Watch What Crappens - Shahs: Inglorious Bastards
Episode Date: October 24, 2017Part 1 of the "Shahs of Sunset" reunion gave us all the classy stuff: casual racism, bastard accusations, and man-buns Who could ask for anything more? See acast.com/privacy for privacy and ...opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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We are starting off a fresh new week.
We're a week and a half away from our big San Francisco show.
If it is your first time tuning in to watch or crap and well then far be it for me to not let you
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a show in San Francisco at Social Hall San Francisco. November 4th I haven't checked in to
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but there cannot be many left, because we were a week and a half ago at around 35.
Yeah, we've got to be like 10 tickets. Come on, guys, let's crawl to that finish line.
We want to sell this mofo out. Please, please stop torturing us.
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Be like you do sort of like Bravo. Do you ever the top chef? Great, let's go to the show.
We're not having to talk about top chef.
Yeah, we'll walk a mile each for one ticket each.
We should make those little marital farms
like Orange School, yeah.
Oh, walk a thorn for ourselves.
Guys, we're raising money for ourselves.
We will make one pop over for every ticket we sell from now on.
Actually, believe it or not, we're not just self-centered assholes. We will make one popover for every ticket we sell from now on actually
Believe it or not. We're not just self-centered assholes
We are going to donate some proceeds to recovery efforts for the the northern California region that was ravaged by those
Crazy forest fire firestorms. My cousin is up there. He is up in Yukia
And he was lucky their whole community was lucky,
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But we're going to donate some of the proceeds from those
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So you just get over the, yeah.
That's a big long way of saying go to watchocrabbons.com to get tickets.
Now speaking of people who donate nothing to nobody,
to anybody, the size of sunset reunion. Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun It's basically when Resa attacks.
Who's Resa gonna go for this year?
Resa.
Now he's got his little army firmly in his clutches.
He's always had MJ and Mike, but now they know what it's like to completely be turned against
by Resa and have their lives ruined.
They are gonna go harder than ever against whoever he aims them at. Yeah. Just so they don't get attacked again.
Well, guess what?
You fucking assholes.
You will be attacked again next year.
Absolutely.
You helped get rid of Assa.
Yeah.
Exactly.
And probably Serbing.
So good luck.
Yeah.
So Assa, they all arrive at this reunion here in Los Angeles.
Assa shows up with a tote bag that says, grateful, which is nothing inherently wrong with
that, but they get the greatest. Assa, it's really annoying., which is nothing inherently wrong with that, but the answer is,
it's really annoying.
Yes, there is something wrong
with that. There's something
huge wrong with that. We all know
there is. And it's hard because
I'm rooting for Asa, you know,
and this reunion. I mean,
also is a dick, but I like
Asa. She's hilarious. I don't
want Asa to leave the show.
I want to watch her like,
have a doll that's facing away
from the cameras and just have her heading its head and being like yeah babe
Yeah, babe because her husband or her boyfriend won't let her have the real baby
I want to see like all the ways that Asa is a mother on the show without an actual baby in her arms
That's true. I mean her arc is pretty much gonna be over
I yeah, I found that I was rooting for
us too because as much as she was an asshole all season long, as much as she was throwing
at everyone's face, I'm pregnant, I'm pregnant. Oh, what was me? I still found, like, when
you get all these people together, she's actually the most reasonable of all of them, which
is sad.
Yes. Even when she comes out them with facts, they find a way to twist and turn it around
and throw a back at her.
And she just rolls her eyes like, I should have known.
She doesn't cry because she should have fucking known.
She helped Resa last year and the year before.
So she's kind of getting her just desserts.
Yes, but if there's any look that's more ridiculous
than also with a bag that says grateful,
it would have to be Shervin.
Shervin went or I, this reunion in the styling department.
His beard was like a little overgrown for my taste, but that's not the real issue.
The real problem is that he was doing a man bun.
And man buns went out of style about 18 months ago, and even then they were 10 USH at best.
And if you're going to do a man bun you gotta do it better just be better sure then make a better man bun because it was
too small so it just look like a balloon knot you know not to make a reference to
blow deck but it did look like a balloon knot and on top of that his sides were not shaped
like if you're gonna do the man bun the sides have to be really high on tight and his sides
were like normal so it just look like he was getting his bangs out of the way because he's about to do
dishes or something.
Well, it's, you know, look, most people know they're going into battle.
They put on armor, most of us in this world either do a lot of drugs or eat a lot of food
like to put on the weight, you know, to be your armor.
And he's just more and more hair, you know, he's basically two little eyes poking out of. A big, big pile of hair.
Yeah, and I think I get fresh red because he's so handsome.
He's so handsome.
He's like handsome and cute and hot.
He's like a little bit of a mix of everything.
A little hot, a little cute, little handsome.
And I was like, sure, why, why did you, why must you do this to yourself?
What's happening here?
Well, you know, I'm always putting off dating.
I love to be single, but most of it
is because I really just want to marry everybody
that I date.
And so I have to think, who's the best person
for me to actually marry?
And one thing I've done started to do
is imagine what this person looks like fat,
because that's important.
Yeah.
Like you have to deal with different weights and stuff
mostly because of myself.
I have to be like, well, I got thin for you for a month.
Okay, so there's that.
And then you also have to accept what they're gonna look like
in the future if they're ever in the hospital
because you know, you have to take care
of each other throughout life.
Yeah.
And when someone's in the hospital
and then they become that
because they just are not shaving or like doing their hair or whatever. That's a problem
Yeah, if you ever wind up in the hospital and somehow emerge with a man bun
Then there are some real issues with the medical system. It looks like a full-on Bible beard
Yeah, it's like oh my god. How many animals are you putting on that one fucking boat dude?
He probably shaved three hours ago too
But so I think also I also I also like oh sorry babe. No
I was gonna say as long as we're on the topic of of hair styling. I think also it's time to have a heart to heart with Indy Cohen
He has been rocking this hairstyle for the past six or eight weeks
It's like sort of a grown-out
six or eight weeks. It's like sort of a grown out,
almost like a pseudo 1970s,
like vaguely Tom Schneider look,
where it's just like the sides are like long,
I think he's going for like a longer, wavier thing,
but it's not like long hair,
it doesn't look like long hair,
it's like short hair cut, but it's long.
And you like normally used to have like,
sort of like a tighter cut,
and now it's sort of like, it's sort of like, it's like wide.
It's a wide cut.
It's like 80s.
Like it's like kind of the 80s coming back.
It's a little shaggy.
It's like, yeah, it's a little like a very dad.
It's very dadlike and it's aging him.
And people are saying that, you know,
like, ooh, Andy does not look in this reunion.
He, I mean, he looks fine.
It's just that the hair is aging him.
So Andy, we say, go back towards more of a gay haircut
because that looks a little sharper on you.
Well, I think that he just knows so many people in fashion
that he knows what's coming before we do, you know?
Like sometimes on these TV shows,
I remember a few years ago on the Bachelor,
I was like, why is everybody wearing such short pants?
Like the cuffs are like almost above the ankles. Is it up there? Is there a flood, you know, because I'm old,, I was like, why is everybody wearing such short pants? Like the coughs are
like almost above the ankles. Is it up? Is there a flood? You know, because I'm old. So it's like,
hey, you expect the flood. But then of course, they're everywhere. It just takes a little bit of time
for the rest of us to catch up. Who knows? Maybe we'll all be wearing like a little bit too long
way. I don't give a fuck. It's because it's the 80s hair. To be fair, you can't be at fault for
thinking that thinking there'd be a flood on a show where people
pair off in two by two and they all look like giraffes.
True.
And if God was going to flood anything, it would be because of the show.
Just a small, localized flood at the bachelor house.
It'd be a very small, like, don't even bother in the arc.
We'll just...
Reset. Like if God's going to call a mulligan on any time, at any time, it's this one. I think a very small like don't even bother in the arc. We'll just
Reset like if God's gonna call a Mulligan on any time at any time. It's this one
So Raza opens this in a terrible red suit with little stars on the side. Yeah, I can't with the press a lady It's like we're gonna have some more
You pull up. We're gonna have some more you pull up each moment's people
We're gonna have some more Polish moments, people. Yeah, which made me think they were gonna bring out another father for us as baby or something good.
I feel like Resa was auditioning for the Persian mask.
This suit was so bonkers.
I was just expecting his face to turn green and he just started wooing Cameron Diaz or something.
It just, nothing was right.
The stars were why the collar,
but then he wore a tie, it was like black tie
that had like some weird white stripes.
