Watch What Crappens - Shahs: When People Stop Being Polite and Start Getting Israel
Episode Date: August 1, 2017Reza and Mike want the gang to go to Israel, but not before throwing a totally embarrassing "Peace in the Middle East" Halloween party. We have all the "Shahs of Sunset" cringeworthy moments... from the costumes to the ovulation sticks. Come listen! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts!
It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates.
Cameras off! Voice only!
Launching during Pride!
Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes,
Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few.
Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts.
This episode of Watch for Crappens is brought to you by our Patreon,
Premium Sponsors, Christy D'Auerty, Mia Hansenaloha, Cindy Gerson, This episode of Watch For Crappens is brought to you by our Patreon premium sponsors
Kristi Dauerty, Mia Hansen Aloha, Cindy Gerson, Kelly the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the heavens, to the Kids, what happens when there's so much that happens?
To talk to other crapens listeners about the shows as they air, come over to Facebook.com
slash watch what crap ends.
And to follow us on social media, go to watchacrapens.com to find all our social media links.
And for our bonus episodes and all of our extras, come over and be a premium member over at patreon.com
slash watch what crap ends that's patreon.com slash watch what crap ends, that's patreon.com slash watch what crap ends.
Hey everyone, welcome to watch what crap ends, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to watch.
I'm Ben Mandelker from beside blog.com and the Bantra Blender podcast, joining me as usual on this lovely Monday morning
is the wonderful and hilarious and very, very talented.
Ronnie Carrom from trashocktv.com and the Rose Pricks Bachelorette podcast.
What is up, Ronnie?
You're such a sweet heart.
Oh, you know what I'm just, it's just I'm feeling happy right now.
I'm feeling happy as a little clam.
Me too.
Well, go figure, we're both in a great mood.
There are two, two happy clams. Two happy clams in a pod.
Oh no, I mixed my metaphors.
Well, we say we're having a great Monday.
We ain't just lying to be positive.
That's right.
We are really having a great Monday.
You know, it's the top of the show.
It's the top of the week.
So as customary, I have to, of course, push our live show
on September 2nd.
People, go buy your tickets.
It's really important to us, but even more importantly,
it's going to be super fun for you.
We're hoping to have some announcements about the show this
week, maybe next week.
We'll see some cool stuff.
Just trust us.
You're going to want to get a ticket for this.
So you go to watchacrapins.com.
And the link is right there to ticket master for for the show is downtown Los Angeles
it's our peace in the middle of the show it's our peace yet we promise to
dress in really offensive stereotypes of Jewish people in arab's every it'll
be really great
we will offend everybody for a bad yeah also pregnant
yeah um
it'll be super great and we'll have hang lambs for no good reason and
It'll be great. It'll be a perfect way to celebrate our show. No, it's gonna be super fun. We are planning
Some cool stuff. We're gonna. Can I say about the pub crawl? Can I talk about the pub crawl for a second or no?
Can I say about the pub crawl? Can I talk about the pub crawl for a second? Or no.
Um, I don't know. You go for it. I mean, as much as you know, I mean, we don't know anything, but our intent,
because we're a very transparent podcast. Our intent is to go on a pub crawl with, uh,
with people who come to the show, not everyone. It's gonna be like something.
We're gonna do something like the first 50 or 100. I don't know what it is.
We're gonna figure it out, but we're gonna do something like the first 50 or 100, I don't know what it is. We're gonna figure it out,
but we're gonna, we wanna make this,
this live show a full weekend experience.
So, so y'all,
point is it's gonna be really fun.
It's like, I'm tellin' ya.
Yeah, yeah, it's gonna be fun.
All right, well let's get into some shots of sunset.
Shall we be in?
Yeah, let's do it.
Let's just dive right into this mess.
Yes, this is a huge mess.
It's only episode three.
These people come into this show so willing to just
ruin each other.
Always.
And everything around them.
And, you know, after six years, you got to kind of
respect it.
And what was nice about this episode was that they said,
you know, we're so used to ruining each other.
Why don't we go after each other's cultures and
backgrounds and countries? Let's do that.
Yeah. Maybe we can finally get that word solved by having everybody just start bombing each other after they see this episode
Yeah, let's do that and then for just for added cakes shits and giggles. Let's just you know listen to MJP
Oh God, that's the word. Yeah, is this is this episode gross enough?
Hey guys, could you put MJ in a really small top and have her piss on camera?
Great. That's great. Yeah, great. Add that to the soup.
It's a high point for Bravo. Yeah. Well, you know, even even the previously's on the show or hilarious.
I won't go into all because I felt like I was writing some kind of high coup. You pregnant. It's my baby in my life.
because I felt like I was writing some kind of high coup. You pregnant.
It's my baby in my life.
That's sick.
And then I just wrote no respect of women dancers.
But I like a few lines.
And also, I've been seeing Shalom for a while now.
But I really love that they showed the clip of her and Reza having a very meaningful apology and reuniting session
With Gigi's new boobs just hanging out of her shirt
It's just nothing makes sense on this show. No, nothing the only thing that does make sense is that
They will always have a huge fight that will last all season and the beginning of next season it will all be squashed
a huge fight that will last all season. And the beginning of next season, it will all be squashed.
Yeah.
And the editors on this show are very consistent.
Like they do the Bravo thing where they're like,
look, now people are bike riding in Hollywood.
Now people are going up an elevator,
but there's always like a woman shoving a giant,
fork full of chicken in her mouth.
The most unflattering shot of extras even.
Well, to be fair, that is a common sight here in her mouth. The most unflattering shot of extra even. Well, to be fair, that
is a common sight here in Los Angeles. Just that excessive chicken eating. You know, this
is a city that's known for its health food and its burgers, but what people don't realize
is that the real culprit are ladies eating chicken on the sidewalk. That poultry. That
poultry game be strong. Yeah. Yes. The next chicken
run film is going to take place in Los Angeles and the villains will all be skinny white ladies
in Pilates class or CrossFit class. And we'll Mel Gibson provide a voice again.
I think you will. Well, that's a good one to bring up. Blimey the Jews for everything. I was
going to say I feel like he probably would get excited by the mention of this.
Yeah, it's actually a perfect lead-in to this episode.
It reserun.
Yeah.
We have to get out of this chicken coop.
Everybody trust me.
He's the only one who ever makes it out alive in every chicken run movie.
That's so chicken.
And he's always fatter than ever.
He ate all the other chickens.
Chickens be like clock clock and I'm like,
bitch, be like gobble gobble.
What are you with turkey?
Mike.
And then there's that's so white chicken.
I'd be like dark meat, you know?
But Mike be like, buck, buck, buck, buck, buck buck buck like I get it Mike. He's just like a dirty bird
So we open at a restaurant fitting for this cast it has picnic tables
Like that anywhere they shoot now. They're like please sit outside
By the trail we'll give you chicken so you can fit in.
So Mike is now just coming into every scene
with a new full face of makeup.
I don't know if he thinks he's Adam Lambert or what,
but he's really going for it this season.
I was gonna go more Chris Angel, but without the magic.
Well, he's Adam Lambert without the magic too.
So we're basically on the same page. Yeah make up made up overly made up
Man faces with no magic. It's just looking rough rough very rough. Yeah, so they're having lunch and
Rens is like
Important call
Okay, team mobile
It's my bitch Taylor. We're going to go look at a house and not remake it.
It might get a year of minor.
We're going to flip the house by not redoing anything in it
and just selling it for more money.
We're going to look at an iPad.
So, a little year is mine and hours call back
for the three people who watch that with us.
Yes, thank you.
So, Mike comes and they're ordering.
And look, we all love a good
shot of ordering session. It's like, what are the egg rolls and hamburgers, the sliders,
the freedom fries? What else burritos?
She's coming. She likes fattening shit. Mike's like, she's too fat, man. We've got to order
you know, like a lettuce wrap. MJ can have that. MJ can't have that. Get the case of Dia instead. Don't get to the breito. She can't have the breito.
Yeah, she's not gonna eat that and I love MJ's violent reaction to it. She like looks
at a lettuce wrap and she's like, I don't eat like burritos or whatever that thing is.
