Watch What Crappens - Shahs: Are You Being Sherv'd?
Episode Date: August 28, 2017It's the grand Shahs of Sunset / Newlyweds: The First Year crossover the world has been waiting for! Turns out sweet, kind Shervin is a bit more devilish than we ever imagined (read: obvi) b...ecause he's been banging Tara of Tara & Rob (aka Tarb). It's a scandal we all weren't prepared for but somehow must embrace. Come listen to our take on this madness! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Hey everyone, welcome to watch a crap ends podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just
love to watch.
I'm Ben Mandelker from BSIBlog.com and the Banderblander podcast and joining me
remotely from Las Vegas on his birthday weekend. It's Roni Karam from trashtalktv.com and
also the Rose Pricks Bachelor of Paradise podcast. What's up, Roni?
Well, hello, Ben. Are you surviving? Have you met a little girl I'm wearing? And I'm laying in a giant bed in Vegas looking at the
gorgeous Vegas skyline staying at the Westgate hotel.
Where there's pictures of Elvis everywhere
because he used to perform here all the time.
Really?
And I just thought, man, if there's ever a birthday
to just die on the shitter, it's this one.
And it's like, I keep
the Elvis is fucking everywhere. I wake up, Elvis is looking at me from one wall and Marilyn
Monroe is trying to get all sexy with me from another wall. It's been an odd birthday.
So if I don't come back, it's because I probably had a heart attack while I peeped. Okay? So
thank you. Well, it sounds like a very exciting birthday to me.
And I suddenly have lots of FOMO.
Somehow that story gave me FOMO.
Because it made me think of all the crazy
of Vegas with you.
Well, maybe you think of all the crazy things
that happen in Vegas.
And I haven't been to Vegas in, I don't know,
a few years now.
I think the last time I was in Vegas was on my birthday when I drove out there with Lisa Timmans and our friend
Woa. We drove out, we left at six in the morning, we drove out there, we arrived
at the Bellagio, we had lunch, we played like a few slots, turned around and
came back and we're having dinner in LA. That was my birthday. Wow. That's a good one.
I um, this one was really weird because I was here with the Queen of Versailles
shooting like a little package for her while she did the Mrs. America tangent.
Oh yeah. Not did it, but um, posted it.
And oh my god, what a craze. It was so fun. I'll tell you about it in the bonus episode later this week.
Yeah, I can't wait to hear about that.
That sounds amazing, super amazing.
Almost as amazing as our live show,
which is now less than a week away.
And the Los Angeles one, at least.
We've got two ones in Chicago coming up
at the end of the month or at the end of September.
But oh my God, we're in the home stretch now
for this LA showA. show.
It's crazy.
I can't believe it.
I know.
We're going to have so much fun that weekend.
I'm going to be, I'll have a whole week from now to rest at.
I know.
I'm like, oh God, can you hear this?
Someone's arrived for the live show.
They're a week early.
Does they know?
I can't get a motorcycle out there.
I'm so excited for this live show, but I am also so excited to not be doing stuff for the live show.
I'm so excited to be done.
It's like it's endless.
I can't even imagine what putting on a wedding is like.
Live show is this much work.
I know.
I hate doing things. Doing things is the worst.
I still have a basketball of clean laundry that has been at my living room for past a week.
Doing things.
Well, every time I should be sorting my laundry, I'm like, I got to do stuff for the live show.
Every time I'm like, I got to do stuff for the live show, I'm like, I got to work on that laundry.
And then I go, I send the couch, I do nothing.
Well, every time you try and start sorting your laundry, I think, you know, babe, I'm pregnant
and it would be nice.
If Ben would consider folding my laundry and picking through my laundry because, you know,
like, I don't need to be weighted on, but babe.
Babe.
I'm pregnant.
Yes. on but babe babe pregnant yes awesome awesome we are talking about Shaza Sunset
today and this week's episode opens up with awesome and just full self-aggrandizing
asshole mode which is great she shows up at her parents house and she's you know
it's you know, they put out this
whole spread of food.
It looks good.
It looks delicious.
I'm ready for like a heartwarming scene.
And instead, it's just Asa talking about Israel and how it was so physically demanding.
She thought she couldn't even do it, but she pushed through the survivor that she is
because she's also the first lady that has ever been pregnant in Israel.
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
So the mom, She's like mommy
a Mr. Food, which is like so nice. It's like geez, miss you, too, bitch. So she comes in
to get her free food. And her mom's like, or or also says, I'm so tired. And her mom
goes, that is the and then she puts in quotes pregnancy out of quotes talking.
I was like, oh my god, even her mother thinks it's bullshit.
Yeah.
Her mom is basically saying like, there's the science experiment
growing in your womb.
Yeah.
I'm tired.
So it also goes on this whole pity party thing.
And she's like, yeah, babe, I just, I felt like so alone physically, babe, mom,
like it was just like I was alone.
And like, no one was looking out for me. Like I'm pregnant and no one's looking out for me and
You I'm one of my favorite things in a reality show is when producers or editors are clearly
Like against one of their own stars because
They supplied such a montage that was so contradictory
To what anything awesome said just like, no one even helped me with bags.
And they showed Gigi of all people be like,
I got these bags, you know, I'll take all these bags.
It's fine.
Yeah, it's especially because they're rolling.
Yeah, like this cast, they're nice when it's convenient.
And then Destiny helped her down a step.
She's like, there's no one even to help me down steps.
And it's like someone helping her down a step.
No one even asked about me and said, like, let me know if you need something.
Even the, even the, even like the ocean didn't even give me a helping hand. They showed the
Dead Sea literally lifting her up, floating her. Oh, fucking awesome. So she there was something I wanted to say about her. Oh, yeah, she's like, I was alone physically.
Yeah, I was wondering what that, what'd she mean by that?
I was alone, you know, physically. I'm like, you separated yourself from the group to hang out
with like three hippies who call themselves spiritual leaders. I know those hobos.
Like the dance around the streets with hobos who are like prying for tips.
Don't you remember like while you were alone, your friends are being scandalized by toy guns.
Who's the real man? Like terrorist Christmas.
Um, and also says, um, you know, you know what the real thing?
Pregnancy brain.
My regular brain, it's like an almond right now.
I was like, no, it's not because you would have eaten it.
So she did contribute to our drought.
I knew it.
So, Serven Mike, next, you say almond or omelet?
Almond. But I went with it. I'm sure in Mike, next, go on. Do you say almond or omelet? Almand.
But I went with it.
I don't think I can.
No, no, no, because almond trees, almond harvest
were one of the big users.
Oman farmers used up a lot of water.
That was the whole thing.
But I thought that she had said her brain was like an omelet.
So then I realized afterwards, I was like, wait,
didn't she say her brain was an omelet? Oh, I don't know. I just know she said it was a food product.
She said, my regular brain was like a mic and Ike. Oh, I noticed that her regular brain.
I noticed that her brain came with a side of hash rounds and a choice of bacon or sausage.
My regular brain is like a McMuffin. I just like to have options, babe.
Babe.
So serving like are in their big party SUV with their cousins in the back,
like trying to get their faces into the camera while they take shots from,
you know, red cups.
Yeah.
And then they go to this sad club in Hollywood.
