Watch What Crappens - Shahs of Sunset: Baby Not On Board
Episode Date: October 27, 2018Asa makes her return to "Shahs of Sunset" this week, and basically she says "babe" a lot and then gives Adam a blanket. Meanwhile, Reza still seems as interested in a baby as he would be in a...n ear infection, and Nema and GG's romance gets about as hot as tuna-on-tuna porn. Oh, and we think Mike might be a slum lord. Come listen to our recap and stick around for a hilarious Crappens Mailbag segment! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me is a lovely lovely person
Uh, if you don't know him, you're about to meet him. It's Ronnie Kerrum from the Rose Bricks Bachelor Rose podcast
What's up Ronnie?
What ha been?
Haaah
Get your full on Texas accent out today.
It's because I was looking over comments from real housewives of
Alex, mother, mother.
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Please, oh my god, Frazier and rods. We'll have a little cup of coffee and someone, we got a surprise, a visit from Lilith.
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His real name was Miss.
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No one, not a single person.
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And here's something that's really, really cool.
This is something that has just been finalized like 15 minutes ago. So remember how Ron and I were doing these videos
on TV Party app where we'd like sit down and talk
for like 15 minutes about what was going on Bravo
and stuff like that.
Super fun, super, super cool.
So we did that for about 12 weeks from May to July,
love doing it.
So TV Party is kind of like changing their vibe a little bit,
but we're still gonna work with them.
So starting, I guess, I can't remember the start day.
I think it's either next week or the week after that.
Obviously, we'll keep you updated.
We're going to be doing this thing where we'll be gabbing on TV party apps, sort of like
Instagram live.
We'll go on, we'll stream, and we're going to do some fun stuff with it.
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room with Carson and Tom and like turning on that TV party app and streaming it and just
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Bueller will be there it might be something as simple as I am like waiting at the DMV
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There'll be more details coming, but long story short, like download that TV party app and stay tuned for us.
Gavin, we'll go with the next week.
I don't remember.
We have an official start date.
There's literally a contract.
There is an official start date and then from then on for the next 12 weeks we'll be doing
it.
It's a super fun and a great way to interact with listeners and things like that. Yes, and today it's very classy day here because it's Shars of Sunset Day.
The classiest day of the week.
Oh, Shars.
Shars of Storms, sir.
Yeah, let me just bring up my notes here, Ronnie. You would think I would be organized. Oh, good. I'm looking at my note. The first thing we see on the latest episode of Shaws,
the sunset is a full-on close-up of Mike driving and licking his lips. It was like,
tense. Yeah, I put Mike's sticking tongue out in car. Yeah.
These are things. This is not how you open a show.
Yeah, it's not how you pull us in. we don't need a close-up of Mike going like
Like close-up, you know looking at this coconuts in the mirror
What he's trying to drive his car and about to properly kill pedestrians and that thing. I think it's huge
Okay, this cannot be said enough people with these giant cars cut your crap
You're probably the same people who marched in the streets for me to get rid of my straws
Yeah, was I was was I telling you that I saw a G wagon on giant giant wheels the other day?
Does that tell you that? Yeah, they have like new wheels.
It's not big enough. Yes, not big enough.
Okay, you know what people you are not you're not you're not tamer barney flipping things over in glamest dunes.
Okay, you're driving down Martel Avenue.
Okay, so just relax.
Yeah, good luck finding parking in Trader Joe's meeting it.
Yeah, hey, thanks for taking up three spots
because you know, parking perfectly with those cars
takes up two spots, but you know these douchebags
do a whole diagonal thing and it's like three full on spots.
Yep, and then some keys.
And then they get mad when a shopping cart accidentally
just rolls into them and gives it not even a real thing.
Accidentally.
I mean, how many times have you seen one of those big cars
with tons of shopping carts?
That's the world I want to live in.
Where people are just like, fuck that car.
And it's like, roll their shit.
You know what, I'm not going to advocate violence, okay?
Because then people are going to do that,
and then I'm going to get blamed for it at the end.
Yeah, but I advocate giving nasty glare towards my shoe head,
right, to formal complain to us.
Like, I have this beautiful car on giant wheels,
and now it's like, that's a deal,
because people are sending their carts into them.
That was my phone, I apologize.
You guys didn't get email, I did.
So, anyway, yeah. You guys didn't get email. I did so
Anyway, yeah, so big cars stupid people. He's picking a present and if his
If his if his gigantic card doesn't make you think he's fly
Then and let's just listen to them talk. Okay, but it's like what up?
Boy, and then Mike's like what up? What up? What up? What up? What up? What up? What up? What up?
Yeah, boy, it's like oh god you two. up what up what up what up what up what up what up what up Yeah, boy, boy!
It's like oh god you two you're you're about 25 rolling around sunset. You got damn giant car, okay?
I am so street look how street I am bitch be like I lost 40 pounds but I gained
130 times of new car to sit in
30 times of new car to sit in
Times live fun, but I put up on boy. Let's listen to LMFAO
Okay, so this is this is what is sicko I am
So they go up to see Mike's duplex or apartment building or whatever the hell it is that he's got this property Shat. Yes. I looked at the dry cleaning sign on the outside and then looked it up on Google maps
Because I was like I think I used to live near there because I did I slip and little on many okay
Yeah, where everybody talks like Ramona. Yeah, like you want some yellow rice. Hey, would you listen love?
Would you like some peanut bread? Okay?
Do you like it Kepta Keptap?
Sorry, so I looked it up and I was like wow this just makes people want to live at Mike's place even more
because it's like one star on Facebook.
It's like the worst dry cleaner ever.
And yeah, it doesn't look like a very fun block.
But there is a church across the street as well.
Which, where is it?
When I looked at it, I thought maybe it was Echo Park
because he was saying like you could see Sunset Boulevard.
It didn't even occur to me that it might be actually
in Little Armenia. Armenia yeah it's on
Santa Monica and Kenmore okay okay so while there's no
others and even in the Google Earth picture there were refrigerators outside
the property yeah I'm like God if they're really good or not this place yeah I
mean is it is it has it ever been more obvious than Mike is a slum lord like blatant slum lord
Like horrific so he's talking about like so he has a duplex there and he has the the next property over
Which is what we saw which is the real dump and?
Basically he wants to expand his duplex into that property and make it so I don't know
He has some awful idea that's never gonna come come to fruition. And that's where Reza is like, Mike has lots
of great ideas, but usually they plan by me and they're executed by me and I put a little
airmest Robelanket on them and they look at really good, they look really good in the
end.
Reza is saying stop with everything in his being. I mean, Mike tells us this is going to feed my children, my children's children, one
day my grandchildren.
I was like, how old do you think you're going to get?
You're already in your late 40s fool.
Go have your bait or I'm assuming.
Okay, I'm just I'm just reading the rings on your face.
I don't know how old you are.
So see three, you know, like, and he's like, and they're going to put this on the mantle.
It's like, what they're gonna put this on the mantle as a quet the the apartment Yeah, the rest is like stop stop don't do it
Don't do it and rest is wearing a bright red suit like a stop sign and two octagon pins
Like it's the guy can't be saying stuff anymore loudly than he is. I know. I love I do
Yeah, the way the way that Mike speaks with pride about like expanding his duplex as if he's like
building like Balmoral or whatever it's called where Queen Elizabeth lives,
like you're not building down Abby, okay.
This is not a legacy duplex.
You are planning at the best,
even if you tear everything down
and put up a very nice, beautiful,
brand new, modern building,
this is not going to be a legacy building that's for generations upon generations like oh
Remember grandpa Mike when he put up this building that had in unit
Like why do you why do we have to live here just because your grandma built it?
Yeah, and you know he's a slum lord
I know he's gonna walk around with that eyeliner when he's like 80?
He's going to have all sorts of stupid innovations in his apartment, like annoying things.
