Watch What Crappens - Shahs of Sunset: A Turkey Hear-acle

Episode Date: September 18, 2017

GG can hear! It’s a miracle! Unfortunately, she can also talk. This special Thanksgiving episode features attempts to break up friendships, relationships and bonds with fetuses. Enough to go around. Enjoy! **This week’s premium bonus is a journey through Ben’s childhood theater career. For bonus episodes and extras, become a premium subscriber at http://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. For all of our bonus episodes and premium content, become a member over at patreon.com slash watch what crap ends

That's patreon.com slash watch what crap ends You can also find us on social media on Twitter. We're at what crap ends on Instagram and Facebook at watch what crap ends We'll see you there I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, I have cramped, Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors Cindy purchase girl song wasn't amazing person Just saying okay Kelly Barlow when she goes Barlow we go high low Kristie Dowdy the OG Prem supreme and our super duper premium sponsor Kelly Grant the most gorgeous girl in Texas. We love you. Hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens, the podcast about all

that crap we love to talk about on Yeal Braves. I'm Roni Karam from the Rose Pricks Bachelor podcast, which will return with new Bachelor Ari, hopefully soon, because I miss those dumb holes.

And here I am with my partner and little bestie, Ben Mantelkirv to be side-boying with you. We'll return with new bachelor Ari hopefully soon because I missed those dumbhows And here I am with my partner and little bestie Ben Mantelker to be side blog and the Banta Blender podcast. How you doing? Howdy everyone Ronnie and I are both feeling very emotionally vulnerable today and We're going to turn that emotional vulnerability into snarkiness directed at the Shaws of Sunset. So just be prepared. Oh, that's where it comes from, you know. Just be prepared.

You learn sarcasm when you beat up enough in school. You know, at all times. That's for pain, guys. Don't forget that, okay? I'm the real victim here, like Reza. We had such a heart to heart before this episode. It was really wonderful. And now we're like, raw.

It wasn't we weren't fighting or anything, but we were just like sharing feelings, just about life. And now we are ready to take that rawness and put it into podcast form. It's gonna be amazing, an amazing, amazing show. Well, we had a really amazing weekend as well. Yeah. It was super fun.

So fun. It was Katie, Kizorla's birthday. She of TV Gasm. the second wife's club, nail files and second wife's club and the painted nail and the t shop and the wife of Walter soon to be wife of Walter. Yeah. So we love that girl. It was her 40th. It was a karaoke party down in Korea townown and we had both been partying all weekend. And so I was like, I'm tired. So we're like, well, let's go because that's one of our best friends. Let's go. We'll have fun. Oh my God, we were there 30 minutes and ended up having like the night of our lives. We had so much fun. Yeah. I went into that night like a bitch. I'm just gonna say it.

I was like, Ronnie, it had nothing to do with Katie. I just didn't wanna go out. You know, when you get to certain age, you just don't wanna go out. And I just was like, Ronnie, like one or two drinks total, it's gonna be 60 to maybe 90 minutes and then we're gonna go, cause we went together, we shared an Uber.

And lo and behold, we're suddenly like, I had so three, 30 in the morning. In the morning. Yeah, I called the best doctor ever. Dr. Tito. He says, I took a trip to Corona. He fixed my ass right up. And like, how can you not have fun around Katie? She's so great.

All of her friends are so nice and so fun. Yeah. She'd rented out this entire karaoke place. It's like an old nightclub from the 30s. Everything's like glittery and there's big couch. It's like an old nightclub from the 30s. Everything's like glittery, and there's big couch. It was so fabulous and fun. It sort of looked like the watch what happens clubhouse actually. So it was this weird living room slash glamour karaoke live band situation. Yeah, it looked like the set of celebrity game night. Yeah. So she was super fun. Walters always so nice. All of her friends are so good.

And then Tom and Ariana were there because they're friends with Katie too. And so we always love seeing those guys out. We don't get to all that. I've never met Ariana before. Actually, that was my first time meeting her. Yeah, she's usually not out when we see Tom out. And she was rad. And so it was great getting to just talk to those guys. And we got to sing some karaoke songs all together. Yeah. And then Katie ended the night with a rap. And Tom was like beatboxing her rap. And let's not overlook the fact that Ronnie finally got up. I did two karaoke songs. And I was I sounded terrible. I was there sometimes I can sound halfway decent in karaoke. Not a never good, but like halfway decent.

But this band was playing in a key that was just, it did not work with my instrument. And so my gift was not able to be fully presented to the audience. And so, I- It was so full of crap. You did a great job. So I wasn't even gonna sing it first. It's intimidating singing in front of Walter because he's only written things like my heart will go on

and, you know, hero and all I want for Christmas. Well, I'm also Walter literally walks around while people sing his songs. And he's like, that sucks. Yeah. So I was like, okay, maybe I'll just not pretend that you're good. Like that we're good. You know, I was like, I will avoid any Walter song. Thank you.

So usually these days my go to song for karaoke is you out of no by a lot of small set. So I announced that. I was telling Ronnie and this and like two other people who were there. And with the two other people they know Ariana and like, oh no you can't do that. That's Ariana's song. And I was like, what? So then I was like, sorry I did like this fake thing. I was like, well she better step off. And they got so scared. I was like, I'm joking guys, it's fine. She can do it. I'll let her have her song. So I was like, I'm gonna go to my backup song. So I wrote down the number for careless whisper

and I was like, but I don't know if I want to sing. Maybe I won't sing it. And then all of a sudden the band starts playing careless whisper and it's like, does anyone want to sing careless whisper? I was like, well, it's fate. So I get up there and I'm like, it's fate. This is gonna be amazing. And I just start croaking through that song.

Like I've done that song in karaoke before and I've killed it. It was not happening. It was horrific, horrific, horrific. Not true, only in your head. But what's more important is that Ronnie, you were being sort of like, like, I don't know if I'm gonna do karaoke,

but eventually Ronnie finally got up there and started singing Proud Mary. And I think this is the first time I've actually heard you truly sing, not like do like one of our fake songs on the podcast. And side note, I did submit to Lou for you to iTunes and I'm waiting for it to get cleared. So everyone just holds your horses all five of you. But Ronnie you sang, first of all your voice is so good. Yeah, everyone, yeah, everyone just holds you hold your horses all five of you, but um, But Ronnie you sang first on your voice is so good. It is so lovely. You're hitting those deep notes It was like he's like

Good job down in the seater. I was like Jesus. Well, I could hit those, but I couldn't hit the it was too high And it was live band karaoke, so I felt like they should have been able to change Hi, and it was life band karaoke. So I felt like they should have been able to change. Exactly. I think they were playing to track, though. That's the thing. They were like, yeah, they're planning guitar and drums, but there were still a track. But Tom Sandevol got up on the mic behind you and he was doing back up. So just the two of you guys singing proud Mary together was so, it like filled my heart in a way I never thought it could be filled.

I know. I was saying it was great. It was the performance. Girl, you were my Tina. That's like the nicest thing that's ever happened. Thank you. Oh, no, he was your Ike. You were the Tina.

Tina's the primary vocal on that. No, Tina, I just held that mic away. I couldn't hit those notes. But the best part about that is that afterwards, uh, we all were outside on the corner while you guys were smoking. And then I was like, talk about Tina Turner. And then Tom Sandivall and I bonded about Tina Turner very deeply. And the moment was only trumped later on when we piled into an Uber and we drove to the next, like, to an after-hour spot. And they were playing the wave. And I was saying how it's like my favorite radio station.

And I was like, watch the next song be Shade. And the next song was not Shade. But then the song after that was Shade. And I, I feel like I fully screamed in the Uber. Yeah. And then we got to talk about the secret, the rest of the way there, which, you know, you know, I love to rag on some secret. Oh my goodness. I love a

2 30 AM secret taboo moment. Thank you for letting us talk about that, you guys, but that was such a fun fucking night. And we had already done our bonus episode for this week. So I wanted to make sure we at least talked about it because that was such a fun night. And it's such a crazy world at least talked about it because that was such a fun night. And it's such a crazy world where we get to like do this from our kitchens and our underwear or our apartments. And then our friends know such fabulous people that they give us these nights out. That we have to make zero effort for.

We just show up and drink, free sit, and have the time of our lives. Exactly. And it's not a situation where we're like, oh, look at our new friends. Look, we're friends with Tom and Rihanna. Oh, look, we hang out with Stasi. It's not like that. It're like, oh look at our new friends, look we're friends with Tom and Rihanna. Oh look, we hang out with Stasi. It's not like that.

