Watch What Crappens - RHOD: Smashing Bumpkins

Episode Date: September 20, 2018

It's time for the Real Housewives of Dallas to get their anger out by smashing stuff. Someone's gonna get hurt. This week's bonus episode is about our trip to Denver. To hear it, become a Patreon member at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. ***New Limited HEY BETCH tees through September at crappensmerch.com! **Crappens Live is coming to Denver, NYC, Seattle and Nashville! Find ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Oh, when you go to the river, you can't just go, have this hurt there so much that it happens. Watch what crapens would like to think it's premium sponsors. Ashley Chivoni, she don't take no baloney. Pristie Wawardy-Dawardy.

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Avadigila Weber. and our super premium Patreon subscribers, Savannah, it's my birthday month, Cookraft, Heligrand, Big Grant Master, The Incredible Edible Matthews Sisters, and Lizzie Drucker, a fun mother f- We love you guys. Hello, and welcome to Watch What Crafted, and the podcast about all that crap we'd love to talk about on Geo Bros. I'm Ronnie Caram, and here I am with my gorgeous little friend in co-host, Mr. Ben Maddlecare. Hello, Bean.

Hello, Ronnie, how are you today? I'm doing so good. I'm just glad to be here glad to be alive glad mother So glad to be here. I'm just glad to be separating my company from my mother mother So it is real housewives of Dallas day everybody. We have sold out Dallas. Thank you to everybody who's coming It there's a lot more of you that want to come and didn't get tickets Let us know on Twitter Instagram or our Facebook group Watch what crap ends live and loving it Because if there's a demand for more, I mean why not we'll do another one

But we don't want to like schedule another one and then you know like 30 people show up Yeah, we don't it's like yeah, like we have to make sure there's like a real like like really like we have to Real we have to feel it, you you know we have to feel it that you guys want us to do another show in Dallas but you know but no big deal and also by the way as you know as we mentioned earlier this week the first New York show I'm sorry the Friday night New York show is sold out but our Thursday night show still has some tickets left and we are we talking about real house was a Dallas that night Which is great because we just went we did a Denver show last week and we did real house was a Dallas and

My oh my as we've probably already mentioned like a billion times already this week like that was such a fun show and doing Dallas live is so fun because these women are and doing Dallas Live is so fun because these women are crazy as we are about to see, as we jump into this episode. And so Dallas is actually turning into one of my favorite live shows that we've done. Could we've actually done a few Dallas Live shows? And they're just, they're great.

These women make for a great live show. Yeah, so come check that out. And then next month, yeah, next month is New York City. So get your ass to that people. And then following that, in November, we month is New York City. So get your ass to that people. And then following that in November, we're gonna be in Seattle and then December, we are going to be in Nashville, city and music. That's right.

And Nashville, by the way, is also selling at a very steady, reliable clip. So I would also like keep an eye on that one because if you're thinking about going to Nashville, I actually think that one, I think that one's gonna sell sell it too to be honest. So go get your tickets. Okay, everybody.

Now let's get on to some real housewives of Dallas. Oh my God. What a great episode. I don't know. I don't know how you felt about it, but I was sitting there laughing the entire time. I was like, this is why I love Dallas. This is why I'm so excited for the people. This is not to be like a shiller or anything, but we have a lot of people who are like, well,

I don't really watch Dallas, but I like marathon did for, to get ready for the Denver show, or some people are saying that they're going to start watching it in anticipation of the New York show. And I'm like so happy for you, because I watched this episode, and I'm like, this is such a good show. It is so funny. This is like varsity level housewife. This is why we do our podcasts.

Yeah, and it doesn't have the best ratings, which sucks, because it makes us laugh every day, I'm time. I mean, look, this just starts off with Waterfountain's time to pop music, okay? Let's go into the Bellagio. Yeah. It's like the Dallas Bellagio Waterfountain Pop. Yeah, it's like, it's Velagio water fountain pot. Yeah, it's like it's so fancy.

What a fancy show. It's like going to go into the Bellagio and then walking around and taking photos and a boomerang of those fountains and you're like, look at me. I was somewhere special and that's how I feel when I watch the show. I was somewhere special. Well, this is how I feel when the show tram goes straight from water fountain pop at the balladio to baby hell circus circus because it's like fun fun fun and then it's like yeah is every fucking episode gonna start off with Brandy's baby crying what the fuck I feel like I feel like I'm being baited I know for a moment

I thought I was watching last week's episode I was like wait a second we're starting with crying again I was like joy am I watching the right episode? It is my DVR set, right? It is. It is to extend the metaphor. It is truly like you are in the Uber, heading to the Bologio, and then you look down to your phone to check text, and you have arrived at the Golden Nugget.

And maybe not even the Golden Nugget. You're not even in Vegas anymore. You're in Laughlin, Nevada at that point. Can I say it, Laughlin? You're in Primm. That's easier for me to say. You're in Prem. That border town. You know that border. Yes. Or you're just at that casino, that shitty casino that's like

castles and stuff. What is it? Excalibur. Yeah, Excalibur. And then you walk in and you're like, I just wanted to play a nickel machine. Why does everything smell like shit? You're not even there. You're at Marongo. Okay. Like you went the wrong direction. You went towards Palm Springs and you run to put Marongo. And there's Randy. It's a little Marongo in here.

It's getting a little Marongo in here. We got a little Marongo happening over there. Yeah. It's like the Marongo casino of a phone. Yeah. And he said, Brandy. Well, she's wearing the outfit for it. It's like the, the, the social workers are coming over and she's wearing this like blue dress with a next scarf thing. What do those call those?

It's like a collar that I don't even know what to say guys. You know, my it's not a scarf, but yeah, like some bizarre thing. Look, why would you wear a casino outfit to be a social worker why are you holding your cocktail tray Brandy why are you like in a bunny outfit they're just like the the morongo music is just playing all the way in the like everywhere like you know that you know they're you know their music Duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh duh music. Yeah, that's before they rebranded. I mean, they're still casino morongo, but then they were like, you know what? Get rid of that singer. And let's just have it be like, done, done, done, done, done, done, done, done. It was like, it was like someone composed music for like a laser show that was going to be like, it was going to be like the Ozarks or something like that. You know, like, there was going to do, they're going to go sent, like, create a laser show down in like Missouri. And then they're like, you You know, like there was, they were gonna do, they were gonna go send, like create a laser show

down in like Missouri. And then they're like, you know what, we ran out the budget. And someone's like, well, we have this music. Let's sell it to Marango. Marango's like, we'll take some laser music. We'll make that our, we're gonna build our entire marketing campaign around laser music.

But guess what, no lasers. Unfortunately, because they could aim on it brandy and set that baby up. So, yeah, so brand, once again again the kids are like terrorizing the kitchen and Brandy's holding the brew and then she's like I'm gonna You guys have to make your own lunch boxes because I have to visit with a social worker. They're like that's your job mommy I like that. They're little saddened but doors get their little Shannon Bedouards.

That is your job. Brandy Brandy? Here's my Brooklyn. Here's my is Brooklyn Brandy's daughter killed by having to make her own bunch. You're ready to 40 negative thoughts. Uh oh, no, they're turning into hyper thoughts. Clay just had a whole bag of Sarah patch kids. You mentioned this in your last recap, but what does she do? Just fill all the bottom shelves with processed food.

Geez. Could you give these chance of kids to not have diabetes too by the time they're 10? Okay. They're sitting there, like putting their hands in the icing, you know. And did you notice that Brooklyn licks finger, licks icing off her middle finger

and gives her mom the finger so good? I didn't even notice, because at this point I'm just like turning away. I just feel like, what is this like Sodom and Gomorrah? Was that where, was that, was that where lots of wife turned around and turned into a pillar of salt? Was that Sodom and Gomorrah? Was that a different town?