Whenever they go to a club in Hollywood, I just, it makes me feel like,
I know, because it's just so dirty.
Like Hollywood, Hollywood, Boulevard, it's just so dirty and gross.
And, you know, everybody, it really does look like kind of the end of the world.
You know, those, we'll like every TV show now.
It's like this zombie apocalypse and stuff.
Yeah.
It's kind of like, yeah, you just walked down everyone's kind of twitching and scratching parts of themselves
And like they all smell and everyone's wasted and like no matter what part of town you're in you hear car alarms and like bottles breaking on the ground
I was like just waiting for
A bottle to break as soon as you said that on cue outside my window
Because every time you, at last night, I was like,
I went to my bathroom, I heard like all this like,
one dog just would not stop barking
and start howling, I was like, what the fuck,
I look at the window, they were like full,
there's two coyotes just standing in the intersection,
just making noise.
I was like, this is such a weird neighborhood.
Just in the intersection.
And then two drunk people come walking by
and I thought to myself, I should warn them
that there's a coyote up ahead and I was like eh they'll figure it
out yeah in other words just treat it like natural street sweeping I got I got
swept by a street sweeper last week I was walking down the sidewalk I got
street sweeper came right on up and street swept me it It was so rude. I was like, excuse me, I'm trying to get to my coffee.
And now I've got dust on my shins.
Got like a little free seaside.
It's just, it feels violating.
So anyway, so...
So Mike and Shervin have this club being violated.
Yeah, it's being of street service.
It's being of hairy spinning things. Shervin have this club being violated. Yeah, it's being of street service. And Mike speaking of Harry spinning things.
Shervin and Mike.
Shervin and Mike, that is fully empty probably because they shot this at 3 p.m.
and they hired people off of Craigslist to fill out the scene.
So they're there and the lights are the lights are fully on.
Listen, I am a student of the hills.
I know what it's like when camera's going to real clubs. Okay, you can't see shit, you can't hear shit, you have all these subtitles,
it's like grainy. This was like brightly lit. Everyone spoke perfectly clear. It was so
clearly set up at bother band.
Um, yeah, I think it's like that old star shoes location because they're always going
to that same location. I miss it. going to that same location and it just changes
the, it just changes the sign every time. Yeah. But yeah, I was sad and it was like all red in there
and it was mostly just them and they're like, order some bottles which I always think is so funny.
You know why? I'm getting, I'm so lazy right now, by the way. I understand I'm giving like 20% energy, but it's just what you're in.
I was rolling over in bed and putting like all these little cheap pillars together to
make a big pillow.
And then I was like, I can't read this on my computer laying like this.
So I opened it on my iPad instead.
And now I'm just like sitting here breathing in my underwear and the iPad
is going up and down. No, I can hear that you've had a long weekend in Vegas and that you're
in a very comfortable hotel bed. And I'm like jealous. I'm officially jealous. Oh my God,
you shouldn't be jealous. I think I really think I'm going to die of shitting. I really
think that's good. No, I'm just jealous that you're in a hotel bed because there's always so comfy.
Well, you know, we got good comfortable beds, me and you.
Yeah, well, I mean, well, you know,
that's right, we got our cast.
Girl, I miss my bed.
It's not so much about the mattress,
because you know, I love my Casper.
It's more about like the bedding.
You know, I always try to make my bedding really.
I've been trying to make my bedding nice,
but it's nasty.
And I have like a white pillowcases, and guess what, there's aren't to my bedding really. I've been trying to make my bedding nice, but it's nasty and I have like a white pillow cases
and guess what, there's aren't to like turn
gross colors because that's what happens.
Oh yeah, that's what happens.
Cause you feel shame.
It's like, I can't help it.
I can't help that my body, I have oils like every other human,
but for some reason I don't know.
And the darling we need maids.
I like when they, when the,
everything's like cleaned every week.
Like fresh sheets every few days
I did that I did that there was there was a I had like a stretch like in 2013 where like I
Have this thing were on Mondays. I did this I cleaned this part of the apartment Tuesday
And I cleaned I had a section that I cleaned every single day and my apartment was clean and it was wonderful
And like ever since then I've never been able to clean anything. I'm like I can't
I'm gonna change my shoes. I like. I like living. I like seeing the depression,
like, represent itself physically in my life. Like, I like walking in my house like,
and I step on a paper plate on my way in the door. Or it's like saying a lot.
Okay, sorry.
Anyway, so speaking of my
depression,
speaking of a physical representation of depression.
So my concern are still in there and Mike's like,
in Israel, I had a jupiff in me.
You know, and so now I want to go out and find somebody,
I need to find somebody to marry.
I'm like, you just ordered bottles.
You're at a fucking disgusting club in Hollywood,
and you're drinking Bedori from a bottle. Yeah. And you're only allowed to have so many
epiphanies. Whether there are epiphanies or jupefhanies, you have one every single week. Like, you
open up like a cracker jacks box. I just had an epiphany. I need to be opening more things in my life,
like this box. It's like, no, Mike, you don't get to have an epiphany with that cracker jacks box.
Okay. So, I'm not putting more things in my life, like this box. It's like, no Mike, you don't get to have an epiphany with that cracker jack's box, okay?
So, as a epiphany.
Sorry, I'm not a box.
So, Resa.
Like, you know what I mean?
Some chocolate coins that are covered in gold.
Oh, I couldn't buy.
It was a two-piphany.
I'm really craving some chocolate right now,
so don't play.
So, Resa shows up and they're all there,
and then they're like, they're looking at some girl
by the bar and Resa's like,
this bitch is like, I'm gonna wear my flats,
my comfy shoes and my clothes.
How are you gonna wear flats in a club?
I'm like, because she doesn't want people like you
talking to her, that's why,
because she knows people like you are gonna see her,
see those flats, be disg it and not even approach her.
She's got the right idea.
Especially look, you're trying, you're like a Persian atom, a Vene.
Okay, like I don't know who you think you're kidding.
Anti-Mike like with your hair teased and your fucking eyebrow pencils and and resa looks
like he's wearing something from a Costco.
And I know because I go there with my mom sometimes and I'm like, Oh, there's that shirt
from the Costco. And he's like, oh, they're growing sluts. Okay, Kirkland.
Kirkland with a that target brand was called mandavi or whatever or manda manda manda manda
manda manda manda manda manda manda manda manda manda manda manda manda manda manda manda Manda Manda Manda Manda Manda Manda Manda Manda Manda Manda Manda Manda
So Reza is like a oh not Reza Mike is like hey, hey, or was it sure?
What if I'm school? Hey to this girl passing by this like 15 year old girl who just got off the school bus
Like for some reason isn't this bar. Yeah, well at one point Shervin's like
like for some reason isn't this bar. Yeah, well, at one point, Shervin's like,
uh, nice little rusty.
So I'm going to show him how it's done.
So excuse me.
And he like walks up and he's like,
Hey, what are you doing up here at the bar?
I'm ordering a drink, huh?
Hey, look at you.
You're a very good drink.
Like, you know, look, maybe I'll have a drink with you.
Yeah, but I'm sure you did.
I'm just like, you get read a book.
What a shock.
Someone talks to you when you show them a table full of bottles and buy them free drinks.
You guys are really good with it.
