Watch What Crappens - Southern Charm: Hilton Headlock

Episode Date: May 25, 2018

The Southern Charm gang heads to the Head, and Ashley almost loses hers when she goes up against Kathryn. This week's bonus is a chill stroll through the mall with Ben and Ronnie. To hear it, become a Patreon member at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. ***Limited Edition Give Them BenRon tees at crappensmerch.com avail through May! **Crappens Live is coming to San Francisco, Phoenix, Irvine, DC, and has added second shows in Atlanta and Philadelphia! Find ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. For all of our bonus episodes and premium content, become a member over at patreon.com slash watch what crap ends

That's patreon.com slash watch what crap ends You can also find us on social media on Twitter. We're at what crap ends on Instagram and Facebook at watch what crap ends We'll see you there I have cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cram, cr Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors. Christy Wowardy-Dowardy! Kelly Barlow, and she goes Barlow, we go high-low. Megan Berg, he can't have a burger without the Berg. Jess Sayon, okay. Shannon out of a cannon Anthony! Suzy, going to the Tobin.

Megan, never a failure Taylor and our super premium Patreon subscribers Kelly Grant the Grant master give them home miss Noel Gena Murphy the Muffinator and Lizzie Drucker a fun motherfucker. We love you guys Hello and welcome to the watchwell Crappin's podcast! The podcast about all that crap we just left to talk about in Hilton Hit. I'm Molly Karen from the Rose Pricks Bachelor Rost, which is back. And here I am with the gorgeous, talented, newly haircutded, Ben Mandelker of the Beside blog and the Banta Blender. Hello, Ben.

How are you? Babe, I love introducing you a terrible grammar. That's okay. I didn't even notice. Cut it, dude. Cut it, what I should've did today. What I should've cut it, dude. So everybody, welcome to what's with crappin' Southern Chalme day.

Quick, chill, big chill. We're doing our live shows. We're doing them the rest of the year. So we're gonna make these really quick at the top of the show Did not make you crazy our next ones are in Phoenix Which is gonna be really fun because it's real housewives of New York Which has been a ma's and then we're going to do San Francisco and we're gonna do this show southern charm on gay pride in San Francisco

So Lord knows what they're gonna be doing to that poor innocent little Ashley girl by then But we're gonna have fun talking about it So Lord knows what they're going to be doing to that poor innocent little Ashley girl by then. But we're going to have fun talking about it. So get your tickets at watchwetcrapants.com. And you can also find links to get the final week of Give Them Ben Ron shirts. We come out with a new limited shirt next week after the Holy Days. So and also happy holidays everybody. Thank you, everyone. Haps halls. And just to add one more thing onto the thing,

is we are doing just for laughs in Montreal. So if you want to come to see just for less comedy festival, it's a huge, huge, huge deal. And I actually went on to Google today. It's like, I've been saying people, it's like a huge festival. It's number one. It's the number one comedy festival, according to like the Guardian or something.

So guys, now you, now come. Yeah, now us, we've decided. It's rumors fact. According to watch at Krapins and the Guardian. Yeah, I have some concerns, which I think are valid, to quote the lady from below deck. And my concern is that you're not treating it with enough prestige.

But anyway, that was it. I just want to make sure people know about that. And are able to come. a lot of our Canadian friends come see us. Yeah, come on canoks. Good. Yeah, say Traybian. Celine Dion is going to be there too at our show. We should say. We're gonna our whole shows gonna be crying over Renee. Oh, we're gonna Renee will have Poutine for everyone Please give give me some writing boots. I've never been writing in my life. Renee Why don't you not invite me to the St. Party, Renee?

The Renee, I mean, let's be honest. Ashley is sort of like the Poutine of women, right? sort of A sloppy mess that goes on the French fries known as Thomas Rapinnell. Yes, pretty much. They're basically, yeah, diarrhea fries. Those like chili cheese fries. But also, it's funny that Selene came up because it's a very Titanic kind of episode. Yeah, it's very, very Titanic and that there was like huge amounts of tragedy and something was thrown into the deep and it will never be reclaimed.

And if a rich people want to vote, you wish to die, but it's probably the poor people who're going to die in the end. It's like Craig is the only one who's going to die on that vote. This was Ashley's coming out party on Southern Charm. She's a problem and we know that she's been a problem and she's going to be a problem. We've sensitive under the surface and she's been a problem and she's going to be a problem. We've sense it under the surface and it's been bubbling there

and she's been trying to play nice. She has been trying and she can only do so much. Yeah, she can't handle the Southern way. She's tried, she's tried doing the, Hi, how are you? Come in. And like, do the dishes under her sweet, her sweet sound, but it just didn't work and the Southern California girl came out Ashley today and let's be honest

They don't know how to dress and something they don't those crazy liberals on the West Coast I often say that I am the Jimmy Gertz in a movie, you know like that the city girl who comes in that like is in a movie, you know, like the city girl who comes in that like is like not, like can't hang in Twister, you know, and she's like, you need to be with your people chasing Twisters. I'm going back to the city. That's me. And unfortunately, seeing the way Ashley, the way she behaved, I was like, oh no, is this what I am? Because she's the Jamie Guirth too now. Well, don't feel bad. I'm the flying cow in Twister. Just fly along and knock people down. No, you're like, how did that cow do that?

We are the gentle Pepsi cans that help save the world by improving Twister research. I know. Well, we're keeping Twister alive. So I think we've done something for Jamie Gerrtson, Helen Hunt. So you're welcome, ladies. We'll see you in Canada.

No, but I truly owe it. I forget why I say it. It comes up every now and then where I just always feel like I'm that like awkward step mom who is like the new girlfriend who's sort of awkward with the kids and putting out a brave face because she loves the man, but she doesn't really like this lifestyle. I always like that to me, but then seeing Ashian this episode, I'm like, I've got to do better because I cannot be Ashley. I will be Jamie Gritz, but I will not be Ashley.

I can guarantee you you are no Ashley, sir. We would not be here if you were in Ashley, okay? We would have killed each other a long time ago because I'm a Rhonda And I'm saying Rhonda and playing in the same playground. I'll tell you know That's that's actually very true. That's very true. Okay, let me know about there's weaves This episode was amazing this episode was really really amazing You know, I've been an iron making gifts on the same night for the same show and racing to get them on Instagram that it's a good show Yeah, and it's happened two nights in a row

So you know up Bravo for as much shit we get as we give you. Thank you so much for what you do for us We always say thank you this entire podcast is a love letter to Bravo. Okay. Don't ever get a twisted Twister, twister person, twister. Oh my god. Look how that just came back or Twister person. Twister. Oh my God. Look how that just came back. Okay. But bitter. So tricks. Trixie still has not been given more budget ever since she spent it on that banjo guy back in that Chelsea father father daughter scene. So Trixie's tricks. He's still in a closet somewhere banging and trying to get out. Yeah. Now she's relegated to one simple ring line of something. I didn't even write it down this week, but it's usually like, it's a little pepper shaker. Do do do. Like what?

I think this weekend it was like, yeah, it was like, Tabasco sauce and a sausage sauce. Yes, the pregnant. So we open with Cameron, who is still pregnant. And Cameron's one of those girls, I feel like she's a Bethany only in this way because Cameron is no Bethany and vice versa and that's a compliment to you both. But I feel like she's a Bethany in the way when she's pregnant. Pilates baby. She will have a Pilates baby. When you stay healthy and you work out every day, your baby comes out like lifting weights. Yeah, it's like on one of those like torture machines. It's just the machine she's giving birth to a baby end of machine.

That's why there's an issue with the cervix. It's like, I'm sorry, ma'am, we cannot, we cannot have both these things coming through right now. Yeah, it's like me, my mom drank a bottle of wine the day and drank smoked to pack a cigarette, and that's how I came out, you know, this is like, it starts in your little sperm dome and a little egg way down there. So work out, just kidding, smoke. So anyway, she's always pretending she's eating, and today she's got a Costco-sized thing of cheese puffs and pickles, and guess what?

I'm not buying it, pregnant woman. I buy it. She has been very consistent about eating junk food for years and years and I actually believe it now. I will not believe it. And you know what, it was proof because at the end of the scene she feels the kick and she looks over to the camera and she's like, this maybe needs some real food. Oh, you know what, you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to

get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to get you to into the middle of the episode. I'm furious. Yes, it cameras the Costco size of cheese puffs. That's it. That's what I walked away with from this episode. I'm mad.

Can I tell you something? First of all, I was jealous of the puffs, but yesterday I was walking through Ralph's, which is our local supermarket here. And I had this weird moment, this like aha moment, where I was like, there's so much food. I started talking like Chelsea in my brain. I was like, there's so much food. I started talking like Chelsea in my brain. I was like, there's so much and I want to sort of eat all of it. I was like looking at soup cans that were like spaghetti-as. And then it was like the Ralph version,

which was like spaghetti rings. And then there was this frozen thing and that frozen thing. And it's like, obviously, like every time I walk through the supermarket, it's always there. It's not like I don't see it. But for some reason this time, I was like, I've seen you junk food, but tonight, I see you. Like all those weird, there's like a whole world of strange frozen desserts and strange frozen this and strange frozen that like, and it's not like I'm just going to Whole Foods because I rarely

go to Whole Foods. But for some reason, everything was jumping out of me. Like all these bizarre creations that are in the supermarket all times. Like who buys it? And then I was like, I'm not saying with this knobbery, I'm like, I can't believe that there are all these different types of crazy things and that there's like people to support it, you know, in the sense that like there's a market for it. Because I was and but then I got it. Have you seen America? Well, I, have you seen Americans? I, I forget there was something that I saw that looked, I was like, I know there's probably taste terrible,

but I, I wanted it. It was like some, like it was like a cauliflower of lasagna frozen with like a beef steak on it. I was like, I don't know, I'm making that up. Oh, I have to tell you. Of course you turn it healthy even in your dreams. You're like, it was cauliflower lasagna. What?