Like instead of like a trash shoot, it's going to be like a conveyor belt.
You put your trash bag on the conveyor belt and just like rules through the hallway until
it gets to the trash bag downstips and you just put your bags out on it.
Like until it breaks, until your trash conveyor belt breaks and then there's just trash in
the hallway and you don't come to clean it up.
I like that you're so mad at Mike for his imaginary things. Also you're giving Mike a lot
of credit for building because that sounds like a great invention. Like wow not taking
out the trash. I mean, no but it would never work. It would never properly work. And he
just roasted on top of Morgan. And he's like, look, I built a machine that takes out the trash.
It's called a Morgan.
So then, and then they show like he's at this like shitty, like, I don't know if he was
saying this as a joke, but I kind of feel like he was saying it for real.
This shitty property with the like a this decrepit old gate and some like chicken wire.
And he's like, when I rent this this place out I say security and get it entrance
Like you're the problem on Craig's list
Mike Manor your white Craigslist has never become Craig's book. Okay, sir
I used to like that movie while I still do that movie Queen of Versailles which I
Kee yeah, where she's building this like the biggest house in America, but never gets completed
Yeah, they were talking to her for a long time on Bravo
Like she'd show up on watch what happens live and I kept wanting her to be on some Bravo show, but
It looks like they're gonna have the house of Shoeb instead, and you know what I'm here for it
Yeah, except the difference is you don't get to see the fireworks from Disney World you just get to see fire
From a trash can across the streets. Just get to see the dry cleater starting things on fire for future.
Yeah, exactly. So Resa is just like, hey Mike, sell this, sell this, now sell it, sell it.
The power of Christ compels you, and neither of us are even Christian!
STOOOOO!
The duplex is like the top, the second floor of the duplex is like spinning around and then puking.
Uh, it could use a good purge.
It's the Linda Blair of buildings. So next up we have Empty and Tommy.
Empty's style today is just bath robe at every scene.
She's wearing a different style of like night robe in every scene.
This one's like a silk tied night robe.
She's got tons of them in this show.
Yeah, so they're at the lawyer to talk over the prenuptials.
And Empty's like, I am the Susan B. Anthony
of prenuptial agreements, which doesn't really make sense to me.
Like, I don't understand how those two concepts go together.
Like, is she like the silver,
is she's like the, that dollar coin that like,
thing got replaced by a sacchage of weat.
Like, I don't get it.
She was a woman's right activist,
but also known as the silver dollar.
Yeah.
Was she on the dollar?
I think she was.
I think it was the dollar, right?
Because it doesn't count on the 50 cent coin, which like where are those these days?
Well, I'm looking her up right now.
She was.
I mean, I know it's a bit of a role in the women's suffrage movement.
Right.
Yes.
Obviously.
She knows like she's going to make Tommy suffer.
But Susan B. Anthony was born into a Quaker family,
which cracks me up because this scene starts with Tommy
walking through like,
I'm so excited, my ass is chasing all of Ready, huh?
If she's the Susan B. Anthony of prenuptial agreements,
what does that make Tommy?
Just a guy with sweaty ass cheeks.
He's like the Pat you can and a prenuptials like us.
I don't even know what that means, just sounded fun.
I don't know either, I was about to Google.
Like, I don't even know.
He's the Calvin Coolidge of prenuptials.
I'm rewriting the law in California to favor women.
So she's talking about how she's not going to be hoodwinked
and she doesn't impersonation
of her mom.
She's like, do I look like I just came from the village behind the town and me?
But Tommy falls for it.
He signs whatever she gives him.
Yeah.
And she says, yeah, she tells him, like, if you ever run away with the secretary, I'm going
to cut your dick off.
And I'm like, you're so sweet thinking Tommy's ever going to have a secretary for me.
Exactly.
That's what I was thinking to.
Taskrap it at best.
Yeah, yeah.
And respect your man, girl.
And MJ is like, women of the world, ask for anything you think is fair.
And if you are a woman, anything you ask for is fair.
And guess what?
If you want to give it to you, just go ahead and sign it.
I was like, as much as I make from MJ, I sort of think that's kind of cool.
I actually, I'm like, yeah, actually what she says kind I make from MJ, I sort of think that's kind of cool.
I actually, I'm like, yeah, actually,
what she says kind of resonates with me.
I'm not even a woman.
Sounds good to me.
Always have a pre-nut.
Yeah.
So then we go to Destiny, who is up to her usual hijinks.
This time, it's boasting about the glory of Persian ice cream.
I mean, she's like, who doesn't love ice cream?
And on top of that Persian ice cream,
oh my God, we love our flavors exotic.
Like saffron and rose water and cucumber and rose water.
I'm like, okay.
Yeah, she's very into her saffron.
She says saffron a lot.
I just close saffron with pistachio.
It's so Persian.
Remember when I stepped over that fire that would not have worked well if I was holding
the ice cream because ice cream is cold and fires hot.
I've personality.
Speaking of hot, here's my mom.
Her nickname is Tiki.
Which I never really knew before.
I don't know if it's just because I'm always taking it.
So while this is playing or if this was the first time that we found out they called Tammy Teaky. Oh, I didn't
I didn't know that. The Teaky, you know, it's funny because Reza's dog is tiny. So there
should be Teaky and Tiny. They should have a little show together? It'll be Resa the Oscars.
Stop, Fran!
Oopra, Umo!
So Tiki comes over to the ice cream place and she's like, what happened to 31th labor?
She's like, I just want chocolate. Why do you always get me to San Frano pistachio?
Like, I get it. It's cool. It's different, but like, honestly, chocolate fudge brani, who needs more?
Who needs more?
Who must I blow for a peanut, then, Chuck the fudge brani, who needs more? Who needs more? Who most I blow for a peanut eminem around deep spars?
How many times do I have to get on my knees in front of man?
In order to get a little almond praline, okay?
Really, it's like, geez, you gotta take your mom to Ben and Harry over there.
I like that we've just turned to into a total slut for good eyes.
Why not we have to add something to destiny means I mean Jesus Christ is
talking about ice cream. Okay, this is where we fall into. Let me tell you
something, finding your father will be a real rocky road. If you know what I'm
saying, get me some good ice cream.
Rocky road if you know what I'm saying get me some good ice cream
Just ringer into triumph
So destiny has put on making me hot like a teen roof Sunday
You know what destiny stop talking about your father. I have a shell around me a magic shell
They keep smiling
Mom stop guessing Well, they keep smiling. God damn, it's sherbet! Mom, stop casting. You will always be my little chocolate peanut butter cups on the speaking of which shall
we go to Baskin Robbins or?
So she's like, Destiny, she's all happy in my ice cream shop and she's like, mom, I have
to do this and then she starts crying.
I have to get files for my mom.
I'm going.
Yeah.
And she almost inhales a bug.
And then what, thank God to that fly for trying to shut down.
What, I really like you.
But please do something in your life.
Do something more interesting.
I mean, I actually think the investigation is interesting,
but all the crying around the investigation
is not interesting. Like, she's literally doing nothing, like I actually think the investigation is interesting, but all the crying around the investigation is like,
not interesting.
Like she's literally doing nothing,
but waiting for Monique to send her like,
a WhatsApp message saying,
hey, found someone in Orange County, you know?
Like, we need more than that.
And so like, and like, you can put as many extensions
in your hair as you want.
It still is not going to substitute
for an interesting story line.
Yeah, by the way, if Monique gets run down and across the
walk by the end of this season, you know it's Tiki who did it.
Because she is not having any of this.
Tiki is getting so annoyed because that's me's like,
well, they found Monique found someone and like might be an
uncle, might be my uncle, and I think he might be in Orange County.
And Tiki is like, your uncle lives in Iran,
has wife and children there,
he's not in Irvine.
She's like, no, but you may have moved.
No, he's in Iran and such.
He's like, but why?
I need you.
Will you come with me?
