We Might Be Drunk - Ep 137: Ian Lara & Old Fashioned Flight

Episode Date: July 24, 2023

JULY 25TH NETFLIX SOUP TO NUTS IS OUT BABY! Call in sick to work, stream it for the whole family, get a drink and enjoy the show, its the boys first Netflix hour, won't be the last. Enjoy this and share it with a friend. Ian Lara is here this week to join the guys for a banger of an ep to talk shop, movies, recs, peeves, and more. Ian Lara: https://www.ianlaralive.com/ Sam Morril: https://www.sammorril.com/ Mark Normand: http://marknormandcomedy.com/ Support the show and get 20% off &; free shipping with the code DRUNK at https://www.SheathUnderwear.com Support the show &; get 10% off your 1 st bidet order at https://www.hellotushy.com/DRUNK Shop: https://www.wemightbedrunkpod.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/wemightbedrunkpod http://www.bodegacatspirits.com We Might Be Drunk is produced, recorded and edited by Gotham Production Studios. Head producer: Matthew Peters https://www.gothamproductionstudios.com/

Hey folks here we are we might be drunk we're back it's the summertime in New York City how you feeling I'm rough man travel road hard put away yeah you know what happened I was uh all flights canceled yesterday in New York it's one of. Here's a peeve out of the gate. I got a quick peeve for you. Please. You ever on the phone with airlines and all the flights are canceled? And you're like, well, I got to get back at this time or I'm going to miss this podcast. So I have to take a 6 a.m. flight. No.

And then that got delayed. The 6 a.m. delay is the biggest peeve there is. Because you get up early. And you time it. You're like, I got a window where I could still fall asleep. Yeah. So you're like, because you're looking at your phone, your eyes are fucked, and you can't fall back asleep. Oh, I've been there.

I know it too well. So that gets delayed. A flight attendant just didn't show up. What the hell is that? What's happening in this country? Jeez. What's going on? Come on.

They were there on 9-11. They were there. I wish they did sleep in for that one did sleep yeah that's true good but you know uh i'm on the phone with a guy yesterday and he hits me with this where i go okay well i'm i'm not taking i cancel my flight i i'm gonna take another airline because i need to get in for this podcast yeah and and he goes i was able to make the cancellation. Oh, well, good job, you fucking asshole. Yeah, I would hope you were. You fucked me.

Yeah, exactly. I hate the rebook on a flight that fucks you. Yeah, they act like they're heroes. We rebooked you on a 5 a.m. Connect flight. That's what they rebooked me on. Yeah, get out of here. You know what else bugs me about these customer service queefs is you ever fight with them and they go all right fine i'll do it and you're like so you could have done it but you have to give me the pushback for

three hours but then they give in and they cave and you're like now i know you're full of shit oh it's the worst well luckily i have really good agents who booked me in texas in july so i got to spend an extra day there uh i'm sure it was uh cool weather. It was like 100 plus. It's crazy. Brutal. That's my goal weight. That's horrible. It's brutal.

It's wild down there. It's the wild west. You were in the city, though. I was in the city living easy, did some gigs all over town. Great time. Yeah. Yeah. I'm trying to run some new stuff, so I'm doing like an hour in Jersey. I'm doing a cellar hour.

I'm doing an hour in Queens. I'm really just calling in favors. Oof, yeah, an hour in Queens. That's rough. Yeah, sounds like a Spike Lee movie. An hour in Queens. Yeah, but we're on like opposite ends of our hours right now because I'm like getting replaced.

I'm like, yeah, it's almost good enough to shoot, but not quite yet. Wow, that's quick. Quick turnover. Yeah. A year and a half. Well, I guess when the special came out, yeah, it's almost good enough to shoot, but not quite yet. Wow, that's quick. Quick turnover. Yeah. A year and a half. I guess when the special came out, what, six months ago? Five months ago? Last September.

Oh, shit. Has it been that long? Yeah. Jeez, it's flying. Time flies because there's so many fucking specials. That's true, too. They don't feel special. No, no.

God, no. They really don't. Yeah. Speaking of which, I got one coming out in a little bit. I think it's out. Is it not out right now? July 25th it comes out. Hey, check it out.

July 25th, Netflix, whatever time they do. What's the title? Soup to Nuts. Because we cover everything. Soup to Nuts. I would have gone with An Hour in Queens, but that's fine. Yeah. Well, it was in Chicago, but i'll take it but it looks i

saw the intro already it looks amazing thank you thank you my boy james webb directed it webb killed it cats killed it uh jason katz all good time i had veder open i had will sylvins hosting uh the wife came out friends came out vic theater killer time i. Yeah. I'm doing the Chicago Theater September 30th. Oh, my God. Yeah. That's a legendary spot. I'm pumped. Wow.

That's a beauty. I opened for Schumer there years ago. I couldn't believe it. I got another pee for you. I'm coming with fucking peeves today. Bring on the peeves. I post a video. They asked for a promo video for Chicago.

Yeah. Love Chicago. I'm even excited to make the promo video. There you go. So I do a whole thing where I'm like the joke is I guess I make, you know, Chicago, you know,

home of Wrigley, deep dish pizza and a shooting epidemic you can't get a lid on, you know? And then I go, wait a second, that third one's bad.

Well, I got a good one for you. Sam Morrell, Chicago Theater, September 30th. Yeah. Facebook flags this. Oh, my Lord. They're like, you can't make a shooting joke.

I'm like, but you can buy the guns. Ooh. I can't make a fucking joke about the guns, but you can get the guns. Good point. Well, at least you got a bit out of it. That could be a bit. Maybe. Yeah.

It makes me crazy. It's like, it worries me when people talk about cancel culture shit. I'm like, I hate, there's nothing more boring than talking about that shit but when when you talk about it and you're like all right i don't care about people but it's the social media companies that scare the shit out of me it's some douchey robot going shooting shooting you know which is how i fuck but uh i'm like they don't even know there's no context like you get the nerd out here going hey you shouldn't say that i'm like well at least there you can talk to them the computer's just fucked there's no reasoning it's bad it's bad for the future because that's like it is it's how guys like us got fans right is through this shit and we had jokes that like bordered on the line because that's how we

make jokes there's nothing lamer than having to work within these restrictions yeah you feel like the teacher's pet like i'll do a clean joke right and if you're already clean fine but that's how we make jokes. There's nothing lamer than having to work within these restrictions. Yeah. You feel like the teacher's pet, like, I'll do a clean joke. Right. And if you're already clean, fine, but that's not how we are. It's not how we think. Exactly, and context matters. Like, with The Tonight Show, they're pretty rigid, but you can at least go, no, no, boner. I'd say boner.

It's very silly, and they're like, all right, fine, we'll give you boner, but you've got to take out homo. You've got to take out 12-year-olds. I'll take a few of those out. But, yeah, so you can at least banter. But also the internet was where we went to go be ourselves. And now the internet's getting queefy. That's what sucks.

And the awful thing is Twitter is the least restrictive. That's true. But it's also kind of the worst for sharing video stuff. I know. It's tough. Twitter's kind of become lame, too, because if you just post a joke on twitter first off no one really does that anymore i feel like it's so much just like i guess doing it so yeah i mean it's just then the attack there's so many hall monitors there yes exactly i told i said it before i did a joke about alzheimer's and

i got like eight million tweets like that's insensitive and i was like get a grip huh okay they didn't like that but uh yeah it's just like it's an alzheimer not alzheimer sorry what's the one arthritis arthritis okay i didn't get that i was like all right i said i did an arthritis joke and i got all these like hey that's ablest and all that and i was like get a grip and they didn't love that ablest is such a ridiculous i always think of the michael che joke it's like you're being offended you know on behalf on behalf of others like that to me that's the most privileged shit in the world yeah good point but uh yeah good old che che guevara but uh yeah so that was annoying but although i did do shows and i did two at the paramount in Denver, which were unreal. Oh, it's a great room.

Great room. Great town. Great town. I didn't get to see much of it because we got in a day early. Another flight problem. Three hours on the fucking runway. We missed the days of Sully. Give me Sully again.

You know, just call him in when a flight attendant doesn't show up. But you know what? We got lucky because I don't know if you heard about that shit at Red Rocks, but it was hailing the size of baseballs. What? That was my opener. I said, and the Rockies still wouldn't be able to hit it. But, you know, it was hailing the size of fucking baseballs and people getting injured at Red Rocks. Whoa.

Was it a gay band? It was actually, the guy's name was Louis Tomlinson, I found out. Taylor's dad? No, it was from One Direction. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. That was another line I said something about, finally a different Louis got canceled. Something like that.

I don't remember what I said. These are great zings you got off of. Gotta come out with the local shit. Yeah, hail Hitler. All right, that's all you got off of. Got to come out with the local shit. Yeah. Hail Hitler. All right. That's all I got out of it. We went different routes. I don't know where Hitler's coming from.

Well, you get the hail. Hail. Okay. Hail a cab. There you go. I cleaned it up. But then, yeah, Denver's killer. Dude, I've never been to Santa Fe.

Awesome place. I don't think I've ever been there either. Never done comedy there. And I'll say this, best crowd of the whole Santa Fe. Awesome place. I don't think I've ever been there either. Never done comedy there. And I'll say this, best crowd of the whole fucking weekend. Really? Denver was great. Santa Fe was my favorite. They were just electric, man.

Is that New Mexico? Yeah. Yeah, wow. I think it's the capital. Albuquerque, maybe? Or is it Santa Fe? What is it? I don't know, actually.

Give it a go. But I've never been to Santa Fe. I've been all over this country. You'll go. I'm down. Bring it on. And then hit San Antonio and Houston. Oh, Fe. I've been all over this country. I'm down. Bring it on. And then hit San Antonio and Houston. Oh, Phoenix. I'm an idiot.

Wait, that's Arizona. No, that's not the capital. New Mexico. People in the comments calling us idiots already. It's Santa Fe, right? Capitals. Real hit or miss, capitals. I think it's a rich rich town i think like oh really

i think uh one of the sacklers has a place there it's like real like rich got it uh like it's got like aspen vibes oh yeah a lot of jade a lot of hot moms in those jackets with the the dangly things hot native american women oh really yeah i'll give her a fucking go give her a cocktail okay i was worried i was gonna get heckled and get a comedian get scalped the video but let's see and here's san antonio one of the best mexican food spots oh i bet in the country for sure yeah a lot of adobe oh yeah. Well, I got to run this by you. Please. Went to my first Jewish wedding. Really?

Over the weekend. Broken glass? Broken glass. The chair up, you know. What do you call that thing you're starting to dance for? You spin in a circle with holding hands? Oh, jeez. I'm such a bad Jew.

I can't remember the name of it, but it was so fun. We all put yarmulkes on. I was home. It was great. Where was it was so fun. We all put yarmulkes on. I was home. It was great. Where was it? The Hora. Yeah, the Hora. That's what I called my wife.

That's stupid. I don't know. But, yeah, I even tore a muscle. Okay. But I had a great time. The chair up with the bride and the groom, and the woman circles the groom seven times while the rabbi goes, hey, yeah,ya, hiya, hiya, whatever. Might be Native American.

I don't think that was Jewish. Hiya, how are ya? Hiya, how are ya? But it was, you know, the singing and the whole thing. And the Jews are so funny. Like, all the speeches were killer. The groom's dad, this guy Ben Kirshenbaum, funny guy. I went with the wife

we did shrooms we had a great time wow yeah the horns came out now but um it was so fun and you saved that for theo's podcast uh rosanne's on next week check it out but uh yeah it was just so fun and the food was great and the music and, and the Hava Nagila, the whole thing was great. Oh, man, yeah, Jewish weddings can be fun. We don't really go to that many weddings. We never take time off. Yeah. Every once in a while, you're like, man, it's good to live like an actual human.

Totally, yeah. It was in the Berkshires, so you get that drive up. It's beautiful. Beautiful. The mountains, the lush trees and everything, and you're just in the middle of nowhere with a guy on a chair. It was so fun. Even this time of year, like in the fall when the leaves are changing some stuff man we're getting old we're having conversations like this when the leaves are changing colors i know it's the only time we want color oh i got i got a good rec for you too by the way please

burn through this book in like one sitting basically. Wow. It's called- The Koran. It's killer. No. I was at the Strand Bookstore, which is one of the best places in the city. Great spot. I mean, it's one of those places you could just kill hours. They got everything. Great spot.

Great people watching, too. But I'm checking out, and as I'm checking out, I see the staff recommendation place, and they have this book called My Lunches with Orson. It's Orson Welles. And it's just an interview book, which I've seen excerpts of on the internet before. Yeah. And it's – dude, I've never laughed out loud so much in my life. If he had a podcast right now, it would be the greatest podcast ever because he says just outrageous yeah by peter biskind uh edits it who

made easy riders raging bull great movie book but dude it's like you'll never laugh i send you a copy you'll never laugh so fucking hard out loud ever it's like oh really but it's not trying to be funny he's just he's just outrageous i mean in the first in the beginning of the book there's a whole thing with this guy henry jaglum meets meets him. And he's such a big fan. It's his first movie. And he's like, I just want Orson Welles to play this magician. And Peter Bogdanovich is like, he'll never do it. I'm just telling you.