It's like we are literally like, we have a podcast about Bravo. And if we're hanging out and we see a Vanderpump rules person or real house stuff or whatever, we're gonna take a picture because we want, like, because it's cool, like we, I mean, we sit here and we sit on Skype for hours every week and we talk all this shit.

So it's like, it's like going to the zoo. It's like, oh my god, look. It's a it's a it's a Kristen in the wild. I know. I told her I told her, I don't know. I would like credit for not Instagramming you. Okay. Ariana could sing her ass off by the way. Yeah. Yeah. That annoyed me. I was like, wow. I'm like, new. I, that annoyed me. I was like, wow, who knew? I was like, okay, I'm like, I appreciate that you are doing a Lannister than I could, but you're also making

the question whether I ever should do a Lannister. Oh my God, she was like a professional singer. And then Tom Sandevol also did a Paradise City, right? You did a Paradise city, right? You depred of city. And he was like doing an axle rose. I was like, yeah. I was surprised what a fun fucking night. And then Katie having like multiple wigs to put on.

And what was she doing? Was she like doing a, like, she was doing like an acapella hypnotize right like by biggie wasn't she? No, I don't think she was like she was like just rap. I thought she was because I thought she I thought she went biggie biggie biggie. Can she see sometimes you're worried she's hypnotized me or maybe she was just like flowing in and decided to like dip into some biggie. No, it was a song. I was like I'll back you up but I can't beat box and I don't know this song. So I just made stuff up off the off stage and sing along badly anyway. But it was really fun. So today we have Charles of Sunset. I have no segue from that, but it's like,

life is sometimes a crazy dream. And then we wake up to our nightmare. Well, the segue could be the last time we saw Tom was when we went to that crazy stars party back in April and we also saw Gigi and Layla there. So there you go. And serve little sure. And sure. Like, hey guys. And I said, Hey, Resa always makes someone the victim this year.

Who's it going to be? And he's like, I think it's my turn. I definitely got some of it. I don't use she's cool. I do sound exactly like him. I'm so tell I finally found my calling life I sure have an impression it was like I can also do like a really good impersonation of Tony from like survivor three seasons ago I'm like great I'm so glad I have this very specific impersonation. I can talk like, I'm out of practice. I can't do it now. So funny.

So we opened this episode with Mike and, um, Mike and Reza walking dogs. And it really made me red. Finally answering the question we've been asking for nearly 20 years. Who did let the dogs out? Mike and Reza Hey, I have that I literally have that written down somewhere else and I'm gonna have to change it Yes in the Auckland in the Auckland episode Damn it. We're there even dogs in the Auckland episode. No, but Antwerp. So I'm gonna have to

We have all text to you like just can you make a like a LaBouche reference or real McCoy, it works. I'll text you something on the slide, so it'll be a surprise to y'all. The knowledge of music is so bad. It's like who let the dogs out, that's so sad. So the sad part is that I actually cock block your, who lets your dogs out, joke with my own,

who let the dogs out. See, people we haven't changed. Yeah, but it was for Mike and Resa So it actually makes more sense and they were walking dogs and they were outside and they could literally have that on their iPods and who let the dogs out? I don't know, bitch be like, I'll leave the dogs in. Like that's so Persian to leave the dogs in. Like, I don't know. I don't know if she let the dogs out. Like, bitch, tell a brother. I let the dogs out and I'm really hurt that they left.

It's like, wait a minute. Who's the victim here? I'm looking at this doggy door and I'm realizing my door's never gonna be the same. The dog, the actual door, let the dogs out itself. I've been laughing so hard in the first 10 minutes of this week, my throat hurts. Taking the week off. You know, it's a good day because I had my Starbucks reward and I think that's what's fueling, fueling this podcast is joy from the reward. So, Res is like, well, you know, because Mike's saying, oh yeah, I wanted a million dollar house.

And Res is like, well, you should be thinking of girls. Because you know, you're being real shady about dating in the club. You be like, hey bitches. And Mike's like, yeah, but look, I had two bitches in the club and I didn't school fuck them, you know, because like I'm in a long-term relationship. I'm not just twiddling my duel. I'm working on it. Like you aren't working on it. Every time he says duel or anytime anyone says duel, they always flash duel equals penis. Also, I like how Mike puts him out. He likes being the wise elder all the time being like you're destroying your your parents your parents said family

You look back. It'll be too late. He's always saying the stuff and yet the same time He's like I could have had that bitch. I could have had I had the bitches all over me But did I skull fucked him did I stick my duel in their mouths? No, I'm like Like if you want to be taken seriously as a wise old man Maybe stop referring to the bitches in the club as the bitches in the club. And it was a fake club anyway. We knew it was 2 p.m.

We knew, okay, it's not that hard to figure that. He's like, yeah, you know, maybe I want to put all my fingers in the bowling balls, but at some point you got to own the alley. Classy, Mike. Classy. He probably bowls with those inflatable things in the gutters anyway. Cheater. So of course, Raza is trying to entrap him and it works because Mike's, you know,

literally like dumb as a box of rocks. So totally worked. And he's like, wait a minute. You're not divorced yet. You gave me a date. Listen, white girl. I circled that date in red sharpie to give support, okay? That's permanent bitch. I'm like, what is a paper calendar these days anyway?

Bitch I was just gonna say something about red sharpie, but it wasn't gonna go anywhere I was probably just gonna say exactly what you said. So, numbs. I do that. So, numbs you make a joke And I'm like, yeah, exactly. It's like then I just say exactly what you say. I'm like, wait, why did I just say that? I'm just saying what Ronnie said, but it's Reza that's all I mean like literally the same thing over and over He's like are you guys circled I circled that date just the way I circled the date that Also went to the same doctor is MJ. Oh did I say that out loud bitch? That date is frozen in time just like I've known all the long that ossa's bambriels were So he's saying are you not getting to force because you think there's hope and

Mike's like no no man no no no no no no no no no no no no man You know the same way Mike lies about everything like his colored eyebrows start to like twerk or whatever No, poor Mike and then Mike goes no man look, bro our romance ended with no ending Like the last 100 pages were ripped out. It's like girl tell me the last hundred pages of anything you've read ever Listen, you're not a Peter Jackson movie. Okay, you have not been divided up into multiple episodes. It ended when you cheated. There is no epilogue here. Jessica literally popped up in a book and said the end like multiple times. An epilogue implies anyone wants to know what happens in the end, like like afterwards, you know,

like we see the end and we're ready. We're dumb. We don't need to, we don't need to know what happens in the end, like afterwards, you know, like we see the end and we're ready. We're dumb. We don't need to know the rest. Yeah. And residents like, well, relationships are like a bike, not that your marriage was a bike. And Mike's like, no, no, yeah, yeah, it was. So dogs are like, we need to break free now. So, we then go to GG touring around the pleasure chest, which is a local sex toy place in West Hollywood. And she's there to get a blowjob lesson,

which was a little surprising to me. I would not have thought that GG needed to be educated in that area. I mean, I would have thought maybe other areas but not this area. But, joining the, I mean, I would understand, if she areas but not this area, but um, no Joining, I mean, I would understand if she like walked into a middle school and wish-hacked because like how educated is GT But you know that bitch has been to the pleasure chest. Come on So oddly enough joining her in this scene is Adam are like iconic tame gay. I was like does he know this is not sir la tab

Does he know he's at the pleasure chest? Does he know that scratches on your anacker kind of normal in the pleasure chest? They're encouraged. So Gigi's like, in my new job as a theatrical actress, my role as a librarian is someone who needs to release her inner slut. I'm like, your new job as a theatrical actress.

Sorry, I didn't, I didn't notice that we had a Diane Weast in our presence. Also, does one cancel out the other like, you're no theatrical actress, enter no librarian. Like, do two wrongs make a right? I don't know. And I'm not going to buy tickets to that bullshit to find out. No, you're in her slet inner slit where the outer one go There allowed to be the same method So GG and Adam start talking about awesome. I don't remember how they started talking better

But they just started talking about her well because GG's like so awesome MJ had this fight and Adam's like the ag thing as he fondles like a leather a strap. Mm. And so Gigi is saying how she's like really struggling to connect with Assa because she tries to reach out and she just doesn't get anything back from Assa except like, oh good, ha, ha, whatever. And then she's like, what is there to talk about? Your cap dance, I'm tired of hearing about your fucking

caftans. I was like, she does have a point. Yeah, but you can't hear anyway. So what I like, we're also supposed to think you're like Marley Matlin now, okay? She's like, I'm going to win an Oscar for this. Children of a lesser duel. Equals penis. My name is Travis at theatrical mathematician and actors out of a star professor equals dual penis.

