We Might Be Drunk - Ep 161: Bodega Cat Sidecar

Episode Date: January 8, 2024

No guest with us tonight just the guys and some Bodega Cat Sidecars.  Join us for a great episode with some great peeves, bits and recs.  Catch Mark and Sam on the road in 2024! Mark Normand: https://marknormandcomedy.com/#schedule!loading Sam Morril: https://www.sammorril.com/ Shop: https://www.wemightbedrunkpod.com  Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/wemightbedrunkpod Bodega Cat: http://www.bodegacatspirits.com  We Might Be Drunk is produced, recorded and edited by Gotham Production Studios. Head producer: Matthew Peters https://www.gothamproductionstudios.com/ If you want to start a podcast contact [e-mail] for a discount on services when referred by WMBD! 

Ah! Happy New Year! We're here, we're queer, it's uh, January folks. I guess we're not doing dry January here, bitches! We thought about it. I thought about it. But then we both looked at each other and was like, we could have won. Yeah! That's literally how every bad night of ours ever started. That's so true. We could have won.

Yeah, that's true. Caught us leaving the cellar at 6 a.m. You got that right. Yeah, man. Yeah, it's dry January, but just cocaine. That's dry, right? Okay. But yeah, I'm back from Mexico.

Yeah, look, the pictures were incredible. It's an incredible place. I couldn't believe you were on vacation. Like, Mark is so avoidant of any time off. Like, we all are, but, you know, I'm texting with him just like, oh, what club are you at this weekend? What theater are you at this weekend? He just sends me a picture of him and May on like a drunk boat.

Yeah, yeah, basically. I'm like, wow, all right. Yeah, like a booze cruise on a canal. And then I thought, he's doing a cruise. I'm a boat act now. I did do some bits on there. Yeah. But, yeah, crazy, crazy week.

But I still did a show in Shreveport, Louisiana in a theater on Christmas Eve, which was a big fight at the house. You know, she's like, you're doing a show on Christmas Eve. I'm like, why can't you do Christmas Eve? Christmas Eve is like a show night, I think. Well, Christmas, I get you take off. But Christmas Eve is like, it's like the night before Thanksgiving. It's got good energy in the air.

That's true, but you're showing your Judaism here. I mean, Christmas, it's a thing. It's like a woman with a birthday. It's all week. Plus, I got to get to her house, so I got to get to Boston. Oh, you did a show in Boston. No, no, no. I did a show in Shreveport.

And then you flew to Boston on Christmas Day? Yeah, that was the fun. I get why she's mad at you. Yeah, but, no. I did a show in Shreveport. And then you flew to Boston on Christmas Day? Yeah. That was the fun. I get why she's mad at you. Yeah. But I got made it. It all worked out. So thank God. And I said, hey, we're going to Mexico for a week and a half.

What the hell? That's how you get out of shit. I pulled a thing where I booked something on Valentine's Day without telling my lady. And she was like, you did that? And I was like, I'll spend the two nights before with you. And she's like, all right. OK. But I don't think. I'm just like, oh, yeah. spend the two nights before with you. And she's like, all right. Okay.

But I don't think. I'm just like, oh, yeah, you're not a fucking annoying person. You don't care about Valentine's Day. But they are women. Yes, yes. And they talk to their female friends. Yes. And they're like, what did he do for you? Exactly.

It's like he's going to Texas for a gig. Right. Not romantic. And then they're like, but was he miserable? Because if he wasn't miserable, it doesn't count. Like, why does that matter? It matters. Yeah, women like you to suffer because that means it's real love, I guess.

Is it? I disagree. I mean, what's that old famous story where the guy got free flowers and he gave it to his wife? And she was like, oh, my God, thank you. You're the best husband ever. He's like, yeah, I got them for free. Can you believe it? She was like, wait, what?

And now she hates the gift. But it's still the same gift. You know what? I love the old street joke you ever heard the one uh gilbert godfrey told it on his album great his album dirty jokes oh that's a classic they're all street jokes but they're hilarious yeah and he had uh he had the line where he goes the guy is drunk at the bar he pukes all over himself because he's so shit face he's like oh my wife's gonna kill me and uh the bartender goes just put a $10 bill in your front pocket. Say some other guy puked on you, gave you the money for the dry cleaning. And he was like, that's great.

So he goes home and his wife's like, what the fuck? And he goes, some other guy did it. He put a $10 bill in my front pocket. She looks at it. She goes, this is a $20 bill. He goes, he also shit in my pants. What a great joke. Classic. is a $20 boy goes he also shit in my pants what a great joke classic street jokes have this weird

bad rep but they're they're they're really hard to write and they're really smart have a bad rep because if a comic is doing them on stage that's the problem like offstage they're the best yeah we like that's like that was a big part of our culture like you got any jokes you know two guys walking a bar a black guy of a priest or whatever it was. Those are the best. Can we get a bodega cat? Can you grab me that? Wait, what about this? Oh, right here. Here we go.

I didn't see it. That one's got one shot in it. Open them all. I've been on a sidecar kick lately. Wow, sidecar. That's a good one. Well, you get sick of it. I was doing paper planes at home.

I was doing, I'll do a Boulevardier. I'll do a Manhattan, I'll do just straight whiskey. But every once in a while, it's like you get sick, you want variety. What's in a sidecar? Can we pull up a recipe there, Google bitch? It's really just this stuff, Cointreau, I guess. Is that how you pronounce it? Cointreau. Cointreau.

I'm trash. Bodega Cat whiskey. It says two ounce cognac, a third of lemon juice. You can do a whiskey one. You don't need to do cognac. A third of triple sec. Okay. Triple sec.

What is triple sec? Is that a liqueur? Triple sec. Yeah. It's like a, I think it is. It's what I was having before we got married. Triple secs. Now it's once a week.

All right. We had to liqueur. Liqueur asshole. That's on Christmas. All right. You had to liqueur. Liqueur, asshole. That's on Christmas. But yeah. That was a big thing. Anal. Remember you got an anal for your birthday?

That was like a cliche. Yeah, that was like the corny joke. But like, I never was into anal. I'm not into it either. They're just so fucking miserable. And it hurts my ass. They're miserable. It doesn't feel as good. It's it's wet that i don't really get

the upside except for the the win it's almost that's our flowers you gotta suffer you know the win is really yeah a great casino and uh and a nice asian guy i know oh yeah winnie when she's's back. Nice Gucci threads there. It's real Louis Vuitton. It cost me 47K. That's a little fake fur thing, but I think it keeps her warm, man. It's getting cold out there. She's got the worst diarrhea outside.

I was with her for like, that's why I was late. She was shitting for like 10 minutes. Jeez, you guys are one and the same. Got to stop feeding her fajitas for dinner. What is that? The drip? That's what the kids, because she's got the drip? I don't know.

Nice drip. I've had that in spring break. I had the drip. Anytime a woman's wet, I'm happy. Dude, so you were telling me you saw Salt Burn. Because I watched a lot of movies over the break. So did I. Because it's like, you know, there's a lot of good new movies out.

All the kids are talking about this movie Salt Burn. Oh, yeah. To me, it's like kind of a shit version of Talented Mr. Ripley. It looks beautiful. Oh, yeah. It's beautifully shot and the scenery. Acting's great. That kid, he's a phenom.

I know, but I could have done with a little less cock. A lot of cock. A lot of cock. A lot of cock. That's like the new tits. It's the new tits. You're right. Soda was saying to me last night how I saw Dan Soda and he was like, you know, because he talks about his hair transplant and he was saying how it's like the new fake tits.

