Watch What Crappens - RHONY: Every Rose Has Its Corn(hole)
Episode Date: September 1, 2017The Real Housewives of New York wrap up their third reunion with lots of anal talk. Also, Ramona leaves us with a Greatest Hit Childhood Origin Story to explain why she didn’t know what sex... was. Enjoy! **Live show in LA with guests Jeff Lewis, Gage Edwards and Jenni Pulos is this Saturday Sept 2! Grab tickets at http://watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts!
It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates.
Cameras off! Voice only!
Launching during Pride!
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We'll see you there I've got a crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, crab, Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors Kelly Grant Cindy
Burgess Gerson. Just saying. Kelly Barlow and Christy Dowerty we love you girls!
Hello and welcome to Watch what crap ends. A podcast about all that crap we
love to talk about on Yeo Bros. I'm Ronny Karen from the RezPrix Vacheler Rost and here I am with
the gorgeous talented hardworking and extremely organized taskmaster Ben Mandelker of the
B side blog in the band to Blinda Hello Bean. Hello, hello, I do love organizing especially
as we are just 48 hours away from our live showing L.A. for people who have questions about that live show.
You go, we put up a little thing on our, the Facebook group, WatcherCrapins Live and Loving It,
which is attached to our Facebook page, WatcherCrap, Facebook.com slash WatcherCrapins.
A bunch of questions. One of the main questions that we're getting asked is how early do you have to be there?
You don't have to be there.
I, so we took a tour of the theater
and the theater was beautiful and it's big.
And one thing that people need to know
is that it's like a standing room only venue
because it's a music venue.
So like don't worry that like,
oh, I have to be there early to grab an amazing seat
because there aren't no seats.
It's, there's room for everyone to stand.
And the space is big enough that if you're in the back of the room, you're going to see
the stage just fine.
So like, don't worry about that.
It'll be great.
There's room for everyone.
Like, don't freak out.
I'm freaking out.
But the merchandise is limited.
So if you do want to get merchandise, you may want to get arrived a little bit earlier
so that way you get it before it sells out, if it does.
Yeah, that'll probably go on sale like an hour before
the show or something.
And the music venue is so cool.
And it's so pretty.
The wallpaper is designed on guitar picks,
like it's a pattern of guitar picks.
One of which is our color.
It's our watch what crap is color.
So it matches our merch table, which we're so excited about
because that's like the gayest shit you can't plan.
But it's also kind of my decor
because I actually bought guitars to learn them
and then gave them up like everything else
I could obsessed with for a week.
And so actual guitars are the guitar the decor in
my house that hang on my walls and I don't play them. And our show is that it decor using
guitar picks and I don't play them. So it's like a wonderful way that I haven't learned
music celebrated in two places.
Exactly. But yeah, we're really really excited. The theater, it's like a real venue. I mean,
not that the other ones were not real, but it's one thing, like a comedy club feels very
much like, it's like a little, it's like a little platform you sit on and everyone's
sitting around and tables. It's still even the Gotham, which had 300 people sort of felt
intimate, but this was like, whoa, this is a theater. There's like a balcony. So a balcony bar talk about us.
It was, it's really cool.
I'm, I'm excited.
It's like the most grown up thing we've ever done in our lives.
It really is.
And now we have a special announcement.
So Andy, I want to tell you that I'm so impressed because it's someone
named Louisa's birthday.
Okay. I love Louisa and her brother got her a birthday present of that I'm so impressed because it's someone named Luis's birthday. Okay?
I love Luis and her brother got her a birthday present of saying happy birthday.
Okay?
Some people have nice brothers like Charles.
I don't have a brother like that, but some people do.
So happy birthday to you.
You have a good brother that didn't ruin your childhood.
I hope you liked my birthday message.
I have to work on my delivery, okay?
I need delivery lessons.
You know what?
I need to journal, because it's not delivery, okay?
But you know what I can say?
I don't care about my delivery.
All I have to say is happy birthday, Louisa, okay?
At least you didn't have to hear about your birthday on page 6, okay?
Seriously, literally, you're even making somebody else's birthday wish about you.
My God, like you're a monster, like you're serious, you're literally a monster.
I don't want to be your friend because I'm like not friends with monster,
but I want you to be a friendly monster.
Just like, just like being in the room, turn on the light sometimes,
turn them off, like scare me a little bit, but like in a fun way, okay?
Would you believe it, girls?
This Louis is his birthday.
Or this was yesterday.
I hope she had a wonderful time
It didn't fall into too many bushes, but what a great time that was when I fell in a bush
Happy birthday, Louisa
Yeah, your brother Charles yeah, we meant to do it on your birthday, but we're lazy assholes
So today's your birthday for us. We're very forgetful people. Okay, God, is that me?
Like seriously? That's me. I don't even know if I would want to be friends with me. Okay? Yeah. Oh,
Ramoner, I was really sad last night with Real Housewives of New York because I was thinking,
this is it. This is like the end of Real Housewives of New York for the season. Like, yes, we're
gonna talk about scary island this weekend.
But that's an old one.
Like, I really love this season.
And it's over.
And then the commercial came on for the sit down with the Wanda, the steps.
And he had appreciated if we could do this in a backyard on some.
Yeah.
The sag harbor sit down.
Andy, please take a seat in my Adirondack chair.
It reminds me of times when they were happier with Alex and the children.
It looks like a regular straw chair, wicker Andy, but it's not.
It's made from durable plastic, so I can just clean it with a hose.
Can you believe it?
Just the way Tom cleaned me with a hose.
Would you believe it, Andy?
We're broken up.
And you know, the
wind tell me how many times did he go down on you? Well, how about you tell me
this? Couldn't you have shaved Andy? I wasn't married. It would have been
considered. Andy just shows up with like this five day of growth. He's like, yeah
I've just casual. I'm in white linen pants, I haven't shaved or taken a shower
and I've gotten my booger, come I got.
So really into this, thanks for having me out here.
Louanne.
He's like, we make this quick,
I need to get to a lobster roll at Bosphoics
down the street.
Tonight, I'm always owning it.
Okay.
Wait, you can sit on the world because you own it.
They're gonna also talk about periods,
Ramona's daughter's life,
and the Wann ends the coming up by going,
Ouch.
It's good metaphor for her.
Ouch.
So we open with a Sonya segment.
Don't we actually? So we open with a Sonya segment. No, no, not quite. We actually open up with Andy saying, so there's been a lot of pillow talk on real house
hours of New York, but this season was a lot.
Look at all the dirty things that you said, and because you guys like to beat around the
bush.
Well, forgive me for thinking that would be a sonia segment
Then it was literally five minutes of every double entendre or dirty word they said
I mean talk about stretching for content this thing this it was going on and on and on like look at your boobs
You like doing anal that it was I thought it'd be like a 32nd thing. I swear this thing went on for two minutes at least. Well, I like that you could you use
the word stretching out with all this vagina talk because some of it of course was Sonya getting her
vagina tightened and she's like there's a difference between a vagina and the inside canal.
Whatever to you. What was she saying? I don't know. She was saying the joining us on the inside. Generals are on the outside.
John's cucumber dick. Which I don't think anybody believes.
So you're being allergic to sperm, hairy, duping sperm,
carol being a bottomer, anal sex. And then I don't have
anal sex.
Lamy. I could do it all to me.
She sounds like a guy from Jersey Shore.
Yeah.
She clearly this entire clip package was edited by Andy.
And I'm surprised that when they didn't come out of it,
Andy just wasn't sitting there just like doubled over and laughter, you know,
like they talked about anal sex.
It's just like, it just was so, I don't know.
It was excessive.
I wasn't like offensive,
it just was like, this isn't interesting.