And then like, not again, the return of the star.
It was, I know he wanted to do something loud
and very, you know, sort of like,
we're working crazy, but you're still,
you're still okay, you still have to represent
our culture too.
Yeah, like
represent also the mustache free. Resa not into it. It comes and goes, you know, I think he's he's
been doing it for the reunion lately. I feel like I don't know. I don't like it. You can see all the
bitterness at least with the mustache. You don't see his lip curl like that in that mean way. It's like,
oh, maybe resa's just just gonna be fun and nice today,
not ruined anybody.
But then now you can see that bare lip just kinda curling
and it's like, oh, here he comes.
Yeah, exactly.
I would not wanna be sure of it today, boo.
So Andy greets everyone in Farsi.
You know, I don't know what he,
he's just, he's based, I'm not even gonna try to impersonate
Farsi because I'll just find a sounding racist
Just him basically saying hello. How are you high? And they're like oh Andy good job, Andy June. Oh Andy
Gigi's like look at me. I'm very so so fee of a garter right now because her boobs are all over the place
She's like I'm really in love with myself. That's new
I like him and he oh sorry go ahead.. That's new. Uh, I like the, oh, sorry,
go ahead. No, no, you can go. I was just saying, it's funny that he's like, this season
romance, glamor drama. It's like, what show have you been watching? Looking to sound like
dynasty. Yeah. Where exactly was the glamor? Was that it like the buffet that was across
the street from the Tommy's hand original hamburgers at the finale was that yeah was that the white party with
a vegetable tray from Ralph's let me was that the like vaguely offensive
Jewish Muslim party they had for Halloween I think at the same location yeah
I don't take place in like like a three-block radius of the museum of death
and with us he's like I love that you keep saying museum of death
because I used to live on the same block as that I used to live on the other side of that block
and every time I would pass it I would be like Jesus why do I always have to pick somewhere like this to live on
I know and my Toyota dealership is across the street
because the
Anything like my Toyota dealership
exclusive access
Like a lot right there. It's like the museum of death and the cross street is seward and I'm like oh great I'm sorry
I think you might be thinking of the psychiatry is death museum by the sign of dollars. Okay, you're right
You're right the seward the museum of all of us. Okay, you're right. You're right.
That's a sewer.
The Museum of Death is at Gower across the street from both Tommy's original
hamburgers and Toyota of Hollywood and the shot of some season finale party.
Yeah, I'm thinking of the psychiatry as death museum.
You got to love Hollywood.
There's so much like a death museum surround here.
Yeah.
So many of the broken relationships too. Don't forget about how it would boulevard.
We got it all here in this city.
The most depressing museums ever.
And we also have LA also has the Museum of Tolerance, which is, I've never been to it, and it's
supposed to be like sort of holocausty and stuff, like, you know, look at the things,
or look at the crimes that humanity does onto each other.
We have to learn to talk, have more Tolerance as a society. But I just think any museum called the Museum of Tolerance
is just hilarious. You will tolerate this exhibit.
Well, yeah, I need to, I need that museum to learn to tolerate all the death museums
around. It's like Jesus Christ. I love that this town can celebrate success to this degree
and still have the fair nature to celebrate death and destruction and just complete failure as well.
And we do have like a Holocaust Museum here in LA. I feel like people don't seem to realize this,
but there's like a Holocaust Museum buried in the ground across you from the grove.
For real?
This puts you one after stopping it, American Girl.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, that should be part of the deal. Like, okay child, you're dragging me to American Girlplace.
Well guess what, after this we're going to that Holocaust Museum that's in the ground, the middle of that park.
Yeah, there is a museum there. You know another place with a lot of glass cases?
Holocaust Museum. Let's go everybody.
So Mike, let me see here, Farsi Farsi. So he asked Asa, how's the baby, awesome? She's like, babe, magical babe.
Like the baby's not here right now,
but he might come later for food right now.
Breastfeeding, it's a lot of work, by the way.
Yeah, that's a lot of work.
I'm like, okay, well thanks, but thanks for,
thanks for shutting light on that
as being the first mother in all humanity.
I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, rolls her eyes.
Like, you know what's hard work? Getting this brass mapped.
OK, bitch.
You want to come for me?
So then Andy is like, so who would like, who would you cast?
It was a very crap in male background.
He's like, who would you cast in a movie version of Shah as a sunset?
I'm like a movie version of Shah as a sunset.
Isn't that like Geostorm?
Oh, Peter Storm. Yeah.
And of course, Mike picks Rob DeNiro, which I felt just a Rob.
Don't say Rob DeNiro.
I, I was sorry, Robert DeNiro.
It's my short hand.
It's like when people say Nick Cage, I'm like, stop it.
You're not friends with them.
You can't go on Nick.
No, I went something friendly.
It's just my short hand.
But Robert DeNiro, which kind of makes me feel justified because
he has, I've been saying the whole season, like, what are you, the godfather?
He keeps crossing his arms and scrunching up and squinting his eyes like, this is what I
think.
I'm like, you are not a fucking goon.
Stop it.
Yeah, exactly.
Not a professional goon from like an actual good movie from the 60s and 70s. So Resa says that he would be Andy Garcia, which I kind of like appreciated that because
everyone else shows like major a-listers. He's like, I'd be Andy Garcia, which I there is
a resemblance, but it's kind of funny that he did not like just decide to, you know,
feed his ego and give himself someone like Joe Mangino or something, not that he's an
a-lister, but because then Gigi is like, I don't know, Angelina Jolie, which is...
Yeah, I don't see that.
Yeah, I'm not...
I don't know.
She's pretty in everything, but she's pretty, but she's like, definitely not Angelina
Jolie.
She's probably like a...
I don't know, maybe...
What's her name? Well... Well... I don't even, maybe... What's her name?
I don't even remember her name.
I'm just trying to think of one of the actresses from the Grinch that stole Christmas, because she has that little face from those stories, you know?
I was just scrunched up little face.
She reminds me of one of those
Starlets from the early 90s. There was like like a million of them they were all kind of the same
you know like the starlets from the 2000s and the starlets from the 80s and like the hilarious the thing that changes on the starlet is some is the haircut. I'm getting like a
valeria goleena vibe off of her like like someone who was like hot for a second and like wait
what happened to her. Oh and then sir is picks. He doesn't know the name, but he's like Cal Drogo from Game of Thrones.
I'm like, you're not. Listen. Well, the story of Cal Drogo is that he died early. He was really hot.
Literally just about to start the season. He's okay. It's not that big of a, well, I guess it is.
Okay, spoiler alert.
Rodiously can you win it.
No, it's okay.
This shows me on for like seven years.
I deserve to be spoiled.
Yeah, it's just first season spoiler.
But Cal Drogo basically gets sick and dies.
And then he's brought back to life by some first time.
Oh, you're really gonna, oh, you're really gonna spoil it.
But it's important.
It's important for the storyline.
First of all, he gets Colisey.
Like Colisey is training for something.
She's like a slave.
She's like his slave wife.
And then he just rapes her and rapes her and rapes her.
And finally, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,
I can't deal anymore, Ronnie,
because I thought you were just gonna say, oh, he died,
but you're now just fully telling stories of that.
Well, okay, I already said that.
So I'll just go up to that part till the die part.
And I'm not saying he's a rapist.
I'm just saying, sexually, like, doesn't treat women well.
And then she's like, I'm gonna teach him
that sex can be not rape.
And then it's like really romantic
because she teaches him how to make love.
Oh.
And then he dies.
And it's like, they finally changed him.
And so that's similar because like,
Shervin is like, you know, doesn't
treat women right or whatever. And then he's getting killed right now at this finale.
Basically, they're stabbing him through the heart. Right. And then I can't tell you what
happened after because I promised not to. Thank you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry to ruin your
analogy. I'm sorry to anybody who's watched Game of Thrones just continue that for me.
And compare it to the show. I'm sorry. I show in real life and see how smart I am by seeing
I know I know I'm sorry no it's true it's true spoilers aren't fair even for eight-year-old shows
Yeah, that's those you know because I really am gonna watch it. I really really am
Time I told people that Chloris Leechman ends up taking over the candy shop
and facts of life and people threaten murder me online.
Just kidding.
Well, you always, the thing is,
the spoilers just casually tumble out of you all the time.
That's why I always have to be like,
stop, stop what you're saying.
You're gonna spoil something.
Well, why does every goddamn show have to be
so twisty and turning that you can't ever talk about it?