Yeah. Because you don't want to talk about it in front of your bald friends. It's like that's like your flat friend. And every time I see him, he's like, feel it. All right. All right. It feels real. Look at that.

Feel it. Yeah. He's got a bit about it. Maybe I'll give him that. I don't know if he does the feel it part. But yeah, the acting is great. It's beautifully shot. The cinematography is incredible.

The castle, you know, they always say the castle is its own character, you know. And I thought the mom was funny. She's fucking hot still, too. Super hot. Yeah. What's she in? Gone Girl. That's right.

A ton of shit, though. She's in a ton of shit. She might have been my favorite character. She was hilarious, and that's like a believable type of character. But, like, I don't know, man. You know, I get the premise. It's like the kid is enamored with this rich world. But it was like, it almost felt like, this is going to sound like a burn, but like people who are really into boondock saints.

It's like, it's almost like tried to be too smart. And it just didn't feel that smart. It was like a shiny, you know. The soundtrack was pretty fucking good though soundtrack was that song at the end uh murder on the dance floor whatever it is oh yeah great tune great tune it was perfect for the ending and i don't want to give much away but i thought the sex stuff was so over the top and i'm not a squeamish guy you know you can jizz in my in my soup and i'll eat it and i have yes a chowder but

i thought it was just like weird and unnecessary and didn't make sense a lot of it and i'm no prude trying to be like edgy it was trying to be edgy yeah like it's almost like when a comic comes out and he's like are you offended you're like you haven't even spoken yet yeah right it's like that type of shit and it wasn't that hot like i don't want to give anything away but the period scene i was like this is weird yeah it didn't make sense and the the fucking the grave oh geez i'm saying too much but it felt like there were like no spoilers he fucks a grave yeah yeah i like that they went for it i liked uh the characters and all that but i just yeah i didn't see your other movie that a lot of people said was better, Promising Young Woman. I haven't seen that either, but I'll check it out because I think he's talented, the

guy who made it. She. She. Cut that. I turned to that person. Yeah. What's the doctor's, what's the doctor, what's his name? Her name?

To me, it's just a movie about how angry short men are. And I already saw Napoleon. Yeah. Oh, here we go. You know what I liked? Did you see Anatomy of a Fall? No, I never heard of it. Is that the staircase?

No, but it's not the staircase. It's a French movie, but it is about a murder. But it's about, or is it? That's kind of the movie. It's a French movie. but it's about or is it that's kind of the movie it's a french movie and it's about they're uh i won't give too much away but the but the the gist of it is they're in this like the french alps it's beautiful looking like you can see right there a man falls to his death and the thing but then the examination is like i think he was hit before he fell and it's kind and they have a kid

together and they all blame the wife so it's like did she or did she not do it how the son is dealing with it it's very good psychological thriller very much okay i'll check it out and it was uh i thought it was a really good movie well you got my my asshole because i was watch i watched a simple plan how good is that it's so good i got the wife watching she's like this movie is that movie? It's so good. I got the wife watching it. She's like, this movie's incredible. I know. It's so simple, but yet it's so powerful. It was just like, I feel like that type of movie where you find the money and it tears

a group apart. Yeah. It could be so predictable and formative. Yes. But it remained like unpredictable and what's going to happen. I feel like every scene mattered. Oh, yeah. I'm so glad you were.

I feel like we're on the same page, I feel like, with a lot of movies. i'm so glad you want i feel like we we're on the same page i feel like with a lot of movies we just want a good story and i know a good script that's all i care about billy bob was so good and he's so cute and dumb and likable he's great did you watch the julia roberts joint no what's that is that the end of the world yeah leave leave the world behind i believe yeah uh i i didn't love it it took me two two sits to watch it it stunk okay salak you hated it i heard it was good until the end veter veter was like veter we're on the road he's like you gotta watch it and i was like all right and then the next morning he's like, it stinks. How did that happen?

Yeah. I made us a sidecar. Well, there's definitely a trend going on with like the world ending and all this shit in movies. So you can tell that's where we're at in our generation. Cheers. Here we go. Cheers, folks. Hey, look at this.

You got a Resoluche? I don't know. Wow, that's damn good. That's pretty good, right? that's damn good pretty good right that is that you know people put sugar on the rim but i don't like i don't i'm good with the sour no rim job what it reminds me of a painkiller you ever painkiller those are great and there's also the other one the penicillin yeah penicillin very similar yeah it's like the scotch and uh gingery it's kind of good it's good for a hangover and uh when i was in hawaii i'd wake up i did like a week in hawaii for one night and it doesn't really

work because it's hawaii but did you actually just do the gig one night and then no i think i did like a two-night gig and i went there for five days such a bitch of a flight i know but time changes it's a lot oh yeah but you know funny we like literally we get gigs in hawaii and we're the only people that we travel so much we fucking complain about it. That's true. I'm like, ugh. I know.

I didn't go. Because I was like, I'm fucking 80 cities last year. I don't need to. You don't need to. Because I was going to do it to route it with Australia. And I'm like, I'll just go to Australia. Just go to Australia. It's nice to sometimes have a vacation when you're working and be like, okay, now I'm

going to take two days for myself. Not really. Yes. But, yeah, you kind of have to do all or nothing, I think. I agree. Although you get the tax write-off if you do a gig. Oh, true. I don't know.

Damn, I should have done that in Mexico. You would have ruined the vacation. Oh, she would have hated it. You're just going on before that little Mexican wrestling match marked as five minutes. El Comideo. Yeah, I didn't know Brad Williams was there, too. But yeah, I tagged him in that, by the way, I didn't know Brad Williams was there, too. But yeah, I tagged him in that, by the way. I don't know if he's caught that yet.

He's coming on soon. Yeah. Get a phone book. This is his glass, actually. We'll get him a thimble. But how was the trip to Mexico, though? Was it fun? It was fucking amazing. It was a bitch getting there.

Our flight got canceled. We missed a amazing. It was a bitch getting there. Our flight got canceled. We missed a connection. It was a whole thing. It took like a day to get there. So we lost a day. Delta can suck it. Damn. We missed the connection because some guy left his bag on the plane.

So we had to wait for him to get his bag before we get bored. And then we boarded half an hour late, and we missed the next connection by half an hour. That's insane. It was brutal. That's fucked up. Yeah. You know what bugs me now, a peeve on these connect flights

is when you're on the little plane and you get off but you can't put your stuff in the overhead because the plane is so little. Yes, yes. So now you just have to wait and it's always someone who doesn't know how to, they're like,

ah, I don't know how to get the door open and you're like, I got to fuck another. I got a connection. I watched one guy just lose his shit and I was like, well, I'm not going to do that but this guy was like, what the fuck? Yeah. And I was like, o gotta connection I watched one guy just lose his shit and it was like I was like I'm not gonna do that but this guy was like

what the fuck yeah and I was like oof I know once I'm at a I was in Springfield, Missouri I'm like

once I'm at a Springfield I'm good I was in Chicago I'm like I'm in a like you know I can figure something out in Chicago

yeah I've been in Springfield three nights I gotta get out oh completely fun for three nights but at a certain point I just need a change

of scenery yeah well that's the problem with the road is like hawaii and springfield are not that different when you're on the road i know as crazy as that is to say but it's just like i'm in a hotel room i gotta get out i gotta fly whatever well springfield's a little different but play the clip i just i sent you oh text i text did i not text it to you checking now oh yeah you just did so uh this is we're trying to kill a day in Springfield, and I was like, let's do some Missouri shit. So look where I take Gary Veeder. There you go.

