We Can Do Hard Things with Glennon Doyle - How We’ll Save Abortion: A Must-Listen with Jessica Valenti

Episode Date: October 10, 2024

353. How We’ll Save Abortion: A Must-Listen with Jessica Valenti Amanda, Glennon and Abby sit down with award-winning writer and activist Jessica Valenti to discuss the state of abortion rights in t...he United States.  Discover:  -The staggering statistic revealing overwhelming public support for abortion in America -Why the anti-choice movement is desperate to keep abortion off the ballot -Why abortion is a litmus test for the future of democracy in America -The exodus of doctors from anti-choice states and the rise in maternal mortality rates.  More on Jessica:  Jessica Valenti is an award-winning author and activist. She’s the author of seven books, including the New York Times bestseller Sex Object: A Memoir. Her groundbreaking anthology, Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power and a World Without Rape, paved the way for legislation of the same name, setting what’s now considered the gold standard for sexual consent. Jessica has also been credited with sparking feminism’s online wave by founding the trailblazing blog Feministing. She’s been a columnist for The Guardian and The Nation, and her writing has been published everywhere from The New York Times and The Atlantic to Bitch magazine and The Toast. After the demise of Roe, Jessica founded Abortion, Every Day, an urgent synthesis of anything and everything happening with abortion rights in the United States. She lives in Brooklyn with her husband and daughter. More about Jessica’s Work:  -https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/772254/abortion-by-jessica-valenti/ -https://jessica.substack.com/ To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:27 Any one of us at any time can be affected by mental health and addictions. Just taking that first step makes a big difference. It's the hardest step. But CAMH was there from the beginning. Everyone deserves better mental health care. To hear more stories of recovery, visit camh.ca. Welcome to We Can Do Hard Things. Please come closer and closer and closer and listen to today because we have
Starting point is 00:01:05 a very important episode for you to feel inside your bones and your body and to talk to your people about. Today, we are talking to Jessica Valenti. And when many years go by and we are talking to our children and our grandchildren about that time that we were almost denied equal citizenship in our own country. I believe that Jessica Valenti will be one of the people that we look back upon as heroic, heroic in that time to keep us in full citizenship
Starting point is 00:01:44 in this precarious moment. And we are so lucky that she lives in this time and we are so lucky that she is here today. Award-winning writer and activist Jessica Valenti is the author of seven books, including the New York Times bestseller Sex Object, a memoir. Her groundbreaking anthology, Yes Means Yes, Visions of Female Sexual Power and a World Without Rape, paved the way for legislation of the same name, setting what's now considered the gold standard for sexual consent. After the demise of Roe, Jessica founded Abortion Every Day, an urgent synthesis of anything and everything happening with
Starting point is 00:02:20 abortion rights in the United States. We will talk about that more because it's a goddamn treasure. Her latest book, Abortion, Our Bodies, Their Lies, and the Truths We Used to Win is available now and is a must read for everyone. Thank you, Jessica Valenti. Thank you. Thank you. Thanks for having me.
Starting point is 00:02:41 I can't like start to cry immediately. That was such a nice intro. Well, that makes one of us who't like start to cry immediately. That was such a nice intro. Well, that makes one of us who hasn't started to cry immediately. I've never lost my shit during an introduction before, but here we are. Yeah. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:02:57 I'm not going to try to explain it. I wonder. I bet when women get introduced to you, they start to cry. I'm just going to tell myself that. No, it happens. Yeah. OK, it happens. Yeah. OK, thanks, Jessica. It's a really personal, hard, difficult, challenging topic.
Starting point is 00:03:12 Yeah. It's not just the topic. It is the topic. But it's like watching you every day out there, just like fighting this fucking fight while so many of us are feeling what you're feeling and not able to stay as steady and ferocious and informed. And it really is an stunning thing to watch. This is what for people who don't know what Glennon's talking about. So Jessica, when
Starting point is 00:03:41 she's always been a feminist scholar, writer, contributor to all of progress. And when Ro fell, she started every single day, almost hourly, updating on local, state, national, media reporting, legislation, talking points, everything to diagnose exactly the strategy, the desensitization that they're trying to do every single step. So when you look and say, why is the anti-choice movement so organized and relentless? Jessica to me looks like the equal and opposite of that. She is relentless, she is steadfast, she is chronicling, which is the kind of intensity and attention we need to have now.
Starting point is 00:04:34 So, Jessica. Yes. We have been told relentlessly that abortion is one of the most controversial issues in America. Is this true, Jessica? Not even in the slightest. Not even in the slightest. It is incredibly, incredibly popular.