Oh, I remember. Whatever that place was, whatever that awful place was. Yeah, you're like just keep your eyes open through Sodom and then close them during Gomorrah girl. I feel like it was a different town, but either way, I just was like I was starting to feel I was feeling like I was turning into salts and so I was like I'm just gonna like look down on my notes and just listen I'm not gonna look I'm not gonna look at what the children are doing.

Well, if you had turned into salt, Brandy could grind you all over something and feed it to her goddamn kids. Okay. She's like, so do you even sugar? So these kids have now actually turned the corner from hyperactive to evil. And believe it or not, I actually like them being outright evil because they were just like,

Brooklyn was like, basically she was like, if the social workers might take away Bruin, if we lie, I was like, that is so evil. And the enemy of my enemy and all that. Well, I just kind of feel like that shows so much initiative. Like good for you, little girl. Now you're you're channeling your your frenzied activity into something productive. Yeah, ruining brand these life. That kid's going to be the next full full cast member on this show. She really will be.

the next full full cast member on this show. She really will be. So the, the, um, yeah, so she's like, well, we're gonna tell them you don't pay any attention to us. And you're always on your stupid phone. And then talk to James Mercer and his, his helper, whatever, I think I got your name, sorry. I don't know why I needed to write down Dr. James Mercer, but there he goes. His name was? I didn't even know they had names. Yeah, I was like his own Kyron. And I was like, wow.

Wow, I treated them sort of the way. Brooklyn treated them when she opened the door for them. They knock on the door. And Brooklyn goes up to the front door, opens it and just walks away. Like, so I was just glad it wasn't babies. I was glad it wasn't too tiny screaming babies at the door like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's like the first dialogue we've had in a brandy scene. I was afraid it was gonna be someone with a wheelbarrow full of twizzards. They were just gonna dump in the floor or be like, eat these kids and Swedish fish. So, so Brandy's like, last time the social workers came, it was like a bit of, uh, it was a bit of a scene. And we see a flashback and we see Brooklyn go, mommy's favorite drink is wine, which made me roll over laughing. This was like the first time that her kids made me laugh instead of

pull out my hair. I was like, oh my God, these kids are being so funny today. I know she was like in full throw under the bus mode. Yeah. Because then in this one, Randy's like, I know I'm an amazing mother, but if anything is misinterpreted, like that little wine comment,

I could lose my baby, where? And so the doctor's like, so how's life with the new baby? And the lady says, yeah, when he cries, do you see them? She's like, oh yeah, I pick him up. And up and she goes well how do you calm them down come with the way she calm them down and she says I hold him we're taking free walk and Brooklyn's like that's not a real walk it's just down the driveway so now Brooklyn has turned

into Kelly Dodd she's just tackling her bitch. You're a little bitch social work. I'm sorry you mom I welcome to the pond and back up there. We don't even have a pond Well, we also like to read together some days I read maybe two books a day to him, and they're like, I wouldn't go that far. I find that hard to believe. Now she's the way out. Oh, really? Really, mother? I find that hard to believe. What do you read?

Packages on what they write on the back of a crackerjack box? Ah! Who cares if she's reading books? I'll tell you this much. My mother does not support other women. Wow, mother. Wow. Wow. Wow.

Like, seriously, like, like, Whitney Bucks always under Bruin, like, he's like a child. He doesn't even know what you're saying. Like, like, you could be like, Google, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, he'd be like, that's a great book. Like, I don't see it, like, I don't get it. Like, literally kill me now, mom.

Like, kill me now. You want to hand sandwich? Make a goddamn hand sandwich? Make it God can't hand sandwich. Did you read, ruin my book? What's left behind? God forbid Tinsley gets left out. She's like, she's like, oh my God, mom, you have my babies. My eggs. So then they ask about Brian, they're like, so this husband that you keep saying that you have and she's like, oh my God. He's so into it, he's obsessed.

Let me back in about a year and a half or so. He travels a lot for work. Yeah, he's so obsessed. So then we go to Cameron. It's in them it's like 3am or 4am or something. Her kids are eating cereal and it's like dark out. And she is leaving because she has had to Orlando for the Global Patexpo. And so she's an expo.

I have to go to the global pad expo because a lot of distributors there. So she's nervous, she's FaceTime in court. She's like, I nervous and he goes, why? It's like thanks, Quartz. Thanks for that support. He's like, have confidence in yourself. Ugh.

And she's like, Quartz has made it very clear. If I don't find it disturbed. This is the unsparkled dog. Sparkled dog has a booth at the global paddock spell. Did you catch it? She was telling the kids, okay, kids, it's time to go. I think I have everything. think I have everything except for the kids. Some dumb blondes pack some things smart blondes pack everything. She's like this is work instead of a trip. So I'm fine commercial. And

I don't know how to do it. How do you fly a commercial? Do you like call up the energizer bunny and be like, I like your commercial. Can I fly on it? Like how does that work? Do you get to choose your commercial? What if I get stuck with Fred Flintstone? Really don't like him. What if I have a DVR and I don't get to see commercials anymore?

Do I still get to fly commercial? It's hard. Has anybody here ever really gauged the comfort of a trisket? The Sandy Duncan, the she flies in Peter Pan, but does she fly in her own commercial? Sorry, that's wheat then. I'm sorry, I just really botched that one. You know, we've done that for years. We've done that for six years now.

We keep putting Sandy Duncan in the wrong commercials. We are, we are, we quietly have an ongoing Sandy Duncan joke that's never really been acknowledged by us or the listeners. And so one time Sandy Duncan's, I think daughter-in-law contacted us. It was like, it's not, it's, it's not, it's wheat fence. It's not trisket or whatever. Are you serious? Yeah, it's a long time ago back when we always made sandy who had a glass eyes someone look like they had a glass eyes We can call him sandy dunk. Oh, I Don't know who had a glass eye. I mean I don't know. We I mean there's we we have managed to bring sandy dunking into our podcast

Quietly many, many times. Well on a network full of Peter Pan, so can you not? I know. Hey guys, yeah, she dead joke for the day. So Cameron, technically she didn't say this is not a trip. She said, it's not a vacation, which maybe laughed because I just like the way she said vacation. Vacation. I get my, yeah, she was checking with Clare. vacation, which maybe Lat left because I just like the way she said vacation vacation.

I get my, yeah, she was checking with Clare. A court. She was like, I get my bags before I get the car, right? No, you drive your car into the baggage claim. Yeah, exactly. They'll have the bags waiting at her. I get that she's like too rich to ever have done it, but hey, you weren't, I mean, haven't you seen people do it? You have to pass the bag that's claimed to get outside, you know? Yeah, yeah. It's like it's pretty, you can, and worst case scenario, you just,

the flow, the flow of the airport is that you pretty much get your bags. And then, you know, you know, I can't, I don't know, it know, I'm actually dumbfounded right now. I'm like speechless. I'm like waiting to see where you're gonna go. I'm like, who? I couldn't go anywhere. I love it. So baggage claim anger is coming.

She's like sitting there at the baggage claim waiting for the sushi to come out. Like I'm bleeding. I just think this is one of those things. Love those places, by the way. And by the way, you end up spending not spending $9 million at those places. I love those places, the way and by the way you end up spending not spending nine million dollars at those places. I love those places but I feel like I've yet to go to go to one

where the sushi is actually like good. You know, it's always like fine and you spend a lot of money on just like average sushi, but it is fun to watch it go by. Yeah, it's a perfect. A huge sushi. So next step is Andrew and Leanne and we know that it's going to be a competition scene because these two are about to just start a season long war. And we've seen it coming, but this is the nail in the coffin. We know it's here because Leanne shows up in readers.