Come, I really, really need you to be there,
you know, because if I were to get married,
God willing, you'd be on this arm
and he'd be on that arm and it'd be like so cool
The mom's like yeah fun raising you alone. Yeah, that would be great. Yeah, let's just give your dad credit
Yeah, I did everything. Yeah, exactly and then you know
I think she's just trying to show through a mom off her game because the she makes her sit outside at the ice cream store in little
Well, maybe they're in Venice.
I actually don't know.
I'm some there in Westwood.
I don't know where it was.
Yeah, I have no idea where they are.
But this is so LA where wherever you are in LA, there's always this person.
Yes, I know he's around behind you in a satin jogging suit, like a satin
floral jogging suit, trying to look directly into the camera and finding a reason
to go back and forth in front of the camera.
Yeah, that guy was so obvious with his stupid tracksuit.
Like, you know what, sir, I know you're trying to get on camera, but you're only getting
onto Shazas sunset, so aim higher.
Aim higher.
Yeah, this show is tacky enough, sir.
Go inside and get your goddamn saffron ice cream.
Yeah, get your saffron ice cream.
Now my Persian ice cream, a place of choice, is Mosh Jamalones on LeBraya, which is delicious.
And if any crap and listeners come to L.A., Mosh Jamalones on LeBraya, which is delicious. And if any crap ins listeners come to LA, Mosh Jamalones is so.
Like those?
No, it's there. But you know the funny thing is I never get the Persian flavors,
not because I'm racist. I've tried them and they're cool, but honestly,
their chocolate fudge brownie is just unparalleled. It is so good. Just go there,
get the chocolate fudge brownie.
Oh, I love that ice cream. I know.
It's my favorite. It's mine. Well, I love that ice cream. I know my favorite point. Well one of them
I don't have a favorite talking much brownies your favorite. I'm not gonna do this ice cream. Oh no, just chocolate French brown
I like I don't know the difference between they're all some of a really good cookies and cream
Here's the thing like saffron ice cream is lovely and so is rose water ice cream an orange blossom ice cream
And I get it. They're lovely, but like how do you compete with cookies and cream bitch how oh
I don't like that. Well, I don't like because I'm saying you to argue
But you know what I really like mint cookie from Ben and Jerry
So I find that delicious because I like mint chip. Yes, and Ben and Jerry's has that version and oh
I mean it is just delightful. What if delight our friend case his favorite ice cream is like mint chip
But he also loves cookies and cream and I wonder if he realizes that there is a he always says his ideal ice cream would be like a mint
Cookies and cream mint chip cookies and cream situation and I go I feel like I have to tell him because that's that's a great revelation
Yeah, they're gonna make him a very happy case case on the case case
A bitch needs to take a commercial break.
Bitch feel like time for a commercial.
That's so Persian.
Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up
on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court.
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And I'm Sydney Battle.
And we're the hosts of Wonder e's new podcast, Dis and Tell.
Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened,
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So next up we have Nima just trying to destroy his mother for a little screen time.
I mean, Jesus Christ, Nima.
God.
Nima.
Such an asshole.
His mom comes to visit and he's like, mom, what do you have on this suitcase? It's so heavy. Almost like the chip on my shoulder.
From you leaving me with a baby with that. I cheated on everyone I've ever dated.
Some on national television because of you.
Yeah, yeah, because she comes in, she's pneumonia's mom and she comes in and she's all excited.
She's like, I lost 30 pounds. Look, I'm losing weight.
Look, what a wonderful night.
Nothing could go wrong now.
And he's like, well, it's actually funny
because it turns out that the way you and dad raised me
has caused scores that have lasted a lifetime,
which is why I can't have a functional marriage.
And that's why I got rid of Erica
because I tried to kiss another girl
and wait to see the other girl.
And she's like, that was very stupid of you.
She's like, yeah, it was Gigi.
Oh, that was very, very stupid of you.
Yeah, I'm not really into this whole,
I'm gonna blame my douchey behavior on my parents.
Now, the story is traumatic.
And I'm not gonna say that it wasn't.
But come on, dude.
I mean, you don't have to be raised by the best friend.
It's like when people say, if you don't have to be raised by the best friend. It's like when people say
If you don't go to church, how do you have any morals? How do you know not to murder people?
Like it's pretty obvious that you shouldn't murder people. Okay. Do you want to get murdered? No
Do you want to get cheated on on national television? No, okay? I don't I mean I don't think I actually am gonna push back a little bit on this one
Ow ow it hurt ow what a push back a little bit on this one. Ow! Ow it hurt! Ow! What a push back!
And speaking of her Mona, we didn't even mention the Ramona and Mario are back to get
her apparently.
Oh wow!
So anyway, but uh yeah, that's all that.
So um, but here's the thing, like this divorce was like a fucked up divorce because the parents,
according to Nima, the parents told the kids like, you get to choose which parents you
want to live with.
So Mona, who is two years old, hugged the moms,
the mom took Mona, and then Nima, he's like,
Nima's like, well clearly at four years old,
I was upset about my, how,
to stop my father, so I went and hugged him,
which I feel like at four years old,
you don't register that stuff.
So that's how the parents decided,
which child should be with,
which is like so fucked up and like ridiculous. I actually believe that there really was some sort of like mental scarring
at emotional scarring as a result of that doesn't mean you cheat but Neema technically
technically he didn't cheat he just said he wanted to kiss Gigi but he didn't do it humiliated
this girl on national television and like, he got on a TV show
But you know, it's all good for her because she was like by and she didn't come crawling back or anything
Which I think is good, but I think that all and all as far as Shah's a sunset people go
Neema is like he's doing pretty well like he actually seems like he seems smart
He's educated. He has a nice style. So he has some like personal issues whatever
But like I don't think he's really...
I think he's like a nerd trying to hang out
with the cool kids and doing dumb shit
because they're...
Yes, but I think I would have more of an issue
if you were a total disaster, if you was a Mike
and he was blaming all his shit on his parents.
I think he's more like pretty functional
and highly functional as a person. He just has issues and relationships that he's now realized there's
a correlation between the life that he grew up in. So I actually, I'm not going to get too
mad at him. I get more mad that he's so attracted to Gigi, which I don't understand.
Yeah, he's trying to. Yeah. So the mom cries the mom cries is like it's not your fault when i'm seeing it's just
your fault
people get over it like you're you're there
okay so adam arrives uh...
adam just kind of fails into
ossa calf tansis he does
no no no no no no no no no no no no no we're at we're at the right there new house
oh i'm at a
he flailed to he flailed to the though. He does his like sort of like
Sashay his weird like Adam sashay that he does you know like the hands go like left and right the butt goes left
He does this little thing. Yeah, it's like a wall
It's like he's shaking his I don't know. I'm doing it right now, but you can't yeah, I'm doing it to squatting off bees
Yeah, it looks like when he's walking I don't know, I'm doing it right now, but you can't do it. I'm doing it too. It's squatting off bees.
Like, he comes in, like, hi!
It looks like when he's walking, he's also trying to, like,
adjust where his balls are in his underwear at the same time.
You know?
He's like, you know, like, if you're a guy,
if you're listening, you know, like, sometimes,
if you have a, quote unquote, bat wing situation
or whatever, you sort of have to take, like,
these weird wide, like, steps to sort of, like,
shake everything out, make sure everything's like aligned properly. And I feel like
he's like, it constantly is like, okay, a little step there and I can't believe it's a little,
little tight in there right now. You know, yeah, I just always write Adam Flael's in.
Yeah, like later on I wrote that he's like the Thanksgiving Turkey that the
president puts out on Thanksgiving, you know, how they're like, save a turkey.
It's like they're just putting you down,
it's like slailing out of their arms.
Whoa!
He does have, like, he does like enter at, like,
I do feel like he has a slight lack of awareness
about his body, much like I do in terms of like,
like space and speed.