I mean, it's killing the water cooler people. Well, I agree. Well, that's why we watch Bravo because
there's no spoilers to be had here. I'm except that Shervin thinks that he's Jason
Mamoa because they both have bureids and pecs. But let me tell you something. In my life,
I have met both Shervin and Jason Mamoa, and I can say that there is a distinct difference
between the two. A very, very distinct difference.
And her name is Lisa Bonay.
He wasn't with Lisa Bonay when I met him.
MJ calls herself Sam Mahayak.
Well, Reza calls her Sam Mahayak.
Oh, yeah.
Because she's trying to think of what.
And I think she was trying to figure out
which Sandra Bullock character she would be. And Re like some my ex she's like I'll take it.
I would have gone to Jimmy.
Which isn't even me.
I love Kathy no Jimmy.
Wait.
Of course.
You're fired.
Just kidding.
Oh my god.
They could have totally done soap dish.
Shaz soap dish.
If she was Kathy no Jimmy and Mike is Robert Downey Jr. because they both have painted on beards, you know, that would be perfect. And then Kathina Moriarty, that
could be GG. GG just has to get a blonde, a blonde just turn her hair blonde. She's very
Kathina Moriarty.
Well, as long as we're talking about Batman and Robin, just kidding. MJ adds that Tommy
could be Robin from that movie. They're like Batman and Robin. She. MJ adds that Tommy could be Robin from that movie.
They're like Batman and Robin?
She's like, yeah, Chris O'Donnell.
He's gotten that before.
What?
From who?
And was it with a sad tone in their voice?
They're like, Chris O'Donnell?
I feel like Tommy looks like that crazy thing in that Japanese movie, Spirit of the way.
The thing with the math, the big black thing with the math
that just always looks down like,
woo.
Oh.
Just looking up.
And we'll just look it up on the internet.
Look up the thing.
The monster in Spirit of the way.
You'll see, that's Tommy.
I think Tommy's the mist.
In a good way.
I love Tommy.
OK, so the first question is,
Reza, you look like a supermodel. How much weight have you lost? And he's like,
it's the last night plus 43 seconds, 42.97 xx0 ounces. Oh,
Z, it's like, okay, you're still in that mode. You're like, I was like five minutes ago.
Yeah, but rather than let Reza have a moment
of like happiness, they just fully put on a before and after photo
and there's like this some strange low angle shot
of Reza shirtless, he's like, mm, as before
and then after he's trying to be sexy,
he's like, can we please take that down, thank you.
I'm like, that's what the internet's been saying, Reza,
since you put it on Instagram.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
GG, did you put baby powder under your titties?
So now Andy asks a question that's always on his mind.
So raise your hand if you've had anything done,
any work done, anyone, anyone.
I'm like, okay.
Pretty much everybody except for MJ MJ who is the craziest looking
yes and uh Sherman's like my ghost raise your hand raise your hand did you understand the question
and she's like you have you just had a breast reduction I mean what the hell and she's like I
refuse to answer that because I find it offensive personally okay you know and I was like good
for you MJ even though you clearly have had a lot of
stuff done.
And they were like, well, you're always like half naked on, because she says she doesn't
like it when it opens herself up for people to making kind of her body or the ridicule
on social media.
And they're like, well, you pose half naked on social media all the time, which is true.
But you know what though, I like that someone was like, no, I'm not going to ask this stupid
question, answer this stupid question,
answer this stupid question, Andy.
Yeah, I do too.
And I like that also is trying to be petty like MJ.
Yeah, she's like, wait, listen, listen,
I haven't been able to speak off season babe.
Yeah, go, okay, yes, she were.
You just said babe the whole time.
Yeah, exactly.
She's like, are those lips natural, sweetie?
Because we know the same people from high school. And she like shut up get over it. Okay stop asking Menendez
She go to the gym to find out what her lips look like American in indez. She's like Eric Menendez babe
Do you remember that girl who wore bikini tops to geology class?
Where did you remember these lips?
Geology class
Really do remember these lips bid
But you know I mean us I mean you know it though But I kind of already was supporting us on this because basically also was saying listen
You've been coming at me all season long for not being transparent
You know for deciding there's certain things I want to keep private certain things I don't want to and you're doing the same thing
And MJ is like but it's my body. It's my body
and things I don't want to. And you're doing the same thing.
And MJ is like, but it's my body, it's my body.
So I both supported MJ,
because I don't think she has to share anything,
but I also supported Asa,
because I think she can share what she wants to share.
Well, also MJ is saying it's my body, it's my body.
So is pregnancy.
I'm having a baby.
Like that's the ultimate definition
of a woman choosing to do what she wants with her body.
You stupid.
That.
That.
Like stupid. Stupid.
Bitch. Listen, we're not afraid to go down to that jail. Also, I'm going to get even more
details about you from Eric Menendez. Okay. And Lyle too. Can we get a review of MTA
acting class, please, sir? Who is the other person who's interacting class again?
Um, I'm an end is and I forgot the other one. Yeah, it's been a week
so my I know so Mike is like so like this is very serious. I get Botox, you know
I wish I could get rid of my raccoon eyes, but I can't because I'm just so tired all the time and you know
Then GG starts to laugh and Mike's like hold on. I let you speak. Let me articulate my point to you
What what point could you possibly have to make about your
recognize? No kidding. He's already the yellowed everybody. And Gigi goes,
articulate it then. Yeah. Which is probably the first time Gigi's ever
said articulate. So I was like, we are making progress at least so far in the
exactly. So Mike is so the Mike is that he does that thing, which I hate,
because you know, we're close, he does awesome thing which I hate because You know where it closes does awesome powers like this little
Which I find to be one of the most obnoxious things that people can do it so kind of sending I'm mic doing it to Gigi
Got me really mad because it's like
Exactly it's like comes it's like loaded with all sorts of man splainy
And he goes I'm not Shalom, okay, and you just like what the fuck does that mean?
He's like because Shalom is my boy, but he's totally with byalom, okay? And she's just like, what the fuck does that mean? He's like, because Shalom is my boy,
but he's totally with you, okay?
Like, he's not, like, I'm not gonna be run over.
I won't let you build those me, like you build those Shalom.
And she's like, oh, like the way your wife did.
Yeah, your wife left you.
She's like, your wife left you.
I like that, I mean, I hate that.
He kept going, it's okay, honey.
It's okay, honey, okay.
Wow, it's so kind of something.
And also, like, and I think that there's something really
obnoxious about the fact that like, oh,
Shalom's my boy.
Like, I think it's, that's her ex or whatever it is,
but like your friends with Gigi first, actually.
So don't talk about family and then take Shalom side
in a stupid argument about raccoon eyes.
Especially when it took Shalom like five seconds
to go to sweet to abusive hell.
Exactly.
So, you know, a natural place to jump off
from raccoon eyes and a possibly abusive husband
is, hey, how's motherhood?
And she's like, oh, Andy is completely magical babe,
but babe, so hard, Andy, it's so hard.
And everybody just rolls their eyes.
And he goes, do you have any baby photos
and she goes, not on the air
because his father doesn't want him to be in public like that. And I respect my man. Okay.
Maybe soon on Insta at also sold 10 calf 10 teeny. I'm in water. I have to get permission.
Yeah. I mean, I actually respected that. I mean, it's, you know, it's a child. The father's like, I don't want the child on TV.
Well, why not just show the back of the head?
You know, like she does what you're made.
Just show us the back of this.
I would be okay with that.
I would be okay with that.
And Hanthay is almost as excited for also to be a starfucker as he is.
He's like, so has he played with Janet's baby yet?
Which the thought of Janet Jackson having a baby I mean you go girl but
How the hell did she do that Janet's in her 50s right?
Yeah, you know science you go jamming, you know, I love is listen Janet
She can do whatever she wants
Yeah, you go to everything that she does she brought us a music video then Tony as a father junior and
She does. She brought us a music video then Tony Osapato, Jr. and
Jiamon Honsu. And for those so gay and 500 pounds, she don't care.
She's like, I'm not working. I'll gain 500 pounds, go on public, and then I'll lose it all in five minutes to do another tour. Thank you.
You know that, you know that Justin Timberlake is headlining the Super Bowl this year.