So Mike is now drunk and he's just disgusting.
The way he's hitting on these women, he's like stroking their faces and he's like,
you're actually very cute.
And then he turns to another one and strokes her face.
He goes, uh, don't get jealous.
You're very pretty too.
Trust me.
I'm like, ew. Yeah, he goes, don't get jealous, you're very pretty too, trust me. I'm like, ew.
Yeah, he's really just, talking like a villain
in some weird movie, you know, like with,
you know, those bond villains,
there are harms of women that that's what he's doing.
Yeah, he's like, you know, like I like when you talk,
but maybe you should just like put my dual in your mouth,
make it, make it more useful.
So he's disgusting.
Yeah.
And then Destiny's talking to him and she's like, whoa, oh, my, I love him.
But like, is he really like, he just the way he talks to girls?
Like, I know that you think like maybe we would be fucking, but like this not going
to happen because we're just like friends
And I think destiny really wants to get both far mic what do you think?
I'm starting to get the sense that Destiny is smarter than all the people on this show and she has a good idea of what's going on And she's like I'm not touching any of them with a 10-foot-fall or a duel. Yeah
not touching any of them with a 10 foot pole or a duel. Yeah.
But Mike is like, Mike is, Mike is being so kind of
standing to this woman.
He's like, he's like, hey, don't ever get any fucking brass.
You're perfect.
Just this, everything right here, this is perfect.
Don't change a thing.
And he said to another girl, he's like, he's like,
he's like, I will change your life.
I will change your life.
I'm like, not for the better.
Yeah, you're drinking medori from the bottle, sir.
Okay, these are chains your life.
Yeah, exactly.
And it's like, there's nothing, you know, I like how did you
piphany right now?
If I were a rich man, Ladi, Dadi, Dadi, Dadi, Dadi, Dadi, Dadi,
Dadi, Dadi, Dadi, Dadi, Dadi, Dadi, Dadi, Dadi,
all day long guy, duty, duty, duty.
If I was a wealthy man, but don't bomb. I'm just I'm having a
jeepiphany and I'm looking at my life and you know it goes sunrise sunset sunrise sunset
crazy day times fly. I'll then look at pretty pretty bum okay. Is this the little bottle of Madori I walked in here with?
Is this the booze that I drank?
I can't, I wish I knew the next lyrics.
I just love the Mike's son, Ryzen set.
It's about a bottle of Madori.
Well, he clearly is one of those dancers at that
part in the musical. What are the bottle dancers, whatever, you know, and all the
hisetic guys are like doing that dance, but they're all balancing bottles on their head.
He's got a bottle of Midori on his. You know what, tradition. It's like... Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, D, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, D, Dump, D, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, Dump, D, Dump, Dump, D I love Fiddler on the roof. I'm gonna be singing that now all night long. I've actually never seen it.
I've never seen the movie all the way through,
and I've never seen the musical.
I've seen scenes of the musical,
because I saw when I was younger,
I saw Jerome Robbins Broadway,
so they showed me some of that.
Oh, yeah. I love that show.
Yeah, but I've never actually seen Fiddler on the roof,
and I actually feel like I should see it,
because I feel like I just like cry
No, it's a really good show and then when you cry, you're like crying because I don't know the guys name is zero
You know and it's like he's still happy. He's still worked so hard to be happy
So Mike is like I you know, I'm having a jupef any I don't I'm realizing that there's nothing here
I want I want a woman who likes to be at home the woman
I love needs to wake up for work the next day and have a job so I could fund my baby shoe company
And every time he says make cabbage soup and every time he lists something that he wants in a woman
They keep showing flashbacks of Jessica, which is so mean.
Like, you messed up, you messed up, you fucked up, fuck you.
He's like, a woman who likes to cook. She's like, I think this is right.
And then some girl just comes over and starts torquing on his face and he like pushes her away.
He's like, I don't want this anymore. Like, whatever, you loved it.
Yeah. Whatever, You loved it. Yeah.
Whatever you loved it.
You loved it.
That's what makes me appreciate that.
It was amazing to wear it.
I was writing your face.
You deserved it.
You deserved it because you're such a dick
and you should be made uncomfortable by a twerk.
So then we go to red,
so red,
then we cut to an antique shop
where Resa is walking in. I was like my first instinct was
This is not gonna be good. You know when Resa goes into an antique shop things are bad. They something terrible is about to happen
Like give you five dollars
Okay
Five dollars and 25 cents. Okay
Five dollars and 20 cents
So they're looking for it now. He's with MJ.
He would have him.
He would have him.
There are so many knobs.
Yeah, so many knobs.
He's like, she's such a disaster.
Like homegirl, like, doesn't even understand like cabinetry.
Like, making a change is so difficult.
So we're just going to start with knobs, you know?
Like it always starts with a knob.
You know, here's the thing. if she's going to have problems, why would you take her to
a store that has a million knobs, more knobs that has ever been seen, just present her
with three samples and say which one do you want best, that's how they do it on HGTV,
you know, the lady, the flipper flop lady, she comes in with back splash number one and
back splash number two, which is basically just back splash number one
And she says Torek
Which one do you think you want to do the white subway tiles?
You want to do the white subway tiles with a Moroccan imprint in the middle
Sorry
And he's like I hate you and our baby
Torek and I like that Israel gets all the credit for this. He's like,
yeah, if you're like a human being with even 50% awareness, then Israel's going to change
your life. For example, MJ is ready to bite cabinet.
I mean, I know you're up against the Western wall, but I don't know that like renovation was going to be the thing
that you got out of this.
And then Jay, and Jay's such a midi.
It's like, well, I really like that one,
but I don't like the circles.
And then she goes, you know, I want to handle these knobs
are played out.
Nubs are so played.
It's like, you know what?
It's been like centuries, And I'm like, enough
already. Okay. Let's time to let the handles have their moment. Okay. She's saying, you
know, can you turn on the water without a knob? No. Can you, you know, can you turn off the
music with them without a knob? No. And if I don't pick the right knob, then it's going
to be a daily remember of everything a daily reminder of everything
I did wrong, you know like one bad decision. Like what do you think having a baby's gonna be like?
Have you seen Tommy?
At least you can change a knob if you don't like it. Yeah, what goes what runs to your head when you look at your window
And you see your mother right there, okay. I think that's more of the pressing reminder
than a bunch of door knobs.
Well, fortunately, I don't think anything about MJ runs.
Yeah, that's true.
So,
Emier,
what do you think you're doing in there?
Meek, meek.
No, what are you doing with your handles?
What's your writing knobs?
You just don't know, Emier, what these knobs doing with your handles? What's your broadening jobs? He's a no biggie with these knobs are
Then we go over to a hook-alounge it's nighttime and
Resa is going it walks in there and
You question how are hook-alanges a thing?
You know, I hate hook-alanges. How are they a thing? Is it for sober people because
they don't have alcohol in there? And I'm just thinking who goes to like breathing air
fresh and or cold? It's like a thing. And I don't I don't know. I mean, I know that there's
like obviously like a cultural aspect to it. So I don't want to I don't want to cultural
you mean a cultural appropriation? Well, yeah, think about it.
Well, yeah, I mean, I'm not, I don't, I don't appropriate it because I really hate
Hookah. I hate Hookah.