So class begins and this one is like asking questions about you know what are the challenges that they're facing and I'm like I have no challenges I'm just here for support. So Gigi's like well I have a small mouth and a gag reflex. And for some reason, I just like, again, it's really amused me. I just, I led the way she was like very matter of fact about her, her blow job challenges. Like she's like her mouth is the size of like a straw hole or something like that. Please. And the poor lady who had to teach this lesson, you know, it's really not fun for people at pleasure chest to have to deal with people like Gigi. Like Gigi, you look, everybody knows that you have no

sex hangups, okay? So Gigi walking in there and acting like, ah-ha-ha-ha, what? That's so slutty. It's like this woman is taking time out of her very busy day, GG, okay? And the lady is like trying not to be offended and she's like, well, there's different techniques.

You can massage it, or you can be about, you could do the harmonica where you play it on the sides and the bottom. It's like now you're gonna like make GG think she has a band. Okay. To be fair, I'm not sure Gigi even knows what a harmonica is. She's like, why are you calling my friend Monica, a whore? That lady basically explained why blow jobs on straight porn are so bad. She was basically

like nibbling the penis at the shaft with like at the bottom of the shaft. Who taught you this? It's not quarter of the job, OK? Yeah, we have a substitute teacher. His name is Adam. Sir, please, please school these bitches. Yes, please, please. So then we naturally, we head to a soup kitchen downtown. Where Destiny and Resa are going there at the LA mission.

Because the whole crew likes to go there like the day before Thanksgiving or a few days before to feed people who are basically homeless. So they're just all there volunteering. Basically homeless. Well, I mean, I don't, I'm not gonna seem to ever. I like that they're a kid for person people. Like basic, here's your basic homeless kitchen.

I've never, I've never seen homeless people look so reluctant to take food. But that's the one taking it from like MJ. Well, girl, you can have this cast folding up burritos. Like who wants a GG's bare finger straight from a blowjob class? Well, even this cruise like, girl, I could eat half a milky way off the street. You're gonna like make me put up with this half-ass burrito from that slit. So I like to serve and show them up. I was like, you know, here's one person who does not need a hair net. It's driven because his hair is so shellac down. Like nothing is falling off that head. It is like a helmet of hair right now.

Yeah, it would have fallen off like the Yamaka. It would have just got sliding off. Yeah, they're not. It's like trying to put a screen door on a house made of jelly. It's not going to happen. And then Asa asks, because Asa's already got her hand in the food, so she asked MJ to put her hair behind her to tie it up whatever. And MJ is so mad at like that at that awesome dain to ask you to do something. Like, bitch your hands are full of ground meat. You can pull her in here back.

She's like, you really want me to twist your virgin hair? Am I bad it off because I'm so untrustworthy? I love that you're having jokes. It's so difficult and you're so trustworthy. You are the most, you're even more untrustworthy than Reza. And that's saying a lot. Let's stop pretending that this is just some rumor that's going around, okay? Seriously. And Mike's like, hey, look, a Jewish guy is cutting up pork. Okay, okay, Mike.

Calm the Jewishness down please. Yeah, low hanging kosher fruit right there, with that joke. So then speaking of low hanging joke fruit, then there's like a bunch of fake crab for a crab salad and rest is like, oh, once when I was a kid, I thought I had a bad case of crab salad. Get it? Because that's crab salad over there. And I thought I had crabs.

Huh? Which be like, that's funny. It's like when you have egg salad, but like you put some paprika in it right guys Your food checks are going too far sir It's like when you have potato salad. It's like what's holding this potatoes together? Seaman huh? And Gigi's like what lab mallet like what? Dool equals pin Crab salad GG crab salad

Yeah, Reggae Reggae, it's like Ramonus like season long storyline of not knowing words. Oh My goodness, I'm loving the Oh my goodness. I'm loving the discussion on the internet. Like, is Gigi really deaf or is she not? I'm not doubting that Gigi really has some hearing issues, but Gigi has a new disease every year. Okay.

All you have to do is watch her show for that kind of history. Okay. I'm not saying she doesn't have any issues, but suddenly not being able to hear Reza screaming crab salad. Come on guys. I believe I believe that she has a hearing issue. What I have a hard time believing is that her finally addressing her hearing issues is somehow a stand-in for working on your personality. And now you deal with your anger issues like guys, I'm finally taking care of

me. I'm getting a hearing aid. I'm like, congratulations. Like, I put a bandaid on my cut. Like, suddenly, I'm like a better person. Yeah. Could you please turn in a list of people you've helped in the past? That would not be like nowhere to go from here. Okay. Yeah. And I'm not taking away the moment later on when she gets her hearing aid. Like, that is a cool moment. Those are, that's a great moment. I'm happy. I'm genuinely happy for her. But like, and I'm happy that she wants to work on herself. But I'm not sure this is a, like, it's got to be more than just like, guys, I did something for myself. Like, I couldn't hear, so I got a hearing aid, and look, I'm finally doing Gigi. You know what? You'll be way more terrible when you actually learn how to give a blowjob.

Okay. Hope you listen to that lesson. Okay. She probably got so. Go back with your working gears. So, um, so they're cooking in Asa's like, babe, the baby's smelling of this food and he's like jumping up and down right now. Oh my god, Asa and MJ's like I'm sure he's jumping Good one. I'm like I think it's because you have your hand on a blender right now. That's where the vibrations are coming from And MJ standing right next to her being really nice Yeah, for MJ being really really yeah, I'm just saying it's like did your parents want and did they want that baby? And she's like yeah babe my mom babe has? Did they want that baby? And she's like, yeah, babe, my mom, babe,

has been waiting all these years, like waiting, waiting, you know? And then MJ is like, oh yeah, now you like helped your Persian mom, you know, desperation, that's awesome. But she's really being nice. But then of course behind her back, she's being a total cut fitness. Yeah, she's like MJ's mad at her for for saying, I think actually pretty benign stuff. Like, Oh, you're miss perfect. I get it. You're super miss perfect.

Like your mom never pressured you. Everything was fine. I'm like, I understand. Again, I understand why you got annoyed MJ. And in fact, we had a listener who wrote a comment somewhere on Facebook or on the group or wherever saying like, yeah, it's like it's really, really shady and sort of like really delved into why she thought MJ was mad at Asa because she had gone through similar like in vitro stuff and how it's very frustrating to see someone do that. So I get that. But this is not the battle here. I mean, like Asa saying that her mom hasn't pressured a marriage remain.

I don't know. I don't know why. She's mad at like every single little thing that happens, you know? And also, it's like, well, babes, I promised it 40, babe. I would try, babe, and I did, babe. The years fly. And so she's kind of admitting the in vitro thing in a way, I think. She's like, I did try.

You know, I went to the doctor at 39, you know, maybe with MJ and I didn't tell her, but still. And it just, it's, what do you call it when it's like, shit on top of shit? Add insult to injury. Yeah. And Jay is forced to like, do a burrito. Because that's how you make a baby go to sleep, you know,

like you fold them in a burrito. And Jay is just so pissed. I mean, obviously she's really mad about the Invitro thing. And so anything else it does is gonna piss her off. So I get that too. But MJ was just furious. Yes. So then, oh, what were you gonna say? No, I was gonna just say, I was just gonna transition into GG Tongue to Shervin about Thanksgiving and her sister. Yeah, she's like, this Thanksgiving is like for my parents. And you know, I'm not sure of it about Thanksgiving and her sister. Yeah, she's like, this Thanksgiving, it's like for my parents.

And you know, I'm not sure of my sister, but I'm thinking of maybe possibly texting her and asking her because I'm a good person, okay? I've been working on me. And now I can hear when she texts back. It's been so long since I've heard the plink of my sister texting back. And if you guys think we're being insensitive, no, because later on, Gigi's like, oh my

god, I can hear my phone ringing now. God. And then she starts mouthing the words. I was like, are you not hearing it for the first time? Are you hearing it for the first time? This is what a bad actress you are, okay? You deserve whatever theater.com reviews you have coming up. But yeah.

So GG is saying, you know, we see a flashback of GG and Laila having one of their million fights back to when GG had different lips. And so basically GG text Laila and it's like, please come to Thanksgiving. I don't want to fight Tina Turner's style. I just, I want to do it for dad. Let's do it for dad, okay? I just, please, I'm begging you, come. Okay.

And she's like, I'm theatrical. I'm a theatrical actress on a good path in life. And Shervin's like, you're a huge person. Great one. Bubble, bubble, toil and slime. Harmonica, harmonica. So also to store with Mike, the middle east market, the E lot market. Have you ever been to the E lot market? Is that the one that's no, no, it's not. No, I've been to the Johns next to the little city improv place on the east side. Oh, yeah.

