Watch What Crappens - RHONJ: Talking On Broken Glass - Live from Dallas!

Episode Date: February 9, 2019

We're talking "Real Housewives of New Jersey" at our first ever Dallas live show, and while we may be focused on the Garden State, that doesn't mean we don't get some major RHOD crossover cameos by LeeAnne Locken and Mama Dee! Fair warning though: an audio glitch caused us to lose about 10 minutes in the middle of the recording, but don't worry, you're still getting all the good stuff! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Who cares what happens when there's so much that crap is. What crap is? What crap is? There's so much that crap ends. Crap ends. Crap ends. Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap, Crap But when you don't reach her, you can't just watch. I think spread this so much that it happens. Hey, everyone. Welcome to Watch or Crap Ins. A podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to watch.

I'm Ben Mandelker from the Real House Swares of Kitchen Island, which you can find on YouTube. You just type in Real House, where there's a kitchen island. You'll find it. And joining me shortly will be Ronnie Carrom from the Rose Pricks Bachelorist Podcast, only the best podcast about all things Bachelor. So today's episode, we're talking all about the latest real house, the new Jersey installment and we recorded it in Dale's Texas at the Texas Theater, which is super, super awesome.

If you want to see one of our live shows, go to watchocrapans.com to get your tickets. You really, you really should come to our live shows. You're about to hear, hear one and we had so much fun and everyone has such a great time. We'll be going to Vancouver for just for laughs and then we'll be all over the country going to Portland, Phoenix, Cincinnati, Milwaukee, Minnesota, Boston, Irvine, not necessarily in that order, or probably miss something left something out. But go to watchrocrapons.com. You really don't want to miss out on these shows.

You never know what's going to happen. We always have a blast. That being said, just a quick note about tonight's show, we had an issue. The audio sounds great, so we're happy about that. But we had an issue because we were recording the episode onto a flash drive and the flash drive ran out of space, soups annoying. But luckily the guys in the sound booth were able to catch it, but we lost about 10 minutes

of audio right in the middle of the episode, which is a soup, super bummer, but honestly, you guys, there's like, the episode is long enough as it is. Maybe it's a blessing in disguise. So sorry about that. We'll give you heads up when that happens. And enjoy the show. We began the episode, Leon Lock and walked right on on stage. And started talking, we had to go out there just to address everyone and sort of warm up with the crowd up, etc.

So here we are, Ms. Leon Login. These guys, you know, you know, I have to tell you guys, when I first started Housewives, I listened to their podcast and I love you too. And I love the person dressed like a fucking trolley tonight. That's Lisa! Are you funny rock? That's the shizzle!

So the first time I listened to Watch Your Crappens, I was like, and then I was like, oh, it's comedy. And then I fell in love, and then I'm like, shit. Now I got to listen to every episode They're making me Hi What's up? Thank you, Leanne. I love you. I love you, Gauvin. We love you. And thank you to Ms. Mama D down there.

Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row.

Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in the front row. Mama D in wedding planner in town. Yes girl. And your mom is trying to steal a wrench. My mother, my father, my sister, my brother. Yeah, they're all here.

Everybody's here. It's a family affair. So you guys, so you guys, so obviously as many of you know, tomorrow night show sold out. So we added this show. And we are so excited that you guys came here in the Friday night show. And I know that probably a lot of you guys wanted us to talk about Real House.

That's a Dallas tonight. And obviously we're talking about New Jersey, but naturally, in lieu of Dallas, we have. Dallas! Yeah, lockers! I got Dallas, girl. Now, Leigh, we learned our lesson because when Jeff Lewis was on this show, we made his ass wait an hour and a half while we did a recap first. And girl, oh.

I mean, you've never lived until you've been yelled out by that queen, you know? Yeah. I've heard. And he's still one mouth let it go. So I learned, you know, I learned, if he ever comes on again, he'll be an hour and a half in. But I learned, girls, bring the girl up first. Get her out.

Maybe he engaged at a big fight after our show and then you know And that's how rumors get started That's how I didn't start that way. I did not so Leanne Rumors you can start. Yeah, take it away. So two weeks ago, Leanne you were at Andy's baby shower What was that like? Housewives non-Starroids. Everybody was insane and I gotta tell you, I have never been so proud of the tables at the Palm. I know, yeah. When Lisa ran a jump-top and then she was like, you bitches get on the table! He pays your friend! I was like, uh-huh. Uh-huh.

Right? Right. Did you make any friends? Who cares? Who cares? Who cares? Who cares? Did you make any enemies?

Who did you yell at? I went at no one sort of sort of sort of. Sort of. No, that's not true. Okay. Okay, so Eva, Eva from Atlanta. Real asshole. I was like, so I was like,

never remember that bitch, did a little thing at Bravo. And she was all like, well, you know, I'm sure Leanne was a regional model. So I walked over to the photo booth where she and Fager were taking some pictures and I was like, yeah, girl, you guys show me how this national model shit works, girl. Show me. She fell on the floor laughing.

It was awesome. She was like, oh my god. And then I go, I'm going to get our picture and I'm going to circle you and put national and a circle man, but regional. She goes, Neenie, this girl's crazy. It's like yeah, man if you're saying that's right So the wedding that's still happening You have funny it's funny seeing rich here because they didn't know that they were coming They just happened to be living their separate lives

They didn't know that they were coming. They just happened to be living their separate lives. Yeah, separate lives! Those are your... They just separately arrived here the same night. Our first dance is gonna be to living separate lives. Yeah. So, it's actually one of my favorite songs of all time. So, I've been through that.

I'll have you sing it. Yeah. Unfortunately, there's not a song called, Your Charity World is going down the drain. But you could, too. Listen, you just don't show up at a charity event. Well, shit on your head. Will there be a trolley at your wedding

or will the cake be shaped like a trolley? There should be a trolley cake, but Rich has picked something else for his Grims cake. Oh, OK. You all should arrive in a trolley instead of a lima. Yeah. A trolley that has little cans like a large creamers. We are arriving at something that is not a vehicle. instead of like a lima yeah a trolley that has like little cans like It's something that is not a vehicle. It's not a car

Okay, it's a mimic her It's a what a mimic her a mimic her a bunch of mimic her's You know you know the first time I met them I wanted to take them sandpaper Remember that oh, yes, yeah First time I met them, I wanted to take them sandpaper. Remember that? Oh, yes. Yeah, in Chicago. First time we met Leanne, Leanne came to our show in Chicago.

Was anyone, did anyone happen to be at that Chicago show? Yeah? Sorry. Sorry. Leanne was amazing. You've never lived until you've tried to do a live show with Leanne staring at you the entire time. This is Leanne in the front row.

Bring it! Bring it! Talk shit about me, moe, fucker. Yeah. Do you want to talk shit about anybody in your cast? Oh, right here. Just thought I'd ask. Just thought I'd ask.

But seriously, the... No, I'm good. All right, well, get your ass down there and watch the show. Thanks for covering me up. Everyone get the rap rock at a big, red o' applause! Wow! I was so impressed with the way that she held this microphone and I mean they're just hands but they work so well Wow, that is so great. Thank you guys for being here. I think I think Leanne was she just like disappeared into the void over there in the corner. She's gone She's gone. Leanne is really getting thin.