And everyone's like, Oh, so they he better bring John Jackson out because,
you know
Her career got ruined by that stupid thing nipple gate and he got off like Scott free when he was when he tore the thing off
Yeah, it's not funny. You think America cared
America that we were upset recently, you know
I was taking a shit at that time. I'm so upset. I was taking a shit is half time and then I hear everyone go
Oh, I said what happened luckily I have Tivo so like I went you know when I was taking a shit is half time and then I heard I'm going, oh! I was like, what happened? Luckily I have Tivo, so like I went, you know, when I was done,
I like went out and I was like, oh my God,
but like I was so sad that I didn't get to like,
I didn't know that you missed that moment too.
I was watching you with my friend Carrie
and we were outside smoking a cigarette just listening.
We missed it too.
We didn't know until we started hearing about it,
you know, 10 minutes later.
And I saw it like, I saw it like, two minutes after the fact.
But I was like, I wasn't there with everyone else
when I was like, oh, you know, I wasn't like,
it wasn't live for me.
And I remember when it happened, I wasn't even like so.
I was just like, I thought it was fake.
So I was like, oh, okay.
But I actually, I don't believe Janet Jackson,
if I may digress for a one moment,
I never believe that Janet Jackson did that on purpose.
I don't think that she's not that type.
She's not in terms of like,
I see her as someone who's very guarded and like very shy,
and I don't think she would be like,
oh yeah, let me just show my two-tea to the world.
I believe the explanation, which was that,
the top, it was supposed to be that there was like a layer of like red like red under
Claw that whatever and Justin Blake was supposed to pull the top layer the black one
I suppose to reveal like red thing
But he pulled both of them and he pulled the whole thing off which was him leave it up to timber like to ruin something like that
But also I'm with you because I feel like Janet Jackson has self-respect which look there's evidence right here
She won't let her baby hang out with Asa. So I mean, that's pretty good sign
She's like this hard to get my credibility back
Yeah, she's like do not let us into this hospital room
Okay, you know, also was out there like
I'll say into this hospital room. So the, you know, also was out there like,
she was like, oh, was a big, she made,
she's just, cause I was like, oh,
she's such a beautiful baby.
So beautiful.
Like, have you met the baby?
No, no, that I saw him through the window
when he was in that little breathalyzer.
Like, okay, awesome.
So now the question is, did I also complain too much
for inter-pregnancy?
Um, and so, um, so Mike, Mike weighs in and he's like, you know what? Like we went to Israel and
you know, she was a trooper, you know, seven months pregnant, she was a trooper. But then
family members of hers reach out to me to say that we weren't like being loving enough,
et cetera. And that's when this starts to open up this whole can of worms about the race
comments.
So yeah, I'm completely
completely on Asa side. I thought that was interesting for him to say. I still
think it's disgusting for him to say and I hate that they edited everything to
make it look like they were actually being nice. Yeah, I so here's here my
feelings. I would say I'm like 95% on Asa side. I don't think that Mike is I
feel like I understand somewhat of what Mike was trying to say.
You know, I think that basically, you know, for Mike, I understand that Mike was saying
like basically like, whoa, like Persians don't like black people.
I think that's what he was basically trying.
He's trying to acknowledge it and be like, this could be a teachable moment, et cetera,
right? But really his inability to understand how even just seeing like his reaction, it just,
it exacerbates the situation.
You know where, when, when Asa says, you know, hey, we're all up here and we're all in a
biracial relationship and yet mine's the only one that gets called out for it and like I'm the one supposed to be doing a teachable moment. It's like that, you know, she basically
is saying it's casual racism. I don't know whether you call it casual racism or bias or not whatever it is,
what she's basically saying and I'm saying this by the way because I empathize with Asa because I'm
in an interracial relationship with a black man and I know one of the things that is, you know, that I've learned from my boyfriend and a lot of his black friends is that like, it really sucks to be the like where you're like, the color of your skin is like, is highlighted constantly, you know, where you just want to be talking to someone and you
don't want to, like, you don't always want to be like, oh, like, you don't want it to,
like, constantly have to be reminded that you're, you're like, you know, you look different
than like a whole bunch of white people, you know? I don't know if I'm saying this as
articulate.
No, no, that makes sense.
I mean, even on the Bachelorette, she was with the guy she ended up picking uh... one point during like the finale dates or whatever the hometown
visits and stuff she got actually scared she was like is your family gonna be
okay with this and it sucks
you know
because it is more about the color of your skin than a cultural thing like if
i was dating a servant or somebody like that
it'd be like oh person what's that like it wouldn't be like
brown you know?
Yeah, and I think, and I don't think them,
I actually, I don't think Mike is racist,
but what he doesn't realize is that in his attempt
to try to like have a conversation about it,
what he is doing though is he's really,
in his mind, he's trying to do something good,
but what he's really doing is it's just underscoring it all over again. I don't think he was trying to do something good but what he's really doing is it's just
underscoring it all over again.
I don't think he was trying to be good.
I think he was trying to be a little bitch because they did it that they did it in public.
He did it after shit talking with MJ.
Then he continued to shit talk with MJ.
I mean, he's bad nature.
It's like a reza aimed those two and they did whatever he wanted while he just sat there
and acted all innocent.
Yeah. Well, what got me mad is that, mad is that he was sitting there with the reunions saying, he's
like, I'm just trying to do something good, I'm trying to have a conversation and you
turned it around to make it me seem like a racist.
And I was like, actually Mike, you're the one who turned it around because you're the
one who suddenly decided, oh, this has to be, this is Ossas' moment to teach the world about, you know,
how interracial relations, and like, you just put it on her.
So you actually turned the whole situation around on her,
and now she's the bad guy,
because you didn't wanna like turn it into a thing.
So you're the one who turned it around.
Yeah, and then of course Mike comes up
with his more turning aroundiness,
and he's like, I respect your main, okay?
Like I walk up to the second floor,
my gym just to say hi to him, okay?
How much is this?
How much is this?
Yeah, just to say hi.
And then she goes on social media,
rants about me and she goes,
look, I'm not gonna judge you, I don't judge you,
I just let people see you and they can judge you, okay?
Like a retweet is not a judgment, okay?
It's just supporting someone else's judgment, babe.
And then she's like, and you made your girlfriend convert and then you cheated on her ass. So fuck you.
Yeah, that was great. But then also came back with another ignorant thing because she's like,
my best friend is black, babe. So I understand black issues.
Oh, good. Which is sort of, I guess, what I just said. But I mean, but I mean,
Oh, but you're talking about a relationship.
It's just like whenever somebody says anything racist and that's always like the thing.
It's like, I have a black friend.
Well, it's not, I think it's not so much that I understand it more than anyone else.
It's just that I feel like I've learned.
I've learned, and it's obviously this is not what, like every single black person feels
this way.
It's just I've learned from like, you know,
a lot of the black people that I've met
and had conversations with that it's just like,
sometimes you just wanna live your life
and you don't want like the color of your skin
to be like the focus of every single conversation, you know?
And that's why I, and that's why I got met.
That's why I also says, how dare you bring up
that germane is black?
And then Andy was like, well, what's wrong with saying
he's black? I mean, he's black. And I was just like, because we don't up that germane is black. And then Andy was like, well, what's wrong with saying he's black?
I mean, he's black.
And Austin's like, because we don't mention
that everyone else is white.
And that's true.
And so he's like Jackson first.
It's OK.
He's a Jackson first.
So Austin keeps saying that Mike is casually racist,
which is driving him nuts.
But he doesn't seem to realize him bringing up this whole thing.
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Perhaps speaks to a larger issue. Maybe there's like casual racism in the person community
or at least in his community, and that's what he doesn't seem to understand, and that's
why she's getting mad, you know.
Yeah, um, why else would it get list?
Why else would it get list?
I mean, I have to highlight it.
Yeah, I think he was just being a racist asshole personally at the time, and then he'd
like try to dial it back, but he doesn't see it as racism because he's saying basically in the community,
they don't like it when you marry a black person, okay, period. So maybe that's there,
but he's just an asshole about it and he did it in a really,
a really fight incendiary way. He's claiming that,'s like when he says it's a big deal for a
person to like be with a black guy that's basically saying like persons don't you know don't
improve with black guys and he's he was saying he was saying talk about like this is your
moment to show that it's like a great thing it's wonderful and interracial as you best
at both worlds and just like a culture's come learn from each other yada yada.
That's her story bit. No no that's hers. Exactly but he's he's saying this and the fact and interracial as the best of both worlds and those like cultures can learn from each other, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all,
y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all,
y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all,
y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all,
y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all,
y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all,
y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all,
y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all,
y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all,
y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, yall, y'all,
y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, yall, y'all,
y'all, yall, y'all, yall, yall, y'all, y'all, y'all, you believe his intentions really were pure and that it wasn't coming from an nasty place, it's condescending.