Yeah, it's a lot of,
a lot of cringing it,
thinking of Carol doing anal a lot, pretty much.
Well, a tinsley was,
tinsley was like,
I have to apologize to my experts
talking about anal sex because that was something that's private and like, I need to apologize and Andy's like, so did you hear from him
about that? And she's like, yeah, I heard a lot. I'm like, oh, so what gets this guy mad
is not her going on national TV and talking about how he physically abused you. What gets
him mad is people knowing that he likes anal sex. I'm Beth and he's like, yeah, well, he's gonna think that's cute.
Like what you think he wants out?
Like, hi, you know, this guy loves anal sex.
Hi, good to meet you, hi.
Like Beth and me has entered pure cat skills mode for this third part.
She's not doing anything, but like reciting sheky green lines.
I'm opening for Jackie Mason, huh? doing anything, but like reciting sheky green, you know, lines.
I'm opening for Jackie Mason, huh?
Like what happened to a handshake? Huh? What are you going to shake an asshole?
Like seriously?
Like how do you even do that?
Like boom, I winked at you.
That means we're friends.
Okay.
So Sonia actually takes top or side a little bit.
And she's like, I think you don't talk about the families on
the television.
You don't bring in the families.
Godfather, what's going on?
Good father.
What's the matter?
I grew up with those people.
I got a bookie, huh?
Like what do you, a quarly on?
Or you like a Godfather's Pizza kind of girl?
Did you have Godfather's Pizza growing up?
No, we didn't have that.
We didn't have that.
We went on a field trip there and watched the make-dow.
I'll never forget it.
Well, you know what I love is the Godmother, the sandwich over at Bay City's Delhi in Santa Monica.
You ever had that?
You ever had that?
No.
Yeah, I have it.
Yeah, I have it.
Wait, wait, what not me?
Like, seriously, like, is this what we're going to do?
What's the Godmother have, like, more anal sex?
Like, yeah, it's like, you know what it is?
You know what it is?
It's like in my boss, except the sandwich, okay?
And like, it's going to rule your life, okay?
Like, you never talk against the sandwich, because the sandwich rules your life. It's the best sandwich ever. Like, honestly, I can't. Like, it's got the works. And sandwich, okay? And it's gonna rule your life, okay? Like you never talk against the sandwich because the sandwich rule your life.
It's the best sandwich ever.
Like, I can't, like it's got the works.
And by the works, I mean everything.
It's gonna kill everyone.
Like, it's gonna kill Sonny, it's gonna kill Fredo.
It's gonna kill everyone.
It's not even the mob boss.
It's the mob boss, like Sonny's vagina.
Like seriously, if you've seen that thing,
it's like growing hair like a beaver in a dam.
So anyway, then we get a little,
I made a line in my notes like okay, we've
Compared this to the godfather
So we are gonna move on now, but no and he's like and then
It was more fucking
Yeah, yeah, so yeah, so you bring her fight to this she's like finally
It's my time to bring my fight to the stage and she's yeah
I wasn't even the one who had anal with the pirate in the greenhouse. Remember Carol,
you wrote me a three page letter talking about how it wasn't me who had anal in the greenhouse.
Carol's like, well, Siri, just, Siri just runs on and on if you let her. She's like, this
is what happens if you put dial soon. Yeah. She thinks everything's
Nepali.
And about Secky, uh, Secky Frank over there. Second, Frank over there.
Second.
It's like, what do you email leaks? Like what do you leak in the anal? What is the anal
leaking?
Yeah, you know, it's like it's not wiki leaks. Yeah, you know what it is? It's like, it's anal leaks.
It's anal because your butt is leaking
from like all the pirate butt sex you're having.
Hey.
What is this?
I can't like, I'll see if I hear any more of it.
Like, it's like, you know, it's a wide open canal.
Like, I can't, it's like the novel river.
You know what?
It's like, where are the pyramids?
Because they should be, it's just like a big river
going into your back right now.
I'll see, I can't, like, where's your giant up, huh?
It's like that part of a volcano where it just rained so hard that finally it
makes a big gaping hole.
And you're like, I never thought it could get bigger.
And then it does.
Your parts have like lightning in them.
You know, it's like one of volcano like a wraps and makes its own weather.
It's like, that's what you're far.
It's because you're, you're, you're your, you're about to also big.
It's like a volcano.
It's like, I'm saying, hell, it's mountain, mountain, mountain, Sonia's, huh?
Crack a Sonia.
Oh, so Andy makes this gross face
because he's talking about
Sonia saying she's allergic to Harry Spurm.
And I'm like,
what are you making the pain face for?
You've made this entire first 10 minutes about Adel.
Why are you acting like?
And why you asked this question?
Like literally no one cares how she would know
if she's allergic to Harry Spurm.
No one wants to think about Harry Spurm.
They just wanted to show her that, like,
wrestling mask facial thing again.
And he goes, I have a question.
Is oral sex not sex?
And Vermont is like, well, I didn't know, okay?
I grew up Catholic.
And my father would say, like, when you go out tonight,
no, in a course, okay, you little whore.
So to me, in a course with sex, you know, we would have oral sex.
Like the toothbrush.
You put it or else you get it or will be.
And you're like, what is that second base?
Is that sex now?
Like before Bill Clinton, I thought that, okay?
One time, Avery came home with an oral B toothbrush.
I said, no Avery, you were gonna go to a good school, okay? Next time, I want you to come back with an oral B2 brush. I said no Avery you were gonna go to a good school, okay?
Next time I want you to come back with an oral A, okay?
Now everything sucks, I guess. So I guess I have a lot of sex. It's sex isn't like anything to do with sex
Like what is what is like you want to make a sandwich now? What I had a sandwich when I was little so I guess I had sex like what do I know?
What do I know? I just know about cold what do I know? What do I know?
I just know about cold cuts.
I know about ham.
I know about turkey.
I know about baloney.
But guess what?
Baloney's not even a real meat, okay?
It's not like real sex.
Baloney is the oral sex of cold cuts, okay?
That's why I'm...
That's why I regret dating that guy named Volcano.
Ha ha ha ha ha. Now wonder my dad called me all those names.
I didn't know, okay?
Did you know there's actually a city called Belonia and I thought that's rude.
Why would you name a city after a fake meat?
It's not right.
Those people deserve a real name, but they can't have it now because now they're just
baloney and no one believes what they say.
They say, you know what I say when I you speak I say you're from baloney and you're full of baloney
But what if I don't want to be full of baloney? Okay?
Okay
I really appreciate a Ramona doing an impersonation of our impersonation of Ramona. That was really great a part of do that
I mean she hit it on the nail like our
Father in there see had the whole thing I'm Catholic and when I grew up my father said
Yeah, I mean it little the little line was I grew up Catholics for my father
Oh, we said you can't have any course so my first boyfriend when I was 17
We would have oral sex to me. I thought I wasn't having sex. I was like that you're literally doing our impersonation
If she had said Geraldine Parsonsmith, I would have like just fallen over. I'd be like, oh my God.
We have manifested this lady. She's a Tulpa.
So then we get our golden montage of Ramona fighting with Bethany, starting to sit with her and my favorite. Are you kidding me?
Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me?
Beth and me. I don't remember it being four times. Me neither, but I can also imagine that
by the fourth time we were just like so overwhelmed with joy that we like Ramona were in like
a reverse-bloind rage. We didn't we didn't hear the fourth one because we were like opening our gift making app on the computer.
Oh my god.
This is gift gold.
At that point, I think I was just like tearing off my face and revealing a black void beneath it.
Oh my god. It's like Sony's vagina to that mask.
Seriously. Oh my god, it's like Sony's vagina to that mask. Seriously, man. We're all weak.