No. I was just happy to see people inside for telecafe that's one of those cafes
I I see on the I've driven by it a million times for the past five years
I've never seen a single person going and never heard of a single person going in I'm I'd be even surprised that they have one
Yelp review so good for for telecafe finally getting some customers
Well, maybe so I was felt like it was just time to put the last nail in the car
So I was just like, it was just time to put the last nail on the collar. Yeah, I think so. That's so good. I think so, the shavs curse. So, uh, Resus like, dude, I'm so hungover.
Hey, you want to go to Israel?
Like, Jewish-ness.
That's the thing, right?
It's so Jewish.
He's like, I really connected the Jewish side of my family because, you know, I think
Shabbat is beautiful.
Like, it's called Shah and it's got bots in them,
and that's just like a beautiful two syllables right there.
That's so Persian, but Jewish.
Mike's like, with Ash Shabbat, I would have nothing.
Like, without it, I've been in, have you ever been to Israel?
Huh?
Like, I love the casual, the overly casual way they're trying to get into this.
I know.
They've just been thinking, you know,
Jewishness.
Love Jews.
I'm kind of Jewish.
No, like I'm seriously Jewish.
Like really Jewish.
He's like, look, there's a synagogue over there.
That's good, Israel.
And Mike is, Mike is, he's like, yeah man, growing up,
I was like a wild child, but like Shabbat kept me in line.
So like without it, without Shabbat,
like I would have been a complete nutcase.
I'm like, are you considered someone
who's together right now?
Like, let's say you had a wife for a second,
but you cheated on her.
You were a realtor and you couldn't make that work.
You've got a boss and you put your face inside a boss
and that didn't lead to anything.
And then you got into the shoe business
that didn't work into anything.
And now you have a moving company,
which admittedly I think is your best decision yet.
But are you really, do you have your shirt together?
Did Shabbat really help you?
I think Shabbat's trying to tell you,
you're not gonna be happy until you have a leaf blower
in your hand.
I think Shabbat's what people do on Shabbat,
but I have a feeling that's where your life is going.
So just get used to it.
I think Shabbat is trying to send him
a very literal message, like literally give it a rest mic.
Just give it a rest. Shabbat is trying to send him a very literal message, like literally give it a rest mic. Just give it a rest. Shabbat year round. You need to be on like a week-long
Shabbat situation, okay? He's like, you know, it's so important to me and I haven't seen
my family in Israel for 10 years, you know? And it's different, like you really understand
what's important. Also, I want to know what they think of my new makeup, you know, they haven't seen me like this.
And then in Resa, he's like,
yeah, it's the high holidays,
and I'm feeling very Jewish, she lately.
Says the guy who later on,
throws the most ridiculous party in this show's history.
And Mike's like, oh man, you gotta go to Israel
because the spiritual
dopeness of it is dope.
And I was like, yeah, I want to be closer to Judaism.
And then in walks MJ, I'm like, oh, here we go.
The epitome of spirituality, it's MJ.
Like seriously, MJ, do you know how Jewish I am?
Like, I like bargains.
I have hair in my ears I listen to Barbara Shraza and
win Adams around.
Come here and do see how some what a great show.
I liked Seinfeld but I connected on a deeper level.
His list of reasons why he's a good Jew were so embarrassing.
I was so embarrassed for him.
It was sort of embarrassing.
As a Jew, I just said it was a little embarrassing.
I have to say MJ arrived to the Shahz Orchestra playing a very sad clarinet.
Just deciding to go with the Jewish theme.
They're like, let's have a little ode to Woody Allen.
Let's have some light chlesmer on this soundtrack as your eyes.
It was kind of
Peter and the you know, Peter and the half. Yeah, it's like Peter and Peter and the world
That was actually resa doing Peter in the mouth.
That's so cool.
This is MJ, MJ looking at a lettuce wrap theme.
Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop,
hello, this is me, a Bill de Blasio, speaking.
Oh my goodness.
Yeah, so she shows up and she doesn't want her burrito and
it's like, no, have it. It's fresh like a flower.
Which shoes love, which I know because I'm Jewish. She's like whatever.
She's like, Israel, I can't because my dad is sick. And they're like,
you need a party. Okay, let's face it
You need time away from Tommy the screamer your mother the terrorist your dad the guy with the stroke
That's no fun you need the party
She's like okay, I'm in yeah, I was like actually MJ
I actually feel like your excuse was pretty solid about your dad. That was a good excuse like that was
I actually feel like your excuse was pretty solid about your dad. That was a good excuse like that was
A legitimate reason why you could not go to Israel, but okay. I guess partying is is important to
Yeah, she's like I'm just such a good person all the time. I need to give myself a break
And I like how they were arguing
What's his face Mike is like yeah, you know, you're so sad
Like I look at you. You're like so sad. You don't even know what you're doing anymore. It's like, yeah, you're pathetic. Like in this crazy relationship, no one gets your boyfriend. Your mom hates you.
You're dead, Stuy. You just get a little boy named Peter. I mean, look at you. You don't
even fit in that outfit. It's like Jesus, you guys. It's like, okay, guys, thanks for being
such good friends. It's like they have great chocolate quesan's there. So they're like
make it love. Make it love. To be fair, Resa knew more words in that song than I know.
Cause I can only get to have a na gila have a na gila and then I'm done. But he actually
knew the next few words.
I was like, okay.
Probably things that shit at karaoke,
just so he can be the most juiwun there.
You know, like, look at me, I'm juiwish.
I will sing Nagi Lahav about it.
Duet Tradal, Duet Tradal song.
So then we go over to Venice, Venice Beach, I should say, where Asa is walking down Abakini
where her new boutique is.
Now for those of you who don't live in the area, Abakini is prime, prime, prime real estate.
It's one of the hottest streets in LA.
I am shocked that she has a boutique there.
Although to be fair, it sounds
like she has a corner of a boutique of like someone's larger boutique. You know, she's
like, babe, it's like, it's like three storefronts, but like, babe, this is my section. I'm
like, okay, so it's probably someone else's and she has a section because there's no way
that-
There's no way that-
Basically a dollar tree that she's going to have a raccan, hopefully, because 15
grand a month, there's no way that acaf dance can afford to be on
on apikini. I'm sorry. Well, that's, you know, that's awesome though. She's like, you know,
it's my responsibility because in our culture, we take care of our parents, which is why I'm
going to blow through their savings in one month, trying to open the store that's going to close
and lose everything. Yeah, unless it's getting a collection injection, injection from the Jackson
family, I just don't see how that is saying. And she has to start every scene like this
this year. She goes, my family, my business is booming. And so is my family. If you had
a notice, yes, we know that your pregnant, we know that you're booming. Your belly is
booming. We get a week baby boom. We've seen the movie is 30 years ago. We're done
Both sides of your ass have been pregnant for six years. Okay. No one the surprise
Yeah, we get it. Asa your pregnant so she's in her her store for a and of course
The big the big the big takeaway from the scene is meeting Asa's landlord, Mona, who is really not that
out of line for a typical Venice local, but Mona is basically a wacky transgender lady
who, how do you even describe Mona?
How do you describe?
Mona isn't even transgender.
Mona is just some old drunk homeless person who wears tutus and wears wig.
Like a leftover Katy Perry tribute band wig.
Yeah, I can't tell if Mona's being ironic
about the current state of the world
or if she just drunk.
I don't know what's happening, but nothing good.
Like, hey, I'm those fellows.
You're like, well, watch your step.
You know, we have to worry about that with the baby.
It's like, I have to sue myself.
Ah!
And then Tommy is probably like Tommy's mom.
Exactly.
And then Mona, you know, shows her in a fashion innovation,
which is, it lashes on her nipples.
Oh my god.
Take a look at this.
Like, oh, I don't know.
Between the, between the rod and tea, you know, he's really
himself.
I'm like, well, you're saying himself a lot in him, which
means you don't really respect her.
OK, awesome.
Babe, babe, he's pregnant.
Yeah, between the rod and teeth and the excessive sun
damage and that hooker choker, I don't know.