I'll tell you where he's staying. You can find him, but he'll never do it. And he goes to his hotel in New York. He flies to just pitch him this movie that he's making. He's already got Jack Nicholson in it. It's a movie that did nothing. No money. But he shows up, and Orson Welles opens his hotel door in like a purple pajama set and he said he looked

like a giant grape he just opens the door yeah this is them together it's ridiculous he's like a monk but he opens the door and he ends up loving this guy because he's a very smart guy yeah but he opens the door and he goes i need you to be in this movie and he goes i never do a director's first movie and he goes i never act in that he goes but you acted in in citizen kane that was your first movie good point and he's arguing with him and he's like he's like i'll never do it under any circumstances and he goes i want you to play a magician he goes i know you were a magician he goes an amateur magician and then he goes please play this magician and he goes can i wear a cape that's all it took he was like that odd a guy but also he has these insane opinions where he just like

he says some shit that's like kind of bigoted he says but it's like hilarious sure uh he also he's also just he just knows about everything he fucked everyone yeah they'll like bring up he brings up like Marilyn Monroe and he's like oh yes I dated Marilyn for a while then he'll be like you know Rita Hayworth fucked her admits to like cutting her hair really short for ladies from Shanghai because he was mad at her so he wanted her to look shitty on screen Jesus this I love this old Hollywood shit dude it's it's you will love it but I was just laughing out loud there's so many quotes there's people that walk into the restaurant while he's interviewing him.

Yeah. And he's just rude to them. Like Richard Burden walks in with Elizabeth Taylor and they're like, Orson. And he's like, can't you see I'm in a conversation? So he's just like rude to everyone. And then he would eat healthy at the restaurant, but then go back to his hotel and order like six ribeyes. Which is like, he's just such a character and it's like it's it's about so much if you love movies this is made for you but the way he um

the way he made this masterpiece of a movie at 25 years old he made citizen came when he was 25 it's like insane you know fucked up that is to make something that good it's like what do you do with the rest of your life it's all down you're just chasing that yeah yeah i mean there's a documentary it was on netflix for like two seconds about how him trying to make this movie and it's super crazy it's a good doc it's a great doc and you see how insane he is insane he's like let's do this throw the script out you guys fuck and we're like wait what you know and but it's orson well so they all have to listen to him and then it just slowly becomes a drug-fueled psycho thing where one guy dies it's a hell of a doc i can't

think of the name yeah i watched it was so good but he all there's another scene where he's like there's a woman from hbo and he like pictures her this idea and she's like oh i don't really get he's like i'm done i'm done pitching to you he goes i saw i saw the death in your eyes and i'll never pitch you again he's just he's so he is he has this awful temper where he just can't. He's totally eccentric. Did you ever see the critic? If you can pull this up on YouTube. Oh, my God. Orson Welles, Pease.

It was so funny. I was like a nine-year-old. Like, I don't know if I get it, but it was still funny. Oh, here it is. It's beautiful. Can we play this? Yeah. Man, you're ready.

By the way, you're ready crushing Salicus. This would have taken him two hours to find. That's true. Man, the critic was so good. Could I continue with the later works of Orson Welles? That is Alan. A rich, full-bodied wine sensibly priced at a dollar a jug. Now for a little magic, I will make this jug disappear.

Roll the next clip rosebud yes rosebud frozen pea green penis wait that's terrible i quit just a handful for the road oh what the luck there's a french fry stuck in my beard oh yeah as your family attorney the 90s are mostly just fat and gay jokes that's true yeah it was a better time i mean the critic is it's like all fat jokes but it's still pretty damn great yeah and the critic was kind of fat so so he could get away with it. Damn, this show is good. Mike Reese, who co-created this show, you saw all the stories about him, right? No.

He wrote a thing for CNN. Oh, God, I thought you were going to say something bad. No, no, no, no. I mean, it is bad. He wrote that Titanic thing, the submarine that went down. He was on that? No, but he'd taken the same one four times. And he's alive?

He's alive. Oh, wow. But he wrote a thing, which it's tragic. I mean, it's like, you know, I made a shitload of jokes about it, but it'd taken the same one four times. And he's alive. He's alive. Oh, wow. But he wrote a thing, which it's tragic. I mean, it's like, you know, I mean, I made a shitload of jokes about it, but it's still horrible. By the way, do you see that Celine Dion's My Heart Will Go On is like, it's went up like 800% or something. They're playing Titanic. Netflix bought it. I know.

It's capitalizing. Yeah, someone had a tweet go viral. It was like, I forgot who it was, but it was something about if they just waited one week. I saw that. I saw that, yeah. It's perfect. They could have just watched the movie. But yeah, this guy Mike Reese also, I think he was like a season one Simpsons writer.

You've probably met him. Oh, yeah, I've seen this guy. He's been by the cellar before. When I used to have the Sage Theater Show, he would come by all the time. Right. I mean, legendary writer. Yeah. Simpsons

guy and then uh what is the submarine appeal well he in his essay he said that his wife wanted to go it was she's an adventurer and she's like i want to see it so he went with her and then they took covid tests and he passed and she had covid oh so he went without her ah and and he was like even then they lost tracking like they didn't know where the sub was but he was on with three other scientists it was a lot of people like that because people write it up like it was just like billionaires people who had I guess a lot of money to do it

but the site's good what do you get out of it yeah I think you see amazing stuff down there but like I'm not fucking rolling the dice that was my line I said I don't fly spirit you know i'm not doing that shit but uh no it's uh it's it's crazy but he wrote a whole thing about it being like he knew the guy and was like he was so safe he was like this his some sort of safety handbook was his favorite book yeah i mean i bet you see cool shit i mean

james but then you see the shit that james James Cameron went down in because he went down like 30-something times. It was obviously way better. Yeah, he's a nut. He loves nautical shit. I mean, he made The Abyss in the 80s. Never saw that one. Oh, you would love it. That's my rec.

Great movie. Great movie. The girl from Godfather, Melissa Pastriano, super whoppy name. What's her name? She's also in the color of money oh that's her that was a good flick great movie yeah there's a master tonio her she's in it she's the love interest pretty sexy uh bill pack no ed harris oh he's a great movie yeah i love dude ed harris is great and this is when he was still like trying to earn his keep because he hadn't

had terminator 2 yet james cameron so he was really cooking to earn his keep because he hadn't had Terminator 2 yet. James Cameron. So he was really cooking. Oh, man. Yeah, I never saw that. I got to see that. You know what I just watched on Criterion, which is fucking killer? Have you guys seen early Michael Mann movie called Manhunter? No.

I've heard of this. It's, dude, Brian Cox plays Hannibal Lecter. Oh, wow. So it's before Silence of the Lambs. Damn. It's pretty cool.'s a cool there's there's a couple scenes in it where you're like holy fucking shit it's it's legitimately a scary movie there was a couple scenes where i was like fuck wait stupid question is hannibal lector a

real person no i don't think so they it's based on a book isn't it so wait they're doing a same character in a different movie? No, it was a book. And I think this is more faithful to the book. Oh, it was a book. But I think that he based it on, like, a serial killer. I see. I think he was loosely based on Ed Gein.

Ed Gein. He's also the one that's based off the Texas Slaughterhouse or whatever. He's, like like a Southern serial killer who would make lampshades out of people's skin. Oh, I've heard of the lampshade guy. All right. Ikea before Ikea. Or Pier One.

It's a cool fucking movie. Okay. It's legitimately... It's that dude from NCIS, too. I'll watch anything with Cox in it. Dude, he's awesome in it. That sounded weird. There's so many.

Wow, that one went right over my head. It's so sad because he dies. I don't want to ruin it, but he dies in succession. The show's been out six months. You should see it. People should know. LA Times with that fucking spoiler. I know.

That was kind of crazy. Yeah, but I still, I'm like, I want to be in something else because I feel like he's really dead. Because that was my gateway to Cox. Wait a minute. No, it's, he's good in it. It's scary as fuck. There's scenes in it, but there's also some scenes that are just. Oh, yeah, that guy.

There's some scenes that are just so, and some scenes that are just... Oh, yeah, that guy. There's some scenes that are just so... And Joan Allen is in it. Oh, Joan Allen. Michael Mann's a fucking great director. Yeah, very stylized. Look at that. Very noir. It's very noir.

I feel like he peaked at Heat. After Heat, what's he done? I'm sorry, do you see The Insider? That's better than Heat. Do you see Collateral? Oh, I did love Collateral. I got a hot take for you Heat's a great movie

I take Insider and Collateral over Heat Wait, is that Insider? Who's that? Pacino and Russell Crowe I've never seen it That's, okay, that's my rec for you Okay, okay Never seen it

Oh, dude, the Insider's I think it's his best movie I think it's a great fucking movie Well, Collateral's great Because it's got that The dynamic between those two guys It's so good Incredible movie So so good yeah it's more than just an action movie i love heat but i don't think it's i don't think it's as good as either of these movies what it's a little long the insider watch it tell me it's not better i'll watch it this weekend i think i might have wrecked this movie

on the pod before because my my buddy craig uh told me he watched it because of me so maybe i'm must have maybe it was a patreon maybe it was a regular, but... The Insider. What's it about? A gynecologist? All right. It's about tobacco industry and corruption. It's really good.

Oh, okay. It's a really cool movie. Philip Morris. Yeah. All right. Watch it. And it's like a 60 Minutes thing. It's really cool.

Oh, Bruce McGill. I met him on a film set. What? I worked on a film set i what i worked on a film set when i was like 18 19 oh in new orleans well it was in uh san antonio of all places right you told me this and uh he was he was drinking every night he was a fun guy he's in i think he does like audio books too that guy's done like every he's been like everything though yeah i was just like animal house what was that like he was like i'll tell you all about it kid so we just get

drunk and be like belushi is really that guy he was a mess we did House, what was that like? He was like, I'll tell you all about it, kid. So we'd just get drunk and he'd be like, Belushi is really that guy. He was a mess. We did blow all night. Wow. That was awesome. Yeah, he's in a ton of shit still. He was just on Reacher, which you fucking hated, but Stav turned me on to. Stav is obsessed with Reacher.

We watched that on a ski trip and everybody's throwing shit at the screen. I was like, Sam loved it. They're like, fuck Sam. He's an idiot. We had a good time. I only watched it because of Stav, but i did enjoy it it is a guilty pleasure it's mindless it's like the bachelor for guys you know it's just a big buff dude beating people up he's got the hot lady he's ripped big and ripped you see an rfk jr yeah he's pretty big he's huge he's like a dilf is it not hilarious that he's like that his whole thing is like anti-pharma and i'm like that's not natural you it not hilarious that his whole thing is anti-pharma?

And I'm like, that's not natural. You don't think that's... Look at that guy. You tell me he's not on something. Also, we can't get this guy some gym shorts? I know. The jeans workout is kind of badass. It is kind of badass.

It's kind of like... It's like an 80s Schwarzenegger. But you're telling me there's no way this is natural. I don't know, man. 69 years old, this is natural? Well, he is a Kennedy. He's got great jeans. Yeah, I don't remember.

Yeah, well, we didn't get to see his uncle or father live this long, so we don't know. That's true. That's true. They could be superheroes. He is a hunk. But also, body types were just different back then. It wasn't stylish for dudes to just be that shredded. Isn't that weird you see bodybuilders in like the 50s and they're there's no definition they're all just mass no he does look incredible but it is also hilarious that they're putting that

scientist next to him being like who looks healthier i'm like you don't compare like a rich dude to just a scientist that's true that's like saying who looks funnier sam or a clown you're like you're gonna go with the clown every time. He's just a normal-looking guy. You know when you meet people, they go, you don't look funny. I'm like, what do you want me to do? Have an eye patch and a bird on my shoulder and a red nose? I'm a human.

Although it is like, I mean, a lot of these dudes get ripped. A lot of these, like, I mean, like, Bezos is ripped. Zuckerberg is in really good shape that's true he does uh jujitsu or one of those apparently elon musk is in like he doesn't look good shirtless but he might he's an older guy he might be strong oh yeah i think he's strong yeah i listened to some interview with him he was a big bar fight guy in his uh really college days yeah south africa was a it was a violent place damn yeah bar fight musk crazy well i think also there's something to people who keep in shape there there's something to like you can't deny that they're

you know go-getters or hard workers or consistent you know like look he he's doughy i don't know man albert einstein wasn't ripped yeah that's a good point you know point but he's a scientist. You let it slide. But look, I mean, he still has muscle under that weird, barreled, white body. Yeah, Putin, you can tell he works out. I mean, you know, he doesn't... How about that failed coup in Russia?