I love you. All right, so when we do these live shows, it's always kind of a chore to think, what are people going to like that we're going to cover? And originally, we thought, we're just doing live shows, we're covering what we're covering. But then some people don't watch Top Chef. Some people don't watch.

Well, okay, then maybe it would work. Never mind, we're doing Top Chef from last night. Yeah. Yes. And Cersei's always a rough one just because, not as many people watch it, some people have a visceral hatred for that show. Yeah. But I have to tell you,

it is one of our favorite things to be learned. It really is so much fun. It is so fun. So with that in mind, welcome to WatcherCrapins, a podcast about all that crap it loves talk about on Bravo. Thank you guys so much for being here. And thank you to the God of real ashy as of New Jersey for giving us such a not only a glorious season, but what an

episode. Oh my god. Wow, we're gonna have fun tonight. Although first I have to put in a request, hey, Ashton, could I get a beer? Oh yeah, Ashton, get us some drinks. Ashtons are hookup. Ashton, we're sorry how we've tortured you this entire time. It's like, oh, this is gonna be easy. It's just you guys in the table. And then enter the glitterotty down there. Yeah. Yes, boys. By the way, these are Mama D's games. Look at these boys.

I can see why Gays moved to Dallas. You guys do it right, okay? By the way, if you have not been able to take a glimpse of Mama D, I mean, this is just like glamour and carnage right here in the front of her. I mean, I can't. Someone said she smells like money. They don't call it green miracle for nothing.

Yes. That's right. That's right. All right. All right. We opened this episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey as a continuing episode from last week, which was just a fucking mess. I mean, I don't even know how to start.

Yeah. All the women were down in Cabo. They just had this crazy dinner. The dinner was going nicely until, of course, Danielle stop is like, well, I'm going to kick this up a notch. Who years excited that Danielle stop is back? I mean, she's evil, but she makes a good show. Murmurs, murmurs.

We need it. Sometimes we need some Danielle stop in life. I do not need some Danielle stop. I can say that right now. I don't need it. Okay, it's like when people tell me my vegetables, you need your vegetables. No, I don't.

Does my poop come out like little tiny hard stones I don't need it. Okay. It's like when people tell me my vegetables. You need your vegetables. No, I don't Does my poop come out like little tiny hard stones that knock against the toilet? Yeah Okay, but it's worth it That's what makes the podcast thrive a difference of opinion. This is what I keep it is classiest possible for the night I'm not saying that I'm team-stob. I'm just saying I enjoy her presence. If you are not against terrorism, you are with terrorism. Ha ha ha ha. So basically the fight, well they just started fighting and Daniel started going after classic

Marge's kids and Marge threw wine right into her face, which I think we all enjoyed, right? Like, so she's like, that's why your kids are never around you. And Mars is like, Mars is like, look, you're an old dog. Look, the seriously, like, what's he got? You know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you know what she, you

what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she, you what she no paw. No, it's like, what's the trick? Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. No, it's like, what's the trick? Give it to me honest.

Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest.

Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it to me honest. Give it'll around you. Get over it! Get over it!

And then she rolled on the floor. And she was like, that was a trick! Danielle's basically becoming Rocky. See, it's like the Rocky that never fucking wins, you know? Didn't Rocky not win? I mean, I assumed Rocky win. Listen, there's only several great things I can put up with in pop culture. We're talking about below Jack, we're talking about...

I sat through friends. Yeah. I'm not sitting through Rocky, okay? You only get so many points from me. Yeah. Straight people. Yeah, so Mars throws the wine or a glass and just walks off. And then there's like all sorts of commotion to Laura.

So like, ha. Frank, was that you Frank? Was that you Frank? You know, it's nice to sorts of commotion to Laura. So like, ha. Frank, was that you Frank? Was that you Frank? You know, it's nice to get some wine on your thing. Wouldn't it happen if you had consulted me about... You know, it's like I told Frank, this wouldn't happen if you had consulted me about the tiles.

That's it. You know, yeah. That's all. Pablet tiles. Yeah, it could have been worse. It could have. Pabletiles. It's gotta be the Pabletiles. It could have been worse. It could have been Pabletile, my face. So then, Teresa is just like, Blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink, blink when you said so Teresa and the crowd won crazy and then I saw a presence I thought honest to God I thought Teresa would be right there that's the way my

brain works oh my god she's here it's a fine line between fantasy and delusion it's president Obama everybody I'm delusion I still think that's the president. Like I just never changed the calendar. I'm like, Roseanne's still funny and on TV. This is the first time I've taken a bout. I have to get a boot even in all that, you know. Tell my insecurities what, Teresa! So, yeah. So then, Melissa's sitting there, because Teresa's going, well, you didn't even say what Teresa was doing.

She's just acting like she's never seen behavior like this before, which is so hilarious. Teresa, the table flipper, you know? She's like, Blink, blink! I'm going on! I'm going on! Why you not even knew I was going on!

Baaaaaah! Goody-yum-sus! Also, Teresa, who started this fight. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on.

I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on.

I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm going on. I'm lovely barbecue. I suddenly like Teresa. I'm like, the hero we needed, boring lighter fluid on Danielle. So Melissa's sitting there and she's like, someone threw a glass at me and she's like,

I didn't throw a glass. So you're just like, well, it's either you or Jennifer. And Jennifer's like, okay, you know what? If you threw a glass at you, you'd know it. And then she changed her glass and smashed it against the table and holds it up like this. Which is so old. Like I need new weapons on housewives' shows, okay?

The Glass Sink was very scary the first time I saw it. It was kind of scary the second time I saw it. I feel like a garden hoe. You know what I mean? I need something like original and new to come with. The only thing like more old fashioned would be if she just started boxing like this, like, I'm gonna get you, all right? I'm gonna get you right in the face.

So, Melissa and Teresa are screaming at each other now because Danielle's just, she got just what she wanted. She's like howling like a dog, you know. She's like, I'm just like, I'm not the man. The red one, I'm out there. like a dog. Just like, just guttural screams like a kick dog, you know. And then Teresa's like, Blink, Blink, this is ridiculous. And Melissa's like, Trees, this one got you going in circles. You don't even know what you're saying anymore. Has Teresa ever

known what she's saying? Like, you're starting way too far back to have a fight, you know? Yeah. So Teresa makes her stand. She's like, she says something about her kids. She says something about Danielle. That's strike three for me. Technically, that's two strikes, but that's OK. And I just thought while I was watching this back,

my sister is a mathematician. And she's going to be sitting in this show Like really Ronnie are we thinking this low? Yeah, like a lady who can't even count to three. Yeah math jokes So so then since she's standing up for Teresa Jen goes That was very forceful That was very forceful. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Ah. Maniac. So the last thing happens at the Melissa, she gets up, she's like, you've got the wrong fucking girl. And I was like, yes. And then we just hear Teresa in the background. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, So then Jennifer, you know, sometimes you got to choose your words carefully when you're in a fight.

