We Might Be Drunk - Ep 150: Todd Barry

Episode Date: October 23, 2023

Todd Barry, it's Todd Barry! Legend with a new special out now on YouTube, Domestic Shorthair. He joins us to talk about his early Conan and Letterman spots. Peeves, some bits and Matt's cat and Winnie get into it a little. Everybody is fine. Todd Barry: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UKuoreiI0a0 Mark Normand: https://marknormandcomedy.com/ Sam Morril: https://www.sammorril.com/ Grab some tickets to the upcoming November 4th Theater at Madison Square Garden with Sam Morril. Tickets will sell out, so don't wait to grab yours now! Link Below: https://www.ticketmaster.com/event/3B005EDAE0D21883 Support the show and get up to 40% when you head to https://www.shopbeam.com/DRUNK and use code DRUNK Support the show and get up to 40% off some sweet new metal art with the code DRUNK at https://displate.com/wmbd?art=6247414ceddb3 Shop: https://www.wemightbedrunkpod.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/wemightbedrunkpod Bodega Cat: http://www.bodegacatspirits.com | We Might Be Drunk is produced, recorded and edited by Gotham Production Studios. Head producer: Matthew Peters https://www.gothamproductionstudios.com/ If you want to start a podcast contact [e-mail] for a discount on services when referred by WMBD!

Hey, here we are. We might be drunk. Todd had one drink last night, so we're going to take it easy on him. Do you have a red wine? Get a mic in front of you, Todd. Oh, yeah. Good call. I forgot about microphones. I had a Lambrusco, man. Yeah. By myself.

You had one drink? One little drink, yeah. Ohusco, man. Yeah. By myself. You had one drink? One little drink, yeah. Oh, easy. A beer? A Lambrusco, like it's a cold, bubbly red wine. Oh. Never heard of it. It's really good.

Lambrusco. Can we look that up? Pull it up. I would call it easy drinking. I'm not a big drinker, but if I was. Wow, Lambrusco. I'll check that out because I like a bubbly wine. Yeah, it's bubbly.

It's red. It's cold. It's kind of like everything. Okay, I'm in. Lambrusco. Yeah, it goes down easy. Are you still in the East Village? Hey, don't worry about it.

Oh, sorry, sorry. No, I'm in. I'm kind of a little, I'm on the cusp of the East Village. I know what you're talking. Same building. No, I moved in April 1st. I moved. We're neighbors.

Yeah, we're neighbors. Oh, okay. I went to his coffee. Even if you live close in New York, there's 900 coffee shops in that area. That's true. So I tried out his coffee shop. It's solid. It was good, right?

Good coffee shop taste, Todd. Yeah, man. That's where I did Comedians in Cars. That coffee shop? Oh, wow. That's the second coffee shop that I. Nice. Probably goes down as the worst dip.

You know, probably right. I mean. Why is that? Well, just because. I can't believe I just took that leg without it. I've seen them all 900 times. But you guys, I feel like it just didn't click or he was trying to make a joke out of how it didn't click.

That's what I think he was doing. Yeah. I mean, it's just thing with that. I mean, I didn't know we're going to talk about this but i that's the beauty of a pod yeah i mean people the problem is that some people don't understand editing so that's like he could have made me look like i was the chatterbox true shut the fuck up good point or that i didn't talk and he just went for it i know it's fine i don't i guess he must have liked the episode episode or else he would have scrapped it but yeah yeah but yeah I think there's worse episodes by the way I mean I definitely am I mean I just feel like with him like

Leno's his guest well they they've been to a diner 600 times together yeah I mean maybe more Larry David and Jerry created a show yeah yeah so yeah. So there's going to be like a rapport, a comfort. And with me, I'd known him for decades just to say hi to him, but I've never had like a long conversation. I never hung out with him.

That's the tricky thing about podcasts is like Mark and I have like this rapport for so many years, but sometimes we'll go on someone else's pod and they just go down a road

that we're like, what the fuck? Totally. And you've never, this is the first conversation you've ever had and now it's public yeah into a microphone it is like it almost is like a first date that's broadcast yes weird yeah but you're trying to be really funny and plug dates other dates yeah um how how cool are you with jerry oh i'm fine i'm oh yeah i mean i don't

clearly he's a big fan of yours yeah i mean, I have the phone message somewhere where he called me. Because he somehow got my number. And I was just like a frozen yogurt shop. And this call comes through and I didn't take it. And then I check. I was like, hi, Todd, this is Jerry Seinfeld. You know, Todd, when I was on the Tonight Show, this guy called me and said, you want to do the show?

And I said, yeah. He goes goes this is kind of like that call something something along that line but it's like a minute and a half message wow wow yeah i mean i do wish that i was um i wish i would have cut loose a little bit more but also i you know for 14 minutes out of four hours you could have showed me talking more i mean that's also also it's his show so he's free to share it's also weird to compare your show to the tonight show in the 80s oh it's like the peak of television yeah yeah it's good point i mean i love the show it's just a weird comp yeah and

you know he took gaffer you see gaffigans gaffigan says right a bunch of goes you say right a lot and the rest of the episode is him going right right right it's a montage so you're like yeah you can edit anything yeah I mean I think whoa hey we got a cat fight and a dog fight here this is

turning to we might be a zoo okay we don't play that shit yeah New Orleans actually this made me feel good at what's that place Cushon Cushon Cushon Bush by myself years ago and this this waitress play that shit. I was in New Orleans, actually. This made me feel good. What was that place? Cauchon? Cauchon.

Cauchon Boucher. I was eating by myself a few years ago and this waitress from across the restaurant made a bee lunch. She goes, your episode's my favorite episode.

There we go. Wow, that fucking made me feel good. Damn. A lot of drinking in that time. Plus one for you. Yeah. There you go.

Yeah, I saw Nate Bergazzi had lunch with Seinfeld and I wrote on there, I didn't know we were allowed to get a pic. I had lunch with him, too, but I didn't want to ask for a photo. Oh, you used to be hanging with him.

Yeah, I was trying to be cool. We text. Yeah. It is tough to get a pic, because I've done it. It definitely ruins the vibe a little bit. To get a pic with, yeah. Well, you want the pic for the memory.

Yes. But then once you ask for the pic, of course, the show off and the memory. But like there is something about just playing it cool. Yeah, I mean, of course. Them looking to you as more of a peer than. Yeah, yeah. Exactly.

I was at a restaurant and I went on like a hinge date like three years ago. And it was fine. And then I went to eat by myself at Little Frankie's. You know that? Oh, yeah. That's a great spot. Where you can eat at like 4 a.m. And I'm sitting there, and I kind of look behind me,

and I'm like, oh, it's Adam Sandler. Whoa. So then he was eating. He'd just done an event with the movie. It was Uncut Gems, so he was like the whole cast, directors, and everything was sitting there. And I said, hey. And he goes, I go, yeah, I don't remember.

You hosted Letterman once when I was don't remember you hosted letterman once when i was on it like he hosted letterman once when i was on it so sandler was the guest host for a lot of yeah yeah yeah wow and he remembered that yeah and he goes oh yeah no you know but it was just but it was the thing we're like part of me wanted to just get oh i should grab a picture i know but then you're like it's kind of it's like you said it's cool to just be like hey you're a comic i'm a comic and uh nice seeing you and let's i got a good pick with sandler do you that was a good pick he does seem like he's pretty friendly about pig he's pretty cool um he gets he just was like we were we were doing gigs together i'm going back out with him this weekend i'm pretty pumped uh there you go

but we uh yeah i definitely was like can i can i snap a picture of us and he goes yeah yeah i just he was the reason i don't post is because i like people to think, like to not know who's on the show because it's like Sandler and Friends. Right. So he likes it to be a surprise because like, look, sometimes it's me, but then sometimes you get like Chris Rock popping up. Right, right. Sometimes you get like, you know, Spade or whoever. But I get that. But yeah, he's the nicest dude.

Yeah, he was really nice. And he came, like he, at the restaurant, he like, we talked for a while was really nice and he came like he at the restaurant he like we talked for a while and then later he came over and started talking just asked me about a tell and oh nice yeah he loves a telling quinn like so much he loves new york comedy and he and he uh and he talked about i remember because i did the letterman thing like on netflix the letterman sit down thing and he was like letterman he messaged me he's like isn't he the king like it's so cool that he just like he loves comedy yeah i love to hear when i open for seinfeld luckily his bodyguard guy is there and he snapped a photo so i got one of me and jerry at a restaurant but i would love that lunch photo

that nate got can you pull that up matt it's a hell of a pick nate bargazzi i saw it ah we went to the same place i feel cheated cheated on. Where was it? Brooklyn Diner in Midtown. Oh, I used to go there. He's got his own booth. I remember I walked in and these two Mexican guys, I was like, hey, I'm here to meet. And they're like, we know. Right here, sir.

I got there like a half hour early. Matt, don't pull up Mia Khalifa videos. What are you doing? There we go. Look at that. Boom. Oh, restaurant same booth he wore the same outfit for me very happy to take that picture it's nice when they look equally happy because it's always weird when you have a shit-eating grin and they're just like they're like you know just yeah like all right totally well jimmy Fallon commented three times. Go relax, Jimbo. Take a breather.

Go host your show. I can text you my comment. Hey, look at that. I didn't know we were allowed to get a pic. All right, all right. Now we're reading comments. So you guys are tight still, you and Seinfeld? Yeah, we text, but I'd love to get to a nice, steady, consistent lunch.

Yeah, I almost asked them to do a redo. Oh, wow. And I also almost texted them about my new special, like, just to see, like... But I don't want to be, like, exploiting it. Well, your new special's out now on YouTube, All Things Comedy. Yeah, yeah.

Dude, I mean, you're one of the best joke writers. Oh, thank you. Really, every joke is just, like... Oh, thank you so dry and hilarious and perfect yes yeah the special was like it's like pizza we were like i'll have one and then he ate the whole pie really yeah it's so funny couldn't turn it off wow that's nice man joe what room was that was that the den in chicago oh the den the den play over here did his special yeah yeah nice good room i'm glad you went the youtube route because like people sometimes people Oh, the den. The den. The player over here did his special. Yeah. Yeah. Nice. Good room.