Starting point is 00:04:55 Abortion has been incredibly popular for decades. But since Roe has overturned, that support has become overwhelming and completely unprecedented. The stat I really enjoy that I like to talk about a lot is 81%. 81% of Americans don't want government involvement in pregnancy or abortion at all. 81% of Americans don't want abortion regulated by the law. percent of Americans don't want abortion regulated by the law. That is a stunning, incredible number. And yet we're still sort of sold this lie that this is something that the country is polarized over. And nothing could be further from the truth. So tell us why then, before we get into the weeds of this, why is abortion sort of a litmus
Starting point is 00:05:44 test for whether or not we actually have a democracy? Good question. That is a great, great question. It's so fundamental. Your right to bodily integrity, your right to be able to choose your own life path in future, that's everything, right? That is completely everything. And then on a more sort of political granular level, if you're talking about an issue that 81% of Americans
Starting point is 00:06:17 don't want regulated by the law, and it's regulated by the law, we're talking about this very, very small group of extremist legislators imposing their will on the vast majority of voters, right? And they know it. They know that people want abortion to be legal. And that's why we're seeing in every state where abortion is on the ballot this November, they are doing every single thing that they can to stop voters from having a say. They do not want voters to be able to check off that box because they know what's going
Starting point is 00:06:49 to happen. And so it's been incredible watching this sort of consistent undermining of democracy in these states and across the country when it comes to abortion. And if that's at risk, everything else is too, right? Can we break down so much minutia here that like, you know, the devil is in all of the details. Sure. Can you just break down some of the strategies that are happening now, especially like McConnell
Starting point is 00:07:18 getting rid of the phrase pro-life, the ways that they are redefining abortion and trying to obfuscate what it is and what it isn't. And maybe you can just start with what is abortion and how are they trying to change that reality of what it is. Yeah, this is really important. And I'm glad you asked because not enough people talk about this.
Starting point is 00:07:36 Abortion is a medical intervention to end a pregnancy for whatever reason, because you don't wanna be pregnant, because the pregnancy is putting your life in danger, for whatever reason, that's an abortion. They want to redefine abortion as an intention, right? Only the cases where you didn't want to be pregnant. And so if someone's life is at risk, if someone is the victim of a sexual assault, if they have an ectopic pregnancy, they want to say that's not an abortion. If someone needs miscarriage treatment, we know that's abortion.
Starting point is 00:08:08 They're saying, nope, that's not an abortion. It's only the intent, which they're doing for a specific reason, right? They know that abortion is already popular, but abortion is especially, especially popular when you're talking about someone's life being at risk or someone being a victim. And so they're working really hard. And we'll just put a pin real quick in, that's not to say that those people are safe to access abortions.
Starting point is 00:08:31 If you have a miscarriage or if you're raped, like we'll come back to that. They're saying that's not an abortion, but they're still not allowing you to have it. Okay, but what is abortion? Exactly, they're still not allowing you to have it. But they are working over time to try to just glean any sort of popularity that they can out of this issue because they know that they're losing so, so badly. Right? And you
Starting point is 00:08:53 mentioned how they're getting rid of the term pro-life or they're not using it as much anymore. That is one of their main strategies is attacks on language. Right? Pro-life was one of the most popular sort of political terms for decades. Everyone sort of assumed that Republicans won the language war when it came to abortion. But because people can see the reality of the consequences of abortion bans, it's become a poisonous term for them. And so they're completely shifting around their language. To sound more pro-choice, actually, my sort of favorite thing that they're completely shifting around their language to sound more pro-choice actually. My sort of like favorite thing that they're doing is when they're talking about like 12 or 15 week bans,
Starting point is 00:09:31 for example, that restrict abortion, they'll say, this is a plan to keep abortion legal for 12 to 15 weeks, right? Anything to sort of switch it and make it sound more pro-choice, because they know that Americans are overwhelmingly pro-choice. It's very, very sneaky. Jessica, what are they talking about? I want to really dig down into when we listen to Donald on the presidential debate,
Starting point is 00:09:58 and he says, they want to have abortions up until birth. They want to have abortion post-birth.. They want to have abortion post birth. All of this sounds insane and it is, but he's talking about something specific actually. And I want you to explain to us what is he pointing at that is a real need for women? What does he mean? Yeah, it's really distressing. It's already such a horrific talking point, but when you actually know what he's referring to, it makes it like a million times worse. He's talking about palliative care for newborns,
Starting point is 00:10:33 for fatally ill newborns. So sometimes, unfortunately, a baby is born way too early to survive or they have a condition that's incompatible with life. Instead of giving that baby painful medical interventions, putting them on breathing machines, parents, because they know that this baby is going to die, will say, you know what? We want to have a few last moments with our child peacefully, without medical interventions, without wires and tubes, NICU nurses will set up a private room for them. They'll get to hold their baby while it passes.
Starting point is 00:11:08 It is an extraordinarily important option for parents. And that's what he's calling post-birth abort. That is exactly what he's referring to. When he says that these people are executioners, that's who he's calling executioners, are parents who have to make this absolutely tragic, horrific decision, a decision that they're making in the best interest of their child and family. It's so upsetting to see him use this language.
Starting point is 00:11:42 It's also really distressing to see one that people believe it and that two, not enough people are pushing back and pointing out what he's really talking about. Because if people knew what he was really talking about, I think that the backlash, the outrage would just be unbelievable. Can you tell us before, when you were talking about the intention, dig more into that with respect to like what that means to folks who have miscarriages or who are exercising or
Starting point is 00:12:15 what have you if they didn't really want the baby or if they did or how they prove that. What does that mean? So it really could impact criminalization, which we're already seeing, right? So let's say, and we've seen this happen, let's say you have a stillbirth, and for whatever reason, the police get involved and they look at your Google history,
Starting point is 00:12:36 and when you first found out you were pregnant, you weren't maybe sure that you wanted to keep the pregnancy, and so you Googled abortion clinics. That can be used as proof of intention that maybe you didn't want that pregnancy and maybe you caused that stillbirth, right? It's just so horrific. And again, we're already seeing that kind of criminalization happen. I'm sure lots of people have heard about Brittany Watts, the woman in Ohio who was arrested for abuse of a corpse because she flushed her miscarriage in her own home. There was a woman in South Carolina who was arrested for abuse of a corpse because she flushed her miscarriage in her own home.