Finally, Veeder's in his element. Oh, wow. That's good form. He was a good shot. He was very accurate. I was fine. He was very good. Yeah.

Whoa. I mean, from the the back you're like skinhead wait oh no no it's a make a wish he's so happy he's like i'm good right yeah we do we use some crazy shit how'd you like shooting it was fun it's not my it's not like not my thing but it was like i opened with a bit about like you know shooting a gun people like to trash guns it's a lot like a baby. They're easy to hate. But once you hold one.

Oh, that's good. Yeah, that's good. Kind of fun. But. Until it unloads on you. My kid asked me. I felt really smart the other day. He asked me, why do guns do this?

Why do guns do this? Kick back. Kick back. And like I just thought about it for one second. And I was like, oh, I think. I don't really know the answer. But I think because the gun wants to actually do this pullback. Yeah.

But since your elbow's on a hinge, it goes up like this. Oh. Well, yeah, we used something. One, you have to put it in your shoulder. We used a big one. Yeah. But then, dude, I fired the Colt.44, too. No video?

Dirty Harry. I don't know if I have video of that one, but damn, you pull back the hammer because you don't want to, if you just pull the trigger, it takes a while to pull and it's like all anticipation. So I pull back the hammer. So I just, but holy shit, I'm like, boom. Oh, I see. It's pretty intense. How's that feel?

Wow. Yeah. Well, that's a video. Yeah. Damn. Is that the one with the, it's got the revolving bullets. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When you push it out and they're like, don't just whip it in because you're going to want

to do that, but it's bad for the gun. I was like, what? Ah, damn. That's in every movie. Is it a revolver? The Colt 44. 44? 44 Magnum, I mean.

Not the 44. Oh, okay. I misspoke. Man, but they have all those guns there. They had like the little Derringer, you know, like, which I think of as like the cock gun and kiss, kiss, bang, bang. Oh, yeah. You know, he's tied up and he's talking shit and he shoots him through his dick yeah look at that fucking thing that's a cannon dude it it's a lot but they just

have a ton of i mean it was like a fun way to kill a day i was like you know it's not a thing i'm probably gonna make a hobby out of being a new york jew but it was it was a good time do other people do that like other countries do they shoot for recreation i'm sure parts but i don't think i think america's got to be the the spot for that yeah i think that's what people don't get when they're trying to like you know control guns it's like guns are fun it's fun to shoot fucking guns yeah you should speak at a school but there's a video there's literally montages on youtube of hours of people kicking back and like hitting themselves in the face the gun goes flying behind them you think all the time like the way you hold it it's like you think it's going to be like a movie and it's

i mean i'm a novice so i i'm sure people are listening like you fucking rookie but you're like you know uh i thought i did pretty well for the first for the first uh first time but yeah we tried a bunch of different stuff just to uh you know, the.22 was my favorite. Oh, really? Yeah, it was just easy to. Yeah, you're no size queen. You like a little. Well, it has a long handle.

You know, so it just, the grip was easy for me. Yeah. Oh, you see, like, it just, there's millions of these. This guy's going, oh, my God, that's kind of not. Yeah, well, you got to be safe. That's the thing, too, is the guy's like, he's like, we can save the Invader and I are just like, we're pretending to put it behind our back. We didn't really, but you know.

Yeah, yeah. But I did it once in Houston and we got the AK just like, all right, fuck it. Let's go all out. And we had to get the guy next to us like, we can't load it. And he was like, you fucking homos. And he had to do it. And he had like a cowboy hat on. It was brutal.

Yeah. It's harder than it looks because he's just like, I'll point and shoot. But you got to like. That same guy, he's on the subway. He's like, I don't. And you're like, here, follow me. Yeah, that's true. That's true.

But yeah, I'm with you, man. I'm not into the big guns as much. I think the little ones are like more fun. Maybe because I just watch too many uh detective movies yeah yeah you know you're just also you're just like go ahead make my day it's kind of fun you know yeah this is too much it's like it's too much that's no fun you want to look cool and it feels like a war weapon yeah hunting i don't know but uh no no even that's too big we sound like asian women you know just uh just give me like a glock and then you want to do that where it falls out it's fun as hell that's a move you feel like

john wick in that moment yeah just falls out you catch it yeah or the uh yeah you pull it back i fucking love that yeah it's funny because you go to these gun ranges and you're like i want to be john wick i want to be this guy. I want to be James Bond. And then they go, don't do this. Don't do that. And it's all the shit that you want to do. You can't do. You're like, don't get revenge?

Fuck. Yeah. It's like going to a hooker. They're like, don't kiss. You're like, come on. I want a kiss. But yeah. So yeah, that's fun.

But yeah, Mexico, we finally got there. And we had a great time. We did shrooms. We got drunk. Everything's cheaper there, which is fun. But yeah, Mexico, we finally got there and we had a great time. We did shrooms. We got drunk. Everything's cheaper there, which is fun. I got pesos. I'm throwing it around like the cartel. We went to the midget wrestling.

We went to the canals. We did all the great restaurants. I mean, we had a blast. We went to the Soho House Party and we got dolled up and Andy Warhol was the theme. So I put on like a crazy shirt and she's all uh what do you call it see-through and billy eichner was then you got shot really young yeah billy eichner do you say what's up to him nah he was in his element he was he's looking great by the way i heard his movie's good i love that show he did uh difficult people that show is so funny

that was my plan was to go up and go difficult people but i didn't want to bother him. He had a whole group of gays with him, and they were rocking out and everything on the dance floor, so I didn't want to. But he looks good. Yeah, difficult people is funny as shit. Oh, yeah. It's fast-paced. Yeah, punchy as hell. Yeah.

Mm-hmm. So, yeah, that was cool. And then, of course, last day, she got the parasite. What? Yeah, Montezuma's revenge. Damn. Shitting. When I say she shit 48 times in a day and throughout the night, she got no sleep.

It was bad. I'm going up to the pharmacy in the morning. She got no sleep, just shitting. I just hear the toilet flushing all night and her like, oh, God. You just slipped divorce papers under the door. toilet flushing all night and her like oh god you just you just slipped divorce papers under the door uh and i went up to the pharmacist and i was like wife shido bad uh toilet ruined oh i'm doing all this shit and the guy was like i don't that bad dad they don't really speak english there by the way it's not one of those things and you know they shouldn't but i thought they

would that's an american comment i know they should have spoken my language well you go to amsterdam and they can kind of go oh you want a beer all right here you go you idiot it's closer yes yes and uh you don't speak spanish i don't speak any spanish i picked up a little since being there but i don't speak any spanish and eventually after like 10 minutes of me going back and forth with like pouring out assholo and he was like diarrhea and i'm like yeah it's the same word i was like i didn't know you guys had diarrhea i figured that was an american term but it's so common there that he's like take this this and this she took it and she was healthy in like half a day she was back so yeah it's no joke i mean she was wrecked what did she get it from

i think the water i think the ice that's crazy that you can't drink water there. You cannot drink water! And you can't have water. It's a major country, 20 million people, no water. You gotta do bottle water, filtered water. Well, I think their system's used to it. They can drink the water. No! They can't drink the water? They can't even drink it. It's such a fascinating place, because you can't really walk around

at night, and you get abducted. There's millions and millions of Disapero all over these posters with their faces on it. There's millions of uh disapero all over the these posters with their faces on it there's millions of them and you're like this is good pr that's what it says disapero mexican magician yeah i am disapero i'll take your children and make up disapero but yeah he abducts him like this yeah yeah is this your child? Yeah. But then there's no litter. I mean, it's beautiful. It's lush.