Like I went to Hookah, I went to a birthday party at Hookah lounge like two
years ago. And I was like, I'm never going back to one of these because it's just
because I hate the smell.
I really hate the smell of fruity smoke.
It's disgusting.
I hate the smell and I really hate share.
It's like you're really realizing what it is
to be a human, sharing the same air with people.
You know, because they like bring you all these tubes
and then you're looking at maybe some of your grosser friends
like, ew, we're like both bubbling off of the same thing.
Yeah, to me, I get that sensation when I walk down the street
and someone has a vape pen and they,
um, and their vape is like fruity and all of a sudden you get this waft of just generic strange
frudiness and it, but it doesn't smell like fruit. It just is this weird smell, it's disgusting.
And I'm like, you know, I, I think it's really great that you're using a vape pen, you know, instead of a cigarette.
So you're not, you know, but like, you're still being a public nuisance.
Okay.
You're still entering in another scent that's not supposed to be there.
Okay.
Get a scentless vape pen and we can all enjoy this public space.
Well you should just start walking around with one of those freshener trees from a car
around your neck.
You could just get everybody back.
I'm just walking around with nasty glares.
I mean, I'm really on a, I'm just, I have been on a real soap box tear about muscle
cars and vape pens lately.
And it's, it's, it's all I have left.
Oh, well, being here in Vegas, everybody's smoking.
You can smoke indoors here at the casinos and stuff.
And it is so weird seeing that.
I'm not used to that anymore.
It's a strange thing.
So there's hook-aloud.
So, Resa's sitting there waiting for people to show up and MJ calls and she's like,
guess what?
You can't tell anyone, but Tara and Shervin have been fucking. This is Tara.
Tara, who we've seen on the fringes of the season, but we know her mainly from newly
weds, the first year, the last season that we saw was Tara and Robert, remember?
Yeah, but they're controlling ass husband.
Controlling ass husband. And I was like, and that's what I was like, you know,
honestly, if Tara and Shervin have been fucking, I fully ass husband. And I was like, and that's what I was like, you know, honestly, if Tara and Sherman have been fucking,
I fully support it because Shervin's, you know,
adorable, he's successful.
And Tara's husband sucked.
So I say get it girl.
You go system.
Yeah.
I feel.
I'm sure it's like a good move because he's like rich as F.
Yeah.
So take it sister.
So apparently Rob kicked her out of the house
after he found out.
And Riz is like, we know this girl Tara,
and she happens to be married to a very nice white man.
And then they show this clip of the girl,
which I don't know, just I don't know why that struck me
is on, but Riz is just such an asshole.
Yes.
They show a girl party clip around a pool or something,
and they're like, let's play truth.
Okay, so tell me the truth, Annalyze,
is it true that Sharv Sherman likes to be man-handled
in the bedroom and then Tara is like,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
but I can't believe you told her.
I told you that like really
smooth yeah smooth one Tara smooth we actually met Tara where do we meet Tara
remember we met her five show there are live show yeah Craig brought her to the
that's right from last year super sweet yeah she was super super sweet her boobs
are enormous yeah she's like so beautiful.
Yeah, I'm happy for her.
So if she was getting some of that shurven D,
oh well, at this point of the show, I was happy for her.
I changed my opinion over the course of the hour.
Are you sneezing?
It's going on over there.
So sorry.
I have been sneezing.
You sounded like you sounded like you're
horrified by something. Because I I said I changed my opinion you go
I'm trying to do it away from the microphone. I guess I'm not getting far enough away. I'm having like a sneezing fit
So let's see Raza
So so so so as again. What is it? What am I smelling? I don't like it. I don't like that. You're allergic to Vegas
Or maybe you're just allergic to just even the thought of huka
But MJ basically promises resin not to tell anyone and he's like, okay, I
Promise that to anyone and then of course as soon as he sits as he gets off the phone the guys arrived
So Mike arrives then churvin and Tommy so
You know, you know, fun. We watching Tommy hang out with him. I know he's like hey hey do I
super huh yeah alright. So he's there and then Mike is wearing like one of those
little mini Fedora things from Target. Yeah I suppose my big Fedora that I have
and now I feel weird wearing it because it's
so big.
Can I tell you that right that I got a big fedora?
Yeah, I can't get behind it but I support you.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I support you as a person that I can't support your fedora.
It looked so good in the store.
It really did and now I'm, I don't know about this
Fedora anymore. Although, if there is ever a mystery I need solved, you'll be the first
in my call. It's not that kind of Fedora. So anyway, so they order, you're like scanning
computers for viruses. So they order a case of Dia and hummus, which I thought was strange.
Like you've got hookah, hookah odors, and then you're going to have a quesadilla and hummus.
It just seemed all over the map.
And we learned that Mike has been constipated ever since Israel.
So maybe now I understand why Asa was craving her mom's food.
She had some bad, bad grains out there.
And they showed them at the airport, all of the friends were standing outside the airport
bathroom, you know, like, go, my, go, my, because he couldn't poop.
And then when he pooped, he comes out and they're all tearing.
I understand why Jessica left him.
She couldn't compete with the feces.
Also, I have to note that Tommy, when Tommy entered the music change to like a tuba section
I'm a marching band.
Tarty Tommy's theme.
It's like, it's like, dance music, dance music.
Hey guys, hey guys I'm here the mess lost
So so now so rest of course is not gonna say anything
But he's gonna make sure that Sherman takes himself into a hole
So he's like so tell me about I know least is she the one and he's like yeah, you know
I I never thought before but I think I'm doing like Erica Jane weird Erica Jane voice
I think I never thought I'd never have a I've never thought I always thought I'd have a person life
But now I'm realizing I can have a white life from Australia
Yeah, like this is the first girl that makes me realize that my wife doesn't have to be perjured
Wow
This is not a long and a sitting yeah
And then resa as as he talks, Resa's just like,
taking the bubble hit and then looking back and forth
guiltily, but like guiltily, it slashes
judgefully as he does.
Yes.
Where he's like, should I yell at him now or wait till there's more people here?
Yeah.
You could see he was waiting.
He was like, he probably got like a tip off that Tara was gonna come and like confront
Shervin in the party so he didn't want to like he didn't want to stage that moment. I would rather do this in a heart wig
So then the next day
GG and Shervin meet at a baby store and GG's you know
GG has now decided that she wants to be have baby fever too since all the other girls have it so she is now
ready to pop one out which is my friends having a baby. There's a penis growing inside of her
Really I am like
I'm like we understand when you first said that joke. It was a different continent
But like we've seen it now twice and you can't keep recycling that joke. It's not a good run joke
She's like yeah, she's not a good run joke. I don't know.
She's like, yeah, she's got a penis growing inside of her.
I know what it feels like to have a penis
shrinking inside of you.
I look forward to it.
I look forward to the other experience.
She's like, I wanna have a baby
because I've always wanted to have a baby.
I just wanna like have a baby and like make this baby
into someone better than I am. I'm like, okay, well, you can like give it like a bag of M&M's and you're already like three steps ahead of you
She says as a kid I wanted a whole football team of babies because they're so pure
Football players, I mean maybe suck
I still got this thing growing inside of me. What's it called, baby fever?