Starting point is 00:13:05 There was a woman in South Carolina who was arrested after losing her pregnancy. I mean, this is already happening. I think too often we talk about this as some future danger. This is already happening. There was a report out from a really terrific organization called Pregnancy Justice just last week, I think it was, and they found that since Roe was overturned, there have been 210 pregnancy-related arrests and charges brought in this country. So, this is already here. They are very much looking for ways to prosecute people for their pregnancy outcomes, right? Whether it's abortion, miscarriage, stillbirth, it's all on the table, it's all in danger.
Starting point is 00:13:48 And wait till it's not an election year, how many arrests there are. In the case of Brittany, so this is a woman, she goes to the hospital, she's bleeding, she wants them to help her. She's not quote unquote in danger enough for them to help her, which is why she then has her miscarriage at home
Starting point is 00:14:07 when she goes home. And then when she goes back, because after her miscarriage in her toilet, she's so scared of her bleeding, she goes back. She's in there in the hospital with the nurse who calls 911 and the cops go to her house to go to check the toilet. So talk to us about what's happening
Starting point is 00:14:27 when she first goes to the hospital and she says, I need help. Talk to us about the exception for, we always hear, for the life or the health of the mother. Talk about why that's utter bullshit and is killing people. So she went to her OBGYN first, who said, this is not a viable pregnancy.
Starting point is 00:14:46 You're going to lose this pregnancy. The longer you are pregnant, the more your health and life is in danger. And so like most people would do, she went to the hospital for help. But because they were unsure about what the law meant for them, I think it was something like 12 hours.
Starting point is 00:15:01 They were convening ethics boards. They were not giving her care. And so she was, I'm going home. I'm not going to sit here and not get help. And so that's why she ended up miscarrying at home. But yeah, it's just complete and utter nonsense, this idea that there is an exception for women's lives because these laws essentially require people, doctors, to wait until you are on the brink of death, and maybe then they can save your life.
Starting point is 00:15:29 And what is so upsetting to me about this is not just women are dying, we know that women are dying, but that our suffering is seen as acceptable, right? Think about all of that suffering in the lead up to that point. People are losing reproductive organs. Just the fact that pain and suffering for women, for pregnant people, is considered a completely acceptable outcome for these laws. And that is one of the things
Starting point is 00:16:00 that scares me the most is that normalization of that suffering. Right? One of the things that scares me the most is that normalization of that suffering. Right? Like one of the things that they are doing in these laws with the so-called life exceptions and with redefining abortion is that they're forcing doctors to give women with life-threatening pregnancies C-sections instead of a standard abortion procedure, even when it is too early for a fetus to survive. You're talking about 14, 15 weeks, because they don't want anyone to ever be able to say, abortion is necessary to save someone's life. They want to say, abortion is never necessary. You can just give her a C-section,
Starting point is 00:16:37 nevermind that it's a major abdominal surgery, that it's more dangerous, that it's more traumatic, that it's unnecessary. They will do anything in service of this political talking point. And if we have to suffer incredibly mentally, physically, they're willing to let that happen. Jessica, are they also giving the C-section because they're so afraid to perform a simple abortion because they...
Starting point is 00:17:02 Yes. So then they can say it was a C-section because the doctors are terrified of prosecution. They're absolutely terrified. It is both that they are so afraid and they feel like, okay, this is one way we can make sure that if a prosecutor ever came to us, we can sort of prove that we did everything that we could.
Starting point is 00:17:21 But it's also spelled out in the law, right? They in Idaho, for example, they use language around maternal fetal separation. Yes. Right? And to end a life threatening pregnancy, it's not an abortion that you need. It's a maternal fetal separation. And the Idaho Supreme Court actually said explicitly C-section or vaginal labor. And so in some cases, that is being spelled out explicitly for doctors and doctors
Starting point is 00:17:46 feel like that is what they need to do in order to follow the law. We have the crisis among patients and we do have a crisis among doctors. There's a mental health crisis for doctors who OB-GYNs and maternal fetal medicine specialists, especially because of this moral damage that's being done to them. They know how to save someone's life. They know what the best that's being done to them. They know how to save someone's life. They know what the best course of action is to do, but the law is preventing them from doing it. And if a lot of OBGYNs, a lot of people in this field are women of reproductive age,
Starting point is 00:18:19 they have their own children, right? And I've heard from so many doctors who are like, I would love to just say, F it and break the law. But what happens to my other patients if I go to prison? What happens to my child if I go to prison? And the anti-abortion movement knows that. All of these laws were set up very, very explicitly. This was by design. You know, we've heard so much from politicians, Republican politicians, saying they're not reading the law correctly. The law is, they're misunderstanding.
Starting point is 00:18:49 They're misunderstanding the law. Absolutely not. They had 50 years to plan for this and to create these laws. They knew exactly what they were doing and all of this pain and suffering that we're seeing is 100% by design. Mmm. how your stomach feels as the RPMs build, how your wheels hug the curves, and how with the Pennzoil Platinum Up to 15-Year, 800,000 kilometer protection guarantee, your adventures will be many. Pennzoil, Long May We Drive,
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Starting point is 00:20:12 ["FanDuel Theme"] You mentioned Idaho with the doctors there. Can you talk through that example as to how, I'd never thought of this before until I read your book about how this uncertainty, which is scaring the shit out of doctors, is actually leading to disastrous healthcare for women who will never even entertain an abortion.
