like run your tongue over your teeth, the after-beats in spinach and your teeth feel like dry.
Yes.
That's what she's doing. She's like, she is just in a state of spinach.
Like, it's in her teeth. She's filling it like her teeth are dry from it. She's farting spinach.
She's just like, damn it. I have to remind myself not to have spinach because I always do this to myself,
but she keeps having the spinach.
Yeah. She always has that look on her face.
And so, um, they immediately just starts it, right?
So, Tamara's like, so, I heard you through a G-na, and he's like, oh, I asked her to tone it down,
because I got kids, but then I said, take it outside.
And Eddie's like like so shrug.
You get throughout shrug, shrug, shrug.
Yeah.
He's like slabshing off his chair at this point.
His butt is like not even on the chair.
It's just like his lumbar is like on the corner of the chair.
And he's like, okay.
Yeah.
And by the way, you know it's bad news.
When Tamer said, I heard you threw Gina out of your house.
She said it in the exact same tone
as that seminal moment in season three, I think it was,
or maybe four when she turned to Gretchen,
and goes, I heard you went to Bass Lake.
Like when that Bass Lake tone comes out of Tamra,
that's the beginning of a long journey of pain for someone.
You know that Tamra took a look at last season's ratings
and was like, okay, time to be evil again. Yeah, so, and Shane. I'll apologize later, but you know, Iritica look at last season's ratings and was like okay time to be evil again.
Yeah. So and Shane apologize later, but you know, I make it to heaven, but I'm not going to stay on Bravo unless I start some shit.
Yeah. And Shane is like, you know, like you said, Ronnie, he's like, well, you know,
I asked her a few times to be quiet.
And I just sort of snapped.
And but I did not kick her out.
I welcomed her to stop being loud and I'm not just
and to exit.
He welcomed her to exit.
I love that.
That's a good thing.
It's good thing.
He's very sarcastic and people just don't understand.
That's his sense of humor.
My husband loves sarcasm and banter and people just don't
get it.
Yeah.
It's like my wife thinks I'm sarcastic,
but I don't think she really gets it.
I'm serious when I'm telling her to shut the fuck up
and make sure the tells her straight.
Yeah, hey, hey Emily, got spent your jeez.
Oh, damn it Shane.
I thought I got it out.
I think I love fucking with her.
There's no spit itching there.
She like that was sarcasm and he's like, no, it wasn't.
And Tim was like, um, I don't get it. Um, about, you know what?
I'm not scared of you anymore. Shade. And he goes, sorry to disappoint.
She goes, I'm joking. I'm sarcastic. You know, so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so I'm so Exactly. I also felt that because Tamra clearly thought Sarcastic meant that it's like of like a quality of having her like foot in the cast
She's like, yeah, I'm sarcastic. I'm in a cast. So anyway, we then go not sarcastic. You're a bionch. Okay. Yeah
Yeah, my hatred for Tamra. I mean it feels so good because I'm really fueled by rage as everybody knows and I just feel amazing today
I feel like like I've been fueled by rage as everybody knows and I just feel amazing today I feel like I've been reborn in rage so think I know
But it is so thrilling to watch Tamra sturs shit and be evil like watching her like rise from the ashes today and
Finally get back to the business of just being awful was so was such like a rush
I felt like I was alive again because that feels so innocent, right?
But it's not it's like raising to levels of calling somebody's husband abusive, you know?
And also, I'd like to point out that Tamara last week or the week before I said
that this behavior reminded her of Simon, who she's also called emotionally abusive.
So later on, when she's trying to pin the blame on everybody else,
let's just remember that little fact toward, okay, guys.
Yeah.
For now, let's go over to Kelly's house
Where she's hanging out with jolly and jolly is trying to teach her how to mix things in a bowl
Yeah, they're they're basically making brownies and jolly is like, you know You have to put the dry ingredients in first and then add the wet ingredients and Kelly's like how do you know?
How do you know? I don't think that's true? You put it in there. You put it in there. That's not true. Look look
Look look at this look at this box. That's not right, Joey
Now that she's older she has stronger judgment judgment like against me. She calls me out on my shit all the time
You put drawing ingredients in the wet ingredients. That's what you do
You put dry ingredients in the wet ingredients. That's what you do
So they're both learning how to be like semi-poor and stuff because they're living in Becky's old apartment and Kelly Gross
She's like this place. She's like I really love my old friend Becky, but this place is disgusting
Get me out of here. This
1970s hellhole
Poor Kelly. She's like not built for that apartment, especially because all her furniture is Miami and the you know the apartment is like the apartment is truly super super super mid-century
So it is kind of hilarious that Kelly is like cooped up in there. Yeah, and she decides that she's looking for any house
But then we see clips of her looking for any house and man, OC is worse than LA or maybe no not worse but at least as bad as LA and he got those
houses they're looking at and Jolie's calling it you know I guess you could say she's spoiled but
she's they're asking for like four million dollars and Kelly goes yeah look at the view
and she's like of another house like that's not really a view mom. So expensive. So Kelly is getting concerned because she's worried
that Jolie is getting spoiled.
She's had an easy life and everything.
And we see like some, was it like a flashback
or something where Jolie is like,
I gave 200 toys to a homeless shelter
and cause I mean you do that.
I mean you do that.
You didn't do that.
You wasn't you, who's me? Who's me?
It was our fault for spoiling her. I mean she went to camp on a private plane.
What camp has the runway? How did she land at the camp? I understand that you took
off with a camp. How did you actually get there? She just threw on a plane. It
dis me land. He's like, okay, call me when you're home.
So Kelly's going to take Jolie to a soup kitchen to teach her some life lessons.
Yeah. And she's like, and I need to get crowded too.
So,
she's going to go, I'll be afraid for the homeless people. She's just going to throw like a lead at them like you, you get the food.