She goes, oh yeah, you want to come in my face. I mean, if you're not hearing it at home, that is just distasteful. I know. It's like, you really took it to a place there, Jennifer. She really does have this crazy, and you know her lips are like doing not knowing. And she's just so crazy. Her lip line got so good. And she's doing that, and remember that when this fight started,

before they were even fighting, Jennifer started doing this. She's like, mm-hmm. Yeah, that's right. Rocking back and forth, It's like, it's going to happen by the power of a programist. Oh my God. So the girl is already crazy. And so now she's screaming at Melissa. You want to come in my face, honey? You want to come all into my face? I'm right here. Come on,, come on baby. If I threw a glass at you, you'd know it baby. And I, like Jennifer is in Greece now, you know. Jennifer is like Rizzo from

Greece now. I don't know what the hell got into Jennifer. But that's why you like her, you know? It's like suddenly she's a pink lady, and I'm down. Yeah. So then this guy comes in, one of the producer guys runs in and he's hilarious, he's like, the Uber driver we had today. Well, we're like clacking in the back like a couple of queens, like, oh my God, what if Mama D doesn't get her text?

Like they were saying, this is what this poor guy's having to listen to and he's just sitting there with the sucker like And that's what the producer was like in this he comes to stand between the women fighting. He's like So So I think at this point Melissa walks away and she's like, oh my don't, you know. And so then Dolores, Dolores who had been standing there literally like this. It was like the producer while the producer was doing that, they were like, beep, and she's like, oh. She's like, hey Jen, you break a glass like that, you should get your ass, fucking kicked. Yeah.

Who the fuck are you? And then Jen's like, oh yeah baby, oh yeah. So she starts, she gets the lores in space like doing that. The lores is like, and then Jen, you're like, no. No. No. Yeah, so she starts you get the lord And then Daniel's like no No, yeah, do not go for Dolores do not go for Dolores She arthritis can't take it She's like even I know she's been under Frank. Okay. She's been through a lot

Mentor of doggo any of the other girls trust me, not Dolor or S. I just wrote down, show the fight. Because I'm from El Paso, Texas girl. I learned how to... Yes! Yes! I learned how to smoke, drink and cut a bitch. At the smoker wall.

I'm not a bitch, but you know a person. You just call him a bitch as you cut him, okay? Calm down, audience of ladies. I'm like a creepy confession up here. I didn't get a cut a bitch. You know what I mean. So when Dolores, like who the fuck do you think you are, Jennifer's like, I don't take fucking shit.

That's who I am. I'm like, maybe we should rewind the scene where you're buying all your kids. Amazon Prime, Barbie Houses. You literally take shit home. We've seen you do it. So Dolores is like, her triggering that glass. It triggered something in me. It was like seeing Pebble tile on the wall. Like, it triggers me, Frank, it just triggers me. If I didn't walk away, I'd do something I regret, like, last tile in a kitchen. Yeah.

If I didn't walk away and then back again, then walk away, then back again, then call Frankie, then call Frank, then walk away, then walk back. Make it kitchen, then he go back, I would've done something I would've regretted, you know. You think you should've go back to the kitchen, but now you make a certain one. I would've done something I would've regretted, you know. You think you should've go back to the kitchen, but now you make a circle and that's what you hear.

I don't get mad. I'm in a fond country. There's no pebble tile. I don't know where I am. I pass the countertop. It's hard. There's a motorcycle in the parking lot. We can do.

So then Jen is just nonsense now. She's had so much fun, and she's never seen this many cameras on her. Now, granted, they're all being worked by people with suckers who don't give a fuck, apparently. Yeah, but still the power you must feel with all those cameras suddenly in your face. So now she still just keeps yelling.

She's like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. She's basically a backup singer of a terrible pop song. All right, thanks. Yeah. You know it, sweetie. Yeah. Yeah! She's basically a backup singer of a terrible pop song. All right, thanks. Yeah! You know it, sweetie. Yeah!

I'm like, OK, you make no sense now. Just be quiet. She's literally yelling into a potted plant. So I think they do something on Jersey. I think the producers are really tricky on the show, where they just put gum and everybody's locks. Because every time somebody leaves to go back for their hotel room, they can't get back in.

Have you noticed that? I have not noticed that. Every time they get in the fight and they're like, I am leaving. I'm going to my room. Then you see them sitting in the lobby. I just can't get, they can never get back to their room. Yeah. I'm only in and then put up with that shit. Okay.

We end up making up the door. You guys had like, you guys had like a five-year fight throughout the hotel lobby in Copenhagen. It was like here and then there was a lot of you. Oh my God. I think that's my phone. I think that's the service elevator.

Okay, so Marge is sitting in the lobby and Jack is with her and she's like, baby, 12, what in night that was, that was crazy night. Oh my God, all that's working and all that yelling. I'm mortified, I'm mortified. I'm mortified. I'm mortified. You want to be truthful with the truth?

I'm not going to lie to you. I'm going to tell you the truth. Yeah, me to tell truth. Okay, if I want to go to CWE, I'm going to go to CWB match. That's for Joan. That's for Joan. That's for Joan. That's for Joan Revis.

That's for Joan Revis. That's for Joan Revis. That's for Joan Revis. Yeah, me too. Okay. You know, if I want to go to CWE, I will go to CWB match. That's for Joan. That's for Joan. That's for Joan. That's for Joan Revis. That's for Joan. Alright, hold on. Wait for the audience to die down.

Wait for the applause. Okay. Alright, here. You know what happened? You wanted the truth. To reason that tonight. You know what that is? To reason.

To reason to that. She's dying that. And she tells us, I've never lied to Teresa. I've never misled Teresa. I've never had a fight with Teresa. I've never given Teresa cupcakes. But I've never tripped Teresa. I've never pushed Teresa. I've never shut the door on Teresa's fingers.

Look what the hell? I actually literally don't even know who Teresa is. What the hell? Like honestly, I don't know who Jan is. Is Jan here tonight? Is Jan? No. So she is spares now. She's like, you're gonna have to speak LFB. She has to be an apology.

That's it. That's it. She has to be an apology. Until she gives me an apology, I'm gonna be sitting here deciding how I can fit a whale onto a pillow. That's it. So meanwhile, Melissa's like, she's sashing through the lobby, because Melissa has been

like walking through that lobby for a long time, and so she's sashing her dresses like one like this. And Teresa falls after her like, eh, eh. She's like, blah! She's doing like her, obligate, she like does not want to follow after her, but she knows if she doesn't follow after her, she can't complain that Melissa didn't follow her after their next big fight. And Melissa's like, why don't you just be with them?

Obviously, just want to be with them. I'm like, ha, my long, my long. You might fish that long, saying. So Melissa's like, Theresa, you're so one way with your thoughts, but everything's like, ha! You know, one time I wanted to turn my sandwich and the game wasn't below me instead. And I said, that's below me. It's like, what?