I mean, I, I don't know whether to praise Mona or look the other way.
It's there's a whole lot going on, a lot of conflict, but I think in the end of I settle in, you know, Mona, you do you.
You do you, Mona.
Yeah, please don't do anybody else, Mona.
Okay.
Yes.
Don't do anybody else.
So I was like, I'm gonna burn some sage babe. Mona's like, God, it's like a burning vagina. Good one, Mona.
And Austin goes exactly.
What?
And Austin says,
the Coastal Commission is taking forever
to give me a permit, you know?
So I hope they walk in here to inspect
while I'm starting a fire with drive leaves.
This is the story that I don't own at all.
And then she twirls around.
Yeah, I should like, yeah, babe,
the Coastal Commission is like babe, so I'm gonna go ahead and do it. I'm starting a fire with drive leaves. This is the store that I don't own at all. And the sheets were also around.
Yeah, she's like, yeah, babe, the Coastal Commission is like,
babe, so takes so long.
I mean, this rate, I think I'm going to have this baby before I get my permit
because I'm pregnant, babe.
You know, I'm pregnant.
Do we tell the cops?
Things kind of don't get pregnant.
You get pregnant, am I right?
Because here I am, pregnant.
We know.
You and Moana is like, God dammit, you're a crazy lady.
You're making me look normal.
I do appreciate Asa's family being cool with Moana.
I actually do appreciate that.
They weren't weirded out.
They weren't cut away as to them being like,
who is this person?
You know, they were cool.
And I actually do.
Well, I have a daughter who walks around in a burka made of like
gold chains.
Yeah.
It's not for me.
Like who bury like $10,000 worth of diamonds
under her front stoop.
I'm told America.
Yeah.
I actually really like Ossos family a lot.
And I feel like they will eventually get their own TV
land sitcom.
And I'm looking forward to it.
Yeah, that's a spin off, I think we could watch.
Yeah, I could watch that.
I could watch it.
So speaking of family, we then go over to Gigi and her mom,
Fatima, as they go visit a designer named Eric,
like Eric Wizzetti or something like that.
So, how they show there.
I really like the chemistry of the mom and the daughter
because Gigi fucking crazy.
Yeah. And the mom is just such because Gigi fucking crazy. Yeah.
And the mom is just such a sweet heart.
And they're in this parking garage
and looking around for the door
and they're walking towards the elevator.
And the mom's like, is it there?
I just love that.
I just love mom questions in a parking garage.
Like, what is it that?
Yes, it's that.
It's the gleaming elevator.
It's just gonna take you.
But I wouldn't want to be behind her
when she has to get out of the garage.
Which side does this go on this way?
This way? I turn it around?
No. Upside down?
No. This way?
This way? I need help.
It says insert credit card.
Okay. I mean, so you can take out this way?
No, this way? the parking garage. Yeah,
that's when the line builds up a target. And you're like, God damn it. Been there
so many times. Yeah, so GG, so they were there at this fashion designer's
studio or whatever because GG's gonna be walking in a fashion show, which makes
me question the merits of the fashion show, but you know, yeah, it's an LA you know that they're like oh my god because this is gonna be
for fashion week so by the way LA fashion week that's not like real like it's not yeah is this
for like boba tea like the thirst thirst temperatures yeah yeah like is this the red bull line
because this guy Eric was at.
He's like, I'm South. South fashion week.
Are you stuck?
Side of trucking in the show.
She's like, uh, you know, people say if you give out to the,
if you could give out good to the universe, then the universe will give you
good back.
And this is like proof.
No, it is not.
This is proof that being a good person is not necessary to have tons of money
and tons of luck.
Yeah, absolutely.
It just means that you have a social media following
and he wants you to be honest.
We can get free publicity.
That's all that that means.
And by the way, I looked at his Instagram channel
or profile and all the photos are of this designer.
There's nothing of his designs on there.
I was like, great, okay.
So she is gonna be modeling this really awful,
awful frock.
It's this silvery, shiny, super cheap looking material
that's like baggy up top, so it makes her look fat up top,
which she's not, but it makes her look baggy
because it looks like a big old like popcorn bag that's exploded.
It's like the opening scene of scream has happened and she's in it and then the bottom
of it, like these little shorts and it just, it looks horrendous.
It's all these like raw stress for less romper things that he's trying to do.
Yes.
And we've been seeing them everywhere anyway, so there's nothing original and it's ugly,
which is, you know, it's like a double wavy basically. And then you can tell his phony when he's teaching
her what to do. He's like, one thing every model does wrong as block the model. So here's
how you do it. And then he starts walking for her. And I'm like, no, this is just a boy
who dreamed of being a super model. It's like the community theater director who's like, that's not how you play Jack. This is how you play Jack. And then he like gets up
on your Milky White cow. Like get the fuck out of here. Cast yourself if you want to
do it. You'll be far. It's, you know, it's, it, um, to me, it felt like a fashion show
or like a fashion line from one of those cheesy ass stores that's on
Melrose Avenue. You know, people are always like, oh, they're shopping on Melrose, it's
so great. It's actually, I mean, it's fun to walk down Melrose, but there are a bunch of
cheesy ass stores. I mean, anyone who remembers Euros of Hollywood, a fabulous Bravo show
I might add. Those guys all had stores on Melrose, and that just shows what it was just like weird shiny tacky
Yes stuff. We're like who who who wears this and also name is MJ her name is MJ
MJ GG and then who's the other one who's really like Mel Rosie?
I forgot I'll come up with the later. I think of it later. It'll hit me later
Oh damn it. I forgot. I'm a bliona bliona
hit me later. Oh damn it. I forgot my name. Bliona. Bliona. Bliona. Yeah. So, Bliona.
Those types. So, look at Paul on Big Brother.
Little, little ninja Paul. That's the guy with the store on Melrose.
He's like, yeah, I'm wearing a sleeveless vest with fur around the collar.
Like, uh, and shorts. Yeah. And Nisa.
Please, like, Paul, I cannot stand Paul. I cannot stand Paul I cannot stand Paul
This is a little aside, but I was worried that everyone would be rooting for Paul and I'm starting to secretly root for Cody and
Jessica even though they're awful. I'm still rooting for them and I tweeted out saying is it weird that I'm rooting for them
And turns out a lot of people are rooting for them and I they've somehow become the fan favorites
Yeah, we're gonna have to talk about that on the
somehow become the fan favorites. Yeah, we're going to have to talk about that on the
buzz.
We got a lot of big brother rage.
We have a lot to let out.
It's going to be huge.
Okay, so also in the scene, I like when Gigi's mom started making adjustments on the shorts
because the thing is that her adjustments were correct.
Yeah, she's like, this sort need to be hired like this.
She's like, mom, you're dissing the design and he goes, no, no, we can't do that because that's Beyonce.
Has to be longer to avoid loss. So it's even if it's gross. Like, you're such a rip off.
Yeah, it shouldn't look so close to Beyonce that of one inch would get you a copyright infringement.
Yeah, this guy is basically just ripping off everything really badly and putting it out there.
Now, he doesn't even fit the models.
Later in the show, he switches her outfit and he goes,
do you want to try this on?
She's like, no, no, it's fine.
He's like, okay.
Hello.
It was actually, I think it was actually for the best,
because honestly, the way that thing hung on Gigi,
she looked like Fricking Balloon Boy.
Remember Balloon Boy?
Remember that balloon? That's what she looked like a freaking balloon boy. Remember a balloon boy? Remember that balloon?
That's what she looked like.
Bubble boy.
No, it wasn't, no, it was balloon boy.
Remember when there was that hoax,
the most amazing hoax of our lifetime,
when there was like a three year old boy
who was caught in a balloon that was flying over the country?
Oh my God, yes.
And he was like hiding in the attic.
Yeah, the whole thing was that he had jumped
into a weather balloon and it took off.
And then everyone was tracking it.
And like the entire country came to a halt
about like what's gonna happen?
How do they save him?
And then turns out he was just in the garage.
And then he threw up on the today's show.
Really?
That is so me as a child
if I ever had the opportunity.