Yeah, what's that about? Chicken coop. Speaking of... You brought up Putin. Wow, look at that. Gee, that is a weird shape he's got. That is how men age, though. We get skinny-ass legs and guts. It all goes to the gut.

Yeah. We don't age gracefully. No, no, especially shirtless. Hey! Come join us. It's a walk-on. Come on in. It's a walk-on.

Come in. Hey, hey. Christopher Walken. No, you're on time. What's shaking? What's up, brother? How you doing? Sam, you would love this.

Oh, wait. Get that mic. Get that mic. You know Donovan Mitchell Spider, right? Yes. Out of nowhere, he just watched the special and he messaged me on Instagram. Whoa. I was talking to Liz now to get him tickets to the Cellar.

Ooh. I think he's going to the Cellar, too. Am I? Yeah. Love Spider. Let's get him with the Knicks. Yeah, I'm trying to recruit now to get him tickets to the Cellar. Ooh. I love it. Am I? Yeah. Let's get him with the Knicks. Yeah, I'm trying to recruit him with the Knicks. Although I don't know if that backcourt's going to work. Well, I mean, I would want this guy out of here and get him in.

Just keep Brunson and him. RJ trying to get RJ out of here. I like RJ, but RJ played good in the playoffs, dude. He played okay, but he's... Who's this, Donovan McNabb? Donovan is a superstar, though. He's a stud. He's a stud. I would take him.

I would take him to New York. And he wants to be here. Yeah. Every picture I see is... Yeah, he loves New York. He's like a Mets fan. He's just here all the time. Yeah, his dad works for the Mets, right?

And his... His dad works for the Mets. He's a huge Mets fan, yeah. Oh, cool. And every picture I see on social media is with Spike Lee. I'm like, we got it. He's a huge Mets fan, yeah. Oh, cool. And every picture I see on social media is with Spike Lee. I'm like, we got it. It's like a hot chick doing thirst traps. And we're like, no, we want you too, bro.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, he's great. He's great. He should have signed a max deal with Utah. We could have had him. Utah. Well, now he's in Cleveland. They traded him because he wanted out.

But I mean, who doesn't want out of Utah? I went to Milwaukee for Giannis' brother. He flew me to Milwaukee to do his podcast. Really? Canassas? Yeah, last week. I met him. Yeah, he's great.

He's great. We hung out. And I don't know. I think there's a chance for Giannis to come. Yeah, I think so. Whoa. So I've said this on the podcast because I did his benefit thing that Hasan Minhaj put together.

So I did a benefit at the Rainbow Room. Oh, wow. And Giannis comes up to me and he goes, are you a Bucks fan? I was like, fuck no, I'm a Knicks fan. And he just looked like this. And I was like, dude, I'm a New Yorker. And he goes, well, you never know where I end up next free agency. And I'm like, all right, let's be fucking big.

Yeah, it was a lot of that. Don't say that shit to me. It's kind of a weird move. Like, imagine going up to somebody, we might be drunk fan. Like, no, actually, I like Bobby Lee's pod. Like, all right. Well, I going up somebody you would we might be drunk fan like no actually i like uh bobby lee's pod like all right well i might be on we might be drunk i might be on bobby well i made some basketball jokes so we could tell i was a basketball fan ah okay okay yeah it was a lot of stuff like that where they were like yeah you know a lot of greeks in new york and we love new york and i was like yeah i tried to i tried to call stav because i

wanted to introduce him to Stav, but Stav didn't pick up. I'm like, Stav, I'm with you. Stav's making a movie right now. He's been a real pain in the ass. Okay, yeah. What's he doing, supersize me too? Sorry.

He's the Greek freak. Well, that guy started thin, Mark. This could kill Stav. Oh, yeah, good point, good point. No, I had Stav. He was supposed to come to the fucking Rainbow movie the other night,

but he literally did not have one nice outfit and he was scared. He's gonna drag me down. Yeah I was like, yeah, it's a rainbow room. You should probably put on like maybe a dress shirt. Yeah, he's like, dude I don't have any dress shirts. Yeah, I only have like velvet It's just tracksuit tracksuit Hawaiian and now he's saying like I want to go to suit supply with you Let's get a suit and I was like, all right alright but now he's like I don't you can't get Stav out of Astoria no it's very tough but if you get

the suit with him you gotta film it I want to see that tape really stretched pretty woman yeah he'll wear it like with a Hawaiian shirt

on the top it won't be what you think what the fuck did you just do oh the smoking oh man that's great why are you gonna

bring a gas chamber in front of this guy you asked for old fashions and I got a couple of nice little old fashions for you. This one is the campfire old fashion. Wow, this is next level. You can open it up, grab one. Open it up. That's great.

This is amazing. Swing that gate open. This is actually, oh, man. Oh, my, it looks like a science experiment. This is insane. This is amazing. You've outdone yourself, Beard Jew. This is great.

Oh, Beard Jew, I hear so much about you. Finally put a face on it. Greenhouse effect right here. That's what it's here for. Wow, this looks fucking great. So what, did you do anything else with the old fashioned or this just the... Yeah, so this is my own campfire spin in old fashioned.

So we have black walnut bitters. We have a couple of other extracts in there. A little rosemary. Try it out. Cheers, boys. Oh, that's delicious. The whole idea is that you're in front of a campfire with your feet on a nice pillowy carpet of pine needles.

Oh, I love this. This is great, man. This is superb. This is taking me back to when I was at summer camp. Oh, yeah. Stop touching me. The smoke just adds so much. It's tough getting a good old-fashioned.

It's not as easy as you would think. That's your drink? Yeah, I like to order. I was in D.C. last weekend, and I went to a bar with a friend, and she was like, what do you order? I was like, I get the old-fashioned. She was like, it just depends what kind of bar you have. Some bars,

you can tell they won't make a good old fashioned. Oh yeah. You can just walk in there and see it. Oh yeah. But if it's like a nice gentleman's bar,

I'd like a little. I've been watching a lot of Bar Rescue and none of these bars would make an old fashioned. I love Bar Rescue. Me too. I love it.

I've been to like a couple rescued bars. Really? Yeah, I've been to like three. Wow. And they're holding up? I used to live near one um

he rescued uh the bungalow in rockaway beach but they weren't failing they were very successful yeah they just got um ruined by hurricane uh sandy yeah hurricane sandy ruined so he just rescued it for them it was one of those episodes where he was like everything you guys do is perfect just i'll just pay like the puerto rico one yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah it was just like i've never heard of that they weren't failing no they were no but they get killed by a like a hurricane or something that's nice so he was like i mean it is nice he takes like 50 ownership in it though once he rescues it really yeah that's awkward something like that so it's like we were fine damn i didn't know about that. Yeah.

And I did, you done that club probably in Ohio, the Funny Farm? Yeah, Youngstown. That Youngstown, yeah. You got some bad stories about that. I remember when you played that shit. Yeah, they charged me to eat. Yeah, they go, get the swordfish and this bottle of wine pair as well. I'm like, yeah, what do I care? It was like $300, and I was like, that's my whole check.

You screwed me, Funny Farm. That's the mark of a true club yes charging you to eat they were upselling me on wine yeah but is that was it still in the today when you had to take the elevator up where it was on the like the fourth floor no no because i think they moved it when i did it they had moved it and the and the bar at the ground floor was a bar rescue like they were feeling their bar and i and i spoke to the bartender about what it was like too oh yeah what'd he say well he was like you know it's very reality tv show like he comes in and he just starts screaming and you're just like i just bartend here it's like a part-time gig for most people he's like you want to be ashamed they're like dude i took i worked here for like a week. Right. The guy's like, all right. I don't care. I want to become a lawyer.

He did the club in Arizona. Oh, yeah, yeah. They filled immediately, right? Yeah, they're done. They're gone. They were done right away. He was always real nice to me, Howard Hughes. Howard Hughes.

But he was that type of owner. I always liked him on a personal level, but he would go on stage and do like 30 minutes of like, why aren't you guys drinking more? And I'm like, Jesus Christ. What, are you trying to sell liquor? Yes. Yeah, yeah. And then he would like segue minutes of like, why aren't you guys drinking more? And I'm like, Jesus Christ. What, you trying to sell liquor? Yeah, yeah. And then he would like segue that into like,

fuck religion material. And I'd be like, you can't be the barkeep and Bill Hicks. You can't do both. But then, yeah, I did that club. And then the second time I worked there,

he picks me up at the airport and he just drops me off at like a Mexican restaurant. Yeah. I was like, what is this? He goes, oh, we're here now. I'm like, nowhere in the contract did it say that we're performing in the back of a mexican restaurant it was like a real like you know comedy moment where i think i was on conan the night before and then i fly and i'm like i'm performing in the back of a mexican

restaurant yeah for three i mean at least i got free ceviche but that's something that's not nothing but he got blackout he got blackout every night and i remember the first night a guy in the crowd had a fucking stroke wow so i'm on stage while a guy's having a stroke and i was just like oh my god are you okay like call an ambulance and i have to do this from the stage and howard like comes in drunk like i'm on it i'm on it calls an ambulance wait keith robinson was there all right. The joke was for like four people. All right, all right. He said two. But Howard goes on stage and starts doing shtick with the guy who's having the stroke. He goes, I've had a stroke before. I'm like, true story.

Howard had a stroke from having 14 Red Bulls and doing a ton of coke. It's not as relatable a story. He's just like a sweet old man. Yeah. So he's like, oh, I've had a stroke before. And I'm like, dude, stop doing fucking shtick. Yeah, yeah. Get this man help. It was brutal. There's a club in Seattle And I'm like, dude, stop doing fucking schtick. Yeah, yeah. So the guy with the guy.

Get this man help. Oh, it was brutal. There's a club in Seattle. I'm not going to say it because it's still going. I get off the plane. You know, a six-hour flight to Seattle. I'm hungover. It's like an 8 a.m. flight.

You land. You're just like, get me to the hotel. I need a nap. Worst rush hour in the country, too. Brutal. Is it? Oh, with Amazon and everything. So we land, and the guy, the owner, picks you up.

And you want to just take an Uber, but these guys think they're being nice yeah and the car's dirty a lot yes the car is dirty a lot there's laundry there's kids toys and all they don't think they're being nice they're saving money oh is that what it is they don't that's not a kindness of their heart thing i'll buy the uber i don't give a shit it's 28 or whatever but either way he goes we gotta make a stop and i go oh geez all right what are we doing and we had to go to the beer warehouse and load the back of the truck with beer yeah i had to help i was like all right so we're putting cases in the truck i did the same thing except we picked his wife up from work and i was like i've been on an eight hour flight yes you're exhausted and yeah same shit i remember i remember a couple years ago talking to

you and like we were just talking outside the cellar and i was just telling you like all these brutal gigs that i was doing like touring like the loony bins it's just like not that i respected you for doing that yeah i was like but i was like it's it's tough man i've been doing this for like five years it's tough to keep doing these like keep going back and then you were like no you'll get in like you'll do some a rooms and then i had the opportunity to do the A-rooms now. And it's like night and day. I just did DC Improv. I was like, this is the best thing I've ever done in my life.

What? One of the great rooms in America. I've never done it. Oh, my God. Yeah, it was just amazing. I went from the fucking Arlington Draft House to the Warner Theater. Oh, all right. There was no in between.

That's something. I know, but I always wanted to do the DC improv just because it was like a classic room. It's the best. If you do the Warner and then one of the improv, it's worth it. I know, but when you do the Draft House, it's like they give you a door deal. And the first time into the improv, they expect you're like, we're the improv. You got to take a pay cut. And I was kind of like, fuck that shit.

Yeah, yeah. They do do that. There's that we're the improv ego. And I'm like, I don't give a shit. Yeah, yeah yeah they do do that there's that we're the improv ego and i'm like i don't give a shit yeah yeah they do do that but you know a mark of a true club like literally i got off stage and i look at my phone and i get like an email it's like the tape of the show immediately i was like all right it's gonna be a good weekend yeah because you know some clubs they record it but they're like you gotta file in paperwork and we'll send it in the next year gotta go to the guy's house and get you a vhs yeah yeah you got a trench it's so weird when you do a good club like you go to comedy club on state you ever been

there no no i haven't done oh no i know i know that one yeah madison book in yeah yes i know that's that's a really good one i did punchline uh sacramento that's a great that was a good room san francisco too that's a great that's a great that's one of the best rooms and you're an sf which is great yeah you get to go to like city lights that's the name of the book city lights yeah it's awesome and you get the swan oyster depot and the dim sum and shit i love s great town i mean it's just so cool to look forward to doing something like i used to just be like oh it's gonna be brutal i know and it's like i mean i was just like fighting crowds like i was fighting crowds for like my whole career.

It makes you worse. Yeah. You get better at a headline, but then like you get, you're like a fucking dog that's in the pound and you're just like trying to bite people's heads off with these drunk hecklers. But you're like, oh, this is setting me back. Right. I'm getting too quick to try to throw a punch. Yes.