Starting point is 00:20:40 Talk about the cyclical effect on the whole system and why that's actually leading to more abortions, ironically. Yeah. It's really, really bad. You know, doctors understandably do not want to practice in anti-abortion states because they don't want to fear going to prison for providing the standard of care. They don't want to not be able to provide the standard of care.
Starting point is 00:21:00 And so you're seeing this tremendous exodus of OB-GYNs, of reproductive health care specialists from anti-abortion states. And Idaho is a good example because they lost 25% of their OB-GYNs and 50%, I think at last count, of their maternal fetal medicine specialists. As a result of that, maternity wards and hospitals are shutting down. As a result of that. People who want to go give birth all of a sudden have to drive an hour, two hours to be able to get to the hospital. So if you have an emergency with your pregnancy, has nothing to do with abortion, right?
Starting point is 00:21:34 Supposedly this has nothing to do. You just want to go give birth. All of a sudden you're in incredible, incredible danger and the maternal mortality rate increases. And in Texas, we've already seen, there was a new report that showed maternal mortality went up by 56%. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:21:50 Since they implemented their abortion ban. And those will never be calculated as related to abortion. No. They will never be considered. Those will just be, oh, those women happen to die in pregnancy, not those women died in pregnancy because there were no
Starting point is 00:22:05 healthcare places because all the doctors left because of your ban. Exactly. And they don't want, I mean, I think what's also so difficult and horrific about this is that because these deaths will overwhelmingly be women of color, black women, poor women, their hope is that people won't notice or won't care, right? They are counting on American racism and bigotry. They're counting on it. They're using it in this really cynical, awful way. But yeah, it's a whole system, right? Abortion touches everything. Abortion rights touches every single part of our life. It touches our healthcare. It touches our democracy. And they know it. And they are always, always counting on America's racism and bigotry.
Starting point is 00:22:46 Always. That is their main source of fueling power for every single regulation and fucking always works. Yeah, it's the same thing with criminalization, right? When you look at the people who are being criminalized and arrested for their pregnancy outcomes, the people who are most in danger are women of color and black women specifically, right?
Starting point is 00:23:06 Like when that nurse called 911 on Brittany Watts, it was because of her racism. It was because she saw Brittany Watts in a particular way and her pregnancy outcome became criminal. Which goes back to intent. If you're trying to define abortion based on intent of you didn't want your baby and America is programmed to see people of color and receive them with mal-intent. Suspicion. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:23:33 Mm-hmm. And also imagine with Britney wants, they wrote in her medical records because she said something like, this baby is dying. I am getting sicker. Like, can you help me? They wrote that in her records as were really concerned because she mentioned the word abortion. She wants an abortion. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:23:51 That's really, really scary. What else would you ask for in that situation? Would you not ask for help? All of a sudden is asking for help at the hospital considered evidence of a criminal act? It's really scary. Can I just, I want to, we're going to get back to the weeds and I promise my sister, I wouldn't get too much into the roots of things,
Starting point is 00:24:11 but I do just have one question. Okay. I'm a white lady who has been in the evangelical church. So I have personal experience with white male leaders trying to keep abortion from poor people in this country while privately supporting the abortions of their rich white wives. That is something I have personally experienced again and again. Okay?
Starting point is 00:24:37 It's not theory. I've seen it. What is the fucking point? I understand it's hatred of women. It's all of this. Like even analyzing what women want or don't want and the vision of what palliative care is, a woman crying with her baby compared to the image they're trying to put in our minds,
Starting point is 00:24:55 which is a witchy woman trying to kill people, whatever. It's not just hatred of women or misogyny though. Is it class warfare? Is the real plan we keep people who are marginalized down and keep them poor and keep them strapped for resources with all these babies while we control our reproductive selves? I mean, the short answer is yes, absolutely.
Starting point is 00:25:22 The anti-abortion movement is very much about reinforcing traditional gender roles, traditional gender binary. That's why you see so many anti-trans attacks attached to attacks on abortion and reaffirming sort of this white evangelical white supremacy patriarchy. And I hate to get into all the theory words, but that really is what this is about. It is about trapping women in the private sphere. What better way to ensure that women and people who can get pregnant
Starting point is 00:25:53 cannot participate in the public sphere if they are forever pregnant, right? Or if their health is constantly at risk, what better way to keep them financially vulnerable? Yes. It's very, very, very clear. Thank you. What they're doing.
Starting point is 00:26:11 And so it's, yes, it's about a hatred of women, but it is about this desperation to get to a place where they once again have control over everything. And banning abortion is key to that. It unlocks everything else for them. Yes. It unlocks everything else because if you have no unqualified right to your life, if your life is by law subservient to another right, which is let's be be clear, exactly what's happening, then you are uniquely situated in that.
Starting point is 00:26:49 Men have no world in which their unqualified right to life is compromised in any way. But if you have a whole set of people who know that, psychologically, legally, whatever, then there's two different strata of citizenship in the world. And that freaked me the hell out. Like, tell me if this is true.