That was me.
Like my mom used, she used to be terrified
of the kids getting kidnapped, you know,
because there were all these things back then.
Like the search for Adam, like all these TV
and these back kidnapped kids.
So I would hide in the mall.
So just watch my mom freak out.
Like I was an evil, evil little bastard.
If I had seen a hot air balloon,
I would have jumped in that thing in two seconds.
The stories from your childhood never cease to amaze me. Never.
I my stories are like my mom told me to clean my room so I clean my room.
They are not your stories you're always good they're just normal to you.
We just grew up differently. No I was very obedient. I still am very obedient.
So all my stories there's nothing there's no fun arc to my stories.
It's like, I went to my friend's house.
And we both was just like, you in every situation.
Yeah.
So anyway, we then go over to Reza, who's now at a prop house, and I don't know if you
noticed this, but the guy behind, the guy who was working there, he's like, hi, how are
you?
And Reza goes, I'll take it.
And then he goes, ha ha ha ha ha ha. I was like, hi, how are you? And Resa goes, I'll take it. And he goes, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
I was like, okay, calm down.
I like that kind of awkwardness
between the straight worker and Resa.
Because he's like, has it go in boss? And Resa's like, ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. It's kind of a costume store, but real,
it's like a prop, real like costume jewelry.
Yeah, it's like a prop store.
Yeah, and here in L.A. since the film industry,
film and TV industry is here,
we have like very legit prop houses and costume stores
where it's discards from actual movies.
So you can really do it up here.
Yeah.
Are they drilling something across?
Yeah, you know what's happening? What's happening? Is the building next door? I'm going to open my blinds so I can narrate
the building next door the ground level apartment. They're installing a fence and they're drilling
they're drilling it into concrete. So I apologize. There's nothing I can do. It sounds like there's a bug.
Oh no, I'm not complaining.
I just like to point it out so that people are like,
do they even hear that?
Yeah.
So they know that yes, we hear it.
We record this just talking on the phone,
it's different.
Yeah, I'm always curious what it is,
because it's always a good story of the thing.
But it's always something different.
There's like, there's ceaseless drilling over here.
I feel like ever since MJ left the neighborhood,
all the workmen are like time to drill
They're like let's board it up so she can't get back in boys and girls
Exactly
So anyway, so res is having his peace in the Middle East party
And I wanted to be Jewish and terrorist and you know little kids getting run down in the street. And I was like, well, well,
this is really getting dark very quickly.
Basically, pissing them at least.
It's like okay.
And he does this whole spiel about how,
we're so low over the map,
because you know, you have Assa,
who's like, Mrs. Muslin, me Muslin,
but she's pregnant and not married and getting a black man.
And then you got Shervin, who's just like,
Muslin, he pre-laced a drink incley, but he likes to drink and he's Muslim
and I'm half Jewish and half Muslim, but I'm also gay.
And Mike is super Jewish, he's totally responsible.
And I don't think he's gonna be successful,
which is not very Jewish.
And he's basically going on about how,
you know, they are all sorts of like,
they're almost paradoxical in their nature
and they're defying the stereotypes.
So naturally, what does he do to celebrate that?
He has a party that celebrates stereotypes of both cultures.
I don't really understand this.
But basically, everything that he's describing, it's called being American.
Yeah.
Or he's like, yeah, well, especially, especially American, because because it's like we must learn but we make
out with other dudes and it's like first generation American, you know, we come from other
countries and then we become Americans where we can do what we want to do, you know.
Yeah, exactly.
So you go girl, how about having a fourth of July party?
Yeah, still keeps the Jew in there, but now you can celebrate with hot dogs and hamburgers
and some good old fashioned fireworks and learn to appreciate your country. Yeah.
Yeah. Hugs. So then Destiny, the new cast member,
formerly of the People's Couch comes and joins Reza because she's a party planner. So that's why
she's here to help them out. And Reza, he already knows this party is a bad idea and you can tell it because he's
sort of doing a pre-spin on it.
He's like, you know, I'm making fun of the most painful aspects of my life, you know,
because I've got two cultures and I'm not always accepted in them.
So really, I'm just making fun of my pain.
I'm like, don't wrap this up in some bullshit of you're embracing the things that have tormented you
You're just having a stupid party. That's what you have. Yeah, because even the stuff he's listening is so horrible
He's like in this world kids get blown up ripped a shreds from bombs
Families die. So how do I deal? I make fun of it. It's not your life. Yeah, you're making fun of
Yeah, that's the thing that he doesn't seem get. When he says he's making fun of the most
depressing parts of his life,
it isn't your life.
Yeah, exactly.
And then he's like, all right, so,
oh, let's get a hookah and a menorah.
I'm like, you know,
Menors are only on Hanukkah.
It's not like Jews walk around carrying menorah
is everywhere.
I mean, it's just,
it's one of those things where I wasn't personally offended.
I just was like, it's stupid.
I'm just that I was more offended by how tone deaf it all was.
Like, what were you thinking about what you were doing?
I'm offended for you as a smart human being doing just stupid shit, you know?
They have a suicide pass!
Yeah, I was like, Reza.
No, no, don't do that.
He was like, look, guns, bullets.
Yeah, she's making a list. She's like okay
Some skin she some cocaine kilos the baby bomb vest Ft set what else?
Yeah, exactly like like have like watch what happens when you have a noise complaint and you all get shot down
With your fake like literally you're gonna be there with your like your fake guns and your kilos and
Everything and the cops are come for a noise complaint and they're gonna see all those and you're just gonna be done
You're done. Yeah, those helicopters are above you or not a miss icon remake. Okay. They're like coming to get you fuckers
Oh, that's too bad because I was gonna invite Leia Salonga
so
So she's yeah, he's basically like, well, we were speaking of
insensitivity, we were thinking of crime.
Like, she's, we're gonna go to Israel.
And then he'd like-
Yeah, he invites Destiny.
Now, here's how you can really tell that this is all staged.
Because who invites their party planner
to your friends group trip?
If you've ever started that before.
Ugh.
She's like, what?
Huh?
Did I hear that right?
Look, I know him.
His friends are dope and I'm a risk taker.
So I'll go.
I'm like, a risk.
You're going to fly a first class to Israel.
In fact, I'm Ryan's a risk time.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then they start doing this again, and y'all.
Like, oh, no, no, no, no, no.
That's the another warrior princess, people. Exactly. And the store owner's like,
the only land bitch. So I don't know if you're describing himself or he was just excited.
So then we go to Tom and MJ and they're on a date. And we just hear Tommy go, have you ever had Korean barbecue before?
And she's like, stop acting like that because he thinks it's hilarious that he's on TV. So I like that he walks into these scenes being like, whoa, here we are in a restaurant.
How crazy Korean barbecue.
Ha, look please stop. And he's like, whoa, look at daddy-ass.
Look at daddy-ass!
She walks in the door.
I'm joy-dance and Korean meat my mouth!
Ha!
And I'm just like, ladies, this is how you keep it fresh.
You just keep dating your husband's, OK?
I was like, just please stop dating in public.
Please. Do it. Congratulations. Keep it fresh at home. Dating your husband's okay. I was like just please stop dating in public. Please
Do it congratulations. Keep it fresh at home. You do not need to be chewing in public either Would please just you know what get a hello fresh box and then just keep it in your apartment
Just stay there
Okay
You know it's like this
He's to this he is to that, you dad's dying, cheers!
What's wrong?
She's like, babe, what's fuck?
You know what? Just fuck it.
Why don't you just go get those ovulation strips?
And let's get pregnant.
Ovulation strips?
Is it this kimchi enough?
I'm sorry, am I blowing it?
I'm not blowing enough new things today.
Am I blowing out everyone's ears?
I'm trying to like not yell into the microphone,
but I feel like with Tommy,
I can't help but do it at full voice.
I apologize if I'm blowing out of your ears.
Yeah, I've actually like lost my Tommy
because I did it too hard
that now I feel like I've made some permanent lung damage.
I'm doing my Dorenda where I just squeam away from the light!
I am screaming away, but I still feel like I'm blowing out everyone's ears.