Well, no, because that's what they say. And it's not, but I don't know what it was. So seeing those cheese poofs, it took me back to last night when like every snack food and every cookie and every frozen concoction was just like jumping out at me saying like, Bami, Bami. So basically those groceries, you were like Andrew McCarthy walking into the store

and those groceries were Molly Ringwald when she finally sewed her dress together for the prom at the end of Pretty and Pink. And he's like, oh my God, I see you. You're finally Molly Ringwald. Yeah, you have finally ascended to my level and I can approve you for this dance and say goodbye to that other guy.

Congratulations. Yeah. It's a Zuckie. Congratulations, Molly Ringwald. You are now Rhoteli Pasta and Colin Flawar at lasagna with beef steak on top. You're welcome. I don't know why actress of the country had great service today. I don't know why I've had a health and need to share that story. If anything, it's just makes me sound like sheltered and ridiculous. But I'm trying to say that it wasn't coming from a place of sheltered. It was like just a moment of like, I walk by these products every day.

But today I see them. I see them Austin. Well, congratulations. Welcome to America. We'll get diabetes together, girl. Thank you. I'm probably running off on you. Okay.

So the up. So we see Austin putting on contacts, which I don't know why we need to see that, but then contacts come up later. And I'm like, you know, these editors are really working hard. Well, contacts is everything. Get it. Um, chef calls his mom. He's like, gosh, I post on my knee surgery. Cause now I've got to get no surgery pretty much as what he said. Um, and we see, we basically land on Naomi talking to her bestie Wilson in their house. And she's like, I wish you're going to what to hold in head with us.

I would hate that you have a job. We have to make fun of Craig all by myself now. Wilson I think is the first person I've seen on reality TV who does not even want to be there. He's just doing it as a favor to Naomi. And you can tell because he's like, why, why do I have to talk to you? I have to go to work. And she's like, but I wish you were coming. And he's like, well, I have to wash all of the towels that you ironed with your hair. Your hair iron. So you

go have fun while I, you know, clean up your mess, French person. You're gonna take a shower today. I just wrote down he's basically, it's basically like talking to a gay wall. It was very refreshing to see on these shows and someone's not thirsty. Yeah, he's like, if you complain again, I'm gonna step on your other foot, okay. He's also the only man I think on the show that has a job, so thank you Wilson.

Thank you for keeping it alive and thank you for scoring one for the gays. Thank you. So Naomi, her whole thing is that she just wishes that she were reacting better to the whole Craig break up and that she's she can't help but be a raging bitch when she's around him and she doesn't want to be but she's she doesn't want it to be that way and she wants to fix it so she's gonna try to like reach out and maybe try to steer like the self correct a little bit.

I like when she says, I'm only human. I'm mean. Which, you know, I've said it. I feel you girl. So next up is Catherine on her janky ass phone. Still hasn't gotten a fix. Well, come on, Catherine. Kids come first.

But how do you have five do even on suitcases and a janky phone. Also, I blame Catherine. I blame Thomas, but more than more than anything, I blame the iPhone 6 because that fucker broke like crazy. I broke I had to replace my screen three times. Listen, I blame gravity. You know, well, I don't blame wicked because they got it right to find gravity. Well nothing turned out great for her spoiler alert. Yeah well that was a spoiler. Daniel Fitt! She was a good witch deep down inside as we learned from the blowdack lady but we'll talk about that next time. You want me to put you in your place place gravity I will put you in your fucking place. Yeah, fuck you Newton. So, um, uh, yeah, you're fixing love your fig cookies. Oh, I know. You know, like, another product, you know, I love, you know what I love doing. It's classic from childhood. You get a fig Newton, you break it in a

half and then you put it back together. Yeah, and it's like, look, it's like an original cookie all by itself. I guess all my snack commentaries and so the next one today. You're going, you're going crazy today with your, I'm kind of worried about you now with your food. I'm starving, Ronnie. I am so hungry right now. Okay, so why? Okay, then let's get back to the busted phone. So Chelsea calls and she's like, hello, this is Chelsea. I love Halo top by a screen. I don't think they have that in Charleston. It's actually disgusting. That's very liberal. Halo top.

It is. It's a sign of the gay agenda Halo top. It's how it's how it's how we gaze call each other. Halo top. Hi, low bottom. Hi, bow. Hi, bow.

Hi, a lot of top. Okay. I'm sorry. You were actually trying to be productive and move the spot guests along. So Catherine's been, um, halo topping, fig neat and cheese puffs along for a while just getting bit.

Okay. So Catherine's been, Catherine's been sad. Okay. Now we're laughing. Hold on. I just want you to know. Okay, now we're laughing. Hold on. I just want you to know, I fully wrote down a comment for later on in the episode that Cameron had EL fudge cookies in her house.

Okay, this is real. You sicko. Okay, so I'm gonna stop laughing because it's serious. So Catherine's mother, grandmother passed away and tells us like, make me laugh as you set up like with a grandma Passable congrats you're the nice one. You see this is what food addiction does to people Ben enjoy the spiral I was laughing at you and not her not her grandma. I know so Chelsea is the last person you want to call when anybody dies Because she's so positive and nobody really wants that you know, she she's like, well, is it a good long life?

Who cares? That's not the point. The point that she's dead. Bring me some food. I like Chelsea's response. It was so warm. She was like, oh, I'm so sorry about that. It was a nice warm life.

Was she raised on a golf course and or in a question center? Good. Now a plantation. I was like, oh, Crim center. Good. Now a plantation. I was like, Oh, cramps. Well, that's awkward. Uh, have you gotten your iPhone fixed yet? You still getting those finger goods.

So we asked, uh, see, we see a clip of her talking to her grandma back when it seems like she was 10 years old. I know. Jesus Christ. This shows only five years old. How have I become a grandfather? I know it's crazy. Well a lot of things have given birth so Thomas and Asher now driving around and they're talking about dresses

Because I she's like I guess I'm talking about dresses for the trip or something like that She's really bad and I'm so sorry because this is a really good scene But I cannot leave the last scene yet because I have to say one thing. We've been Catherine from Remembering Your Grandma She Goes. We have such good memories from growing up. The library, church aerobics, board games, church aerobics. Okay. Okay.

Okay. We can move on. Is that, I mean, I'm from the south. I don't remember church. I remember regular aerobics. I think there was a comma in there. Oh Church comma aerobics. Yeah, probably I'm gonna assume I don't think because I said out loud This isn't just a bad note. This is me screaming at the TV church aerobics. It's a church hard enough

I'm gonna look up. Do people have church aerobics. Why can I out a row bix? Of course they do my sister knows a couple in Texas. It wants to open a Christian bar. What does that mean? I just like the idea of Catherine doing jazz or size in like the church. Yeah, to like I I can't, I can't. I assume all jazz or size is, is just, is set to glory. If I just assume every, every jazz or size class is nothing but glory. Gloria, Gloria, now they got your number. Jesus, now they got your L.A. So, Gloria, Ben. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, uh... in human form so uh... she's okay i really am fucked up i called a routine already now she's a you know i'm a community for

uh... you just turning her into any kind of carburet can think of any carpool to paraphrase joseph uh... also so biblical it all comes full circle uh... yes so so time smash drive around talking about dresses yeah she bought three with ten thousand dollars and she's like but I need one to get altered. If you give me a credit card, I'm sure there's other pants we can buy. Ha ha ha, that's a credit card, credit card, I want a credit card. You are so transparent, you're not even trying

to hide it. You're not even gold digging. You're just like sitting there waiting for someone else to dig the gold and bring it to you. You're gold sitting. You're literally just like watching someone in the water with the pan just waiting for them to find in be like, oh, can I have one also? Thanks. Yeah, I'll bang. I hate when you have boys night. I like it when you're home with me because then we are closer to getting married. She's so gross. Not gonna happen, lady. So he's like she's controlling with my time. She doesn't want me to go out without her, but she did move here for me. So she's a mayor hands mayor hands A dependent mayor hands on me for moral support and mayor hands otherwise

What does that mean and what do you keep making there's mayor hands? Okay, stop talking about politics. You lost making those mayor hands. Okay, stop talking about politics. You lost family. Uh, well, if he's going to get back in politics, he's doing the right thing. He's going to the people and he's going to the people, but going to go in because guess what? That's where they are. A Gwins, the new star of Southern charm. They are. Gwins even has its own sax music. It's like me it's like it's like smooth jazz smooth jazz for smooth sharpest only at wins. Madison is like hi still me. Look we got to have drinks with you guys yet or I'm still going to

be in wins okay got it. Just to wear your Chanel. Yeah love it. It goes with everything except horse ride in. But luckily, you don't have to do that, do you sweetheart? Well, I want my lady to be very presentable at cocktail parties and Charleston. Well, she's from, they don't know how to dress. Southern California, it's a mess.