Starting point is 00:27:12 But in the SCOTUS, the Supreme Court case, where there was a federal law where it said that these states had to follow a federal law that said, that had the wild idea that emergency rooms have to save women's lives, even if it means giving them an abortion. Okay, this is the radical wild idea. If a woman comes in and to save her life,
Starting point is 00:27:39 you have to give her an abortion, you have to. And Texas and Idaho sued to say, we don't have to follow that law because they said that a woman doesn't have an unqualified right to abortion, which is another way of saying a woman doesn't have an unqualified right to her life. Yeah. And I mean, it is really unbelievable. And in one of those, there was the Supreme Court case and there was a Fifth Circuit decision. And in that Fifth Circuit decision, you can sort of sense the disdain for women who would dare to want to live in those moments, right? And that, you sort of see it again and again in the anti-abortion movement, this valorization of women who are willing to die for their
Starting point is 00:28:20 pregnancies and the demonization of those who say, I don't wanna die for my pregnancy. I wanna get radiation treatment for my cancer. I want to live for the existing children that I have and to paint those women as bad mothers, bad people, not fulfilling their duty to die for their pregnancies. There is this real sense that that is your job. It is your job to be a good woman
Starting point is 00:28:50 and die for your pregnancy. And how dare you expect to live? How dare you expect to have control over your own life? When you really dig into it, when you're following this every day, it becomes just clearer and clearer. I have to say, it's so many fundamental rights that are on the line. The thing I write about in the book that I'm really worried about next is the right to travel, birth control,
Starting point is 00:29:18 and the right to travel. Those are the two things that are incredibly, incredibly on the line for us. I'm so worried because, you know, for years, feminists were warning that the end of row would happen and they didn't listen to us. So I'm trying to say again and again, now it's birth control and the right to travel next. And I'm really hoping people will listen this time around. Can you talk to us about the trafficking?
Starting point is 00:29:41 They're calling it anti-trafficking, right? What do they mean? They're calling it anti-trafficking, right, what do they mean? They're calling it anti-trafficking, and the way that they're doing this is what they do a lot of the time, which is they're starting with minors, they're starting with teenagers, and what it actually is is a travel ban, right? It's a travel ban for teenagers,
Starting point is 00:29:59 but they're calling it anti-trafficking because who likes trafficking? Who isn't anti-trafficking? You know, that sounds great. And what they say the law is, is, you know, we're just making it illegal for someone who is not a parent to take a minor out of the state for an abortion, which sounds okay.
Starting point is 00:30:17 I mean, it does mean that, you know, a grandmother, an aunt who wants to help a teen, a teen who's maybe being abused at home could be guilty of abortion trafficking. But what they don't talk about is that they've written the law in such a way that anyone who helps a teenager get an abortion in any way, you text them the URL to a clinic, you lend them gas money so they can drive themselves out of state. That is considered abortion trafficking.
Starting point is 00:30:43 And in Texas, I think it last count it was five counties, they are passing these local ordinances that have the same thing for women of all ages. So that if you use their roads, their highways to drive a woman out of state for an abortion, that's considered trafficking. What I thought was the most interesting quote from one of the anti-abortion activists who is behind this effort, someone said to him, well, if you're talking about adult women who want to
Starting point is 00:31:14 leave the state of their own volition, how is this trafficking? And he said, the fetus is always being trafficked. The fetus has no choice. And that is the end game. That is the end game is if you are pregnant and you leave the state, you are trafficking your own pregnancy, right? And we've already in Alabama, the attorney general there wrote a whole legal brief where he said the state absolutely has a right
Starting point is 00:31:42 to restrict pregnant people's travel in the same way that we restrict sex offenders' travel rights. Literally compared the two things, because he said, in the same way that the state has an interest in protecting victims from sexual offenders, the state has an interest in protecting fetuses from women who might want to leave the state to have an abortion.
Starting point is 00:32:02 And so this is very much here. They are already trying this out and they think because they try it out on the most marginalized folks, like young people, that we won't get outraged immediately and that we won't notice. Yes. They also think one of the things that's so important about your book is if you have an issue that 81% of people are pro, you can't use actual language that would tip people off to what you're trying to do. So what is Pod Squad? If you could
Starting point is 00:32:33 hear anything we're saying, I'm gonna ask Jessica now to explain to you what you are going to hear from Republican lawmakers and Donald Trump and the other side, but what they actually mean is something different. So when they say to you, we don't want trafficking, you're gonna think, yay, no trafficking. What they mean is they don't want women who have fetuses in them, or that's just a slippery slope too.
Starting point is 00:32:59 Wait till women are just half a fetus because they've got eggs in them. Can you please talk to us about contraception? And I want you to talk to us about what they will say. They will say they're pro contraception. But you say, do not ask a Republican lawmaker whether they are pro contraception or anti contraception.
Starting point is 00:33:23 No. You ask them, what kind of contraception do you support? Tell us why that is the question. Yeah, for years, the conservative movement, the anti-abortion movement has been laying the legal groundwork to argue that certain kinds of contraception are actually abortions, specifically emergency contraception and IUDs.
Starting point is 00:33:46 But depending on what group you talk to, some of them will argue the same thing about any hormonal birth control for women at all, that those are actually abortions. And their sort of unscientific take on this is that an IUD prevents the implantation of a fertilized egg, or that's what emergency contraception does, and therefore it's an abortion. And so they'll say, of course I'm pro contraception, of course I'm pro birth control. Well, what are you talking about? Are you talking about IUDs?