I'm glad you went the YouTube route because, like, people, sometimes people don't want to do it, but, like, you need people to see this. It's hilarious. Yeah. I mean, I did try to go the Netflix route and the HBO route, and I can name everyone who passed, buddy. But there is something where, like, you can sort of monitor. Like, Netflix, at least at my level, wouldn't give me any numbers.

Totally. It's doing good. On your way. Yeah. But you'll get more views on YouTube than HBO. Yeah. I'm calling it right now. Oh, yeah.

No question. I don't think they push it on HBO. No. I mean, I miss the old days where you got a nice check for doing a special. I mean, for me, anyway. Sure. But this is a different kind of it's like and also i was kind of tired of most of those jokes anyway so there you go i'll get rid of them

as bill burr said a special is just a commercial for the road yeah you know come see me buy a ticket look what i can do right how's the new stuff it's slow man slow going same i just like you know the way it is you get something you. You're like, oh, this works. And you feel like, oh, I got work done. And you're like, I have a new 22 seconds of material. Yes, exactly. You get one new line out of a weekend. And I'm like taking a week off.

You know, like, I'm good, man. I'm on the roll. That's what Gary Veeder said. We were on the road over the weekend. And he's like, I got three new bits this week. And he's like, and that'll total 52 seconds. Exactly. It's just, but I i mean that's how it starts but i also want to try this thing like i don't always do where i just expand every joke i already have like the ones i think oh this is a really solid new joke just how many other angles can i hit it at because if you add like

15 20 seconds to each joke oh yeah that adds up i saw gallman once at the cellar and uh he was doing an old old bit i'm a huge fan from his first album i was like wow that's an oldie he goes it's not done i was like jesus christ this guy's uh meticulous you gotta yeah you gotta just tag it up sometimes i'll have a bit i have so many like two-thirds bits you know like it's like right there but it's not it's not good enough to put in something but right um this is the first time i've like taken my time ever with putting a special out so i'm not gonna tape for till march but uh i like how that's time for him it's like a year and a half no it's like my seventh special in six years i know but i really was like i was like hustling

to get the other ones like out just out of fear. Like people coming out on the road. But now it's like I feel like I can take a breath a little bit. And it's better for the comedy. But I am still on the road every week. So I am sick of a lot of these jokes. Yeah. I mean, that is the.

I almost feel like I know what they're done when I'm sick of them. Interesting. I mean, that's maybe a little dramatic. But I just feel like sometimes you're like, yeah, I can recite this one inside and out. But I do hate when I tell a joke and I'm like, what am I talking about? I don't even know what I'm saying right now. Oh, yeah. It's kind of autopilot.

I mean, generally I do. I'm pretty engaged in the show, but there are times where you're just like, you're so locked into the way of your say something. Yes. And you're thinking about a restaurant you're going to later, and then you're like, oh, wait, I'm in the middle of this bit about cats. Yeah. Yeah, there you go. Yeah, I saw the special.

Do you, I mean, do you write differently now than you did when you were starting out? I mean, when I did my first open mic night in 1987, I mean, I wrote it out, like, handwritten. Same here. And memorized it. And I'm kind of glad I did that wrote it out, like handwritten. Same here. And memorized it. And I'm kind of glad I did that because it was, you know, it was like a real sort of a, my first ever set and it was kind of professional looking. Like I wasn't like, oh, what else?

You know, like looking at a notepad or just being, I mean, I seem like, I feel like I did the prep that other other people didn't do but i did the same i mean every you know every so often i'm like i'm gonna sit down and i'm gonna become a i'm gonna treat this like a day job and work for two hours a day it's just two hours a day writing and then just kind of like i just i'm all over them like you know i have an appointment with an adhd doctor tomorrow so what really yeah i think because you have trouble focusing yeah i can't focus i mean I have an appointment with an ADHD doctor tomorrow. What? Really? Yeah, I think so. Because you have trouble focusing. Yeah, I can't focus. What, are you kidding?

I can focus on stage, almost laser focus. But as far as like sitting, I mean, but maybe it's just like. You've gone so far. Yeah, I've done very well. Yeah, I mean, you don't need it now. No, I feel, I relate to that. My ADD is terrible. I just want to be able to clean my apartment or something.

Well, that's just lazy. I mean, I hire people to clean it. Sounds like you're good, though. Yeah. That's fascinating. ADHD, it's always for kids. I'm also diagnosed myself. I'll let you know tomorrow what happened.

Isn't it when people diagnose themselves? I was talking to a guy. I was doing crowd work over the weekend, and this guy was like, I have sexomnia, and I was like, what the hell is that it's like when it's like when i'm asleep but i try to have sex like sleepwalking but you try to have sex with the person which i was like i don't know if that's i don't know if that's a thing but then i looked up it is a thing really then i asked him have you seen a doctor he said no i'm like so you're just diagnosing yourself wow it's a weird thing to just be like i have it yeah well other people have told him i guess i guess yeah i guess i guess it's hard for a doctor to pick that one out yeah

unless you doze off all right he's got a reverse cosby he sleeps and then they could be asleep that could be half a cause that's good point half a cause yeah yeah but i mean we do diagnose i mean i definitely my parents sent me to an ADD thing when I was a kid, and it was called like a challenge or something, and it was seven hours. Mental challenge. That's what it was called. It was seven hours, though, and it's like that's cruel. Seven hours.

That's cruel to do to a child with ADD. That's crazy. You're like, I can't focus. This is not. Of course. It's not like you walk out of there and you're like, I'm cured. You're like, no, that was fucking painful. Seven hours.

I listened to a book on tape on ADHD, or audio book. I don't guess I'm going to call them books on tape. While you're like i'm cured you're like that was fucking painful seven hours book on tape on aghd and uh or our audio book i don't guess i'm calling books while you're scrolling on instagram yeah and then just even that you're like there's chapters like how do you expect me to get through this chapter even listening to it when it's about not being able to focus and you're like in these minor details it's a good point you need treats like being an animal they need like yes treats right like a little do you treat yourself like if you let's say you do a great show or something like oh yeah or get something finished a little cocktail a good drink good meal a couple cookies yeah yeah yeah they got to do it but i can't imagine you sedated really well you couldn't i'm already boring is that what you're saying well i, I'm just saying you're a low-key guy.

If you were sedated, you'd disappear. But what do you mean sedated? Well, like if you take ADHD, you'll be the opposite of sedated. No, I think it focuses you. Oh, it brings you up. It's like uppers, yeah. If I take like an ADD med, like a Concerta or something, I can bang out. I should take it more.

I can bang out so should take it more i can bang so many jokes use the medication i've taken it before i i don't have that many so i use it very you know yeah that's kind of what i want from this doctor is just like something where like right now i feel like i want to be focused not like every day three sure it's like roids i mean it's literally it's like it's like steroids and baseball like we're kind of cheating a little bit by taking it but also a lot of people don't have this. But I feel like if you do have it, it would still help. I've heard people say the opposite, but I think it just focuses.

I think ADHD helps us do what we need to do. I mean, we're benefiting from it. Because our mind wanders. Yeah, our mind wanders. It also pinpoints stuff quicker than other people. But it also hurts us. Yeah, yeah. I mean, it's a double-edged sword.

I saw you when I was a young comic. I remember seeing Todd in a Starbucks writing, and I was writing. That wasn't me. That definitely wasn't me. First Starbucks, new. Second writing, new. It was definitely, maybe it was a-

It could have been a Starbucks. There was a time I used to go to Starbucks. But I mean, I remember just going there and seeing you and being like, oh shit, Todd's like, you know- He's working. That's what you want to see out of the comics you like. Is that they're still putting in the work. Right.

Oh, I love that. Yeah, it's weird. You're from Florida. I mean, I was born in New York. Oh, I didn't know that. I started comedy in Florida. I lived in Florida for like 15 years. Wow.

Is that hell? I mean, who knows? It's like the formative year, so it probably would have been hell anywhere. True. True. When you're a young, shy guy. It's like the formative year, so it probably would have been hell anywhere. True, true. When you're a young, shy guy. Florida's got an interesting alumni. It's like Bert Kreischer.

Oh, is he from Florida? Tosh. Yeah, he's Tampa. Regan. Regan, Carrot Top. I started with Carrot Top and Larry the Cable Guy. Are you still friendly with them? No.

I mean, I'm not feuding with them, but I just don't. Yeah, I don't. I mean mean i'm sure i could get in touch with either of them i heard someone won shit on carrot top and you were like who else you kind of defended him and i really and i liked it i like that you i was like all right like i just like contrarian takes sure and it's like it became hip to shit on Carrot Top. Yeah, he's just like, oh, well, like I saw some TikTok video today, actually, got the worst comics ever. There's the five, and I'm not going to mention their names, but it was like, this is a list from 2008. Right. Like, just who you could guess have been like, it's just, I don't know.

It's just like, especially like Carrot Top. Comedy lists are annoying, good or bad. Yeah, 100%. But bad, especially when it's like an amateur take it when i hear you know when i like overhear open mic or shitting on pros even as an open mic or it bothered me oh yeah i've had i've had that where you like your opening act is shitting on the mc it's like i don't know either you guys right i don't want to hear this it's awkward i don't want you to like it's like you're not ingratiating yourself with me right shitty to a guy who's on the show with us yeah i think it's

kind of a young comic thing though they're so insecure they're so new that they have to feel better by shitting on everyone else and you do need to blow off steam but it still bugged me a little bit oh yeah and we did it but it still bugged me i mean bit. Oh, yeah. And we did it, but it still bugged me. I mean, I always feel like there's shit. I mean, I definitely can shit talk. And if these mics are off and that guy left and the cat left. No, don't leave. The cat can stay. I would, you know, then, you know, sitting upstairs at the cellar.