I said, girl, the minute you get pregnant, you're going to have the most historic baby
because she's going to get pregnant hit six months and that baby is going to start
like running out of her womb.
They're going to be like a baby, a baby literally crawled out of somebody's vagina and
started running down the street.
It's going to be a little bit of a miss. I also like to say, I feel like the GG is...
I know she's suddenly decided she wants, she has baby FOMO,
but she will not be allowed to use pregnancy brain
as an excuse for any of her actions this season.
Okay, we're not allowing that.
Oh, she doesn't use any part of her brain for her actions.
So she's like, her ringer is like... Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring,. So she's like, her ringer is like,
ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring,
I wasn't, it was like a card matter or something
or a top end.
It's, it's dummy.
Who?
Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up
on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court.
I'm Matt Bellasai. And I'm Sydney Battle,
and we're the hosts of Wonder Woman's new podcast, Dis and Tell.
Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity view,
from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions.
What does our obsession with these feuds say about us?
We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between
Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly
innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown,
alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and
the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling,
and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative
designed to sell albums?
Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts.
You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or wonder ya.
So Gigi is gonna have an 80, did you say?
You said it's home-hoo.
Oh, I'm all me who? I said who? Who?
Who?
Who?
Oh, me, can you hear me?
But um, um, here in the thaaan the haaaan the haaaan the haaaan
So, um, yeah, it's like ring ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, it's my daughter, excuse me. Ring ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, what's the the
the
the
the one-of-a-
the ringtone alone
and
the guy like I'm like done with you know. So, uh, let's see here.
It's the doctor's office saying that she, um, she's been off, she's gonna be, um, she
just stopped using her RA medication last week, so she can get pregnant.
And in two months, she can start trying for a baby.
I'm like, this does not seem wise on many different levels.
Yeah, you know, I love conspiracies.
I read like a conspiracy websites and stuff. And it's really hard to not think that this show is
just trying to get the country to root for forced sterilization. Yeah. You know,
I think something's coming down the pike, you guys. You heard it your first. Yeah, I
think so. But she's like, yeah, I thought I was going to have to wait six months to
get pregnant with this guy that I've been dating for two weeks, but I only have to wait two months
She was like, uh, you know, that's what they call like, Rashi get. Okay, here's Rashi get
Here's how you just define Rashi get too much dating somebody then you're talking about pregnancy
Then you can attach you on your body
Look you're you have an interesting order to those.
Yeah.
So then, GG is, it starts telling Shervin about MJ's gossip that she's starting to
spread.
She's really talking about it.
And of course, Shervin denies it.
No, I never did that.
But what was interesting to me was that the producers inserted some flashback footage from
newlyweds.
It was not from Shaz, which obviously it's all Bravo, so it's no big deal, but I thought
that was sort of like surprising.
You don't often see flashbacks to entirely different shows and franchises on Bravo for
the crossover, but I was happy for it.
What was the flashback? I forgot.
It was just their wedding. It's just their wedding. But part of me was thinking,
you know, Rob was a dick, but Tara was the woman who like basically
destroyed their entire Italian trip because on the drive to L.A.X.
She had so much anxiety that they had to turn around and go back to Malibu and
a two vacation was canceled.
Yeah. Um, remember, then they had that rem around and go back to Malibu and a two-week vacation was canceled. Yeah.
Remember, and then they had that remodel?
Oh, God.
They're like, we can't even live in our house.
Then they just got more terrible cabinetry.
That was a good thing.
I mean, we knew that.
We knew that relationship was never going to last because he was like a control freak asshole,
you know, who would do weird yoga shit in the corner.
And she's her.
So I'm glad it's over.
I'm glad it's over.
And Gigi's also so full of shit because in that clip that we saw earlier where it looked
like Tara was like, oh my god, I can't believe you mentioned that I said, serving likes
to be manhandled or whatever.
Gigi goes, I would never suspect that Tara,
a married woman would be messing around with Sherr,
even though she's known this like the whole time.
Yeah.
And Sherrvin's like,
well, that's not even true, dude.
Like, it's almost funny.
Like, I don't even know where this is coming from.
It's almost funny.
It's like the big bang theory.
Ha ha ha ha. Like, is there like a little baby outfit is coming from. It's almost funny. It's like the big bang theory.
Is there like a little baby outfit that says it's almost funny because I could get that as I get because it's true. It's true. I mean not the not the rumor. That's a lie, but it's almost
funny. That's true. Is there some kind of ledsy that says you're f**king crazy stupid bitch like
boil of money, okay, bitch? Read my lips. No, my lips.
Stop looking at your reflection in my hair.
My lips.
I did not have sexual relations with that lady.
Do you have a y'all because it would fit me
at this baby's door?
Do you guys have bobby pins?
Could you tell Israel about them?
Thanks.
Yeah.
They sell toy guns there. Oh by way one of our listeners made I think it was one of our listeners made a really
good point about that whole toy gun situation. I'm talking about how dumb these
people were saying that like those age recommendations have nothing to do with
like who their target those those toys are targeted for. It's just a safety thing.
Like, don't make, don't let kids under three
near this because they may eat it something
and they may choke.
So it wasn't like, look, it's toy guns for three year olds.
No, it's saying if you're three years older,
three years older, younger, you can't play with this
because it's a choking hazard.
See you.
Um. Glad I clear that up everyone.
It's really important to know that regulations on Israeli toys. I want to make sure we're all
on the same page here. I don't want any regulatory committee to go unrecognized, okay? So, stupidity, stupidity, stupidity, stupidity, stupidity.
So then, Resa.
So now Resa and Adam go over to like a cat,
one of those cat cafes, which I really want to go to.
Is that a dream?
Like Resa?
Yeah, there's, it is a thing.
And I thought there's only one in,
I thought there's like one in Koreatown,
maybe there were more.
But like Resa, I love cats.
So I would totally go there and like look at cats and drink a latte.
Okay.
God.
It's like, what is happening right now?
He's like, yeah, ever since we went to that wonderful trip in Thailand or whatever, with
that Adam, like, I love cats, all kinds of cats.
I love that pussy not that kind
So Adam's like you know what this reminds me of babies. Yeah, I must be a baby
So I click look at this cat. It could be our baby. Ow
How that hurt and I think he understood what I was saying
Take this as a sign, okay
He's
going to take the cat to lunch and have to tell the cat. I told people for an entire week
that I was slapped by Gigi. Okay, because you maul me in the face. He's like, man, whatever
I've recovered from my abbey. I'm on a baby. I'm like, uh, you said if the compromise
was I was a thought adoption lady in the indoor house for you to horrify if you would just go get your sperm
Adalized
And res is like listen, I want to adopt. I'm trying to keep the adoption dream alive. I'm watering that motherfucker. I'm like, oh god
But Adam's whipping his dick out and saying
It looks like we're gonna have to go down the surrogacy route,
which I think was always the plan,
and he just wants to do this adoption thing
to like try and look like a good person.
Oh, yeah.
Not that he's ever, you know, I mean,
that shows some human growth,
because I don't know that he's really ever tried that before.
But I don't even believe he even wants to have a kid to be honest.
I think this is Adam's weird, it's not a weird thing because it's a pretty like central
part of human existence, but like I think it's Adam's, I think it's his cause, Celebrate
to have a child.