Why don't you even try to talk to Teresa? Just pat her on the head and give her a straw. You don't even have to give her a drink. Yeah. Just give her a straw, she'll be like, just waiting for a cup. Girl. Some list is like, those people act like animals,

which is hilarious. Yeah. And the Laura's is coming down the hall yelling now because she's been triggered. Yeah, she's met Let me tell you something to re-sau, okay? That fucking girl is fucking crazy and she's out of her mind I called Frank, he didn't answer, I called Frank, he has like, guess what? This girl's out of her mind, he didn't answer either, so now I'm telling you

There you go The girl's fucking crazy, I was gonna tell you about the bill Frank, he junior has for blow jobs, and he keeps in his bedroom I'm still confused about it Have I been able to discuss this to the dinner? No, no But guess what I'm gonna do right now press and elevate a button good luck bitch. Yeah She's out I'm gonna go call my mom right now. She's probably gonna be a cookie I don't know what happened. Shake you don't know what the fuck happened. She broke a glass like she's gonna find a encoder. Triggered.

Triggered. No, but she said she didn't throw that glass. Trist will literally go, no, because wait, what? She like had a system error, like. But Margaret said, vials things about Danielle. She like had a system error, like... But Margaret said vials things about Danielle and then her... Margaret's detoxic one. And she's like, no, Teresa, you're getting it wrong. And she's just like, ah...

She's like... Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, She only I can't She only believes the last thing she's heard, you know, she's like all I know is I can't wait to grow up. I can't wait to blow up Where's my best friend's Tay-Tay and Stephanie? So Margaret and Jackie are joined by Melissa Dolores on couches I have to write everything I wrote it down to Margaret and Jackie are joined by Melissa Dolores on couches. I have to write everything. Yeah, and I wrote it down too. It's just the scene. It's the same thing. So meanwhile, meanwhile, we go back over to Danielle's post-game report

and she's just like, I would never throw red wine at Margaret Joseph. Never. Never. Red wine. Red wine. Red wine. I would throw pig splines. Red. And this is like the 10th time in this episode

that they've differentiated between red wine and other wines. Yeah. It's not just getting something thrown at you. It's red wine. To this day, I can't listen to you be 40, because every time red red wine comes on I Think of the poor people who got red wine thrown at them How dare they make a song about that. She's punching the air at a beach

So Melissa's like Margaret's like the problem with she is like she doesn't even know what's going on sometimes You know like let's face she doesn't even pay attention you know if she even there like knock knock who's there I don't know anybody can answer that was shown all right credit with credit is to classic classic Classic that was for you Joan is that really missing Joan?, you know, not everyone's gonna listen all the time. So Teresa's like, Jennifer, so why did you break the glass? And she's like, Jennifer's like, Jennifer's like now taken from the school of Danielle stop, over dramatic, she's like,

maybe it was out of line, maybe I was lashing out. I don't know. Mike Bitch, you were just drunk. You were drunk and angry and sexually frustrated. Like many of us. Mm. And so Teresa's like, yeah, you shouldn't

talk about someone's husband, because you know what? You're kind of remind me of me. I'm like, oh, and then Theresa's mentor moment is meaning to shit out of somebody and threatening to murder them in public. I know. What the hell? Literally like shoved me off the grand cannon

and ever Theresa says, you remind me of me. I'll be like, bye, bye. But even worse, she says in the past tense, you know, I used to be a lot like Jennifer. I'm like, you used to be. We know that monster is still in there. I know, but I needed to come back out because this tree is like, huh, violent.

Like, and then they showed the clip when she's like, I used to be like, you just like, we're just going to live. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!

Yeah! I did this! No, no, no! I mean, I remember that, of course, but seeing it all fresh in my mind, I didn't remember that, you know? I know. To be fair, Bravo trots out that clip, like, 20 times. Like, I'm pretty sure it was during the Real House House of Dallas or reunion, like out of

nowhere. And it's like looking at a dime and it looks different every time you leave it. I know. So many layers. Doesn't it? So she's like, yes, there's her temper. People met with her and then she met with them. I go, OK, Theresa logic.

So then Jen's like, Jen goes, you know what? Can we just be done now? I'm done. I am done with this now. I'm so done. Like, it's everyone else's fault. And Jen just had to put up with this at dinner. Yeah.

I love these things. So up in March, it's sweet. They're all like, reaction to the drama the night, but then they're like, oh wait, we haven't actually had dinner. It's like, OK, like, 10 big is no buttons. OK, great. And then Melissa's like, oh, fuck.

I got to go talk with Teresa to make sure this doesn't send us back five seasons of the show. I'll be right back. Well, it was either that or eat something, and you know that bitch ain't going to eat something. I don't know when we can just start counting Adderall as lunch. I mean, it's not like it's a big secret. So they go downstairs and Ron, you always love to point out when this happens.

I don't know if you pointed it out. I'm gonna look at your notes. I don't think you did. So Melissa and Teresa sit down at this table. And on the screen right below Teresa comes an ad for how to train your dragon. That's pretty good. I don't think that they could be Vicki trying to cry about something of a victim and then the grinch the skull Christmas pops up. Golden. Okay, Bravo is so shady. OK, so this is how Teresa walks into the place. And Melissa keeps going, tree, I'm over here. OK, this is Teresa. Tree, I'm over here.

Tree. Tree. Tree, tree, tree. I'm over here, tree. Tree. Cacoo. Cacoo. cacau. Tree.

Wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm not going to find you. I'm not, girl. Has she always been that stupid? It just, it just upsets me when you read about a perfectly intelligent perfect... intelligently perfect... God damn it! God damn it! It makes me crazy when you hear about a perfectly intelligent person getting hit in a crosswalk

and fucking people like Teresa are still walking to serve. Because she's the one driving the car! Good point. So, so Melissa and Teresa are going to have like a little pow-wow to be like, listen, we're so good, they're crazy, but we're good. So Melissa's like, you know what, I don't think I'd like it when Jennifer drinks, she becomes crazy. And Teresa's rebuttal is like, yeah, but with Margaret, she doesn't drink. And she knows exactly what she's doing. Yeah. Rebuttles like yeah, but with Margaret she doesn't drink and

She knows exactly what she's doing. Yeah, you're only Because they're only excuse for anything if you're like fall-down drunk so you can say I was drunk after okay And most is she's like she do the red wine and most is like yeah, but Daniel was talking about her kids Her kids remember kids are off limits. Husbands are off limits. Parents are off limits. House plants are off limits. New tires are off limits. Gardener's are off limits.

Swimming instructors are off limits. Prick workers. Prick workers are off limits. We don't talk about them. Everybody is fucking off limits. Then what are we talking about? Like Teresa doing a crossword puzzle? Like no, okay.

If family is off limits and get Joe Gorgah out of the diary room. Yeah, okay. This is the match. I guess it's time for a commercial. Is something like that? I don't know. No, I don't need a commercial. I need a new living room.

Okay, Joe, that's what I did. Okay, classic match. Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellaside. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the buildup, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows.

It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. Well, so here we are. We're coming back into the live show. This is where we had our gap in the recording. And when we come back, we are at the part of the show where the ladies have returned

back from Mexico. And Jennifer is telling Bill about how her trip went and we are discussing him walking into the house after not having seen Jennifer in a few days. He's like, I had to take patience. That's how it is. I had to take the patience and you know what I'm going to do now? Take some patience. I'm going to take some patience right now in my home office. I'm going to go to some real naughty.