Have the salmon.
So Bethany and Ramona going at each other.
All of this stuff was just classic Ramona.
But Bethany's like, I don't even want you on my trip.
Well, it's a group trip.
Okay.
So then I just won't go on to kill a thing if you don't want me to, okay.
So the question is, why did Ramona bring up
that article in the first place? And she has this whole convoluted answer. She's like,
well, my friend Nicole, she just went to permuta and turns out the men there don't wear pants.
They wear shorts. And she said to me, I just saw that they have shorts there. And I said, you
should read more. you should read the newspapers
You be up unaware of these things Nicole so Nicole went read the newspaper and she came back and she said look
What I read in permuted times Bethany is in a hardcore pornography movie and I said whoa that's crazy
And Bethany's like uh, yeah, okay, okay. Well that article out like six months before, like you weren't permuted and she's like,
ah, Bethany's going off and Ramona whips out her phone case,
which is like black and white stripes for that guy.
And she's like, well, I told my friend on Snapchat,
said, tell me when you told me about that article with Bethany
because it maybe happened in the permuted triangle. I don't know, they're gonna come from me, I need evidence. And Bethany because it may be happening to Bermuda Triangle. I don't know.
They're gonna come from me on the evidence and Bethany is like, look, but whatever. It was what the
intention of taking me to a public place in front of cameras to like do it there. And that was just stupid.
That was wrong. She's like, no, let me read you the snapchat. Let me read you the snapchat.
My friend, who's a little deer with hearts that fly all over his head said
It's like Jesus Christ Ramona. So Ramona basically got in trouble then texted her friend
So she could have a screenshot to bring to the reunion. You see how fucking sick these things are and I love it
Exactly. She's like I need to live read lessons
Do they give them I need to live read last look?
I lost my whole mojo because she was upset at me,
which I can understand and retrospect, but I didn't understand,
and it made me act out even worse.
I just need to live read lessons like how do those people at GrubHub do it?
Don't understand.
When she sent me that article, I'm with Avery, and I'm like,
oh my god, I hope everything's okay with Brynn.
I hope no one is saying anything, okay?
Well, I could think about and bring you to let's Brynn.
She should have gotten 20% of the trip because that's what it cost my brain, okay?
And Brynn says, whatever, whatever, you're full of shit.
Like I'm so sure you're just living for me You just care huh?
You just care?
Ha ha ha.
You know what better than me you're quicker with the way okay?
Like you're quick with that you're always gonna win cuz you're so quick with with okay on quick with I'm a good person
Okay
Everyone just starts cracking. It's like the it's like the laugh track for the big bang theory. It's like
I swear on my daughter's life that the without the fucking truth, okay
And I would die for my daughter right here, okay
I would literally fly a plane into the permutor triangle and wave goodbye to Nicole at the Bermuda and wave
goodbye to Avery and stand by my trute as it went down into the abyss.
Okay?
If there was a genie and I got three wishes, I would say genie.
I wish that my daughter wasn't there when she heard that Bethany was a slutty porn
star whoreographer.
And also I wish that Bethany's daughter didn't have a life
ruined by her mother being a slutty pornography making lady. And three, I wish I
knew the Bologna sandwiches were just sex. Hey, whoa, I bet you didn't know this,
but you can actually order Bologna sandwiches on postmates because they know how to
have a good delivery. Like Bethany, Bethany knows how they deliver Bologna real well, okay?
Yeah, you should work for post hates post hates
You know what you need to work for you know you need to work post-cac that's me for
Post-cac because you're full of cac and you just deliver cac all the time just like bunch of seamen all over me
That's what you like going Bermuda just seamen everywhere get that handy seamen. He's like
Well, I had about
so
Bethany Bethany goes off on this like diet tribe of
Ramona's past offenses
Remember the bridge remember the bridge
Alamo
Sorry, I don't remember the Alamo I'm so remember every single time I went to hearts in Alamo and enterprise. I'm sorry Bethan
Don't shoot the high message because new phones are expensive, okay?
That's the way the crumbles make cookies, okay?
Listen, I don't cry over spilled coffee, okay?
Bethan just is going off on everything that's ever happened in anybody's life.
Like she blamed Ramona for hanging
or for crucifying Jesus.
Like she really went there and Ramona's like,
okay Bethany, okay, Whit, okay.
Okay, Whit lady.
I own it though, that's the difference.
It's like, I see you can shut on the universe
and you just say I own it and that's okay.
It's like, well, you know, and then Bethany says, are you do you ever name it? What did I ever do to you?
Ramona singer and she's like I don't remember like I didn't even remember the blow jumps were sex
Like how am I gonna remember back that far? I'm not like you with that remembering
I
Come from a place of kindness. That's why I have as many friends as I do. A lot of friends
like Nicole who goes to Bermuda and reads all the stories about you Bethany being in Bermuda
Hustler magazine, okay? Well, the difference is children. It's okay, Louam. So, uh, she's like,
by the way, no one bring up my daughter's DUI, please.
Because that would be completely disrespectful and it happened on my property.
Yeah.
Okay.
So it's Romana, just jealous of Bethany, guys.
What do you think, Ben?
What would be your guess?
Obviously, yes.
No, why would I be jealous?
I'm proud of her.
I love successful women. For example, I was self-made by 30 her 37
Yeah, they come are still commerce. Okay Andy
I also like before that when Ramon was getting all mad at Bethany like she's trying to turn on Bethany
She's like don't make up stories that I did something to be malicious and to barris you first of all
You don't even get embarrassed. So how could I even embarrass you in the first place of Bethany there?
Who did you own embarrassment game? You should be embarrassed by that, but you can't be as stated in the rules of the embarrassment game, okay?
And then Andy's like, well, skinny girl tweeted at you.
It's like a good, we're letting skinny girls tweets be read on the air.
How come the actual human beings don't get to read their tweets?
Yeah.
Yes, skinny girl was like, because Beth, because remember in Vermont, Ramona had said that
she doesn't like, she didn't want to drink skinny girl to drink skinny girl wine or something like that.
And she goes, it's okay, we don't like you either.
And so the bethins, you don't have any right.
So what?
You brought me hummus when I was bleeding out.
Thank you very much.
But you don't have a right to criticize me.
You sold half a dozen bottles of wine.
You don't have the right to criticize my brand.
I'm like, actually, she really does because you have made this brand and you're voicing
on everyone.
And everyone's allowed to have an opinion on this shit.
It's just not nice if we're to do it,
but she's allowed to Bethany
and it's like kind of obnoxious
that you are pulling rank because obviously your brand
is significantly better than Ramona Pino Grisho.
But,
you're doing it for secret.
Yeah, she's like, oh yeah, well,
she sold like a couple of bottles of wine last year.
So, you know, I can understand why you can't be happy for other people
It's like Jesus Christ. Where are you always allowed to go so low and bring everybody to the bottom?
And then you're shocked when they don't like you, you know, well, we don't like you either a moment
Yeah, and the tweet after was Bethany you're wonderful
So Bethany is like you can't be happy for other people. You just can't be and most I am generally happy
I was like real convincing Ramona. I sounded like a really happy lady there. Carol's like then why do you lash out
The point is to learn from mistakes because that's what makes us better human beings
Also just say thank you when a man opens the door for you.
It's called manners.
It'd be considerate.
And Ramona's, let's see here.
Oh, now I'm talking about the way I'm talking about it.
Oh, well, I've been there with Ramona.
And you know, the problem is she says she's sorry
and thinks it's forgiven.
And Ramona goes goes I can take that
All except yeah
Mirio always says that about me, okay?
So then we come into the drug
Confrontation and he's like well he gets like his we're about to talk about anal sex again face
Yeah, but he's like had you taken any pills pills? You know, any antidepressants?