Starting point is 00:34:16 I'm pro condoms. Right. That is exactly what they mean. They mean they're pro condoms. And none of them are pro condoms. None of them fucking wear condoms. OK, that's another thing that is true. But go ahead. That, that's another thing that is true, but go ahead. That's a whole other thing. I mean, really, truly, so that when they make moves to ban
Starting point is 00:34:32 birth control, they can say, but we're not banning birth control. We're banning abortions because IUDs are abortions and because emergency contraception is abortions. That is already happening in some states where states are trying to expand services for contraception is abortions. That is already happening in some states where states are trying to expand services for contraception and Republicans will refuse to vote for it because they say, no, we don't want to expand services to IUDs because that's abortion. It really is already here and already happening. But as you said, it's all in the language. And that's one of the things I tried to do with the book is sort of provide, here are the words that you need to watch out for. Please watch out for these terms in your local legislation. If your state senators start saying these terms, please know what this is
Starting point is 00:35:15 actually about and what they're actually saying, because it's very, very different than what most Americans understand those words to mean. So the birth control thing is so interesting because it seems like right on the cusp of the abortion pill issue, which is that 63% of all abortions are done basically in the comfort of your own home with the abortion pills, which is driving the right absolutely fucking bonkers because they can't protest it because you're just in there doing it yourself and it's making them crazy. There's a terrifying reality that we could have a nationwide abortion ban without a nationwide abortion ban. So tell us what could happen day one of a Trump administration
Starting point is 00:36:15 sure to us. Yeah. And it's not just what could happen. It's what they have laid out. Right. Yes. Like what will absolutely like what they have made very, very clear is they'll replace the head of the FDA so that they can revoke approval of abortion medication, which as you said, majority of abortions. So right there, you're good. They will enforce the Comstock Act, which is this ridiculous 150-year-old law that says you can't mail obscene materials. Obscene materials in this case means abortion medication, tools to provide abortions, birth control. You don't need that national ban if you can pass this informal ban across the country,
Starting point is 00:36:58 again, in all states, not just anti-choice states, but in pro-choice states, so that something will remain legal in name only, but if no one can access it, then what does it matter? It's the same thing with birth control, and they're doing that in the states. Sure, they can say birth control is legal, but if you've ensured that no one can get insurance coverage for it, if you've ensured that you've kicked out all of the OBGYNs and reproductive health clinics in a town, then how is that really accessible? And it does get back to this idea of they know that this issue is extraordinarily
Starting point is 00:37:31 popular. They don't want to have to say explicitly what they're doing. And so they're going to try all of these sort of backdoor ways to get it through. Jessica, what else should we listen for? Because no Republican lawmaker, none of them now, especially seeing how the tide is turning, or has already always been turned, is going to say, yes, I support a ban. Yeah, that's the big one. What are they going to say instead? Yeah, they're going to say reasonable restriction. Consensus legislation is a big one because they want to make it sound like people support it, right? It's really those two, but the word ban has become so interesting.
Starting point is 00:38:10 They will not say that they support an abortion ban because they know how unpopular it is. And what is so tricky about this is on their side, they have redefined abortion ban to mean a total ban on abortion, even in cases where someone's life is in danger. So when you hear Donald Trump say or JD Vance say, of course we're not going to sign a national abortion ban. It's the rhetorical equivalent of them crossing their fingers behind their back because what they really mean is we're not going to pass a law that bans abortion even in cases when someone's life is at risk.
Starting point is 00:38:42 But when they say, but I do support reasonable restrictions at the federal level, that's just another way of saying abortion ban, right? Or they'll say, I only support restrictions on late term abortion. Well, what do they mean by late term? They mean anything after the first trimester. So they'll never say that.
Starting point is 00:39:00 Why do they keep saying, oh, well, we did what the people want. We gave it back to the states. The will of the people. What does that mean? I mean, really, it means nothing because they know that the will of the people is not with them. You know, this is something that Donald Trump has been pushing really, really hard saying,
Starting point is 00:39:18 I gave it back to the states. The states can decide and do whatever they want. And now it's up to the will of the people. But guess what? If you live in one of these states that's gerrymandered, that there's voter suppression, or as we're seeing in every state where abortion is on the ballot,
Starting point is 00:39:32 where they're trying to keep abortion off the ballot, then it's not the will of the people. It's not the will of the people at all, and they know that. And so this is a way for them to pretend to care about what voters want, while again passing these laws that the vast majority of voters oppose. They know that if Americans knew the truth about the future that they really wanted for
Starting point is 00:39:56 all of us, that people would be out in the street every single day. It's already so bad. We can see how bad it is every day with all these horror stories. It is what they want for us is so much worse. And it's so important to see the connections to those things. I mean, the whole idea that we were talking about about your role as a woman is to,
Starting point is 00:40:17 for your life to be subservient to a greater thing. And you're supposed to embrace that. And if it requires you dying, so be it. Which is why abortion is on this same exact spectrum with Trump and Vance's ending no fault divorce. You are a woman to die to and make your life subservient to this thing which is maintaining your marriage. Never mind the fact that when you get rid of no-fault divorce, the women's suicide rate increases by 20 percent. It's the exact same thing. It's you're supposed to die for it. Yeah. You're supposed to fulfill that role as a quote unquote good woman.