The streets are clean as shit. I saw two hobos in 10 days. But yet you get abducted. You can't drink the water. So it's like this weird opposite land. We don't really get abducted, but we can drink the water. We got litter and graffiti everywhere. But, you know, you get what I'm saying. I'll take ours. I'll take ours. I'll take ours too. I drink the water. We got litter and graffiti everywhere. But, you know, you get what I'm saying.

I'll take ours. I'll take ours. I'll take ours, too. Yeah. I need that water. When you're hungover and you're like, oh, I got to go out and buy a jug of water, it's a bummer. You got to prep for it.

You got to prep. I'm doomsdaying over here. Yeah. So that was weird. You know what? Speaking of doomsday, you know another good fucking movie I just watched? Uh-oh. Did you see 10 Cloverfield Lane ever?

No. I saw that. John Goodman? Tim Robbins? Yeah. Yeah, I saw watched. Uh-oh. Did you see 10 Cloverfield Lane ever? No. I saw that. John Goodman? Tim Robbins? Yeah. Yeah, I saw that. It's a Cloverfield movie, but it's like end of the world movie and a woman gets in a car crash and-

They're in the suburbs? No, she wakes up in his basement. Oh, yeah. And he won't let her leave because he's like, we're under attack. And it's like, is he or is he not telling the truth? It's pretty crazy. That is psychological. It's really good.

Yeah. I forgot about that. John Goodman fucking rules. Oh, he's the man. Underrated actor. He didn't get brought up as a great actor, but he kills it in everything. I feel like people think of him as a great actor. King Ralph. Big Lebowski.

Yeah, exactly. Fucking, yeah. Roseanne. Roseanne, he's great. Great. Inside Llewyn Davis. Oh, yeah. Babe Ruth, too.

That's right, the babe. Dude, yeah, what else? I mean, that that's crazy but she's feeling better though totally fine today but it was a it was a rough road back and her asshole is just blown out and uh yeah but we had a great time the food's amazing maybe the best food city i've ever been to what were you eating i mean we i kept pushing for the mexican i'm eating street tacos everywhere she so she hated me she's like you're drinking cocktails all night with ice i accidentally took a sip of water at one point which was she was like what are you doing i was like oh i forgot i never got sick so what do you would you what should you drink just neat cocktail just neat like neat and yeah you can drink like a jack and coke i guess or you got to drink it quick

because that ice will melt, I guess. I don't know. But some places have filtered ice. It's a mind fuck. You can't relax because of the water. But I was eating street tacos all day. I'm like, old Mexican lady. That's what gives you Montezuma's revenge.

What? Over there, the street tacos. Yeah, yeah. Like you eat halal here. That's what fucks my life. Oh, that'll kill you. I used to always eat that like 50 whatever street, you know, those halal cars. Oh, yeah.

Those are great. But that white sauce that's sitting around all day in the heat. You got that right. Forget that. It congeals. It will light up your stomach. And then you ask for the hot sauce. That is some spicy fucking sauce.

Yeah, I think that offsets the white sauce. That like kills the bacteria in the white sauce. Maybe. But it also kills your stomach. It's ISIS going at you in there. But yeah, we had a great time and I would go back. I always say if I run over a kid on accident and I have to flee the

country, where would I live? This is on my list. Really? I mean, I hate the water thing. Everyone says bucket list, but there should be a run over a kid list. Yeah. Like somewhere you can go or write a novel. You know, you go somewhere, you sit in a tiny apartment with a good view and you drink. You won't miss ice?

I drank it all. You know what you could do? You could just have ice at home and you just get a bottle of water and do it in a tray, I guess. It's funny because they're both, they can't do ice and they hate ice in Mexico. They hate both ices. That might be something. Oh, we got something there. I just thought of that.

That's good. I don't know. No ice and no ice. But also, and this might be my ignorance speaking, it's such a beautiful place. It's so fun. There's so much to do. Why do people want to come here so bad? I'm like, if I was Mexican or Venezuelan or whatever, I'd just go live in Mexico City.

Yeah. I mean, I know the American dream is this. There are some people, there are Americans who go to Mexico City, though. Oh, yeah. They're sick of us. But I'm just saying, go there. You know the American dream is this. There are some people, there are Americans who go to Mexico City, though. Oh, yeah. They're sick of us. But I'm just saying, go there. You know the language. It's cheaper.

It's, I don't know. I guess there's less opportunity, but. So in your fantasy, when you run over the kid and you flee to Mexico. Yeah. Are you hiding out or are you kind of living in the open? Because you're kind of recognizable. Yeah, but I'm out of jurisdiction. So I'm kind of living in the open, I guess.

I feel like in mexico city they'd get you though right yeah probably you got to go somewhere like really where they fucking hate america oh venezuela venezuela could be good yeah but i hear that's a shit show i mean every every country's got nice parts i'm sure but like dude i just love i go i look i love traveling anywhere but like new york i just love love and I love America like even the parts that are sure like I love that we're just on the road every week and you're just like I mean it's fun to just pop into Philly it's fun yes pop into Boston different everywhere San Diego SF like wherever I kind of love it you kind of don't really need to leave I hate to say we got so much variety with like you go to Portland, Oregon, though. Sure. But then you go to Miami.

It's like night and day. But great city. Yeah, exactly. We got a little everything. It's fucking awesome. We got a great country. And I know everybody shits on America, but we are so much more diverse. Mexico felt very homogenous.

It felt very Mexican. I didn't see a lot of black people at all. I didn't see a lot of like Asian people. That would be a great traveler of you to leave too many Mexicans just brutal they got their one language they all look similar race wise and uh but everybody shits on us I'm like we're doing great we got black presidents over here we got uh Asian stuff Chinatown you know i know i sound ignorant but we're we're way more progressive stuff is funny we got asian stuff what chopsticks lanterns sushi rolls uh udon hello kitty but yeah very homogenous much like sweden is very white and blonde this is very

yeah very mexican so. But great place. I would live there. Yeah, for sure. But you think 2023, get the water thing going. What are we doing? Yeah. Your whole country, Flint, Michigan, basically. Yeah, exactly.

That's crazy. Yeah. Good point. But yeah, highly recommend it. And I told my agent, I got recognized a lot there. Oh, that's cool. A lot of we might be drunk. So I was like, Mexico City show, let's do it. Wow.'s on it yeah that could be fun oh hell yeah what kind of hotel were you at uh we got

a place called the park boutique hotel in condesa highly recommend condesa it's right on the park kind of touristy but fuck it you know i. What? And really pretty and cute. The hotels aren't that luxurious, I'll tell you that. Were you- There it is, the blue one. Were you with friends or was it just you two? No, just us. Because you took a picture on the boat. It was with other people.

Oh, she actually had a friend randomly there, so we met up. Oh, that's cool. Yeah, so it was fucking awesome. How do you feel about that when you're in a relationship and she's like, we're meeting my friends. How do you feel about that? It's a little weird, but you're so kind of alone in a foreign country that you're like yeah an american we can talk we can hang out we know each other bring it on vacation friend

vacation friend i saw a comic at soho house this guy tushar i don't know if you know him tall indian guy i haven't seen that guy in eight years we did comedy together in atlanta and then you see when you're like oh we could shit on this and make fun of that and comment on this and that was nice that's a fun photo oh nice yeah they they get a lot of gringo well during the pandemic a lot of people moved a lot of americans moved there and apparently fucked it up but imagine if we did that you know it's uh it's all flipped you know what else is interesting about Mexico? And this is the last thing I'll say. Their Mexicans are Mexican. Meaning you go to Germany and you're like, who's your Mexicans here? And it's like, oh, the Polish.