Like he will sort of like enter through a door
slightly faster than you would expect, you know?
Like he sort of expect him to like knock over a display
and a grocery store back, isn't it?
Yeah, those pyramids made out of cans are definitely not safe.
Like don't hit those nearly interested
any grocery store, the Adam shops.
Yeah, when it comes to super bull time,
like Adam has to stay away.
When they set those arches of diet coax,
it's like, keep Adam out of the super market.
He's like, oh out of the supermarkets
He's like oh, I'm just gonna go in and get some groceries
So he's like honey look at the house and rest is like only 10 weeks more and then we're gonna have twins right? Yeah, he goes he has where we with our budget and rest is like don't you mean he rest is like our budget?
Don't you mean my budget? He's like no no, we're married. So like what yours is mine
What's mine is yours? It's like well when will you be caching more checks for our budget then?
Yeah, resist all this place like I don't know where he's getting this impression that I want to share things
Share my life
Raise babies together. You probably shouldn't have gotten married, dude.
I know. It's weird because normally I would be on Adam's side. Like really, like once you're married,
like it really should be. Like it's all going to the same place. So who met it? Well,
doesn't matter if it's your money or Adam's money. But for some reason, I keep finding myself
siding with Res on this, which is so weird. Yeah, I don't pick sides on things like this.
I just kind of bitch about them.
I think, I think the reason,
well, that's perfectly healthy.
I think the reason why maybe I like take Resa's side
a little bit is because it feels like Adam
is constantly nagging Resa, at least that's how he's edited,
which is hilarious.
He's probably not like that in real life,
but like he's constantly editing is like shown as nagging about babies, about this, he drops the emerald, whatever,
and so you sort of feel like, you know what, Adam? You know what, like, how about you start,
like, why don't you rise up to, like, stop nagging and why don't you contribute to,
which I'm sure he, like, works in post-production on like the Walking Dead or something,
so like, he probably-
I think American horror story.
Oh, I'll tell you this, okay?
I don't care what I do.
He's talking about what you do.
If we're married and you spend 500 grand and not tell me when you do shit like that,
I'm sorry.
You're going to be fucking dead, okay?
I know.
You will be the Walking Dead, not you personally.
I just mean, you're right.
Future Mr. Karam out there.
No, you're right, which is why it's weird that I'm taking Resaside.
I'm just like basically falling for the editing.
Cause I know, like I'm in a relationship
and I feel very much like, I don't feel like,
oh, I spent this much.
Now he has to spend that much.
You know, I am like happy if I need to like,
if it's a situation where I can, like,
if like, let's say he's been out of work
for like three months, you know, if it was was situation like that and I had to pay more for something
I don't don't even think twice about it
I don't even care and I think most people in relationships are like that. They're like happy to help
Their partner when they're partnered like is not not help the partner
But like happy to like take on more of that because you know like that's the nice part of being by being a relationship
I don't think the other way around yeah
I don't know that res is even that worried about that because he married someone poorer than him
Like he was already on TV, you know and had a successful business
So I think he's just trying to not have babies. Yeah, exactly. That's all it is and then Adam knows that okay
Like when your man tells you straight up. No, no, no, no, no, even though he's he is kind of telling him in a he's always like later later later later later later but
okay guys can I take your order sure I like chicken wings and I'm a
I guess you can't get me that right when is the time
yeah where's it like I've told you once the contractor says there's no more
payments to be made on this house, then the condo
will go on the market and from the money that we get from selling the condo I am going
to invest in an inflatable tube company.
And then we'll see how much money we make from that.
And then we'll consider going into waste management and then we might get some baby shoes
from Mike. When I'm old, I'm up to start cheating on you, and need the stem cells to make my face
look younger, I will consider having a baby.
To take the stem cells from its spinal cord, and eject into my face.
Any more questions?
I have told Mike that I want him to come over with his true-code baby shoes, and put one
on each of his fingers, and walk around the house, and see how I get him to come over with his true-code baby shoes and put one on each of his fingers and walk around the house and see how I get used to the sound of little feet in the house.
And if I like it after three weeks, then we'll consider it.
Oh, so then Adam's like, okay honey, well the money thing will just figure out and he's like,
no, I'll figure it out, find it, he's a money!
He's like, I'm not going to talk about this, gotta go, bye, bye baby!
Yeah, and Resa, by the way, he peppers in a little, uh, little stuff about's like, I'm not going to talk about this. Gotta go. Bye. Bye. Bye. Yeah. And Resa, by the way, he, he peppers in a little, uh, little stuff about like, I
am pretty supposed to diverse my family. Got diverse. I'm afraid of commitment. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
like, no, you just don't want to have a baby. Yeah. You know, look, as someone who's blamed
everything on my parents, my entire adult life, I kind of approved that there's a whole cast
on Brava doing it. Yeah. It's like every single person in here blinks their parents for something, you know.
And part of me is just like that's part of that's part of the privilege of growing up in our
day and age. Like nothing is our fault. It's all our mothers. But the other part is like
your old kid over it. Stop living your parents. So now Adam goes into Asa's boutique and I wrote down
Adam is strutting into Asa. So he clearly has a gate that we were picking up on.
Adam plays into Asa.
Yeah, he walks in like he's in the middle of a...
Like he's in that big business montage when Sadie goes down the fifth ab venue and was like, Duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh Dantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantantant Yeah, except I feel like Adam's version of like big mistake huge would be him coming back into the boutique. I'm saying
I'm back and what you're busy never never never mind. Bye. Yeah, never mind
Do you want to have the baby with me?
Big mistake huge. Oh wait, there's no one around me. Damn it
So he's looking at glasses and he's like you can never go wrong with rainbows on a gate
person.
I was like oh god.
You actually specifically can.
Like it's actually you just did it wrong.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's yeah, and you got yeah exactly.
And then we get to see us.
Okay, I don't care what anybody says.
I miss us.
I was so happy to see her. I was so happy to see her. Street art in Berkaz. I was I was I was so happy to see her. And
when you said I don't care what anyone says like what the funny thing is that you you were the
one who had the two of us I think was more anti-Asa. I liked I mean I know you'd like to but you
also thought she was a raging asshole. But I really liked the balance that Asa brought and
without her there it just feels like the show is just,
it's oddly thin now, you know?
Not like in terms of content.
Yeah, I'm sure we all knew that.
As they're eating in every single scene,
I'm sure we all picked up on that.
So she's like, you know, life is crazy.
But I'm still close with those in the group,
I was close with like Adam and I mean kind of
Res, you know, it's a texting game.
GG, like sometimes she sends me clown face and knife emojis.
Mike never checks in.
So that faded out MJ.
I don't want her near me.
Anywhere near me or my family ever.
Okay.
Sure.
Then last time I saw my just had him him take his giant car and roll over my
front stoop just to make sure that $30,000 worth of gold that's down there is really cemented
in.
Oh, so this is kind of an awkward scene just because I think it's Asa and her store where
she sells blankets that are $700.
Yeah, it was like little blankets
and a little tiny mirror things on them.
Yeah, they're like,
they looked like not very warming blankets.
So basically, it's like a catch-up time
in Adams, like, cell houses and like,
what's it like, mom and June?
And she's like, babe, babe.
It's like a different kind of babe left babe.
There's like literally a babe.
Like when I say babe, like,
it's like am I saying babe or am I saying baby? Like,'t know like babe babe that's he's spoken yet yeah he said babe
baby like yeah so now Adam starts talking about the baby situation with Reza and Asa's like
with Ressa and Asa's like, maybe he doesn't even want kids. Like, have you listened to a word he said?
And I'm like, I don't know.
I'm like, no, he doesn't want kids.
He does not want a child.
It's so obvious.
You think for an innovation is hard?
No.
Babies, that's hard.
Babies is like a pinnacle of your life.
Like, babies change everything.
I was like, oh, God, I'm actually glad.