Maybe you shouldn't eat so much
You're such a little bitch. It's like whoa Kelly you're volunteering
Also, I have to point out something that I loved about this episode is really Kelly hasn't changed at all people have just
Decided to not get mad at everything she's saying yeah, and I'm loving it
It's just a much better way to deal with Kelly,
because Kelly's kind of the hero so far of the season.
Well, and I can't wait for next week.
I mean, we'll get to that.
Oh, God, it's gonna be a second week.
I like, I reround it like 10 times.
Yeah, cause some people online are like this episode sucked.
So boring, right?
What?
This is a good episode.
It's good episode.
And I was like, I thought it was pretty good,
especially when they give you that,
that carrot on a stick from next week.
I mean, that's gonna be gold. No, I thought this episode was good, especially when they give you that carrot on a stick from next week. I mean, that shit is gonna be gold.
No, I thought this episode was good.
It's time for commercial.
It's time for a crapence.
Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter
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But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon.
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How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully
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Vicki and Steve are home and they're that couple. They're just that gross couple.
They got what are we gonna do if we did it? We gonna go out if we did it. We gonna go out and he's like,
well, I don't know, Vicki, we've got chicken defrosted. So I think we're gonna stay home and do that.
Doesn't that sound good?
She's like, okay.
Like, she wants to go to like Qdoba grill or something.
He's like, wow, we got to defrosting chicken.
So you know what they say?
The longer you wait for it to thaw, the longer you're gonna be a me ma
that's like what she's like wait a minute why would you say that I did rig I did rig I need a rig hey are you
are you are we saying hope because you're gonna you're gonna shut for rigging that
chicken is that what's gonna happen are you gonna make me chicken floor it's rigged if you
like that you would have put a chicken on it. So. And then they have this like promotional moment for this wine because the camera like closes,
has like a close up on this label for this like so-and-yum blanc and like called Aldi.
And then Vicki's like, oh, is this that so-and-yum blanc by Aldi?
Like, is this like the priv of wine?
Yeah, Vicki's just earning that change to go by herself or ring
So she's like well, you know what I don't even know if he wants to be married
But I'm a marriage girl look at my figure look at my figure look at my figure. I'm like you cheated on your last husband with Brooks
Okay, yeah
I don't know I don't know Vicki, but she's like well the birthday's coming up. He's like I know Vicki
She's look at this picture. Just look at this picture.
But look at this picture, because I put it on Instagram
and that everybody would say, oh my god,
are you guys engaged?
Because it looks like you're engaged.
And he just shrugs.
He does the shrug like, I roll.
He's like, I mean, I don't know.
We're walking, Vick.
It's a picture of us walking, okay?
It looked more like a print ad for Seattleist to me.
It's just like, like just because you're Vicky
doesn't mean you have to suffer from erectile dysfunction
from your man.
Pretty much.
I mean, it's like watching,
it's like watching one of those commercials of Vicky scene.
It's like, your life will be greatly enhanced,
but you will also suffer from brain damage, stroke,
stomach lining issues and...
But yeah, it's like before you try my oxen, just know that side effects may include screaming at
Thunk O'Night, crimping your hair, asking strippers if they have a job.
Trapping your mother's spirit inside of your kitchen walls.
Calling your best friend's husband gay.
Having sex with multiple partners. Denying sex with multiple partners denying sex with multiple partners.
Being on beds. So he's like, all right, God, I know what you want,
man. Can you say, well, what are you going to do for my birthday?
Because what are we going to do? Then we're going to montage of all the Vicky's sad, sad
birthdays where she's like woohooing yourself. My favorite, which was when she came down
to that red dress that didn't fit her. And nobody was there. And she's like woohooing herself. My favorite, which was when she came down to that red dress that didn't fit her and nobody was there. And she's like, it's me, it's my birthday!
Which one fits? Which one fits? Come on, come on.
Steve's, Steve's like, well, I'm not going to tell you what I got lined up your birthday,
but might have something to do with E Frosting Day, uh, Ikin-J.
Aranade Machae.
Is there anything more exciting than waiting for a chicken to be fully thought? Yes, I will marry Nate you, Vicki gumbelson.
Hey, Vick, I got another salsa jar.
We got to open.
Oh, God.
It opened right on the defrosting chicken.
No, I know it may seem like all of Gina and Vicki do is soft.
Random stores around town.
But it's the only place taking good away from their fucking satanic children, okay?
Yeah.
I don't blame them.
Yeah.
So now we go see Gina at Fashion Island.
And she's like just browsing where and Emily shows up and Emily's like,
sorry, I was driving the test and it ran out of charge.
So, you know, and she's like, oh my God,
that is so orange-cali for a Tesla to run out of battery power.
Don't even realize it, oh my God.
That is how I'll see.
What happened to that warning after I left?
Do I have anything on my teeth? Yes, I had a changed that I had spinach. I didn't even remember eating spinach, but apparently
it's there. You smell that you doubt it honey, that's how it is in Long Island, okay?
In Long Island, you just stick your thinking in there and wait until it comes out, that's what we do.
Well after you left, there was more talk of our business. Like, you know, it had shame,
comes from the place of like a man, you know, you shouldn't talk like that, you know, there was more talk of our business. Like, you know, it had shame comes from the place
of like a man, you know, you shouldn't talk like that.
You know, so Shannon was like,
you shouldn't talk like that to a woman.
Then she said, David might have done that,
you know, talk like to a woman like that.
And like, she got upset for you
because the reminder of David and then on me to clear
that perhaps, you know, perhaps she's right,
perhaps she's not right, you know.
And then, you know, he has kids, so he snaps.
So I get it, you know, maybe he just snaps.
Yeah, maybe he snaps, it's hard.