There's a lot of wrapped grape leaves, guys. Lots of dolly acid. Mm-hmm. Lots of middle eastern stuff, but no, pico's too far. Yeah, the E lot market is pretty crazy. Mike, you have to sort of like fight for your right to push a cart around. And there's like old ladies who are just like, they are like doing windshield wipers with their carts.

Like you cannot get by, like big empty carts going back, left and right, swiveling back and forth. And you're like, what, what, what's my moment? You know, like super Mario and like the Bowser's castle waiting for those fire sticks to swirl around. You can just a dark through. You're like jump on top, jump on top three times. Where's the hammer?

Where's the hammer? Where's the hammer? The cashier falls into a pit of fire. So thankfully, Mike and Osir lazy, so they're just gonna go to the prep foods counter anyway. So Mike's like, I'm gonna purify the day. I'm bringing pastries to not alcohol because I like to bring the new Thanksgiving in on a sweet no, look, this is not a new year okay I

know I was like that's Russia Sean which is this week but he's like wet pastries for a sweet no I was like okay you're bringing Russia Sean to Thanksgiving which is nice but like you're mixing your metaphors here yeah and it's nice to know that you're as confused about you know the Middle Eastern stuff as you are about the Jewish staff yeah so awesome So, uh, uh, of course, it's like, babe, my uterus is like cramping. Like, I suddenly have this like weird insomnia. It's like, I wonder if the baby's awake too. Or we both awake at the same night.

And like, are we singing to each other? Like, five o'clock, like literally like somewhere out there. It's not out there. It's like in there. Babe. Babe, my baby has been reading conversations with God on his Kindle. It like hurts. Cause like every time he turns over, like the sharp edges, babe. Babe, my baby just finished reading Jurassic Park.

Babe, babe loves it. Babe, my baby's been watching babe, babe. Babe, babe, my baby wants to watch babe, big in the city. But I'm like, babe, you're in the city already, babe. And babe is like, oh, babe, my baby wants to watch Babe big in the city, but I'm like babe you're in the city already babe and babe is like oh babe She's like babe. I've had like eight months of being pregnant and it's like the happiest babe thing that's ever Babe happened, but like ever since I announced it to you babes you babes. It shit on my babes babes And my cuz I love you. She's like can I finish? She's like I'm not dumb in my tie right.

I love you. He's like, are you gonna have dessert at the end? Because that's how I want to really bring him to the end of the year. She's like, babe. I just like that he automatically knows how to start the apology process. He just cuts her off. I love you. I love you, babe.

And he never admits a fucking thing he does wrong. This is what makes me crazy about Mike. He's always acting like, oh, he's so peaceful And he's so centered and he's the dad of everybody and then he just fucking lies, you know, or he just doesn't admit it So he's like, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, you know, because but look I was genuinely concerned, you know I know it seemed like I was saying like what your baby's a bastard But what I really meant was I love you, I'm like, what, your baby's a bastard? But what I really meant was, I love you and I'm concerned. Yeah, you were concerned that her baby's gonna be a goddamn bastard, okay?

Yeah. And that she was having a baby with the black guy, which you said pretty clearly at the time, you know, and someone has a right to be pissed at that. Stop acting like you're being her best friend by asking her that day. Right. And then he starts calling her out when they were in Israel that when MJ was at the dinner table crying about her dad who's been in the hospital with a stroke that also was taking pictures of the food and didn't seem like she actually cared. So also was like babe like I didn't hear it like I would not have done that if I had heard

that. I actually believe awesome. I don't think awesome would be the type that would do that. And she said that because I think what I wrote down is that she said, babe, the fact that you're even saying that you think MJ is crying for her dad, you're wrong, babe, which is what she said at the time as well. And which is true. It's like MJ looks down at her, gets pissed at her announcement and then suddenly starts to water works about her dad. I'm totally with her.

Well, she may have said both those things. I mean, I don't know. I mean, look at us turning into Gigi, but Cream on porn But Asa said that she didn't hear she didn't hear it. I it was a long it was a big table I actually I believe that and what I also believe is that I believe that Asa if she had been crying at a table I believe MJ would have been taking pictures of not just the food, but her face and everything.

So, you know. But at least Asa has an excuse, you know. She could have been like, I was being nice to MJ because while she was crying, like her best friend was sitting on the table, you know? I just wanted to make sure she had pictures. So she didn't miss him. Yeah.

So then Mike does something that I find to be very satisfying, which is that he basically tells Asa, oh yeah, it's resists the one who's been spreading all this shit about you. So if you're wondering, if you're wondering who's been going around talking the most, it's Resa. Oh right, after calling her the queen of deflection too. Ask. It's like it's your best friend.

It's your closest friend. It's your best closest gay friend. It's your closest friend. It's your best closest gay friend. It's your best closest best of life's spiritual path. Best French. He's like, who? Who babe? Who? Resa, God damn it. That's good that Resa gets called out once in a while. You know, like, because he does throw the pot the most. Yeah. And he's like, yeah, but he was defending himself against saying your baby's a bass, a black bastard, basically. And he's like, yeah, but he was defending himself to get saying your baby's a bass, a black bastard, basically. And he said, I mean, I did it. But then Mike was, by the way, I don't think Mike was being like terribly, I am going to like push back a little bit

in the sense that like, I know Mike was, was saying like, yeah, you should be married, but I don't think he was really like MJ was the one who really was like your babies can be a bastard That's not what Mike was saying and I don't think Mike was saying like I can't believe you were with a black guy I think he was just like and he literally said it He literally said it. He said Well, first of all he's ganging up with MJ. So he knows where she's coming from, right? So that's my first black mario. Yeah, but he was saying that the person pulls her, marry a black guy.

He's saying like being unmarried and then being with a black guy, like that's a huge thing in the person. Like, why can't we just talk about it? Which of course you could just talk about it, but when someone just announces their pregnancy and you're on camera and you're with your whole group of friends to like start giving your shit about it.

Like all that stuff isn't supportive. At the very least, it's unsupported. Well, I don't think that he was actually saying we need to talk about it because you're doing something wrong. I think he was saying like, I want to talk about to see like, how is your family dealing with it? This is sort of like it's like in like Persians, usually marry Persians, or you're not, you're having a baby out of

a wedlock like I think he would I I read it as he was saying I just wanted to discuss like how your whole family is reacting to this and you being like oh everything's fine everything's fine feels like you're not really letting me know like what's going on that's how I read I didn't read it as I can see I could see it that way I think maybe the reason I read it darker is because MJ sitting next to him going, you're gonna have a bastard baby. Yeah, because MJ did do that. See MJ was saying you're a bastard baby.

I think that Mike is just like, you guys should be married because you've been together for so long and they're gonna have this baby. Like you should like just get married at this point. I don't understand why you're not married. They had already, Mike and MJ had already discussed it first. So when they were bringing it up, it was like,

I don't know, it's, I don't know. It's like, if you stand by MJ, are you an army of MJ? You guys think deeply on that. Yeah. But either way, I mean, his intentions are not as evil as MJ, obviously. I mean, and then, and Mike, to his credit, he did really stand behind his words. He was basically like, you know, if you were, if you were taking in vitro treatments and you knew MJ was doing that too and you didn't offer to help her, that's fucked up. And I was like, you know, he said, kind of, he sort of laid it out there very plainly and directly and, you know, he had a point. I mean, I also think that I think that also has a point to him saying, you know what, I didn't want

to share with her because I don't trust her. But, um, yeah, but I just gotta be don't want to share, you don't want to share with MJ, like the decisions you want to make with your main about having the baby whatever, but if she's going through in vitro, you know, you probably could have said, you know what, I'd actually started doing it too and we can bond with it and it would be a way to actually bring you guys closer. Well, I think MJ's done nothing but be awful to Asa for a couple of years. So I can see why she wouldn't want to share it, but I could see that side of it.

I'm just glad Asa at least nails her real reason, you know, because she tells us like they're mad, but they know that my relationship with Germain is private. He wants it. He wants this relationship kept off the fucking air. They know that they confronted me about it three in the last year again, and I stood up for it. It's not Germain's, it's Germain's choice to stay private. And that's it, you know, exactly.

And that kind of is the answer to everything. And then I like, also goes to Mike, she goes goes babe. Imagine this. I'm pregnant, right? I'm like really really I had no idea that's that's very difficult for me to imagine aasa very difficult GG pops up. She's like no Go back to bed behind the sweet counter, okay Speaking of GG, we then go to GG at the doctor's office because it's not an episode of Shaw's unless we go to the doctors. And just the other...