She's like, pills.
What are you kidding?
What are tic-tacs pills now?
Oh my God, well then fine.
Then I, I took tic-tacs and had baloney.
So I'm a pill popping sex addict, am I?
Okay, is that what you want me to say?
And you're just like, I didn't realize how bad it was.
I was so busy trying to fix the paint in Ramona's room
I was like I was a blind rage. It was a blind blind rage, okay?
Tasted like melons like a blind melon
So Andy says
You know pickles goes missing leave it up to Sonya to take in another broken brat in her curling iron
So then it's the tensley and Sonya thing which
Oh
I just like I just like
Okay, and now tinsley and
Did I skip do I skip something?
No, it's just like I'm just like sitting here like going through my notes like okay cross-hop cross-hop cross-hop cross-hop
Oh you did what did I skip? My last time that was,
was Bethany arguing about an eye depressants or whatever,
the pills that Ramona did or not take.
Well, Bethany did say,
some, yeah, you took,
some you said you took as an ex.
And then some you just looks up like, did I?
Either way, somehow at the end of this whole,
like Bethany and Ramona thing that we've been listening
to for 10 minutes where they're screaming at each other, but he's like, I'm not angry
at you.
I just don't want to be close to you.
I'm just like, boy, I don't want to be close.
We went to things and it's been like 10 years and like, it's not like I don't, it's not like I hate you. I just, it's like I don't, I don't like, like, like you, not like, to not like, I'm not
like you.
Well, that's okay because some people are deserving of hummus and some people aren't.
And now I know why waste hummus and say, yeah, well, thanks for the container.
To be fair, I did bring you Sabra, which is kind of the best one.
I think other friends may have brought you Athena's and that's not as good as Sabra.
So maybe you might want to reconsider how much you want to not like me.
Okay.
Good luck.
Finding someone to read books in the other room while you're in another room feeling sick.
Okay.
I sat there and I smelled your sabre of breath, okay?
And it wasn't nice, it was very garlicky,
and tastes a little bit like poinets,
because I got you the special ones with poinets on top,
and it had a little bit of smell of some cayenne pepper, too, okay?
But I didn't say a thing, because I'm a good friend,
and that's why I have so many other friends,
that's why I was self-made seven years
before you were self-made, okay?
Mm-hmm. Oh. Before we go on to Tinsley and Sonia, you know, we are doing this really awesome giveaway
for Orbits at our live show because Orbits is doing this whole thing called the middle
seat selfie. Am I guess saying it right? It's a middle seat. Yeah, middle seat selfie. Am I guess saying it right? It's a middle seat, yeah, middle seat, middle seat
selfie switch takes, which is this really cool that they're doing, cool thing that they're doing.
We're in basically if you are like stuck in the middle seat in your flight or just like a park bench
or on a bus or really anywhere, if you take a selfie and then there's this whole thing where you like
you have to follow them on Instagram or Twitter and you have to tag it with hashtag
middle seat selfie sweepstakes
when you share it
Then you could win something crazy like two first class vouchers and a thousand dollars in or bucks
Not used to study war bucks. Yeah, so and we both use or actually use orvits as well all the time
I just got my Chicago hotel there
For way cheaper
than the actual hotel was trying to charge my ass online. It's like the use you sir. I'm going
to look on Orbits and they were like you could be saving this much money and you've also got
$49 in Orbits bucks. Yes. So since it is the middle of our podcast right now, we are sort of in the metaphorical middle seat
of our podcast.
So we decided to help promote this really cool thing.
We are doing, introducing a new segment called
the Crappens Middle Seat, where we imagine
what it must be like to sit, be in the middle seat
between two Bravo Lebrides on a flight.. So when real housewives of New York,
should we do do some real housewives of New York? I think so. Which by the
way, this is probably not going to be very much different from what you've
just been listening to. Okay, who do you want to be? You tell me.
I feel like it's got a, we're either going to be a mix of like Ramona, Luana, Durinda,
or Bethany.
So you just pick one.
Okay, I'll be Durinda.
Okay.
I'll be Luana since we've been doing a lot of Ramona.
How about that?
I'll be Luana.
Okay.
Okay.
Which seat would you like?
I'll take the window seat. Okay. I'll be in the aisle. I like feeling confined
Excuse me, Milpat. Durinda, Durinda, would you like a cocktail? This woman is asking you if you're like a cocktail breakfast? Yeah, yeah, I love that. Yeah
Over easy
She doesn't know where she is. She'll have a bloody Mary make that a double and I'll have a tequila
Here hold on excuse me excuse me while Dorenda. Here's your bloody Mary. Gonna take your bloody Mary. Hey, Lailie
That's gonna about bloody. I stepped my hand
Look at it. Look at it. If you were a palm reading and you were reading my hand
Who will you say? What will you say?
Well, if I'm looking at your palm if I can brush off this blood for a moment, oh, I'm
sorry, I'm sorry, middle-sea passenger that I brushed your into this blood.
I just sat in my finger because I was having dinner with my friends and my friends.
And I was like, I'll tell you to look at me like that. What are you skinny girl?
Yeah, you mean?
I mean, I find it crazy that your palm is not congratulating me, and my recent marriage to Tom.
Dad, Jesus, we've heard and left about it in there, so you can't.
I love you, Lou, why can't we just be friends?
You're bankrupt!
Listen, one thing we don't talk about is the children, and my children is my money.
Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just going to end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter
or in court.
I'm Matt Bellasife.
And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder e's new podcast, Dis and Tell.
Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build up, why it happened,
and the repercussions.
What does our obsession with these feuds say about us?
We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle
between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber,
a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her
laminated eyebrows.
It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud.
But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon.
Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood.
How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully
crafted narrative designed to sell albums?
Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts.
You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wonder Yeah.
I actually imagine the middle passenger is now sitting there with D'Ariinda, passed out an ad free on the Amazon Music or Wonder Yeah. Here I am walking in here. I could let there's the man I know I spent the rest of my next seven months with
Durinda you walked on to this plane in your herman monster boots and you took the window seat and now you're not even sleeping I don't understand this and I don't appreciate it. Lisa sketches
You know I did just get married it would have been considered to give me the window seat.
Clip.
The end.
The end.
That was our crap in the middle seat.
That's fun.
I liked that little segment.
That was fun.
What was weird is that I can actually imagine
being in the middle of that and feel like, oh my god.
I actually feel like that wasn't us baking being a parody.
I think that was actually a very true to life.
That's probably happened to go put us on Southwest and what is it?
So that picture would basically be that lady selfie would be Dorenda sleeping
and drooling on her shoulder with blood.
Well, I was like a blood splatts all over where Dorenda was touching her.
with blood blood splats all over where Dora Linda was touching her.
And then Luanne, like shoving a photo up the wedding album in front of her. What? Well, she's trying to watch House Hunters on the little TV.
In front of her.
This poor lady, this poor lady is stuck between them.
But I also do really appreciate that Luanne and Dora Linda fly coach.
They just keep getting screwed, but it's just the way that
Luan describes it isn't coach at all ever.
It's like, well, we were in the class section of the, like,
which class section, you know, the class section of the plane,
what do you want me to call it?
Just to seat, let me come on.
I'm sorry.
You're the one saying it's a yard.
I never said that. I said it was class.
Excuse me, ma'am. When do we get our fresh cookies here in coach class?
No, no cookies. Well, I mean, I did just get married. It'd be considered.
Would you believe it girls? No cookies here. Oh, so that is the
orbits middle seat selfie. So take one of yourself on a middle seat anywhere and hashtag orbits.