Why the time she got to like her baby talk,
I was like, okay, I'm glad you're at least
taking some time off from this show,
because this would be insufferable
if it was also baby time.
Yeah.
Because every scene would be here and like,
oh my God, babe, you wouldn't believe
what it's like.
It's so different having a baby.
Yeah.
It's like, you have a little person to take care of.
It's like, oh, congratulations.
You're the first parent who's ever observed that.
So then Adam's like, I'm sorry, I can't look at you.
I keep staring at that blanket up there.
I'm just like, oh, you want it?
I mean, I'll take it.
I mean, it's like $700, but it's like a gift for me to you.
Like housewarming.
Oh, I couldn't possibly.
I'll take three of them, please.
Thank you. I'll take 50,000 of those, I couldn't possibly, I'll take three of them, please. Thank you.
I'll take 50,000 of those. I couldn't possibly. I couldn't, okay. I'll take some more.
Can I trade these for a resist house renovation? I can have a baby. You know, they kept that in there solely to reinforce the notion that Adam is
cheap, right? When he probably isn't, but they, he's like, you know, I know a resist is not going
to keep you warm with babies so here's a blanket
here's a thin blanket made of felt when they are felt that I started some broken glass into so be careful don't actually touch it with your hands
oh yeah so she her advice is like he probably doesn't want a baby and it's not fair for you to make him either. So she's she gives him the blanket and
then she's like here take this little tiny teacup and a coaxful for Rosa. Okay. Tell him
I'm picking up. Yeah. So now we go to MJ visiting her fertility doctor for like the 20th
thousandth time in the history of Shah as a sunset. And he said it. And by the way, I'm convinced
that her doctor is a drain dream balloon. I mean that base
Who does that?
So he's like I was looking at your file and it's been four years since you've been coming here. I was like, oh my god
She could have gone to college. I know seriously that baby that baby could have been a president
You know, there's a full presidential term of baby time. So MJ, maybe it will be one day.
Some day.
President of ETH.
We'll see.
We'll see.
You never know.
So, yeah.
So basically, they were able to fertilize an embryo and like, when the time's ready, they'll
put it inside MJ and everything and get it going.
Yeah.
He's like, well, you know, here's where we stand.
We made eggs, we froze them, we fertilized them,
and even at your age they did well.
I mean, we have one embryo.
Now granted, it's covered in hair, it's wearing the thong,
and it was trying to eat through the pastry dishes like a buffet.
But, you know, we're gonna go with it.
Yeah, you know, the weird thing about that embryo was that
I was telling the other embryos they were bastard embryos.
It's sort of weird.
It's the first embryo we've ever had to give a back wax to, which is crazy.
So MJ tells us she's like, oh my god, I'm so glad I'm doing this with Tommy because he's
the first one.
He showed me that special kind of love.
And then they show a clip of them,
like a clip package of them being above.
And there at some hotel and he sees the bed
and he's like, hey babe, we can walk there.
This is what we can walk, yeah, MJ.
It is especially kind of love.
So now we have Resa, Resa's back at the condo
and he's with Marty, aka Teenie, aka Martini,
uh, the dog, and Miss Mood, the cat. I actually, I actually love Resa's little animal farm
he has going on in there, like, I'm a big fan of his animals. Um, so he's there and, um,
and he's like, he got an invitation to go to MJ and Tommy's. He's like, oh, where an invitation.
It's a Pippa-Lis post.
And then Adam, like, comes through the door
and he just has like this giant box
and like the blankets and like an ice cream machine
and a food processor.
Like, I'm like, where do you go?
He just comes in with so much shit.
No kidding.
He just robbed all of Austin's like office store Yeah, he's like I got a litter box
Yeah, he's like I got moved to a litter box. I saw my therapist today
And she gave you an old ugly blanket
I mean where would you get this from this from like a homeless shelter? It's from Asa.
Oh, it's lovely.
Like I said, he did not seem very happy.
The Adam was over there talking to Asa.
He seemed to kind of pissed off about it.
He's like, listen babe, you're not older baby
because Asa has one, okay?
Yeah, because like, I'm not older Latoya,
knocking on my door, asking for extra gelo. Yeah, because Adam's gonna try Ode to Latoya knocking on my door asking for extra Jello
Yeah, because Adam's gonna try to do like some tough talk. He's like okay. I'm gonna sit down and
stare at you and say do you want a kid?
Yes
It's like Adam how many like it's a recipe cuz when?
And I'm like I don know, five years from now.
Yes, I do want a kid.
Are we talking about a baby goat?
Oh, there he is.
There he is, I will do it in five years, Stein.
But when are we going to talk about the plan?
Because we've already talked about a plan.
When are you going to say,
Brzez is doing his part of the plan?
You remember that plan, where it was giving people
better healthcare across America
from the from the confines of Yvine. Adam's like, oh, wait a second, you asshole. The
Adam doesn't. He's like, okay, let's go back to the plan, babe. And rest is like, okay,
then what was the plan? Well, the plan was not a good baby. Great. Great.
Yeah, so then we go over there and say I do want to say I thought what was fun when when Resa said like I'm not gonna have a baby because also wants to have a baby and I'm like
But I do want to raise our kids with her. I'm like, oh my god Adam
like
It's like it's like I'm gonna give up. I know it's like it's like never gonna get up. I know it's but it's a man. I would I have to be going nuts. Honestly. I'd be going so nuts if I were
Reza. Yeah, well, you know, he married him. Yeah. So next day it's an MJ party. I don't know if this is one of those houses in the hills without air
conditioning, but I'm very mad about it because she's very hot. she's sweating all over herself, and that's what they do in the hills. Because everybody in LA is like, oh, you don't need air
conditioning. Yes, you fucking do. Okay. Yes, you do. You do. Especially if you're gonna be serving
ceviche, okay, and cupcakes, you need that shit to be cold, all right? Especially if you're
dressing like MJ. I mean, good Lord. She's like, how did I get all these sweat spots all over me?
And Tommy's like, how'd you get ass sweat under your titties?
Yeah, so he goes outside, he's like, hey, Wes,
you gotta help get go out.
She got serious boob sweat.
You know when you see on pit sweat?
And you're like, whoa, pit stains.
But he's like pit stains, but under the boobs.
You know what that's like?
It's like a boob stain.
It's like, what boobs?
And I'm like, like oh like Shervin speaking of he's on a motorcycle with Gigi coming up the hills and she's
screaming her head off of course like and he's wearing his like leather
vass and a tank top I'm like sure why why are you trying to like make us
this like you why are you doing that you're like one of my favorites why do you push us away?
because you know he's like a bite he's like a person can't
doll you know he's like look at me i'm on a motorcycle the most expensive
kind you can buy and i'm in perfectly ripped jeans because you know
hot sprawl yeah i don't know i don't know
so um gg brings some rosé to the party and
Res is like oh
Neema likes rosé. Do you you and Neema choose out the same rosé?
Rosé Neema
Like what it's rosé
Yeah, she's like maybe
So Neema comes in and he's like Adam's like so Neema what do you think about
Babies are you gonna have a little teaching give it to me because I'd love to take it and
Neema's like well she was blowing up my cucks after that party he has her table you know
she still had a wring on that's a problem Adam's like I'm! So he runs up to Gigi and he's like,
wedding band, wedding band, will you have my baby?
Yeah, and then there's like all this talk about once again,
the wedding band and she was like not wearing the ring,
but now she's just wearing the band or something like that.
So Gigi's like, you know what?
You know what?
Enough.
And she throws the band in the pool and everyone's like, oh my god, there's a band in the pool.
I was like, okay, cool. I like. I was so hired to band for one of these parties instead of just
a girl waving her hands in the air by a speak of the smile on. Yeah. So it was like a cliffhanger
or something like that. But I was like, I don't know. I don't know. So then Shervin's like, hey, has Mike been in touch lately
with anyone?