In Southern California, they like to wear white pants that are fitted instead of too tight to show off your little manholes down there. But in Charleston, you show off all the bits and pieces. How's the person suppose, how's the woman supposed to know the hunt if she can't find a man's moose knuckle? So she's on glasses and she's like, I feel like I'm in it start. And he's like Melania Trump. She goes, my hero. That's fitting. Yeah, that's actually fitting.

What is Melania's new charity called? It's called like, it's a rip off of Bethany's. It's called like, B-Bull. It's called like, B-Better, I think. B-Better. B-Butter. Gotta take your own advice. Yeah.

So Ash is there talking about the outfit. And she's like, the only accessory that I need right now is a ring. Thomas, would you take me ring shopping? Thomas, Thomas, ring shopping? Ring, don't you want to put a ring on it? If you like to shoot put a ring on it, ring, ring, ring. Start smaller and get a bra, because you look ridiculous in that dress. You know

how in below-deck Mediterranean they put on those terrible dining outfits that were like cut for their nipples. That's what she was wearing and it cost a lot of money. Get a bra for it. Start small, okay? Yeah. Well Thomas knows exactly how to shut her up. He's like, so Madison, Gwynn lady, so how's Katha and doing over here at Gwynns? And now she's like, ah, yeah, he's really terrible to Ashley, but she deserves it. So I like it, which just makes me sick, you know, and I like that in America. Okay, I know. And there was a part of me earlier in the season where I thought, you know, this Ashley

girl, she likes him, she's drawn into the situation, she's automatically like the bad guy because she's the other woman. And but I'm like, no, you know what, I'm gonna walk that back. She's more like, I gave her a shot to stand on her own. And no, terrible. She's a bad person because she's a bad person. Yeah. So Thomas is like, well, now that Catherine's grandma, Daad, I should probably give her

a call. And that's just, you've been doing that a lot lately. Mm-hmm. It's like that's the mother of his kids, of course. What else do you say? And how has nobody heard that Katherine's grandmother died? It's so weird that nobody on this show was heard. Madison's like, she had to miss a couple of dates.

Want me to drug test her? Her grandma died. Oh, all right. Well, I'm trying to remember if I bang to. I'll give Katherine a call and ask her. Now she's like, yeah, grass. I'm on a ring. She's the worst. Well, we have a special phone calling gloves for you over in the other and immense department, which like me to take you there. Well, I'd be lovely, Matt, I'm saying. And now a real kick in the Nets to Trixi Monaco. Instead of music, we get Craig's phone ringer,

his iPhone ringer that we both just love. Generic Apple ringtone. Duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, whatever it goes, I can't. Why can't we ever remember? Duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, no, that's better. It's the one that's, it sort of sounds like,

it's a low rant version of um, American, uh, what was that movie with Kevin Spacey and pie? Oh, American beauty. American beauty. Oh, I got one. I never think of things. So we're over at Craig's house and he's like taping over random holes. And Naomi calls up and she's like, yeah, um, I was wondering if I could come by and I was like, please say you're just in the neighborhood. Please, we haven't gotten that in forever. I know. No one's even said it. And Catherine has literally been driving around everybody's neighborhood in her scene. I know. She has a lot of scenes in the car where I know she's just,

she just happens to be in the neighborhood. Yeah. So she's like, yeah, I want to come over because I want to talk about things. I don't want to be as much of a bitch. Bye. Okay. And he's like, well, it's a little dirty over here. So don't judge me too bad. No, me. Yeah, it's pretty dirty. It's like a gorilla rap for us. And there's like a little tiny singer sewing machine, like a little kid's one on the ground.

I don't know what the hell he's been doing over there, but none of it looks healthy. It looks terrible. So Craig like calls up to Sean and is remade up the stairs. He's like, um, no, he's coming over So be careful and if you hear pineapple, that's my safe word. I know Crank apple. Oh, sorry. I know Craig. I'm still waiting for you to use it bra Pineapple sorry. I got a splinter. I'm scared His safe word has the word prick in it. Okay. And Sean's like, when he's like, Sean goes, yo, what's up?

I was like, okay, you two enough, enough of that. We see you. Okay. So Cameron is, yeah, here's where cameras eating a Costco-sized cheese puffs. When and she has eel fudge cookies on her, on her in her pantry. Well, maybe this will make you less hungry. She says uterus. I think that work. Oh, she's like, well, I feel I'm still pregnant and I feel constantly bloated and constantly

with the big poop. You just can't get out. I'm like, I feel that way often actually. No kidding. I think we are pregnant after watching this. I don't know. I'm like a little dumb. I'm like ready for this pregnancy

so we're aligned to move forward. I know in real life It doesn't work that way, but like Goodness do we like how many of these scenes we have to watch? I've heard like sitting on a ball on our house Well imagine how she feels. Oh god. Yeah, but no thanks I don't like to empathize at her point. I don't want to empathize with him. Yeah, we need to dress I want to empathize with somebody like rich happy and doesn't have cost of patience Okay, so she the good thing about chef is that even though you feel like you're gonna poop your brain out Or die and or die you'll still feel better than chef. So she talks to chef and she's like well

I don't really get out much just Eaton and want to die and he's, you should do like a puzzle or video games. Gars. Gars, Mario. Gars. She goes to the plumber. He grows. He has a job, grows.

Mario does not race on a golf course. Gars, even though there is Mario golf. I do take a shower every day. So I feel kind of human. Oh, does that work? He's like gosh, I ran into a glass door last night face first Garish gosh, it was like gosh crash gosh, just like imagine that Shep this is great. You're stressing me out more than the baby You know, I'm more disappointed in you than I am in pregnancy

Okay, I like that in society women are trying to break the glass ceiling and chefs just trying to break a glass door. It's like a lateral move. It really makes sense on this show. Look, a step is a step. Yeah. It's trying. So speaking of steps backwards, we have Austin, who's phone is also ringing with the generic ringtone. I'm just like going nuts right now going nuts But is it a sound effect that they replace their ringer or is it really that ringer because both of them have the echo of like their big empty houses? I Actually suspect that they are supposed to have their phone on vibrate when they're shooting and that post-production

puts the tone over it in In which case, come on post, like give us some creative ringtones. Yeah, because you know Apple will sue your ass in two seconds, won't they hear? Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, that's mine. Okay. I would be like, Sue, Sue, billion dollars and then they won't pay taxes on it and everybody will all be all up in arms. Okay, so Victoria is calling. She's like, are you gonna be back to try

some of this soup I'm making? And I don't know why. I don't know Victoria, but shut up Victoria and you're three days soup. Now yeah, I'm about to say, like, so I am and we both are avid people, avid cook people, cooking people, cookers, cook chefs, home cooks, love cook. Okay, and you know, people cookers, cook chefs, home cooks. Math cooks. Good loves to cook. Okay, and you know, one of the things I loved, I actually really love making soup. I think it's so fun.

You just add, set, touch around, and then you get like a stew. It's fun. It's nice. I like it. And I am one to be like, oh, are you gonna come over? I'm gonna, I'm making a soup.

Okay, a soup's on. But it's like that day. I would never say to someone three days out, are you gonna be home because on Friday, the soup is gonna be ready. Like that's a little extra. Yeah, that's a lot. That's a, you're too involved with your soup, okay?

That's a needy person. That's a needy soup. Yeah, it's a needy person, you know, who wants to like make sure you're gonna be there in three days for the soup they're starting today. Like you're a needy back off. days for the soup they're starting today. Like you're leading back off. Yeah, that's like a soup trap. It's almost like, well, if you're having a great time, you can't stay an extra day because

I've obligated you to a soup. You're stuck in the soup. And also, we've learned that Austin likes restaurants where he doesn't have to pay for stuff. He doesn't want a three day old soup. Yeah, that being said, I would like to know what soup it is. And I don't know why we didn't get any more information on it. We get like, what sort of soup do you think it is?

What sort of soup does Victoria make? Oh God, it's probably something like really low calorie. It's like tomato and I don't know, tomato with some noodles and some chicken. I feel like it's like an annoying soup like a barley, you know? Oh, I don't get garlic. I don't like that. I hate that. That makes soup like a barley, you know. I don't get a big brain. I hate that. That makes me like a little bit.

It's in it and it's like, oh, I've got my barley soup going. You're like, barley is the worst grain ever, by the way. I think it's fine. I just feel like a laks character. It's so chewy, so overly chewy. It's like, it's like a figure. Give me a bar. You know what?

Give me, give me like a bulgar. Give me a bulgar. Don't give me a barley. Yeah. Um, I, I'm agree. I'm with you on the bulgar. You know what I'm not with you on? Victoria, get out of here.

And then the obligation. Austin is not going to commit even to the soup. He's like, I'm going to try and he's like, last summer, Chelsea essentially cut me out of her lawy. And I don't want it to happen again. So and she's like, I'm gonna try and he's like, last summer, Chelsea essentially cut me out of her lawy and I don't want it to happen again. So, and she's like, tell Chelsea I said hello, and I was like, oh my God, how many women are they gonna bring in here

that we're gonna get mad at immediately for fucking with the women who are already here? Okay, you can't do this to us. Okay. Okay. And the thing is that Austin, he doesn't want to be, he, he, he, why did I write down that he doesn't want to be cut out of Chelsea's life? Because he said that.