You're like, what the fuck? That should be the podcast. It's just the mics off. That's the name of the podcast. That would blow up. And you're like, you know who fucking sucks? Yeah. That's the whole episode. I mean, I definitely do plenty of that. and you're like you know who fucking sucks yeah that's the whole

episode I mean I definitely I can do plenty of that and I can't wait to do it once this show's over

from this very seat well I was at skank fest not bragging but Ari of course had this great idea

at the end to do a show no phones couple comics on stage behind a table and the audience yells out a comic

and they have to trash them but like real trashing not like oh matt rife's annoying it was like real shit and it got ugly i mean it was too real really i mean i was i was in the crowd just glued to my seat it was fucking entertaining as hell but they were saying stuff where you're like you know these guys people the audience just remember this and then tweet it or whatever yeah i love our i don't love that it was wild i don't love the idea of like also it feels a little bit like turn cody to me like it should be i don't know there should be our thing yeah i remember hearing stanhope once say like someone went up to

him and uh and shit on dane cook to him and he goes i like dane better than you and i do kind of like i have no problem with the audience member but i don't like when they try to ingratiate themselves by shitting on a peer of ours i don't yeah i've had that happen or they'll even do it like you do a show it's like a showcase show and they're like that's the guy before he wasn't good oh my friend i know yeah i've known for 22 years yeah you wasn't good. Oh, my friend? I know. Yeah. You've known him for 22 years? Yeah. You didn't like him? Right.

I mean, I guess they're trying to make it sound like you stood out, but you could say that in a way without. What was the deal with the guy before you? I don't know. Yeah. I guess you didn't like him. That's fine. I could have been that guy,

and I've been that guy to a million people. People have a weird instinct to rate everything. I watch people come out of the comedy so they go the third guy was great he was the best one second guy sucked third guy competition shows play well that's why they always try to make us compete people want to pick a winner yes they really do this is entertainment this isn't a sport right yeah and it's subjective like you might relate more to this lady because you're a lady and and then you might relate more, you know. People pick their guy or their gal. How was Larry the Cable Guy out of the game?

What was that like? He actually drove me to, I think, one of my first paid gigs. Wow. Camaro or Firebird to Ron Bennington's club. Wow. Yeah, Ron Bennington saw my first ever appearance as a comic. Dan Whitney. And Dan Whitney, yeah, we were on the open mic scene.

And then I guess after I left Florida, he used to call into this radio station, he's Larry the Campbell guy, and the rest is history. Yeah. How about that? I feel like there's comedy for everyone like this. It might not be, you know, there's people like we're going back to Carrot Top. I was like, he's doing a goofy show that's kind of fun i probably i would like i would love to see it i'd probably love every second of it and just like he's not pretending he's you know political

he's just right making you laugh yeah yeah and he's a nice guy i think the bitterness comes to when people who think that they should be further than him but sure what they fail to realize is he's doing a different thing it's a different he's in vegas yes move to vegas exactly you know what i mean like i sure as fuck wouldn't want to live there no go crazy god no yeah that residency but i think there's also that thing that people who are like they go to more than 10 comedy shows and they're like i have a different level of yeah you know i go i get get it. I remember there was a guy in Melbourne during the festival who, in the comments section, started basically a review column within the comments. Oh, boy.

I go to a lot of shows, and you could have terrible taste and go to a lot of shows. Yeah. Also. You could go to a lot of shitty shows because you have bad taste. Also, there could be hacky comics. There's also hacky takes like, oh, Dane Cook sucks. And you're like, have you ever listened? You just heard someone else say that.

Yeah. You know? But that's the cool, he was the cool guy to hate for a while. That's the thing. When you become incredibly successful, it becomes a cool thing to shit on a person. But like, they had, love him or hate him, they have something to get to that level. Yes. And also, did you work as hard as that person nope dane on you know the stand-up and the business end undeniably worked hard oh yeah

myspace baby yeah i forgot about myspace old school so you like i remember back in the day you do panel on conan all the time how many of those did you do i mean i think i did conan i mean i hate to know i do know. I think it was 18 times. Woo! That's crazy. That's stand-up and panels. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

I miss doing Conan. God. Oh, Conan was the number one. That was just like, I really like, I felt, you feel like you're in show business, you know? Like, it's fun doing these clubs and everything, but then you just like, your car's coming at 543,, 5.45. You're going to be in the dressing room next to Martha Stewart.

Who are some of the craziest guests you were on with? Martha Stewart was right next to me. What's the guy? Did you talk to her? No, I didn't talk to her. Val Kilmer. Wow. Who's the guy?

Val Kilmer rules. Not Bruce Stern. Who's the other guy? Fuck. Daniel Stern? No, he's older.. Not Bruce Stern. Who's the other guy? Fuck. Daniel Stern? No, he's older. Howard Stern. Shit.

Donald Sutherland. Oh, another legend. He was on. But then I remember Al Roker was on once, and he made a beeline to say hi to me. He's like, oh, hi. He was just saying, who's the other guest? He was just going to a cheese plate. He was just being like, this is a sweetheart.

Yeah. But yeah, and I remember, yeah. Weren't you on with Bourdain on one of them? I was on Seth Meyers' show with Bourdain. Oh, that's a good one. You talked to him, right? It's weird because I. Did you get the photo?

No. No. He, I saw that he followed me on Twitter like a few years prior to that. And then I. But you never wrote to him. I think I was on a flight with him from Austin. And then I sent him a direct message inviting him to my shows. And he thanked me.

He said, I don't know if I can make that. Then I sent him like my special. He's like, oh, yeah, I'll check it out. Thanks. And then I mean, it sounds like this is like three direct messages in like eight years. So it wasn't like I wasn't hounding him. And that's why he ended it. These messages, I can't take it. But then I said i said hey we're on seth meyer show together and he goes oh i can't wait and then he kind of just came in dressing room said hi

and then left like there was no conversation he was nice but i've heard he's very he was very shy actually six five i heard yeah he's yeah he was he was the best. Yeah, he was cool. Oh, yeah. Cool guy. Cool gig. That was pretty devastating. I got to ask you about this. Uh-oh. So you called in the letterman. He called me. Wait.

You got to pull this up there, Peters. You got to pull this up. It's on YouTube. Put Todd Berry. I don't think this gets enough, even though I promoted the hell out of this. I came across this on accident, and I was like, why is this not a thing? Yeah, there it is. Yeah, I remember this.

That can't be 1982, can it? Yeah. What? From someone named Todd Raz. I'm guessing that's just a nickname. His last name is Barry from Tamarack, Florida. Here's the situation. I do an unbelievable impression of Paul Schaefer.

Here are the options. A, fly me to New York, pay for everything, and I'll do the impression on your show. Yeah, right. Or call me and I'll do the impression on your show. Yeah, right. Or call me, and I'll do it over the phone. So go ahead, Dave, pick either A or B. Either way, I'm sure it will turn out to be a real nifty gig. It was a tough choice, Todd, but I've selected option B.

Let's call this a day. This is amazing. Were you shitting bricks? Yeah, I kind of was. And they call it to say we're doing yeah yeah but that's it I mean correctly Wow this is late night in the 80s this is huge yeah okay Todd Berry apparently a man with a lot of time on his hands. Doing soon an impression of our own musical director, Mr. Paul Schaefer. We're waiting for that first... Hello?

Well, hello, Todd. How are you? Is this Todd? Yes. My name is David Letterman. I'm calling from New York City. How are you, sir? I'm all right. Where are you now, Todd? I'm in Florida. Uh-huh. Killing!

What were you, 11? Sounds just like Paul, doesn't it? What particular city, Todd? It's Tamarack. Tamarack, and is it near a larger community? It's near Fort Lauderdale. Oh, well, that gives us generally an idea. It's a nice area of the country there.

I noticed, Todd, the phone didn't ring, and you just picked it up. Did it ring there? Yeah, that's the way that thing works. Oh! That's the way that thing works. Oh! That's the way they work. That's great. You're singing with the king. I can't believe I said that.

Gee, Todd, I'd love to go on talking with you, but I understand you do an impression of Mr. Paul Schaefer. This is where it gets bad. It's unreal, Dave. Okay. It's unreal, Dave. Yeah, Dave. Yeah, Dave. It's unreal, Dave. I mean, it's cuckoo groovy, Dave. I mean, I'm peaking right now, Dave. okay okay thank you very nice Todd thank you Wow

I mean we didn't get there was a follow-up with you oh really did you ever mention this to me you do the show I tried to I just never really asserted it but I didn't try hard enough to tell him about it but this is two years later you very much it's getting very close to the gala gala second anniversary of my appearance on your show that's right Mayth, 1982 was the day I blessed your viewer mail segment with my Paul Schaefer impression. Here are your options. A, fly me to New York and pay for everything, or B, call me and we'll celebrate by phone. So go ahead, Dave, pick A or B.

Either way, I'm sure it will turn out to be the ultimate in keen your friend for life todd barry tamarack florida uh well todd thank you very much for the letter and uh i'm sorry to say that if your choices are only a and b then i'm not really sure there's anything we can do oh wait a minute excuse me just a minute c just forget about me i've already got more than i deserve oh okay fine thank you C, just forget about me. I've already gotten more than I deserve. Oh, okay. Fine, Colin. Thank you. Wow. That would keep me going for 10 years.

Dear Dave. All right. Wow. That is pretty great. Yeah. You got a good zing on him. I did. I can't believe I did that.

I just kind of just. And also, it's just weird because he didn't hear the phone ring, but it did ring. So that's, I guess it's. I thought I heard it ring too. Yeah, it did. I could hear it. Wow. That is an 18-year-old.

I would be running around the house in excitement. I mean, fucking, I hate to reveal my age, but it's over 40 years ago. Ah, that was a different time. I'm 40, approximately 40 years ago. Jesus. That's insane. It's all over for me, man. Also, your Comedy Central half hour. Which one? You did two of them years ago. Jesus. That's insane. It's all over for me, man. Also, your Comedy Central half hour.

Which one? You did two of them, yeah. Oh. I still remember the joke. You say the opening joke. I know what you guys are thinking. The watch joke. Oh, yeah, yeah.

How's it go again? What was it saying? You say it like, oh, Todd, this is your second Comedy Central special, but you're wearing the same watch. Yeah. And you go, well, I'll tell you what's new five of the next 30 minutes you're gonna see such a great way to open a special oh yeah yeah that was fun those were you old albums man i mean we used to listen to medium energy yeah falling off the bone medium energy like that was when

albums like to me i love consuming comedy that way i I mean, taking a walk. My album comes out this Thursday, actually. The album version of my special. Nice. There you go. I think Todd is like perfect. Certain comics with just killer jokes are perfect for that medium where you have like a guy like Todd or Dave Attell or Hedberg.