No middle seat selfie sweepstakes. Yeah, super cool. And thanks, Orbits. They're going to be
our travel sponsor for our upcoming live shows. Yeah. And we are psyched to actually know people at Orbits.
Yeah, it's really cool.
Well, when we have an avid listener over there
and we are gonna convert the Orbits universe,
but for real, yeah, they are giving us a little sponsorship.
So we're paying it back.
And of course, they are giving away a flight voucher
at our live show. So thanks, Orbit. You're so
groovy. Yes. And we're, you know, very appreciative. Unlike Timzley.
No, this one. But it was hard. I really like that.
Still, by the way, that was the only reason why I was being like, you're going to fast,
because it's like, this is where I was planning to do the orbit's break So I was like no, oh, I thought man, this is where I was never I thought this is the first time in six years that you've ever said
You're moving through notes too fast
No, it's only because I was like because you know God forbid I actually tell Ronnie the plan ahead of time
So it's like no
It's the perfect timing in between
two sag. I wasn't expecting you to go that fast. I thought I'd be like able to jump
in and control the flow. Well, there was so much Bethany and Ramona yelling. I was trying
to type it so fast that I was like, I can't. And also, we're not going to go line by line
anyway, because we've been hearing it for years. It's always Bethany's same rant.
How dare you?
Walking across that bridge.
How could you make people feel like that?
Do you know how hard I worked?
I own everything.
I did this myself.
Nobody gave me nothing.
Sink to the top.
What did you do to Alex McCord?
What did you do to her?
What did you do to me?
Ah!
Bethany is an interesting character just to harp on this comment one more time.
Just because I started to watch a little bit of scary island episode and, um, you know,
and the episode begins with like, Kelly just like going in on Bethany being a chef versus a cook or a
cook, you know, cook versus a chef.
And the thing is with Bethany for as much as she puts on this hard exterior and we as much as we
always say she is hard, nothing gets too, she doesn't feel anything.
She's like extremely sensitive,
which obviously we know, she cries all the time.
But these things that you would actually think
she would brush off,
she actually takes into heart more than the normal person.
I think she's actually hypersensitive
because like when Ramona's yelling at her drunkenly
or a Kelly Benson-Mona's being a crazy person,
she doesn't seem capable to be like,
oh, you're just a crazy person
she's like you just destroyed my entire career right there in thirty minutes you just you just tore me down and it's kind of like
Don't you have enough? I thought you were like
Self-aware enough to understand that this is the drunk
Ravens of a crazy person right now and she doesn't seem to be able to do that well
She's sensitive enough to understand that she's sensitive. And I think that that could be a first step.
But if that's your only step, your sociopath, OK?
Like, you have to have feelings for other people too.
And I get that she's been wronged.
And she's really not incorrect about the list
that she goes off on with Ramona.
But a lot of that stuff, it's like so easy.
And she even says it when she gets mad.
She's like, I hate when people say it's all jealousy.
They're all jealous, but they're all jealous.
Like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
You know, maybe it does come from that, but it also comes from you
acting like you're always more important and you're feeling
so the only one that counts. And why is it okay for you to try and
break up someone's marriage or wait until you're on camera to
confront someone with a picture of their husband cheating blatantly?
And I'm like, why is that okay?
But then your mad that someone else waited six months to bring it up in a special time
Is it because you cried because of how hard it was gonna be for you to do this on camera?
This like fuck you, you know, it's like good that you can feel for yourself
Now just maybe extend the favor to the rest of
the humanity bit. I also feel like there's like a general awareness that if you're on these shows,
you're supposed to save stuff for being on camera. And I know that it's a weird thing, right? Because
it's a weird thing. But it is a weird thing because normal human beings would just, you know,
respect privacy and approach something off camera, you know. But at the same time, you guys are all in it together and it's all in your vested interest
to make it for a good show.
So it's a weird tension between being a good person and doing what a normal human being
would do and being a good cast member and trying to do something that they could all kind
of stay afloat and stay alive.
Well, in this situation in particular is the most obnoxious, I think of the whole season.
Because when this cast came back, they hadn't seen each other.
I remember the first couple of episodes of the season.
We were laughing because they were just so obviously like, all right, we're back.
Let's fight.
Drone really yellow.
Oh, you wait.
You wait.
I've been saving it.
Yes.
And then Ramona came in like,
well, I was friends with Bethany last year.
And she said some not nice things about me.
And I didn't know.
So I'm gonna start a fight with Bethany, okay?
And then she just wouldn't let it go.
Because Bethany did take it really well when she's like,
what about being on born below knee hub or whatever? And Bethany, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm like a real
whore. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I get baloney point, huh? Yeah, I like, I just like, I just
had the baloney at my badge, huh? I belong to a good, she took it well. And then
Ramonit was like, well, that's good that you don't get mad because I'm thinking about
you daughter. Like, this good really oh yeah
Yeah, don't die as always coming up to brin like what do you think about your mom's tips 20 years ago on there something
Like she was just taking it, you know
She was going with it, but Ramona just wouldn't let it go and it was obviously just some fake stupid thing and Bethany
New it so like yes Ramona was being obnoxious, right?
I mean Ramona also has a little bit of a point where she said, you know, don't you
like to say you said, we didn't have to go line by line because we've talked about it
so much, but now we're going back into it.
But Ramona did have a point where she said, well, all you had to say was that I hadn't
talked to her about it and everything's fine.
That's all you had to say.
And she's like, well, I'm not going to take, you know, what to say lessons from you.
Ramana.
And he's like, hmm, when he does that nods,
my life lost again.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, they actually were both right.
I mean, like Ramona is not the person
to be taking advice from,
but Ramona also is sort of saying,
listen, you actually could have just nipped this
in the butt, like I'm a crazy person.
You could have quieted me down just by saying this.
And the way I'm like, well, I'm glad that she's one getting
the sympathy.
I'm the one having to do this interview for my backyard.
It's just been so hard watching Ramona fight with my hairstyle.
The toll is taking on me.
I've been there, sister. Oh, God bless, Lewand.
So, back to Tinsley, I'm sorry, Tinsley.
It's hard to get into this, but my favorite Tinsley being a brat.
Not that easy to get over.
My favorite.
Basically just pulling a little land in, but I still like Tinsley.
This whole manner, staying with her mother mother is one of my favorite scenes ever
She's like well, I hope you're being appreciative and giving her cookies and leaving behind little treats
She's like like a dog. No, no
Also, you really means is to just be acknowledged and just say something and happy to it doesn't even matter what it
You're a good girl
That's all you need to pattern on the head like a dog. No
Just wait for her to go poopoo pick it up in the bag and don't guilt her about it like a dog I mean you could do it. I just like I mean just go outside and throw like a stick around something
Just something to show as you're interested in her
She just got to be impressed with you fetching something
shows you're interested in her.
She just must be impressed with you fetching something.
Okay.
You know what? Actually,
treating her like a dog would be a step up.
So just go there.
Okay.
Give her a bowl of water and put some radio on when you leave the house.
You know, it makes sense because my latest show in Santa
a pay is called Keeples and Bipples and Bits and Bits in vagina.
Oh my god.
A Bits sex now?
Oh geez.
So this turns into, uh, so basically it's like a pencil in Sonya.
They're right.
And it says, turns you sing, well, it started off all seriously and then it got really mean and it wasn't really nice. And so I was like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like,. You know, I was kidding about how you were hurting my feelings because I'd let you in and
then you're at dinner with my besties
and I'm just sitting at home trying to
learn which part bits go some
front of. Really a very difficult
thing, you know, it's the theater.
I could have used some support.
Yeah, Tinsley was basically Sonia said
that everything was fine until Tinsley
started airing all her dirty laundry to all of Sonia's friends.