She's had this opportunity for several years, you know?
And she's sad and decides she doesn't wanna make it a thing.
She doesn't like, like, why my racial issue it is,
like for this season, like this scene,
this, they're basically what they're doing
is trying to force Asa into bringing her personal dramas
onto the show.
And they say it a million times,
and they keep trying to bait her into it.
And why won't you share anything with your friends?
Why would she share anything with Mike or fucking MJ?
Why?
Like, what have they ever done?
But, shit on her.
Exactly.
She would share that.
You know, it's stupid.
So then this huge question comes up.
I mean, it was bigger than the racism thing.
I look, they showed a close-up of the food,
because you know, of course, it's like a buffet on the table.
And I was like, who just eats,
who just puts out full cucumbers?
It's like, is this a table of animals?
Like, who's gonna eat a full cucumber off a tray
of cucumbers?
And then later they show, and J standing backstage
just jumping into a full cucumber.
And I was like, oh, Yeah, okay. That was answered. So yeah, so then it goes to, hey
Gigi, why is it that when Resa said fuck Iran? Why that upset you so much? So she's
like, well, it's a country I go to every year. It's my country, it's my people, all
that stuff. So Resa's like, like listen Iran is a terrorist country and they killed gays
They hate me. They wouldn't want me alive. They killed me. It's terrible. So yeah, I say fuck you now sure
And gets all mad. He's like well
Bro like why would you lumbit all together as a as a country? I mean
I was there's a lot like a like the country that people and so resas like I mean the government you think I meant the kindergarteners
Well, yeah, I mean didn't you just say the kindergartners are gonna have a gun problem?
You idiot because they sell toy guns on the street the reandals and then Shervin's like well
They're KKK people like in the south and you know you don't say you hate it
You know you hate America and she was like well if the KKK people were in power then yeah
I would say I hate America America but they're not in power
I would like to change my state and it to respect I should have said fuck the Islamic Republic and us is like a babe
You get that that's totally different right babe. Okay, then
Like you this is trying to make it self seem so deep by going from racism to more racism
Yeah, and you're just still as ignorant as you were before all of you This is how it's trying to make itself seem so deep, by going from racism to more racism.
And you're just still as ignorant as you were before, all of you. Yeah.
And then it was like, hey, were there any shenanigans, shenanigans?
And they're like, well, this one time, when we in Yeesville, a chef got mad at us.
And we see this like unseen footage of a chef just screaming everyone like,
get out, like, no, no, no no I won't be made a fool of
We are not chumps here. We are not chumps here. You have put everything in your own pocket And he probably meant the bread baskets. Yeah, because you know they that you know that that crew just steals everything off the damn table and puts it in their pocket
It's like your grandma's a wedding like the flower bases in the back of her car once you think a nobody looking
Yeah, exactly. It turns out that the chef when he asked for the money,
the producer said no problem, but the chef only heard no and there was like
la la la la la la. He heard no and problem.
And then he saw my approach and said, uh-oh,
these people are stealing things. Oh gosh gosh. So then they start talking about when I gave them cameras and set them loose.
And Ress is like, that was a Muslim ghetto.
Okay.
That's it.
Muslim ghetto.
And then we were forced to ask them all these offensive questions.
I was like, you guys weren't forced to just go up and act like that.
You know, we're walking up to Randas going,
Jewish, Muslim, Jewish, Muslim, Muslim, Jewish.
Yeah, you could have also just not done the assignment
and just gone to a shop and had some food.
Oh, so you can't expect to put one of your friends
in a Carmen San Diego detective hat,
or like the McAfee spy virus hat, the destiny was wearing,
and not have people think that they're being questioned by detectives.
Yeah, exactly. I think you're just being very close minded.
Well, no, because you are often a castle dancing with these random was castel privilege. She was in the castle of when else wasn't
Castle privilege. Yeah, you guys do this while I speak to nice people and dance in a circle, okay?
Yeah, exactly people who knew I was coming or whatever
So then resa resa started talking about they're talking about the Western wall, and what was life for Reza. And I cut this one. I was like, I thought he was gonna cry. I thought
he was getting ready, but like, did I bring to the Western wall with music about? But he,
he bases like, first donor, I gave her a piece too. He's like, well, you know, I wanted to hear
from my great, from my grandfather. I went on the Hollywood medium, and the only, I wanted to hear from my great- I'm from my grandfather. I went on the Hollywood medium,
and the only person I wanted to connect with
was my Jewish grandfather.
And the only thing I wanted to know
was if you'd be proud of me, if you were in love.
Like, well, no, he probably would not be.
I got to Macauley cooking, being like-
Did you ever feel home alone?
Your grandpa knows.
And he says, congratulations on your weight.
What is that?
Wedding?
He's wearing a wedding ring, McCoyly.
Yeah, like great, great psychic abilities.
I'm sensing there is a grandfather,
and there's a wedding.
He says congratulations on the wedding.
Yes, those are three very obvious concepts
that there's a grandfather somewhere in this person's life
that there was a wedding somewhere in this person's life.
And that someone would want to say congratulations
about the wedding.
I'm sensing a stinging feeling on your back.
Is it wax?
It's wax?
Oh my God, I waxed my back!
Shocker, great one, McCully.
So Resa was like, I then I went up to the wall
and I put my nose and my lips have begins to,
and I felt like, literally I felt like I was being embraced.
I'm like, yeah, it's probably a security guard.
I'm being like, please do not desecrate this wall.
So, uh, then it goes to GG.
Because, um, oh, I, oh, now I see what I wrote. I wrote, I wrote, McColley says, um, I fear, I sense that these hot dogs are feeling a great amount of fear that are on the table on those things see
But so Mike's basically it goes to Gigi because she was like break it down or whatever
So Mike's like be careful be careful honey be careful what you say right here because I'm stood up for you about breaking the wall
Okay, and she's like why wouldn't I want to break that barrier? It's like between a temple and
What was that there was a mosque a mosque? Yeah, she's like between a temple and what was that? What's a mosque? A mosque? Yeah, she's like,
of course, I wanted to break it down because it's a protection barrier. It's the same reason I don't
allow condoms. Yeah. GG is under the impression that the wall separated the Muslims side of the city,
from the Jewish side of the city. And that's why she wanted to tear it down. I'm like, could you
maybe next time read a brochure?
There's like so much literature.
I mean, I'm sure there were signs educating people
about what the hell the Western wall is.
Maybe go into Wikipedia before you just start getting mad
at something.
Yeah, because by the way, she still hasn't learned.
She still doesn't know.
And she's like, yeah, well, when I stepped into your country,
they called me G-Hot.
And he's like, OK, you know, look,
there's an idiot in every country. And she He's like he followed me to the bathroom. I can probably thought you had coke
Well fine, well we're engaged now so
Yeah, so so then next up is
So, so then next up is the only. Oh my God, the only positive part to this entire reunion.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought.
Yeah, he would have thought. Yeah, he would have thought. Yeah, he would have thought. Yeah, he would have thought. Yeah, he would have thought. was the winter of my dad's life, like we could at least live down the hall in this time
of need.
Yeah.
I was like, okay.
I was expecting to be like much more insendiery than that, but it wasn't.
So then talking about the painting party and the craziness of that drunken fight when
Tommy was crying, et cetera.
And MJ was like, yeah, I basically was panicking.
I was in baby panic and I was being totally irrational.
And, you know, I'm sorry to Tommy.
And, you know, it was good.
It was good for me to see that and have a throne in my face
because, basically, I think like a ridiculous bit.
Asshole, true.
Yeah.
It's like yelling from our couches.
I like when Andy told her, you know, MJ,
we saw lots of drink in this year.
Was it because of your dad's illness?
Okay, sure, Andy, sure.
So what was it last year or the year before?
Or the year before?
Does it need to excuse every time?
What the girl just be a drunk if she wants to be a drunk?
Why don't we have to do it in a minute, brothers?
Yeah, but I like that she copped to that too.
It was like, I was addicted to Tommy. And Tommy's like, yeah, but now like that she cop to that too was like I was addicted to Tommy and Tommy's like yeah, but now I want kids
I can't wait she's done nothing but show me she loves me. Yeah, she's even putting up with my hard candy finish in the middle of the night
So yeah, Tommy is ready to have a baby right away. He's he's ready now
I guess they're living sort of healthier now and so then Andy's like and what about you Vita?