He said last time she cut him out of her life when he started dating Victoria. So now he's hoping that she's better. So he can start dating Victoria again, but not get cut out of Chelsea's life. My habit, it's like, how about you, how about you don't date her friend, her soup loving friend, and then she won't cut you out of her life? Well, I don't know. You don't get to just date somebody and loving friend, and then she won't cut you out of her life. Well, I don't know. You don't get to just date somebody

and then take the whole town off the market. Well, no, but I mean, like, but like, that's fine, but like, what it means is, like, okay, you're dating me, but now you wanna date my friend, that's fine. I'm just not gonna talk to you anymore, which I think is a totally reasonable thing, you know why? Because it's hard to get over someone if you're in constant communication. You need like some buffer space alone. You need to have like a little bit of distance so you can sort of start to move on yourself. And so sometimes it's like, okay,

fine. You're going to do that. I'm not talking to you. Well, you can't have your Barley and eat it too. Okay. Celebrity beef. You never know if you're just just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasive. And I'm Sydney Battle. And we're the hosts of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity view, from the build up, why it happened,

and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up any time soon.

Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or wonder ya. Wondering out. Can if it's three days later. So next up is Naomi at Craigs. Now she's in crutches. What is happening to this cast? The entire cast is falling apart.

Sheep, sheep, he already needs knee surgery and now he's broken his nose. Cameron has like a stubborn cervix and now Naomi is showing up in a boot or crutches. Yeah, everybody's breaking down and Gismmo is, you know how cats run away when they're gonna die? I think Gizmo's running away just in case she died because like everyone's so unhealthy, you know,

and so he won't fall or into the house and she's like, come here Gizmo, not that way, this way. Hurry up! Well, I thought the entire thing was impressive because cats are not known for, you know, just like, you put them down like, you put them down without... You put them down in the wild and they stay with you. Normally, you put a cat down and a neighborhood doesn't know.

It's gone. The fact that Gizmo even made himself into Craig's house was impressive. And also, it warmed my heart. It was like all the Gizmo I needed. I know. Craig was so happy. So he's happy and kisses the cat and stuff and he's like I got you a low-wrench. He's played and she's like I broke my foot And he's like gizmo and that's the most love I've ever seen in this relationship is Craig in that cat Oh my god the way that gizmo was pressed up against that glass door like

And then like Craig picks up gizmo and they're reunited. It was so adorable. And he's like, sorry for that big hole in the wall. We had a demo party. I was like, there's like one tiny hole. I think even we were parties are lazy. What did you demo? That's what I said also. What did you basically made a made a small hole?

You didn't even punch through. You just sort of like carved a hole. Was it a demo? Were you actually, was it actually a music demo? Were you actually like, yeah of like carved a hole. Was it a demo? Were you actually a music demo? Were you actually like, yeah, we had a demo. I'm like, we had a band in here and they got wild because that would make more sense with you. It wasn't even a hole. It was just some wild paper scratched off a circle. So she's like, she's trying to be really nice. So she's like, cool. When you know she's inside, she's like, God like God damn it Craig you fucking idiot.

Yeah, this is what you're up wallpaper what the fuck is that supposed to do me of that? Naomi has never shown so much self-control like she's learning her lessons from Peyton and she's like okay just pretend the wall is Peyton and you're making good and the wall is at as at Nico and you can't be mean to the wall or to Craig right now just just be nice So she brought gizmo's a piece offering And she's like I just want to be nice and not have an elephant in the room Which is so real housewives of Atlanta

Yeah, so I wanted to see that on this show she brought a cat in the room instead So they're just like talking and of course I'm not listening to anything because I'm just watching gizmo and at one point like Craig is like playing with Gizmo with this like this string and he's like He's like waving the string back and forth. He gives me like And then this ad appears on the bottom of the screen that says like America's Got Talent premiering on Tuesday, and I was like this could not be more perfect because like honestly If one of the acts on America's got talent was Craig just the piece of string with Colonel Gizmo, I would be like I'm voting for him. I'm voting.

Oh, I would. I mean, it would be a decent act on that show. But I have some crazy stuff on that show. So this is funny because Naomi's like, well, I'm really trying to be kind of Craig and he's just playing with the string. Yeah. I'm trying to be kind of Craig and he's like, it's a string. God damn it Craig.

I just wanted to like jump on him and grab his thread. Craig and Gizmo are both competing to who can bat the string first. They're both like both they're like Gizmo's paw Craig's hand at both like battling for turf. So she picked up Gizmo and Gizmo is like, she's like, he's has to me three times today, he's being a dick crag. Gizmo, I'm sorry, but like, you're just not making life choices right now that I can support. Like, this is not the cat that I fell in love with. She's got a location tracker on Gizmo.

I would too, that cat. I love the cat. So next up, everybody's packing to go to Hilton Head. Yeah, she's putting something on his nose, Catherine's with her Louis Vuitton's, which is, you know, again, hilarious with her janky. And then she's actually putting makeup on Thomas. I thought, that's what I thought at first,

but then I think it was like moisturizer or something. She's like, I'm giving you what? I'm giving you a facial. So Ashley or she didn't say facial. She said you'd be an esthetician or something like that. So Ashley, they're packing and she's like, I want a Louis Vuitton case. That's what I want.

I want a Louis Vuitton suitcase. I'm like, well, Cap well Catholic has five ask her for some when your friends that's guys such a prick such a prick also actually why do you need Louis Vuitton suitcase why go get like go get go get like it just something a brand she's fucking Varuk assault from Willy Wonka I want it. All she does is walk around, pointing at things she want and saying, I want it now. Listen, you did nothing, okay?

I know that sleeping with Thomas is disgusting and horrifying, but you don't get a medal for it. No, you get something much worse. Yes, you get disease and, you know, a very difficult life. Disease in a difficult life. Two of the same things sometimes. So Ashley now, she disease in a difficult life. Two of the same things sometimes.

So Ashley, Ashley is now, she's in a bitchy mood about Catherine. She's like, well, she's a real wild card. You know, I'm giving her a sudden accident, even though she doesn't have one, I'm going to try to roll back that accent. Roll it back. Well, it's only a matter of time before she makes one up. You know, she's the type. She's like, I know there's a birthday for saying, and I know I haven't received my invite yet

I'm like you should be so happy. Okay, to me, you know what? Hell is going to a two-year-old's birthday. All right. I would be like no invite hell. Yes I'm gonna go do something like walk around someplace in curse where I'm allowed to you know I just like that it's they're being so immature at a party for someone called saint Like she's such a little bitch about it She's like I have no respect for someone not mature enough to extend and invite you know you're a Trampi girlfriend is trying to start shit. You are not a wife You're not a partner or a fiance get the fuck out. You're lucky that those kids even get to see you

Yeah, she's like she should send it in, invite. That's the classy thing to do. Am I right? Now can I have a ring please? Class, hashtag class. Yeah. I want Lou Vuitton, Lou Vuitton bag as well. Yes, and Thomas of course is like,

well I'm on Catherine side, but I just look at her and I say, mm-hmm, I did that a lot in Mayerhands, Mayerhands, politics. Little lot. I was like, that's what, you know, when I see on Netflix, they have a show called the 3% and whenever it comes on the suggested shows, I'm like, wow, even that show got more votes in Thomas. And it's not even in English. Believe it or not, if you go back to the episodes, remember, I was endorsing Thomas. I was

like, people should vote for him. He is an outsider. He's speaking the truth, not the truth, but he's just speaking his mind as close to politician. Oh, words, I regret. Well, it doesn't matter. He didn't get elected. But, you know, he's a fucker because here's the situation. This one is going off on Catherine and Thomas could just like, listen, stop getting all wrapped up about it. She feels a certain sort of way, take the higher road, just like relax. It's not a big deal, you know, but instead he's just like, you know, uh, uh, uh, letting her just go crazy. The point where now she's going to make a fool of herself. But he's not just letting her. He's trying to rile her up. He's like, after it's got Louis

Vuitton. And then it just gets worse as the episode goes on. And Ashley's like, I'm, I don't like being excluded. And I can be her best ally or her worst enemy. And if she excludes me, it's gonna be a problem. Don't worry, we're gonna talk more about this in the car. I like what you said that. It's like coming up on Ashley, Thomas is like, where is the remote? Where can I change the channel on Ashley?

I don't want to watch the Ashley show anymore. Don't worry, I'm on all the networks now in the car. I never should have paid for something called serious. So then Catherine is, the girls basically all meet up. Yeah, they get in the SUV. And there was this weird moment. They get in the SUV and they get in the road. And they're like, so Chelsea, how did you find this house? And there was this weird moment. They, they get in the SUV and they get in the road

and they're like, so Chelsea, how did you find this house? She goes, well, I got on the old Google and then they like show a flashback of her on a laptop. I was like, was this really a necessary moment? Do we need a flashback right now? Do we need, do we need Googling to be illustrated for us? I wonder how much of that footage is just Chelsea? Like, well, I guess I'll go on the Google.

I'm like, all right, it's like three hours of footage It's just her every day Like hey have you happy you know what I haven't had in a little longest time EL Fudge cookies do they still make this I guess I'll go on the Google Hey, you know what I want to throw a tire. I'm gonna I'm gonna go on the Google and look for one of them one of them brick classes Hey, I wonder that a question in center that I was raised on still in business. I'm gonna go on the Google and look for one of them one of them brick classes Hey, I wonder that a questionry and center that I was raised on still in business. I'm gonna go on the Google Bravo is really trying to push horses on us this year. Yeah, okay, so the girls meet then the boys meet over and the boys are just like so good Oh boy, they're good man. We're getting by

Can you fit those golf clubs in the car? I don't know if they'll fit. That's what she said. A broke my nose. Yeah, it's all that stuff. They're all arriving. Basically, I have Patricia's slash witness and they're just getting into. We just, you're an old woman. Okay, those jokes don't work for you anymore. Give them my old lady.