What's the big deal, I'm just-
It's also my voice is getting more possessed.
We gotta make decisions as a toast, Keg!
Like I gotta quit smoking!
You gotta quit breathing out your mouth!
What, no other guy? Dressing like a fetish blow-up duel? I gotta stop sending! You gotta quit smoking you gotta quit breathing out your mouth
Dressing like a fetish blow up duel. I gotta stop sending dick pics to mr. Met
I should probably stop calling your mom to see word
I'm just like, I just want my parents to really enjoy the kids.
You know, like guys with strokes love kids.
That's what they need kids running around their hospital realm.
I don't think it's possible for Vida to enjoy a child, to really enjoy any other human
being.
I think she only enjoys ping pong balls.
You are disgusting.
You're disgusting little baby. You can do nothing for yourself. This
is why you need to be that fat little idiot. Trying all the time. You think this is good
mother for you? M.A. M.A. is no good mother for you. You think you're going to survive? Sleeping
all day? Sleeping all day baby? You have to drink more than milk baby. You're going to survive sleeping all day? Sleeping all day, baby? You have to drink more than milk, baby.
You're not even holding koozy. Where am I supposed to put my drink when you come over, huh?
On my knee?
You don't even clean for me, baby. You're a show up and you don't even put away dirt
baby.
So Tommy knows that there's probably no natural way that MJ can get pregnant.
I'm just what MJ puts into her body with drugs alcohol.
She's squeezed that baby out just with the spandex she wears.
I don't, I think he has a feeling that a baby would not just date.
So he just goes along with it.
He's like, all right.
All right.
Sounds good to me.
Yeah. You'll be a good man. She's like, alright, alright, sounds good to me. You'll be a good ma. You'll
be a good dad. He's like, alright. Any agree? Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just
gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife.
And I'm Sydney Battle. And we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell.
Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud,
from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions.
What does our obsession with these feud say about us?
We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between
Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her
laminated eyebrows., it snowballed into
a full-blown alleged feud.
But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon.
Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood.
How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully
crafted narrative designed to sell albums?
Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad free on the Amazon
music or wonder ya.
He's a huge, a huge thing of meeting his mouth with this chopstick and then just sits there
chewing with his mouth open and MJ tells us, some Mahayak had babies at my age. So Tommy,
you're going to get those ovulation sticks,
and he's like, this is so fucking romantic!
With meat flying out of his mouth.
These two.
And I'm sure that Korean barbecue spot has since closed.
They're like, uh, we have brought shame to our family.
We're gonna close this restaurant now.
People like Tommy and MJ are the reason it's so uncomfortable for me to eat
Korean barbecue where there's just potato salad always in the middle of the table like when you get there
There's potato salad there. You see it's spittle coming out of people's mouths like that that I worried
So then speaking of spittle we then go over to Gigi's fashion show
Where we had a surprise kink
in the plan, which is that Janice Dickinson is there, and that's how you can really tell
that this designer is Hote Kutura, because Janice Dickinson is modeling for him.
And she's wearing the weird romper type thing that Gigi was supposed to wear, and Janice
is posing with it
admittedly it looked better on jannis than it did on gg but
it still looks like a cheap piece of shit yeah they just told her go start shit in their jannis like how rad just pull him in the air to what gotta be like go put that romper on yeah so you
see jannis in the background throwing a fit and yelling at people because she's on TV,
but they didn't even shooting her. It's like, this is so sad. They didn't even, this whole thing
is just making me sad. You know, Janice thinks this is her big return. She shoved in the background
while Gigi's calling her an old skinky bitch. They didn't even bother to give her a kairon. They
weren't even like, oh, Janice Dickinson, you I think a full like through a commercial break before they even mentioned her name jastic and send
they just were like is that old wench this whole scene was there was sadness everywhere
gg arrives like she still drunk or drugged up from the night before she's got these big
bags just like Mike said you know thank god you're not looking messy anymore, whatever, like Raccoonie.
That's how she shows up.
They're like holding her up.
And the designer's like, do you watch champagne or patron?
And she goes, oh, no, no, no, I'm not drinking.
Is that patron?
She's like, okay, I'll start drinking over.
Yeah.
So sad.
And then she says, I'm trying, you know, I'm so tired, but I'm really trying
to use this moment out or I'm trying, you know, I'm so tired, but I'm really trying to ooo-sut this moment out.
Or get shit faced, you know.
See, this is what I'm telling you, people get positive and they learn to excuse or
behavior with better words.
You just get drunk.
Stop pretending it's meditation.
It's still alcoholism.
Yeah, exactly.
So then, Shervin shows up and then Resa and Adam do and they're all just...
There's like chatting, they're hanging out talking about Israel perhaps and again,
Gigi is still fuming that Janice has... that Janice is stolen her look and she says,
you can find that old ass bitch something else to wear.
I don't know why she was so mad. And by the way, did you notice that Janice made the adjustments that Gigi's mom had suggested?
Did you see that?
No, she did.
Probably though.
So they've got Janice behind her and she's like, well, can you get the designer?
Because she's in my fucking jumper, okay?
And then you see Janice yelling in the background.
Well, where the hell you been doing the last 30 minutes?
I'm gonna wear that outfit tonight.
And then Janice goes into a random part of the room
and has a photographer start taking pictures of her.
Yes, it's so stupid, but still so funny.
So Resa invites Gigi and Shervin to Israel.
And Shervin has reservations because he says, you know, he's doing business
with Arab countries and if you go to Israel, you're not allowed in those countries or something
like that.
And you just like, can we go to a Headee instead of Israel?
Is that a possibility?
I like how Raza brings it up.
He's like, oh my god, Janice Dick to his friends with like a someone who identifies as a clown
That assistant yes, I did
So by the way Israel what's the temperature of the comfort level?
Geez and servants like you know, I have business in these Arab states, you know actually guys
I have business in a Arab states, you know actually because I've business in a lot of these
Arab states
So you know you can't go to certain countries if you go to Israel and if it starts to be making a living and runs us like
What what is he doing? It's like he's doing e-commerce with the Sultan of Brunei
What does he even do? Who does that?
So yeah basically, and Resa, he basically tells us, look, I love the people of Iran. I love
the countryside. I just hate the government. And as somewhere around here, I forget what
they were saying, but ultimately, Resza goes, fuck you wrong. And then
GG and Sherman were like super offended by that. So then it became like a little thing.
You can't talk about it around that way. Yada, yada, yada. So now there's tension amongst
the group. Yes, and I love Servin because Reza's like, come on guys, I feel chewy. And
Servin's like, he's feeling chewy.
That's like, if someone took a picture
next to a roasting lamb with a beer in their hand
and said, I'm a Muslim.
And I was like, hello, that's your whole show.
Yeah.
That's basically this entire show.
Exactly.
Also, I want to point out that Brunei is in Southeast Asia.
So that reference that resume did not sit well with me,
geographically speaking.
Well, that's the best part of this whole show.
No one even knows what's going on where they go.
Yeah.
And it was like that with I ran too.
No one knows what's going on.
They all have these weird ideas about it.
Yeah.
Gigi's like, I don't like Israel because like, they're not cool.
But is this the part where she started, I think she started talking about this later?
There were, there was a few moments where she, she just had some of the things that's
oh my god. Gigi waxing Israel is hilarious. Like, I'm not way to get to that part.
Okay. So then the fashion show actually begins and it's so awful. I mean, first, there's the runway is set against this backdrop that is like this, it's like a video projection
of flames. So it looks even cheesier than it ever could have. It was bad enough that there
was this like mylar out, these mylar outfits that these women had to wear, but then you
had this like these fake flames in the background. It just I know it was so.
It was so easy.
Stop teasing us.
Like that's where we need to be seeing these clothes in flames.
Like stop teasing positivity, buddy.
Yeah.
So she's like, oh my god, models do this in their sleep.
Like you're literally doing this in your sleep.
Yeah.
They covered her eyes in black because her eyes were so dark.
They just gave her like a,
they painted on a burglar mask for her face.
They basically did.