Her parents are dressed up like she got tickets for Hamilton. I'm like, what is going on? What? Is GG graduating kindergarten today? The dad's in a suit and the mom's in like a glitter paschamina. What the fuck is going on here today? Well, because like when she was making the appointment, someone was was like okay, GG great 3 p.m. On Tuesday

I'm gonna pencil you in Hamilton. Oh my god mom dad. We're going to Hamilton So um, I'm gonna pencil you win. I know this could be hard. I'm getting a purple heart Listen, I know you're hurt you carry many scars. I'm getting an Oscar. Oh my God. I'm a my new job as a professional actress. Oh my God. I got an Oscar already. Carly fat lane. Anyway, so she's there with her parents and then I think MJ shows up too and MJ is like, you know, it really takes a lot of balls for Gigi to admit that she can't hear well. Like, I don't think it really, I mean, maybe it does. Maybe I'm speaking out of turn here, but I think it's just like, you can't hear well.

I don't know, maybe I shouldn't pass Judge Manda. Everyone has their own journey. But either way, my favorite part was that Dr. Sweet opens the door and she sees like the parents and MJ and she's like, oh wow, the whole gang is here, huh? All right. Are they going to watch your fantastic performance of repeating donkey water and oil again?

You just can tell the doctor of sweet hates this. She's like, I wanted my practice on TV, but not like this, not like this. MJ, I like when people are like, sorry, I'm late and they're carrying a Starbucks. It's like this is super important. Also, I'd like to point out that Gigi has mentioned before that she didn't have great hearing and that she refused to wear a hearing aid. It was seasons ago, but she's like,

I didn't ever want to wear a hearing aid as a kid or whatever. I can imagine saying that it's Balzy to wear a hearing aid But she's like, I didn't ever want to hear where her hair and gay does the kid or whatever. I can imagine saying that it's Balsey to wear a hearing aid because I know a lot of people are afraid to put those on or they're afraid of what it makes them look like. So that, I would say, but just to say, like, oh, I can't hear it for a while.

I'm like, bitch, I said that every day. I'm always like, wait, could you see that again? I can't hear you. I can't. It's Balsey to get a hearing aid, but it's not Balsey to wait until hearing aids are tiny injectable little things that nobody sees. That's just called waiting for the right time. So Gigi gets her hearing aid in.

She gets her little thing. They put it in. It was very much like, I was getting matrix vibes. They're putting thing in and a little bug is in a crawling and track her for the rest of her life. But she gets her hearing aid. It just tried her way. It's gets her hearing and it gets right away. It's like no thanks.

If you don't want me, we're going into Shalom. Get me out of here. I'm calling out of her stomach. No one's home. So Gigi's like, here anything. She's like, oh my god, my voice is so loud. And like I've seen these videos on the internet before, like someone's first, you know, the person

that put into the cochlear implant, turn on the cochlear implants, stuff like that. And they're always like, these really lovely emotional moments of someone just starting to cry. And it's always like really heartwarming. And she's just like, oh my God, I think I need to throw up, I'm going to throw up, I'm going to throw up, this is crazy. I'm going to throw up, not quite as emotional.

Not quite as exciting when you see it that way. She's like, I can't hear myself. I was like, I think you're doing those backwards. But she's like, look, I can hear my ringer and it's that. Ring, ring, ring, and she's like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh GG come on now. I thought it was like what did I always thought it was Stanley and Brulia. This whole time I've always thought it was Whitney singing I will always love you. I mean I am a card. My last note for the scene is idiot. Okay.

Uh, Turkey day. This episode, by the way, is called Tale of Two Turkeys, which is hilarious to me all the while. That works. I wrote Shaw 6.9 Tale of Two Turkeys, LOL. Yeah. Hey, so, uh, Lily, uh, Shervin's mom is preparing at at Sherman's house for his Thanksgiving party

and what's her bun's analysis there. And she's like, I want to show girls how to do pomegranate the right way. You cut off the head and then you bang it. I'm like, Jesus. God, God. God, God. God, God. God, God, God.

Could you do this in a less violent way? And then Annalise is like, I'll do it. And she gets it, like, and has it perfect. And he's like, this is the first girl I realize. Like, my wife doesn't have to be Persian. Oh, okay, okay, sir.

What, what, what you saw with the pomegranate and blow all over her hands. Turns out white people can also extract seeds from a palm of granite. Who can do? Who can do? I actually, I learned something because I actually do, I sort of do it the same way

where I cut off the base and then I sort of do the, I cut down like the ridges, but I didn't know if you'd thwack the palm of granite if they come that much easier. I was excited. I was like, I learned. Yeah, girl, you got to. Because I was, I just do the thing where you make the slices and you pull off the wedges and then you go into like a bowl of water

And you sort of like separate them in the water and that way the other shit falls like floats up and the seeds fall down I hate those seeding motherfuckers. I hate to have to make pomegranate Reduction to put in champagne at a restaurant. I used to work at you. I hate those seedy little bastards I mean, I love pomegranate seeds, but those stupid membranes, they drive me nuts. Right, guys, membranes. Yeah, right. Yeah, insane in the pomegranate membrane. So, service really making a huge effort here to be like, I didn't cheat.

I didn't cheat. I didn't cheat. I guess who I'm going to have at home now, like I could get used to her at every event. Mom, look, it looks like a wedding, right? Would, I mean, would a cheater have his girlfriend open up a pomegranate? I don't think so. I wish I could talk like a Sherman, but I'm going to have to impersonate your impression of Sherman to get the pressure

of Sherman ever going. I know. Well, you know, my shirt, I don't know. I feel like my Sherman is just like a little bit like it's sort of like somewhere between Toia from Mary to medicine and Tom's hand of all. Oh my God, that's what you do. Like that, it's kind of, I'm kind of getting it there to give it like that. Thank you. I'm gonna write that data by notes. I'm really excited to see if I can get my Tommy back because last season I felt like I did a perfectly fine Tommy,

but the season my Tommy's been deranged and I worked on it. But you know what happens is I work on it and then we start podcasting and I become overstimulated or something and then everything comes out like which is not too far from Tommy. Yeah I was gonna say Tommy gets stimulated very easily and it's our MJ. So MJ is like hey you setting everything up and he's like could you please hide your tips. Yeah she shows up with a bin of makeup. Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just going to end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife.

And I'm Sydney Battle. And we're the hosts of Wonder E's new podcast, Disantel. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity view from the build up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What deserves session with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon.

Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or wonder ya. You thought she was bringing food for the meal. It was like no, it was all makeup. Yeah, and she's like, this is going to be my first Thanksgiving not breaking bread with

my dad. So you want to talk about your affair with Annalise at the Thanksgiving? Can we just focus on making this napkin stand up? Oh, she's like folding a napkin. What are my David Blaine? Yeah. And then she's like MJ's mad that Shervin doesn't want to talk about the affair. And like, if anyone wants to bring it up, he's going to kick them out and everything, which seems like a pretty normal response from anyone who's hosting a nice Thanksgiving. Yeah, like you're not gonna accuse me of having an affair at Thanksgiving at my house,

right? In front of my mom. And she's like, just because you host Thanksgiving doesn't mean you can decapitate me like a horse in toss it and someone's bed. What? I didn't know, because she was trying to make some strained Godfather reference. She's like, oh, the sure father. I'm like, the Godfather, it's not really about a guy who doesn't want someone to ask

about his affair. It's sort of like a mixed message there. I feel like she could have done better. Yeah, better, better movie analysis. Maybe go fatal attraction or I don't know. Yeah, also since Mike is spending this whole season like hunched over with like terrible eyebrow makeup and you know acting like a court leo and I think he would be better for the godfather. Yeah, I think so too, especially because I can imagine like running around a garden with an orange wedge in his mouth. I'm sure it's happened. And it's like,

oh wait, it's just his teeth. Oh, random tooth saying no, his teeth are amazing because his brother's a dentist. We get it. So over at AUSA's house, they're trying to like make it look like there, you know, the other people are just normal, fun family times, you know, threatening to bring up affairs. But over at AUSA's, let's play some modern jazz

classical dance music and make it look like she's just too fucking great for Thanksgiving. Babe, I invited Twilight Thorpe to Thanksgiving, babe. So Thanksgiving is our heaven, babe, because you know, we adapted it. And she said Thanksgiving and I were made in heaven. She's like, we adapted to our own likes. Oh, look, mom, Germain tied my shoes. You see he cares babe Okay, a way to bring germane into it. Yeah to be fair

I actually the the the asa Sultan Thanksgiving experience is actually more of the sort of Thanksgiving that I like because Shervin's was all formal I don't like a formal Thanksgiving where people are wearing blazers I want it to be like cozy and comfy. I wanted to be like like Juliet from Lady Siddland to be like, I need a couch. She's sort of on the serving spectrum. We like to put in our pants hot dogs. Yeah, so I love that the editors put in that thing with us complaining about her shoes. I can't even tie my shoes anymore, babe.