And they all pile into Whitney's little Prius, which is hilarious. So meanwhile, Catherine's talking about St. Party, and she's like, well, he's really earned into train. So I thought I'd call it the St. Turnin' To-To Party. They're like, aww, and then like, cut to actually being like, and another thing, okay? I know that if we threw St. Departee Party,

I know that if I was eating someone, or like, if she was eating someone, that you'd say bring him, bring him, bring him, bring whoever. He's like, bring him ever. Woo, maver, whoever, bring it. He's like, you know, he's just like, oh my God, how do I turn her down? Thomas would not say bring him ever. He just started letting Catherine see her own kids. Give me a break. And then Thomas as classy as ever is like, she's

like a dog with a bone. She just won't. And then Thomas as classiest ever is like, she's like a dog with a bone. She just won't, Mayor Hans, let it, Mayor Hans go. My first act of smell of this town is to take toys from dogs. So they can't have something to not let go of. First act of my as mayor of Ravin L town, not the one that I don't own but a Ravenel town in my brain No more dogs just cats because they can't have hold on to a bone. That's what I say She's like I want you to hear me Thomas. He's like I hear you, but I have kids to raise. I want to be steady Okay, yeah, so the girls The girls talking about the boys and they're like, do you think the boys are on the road?

And Naomi says, I can tell you guys to have a location. He's at the liquor store. Shocker. Yeah, I love that she's still talking with it. And he hasn't figured it out. So Craig is 40 minutes late and they're all getting annoyed and Austin's like, Austin's like, now it's like, I don't know how, I don't know, I'm in a doubt with this. I'm like, you know, every single week you have a little comment like that. But it goes back and forth. It's like, now's like I don't know how I only dealt with this I'm like, you know every single week you have a little comment like that I'm like but it goes back and forth. It's like now I see why Craig is now. I'm sorry to see Craig side I know I don't know how many so like dealt with this like shut up

Mr. Beer maker Austin's a real fucker. Did you see him yell it Chelsea on Twitter? No, he said he was like well, I guess you say this you say that. And I guess we were never real friends. And a chef was like, whoa, I never really take anything seriously. The people say on TV, gosh, I'll show pretend he's the chill one and he is not sir. And his mouth is still moving from that tweet. It was like three weeks.

Wow. So Craig has Craig is now joining in on the injury parade. He's like, uh, he's like, yeah, I like, I caught my attendant and I can't move my pinky, which is too bad because I can do a lot of pinky gestures today. And I can't do it. So I have to have surgery on Friday. And it was you know that Naomi said a million times, God, you won't even lift your little finger.

He's like, look, I can do it. Oh, I got it. My little finger. I'm like, how'd you do that? He says, I was dabbed a butter knife into a ball. I tried to do it. Oh I got it. My little finger. I'm like, how'd you do that? He says I was dabbed a modern knife into a Whitney and Whitney goes When he goes why'd you do that? He's like, oh, I'm being stupid. I was like, you know, it's funny Is that like Whitney as much shit as we talk about Whitney? He is quietly the voice of reason in these situations

He's like, why would you do that I know that's what so that's so good about this set the guy with a band called Reno is the voice of reason so step of course his answer is like gosh Craig you need to get your rocks off and you're not going to it Naomi in the house. Oh, just get off, Garse. Get Garse off. So then Austin's thank you. Oh, Garse, that's Garse. That's it. That's it. Garse. Garse. Garse. Garse. Chris. Oh, my just Garse. I just garseed all over my EL Fudge is Garse. So Austin, Austin is like apparently texting Chelsea from the from the backseat.

And he's like, the conversation in this car is really sucks. Is that the conversation your car? She's like, well, I guess he's texting me hasn't texted me for two weeks. Guess now he is. Now we're in the house again. So he's going to start texting, trying to get a little free cascus apple off. Matray, which by the way, it sounds pathetic when she says it because we know that he just said to Victoria that he's her boyfriend now, but he is gonna try. Like, you see him warming up later. He's like trying to kind of have his arm around her on the box.

Yeah, exactly. And so Naomi is quick to try to kill that. She's like, oh, did you know that like he's dating on Victoria again? Yeah, I ran to Victoria. She's going on day with him. Yeah, apparently she's making her soup whatever that means. I don't know and Chelsea's like I don't Okay I don't Girl I don't care my girl girl girl girl girl girl girl I'm a girl girl daddy. I'm a girl girl They're like hey remember that time when Austin got startled by a dandelion. Oh, yeah, that okay great. That just killed it for me. Thank you so much Okay, so that Craig is oh no, it's probably gonna say the same thing

It's the voice in the car and Austin's like I mean Craig is like so would you take would you take Chelsea back if she wanted you like Chelsea was a one Like he was the one who broke up with Chelsea, which is hilarious And he's like no, don't I deserve someone that wants me? I'm like you're the one who was dating Chelsea and then start dating her best friend like What what what what what what sort of reaction do you expect from her? And just like whoa, that's a good saying. I'm gonna make a coosie of that What sort of reaction do you expect from her? It's just like, whoa, that's a good saying. I'm gonna make a Koosie of that. What's good about a Koosie is that a Nali keeps your beers cold,

but if you put her on your wrist, it protects your wrist because the way I'm going, gosh. So Thomas and Ashley in their car is like, look, there's a little town here. She goes, do you own it? Yeah, because the town's called a Ravenel. He's like, I don't own it. She goes, I would have the perfect name if I married you.

He goes, what's that? Ashley Ravenel. He's like, these two deserve each other, okay. And she's such a dumb piece of wood, okay? Like what a stupid thing to say. You think she's leading up to something like interesting, like Ashley, Pierimont, Beauregard, Ravenel, but she's just like, Ashley Ravenel. I'm like, oh, that's all you were, that's, that's where you're going with it.

You just can put his name after yours. Okay. Simple, simple, broth. So she's like, she's like, Thomas, can you just like, I just want you to defend me. Okay, I just like went like went there, if they gang up on me, just, I want you to have my back. I want you to defend me. And he's like, can't we all just get along? Which, he doesn't hear with Bravo. Twice in a year.

Okay, what was more awkward? Thomas saying Rodney Kings, can we all just get along? Or Tamar Judge saying Rodney Kings, can we all just get along or Tamra judge saying Rodney Kings, can we all just get along? All I know is that I Just felt awkward. I just all I know is that I was like I'm I'm just I I just want to like throw my face into a pack of ELF I just and hope this goes away Y'all thought Justin Hope this goes away. Y'all thought they shouldn't be allowing those little Kebler elves into our country. It's a name like that.

Build a war. Build a Kebler. It's called the thud. It's called the thud. It's not elves thud. So Ashley's like, I love you so much, Thomas. God I love you so much. I mean, you make me crazy, but crazy attracts crazy.

And he goes, apparently. Anyway, let me get my carabiner for when we climb Hilton Head Mountain. but crazy attracts crazy and he goes apparently Anyway, let me get my carabiner for when we climb Hilton head mountain, okay Island, oh, I thought it was a mountain. It's called Hilton head island I thought it was a mountain island like Hawaii's I like that her anger from the rest of the episode stems from not knowing what to pack girl you you're gonna wear the same torn up black jeans and a really tight white shirt with the bra that goes through you wear it everywhere where are you gonna change now? That will now I'm trying to realize why the editors showed a shot of Chelsea googling something because that's exactly what Ash is incapable

of like hey, Hilton head What's it like at Hilton head maybe you should Google it? Hey, what do you wear if you go horseback riding? Maybe you should Google it, you know, she just hears head and figures. She's a pro Okay, so chef's like oh my god, I'll finally be accepted by the Paris. Yeah, finally my dream Just what just what it maristed Paris. Yeah, finally my dream just what just what it bear is it. So Chelsea is like, I mean, not Chelsea. Chef's like, oh, look, here we are in Hilton. It's where I grew up. There's something ideal like being a walk away from the beach.

And then it's just like a trip through white male privilege from here on out. Like he was the sweetest spokesperson for white male privilege ever. He really is. And that's actually my favorite type of ship when he's being the most whitest maleist privileges because that's what we signed up for with this show. We want to see rich white people being crazy rich white assholes. That's what we're here for.

Yeah. And then also the Chelsea's in the world. She's like this is a slow time I think cuz I grew up in the country. I'm more chill We didn't have much, but we had a good time I'm Chelsea. I just always feel like she's on one of those rocking chairs outside the cracker barrel like One day I'm gonna tell my grand you the story on this thing We're gonna have these chicken and dumplings They're gonna taste just the same. Hey don't forget to return that book on tape. I don't want to be charged extra

Hey waitress, I think this fish needs a little more gas. I think I just heard a die. You're an asusius restaurant room Oh, Chelsea. She's a recluse Chelsea recluse Oh, Chelsea. Big Miss Chelsea. Chelsea, I'm sick and tired of having sex in the back of recreational vehicles just kidding. I love it. I'm glad you're here. So now they're they arrive at this, they're in Bluffton and they're at their Airbnb and they're picking rooms and all that stuff.