It was such a convoluted look because her hair was all
like teased up in like sort of like a high,
it looked like a horseman, you know, that look where it's all
like, it's like a, it's like a female mohawk thing
where the hair's up and going back.
And then she has this like super smoky band it's mask thing female Mohawk thing where the hair's up and going back and then she has this like
Super smokey bandits mask thing going on with her face. It's sort of like this avant-garde Haud-Cature look
But then what she was wearing was
this one like a silver boxers robe and then under it was like a sports bra and like an underwear
So it just nothing added up. It was this weird hokotura
look with very basic sort of sporty underwear, but then of this weird shiny robe. Yeah, man.
I'm GG. GG weight, like obviously wasted, swirving all over the place and going, this
is the start of a new responsibility for me.
And then trips on the runway.
Just like, oh my God.
And then Janice got one job.
He's like, Hey, me, Tommy.
Like, oh my God, Janice.
She starts like oddly skipping like one of her legs is a peg
leg. I mean, it's just a weird.
The whole thing is weird.
GG trips and gets booze. Yes. And she had said in the thing before, she's like, it's gonna be a
like section in the city where the girl falls and then she gets up on everybody claps and he's like,
if you fucking fall, a fucking kill you. So she doesn't fall but she trips and she goes, you're like,
you know, it's like, I can't explain how you feel. Like you do it and you feel like you're carry Bradshaw and no one can touch
you except really shiny floor tiles which aren't people. Unless you look down and then you
see your face and you're like, are you touching me? Like, oh my god, get off the runway.
I guarantee you we're going to get an angry email from this guy. I just I can just feel it
You'd be like you don't know what you're talking about. I work hard for my fashion. I went to fit in
You know, you know, you know, we're gonna get one of those please
You know, we're gonna be like the cheapest ass material and it's gold rompers like please
You had a shot of sunset. Okay, model your
Who is really really like the the the line between Janice to
consent and Caitlin Jenner has become very blurry.
I actually thought it was Caitlin Jenner when this I wasn't
even not trying to be snarky.
I truly thought it was Caitlin Jenner.
I was like, wow, Caitlin Jenner was Maxine the shoebox lady
just cut out of this.
What about Wendy the Snapple lady?
What about what about Snapple lady? What about that lady? What about the, what about the lady who played Frankie on Sisters?
What about Park overall people?
What about Park overall?
What about one of the double trouble twins?
Maybe both.
Where were they?
Oh my god.
It was Mary Stewart Masterson busy. Although actually I would have really respected twins, maybe both. Where were they? Oh my god.
It was Mary Stewart Masterson busy.
Although actually I would have really respected that,
nevermind, I take it back.
I love Mary Stewart Masterson.
How could I, how could I be so cruel?
So anyway, the next day we're at a pumpkin patch
and GG, GG's there and Assa shows up
and Assa of course is like babe, look at these pumpkins.
It's like, it's like my pregnant belly,
but like out of me. Yeah, I like I've got a little pumpkin inside of me the other day I was
at a peanut farm and I was like oh my god it's like my peanut my little peanut yeah so and
asked us like yeah babe we're gonna get a pumpkin for Thanksgiving just like I don't know is a
Thanksgiving is it Halloween I don't know and even it Thanksgiving? Is it Halloween? I don't know. And even Gigi's like, come on.
You've been in this country for like 15, 20 years.
You know, the difference between Thanksgiving
and the Halloween.
You're American enough to purposely get pregnant
by a Jackson, so you're financially set for life.
You're American enough to know what a fucking
pumpkin patch is for, okay?
Don't you have any, even if you didn't know,
which holiday it was for, don't you have any, even if you didn't know which holiday it was for,
don't you have any awareness of the fact that Thanksgiving is a full month away
and that the pumpkin, don't you understand how pumpkins work?
The pumpkin's not gonna last until Thanksgiving.
Well, I guess it could, but if you carve it, it won't.
Don't you understand these things?
You are not gonna have me believe that anybody on this cast doesn't understand a holiday built around food.
I have actually a theory.
You know, I know you love a conspiracy theory.
Here's my conspiracy theory.
Germain is a Jehovah's Witness.
In fact, I'm not sure are all the Jackson's Jehovah's Witnesses.
I'm not sure if they are, but I think when you're a Jehovah's Witness, you don't celebrate
holidays.
And so maybe this was sort of a like, I don't know holidays. Like it was maybe something for Germain, maybe. Like pandering to the family. I don't celebrate holidays. And so maybe this was sort of a, like, I don't know holidays,
like it was maybe something for Draman, maybe.
Like pandering to the family?
I don't know.
I think that may be a stretch.
Maybe, but she don't need to pander now.
She's got the law on her side.
She's having his kids.
She's now got a common law on her side and a baby.
So she's set.
She's not stupid.
But I like that she's still like,
well, I don't want to get in trouble with Ms. Jackson, you know?
She can be.
I'm sorry, Miss Jackson.
She is for real.
For you.
So I just want to say for the record, we have now had an outcast reference and a Peter in the Wolf reference on the same part overall.
Thank you.
Just batting ourselves in the back.
The only thing we've all three of those concepts together in one recap. Serving arrives at the pumpkin patch and he's like, who is he saying this?
He's like, hey, you want this white one? I know you like a my GG.
I know you like a my. You know, I totally miss that. I totally miss that.
Oh, no, I think Gigi was saying servant you want this little white pumpkin because I know you like a white
He's like I'm an equal opportunity pumpkin car bar
So they're like oh pumpkins say I don't know when Thanksgiving and how was Halloween? I don't know what that is
Hey, you guys want to go to Israel?
Yeah, no these pumpkins remind me of Israel. You want to go?
And servants like, are people going to spit at me? We know we're not welcome there in any.
I was like, do you know what's going to happen when you go to one of the countries you all are from?
They will spit at you as well. Like, let me tell you something.
If Shervin goes to Israel, he will be pounced upon by the Israeli guys because he will,
Shervin's hot, first of all, Shervin's hot,
and those Israeli guys are going to eat him up.
So he will be reversed sped on.
Or if he's sped on, it's like going to be a sexy way.
Yeah, they might spit on your dick.
Yeah, don't you worry Shervin,
they'll treat you right.
They'll treat you right.
And then Gigi's like, well, I'm American mostly,
but I'm Iranian.
And my mom made sure that I go to Iran
every year of my life, and it's different
because Israel's so negative about me and my culture.
But in Iran, I don't have to wear,
like, wait, what is she saying?
She's like, people think, people think
like you have to wear this workout.
No, it's not like that. I just have to make sure that my head
is covered, my neck is covered, my hands are covered, my wrists, my knees, my ankles,
uh, my feet, uh, she looks like 20 things. She's like, you see? Well, she says, well, I,
I like, you know, this show is, this show is also hilarious and just have, again, how down
market it is because she's like, listen, I'm, you know, I'm is, this show is also hilarious and just how, again, how downmarket it is because she's like,
listen, I'm, you know, I'm opening up to Jewish culture.
I mean, I've opened this to Jewish culture and then the camera just zooms in on her vagina.
I was like, so classy at all point.
Even at a pumpkin patch, they find a way.
But it's kind of funny with Gigi.
I understand why she would, she would feel scared because I know like as a Jewish person,
I would feel a little scared going
to probably a predominantly Muslim country as well.
But since she, as someone who is talking about
how beautiful Iran is and people get the wrong idea of it,
she should know, like, she should understand,
how do I say this?
Here she is afraid to go to Israel because she she thinks she'll be unwelcome there and yet at the same time she talks about how this country's beautiful and people get the wrong impression of it
it's like you are you are you are doing what you you think people are sort of doing to you about a rant if that makes sense like yes and a stupid these people are that is you know that is I think the point of it. It's like we all excuse our own cultures, even when they're wrong, you know. I mean, in American
culture, if you argue with anybody and say, well, we're bombing, you know, a zillion countries
right now, and look how many, in a sense, we've killed in the name of whatever. Most of us
don't even know where it war. People in our country are like, huh? Like, they don't even,
they aren't aware of it, or we've learned to be okay with it or excuse it because it's us or like, yeah, if you go through the histories of all of our
religions and well, frankly, just our people like our country's history is not, you know, we've got
a lot of embarrassed, a lot of things to be ashamed of. But we're just like, well, you know, it's
over now and that's history. But when it's you, you've learned to accept it in your culture, it's
just when it's actually got to be. Well, that's just the way, you know, it's over now and that's history. But when it's you, you've learned to accept it in your culture. It's just when it's actually...