This baby I'm telling you, it's like he doesn't want me to wear shoes, babe. Thank God for your man. He tied my shoes. Babe, like the doctor literally prescribed me to stay away from negative energy and stress and then rezo walks in the door. I was like, hmm, well, I guess if you stay away from it,

it's going to come to you. There's no staying away from it. So it follows. Yeah, she's like, babe, that homeless thing was amazing, babe, but like I haven't been on my feet in that long for so long. My hair smelled like a turkey. And whereas it's like, amazing, you even found the time to calm. BITCH BE LIKE I'M BIZZY I'M SUPRISE YOU WERE INEDIDING YOUR KEYBREW AND CHRISTION AND MuzzleM Leader videos, perhaps incorporating some of Shervin's footage that we all shot while we were avoiding being killed by little children with toy guns.

If your baby learns the way you did, he is probably in your womb with a gun right now ready to shoot everybody here especially me because I'm a gay. That's so talking about. Yeah, he's acting like an asshole because of course he's going to find a way to turn himself into the victim here. When God damn it. He does it. You know, I just bit my tongue while I said that. I'm not going to win. God damn it, he does it. He knows the guys.

I just bit my tongue while I said that. The guy is so talented when you really have faith that even at someone's family Thanksgiving, that Reza will find a way to victimize somebody and then turn himself into the victim. I'm like you wouldn't do that on Thanksgiving. And he did. Hope finds a way.

Hope finds a way. Hope, guys, hope, flip. So over at, over at Shervin's, Gigi shows up and MJ is changing into her clothes. She's like, I don't have a proper bra. I don't know. And then Mike shows up and Vita shows up. So the whole gang is getting together there. V had a Luann entrance. No, Vita. because they show her coming in and she's just kind of bloated in by the wind she's like oh like the Vida version you know

money can't buy you bra money can't buy you bra elegance is one money can't guy you blow Assa she say la vida se bon What is this chic What is this him yag so back over in asses Asus like let's go outside to get lemons for the salad dressing babe

Yeah, okay. And rest is like, whoa, that's a badass tree babe babe. Like I've never, like that's a Persian to have like a big lemon tree. Like why people be like, I'm gonna have a tree no lemons. But like with Persians, when life gives you lemons, you plant a tree with it. Badass. It gives you lemons, you salad dressing. So that it's so delicious that people won't talk about the fact that you're a liar about in vitro, okay, babe? He's like, that's like, can't a kallaka for Luca, that's tree, babe.

And I was just like, babe, babe, I'm so sad. It's like, you know, like ever since I've been pregnant, like, it's like one harassment after the next babe and like, I'm sad. Like, I feel like I don't have a single friend. Like, no one can be happy for me. And now I hear that you've been like talking about me and was like, yeah, I have. I was like, okay. I'm just said you're goalable to me.

And she was like a baby by 40 and then she frees his eggs and then like, poof is pregnant and I'm like,? And also goes what's poof? What's poof babe? Like I freeze an egg. I get it like stuffed with like that's a long process. It's not poof, okay You think well, I hate myself for getting twisted up in MJ's pain I wish I wasn't the one you confided in you were going through IVF and she wasn't the same time and I never said one word until there were cameras around. But I wanted to say, dude, MJ couldn't turn to you. Oh, I'm glad.

And there he was. He was a victim for getting caught up in MJ's pain and he was a victim for, you know, not, you know, for not saying anything to MJ that that that he was a victim because Asta put him in a position where he couldn't say something to MJ. I was like, well played, Resa, well played. And as Asta sticks to her guns, which I'm with her, she doesn't have to fucking tell anybody when she goes to IVF.

I don't care. Exactly. Like I said last week, they went to the same doctor because it it's free within Instagram post and we all fucking know it. Yeah, okay So Austin's like well, I understand she's hurt, but that has nothing to do with me and then this show is It's like so low rent that they just add in a top chef What is it Gail Simmons gonna come out? Why is this like the judging table on top chef? Did you, did you mean to put a resa and a bad position under the lemon tree? Did you mean to make your baby taste like paprika and old spice?

Hello chefs, on today's challenge we want you to turn lemons into lemonade. Literally, we've brought you here to Asa's badass lemon tree, where we want you to use her tears and resist tears to make lemonade with the badass lemon. Did you mean to make lemonade from a god-on-cala-fuck-tuk-tust tree? Babe. Oh no, don't mind my good friend Gail Simmons. She appears to have eaten dilemmons like apples. Ha lesser heart Parent-chart rubbery eggs. Like okay Gail go back behind the tree girl the tree has just been a bad Gail pattern dress the whole time She like raises her head Like a painting does all the eyeballs start when you walk by it She like raises up her head. It's like a painting does all the eyeballs start when you walk by it.

So Ressa's like, I don't care about IVF. I resent that she made me pick a side. And now I am stuck between two women, Ayadur. It's horrible, horrible, horrible position to be. You don't know what it is like to be in this horrible, horrible, horrible situation that I sort of caused. And so, Austin's like, I still like him, but I never forget. Yeah, she's like, of all the people, babe, I didn't expect it from him. I'm like, did you met your friend, Resa, before?

Have you ever actually watched the show back? Ever. Like, even when episode. So, back at the other party, Mike, on leason serving, um, MJ, I don't know. I'm not sure if they're all dressed all formally. And then MJ steps out of the bathroom in this crazy red pantsuit. And we often harken back to one of our

favorite quotes of big business saying, you're dressed like a blood clot. And it never went to the office. You look like a blood clot and it never we were in the office. You look like a blood clot. She truly looked like a blood clot floating through a vein at that moment. And then Tommy's story line. Her whole story line is trying to wear a bra that won't make Vita mad, but she's wearing like a skin type. Boop's so funny. So she gives Vita kisses and Tommy's like,

man, and Vita's like, you see down, you see down and have conversation. And he's like, hey Vita, you look so nice. It's tough to sit and talk when you want to snack, huh? Because the snacks are over there. She's like, see it. He's like, it's so beautiful. Runs in the, must run in the family Vita Say oh yes, yes, and then she Vita just turns to MJ and it's like is that same bro

But we agreed on we agreed on that one Like poor poor MJ this woman can even tell what Prashe's supposed to be wearing Beautiful I'll take you both look beautiful Almost as beautiful as Mr. Matt. Go Matt's. Go Matt's. So Gigi and Annalise outside. So Gigi's like, um, come on. Oh, she's talking about Lohm and she's like, you know, it's the first person I'm in love with and it's like Come in or leave because I'm so afraid and analyst is like well I think that might be because you're unsure of whether or not you should fall in love with that person Yeah, she's like I can't believe we got a tattoo a tattoo is a is major babe

I mean, it's a fear of completely following falling in with that piece in a flat tube. She's like, didn't you get to hearing fixed? Oh, yeah, sorry, sorry. Yeah, I heard you. So Shervin, she's like opposite. She's like, is it raining because I hear a do drop falling out of a cloud? Okay. You scared me now, babe. So Shervin's now mumbling to Mike. Me like, hey, bro, it's, you know, it, hey bro, it's like a family of that. And I just don't want me bullshit drama happening.

I'm like from Gigi. I'm like, it's a bit too late. The way you make sure there's no bullshit drama from Gigi. You don't invite her in the first place. Yeah, you don't bring in Gigi. And of course Gigi is just said, there's wedding bells going off. I heard them because I can hear things in the future. No, that's just your battery going low.

So, I'm backing up babe. I'm backing up. She's opening up the front door. Keep hearing door bells. And she actually said, serve on the other hand has been doing the dirty with my friend and I feel a responsibility to this girl because we're friends and I'm gonna tell her on thanksgiving. It's like, oh, no. And Shervin's like, I just don't want Gigi to disrespect my house.