Like have even compete with Andrew's readers. Yeah, and they are a reader off. What is this like see span to on the weekend book TV? I can't know the one who can wear readers. Yeah, I can't. Mine are from CVS. So, Leanne, they get together at like a coffee place and they just like, they're like settling into like their seat and Leanne's like, it feels good just to sit still for a second and

then her napkin blows out way it goes dammit I knew that was gonna happen I love I love how like the napkins like you don't get to sit still I'm getting away from you she's like she's like trying to knock it like slam down god damn it that napkin the napkins the napkins terrified of Lee-in the napkin thought it was like home free. Please don't wrinkle me. The napkins. She's distracted. I can make a I can make a run for it.

I can be free. I can go and throw a bush. No, you can't. The napkins have always had it in for me. Ever since I was in the corny, you think I didn't want to be a little girl who would have cotton candy and something to wipe her fingers with. I try so hard to be accepted by that napkin. As a moment I tried to be nice to it. It tried to fly all. I was just warning dandra that that napkin wasn't trustworthy. I told dandra look, I'm gonna have a fresh start with that napkin. I am not gonna put a paper weight on top of it.

I'm gonna have a fresh start with that napkin. I am not gonna put a paper weight on top of it. At the first thing you did, it hurt me so deep. It flew away. So Leanne is telling Dandra that she's gonna have a little event for the girls called smashing good time. Which should horrify everybody in the state, you know, because it's like a Donkey Kong smash. It could just the whole world of buildings could start falling down.

Yeah, I feel like Leanne, reenacting rampage, is like a, it's a bad idea for the world. But at least there was no like smash mouth involved, you know, because that would have really, like, that would have tipped it over the edge if during this, this smashing scene later on, if like, smash mouth was just in the corner just seeing all star, you know. We don't need that.

Or smashing pumpkins. It could have been a smashing pumpkin smash mouth, like cover band, like tribute band, and they're like, Hey, now we're, uh, I can't even remember. I can't even think of a smashing pumpkin song. I was listening to one this weekend too. I actually sat and listened to a smashing pumpkin song the first time in forever. I'm like you Like oh my god smashing pumpkins. I'm gonna sit down and listen. No, it wasn't that I sat down and listen It was I was driving and the song came on and And you know, I like smashing pumpkins, but I generally changed the radio station. And I decided, no, I'm going to listen to this song.

I haven't heard it in a while, you know, with its dramatic church bells and in the beginning. And I was like, this is funny that this was ever a hit song, you know? Well, and here we are. Here we are. These years later. Here we are. Here we are, all these years later. Here we are. Still suffering from the mistakes of smashing fun kills me. So Leon's like, we're going to have smashing in the anger room.

You might have seen it films or television where you just grab a bat and start smashing things out of anger. I mean, it could have been worse. It could have been the purge. Yeah, it could have been. Just one night. It's like, let's all be nice to each other until 420. the Yeah, so she's like this could be good. This anger not we go with anger room We could be vulnerable to the group and then smash it smash it. Well, I don't know if I'm happy about this

I don't think that we have to begin anger man. I don't think she needs to be getting the facts. Okay Deandra is so out of control angry and everything she says today Yeah She is like Deandra has just gone down of this like has sent her down this path a crazy right now Do you know exactly what she was doing? D I think D did not like how what Deandra said about her in season one and now D is pissed at her and he's like That if you want to have your money want to but want to your own business

I wait mother but D was like she challenged you that cuz she knew Deandra would just spiral out of control and that's what's happening And I'm loving watching him. Deandre says, I don't need to see Leanne with the plate in her hand, ain't in my hand. Yeah, I love your anger. It's like first thing in the morning. Yeah.

So now Deandre's talking about what she has to do with her business. If she wants to spin off hard night good morning, she has to start from scratch, where it's literally like a bank account that has zero in it and like no employees, no nothing. Which to me sounds like a very daunting process and I just wouldn't do it. I think, well, I mean, it just seems like a major, major headache.

And she's like, you know, it's a lot, you know, I have no money. Okay, I have to hire people, I have to hire employees. I have to order jars and a few months jars. I can't do power. She has mother-save patches or out. Even when I'm on my own, I can't do pouches. You don't mean? I think you just keep your job, keep your money and then start something on the side. That's what I say. You know, like get an Etsy page or something. I mean, you know, like you're a zillionaire in your 50, okay, or 49. So just do something else. You know,

sell some arts and crafts or something.'s other ways to feel fulfilled I also feel it is so ambitious starting a new I don't even know how you do that how do you start a new healthcare line not healthcare like skin care line from scratch I don't know where I get on well old one because it's hard night good morning but it's true she has the brand recognition but then like but now it started in the good morning hard night. Morning, welcome. Welcome. Welcome. It's going to be a long hard night. It's be called hard not failure daughter. Fail my time. Fail my fail morning.

So I think she should start fresh. And I think that she should just start with a new brand name because honestly, hard night good morning is like, really, it's really hard to remember. And I'm always like, good morning, hard night, no, good night, good night, good morning, you know, just our fresh, or maybe turn it into like, like, GN, no, no, H and G, M, no, that doesn't help at all.

Hang on. Hang on. Don't listen to my branding advice, okay? Especially on BC. So, Dandra is freaking out. I will have to completely start over again. I have a car anymore. What am I going to do about Fanny? She's been with me forever.

I've got to send her out on the street. And Leanne's still mad that Dandra yelled at her about not being married yet. So she's going to give revenge and give her a taste to being married yet. So she's gonna give revenge and give her a taste to her own medicine. So she's like, yeah, well, welcome to the real world. You're gonna have to clean your own house. Lazy, you're lazy.

You have a princess. You're like a princess left out. And it's your own damn fault, period.and. I think the period is the dot, but that's fine. If you're gonna give me some tough love and be for Creek, you can't take it, don't dish it. Yeah, this is a company, it has to be run. It's not a boat that you put on the ocean, you say,

look, look how it floats unless the Titanic, which it sinks, which might just happen to your company, because that's where you're treating it, like a big old iceberg into your boat, okay? Now, pay me, dude. Now, who's the queen of readers? Because I just read you. So you're being very condescended right now, okay?

She then pay her bills, rich does. You want your girlfriend to listen, not to lecture you, I have a mother for that. Like can your mother stay out of one scene, please? I think it's, I think it does imagine Dia sitting at the next table with like a newspaper. She's just like lowers it and she's like mother not for long. You're being just Ellen right now. I just see signs her inheritance away to Fanny. Exactly. Fanny and Amelia split it. You know, Deandra, you know, I'm a huge Deandra fan, but like you can't do this

whole thing of like girlfriends are there to listen not to lecture after we've Literally just watch you lecture Leanne about her wedding, which is like far less consequential than Starting up a new business, you know like like start a new business. You need to be lectured I think I think in general anyone who's doing it needs it needs a lecture or two because it's really serious. It's money You know, I'm not my someone without a business though who's doing it needs a lecture too, because it's really serious, it's money, you know? When you're getting married. Not my someone without a business though, like confusing, but it doesn't even matter.

This is one of those things where it doesn't even matter who's sides drawn. It's just funny to watch them amp each other up to start screaming at each other for no reason. Yeah, I just don't like that, that Deandra didn't like, I felt like there was hypocrisy going on there, you know, that she, she has lectured Leanne so much. And then Leanne finally lectures Deandra and Deandra's like that's kind of standing. It's like well, yeah, that's the whole point. Yeah, and we sound married.