And Lueh was like, well, I mean, as someone who did once live in the Bang Bang room in Sonia's townhouse, I have to say,
she was just being an overbearing mama. That's all. Just a sad, overbearing mama with brown eyes.
Oh, and by the way, they never talked about the brown eyes on the reunion. I think it was like the number one question I had. What was up with with brown eyes and by the way they never talked about the brown eyes on the reunion
That I think was like the number one question I had what was up with the brown eyes
The brown eyes. Yeah
He never he never got to that or he never he also never shamed Durrinda for being kind of
Home of phobia when she was talking about anal
I was surprised about that because I and the only I don't care that he didn't cuz I didn't find it homophobic at all
But I remember bringing it up when we were actually watching that episode cuz ever whenever somebody says something like that
He's like do you feel like you really hurt the gay community by saying that yeah, anal sex was disgusting and perverted
You know, he usually makes them go on the apology to her. Yeah, he likes to, he suddenly likes to become like a civil rights activist.
He's like, this is about me.
It's about the tears the Anderson Cooper shed when he saw this.
So yeah, Sonia, Sonia was like, well, I was just, I was heart-emptonsley because the bottom had just been pulled out of her life.
Oh, strange turn of words. And like, you know, she said, I want to come back
behind the comfort of your home and the safety of your arms and rebuild. What is this like I
A topster like a dog. See I'm a clock and told me to
Some comfort here sure that's right some comfort here not out
Playing the town and dating people who you didn't say you wanted to come here and date You said you wanted to make amends and apologize and show everybody you're not just some insecure idiot from the red carpets that you're really
a new person and I helped you. I was supposed to be the mentor.
I literally bought you a comforter.
So I actually think buried it like underneath the self-serving neuroses. Sonia actually has a little bit of a point.
I understand.
She was basically saying, look, you came here and said,
you want to get your life back together.
You don't want to go back to your old ways.
And you want to get married.
You're not looking to screw around.
So I was being like, no, you shouldn't do that,
because you're trying to get married, et cetera.
That's what I think Sonia was trying to say. Although although Tinsley then said, well, I never said that.
I never said I want to have that.
I mean, assuming if Sonya heard that that's what Tinsley wanted, then Sonya's response
makes some sense.
But I mean, all the brow beating and the mockery and the passerbesser comments, that doesn't fly.
Yeah, but I think Sony is really saying,
look, I helped get you on this show
so I could have a storyline of mentoring a new slut.
And you totally took that away with me
when you would only film Brownice.
And you didn't get me to give you any lessons.
Like, do you know how huge it would have been
if I could have had your vagina retitent?
You know, like you're just leaving me out. It's like you accepted a storyline outline and then decided
you didn't want to be in it. And I also like that while this is happening, they're living out
their strange mother-daughter dynamics because every while Sony has monologue and turns he's going, and then Lou An's being like the the fair but loving at because she was just
sticking up for tinsley no she was just sticking up for Sonia and saying well
she was just being overbearing but she means well and then she's like well I
don't know I don't know why you were said like I
don't have to leave little gifts for you you're my friend not my dog and then
the one who goes well you went to dinner on her birthday with her friends where
was the card we're all wrong okay we're all right we're all wrong. There are many size the situation and there are many fine birthday
cards on all sides. For example, congratulations on finding a husband getting a yacht in
a penthouse. Oh geez, here we go. I did like that when Tilly said my whole plan was a big
gift at the end, not a bunch of small gifts. And then Bethany goes, I believe that.
Oh my God.
What?
I had that.
I really was like, that's not really up there.
We're like, you have to.
Like, what is this?
Are you like the, like, the on Judge Judy?
Like, yeah.
I don't know.
It's official.
9-11 was fake.
It's like, OK, thanks Bethany.
OK, 9-11 was fake. Chen Zee's birthday, thanks Bethany. Okay, 9-11 was fake.
Tinsley's birthday plan, real, okay?
JFK was killed by Ronald McDonald, okay?
Like it's all real, I believe it, I believe it all.
And uh...
I'm your friend, not your intern.
Sorry.
And then Tinsley does the typical response.
Tinsley could really just get out of this by being like,
I know I came off ungrateful, that was not my intention.
I'm sorry, I got so, you know, weird and sensitive about it, but I was going through a hard time.
But instead she's like, I'm sorry, I'm not perfect, but it was tough. I was going through
a really hard time in my life. It's like you don't understand what I was going through.
Yeah.
I'm sorry, my iconic curl distracts me so much from doing the right thing
I'm sorry like you know like it was hard. I was so far from my blowout guy
He was an extra block away and it was hard enough a friend who has a little car that drives on the sidewalk
It's hard
And then Sonya says yeah, but every time she goes out and date somebody I knew that would happen
She just finds any old guy off the street and she's like, I'll make it work.
I'm like, you came home with someone from the coat check.
And you're driving to Hoboken to eat bread off some old dude you won't fuck.
Like, what are you talking about?
You married some old dude.
You seduced people in napkins.
Yeah.
Like, you married some old dude for his money.
Let me come on, Sonia.
So then there's like the sole page six controversy.
This is really silly controversy.
And it's like, Sonia, did you go to page six?
She's like, no, of course not.
And you care, like, I believe that she did.
And then I love that wall.
It's like Carol saying she did.
So I think she didn't.
No one's asking Ramona.
Ramona is sitting there with her eyes bulging.
Like she's about to take a giant dump on a chair.
Like, obviously, was Ramona. Clearly Ramona Turn to the back to find the answer on page seven.
You have to read it. It's upside down. Okay. No, those are just doku numbers. Why you look at
doku? Look at the Ramona quiz answer. Okay. But Sonia's answer is perfect.
And probably the most truthful, most truthful thing we've heard of them. I, because she goes, page six, being in the papers is what brought you back to
New York. Why, like, being in page six again is what got you here. So, yeah, since when
you have a problem being in page six. So, Tinsley, who basically said, I don't care if you were
the one who directly told the reporter or not, like you ran your mouth about it so much that it got the reporter somehow,
and that was really obnoxious.
And so he was like, well, I mean, how do you think I felt?
You know, you were saying you went to your friends first before talking to me,
and Carol's like, that's because you put her name in age six.
Why would she go to you?
So now we go to Mexico. Oh, wait, before
that, I just want to say there was discussion about the thank you fuck you party. And it's
like, was it a thank you or a fuck you party? And but he's like, Hey, can we call it a thank
you party? Hey, pardon me, I'm toast. I fuck you, who's what you said? Fuck you. Like,
it's like, thank you, been back together. It's like, fuck you, as always, you said. Fuck you.
It's like, thank you.
I'll fuck you together.
It's like, fuck you.
Get it?
You know, it's like, God, thank you.
Is fucking somebody now?
Oh my God.
I can't even say thank you anymore.
I guess I'm just as much of a whore as Bethany.
And then, Timzys, I'm sorry.
I thought I was in the perfect house, guys.
I'm sorry I didn't bring you coffee and flowers.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. Oh, I want to drink the other half of it. I'm sorry, I'm the perfect house guess I'm sorry to bring you coffee and flowers. I'm sorry I'm sorry. Oh, I
The perfect daughter, okay, but give me a little credit
Credit for trying to must we can wait a minute. I know that speech
You do you
You are enough Celeste
What are we gonna do of viewing of soap dish or big business?
We just have to have that happen.
We need to have like a crap and it's viewing of it.
Just like go to a bar, put it on the big screen.
We can't recap.
We just have to watch it and just take it all in and it's glory.
What are we going to do that?
I don't know.
Make a plan.
Make a date.
Make an eye count.
Oh, cool.
Party. Party. that's you.
Well, serve Horlone sandwiches.
Horlone.
It's slunching them on the way up the door.