And even Mike is like, dude, you're actually like, it's a palace. It's been a whorehouse ever since I met you. You can't disrespect it. So outside, Annalise is like, well, as far as I'm concerned, this cheating thing, I believe, oh, conservative has come up to her now, right? Yeah, he's like, oh, he's like, hey, can I say something? Never cheated. Then what you're about to say, but I never cheated on anybody. Oh, so turkey time, am I right, everyone? And so Gigi's like, so Annelise, that whole cheating thing, how does that like not am I right everyone? And so Gigi Gigi's like so an at least that whole cheating thing

How does that like not cause fear for you and sure? I've got dancing for that. I got an answer. I got an answer right now. Oh She goes how do you get to that point? An at least goes, you know how? Because I don't let fear control my life and they just stop and Empty goes, God, she's way more mature than us. And then they just drop it and go inside. GG's like, I don't allow my ears to control my life either. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself and Vita. She's terrifying. GG's like, oh my God. Shalom just parked in his picking his nose before he comes in. I can't hear it. I'm coming here. Sure. Shalom walk. He's like, hi, baby.

Uh, and then her mom comes in and she just starts like jumping up and down. Like she just won a car. Like, Gigi's mom is so like traumatized by this point. Yeah. Like she's basically like Ellen Burst and in like, recommend for a dream. She thinks she's on a game show at all time. She's like, Oh, Hamilton was wonderful at doctor's's office and now I win car prices right? Blingo, yes! I am Alexander Hamilton. I'm Alexander Hamilton. I'm Alexander Hamilton. She's like, I'm sandwich. Oh, you can hear that. Oh yeah. Basically, thanks for giving just devolves into like surrealism. It's time to be like, oh, what a sandwich.

My favorite person on this is us is Chrissy Matz. I'm laughing myself, fucking silly. I hate when I just giggle through entire episodes, but I can't help it. Yeah, so this is funny. We said we were gonna put our raw hearts into this episode and gosh darn it, we're doing it. So Gigi's So Gigi's parents show up at like but no Layla no Layla and the show doesn't even try to tease it out. They like show they cut to everyone

You know chomping down on peas and carrots and then all of a sudden like us who shows up It's Layla Oh my god, and then Gigi start acting traumatized She's like librarian who's never had sex librarian who's never had sex She's like doing a harmonic on a fork Yeah, I'm like this. She'll have the drumstick And then Mike is like you invited you were the one who invited her don't like stop making that face you invited her She's like method method leave me alone leave me alone. Let me just go through it

Okay, so the theatrical actress makes it toast everyone and she's getting emotional. She's doing that Emotional voice she does do that G. G whisper Yeah, she's like I just want to thank Shervin for opening your home to us and thank you Adelaide's for coming I know you guys have personally been dealing with some stuff, which is so rude. Like, yeah. Classic Gigi. And she's like, and I want to thank Layla for showing up

because I begged and begged for her to come. And the fact that she came, wow, that's like, I'm really thankful. I'm like, it was so shady, because it's basically making Gigi look like the perfect daughter who just wants to be together. And Layla being the holdout and not being, you know, being the bad daughter and Layla is just like,

I beg you in the text to do it for dad. Thank you for having me to this affair, even though you're having one on your girl, it's like Jesus, Gigi. God. It's unfair to remember. And then she goes, kids shouldn't have, parents shouldn't have to struggle over the hatred of one of their kids.

And then she's like, Yay, great speech you did it. From the daughter who wore the wrong bra on Thanksgiving, just in case her mom off at the table like you fucking people man Well really there was a Thanksgiving miracle because then they started to eat food and Vita says the nicest thing She's ever said in history of Vita. She goes hmm Not only looks good. Tastes perfect. I was like, oh, I said who drugged Vita What's going on Vita? It sounded like some weird Campbell suit commercial where they're like what is grandma think?

Not only looks good tastes perfect Campbell suit by Vita Tommy slipping some knee squeezes in under the table or something and what happened to Vita damn Layla is pissed someone told her it was MJ's soul. Oh, tastes delicious So Layla is pissed. Someone told her it was MJ's soul. Oh, it tastes delicious. So Layla goes to smoke outside all bitterly because you know, she's a drama queen just like her sister. So she's like, yeah, she's not. Oh, man, I'm thanksgiving man. I'm a theatrical actress also. Yeah, she's like, oh, I'm the real theatrical actress. Why is nobody asked me? the real theatrical actress was nobody asked me harmonica my ass I've studied harmonica my entire life did you see me in the Bob Dylan story I was magical in that brilliant so serving comes out right now Mike comes yeah sure when so he was like what's going on that was a really good

tell us what it that was like great tell So it was like put some butter on it because that's amazing tells Yeah, and then Mike comes out to and is like it kills me you sister you guys can't get along it kills me Yeah, like I'm beside myself. What did he say he's like yeah, I'm living He's a nivit you go leave it well Layla cuz he starts automatically talking down to her and you know And I mean Layla's funny because she's having a very showy, so low cigarette to show how angry she is, but then when someone comes to talk, she wants them to be like,

oh, Laila, what's wrong? And Mike's like, can you get it together essentially? But he's doing it in his counter-tending way. So she's like, you're being a jerk, you're being a jerk, you're being a jerk. And she's like, you know what? Like, I haven't spoken to my parents in a year, and that, but that toast was fake.

That was a show for my parents. And then Mike is like, you know what? I'm like, leave it because you guys are ruining your parents fucking lives right now. She's like, you're being a jerk. You know, because they're both successful. I suggest the one who just took more of this parents money to sell baby shoes. Exactly. To be fair, I feel like at some point we have to look to the parents because their daughters are totally fucked up. And you can see the way the parents deal with them, the parents are like, oh, so jeep, but jeep, but Leyla, I'm like, you guys are pushover parents, you raise two spoiled brats. I think it's so confusing when you're first generation,

because it's like, well, this, this is America, you know, like maybe this is just them growing up as Americans. Yes, and that's why Americans get spanked. That's why American mothers like mind kept fly swatters or wooden spoons to the glove compartment so that they could reach Yes, and that's why Americans get spanked. That's why American mothers like mine kept fly swatters or wooden spoons to the glove compartment so that they could reach all the way to the way back. Okay, let me tell you something. It's a way back. Let me tell you something. No one is more undisplained than an American child. No one. Yeah, so if they were like, oh, this is Americans. It's like, well, that's the problem. Yeah, you did it. Yeah. Yeah, good job. Yeah. We're out of control children. So Mike is not having it.

So then Gigi's like, I need to smoke. I need to smoke too, but I don't want to go by her. And so end day comes out sensing, you know, blood in the water or whatever. Yeah. She's like, oh my god, is this the fair part? Are we going to throw Laila over the side of the mountain? Yeah. So I'm just like Gigi, would you like me to get your sister for you? or are we gonna throw Leila over the side of the mountain? Yeah.

So I'm just like, TG, would you like me to get your sister for you? Because Mike's having a conversation with her that maybe she should be having with you. So MJ is just like ready to start the pot right here. And you know, Vita is like in the other room, and being like, these turkeys tasting better and better. I can tell, my daughter is doing my work now. Oh, I'm such a happy mother.

You know, being the mother of MJ, I thought that somebody's stuff with stuffing is a bad thing. Now I'm learning how delicious it is. Thank you for this lovely meal. Like, who are you? And Sherman's like, hey, guys, it's like, you know, this is sort of like, it's like, it's my Thanksgiving. So like, could you guys all like go back inside?

Because I don't want any drama. I don't want to just expect this house and then leave. So I can go inside and I was like, oh, fine. And then it's like, Gigi's left all their alone and the camera pans out wide. She's just in the corner of the pool area smoking. I'm like, Gigi, you're doing it.

You're doing the Blair Wood thing wrong. You've got to go around. You've got to go around. The got to go, Lackrice. But I love how they've they do found footage right. I love how this cast has figured out how to avoid fights because like you see both of Gigi and MJ coming for you and servants like, all right, throw water on it and this over.

You know, second time in a row. It's oh, not in my house, not in my house. So good. So back over it. Also, she's like, guys, I'm pregnant. I need to eat I need to eat guys like I'm gonna get hangry or my baby's gonna start kicking or something like he almost cut me with the Kindle, okay? So I guess what babe I got pastries But it's like thank you. No, I was talking to the babe babe We're texting. So they bring out the turkey and we're like, this is a badass turkey.

Bitch be like, this is more badass and that badass lemon tree. Like, is badass is new thing now. It's more for clack than tingatong tong tong tong tong tong the lemon. He's like, normally it would be joyous, but somebody just pulled the rug out from under our friendship and I am hurt that she doesn't understand What a mess she made and does not care about the dynamic of the group Everything is telling me to get up and go home and he's sitting there like he's gonna get up and leave a fucking Family Thanksgiving with her parents who have always been lovely to him. I mean, this guy is such a seaworth.