It's a typical. I'm the girl sharing rooms, which is very anti-real housewives. It's a refreshing, refreshing thing to see. I know It was funny to watch Naomi hobble up the stairs. She's like just give me 15 minutes. I'll be there and Ashley and Thomas come in and And I was just like wow look at this view. You're gonna marry me in and Thomas is staring at himself in the mirror pointing and putting his fingers here and say, I'm like, hey you. She's in a suit with a beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, Kalevoo from K, I'm K. And so she's like,

so I guess either Thomas says, ready to go horseback ride with a girl, say something about horseback riding, the topic is broached and reached broached whatever. Chelsea, because Chelsea's really making an effort to be nice to her. She does. Yeah. She's like is is Catherine here? We have a fireplace. How romantic all it is so romantic. And Chelsea instead of knocking her over the head with a you know row and I'll stay a row or a candle stick. Okay, that's a matter or or or or bet an or banister

like from Craig's house. Yes, and say to that She's like hey there. Hey there. Ash you want to come horseback riding with us? She's like I guess I have to figure out what to wear for horseback riding Thomas what do I wear for horseback riding? Oh, where's the love and what what am I supposed to wear? I mean It's a horse. It's a awesome God I mean it's a horse Thomas. It's a horse. Thomas, it's a horse. I need to have to my back right now. Because guess what?

Guess what? I wasn't riding that horse. I know what? You know what? At least some horse invites me. At least some horse invites me. Okay, because I'm not apparently invited to a wheelchair, but I'm invited to go horseback riding.

And animals. What about a horseback? I was like a dragon mouse. Like a gown. Should be Chanel. Listen to me. He's like Pino Grigio. What a great relationship. What a stupid worthless piece of tinfoil.

How do you like, okay, I am not an outdoors person. I'm not a horseback rider. What do you wear to ride horse? I don't know. Put on some jeans. How about that? Use some common sense. Jeans and a t-shirt. You can do that. Yeah, she's like, I wasn't prepared for this. And Patricia's just at home like, Put on some jeans. How about that? Use some common sense jeans and t-shirt. You can do that. Yeah I wasn't prepared for this and Patricia's just at home like

Queens but forgot to show her the t-shirts You know there was like a package from queens that was like sitting on Ash's doorstep and Patricia was like, Michael intercept the package and bring it. Intercept that flannel and have it burned at the stake at Ptu. It's Patricia's version of Ctu from 24. She's like, we have a package of jeans and a t-shirt that's perfect for horseback riding. We need you to intercept the package. We'll put a hot perimeter around it. Thank you, Michael. Ding, ding, ding, ding.

Hello, this is Patricia. Now listen here, Jack Bauer. You're acting reckless. And then your age should be married with a nice wife at home. You're never going to save America from terrorists if you don't keep the American pie in America, Tom. Jack Ble. Jack Bowler is like, all right Patricia, I've made it into

twins. Tell me what I have to do. All right, we have a Madison at three o'clock at three o'clock. All right, I've just told us a woman dressed in architectural square designs. That's the owner's daughter. Jack, now if you see in the back of the store there's a little door and if we go through there there's an awkward interview hat taking place, I got it, I'm right on top of it. Go, bankrupt Thomas and make his hole look like us. Hore that he is.

I haven't burned at the stake just like we used to. Patricia, I'm going dark, there are too many hot cells and winds. When David Trisha will rid this town of Spinsters. Patricia is very much the C2 bureau crat, like not saying that she's bureaucratic, but she's the one who's always in the office that's like above the floor, you know, looking down. Like, like, you have to do something where Patricia doesn't see, you know. Yeah, Whitney's been helping Thomas, you know, get this hope around in a golf card. She's like, I see you. Do you think that I don't see what you're doing? I have a line open to the president of the United States.

Yeah, she's like, she's the hardass for the first half of the season. And second half, you realize that she's like, actually has a good heart. And she's going to, she's like, guess what? I'm going to get on that plane and ride that nuke into a mountain and on me, I'm in Michael, you're gonna go Michael. Ding, ding, ding, ding, he's like, I need you to do, I need some more, I need another martini, even afterwards,

could you fly this, you can go to the mountain, thank you. And that was the end of a lentia. Okay, okay, come back, come back to the five and dime. into the mountain. Thank you. And that was the end of a lens here. Okay, okay, come back. Come back to the five and done. Anything, anything. So Catherine, everyone here is hashly like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, I want it now, daddy. I want to do both of them. So Catherine's like, I have these boots. Thomas bought it for me two years ago.

One of the only things he bought me. Like, plus those five Louis Vuitton back. I mean, look, Thomas is done you wrong, okay? But you did pay for your Amazon Prime for a long time. And what about you? Got like a heap of Louis Vuitton behind you. And what about that strange like Magneto cradle that you had that was like all like plastic, you know? Yeah, like like like yeah, that big Climax or whatever. So Baby terrarium So everyone's like arriving and finally Catherine and Ash have to come face to face downstairs and

Cath like Ash is like hi And Cath is like hi nice to see you. Um, hi Thomas tells Catherine. I'm eating pizza. Oh, I love those boots I remember getting for you You want a drink and she's like Thomas you know, it's Thomas is such a pig my god. She goes you know I don't drink and he's like, huh? They pass by Ashley and she's like well great. Thanks. Thanks guys. Thank you. Look at our room Look at our room, Katherine. He ever seen one of these things. It's a dimmer switch Garsh room with a view classic American literature right there.

Garsh. Dimmer. It's a dimmer. And she's like, do you use it for a mood dimmer? Ha ha. And then they have their weird chemistry thing, which always makes me uncomfortable. Look, I can, I cannot be on both of your teams. Yeah. So the girls go outside, they're drinking beers, hanging out and she's like, I love being excluded Oh, now here's the thing you know

I have a soft spot for for people when they're excluded I'm always like that's not fair. So I should be excluded, you know But this girl's kind of bringing it on herself if you don't want to be excluded just go out and sit with them Monch make an effort, okay? Yeah And she's like do you know that I like how she's strong these together? She goes I love being excluded Thomas Did you notice everyone else has flannel? Like I didn't get the memo like apparently it was like a flannel memo. Thanks twins. Thanks twins next time Okay next time she's being like fabric shaped which I love that I love how her flannel crazy little

Little works. This is the first time flannel has flannel is finally having its revenge because you know Flannel is like oh flannel flannel either it's like it's for lesbians with it like oh it's a bro and flannel and now flannel is like that's right Jamie the bitch from California Flattel wins It's like I don't ride horses Tom is help and he goes well Do you have riding boots which is so cold because he just rolled caster and I remember those boots. Yeah. Yeah.

That's right. Oh my god. Every line that comes out of this guy's mouth and she's like, no, did you hear what I just said? I've never got horseback riding. That it becomes her screaming and then outside the girls here and are laughing and they help me. That's a warning sign arguing in front of other people.

I mean, I used to beat Craig just to loan it home, but when I found myself looking for a big, heavy, butter dish to slam over the top of his head at restaurants, I knew we were in danger. I mean, is there anything more pathetic about arguing over flannel? I don't think so. Let's just walk around to her and say equestrian more.

Yeah, I'm surprised girls were like, oh my God, your flannel shirt is so great my god, your flannel shirt is so great. No, your flannel shirt is so great. I love that we're all wearing appropriate flannel for today's activities. God, I don't love anything more than soft, cottony clothes with squares on it. Woo!

Thomas! Thomas, I need to have my back. I need to have my back. Flannel emergency. Flannel emergency. I'm inside you here Ashley I don't call either and rather sit by a bull and he's like Catherine has her boots a bottle and she goes um cool Cool Thomas like she didn't get it the first ten times. She tried to knock her over the head with it

So they all they all leave the the house to go on their excursions and all the girls like taking photos together without Ashley And she's like to go on their excursions and all the girls like taking photos together without Ashley and Ashley's like, again, very Jamie Grootsy, but like worse, like a worse, like well, Jamie Grootsy is a lovely person, I'm sure, but I'm just saying the characters that she plays are always like, you know, excluded from the photos. Anyway, I'm getting ahead of myself. So, so they're taking photos. I guess they're using this Polaroid camera and that has some sort of like setting, some like outdoor setting. Oh, no, I'm old.

Yeah, and Chelsea's like, yeah, I'll send you this to me. I guess, you know, since I bought every meal for him for a year, I guess they could not think for him to do is get me a Polaroid camera. I guess this is payback. There's nothing better than hearing a bitchy line from somebody sounds like Forest Gump. It's so fun. Like a Forest Gump was a bitch. I love when Chelsea shades people

It actually it's like what you said. It's like very satisfying hearing like a like a like a forest gum shape Swom cod or she got there all this corn for us You know, I probably was dinner at the time, but why not? was dinner at the time, but why not? I guess this counts as the equivalent of having 30 dinners paid for the stupid polar hood camera they can only use once a year, because he's going to carry around a big, white chunk of camera. So then Ashley's like, come here, Thomas. So they're on the front of the boat doing the most basic white thing ever.

Where the king of the world? He's like, well, Jack and Rose, the front of the boat doing the most basic white thing ever He's like, well, Jack and Rose the king of the world. I love she was babe babe. Who am I? Oh God, who's the bad one on the robot? Not her never do her and she's like babe. This would be the perfect place to propose he's like well where is Catherine anyway then I could finally have that a most amazing name ever Ashley Ravenel oh look at that I just saw a seal go up and down may a hands may a ham she goes babe don't and then an amazing interlude Craig and Naomi Craig is trying to be like nice at Naomi because No, they're supposed to be nice

So Craig walks up and he's tonight on me. He's like um Because um, I found these by the way. These yours their contacts. They're in my overnight bag And I mean, it's like I've never seen the before my life Craig. She's like um Well, I was concentrating on not forgetting those contacts because like you always were always like short of them and she's like Craig It's just a contact lens case. He's like, um, I guarantee that they're like other contacts in there. She's like, uh Craig You get contacts in a prescription box, but I guess you don't know that The fact that they're arguing over this and she is just like couldn't even contain a ridge of that But don't you see why she wants to kill him?