You know, he has a lot of pressure, you know,
having been once the star of the great mouse detective,
that's like a lot of pressure to live up to all these years,
after later.
So of course he snapped.
And then Emily is like, I just don't like people
having opinions about my marriage
when they don't even know my marriage.
You know, it's like, you're on the real house,
what's on you, if you didn't want anyone to have an opinion about Shan, you shouldn don't even know my marriage. You know, it's like you're on the real house, what's on you?
If you didn't want anyone to have an opinion about Shane,
you shouldn't have gone on the show.
And you shouldn't have married Shane.
If you don't want people not to like that your husband
kicks women out of your house,
maybe you shouldn't let your husband kick women out of the house.
Yeah, exactly.
So now Ellen,
I'm pissed.
What else could I be?
Like they're talking about this with no evidence.
OK, cue the camera please cue the rollback, please
Where she's the one saying that he kicked her out
I think she Chan and was just put it in personal issues on you, which is so oh see a long Island
We just wait you know, it's like a little awkward in issues. That's everybody's got that in the purse
little awkward and issues. That's everybody's got that in the purse.
And Emily like like doing like me think she doth protest too much. She's like um does someone need to be concerned for me? I mean come on, come on, look at me. So happy. Yes, she was look at my
face. I'm like um you look like the whole world just farted on you. Okay. Yes, you look like something strong. Yes, specifically. Yes, you look like you need an intervention,
in terms of like life intervention, or at least a glade plug-in at the very
we're just ascended candle, you know, just something like a vanilla sense,
just to wafed by like you've just been waiting for a lovely scent.
Like maybe a lemon verbena, like you've just been waiting for a lovely scent. Like maybe a lemon verbina.
Like you just need some lemon verbina every month.
I like it, that's so much classier way to put it.
Oh lemon verbina, she's my friend.
So yeah, so basically Gina's like,
you know what, you should tell the other ladies
just to stop talking about your husband.
Just tell them to stop talking about your husband.
I'm like, good luck with that. This group, yeah, not going to happen.
Yeah. So Kelly and Julie arrive at the soup kitchen and Kelly is in the
sweater with a bunch of poles in it. Yeah. She's trying to get rustic.
I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it.
I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like it. I like soup. I, and she, the kitchen's called someone cares kitchen, which I love.
It's such a Kelly Dodd like soup kitchen name like someone cares.
Someone cares, Julie.
No, I care someone cares.
How about we call this this place?
This is your plate.
You bitch.
Why don't you eat up?
Eat up.
Eat up. What were you saying you just wanted to say that? Why don't you eat up eat up eat up eat up
What were you saying you just wanted to say that oh?
I said it. Oh, I was so good at this very good. So she's like this is gonna be fun
Helping people's what life is about
So the ladies like hey volunteers have let's get a started right with. Come on. Let's get some hugs. Yeah.
So they get fruit salad ready and you know, it's actually really cute. It's the I seen it was really it was really cute and Jolie was so good and she was like the
most complaining. I mean, they did a much better job than when like needy and Claudia Jordan tried to serve food to people in need.
So, you know, I get the food was really good.
It looks so good.
Wow. I mean, this is really good advertising for that soup kitchen. I mean, wow.
Yeah. I think I have memory.
Really?
Yeah.
Yeah. Because remember when the real house says it Beverly Hills went to like a soup,
like project angel food and like Kyle Richards was
like throwing like cardboard into like the mashed potatoes
like I think this will help.
It's like no.
Yeah.
Oh, so Jolie leaves and she's like, Mom, that was the best
experience ever and we can come to that every day.
Thank you for such a great life.
Yeah, that was nice.
Yeah, it was cute.
So then we get a close up on pills.
And we're a tamarind mom's house.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, tamarind is like scooting around
on her little scooter still, which is still cracking me up.
And she's like telling her mom like,
head batch, I've been using TBD oils on my leg.
And I was feeling really well.
Say about the age.
She's like, I don't even see BD.
Yeah, CBD.
I don't even see BD. I'm CBB. I don't even see BD.
Like, to be determined.
Yeah, to be determined to fill.
She's like, I don't even smoke pop batch.
And her mom's like, oh, Kim, right?
You feeling better?
You have an X-ray.
You're not going to be surgery.
Don't worry about the CBD.
My new boyfriend smokes the pot.
Yeah, she's like, yeah, I'm dating.
I'm dating a plumber.
She's like, he's really, he's really dating him. I'm dating a plumber. She's like he's really he's really wonderful
He's got this big sexy mustache
But he's always looking for another castle. I'm like what sort of castle do you want? Aren't you here aren't you happy in this castle?
The castle's not always green on the other side of the other castle. That's what I tell him and
Terms like he's a plumber. Well, then why doesn't he get the fuck of a hair bat?
Everything's leaking over here including me.
Yeah, and she's like, well, he does.
He does want to meet you.
He wants to talk to Eddie about what sort of supplements he's going to take.
And Timmer's like, I wish Shannon would talk to me about this stuff.
I was like, that was a hard right in terms of segues.
Yeah, and you can tell that she's totally been talking shit to her mom
complaining about Shannon every day because the mom just keeps rolling her eyes every time she says
the word Shannon. It's like a little button she presses and the mom's like, ah jeez!
Tamara is just looking for something to be annoyed at which is classic Tamara because she's like
you know what it actually makes me sort of bad like she sees the healthy lifestyle that we live
and instead I'm going to get I'm going with her to pick out
Jim McRootman and bring out trainers when she's like she could use our gym equipment. She could use my
trainers like what's up with that? I'm like oh so you're just jealous that she's not using cut fitness
for her weight loss journey. This is like yeah she's not advertising for you for free. This is basically
like the the return of Heather DeBro going on the morning show and not like not like giving a shout out to cut fitness on like good day L.A.