Well, that's just the way, you know, but that's even larger.
That's just the way life is where if you understand the context of something, if you, you know,
if you only know something from a distance, from a distance, but if you don't really,
if you never really had exposure to something, if you've never been around something, if it's just sort of almost an abstract concept to you, you will have
strange notions about it, you'll be scared of it, and chances are you will make terrible
decisions about that thing.
So whether it's Israel or Iran or gay people or black people, if you haven't been around
like something outside of your box, you're gonna
think of the worst things, you know.
It's like me with UFC.
Yeah, what you're born into is normal to you.
You know, a lot of gays are like, you were raised a born again.
Christian, that's insane.
What happened to you?
Did they tie you up?
Did they?
Yeah.
But you're just, what seems crazy to other people is, you know,
all people can be all people. We all put and this is why it's important to watch
Sean's a sunset because we all have to understand what the other people are like, you know,
well, that's frustrating about this show because here we are having, you know, an actual
conversation about it, which I don't even know that this warrants it to show. It just seems wrong to even have even a
broken clock is right twice today. But what about an entire
room of broken blocks? Well, it told me right at some point,
just never at the right time, all together at the same time,
I mean. So Gigi's like, well, I, you know, my problem and I don't even
mean to start anything, but it's with Resa because I don't like
when he says, fuck, I ran, you know, and so let's confront it,
but like in a really nice way. And then us is like, Shalom,
Shalom.
It's like, Shalom, Shalom. Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm actually glad that the producers did not let this become a multi-episode feud that
started with Resa saying fuck around because I feel like I actually do think that I understand
and I don't take it away from GG and Shervin to be like, what the fuck,
that's not cool.
But I would have felt like it would have been very forced if it became a big feud.
I'm glad it was like a little blip for one episode that wasn't even that big of a thing
and then they squashed it.
Otherwise, I would have been like, no, this cannot be, please don't make this an arc.
I need my arc to be much more petty.
Well, they seem to be trying that a lot in this.
Like, it's an important conversation
it needs to be had.
If we all feel different things,
and we feel different things,
but it's an important conversation.
Like, for example,
also having a baby with a black man,
which Persians hate.
They're trying to do that a lot.
And it's like, I guess,
I don't know that I appreciate it,
but I'm not offended by it,
but it's like, you're the Shows of Sunset.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
So if there was any fleeting sense of depth and intrigue
and intellectualism, it was literally flushed down
the toilet by the next scene,
which was Tommy and MJ sticking an opulation stick
under her urine stream.
Yes, oh my God. Yeah.
This is the MJ condo shot.
Just going to MJ's house.
They're like close up on a crumpled empty cigarette pack.
And then no perturbed.
You know, talk about a no fly.
So yeah.
Hey, and then she's feeding Tommy on a TV tray while he's watching football or whatever.
And he's like, God, what's up with this yoga crap and this?
I hate that crap.
And she's like, um, it's sauce and he's like, all right, all right.
That's pretty good.
So she's like, all right, well, I'm going to test if I'm ovulating and you know if I'm ovulating, you know you can't jerk off.
But he relaxes me
Yeah, okay. I don't even know why you need to jerk off and you've got this
Yeah, so like look, I don't want to be the end of the hobby generation
Or the javid that generation. I'm like, please be you know what everybody and I say this to all the guys who are my age and my friends who are having babies and stuff. Who needs it?
Just to talk to baby. Like, do you really need your short little Italian Harry-ass replicated?
Why? Why do we need, why do we need a Tommy and MJ hybrid? Why? Yeah, yeah, but I don't
think we need that. So, yeah, so now they go, she goes in the bathroom with her little ovulation stick and she's just on the toilet and we just hear her peeing
Well, well actually before she even pees he's your Tommy Barking like P
Oh
This please stop barking at her to pee she's like if it's positive we're gonna make invitation lists for the wedding
She's like if it's positive we're gonna make invitation lists for the wedding
Because my babies aren't gonna be bastards. Look at hot MJ It's like even getting one in on the ossa in your fake pee on a stick scene such an asshole
Exactly and then we'd listen to the trickle of her pee in the toilet also. She's eating like a fucking chicken like while she's peeing
She's filming
My yogurt sauce and you huh? He's like if it's positive you're getting pounded right here on the count. I'm gonna pound young a pound of finance
MET at smuts smuts mj
Nets, MET, Smots, Smots, Mets, MJ!
Jesus. So thankfully, I put, this scene is kind of fake,
but the terrible people that you don't want to sit next
to on a plane are real.
Yeah, yes, exactly.
So we then go over to Gigi's condo
because she's moving now.
It's like every season, it's like a round rob
and of these people moving around. So- And I like that they pretend that ito because she's moving now. It's like every season. It's like a round robin of these people moving around
So and I like that they pretend that it's because they like moving and not because they're getting kicked out for non-payment or
You know noise ordinances exactly so
Shurven and Annelise show up and Annelise is like yeah, it seems it my airplane the engines fell off instead of the wings
So I have to stay here another day. It's like, okay, well, welcome.
And basically Mike shows up looking horrific.
And we learn now that he has moved on
from the sneaker business to, he basically
bought a moving company because he found one for sale
and he's like, it's not a sexy job,
but you know what, it's gonna pay the bills.
And he immediately trips, he hits himself or whatever,
on the moving on the truck.
And he's like, ah, fuck, I ruined my Adidas.
Like, why are you wearing bright white Adidas
to move someone?
And a full face of makeup.
And a full face of makeup.
And he doesn't even know how to move the furniture.
Like all the guys get it all wrapped up.
And he's like, how do we lift this?
Like, what?
It's like I'm willing
to learn, okay? So they go into Gigi's hoarding room, which is basically, she's just got
an extra room, she throws all the shit she buys in it. Looks like a garage. It's disgusting
and dirty. They're shit everywhere. And she goes, look, you guys, when I got my ass
done, these were the blow up donuts I had to set on. Everyone likes vintage. It's wrong with you people. Yeah. So then, so then, yeah, it's more stuff about Gigi and
Shrugger. There's one point I have to point out when she goes, I didn't, I didn't touch
a thing. Oh, Mike's like, yeah, Gigi didn't even have to touch a thing. And she goes, yeah,
I did. I touched the mover of the moving company
And then she hugs him and then servants like, hey, you got in trouble for touching the move that moving man before, huh?
And then they flash back to where she's like, you tried to read me in that hotel room
Yes, I'm in the like they cut back to them being like, oh
Okay, now let's talk about Israel. I don't think it's cool I'm like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh? So now it's like, okay, everyone's getting ready for the party and basically we show up
at this party.
It's at some random Victorian house.
It looked like it was maybe the universal back lot or something.
I couldn't tell.
But Resa and Adam show up dressed like Rabbis, like acidic Rabbis.
You know, they got the beers, they got the little the curlies after they go with those
are called.
And I'm just thinking myself
This is not good now. I get that Reza's half Jewish, but um
I don't here's it's it just I couldn't even totally pinpoint what was totally wrong about this
It just felt not right
It's because it was totally stereotypical everything was wrong and I it's kind of oh, I kind of felt like oh
You know, I didn't get offended.
Like you're not allowed, because it's Shah's
and they're doing it on purpose.
So even going down that road is like,
oh, they tricked me.
But also I'm like, oh, I'm concerned
for all the misguided fraternity parties
that are gonna be born out of this.
Like, yeah.
You know, like when I went to college in 1990,
back in 98 at Dartmouth, one of the, there was
a fraternity and a sorority that held a Pimpson hose party and they sent out an invite me
like dress like your favorite Pimpson.
I've come dressed like a crack or and you can put like a pillow into make yourself like
pregnant.