I think Riz is just like, bitch, I just want another brooch.
And he says, we'll have to start spooning tomorrow because I already
checked off once today. And then I just
had, you know, like everybody else who
watch this, just that flash of an
image of what that would be like. And
I'm telling you, again, for sterilization,
you see what I'm saying with this show?
This is probably some traumatized cat in
the back room.
The cats are all running up against the glass walls.
That's not milk. You're licking.
So Mike, we now go to Mike and his business partner.
And they're like in his room, like going through his house, going through like inventory or stock or whatever.
And they're just like talking about business and likes talking
about being entrepreneur
and how hard it is and how he got into Kitsin
but then Kitsin went bankrupt
and now they still all this money from him
and now he's gonna be keep going forward.
So the big thing is that now Mike is selling baby shoes
which is hilarious to me.
I just imagine these little shoes having
like these black drawn in beards.
Like each piece goes with the eyebrow pencil.
Yeah. And also I love that he's talking about how shocked he is that he got screwed over.
Didn't last season end with him driving to the border of Mexico to pick up shoes from the fucking shoes smugglers or whatever?
Yeah, he showed up for the last 10 minutes of his own party because he drove down to Mexico.
Yeah, it was so ridiculous.
He's like, yeah, you know, like I plant my flag and I stand behind my shoes and it reminds
me of my grandfather who came to this country and struggled for pink suede shoes.
And then not just to this in future, I will be the preachy arc of my family. It's like you,
you're ridiculous. Please don't try to ever take care of anybody ever.
A peachy arc. What?
A peachy arc. I just want to know what is going on with this cast this season. They all want to have babies.
It's actually getting annoying. It makes me want them to bring back Sammy from season one at this point. I mean anything.
Samy. It's, Tommy's kind of like the white version of Sammy.
He kind of is. Yeah, except he doesn't work from a homad.
Or where the door is or whatever those like golf at. He's aware. Yes. Yeah. See. He
was. So now it lunch. A serving in the MJ are having lunch and MJ is wearing a wolf shirt,
which you know, watch out to sign.
Yeah, so she's like, I'll order a glass of sous-villume, Blanc.
And he gets to make a lot of it.
These people fucking kidding.
Yeah, we just heard Pee-T-Yark and now we're going to sous-villume.
Well, have a shurvin who orders a mickle outta,
but hold the tomato mix, just give me the beer
with some lime juice and salt.
I'm like, that's just called a corona.
It's a corona with a lime.
You don't have to be like mickle outta hold the tomato.
No, that doesn't, you don't get,
so that's like saying, I'll have a bloody marry,
hold the tomato juice, and hold the horse radish, and hold everything else in the olives. Just give me vodka on the rocks.
Yeah, give me a bloody Mary, but no orange juice.
None of the hot sauce or horse radish from anything like that.
I'll have a virgin margarita, but could you add in like maybe like some extra sugar
into that and maybe you could just swap out the lime for lemon.
That would be great.
Yeah, you just order lemonade.
I'm really on a tear tonight.
I'm on a tear.
Not going to be satisfied until I get all these thoughts off my chests.
Can I just have an Arnold Palmer, but just like Thomas?
Can we just have like, you know what, I get an Arnold Palmer, but like, hold
the lemonade, thanks. Can I just get a palm? So a proper Palmer I hear that you're
Resistible oh my ex like no sorry he's working with me. It's my partner
MJ Sherman so they go to lunch and Sherman's like
Yeah, well ready to add to the fans GG. You know go talking about how penis is always shriek with their side of her
and stuff. And then I'm just like, ah, two years about baby rumors. And then he said,
well, she told me that you said that the someone said that I was fucking 70 blah, blah,
blah. And you know, it's just that I'm really upset and I'm hurt that you would like talk
to me first. And she's like, he's so controlling.
Like, he invited me to lunch for damage control.
I said, how is that controlling?
Are you spreading shit about him?
And he did a nice thing.
And it's actually taking you to lunch to confront you about it.
You fucking twat.
Yeah, absolutely.
Absolutely.
And he who has nothing to do with anything that's spreading all this bullshit just to hurt
somebody else. Yeah. I did think though, that's spreading all this bullshit just to hurt somebody else.
Yeah.
I did think though, that was a,
I think you're absolutely right.
I also think that it was a total tell on Shervin's part
to say, I don't know why he didn't come to me with this
because that shows he's more concerned about his image
than being like, no, this didn't happen at all.
I don't know why anyone was saying this.
That's kind of crazy. I wish I had banged her. You know, it's something like that. But the fact that he was like, I don't know why anyone was saying this. That's kind of crazy. I wish I had banged her
You know something like that, but the fact he's like, I don't know why you didn't come to me first
Sort of implies like aside from like stop spreading gossip for hear my side of the story
But it also implies like if you're talking to me first maybe we could have you know put a spin on this or whatever, you know, yeah
So he's like, yeah, it's leaping through.
It's just like it's crazy.
She's telling everyone she's seeing people, you know,
that she's saying it's me.
I mean, she's insane.
She has her problems.
Yeah, like she's like nuts.
She's just cuckoo.
I like how you're impersonation of Shervin
just to be with my impersonation of Shervin.
Yeah, they're Sher Yeah, I totally agree.
Great point.
I like what he did because I get better with bad because he has a really good impression
of him.
I'm just sure of you know, he just had to like basically take Erica Jane and have her
like wake up after an hour of cigarette and drinking.
That's all.
And MJ of course is just doing this for a woman kind.
Yes.
Because she's like, you know, Tara, it's like she has this husband and then she just left
him because she thought that she would be able to be with Shervin, but she didn't realize
that Shervin just wants to serve.
So she ruined her marriage for nothing.
It's like, wow, way to really help the good person in this situation. MJ. Just like Matt for the one he just totally fucked over her husband.
Yeah, exactly.
On the channel TV.
But this will be again, this is one of those few times where we actually support that.
We support her leaving Rob for sure.
Yes, I do.
Yes.
So then we go over to the intercontinental, I believe, downtown.
And MJ shows up at a hotel room.
Tommy's in this hotel room.
It's one of these new, fangled hotel room decor things.
Have you seen this before where the bed is
in the middle of the room?
It's weird.
It's weird.
I saw it once at the SLS here in,
in like West Hollywood-ish.
It's awful.
I don't understand this idea.
It's, because I, you put the desk behind the bed
And then you can see the desk and watch the TV, but you can put the beds all so there too. I hate it. I think it's terrible
Well, I just hate knowing that these gorgeous rooms like you have to pay for all this you have to pay all this money for these rooms
And then just to see mj and Tommy fucking you there. It's like is anything really ever worth it?
You know Tommy fucking your merits like is anything really ever worth it?
Just staying never going in every house again. Yeah, I'm not going into continental until it's fully fumigated I want to see a termate termite tent around that hotel now
Yeah, they're trying to they basically are trying to have sex because they want to have a baby
Or as MJ says oh you can do it because you're about to say it. Oh, no, I was just
going to say she goes, I'm not really sure what all of you are lading is, but I have to
have sex five times while that's happening. So we're going to have sex five times. And then
she goes, I feel like today might be the day for him to plant his seed inside of me.