Yes. Jokes like that where you're just like, this is a perfect thing to listen to in a car on the walk because they're just hard jokes 100 and then they go into your brain better when you just listen you know you're walking it i feel like you connect with it more you hear the last almost i think i'd almost rather watch listen to an album of that's what i'm saying then i don't know that's how i got into it really it's like it's like albums like you or like you know grok or all those people we talked about that's how we watched them right oh yeah well rock i was hbo and carlin a lot of hbo but but his stuff worked well audio too that's true voice and his jokes i mean that's true it

worked it translated too i think yeah i would just put them on like the way you put on a podcast in the house and clean or whatever loved them i used to throw on like early years like you forget how to write you forget how to write a bit and you're like let me just listen to bits for a while like hear like other people's and then you were like oh yeah that's how i write jokes you know but like uh you you could throw on pandora and you get like so many different comic voices yeah it's interesting to hear what people can get away with yeah like oh they that they got away with like i saw doug stanhope at caroline's on mother's day open with a joke about his mother's suicide wow it was like at caroline's

which is very touristy so it wasn't all his diehard fans it was just like man you can do you can do that that's an incredible bit where he talks it's a great suicide yeah assisted suicide great bit yeah he he is like they throw around the word fearless and comedy a lot but like doug is like truly well he'll say oh yeah that is pretty incredible and he doesn't really get like attacked for saying anything you know problematic but he's also the last guy who would stop himself from saying something that's true yeah i don't think they would ever expect an apology from him i think right he goes in it people that are kind of like dip their toe in that get in trouble I think Doug is so unapologetic yeah yeah yeah kind of lives outside the system exactly yeah so they're gonna like

not allow him to live in like some outskirt of Arizona but it's like yelling at a hobo like hey that was inappropriate he's like what are you gonna do yeah I got I got nothing going on not that Doug has nothing going on but he gets away with it i think with i think the drugs and alcohol help where he's just kind of like this dude who's as you said outside the system oh yeah and showing up you know he's had a few already and uh yeah i mean i remember listening he's another dude whose albums i would listen to oh great i'll just be like holy shit this dude just goes for it no refund refunds. It's amazing. And what's the one?

Something to take the edge off? Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, all those deadbeat heroes. Yeah, he's one of the few guys who I would actually, when he came to New York, I would go watch him. Really? Yeah, and sit there. I mean, guest list.

But let's not be crazy. I didn't fucking throw down for it. Atel says he's his favorite comic. Yeah, he's great. I saw Atel at Caroline's, doug was in the back watch it no wait doug was on stage of carolines david tell walked in and doug stopped mid bit and goes dave what are you doing here he goes i heard a white voice coming out of carolines i had to see who it was and that killed damn well who were guys like early on because i know you were were, you know, like a 90s New York guy, like a great generation of comics. Were there dudes that you would sit down and write bits, like bounce bits with in the diner ever?

No, I mean, I didn't. I never. I've done that occasionally with people. I think I've even done with you. But I've never had like every Monday we meet at this diner. So New Yorkork not really i mean a little i've done it a little with joe zimmerman um new special special funny guy hey it's not about him right now yeah he's very funny um but i haven't yeah i mean i guess i've gotten

tags and stuff from people who happen to be watching but yeah i haven't done a lot i know there's stuff people all bounce shit off of on the phone but i generally just do it myself yeah but i do think there's definitely like i would want to do more just like meeting up and bouncing bits because i think it is helpful oh yeah and it's not like having someone to write for you but it just gets you talking it out yeah someone who knows and reading their face just like delivering it to a person reading their face and kind of being like huh okay where am i going right here where am i going yeah yeah am i missing something obvious yeah i don't i don't expect someone else to do my act i want to write my jokes yeah sure um even saying it out loud to a person helps it kind of makes you hear how it sounds i always think i'm gonna you know i sometimes go

well i were i write on stage that's what what I tell people mainly when they ask about my writing, which is true. But I also feel like. You write on stage? Yeah. Oh. Really? You feel very page to stage. No, definitely.

No, definitely write on stage. That's so weird. I would never guess that about you. Really? Yeah. So you thought like all those, my epic bits were like. Yeah, of course. That was typing.

No, I of course thought. Oh, really? No, no. It's on stage. I think of bits and you're like, yeah, of course. No, I of course thought, really? No, no. It's on stage. I think the bits and you're like, okay,

so you have a bit like, uh, let me think of an example of like a Todd bit, like a classic Todd, like, uh, so a guy masturbating in front of an ATM machine. Yeah.

And he's like, you know, sure. There are times when I look at my checking account and I'm, there's a little more. Oh, that's great. And you want to celebrate. And you want to celebrate.

And you want to celebrate. Yeah. So you came up with that on the fly on stage? I don't remember. I mean, that was a while ago. I may have done more writing writing back then. But yeah, I mean, after a few tries. I mean, it's not like out of the gate they work.

But you just had a nugget. Yeah. You just kind of like, oh, and then you add this couple of words and then you do it again. And I mean, it takes forever. The wine takes forever the wine one the wine one what was so you have the wine bit in your new special about how the the bottle is the second yeah yeah most expensive yeah the second most expensive bottle or second cheapest bottle right is the one that they mark up the most right so like how like can you take us through the process of writing a joke like that? Well, I heard that somewhere. And it seemed to make sense that the most marked up bottle of wine on a restaurant's menu is the second cheapest because a guy will be on a date.

I'm doing the bit, basically. Yeah, do the bit. A guy will be on a date, doesn't want to buy the cheapest wine, so he picks the second cheapest and then gets destroyed. So then I just talked it through. And actually, Phil gave me one of the lines. I shouldn't credit Phil with anything comedy-wise. But, yeah, he kind of gave me one of the big laughs in it, actually. But, yeah, so I just talked it through.

And then eventually, once you get it into where it's like everything works, supposedly. Because there's times, I'm sure, you know where you like have a bit you're like oh totally it takes so long you're just like i gotta fix that a little part yes yes it's like yeah it's um so yeah just over repeating it over and over again is that you write your stuff out completely both you guys not completely if it's a story i can't if it's a story i kind of have to listen and just memorize but uh but there's still beats that i write down and so i'm like get to this line get to this line get like almost like like checkpoints in the story that i get to same but then for a bit i i'm pretty much uh i have word docs full of just yeah almost every joke written out word for word.

Yeah, they have bullet points. I definitely have bullet points. I have the bullet. And I will sometimes go, I'm going to just pretend I'm writing this like it's in the book. I'll write it out and I'll do that. But I've also had the reverse where like a TV shows, can you send us a transcript of your act or your set?

That's the worst. And then you do and you're like, I don't even know how to punctuate this. Yes. None of this seems funny. They're going to read this and hate it. I should say that, yeah, that annoys the shit out of me, even though I write most of the jokes down. Because for whatever reason, once it starts working, I just lose track of it, you know? But like, also it's hard to type it out in your.

Right. Yes, exactly. So I will type it to some degree, but then also a lot of the typing is also just the start and the finish. I just need to know where it ends up. But like I had a bit idea the other day, it's like a new idea, but true story. I got shit faced and I go home and I'm on,

I go on for whatever reason, like cancer charities are popping up like children's cancer. And I got so upset that I made, I made a pretty big donation. I was like, fuck cancer. I woke up the next day and I was i was like well that's a bit more than i would have you know which like it's a weird moment it's like you can't the angle at the end of the angle i'm like i think it's like you can't really call amex fraud department like some asshole stole my card

right and i guess he really wants a cure but like that's a bit that i don't think i could write that i needed to like say it yes because it's such a weird uh typing up a bit like that there's a cure but like that's a bit that i don't think i could write that i needed to like say it yes because it's such a weird uh typing up a bit like that there's a fine line between like you know it has to sound conversational too and that's i think the struggle for just writing bits but that bit is great too because you do you do uh philanthropy when you're drunk most guys do worse things you do better things because you're even like, I wouldn't have given this much. Yeah. But when you're drunk, you would. Have you done the thing

where you call the charity up and go, listen, I've got a little awkward situation. Look, I want to help, but not that much. $250. I'm fine with $250. $2,000.

I don't know. I was drunk. To me, if you have the premise and the ending, i feel a lot better going on stage really yeah the end the end line like a nice pop at the end to tie it all up yeah because then you can you can fish a little bit exactly you can kind of play with the middle and you know you have a like a parachute at the end it's like it's like you know when you're gonna get laid on a date you can kind of be yourself yes yes i heard pete holmes said he goes really dirty

when a joke is new because he's he's nervous so he's he can get the laughs there oh and then uh bill burr said when he's doing a new hour he kind of hacks it up a little just because he's like i gotta get through it it's not there yet see i think i don't always follow this but i think opening if you're doing a 10-minute set somewhere, 15 minutes, opening with the new stuff is a good thing to do. Ted said the same thing. Did he? Ted Alexandro, yeah. He stole that from me.

Yeah, I guess I just feel like you ride that wave of like being applauded. The applause comes on. You get, here's Mark. And then you just go. And if your first two things don't if they work then you got your other shit just locked and loaded right if they don't work then you just ease into the other stuff that works interesting i think it works when you have your audience i think if you're doing that coming up as a comic they might just turn on you yeah exactly i remember

hearing ted say that as a young comic and then doing that like the comic strip and they're like fuck this guy yeah yeah exactly there's always that thing though where you do a bunch of you know a stuff and then you try the new one and it's just such a huge drop oh yeah i mean i guess at that point you could go hey that one did work i mean we can get away with things other people who make mistakes if their job can't do but we can just go like that but yeah try to do it when you're air traffic controller. Is that someone's joke? I feel like that's someone's joke. That's pretty good. I don't know.

That's fun. But also, I hear what you're saying, especially I think if it's like a topical bit, it's great to open with because they're like, oh shit, he's writing. That's a new bit. Yeah. And you get a 20% boost, I think, on topical. You do a Taylor Swift joke or something, it's an extra bump or something like that. And if you do jokes about the town, first of all, they love that.

They're like, oh my God, he's telling us about our town. Even though the joke might be a eh, like a C, they're on board. I would notice opening for David Tell, whatever city he was in, he would praise them. He'd be like, Ann Arbor, Michigan, you guys know how to party. And I'd be like, yeah. That's manipulation. But you got to do that. You got to, like, because they feel when you're pumped to be there,

they're pumped to be there. Totally. You can't just walk up and be like, I was at the bank. You got to say hello. You got to show where you know where you are. Some guys would do that, though. I mean, I remember watching old clips of Robert Schimmel. I feel like he never said, hey, what's up.