Starting point is 00:40:57 I think that really is such a big reason that conservatives find abortion so terrifying. It's not really about saving life or saving fetal life, right? Because they know that infant mortality is going up in these states with abortion bans. It's not about that. It is about control and it is about knowing that abortion allows people to choose their own life path, to make their own futures and lives for themselves. And this is why in the book, I try really hard to talk about abortion
Starting point is 00:41:28 as a proactive moral good. This is something that allows you to choose your own life, right? I write a little about the life that abortion gave me, the life that I have now, my family that I have now, is thanks to abortion. The abortion I had in my 20s, I met my husband three months later, we had our daughter three years later. Without that
Starting point is 00:41:51 abortion, my family would not exist. And so it's so important that we are talking about abortion, not just as a healthcare issue or as a democracy issue, but as something that allows us to literally choose our own lives. There is nothing more powerful than that. Me too. I love your line in your book where you say when they're always all the anti-choice is always saying like, oh, what if that woman's baby could have cured cancer, could have done whatever. And it's like, no, they never say what if that woman could have, what if her life meant something and she could have done something
Starting point is 00:42:25 that would contribute it to the world? It's, every abortion is a beginning. And the stories that we hear, like the propaganda of like the woman who has an abortion who was torn up about it her entire life. That is not my experience. I am a person who I truly believe I've never gotten over a single thing that's ever happened to me
Starting point is 00:42:47 since I was born and Abby knows that. I am a ruminator. I do not for one day regret my abortion. My abortion, and actually I've had more than one, but I mean, when I think about what my life would have been, had I gone through with a pregnancy, I was still sick. I wouldn't have gotten sober. I wouldn't have had the life that I have right now.
Starting point is 00:43:14 I wouldn't have had my three children. I wouldn't have Abby. I wouldn't have this career. I wouldn't be speaking to you. I know where I was and what would have happened. And God, that would have been so much nicer for patriarchy if that's what would have happened to me. Exactly, exactly.
Starting point is 00:43:30 And I feel like when we talk about abortion and we talk about it in a medical way and in a way that a woman gets to choose her own life, it de-stigmatizes the things that women carry with them, those women who've actually had abortions, like some of the shame or guilt that they, that shame and guilt has been taught to them, has been conditioned to them,
Starting point is 00:43:52 for them to then carry throughout their whole lives. And it's like, it's so, it doesn't need to be this way. The only shame that I ever had, Jessica, was am I supposed to be having shame? Exactly. Like I felt shame because I still think that sometimes. I'm like, when I hear the propaganda or see the propaganda, the only shame I have is am I missing like a gene
Starting point is 00:44:14 that I'm supposed to, but no, it's because that's made up. It is. And there's all of these studies that show, something like 99% of women who have abortions do not regret that decision. But it doesn't mean that the shame isn't there or doesn't impact people. One of the women I spoke to for the newsletter
Starting point is 00:44:32 and for the book was this very young woman in Texas, 21 years old, had a wanted pregnancy, found out 15 weeks in that it had not developed at all above the neck, like can't imagine anything worse, obviously was not going to survive. And she had to leave the state for an abortion. She had to go to New Mexico. And when I was talking to this young woman, even though she knew who I was, that I was very pro-choice, that this is what I do, she was almost apologetic. I'm so sorry. I really did want the baby, but I just didn't
Starting point is 00:45:07 think that I could give birth to a baby and see a baby without a head. Of course you couldn't. Who would expect that of you? But it was so clear that because she lived in this state and in this culture and in this religious community that had told her that she was a horrible person for wanting to do this, that even talking to the most feminist pro-choice person, she felt the need to apologize. And that really broke my heart. And it breaks my heart for all of these young women
Starting point is 00:45:35 who are growing up in these states and in these communities where that is the propaganda that's being fed to them. Jessica, after I had one of my abortions, my... And I want to say, I do feel, and I've talked to many women who have feelings. So I'm not, that's, however it feels is a hundred percent. Okay. But I got sent to a priest.
Starting point is 00:45:55 My parents were like, we don't know what to do with this girl anymore. Just can someone help? Like, we'll try God. Okay. So I got sent to a priest, The priest sat me down and said, it's one day you might be forgiven, but what will happen is you'll die. This is literally what he said to me in the opt.
Starting point is 00:46:14 You will die and then your baby will be waiting for you after you die. And then you'll be able to look your baby in the face and apologize. That is what was told to me when I was 20, whatever. Based on all the stuff that he's read in the Bible. Anyway, just thought I'd share in case anyone else had some crazy shit like that happen to them.
Starting point is 00:46:34 A nightmare. And it's just like, it makes me so upset when people who have no ability to get pregnant have no ability to understand what any of this is like, think that they hold any sort of decision making, any sort of moral authority over that. It is absurd. One thing that I think is so powerful about your work is that you're showing how, you know, we know the power of women individually and collectively. We know how awesome that is.
Starting point is 00:47:06 And one thing that they're trying to do through these bounty hunter laws and rewarding people with money who turn other people in is criminalize community. As you said, we're criminalized support connection community. And that is effective and devastating. And yet you are finding these stories of us taking care of us in the way, you know, like the pilots who organized to volunteer to fly their own planes in and fly women out
Starting point is 00:47:36 to get what they needed. Can you end with a couple of stories that show us how, you know, like black women have always said, we protect us, like we take care of us. How are we doing that? How do we do that for each other? I mean, it is really happening. That's been the one thing that as hard as this work is and writing about this work every day, to see that in action, to see that community in action has been incredible. I tell this story a lot because it means a lot to me. A few months ago, I went to Florida
Starting point is 00:48:06 right after the six-week abortion ban had been passed. And I was going around to abortion clinics and meeting with activists. And this clinic manager was taking the group I was with throughout the building. And because the ban had just passed, it was very, very empty. And so we're in the waiting room. The waiting room is empty. She takes us into the exam room. The exam room is empty. Then she takes us all the way into the back of the building, into this very small cramped room. And in this small cramped room were a dozen or more young women, all wearing headsets, all on the phone, booking hotel rooms, buying bus tickets for patients. One of them was texting emotional support to a patient who had never been on an airplane before.