Yes, remember that I got so mad.
I'm refusing to drink skinny girl wine at a party.
Yeah, but instead Tamer's not turning it.
She's not being up front. She's not saying like, oh, I basically I wish Shannon were giving my gym publicity.
She's turning it into like a personal front like I wish you a trust
Man, like it's like an indictment on their friendship as she sit talks her and she's like she was awarded 30 grants a month
And her mom's like he could afford that God. I mean look people get what's coming to him
But I have two sons and I don't want anyone to be like that to my sons. Well, how about your sons don't go fuck around, cheat, get abusive and have the police
called on them and then try and humiliate them constantly on television and social media.
You fun with me.
You know what?
I like you, Sandy, but you did make Tamara.
Okay, so you need to step the fuck off your soap.
Box.
Yeah, this, yeah, this, like, is not nice to do that to the man.
Like, please, and the, and, and Tamra is so misleading
because she's like, yeah, they're making like,
shes, like, they have to pay $3,000 a month.
And then she's like, well, actually, it's only 22.5,
which is still a lot, but like, you know,
she's like happy to lead with sort of like,
not the true facts for.
Yeah, so get her mom to slamsham in a little bit and then she'll bring it down. I'm just happy to lead with sort of like not the true facts.
Yeah, so get her mom to slamshare him in a little bit and then she'll bring it down.
So I'm like, oh, well, that's a, that's a 20 to look what I got a friend I am.
And I'm like, that's so a lot.
$22,000.
I see it's like 22 boyfriends working for five years.
Well, I get this batch mom.
So since he has to pay this, since he has to pay this, it's like, I don't want my name on the utilities.
And she's like, well, that sounds normal, that's fine.
It's like the lack Sandy.
And she's like, yeah, so now they have to pay the utilities
and then shine calls up and it's like,
I didn't have to pay for water.
Like she's like, run a woman.
She doesn't even know about what a batch like water.
They're like, oh my God.
You know, like they're just now just like dumping on Shannon. Yes
I thought it was funny because this weekend I was wasted and went on Instagram and I was so mad at the bottled water
Because you know they're trying you chart your charge for water and I feel like that should be free because it's from God
But I just thought it was very funny that it came back to that like you have to pay for water
What the hell? Oh my god, I've never really felt Shannon like I have this episode.
So the mom's like, well, obviously he took care of her. Yeah, guess what?
Yeah, because she was his wife and she ran his entire family and household.
He got their house built and their fucking kids taking care of it, born, and still raising those kids.
So yeah. And honestly, I could actually, I could in a weird way see that because a lot of,
if you rent a lot of, you know,
a lot of rentals, water is included,
like the landlord pays that,
although I'm currently not in that situation.
Katia, my David.
But, you know, if you always rented
and then like you were in a situation
where your husband just paid all of the utilities
and you just never really saw them. You could theoretically have a not know that
what or something you paid for, although it is kind of shocking. But either way, Tamara
is like doing this woe is me, she's such a good friend and so beleaguered. She's like,
you know, I take a lot with Shannon and there's just like a lot of dumping on me and telling
me what's going on and like a lot of negativity and I get
the fun and I'm just drained.
It's like she asks me anything.
She like, how's Eddie doing?
What's going on?
Have you tried the CBD oils?
How's your island?
Is your island finished yet?
She never even asks Batch.
Yeah, well, maybe it's because you start every conversation off with like,
Gathla Edith doing like, I don't have, I don't believe that Tamara has one second where she's not trying to make something about her
Because I've watched her on the show for years and years and years and I know that she talks about herself plenty now
Well the other hand to be fair even though I think Tamara's a monster from hell
Shannon does get like that. It's just like okay. Here's my friend calling crying again
And yes, this divorce is something to definitely be crying,
Gover, but it has been since Shannon's been on the show.
I mean, it's been pure pain ever since.
And I'm not saying it's her fault.
I'm just saying, we know what that's like.
Everybody has a friend or is that friend?
I've been that friend before where you find so much rely on
and it's like that becomes your shrink.
And they become your crutch.
Unfortunately, your crutch is a brittle old voodoo doll named
tamar barney. Well, I don't know. I mean, I agree. Yeah, obviously Shannon has moments of like,
you know, just like she's she's talking only about herself, but I also think she's going through
like a seriously traumatic experience. And honestly, like you said, Tamara's no better.
Her mom was trying to talk about her boyfriend,
the plumber, and Tamara somehow turns
it into an indictment on Shannon.
Like the plumber, like Sandy is like,
oh well, my plumber boyfriend, you just got a sandwich.
Oh well, I wish I was shadowing my get me a sandwich.
She never got me a sandwich.
So she makes, I feel like Tamara will take something
that's like, she will grasp like Tamara will like take something that's like
Like she will grasp at making it into about herself. Where's Shannon? I feel like
It's she's usually relating something she's going through with what the current topic is, you know Yeah, and also Tamara you might have more time to talk about yourself if you weren't always talking about other people
That's
So over a vikis house
Gina comes over and
Oh my god, it's my birthday. Wow, it's Shadows birthday too. I'm gonna use my new cough gloves
This is great and Gina's great. This is so I'll say
Why they cast a teenager to be on this show. I'll never know, but they did
I don't know. Let's just roll with it. I also applaud Vicky for dressing up like the grapes in fruit of the loom
That was like a great look for her for her birthday. I love it. Marie Abraham's first great role in American pop culture, everybody.
So now and now Tamara, I mean, while it's turning this like this golf day into like a national referendum on Vicki's
personality and she's like, yeah, suddenly V kick in golf. Like, what that come from? She usually dances on bars and now she's golfing.
Like, what's up with that?
I'm like, okay, just like settle down, Tamara.
And by settle down, I mean, keep doing this.
I like it.