You know, like who fixes everything? Who does all the work? That's hilarious. And in there, it's just them. Yeah. And the landscaping is beautiful, which I know is a stereotype with Mexicans. But it's fucking great because that's the Mecca. It's like getting a bagel in Israel. You know, it's going to be good. The best workers are the Chinese stereotype with Mexicans, but it's fucking great because that's the Mecca. It's like getting a bagel in Israel.

It's going to be good. The best workers are the Chinese and the Mexicans. Yeah. You know? Or pizza. The Chinese have the great wall. Right. You know, they make nice shit.

Yeah. Well, don't bring the wall here. But yeah. But yeah, no, really cool. Worth going. I'm hung over as shit right there. I'm drinking a Diet Coke, if you can tell. Coke-a-lite, they call it, which you got to learn all this shit.

But my parents- They call it Quarter Pounder down there. Royale with cheese. So yeah. And then, funny, I'm texting you and you're like, I'm in Missouri. I was like, oh, wow, Missouri. We couldn't be in more different places. You know, it made the most of it, though.

I had a great time. And shout out to Chris, who runs the Blue Room. It's like I just booked up clubs that I wanted to go to for the next couple months to tighten up my hour. And it's helping. It's definitely helping. He's running a great club there. He's like the mayor of that town. It's amazing.

Yeah. He just runs everything. And we had a blast, man. Can I ask you a question about your act? Yeah. I know you have your hour almost or you have it. And do you add more stuff to it to see if this could go in or are you just adding more for the special? Good question.

A little bit of both. I'm like, if this fits, cool. If not, I can move something else out. It's almost like you're seeing who's making the team. Yeah. You're like, all right. I feel like this stuff is cooking right now. A lot of the hours, I I could Sweden this part a little.

I could maybe like I have an ending on a couple of stories. One of the stories I'm telling, it's like there's a huge pop, like four minutes into it. And then it goes like probably five and a half, six minutes. And it ends funny. But I'm like, do I do I try to get a better ending at the six minute mark or do i just cut that and end at the four like you're making kind of technical decisions yeah but uh to me this is the like the sweetest most comfortable spot as a stand-up i'm dreading that building oh i'm already thinking of it it's i i just hate it's it's hard it's such a hit to

your self-esteem to just go up there and suck i feel it at the cellar when i'm working out and i can tell when there's people they're excited to see me and i suck and i'm like i gotta work out somewhere it's devastating you know i got i can't i'm not gonna do it if people are seeing me on the road yeah you know and then people who know you go i thought this guy was better than this and that just kills me it's like a girl being like man I heard you're great in bed and you can't get it up and you're like no no I can do this it's a bad night you gotta let me work on it or whatever

I'm working on new dick shit but yeah I'm with you but you have a you have a little runway here I have the longest runway I've had in a long time so I'm trying to enjoy it and you'll probably get a good 20 minutes or at least a solid. As long as I have a good 15 to start with, I'm good.

And then I'll figure out the rest. But I don't want people to see me on the road and I don't have a good 40 at least. Yeah, I feel the same way. It's tough. 40 is the minimum. It's getting tough because you don't want to – Every city you go to, you want to give them a good show. Of course.

Like it's not like I'm going to go – it's tough. I did – every show in Springfield was good except one and I was like, man, they were fucking a little slow. They were a little rude. Every once in a while, you'll like get a crowd where you're like, oh, you don't respect what we do. Yeah. And I could just tell. I was trying – I was fucking killing – like not killing but like doing well enough, I thought. I was throwing my heat.

They weren't loving it. It was going well for like, I don't know, 40 minutes or so. And then I have a chunk there where I'm like, I'm gonna try some new stuff. I said, I'm gonna try some new stuff. I'm going to close strong. You know, I promise. So, you know, I did like probably 10 minutes of new stuff and it's one will hit one wall. And when one missed, uh, I said, you know, I've got to try the new stuff. And he goes, I said something like uh i said you know gotta try the new stuff and he goes i said something like i gotta i gotta try some new stuff he goes yeah we can tell they're new and i'm like i've been throwing you heat yeah i know it's like the second you have like a fucking slip up i'm like people really feel like they can chirp now yeah yeah but i think they know comedy too yeah it was

just one of those things where i was like it's been working every other show in every other fucking city. But like, hey, you're not going to you're not going to bat a thousand. Yeah. You've got to try new shit. I'm not going to, you know, work out in another city. But every once in a while you got to slip it in. Yeah. Yeah, for sure.

That's the only way to test it. Yeah. But do you let them know or do you just quietly. I kind of ignored it. I was kind of like, yeah, you know. Yeah. No, no. I mean, do you let them know or do you just quietly i kind of ignored it i was kind of like yeah you know yeah no no i mean do you let them know you're doing new yeah oh you do sometimes sometimes i'll slip it in to see if it fits a chunk but i will find like a portion i'll block out to do new what do you do uh i kind of i kind of pepper it in because i don't want them to know it's new i want them to treat it as as if it's regular. Right, to see if it'll stand on its own.

Yeah. Problem is, when I do that, sometimes it weakens the other shit. Ah, true, true. I think, like, if it fits, like, I tried that gun joke I told you guys before in another gun bit, so it worked. If I can see an opening for it, I'll put it there. But if not, you know. Yeah, yeah.

It makes you wonder how we've ever built material. And yet we've built so much. It's like we have an opposite problem now back in the day it was like people weren't paying to see us yeah we were working out in a room where people were giving free tickets a lot of the time and you're like all right that's fucking hard right yeah because you got to prove it and then you got to write new shit i know But now it's like now people are paying to see us and there's an expectation. Yeah. And that also presents, I mean, it's way easier than it was,

but there's other challenges. Totally, totally. In the old days, it felt like when you were writing, you had a gun in your back. And if you didn't get a laugh, you got killed. And now it's like, ah, there's no gun. I have a little more leeway to fuck around and try. But I don't envy you with

that new stuff but you got three months yeah i got to build now i got two months you got two months but uh that's something it was it was good though i got another movie rec for you oh please uh our boy ronan kept telling me how good uh the holdovers i loved it i loved. I thought it was great. I mean, Alexander Payne, killer. One of the best writer-directors. Oh, yeah. So good. The wife loved it. I loved it. We showed it to the family.

They loved it. Yeah, it's just like a good, it's like an old school movie. Yeah, yeah. It's like a throwback where it's like- Like a Dead Poets Society kind of thing. But better. I thought it was way better. Really?

Yeah. I don't love, Dead Poets Society is kind of corny, I think. It has good moments. Good moments, but it's not, yeah, Poets Society is kind of corny, I think. It has good moments. Good moments. Yeah, on the whole. Just some corny shit. Yeah. What was that other one with Brendan Fraser?

School Tides. Never saw it. Nazi. What? Is it good? Oh, he would love it. He goes into like a Christian waspy school. Yeah.

Yeah. It's fun. There's some Jew hate. He goes, he goes, well, let's come outside. We'll fight about it. Nobody will fight him. A little off the Jewish stereotype. He's like this big, buff, scary guy who's like, you want to fucking go?