Yes. But it is a thing. But then you do the DC improv, you feel like your weights are off. You're just like, oh my God, this is like, I've been a crowd that listens this is amazing you've got to do mad i think madison might be the best yeah it's like i heard so many good things about hilarity comedy works right that's okay you never did that one no i actually i did denver improv last time which is notoriously known as being a bad club but they were under new management like i came when it was like and when i did it it was great i was like why did people sit on it and they were

like no this is a new owner that like they were 50 to john taffer yeah oh that's good to hear because that was the urban room yeah yeah yeah it was so yeah we were on the hockey room i uh i heard a story that i won't say the comic but they were like he was on stage and the mic cut off like a couple times like when he was on stage which the mic cut off like a couple of times. Like when he was on stage, which is like, you should have that fixed, right? If you need one thing. Yeah. Yeah.

You should have the microphone. But at the end of his set, it happened like a couple of times. And at the end of his set, he was like, like the mic didn't work. So if you guys don't want to pay your bill, don't pay it. And like half the people just didn't pay their bill. Whoa. And it cost the club. A manager told me it cost the club like $20,000.

Whoa. Did they take it at his pay? No, they were like, we just took the hit. Like, we just kind of, they were like going back and forth with the management. Was it a pretty successful comic? If I told you Ophir, you would be like, yeah, that was him. You'd be like, yeah.

You hear that? Wait, was that it? Bleep that. Wow, that was a guess. Did he do it as DMX or Jay-Z? Leave that in. I guessed it first guess. Really?

Damn, I've heard a million stories about that guy. But thank God we bleeped it. Oh, it's going to be bleeped? Yeah, it will be bleeped. All right, so yeah, it was him. First guess. Wow. Yeah, first guess. Just like that. He was like, you'll never guest i was like was he black he was like yeah i

was like boom easy what a rep so the specials on hbo yeah and that's the one donovan mitchell saw yeah yeah i believe that's comedy central that's the one i did the comedy central i did a half hour for comedy central they put it on on youtube and thank god yeah I know that's the only place it got watched um which is good but yeah the the HBO thing when it was on HBO Max it was like on the top of HBO Max for like days which that that helps like these celebrities they'll just watch it like yeah it's super cool so yeah so I got to like when I went to Milwaukee like the NASA like he picked me up in his Rolls Royce I was like this is insane like he's like you gotta come you gotta come to the grease he was like come you'll stay at our villa we'll fly i'm like wow that's fucking nice it's insane is there a little part as an introvert i it's all cool and fun but

then you're kind of like can i go yet do you have any of that or is that just me part of me yes but the other part of me is like i need the story man this story is insane like literally we were at dinner like i don't even know if i whatever but we were at dinner and we were talking about he was like you got to come to greece i was like i would love to go to greece like that's one of the places that i want to go he's like yeah we that's like we run greece and i was like oh yeah like i want to go and i was like oh you have to go to dominican republic which is where i'm from i was like you're gonna love dominican republic he. He's like, you know, I'm in town for two more days. I'm not kidding, he pulls out his phone, he calls like his jet guy, he's like,

could you find out how much is a jet to go to Dominican Republic tonight? And then he's like, all right, let's just go back to dinner. And I'm just sitting there like, am I gonna have to cancel my weekend to go to Dominican Republic? Yeah, I would've had to.

Like, yeah. Is there a loony bin in the Dominican Republic I could pop over it? Yeah, I would've had to, like, that'sony bin and i could pop over it yeah i would have had to like that's insane it's insane to wait dude yeah it's insane to see that's insane how the other side lives yeah ridiculous i don't know if that's i mean that's awesome but uh like sinatra used to do that like ah fuck it we're at the casino in vegas i'm bored let's go to london we'll get on my jet and i'm like i don't know if that's good. Like, it's too easy to do stuff. And then it all gets boring.

Well, come fly with me. It was like, come fly with me was like a big thing. Yeah. Air travel is like a new cool thing. Yeah. Yeah. Come fly. Yeah.

He has his own jet. He can go anywhere. That's insane. To me, it was mind-boggling to just your life like that. I know. We're talking about private travel and you're wearing a fucking Aaliy right now i know not the best i mean flying is like those private jets i hate little commercial planes yeah but those little private jets oh yeah you flew private right both of you yeah but i mean you know it's it's scary sometimes it is yeah it's also scary

i was on a private jet once where i believe it was Sandler, Judd, Spade, Rob Schneider. I'm like, I'm not even in the first fucking two paragraphs. No, no, no. Adam Sandler and friends. Yeah. Which is how they build a show. Yeah, that's tough. That's sick. I've never been on a private jet. Oh, you haven't?

No, no. Oh, you will be. That's amazing. When I see people post a private jet. Oh, you haven't? No, no. Oh, you will be. That's amazing. Like, when I see people post photos, I was like, could you, like, I mean, I've had this conversation with you. Like, this, the success that you guys reach is just insane. Like, this is just something you just started to do. You was like, hey, I want to do comedy. And then you're on a jet with, like, five of the biggest.

With Adam Sandler. It's insane. I know. I mean, think about all the jets. I mean, you've been on a bunch, right? Yeah. I was on a, the helicopter scares me more than the jet. The helicopter just because like fucking Kobe, one of the Salino and Barnes guys. There's people that just real drop off. By the way, when that happened, they had new billboards like the next week where it was just I think Barnes, Doc. It was just selena like the next week they completely was like all right we got to get new yeah and his daughter was fighting him for it because like he took him off like the entire thing

he like took over the whole thing it's like a greek tragedy that only new yorkers give a shit about yeah or it was a setup hey we might be drunk it's brought to you by sheath i know you i know you think you're being subtle but everybody can tell you're trying to casually peel your dick off your leg. I guarantee I'm wearing it right now. I'm not even going to look. See that dick. There we go.

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a living but uh yeah the plane starts shaking sometimes and you're like it's tough yeah i went i was just i went to dubai and i're like it's tough yeah i went i was just i went to dubai and i just like the 380 which is like the biggest commercial of airplane you literally don't feel anything like you right it just takes off and if you don't look out the window you just don't know what's happening that's true and it's insane some of them now have showers on it that one has a shower yeah shower bar really yeah now that i've never seen yeah shower bar the singapore airline i look like to look up fancy first class yeah singapore Shower, bar. Really? Not that I've never seen. Shower, bar. The Singapore Airlines. I like to look up fancy first class.

Yeah. Singapore Airlines, they have like, you could get a hotel room. It's kind of like a room that flows out. Well, Vir Das has that bit about it, right? You know, about the shower and the, because you have to like book out your shower. You can't use too much water. It's a whole thing. Oh, is it?

Yeah. Yeah. That seems like one of those things that you're like, is necessary i know it's like the shower in the lounge you have you been in like the american express like the showers you're like who's using this you know what people are fucking in there that's i think that's it yeah that would that would make sense it's people who just are like on an insane travel maybe like it wakes you up but like i i used to think like who the fuck are these showers in the theaters for and And then I was on a tour bus and I was like, oh, they're for guys like us. Oh, okay.

I use those all the time. Oh, do you? Yeah. I use them every day for like 10 days. Yeah. The burnt price, you're fully loaded. You're on a bus. So you get to those theaters and you're like, oh, get me in that shower.

I've been hanging out with, you know, Joey Diaz. I need a shower. This guy's spitting all over me. How's the bus life? That sounds cool. That's like that's like like summer camp shit like with your boys i mean before you got here and i saw you go play basketball it's like every day we play every day i rolled my ankle on the last day but i was doing

i was that was like it sucks because that's like the day you're like i'm fucking i'm back i'm feeling it yeah my jumper's finally going yeah yeah and then you fucking roll your ankle and you're like i'm too old to play yeah no i don't know if it was you or maybe gary posted something where you were running and i kind of saw like your thing i was like oh shit same place like like you could tell by how you move i was like i used to play well yeah i stink now but i i uh jewish lightning nicole well that was the most fun is like you just go you end up in these like pickup games on the road and you're like the best part is this one dude in portland like, I'm a big fan. And then he's like, so he's cool to me.

But then he's like, I'm going to guard. He guards my tour manager. He'll be nice to me. But he's like bumping my tour manager in a way where I'm like, this is a fight's going to fucking start. Right, right. Because they'll be cool to you. Yeah. But then they're like, no, I'm going to fuck up your friend.

Yeah, yeah. And then my manager's like, Brian's kind of a fucking, he won't back down. Like, he's a dude that will throw down sure and it got to that point where i was like shit this could get ugly yeah sometimes i'm gonna break out the fucking ymca in portland yeah because i do that sometimes on the road i'll find a gym and i'll go play like pick up but sometimes you just want to kind of like shoot around and they take it so seriously like yeah you're like i just want to show i don't want to get hurt yeah but then right because you only know one speed yeah you're like i just want to show i don't want to get hurt yeah but then

right because you only know one speed because you play like pride takes over right pride takes over yeah but they took over my neighborhood yeah but yeah yeah for sure i remember i was in like kansas city and i went to like the thing just to i honestly just wanted to shoot around and they needed like an extra guy so they asked me and i was like yeah i'll play and i'm like but i'm just taking it easy i don't got good sneakers i don't think but they start talking shit and then immediately you start like i saw i'm like i can't do this i have shows tonight yeah exactly we played in seattle and this guy was such a fucking asshole that at first it was a friendly game and he started talking so much shit to me that on game point i fucking like elbowed him off and i pulled up on a three and in there i go

night night and i drain a three on him i was like you turned me into an asshole yeah yeah yeah i said night night to it yeah that's good that's a good move i like that move man yeah i used to play when i was in high school and my my school was like ranked in the nation we were number six whoa we were the worst fucking school in the country super competitive so like that competitive thing comes out but i broke my ankle now like i don't want to play anymore i just want to chill out i can't be breaking number one injury also sucks is you guys are public figures so you're out there they can be like yes uh class act yikes you know they have shit on you now whereas you don't know this is just some guy that the why yeah yeah but it's usually just a fun game

man it's usually a fun game. And also, you score a couple times. And if you score on them, it don't matter what they say. You could just be like, you're like my son. You're like my kid. Right. You're like my kid. It's also just like the best way to exercise on the road.

You stay healthy every day. I mean, we would drink pretty much every night. But then during the day, I'm like, I'm fucking sweating. I feel good. You feel good by showtime every night that's the thing when i first started going i remember i used to like what i used to when i used to open for you it was always fun to hang out because when i started going on the road like everybody who i opened for was like now sober and they were like they were like if you would have came five years ago we would have partied all night and then i'm like i was like 25 years old i'm like all right i guess whatever

they're like eating healthy and they're sober but i'm and then i went out with you and you were like oh no we could drink till five in the morning we went to we did a gig at a roar at the casino yeah oh yeah drinking all night yeah it's in oh we gambled yeah we gambled that was right before i did the tonight show yeah right across from the basketball hall of fame we went yes we went to the basketball hall of fame but but you were on a tear. You'd never played blackjack in your life. Yeah, and I won like $600, $700. Killing it. Beginner's luck.

We're all hooting and hollering. He's the only brown guy in there. It was wild. It was good. It was fun, yeah. That was the weekend before I did the Tonight Show. Oh, yeah. The first time.

Well, you went hard. Yeah. That was... There you are. That was you at the... He was all puffy from drinking. You guys got beautiful eyes. Look at those eyes.

Gerard Kelly, yeah. You better have good eyes. Oh, my gosh. I'm going back there. You guys got the eyes of an angel. Yeah, the green eyes. You got diabetes. But, yeah.

Oh, there's Jimmy Dunn. You remember we did Bridgeport. Oh. And then in the next morning, you were like, I got COVID. I think I had it, yeah. I think I got COVID. I kicked it one day. I just sweated out.

Bridgeport is where you're lucky that's all you got in Bridgeport. That's a fucking dump. I'm there in two weeks. With the funny boys? I'm doing San Francisco, Sacramento, Bridgeport. But Stress Factory, that's an A room. It's still an A room. I mean, look, the factories is that's that's a room that's a room i mean like the club is good it's just the city is yeah the city's bad yeah the cities are yeah they all drive in you're gonna get at least one show where you get the biggest asshole heckler

who just won't stop and bring a camera because you're gonna get some content yeah lady yelling at you charging the stage whatever that's why i got chased off stage that place you got chased off the bijou theater not the but it's in bridgeport yeah it's a fucking dump they got on stage at a theater yeah wait what this was years ago this many years ago i told you this story okay yeah i i mean it was uh just an animal fucking dude just like a linebacker heckling me the whole fucking show. And it was like 25 in. I finally just like I put him down every clever way you can.

At a certain point, you're like, I'm out. I'm out of clever shit. Yeah, fuck off. I had nothing. So I just said, you're a Neanderthal. You're a dipshit. And he stood up and I was like, he's fucking enormous. So he starts walking through the stage like 6'6", built like a linebacker, just like a scary looking Italian type dude.