That's true. He would always just be like, so a guy does this. He'll'll just open a bit you know i i kind of like that yeah i mean i'm i kind of like i don't like when the comic goes let's hear it for your mc it's like the guys the mc is getting the applause i completely agree and their applause you don't and just little fucking brow beating people with applaud yes i don yes like make some noise i do it if i'm on the road because i bring gary with me and i want them to like follow him on social media i want them to yeah or maybe at some point the first time go hey let's hear it again for my but i feel like just i don't and i don't like how how you guys do tonight i hate that like it seems

all unnecessary and just like start doing what you do. I mean, yeah. What's the purpose? Is it? I guess it resets. Kind of. Yeah. I get that you have to do something if there's a like a crazy energy change. Like you're following some high energy guy.

You have to address it somehow. Yeah. But you can do it in a more clever way than. Hey. Yeah. Yeah. Well, yeah. I mean, I'm not.

I get it. You know, you walk out of your greeting people. How's going but but i don't know just when the one with let's hear it for because if they see seven comics exactly let's hear it for the mc they all do it like they're the guy's not no one's he's not being deprived of applause yes he walked out to applause he's gonna walk off to applause yeah he just said your name you know he's you know it's not like some we don't have to applaud dmc do we also with those seven comic lineups or wherever how many they put up at the cellar i'm always nervous i'm at the end if i'm like doing some topical bit it's been hit oh yeah that's why i like i don't i basically don't allow guest sets in my shows same because mainly because i just want to get out there like i have my opener do 15 minutes

one opener for the most part you know sometimes you go we have a local guy okay let him do five and then but i want to get out there but also like the premises can get burned and you're like and even premises i mean i did a show once i used to do this joke about this Walgreens in Chicago. Oh, the rating? Like the reviews on it? No, no. It was about this, it used to be in a converted bank. And I don't remember how the joke went.

But a guy went on before me, did a joke about that Walgreens. No way. Yeah, it was a different joke. And then you have to go out there and go, well, this is weird, people. joke it's just like and then you have to go out they go well this is weird people bobby did a joke about the walgreens and lincoln in the wicker park and now i'm gonna do one neither of us were in chicago at the time oh weird but how about uh what about this this must have been page to stage hey i saw a guy with a neck tattoo. Whenever I see that, I always think, you forgot to not do that.

That one makes me cringe. I love that line. I love that joke. That's a great joke. It's just hard to listen to old. Mark, if someone pulled up bits off your first album, you'd probably cringe too, I guess. True, true. Let's do something off my special. But I honestly don't remember if I wrote that out.

I probably. I think about that line once a week i definitely thought of that and then wrote it out but i don't but forgot to not was a sentence i'd never heard before i thought that was well written yeah that's that would be like a great piece of movie dialogue yes but it's so like deep in your character i mean you when i say your character but like um what's he looking up i don't know i thought you're gonna go to his instagram or something and pull up a bit clips from the new special domestic because we rarely like i feel like this almost started as a joke podcast and we don't we got away from that a little bit yeah but you're a dude that i love to go into these with you know oh yeah you got a clip up there? Oh, there's one.

There's one, yeah. Which one's this? Glad we're eating out again. I've had some great exchanges with waiters and waitresses over the years. I love this bit. I had a waiter at an Italian restaurant

in New York City not too long ago. Hi, is it possible to get a decaf espresso? You're the worst. Okay. I don't mean to be all lawyerly but that was a yes or no question but if you want to go with

you're the worst that works fine anyway give me a decaf espresso with a big spoon of ketchup in it now I'm really bad. That's fucking brilliant stuff. Good stuff.

Important, important stuff. It's got to be rough to watch this. No, this is the one he's probably most happy with. It's been really good before the pandemic. Started taking a Pilates class. Ah, that's a good one. Consisted of me and three women who knew how to do Pilates. The instructor always had to make adjustments.

Jack, at least let's do that thing where we hang from a bar and do jumping jacks and sit-ups at the same time. Todd, here's some crayons. Is that hack? Why don't you mark up the wall for me, Todd? Crayons! Draw an owl for me.

Big owl with a lot of detail. All right, ladies, we're going to stand on our hands and put 100-pound weights on the balls of your feet. Todd, I don't know, download a Scrabble app. Clean, too. Or leave. Yeah, why don't you leave? I like that idea best walking's good exercise walk on air

yes I see your t-shirt it says I heart Pilates hit the road hit the road that's kind of cool really well shot too yeah it looks great

I tagged my Pilates instructor on that that really exciting oh nice all right yeah well i think i sent it to her but uh do you go to pilates a lot not no i haven't i used i was going pre-pandemic but what's great about your bits is you can tell it all happened yeah it's not like a hassan minaj it's like went there it's just uh like the waiter saying you're the worst i'm like that definitely happened and you can name i'd like to hear i'd like to hear todd meets hasan you know

guys sent me some uh anthrax recently yeah man but it's true you know what it is you take mundane shit and make it so damn relatable and so funny i mean thank you it's like everyday stuff where it is you take mundane shit and make it so damn relatable and so funny i mean thank you it's like everyday stuff where you're like i love bits like this where you're like well that's not a bit and then you see you do you're like oh that's a bit you just open up possibilities but i love when comics do that yeah brian regan's great at that so great yeah all right this premise i could i probably could have thought of this premise and then he just like 10 minutes of hilarious shit.

Yeah, and he's got his own wobble and everything. He's got his own way of delivering it, which a lot of people do. That dude's funny, man. Funny guy. He's a legend. Yeah, we're supposed to have him on here too, right? Is he still going to come on? He's going to drink us under the table.

Oh, yeah, he'll put him back. But you also choose good words. That old joke about the guy who's like, I love Coke, but I hate Pepsi. And you're like, oh, wow, so you love this thing but you also choose good words that old joke about uh the guy who's like i love coke but i hate pepsi and you're like oh wow so you love this thing and hate this thing that's the exact same thing as this thing with a fervor i don't know i remember you said so funny because last night colin quinn got furious at matt richards for drinking pepsi and he was drinking coke that's why the jokes are relatable that was such one. I'm like, that is a true thing.

Like, we watched his joke play out. Yes. Fervor. Yeah, I remember that joke. I don't remember the wording. I remember so many of your jokes. They're some of the most quotable jokes. I mean, you did a Letterman set.

I remember you have a joke where you say, I was just in Spain. Very aggressive prostitutes in Barcelona. Yeah. I mean, just that start to a joke is funny to me. Aggressive prostitutes. And what was the line? If you're this aggressive in the streets, what's going to happen when we get back to the youth hostel? That's a great bit.

Yeah, you're going to knock me off that top bunk. There's the tag. I mean, that's a great bit. And those late night sets were tough i mean it's crazy to think that's a pretty edgy late night bit yeah yeah i mean i was yes i don't think you could say prostitutes anymore but uh but yeah i that was yeah they i kind of pushed it a little bit i guess i don't push it it's surprising. Never knew what they were going to let you do and what they would hassle you as. How about the bit?

There's another great word choice. When you were hooking up with a girl and she was like, I don't like that kind of condom. And you're like, this is a bad time to show brand loyalty. Brand loyalty. That's great. That's from my first Conan. That's an old Todd bit. Old, old.

You can probably dig up my first Conan if you want to watch. Can we really? I would love to see a bit from it at least. Give can probably dig up my first Conan if you want to watch. Can we really? I would love to see a bit from it at least. Give me a bit and I want to see what you look like. Yeah, you're doing the rounds. Look at you. You're hitting all the pods. No, it's older.

Oh, that's an old one. Whoa, look at that. Oh, I remember the Chris. Is that the Chris? What's his name? The Chris O'Donnell? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that that one?

Yeah. That was a pretty funny one. Whatever happened to that guy? I think you have to look on Conan's website to find the... He has a website? I think he's working. I think dudes like that just work forever on some CBS show. Who's that?

That we don't watch, Chris O'Donnell. Oh, yeah, you're probably right. Yeah, I don't know. I think he's working. He's on Miami Vice 8. Well, even think about that guy, that actor William Peterson. He's richer than he ever would have been if he just became a movie oh totally csi and shit totally wow he got the cover mulaney by the way kanye's back you see that oh my god really is

he adidas uh re-signed him wow that's young is that Mulaney? That's a great Mulaney set, by the way. Oh, my God, he's a child there. I saw that in New Orleans, and it was blown away. Who's that guy in the middle? Old Conan really. He threw up everybody. He threw up a lot of. He gave comics a lot of love. Oh, yeah.

First credit. Yeah. Yeah, I think so. 29. That was my first one, too. Yeah, that was a big deal. I did. I remember you dabbed your forehead with his tie.

Yes, yes. And he was not pleased. No, I didn't love it. Yeah. He said, you're a psycho or something. It was on. No, it's 19. It was definitely on the team Coco.

We don't have to find you had an you knew we had a really great roast set who patrice o'neill i mean chevy chase and patrice o'neill the chevy chase one do you remember any of the chevy chase lines yeah i mean the one that a lot of people talked about it was like people you know i told people i was roasting chevy chase they said that's like shooting fish in the barrel and I go, it's actually as easy as standing near a fish in a barrel. Something like that. Was that night awkward as hell? Didn't he just hate the roast? Yeah, that was.

He, yeah, it was awkward. Not necessarily like where I was uncomfortable, but it was just clear that it just didn't have the, because he just wasn't taking the jokes the way. If you agree to a roast, you're supposed to just fucking howl at every shit. But it wasn't his friends. I feel like this set the tone. I didn't know if they had me in there.

I met him after I roasted him. Wow, that's weird. How was he? I just shook his hand. But he was sort of nice to me when he went up after. I think I caught him laughing. Oh, God. Look how cute.

Come on. The Chevy thing was so weird to me because from what I heard, that's the night he found out a lot of people didn't like him. Oh, there it is. Oh, yeah. I think. I don't know. If you're looking to level up your home with zero effort, Displate has you covered. Displate creates awesome metal posters that takes just 20 seconds

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93. Holy shit, Todd. Thanks, guys. Only 11 years after the phone call. I was listening to the radio today. I was. They keep playing this Michael Bolton guy. I can't stand this guy.