It's time for commercial. It's time for raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday's parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown Aller, we will be your resident not-so-expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking, oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong.

What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. So now Leanne goes over to some hotel or whatever to meet with Steve of Steve Campbell event design. He will be the wedding planner And he has the best wedding planner in the entire state of America.

He's played by ex-mayor, ex-sicago mayor, Rod Blagovitch. Should remember him. Is that his name? We're going to have it, or whatever. We're going to have it. Yeah, he looks just like him. It's like he's out of prison and he's got an extremely gay suit now in a pink plastic carnation to put in his pocket.

Oh, is that it? I thought it was like a magnolia. whatever it was, it was clearly like holding either a spy cam or like some water. Yeah, he's just waiting for someone to mess up so he can squirt water in their face. He's like, now, Leanne, I need you. Listen, I've got something very serious to tell you, Leanne, could you just band forward a little bit? Can you get real close?

This is probably a private of can you get real close this is probably a private years only getting really close but like got you Leanne oh I'll get you there say Leanne Hammett she want to spend per person it's this way in $10 damn it 20 dollars damn it just tell me the answer all right stop squirting me I don't bring my last clue I Don't bring my readers protect me She's just getting so she's squirted over and over again You know, but watching a lot of game of thrones recently and I'm just imagining Leanne every time she gets mad like in game of thrones

It's like this ongoing thing that like they'll be like some commotion and then you'll just see a head rolling on the ground. I try to imagine Leanne's gonna do this guy at some point. Yeah, she's not gonna throw bouquet. It's just gonna be Steve's head. Yeah, pretty much. You're the one to get buried next. Congratulations. Winter is coming. Winter is here bitches. Winter is here. That's why I'm getting married in November, okay? She's like, you're gonna kill me Steve. I forgot a notepad. I'm gonna be spied. A lock and always repay her debts debts so rich comes and he's like hi. I'm here Made it honey. She's like I'm so glad he came. See look. He don't have handcuffs on him His police friends aren't dragging him in here. He's here cuz he bless me to sit down

Yeah, she's like I'm so glad that Rich took the time out to come join us I'm like the time out from what what What else is he doing playing Frogger? Like he's literally doing nothing. Oh, so the cause I can imagine playing Frogger, you know, I can't see. He'd be like, God damn it. Here I've been this whole time trying to lecture people on how to act in traffic. I can run over.

He was like, so Rich, how's your day today? Pretty good. Got frogger to the other side of the street a few times. So success all around. I'll tell you, I know it's going to be a winner of a game when I show Frogger where the crosswalk is. Now, why don't they have stoplights in Frogger that would help the game immensely. If I make one difference in this world, it'll be that. I'm going to run for office. I'm going to say four crosswalks for Frogger.

I think a lame video game of all time. I think waiting for the traffic just to come to a stop and then quietly escorting your Frogger across the street until Leanne comes in steps on it. There. That's for an comes and steps on it. There. That's for all the traffic to have to stop. Sorry, I thought it was a print of fucked ones. Sorry, I thought it was carried. She don't watch yourself.

Don't think I don't know some things. Certain frogs just say in a certain side of the street if you know what I'm saying So Rich is like well here. I am she goes well. I thought you'd want to say and he's like well. I'm here So they basically want to spend five dollars and Steve Steve says Steve has to really think about How we phrases things by the way because he turns to and goes, so what's your vision for the wedding? I'm like Steve. And then he goes, what colors do you see?

What people do you see? I'm like Steve, can you please be sensitive? Now listen, I'm going to keep my arm the prize here. All right, okay, that's better rich. That's better. So Rich is like, I'll live from a checkbook at home. Okay. Because he's like, you can spend $10 or $10,000.

Okay, now it just depends on what kind of wedding you want to have. Do you want a Dallas wedding or a Plano wedding? I'm gonna have a Plano wedding. Squirt! Ow! It's just now you have a wedding inside a box. No, Plano, Texas, not a Plano box. Oh, I know what.

So, Dan is like, Dandro, please take note. I'm sitting here with the best Wedding Planner in Texas. The hardest man this side of the Rio Grande and a wedding date near Turkotom I'm on recreation of the night flower inside our wedding hall and I'm wearing a pilgrim dress She lands like so how many people lands like this is a crazy to think 500 to a thousand. Yes, Liam Yes, like are you inviting the state of Rhode Island? What is happening here? And if you're inviting a thousand people, then the two of us request and invite because that's too many people. It's a good getting. Like put us in the back. That's fine. But like if you're already inviting a thousand, then we demand a seat.

Yeah, we better be there. What the hell? Yeah. So the guy and also I don't think that shooting time where maybe it will be who knows but I don't think it is. It's over shooting time with me. Don't tell me when it's time to shoot. So the guy's like, no, it is it is shooting time because remember last year, Steph had a Halloween party. No, and then ended with a Christmas party. So it's full on that that is full on dial or shootin' time. Okay. Oh, well good plan and then. I just don't understand planning a wedding when you're on Bravo and not having it paid for by Craftsie.

Like who does that? Well, maybe next season, maybe next season. This is the season of like the wedding planning, maybe and then next season is like the wedding, getting happening. Okay. So then let's see here. Then Steve says, wait, so as they are tying everything up

and they're deciding what they're going to do, Steve then turns to him and says, OK, well, when you guys come back to meet with your vision, I was like, Steve, again, again, Steve. So real. You can't, you can't, um, pop a chair, Steve. So anyway, yeah, so they're getting the ball rolling there. And now we go over to Kerry's parent house, which I thought was in Palm Springs, but I guess they have another house in Dallas. No, that's why they're not there because their parents go to Palm

Springs during this time of the year. Oh, so their house is empty. All this time I thought when they were in their parent's house, I thought that she was going to Palm, oh, okay, that makes much more sense. No, she just, it's just, she's married to Mark. So she stays at her parents house and they're like, we're gonna move to Palm Springs just so we could show Mark his own land, okay? Yeah.

Okay, that makes much more sense. So Deandra comes and visits Carrie and you sit down to have girl talk and Carrie starts asking about Deandra's mom, and everything. He has everything going with her and stuff, and Deandra starts to launch into her whole thing. Yeah, Deandra's just like, wait, what? I had a sneeze there, sorry. Oh, I thought that was going to be like what Deandra, like, you're ringing out to up to be like, ggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg I'm the primary breadwinner. I don't even know what to do with myself anymore. I my eyelashes knocked over five pots today I can't even do that's pretty much how it is

It took me a long time to see what goes really goes on the society world and songs I could write a check I was a valuable member and then one of my very good friends lost her all her money and I told her you're gonna lose all your friends And she did they scared at my cockroaches That is so darned right to be like oh my god. you lost all your money. You're gonna lose all your friends Buckle in Yeah, friends you just lost all our money You're gonna lose all your friends I'm your last friend left. Okay, I am a cockroach who stayed okay. I am a cockroach who stayed in the lot So she goes through this whole thing about how she's starting all over I'm starting over in four nine fifty fifty

whatever and then uh carries like yeah because she goes I'm falling apart I haven't talked to anybody but I talked to Leanne she was all up my bills my balls you know how much it's cost you know my tech cost you know I'm a swatter cost you know I'm a big cost like I am supposed to listen to a woman who does not even put a paperweight down on a stack of napkins I mean am I really supposed to listen to that? Yeah, well you're lucky napkins are free because they keep running away from you So here's like yeah She said you only have two hundred dollars in your bank account so

She said you only have two hundred dollars in your bank account. So And then why does anybody talk to Carrie about anything ever? Yeah, she like she like She did this whole thing later in the episode where she's like last year I didn't tell anyone anyone said and look where I got me to this year I'm telling everyone everything if you don't want to tell someone don't tell me I'm like didn't you tell everyone didn't you stir the pot like a million times last year? Yeah, she started almost every five. She's like second next to Brandy. Yeah, so then so when she says that Lian,

Lian says that she only has $200 left. D'Andre is like the worst denier she's like. That's not true. I'm rich, I'm rich, I'm rich. I think maybe what Liam's saying was that, when we're in Vever Creek, remember people like our set was so funny. We were in Vever Creek.