Yeah.
And they get in the car for golf and because like,
okay, well, they could do whatever you guys want.
We could do two holes, five holes, 10 holes, 13 holes, 14 holes, 15 holes.
And Tamara's like, I have two holes!
Haha!
Yeah!
Man, it still got it.
Still got it, Tim, or some good old hole jokes.
Well, just, Steve now, so she's morphing into the separate waft.
What happened to Woohoo Vicki?
Woohoo!
That's the one I bought.
Woohoo!
I was like, maybe it's when you spent three seasons killing her soul.
Yeah, exactly. Maybe it was when you drove her into the arms of Steve.
Instead of letting her have a love affair with a con artist.
Did you literally made her so upset that she had to find a band with a conceal and carry permit?
Okay.
Tamara?
Yeah.
Like, literally, the most exciting thing that happened to Vicki all week was that Steve finally defrosse at the chicken.
Okay, like you did this camera you brought this is a frosting chicken into her life. Yes, so on the golf course. You were the one
Tamara. You were the one that caused her to ditch her Keliante sign in the kitchen. Okay, just remember once that sign went out like a part of Vicky went out with it. All right, and it's never coming back.
Yes, there was one month because you know our friend Annabelle's really into crystals
and stuff. And so I'm like, well, maybe I'll try crystals. So I got some. I went to the
crystal store with a couple of girlfriends and I got some crystals. And I was like, oh
my god. And we started doing so well. Like me and like watch what crystals, and I was like, oh my God, and we started doing so well.
Like, me and Ben, like watch what crap,
and it's like, I don't know, like our life just started,
I mean, I don't mean many well.
I just mean like living like our tours started,
and we've just been so fucking happy over here.
We're like too happy little bugs in a rug, okay?
And then I was vacuuming, and I moved to Crystal,
and we had one month where they're like,
oh, you didn't make any money
This like on your ads. It's like something weird happened with us and I was like, oh my god
It's my crystal and so I moved to crystal back and now I'm happy again. Oh, I hate to not being brainwashed by this stupid shit
I believe everything I see on TV
Yeah, well, we'll have to get you a cullion design just so that's my point
Yeah, well, we'll have to get you a Cullian Design just So that's my point.
One Cullian Design. It doesn't mean it doesn't seem like it would mean much, but you cannot just be changing the fun sway.
Remember that Shannon's divorce happened right after that psychic told her that her relationship spot was where the toilet was.
Yeah, you know, you're right. You're right. You're right.
I should I should check my home to see make sure all my things way is all right. I think my thanksway is probably saying like, like, eat more.
I think that's what my thanksway is telling me right now.
I want to do this eat.
So Emily, meanwhile, Emily's thanksway I think says walk slowly because everything she's
always like, everything is so slow.
She's like walking through her home to go out to the car and she's like
She's like, you know, I'm still really upset that they're talking about like that Shannnam is saying stuff about Shane
I'm like just please walk through the door. You've been like drifting towards it for two minutes now
She goes through the door and get into the car be upset more quickly
So she gets in there and she oh, yeah, she like, it's not fair to compare us because like, listen, she's divorced and their relationship with
Stomolts was, and I'm married. And we're like really happy. So the other day, the
other day, he, uh, he made a, like, uh, an appointment on our Google doc, uh,
calendar, uh, the point one was, uh, get pot holders. And I feel like that was so romantic.
He left me a note that said shut the fuck up or get out. You know, it's like
important. It's like the notebook. He emptied out a jar of manays on the
island and said clean it.
So Tamara is on the golf course. We are having so much fun. Right.
Girls, you can get drinks on the golf course. We are having so much fun. Right girls.
You can get drinks on the golf course.
Bad.
Yeah.
Tamara tries to like, tries to hit the ball.
She's like, you know, she's being joking, right?
Because she's swinging.
She misses, but then she does that whole thing.
Like, uh, bad.
I can't stop twirling around.
I'm like, you have a broken foot.
OK.
Like you don't do this right now.
Sit down.
Take a seat and watch and watch everyone else.
Yeah, I notice she's in much more pain when there's someone with a more serious disease around her.
Yeah, exactly. So the girls all arrive and Gina's like, oh my god, I haven't been
coughing. It's the past time for the older generation I feel. Okay, and when she's celebrating Bingo on out, I swear to God, I out.
God for the older generation.
She says on the show, it's either like how Long Island is so different or she's so much younger than everybody else.
Yeah, like she's like shocked by everything.
Pickles. Oh my God.
I don't eat pickles.
That's like so California, like like in long island we cucumbers but
she they pickles like what's that in long island the pickle comes on the side
of your sandwich and it's in the spear shape here it's on your sandwich and it
circles in long island we have carrots and here they have posnips I'm like oh my
god that's so californianips, like what is that?
So Shannon gets there and she's wearing the shirt that says,
I'm not the cart girl.
Oh yeah, I didn't even notice that.
Well, guess what?
I'm not the cart girl,
so you can look elsewhere, David.
Ha!
This is the do me, I'm not a cart girl!
Oh, I'm sorry to disappoint you, David.
I guess you'll have to find some other flusy that it up there with so they separate into different golf carts and Shannon's in one with Emily and who else Gina is a
Gina and she's like, can I drive? I'm a great driver. Yeah, Kelly and then Tam was like, I brought brought lice ira and she has like, thanks man.
So Vicki's driving the other one and she is acting like a different Vicki.
She's like, we're gonna go very, very slowly because that's like how we do it.
That girl.
And Tamer and Tamer is like, what's up with Vicki?
She's like, now that she's with Steve and the frosting chicken all the time,
there's just like driving all prim, proper with both hands.
Like, that's ridiculous.