Like, thank you for coming.
Everyone has to bring baloney for Houston.
No Ramona, that's not going to help.
Fine, then I'll eat the baloney.
Oh, yeah, by the way, everyone should, by the way, go ahead.
This is a good moment to like, in the middle,
I love this, right in the middle of the recap.
For real though, everyone, go donate the Red Cross,
because we have a lot of crap ins listeners that are down there in Houston
and the surrounding areas that have been really affected by Hurricane Harvey,
that motherfucker of a hurricane, it's fucking up people.
We actually have a few people, including including Christina who came to our Austin show
She's one of our most ardent listeners, but also several others who had bought tickets to fly to LA from Houston for our
Our show this weekend and they may not be able to come because of hurricane Harvey
So that I mean that's the least of the concerns in Houston right now
But you know just a show that we have crap and family down how Harvey affected us.
Later skater.
We're like lounging in privilege on Sky that works.
You guys.
Gross, but not flooded.
Yeah, you guys like poor people aren't coming, but no, for real though, but I was just
trying to say as a way to personalize that we have crap ins listeners
there. And you can go to, I think it's red cross org. You know how to use Google, you can
get the red cross, but also Christina actually posted a phone number for the local chapter
of her red cross. So if you go to our Facebook page, Facebook.com slash watcher crap ins,
that's up there right there. Just scroll. You'll find it. Go donate $10, $100, $1,000,
$1,000 dollars whatever you want
Yeah, but I'll do that. Yeah, help everyone out. Don't send baloney though. That's not gonna help
Ramona
What if I send Ramona Pino Griesia? I'm single. I'm ready to mingle. Okay
Have a balloon you needingle. Okay. It's been just happening. You need everybody. Okay.
Hey, hey, how about I send a skinny girl fume attempt.
Hmm. No, Bethany.
That's just you got too far.
She won't do. She would skinny girl like that.
You're sitting under a margarita line.
Okay. This holds in it because of the seeds.
Plain them. Okay. I'm sending everyone skinny girl to Kila to get to the Houston. Okay, there's holes in it because of the seeds playing them
Okay, I'm sending everyone skinny girl to Kila to get to Houston. Okay, get to it. Okay. All right everybody Here's some skinny girl popcorn. They're like the size of a palm
I do actually wonder in a very dark way. I do wonder how Cindy Cindy arose from marriage medicine Houston
How she is handling it like I kind of amused by the idea of her perhaps being on like a little canoe,
just paddling through.
I mean, like, would you believe this?
You know what these people need right now?
My silhouette art.
Yes, she's doing slavery silhouettes on a raft somewhere.
Just say it.
Completely oblivious to the point. Everyone's like, errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Anyway, Rose. My Rose is my husband. And everybody starts cracking up. And he's like, well, you know, you got a hand at
the blue hand. You know, see, did it. So I did. Didn't I?
Also, by the way, when they were watching the video of the mall in Mexico, which was a really
funny video by that was a really funny clip package. In the middle that, you know, remember,
Ramona had that issue with her face. in the middle of it Leuand just goes
at the reunion Leuand just turns the Ramona goes oh my god your face Ramona
I mean would you look at that craziness looks like a pizza and then to Rinda having her fit
at the table to stab it I stabbed myself look. Look at that funny. You know, it's
crazy about that when I did that. I didn't even feel it. That's
a crazy part. That's not the crazy part that you didn't feel
anything. Okay, no one is shocked that you didn't feel anything
to read. I know. No one is shocked that you decided to recreate a scene from alien. This trip.
Was it an alien or aliens where they were stabbing doing that thing with a knife with the fingers?
Um, I see it on delivery arm. Everything where there's an army show ever. Like an army hang out.
The guys are just hanging out playing poker. Predator makes sense because Ramona's face was looking like the Predator's vision,
just like red splashes.
It's like three at night vision camera.
Well, I'm Predator Predator's POV.
I'll be back, okay?
That's a term, baby.
She's just confused with everything.
Wrong Arnold movie.
I'll be back and I'm having a baby cute and I can't have one. But science is mid. No, now you're just mixing Terminator with everything. Wrong Arnold movie. I'll be back and I'm having a baby cute and I
can't have one but science is mid no now you're just mixing Terminator of the
Junior. Danny DeVito is my twin okay I didn't ask for this. You know my favorite
movie is Red Sonia that's about you Sonia.
I know. It's my favorite show that I do in Santa
but Nigerian football teams.
They love red Sonya.
It's when I open up my legs and show,
no, what's enough.
We don't need to hear.
We don't need to hear what the rest of it is.
It's all I was trying to teach tinsley
and then I got vilified for it.
So,
vilified Blanca.
They showed a clip of Louangus being wasted
and falling down over and over.
I never wanna plot it.
And he's like, wow, I mean, we've seen some drunk trips,
but give it to Louang for being the drunkest ever.
And she's like, did you see me in that bush?
I didn't wanna get out of it.
I was so happy.
I was the happiest bush I'd ever been in.
Bethany's like, yeah, in, the next day you were like,
I took a tumble and they got in.
That wasn't a tumble, that was manned down.
Ha!
Manned it was like, you fell in a big garner pussy, you know?
Ha!
Well thank you, Sheki.
Like it literally if it had been me if I'd fallen
into the bushes, like I wouldn't have died
been it, just like I'll say kill me the bushes.
Like I'll say just like, stuff and push it out my throat.
Okay, you know what's like,
it's like, it's like, pussy down your throat. Like, it's like too much. I can't have so much pussy. Like I'll say kill me the the bushes like I'll say just like stuff push down my throat okay so you know it's like stuff and pussy down your throat like it's like too
much I can't have so much pussy like I'll say kill me now like just let me bleed
out of the bushes okay like the bushes are red because I'm bleeding out and
then I'm dead like I'll say kill me now. Why can't this why can't this
but just let me be happy. Seriously.
It's like these bushes don't want me to be happy.
Like I'll say like Bobbie McFarron like don't worry how about you be happy okay
like I'll say like don't tell me to be happy. How about like don't worry be be quiet
how about that that's a matter of your happy you came up with like three words for an entire song like yeah I won't how about you be happy? Okay, like I'll see like don't tell me to be happy How about like don't worry be be quiet. How about that? That's yeah
I'm sure you came up with like three words for an entire song like yeah
I won't even get you didn't get instruments. Okay, like I work. Okay. Like I put this like a real bad Okay, like do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do most famous song ever, okay? No, I know the song, don't buy no, okay?
Guess what?
Like, shut up.
Like, don't worry, shut up.
How about that?
That's a great song, Bob McFarron.
How about this?
I'll take your Grammys and you go and don't worry, and
be in shut up, okay?
I don't know if you get to Bob McFarron.
I don't think you know.
Things happen so quickly.
You know what it is?
This is our penultimate New York episode of the year.
We got to cram everything in.
This I'm looking through these notes and I'm like, how did we get here?
Well, they're a bit because at this point the show kind of was like then became like a let's laugh at our greatest hits.
So then they're talking about this. It's the Super Bowl of Drinking. We were preparing. We prepared our,
we were preparing 10 years, we were preparing like all our life.
And then Tinsy is like, yeah, I was drinking
down in Pompi just getting ready for two.
Oh, yeah, Tinsy.
And then Bethany, well, I think it was after this.
So first, Andy's like, Dorenda,
that was pretty harsh when Bethany yelled at you.
Are you got, oh, there's still hard feelings?
And she's like, no, you didn't know how I'm feeling.
We made it packed before
this trip we were like we could do whatever we want you will everyone we did it yeah it's
fine you know it's okay I cried call myself a boom it's great and then Andy's like yeah but
Bethany somebody said that you're a nag and don't you think you're a control freak? And she's like, you think, I don't know, I'm a control freak.