I mean, he says things like this. But it says 8800 contacts on the, it says it. So there has to be contacts in there. It says it. She's like, it's like, look, and I found this other thing for you, this when you have these, you will always have contacts in your eyes forever. Craig, that is a sign up form for constant contact. It's not the same thing, but no,

I'm pretty sure for your eyes. I brought you this film, Majodi Foster. I'm not watching contact either, okay? Oh, I got you. I got you this magazine. Apparently, I'll teach you how to like put your contacts in. Craig, that's three to one contact magazine. It's not the same thing. I think you I got you this magazine apparently will teach you how to like put your contacts and Craig That's three to one contact magazine. It's not the same thing. I think you left your roach killer here God damn it. That's contacts roach killer So she's Austin and Chelsea are just watching them as you do because I mean Craig He's gonna make this big thing they're gonna have a big thing over a contact case He found around the house. So she got he's God, he's a dopey dog, huh? And just like you can help love and though.

Let me go see if they just fight. I'm glad that's not our problem. Kimo Savi. And she's like, God, I can't believe you just said that to me. He has a smirk of a man who knows he's getting soup in three days. Meanwhile, over the labspeaker, you hear? Okay, and on this, on this corner of the White Privilege ocean, I worked over there. I rented boats to people and sat on a beach all day.

This is amazing. That was the best job I ever had. It was also the last job I ever had. Gosh. That was amazing. And Chelsea's like, I was about to say that was amazing. Jinx. By the way, you also, you know, by the way, that like Craig is clearly at some point during

this little weekend getaway or weekday getaway. He's going to find like a seashell and give it to know me, right? He's like, um, well, I found you a shell and I thought of you. So I thought I'd give this to you. Like Craig, that's a hypothermic needle. Needle. Hypothermic. It's a cold needle.

Needle. It's a flip flop. I thought you liked it. It says flip flop on it. Craig, it's a rock. It's a can, Greg. It's an old can. So it's like a rock. I love that war. I read about it every night before I go to bed.

All quiet on the Western Front is a great book. Everyone should read it right now. Gosh, everybody should take their time on their beautiful docks that they're being raised on to just read a little bit, you know? Ah, isn't it nice that all of us can take the time in the middle of the week to go on vacation. There's a week because Victoria said we get home on Thursday. Soup's on. Thanks, Daddy Earth. So the boat docs and the boys and the girls separate in golf carts and then

chef is going again. Okay. And here here's where I grew up because I grew up on my golf course. My mom went holler, hey, comfort dinner, Gars. And my grandmother was a two-time golf champ, and a character in the great Gatsby was named after my grandma. The character in great Gatsby by F. Scott's Fitzgerald, named Jordan Baker, that's my aunt's. I still can't look at my grandma's pictures without thinking,

Gars, Leo DiCaprio really deserved better. I can't play Zelda without thinking about my aunt. Oh, Gars. So, Thomas is only when he can't golf. Shocker. And Austin is the only one dumb enough to laugh at Thomas. I don't know what Austin's game is one dumb enough to laugh at Thomas. I don't know what Austin's game is, but he's really coming up the big boy, he's coming up against the big boys and his life will be ruined soon.

Yeah, well, it's funny. They're all golfing and Whitney, of course, being the rebel that he is, the leader of Renobs, he's in like some cool denim jacket with like a black t-shirt and like black denim jeans Everyone else is in like golf clothing. I was like, ooh Whitney such a rebel, you know while you're playing golf He's an excellent golfer. It's like well. Yeah, of course mother sent me to golf class The second I the second I got my second master's in violin playing Did you see that's a montage that's anything of Whitney going mother? Is that where you got it from I think so I was wondering if it actually came from the show and it just kept going or if it I never know what we're making up and what's coming from the show these days it all because blends it

Yeah, because you the clip is from like season one when he's talking to Cameron about psycho And he's like you know psycho right? She's like what you know, psycho right? She's like, what? You know, like, Norman Bates, like, mother. Oh, my God, he actually did it. Yeah. I think he actually did it. You see, these things are inspired by real things. We take one, one funny thing and beat it over the head for 10 years. Yeah. Exactly. So now the girls are over at the horses and, you know, not to be outdone by Shep and his childhood rearing on various beaches and golf courses. Shels is like, well, my mom had an equestrian Santa

growing up, so I just rode horses and guess what? I began to stay championed equestrian. Yeah. And the army's like me too. So everyone has basically grown up doing every activity this weekend. No, it's gonna be like, yeah, I actually grew up in a golf cart.

So like turned out, I was a really good golf car driver. Cameras, babies just going to come out of a golf hole. Like, finally, that's the only way these children can be born in this group. Yeah. So back with, so we're cutting back and forth between the horses and, uh, and golfing. And we see very quickly Trab is in, uh, he, Trab is in like a golf car with Whitney and he's complaining about Ashley saying well she's She's just real. I feel she's just in Todd. I'll just in Todd a little brat. I'm like okay. Well, he said you know young women that so entitled Yeah Because men because because like like wealthy white men in the South are not entitled at all not at all

Well, they fell entitled to entitled young all. You're not at all. Well, they fell entitled to entitled young women. You see, it's a circle of entitlement that you just never get out of. So the back of the horse is the horse lady. It's like, ladies, are there any nervous riders, which we learned from real housewives of Beverly Hills when Lee Sherman. We learned that you can't be nervous on a horse and Asher's like, well, I just want to make sure this horse is patient. Listen, I'd be a nervous rider too if my my steed were Thomas Rapinel. So they're riding at sunset. It's beautiful and sweet Chelsea's like, Chelsea, how are you doing? And Ashley's like,

Uh-huh, hey. She's just an asshole. And the girls are actually trying to be nice to her. And Chelsea is now trying to lose her shit a little bit because she wants to, she wants to take the horse up to a trot, you know, they're sort of just like walking. Can't, can't, and Chelsea, can we do a trot. And so Jody, Jody, who is the horse leader, she turns to Ashton. Ashley, are you ready to feel free? She's like, does that

mean I can't be kept anymore? That means your neck is about to be broken. Are you ready? Go towards the light, Ashley. And Ashton's like, um, no, I don't want to try and so it's like sorry girls we all have to walk like uh Chelsea gives her the Chelsea gives her the out she's like well I guess we're done and then Ashley doesn't say anything sick I just run to go home I'm telling Thomas to sell his horses Catherine's like well there's a way to get a ticket out of here so then we go back to golfing and to that. That's being married to Thomas is like being on below that where you're just waiting to fuck up and get a plane ticket home. Like captain sitting up there. Well, yeah, yeah,

total. Yeah, boss Thomas around one too many times. God damn it. Here's your plane ticket. Get the hell off my boat. Exactly. There's a lot of buffing and shaming that goes into Thomas. Okay, sorry to I didn't interrupt you. No, no, no, I like interrupted you like that 45 times this episode. Do you find ways to bring Captain Lee into it? You got to do it. God damn it. So Trab is golfing.

First of all, also he has a big ol' ass, a big ol' pillow. It looks like there's like a body pillow that's been crammed into those white jeans. Stop trying to make me like Thomas. I look at those white jeans. Stop trying to make me like Thomas. I look to those, and ask. Yeah, so then they're saying, they're like, so Thomas, how much have you spent on, or they're asking something about like, how much have you spent on Ashley? We have to ask you a lot of money.

And he's like, well, you know women. They all cost a lot of money. God, this is disgusting. Craig's like, oh, well, Thomas, be careful. And then we cut to Craig. He's just like looking at his nails and the interview. Like his collar is fully flat, like an unhired collar and he's like looking at his nails. He's like, oh, no, she's a goldinger.

So just make sure his intense, her intense sense are clear. And then he tells Thomas lenses. He tells Thomas, remember, I'm the one who warned you about Catherine, the only one really nice Craig, okay, you've been a very good friend to Catherine until now, you fukker. Yeah, exactly. So, so now women are done with their horseback riding. It does make a good point. I'm sorry, Ben, but he does make a good point. Because he goes, she's gonna try and get pregnant

to seal the deal, but Catherine already tried that twice and it didn't work. Yeah. Ding, ding, ding. That's true. So now the, now the women are taking a golf cart, this big golf cart thing back from the horseback riding to going to the restaurant.

And Ashley like volunteers to sit all the way in the back. She's like, I just like it back here. I'm gonna watch out for bears. and then like it was like, okay, she's like, it was a joke you guys. Clearly I'm not that funny. It's like, no, no. Well, sorry, yeah, everyone thinks that you could really think that. Like that's what's so scary.

It would be funny if you weren't so goddamn stupid. Yeah, just because you have Terry Garza here does not mean that you're funny. Okay. So at dinner, the girls were I first and there's a sign outside that says no crying a cat a wall in Or catable I you know I saw the sign and I saw it was I went by too quickly and I was like I I'm just not gonna go back to look at it because otherwise this can be another 15 minutes of me like Bitching about something on the podcast

So then they see the boys walk in and Chelsea goes, look, it's all the X's. And they have it's like, God, what were we thinking? Yeah, and so Ash is like, like, so did you have a good time? Who was by she's like, no, no, it wasn't fun at all. It was like awful. I didn't like it. And first I thought she was being like funny.