I remember the first time I heard Michael Bolton. My immediate reaction was, oh, man. I owe Barry Manilow an apology. The band was like, how in the hell? No mic. This guy is much worse. He is mucho del worse-o.

But there was a concert recently here in New York City. It's the truth. I like this trip. Simon and Garfunkel, followed by Paul Simon. Simon and Garfunkel, then Paul Simon. This must have been a great phone call for Art Garfunkel to receive. Hey Art, it's Paul.

Good news and bad news. Good news, I got us a gig. Bad news, we're opening for me. Yeah, and you gotta share a dressing room with Ladysmith Black Mambazo. It's gonna be a tight fit. There's 23 of them. But the big thing in music now and record stores are these boxed sets.

Have you seen these boxed sets? Wow, look at this. All the albums by one artist in a box. Who are these for? There's a guy standing there going, Who are these for?

God, I've never owned anything by the Oak Ridge Boys. I think it's time I owned everything by the Oak Ridge Boys. That's a good set. Let me see that. Wow. Great point. I remember that joke. I owned everything by the Oak Ridge Boys. That's a good start. Let me see that. Wow.

Great point. I remember that joke. I don't remember that one. I think I was one and a half hours, I think. I remember the Fugazi joke. This thing is heavy. 27 compact discs. Hey, it's only $500.

Includes a hip-hop remix of Elvira. Giddy-upper. You're so confident. Recently I did a little shopping recently. I did. Bought a wok. That is a great thing to have, a wok. With a wok and the privacy of your own home, you can create your own mediocre Chinese food.

For 50 cents less than ordering takeout. I'm standing over and going, oh yeah, I'm glad I'm making this stuff myself. Because those restaurants in Chinatown just don't make hot dog fried rice the way I like it. Park it for a sec. You were exactly the same.

You had it immediately, your voice. But it does seem like my voice sounds almost different, like I'm a boy in this one. Well, you're younger. Your voice changes as you get older. But the rhythm yeah is so you even now it's kind of impressive what's with that jacket what oh it's brutal the way i was dressed yeah the sleeves shutting i saw that like the green sleeve what is that patch on the oh it's a dog it's a borzoi i bought at a thrift store oh okay got it that was do you remember who was on that episode with you i do it was there's a bunch of guests it was this guy actor peter regert you remember him yes great you know

him he's from uh animal house oh i think it was me and he's in the mask he's in a ton of shit it's me you know this oh that guy's everything carol alt i don't know yeah wait how do we know what's she from again she She's a model. Yeah. And then there was one other. I was like, because I remember they had four. Is there any way you could see who was on that episode? Holy moly. She's hot.

Kind of milfy, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. She looks familiar. Carol Alt. Alt comedy. Wow. We're going deep diving here.

Well, this is season one of Conan.an wow you were also on larry sanders oh yeah i got that from that set whoa that was when you could still get stuff from a late night set nicole egert oh don martin that's right and then of course they leave me out of the oh that sucks um damn uh you got someone saw you on this and you're like you should gary shandling saw me oh wow submitted a tape and he's like you got the part look at that what was she was really cool like yeah like he did something that i mean i've talked about it before on one of my many podcast appearances but uh he But he came over to give me a note on the line I was doing. And he just said, he goes, only if you think this is funny.

And then he presented his note. What a guy. I could have said, no, I'm good, thanks. I was like, it's your show. I'll do it any way you want me to do it. Yeah. Yeah, I thought that was really respectful and also smart. I mean...

Yeah, you guys ran the whole show back then. It was like that was a hotbed of young Janines and Sarah Silvermans and Bob Odenkirks. Yeah. That was a fun time. Jay Moore was young. Yeah. I forgot he was on it.

Oh, yeah. Jay Moore was on Shanley? Larry Sanders? Wasn't he? I thought he was in the writer's, yeah. Jay Moore was on Chandler? Larry Sanders? Wasn't he? I thought he was in the writer's room. No, that was Jeremy Piven. Oh, Piv. Sorry.

But yeah, he was great on Larry Sanders. Oh, yeah. I mean, it was one of the best shows ever. I love it. It was classic. I mean, that was some of the best comic acting you'll ever see. I mean, insane. Jeffrey Tambor

and Rip Torn. Two heavyweights. On a, just a clinic. It's just so good. I was scared. I was scared. I had waited

until like 10 days on the set to introduce myself to Rip Torn. Really? Yeah, I was a little scared of him,

but he was nice. Yeah, he is intimidating. I think he was like a Marine or something. Yeah. Because I remember there's a story about

during Dennis Hopper's drug fuelfueled days on Easy Rider, Rip Torn was originally supposed to play the part they gave to Jack Nicholson. And when they sat down, Hopper was such a vicious, drunk, and awful. And he ended up pulling a knife on Rip Torn. And I think he just was able to get it away from him from his Marine days. And Rip Torn's like, fuck this guy. I'm not working with him. You know?

Wow. You ever heard the old Alec Baldwin, comedians in cars? He's telling Rip Torn stories. And he's like, and then I crack him in the jaw. And then I kicked him in the balls. And he goes, Jesus, when was this? He goes, last summer. He's just getting a bar fight.

It's at like 68. That guy was so funny. Defending your life, he's amazing. Oh, yeah. It's amazing. Men in Life, he's amazing. Oh, yeah. Men in Black, he's amazing. Oh, yeah, that's true. Is he alive? No.

Yeah! He was the best. He was great. Who else? I mean, man, you've been in, like, everything. You were in Flight of the Conchords, too. Flight of the Conchords. I think I was in The Wrestler.

That's right. Have you ever mentioned that before? That's the first time. I don't talk about it much but uh yeah and the wrestler an amazing movie wanderlust oh yeah how was working with mickey roar um i you know it was it was fine i didn't uh there wasn't a lot of chit chat sure takes like he's kind of an he's kind of like an intense guy he's in character yeah he's just not someone who you're not you don't really feel like oh he's not of an he's kind of like an intense guy he's in character yeah he's just

not someone who you're not you don't really feel like oh he's not going hey tell me so tell me you stand up right like he's not like that he was perfectly as nice as he had to be but you know there's a scene i talked about this where he in the deli where he started throwing stuff at me like i didn't it wasn wasn't in the script. And like he nailed me once with like a bag, a box of foil. And it was pretty intense. Whoa. But there was like scenes where Darren would say, all right, start this take by insulting his mother.

Then do a different, then the second takes now say this about his mother. Just to get, set him off. Yeah. It was just, it was kind of surreal because I used to, I mean, I loved Mickey Rourke when I was growing up. And now I'm doing scenes with them. Ins off. Yeah. It was kind of surreal because I used to, I mean, I loved Mickey Rourke when I was growing up and now I'm doing scenes with them.

Insane. Yeah. Showbiz. Went to the Venice Film Festival where it won the biggest prize there and that was cool. How was Marissa? She's nice.

I didn't work with her but she came into the cellar not too long ago. Oh, really? Sat down at the table and she's super friendly. Still looks great. Yeah, yeah. Got a huge crush on her. Yeah cousin vinny come on yeah seinfeld i never saw that movie does that hold up do you really know it's great oh it's like one of the best really great

comedy oh it's like perfect huh it's one of the it's like one of the 90s 90s is such a good decade of movies great comedy just like comedies but all but also like everything man like it's true forrest gump saving private ryan pulp fiction uh boogie nights yes cargo l.a confidential yeah i like confidential awesome i mean the night i feel like the 90s just like crazy and for comedies too it's it's do you watch a lot of comedies like i try i mean i'll watch i'll watch here and there like a new one just curious what they're making but yeah like if i watch them it's like classics you know i don't watch like i don't watch a ton of they don't make that many new ones not really no no the new tv shows i feel like they have to all have like this

heartwarming twist which kind of feels like they're almost talking down to you the fact that they have to make this kind of like warm blanket type of show which it's fine if they make those but it feels like that's the tone of everything now yes enough's enough and i like that shows like i love these bound and down i love shows like that would kind of like would push the envelope and really be outrageous so are you are you watching the other two have you seen the other two? Have you seen the other two? No. Yeah, it's great. It's great.

I think they're canceled. It's all, I've just caught on to it. Oh, Molly Shannon, dude? Yeah. She's incredible. But they got some jokes in there where you're like, whoa. Yeah, Molly Shannon, she's the nicest. I met her a couple of times.

I met her, I sent her a fan letter when I was a kid when she was on SNL. Really? And she wrote back. I have an autographed picture of her. Wow. Unless an assistant did that. I don't know i did that but then yeah i met her once at uh amy schumer had a had a party and she was there and rachel feinstein and i were like panicking because we were both late for a

seller spot and and molly shannon heard us panicking and sprinted across the street and found us a cab and i was like what an amazing human that's great to just be that like she's like just heard it was like i gotta help that's what i meant when i said she's the nicest yeah but what do you know her well no i used to know her just from um running into her i guess but yeah so i don't really know her but she's always extremely hey but i haven't seen her i sat behind her on a flight after that and i just i don't want to bother her so i'm saying you've been on flights with let's get into this oh yeah i don't know who who do you got i've never been on a flight with a cool guy oh uh warren baity what

yes i swear i buried warren baity i forgot i was in the back he was with annette benning oh first class i was in way in the back. New York, LA? Probably. I think LA to New York, actually. Yeah, it's crazy that he just... It's crazy to think he flies commercial. Yeah. He's just so famous. He looked rough, I'll say that.

That guy pulled some ass in his day. Yeah. I'm talking like 1980s Warren Beatty must have just been on a mission. Pull up that list. I mean... Bonnie and Clyde, he's a hunk. That's a great movie.

It's got to be in his 80s now, right? Yeah. Bullworth. Bullworth was kind of a miss. Yeah, I'd say so. The white guy rapping does not usually play well. I hate it all. It was a good concept, though.

But if they went a different way with it, it could have been great. Elle McPherson. Goldie Hawn. Cannesburg. Connie Chung, Barbara. Justine Bateman. Wow. Wow.

Jason Bateman. He fucked everybody. This is crazy. Joni Mitchell. Mary Tyler Moore. Bridgette Bardot. Who the fuck's Elizabeth? Candice Bergen is like.