Home office. If anyone needs me, I'll be right over. So, Jen's like, okay, kids order something off Amazon Prime. I'm going to... Here's the iPad. I've got to make a fucking reservation. My husband's three hours late and he still won't stand and talk to me. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha You know like one of 19 So I was your trip

How was this combo Was there waves and sand and oh somebody go or just people That way I'm titillated. Hmm. She's like, we were having fun, but then somehow, Margaret started talking about cheating. I don't know how it happened. Oh really?

Yeah. Somehow it happened. Somehow that happened when you said, you're a cheater, you're mother's a cheater. Yeah. Your mother's been cheating for 20 years. Why should you be any different? You stupid skank.

Yes. And he literally goes, mmm. Mmm. Mmm. So then she goes, she goes, and you know what Margaret said. Margaret said, Bill is probably in the pool house with his girlfriend.

And he goes, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Oh, God. Oh, God. How people are satisfying. Hold on. I'm gonna call Stephen. Stephen, where do you find that what Jennifer said? Oh, good friend. Oh, it's not the funniest thing. Bye. So he laughs and she's literally looking at him like this.

Ha, ha, ha Like she's so mad. And he's like, hmmm, hmmm, so, so, oh, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm Welcome, Leila. Shhh. Copy that. Hmm. We can spill the tea. Oh, wow. Ha, ha, ha, ha. So she's like, well, we squashed that. But last night is what I wanted to talk to you about. Cut. Now we go to Melissa. And she's like, so last night, you know,

this classic housewife saying it's like everyone requested a village talking about the same or a conversation, you know. So housewife saying it's like everyone across the village talking about the same whole conversation you know. So Melissa's like yes last night they're arguing Jennifer's getting these eyes like it's like my it's like yeah. Then she goes and then 10 y'all goes bonkers and now glasses are being thrown and show it's like glasses whoa.

What is it with these women and emotions? and now glasses are being thrown and show us like glasses. Whoa. Whoa. What is it with these women and emotions? These women, right? Right, right. You know, it's like you're telling me a sandwich. They can't do that. You know, next you can know their strong glasses each other and try to have careers.

What? If peanut butter and jelly were fighting like women, they'd never be together in the sandwich, you know? They don't do that real as they make a beautiful sandwich. That's what we're gonna do. Our guy looks like he's being put under at the dentist's office, but not quite there yet. He's just always like, it's like you know he sees heaven,

you know, he's just like kind of unfocused. And then it's like the cameras always just so zoomed in on his face, I don't know why, and the lights are so bright. Just very intense. In the diary room. Yeah. Yeah, the camera's like that. Like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, it's like, I think Jesus.

So then we go back to Jennifer and she's like, and then Bill, there was this champagne flute there. And like, I don't know what came over me. I just, I took it and I broke it and I said, listen bitch, if I threw a glass of you, you're gonna know it and I threw the glass and then I put it down very politely and sophisticatedly. One of the good things about marrying a gay guy is that a happy, a happy male, but your

marriage with a very happy male. No, I don't throw that often. I feel like you can identify as whoever you want right now. It's 2019. If you want to be Bill and Mary Jennifer, I don't understand if you're gay straight. I don't understand if you're a giraffe and a donkey. That's how it is to me, you know those two.

I don't care. Do what you want. But you marry a gay guy. Because when you tell him, I broke a glass and threatened to cut a housewife with it. Because you know these fuckers have watched every episode together in bed You want him to be like I've just commissioned you a new come

Like you want him to just start crying, you know? But he doesn't. He's like a judgy gay guy. He's like, I would be his your husband, you know? I'm just almost cut someone and I'm like, in that dress. Like awful no matter what. He just goes, ooh, that's crazy. Ooh.

I'm not mad. But I think you're wrong. And if being wrong is wrong, I don't want to be right. Wait. It's like, you know, I've never been in that situation, Bell. But I have that charity event coming up. And, you know, I think we should go. and I really want you to come if you're free Because he will not shoot with these riches. He's like one of the ones that's come and shoot a lot for a bill right now

Yes, and I think you know just since we have you here rich is very good at that. He's like nope It's like you want to go to this party Mmmmm, which is like, no Hashtag separate life Hashtag separate life, Hashtag separate life. I would rather swiffer your weave droppings up. Then go to a party with those crazy bitches. Thanks. So then we hear this.

The war! The Lord! And it's Frank, washing a car. He's like... Oh, he believed the shit the Lord! The Lord! Look, it's crunch time, Lord's, you can't disappear Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa Wait, it's my arm to Lord's, it's my arm, it's my arm, wait

It's my arm, I'm not my lip Which is the hot attack arm, I don't even remember Bring me some peeps, Jokey, which is the Lord's The Lord's So he's washing his car You guys, if you can afford a Jag, you can afford a car wash. Okay? Like, honestly, don't you have better things to do? You're wealthy, okay?

You need to pay for that car. Go to work. How about that? So Frank is like, so I was talking to Teresa, and she asked me, how do you know you're not holding the Lord back okay You know because I would hate to think that I'm ever hold Holding hold on to Lord hold on you know what I'm holding back right now you got it one of the five first events Okay, you want to hold him back right now Beef jerky burps And my first meeting with Gabriel blowing at the

gates of heaven. Hold on to Lorshola. All right, I'm back. Honestly, she made me think. Lorsh is like, wow, Frank. Well, you know what, Frank, let me tell you this Frank, okay, I'm gonna be honest with you. It's a washer car. I hate when men make the women wash their car on these shows. I'm officially over it. I'm not gonna get over it, easy. Okay, so she's washing, it's like,

you know what, Frank, let me tell you this. I've never done anything for me. Okay, I don't even know what I want. What do I want? You know what I want? I want tiles that I want, but then do I want those or do I really want the tiles that you want? Because you trick me in the thinking that maybe I want. What do I want? You know what I want? I want tiles that I want, but them to I want those or do I really want the tiles that you want because you trick me

into thinking that maybe I want something that I don't want Frank. Do you understand what I'm saying? He's like Frank. Not really the Lord. All right. Like, we're going to get back together. We're not going to get back together. Huh. You know what Frank? See here's the thing. Me growing up, you know, I went from my mother's house to getting married having kids. Yeah. To walk into the living room, walking into the kitchen, walking into the living room. Into the kitchen. There's a circle.

Yeah. I picked up some pasta. I was watching my 600 pound life. There's a lady there. She said, waffles comfort me. You know, you're my waffles, Frank. What's her saying? Like what do you want from me?

Like seriously, that's it. I'm washing her car right now. Would I do that? No, do I want to wash the car? No, I don't want to fight cars. Like how would he drive? I would walk places, Frank, okay? But that's what I do for you.

And he's like, I don't understand, still. But, okay, keep dating two guys at the same time. Yeah. Like, what does this see? And then he like gets her with the hose. Then he sprays her with the hose and she's like, Frank, what are you doing? Huh?