I'm like, excuse me, Miss Glamas, Doomsdiz,
Asher Driver. Okay. At least she didn't like cause you guys all to go to the
hospital by rolling down a dune. Yeah, no kidding. You almost killed everybody.
And they refused to come see you in the hospital. So. And Shannon's being
goofy. Did she go to the hospital? Maybe she did go to the hospital.
I forget.
I don't mind it.
But yeah, whatever.
You almost murdered half the cast last year, OK?
Yeah.
So Shannon's being goofy.
She's like, look at me.
I'm just driving.
Being crazy.
I'm so happy.
Hi.
I mean, Tamara is in the other world.
The band is hot.
What is that?
A Brad Pitt.
I'm driving right into it.
I sense it, blah!
Ah!
Ah!
Here, I shot him a door killed by hilarious times
in a golf court.
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Oh, what's the bomb call?
Bye, bye, birdie.
Ah!
Ah!
Ah! I wish I could be an eagleie. Ah! Ah! Ah!
Wish I could be an eagle scout.
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Hey, Tamara, what's your handicap?
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Well, I guess this is just sort of par for the course.
Ah!
Ah!
Ah, don't mind me.
I'm just puttering around.
Don't be an A-holed one, Tamara!
Ah!
Ah! Ah! Ah! I wish I could listen to some music from David Bokey
Ground control to major golf course
Her pungus are getting really bad. Oh, so Tamra's watching her drive around all men I clean
She's like what is she event doing? That's not event fun
of men, uh, menically, and she's like, what is she event doing? That's not event fun.
Yeah. I love that sort of jealousy. Again, flash back to
Tamra, as they all go tumbling down and do it in
Atlanta.
In a giant car that could kill them all. And because like,
she's just showing off, she's just showing off now. And
then Shannon's like, I know about cough. There's some
woods and some metal, some metal pieces.
What are those sticks?
Well, the best part about Kof is that it comes with a wedge, wedge salad blue cheese.
And Kelly's being hilarious.
Kelly's like, could be understated hilarious while on that.
Because she's like, James, yeah, I'm gonna be on her team.
This girl suck.
Well, I also like Kelly was like, yeah,
I've been playing golf.
I've been playing golf since I was like third grade.
I was like third grade, like I play golf.
I play golf.
I was like see, Sakachina,
that's not for the older generation.
She's been playing it since she was eight years old.
Yeah, well maybe they like to it. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, they do it in Arizona, but that certainly not had to do it in Long Island
So the car
Okay, gotta get her out of there. She has no part of Gina. No, so
The car girl comes rolling up and so they all start getting drinks and it's like you know
Just high jinks like they Vicky I hit the ball Vicky did it like and they're drinking bloody
marries and champagne and stuff like that and Vicky's like oh my god oh my god I'm
drunk I can't even think I'm drunk right now I could just went to my head and I
just feel dizzy I forget the spins like oh my god oh my god so Tamra's brought
along all these breath of life I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel like I feel So Shannon is like oh wow look at that guy over there golfing. I don't know if he's cute
I'm not sure about facial hair. So Kelly's like hey
Let's go on to love your single
I like your beard. I like a beard
And he's like oh I have a girlfriend. Okay. He's really serious as golfers are and then as he's a little bitch
He swings and she goes,
head straight.
She starts cracking up.
So good.
So now they're like traveling again and Shannon is like driving off the path and like being loud
and these and Vicki's just getting mad. But now Vicki's drunk. So she like blows the,
now she blows the breathalyzer and she's a point one four. So she's now
Officially drunk and chatting meanwhile she blows it and it comes in as a point oh nine. I'm like ah
0.09 that's nothing. That's like mouthwash. I'm like 0.08 is a D.Y. So I know but a point eight a point 0.08 is not very much
They keep lowering that fucking thing every year
They're that said do not drive do not get get a D. Why I take Cooper's even,
even if I can take a new bird,
you guys can take a new bird.
But still that's some bullshit.
0.08.
So Shannon's like,
Beach, I got a 0.09.
Yes, who is woohooing now, bitch.
Yeah.
So, so now like,
it's just more,
now now Emily starts to drive the car.
So she's driving and then Vicki and just more, now Emily starts to drive the car, so she's driving,
and then Vicki and Tam are just like flopped down on the grass, because they're drunk, and
they're tired, and Kelly's hitting putts.
And I like everything's like fun, fun, fun, and then all of a sudden, Emily's like,
um, so Shannon, um, so I heard that you think that I'm going to abuse her relationships,
so, and she's like, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh, huh,, I mean, what, David, is there sure in this?
Is this a sketch?
Is this a sketch?
Oh, I just want to talk about that.
I'm just going to have a nacho.
Oh, I wanted to talk about that.
Who said the word abuse?
You think after my history, I would use the word abuse do not put words in my mouth sweetie
And Emily's hurt for chose details
Mm, and Emily goes I I heard your marriage was raw
But and she is well. I said I had to walk on excels around David. That is what I said just well
I just mean we need boundaries. Um, like,
if you have a problem, you need to just talk to my husband about it, which, okay, yeah, tell
your, tell your girlfriend to go fight with your husband. Sounds great. How about you reign in
shame? How about you? Yeah, exactly. Very less of a piece of shit. Okay. I'm not gonna sit here and,
like, have you sticking up for that asshole? Exactly. And she's like, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what,
what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what,
what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what,
what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what,
what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what,
what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what,
what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, to yell at your friends, you know, be respectful, which it wasn't cool, Emily, and there's
not going to be any changing of that, okay?
It doesn't matter how people talk about it after.
Yeah, exactly.
Well, yeah, exactly.
So now, you know, there's more high-jank speakers on the ground.
Tamer's just like pouring Cheetos down her throat, And they decided to move over to the 19th hole
for some food.
They sit down and say, oh my God, but varying pretzels.