Yeah. And he starts trying to, I'm like, well, someone's going to stop him, right? He just starts climbing the stage like six six built like a linebacker just like a like scary looking italian type dude yeah he starts trying to i'm like well someone's gonna stop him right and he just starts climbing the stage i'm like fuck this shit so i just i had the mic i just like run off and i'm like i'm not gonna fucking fight this guy so i'm hiding in the back and some woman is yelling at me to get back on stage they have to lock the door because he was gonna try to get to me i was like i'm not going back he's a fucking animal this guy out insane So it took like seven or eight minutes, but they're like booing me. They're so mad about the show. And I'm like, I mean, this is not a great gig to begin with, but I'm like, this is a lot, whatever.

So they finally get rid of the guy after she was like scolding me. She's like, you have to go back out there. And I was like, fuck this crowd. Fuck these people. And they're booing so fucking loud. I'm holding the cordless mic. So they heard my entire interaction backstage. They hear me acting like a bitch.

They hear me calling the city garbage. And I had to go back out and do the final 30. And it sucked. So that was one of the worst. What? That was one of the worst. This is why Dave Chappelle brings Busta Rhymes to open. You know, if somebody comes on stage, you got a crew.

Well, he has issues with connecticut rogan won't do connecticut that's true chapelle won't do connecticut yeah yeah you got a point man that's brutal getting with the mic on that almost seems like unreal like a movie yeah it was it was i know it's like how the bad guy goes down in every fucking movie yeah the bike was hot the mic was the durst yeah yeah you're the what's the what's that robert durst the jinx the jinx you're the jinx it's like every movie they're like we got that The mic was hot. The mic was. The Durst. Yeah. Yeah. What's that movie? Robert Durst, The Jinx. The Jinx. Yeah, The Jinx.

It's like every movie. They're like, we got that on tape. You know, it was humiliating. And it was not a lot of money at the time. It was a lot of money. Sure. And it's a theater. Yeah.

Theater gig. It's a beautiful theater, too. Is it? Yeah. I mean, it's like one of those old timey movie theaters where like you could see a comedy show, but you could also see like Casablanca. Oh, that's right. Because I love

old-timey theaters like that, but yeah, the city is... Connecticut, it's just kind of broken because you're either in Dawson's Creek or The Wire. It's Bridgeport or Greenwich.

Was Dawson's Creek in Connecticut? I assume. Oh, I don't think so. Give that a goog. Maybe it was in South Carolina or something. No, but they...

He's right. It's like you're either in Greenwich, Connecticut, like the disparity of well-overs. Or Bridgeport, which is one of the poorest Wilmington. Not way off. Yeah, but that's where they filmed it. Is that where the actual show takes place?

No, I don't think they filmed in Wilmington. They had to film in LA, probably. Really? Probably. So much shit is filmed in Wilmington, though. North Carolina. Growing up in rural North Carolina. Oh, yeah. So much is filmed In Wilmington Yeah I mean they filmed I think one of the

Iron Man movies there Because for some reason They had some issue With Atlanta And then Wilmington Cool city Underrated city It's beautiful

Yeah it's on the beach I'm doing Wilmington Dead Crow Oh that's a good room Yeah I hooked up with Well We'll keep moving

One time I was in Vancouver They film a lot of stuff there That's true I was in Vancouver They film a lot of stuff there That's true I was in Vancouver And they were filming Deadpool Like I saw Deadpool Like he was on the bridge He lives there right

He was just like yeah Like filming That's cool Yeah It's cool when you see these things Vancouver's another one Deadpool was fucking good Yeah

Great comedy Great action But then they tried to make Like every character like that Right They would try to be like The witty super Yeah

It worked for him in Iron Man That was it Right Right Yeah But then they tried to make every character like that, right? They would try to be the witty, super smarty. Yeah. It worked for him in Iron Man. That was it. Right, right. Yeah. Spider-Man had a little bit of zing in him. But he was wholesome.

Yeah, he was a nerd. I was on the Benjamin Buttons set as a PA. Really? Yeah, they filmed in New Orleans. I was in New Orleans for that shit, I think. Oh, really? Yeah. It was like 05. It was right after Katrina. Yeah, I was there. And so the city needed money. They're like New Orleans for that shit, I think. Oh, really? Yeah. It was like 05.

It was right after Katrina. Yeah, I was there. And so the city needed money. They're like, film here. We'll take anything. And so I got David Fincher here. I got Brad Pitt. I'm like a kid in New Orleans, my hometown.

They're fucking Brad Pitt's 10 feet away from me. It was so cool. That's insane. But that made no sense that it was filmed. They added the Katrina element to that movie, and it made zero fucking sense in the plot. She was just drowning in Katrina during it. I'm like like this adds nothing to the story yeah yeah there's no timeline but the whole city was so fucked up i think they had to do something because it was so run down but sometimes i think it's weird when they don't even acknowledge it a little bit like because like i you watch friends friends was running during 9-11 and it like the

first few seasons is all scenes of the twin towers and then after that they just like they didn't like it came back in 2001 they was like that's a good point not one single thing chandler's just like could this city be any more dead thank you smelly bodies what is this an old-fashioned as well this is an old-fashioned as well? This is an old-fashioned highball. So the first one was a little heavy, it was a little strong, a little smoky. This one's like a little palate cleanser.

All right. Nice. Damn, looks great. You're killing it. It is funny. Like Succession, we were just talking about that before, and that show didn't acknowledge COVID, which I kind of appreciated. You like it.

Enough with COVID. You see a Law & Order and they'd be wearing masks, and you're like, I don't want to watch this shit. That's true, yeah, that seems. But Law & Order is supposed to be happening in real time. That's true. That's their thing, right? That's like, you literally see it.

Like, you walk down the street, you're like, you see a bunch of cop cars, like, oh, that's just Law & Order. Yeah, right, right, right. Colin Quinn's always like, they never put me in. That's like his big gripe. That was the whole thing. He's like, I've accidentally stumbled on sets. Yes, yes.

And they've never cast me. Yeah. Which is too cute. Like, yeah, you should be in a Law & Order. Yeah. Yeah. He's a legend. But that's the thing about Mulaney.

That's like, Mulaney has the quintessential Law & Order bit that will just be there forever. Oh, he does. Yeah, that's the thing. He's got that. He's got the Trump bit. I mean, I would love to have a bit like that where you just nail something. And every time you think of it. I feel like your Sluts bit. I feel like your early the Trump bit. I mean, I would love to have a bit like that where you just nail something. And every time you think of it. I feel like your sluts bit.

I feel like your early sluts bit. Your sluts bit is good. Thanks. Yeah, sluts, timeless. That was like a long. But you're not a dig in a topic guy. That's true. So you have points that are great points, but you're not a dig in a topic.

Like, yeah, millennial is like a seven minute long order. You don't have a seven minute chunk, right? No, no. But then like even, but it doesn't have to be a dig in like todd berry has that great bit about a neck tattoo he's like whenever i see a guy with a neck tattoo i always think you forgot you forgot not to do that and every time i see a neck tattoo i think of that bit yeah yeah yeah i got a great todd berry basketball story oh no don't tell me he's good no there's no way yeah but we were in montreal and blake griffin was there oh that year and uh and blake griffin is like he sees todd barry goes holy

shit is that todd barry shut up he's a comedy comedy so he's freaked out that so i tell todd i'm like dude blake griffin was shocked that it was you and like every year like once a year todd barry's like you know blake gr Blake Griffin was starstruck by me. Yeah. Yeah. I'm like, I told you that story. Yeah.

I've given you, I fed your ego unhealthily. Oh, it's so funny. It's yeah. It's, but it is true what you said. Like when you,

when you see these guys that have these chunk on bits and you're like, did they just sit down and come up with this? Or was this like, like did, was it carving away? Like, and you kept adding things. Like a gaff again or something.

Yeah. Yeah. Hot pockets. I mean, that's in there forever. I saw you do it yesterday. You had a great one with the WNBA line. I won't give it away. Oh, you were in the room?

Yeah. I was like, that's good. Oh, dang. I ran that one by you. You were like, keep that. That's good. I'm like, how OnlyFansForGuys is our WNBA? Like, nobody wants to see it.

Yeah. That one's great. I got a big pop. Oh, thanks. That's a good angle. That's funny. I ran that by a couple guys and they were all like i don't know maybe and then you liked it so that was the only thing it kept me going you know when you're a bit as new you have no confidence in it none at all yeah you know and you're so insecure about it like maybe i'm stupid but then when it works i mean but it's interesting to me that people thought that wouldn't be good like that's just like a clearly like a great analogy i've had that a lot actually people are like i don't know

about that one and then why and it'll hit why why did they say that they were just like i don't know maybe something there it's like they weren't giving me any love on it so i was like maybe maybe it's not anything because i can i can be influenced very easily about my shit being bad yeah you know one guy's like i'll read a comment one guy was like you do this for me a lot and i was like i do and i went into a shame spiral in my apartment yeah that happens to me too oh really yeah it happens to me too which is weird because part of me be like because when you see these comments you'd be like i wish i want to see these people in person because like i've never met somebody in person who was like digging me and i was like

and i felt the way about it right i was always like what like what are you like so these people but you can't get back like if you engage is like for what because you don't know shit about them yeah you should be able you should have to post like a photo of yourself like right next to the comment yes like let me see what you look like now like your fat piece of shit right now yeah now now let's go back and forth yeah because i was putting my soul out yeah now let's go back and forth yeah because i was putting my soul out yeah yeah you're seeing everything i got yeah but you know what i mean it's hard i mean the jokes just take a while so yeah that's why you need to run them by only your close friends at first to get that that like oh this is something because sometimes you take it

out too soon and it's a bold premise yeah and the crowd's like what the fuck and you're like oh it wasn't ready for a crowd i need to like sculpt this a little more yes yes right but i mean i mean come at like when i started first of all when i started comedy i didn't know much about anything i was just like i'll figure it out i knew that new york was the place to start and i'm from new york so i was like i'll figure it out and then as you go on you're doing all the open mics i like i i ran into you and you and list and one of of the things that I kind of was like, okay, I want to be like this. This is what I want to do. When you're coming up with jokes, even if the joke isn't good and if it bombs, it's a joke.

Yes. It's not like there's a mounting and there's a dismount. It's not like, what else do I got? If the joke bombs, it bombs. It's fine. But at least the work is done. It's a setup and a punch the sometimes mathematical yeah sometimes i see the comics where the work is done and it makes me feel like but you didn't do the work you just you're just using me yeah as like the work doing right right like you're fishing you're

like anything there yeah yeah it's like do the work i'll tell you if it's good or not you know as an audience member well you're like a definitely like a clear-cut joke guy and that is mark and i've talked about this like when we would do mics that is actually harder at mics as opposed to the people that are finding shit yeah when when it's like but um but but um but and then silence yeah and it's just a bunch of jaded comics yeah yeah yeah and also i remember early on like i kind of got labeled as like a go like you used to think, I was like a go-hard. What's that mean? Because I used to, like, come with jokes and have things.

They're like, why are you going so hard at this open mic? It's just an open mic. Like, why you care so much? That's hilarious. I wanted to do well. Like, I've always wanted to do well. Why are you doing the job? A go-hard is something that a lazy person will label someone who's giving a shit

to make themselves feel better about being lazy. It's like a dude hustling in a fucking basketball game. They're like, why are you going for the loose ball? Yeah. Because I'm trying to win. Trying to win the game. Yeah. It was tough for me.

Because when open mics, after doing them for a little while, I kind of was like, I was like, because you run into so many different personalities. I was like, I don't see myself in any of these guys. Oh, interesting. Not any of them. The ones that are still working. I was like, I don't see myself in any of these guys. Oh, interesting. Not any of them. Like, I had the ones that are still working. I was like, okay, me and them. Right. But most of them, I'm like, I'm nothing like this.

But then you move up and you meet other comics and you're like, oh, I'm like this. Yes, yes. Like, I do things like this. 100%. But, yeah, I remember those days were tough. And it's not just, I like this guy's act. You can see, like, oh, he's obsessed with comedy as well. He's working hard as well.

He's doing a million spots as well. Right. Like, I did New Zealand, and I went to all the bar shows because I had a couple nights off. And you want to meet the local guys. You want to see what their scene is like. And there was this one guy who was just at every bar show, and he had new shit every time, and he was hustling. And I brought him on the theater. I was like, you want to do five on the theater?

See, that's the thing. Yeah. People respect the hard work. Yeah. Almost more than, like, anything. Like, if you're like, oh, you're doing what I'm doing? All right. I'll give on the theater. I was like, you want to do five on the theater? See, that's the thing. Yeah. People respect the hard work. Yeah. Almost more than anything. You're like, oh, you're doing what I'm doing? All right. I'll give you a break.

Exactly. I see the go-hard, and I'm like, let's reward this guy. Yeah. Or gal. Me too, but we spoke about this. I'm not in that too cool for school club. No, I hate that. Too cool.