What a martyr. He can't leave not because he's nice, but because there's a goddamn plate of food in front of him. And he's like, never mind. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, to be fair, it takes a lot of strength to pull out the rug from beneath Resa and Asa. A lot of strength. Not even Peggy could do that. And she's really good at pulling fabric off of things. But for Resa to sit there and be like, wow,

she did something that ruined the dynamics of the group. I like to remember when you accused MJ of being on pills. Do you remember when you pushed her out of the group? Do you remember when you came for us? Do you remember when you came for GG? Do you remember when you accused MJ of being on pills. Do you remember when you pushed her out of the group? Do you remember when he came for us? Do you remember when he came for GG? Do you remember when you like arranged fake flowers for everyone from GG? Like at what point do you not remember any of the times that you've totally fucked with the dynamics of the group?

You have out when you isolated Mike for a whole season. How about right now telling everybody that you just told that she had IVF, you fucking asshole. Yeah, although I understand his impulse to want to leave because I was like Babes I want to make a toast. So I like to start by saying I'm so thankful for this baby. It's like the happiest thing in my life ever Thank you Great Who thought that has been about the baby of course?

Well, you get to do that your year of pregnancy in that baby of course. Well, you get to do that your year of pregnancy. Okay, and Resa. Oh, God. Wait until Resa has a goddamn baby in some love and stomach. He's going to have that girl on a leash. I can barely walk. It's going to be trust. It's going to be the worst. Yeah. Next season will be way worse than this. He will put aucidus shame. Yeah. I think the only reason why Reserville wants to go home is that he's jealous that he's not at Shervin's Thanksgiving where he knows all the drama is going down. Yeah. So well, and also he's in Venice, right? So that's a long drive back to Hollywood. And nothing's open on

Thanksgiving. I think he was like, I leave now and beg in and out to reopen their doors for five minutes. Or I just... But I will say, though, the food at Asa's place looked delicious. I actually always think the food looks good there. And I say it all the time, if Asa her strength would be food, if she did a cookbook, bitch, I'd be like, that's a bad-ass cookbook. I'd be all about it because her food always looksbook. I'd be all about it, because her food always looks good. I feel like she appreciates good food. I trust her authority in food,

but don't give me diamond water or these weird artistic expressions in via film. Give me a cookbook, Asa. Give me a cookbook. Hell yeah, in a caftan. In a ca... Actually, I do like the caftans. I actually like the Asa caftans.

Maybe you like a caftan cooking, like an apron-type thing, but a caftan. I actually like the osso captans. Maybe like have a caftan cooking like a apron type thing But a caftan that I'm into with the book and and you know what like last season We were like giving her a ship for like cramming these caftans into like envelopes You know, they just a caftan but all these caftons into envelopes and everything like oh, but now that we're doing merchandise I'm like real I get it. I get it Keith teen So Leila is going over a text with I think her dad right? Yeah I'm like, real I get it. I get it. Keith Tien. So Layla is going over text with I think her dad, right?

She's like, look, dad. This is dated March 3rd. 20. Yeah, she's like, this is when I picked her up from rehab, OK? And I said, I'm here. And then she said, I'll be right down. And then look, a text from 11 days later to say thank you.

11 days. I'm like, send a bus like why wouldn't you just fucking send an Uber to pick that bitch up? Why were you even going over there? Exactly. And then the dad's like, but at least she said thank you. At least she said thank you. She said that thank you. Okay. Good point. Come on. Let's play back, back dammit. But then, so the Gigi walks up and she over here, she's like, oh, oh, she takes off her invisible hoop earrings

and she's like, I actually met, actually, I messaged you the next day, the next day she's like, no, there's no tags at all, but I messaged you the next day and so then they start like fighting and MJ tries to scream, like tries to pull Gigi away and she's like, no, no, and Shalom is like, I see prices are out of the way. I thought it was the mom who was like, no, no, she's like, no, no, the mom was now like crying at the table.

Like tears falling into the back. I'm trying to make things right. She's like, right, you devastated my kids. When he asked you about the boot about your boo boo when we picked you up And I said it was in your head and she's because yeah, and I said you have the same boo boo Yeah Beat is just standing there watching it just taking it all in she's just like thriving on it She's like, oh family discontent Bistings me either when do we get to MBA's bra?

Can I blame any of these on Tommy? She's like getting taller and more gorgeous. Like you think reversing. Yes, yes. At the fair. Who had the fair? Come to me now. Come to me now. Yes. At the fair. Who had the fair? Come to me now. Come to me now.

You're unfortunate, Nying. Ba. She's like, oh, wait, I took the voices from my eels the Vita Mermaid So it's sort of funny how I'm deaf and now I understand it's her not me Yeah, God willing she can go work on herself like I got myself some hearing aids Yeah, and so now the sisters are crying and Layla's like I'm gonna I'm gonna leave So then so then Gigi's I think she's outside of the saloon And he's like dig the high road dig the high road and she says like you know I walk up on my sister and she's saying how well

I can actually hates me and how I'm awful and that it up I'm like to be fair you walked up on her and she said she didn't thank me so you are crazy and now you have a hearing aids who can't even blame it on bad hearing okay you just are both crazy like you they both they both are crazy but like Layla was not she did not walk up on Layla saying I hate her she's awful she's so mean Layla was she was bitching yeah but Layla's walked in total bitch face had total Bitch face the whole time then ghost Ragnarini the tattletail and get Gigi in trouble and rant and raved all of her friends like they're both awful fucking human beings

I mean these parents deserve a break and they're like no we play back at men Come come Laila come play back So Laila of course yeah, Laila as she did this whole thing. So, because Laila, of course, yeah, because Laila, as she did this whole thing, and I'm leaving, of course she didn't leave. She's still lingering around, and she's like, Laila, play with Shalom. What's the person we're for back in the tankish?

She's like, play tankish with Shalom. Play, she's like, ah, fine, but like, secretly, she, that's all she wanted was to be asked to play back, am in, and she's like, bring it on. Slow mo. Yeah. And then they're like having fun and they're laughing. And it's like, you know, the usual is like, okay, the parents are like, oh, this is so fun.

Oh, it's so fun. Like, faking it, Mike's like, I've seen it a million times. They fight to get along. They fight to get along. They fight to get along. When they're old and They're together. They're gonna look back and they've had children and grandchildren. They're gonna say look how they play But by then it's too late. Mike. That's exactly how you're gonna feel about your eyebrow pencil

Especially when they find out that there are so many other games outside of backhammin Oh, we they could have been playing they could have been playing. They could have been playing said does the catan. Which by the way, I would love to see Gigi and Layla playing says a catan. I will trade you two sheep for one wood. And just Gigi, I just, I'm just imagining just the fury and Gigi's eyes. She wants my wood. Fuck you. Give me back my wood. Like stab stab stab. Okay, I'm gonna take a brick card. We rolled six. There's not even a six on the brick. Oh, I see. I see.

Suddenly because I've got R.A. and bad hearing, I'm not allowed to have brick. Well, it didn't roll the brick. Oh I see. Layla gets the brick, but I don't get the brick. I'm a sexually frustrated librarian. How dare you, ma'am. I gave Gigi wood three turns ago and she still hasn't even thanked me for it. She will. She will. What did Lee she, but at least she gave you sheep in return. Be now young gorgeous supermodel.

Vita's like, boah, ah, ah, ah. Vita, like someone rolls the dice, she's like hitting with a ping pong paddle. No, Vita, it's not the same game. What is this island? What is this longest road? Yeah, I have longest road. No Vita, yours is only two.

Two more. No, it's longest, it's a long road. This fucking show, I can't believe we just did an hour, 20 minutes on the show. To be my god. Wow. Well, that was so fun. I need to rest my laughing.

My laughing throws great. Thanks everyone as usual for listening. I hope everyone is able to find themselves some turkey. Oh my god. What a fun show. We will talk to you guys tomorrow with some real housewives of Orange County. Oh, yeah Just promise be be nice don't be be don't be be yeah, and and next week Can you believe it or our Chicago show is next week and we are we're doing the

Define act of putting together a VIP swag bags for people about VIP tickets and it looks like you'll be getting some stuff I think from orbits and tasty minstrel board games or tissue-missile games so we gotta give a shout out to those To those fine fine companies for for donating to our VIP swag bags. Yeah, we are so excited you guys We will see you next week, but also we'll see them are Iosel. Yeah, come on back man, you hear Bye Hey prime members you can listen to watch or crap and add free on Amazon music download the Amazon music app today Or you can listen ad free with one Dree plus in Apple podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at one Dree.com slash survey.