Well, give me a journal, because I'm gonna be
a varying, huh?
Three pretzels, please.
So they're having, they get birthday drinks in the back.
Paisal.
Paisal.
These ladies crack me up because they're getting drinks in there. Oh, amazing day. Oh, yes, yes. Oh, yeah, it was so bad. Best birthday ever. Yes, that's amazing.
All right. So can I ask you the question? Who put the word abuse? The same sentence as
Shannin Bittor. And furthermore, is anyone else gonna be getting the sounds of the border with the dressing on the side?
And then Emily is like, you put the award abuse in the situation, Gina. And she's like, I never said that.
I said, after you left the situation, Brock got brought up again. And she's like, did so you told her that I thought?
I said, no, I told you you said it was something that David would do, which is all true so far.
And she goes, then why did she think? Well, maybe she was just trying to project it on to you that's what I
said like maybe you were projecting your own problems on to her and she says well I was doing that
and I said it and then Vicki goes oh so so Ebbley are you a liar she's like no whoa what are
lies just oh so there's you Gina huh you're You're lying, huh? Oh, I never said that. I never said that.
Because of course Gina messed with Vicki. So now Vicki will take any chance she gets to
try and blame something on Gina.
Yeah, so then, so of course, Tamara's like, batches, I think this is all a big huge misunderstanding.
I'm like, I hate that you're the voice of reason, but I also hate that you're the one who started
this mess in the first place.
Yeah, it's the came of telephone. I'm like, yeah, and you're the one on it.
Tamara. Yeah, exactly.
So that's a really strong word to abuse.
Like, Vicki's really trying to cement Gina as a villain, but no one will listen to her.
So everybody's saying, Tamara's like, okay, fine, then who abitinated the word abuse?
And Kelly's like, it's all Vicky's fault
Yeah, she's like Emily told me that about her and I don't think I don't think she didn't say that she didn't want to see that
No, well they showed the clip okay, so
Gina goes I never said that and Tamer goes who originated the word abuse and then Kelly says well
She told me about that she thought that about her.
And I said, I don't think she had to said that.
And then Emily said, did she say my husband was abusive?
And then the in the clip, Emily's like, did she say my husband was abusive?
And Kelly says, yes, she said she was worried.
But I think she just, I mean, no one, I think they showed her.
I'm saying yes, but Emily was the one who said the word abuse.
But this is also nitpicking so much because like anyone could abuse could have been mentioned like under someone's breath.
Like, like, it's it's not really no one's saying that Shane is like abusive.
Shannon just, Shannon Basley said it reminded her, mind it up.
Shane reminded her of her time with David.
And then everyone else is like saying like abusive or what I don't know
It's like it's so like over the top. It's so ridiculous and the fact that it's like not being squashed
It's almost hilarious. So finally Emily and Gina go off to talk separately because Gina's like you know what can we talk?
Can we talk or maybe Emily said it so they step away and while they are walk stepping away
Shannon Shannon's great. I love this. She leans forward and she's like
Tamra you're the one who brought Emily up at canners and yet I'm being chastised
Even playing me don't even fucking play me on me
Shannon beddur
But Shannon's right because of course Tamra is the one who started starting the pot and Shannon's the one
Makes an off-hand comment and she's the one who gets who gets it my favorite. I don't know if you heard Kelly
Did you're killing the background she goes it was Ricky's fall
That was I thought she was saying it's Vicki's fault. Oh, I thought she said Ricky
Maybe she said Vicki either way works. We'll take either way either verse works. And yeah, and it was
Tamra who's Tamara. They've shown Tamra in like four or five scenes going to
different people's house, bring you them. Yes. Okay. She brings up every time she
can. She's like, so I heard you throughout Gina or like to everyone. I just
would hear that like shing throughout Gina. Like she's brought up every single time.
Yeah. No one even really cares except for Tam. Yeah, and she and Tamara's like well
I didn't say that you're married sucks because you remind her wait, what'd she say? I didn't say you're married sucks
Because you reminder of David you said that and she goes Tamara
I did not accuse you of saying anything. She's you just did and kill is like yeah, you just did
I mean you kind of did just do that. I'm not gonna
Do you live when Shannon gets gaslit?
It's the best
They don't tour every fucking season they do it my
Sousa the border hasn't been arrived yet and you're gonna ruin it for me
I'm not my case
So then Gina and Emily are over there talking this watch it again
You have to believe me. You have to believe me. I'm on your side. I'm doing everything for you
This is for you listen because you're gonna get a lot worse than I'm gonna get it. Okay. I'm doing it for you
I've got nothing in this. I'll take it for you. I'll take it
But I'm doing it for you because friends, okay?
And then Emily gets cold and she's like, yeah, there is more in it for me because your
husband's never home, so you don't have to deal with this. I do. You know, my husband
cares about me, you know, okay, you know what? You know what? Okay. She does that thing,
which is like, okay, I'm gonna like scowl, shrug my shoulders, look down and say, you know what?
Okay. That's really, you know what? That's foul. That's foul. That's a reference to baseball, which is, which is a game for
the younger generations, okay?
She's like, I'm not going to take any more of this dribble. Okay. That's
biscuit ball. Okay.
I want to give love. Okay. I'm not going to, I'm not going to deal with your
slap shots. Honky. Listen here, your hungry hippo. Okay.'m not going to I'm not going to deal with your slap shots honky. Listen here, your hungry
hippo. Okay, we're going to go
a little bit. I'm going to get
to know. You know what? You
know what? Yeah, you know what
Tic Tac toe, okay? This is all
tidily weeks to me. You know
what this is? You know, I'm going
to capture the flag, okay? And
the flag is
So then back at the table
Shannon is pacing around saying she's gonna leave and then coming back and going
And then Kelly's like oh great you made her upset now look what you did
Tim wrong. I love it. I love the way Kelly talks about Shannon like
I love it. I love the way Kelly talks about Shannon.