Yeah, fuck that. They take rejoicing like bombing. I'm like, I'll bomb on my own. Yeah. The bombs come. Yeah, I don't need to try. And we bonded early, because I'd be like, oh, that Gaffigan bit you're like i love that bit and some guys are like i don't watch that shit you know you're like well wait you don't like comedy yeah i do sometimes go through phases though where i can't listen to comedy i get yeah i i don't want

to be influenced but i was i was doing a lot of like long drives this week because of you know the gig so i'm like fuck it let's put on SiriusXM. A Neil Brennan bit would come on and be like, fuck, that's really good. A Vecchione bit would come on, an old Chappelle bit. And I'd be like, man. But then you get some other guys. Some of these comics, I'd be like, this is fucking horrible. Oh, there's a lot of bad.

More bad than good. A lot of ones, I'd be like, let me give this person a shot. And they'd be like, nope. Yeah. Nope. But then you hear a Vecchione bit and you'd be like, is fucking this is like a hard joke yeah you know yeah it that's it that's very interesting because like a lot of times the guys even the guys that you that you might think like are horrible they'll like kill too so it's like true like people are laughing doesn't mean i'm laughing i know i know

yeah yeah or that it's good right but it's a good point yeah and there's a lot of the same shit you just hear again and again. The topics, over and over, same topics. And the crowd work is getting so the same. I don't want to get into it because I know there's a lot of people out there who they're going to feel this. But, hey, what are you guys up to? You guys dating? That's my daughter.

Oh, that's my favorite porn site. The porn punchline is just so... Four years ago. Dates. Dates come up. Hey, we all got to move tickets with the porn punchline. There's a lot of those. And Mark and I, we talk about crowd work a lot because Mark and I, we do it.

I do it all the time. I'm trying to move fucking tickets. Same, yeah. But yeah, try to go a different way if you're doing that. I'm against unoriginality. What's your name? Kevin.vin of course it is what does that mean his name's kevin that's what his mom named him what do you mean you'd say that for any name yeah yeah i i i i have like a i feel like my perspective on um crowd work even before the clips thing like i always thought that crowd work was inherently hacky like it's not in a bad way

but it's just like you ask the same things and as a comedian you kind of all go through the same but you try to do your best to be as original as you can like yeah and some people don't even try that right right they're just like the easiest thing crowd work is the thing like of course we're funny on our feet we're professional comics right the written bit is much harder and i was always working toward the written bit but like for crowd work it's like all right i'll do an hour or something on stage i'll do an hour 10 maybe and then three minutes two minutes of crowd work yeah and if i get a funny moment i'm like i'll burn that because i don't want to burn the joke same but and there's amazing crowd work out there like todd berry's great big jay's great

and ian bagg kills it there's a lot of great crowd work there's and there are original ways but yeah there you have to make sure not to fall into the tropes that are just so fucking yeah it's easy you have to like it's sometimes the first thing that pops into my head i'm like don't say it yeah yeah yeah the other thing is yeah something else yeah there are original ways for sure but even like the guys you've named i've seen them do crowd work where i'm like i have heard this sure because inherently we're asking the same questions and you find in like the quickest thing the funny but you said something one time that i was like oh

yeah that is true where you were talking about like getting into it like you want to ask original questions right but like getting into it like the where you from what do you do how long you guys been together you have to get into it that way you can't just be like what's your favorite sex position you know like you have seen people do just straight into that and you're like what do you do you sit down the first date like you like anal yeah right right what are you doing yeah sometimes you can do that like stav's crowd they're ready they know they know that's coming they're prepared even stave will kind of like massage it stave will kind of what do you what are we doing here we're getting fucking lit up what is this it's gonna come later don't worry

ladies man leon phelps what is this glass i forgot about the ladies man underrated movie yeah good movie i worked with him oh yeah for him yeah i opened him in el paso yeah he was it's funny he was like uh like like he kind of was mean to everyone, but he just took a liking to me. Oh, nice. So anyone wanted to talk to him, they kind of had to talk to me. He was like, talk to him. Unless it's a woman. He's like, ooh, it's a lady.

Yeah, yeah. He's good. Tim Meadows, yeah. I forgot about it. I don't know. I think he quit. No, he's still around. Oh, he's still around?

He's acting and shit still. No, I mean, stand up. No, no, he's still he's acting and shit no I mean stand up no no he's still not there he was just in I Think You Should Leave season 3 oh alright Tim Robinson

shout out season 3 he's great he's still touring we went to see a game we was in Texas we went to see a game at El Paso the college

I forgot the name UTEP I think and and all like he's in Mean Girls oh he's great so all the white girls just kept coming up to him like oh my god are you the guy that's hilarious yeah it was great in that movie yeah

he's a great actor yeah he's the grove i've done the girl oh my god and uh remember him in uh that john c rylan walk hard oh yeah oh my god he's fucking funny in that movie did you ever think you'd be doing the same rooms as tim meadows? Like, I was a kid watching this guy on SNL, and now we're in the same rooms. Well, you're doing theaters, let's be honest. Wow. I've done all these. Blue Room, Jimmy Gill's Club in Vegas. You did that?

Yeah, SideSplitters. SideSplitters is a classic. Many times. Great club. He's out there. I played SideSplitters for, like, over 10 years. Yeah? Oh, yeah.

I love them. Yeah. He's out there. I played side splitters for like over 10 years. Yeah? Oh, yeah. I love them. Yeah. That's home. I'm doing, I think I'm doing the Grove, I mean the Wesley Chapel one though, not the Oh, yeah, yeah. The new room. The movie theater one. Yeah, yeah.

Which I've done a couple movie theaters ones, but it can be good. Yeah, yeah. It can be good. I feel like the acoustics in the movie theater are not bad for comedy. Definitely. Who's the person that you work with, like up that you're like holy shit i can't believe i'm opening for this person yeah um probably i mean when i opened for tim meadows that was like a big deal because i was like ladies man like that was really cool i was like all right i want

to make sure i get a photo um but but comedy comedic-wise, in that time, like 2016, 2017, when I got to work with Norman, it was a big deal. Because he was just not like my idol, but you were just killing it at that point. I feel like everybody has this time, and especially when you come up in New York, everybody has this time right before you reach the next level where you're like, every room, you're just killing it in every room.

People don't know who you are that much, like every room you go into there's a couple people and they're like you got to watch this person i'll tell you one thing fun about being at a like a theater level is you get to you can see down and like oh he's gonna be there you can see who's working hard and who's who's killing and coming up with original shit and you can kind of tell like oh him or her is gonna pop it's gonna be big the gift of seeing down that's important like when you have it to like impart that on people because you know when you're coming up you're just like should i just quit i know i thought that every week yeah so when people give those compliments it's nice but yeah when i got to like when i got to work with them it was just like i remember that time it's like

when you got no credits just like a comic you think is funny telling you that a bit was good that'll keep you going for like two years oh hell mark turned me on to you dude i mean mark was like you got to see this guy i was like oh let me watch him he turned me on to he he wrecked me at the cellar the tonight show like all those things like it was just like if you're working hard you got jokes why the hell not yeah yeah it's funny because i feel like in in the younger guy scene you kind of have a reputation of like Mark hates everything and I was like

but he helped me do this he got me this he got me that I don't know do you have that to me he doesn't have that well I hate the hacks you know

yeah but Mark's also like you know he's passionate he's you know yeah yeah but Seinfeld that's what they say

about abusive boyfriends he's passionate yeah yeah I have a bit about him I'm like he loves hard he loves hard he bit about him. I'm like, he loves hard. He loves hard. He loves hard. That's a good movie title.

He loves hard. He loves hard. He just loves hard, man. It came forward. I remember I was talking to Ronan and he said Yukano was like that for him. Oh, yeah.

That's right. I love Ronan. And yeah, I mean, he was just going so fucking hard. He kills. His bits were original. His killing on

stage was like yeah on a level that i was like oh shit this is like yeah he's next yeah yeah kill and we can just work on the personality everything and the look a little bit a little charisma come on now he's just his jokes are so good that i was just like i went to his taping and i was like holy shit this guy's murdering. Is that what's that one called? Live from the Underground? That's a great special. He was coming fucking hard on that one.

He always does. That's where he's always been. I think I wrecked him at the cellar. If I'm not wrong. I think he said you did. Yeah, I did actually. I got a good track record there. I got him him at the cellar, if I'm not wrong. I think you did. I think you said you did. Yeah, I did, actually. Yeah, I got a good track record there. Do you?

I got him, I got Dina, and I got- Where's Dina? She's- I haven't seen her in a while. You haven't seen her in a while? I'm going to check in with her, actually. I'm producing her special. That's going to be out September, I believe, on Amazon.

So keep your eyes out for Dina Hashim. September 11th. Awesome. My birthday. Yeah, dude. She's Muslim. Yeah, who? So Dina, Ron and i and this is a weird one i wrecked james madden years ago there yeah because she was like i need a host and uh i was like james madden is like so long ago and she was like huh and ryan hamilton and nikki glazer were at the

table and they were like yes james madden like nikki goes best host in the table and they were like, yes, James Madden, like Nikki goes, best host in the city. And I was like, that was good. She brought him in to do a set and it didn't go well. And she was like, eh. And I was like, come on, like, trust me, just let him host. And then years later they brought him back. So that was my only one that didn't get passed. Yeah, he did warm up for my HBO.

He just said, he can just go. And his energy is so positive. He doesn't have to stop talking. He can just go. I got a record, which is He doesn't have to stop talking. He can just go. I got a reckon, which is, I'm like fairly new. I've only been here like three years. So the fact that he would even take my recommendation. Oh, I think he meant like a wreck for the podcast.

Oh, I do that too. But I had a reckon at the cellar, which wasn't a hard sell. I wrecked Marcelo. He's on SNL. Oh, yeah. He kills it. Yeah, I wrecked Marcelo. And I jumped on Sean Murphy. Oh, yeah, yeah. Wrecked Sean murphy he's funny him me soda i think

oh nice yeah nice sean murphy yeah check him out he's got a special on youtube called neil funny guy he needs a fucking lifeline do you have an actually like a pod rec oh yeah yeah because yeah i had a rec it's funny i didn't know this was gonna be but i actually got gifted one of the smoke things for for the whiskey. I was going to wreck that. It's like a smoker thing, but it's for an at-home bar. So I do it. It has this little thing, and then you put...

What do you put in it? What's the things? Put like a cedar wood chips. It can be any kind of wood chips. The wood chips. Then you burn them. And then I got three different flavored wood chips, and then you burn them, and then you put it in your whiskey, and you can have a smoked out whiskey.

That's a great wreck. I'm going to get one. I'm going to get one i'm gonna get one yeah put it on amazon pull it up there peters we actually have some right here this is weird this is like a cooking show yeah uh let's see who sent this to us we got someone sent it in nice yeah we got we got a couple of them qr says want one tree heartheart These are actually really cool This is the same style that most of them are It's called a volcano smoke You just put it right on top of the glass

You put the wood chips in here, you light them up Put them up It was a Christmas gift, it was great Do you do it for just regular whiskey or do you do it only for like a Manhattan or an old fashioned I do it straight, I do it with a whiskey You can do it with anything You can do it with a regular whiskey manhattan or an old i do it straight i do it with a whiskey you could do it with anything yeah you do with a regular whiskey or whatever whiskey with the with the uh ice that's it i was gonna do it for like all three of you guys but it'd just be like awkward to put three

of them out so i went a little fancier with you guys but uh uh but yeah no these are these are really great like any kind of volcano they're called volcano smokers all right okay yeah good yeah that's a like if you have that if if you bring a lady over and you pull out a volcano smoker that's a game changer it's super easy yeah and it's not she's like what they get dizzy from the smoke also like what you what you gotta do is you gotta get the golden torch like you get these golden torches from amazon yeah like a little butane torch like this but it's golden like the like Nick Cage's golden guns. Yeah, that's what we have it say less That's how we do it and is that face off? Yeah. No, no. Yes. Yes. Yes. I was on TV the other day

That's a fucking great movie great great action movie. It's just so over the diamond grade. Yeah way over the top I mean it makes no sense. Yeah, it's still great. I see my new one the Unbelievable way to yeah great and he's seen a new one uh the unbelievable weight of yeah yeah it's fun whatever it's great yeah i enjoy they make a golden guns reference there you go you didn't like it i watched on a flight it was fun it's a good plane movie yeah better than final destination which i've also watched on a plane i watched babylon i flew to australia so i watched babylon good i want yeah it's great i watched the malaysia missing plane watched on a plane. I watched Babylon. I flew to Australia, so I watched Babylon. Babylon's good? Yeah, it's great. I watched a Malaysia missing plane doc on a plane.

Really? Why would you do that to yourself? Yeah. Easy, Chia. They're going to come after you. Did you see that shit? Yeah, I was with her when it happened. Oh, really?