Let's go. Frasier's a Jew? Yeah. Oh, I like that. And somebody put a swastika in his bedroom, and it's a whole thing. It is crazy that he went from being an action star to a kind of heavy dude. Kind of heavy. He's the whale.

I know, but that was fake. A lot of that was fake. Oh, was it? Now he's just- I'm not so sure. Really? No, it was a fat suit, but he's still fat. He's not that big.

Hold on. Hold on. Yeah, he went from like- Well, can you imagine if John Cena was just like, I'm going to be a fat guy now? It would be weird. Of course. It's gradual, but yeah, look at that. It's not that far off.

He could play Dangerfield. Holy shit, you're right. That's insane. You're all right, kid. You're all right. By the way, they're reopening Dangerfield. Did you hear that? I did hear that.

I did hear that. It's a cool room. Good comedy club. Really seems to good. Even his tie's loose, but that might just be the weight. He's fucking great, though. Oh, great actor. Great just be the weight he's fucking great though oh great actor I heard he's a cool dude

my agent's boyfriend is like a hair guy and he works with Gerard Butler and Brendan Fraser and he goes on and on about how they're like the two nicest dudes oh really George and the Jungle I remember that one oh yeah he was hot in that he was fucking ripped and I think he was in The Mummy as well.

Oh, you think? He was carrying an action franchise. I guess so. And Encino Man. Oh, yeah. Don't forget. Flash from the past. He was in some...

Dude, what was the one with Elizabeth Hurley where she was like... Oh, man. When was she hot? God, she was hot. She had a run. Still hot. Still hot. Still looks great.

She's still posting bikini pics in her 50s. Wow. Yeah. Hugh Grant was Still looks great. She's still posting bikini pics in her 50s. Wow. Yeah. Hugh Grant was all in there. Yeah. Hugh Grant, I don't get, but women like him. I don't get it either. He's five years old.

You know why you don't get it? Because it was like the cutesy bumbling. Yeah, yeah. It's like his personality was like he was always rushing home to take a shit. Yeah. And for some reason, women found that charming. He's like, oh, I just got, oh, oh, oh got oh oh oh i shit myself that's true it was something about him that was like the key and also like those chick flicks sucked i mean i'm sorry notting

hill is i know it's a joke but it sucks yeah it actually sucks about a boy's all right that's a great movie yeah and great book nick hornby man hornby killer she's making me hornby but um fucking hot that's crazy that's incredible 57 come on i mean that's defying science that's insane yeah and i see how body positive we are if you're attractive uh yeah well i don it. You know, they say don't objectify, but if she's fat and we're like, hey, she's hot, it's okay to objectify. Funny how that works. It's not consistent. It's not consistent.

Is Kurt Rambis your backdrop? Yeah, he is. Why is Kurt Rambis your backdrop? Kurt Rambis. Look at those arms on that guy. They're like fucking noodles. He was the goon. He was the enforcer.

Oh, really? He was tough. Really? Are you kidding me? No, I don't know. He brought him in like beat up players really he wasn't a skill look at me he was a skill guy he was uh yeah he was on he was like what they brought in to beat up bird and mikhail wow what yeah he was like the uh you know the lakers had like sick – you have skill guys like Magic Johnson and Byron Scott and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. You needed – and then you had like Michael Cooper who was like a tough guy, tough defender. You had him who was like a tough guy and then you had like –

Oh, yeah, Goon. By the way, back to Hugh Grant for a minute. He hooked up with a trans woman, a hooker. She was trans? I thought so. No, I think that was Eddie Murphy I think. Oh hooked up with a trans woman. A hooker. She was trans? I thought so. No, I think that was Eddie Murphy. And it was alleged. I'm not trying to pull an Aaron Rodgers here. I thought it was a double trans.

I'm not trying to pull a Pat McAfee moment. Pull it up. When's that list dropping, by the way? Well, that's what I was getting to. This saved the Tonight Show. This brought the Tonight Show. It wasn't a trans hooker, though. Oh, it wasn't? Do you hear tom arnold's story about this no tom arnold was shooting a movie with him i forgot what movie but the story he would was telling where they were there you know the whole time he was like let's hang out like you know and they became buddies on the movie

and then he was like hugh like let's let's hang and he's like oh you thought we were real friends like we're movie we're film buddies we're like we're shooting a movie together and then he got busted for the hooker thing and it fucked him and he was like are you available and he goes oh we're not real friends oh so he got him back with it oh damn but he just admits it and this this brought the show from like number three to number one for a minute yeah for a minute i think i think for the rest of the run really yeah he's even doing let me start with i'm so uncomfortable i know he's bumbling Yeah. For a minute, I think in perpetuity. Oh, really? Yeah. Let me start with question number one. I know, he's bumbling.

What the hell were you thinking? He's so charming. Even after a hooker. I don't say that to be clear, but I think among most people going, yeah, yeah. Well, it's not easy. You know, the thing is, people give me tons of ideas on this one. I keep reading new, you know, psychological theories and stuff like that. You know, I was under pressure, or I was overtired, or I was lonely, or I fell down the stairs when I was a child, or whatever.

But I think that would be bollocks, really, to hide behind something like that. I think you know in life pretty much what's a good thing to do and what's a bad thing. I did a bad thing and there you have it. Did he though? This is a scandal. You hooked up with a hooker? Is this a scandal? He cheated on his girl. It's public. I didn't know it was a cheat thing.

He was dating Elizabeth Hurley. Why is that my business? Because it's a tabloid story and he's playing a likable leading. That's what it is. He's the cute guy. He has to do this for women. Men are like, yeah, I mean, it's bad, but we don't give a shit.

Men aren't the ones buying to see. Yeah, the inquirer. Unless they're, you know. Yeah. Unless their girlfriend or their wife is like, I want to see the new Hugh Grant movie. And then ladies always say, he had Elizabeth Hurley at home. Why would he get a hooker? And you're like, ah, you don't

get it. It's different. He had a steak at home. Sometimes you go out for takeout Chinese. Yes. Love Chinese. Very good. No, but it was, yeah, I mean, she's ridiculous. She's gorgeous. But you don't know what's going on in people's lives. You don't know, like, is he next to,

who is that next to him? That's the prostitute he hooked up with Oh wow Okay I'm with the women now She's alright Let me see Zoom in Well it's just the opposite

Of Elizabeth Hurley Oh she's not bad Yeah it was zoomed out Yeah That's what it is It's opposite Yeah Oh it sucks that she went down too

Or maybe this helped her career Propped her up a little bit The prostitute I'm the Hugh Grant prostitute Come on He was a leading man Remember that time I nearly ruined his life Yeah 1200 this helped her career propped her up a little bit i'm the hugh grant prostitute come on he was a leading man remember remember that time i nearly ruined his life yeah 1200 it's like that chapelle joke you ever you ever suck someone's dick that's so famous that now you're famous or whatever it

was yeah yeah yeah geez well i better be lewinsky with with all the Clinton allegations going out there. Oh, let me see. Yes. There you go. This is all we had before P. Diddy and R. Kelly and Epstein. This was it. This was the top of the heap for scandals. Here's my question. Okay, here's my question. Clinton, it seems, did, I mean, look, we can all assume he's got questionable judgment at this point.

Sure. We know that. Is Trump in there, there too is my question well they they were definitely buds that's the closest the right and left are going to come to yeah together right trump and uh clinton well flight logs i don't get why this is such a big deal so i feel something different there's well i don't think it's all pedophilia i think it's just they got a ride if 10 years ago he do you want to get on my plane? We're going to Cleveland.