Starting point is 00:48:46 It was so incredible to think about there are rooms like this across the country every single day of people working their asses off, ensuring that people will be able to get the care that they need no matter what that loss is. There are in every single state and every single town, there is someone there who will help you. And I think they are trying to break apart community. They are trying to divide us in that way. And it's so important that we remember we are here to help each other. We always have been, we always will be. And in that way, no matter what kind of law they
Starting point is 00:49:26 pass, they're not going to stop us from getting the care that we need and from helping each other to do that. Does abortion every day, your site, does it have places where people can plug in? If people are hearing this and saying, I want to be that community for folks. Yes. We can go to your site, abortion every day and find ways to do that community for folks. We can go to your site, Abortion Every Day, and find ways to do that. Yes. We have a resource section where there's all sorts of organizations that you can be in contact with and a way to find your local abortion fund, which is a fantastic way to find out what's
Starting point is 00:49:59 happening in your community, find out what they need, find out what the best way to help is. Because that is the thing I hear most often from people is, okay, what do I do? How do I help? Everyone wants to do something, which makes me really, really hopeful. And I always tell people, start small, figure out what your school needs, what your town needs, what your community needs, figure out who's already doing that work and how you can support them. There are so many people involved in helping one single person get an abortion now, right? From the person who's donating money to the person who's making that phone call to the person who drives them out of state. There are all of these different ways that we can be there for
Starting point is 00:50:42 each other. And that should give us a bit of hope. And stock up on your abortion pills. They last for five years. And please, yes, you can get advanced provision abortion medication. I have three doses in my bathroom cabinet, and my 14-year-old knows it. And I want to make sure that no matter what happens,
Starting point is 00:50:59 I have that ready to go. Jessica, when you're going to sleep at night and you're thinking about your daughter in this country and the upcoming election, what does whatever is gonna happen on election day? What do you think about that? And what do you wanna say to anyone who maybe not yet be finding the motivation to get their ass to the polls?
Starting point is 00:51:24 Yeah, this is, it's everything. What happens in November is everything. It is already really bad now, it's true, but we have the chance to make it a little bit better or the chance to make it a whole, whole lot worse. And if you are horrified, as I imagine a lot of people are, by all of the suffering that you've seen over the last two years, if you've read these stories and they've touched you, then you know what you have to do on election day. It is absolutely vital. Yeah. We are so deeply grateful for you and your work and your commitment.
Starting point is 00:52:04 And I will say that I thought I really did think I understood a lot about this, but I actually sat down and read abortion from the first page until the last page and didn't get off the couch until it was done. And I realized that there was a hell of a lot that I didn't understand. And I'm just so freaking grateful for people
Starting point is 00:52:24 who can write stuff and tell me the words that I need to understand and say. It's very clear. So go get the book, buy the book for your friends. It's a short read. It's not overwhelming and it will help you in your conversations, which is what we needed. Yeah. Thank you. That was really the hope because I hear from so many women, young women
Starting point is 00:52:47 especially, who say they care about this issue so much, but they feel so consistently diminished, talked over, dismissed. I really wanted to write something that could act as a tool and make them feel like they were armed with everything that they needed to go out and have those conversations, do that work, no matter what kind of work it is. You did it. It is that. Thank you. Thank you, Jessica. I'm just like, want you to go and do whatever the hell else you're doing today. Just keep going. Just more writing. Just more writing. Awesome. Thank you, Jessica. Thank you, pod squad. Go get the book. Go get your ass to the polls.
Starting point is 00:53:26 Talk to your friends. And also, like, just let's embrace the idea of the slippery slope of selflessness for women. Do not buy it in the beginning. Do not buy it when they tell you, you can't want money, you can't want success, you can't want love, you can't want... Because it ends with you not even being able to want your own life. So resist it today. Exist. Demand to exist. We love you, Pod Squad.
Starting point is 00:53:54 Goodbye. If this podcast means something to you, it would mean so much to us. If you'd be willing to take 30 seconds to do these three things, first, can you please follow or subscribe to We Can Do Hard Things? Following the pod helps you because you'll never miss an episode and it helps us because you'll never miss an episode. To do this, just go to the We Can Do Hard Things show page on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Odyssey, or wherever you listen to podcasts. And then just tap the plus sign in the upper right hand corner or click on follow.
Starting point is 00:54:33 This is the most important thing for the pod. While you're there, if you'd be willing to give us a five star rating and review and share an episode you loved with a friend, we would be so grateful. We appreciate you very much. We Can Do Hard Things is created and hosted by Glennon Doyle, Abby Wambach, and Amanda Doyle in partnership with Odyssey. Our executive producer is Jenna Wise-Berman, and the show is produced by Lauren Legrasso,
Starting point is 00:54:58 Alison Schott, Dina Kleiner, and Bill Schultz.

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