Yeah, we were doing a corporate at Gotham where she was literally sitting next to me. She was like, I think I'm getting canceled right now. And I'm like, what are you talking about? She was like, no. She was like, was literally sitting next to me she was like i think i'm getting canceled right now and i'm like what are you talking about she was like no she was like i'm getting these malaysian hate things i think they they're like secret service is like searching for me and i'm like it's malaysia that's not real and then it was real i can't even find their planes yeah yeah it was real her instagram got deactivated like they took her down i didn't know that yeah but not not not instagram they reported like, enough people reported her page for, like, hate speech, which she had to fight it.

She's probably mad now, bro. Yeah, it's insane. Yeah. I mean, we think we have it bad here, and then you see that shit. That's true. Malaysia has a really crazy, like, Internet police, like, cybersecurity police that they just started a couple years ago. It's intense.

And especially, like, even because it because, like, a majority Muslim country, it's, like, a lot of pornography. Oh, is it Muslim? It's not, like, Saudi Arabia Muslim, but, like, the majority of the people there are Muslim, and the government kind of, like, goes towards that. So, like, they have, like, really crazy internet police. All right. Well, hey, keep making those cheap shirts because I'll buy them.

Malaysia, I support you. It's a fucking good place. Malaysia, I support you. It's a fucking good place though. I love it. She's not even Malaysian though. She's from Singapore. Yeah. Oh yeah, well they're...

They had to call like, it was like a diplomatic, like they had to call in diplomats to like, to like resolve this. Are we getting nuked? No. A comedy routine has gone viral.

Yeah. And it's not kind to us. At the seller, I think the seller took down the thing. Whoa. They got like 5 000 negative reviews i saw that which is like gosh yeah they had to i did a dalai lama clip you know when he was licking kids or whatever and all these uh dalai lama people were like how dare you blah blah and

they would share it and go don't follow this guy i'm like keep sharing it get it out there and by the way if you do that you should have to write we're pro kid tucks tongue sucking because that's what he said i maybe that's a joke i don't understand but it's not my humor yeah either way you'll be real popular in china now yeah uh-huh yeah well it's a hot video either way it was yeah do you guys have rex we i had one before we got here about uh this book orson welles uh my lunches with orson and a movie called a manhunter michael man from the 80s yeah fucking incredible i'd never seen it yeah it's just like uh man great soundtrack great score yeah scary as fuck yeah just a cool movie i got a rec and a non-rec. Did you watch the Schwarzenegger doc?

No, it's on my queue though. It's fun just to see like this guy fucking made it from a farm in Austria to like the biggest guy on the planet, which is crazy to watch, but he doesn't come off great. Why? Well, he's just super cocky. And at one point he gets, he's in the bodybuilding competition and he tricks a guy and he goes hey good job you're done and the guy was still his time was still being counted so he walked off stage early and then i won so i'm like you kind of fucked over your friend yes he talks about meeting uh the kennedy lady whatever her name is river shriver and uh the mom comes over

like my daughter wants to meet you and he goes she's got a great ass and the mom comes over like, my daughter wants to meet you. And he goes, she's got a great ass. And the mom's like, what? I don't know. He doesn't come off great. Well, I mean, he did impregnate his maid. Yeah, that too. And he groped a shitload of women. That's all in there.

But he is a fucking legend. He's a legend. I loved him. He was a big Hummer guy. He's all over the Hummer. And you're like, well, those aren't good either. He's also done a lot of good shit for Jews. Really? like really oh man during all the rise in anti-semitism he gave this great speech about the night of broken glass in austria i thought it was pretty

yeah he's he's very articulate i mean he was a fucking governor true have you have you uh done comedy in israel i haven't i would like to yeah i did how was it tour through it was great i mean for me it was great i was like the guy the fish out of you know that when you get that push of like he's not from here so we're gonna listen more oh the exotic novelty the novelty yeah it was it was amazing i did like seven cities i did uh i did tel aviv i did ranana i did beishemish i did uh jerusalem i gotta do that yeah it was great i'd love to do that too we, it was great. I'd love to do that, too. We should do a tour. Should we do a We Might Be Drunk in Jerusalem? Oh, I would love that. Tel Aviv is the biggest party city that I've ever been to.

Really? I mean, it's insane. It's like Girls Gone Wild. What? Yeah. Wow. Yeah, we got to go. Let's do it.

Well, here's what I don't get about the birthright. Let's do a fucking co-headlining thing and see if we can- I would love to. It's a big flight. How long? What is it, 20 hours? No, it's 10 hours oh really?

we should do that oh alright I want to go to Israel I've never fucking been look yeah Tel Aviv that's what it is it's like that holy shit

and Tel Aviv it's just the most beautiful people I've ever seen I bet I'll start doing sit ups dude the women the men everyone's shirtless like they're just

beautiful people do you know how much I have to exercise just to not be a fat piece of shit with how much we drink yeah yeah yeah

but you know matt ruby has that great joke about every time people come to america they get ruined like you go to see jews out there they're all hot and sexy and ripped yeah and then here it's just like woody allen you know and then the granks well you go to greece greece it's all these hot cool guys you know they're swarthy and sexy and then here it's just diner. It's a good bit. It's Stavros. But yeah, wow, look at that. We're not doing our people proud over here.

No, we really aren't. But look at these. These people are good looking. I love Stav, man. Stav was one of those people, like, we kind of started off, like, at a similar time. And, like, he's one of the people you just see immediately. You're just like, this guy's hilarious. Oh, I like him.

Like, just immediately. Fun. He's, like, just so funny. And he gets laid funny one of my best buds yeah yo yeah he's yeah it cleans up yeah i got i got um he asked me to come uh work with him when he was doing uh the wilbur and so we hung out that weekend and it was just i'm like stav you've built this life that you've built it's just amazing amazing you and your boys like it was like elvis and yeah it was elvis it was no like it wasn't rockstar like we did two shows we ordered like thai like a feast between shows so we just did a show and then it was a thai feast and then we just ate like fucking kings and then we just did the show and then that

was it like that was just rockstar lifestyle it was just and he'll go eat some lady's ass later too you know good for him he's killing it he lost a tooth with eating pussy that helped that was he's the first person to lose a tooth it helped his career help this swag yeah didn't give a fuck right most people were like oh my god my faith and he was like yeah whatever no yeah i saw a bunch of girls at the stand one night they were rating who are the hottest comics and stavros got in like the top 10 and And I'm like, wait, what? And they're like, there's something about him. He just oozes. And I'm like, he's oozing grease.

Yeah. What are you talking about? My niece, she works at the stand. She's a waitress at the stand. And she sends me like photos of Stavros. She's like, I love him. I'm like, he's naked. He's eating Chinese food on a car hood.

She's like, nah, I love him though. I mean, I love him too. He's got something. He got it. He figured it out, man. When when you're yourself that just being yourself is like the key that's one of the cool things about comedy is like you know some comics will say crazy shit they're like fuck this guy he's a piece of shit and then some comics will say crazy shit and they're like but you can see he's a good person but he is i mean that's the truth he's like yeah he's i mean i i had conversations with him where i'm like i had to kind of fight back on how liberal he is where i'm like stop that's a little far like you're getting rich

the socialism shit ain't gonna fly anymore yeah i'm like stop yeah well yeah it's a there's that great oscar wilde quote uh be yourself everyone else is taken yeah that's that's like so true i mean comedy is so hard to be right because you just like you see fucking melania you're like i just want to be that i know i have that problem that's why i don't watch a lot because i want to just keep my fucking blinders on and just be who i am and i it's so easy to get influenced even on like a you know subconscious level the cadence could influence you uh uh a premise so it's like i try to distance myself from comedy but every once in a while like i love comedy. I want to watch it. Totally. I heard Joey Diaz one time.

He was saying that he saw Mulaney, and he was like, I want to be that. I saw that clip. You're so far off that, and what you do is so you. Yeah, be you. But you see it kill. You just get like, I want to do that. I saw Mulaney do New in Town. I was live. I was there.

I went because I was a fan, and brought a lady and she was like who's he like i fuck you yeah it's great yeah and he's like a cute clean cut guy and he's murdering i still think it's his best work yeah and uh i was like i gotta be more like that yeah but that's not that's not true but you think that in the moment yeah you do it's hard there's certain hours you just can't top you just put so much blood and sweat into that shit it's just hard yeah i'm a big i'm a big believer of that where i'm like when you hear comedians talk obviously you're trying to plug something so you're always like this is the best thing i've done but it's like yeah that's not that's not true i got this is my best special by far i think do you what's your best special i mean i think out to lunch but i ran it for four years so you

can't compete with that time. You put so much fucking. Out to Lunch is the one you did in LA? Yeah, the big YouTube one. Most people say is the Schumer one for you. What? Yeah, like people say that. Oh, that one I feel like has a lot of holes in it. But I'll take it.

Yeah, people say it. Like on the road, like when you hear people, they'll be like, that was so good. Wow, that's shocking. That was your one too, Schumer's one. I did one for Schumer, yeah. That wasn't I Got This, that's shocking. That was your one, too. Schumer's one. I did one for Schumer, yeah. That wasn't I Got This. No, I Got This was the one I did.

Positive Influence was the one that Andy produced. Oh, that was the seller one. Yeah. I think that was my best. I've seen both. Positive Influence is great. I think they're both there. Thank you, man.

I was just so angry and hungry when I did I Got This. I kind of like no one will buy this fuck it I'm fucking murdering that's the same thing like when I got our careers mirrored each others we had Amy both produce this and I know you guys won't remember this but I remember you told me that you guys were going to release on YouTube and you guys were worried about it and I was like

it's the way to do it it's going to change the game wow no Louis told the way to do it. It's going to change the game. Wow. Louis told me not to do it. People told me not to do it. I know. I was like, it's going to change the game. You guys do it.

But then you also started a precedent of, like, everyone thinking they could do it. But it's like, well, you have to be talented and good. Well, we also hit it at the right time. There's a lot of factors going on. Pandemic. Yeah, right. There's a lot working for both of us with those releases. Yeah.

And the talent. That's, like, talent. That's important. What were you going to say about HBO? About which HBO? Oh, I thought you were going to say something about your thing. No, no. I was saying... I don't want to get back on you.

No, I was just saying that, yeah, like positive influence. I mean, but they're all great. Like one time I got stuck at the cellar with Louie, which was random. Not stuck. Like I was sitting there. He just walked in. He blocked the door? Yeah, he just stuck at the cello with Louie, which was random. Not stuck. I was sitting there. He just walked in. He blocked the door? Yeah, he just sat at the table.

You sure are pretty. He just sat at the table. It was just me and him talking for two hours. Talking to him. Just one-on-one, no interruptions. It was amazing. And I kind of got to pick his brain and talk about it. And he's like, yeah, you don't just get better.

There's no art form where you just get better. You get great, and then you get your fans fans and they'll always follow you he was like i always tour he told me he was like he he doesn't think he'll ever be as good as he was in 2009 i think that's no he said it wasn't even uh a special i think it was chewed up but he said he he re-watched a special uh a tape not even a special just a set that he did in like some brooklyn show yeah he was like i'll never be as funny as this wow patrice said the same thing but she's like i'll never be as funny as when i was like 19 yeah yeah because he was just like i had to be funny no one knew who you were you had to work the whole room yeah oh i was gonna say about you you said you were so angry um the the the

when i got uh when i finally did new faces i was so angry that i hadn't went and all my friends had went yes that like when i did the set like you supposed so angry that i hadn't went and all my friends had went yes that like when i did the set like you supposed to do like six seven minutes i blew the light i did like 10 minutes where i was just like like i was trying to like level the room like i'm here yeah like it was like what the fuck and all like i had yamanika hosting too and she i love yamanika but like on the intro she kind of got me more mad she was like this next guy like i don't even know why he's doing this like he ran over from the cellar to do a spot on this he should have went years ago she did like a three minute intro she was like you guys are ridiculous like this guy should have been way and i was like yeah yeah that's great all right yum yeah and then it

was a hot crowd at new york comedy club and i just fucking like i just like i did like 10 minutes i murdered i just left like i was like i don't this. Yeah, because you don't need it. Yeah, that's a year I got it. It was like five auditions. I love that. I'm going this year. Me too. I'm doing like, are you there Wednesday the 26th? Yeah.

You want to open my show? Sure. Yeah. Let's do it. I'm doing variety. I got comics to watch. Hell yeah. There's a step down, my show.