Has anyone heard from Mike?
And he was saying, everybody,
I think that Mike's been a little touchy.
Oh, yeah, you're right.
He's been a little touchy.
And then he's like, I know what happened.
I'll tell you, Morgan.
Socker, we all need that.
You guys were just together in Las Vegas.
So then we get a clip because poor Morgan
is never gonna get her proper screen time on this show.
No, no, she's like,
bless her heart.
I mean, I guess you don't normally film a dryer sheet,
but here we are.
I was gonna say, I look like a hairdryer
getting a manicure.
She was like getting a manny patty with MJ and she's like so basically Mike he always
is like I'm in my 40s I'm not gonna change I'm set I'm in my 40s and then like he gets
mad and then he's promises that he's gonna change and like he's not gonna change and it was
like pretty impressive like I'm just always shocked when Morgan says something like with like half
a brand you know well she's still with half a brand, you know?
Well, she's still got Tony Robinson in her head.
Then she grabs MJ's butt.
That was Jessica who went to Tony Robbins.
Excuse you.
Oh, it was Jessica.
I thought it was Morgan.
I am an oven.
I am an oven.
No, Morgan loves you, Tony Robbins.
She won't even go to the asking Robbins.
Call back.
So Mike comes finally and he's got flowers for everybody and Adam's like,
Roses, you know what happened last time somebody brought roses,
somebody got attacked by them right?
Oh, I have a phantom scratch.
Oh, it's like a phantom limb, you know, he feels the scratch, it like comes back on a full moon or something.
So stupid Adam.
So we got to see a flashback of that, which is my favorite, because I could just watch
that open over again, Gigi coming running out that door and like running into Adam and
oh, Gigi!
Just like how indignant he is about it.
You assaulted my husband. Just like how indignant he is about it
Yeah, so Mike gives roses to everyone which is weird and I was like, okay What am I to how did he fuck up? What should he be saying, you know?
So he's like I bring roses everyone because I want to show how much I care, you know like
Because like with friendships friendships are fragile like we love each other
But it's fragile and like you have to like bring out the best in people.
And like that's what I'm going to do because I'm basically going to ask them all for $10,000 after this.
Yeah, no kidding.
He's definitely coming for something.
And I love that Reza and my Kate Vita so much.
He gives us speech.
He turns his back right to Vita and stands right in front of her.
And he talks with the rest of the party.
Yeah. And so that's, that is so pimp.
That is so pimp that he brought us flowers.
These Riz's are so pimp, so pimp.
And so they're like,
Riz's are so yes.
He's a Mike, and a Mike's like,
but you know what Riz is, hold on,
I got a special gift for you.
Okay, hold on one second.
I got to make sure it came in.
We were having some issues at Mexico, so hold on one second.
So he goes back out to his car and he comes back with a little cat.
And Mike is like cro- Mike is the one that's crying.
He's like, I wanted to give you this cat because like, I love you.
It's like a brother and you need a cat.
His name is Woody.
I need him for you.
So you don't even get that privilege of naming your own cat.
His name is Woody.
Here. It's just like the week that I lose a pussy, I want you to gain one.
You know?
It only seems fair.
So, friends are like,
Oh my god!
What am I supposed to do?
Yeah!
He's like, cat, oh my god, oh my god.
And it's a Persian cat, you know, and videos like flat face flat face
Oh, those good cat flat face flat face
Oh
And then Adam's like
I know see here's a he's like until Adam
What does that what a horrible thing to do to somebody well as a cat person
What a horrible thing to do to somebody. Well, as a cat person,
I'm not a cat.
I mean, just a pet, something that's like alive in the U.S.
I know.
You don't do that.
Like, I'm assuming that Reza was talking about getting a new cat.
But I do agree.
I kind of feel like it should have been up to Reza to pick out his own cat.
Maybe there's a backstory.
Maybe they met this cat together or something and, and my god for him.
Because it is presumptuous.
Like, I think only parents can do that to children,
be like, surprise, here's an animal.
Yeah.
So Razz is like, Mike is an amazing guy.
Sometimes he doesn't get to the water alone,
but the thing is, he gets there eventually.
I mean, it's more like a puzzle,, like get to the puddle, you know?
Or like, you know when there's like a big swimming pool,
and then like you're in it and having fun, and then you splash,
and then the water goes outside the pool, and there's like a little bit of water
and the cement by the pool, mine gets to that water.
He doesn't realize there's a pool, but they get close to it.
Makes like that.
The water filter in the pool.
You know, he gets close to it, and then he gets stuck inside to it. Makes like that. The water filter in the pool. You know, he gets close to it,
and then he gets stuck inside of it. And then he's like, oh, and then of course I have to redesign
the pool filter, so Mike stops getting sucked into them. Like, we'll lead Mike to water,
but the problem is that like, he goes to like the gutter water and like, not the best water,
not the best. He doesn't like potable water. You can need a mic to water,
but you can't stop making him drink with us, EA.
You can leave mic to water,
but you can't stop him from fucking it.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Mic's like, oh yeah.
What?
I have this yeah water.
He's just like,
kind of terrain pipe.
He's like, yes.
So, I will say also, by the way, Adam, look at the enthusiasm that Reza has for a kitten and then look at the enthusiasm
He has for talking about babies and that's your answer right there. Yeah, pretty much yeah, you know
Look, it'll never talk. It'll never take my money out of my account
It'll never talk. It'll never take my money out of my account.
He'll never film a scene with Assa that I should have filmed.
Blanket, said Blanket ones.
So Nima is like, gee, gee, I'm insanely attracted to you. So you just want to fucking get over, get it over with.
This is my elevator pitch to you right now.
I have a lot of brands and I understand how brands can blow up and I want my brand
to be my penis and I want my market to be your vagina.
What do you think about that?
She's like, you are all talk, mister.
I'm like, you two are both boring, okay?
No one is buying this.
Yeah, exactly.
And Gigi is like, she's like I want to do whatever I want in the moment
If I want to fuck you in the moment, I'm gonna make that happen and res is like you're making him hard by saying these things
I'm like how are how is this conversation just happening poolside like right next to Vita?
And why isn't anybody gotten that ring?
Someone gets a ring literally a ring in a pool. Ah, you can tell everyone that this party has a job.
I would be in that pool in two seconds.
Is there like no net?
Is there no pool cleaning net that they can get that ring out?
Where they're just sitting there.
Just jump in there.
Yeah.
So, Ratsus is like, yeah.
You know, Chichi said a rough time
because that violent guy was a mess, you know, he was a disaster
And then we get another clip of Shalom just flipping off the camera and squawks you want this?
And he continues, but this guy, I mean, this guy's like the Persian point dexter
Okay, and everyone knows the little tang and a little dick and fix a lot of things
Well, not if it's a little tongue and a little dick.
Yeah, I wasn't sure who he was slamming with that.
It was just a general,
it was just a catch-all for his entire cast.
You knew that I'm here,
and I'll just insult all of you guys.
So now we go MJ and Vita then head down
to the flower district here in Los Angeles
to get their flowers for this wedding,
which will happen some point, whenever.
And I love, it's like, for some reasons, like, cold and rainy, I don't know how and why,
but Vita has her like, cool, right?
Because it's like summertime and all of a sudden it's like, middle winter when they shot
this scene.
Yeah, and MJ probably just had it set up so she could wear her might robe with the feather
collar.
Yeah, and Vita is like doing her marvelous mismasal look. She's like in like a sequined coat with a little hat in the back.
I loved it. And then of course, Vita, she's like, oh, it's warehouse him.
Like, I love that she's judging every little thing. And then she just walks through the whole thing going,
no, no, no go stupid to no rose no
Daisy no
So and so then the craft see and blue blue whatever ladies come out they're like
Um her name is make excuse me her name is Carly Cylinder
Carly Cylinder really?