It was really bad.
It was called the ghetto party.
I'm sorry, it was called the ghetto party, which is even worse than Pimps and others. Oh my God. It made
national news. It was debated on politically incorrect when that was on the air. And
since then, it's just like, oh, you know what? Don't dress up as other culture. Bill
Marley was probably like, who wants a Pimp at the party? I don't want to do business at
the party. Just on the hose. Just just stay away from just stay away from these things
people stay away. Well, they don't. And they walk up to this house
and there's the skinned lamb props that are hanging from the
door. And Adam's like, Oh my God, that's not real, are they?
And he goes, if you were Jewish, they would be like, Oh my
God. I know.
I was, I also like that Adam was like very concerned at that moment.
Yeah, Adam had to tell everyone I was mauled by a dying lamb.
Like that way, mom, I'm mortified.
And then Resa already, again, Resa's already...
Yeah, I was just gonna say that Resa's already pre-building in his excuses.
He's like, yeah, we have those lambs hanging because that's just what you would see in the Middle East.
If you go to the Middle East, any marketplace, you'll see hanging lambs.
I'm like, you are not hanging those to create an authentic Middle Eastern marketplace vibe.
This is not a bizarre.
This is you being like, oh, that was a cool lamb.
It'll be like Passover
Resicas do I look rabbi or amish
Amish I'm Amish way girl. I'm like Adam. How does he look?
Amish at all
Amish are like the widest people in the world
Like amish
Bitch do I look like I drowned someone in a silo? From spring a bitch.
So I'm an Amaz white girl girl.
And then Resa on top of everything else, he says.
The real reason why I'm having this totally offensive
stereotypical party is to get people to come on board to go to Israel.
So if I can show them what my intentions are for this trip,
it's all about peace, it's about acceptance, it's about respect.
I'm like, how is this about respect?
You have like you have like a like a manoras and a giant pile of coins.
The editor is he says, I hope I'm not disrespectful.
And then they cut to him putting a burka on a waiter.
He's like, that's my burka bitch.
I'm like, where are your piles of bagels?
You know, can I get some red label up in this bitch,
burka bitch?
And so then Assa shows up and she's like,
hey babe, I dress his world piece
because basically I've got like a globe inside me.
I got the whole world in my belly.
Answer baby, babe, I'm pregnant.
And she's wearing a plastic map strapped over her belly.
You know, for someone who believes in fung shway, you're like suffocating your baby.
Yeah.
Why would you do that?
It's not healthy.
It's not good.
Not cute.
I didn't like it.
I did actually, it was the most defensive part.
I did actually think that Reserv was funny
when he was like, every day she's like the embodiment
of all Muslim and Iranian things.
And today she shows up in like a sports bra
like what's going on?
Bitch be like dressing regular.
Yeah, she's like the most lamias person I know.
Yeah, like what the hell?
So Mike comes in dressed as Moses.
Which was, which was actually one of the least offensive costumes.
I was like, that was fine.
I was, I was like, okay, finally, someone, something that's not going to make me roll my
eyes in a full half circle.
Yeah, with this Moses midspin on my life, girl.
And then OGG also shows up in like a Berkha with a Jewish star
and sunglasses.
Also, maybe not the best.
And then I like, I actually like Shervin,
Shervin's costume was good.
He shows up, he was like, yeah,
I'm like a Middle East dynamic grin from the 70s
and you had like a really,
he had like a leisure suit on with a wide collar and everything.
And Resa was like, bless Shervin's heart,
but bitch gotta be better. I'm like, what
do you say? His costume is the best one there.
No, they made a resa sound in the interview section. They made
him sound kind of nice. Like, bless his heart. But when he saw
Sherv, he did that angry slurping thing on his tiny straw. And
I was like, Oh, Sherv. Yeah. Because that's me. You don't get it.
I thought that Shervin was, was, sure. Yeah. Because that's me. You don't get it.
I thought that Sherman was,
his was more like a parody of like his culture.
You know, his culture, the other ones just felt,
just did not feel right.
And he was also kind of being funny in the face
of an offensive party.
Exactly.
And he was like, I'll dress up that I will not be here
in affecting acidic costume or a burger, okay?
Exactly.
He's like, I'm gonna take, well, you know what it was
because he took more of a cultural thing.
It was not, when I say cultural meaning like,
this is making fun of how our people
dress a certain point in time.
Not like, look at this crazy rabbi,
look at this crazy burka.
Well, if anybody is really offended,
don't worry, M.J. will come and one up everybody.
She shows up in a giant host skeleton costume.
And she's like, well, you know, it's about the Middle East and what better represents
than than a bunch of dead people.
That's like, oh, that was actually my favorite.
I take it back.
I actually left out loud, which he said, since when does a skeleton not represent the
lives lost for real peace?
Oh my God. That was great
I well, you know she was bullshitting, you know, yes
Yes, but it's just like only she could wind up everybody at the Middle East party
It was great and then my goes well
She has he goes baby supposed to be Middle Eastern. Mike says she has side poop though. Okay, that's Middle Eastern
And then Gigi was trying to drink a beer through her burger.
And she couldn't do it.
She actually said, this is like a costume.
I can't breathe.
Yes, it's literally a costume.
Stupid.
So we and Servin says, I thought you were going to say you're going to make
a tiny hole for a straw and she goes or a little cock and they both at the same time go Mike
Anyway, let's talk about Israel
Yeah, pretty much you're like, haha, let's make fun of Mike for having a tiny penis. What do you think of these for you?
Yeah, and then GG
Yeah, well they're once again doing this whole,
she's once again complaining,
well the best part about all this is that GG is again,
saying like, you know, we're not welcome there.
They said that they want a new caran
and I don't like that,
Raza said fuck her in,
and this entire time that she's having this very serious monologue
about her feelings and her,
like why she does not feel welcomed in Israel.
She's in her freaking burka with sunglasses on.
It was so surreal that she was having a serious moment and her face is fully covered.
It wasn't a real burka, so it really looked like she was just like in a weird black ghost
costume with sunglasses on in her Jewish star.
And she's going on like there's only like these white Jewish people.
I think she thinks of Israel's like these white American Jews in their own city.
That's not what Israel is.
There's all different religions and cultures in Israel.
It's not just Jewish people.
There are mosques in Israel.
Yeah.
GG.
GG.
So, yeah.
So basically, and I should mention that, you know, so now,
well, Reza comes over and he clarifies, he does this thing and he's like,
let me just clarify that I love the people and I love the land,
but I hate the government and that's what I said.
So if I offended you, I'm sorry.
And then she's like, I'm going to Israel.
Yeah, she's like, maybe that's what I've been doing
with Israel, like ding, ding, ding.
And she's like, I'm gonna go so I could get wasted
in private so you guys don't turn on me again.
And they're like, okay, bye.
What are you coming?
And she's like, fuck yeah, let's get naked,
wasted in Israel.
I was like, oh my God.
Yeah, and then she just sort of makes one last joke
to Mike about, hey, remember that time
and I accused you of ripping me?
Ha ha ha ha ha, dancing.
It happened twice in the episode that they did that.
Ugh.
I'm going to Israel.
Oh, good, this show.
Yeah, that was pretty fun.
Oh, wrap her up, being.
Well, you guys, we made it to the end of Monday.
Um, thanks a whole bunch for listening.
You know what, the whole social media spiel.
Go do it.
Our tickets for our live show.
Go do it.
And if you've done it, just go do it.
Tell your friends, post it on Facebook, share it everywhere.
Okay.
Go do it because it'll be so fun.
It'll be like partying in Israel.
Um, boo boo boo.
Guys, we're gonna talk to you tomorrow and tomorrow we're gonna do some real house
as a bar on county.
Oh, oh, how do we not mention this?
Guess what?
On Wednesday, in addition to our normal below deck recap, we have a full on interview with
Hannah, the first two.
So tune in for that on Wednesday, it'll be super fun.
Do it everybody.
Yeah, we love you and we'll talk to you guys. Love you guys.
Bye.
Koi!
before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at
onedry.com slash survey.