Like, I hated it. I was terrible, but like, deprecating, but she was just like, mm-hmm. I don't like it. I don't know why we have horses that we have cars now, okay? Yeah, my horse sucks, okay? I kept trying to pull me a different way. It's like the driver doesn't suck the car sucks Okay, stupid. I think the horse felt okay. Yeah, I mean you on top of it and you're terrible outfit Yeah, you're not appropriate horseback riding out of it. The horse is like she might as well be wearing a ball gun

Did she even go to goons? Has she ever heard of an equestrian center? So Thomas orders a drink and he wants some sort of bourbon and like some rata that we do have makers mark and Thomas like, Oh, I do like the red head. I could do some red head. I like the red head and everyone's like, Oh, I'll swallow a red head, hey, give me that red head, I'll knock it right off. You give me that red head, I swear, I didn't pregnant, I lock it so much. I do it two times over and give it some rotten boots. And everyone's cringing.

Well, at least they have the sense now to cringe, because usually they're just pretending everything's normal and we're crazy for thinking he's a pig, you know? Yeah, but now they're full on cringing So then they're like well chef is like gosh well, let's cheer us today and the things that we did and stuff and to everyone Cheers and was like cheers and Chelsea just turns to us like are you saying Victoria? He's like oh Let's talk about that. Oh, well, and she just gets so mad hashtag soup

about that. And she just gets so mad. Hashtag soup. Hashtag to be da soup. So then it turns to Ashley and Ashley to Chelsea. She's like, have you gotten an invite to Saint's birthday party? Jack, well, yeah, today in the car. So what's up, Catherine? You're quiet. She's like, I'm tired. Well, we haven't talked first condolences on the dead grandmother and everything. And happier news, you have a baby who's turning to you. Isn't that crazy? Can you believe that?

You guys are doing something. A party. Is it a personal thing with only you guys going? Can I come to? No, I'm just kidding. Yeah, so Catherine's like, yeah, arm. Is for family and friends and co-workers like twins. She's like, oh, OK.

He's not meant in the parking lot. One time this guy at a bus stop gave me gum and I invited him to. So Ash is like, she's trying to like plan this like, polite, not polite, but she's like, she's making her, she's starting to set herself up. And then Thomas is next to her and like, someone has thrown him this like oversized hand thing

that Craig was holding and like oh while this is funny She's like stop it stop. I'm trying to have a conversation. I can't like have a conversation If you're playing around the hand and like doing that like stop it am I just fucking party or what okay? I'm trying to have a conversation and he's and Chelsea goes he's messing with you Yes, he thank you and she's not true. Thank you. And she's like, okay, Catherine, am I not fine? You can't just say it to my face. And she's like, why are you so angry? She's saying to my face, am I not fine?

She's like, I don't think this is a conversation for the table, really. Well, where is it a conversation? Okay, where is it? She's like, well, when I'm ready, got it. I don't have it. No, I don't have it. I don't have a lot of things. I don't have a ring. Okay. I don't have a flannel. Okay. I don't have writing boots. Okay. I don't have a lot of things. So don't tell me to get it because I don't have it. Okay. Would you better get it if you want to be around? You

want to and then I love when Catherine gets mad because the Southern comes out because she doesn't really have much of an accent. So she gives mad. And she's like, you want to be invited somewhere and you're acting like that. And then Craig goes, well, we are in a restaurant. So okay, Craig, try and stab something with a butter knife. There's one on the table. Make yourself, make yourself useful. Also, Bravo to Catherine for some really good logic. Like, how are you ever going to get invited to something by by coming at someone like that? that stupid face Ashley? So Ashley said, well I already got one. So I, so why'd you ask are you trying to start something with me?

Well, I can see ten years from now, so um, you'll be gone in a month, so I see those kids more than you and then the music brings out like the Lion King drums It's like yeah I'm like whoa And then the music brings out like the Lion King drums. It's like Like whoa Well, they're going for the gold and now we see what she's been she's saving up her budget for the big African drum things And Ashley also says right before she says I see those children more than you see them She goes I'm not going anywhere. So get used to me. I see those children more than you see them And so it's like this everyone's like Cringing and that's it like even Danny's like, okay, you need to slow. Hi, I'm Danny. I've actually been here this entire time

You need to slow your roll, okay? Girls jump down there. They're like shut up. Yeah, yeah, that'd be quiet You can't talk like that. Don't talk about kids. Just because that was low dude Almost as low as not letting me take the horse to a trot today. So Catherine, she's great. This is great. She just goes, you want to be put in your place. I'll put you in your fucking place. And it's like, boom.

You're gonna continue, bitch. Buh-buh-doo. Buh-buh-doo. Cameron's like, I'm gonna have a chase, doodle now. Yeah, Cameron, meanwhile, Cameron's just at home staring at her stomach. Okay, that brings us to the end of another week and another southern charm. Next week's schedule is gonna be a little wonky because we have a very special episode on Monday. We did a crossover with Mr. Ross Matthews and the gang over at Straight Talk.

So that will be Monday's episode. Real Housewives of Potomac will be Tuesday. Wednesday will be Southern Charm Nolan, Sub-A-Leave, man. That is incorrect. So Monday is our talk with Ross Matthews. Tuesday is going to be Potomac. Wednesday is going to be below Dick MED. Thursday is going to be Real Housewives of New York. Friday will be Southern be Southern charm and then starting the week after that Southern Charm New Orleans will start taking up the Tuesday slot and I did actually just watch Southern Southern Charm New Orleans right before this and I am happy to report as you promised me Ronnie that nothing really happened. My favorite my favorite part was watching to make a race her children in that one because she's like, okay, so the kids crying at a birthday party. So she's pissed.

She's like, oh, God, we are at another birthday party. And the kid cried again. Like, that is ridiculous. And Perry's like, you're fighting with the child. Could you please stop yelling at the child? It's like, fine, I'll go into the other room. And he's like, honey, we don't like crying. And then she comes back in.

I told you, I told you I don't like crying. She's a bigger baby than the kid. Yeah. And neither parent ever asked the kid why she was crying. Yeah, exactly. The kid's tantrum was sort of like cracking me up because it was, it was really cute. It was like, and you know, I never say that a child crying is cute. But the kid is like, comes in from the car and is like, mmm, and they're like, what's wrong? And she's like, I'm on my son. Like she's so unlucky. And apparently the kid didn't win a raffle. And so she was crying about it.

She's like, it's no fear. No fear. Well, raffles aren't fucking fair. You know, I've had that cry girl. Oh yeah, oh, many raffles have I cried over. But you know what though? You pick yourself up by the feet and you go upstairs and you say get that camera out of my face. I want to mourn my raffles. And then Justin, kind of like Kelsey think he was kind of proposed to her. It's like the typical Bravo storyline.

Yeah, she thinks I'm going to propose, but I'm really just buying her an necklace. And now we're going to watch her try not to cry And a very romantic scene so he's dead to me and then you had John moody. He's like my painting He's like I can't even do his voice. I have to work on it. It's really dumb. It talks. He's like yeah Yeah, and I love his sister his sister first of all is Gorgeous and second of all she's like every time he says something bullshit like that I'm just trying to save the world like this isn't just like I'm giving the virtually wrong voices like that but like every time I do a painting it's not just a painting I'm changing the world I'm trying to change every painting is going to change where it has meaning but and she's just like okay just boy bye please please yeah he's like I'm gonna change the world

and then he does push ups like yeah you know we all do it in our own way, I guess Listen, if that's the way he wants to change the world, I am here for it and then he had a Jeff and Jeff and Reagan Oh, so they they go well, you know the day after the plantation they go into town because of course the guys go golfing Because that's what has happened on Bravo the guys are golfing and of course John Moody can't hit the ball well at all. Which is hilarious, but the girls go shopping and they go into this shop and there's some sort of water or some beverage or something and ladies like, well, this is made from chantilly

and butterfly and bidders and we're going like, oh, you know, it's funny. Is that my ancestors made patients bidders? Is that funny? Is that funny? It's like, oh, you know, it's funny. Is that my ancestors made patients bidders? Is that funny? Is that funny? It's like, yeah. And also your answer is probably had slaves too. So. Reagan cracks me up though.

She's such an idiot. Reagan and Tameek are both. I'm even starting to like Tameek just because she's so consistently awful. You know, what's funny is I was just, I'm starting to like Reagan and I was, I was just thinking that I'm starting to not like to me as much Well, you're not supposed to I don't think I mean she's just a moron She's she's a moron and she's a horrible human being and she's not a nice mother like everything's horrible and look I I applaud consistency

You know, I'm like hey, she's playing the game very well. She's consistently awful So she's winning me over but they were in the ghost town and in that store and the lady's like You're staying at Murdles. Well, we have ghosts here too One day we came in and two cards were on the ground to greeting cards and one said I love you and the other one said Will you marry me and bring in ghosts? Romantic girls I I also liked how um there was like a room that they stayed in and murdls that the ghosts don't sleep with your socks on and John's up in that room and he's like, my sock fell off.

Someone took my sock off in the middle of the night and I'm like, that means your sock fell off. It's a really, when you go to sleep with your sock on, the friction of the sock and the bedding, you can call it your sock to fall off. Yeah, we're gonna do full recaps in two weeks of this show, so... What are you see about? It's the weekend, guys. Everybody, have a great weekend.

We will talk to you next week. Bye, everyone. Bye. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. You can listen ad-free with Wondry Plus and Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.