You'll be there. I'm sure I won't be there. No, it's going to be cool. What room? Do you know? I don't remember. But they have such an ego, Montreal. you'll be there I'm sure I won't be there no it's gonna be cool but uh what room do you know I don't remember but it's but it's

they have such an ego Montreal and it's one of those things where I'm like I'm happy to do it but the ego to me is like this ain't 1994

you're not doing your festival and giving me a sitcom not that I even fucking want one so it's that thing where you're like who cares

festivals to me are so overblown and they're so they're so to me they're just fun to hang it's fun they're fun that's all they are yeah other than that i'm like i don't give a shit yeah i'd rather just do my own thing yeah a festival you feel like you're you know i'm taking a shuttle you're someone else's mercy you gotta get a badge i'm like what the fuck is this shit i mean i in hindsight though like at the time i was like miserable and

every time that the list came out and i didn't get it i was like i don't know what i'm not yeah mark and i were ever on list not really we got over that quickly yeah but in hindsight i'm like i'm so glad that i got it like organically like i was doing it for 12 years like i've been doing comedy for 12 years i've been in new york every night like any new york comic would if you ask about me they'll be like oh yeah he's been here like he's not like that's an overnight thing yeah it doesn't feel like a fluke yeah i remember the first time i did the tonight show you i think you messaged like you told me that like somebody brought it up at the table and everybody at the table was like yes he should get it he deserves it and to me that was like bigger than doing the tonight show of course the fact that my contemporaries agreed that i deserve that opportunity i completely agree

as a guy with some success to me the people go what's the biggest moment in your life whatever was your big thing it's being able to go hey let me get this show in chickpea going and it sells out immediately and you can work out material that's amazing that's number one comfort comfort but just being like i can go there i can work out and people will buy tickets you know it's not like you got to promote you got to paper half the room it's just like it'll sell out you can work out you can leave the stress of promoting it never goes away yeah but it goes a little away yeah i mean like look they keep booking you in bigger venues you're like fuck i do a morning thing to promote this i gotta do this do this. I got to keep posting and shit. But, like, you know you'll be okay in that.

Jesus Christ, what are we doing this for? Oh, boy, you got, like, a three-course meal here. That's what I'm saying. This is dessert right here. What is that? This is a little, another riff on an old-fashioned. Peach old-fashioned. Peach.

I like that he has, like, dandy words for it. Another rare find. I'm like, what, alcoholism? Us killing ourselves slowly? I got four shows tonight. I got two, I think. If you're making your life, you gotta make it look pretty, you know? It does look very nice. The coupe glass, the peach

on the stick. Maybe your best work of the whole episode. Whoa! The closer! Jesus Christ. This is Mariano Rivera. A little burnt brown sugar on top of the peach. Oh, man. Jesus Christ.

All right, I'll get to that in one minute. Just going to clean this up. I love it. It was great. Unreal. Yeah. You're an artiste.

I remember, speaking of this, I remember watching Comedian as a young comic. I watched it 800 times. It's on Netflix now. Orny was going like, I wish I could be a public figure. I wish I could be a celebrity. I just went to Celebrity, and I'm like, I remember thinking,

you're in every club in New York. You're running around. You're doing Letterman. You're still upset? You ungrateful cunt? Yeah, but then you kind of go through it, and it doesn't go away, right? I'm in every club and then you look at the guy you're like damn you sold out how many shows yeah oh dude jerry is still hangs on the shit that you're like that still pisses you off

yeah same with rock i remember reading an obituary for lucian who is the booker at the comic and they asked chris rock what he thought of him and he said the the quote he gave was something along the lines of well he passed this guy and not me and i'm like you're chris rock and you still hold and maybe that maybe you need that on some level he's still a human maybe you need that fuel which is funny to kind of put on bookers because it's like i i don't have that because i'm like you're allowed to make mistakes like you're allowed to be wrong that's a good on your pick you know like i've been wrong how many times you've watched the draft and you're like this guy's a short thing and then he's not yeah but you're not an nba scout yeah but they're

not a comedy scout either if we're really talking about it i mean i guess an elite room in new york they should know better i think i think so too yeah interesting i think hacks win sometimes and i think look looking at hacks is short-sighted. It's like the guy with all the hype who doesn't try that hard. It's almost like going with a guy who's got no ceiling but is flashy right now. As opposed to someone where you're like, this person could grow into something great. I think as a booker, you do have a responsibility to invest. I think so too. But I think it gets muddied a have a responsibility to invest oh i think so too

but i think it gets muddied a lot yeah because they're businessmen especially now with like social media now they're like you got how many followers yeah you're past oh that's very muddy yeah it gets muddied but it depends what you want to build it's short money do you want to build a great tiktok comedy club or do you want to build a great comedy club but it's also you got to keep the lights that's what i'm saying some of the club is like well i need to stay open yeah this guy's gonna fill it up so give him a wednesday night yeah yeah there you go you also give him a weekend yeah that's the thing when i first like when i i mean i've been on the road for like a couple years now but like after the special when i really wanted like a set of tour and get out there

like a lot of the offers were like one-nighters and i was like no i don't want to do a one-nighter like if a club doesn't want to like invest in a weekend and meet then fine we'll that's what i'm saying back whenever you and laura the weekend they give uh harry the tiktok star you know whatever i'm making up a name here yeah yeah you got to throw it back you know that club that always used you and believed in you yeah go back and sell out a weekend in five years when you have when you can move tickets yeah yeah um back yeah i i always yeah i always like was like you know what if the club don't want to do it like whatever like i sometimes i meet like i'll talk to comics who are like they're like you know when you're not really selling

tickets like that you go on the road and you do a club and if you don't really sell out you kind of feel bad but i always remind myself i don't feel bad like i didn't sell you you didn't you didn't pay me like i was supposed to sell out your club right you guys will sell out a club you get a fee for selling out the club you paid me the basic fee for being a professional comedian which is what i am i've done all the things i've done open mics for years i've done the tonight show i've done comedy central i've done hbl so this is it like you're gonna get a good show whether it sells or not i want to sell but if i don't i'm not like but you're growing yeah and yeah and it's each year is gonna be better than the last for you that's that's i it's been like that so far i want to

keep it that way yeah yeah rolls royce pick up at the airport yeah that was pretty cool that was cool that when i was in that rolls royce i was like i understand why some women are gold diggers you rub your foot through that carpet you're like yeah it makes sense yeah you're like i feel safe yeah you can't stop your head from going down you're like what do we do yeah for sure yeah that was a good experience that was cool i mean i keep every time you know when you're coming up you do these cool experiences and you sometimes you gotta like you get home and you're like i can't believe that was a thing i did well i always say the best comics have that uh you know when you get checked you know like let's say you became a zillionaire and you're just like fucking i'm in rolls royces

i'm getting blown every night i don't need to go up but your friend goes hey come on man what are you doing you got to go up you got to go up but the best comics have that guy inside they have that check guy like david Attell. He kills. He walks off stage. He's like, I'm a hack. I suck. And you're like, are you kidding? You're a genius.

You're the funniest guy on the planet, whatever. And he's hilarious. And he's probably got 20 minutes on the submarine thing. Well, now you ask me what was a guy I opened up. I opened up for Attell like two years in. I hosted one night at like bananas on like a thursday and and they saw me and they were like jersey yeah yeah and they were like they saw me and then the next morning i get a call they're like we want you to come back and open for a tell

like i'm a new i'm like two and a half years in that's a nice moment yeah and i'm like are you kidding me like you guys like me yeah come open for a tell but they were like but the only thing is like you gotta be completely clean like, you got to be completely clean. Like, no cursing, nothing dirty, completely clean. Yeah, and I was like, no problem. I was like, whatever you guys want, I'll do it. So I go, I do the show, completely clean is fine. Bring up a tell, he murders.

In between shows, I'm talking to a tell, and I'm like, yeah, you know, we're just talking about comedy. I'm like, yeah, it was a little difficult because I couldn't curse at all. He was like, why can't you curse? I was like, the club told me to be clean. And he was like, they told you to be clean for me and i was like yeah they said not that not to be dirty for you he was like for the second show add a curse to every punchline he told me that i was like that's when i was like all right you're a legend he's like i want you to add a curse to every punchline i was talking to my fucking mom. And you know what the bitch says to me? The bitch tells me.

Yeah. He's just great. I love it. Yeah, he's a legend. And not a great sign for the club. Like, come on. Let the guy. No, but now I get it, though.

Now that I headline, I get it, though. Because you tell a new comic, you got to tell a new comic that. Because sometimes they go up there and they're just cursing aimlessly. That's true. Like, it's just aimless cursing. I don't know if Micah's doing bits about getting pegged or something. Yeah, you're just like. Like, dude, dial it back. Yeah and they're just cursing aimlessly. That's true. Like it's just aimless cursing. When an open mic is doing like bits about like, you know, getting pegged or something. Yeah, you're just like. Dial it back.

Yeah, you're just like. Leave a little meat on the bone. You just started. You just opened up. I jizzed on Betty White's corpse. And you're like, wait, what? This is a bit about Uber. It's 745.

We still don't understand why you're jizzing on her corpse. It doesn't even make sense. Yeah, no, I remember we did uh joe mackinac we started we did a class at the comic strip and i remember he made us work clean and it was good for us and i remember asking him like well david tell is not clean he goes yeah but he could be yeah that was his rebuttal and he could he goes david tell david tell can work clean yeah can you not yet and i was like okay you gotta have i think that's great advice for like new for a new comic like if you get clean if you could kill for 15 minutes for clean you would work like pretty quickly yeah look at pretty quickly yeah you will work yeah yeah i mean

what seinfeld calls you better have that clean shit yeah yeah now i do like i'll do like corporates and stuff it's like because like when i did the when i did fallon the first time i wore a suit when people weren't wearing suits but i i was like I want to wear a suit because I want to have this clip of me wearing a suit doing Fallon. And I feel like that's going to lead to more stuff. Good point. And then I did it, and then COVID hit. And then the whole George Floyd thing happened. So it was like a cultural revolution.

I didn't hear about this. So every business was like, all right, we got to get a black guy now. And then i had this tonight show set of me in a suit so they were like this is him this one is safe yeah this is the safe one we want so i got so much work after that so much work i was doing corporates i was doing like honestly like when when covid like in september i was doing like three a week wow i was gonna be like i got an ad for men's warehouse i was fucking killing the corporate game i did a corporate for pfizer wow you got an early vax yeah no you know what's funny like my agents were negotiating this is like

after the vaccine came out like you know your agents are negotiating and my agents they just sent me the email of like the pfizer guy saying like uh our budget is kind of tight this year and we're like how many vaccines did you sell the Pfizer guy saying like, our budget is kind of tight this year. And we're like, how many vaccines did you sell? Everyone's looking for a discount though. You're throwing out, you're really jabbing me here.

I can use a booster. Jesus Christ. Ian Lara, everybody. Ian Lara, specials on HBO. You got a ton of, give us some tour dates coming up. Yeah, I'm in i'm in a bridgeport uh i've been doing the the stress factory in uh two weeks i'm in chicago in september doing zany's nice springfield mass uh seattle san diego doing a comedy store in san diego oh you're gonna

fucking love it doing laugh boston at the end of the year. Nice. Detroit, Houston at the Riot, Wesley Chapel, the whole thing, Wilmington. Go to the website. What's the website? Go see IanLaraLive.com. We didn't even get to do bids. Ian Lara Live. Oh, shit. You're right.

It flew by. All right. Well, yeah. HBO special, Comedy Central special. Check out his YouTube. It's all up there. And he posts clips. He's on Instagram, the whole.

Doing my best. Yeah, we got Montreal, Ian Lara opening. Oh, yeah, for sure. Hey! Yeah, Providence, Northampton, Burlington, Albany, Bethlehem, York, Toronto, Chicago Theater, motherfuckers, Phoenix, Cleveland, Columbus, Cincinnati, Indianapolis, Pittsburghburgh a ton of shit see on the road samuel.com slash shows hell yeah get some bodega cat and uh i'll be on the road as

well big european tour coming i'm going to england scotland uh fucking copenhagen uh but before that i'm in nashville i'm in the hamptons i'm in uh i'm doing that phantom power i'm trying to run this new hour but then it's a big theater tour uh you don't say it's uh it's all up on the site i'm coming to la san diego uh fucking i can't remember if houston all all the all the big ones all the fun cities so check it check it out. What's the name of the tour? You don't say. I love it. Yeah. Louisville, whatever it is, it's all on the website.

And, yeah, check out our specials. Everything's on YouTube. Yeah, and one quick thing. I'll say it afterwards, but, yeah, you guys, we love you guys. Beer Jew, Peters, BodegaCatWhiskey.com. Do you have a plug? Yeah, I actually have a bigger plug coming out. Next month, we're going to be coming out with the We Might Be Drunk cocktail recipe book.

Oh, the cocktail book. So everything that has been, like, all the most popular cocktails, obviously the Pear Plain with a lot of the other classics, and also all Beer Jew originals, including all the three old fashions today, will be in the book oh great these were stellar so keep an eye out and it'll be like a nice cocktail book and also you can drink along with us beautiful all right great what were you gonna say you guys the best we love you Sunday's the day for my next bender. I've made a fever wreck, you know the beer juice close.

I've had a little too much bourbon. And Norman's talking shit about the fucking pump. And I get down in the same way. Up on the roof like the cops are coming. And naked Samuel is feeling dangerous. I'm out to lunch here in New Orleans. We might be true.