I said that I was having fun and I was joking about having only 200 left. I don't mean like I was at 200 left. I just was like, you know, I have money left. The cockroaches leaving me there. And it's so funny that she's having this episode happen right after this weekend. They have a gay pride thing in Dallas and she or her Brandi and or she brandy and Stephanie were all on the Walmart float. We're all on the Walmart float. Oh, right after she's like, oh, money, I'm money, I'm money, I'm trying to find upside down.

Okay. I'm money. I'm like, lands just alone on the Sam's Club. She's just like, all right, I guess I'm here on the Sam's Club. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, so Andrew is like, she throws her best frame under the bus and says, I have $200. What kind of person does that?

Maybe the care is like well, they just are not like getting wedding ring fast enough. I don't know Yeah, I think I just want to make sure that you're okay. That's all my no no You wanted to make Leanne look like a bitch. That's what you did. Yeah, Carrie really I always like Carrie And I'm always tricked. I feel like in the seasons because usually I'm like, oh my God, she's so cool. And she's so chill. She's so funny. You know, her diary room sessions are so funny. And then she does shit like this.

Yeah. God, do you have your own storyline? Do something. I mean, can we have anything besides like, look, my husband's not emotionally abusing my children on camera today. You know. Like, what do you want to cooky? Well, she did say last week that she wants to repair her strain relationship with her father, which came out of nowhere and then seems to have disappeared this week. So I don't really know what's going on with Kerry this season.

But then after Kerry tells the answer this about what Leon said, Kerry just goes, I feel better getting that off my chest. I felt uncomfortable a little bit. Like, oh, well, I'm glad you feel good, Kerry. I'm really glad you feel good. Yeah, she's like right now in my life honesty is important to me. Okay. I'm glad that I'm glad now it's important. But also she was like I was just afraid that if I didn't say something it was gonna come back to haunt me. Like how is it gonna come back to haunt you? You know? Yeah, and it's it's lower than usual because it was off camera.

Yeah, you know, so that didn't even have a flashback to it. Yeah, that was a totally off camera situation that she's now using, but you know, whatever. That's why we watch this shit. So now let's go to the German office. Welcome. Oh my god. I'm in my husband's office. Have a stop in the meeting. Like all those cookies. He got all his cookies from Alpertons. Oh my God. Oh, they look good.

Oh my God. Good to see my past cookies. No, OK, Wendy. Do you want? No, Wendy's not. OK. So Travis is like, today we're going to start the college initiative.

Oh, my employees want to learn English or get their TD. Today we're gonna start the college initiative. Ooooooh! My boys want to learn English or get their TD or whatever! He's just throwing off his chairs across the room and breaking them through the glass. Yeah, he just like, chairs off his shirt turns green. So then Steph is there in the meeting and she's like saying that she has a finger on her nose for some reason. And she's like, I like that. No, I like that. I as a mommy want the best for your kids. And I was called my finger on my nose until someone notices that I'm here. And Wendy, that marketing is like rolling her eyes the entire time.

But I think that's just how she that's like her rest. She has like resting roll eye face, you know, because no one's mentioned her sassy new yellow scarf. Yeah. She's like, you try to make an effort for television. I went to Lane Bryant and got this beautiful golden rod scarf and no one has anything to say because everyone's like look at Stephanie with a finger on her nose. I even brought these lovely cookies from Albertans. Glad Stephanie could show up to take credit for all of my hard work.

Ma'am and I was tied this scarf around the wrong neck the whole damn time. Maybe I'll just mention my great idea about dyslexia. We should do a dyslexia screening. Oh great, this bitch is crying. It's gonna be all about her again now. Great, great. Might as well just take this scarf off her and put it on her instead. Now because it's a big deal with what you've gone through

in your own life with Xaeli. Dislexia. Just make sure you're paying attention over there, cut, cut. Yes. I love that song by Rihanna. Dislexia. Nuh, nuh, nuh, nuh. Dislexia.

No, that's actually dyster, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, dyslexia. Uh, no, that's actually dysterbia. Oh, stupid bitch. So then we get Travis's backstory again. Yeah, that's dyslexia and then Polio and then like, type 4 fever. He wrote letters to Abigail from the Western Front and said, Abigail, I'm not sure when I'll be back from this red war, but I sure do miss your eyes that the only thing keeping me alive during this time. The only thing keeping up keeping my mind off of my polio is studying for my GED. Love.

Siver act. Siver. I know. Save her out So rude I know just like she runs in my family actually Ronnie you are so rude my sister is a teacher of dyslexic children Thank you very much. Okay my family is doing it that for this world. I will be horrible if I walk you So then I wrote down what you already mentioned Wendy just rolls her eyes for no reason We just get the shot of her be like what you already mentioned Wendy just rolls her eyes for no reason. We just get the shot of her to be like love is pretty classic Wendy. Yeah, yeah, when they're like not happy. Yeah, so then Stephanie and Travis are all in her office and he's like all right we'll get it done. Now don't forget I'll be going to a whole month of May and she's well, education is the key to success.

So he's going to lead a leadership class at Harvard. But I need to figure out if the boys can come and see her, not you want me to bring him down? Because I get stressed when I'm alone. What am I going to do? I'm being all alone. The house, just the kids. You'll lead everything.

You do everything. Will you send us lists? Will you just send us lists? Just something. Just something. Anything. He's like, I know I'm the dyslexic one here, but you're the one who said that Boston was down from Dallas, so... He's like, I'm gonna be really busy, babe. Okay.

And he goes, be a leader. And she says, I've never been a leader. Now one time in my life, name one time I've been a leader. And he goes, he just like stairs her and this a really long pause. And he's like, you got this. So you remember that time when you cut out some coupons for Albertsons regarding cookies and then he brought cookies to the meeting. That was Wendy.

Oh, OK. He doesn't even try to come up with one so good. I love that every husband on this show, Loki hates his wife. Yeah, there's like some quiet resentment on this show. Well, that's what makes for a good housewives show. Yep. I'm speaking about not so quiet resentment. We then go over to the anger room, starring Jody Foster, where Leanne has, is there in a mustache and like a spiky 80s wig and no one seems to understand why maybe not even Leanne herself. Yeah. Leanne's like I don't get it either just roll with it. Hey everybody I'm Gallagher. Was that maybe she was going for Gallagher because he smashed watermelon some stuff. Gallagher is a

very specific look and she was she needed needed to have like long, can you g here? And then like a little mustache situation, but she had like a big, but she must ash. And like spiky, like almost like Chris Jenner in the 80s hair, you know? So, Leanne, yeah, she's like getting her smasheres together and Carrie is the first one there and she's like, um, Wow

That's an outfit. What are you? You know what? Have you looked in the mirror lately? What are you? While we're while we're on the subject. What do you would pack her? so Yeah, and then Brandy and D'Andre are driving together over to the anger room and Brandy is like I don't take out the way I feel with violence like oh'm like, oh, quiet. Oh, yeah, shut up. You have the most violent household here. God, no kidding.