Are you ready big grandmother and they show like last year Vita goes no so but this year Vita goes
I'm not
You can see Vita. She's like I should answer this in a way. They want to be mean to me on the tweets
She's like, I should answer this in a way they want to be mean to me on the tweets. Yeah.
But, no, like she has to still be honest.
Yeah, she's like, you know, anyone see, anyone see beautiful baby.
We sponsor BET 247 with sponsor beauty, I'm yeah.
It's heartbreaking that I'm the only child with a mom who's still discouraging me.
You're walking around in one suit, spandex outfits, having your face rearranged
and your tits rearranged and everything done.
You're an alcoholic.
Like, it's not discouraging you.
It's just trying to encourage the world.
You know what I mean?
Like, you can't just talk about it.
It's also a word of a view reproducing
is actually probably one of the sweetest things
you could do for this world.
So thank you, Viva.
Yeah.
So then MJ starts saying how Vita wasn't around in her childhood,
because there's some questions about like,
is Vita projecting something from her youth and did it, did it.
And so MJ was,
starts saying how Vita wasn't around in her childhood.
And Vita's like,
it was there, but MJ chose to live with her dad.
And that was only 20 minutes.
I didn't go to other country.
I was 20 minutes away.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So fuck off.
She chose to live with her dad. And then Vita's like,
hmm, Andy said, were you ready when you had a M.J.? And she's like, hmm, I didn't
plan it. And Russ is like, this is brutal dude. Yeah, they're of course trying to make MJ cry.
Like, wow, that was so harsh. Why does so mean? Next time you're supposed to say it was unplanned. It was a giant mistake and I regret it forever, but it turned out to be a blessing
Yeah, he's like you're supposed to end it with icing. She's like, what is this cake?
Reset. Yeah, you know, Vita is like like you know, Vita's totally unfazed by what Res is saying because you know how many times Vita probably told MJ
growing up, you were a mistake.
I didn't even want you.
Like this is not news to MJ.
Yeah, but also, you know what,
she could have thrown herself down the stairs and she didn't.
So let's just all, let's just all,
all right.
Thank Vita, okay.
So Raza's like, oh no, he says,
how do you think of Tommy now?
And she's like, since last year, I get to know Tommy better and they start to like him and they're like what?
Everybody freaks out. Yeah, he's like he always fix exotic food for me exotic food like ribs
We walk our dogs together
Food like ribs. Yeah exotic broccoli
English muffin
French fries
They're from France
Jesus of America
I like her better than MJ. She's hilarious
If you don't marry him. I'm marrying him. I need a
I mean that sweet. I mean Vita not only loves Tommy so much now
For MJ, but she loves them enough to get over her own issues with
Relationships you guys hugs. Yeah, whoever thought Vita would bring the most positive moments to her shots reunion
Well Vita operations like any of the cast members do bring her food and she will be happy
Yes like any of the cast members do, bring her food and she will be happy. Yes.
He's more mature, more relaxed, and full of more ribs.
For that, I like him.
Those exotic ribs.
So she picked him as the most improved.
Mike.
Yeah.
She picked Mike as the most improved.
Oh, oh, oh.
Mike.
How did Mike improve?
Well, his skin looks better.
OK, yeah. his plugs look good.
Yeah.
And he's like, who's the least improved?
Who's the worst?
And she's like,
I saw.
And also it's like, surprise, surprise.
Yeah.
Yeah, she basically says,
she goes, she's the most ungrateful person.
You, she came to this country with one suitcase.
And now she has everything,
and she owes that to the show.
And yet she's not watching show, Andy. She's that to the show and yet she's not watching show Andy. She's mad because I said she's not watching the show. Yeah.
Got a little bit. Yeah. And she's like she if they express their opinion, she calls this one
negative, this one jealous, this one sexes, this one racist, I'm like, well, she's not wrong.
I hit one hit one that she was wrong on okay
yeah it's like it's all about promoting herself look don't be mad that that your daughter
hasn't come up with a bright idea to actually be selling something on TV like every other
brabo star ever yeah that's my awesome faults yeah exactly exactly what would MJ sell
girl you know it would be some spandex seats. Do it. I mean, you can see you was selling extensions. Yeah, and
Also just gives this huge yawn in response because you can't yell at another mother and
Then she leaves and he's like, okay, well, we're not gonna get us to yell at you unfortunately
so get the fuck out and us
House that goes immediately when she thinks the cameras are off she, so you could like bringing her to shit on me every time, huh?
And Andy goes, actually, she usually shit some Mercedes.
Did she just hear? She called her a fucking mistake.
Said that.
So the next segment, Destiny arrives and Andy's like, well, Destiny,
you were originally on the People's couch and they show a clip of the People's Couch
where she's watching Mike and Mike is talking about like how like what marriage is hard or whatever it was
and she's like, well maybe you should have thought about that before you put your penis in a vagina
and then it comes back and everyone's laughing at Mike is just growling.
I'm Mike is so pissed and then they're like, everybody thinks destiny and Mike belong together.
Who thinks that?
Who has ever said that?
Who?
I don't think a single person has ever thought that.
I don't think anyone's even put that much energy into that.
Like dreaming of destiny and Mike and their forever romance.
Yeah, no one ever even thought that was a possibility or a good idea, but nice job at
trying to make it seem like Destiny was doing something on this show.
I know, I was feeling bad for Destiny because she's like, it's hard to believe, you know,
18 months ago, I was watching them on TV and now look where I am.
Like, you've actually downgraded from the people's couch.
I know, and I like that they were making it seem like it was the 10th anniversary of
cheers.
Like, I was like last year, people. I know and I like that they were making it seem like it was the 10th anniversary of cheers
This was like last year of people they're like remember way back then when you are the people's cats
So we're everyone knows your captain. Yeah, they're like look. It's like a regular moon lighting remember when you went costume shopping and
they showed him
Something talking about his dick or whatever
He's like I want to buy you a dick mask for Halloween. He's like, I'm trying to convince him.
I want to buy you a dick mask for Halloween.
And he's like, why you want to suck it?
Huh?
If you don't want to suck it, then don't talk about it.
Like, yeah, it's real.
Yeah.
It's like, simple shepherd and Bruce Willis running an agency together.
Yeah, exactly.
Dual lighting.
Well, I have some hope for Destiny for next year, but this year, ma'am. Yeah, good luck with your Royal Bar.
She was fine. I'll take her over Asifa and Bob. Well, they kind of kept with Destiny going after
Shervin in this next segment, which I was like, okay, Destiny, I got it to reunion.
Yeah, and you really want to be on season two, and I think you should be on season two.
I love watching the be on season two.
I love watching the one.
Season two of the Destiny show.
Yes.
Yes.
But come on now.
You don't need to come this hard at a reunion where you did nothing because the question
was to serve.
Why did you think your friend's data germinogamy and he's like, well, there's like a thread
belt like not lighting your own business in this group.
We love the other side of the world.
It's not going gonna open relationship.
Yeah.
So he's got his, you know, running for mayor excuse down.
Exactly.
I mean, like.
It's open.
It's open.
I like, yeah, and I like his thing.
Like, yeah, there's, you know,
there's like this thing in this group
where like everyone like butts into each other's business.
I'm like, you're on a reality show.
It's what your job,
you're literally your job is to butt into each other's business and
your friends in Resa.
He or friends in Resa.
You don't have to be on this show if you don't want to be.
Yes.
So Andy Gus does, and Alisa, that you're in an open relationship and he's like, she does.
And then everyone starts laughing.
And she goes, you stood in front of us and said, you're in a relationship.
And he's like, I said exclusive.
I was exclusive.
I mean, I lied.
I'm sorry, I lied.
I own it.
I own it.
I just, you know, I'm a lease.
She, like, I would have, I'm fine with the open relationship, but I'm a lease.
She's not.
So I didn't want to, I didn't want to bear it, because I'm still a gentleman at the
other day.
So I lied only to the people.
I just did the other terminology.
Like, she thought I was saying,
are you into an open house?
You know, like, yeah.
So she just kept taking me to open houses
and I was like, what the hell?
But turns out, you know, she just misunderstood me
the first time.
Yeah, I was like, oh, I said,
do you want to open up our relationship
to like lots of exciting things?
And she said, yes.
And so I thought that man we had an open relationship.