I was like I've never met I've never heard of someone whose last name is Cylinder
Like I like it. I'm a Carly cylinder and here is my friend Joanne Rectangle.
Do not piss off Octobon. He's the best. Oh my god Tetrahedrin. So demanding.
Okay, way to end it.
This is kidding. Of course I have nothing to add to Tetrahedron.
Tetrahedron.
I don't even know what that is.
It's like a pyramid.
It's basically like a real housewives of Dallas.
Tiffany.
It's Tetrahedron.
Yeah, it's like Tiffany-Head-Andra.
No Tetrahedron is a square base that is a three-dimensional object, Ronnie.
Like as much like a cylinder is.
And it's like a square base.
And then like this point at the top, like it's pyramid with a square
base. I think now I'm paranoid that I got my
teacher heathies wrong. I'm like, well, this, Robbus? I was like, my eyes are
crossing. I was like, oh my god, it's learning. This is hard. Oh no, it's not your
heedron is only, it's a triangle, but it's all, it's just triangles. All trying a
pyramid made of triangles.
Well, there you go.
Everybody learned something today.
You guys, we learned it all.
It's called a tetrahedron,
because it has four faces.
I get it.
Ha.
So, I'm either swacking through this store,
like, I do what I want.
I am the boss.
My mother was the boss.
Who is the boss?
My mother was the boss.
I am like my mom. Boss. Boss. Boss. He's the boss was the boss my mother was the boss. I'm like my mom boss
Big boss big boss is ladies black. I'm up and they're like well enough course
We want to help you it's like kind of last minute but we're blueprint and crafty in one. Let's do it
Yeah, and the mom's like no no no no. Hey, did hate it. I hate it. Of course me to love it. Okay. I have my opinion
You know, I don't like I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, us. So basically they are and the ladies have learned finally to deal with Vita because
they're like, okay, thank you ladies for coming. We're going to make a very pretty arrangement,
but thank you for your opinions. Yeah, exactly. And then the episode draws
to an end with GG and Shervin riding in yet another car, the least do she of the cars we've seen from Shervin.
And they're just like driving to downtown and GG's like, we're like the only city where
downtown is not the main attraction.
And Shervin's like, ah, you're really an idiot aren't you?
So, come on, what other cities like, there's always Houston. I'm not sure if you're gonna get it. I'm not sure if you're gonna get it. I'm not sure if you're gonna get it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna get it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna get it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna get it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna get it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna get it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna get it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna get it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna get it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna get it.
I'm not sure if you're gonna get it. I'm not sure if you're gonna get it. the Bible verse on a big litus. Yeah, Hermas text max where I had like a
board, a Bortaco, which I really enjoyed.
And some K so look at that.
Houston downtown.
It's back.
So Gigi wakes up and she's like, I woke up,
or she said, I woke up today and decided today was the damn
getting to force because I've been working every day at
this business.
And this is not going to be the thing that he takes from me,
that little man.
He would not take it from me, that little shrimp.
Yeah.
It's like, damn.
Shrimp's not even kosher.
I mean, calling what you want,
but supposedly that ring is $100,000 or something thousand dollars.
So, you know, like have some respect.
G. Yeah, exactly.
This means that she's about to get a check
and she doesn't want to split it.
So she's finally motivated to get the divorce and Shervin's like yeah
But you have to at the very least like stop wearing that
That giant ring on your on your ring finger like wearing on a different finger. She's like
Fine and she puts on her index finger and then I two seconds later back on her ring finger like
I don't think she has to give back the ring at all. I think she should keep it and have fun with it, but
Like don't wear it on your ring finger though. Like you're not engaged and you're not married.
So new finger, new finger, new life.
I'm fear she was married for like five seconds.
Yeah, that's true.
They're all idiots.
Well, this was a fun win.
When is the season finale?
Do you think there's two episodes left?
It sounds like they're moving towards it
because next week is the night before the wedding. And I can't imagine the wedding not being the finale. Do you think there's two episodes left? It sounds like they're moving towards it because next week is the
night before the wedding. And I can't imagine the wedding not being
the finale. So I imagine, because we're about like episode 11.
So I think it's going to be like a thirching episode season.
Maybe maybe some reunion too.
Well, I hope so because we've got, oh, yeah, they'll probably have
three for this, this one. But they, I don't know how they're
going to fill that, but hey, they did it with Beverly Hills this
year. So you never know. Yeah. But a lot of shows are coming back for this this one, but they I don't know how they're going to fill that but hey, they did it with Beverly Hills this year
So you never know yeah, but a lot of shows are coming back on real housewives of at the end
Derrickville housewives of New Jersey. Yeah, we're about to get the big turnover
I hope you still got a full schedule here, so and you know what I watch an episode of welcome to Waverly and I actually really enjoyed it
I watched a final episode last night.
I didn't watch all of it.
I was boring, but I didn't see that.
I mean, it wasn't terrible that I was like,
it's weird because they have kind of boring people
going to the country.
Oh, well, they're like, oh my God,
I'm surprised all these country people
aren't completely horrible monsters.
Yeah, oh geez.
No, the episode that I saw,
the blonde chick got wasted and was like ridiculous
and awful. I was like, I was like mortified to be liberal. And then, um, and then they also
like, they castrated a bowl and they were like throwing around the testicles and like swinging
a pat like they were playing like baseball with bowl testicles and then they fed the testicles
to everyone. I was like, whoa, this show is like, I was like, wincing, I could not watch this screen.
It was like close-ups of bull testicles
that have been like snipped off the bull.
I was like, it was like, it was a very intense experience,
but I actually really, really enjoyed it.
And I was like, it was so nice to see a liberal city folk
portray as huge idiots. but what a boring one.
So we're very low energy idiots.
And then the last one, the girls like,
I feel really bad about how I yelled at everybody
and got drunk at that party.
So I'm gonna apologize.
And she goes in there, like some,
I think I hear someone and she's like,
it's me, the crazy drunk girl and the ladies like,
well, you know, I just felt for my friends
and stuff who was there. And I was like, oh my God, what a mess this girl is. What did
she do in the party? Does she just start telling everybody off?
She had already been drinking during the day. And then when they were driving over there,
she asked, is there going to be a Confederate flag at this place? And they're like, yeah, there will be.
But the lesbian loves this woman.
She's like, this is my home girl, whatever.
And she's like, well, I can't deal with a Confederate flag.
And then she's like, well, whatever, it's our host, and we're going to be gracious.
And whatever.
And even the black woman was like, she was just like, whatever.
Don't speak for me about this.
And so she started to get into like a tizzy
Like about the fact that there was a confederate flag, but she's like, okay fine
So she gets there and she's drunk and she's just being like an awful drunk like just someone you just don't want to be around and she's like
screaming I mean, let's get a fucking cocktail and there's like kids there and stuff
So finally she goes outside and she's like
Guess questions. She's like wasted. She's like doing that thing, what that drunk girl's doing with a like,
smacked her lips like, can I ask a question? So, uh, did you vote for her and like, Trump's like,
oh, okay, and then she just starts like asking it like, being like a really annoying drunk person.
Like, it was not a way to like, have a conversation where you're trying to like bridge the gap between
different viewpoints, et cetera, et cetera, as she was just basically scolding them being like,
okay, so you believe in hate, you believe in hate. It's like, oh, girl, that's not how you do it.
Like, you may believe that, but that's not how you have the conversation. So it was like, it was like
awkward because she was a, she was a messy drunk and then awkward because it's like oh you're being our you're being an ambassador for us right now in a certain sense and you're being terrible at it.
Yeah.
Oh, Lord.
Let's go on to the crap and mailbag shall we on that note?
Okay, sure.