Murphy Brown. She looked good late into however old she was. Yeah, yeah. She's still attractive. Man, oh man, oh man. Oh, is that Diane Keat? That's exciting. And he also just made cool shit.

He just has a cool career. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah. Bonnie and Clyde. What was another good one? Did he do shampoo? Yeah.

Oh, boy. He did, shoot. I mean, Dick Tracy, I guess. Oh, yeah. I like the one Tracy. Bugsy he did. Bugsy. Bugsy.

That's who we met in that Benning. That's an awesome movie. Jewish gangsters, baby. Yeah, yeah. Hey, there you go. And he's the one who read the wrong Oscar winner. I mean, I don't know if that was the following. Parallax View is supposed to be good.

Oh, McCabe and Mrs. Miller. Heaven Can Wait's a big one. Ishtar, that was a flop yeah not in a ton of uh blockbusters how about that that's why it's not a commercial although he produced a ton of shit i mean he made his money oh okay kid stays in the picture oh man wow role model do you watch you watch movies though you're a big documentary guy right i like documentaries i haven't i started watching this one janine garofalo turned me on to the series about the what is it this tour de france lance armstrong it's just about in general

how they train them and it's just it's pretty intense oh yeah like i'm not a sports guy but it's like holy shit this is crazy but uh it's so dangerous the way they're just yeah i mean i started watching some formula one and just like you just admire the angles they have to hit crazy yeah and then just like one little false move and it's a pile up yes eight you know 30 people behind you were crashing into each other i know and. And they all flew there. They worked their whole life. They trained. And then one fall. It's ruined. It doesn't look like fun. No.

No. It's a bike. Yeah. It's hell. It's a bike on a dirt road. It's like swimming. You can't really do. And it's not a thing you can like.

Like running, you can kind of throw your headphones in. But biking, you need to hear shit around you. Yeah. You can't be listening to a podcast. Doing the tour de France. You flipped to your death because you were listening to a Rogan app. You guys watching the new Beckham? I heard it's great.

It's pretty good. He's got like a docuseries about him. I didn't know he was that good of a player. I thought he was just a hot guy. No, he was great. It's crazy to get a great player. I don't think he's like top 10, but he was a great player. Great player who looks like that and then starts dating uh and marries a giant pop star i

mean it's like a chum for for tabloids it was a funny thing of them where i don't know if she was doing like an ig live or something she's doing something where she's like you know we grew up uh we didn't have a lot of money and he turns he kind of turns in he goes uh he goes what what car did your dad drive yeah is that in there that's in there yeah and she goes oh and he, what car did your dad drive? Yeah. Is that in there? That's in there, yeah. And she goes, oh. And he goes, what car? And she goes, a Rolls Royce. It was just like a funny. He goes, thank you.

So she was just lying about not having money? I think she was. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, but he's like fucking with her about it. It's pretty funny. That's really funny. And he's, I mean, it seems like they have a good thing, though. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. God, I hope so. He saw her on TV and goes, I'm going to marry that woman. And his friend's like, ah, shut up. And then there you go. Well, that's what Harry did, right? With Meghan Markle. Oh, yeah. God, I hope so. He saw her on TV and goes, I'm going to marry that woman. And his friend's like, ah, shut up. And then there you go. Well, that's what Harry did, right? With Meghan Markle? Is that right?

Yeah, it was like he called his people and was like, I want to dump a load in that. Wow. He did it. Imagine being able to do that. Not those words, maybe, but you know. He's right for. There's some tension with this. There's some Israel-Palestine thing going with this dog and cat.

Oh, yeah. They do not like each other. Who's who? Well, if she's close to me, I'm guessing she's Israel. Yeah, good point. I don't know. She's just trying to chill. Todd, do you have any peeves?

Oh, yeah. I was thinking about that. Oh, baby. A general peeve of mine when when things aren't user-friendly like i i was just did seven cities in nine days and one of the airports i got out of like didn't even have a sign for baggage claim like i had to walk like a good five minutes before like how do you not have that everywhere yeah or just like the signs telling you i get to uber and lyft i was just thinking like what city was the worst i don't remember but then you call that just happened to me all right you go through that

escalator go down four flights then go up a flight then go across the parking garage like maybe some signs yeah what is this lawrence of arabia it's like uber's a thing everyone knows it's a real thing and we want all use it yeah we have to get out of here so stuff like that well la made it the worst you have to take You have to take a bus to the thing. I'm like, I'm just taking smaller and smaller vehicles till I get to the fucking... Yeah, exactly. Yeah, so the last thing you want to do

is fucking get on another shuttle after. That's a good peeve. That's a good one. But yeah, the signage, that's a great point. Because then you've got to ask a guy, and they hate you because they've been asked 10 times. just put a big uber sign there should be more even when you're watching you ever watching tv and there's like give me a font the people on tv what do you mean if there's like sportscasters on and they don't font them i'm like who is that guy

oh i don't know who this guy is you know i see yeah i tweeted once about in a documentary where they i said that they should add that chironron on, if they refer to someone, like they show you at the beginning of the documentary that Bob is the forensic scientist. And then he's in like three hours later and you forgot who he was. Yes. He's like, show me again. That's a good point. Always tell me who that fucking guy is. Yeah, this might be my stupidity talking, but sometimes I'm a subtitle guy.

I'm all subtitle and they go too quick and now i'm like losing i have to rewind because i couldn't read it fast and i would just type out type out and go away do you guys have that are you quick readers i can do it all right i mean i you can pause i subtitle everything now same like i just because i'll end up rewinding shit and it's like especially if you're watching a British. Yeah, yeah. You'd be blown away how much you miss. But the user-friendly thing is just like, you know, a lot of people talk about when you go to a restaurant website,

and it's like, I just want to know when do you close? I just want to know when you close. Right. And I'm clicking through link after link. Scrolling. That should be. Yeah, our motto, our promise. You're like, don't tell me what you do with the potatoes. That should be. Yeah. Our motto. Our promise. You're like, don't tell me what you do with the potatoes.

Just give me a time. Well, another one is restaurants like. Here's an idea. A rec. Order from the restaurant and not through Seamless. Oh, yeah. Or one of these apps. And you save like $20.

Is that right? Oh, my God. Look at like what all these added fees are. They're the worst. It's like delivery fee, service charge. I think they appreciate it if you don't order through that app also. Really?

They take a big cut. Yeah, I think so. So why do people use it? Because it's so easy. It's seamless. It's seamless. There you go. I didn't know that.

I'm just going to do that. Yeah, the problem is not a lot of restaurants have websites so that's what you're dealing with right right damn the high-end ones i go to all have a website i got a uh you got a peeve yeah hit me bike riders on the sidewalk are making me crazy here and there i mean they're in that lane the lane even annoys me because it's like now used to used to be able to just you know zing across when there weren't cars but now you got to look for another thing yeah right and they're not there some of them are going fast some of them are like you know and they're going on you know green lights for us so that's what's

crazy but when they're on the the sidewalk i'm like fuck you dude you're not the you're the prey not the predator you're supposed to be with the cars not with us you know right so that that annoys me no i'm with you on that one i've had to pop up on the sidewalk before on a bike but i always make it quick yeah there's a different i mean there's people like moving yeah that's silly come on there's a packed sidewalk new York City. What are we doing here? Peeves. Peeves. Any Rex, Todd?

This is a funny one, a weird one, but there's this candy they sell at Trader Joe's. Oh, really? Called Cine Dragons. Pull it up. Pull it up. Cine Dragons. Their Trader Joe's has insanely good snacks. They're the best.

It's such I love their peanut butter Yeah they're Oh look at that bag Cinedragons It's just cinnamon Chewy candy But it's

Good one It's How'd you even find out about these? I just was shopping You know I do my own shopping And I Whoa And I just kind of noticed them

And I gave them a whirl But it's hard not to eat Like a whole bag of them Sure You rolled the dice I usually Someone has to tell me something's good if i before i roll the dice on yeah a new thing roll the dice on cinna dragons if you like cinnamon i encourage you to roll the dice i want to try one i wish i know and todd's peeves are gonna the next part are gonna be people who say roll the dice.

What, yeah, anything else? What else, what's in your Trader Joe's order? I always think that I'm going to, I just, I hate eating at home. Really? Yeah, I hate it. Just a bummer? I don't know, I just cook. Like, especially, you know, pandemic, I did way more, in the heart of the pandemic,

I did way more cooking than I ever thought i would ever do what's your what's your go-to thing if you are cooking i mean i remember making like a baked potato in the microwave or some pasta but i never really i never would do like i'm gonna do chicken the side of steamed broccoli it's just like you just have a fucking sink full of dishes like i've made like a baked potato like how are there nine dishes in the fucking yeah i just i'm that's the adhd whatever also because i think it's just like it's it's very overwhelming but to answer your question uh i buy like you know what trader joe's has but it's not there now maybe it's seasonal they have this jalapeno limeade. Oh, that's good.

That sounds really good. That sounds great. Look it up. Pull it up. Have you tried the cotton candy grapes? No. What's that? Those are next.

Just what they sound like. That looks damn good. That's right up my alley. There it is. Pull up cotton candy grapes, too. They're pretty good. Cotton candy grapes. Are they just a type of grape?

Yeah, but they're just awesome. They're just the best grape. You freeze them? Freeze them, dude. Whoa. Treat yourself. Look at that. I don't like the frozen.

Oh, you know what's good is that it triggers the freeze-dried berry medley. Ooh, those are good. Yeah. Those are good. Or those mangoes, the dried mangoes with the chili on them. This is officially turning into the worst date. What, Mark, do you cook, man? No, I can't.

My parents ask me, I'm like you, I like to eat out every meal. And my parents ask me, are you cooking yet? And I always say no no and they're so disappointed oh they're from new orleans all right yeah his mom's a real cook big foodie lady so i should always looks good i mean i remember brian ringing out that bit like everyone when they had this stuff laid out little bowls yeah i don't remember the whole bit all they open the oven and there's a there's a done one in there already i'm'm like, oh, that's the dream. But my lady cooks.

She's good. I just got an oven. Like I had my building, the gas was fucked up. So I had like 10 months without an oven in this apartment. And I just got it. So I started cooking a little bit. I have the same gas problem. Did you get a knock off the rent?