But she thought it was just like,
we're opening a door and I'm going to walk through it sometimes. Yeah, she thought I was saying are you into open source and she was like yeah
Which is also why I just openly gave her STDs. Yeah, here's that I was misunderstanding. Yeah
Yeah, I bet I bet my bad my bad my bad
I lied I lied and I'm lying with a lot my bad
This is when destiny comes back in again. She's like I was his number one fan
I told everyone he was dope and
Then I asked one question and hit a nerve and you decided to be a big man. It come at me. Okay, man
Let's stop that. Let's stop making it sound like you got beat in that. Yeah, you guys hardly had a fight
It wasn't this was not a we've seen fights in the
shots this is in being like what else what else do you want to know like why
I asked me so many questions about my obviously open relationship could you please
stop I'm trying to paint this wall right now okay she's trying to cry she's
like it was so bad it was so disrespectful that son of a
pin I just had to lower a lampshade onto my head and grind private.
And then they show it and she's just standing there with her arms crossed with a
dick drawn behind her head on the wall. So Sherman's all excited because he has
a little stun move. He's like, well, if you have any questions, I got an iPad
here and we can ask Adelise if she's ready on FaceTime on an Australia. She's been up
for about 36 hours waiting for this moment. One one last shot for Annelise.
So they're all like, yeah, okay, fine. And MJ just gets up. She's like, this is too ridiculous. Even for me, I'm going to eat a cucumber whole, you know. Yeah, she's like, it's a good time to
take a shot. So then Annelise comes on to this on to FaceTime. She's like, hello, I'm here. I just
got my lip stung by about five different bays. I got my emergency lip stone in case the Titanic kits.
And they're like, there's enough room for Kathy Bates
and the entire orchestra.
So he's like, are you dating?
And she basically says, do you have an open relationship?
And she's like, well, look, it's Aesonine for me to expect him.
When I'm here and he's there
for him to be monogamous. I just don't want to hear about it. And Andy's like, well are you
dating other people and she's like, no, but I could. The question is, have I steamed broccoli
for others Andy? Is there but you want to know? Because I've considered it.
Who hears time to date when you're listening to old in-excess albums, they are a great Australian band.
Oh, so I'll come from the land down under.
She said, you can't cheat on someone when they're not in an exclusive relationship.
And Gigi throws her head back and she's like, they said the exact same word.
You just got in a list.
Did you get rented? No, you got.
You see what I mean?
You see what I mean about the open house like serious.
You get something like that.
So MJ comes back and and he's like, oh, you just couldn't be
around that or her was there like.
I was trying to think about to you by dipping sauce.
What do you crush?
That's like a garlic.
The garlic deep fries in it.
Garlic garlic.
Garlic. Garlic. You know, it's like a sauce.
Like a garlic.
Yeah, it's like where was there no a
ole left for the fries.
Sure. Like, oh, I only she's one of the
girls I was dating also.
She's great, but she does really
love the relationship here. I can get it on the face time also. Yeah, She's great, but she does have a good relationship.
Here, I can get her on the first time also.
Yeah, it's just Analy's and a Monical.
Hello, I'm A.O. Lee.
Hello, A.O. Lee has made you some streamed broccoli.
You know that?
I'm here to report that it would be Tadley Acerline if I, I only got mad at
Shevin for dating someone else, especially someone as beautiful and as lovely and wonderful
as that other girl in a lease.
So, Andy's like, well, what's wrong, what's wrong, MJ? And she's like, it's so silly, it's
so rehearsed. And she's like, scripted and she goes, no, no,
I'm not saying it's scripted.
It's just like, I get that it's uncomfortable for you,
serving and it's hard and it's like, yeah,
it's like uncomfortable.
She goes, yeah, it is.
It's hard to show your real life on camera.
I get it because that's like her huge disc, you know?
Yeah, I'm just gonna share my life and you don't.
No, you don't.
What the fuck do you share?
M. J. Dating Tommy and your mom being mean to you. Do you know how many lie?
Do you know how many things you don't share on this show and you know that they all keep each other secrets because
This group has to be a thousand times more disgusting than they pretend to be on TV
But wait that might be a good time to bring up or maybe plug. I'm assuming we'll talk about our first episode
We're just hanging out with MJ on Thursday?
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Ah, like I'm no hypocrite, okay?
I say hello.
That's it.
Oh, that's very weird.
I'd ice to meet you and walk away.
Also, I had to look how much stuff she took
in her FabFit fun box, which was like five times the allowed
limit.
Do you need a bigger bag?
Well, we will talk about this on the bonus episode.
That's just the way, that's my way of playing the fact that I'm running out of adventure.
We're going to talk about it on the bonus episode.
I'm going to be some fake bitch.
I just said hi.
I'm Ronnie.
Nice to meet you, really.
Actually, I will be a fake bitch for a moment.
I feel like we didn't mention the fact that while so many people looked ridiculous, I actually thought MJ looked really great this reunion.
I like her real life. She didn't real life too.
She's really tiny. She's teeny tiny.
Yeah, well good for her. Well, you know, I think our buddies Brandon and Craig have been, you know, getting her life together. I think Craig has been training her. I think Brandon did her hair and makeup. So, you know, yeah, she's really pretty, she's really nice.
And usually on this, so I actually like her.
I'm just anti on this reunion because I hate how they all acted this year.
I was just really gross even for this show.
Yeah.
So luckily, they've, luckily we, we see a really nice side of them in the next segment
where they all debate the merits of a says baby being a bastard.
Just in case you just in case the show couldn't get any lower.
Let's go to the bastard segment.
Well, we pretty much ruined everybody so far. Let's go back to awesome.
Yeah, awesome.
And they show all the clips of the bastard bastard MJ saying bastard bastard.
And she goes, well, look, okay, child out of wedlock.
Sorry, that better. And he he's like that is an acceptable
sure then and also goes she's a file she's disgusting and the
thing goes I didn't even have venom behind it
I don't I don't even know how she could keep saying bastard child well okay
maybe if you truly didn't know maybe if you really thought it was a normal saying,
I am brought back to freshman year of college.
I was in a class.
It was mainly upperclassmen, mainly like seniors,
and I was like a freshman,
and for some reason we were discussing fertility,
and we're talking about female reproductive fertility issues,
and I raised my hand, and my big comment was,
well listen, if you're barren, you're barren.
It never won.
Gasped.
I mean, this is like 70 people.
Because I thought barren wasn't actual just term.
I didn't realize it was like saying bastard.
I didn't realize it was like a pejorative.
And the professor was like, wejorative and the professor was like
We don't use the word Baron. I was like really and everyone then started laughing at me
Which I deserved and I learned the hard way that you don't like you know, you don't say Baron You don't say Baron at least not in that context. So it's like bastard. Maybe maybe there's a chance that she thought bastard was actually
In the official term no the difference is that MJ is like 47 years old
And I was 20 I was not even 20. I was 18. So there is a difference. So never mind. I take it all back
First of all Baron is not on the same level as back. No, of course not
I'm just saying it's an example of like it, but it's not on the same level
But if you sold a woman that you're Baron
That's offensive to her. I guess it could be yeah,, it could be used like just a totally weapony way,
but yeah, although it's not hilarious, it's hilarious.
And they explained to MJ what a bastard actually was.
Yes.
Exactly.
And then they even have the argument over, wait, does it mean
you're a bastard if you weren't married
when your parents weren't married when you were conceived
or were they actually had you?
Because that was, she's like, well, I'll get pregnant and then I'll get married.
And then my baby won't be a bastard.
But then she said bastard or a million times and she's just, she was being a bit and
she was.
And her like, it's not 1633 anymore.
People don't say bastard.
Yeah.
And she was being mean on purpose.
And then she says, well, I'm sorry, but it's really hard when you're not an image-crafter and you actually share your own life. I'm like, okay. So basically,
you're saying you get a pass because you were just being honest. When you said bastard,
8,000 times, like that's not really better. It would have been funny if Osso then said,
well, listen, I'm sorry that you're barren. Because then it would have just been like the
petty, the petty feud. The petty gop.
Well, also, also, it did say, well, look, Eversa, you know, if there was a derogatory term
for two gay guys having a baby, I wouldn't just sit there eating my hummus, okay?
I expected you to do the right thing and stand up for me.
And he's like, I can't control how she feels about her own process.
It's about, she was saying, she didn't want a bastard, baby.
Not that you didn't, you shouldn't have a bastard, baby.
Like now that is not true.
A, and you know it.
And it's bullshit and she goes, oh, I'm not talking about that.
I'm talking about in the moment,
while she was sitting there saying that,
why don't you say anything?
And then resists like,
well, as you mentioned, there was hummus.