You take your anger out on mean girl cheerleader emotional abuse. Okay, click is them. You done husband treatments. Yeah. So let's see here. Yeah, so she's like, I don't, you just violence and I don't believe that. I'm not violent.

One time I threw a candle and it messed up our hardwoods and I was like, can I make violence? She's like, leave it up to the end to throw a violence party. Well, she's throwing the party, but the only ones who are gonna have problems that I'm so frustrated when we shopping and I was frustrating I said I spent so much money. I've only got $200 less than my account. I met I have $200 to my shopping account She's don't carry now. There's gonna Tender is too crazy. I know and for the story has changed since Carrie because with Carrie She said well, it was just like she just she was like, well, I mean, I have more than $200 I didn't mean it was like I meant like as a joke.

And now she's telling Brandy, well, I only had $200 in my shopping account, but I have more. I mean, I believe that Deandra has more than $200 for sure, but she's already changing her story around. So it's making me be like, mm, mm. I think she was at the end of her allowance for that week.

Surely we've all been there. I was at the skating rink. I used to go to the skating rink and get a pickle, you know, but then it's like you have 50 cents left. What are you gonna do with it? Cry, that's what you do. Like what are you gonna do? Play two games and miss backman. Wait, can we rewind you went to the skating rink and get a pickle with your allowance money? Is that what you're saying? Yeah, every week. My mom just like open the car door, kick us out with $5 and be like, I'll be back in six hours. It was like pickle time. Yeah. Pickles, pickles and skating. I guess you did in skate ever. Oh, that's the way to go in, you know, with was where I feel

see I feel like if I had $5 to spend at a skating rink or something like that, I feel like a pickle is not where I'd go. I think I'd go for ice cream. Well, you know, man, some of us were on Weight Watchers, so enjoy yourself. Sometimes I would get cotton candy, which is why I had so much anger about not having napkins with cotton candy earlier. You see, you're going to get so many pickles at the live shows now. No, no pickles. It's like me with the shrewp waffles. Well, those are delicious. I didn't know there were so many different kinds. Like this time you got many. Okay,

the point is a dangerous freaking out. And then Brandi goes, remember when I told you she was your friend, but waited for a weakness to use against you. Brandi, she never did that to you. Yeah, well, in your head, you were not, she was nice to you. What you were being me to Stephanie, then Stephanie was nice to you. And you immediately started talking shit about her and telling everybody shit about her. So I don't know what you're talking about. Well, what what you said, I mean, I don't even remember how everything went

down towards the end of season two because so much started to happen all at once. I don't even remember why Brandi switched over to being aggressively anti-Liann. I think she thought that Leanne said something because Carrie had said something. It was something weird. It had something to do with the issue with the doctor's office. There was so much craziness at the end of last season.

I can't parse it all out. But the one thing that I seem to remember was that there was no like exploitation of brand Evers. Yeah, Brandy's always the one crying and whining that everybody's hurting her and going against her. Nobody's ever done shit to Brandy. This is all And fucking head. She's the aggressor in almost every fight she's in. Yeah, it's a very good point. Very, very good point. You know, coming up with Carrie and Carrie is a major shits stir, but it looks like they're going to have problems soon. And I guarantee you it's Randy starting this shit.

It always is. Well, also, just even right here, Brandy saying this, it's like it is such a manipulative thing to say because honestly, like, there was no moment, at least that we saw on camera, where it was like, you know, maybe like, well, Leanne is one of my best friends, so maybe there was a context in which she was saying it that she wasn't, like, maybe she was, like, I feel like if one of my best friends had something like that, I would give them the benefit of the doubt

that they weren't being gossipy, right? That they were saying it is more of a concern or whatever, you know, but I think that really de-Andra is in like such a hypersensitive place because she's so anxious about the situation with her mom that she's just being crazy. And so Brandi, her first instinct to be like, well, Leanne's just trying to exploit you, you know,

trying to like, you know, find your weakness and use it to her advantage to like make herself feel better about her own. Yeah, and she's such a... Is it such a... Is it a cure and she used you to feel better about herself? I, I'm just saying she's such a... Is that the... She's such a... She's such a... I mean, I don't know.

I actually don't think... I don't think that Leanne needs that, to be honest. I think that Leanne is in like a... Well, Leanne's not as wealthy as Deanne, but like... I don't know, everyone likes... Everyone who watches Broadway... She's just going for someone's insecurity, right?

She's going... She's insecurity, right? She's going she's telling Deandra this because Dandra of course is going to have that fear as she's already said in this show that people are only your friends because you have money. So Braddy saying, well, she's only your friend because you have money, you know, so like, why isn't he taking something that you're insecure about and uses against you. She's doing it right in the scene. Yeah. And why is it that was the case? Why isn't Leanne doing this to Cameron? You know, because Cameron, I think, is probably the wealthiest of them all. Well, supposedly she is because she's friends with the rich girls. She's like closest with

the rich girls and she fucks with the with the planos of the group. What is Brandy's point? Yeah. No, but yeah, yeah, okay, I see what you're saying, but like, I don't know, I just felt like this was like so. I mean, not so brandy because it's just, it's just like, I feel like brandy, like, to me, it's frustrating when one person is accusing someone else of being manipulative, but that accusation in and of itself is just as manipulative or more manipulative

of as the accusation. Right. Yeah. I got it. Yeah, she's an asshole. They're,'re there. Let's sum it up. Brandy's an asshole. Okay, so next up, uh, we're still in the anger place and camera comes in. She's like, sorry guys. I'm a few minutes late because I literally just flew in. in Global Pet Expo. Yeah, I was at the Global Pet Expo and I have some great leads, on some distributors. What's the point of the mustache? So she can be more family-smashing stuff.

Maybe there's a Mr. and Mrs. Leigh-Anne and Mr. Leigh-Anne came to smash the... That's like, that's an interesting theory. Sure. He's like, that's, that's an interesting theory. Sure. It's like, so now what does anyone know where I get my bags? This is where I brought a car, right? Is this Alamo? So the global pet expo in Orlando went so much better than I could have imagined.

Like, I got pictures there. And that was like a big win for me. I took pictures in front of my booth. So Liam's like, your skirt metal is to put handy stuff in. For example, Mon-Fid-Hands. They work quite well. So Liam's really into her thing, you know, and she's got a lesson for everybody. You know, Leanne's like, and here we are to empower women. You know, so she's like, I got pink eye patches. So you know, you're here to do battle.

I want to get them into spirit. It's what today's buyout. I also have pink eye. Don't scratch your button and this scratch your eye. Lesson learned, ladies. Lesson learned. Yes, they have like a tutorial about like how to smash things and stuff. And then lands like, we are doing this because we have to get to the real issues.

We're not going to be fake. And then she like dramatically removes her mustache and her wig. And she's like, that's why I wore these to show that we can take off our invisible mustache and wigs and be our true selves. And I feel like everybody in this group is pretty good at being fake, which that's like like Lee and that's like not how to bring people together. You know, by accusing everyone of being fake, that's not going to work. Nick, carry on mess up your face. So we can have a real talk. Could someone turn the fan off that's blowing the carrier's face? Oh, no, that's just what our face looks like these days.

Okay. And carries like, oh, well, we're not going to be like last year at that tea party, right? Because that was not coming from a good play. Okay. Can we just let that pass now? You're on a different season. If you're going to still be mad over the same shit from like 10 years ago, Carrie, you know, we're going to need that face to show up to court. Um, I am going to

respectfully disagree with you, Ronnie. I think it's great to bring up the tea party because then we get flashbacks to said tea party where it's like, I was like, Gary, you're a bitch. You saying I'm a bitch? Are you calling me a bitch? I guess I am. Oh, oh, oh. And they should have shot of Cameron where she like rotates at the camera. And he's like, oh.