What the hell?
Literally, what is this news to me?
I'm like, it's like D-PAC 101, okay?
Yeah, that's like saying H2O is water, okay?
Like, come on, obvious.
Okay, the first secret about H2O is that.
I'm not a fucking secret, okay?
Like, we've all read it, like I get it.
Like, so Bethany feels like,
because this is getting into the Duran da thing a little bit
and Bethany feels like the other woman
judge her for her success, which I can understand.
I actually do feel like when you get really successful,
it's probably hard not to be concerned about that.
And to be fair, I did appreciate Bethany saying,
like I know I was pretty much annoying everyone
with skinny girl stuff and I know like people were kind of annoyed that the Genesis at this trip was basically
You know an outgrowth of this skinny girl thing, but basically I just I really want to be perfect
I was really excited to go the skinny girl thing. Yeah, I was like, okay. I'm glad you recognize that
Well, she's like, yeah, the skinny girl bottles everyone
People make fun of me because it's like, ah, skinny girl bottle behind her head like I get it
But this is this one day was actually about it.
It wasn't just props that I forced people
to like glue to their walls when I was visiting house.
Okay, it was like the one day actually about it.
It was the three episode, you know,
arc that was actually dedicated.
It's like Bethany.
No, it's not the only episode that was at every episode
you've been in has actually been dedicated.
Okay. You know, I would actually like a retraction No, it's not the only episode that was at every episode you've been in has actually been dedicated, okay?
You know, I would actually like a return to Bethany cooking shit
You know, I know she's about to have her spin off where she where she flips stuff with Frederick and you know
I believe she's actually very capable in that area too
But you know, she's I feel like we haven't actually seen her cook in a while. I mean, that's what she was.
You know, I remember the days when she was making little granola cookies and trying to sell
them at the whole foods.
She was, you know, a healthy chef.
And I think it would actually be really charming if we saw her get back to those roots a little
bit next season.
Yeah.
Well, you know, she'll probably come out with recipes that you can make with margarita mix, you know
margarita lemabars
Oh, and that's like a real prediction by the way. Yeah, it'll be like how you can make certain kinds of cakes with kool-aid
Makes it's like okay kool-aid man. We get it. You're trying to stay relevant
So let's see here
Next up Bethany becomes the critic of her own show,
which she's like her own yell preview.
She's like, yeah, you know, I watch these clips.
Like, this is literally the best season
I've ever seen at this show.
You don't say, huh?
Yeah.
So then I think at this point, I think we then move on
to the Rosen Thorn segment to wrap it up right in my correct it might skipping anything
Yeah, Rosen Thorn, Rosen Thorn
So this is where we resurrect the Rosen Thorn game where the winds like my husband Tom rose of all life
And like okay, what's the Rosen Thorn of the season? The winds like well my rose was getting married to Tom
My rose was getting married to Tom, DagaCena. And my thorn was hearing all the talk about Tom,
because I love him.
I love him so much,
but I appreciate all the concern you bitches have for me,
but I love Tom, see rose above.
Thanks for having my back, girls.
Well, you stab at multiple times on the yacht we got.
In Palm Beach, Easter West, unspecified.
Then to rest during this like my rose is Hannah
Recognizing the pile of chains by the grief site
So I know the Richard was there and there's all what's in baby's belly because we are moving forward
know the Richard was there and let's all look to famous family because we are moving forward to a place and I was like
it's great and it wasn't great you know what I mean
and my son was fighting with Bethany because you come here
I leave you as a home and I stab myself. Have I gone here? As I did it, I had a lot.
Wait, wait, relax, relax, relax.
Did it time, did it time.
Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh.
Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh.
Uh, Tinsie's like, well, this is,
Scott got me, Rose is.
Tinsie's like, well, and then Sonia,
I don't remember Tins. What were she said?
Her rose moved back to New York and meeting sky and her thorn was fighting with
Sonia. And Sonia was her rose was putting the Dorenda thing to bed. And my thorn was too
much tough love on tensly. I should've just relax and given her two tickets to cap her
last playing at the YMCA on the East
River. This really is a cute way to end it. It's like here's what I learned this season.
I like it because sometimes it's just like any last thoughts. I'm like, well, you hurt
my feelings, but I got off to get over it. But this one, they're like, well, here's the
good. And what I should have learned. And Carol's like, the one was the good. And what I should have learned. Oh, and Carol's like, the thorn was the election.
And the rose was going to Washington.
I used to work with AIDS.
It's like, oh.
I don't know what I'm saying.
Adorama bonus says, my thorn was my behavior towards Bethany.
But my rose was Mexico.
That was such a fun trip. Why was it a fun trip?
I don't know. I don't know.
My rose was Bethany getting naked. Right after she told me she would only be naked in public 20
years ago and she would never do that now, kind of proving my point
that she's gonna embarrass her to whatta by being naked and a whore monster.
Thank you.
My other rose was not getting invited to the winds wetting even though I'm her best friend
and already booked a room in West Palm Beach.
Okay.
And Beth and he's like, like, the Rose is like, I don't even know.
I didn't listen to that.
What's a Rose? Like who cares? Like seriously?
The Rose is the color of the skinning girl and they're lucky.
I don't see them. Okay.
You know what? I'll say like some say Rose.
Like, I don't say like, what are we bet?
I'm gonna be right now seeing about Rose's like, I can't like, how about this?
How about the Rose?
But what are we in a parade? Huh?
Well, you can pass the dinner.
You know, how about I pass the dinner on this question?
Okay. Get it?
Yeah. And yeah, the sea.
That's how you love Love is a river.
A river is sex now too?
Oh my god.
She's like, my thorn is no offense Ramona.
Like, I mean, I guess it probably affected me,
but like, like you affected me a little bit,
but like you can't even be in my thorn right now.
I'm like, it affected you a little bit.
Are you really gonna say that Ramona is not important enough to affect you after
you just screamed for three hours and be rated her for 20 weeks? Then it didn't affect
you. God bless this show. God bless it. Put it in the Library of Congress. All of mankind
is to know about this show for the rest of eternity. It's just so good. It's so good. And I appreciate it. Sorry. You go
I was just gonna say Bethany sure to have the last line as always because it's like Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha in between one. I think that'd be remote. It would be chilly, Willie.
This egg loop is a little cold in here, okay?
Put you wiggly away, okay?
My father already is calling me a whore, okay?
And I think clearly Durrindo would be the elevator dog.
Going down?
Going down.
I stabbed myself.
I made it nice.
Floor was stabbed me.
Oh, it was the emergency key.
I didn't even feel it.
I didn't even feel it.
I think every time the elevator passes the floor
I go, Clip.
Clip.
Clip.
Clip.
Going down.
Down.
Going down. Dan. Going.
Ding!
Well, we made it to the end of another episode where we somehow managed to go on a run about Arnold Schwarzenegger movies,
Bobby McFarion, and Woody Woodpecker.
So, I say job will done.
And a good, good job for the whole season.
Loved this show.
Absolutely hilarious.
I'm sad that it's gonna be gone.
I'm I'm sad too.
I'm glad we get one more shot on Saturday
to do the do our New York accents.
And tomorrow we're talking Auckland,
which is gonna be a very different show than today's
because on the Auckland episode,
someone drops the N word.
So. Good time. Very different, very different than today's because on the Auckland episode, someone drops the N word. So,
good times. Very different, very different candor to that episode. Yeah, good times, guys. Everyone, thanks so much for being here.
We will see some of you this weekend and everyone else we will see on Monday.
Yeah, or tomorrow too. Oh, I mean, yeah, you know what I mean.
Oh, I mean, you know what I mean.
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