Hummus made with with Dead Sea salt. I couldn't think of anything else.
What else do you want me to do? There was hummus. Delicious, delicious hummus. It was like sabra, but better.
So his, he starts tap dancing. He's like, this is the one thing I wanted to talk about at the Dead Sea. You told people
something that you made me block from them and about the eggs being frozen. And I'd never said
anyone, anything to anyone for one year for you. And then you sat there and regurgitated what
you had done. First of all, regurgitated what she had done. What? And you wouldn't let me speak
on it. Okay. So it's her fault because you kept a secret that she ended up opening up about yeah that was it was there the
amount of you open up about it for her while you're still mad that she's keeping secrets
the amount of bullshit yeah the amount of bullshit here was off the charts I mean Reza
you've made yourself a victim metal on a things but don't make yourself a victim because
you held on to a secret And then she decided that you know
This was the time that she was ready to share it with the rest of the people and how dare you like just drag her over the
Coles all season long all reunion long like you don't share you don't share and now she decides
You know, I'm gonna share something and this is what she gets well
I mean I was in shock because you entrusted to me and to me only and that's hard.
And then I was like, I was floored.
He was the one thing, what am I going to say next?
What should I say?
What do I do?
I was helpless.
Next time, Asa, stop sharing.
Yeah, exactly.
Don't want to ask.
Yeah.
So, yeah, I'm just skipping over a lot of this.
Well, this is why, so basically, because he's standing up and it's kind of like, well,
what does this have to do with all this bastard talk?
And he's like, nothing, but you know that you got Reza when he stands up and starts yelling
about nothing.
So he couldn't defend.
He couldn't, he basically, he's saying he couldn't, he couldn't defend Asa, and he couldn't tell Mercedes to stop saying using the word bastard because he was just
so shocked that Asa would just casually answer a short of his question like that. And Asa goes,
what, how do you know it was casually? And she's right, just because she was calm does not mean it was casual. She was like in her mind
she's like, okay, I'm I mean these people want me to open up
I'm opening up I'm gonna do this right now and I just thought that was such a ridiculous display by a reza getting on his feet and somehow
like his only excuse for you know for not
For not saying stop using the word bastard because it's rude it was
I think stop using the word bastard because it's rude. It was because he's taking them on.
He was taking them on the whole time to keep
him from running awesome about it.
So he says he's a total asshole.
OK, everybody who watches this show knows he's a total asshole.
And instead of ever being called out for it,
he is never, ever called out for it.
Now he's saying Andy is like, Reza, you're in charge
of keeping your friends honest.
So, why did you keep a secret?
Okay, so now...
What? How are we rephrasing this? That is not the problem here!
And then Ressa is like, I kept all of us secrets.
And like, I, all of them, including how she was going to the same doctor as MJ at the same time.
And she was afraid of running into MJ in the hallway.
And also I was like, no, that's not true.
That was just a joke I made. No, it wasn't.
And then you know, this is Raza who always is like, it was a joke, bitch.
Yeah. And she's like, well, that's, that's completely honorable.
Raza that you kept a secret for a friend, but that's what friends do.
And you don't think I got secrets about you
I'll put lip tremble, upper lip tremble, upper lip tremble.
And Resa was, you bet.
You lost the, bring them on. You know you do. You're crashing and burning anyway. Just scorch the fucking Earth girl.
And Resa was saying, I was, I had to sit there and watch MJ ask questions. And I'm just thinking, I wish you guys could have had an honest conversation which I get I've been in those positions before where you're like
oh well I'm so annoying that like my friend is making me keep this secret
because like you guys just like talking out like it's so stupid but like
whatever just like get over as a you add
well I can't imagine having friends who would fight over who had frozen
embryos or not that is nobody's fucking business okay and also is obviously
lying by the way I mean I don't believe i suffer one second when
she says that she got all these eggs fertilized and frozen just in case and
they all were boys because that's so i i i don't know if she is or not i
honestly don't even care like i don't care and like and i think that actually
her response was see here's the thing, here's she then totally bus rez,
because she's like, she's like, okay, listen, babe.
A lot of people get babe IVF for different reasons.
Sometimes it's because you're like,
you're old and barren, like MJ, and you're like,
or sometimes it's like, you're not ready to have a baby.
So what you do is you do the IVF,
so we can have the embryos that way later on.
You can have the babies, and they were all boys,
but I only wanted a girl. And so Res, it was like, okay, well, why don't you try for a girl and if it doesn't work out
You have those embryos. So that's why I tried and then I got a boy instead. Isn't that right Resa? And Resa's like
Resa doesn't even say yes. He just nods
Well because after all this after all this oh she lied she lied she lied
He was the one who was telling her oh oh yeah, you should try for a naturally.
And like he could have confirmed that like, yeah, it's plausible that it happened naturally
because we were talking about it.
And this is what you said.
And they were still, you know, you know, I'm saying it's just like, yes, yes, he's caught
again and nobody jumps on it.
And then Andy tries to help him out again.
It's like, he's the worst, Andy.
It's like he is the worst, Andy. It's like he is the worst defense attorney.
He will take up the case of some of the worst people on these shows. He's like, but
Resa, no, he goes, but Asa, don't you think it's weird that you had all these frozen
embryos, the world boys, but then when you tried naturally and it was still a boy, don't
you think that looks weird? No.
How is it going to look weird that statistically
she has 100% boys and then she happens
to have another boy when she tries the natural way?
Like, how is that weird?
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
It's a knowing that he'd like start standing up
to make Resa look better.
There's no making Resa look better.
Everybody attack resa.
How many, how many years in a road we have to tell you?
Yeah, exactly.
And then they show clips for next week.
Well, the question is, does rag group do I cheat?
Do we cheat on each other?
Well, it's different because we're gay.
Oh, so now it's just some casual thing that you
fuck around on Adam.
When last year, Gigi said,
well, there was some video of you sucking somebody's dick,
and it was this huge sob fest about blah, blah, blah.
Well, I would like, I would cool your jets
because that I firmly believe that's trick editing.
And I'm sure that's like part of a larger context response.
Bravo is always very guilty of making things sound way more
illicit than they are.
But the reunion ends with Andy saying, response Bravo is always very guilty of making things sound way more illicit than they are.
But the reunion ends with Andy saying, so does everyone believe Asa? Who believes Asa?
Mike's like, I believe Asa, which was shocking because after all this, Mike believes Asa.
But MJ is like, of course not.
And Gigi says that she doesn't. And Sherman's like, yeah, well, I don't know. I kind of
think it was an embryo. My bad.
Actually, what about you?
Reza actually GG's answer was I don't think it happened naturally no. Well, what do you think they're asking you GG? Yeah
Say we're so insane
Valeria go you know and then Reza is like what about you? Reza do you believe us?
That do you as like don't don't don't don't don't don't don't
Cliff hang on me. They both look away Yeah, so funny. Yeah, so Do you believe us? Do you, is like, dun dun dun dun dun dun. Cliffhanger.
I mean, they both look away.
Yeah.
So funny.
Yeah, those shots.
Yeah, it was really, I really got fired up on this episode
because between the racial stuff and this bastard baby stuff,
which was if I was just so obnoxious.
It's amazing to me how much an entire cast will refuse to learn or
progress during a season full of so much shit like this. Like no one learned
it thing. Nothing was racist, nothing was insensitive. It's like everybody had
an excuse for fucking every little thing. You gotta, you gotta, you know, admire
the complete consistency amongst these people. You have to actually really don't have to so
Anyway guys, this has been a very super swell fun
Shaz reunion episode go to watch crapens.com to buy tickets for our live show
And tomorrow we are back to talk some real house highs of Orange County as they head off to Iceland
Which will be strange and interesting in its own way. I'm real house highs of Orange County as they head off to Iceland Which will be strange and interesting in its own way. I'm sure
And then later this week we just have more more bravo
We're winding down on some of these shows because
November 5th we got almost
Get some shows back Atlanta married to medicine
What's the other one? Well the escape was like a four week x show about candy being on escape, which I'm excited for
whatever the question is whether we're gonna have time to cover all these shows because we we have to also be able
You have to survive and we're going to Mexico in the middle of it.
Aller!
Well maybe we'll just do some bony's over that one.
Yeah, we'll figure something out, but all everyone needs to know is that we will be back tomorrow.
And if you don't subscribe to us, now it'll be a great time to do so.
So go subscribe and all the platforms that you listen to us on.
And we'll talk to you in Maniana.
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