I don't fucking rent this place, you know. Oh, right. True. Damn. Did you get a knock off the rent? I don't fucking rent this place, you know. Oh, right. True. Damn. Did you? I emailed the guy because the lady's like, I want to cook, but I can't cook. So I said, fuck it. And I got three.

Whoa. Can I give one to her? I wonder. No, dogs can't have grapes or onions. They hate grape culture. Statutory grape. Oh, my God. It's good. I'm not a big grape guy, but I don't know. What? grapes or onions. They hate grape culture. Statutory grape. Oh my god, that's good. I'm not a big grape guy, but I don't know.

What? That's stupid. I love that. I'll tell you, I went to Bargatze's Radio City show. Incredible. He did three, I heard. Yeah, a lot of grapes. Oh, he's a grape guy? He's looking thin. When did he do Radio City?

Radio City. Oh, this past weekend? Who was with Zimmerman? Becky Owen was on the one I saw. Dustin Chafin. He killed. He killed. Dustin Chafin?

He opened. They're old friends. I haven't seen that guy in a long time. Nate's dad did a shit. He's a magician. Yeah. Nate's dad's a magician? And they love him. I hear they love him.

There he is. That's crazy. I had no idea. Look at that. 5,000. There's old Vic. We made fun of his outfit for about an hour and a half. He is in A Night at the Roxbury 2. Yeah, there's Chafin. Look at that. Wow. There's all of us

just yucking it up. Good crew. Good times. And he had lunch with Seinfeld the next day. Nice little trip. Mm-hmm. We got to get him back on here, man. And he did Fallon with Ian Laura.

That's kind of fun. Oh, that's pretty cool. With who? Ian Laura. Oh. Double comic. Those are the best ones. The best that I ever had in a late night show was the guest.

It was on Conan. It was Bill Hader, Bill Burr, and then me. And I was like, man, what a fun one to be on. Oh, wow. Yeah. Don't you get a little intimidated by that? I was a little intimidated, but I had a couple of whiskeys, and I think that put me. You drank whiskey before you?

I had two whiskeys before I went out, and I was like. Really? That's ballsy. I wouldn't be able to talk. I don't know i just felt loose and i was like let's fucking go but i was yeah i was definitely that was on what show on conan burr burr had a great caitlin jenner bit that he did before i went out and i was like i was watching him laughing but also kind of like well my shit's not going to be as jarring to them now. Yes, exactly.

It's almost like great. I had another one where I followed an actress who was not getting much from the crowd. And yeah, it was not as good a set. Yeah, yeah. I love following a comic who doesn't like the crowd. Yes. Anytime someone says, oh, they're not that good it's like oh they're gonna be good they don't like you right you're not buying what you're selling

you get to be the hero the best is when you go up there and eat it even worse and you're like fuck yeah right and that that could happen also yeah these are damn good those are good i fucking love those things man yeah are. Are you a big cotton candy grape guy? Bill Burr had a run on Conan where he was doing panel. That was like legendary. Yeah. For like a couple years. Do you prefer, you say you prefer stand-up or panel when you do it?

I think I like the prestige or the false prestige of doing panel, but I mean it. There were times when I've done it and you do end up doing your bits and it seems a little canned in a way totally and you never know what he'll say right right and if he's yeah i mean generally they've been no one's really stepped on my stuff but yeah but yeah it's all over for me man I had a good run. You're doing great, man. You got the new special out. Yeah. Yeah.

Call in the more late night. What happened here? We're having a good time here. I'm going to start crying. Unlike Simon, we're going to edit this to make it better, not worse. There you go. Look at that. 290,000 views.

Is that good? Hey, not bad. You're going to hit a million in a year, I'd say. In a year? That seems like forever. A million people is a million people. I think it helps. I think it helps on the road.

Does it help get a paid special? It might. Probably, yeah. Or a better? If you hit the mill, yeah. Do you have to hit a mill, you think? I think that's the cutoff. Do you still do a lot of, or do you want to do a lot of acting?

Because I know you do. I kind of miss it. I'd like to do something. I kind of wouldn't mind a regular job, acting job. I don't know. Really? Like a sitcom? Just so I could get SAG insurance.

Oh, I got it. Pretty good insurance. Health? Yeah. Yeah. No, dental. How did you get it? I did a couple of gigs.

Gigs? Like TV gigs. Really? Yeah, yeah. They all added up enough to get the insurance. Wow. What TV gigs did you do? Well, you know.

I don't know. I did the Schumer Show a few times. Scale. Okay, what else? A bunch of At Midnight's. Scale, yeah. Yeah, it's all scale. At Midnight, that was like years ago, wasn't it?

Yeah, yeah. I got in early. At Midnight was kind of fun to do back in the day. They brought it back. Homework, though. Yeah. But I prefer that to just going out there and winging it. I like having bits ready.

It's kind of fun. Yeah, definitely. They're bringing it back yeah who's is it no host or i guess there's no host right that's the whole thing i want to pay someone because i think the important thing was not making money well ain't gonna be roy wood i'll tell you that i could think he could still be the host though daily show i mean i think he took himself out of the running i didn't think he took himself out of the running i thought he took himself off the show no i think he's out i think he's out i think that was a statement like i'm not doing it

oh yeah i think you know i think he made himself available for long enough and and they made it pretty clear they're not going with him i think they want like in what their mind it's all about data now to them they don't care about no-brainer with him well to comedians it's a no-brainer to you know to a network whose prestige factor is now reruns of The Office. Right, exactly. Maybe they, you know. And another thing against Roy Wood, we're all a huge fan, but I think they

wanted something a little younger, sexier, kind of hipper. Is he? He's young. What is he, 45? Younger. He's younger than that. Oh, really? Still, he's young. He's got two kids, so I assumed he was a... All right, I was close. I won by a point.

Mark was very close on that one. But you were technically right. But yeah. He's also just like, isn't that the point of comedy, to cut your teeth and earn it? I mean, fine, if we're trying to find the next James Bond, I understand if you're trying to franchise a young guy or whatever. bond i understand if you're trying to franchise yeah yeah a young guy or whatever but if we're trying to get the best comedian agreed the prime is really growing it's like as you get older i would think i mean totally i just think every comic we talk about is like the greats they got

better go back to the headline yeah leaving the daily show but would. But would. I think Roy would be a decent James Bond. See? He's considering the host if offered. Yeah, he would do it, I'm sure. Oh, I didn't know that. I didn't know that either. I thought he took himself out. You should listen to me, man.

Fucked up, dude. No one's more tapped in to the showbiz than I am. Oh, look at that. How is SNL able to do the show with the strike going on? The strike's over. The writer's strike's over. SAG is still going on. As of now, by the time this is out, it might be over.

But I don't know. That's a good question. Maybe I should have brought that up on the pod. That's a great question. Are they not? Are the performers? Is there some way around that? They've got to be SAG.

It's a network show. I don't get it. Maybe they just assume it'll be over by then. Hmm. Scabs? No. That's good. Oh, yeah.

I didn't know that. Shit. Good question. Pete Davidson's hosting. I know. How do you like that? Well, Todd, plug some. Besides the special, what else do you have going on?

What are you going to be talking about? I'm on this half-joking tour, which is half, first half is jokes, the second half is crowd work. It's the best thing you can do when you don't have a new hour. And that's going all over. And go to my website, toddbarry.com. Probably get some clips out of that, too. You've got to film those.

Oh, I know. I saw a guy with a funny, that guy, Alex Hooper, I think his name is. He had a funny tweet where he's like a comic doing 10 minutes set. You're next.

Wait, let me just set up my seventh audience camera. It's tough to do on showcases. If you're headlining a show, it's fine. I mean, I could have done it

this past run. We did a crowd work special. It was a great idea. You did it before everyone was doing it. Yeah. True. I could have done it this past run. We did a crowd work special. It was a great idea. You did it before everyone was doing it. I'm the renegade. Oh, Bell House. That's an afternoon show, the Bell House in New York. Nice. Yeah, 4.30.

Alright, the dog's snoring. Nola Brewingco. Hey. Is that a good place? Yeah, it's not bad. Paper Tiger. Go see Texas, place? Yeah, it's not bad. Paper Tiger. Go see Texas, Cleveland, Atlanta, New Orleans, Pittsburgh. Go see Todd. Raspberry.

Yeah, is there anything else? Yeah, my Instagram is Todd Barry. But check out the special on YouTube. One of the best. Truly a killer comedian, and it's a killer special. Great jokes. So watch it now, guys. After this, go check it out.

Tell a friend. Thanks for having me. Of course, man. We'll bump you up to 300K views. Providence, Cleveland, coming to Grand Rapids, Denver, Grand Junction, Hartford, Concord, New Hampshire, Mobile, Alabama Mobile Alabama Nola Santa Rosa Sacramento Omaha Kansas City Norfolk Baltimore Birmingham

oh I'm doing the beacon January 24th yeah hopefully we're gonna have one who knows doing the beacon MarkNormanComedy.com get some bodega cat tell a friend queef it up get a mug get a cup.

This weekend, you could see me Pittsburgh. Where do we have? No, no, no. It's come before. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, Pittsburgh, Cleveland, Columbus, Cincinnati, Indy, all this week. And then November 4th, a big one, MSG, Theater at MSG, New York, New York, baby. November 4th, then I'm all over Australia. Hell yeah.

And then we got Vegas, Tampa, Fort Myers, Buffalo, Springfield, Missouri, Madison, Philly, Dania Beach, Omaha, Dallas, OKC, Irvine. Going back to the clubs. Oh, yeah. I'm going to make sure it's airtight for when I film in Boston at the Wilbur March 7th and 8th. So filming a new special March 7th and 8th. Check it out. March 7th and 8th, Wilbur, Boston.

Hell, yeah. And definitely watch Todd's special right now. And order some Bodega Cat at bodegacatwhiskey.com. We love you guys. And Trader Joe's. Send us some free shit. We plug the hell out of you. These grapes are five good

i've had a little too much bourbon and norman's talking shit about the fucking pope and i get down in the same way And I get down in the same way. Up on the roof like a cop's coming. And naked Samuel is feeling dangerous. I'm out to lunch here in New Orleans. This woman doesn't look like I remember her. And I get down in the same way. We might be true