What are you doing? He's like, well, this wouldn't be the first time I got you in here. I'm in the years, right, Dolores? What's out, I'm gonna squirt. Literal line from the show. I mean, this show's like the classiest ever. She's like, ha. So, Marge is having lunch on a water, which terrifies me,

because I know this is the Theresa meeting, and I don't want Teresa to be more confused. How are we doing this? It's a little water! Everyone's saying, so Teresa and Marge sit down, they get together and then I feel like you must have loved this waitress because they're talking this waitress comes by and she's like So sorry to interrupt Can I get you guys something to drink? I was like Ronnie hate this person right now

I hate those waiters on the shows because this is how they are when they know there's a camera. She's like Would you like a margarita? Like a Coca-Cola. It's like, okay, it's a real housewives of Jersey. Even the people on the real housewives of New Jersey don't get discovered. What do you think is going to happen with you? Yeah. So, they started talking about this whole fight. And I'm gonna say, you know, that was me as a waiter too, right? Okay, you're like, everything I complain about,

you know that I'm the waiter who's like, elbows on the table, asking you about your children. Please tell me you're not a waiter who gets on and it's got on his knee. That's not true. Oh, you're a little hypocrite. My his, got on his knee. That's what I was. Oh, you were. You were. You were. My part, my political party is hypocrites.

I will win president one day running on that. Yeah. So it was the fuck you want to do, not as I do or say. OK. So they started talking about Danielle and everything. And Theresa forced Danielle's side. And she's saying, I'm just saying that we're a tar like like like like like you know and you know she says that she really doesn't like how Margaret just dropped Danielle out of the blue so Margaret's like you know what you know what she's like you know you don't you don't know the evolution of what happened to us okay

I'm just like no I don't know what happened to you guys. I also don't know what evolution means. Yeah, yeah. I don't know the rest of the two, you know what happened. Blink, blink, blink, blink. And Teresa's still holding to her guns. We're like, you said about husband and somebody and I'm not my husband. And Marjana's like, what about what she said about my kids? I'm like, well, I mean, what you've said about your kid,

like your husband locked you in the closet. Like, your mom, I'm too fee to stand on to this argument. But still shut up, Teresa. You know, team March forever. Teresa basically explains her view on love. Yes. She explains her view on love. She's like, you know, I trust you

until you fuck me over unless you're my husband. Wow. In which case, I wait for until you fuck me over unless you're my husband. Yeah. In which case I wait for your ass to get deported, and then I fuck you up. Yeah. I mean, girl, this woman can buy time better than a Sydney Sheldon character.

I've never, I've read 800 page books starring Nicolette Sheridan, okay, that are as patient as tree. Like she is waiting and she's gonna get every damn book deal that comes down the pike, so good for you sister. So Marge is like, well, you know what, you want me to be honest with you, there was stuff that you was even before sweating.

Like I said, I was gonna go to the Lord's Hashtag and face event that we were all invited to. Yeah, we're gonna throw hats, we're gonna get mad, we're gonna do whatever and then she said, what even having common, that you cheated and they cheated and they cheated and they, oh, oh, oh, oh. She starts going on her thing and you just see Teresa trying to follow this.

Like, she's trying to remember what the hatchet event is. You know, she's just like, ah, she thinks it's an actual hat. She's like, ah. Yeah, so. So yeah, basically Teresa is like, you know what, Danielle's never done anything bad to me and you've never done anything bad to me.

So I just don't think the Danielle's evil person that you're painting around to be. I'm like, painting around to be. And so Marge, you'll figure it out and you see Teresa like, man, is that mean? You know, and then Marge is like, you know what, you know what, it's more important. Do you want to see children with cancer? Inter mean? You know, and then Marjord's like, you know what? You know it's more important.

Do you want to see children with cancer? Interorable clothes? No, me neither. I need my cancer to be entertaining. All right, I want a Super Mario cancer kid. I want a firefighter cancer kid, a unicorn. Come, come, it'll be fun. So they're all gonna go to this like cancer,

this children's cancer event thing. So then, but before we get to this, like, cancer, this children's cancer event thing. So then, but before we get to that, I really love the slow, rippling boo, by the way, I'm audience. Because it's not just one hard boo. It's like, started over there. And then, it's first, and was like, I should be mad at that. Is it when it was like a ripple of boo?

It's really important for us to, like, top the episode where we had to discuss the Holocaust to a live audience, like, children with cancer. Right. So now we go over to Jackie's house where her husband's like, coaching the kids and soccer, and they're like, can each other in the face. And I just like that Jackie's like, hey, kids,

like, don't do that. I feel like bleeding, you know? Yeah. My basic thought on this, I love Jackie. I love that she has that left and the way that she can to talk about stuff and that she'll take up the end of the body. And then, look, has there ever been a housewife who literally can write in a newspaper what a dick you are?

I mean, that's amazing. That's a big move. That's an amazing weapon. So I'm overall rooting for Jackie, but I don't need to see her with her litter of children playing. Well, I don't mind. Her kids are fine. I feel like this is a sad excuse for a season-long arc. She's like every three episodes, it's like, I have a sister.

And then this episode, she's like, I'm going to call her. She calls up, she's like, hi. You want to meet up? He's sister. All right. Bye. And it's two. All right. All right. And it's two storylines. Melissa has some pretend sister that her dad had not a fair.

It's two missing sisters. Trust me, if your sister was a little bitch when you were children, she's still a little bitch now, OK? Said like that does not change. Thankfully, my little sister is not a little bitch now, okay? Said like that does not change. Thankfully my little sister is not a little bitch and she wasn't a little bitch then either, you know? I'm still a monster. You see how these keep going?

It's the same people don't change, okay? You're gonna hear first. So now we go out in New York City, it's the day of the big event. Marge and her crew show up at this event space, et cetera, Lexi's there, Lexi's like, this is gonna be a tear jacker for sure! She's just started to eat a thunker. She's like playing a piano with Margaret. Aw, gee!

This is gonna be amazing! We have 150 of them kids up there. What are you gonna do, watchy? Marge, see what about it? I've been a bit of part of this. I don't even wanna say anything. I'm like, you're wearing glitter robe and my curlers in your hair and a full face of crib, okay?

And Margaret has her own weird storyline going on where she's trying to bring Jan and Brett back together. Like, this is weird storylines, just like thrown at us. I just feel like in general on any show, but especially Housewives, find new people to hate. I don't need you to hate your ex-husband. Hate a new husband that will soon be your ex-husband.

So we can be part of this history. And then we get our first, I feel like it's our first scene of the season at the end of the boutique. New Jersey is hot spot for fashion. You guys. Joe Gorga is such a prick. He's like putting his finger up his wife's butt and every like he's so gross. He's such a monster. Yeah. But he's not always wrong. Okay. Melissa's like, we need to update the site because they say we don't have red

dresses. Here's one. Here's one. That's her working. And then you see, you see like all the sides of like the Ross address for less, like racks. I recognize that shit. Okay. And then in the middle, there's a giant table of NVT shirts, which is what she's really selling. He's not really that wrong. Yeah. Still, keep your fingers to yourself. Listen, this is how Jeff Bezos started, you know, little boutique in Jersey. So yeah, they're my. Is that where we were? Oh no, girl, this is not the good part of the show where I'm like, wait, what are we talking about? LeBernan Shirley, what a bitch LeBern turned out to be just kidding. Well, wow, someone was really upset about that joke.