I go, yes. So I think you're conflating two things. Okay. There is the flight logs, which has been released. You can see those. Those are online. Okay. This is the client list.

Oh, client list. Thank you. These are people who he had services for. Oh. So people who got J-O'd in some island somewhere. Got it. That's all I needed. No one has explained that to me yet. There you go. Okay. So like people who got J-O'd in some island somewhere. Got it. That's all I needed. No one has explained that to me yet.

There you go. Okay. I couldn't put that together. All right. Client list, meaning list of people who are paying to hook up with- Massage, yes, yes. Creepy shit. Teenagers.

I mean, yeah. Got it. Okay. Well, this is good. I'm back on board. That's why we want to see the list. All right. Not since Schindler has the list been this exciting.

Two very different lists. Yeah. One good, one bad. Well, hey, we always wanted to be on comedy lists. We're glad we're not on this one. Yeah, we were never on Variety's top 10. No, no. But we're going to see Epstein's top 10, hopefully.

It's crazy to think about. I mean, we had Louis Black on here talking about. He had told an amazing story about going to Epstein's place like 20 years ago. Oh, yeah. I don't know who the fuck he was. Just some rich financier who liked comedy. Yeah. By the way, I ran into Bobby Slayton in LA.

What? The Pitbull? Yeah, and Bobby Slayton goes, I don't know him, but he came over to me. He goes, I saw that story, a true story. He was a very nice guy. Whoa. Wow.

Power of the internet. Yeah. Got to Slayton. I didn't even know he had Wi-Fi. It's nice to see people confirming Epstein stories. I saw your tweet today, but I didn't watch it.

The Epstein's pilot. What is that joke? I don't remember how it goes. It's like an old bit. Oh. Do you want me to look it up? Sure joke I don't remember how it goes yeah I can't it's like an old bed oh yeah yeah sure I don't remember how it goes but oh that's you posted the you getting in the Epstein this top oh yeah I was taught I have a guy running my shit so it's like no it's higher up than that it should be that here, right? It should be. That's the letterman. Maybe I pulled it? I don't know. Uh-oh. Whoa, what's up with that car?

Sorry, I don't look at Twitter too much. These are old ones, dude. Oh, okay. I thought that was. That's like an old one. Well, I got a big shout out while we're talking about stand-up to Sam Talent. Put out a new special. I hear he's really funny.

Oh, dude. Did you watch it? It's so funny. Yeah, I watched it. It's hilarious. It's quick i mean talk about punchy just boom boom boom he's murdering he's murdering in like minute negative he's burning like 30 seconds just out of the gate and it's so fun and well shot and uh i hope i hope

this blows him up because he's one of those guys that's like way overdue maybe maybe if he's in if he's in town we could have him on i'd love to i'm a total cunt because i typed in samuel twitter and this is x of course so if you type in samuel it takes you back two years how about that one of one of his quotes one of the pilots quotes was uh he goes every uh underage person i saw on the plane was with either a parent or an adult i was like those are those are two pretty different things if i showed up to a playground and like is that your son i'm like it's a kid let's not go into detail here that's good yeah good joke. Yeah, it's hard to write Epstein jokes, I feel like. They're just...

Yeah. It's like such a dark premise. No one wants to... You got to find like another angle in. Right, right. Yeah, man. I mean, it's like this guy's staying in the news forever. It's like the getting caught, the suicide.

Right. Jelaine Maxwell. I know. The list. And there was a James Patterson book about him before this. James Patterson, the writer, was his neighbor in Florida. What? He hated his guts because he knew this shit early.

So we wrote like a takedown book of him before any of this. Whoa. It's crazy. Bill Gates said, or Bill Gates' wife said when she met him, she was like, this is the scariest guy I've ever met. Like she just felt it immediately, like evil personified. Damn. And then she's like, my husband's hanging out with this guy and now they're divorced.

So there you go. Damn. I wonder if Bill Gates is on that list. I mean, I. Oh, I guarantee he's on there. On the client list? I'm going to go. Yes.

Throw it out there. Why not? I'm not an IBM guy. Cut to our studio being shut down. I'm an Apple man.. Cut to our studio being shut down due to a lawsuit. I'm an Apple man. I don't use Microsoft. But yeah.

Yeah, that's it. That's the book. There you go. And he had a couple docs out. What's she's laying up to? She's in prison. Oh, she is? On her heels, yeah.

Oh, she got 20 years. That's right. Wow. That is tough. I wonder in like 10 more years that we'll get the killer because shit just kind of tends to come out in the wash him yeah yeah that's like i'm not a huge conspiracy theory guy but that's one where i'm like cameras weren't working cameras aren't working all of a sudden the guard fell asleep it's like yeah come on that's like out of a bad movie. Right. Right. You see the car like dozed off. You're like, yes. Exactly.

So we'll see what happens. Because I'm with you. I think I think this is one of the things we were like, it's going to keep unfolding. It is crazy. Bill Clinton is a is a bad person. Poon Hound. Pull up the Norman Donald. Good for sure.

But he also is clearly a bad person. He seemed like a cool guy. Saxophone. I tried marijuana once. I did not have bad person. Well, he seemed like a cool guy, saxophone. I tried marijuana once. I did not have sexual. I mean, he was entertaining. He was smooth as fuck. So smooth.

Little Rock, Arkansas, baby. Well, those were like those old school Democrats who could connect with the South. Yes. You know. He was also against abortion and gay marriage, but it was the 90s. Oh, yeah, in the 90s, that would probably be. This is it. Oh, yeah, in the 90s, that would probably be... This is it. It's a little long,

but if you can find it, Norm comes out of the gate and he talks about how Bill Gates killed a guy, or Bill Clinton killed a guy. Yeah, it's funny. I've seen this. It's funny how much

the view has changed. They're like, easy, Norm, you can't say things like that. And now the view's awful. Yeah, but I still think they wouldn't say shit like that. And now the view is awful. Yeah, but I still think they won social. Maybe.

Oh, yeah. Oh, this is great. Steal the election from the winner, you know, but who knows? They hate him. You love George Bush. I love George Bush, man.

He's a good man, decent. You know, none of this. I love George Bush. I love George Bush, man. He's a good man, decent. You know, none of this. I love George Bush. He's, you know, a liar, a crook murderer, or anything like that. Oh, shit. See, I think we should get

the homicide out of the White House. Oh, here it goes. Like a fresh start, because we don't want any more murderers. I think we should just go on to the next question. Oh, here it goes. We got like a fresh start because we don't want any more murderers. I think we should just go on to the next question. Did George Bush

never murder anyone? His dad was like a war criminal. Not criminal, but war hero. Good job. Oh, Clinton, he murdered a guy. You know what? You're not going to

put on no more accusations with that. That's a little too far. Yeah. They were pretty hot and heavy. Who's that? Norman L. McPh little too far. Yeah. They were pretty hot and heavy. Who's that? Norm and Elle McPherson. What? Yeah. I remember he was on Howard Stern. This is going to make Norm sound

bad, but he was on Howard Stern and he's like, all these women were calling in like, Norm's so hot and Howard Stern's like, all these models want to date you. And he goes, well, I don't want to talk to them. He's like, we could just have sex. That'd be great, but I don't want to hang out and get dinner. And I remember being a kid like, oh, this guy's awesome.

But yeah. Yeah, I'll do a bad person. He must have some serious riz. He also died alone in the studio apartment with his mom. Who? Norm. No, he didn't. Yeah, yeah.