So the crap and smell bag is where we solicit questions and comments from the audience. You can go to patreon.com slash watch or crap and if you support at the crap and smell
bag level or above, you can write in a question and we will answer it on the show. So we have a bunch of
questions. So I like this one from Michael Horn, one of our most avid mailbag
contributors. Michael Horn says, hi friends, please describe what you think and
please describe what you think an average day would be like for Ramona's assistant Pomona. Oh my god.
Poor Pomona. Poor Pomona. She probably has to go from the dry cleanest to the coffee shop
and then back to the dry cleanest to see if the stuff is done yet and then back to the coffee
shop to ask them why they didn't put enough ice and drink. You know it's like back and forth and Ramona's like you didn't do it right go back there yeah.
Whoa hi Pomona this is your boss Ramona singing.
Hi now that Neriya and I are back together what I need you to do is I need you to go to the
first dry cleaners and get his dry cleaning then go to the second one and get my dry cleaning
and then what I want you to do is when you're holding up both sets of dry cleaning, his
suit and my dress, which is of course in Ramona Blue, which I did not steal from anyone,
you hold up both dry cleaning bags and then make the bags make out with each other so
you can see what a real relationship is.
Thank you so much, Pomona.
Hey Pomona, okay, tell me the God-honest truth.
I'm standing right here next to somebody.
Which one is Avery?
Which one is me?
Wrong, wrong, wrong.
Okay, which one is just gotten out of college?
Which one is me?
Wrong, wrong, wrong.
Fine.
Whoa, all right, hey.
Whoa, Pom one, five. Whoa, all right. Hey. Whoa, Pomona.
Here.
I want you to take this role of Kodak Advantage film and get it to develop.
I just took 36 selfies of me and Avery.
I wouldn't take it more, but you can only take 36 photos.
But I took a piano and a ceramic one and I took a square one and I took a normal sized
one because I want to take food, vantage my Kod one and I took a normal sized one because I wanna take food, I can't take a fianc, okay?
I, what else is in there?
Catherine says,
Can Rani please do an impression
of his mom watching Game of Thrones,
preferably drunk and playing Kanasta?
I should make her watch it when I'm back there.
I wonder if it's gonna be on mobile back in Texas.
Yeah.
She'd probably be like, oh Jesus, now I have to look at some boobs.
Oh great.
Could you not write anything?
Could you not write anything?
That's your favorite thing to do.
She gets so mad at like boobs on TV or like when people have sex.
She's like, oh, can we get back to somebody getting beheaded?
I mean, that was good.
That was good. Yeah, I can do impersonation of my mom watching Game of Thrones
I remember like five years ago or six years ago whenever it first came out
I guess probably seven years ago. I remember I was home
For like Passover or something and I was in my bedroom and my parents were watching Game of Thrones in their room
And it was the the TV was so loud and it was this it was like my parents were watching Game of Thrones in their room and the
TV was so loud and it was like a season finale of season one.
And all I heard was all this noise.
There's a whole thing with a fire and there's a fire, fire, fire, fire, and there's all this
noise, whew, whew, whew, whew, whew, whew, whew, whew, whew, whew, whew, whew, whew,
and then after the fire settles, like some dragons, there's a dragon moment and so you hear
this whee, whee, whee, whew, whew, whew, whew, whew. So it's like all these noises and then you hear this, wee wee wee wee wee wee wee wee.
So it's like all these noises,
and then it's like silent for one second,
and then mom just goes,
this is a weird show.
That's all my mom says.
One last question,
I like this one because it's super meta.
Daffy1227 says,
what podcasts were these questions answered?
This one. All of them and none of them.
It's right now and right never.
They did them on dumb gay politics.
Daffy, unfortunately, we don't know which questions were answered on which podcasts, but it's always gonna be,
it's almost always our Friday episodes.
So that's a good place to look.
I guess the daffy, oh yeah, daffy.
Oh, daffy actually has two other questions
and she's probably like, when are you gonna answer my questions?
So of course, so of course I answer the question
about when we're gonna answer her questions
before we actually address her questions.
Okay, daffy, this is just for you.
We'll do the first one and we'll do another one next week or after that.
Ronnie Ben, you've been chosen to direct the musical The Wiz with the cast from Real House
Wise of Atlanta.
Sorry, you can't afford candy.
Who gets which role?
The Witches, Tin Man, The Lion, Scarcro, The Wiz, Dorothy and Toto. Oh my God. I love that she knows our budget. Yeah, we can't afford candy
bears. Um, well, not only seeing the wiz once and I saw the NBC version. I haven't
actually seen the original one much to my boyfriend's this May. So this may be
a little tricky for me. Well, I think that Dorothy should be Cynthia because it's like kind of a boring part.
Right. You know, like she just kind of walks around and you're like, oh my god, like the best
thing about her, her hair and her shoes. I would make an argument that Dorothy could also be
confused because she's just like, I just want to go back to Carpool. Oh, how much longer does this,
this, this, this, this road go? She gets canceled halfway down the road.
Maybe she's one of the... maybe she's like Linda the Good Witch or something like that.
She just sort of like comes in, says something cheerful, and then she's gone.
Okay, and then the scarecrow would be...
Who's a frady pants on that?
I had none of these people afraid.
That's the thing.
They're all just...
Yeah, let's just make him feel the one woman the just, yeah, let's just make Kim feel the scary.
Oh, if I only had a carpool.
Wait, so it's Kim feels, Kim feels a scary crow.
Not the good witch. Right. Yeah. Okay. Okay, so then the tin man, the heartless one would be, um, Kim,
Kim, I think Fager would have to make an argument for Kim because Kim looks like she's made
of synthetic parts at this point. Like she looks like she may have come from a factory.
Okay. And she is fairly heartless. Except none of it's made out of tin.
It's all like rubber.
That's true.
Okay, she could be the rubber band.
She could just be one of those deadly poppy plants or something.
And they finally give her a heart, but there's no word to fit, because her chest cavities
are already full.
She takes the heart and gets it surgically enhanced.
She injects the heart with cement or rubber cement.
I'm gonna say the line would be nini.
It's all like growls and screams,
but then the minute you talk back to it,
it's like, yeah.
Like a victim.
Yeah.
And then the whiz, is that like Peter?
Like Peter's brew.
Like acting like he's like so amazing.
And I know, somebody's just a guy behind the curtain
full of bullshit.
Peter's brew.
I'm whizzing up some Peter's brew.
Welcome to the made it to the emerald city.
And this is like, Peter's brew. Yeah, it's on the, you know, what's on the real freeway tunnel.
We just got an exclusive deal with Emerald City.
Bar one, exclusively in Emerald City.
Do they call it the Emerald City in the West?
I don't know, I don't remember.
Okay.
And then in, so who's Glenda the Good Witch?
Weirdy said Cam, right?
No, someone else.
Glenda, that could be, uh, uh, Porsche maybe?
Glenda comes in and works.
Yeah, Porsche.
She'll be like,
Okay, stay on that yellow brick road,
and eventually you can earn enough to get one of my new thongs that I'm selling. Yeah. And then the wicked witch would be, uh, for sure. Yeah, that
house under your ass, okay. Yeah, Kenya. Yeah, she's like her house is kind of underground.
So it's natural that she's like kind of underwear most houses would be naturally. Yeah.
She lays down. And Marlow is like one of the munchkins,
like just trying to break out of the pack,
but just is still gonna be left back in the munchkin town.
Yeah.
Probably enough, she does not read as a munchkin,
but she has the spirit of a munchkin.
Yeah, she does, and really big heels.
All right, well that brings us
to the end of an FB there, buddy!
Yeah, everyone, thank you for listening.
We got official word that the general tickets for Charleston have actually fully sold out.
So there's only a few tickets left over the FB ones.
The FB comes with a meet and greet y'all and preferred seating, so hey, it's a good deal.
Well, it depends, I guess, what you think about it.
But anyway, we have a wonderful weekend, everyone.
We'll be back on Monday to talk some merit to medicine and have a great one, y'all.
Bye.
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