That was a death battle. That was someone was like, I am unsubscribing on iTunes right now. OK, nothing really happens except that Jackie Basie tells Melissa, you should tell Joe to stop disparaging you in front of the kids. That's basically it. Maybe it's going to be a VPT.

No one needs it. Yeah, I mean, it's, yeah, he's just stopped to dismiss. She's like, but he said that I only self-teach her. So I'm like, mm. But he should be nice to her about it in front of your kids, I guess. I mean. Yeah.

So, okay. No. All right, all right, all right. Okay, okay. So then we get to the thing and all the ladies start arriving and Margie doesn't want any attention at all It's like this silver and black with white and black cutouts like this whole this whole thing or Pattern pattern It was not it was jibade

Yeah, you know So Jam comes in, by the way, those of you who don't remember him, Jam is the one he used to be married to Margaret and locker in the closet when he was mad. It happens, you know. Look at all the shit we're not putting up with anymore, but then look at all the shit we are putting up with. Yeah. We're just like, oh, yeah, he locked her in the closet. OK.

What else happened? She left him. So he comes and marges. You want to be honest? Jan comes with his beautiful girlfriend. He happens to be Joe's ex-wife's best friend Are you following me? I mean, I mean

What a small word I mean there should be like a ride in Disneyland called it's a small withdrawal because you know what? It's like Jan and it's girlfriend and Joe And I just be little figurines of Jan. And it's girlfriend. And Joe, waving at people and about being like, it's small, well, after all. And she's invited the son that Jan hates. And so she's going to try and make them talk. But all they do is give each other dirty looks across the thing.

So she looks at Jan and she's like, you talk to Brett. You talk to Brett. And then she's like, we need to make that you talk to Brett, and then she's like, we need to make that face in me. I know I'm about to make best friends with Koot Hengus, and I'll leave it alone. All right, just leave it alone. So, so everyone starts,

go ahead, hangers. So everyone starts to show up. And, and people are showing up and, you know, Dolores has got there and she's, you know, Dolores is get there and she's talking about. I know, I'm doing the same thing. Because there's so much I see like looking through your nose. I know exactly where I am. Oh yeah.

Go, go, go, then. I started going, and then, and then I was like, that's where I am too, man. And then, and then, and then, and then. So anyway, so Dolores is like, you know what? I saw a side of Jennifer. I didn't know existed in Cabo. And I really didn't care to see it again.

Like Pebble tile. She was like a big walking Pebble tile. It's got to think about thick children, not drunk adults. I'm like, why can't it be about both, okay? Not watching a thick children show. So Margar is talking about that. She's saying like, you know what? Like Jennifer, like when she's service, she's fine. Like she's fine. She's not like cocktail Jen. You know, she's not watching a sick children show some are just talking about that she's saying like you know I like Jennifer like when she's so busy. She's fine like she's fine She's not like cocktail Jen you know, she's not like a Mexican. Mexico. I'm a anyway

But tonight though. I told her no drinking. Okay, this is a sophisticated event and as soon as she says this is a sophisticated event Teresa walks in She thinks she's at the auto zone. You got a carbonator in here. So Trey comes in and shows like, hey, Teresa, you want to eat? Baby, make out. You want to make out? This song is going to have shots at you. Wait, wait, wait, wait.

So they decided that, you know, Theresa can eat again, which God bless her. I love when someone gets off a diet, you know? It's like my favorite. Oh, yeah. Oh. I used to go to my AA meetings with my friend and then go outside to smoke at the very end

just so I could feel like I was saying, welcome back. Is everybody came out, you know? And that's all I feel with Teresa eating again. Sorry too much. Okay, so Melissa's like, when I see Jennifer, I am pissed, someone who goes for a glass and instinctually breaks it.

Look around. I know. You have any footage of your fucking child's chry christening that you would like me to play right now? Yeah. You hypocrite? Vote for me. Yeah. So, so Jennifer and Bill walk in. They've arrived.

And basically, so... And he does walk in my that. He's like, look at this party. I wish there were some streamers. And Jen is really nervous because now Jen's sober. So she's like, I don't know why everyone's mad. I just need to say I'm sorry. He's like, I don't know why everyone's mad. I just need to say I'm sorry. He's like, hmm, she has a bill are you hungry?

And he's like, hmm. And so Jackie's has been- Oh, I'm famished. Hmm. She's like, here, I got you some shrimp. And then she just like pulls over Jackie's husband's plate with these gigantic shrimp. Yeah.

With her like a fist. She goes, my husband with these gigantic shrimp. Yeah. But they're like a fist. She goes, my husband loves jumbo shrimp. So get his own damn jumbo shrimp. Yeah, she goes, she goes, you eat honey, and then she just walks off. That's cheap, babe. Ooh, I like mushroom, small, medium, large and jumbo.

Mmm, all sizes work. Archimbo! All sizes work. So the worst part for Bill is that he has to deal with the husbands. And by the husbands, I mean, Joe Gorgah. Yeah. Because Joe Gorgah wants to shift somebody with a wine glass so bad. Like, that's all he's on this show for, you know, he's like the other housewife. So I'm watching them kind of interact and so far it's okay so now Jen's apology to her yeah first she goes

to Dolores and she's like how are you we left it so crazy last time well my son went off to college he came back for the summer but then he's back at college and Frank I think he's in Florida I don't know really where he is I don't know like it's hard to say I go from the kitchen to the living room to the kitchen to living room sometimes I kitchen to living room. Sometimes I call David, I call my mom. She's eating cookies for breakfast. I don't know what's going on, Jennifer.

Yeah, but then when you yelled at me, like I got that maybe you were just defending your brand. Well, you know, you started out, you know. I'm a Viserated. What do you say? I'm a Viserated. I'm a Viserated. What do you say? I'm a Viserated. I'm a Viserated, Frank. That's it.

I'm a Viserated. And she's like, you know what? It's not that I was defending my friends so much. It's so much it's like you broke a glass. And when you break a glass and you put it up to somebody, that's a no-no, okay? You don't want to do that. Someone's going to get hurt, okay?

Nice to get hurt. No, I got a call up. Someone's going to have any band-deeds. I go up to the office. I got to find a band-aid, okay? You don't want to do that. Someone's gonna get hurt, okay? Nice to get in there. I got a call up, someone's gonna be like, someone have any band-eats, I gotta go up to the office, I gotta find a band-eat, I gotta wrap it around, I gotta call Frank, Frank is the seat to do when Frank has to tell me, although his advice is no longer safe, legal advice, because he got this barred, another story, you know?

Jennifer's like, uh... Yeah, Jennifer's like, I'm sorry, the aunt, you know? She's like, I get that, just don't be mad. She goes, she Dolores tells us, in Paterson, if you hurt, and you don't hurt that person harder, then you better get the fuck out of there. And I'm like, fucking Jersey. Yeah.