And then, man, I'm not. I'm not. And Andrew slimy down her gav. We will not talk like that in my house. So, Andrew's like, I have never been fake. That is bullshit. That is bullshit. And then he goes, I'll be like, you have that.

I'll be like, you have that. What does that mean? You'll let me have it. What does that mean? Huh? What does that mean you'll let me have it? I'm not fake Well, I'm certainly not said everything. I've failed. Oh, you said a lot and you've asked the told people I'm it's my I say what's in my camp. What the fuck is that someone who's been my friend forever? I'm here. It's one guy with another person Terry sorry, that's you and say such horrible thing I'm sorry, sorry, that's you. And say that horrible thing. Hey, boom, boom, boom, boom.

It's like she's being played by Sherry Atari right now. I'm sad to be not. And then I'm losing you. And then I was like, oh, she's like reaching for her readers. Let me get those readers to shame or into silence. Oh, no, where are my readers? Where are my readers at? Oh, I've been stripped of my powers.

And she's Lee has to stand calm and nodding and doing that thing with her lips where she's like, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, say them, never ever! Uh, and then Cameron tells us she goes, I got that she's upset and embarrassed. But why would you even believe that rumor? Like $200, what is that? Her Starbucks account? How much coffee is Cameron drinking? Wow.

That's a lot. I keep a balance of $20 a max on my Starbucks thing. But you know Cameron's that person in the Starbucks line that's like, oh my god, I owe you 50 cents. How do I do that? She is the one who is being slow in the Starbucks line. Like I actually pass so much judgment on people who don't have the Starbucks app when they go to Starbucks. Like it like, I'm sorry, I do, because basically the Starbucks gods have given us an efficient way to order food, like to pay for it, you just scan it, and then that's it.

And if you're sitting there pulling out dollars and quarters or whatever, I'm sorry, but there's an app for that and you should use it. I really do believe that, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. That may be one of my most shallow judgments. I understand, like, you know, I understand that there is like, like, if you don't have a smartphone, then I won't judge you. But if you have a smartphone and you have willingly opted to not have the Starbucks app, but you're going into Starbucks and you are like, like pulling out cash and being slow, that's a problem and you need to fix it. Well said. Although I will say, well, I think you were with me, right?

That I was the slow person Starbucks the other day because my thing wasn't reloading and I was like, oh my god. That happens every time I complained about something, it turns into me. It's like instant corners, you know? But the thing is I felt shame and I feel like other people don't feel shame. And I was, I felt shame and I gave like an apology look to people around me. I know. When you go to therapy and you're like, I'm sick of feeling shame.

And then they treat, they show you how to not feel shame. That means they've turned to a do a horrible person. Okay. Yeah. Because, and this is, and by the way, this Starbucks issue is a major problem at the airport. Like airport Starbucks, it's like people order it even slower and they get more and more confused and they decide to add more customizations. It's like, you know, at the, like just at the very least, just scan and then they, and then they want to use a ball their gift cards with the airport. They're like, okay, how much is on this one?

Okay, use that one. Okay, how much is on this one? Do that one? Okay, I'll do the rest and cash. It's like, I'm going to shake you. There is a flight I have to catch. Oh my gosh. You guys should see when, you guys should see when somebody tries to combine all their gift cards in the Starbucks line. Ben is like, I'm to catch. Oh my gosh. You guys should see when you guys should see when somebody tries to combine all their gift cards in the Starbucks line Ben is like I trust you We have a loyalty. I don't do that to you. I don't do that to me. You don't get to do that to me. So Leanne's like I agree I'm trying to make a situation. I wasn't there to protect you from better And I know you don't see that right now and that's why it's so humiliating the people

And talk about this Everyone tells us to say, surely a $200 You know that I have your back and you do not have my back. You do not have my back. I'm like Deandra You were the one last week who when Leanne said, you know what? Be careful with Brandi. The very first thing you did is you went up to Brandi and it's like Leanne said this. So you really can't talk about who has used back, honestly. Yeah.

Now also now that we said that, Leanne is also full of shit. It was completely stupid for her to go up and say anything to carry at all. And then for her to say I was trying to make a situation I wasn't there to protect you from better. Yeah. But the thing is this when Leanne's full of bullshit it's so funny. I don't know. Because it's just like it's it's consistent with her character, right? But like when when someone like Deandra is bullshit, I guess because Deandra's being more um like the Andra is bullshit. I guess because the Andras being more um indignant about it I guess or sanctimonious about it whereas Leanne's just like well I wasn't gossiping. I just I heard about a situation. I thought I could protect you by talking about it. It's like

it's like people who yell at the fireman and then Cameron of course makes it about It's like people who yell at the fireman. And then Cameron of course makes it better. You like the fireman? Cameron's like, I started a fire, now get out of my house. So Cameron's like, I didn't hear any of this stuff that you just said. I'm blindsided. I was too busy bashing a baby. Apparently I'm too busy making fun of adopted babies.

You have to choose your words more carefully. So then Leanne tells us the story. She says, when she came home from shopping, she said she was upset her mom would be mad. She spent money on the company card. And I thought I would bring you in carry because we're building trust and their friends and it's not gonna trust circle look okay yeah the last thing I

want is for DeAngelo's Fanny okay and I love that she got in there that Deander is spending money on the company card and she's in the game trouble and then so then Leanne starts like telling Leanne's like it's like I thought I was doing that in complete privacy like oh okay like excuse me miss queen of England. Yeah, it's very fancy when she's like now that was not the way in which it was intended to be spoken to the aisle. When I put when I put it on the schedule with Carrie that we'd be talking in privacy I thought in fact we would have total privacy to stab or not to strangle. That is the question. Anyway, let me eat my sandwich which is wrapped up in aluminum.

And Stephanie is like, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if you have $200. I'll send you to college. You can learn so many things. You can reach forwards. Don't cure your polio. You can get so many things you can reach forward Don't cure your polio you can get a GD and camera is like And camera is like no matter what We're here for you. You'll never be invited to one of my parties again And we'll be even more here for you when you have more money. She starts throwing nickels at Dan this head And Brandy's like it shouldn't be I. I grew up in a trailer and I'm okay. I even go back and visit that trailer and carry ever so class. He's like, oh, what's in the double wide? Oh, single. I'm like, okay, I love that you're mocking her for the trailer. Well, I think they were trying to bring levity because Leanne was also like,

did have wheels, she's like, no, because the Mississippi river. So, um, so now it's like, things, so now it's like whatever. So now they're going back, now they're going to start smashing stuff, but now Leanne is mad at Karen because she felt like, you know, like she had told Carrie this and Carrie just completely went and told Deandre. So now she's really mad and Lian's like, you know, when I said it, I wasn't saying it in like a ha ha way, I wasn't trying to be gossipy and carries like,

no, of course not and I said that. I'm like, no, you did not say that at all. Yeah, she's like, well, you know, I said that you were doing a nice way and if I wasn't honest, I mean, come on, this would have blown up in my face, you know, and if there was something said about me, I would want to know But the thing is that like there's a difference between just sort of like like Gossipy gossiping backstabby stuff versus being like oh no here's a situation

Like what do you think at it? Well, I don't know if Liam said it like what do you think we should do? That's what she's saying because who knows the land, but like I think I mean, I think she's right to be in trouble is just that how it happened You know she did it off camera and then Kerry just takes any little thing she can and runs right to her I mean, I think lian's definitely in the wrong she shouldn't have been saying shit like that because then when Deandra told me and that Deandra was also telling her that off-camera in private. So, you know, the rules work for everybody. They're all being dicks here.