And then she went on for another two minutes,
saying that in different ways. And I, I couldn't hear it over the wretching in the bathroom.
I was watching like half-tued peanut M&M swimming around in the toilet at that point.
Oh, I want an M&M. Obviously M&M is around my brain today, but I'd love Tommy. He's like, you look beautiful baby
Drink his weird opaque orange drinks. It was also strange. Yeah, he's like I haven't checked off in a week
Well, let's talk about something romantic. He's like I just need to stick it in someplace
Let's talk about something romantic music. I just need to stick it in some place.
You've come to the wrong place to talk about romantic talk.
Let's talk about something romantic.
Babe, I didn't know you want to talk about the Mets.
What do you mean you went to a knobs toy?
You got a knob right here.
Hey, babe, what do you want?
The handle or the knob, huh?
Because I got both baby
Nobs, nobs, nobs and sticks
That's not even the movie. Hey milk milk lemonade round the corner chocolate's made it my right, huh?
Baby I'm gonna load a bunch of dead sperm
Those things have been exhausted and they died four days ago. Come on
Hey, the GG's part we cut out of here before the entire camera crew get sick and starts committing suicide. Yeah
So we go over to GG's 80s party and she's like most people are afraid of 35
But I have good plastic surgeon, so I'm not scared. I mean, that's why I like 25.
25 years older than you were 10. You were 10, yes, I agree.
So Shalom and Mike have a moment
because they both dresses like Run DMC, which is fine.
And then, and then Asa shows up.
And she's like, look, Asa, look what I got you,
a wheelchair.
I mean, this is too much. I'm sorry. It's too much. I understand pregnancy is a burden, but like the wheelchair for
us to come on. And osse is like, thank you, especially for the nachos. Like that's all the
osse cares about her nachos. Yeah. Like she's so into them. So you see MJ come in and she's,
I'll just just looking at her like fuck you,
but also thing with her hair because she's nervous.
And she's like, hello.
And then she's like, eh, eh.
And then she says, she's so fake.
She's just a fake, fake, fake.
So those two still hate each other.
Yeah, and also things that she's toxic
Yeah, and then we basically
Okay, you go for it cuz I'm so fun fight. Well, there was also there was also a really awkward moment where Gigi
Tells Asa in front of Shalom. Oh by the way, I haven't told Shalom this but in two months
I'm ready to start having a baby and you could see him
I haven't told Shlom this, but in two months, I'm ready to start having a baby.
And you could see him, like,
ready to throw himself in front of an oncoming roller skater,
hoping it has the same effect as a MAC truck.
It was just a less talbot himself.
So he just, he kind of walked away.
He's like, what?
He's like, geez, she's like, yeah.
You know, remember that time you said,
how did we in the hallway?
Now we're about to have a baby together.
Yeah.
So now Tara shows up and Tara's with our buddy Craig,
our sweet adorable wonderful Craig,
also from Nilly Wed's the first year.
That's how we all met each other, know each other.
So Craig is there looking so cute in his little tennis
is brilliant, was a polo shirt and like little shorts shorts.
Yeah, I think he was like the revenge of the nerds.
Oh, okay.
We do.
He's like one of the crappy guys.
We find he's so he's so Craig.
Yeah.
First of all, he's wearing that.
He's like a wearing a pink sweater around a white polo shirt.
Yes.
And then in the ice skater and the roller rating ring skating rake,
Adam Katsky, Shalom Calt skate.
No one can skate.
But then they just show Craig zooming by like an Olympic skater.
You know, his arms are like swinging out.
It's like he's doing triple pair pirouettes.
Like reaching into his mama mia, like grab back of tricks that he can
adapt to the roller rank.
Yeah, he's like putting the work his goal starlight express moves
I didn't realize that was Craig. I thought that was just some other person, but it wouldn't surprise me if it was Craig
Oh, I thought it was Craig. I was like of course
Well, you could just say credit because I know he could probably do it. He's probably like roller skating on the ceiling
So so while while Craig is like Nancy Kerriguing out on the roller rink
So, so while Craig is like Nancy Carrigan out on the roller rink, we learn from Gigi that
she invited, by the way, do you hear this helicopter outside? This is Gigi arriving. It's what it's like to drive it for Gigi.
So Gigi, because you said Nancy Carrigan, I was like, and Gigi is getting her
ton your hearting stick ready to fucking slam somebody in the knees, you know,
the police are overhand.
Yeah.
Perfect.
Who's Jeff Galuli though?
Who?
So, Sherman, probably.
So basically, Gigi tells us that she had Tara and Tara and Sherman over and he admitted
to Gigi that it happened, but that she agreed to keep it a secret and not say anything to anyone.
So I'm like, okay, that's great.
You're now telling us everything right in front of you, or on TV telling us.
And there's no evidence that she's kept a secret at all, except that she didn't call
every single person on speaker phone.
She's like, well, I'm really close friends with him.
So I'm going to keep secret.
You are not going to keep secret.
You are not going to keep his secret.
Absolutely not.
But this was like kind of a, this is pretty bombshellly,
that he would admit it and then try to get
to you to help cover it up.
Because if there's one thing that these people can't do,
it's cover anything up.
And I mean that both literally and figuratively.
Oh, the best was, they were, okay, so they were all, um, I just saw like MJ in every outfit
she's ever worn.
As you said that, I'm just sitting here like laughing at the in my brain, montage.
I'm really terrible MJ outfits.
So they're all like, you know, there's a lot of like side eye about like,
I can't believe what Sherman's done.
There's Tarras here, yada yada yada.
So Tarrar and Craig are hanging out
and Sherman shows up and everyone was surprised.
No one thought Sherman was gonna show up
because the whole scandal everything.
But he shows up with a gift
and this crazy blonde mullet wig
and Craig is there in the corner.
And Craig is like, is he really wearing that wig?
What is he doing?
What's he thinking?
He's gonna do in that wig.
It looks hideous.
And then he like, he shrugs.
He shrugs and sips his drink and looks away and rolls his eyes
and the producers go,
tsh, when he rolls his eyes.
He's like this.
Craig was not having it.
Which is funny because when we met when we met
it's because Craig introduced us to Shervin.
Yeah, so I guess they all made that.
Yeah.
Um, so what else happened here?
So Craig get to the fight.
Get to the fight.
I am. This is all part of the fight.
This is all part of the fight.
So, so then, um, so Shervin comes in and so then,
so Craig basically takes over Tara.
He's like, he's like, come on.
Let's move over here. Let's get a, she's like, I just don't want to talk to him. He's like, come on, let's move over here.
Let's get a, she's like, I just don't want to talk to him.
She's like, no, we're going to, we're going to move you over here,
which is funny that like the newlyweds people are basically
taking over the shots of sunset scene right now.
So, so Resa, then,
uh, starts, Resa starts talking to Tara about it.
And he's like, why did you ever say anything?