Yes. I love when that side of Dolores comes out. It's like so exciting. Yeah. She's like, but then we get over it quick, you know? So I'm like, do you want a spring roll that's made out of cheeseburgers? This party. Okay, so then Dolores says like this, we're good, but there's one other person you got to talk to.

Her name is in Teresa. I'm gonna shock everybody here and say, Melissa. Melissa, you got to talk to Melissa. All right, it's the Laura's. Yeah. So she's- Because Teresa was busy scouting on the buffet. Did you cast that? She's like, all right, I ate everything over here. I'm gonna go check out that side of the buffet. I was like, yes, this is how I connect the pizza. Teresa was like Pac-Man.

Like anything she's doing, she's like, oh! Oh! Taking those cheeseburgers down. So Jen goes up to, she goes up to Melissa and she's like, can I talk to you? And Melissa does this thing, like even though I'm fully on Melissa's side in this fight, Melissa does this thing that I think is so obnoxious. She goes,

are you in a commood? Have you had a cocktail? Yeah, have you had a cocktail? Listen here, meth face. Yes, I have. And no, I'm not. What does I have to do with anything? And no, I'm not. What does that have to do with anything? Only sober people can apologize. I'm not really sure about the rules on this show. If I didn't get drunk, you'd never get an apology from my ass. I'm telling you that right now.

Then, Uncle Tito. So they have a whole conversation. Everything's fine. Everything's fine between them. So then we cut over to Joe Gorgher who's talking to Bill. And he's like, hey, hey, hey, hey, here we go. Hey, Dr. Bill, huh? I don't need any work, right? And he's like, hmm, you're a perfect man. You can be more gorgeous. Round pecks, firm buttocks, small little eyes, perfection, mm. And then Joe Gorgas, I know you don't say that to anyone

because listen, you can't have a house that big in favor of if they face like shit is. You know what I mean? And he's like, so your wife, so Joe starts to try another white fight. Joe is in a fight with like oh Wow, what thank you that was just so lovely. Thank you Thank you. Thank you so much

My god what that girl this is our version of a striker. Oh girl This is why we got a set of time limit on the show. Okay. I'm not the only one up here getting wasted. Thank you. Okay, so thank you for that. And that was an awesome caftan, a gorgeous one, by the way, they just run by. Okay, so Gorgas trying to start fights and he's like, so what about your wife? I heard your wife. This is crazy shit, bro. I'm crazy shit. He's like, oh, bro, the crazy shit It's like oh bro Yeah, there was some wild crazy shit Mmm, you're my next door buddy bro Now listen, I spent six years trying to get her to stop having tequila And then she said, yeah, the killer

I was like, girl friend, the killer, you've been naughty down south of the border. Mm. His actual technical quote is, I spent six years trying to keep her away from the killer. So I was like, What? That tequila must have been all that in a bag of chips.

Mmm. That's five A's and Y's. Was it Reposato or I knew. So then we get what we're here for, which is kids looking adorable in their new costume garbs and giving really cute species about having cancer. I'm not gonna make fun of that, even me. Of course, not.

For back, everyone should go support that charity, whatever it is. And also, I will say that March does learn from the best. Like Lisa Vanderpump doesn't take ugly dogs. March takes the cutest kids and puts them up there. March have a casting for this. It was really nice. Listen to you. Maybe one day. Maybe I got a round of the Superman.

They were so cute. It was a great idea. It's a great idea for charity. I'd rather get a gift card. Is that too mean to say? It's a child with cancer. I'd rather be like, thank you for this hospital gown, but I would rather have a gift card. Is that too mean to say, like it's a child with cancer? I'd rather be like, thank you for this hospital gown, but I would rather have a best-by-card. There's a new switch. But you know, that's nitpicking. Let's be honest.

Anywho. So there's like this attempt to put a bow on Margaret's side story where she's like, all right, Jan did you talk to Brad? Did you talk to Brad? It's like, no, I winked at him. Okay, they winked. I was like, that's it?

That's all we're going to get that they winked at each other or we're dead, Jan. But that's like dude love, you know? Yeah. I feel like that's Texas dad and not my dad, my dad's not like that. He's just like, I love you. He'll just tell me. But I feel like in general, Texas dad love is like, you did good today, son.

Like when you're 90, you finally hear it, you know? It's like my kushla. Yeah, no, my dad's not that typical Texas dad. He's like, I love you, you're great. Would you like to be a ballet dancer? Sure, go for it. You wanna make rockets and crayons? Great. How can we support you, you know?

So, basically everything is pretty copacetic. There were some beefs, everything's fine. And you know what? Jennifer's going to have an anniversary party next week. And by the way, Danielle Stop is going to be there. Oh my God. The way the girls reacted when she's like, and you know, I'm going to have Danielle there. and every single one of them is like And Jennifer ominously is like I just want to have a good drama three night overlooking the best view east of Oklahoma, okay Bram is small nothing more scenic Bram is small, nothing more scenic. So that's going to be a very early season finale, but you know, Jersey has sucked for a long time.

I've made it. Okay, they've earned their short season. And hopefully now they've earned their long season. You got in the coming next week scenes. Yes. They can start, they start parting over there. And Joe is dancing and some guy goes, he dances like a stripper.

Yeah. Do you really think someone's paying that man to put fake marble in their bathrooms? Think about it. Yeah. I'm still waiting. I mean, Joe Gorgah has to have a dick pick. Okay. It has to be out there.

And why has it not been leaked? This is like a huge injustice of the internet age. I've looked it up so many times, Joe Gorgia Dick-Pick. And who else is so excited for the season finale next week when Marge and Herjo push Marty into the pool? Marty, he did not know what he was gonna involve with. And you guys love that Daniel is still living in that fucking house, I love it.

She is stayed, she left Marty, so for those of you who don't know, Mom, Dad. This lady married a rich dude, she's horrible. So she's with this rich dude, and everyone's like, this won't last. She's like, oh, damn you. So then of course, they divorced in like a month, and then she kicks him out of the house

and stays in his house. That's how you do it Pretty much water is right. That's like blue can trail blue can trail style you guys we have to give a huge thank you to Leon Lockin mama D rich and all your gas and your parents and family and this special shout out to a league Hopefully we'll see a bunch of you guys tomorrow night Thank you guys so much And if you are VIP, oh yeah the VIP meet and greet just wait and hear everybody else We'll see you at the round Good night everyone! Hey, bitch, hey, bitch, if you don't know me, you're welcome to blow me back.

Hey, bitch, hey, bitch, everyday is a parade, don't keep me trying to shake. I can see the clouds running face and bucket needs, but I pulled them all, cause when I play, I went down. People might think, what the fuck, I said, I'm the man. I asked me lots of questions, I answered everyone. Hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, hey, bitch, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, bitch, bitch, hey, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, hey, bitch, hey, bitch, hey, hey, hey, bitch, hey, hey, bitch, hey, guys, people might think, what's up, I'm the man. I asked you lots of questions. I answered everyone. Hey, Batch. Hey, Batch. Hey, Batch. You pretend not to love me, but don't you hear about me, Batch. Hey, Batch.

Hey, Batch. You can try to hate me, but I still have right to be bored. Hey, prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or, you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. Bye.