It's just, they're just like, let's all yell at Leand again, you know? It's like, oh, God, can we let's give it a build up? I do like when they yell at Leand, because it just means that Leand's crazy is gonna come out, which she's been like throttling that crazy this season, and like, we know it's gonna explode, and like, I cannot wait for it like that

This is like what I'm this is making me more more excited. Well till then I've got magic markers Yeah, I want you to write something and smash it on smash to write something on this plate and smash that plate How about you, D'Andre? Yeah, D'Andre I don't think she understands the concept of this because she writes down on the plate I am good enough the way I am. And then she throws it at the wall and smashes it. I'm like, hmm, I think you're just destroyed yourself as dean right there.

I'm like, I think you just did it. And she's like, my mother is right. I'm gonna throw this against the wall and break it. And Leanne's like, do you forgive me, Kim? Kim? Kim? She's like, I'm still pissed, Leanne. She's like, well, I don't care.

I'm still not gonna leave you. So then Carrie goes next and she's like, I mean, all she had to write down was Mark. Like, literally, that's all she needed to write down. But she takes the whole pair, you know, she takes the entire plate. She's like, I'm gonna speak by mind, even if it pisses people off. So, okay, so you've never regretted anything in your real life and you have nothing to regret Jesus, but it's like but also like stop writing down good things on the plate and destroying them

You're supposed to write down the shit that you want to release It's like I I will be my own woman crash. It's like okay You want to disavow yourself from being your own independent woman. Okay, I, okay. Yeah, that's really mad that they mess up the process. Yeah, well, Steph gets it back on track. She got it right. She's like, struggle to be loved.

And with that line outside of Dandruff's house, asked me to go for a walk. It just said yes. Smash. And Karen's like, I want to live the simple life. Which like made no sense. Like it was neither like, like it was nothing like hanging over her.

It was nothing that had to be smashed. And then she smashed the simple life which meant that she wanted to live the non-simple life. But also it's like so condescending too. It was great. I love that everybody just stayed quiet and stared at her like waiting for it to finish since she never finished

She like literally just wants to resurrect the show the simple life and star in it. Yeah, and Liam that's hot Liam's like I regret not starting a big fat Greek storyline went my big fat Greek wedding storyline earlier She's like I regret not breaking plates. There, fix that. I'm Brandy. I'm always being worried about getting a nanny because I deserve one. Basically. That's what I'm being. We're all going to feel bad for Brandy now because she's really overcoming that huge struggle of spending money on a Danny so she can go out drinking with her friends. Oh my god, what a storyline. It's like it's so it might as well be cancer. Oh Mary Poppins, please come save the day. She's coming back. There's a sequel coming called Mary Poppins Returns.

Yeah, it's coming out this December or which I never saw the original Mary Popps. Oh my God. Okay, stop discussing me. We're in the home run here. So now, like, you know, Steph has to go, I gotta return these cookies to Ralph's. So Brandi walks to sort of the lobby area with her, and she's Brandi's like, Brand new is not sure if she should bring up what she learned about what Leanne had said to Deandra.

She's mentioned it or not. Of course, definitely. I say you should do it because we're on TV show. So Brand is like, okay, I'm going to do it. She goes back to the group and she basically confronts Leanne. I heard that you said that Deandra shouldn't be friends with me because I'm going to her her the way I hurt you or something like that. And Lee, I heard you have hesitation about Deandra being friends with me.

That's it. And then Lee, I'm like, what? I never, I've never said a thing like that. I never tried to lock down an afternoon. It's harder than you think. Rob Brandy, best brand new best brand now, Dan. Sad a thing like that. Hey, you ever tried to lock down an after and it's harder than you think right brandy Huh best brand new best brand now, Dan And dude was like I said what you said sit in there, okay, and You were sitting right there and I you were right there. It all happened Lee and Lee and goes

Yeah, yes, I said that I did say that you know what's funny. I did say that brand. Yeah, I Said that I wanted to make my own decisions and you said I should break my own stitches and Cam breaks in and she's like um brand him All be honest and but yes do it do it I was worried when you guys were getting a little close because I thought you'd be about influencing Sandra in some way. Hmm. Not a love that camera and she always finds the absolute worst time to just say something ridiculous. Like she just she she exacerbates the situation like the very worst time. And that's why I love because then she goes

because I didn't think Deandra was the sort of person to put a curicop up her butt. I'm like, oh my god, I can't believe she's still upset about the curicop. And she's mentioning it now. Now. She'll never let it go. And Brandy's, you know, is given Brandy the perfect opportunity to be the victim. So she's like, you don't even have to speak. I got it. And curious like, yo, what? You're not telling her to do anything. She's like, no, I got it.

If I hadn't brought this up, then this wouldn't have happened. I'm being about influenced. Once again, she's a grown woman. And then she like runs off. then Andrew starts right then Deandra starts getting into a hock She's like I am a hundred percent in charge of things in my own life I do think the way I want to do the make if I want to say a cure a cup of my ass I want to make my business about that and that's way it's gonna be and Cameron just goes Like that per slip thing that's like

Whatever you say I support you you broke dumbass. I always support poor poor. I regret that Deandra is poor. They're like the game is over. Okay, I can't. I wish I could live the simple life like the andro of the poor. And no one chases brandy out. So she comes back,

which is so mighty. So she's like, um, just wanted you guys to know that I was in the parking lot, but I realized I have integrity and morals. And I said a good example for my children. For example, that stripper pool. Or, you know, it's like, oh God, should we make a list? Yeah, then Cameron's Cameron at this somewhere around here is like, I didn't say it was bad that what the Andrew was, what the influence you had on the Andrew was, I just said it was different. Like, you know, a poor person, which I guess is what she is now. I don't understand how people pick my card every time they tell me

to pick one, but you know what, I'm not going to stand against magic. Okay, if you can make coffee with your butt, you can make coffee with your butt. Congratulations. I'm just saying I never saw that side of Dianna before. I always saw someone who was well behaved and extremely wealthy and now I'm seeing that she's just a boar who's poor. I rhymed. So Leanne's like, um, okay. Now here's the deal, Brandy. Last year, I called very close to you and I felt deeply hurt.

And I said to her, I've been down this road and it didn't work out and as my friend I want you to be careful that's it. Okay very clearly said and very good way to stand up here Self-hunt my breath. Yes, so then Dan Ranger bones is rolling garage like Like dander is about to lose her shit. She's like, can't be that flake hammer again, man And Brandy's like if we're starting fresh, why are you saying this in Cameron's like oh Fresh food that's something you won't be able to have anymore Deandra now that you're poor And that's pretty much it

Yeah, wow what a fun show. Everybody, thanks so much for listening. Don't forget to go get your tickets for New York City. We have tickets up in for our Real Housewives of Dallas Recap, which is going to be on Thursday night, and we're sold out for Friday nights, so sorry about that. But come see us on Thursday and then the next month we are in Seattle. And then in December, we are in Nashville, which is going to are in Nashville which is gonna be in your band. Fortieth birthday party. So be prepared to come in your morning clothes. Oh my god it's

going to be yeah my 40th I will I'm turning 40 on December 4th and then the national show is on December 6th so yeah Yeah, it's gonna be fresh. So go get your tickets at WatchWithCrapins.com. You can also find links there to go by head badge. Or a t-shirt for September. That will be available in another two weeks or so. So go over there and grab that until then. We'll see you guys soon. Bye.

Bye. Bye! Hey, prime members, you can listen to WatcherCrapins Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. leading a short survey at 1dry.com slash survey.