And like, like, why did you say anything the first thing is, why did you open your mouth about this? You
lost your husband as a result. Why would you do that? So yeah, why would you totally,
why would you, what would you do to your husband? You a husband. It's like, how is this
idea of fucking resus business? Yeah. Why? Why is it always on the show? Resus always gets everybody
to go gang up on somebody. I hate it
Yeah, so now Tara starts getting annoyed because she's she's getting annoyed just because she's like driven scum
She doesn't say that but she's basically
Pretty much saying it in as many words and she's she's saying you know like you know like analyst should know like what sort of asshole
He is you know look at the way he's treating me look how what what a dick he's being to me and like you know, like, Annalise should know, like, what sort of asshole he is, you know, like, look at the way he's treating me,
look what a dick he's being to me,
and like, you know, Annalise should get out
because she doesn't know what sort of mess
she's got in herself involved with, you know?
So while she's bitching about Shervin,
Shervin can tell,
sometimes it's going up,
so we have to come regulate.
So he comes in, joins the group,
and they're like, did you have sex in terror?
And she's like, no, no, are you crazy?
Are you sick and he basically starts acting like Tara is the crazy person here when he clearly had sex with her
Yeah, and he literally says
Well, you need to start taking pills
Because you're delusional. Yeah, yeah
Delusional is totally on your head. I don't even know what you're talking about Why is it this big of a deal? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was a totally old your head. I don't even know what you're talking about
Why is it this big of a deal? Yeah, I mean, I will say that
If you're fucking around with somebody and you both agree to keep it secret and the one of you doesn't
That's not cool. So that's not cool of her to be telling everybody
Yeah, especially when she's using it as an excuse
to get rid of her husband. He didn't sign up for that. But also this, this is the great
American tradition of mansplaining to women in this kind of sending way. She's the crazy
one. She's crazy. She needs to be on the other side of the way. What's wrong with you? What's
wrong with your brain? That when I have sex with you, that night, or telling people
that we have sex, that we had sex that's crazy
That's how good my dick is it just makes it makes the ladies that's and then off the side
Micah sitting there going whatever she wanted it. He's just trying to get some
Yeah, they're super classy. So finally rest upa, he's all pissed off whatever.
And he said, wait, and he says this, this is so insulting. He goes,
Sherman turns to Resa and goes, listen, Resa, I could get any girl I want. Like I could do any,
like I could walk it. It's easy for me to get a girl. Like this, it's not even my type. Like
it says it right into Tara's face. It's so insulting, Shervin. And you know, we love Shervin. We stand up for you, Shervin
But this is not right. So you're being an asshole
MJ's like
Well, you know, Shervin really likes secret down those shit
I mean shit that's not even just like downtown. It's like across three bridges around a corner in a basement
It's like across three bridges around a corner in a basement through a tunnel up some stairs into like a leg drawer
Leg door where you open it and then you have to you know swim through the lake and then like you write an alligator to a castle And then like climb the castle wall and then it's like under a tree
Okay
She just took it so far. She's like, that's what gets his dick card.
The secretive part. Yeah.
So then, GG, so basically now Reza goes outside and GG tells Reza that Shurvin told her that
he did have sex with Tara. So then Shurvin is like, is like I mean res is like huh so he goes back inside the the rolling ring and he's like
Shervin go necessary factor and you made it to her yelling in front of
everybody yeah like that's so him and I love how he got the info to he like
storms outside what you do smoking and he's like, did you tell me the truth? Did he tell you or did he not?
So then, I can't believe you would blame.
I'm so excited.
So the Adam's like, Adam is behind
Resa talking to somebody else walking inside
and he goes, he's a liar.
Laya, liar, liar.
I'm so curious.
It's such a little bitch.
Your husband is enough of an asshole without you chiming in for no reason fucking add up
What the fuck do you care? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
Team Gays riled up, you know, really skates and team guys so
So now Shervin and GG are talking because Shervin is basically now Shervin is gonna continue the gaslighting on to on to GG
And he's still denying that he
ever did anything with her.
But then he decides to pull this one move which I think was really sneaky.
It was the way I think he was trying to get himself off the hook.
He's like, you know what?
You want me to say I did?
I'll say I did.
It makes me feel better.
It makes everyone feel better.
I'll do it.
I'll say I did.
I'll do it.
No, just make you feel better.
I'll do it.
I'll say yes.
I slept with her.
I slept with her for six months,
and I know every single part of her body. I know that her G spot is up and in and a little
bit to the left. I know all of it. There. Does that make you feel a little bit better?
Because I said that. Okay, great. It's like, hmm. I know what you're doing here. You are
admitting to the truth, but you're framing it as if you're doing it to make people feel better about us that way it's plausible
that if on a lease saw this you could say no i just had to make them to get them
off my case but actually what you're doing is your best you're owning up to
in a in a shitty way so i know you're doing you can have a both ways driven
well amulis is still dating him despite the fact that on their first date, he was such
a prick to her.
Yeah.
And such a show of an asshole.
So I really don't feel sorry for that blow up doll.
I don't care.
I don't feel bad for her at all, to be honest, because she knew what she's, I mean,
sheerven's a player.
They're in a totally different hemisphere times times two Eastern western hemisphere and northern southern.
Okay.
And so she should know better.
Find find someone better for you in Australia.
Okay.
I love Reza.
He's like, oh my God.
Listen here, Bill Clinton.
There's already sperm on the dress.
Secure and idiot.
My favorite part in all of this was Adam catching people up on gossip.
He's like, you about not how they bath.
That girl totally fucked blah, blah, blah, and Asaka, you guys like babes.
I don't mean it interrupt, but these nachos, these nachos are amazing.
And then Adam just looks it, they're like,
ah.
I just wish one of you babes would have gotten me
these nachos for me.
They're like, we did.
Where do you think those came from?
I just feel so physically alone.
I just feel so bad that you guys put a jalapeno on here
and try to kill my baby babes.
So nevertheless, as the episode ends,
Shervin gives us a new story, which is like,
yeah, no, no, all I did was I met up with her.
I met up with her because she was told that I give really good advice. So we had drinks and I think, that's why I give advice to her.
Not all that happened.
She'd make the rest up, even though I said I give the best advice when I'm naked and inside you.
That's all.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Didn't he say at one point, she did hit Abbi,
like she tried it with me, like she tried it
with me a couple of times and I told her husband.
Didn't he say something like that?
He did say that at some point.
And I was like, you told her husband
that she was hitting on you. Why would you
tell the husband if this is a girl that you've only met like three times? Yeah, I'm not
really sure why would you even get involved? Like, you know, it's just it's weird. But in the
end, I have to have it. I have to have it to Tara and to Destiny. I mean, it's not easy
getting a job on a well-established reality show when you've already been on other shows, you know.
Yeah, they're both recycled.
Desi was on People's Catch.
Tara was on Newlyweds first year, so.
Yeah, so props to them because you know Tara is going to be on this cast.
Yeah, well, she should be.
She's probably next year.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Did you hang up on me, Ben?
No, I'm here.
Ben, did you hang up on me because I don't hear you, Ben? No, I'm here Ben did you hang up on me because I don't hear you Ben? No, I'm here. Oh my god
Ben, well, I'll just wrap this up because did you the end me bang? This is the end of the episode and Ronnie can't hear me
So anyway everyone come to our live show come to watch our crap and calm to get tickets
We love urine from you. Ronnie has already disappeared
into the Las Vegas night and I'm going to let disappear into the Los Angeles night. Thanks everyone
so much. We'll be back tomorrow to talk some real housewives of Orange County. Bye!
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