Like, she's like a low level Hulk.
Like, look, you got her mad.
Dr. Bruce Bann is mad now.
Thanks, she's thanks, Tamara.
That was awesome.
Oh, I'm gonna do that.
Oh.
How could you do that?
Oh, I'm like, oh, no.
He's saying, I'm like, oh, no.
It's always my fault, that's, I'm like, it literally is, okay.
Yeah, it's like that enough shit going on in my life
and they're drawing me into their drama.
In terms of like, because you made a comment,
she's like, I made a comment and I own it.
It's like, it's a tamara.
Oh my God, this is where I start getting matched.
She goes, tamara goes, you know what?
When someone talks about your husband,
it's fucking hotthaw.
I'm like, like, and they like cut to Vicky I think. I'm like, and they cut to Vicky, I think.
And like, you realize they give Vicky the symbol cut
where they cut to Vicky and it goes,
sss.
Yeah, exactly.
And it's like, you realize, Tamra,
that you spent like several seasons talking about Brooks, right?
Like, like, not only Brooks, I mean, there's Jim Belino,
there's her own husband.
She wasn't too nice about David at times.
Yeah, let's think of every husband that's been around. She's talked shit about every single person's husband. Diko
She said wanted to just be another housewife.
Yeah, let me see because there's like a
Sure, she says it's a very she called. Yeah, she said someone's husband was like a homo in one of the earlier seasons.
So, yeah.
Shut up.
Oh, you know what?
How about that time you tried to break up Gretchen?
And well, I guess her Gretchen's husband died.
But the point is that Tamra suddenly is talking about boundaries or understanding these things.
And she is probably the one who's the most guilty of doing this.
Yes. She's as usual, big as hypocrat.
So she's trying to deflect and Kelly comes in to stand up and she's like, listen girls, Shannon has been through a lot.
She would never say something like that.
Stop it. Stop it. You guys need to find some people who haven't
taken a bath in a while and give them some cornedos because you're not grounded.
So, um, so meanwhile, uh, Gina and Emily sort of like bury the hatch, but they're fine. They
really are fine. They're like, they're, they're fine. They make some jokes about putting it to bed
and like, let's put this baby to bed. Let's put a pacifier in the baby. Let's put that but you know
They're they hug and everything's good and meanwhile
Tamara and Shannon is just getting worse and worse
Tamara's like when someone goes out there. How's it?
You got that fat. You got that fat.
And Shannon meanwhile is like I apologize to Emily and she chose to attack me on the golf course
And you know, she attacks you. Really, Shannon.
Shit, it attacks you and he's like,
yo, she's such a nice boundary.
He's all.
And Vicky's like, doesn't really matter
that Shannon has an opinion on Shane.
No, that's my question, that does matter.
Like, you don't have a retirement plan
and I can probably fix that.
Okay, get a job.
Get a job.
Get a job.
Get a job, mom.
For a, okay.
For a, okay. For a, okay. And we what K, for a what K, okay, okay.
And if we're gonna say how this fight is,
she just fought, how dare she?
This is by sandbox, okay?
I've got a for what K on the sandbox, okay?
You guys sandbox, like Lil' Brandon's got a sandbox too.
Like we have two sandboxes and it's like,
I pay for my dog.
I just want my sandbox back.
This is a Vicky Cuffell said,
historical sandbox, brought to you by Vicky Guffa said
that's a thing. So then Shannon's like listen just don't put me in the middle of
Gina and Emily like I probably know these two bitches. And time was like you know
what when you have a husband that you love and you don't love with and you have a
good relationship like a real relationship not a bad one for 17 years like when
someone goes after that person it's's like facking game on and challenge
just like seeing red because it's, you know,
because now she's just in her entire marriage.
What I'm.
Yeah, and she has like, I didn't go after him.
Hmm.
Yep. Well, we told you Shannon.
We told you.
Yeah.
We told you on the show and we told you to your face.
Tamara is evil beaver and she will never be a true friend to anybody.
Exactly.
So ultimately, you know, Shannon's like, Tamara, do you understand what I'd go through
every single day with my not free tap water and with my husband?
And you're going to sit here and do that.
Tamara's like, this is so typical of that batch challenge.
She's so good at making situations bad herself.
What about everyone else?
Like you literally made this all about her
and it was about Gina and Emily.
Literally waited for the season to start shooting
for your husband to go to the hospital
so the entire first episode could be about you.
Fuck off.
But thank you for being evil again. Yeah, thank you. I was so excited. I was like, I was like,
oh my god, Tamras, Tamras evil again. She's gonna start shit and we're finally gonna get our
OC back. Oh, I haven't been angry enough lately. I've been so happy and it really feels good to
have some hate, you know, just blowing through my veins. So thank you. I know. Well, I feel like,
I feel like my hate is just going to like,
I feel like this is a good primer for hate,
and then like, you know,
and then like, like, I guess, with today's Tuesday,
so we have like, below deck tonight,
and I feel like,
Jowaw was just going to take my hate,
and just like, take it to the next level.
I'll be just so thrilled.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, thank God.
Well, thank you, Brava, for all you give us to love hate.
Everybody, thanks for being here.
We will be back tomorrow with Bolo Deck.
And go over.
This is the last week.
You can get the Gar shirts over at WatchUpCrapins.com.
That's also where you will find ticket links to our live shows coming up.
We have September in Denver, October two shows in New York at the Grammar C.
So come to that.
We've got November in Seattle and December in Nashville, and that will round us out for
the year.
So get over the CS before 2018 is over.
Please.
Please.
Thank you everybody.
We love you.
We'll talk to you next time.
Thank you guys.
Bye. Hey, prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download
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