Well, he died of cancer, but he lived in a studio apartment in LA. But he liked it. I mean, that's how he he wanted to live and he's got a son he likes there we go oh no yeah no one was great i mean uh shit dude yeah talking to models it's tough it's rough and i'm sure women have that with like they think this rich guy is super sexy but i'm sure he's a fucking wet blanket as well you know i don't want to talk to some zillionaire guy who's not that interesting if you're dating someone for one reason yeah that's the way the reasons are gonna bum you out better way to put it i went on a couple dates with models like single phase just like using riot swiping and shit and holy shit man they were they were tough oh yeah i've seeing this girl walking out like man she's like gorgeous and then we were talking i was like oof yeah it's just not

it's not gonna go anywhere i mean i can make you know we're entertainers we could like kind of be silly and turn it on whatever but at a certain point you're kind of like yeah i don't think this is gonna be good it's a ball against a curtain you can't go on it's it's not gonna work out and men get mad at women they're like i saw a woman posted something like i won't date a guy unless he's got this much in his bank account and all these men are like you're so fucking shallow and you're like well we're the same way with looks that's just what they like right so like you can't really knock them but you know it's gotta be hard to date and have a conversation and connect on either front.

I love Attell's bit about, I saw a girl say, you know, 10 inches or don't even message me or whatever. And he goes, oh, you need enough to shut down a school. Come on. That's fucking cool. We got to have Attell on here soon because he's got a special coming out. Oh, finally. I know he hates doing podcasts, but this will wake her up there you go what is that some heroin a little fentanyl there see a mark uh you're on vacation you have any new

bit ideas while you were there i got a ton of ideas and i got some peeves oh give me both well let me do a peeve first because we usually end on the bits um the lady does this one and other people have done it but she was doing it all trip what is that chocolate yeah she loves chocolate no it kills a dog oh my god you scared me there dog treat i know you're a new dog owner i didn't know you knew about the chocolate thing yeah i'd like to start with a 16 yearyear-old dog. She might be 17 now, dude. She's fucking old. Well, she's on the client list. 17.

An older lady came up to me on the street, like very old, and she goes, oh, she's so old. I hope I make it to that age. I'm like, you won't. She's fucking 17 and you'll be long dead. Wait, what is 17 and dog? 17 times 7? I can't even.

Yeah, I can't either. This is how it was in Mexico with the pesos. I was like, ah, just take it. Take it all. What is 17 times 7? Working it out. 17 times 7. It should be like 105 or something.

One-ninth. Hey, there you go. Jesus Christ. That's fucking old. Better than I had. All right. What's your peeve? Okay, one peeve is uh when you get mad

at somebody for not doing something and they just scream that they're actually doing it you know like uh she was doing a thing i can't remember what she was doing and i go hey hey uh oh what was it shit hold on oh i was like uh grab the remote and throw it to me. And she just wasn't listening. She was in her phone. And I was like, hey, you're not listening. Grab the phone, grab the remote and throw it to me. And she's like, I am. And then she threw the remote to me.

And I'm like, well, it's been four minutes of me going, throw me the remote. And you can't just say I am when you're not doing it. It's like, hey. What is that? Why do people do that? I don't know. It's weird. I'm like, hey, you got to, hey, can you answer me?

Or like, hey, oh, this is a big one when you go, we got to leave right now. We got to leave. And like, I'm leaving. But you're not. You're just doing other stuff. I once dated a girl who – it was like right when I signed with William Morris and I was in L.A. And they were like, you want to go to the Lakers game tonight? And I was like, fuck yeah.

Yeah. And then she's literally getting ready for so long it was like it's like a bad it's like a bad sitcom where i'm like women it's the first quarter's over right like the second quarter i'm like thanks exactly glad you got your fucking uh mascara on yeah we missed kobe's last fucking season oh yeah right yeah that was it she wasn't i was like asking her a question she wasn't talking to me. And I was like, hey, why aren't you talking to me? She goes, I am talking.

I was like, but you're not. That's why I brought it up. Yeah, they're just, they're lying to you. They're lying. Weird. But I'm like, I have proof that you didn't because that's why I asked you to do it. You know? Yeah, that's gaslighting.

It's gaslighting. But in their mind. That is a definition. Everyone misuses gaslighting. But that is like, that's gaslighting. I guess so. But she's even convinced she's like no no i'm talking i'm talking right now i'm like but you weren't what

you know so that that's annoying and then the other one is these garbage cans in new york drive me crazy pull it up sally oh you couldn't find it what oh which kind is it the country the poll one i hate the poll i hate the poll i'm not even a germaphobe but i'm like i don't want to touch this nasty fucking handle well for, it's not even that. It's the NYC something or other. Hold on. I'll see if I can find one here. They're all in Midtown.

Damn. I don't see it. The pole one. I hate the pole ones. Maybe there's- Why do you hate them? I hate them because I always have like a pile of garbage in my hand, and then you got to get a claw out, pull it, and then it doesn't fit because the pole thing is so long.

Why do you always have a pile of garbage? Well, you got like a big to-go thing. You don't have a shoe in your building? I'm on the street. I'm eating a pizza box. That's it. That motherfucker right there. Those suck.

At least they got a kickstand on that one. Yeah. But those drive me crazy because there's like five inches Of plastic before it actually gets to the hole And they seem more difficult And more expensive than the classics Yeah yeah yeah We just sound like old dudes Things were better when I was young

I'm gonna shoot a video of me Holding a Chick-fil-A bag that's this big And I'm gonna pull it out and put it in And it never fits It's a fucking mess Alright you gotta peeve I gotta peeve It's big. And I'm going to pull it out and put it in. It never fits. It's a fucking mess. All right. You got a peeve?

I got a peeve. I got one when you ever have someone where you're texting and they're like, call me right now. Oh, I hate that. And you're like, oh, I... And then you call them. You're like, I called them. And then they just ask you one thing. I'm like, well, you could have just texted that one thing.

Right. You know? That's crazy. This is this is about pam lo shack by the way every time famous new york call me right now all right then she's like can you do this show tomorrow ah yeah you can text her that right okay you ready for a bit oh can i do a quick piece well? Oh, please. This is my impression of Pam. Call me right now. Okay, what's up, Pam? She goes, Dr. Drew is on hiatus. You couldn't text that?

Wow. I didn't ask about it. You brought it up. 9-11, I'll give you. Call me right now. This plane's going into a building. Holy shit, that's insane. But Dr. Drew is on hiatus

the hiatus is the definition of time off we have plenty of time we can figure this out what do you have by the way sorry oh it's when you're in a bar situation and you have like a funny line like you just said uh that's why he's on the client list like something like that and someone's like did you just come up with that? It's like, no, no, I fucking wrote that. That's a good one. That's a good one. I hate that. No, I've been workshopping, hoping I could slide in a comment that you would maybe say.

Yeah. Of course. That's insane. I knew the scenario would play out exactly like this. Yeah, no, I write schtick like this is Carson in the 80s for our hangouts. Jesus Christ. By the wayete holmes was on panel on a kimmel i don't know love him or hate him he killed it it was really like a like a oh this guy's a panel guy oh it's hard to kill panel panels the whole different animal a whole different

panel but yeah uh see this this is my peeve in pam language call me right now i am calling but you're not you're not calling we're texting that's that's the point yeah if you can text i am calling you're not calling exactly i don't like uh like a sense of urgency when it's not called for basically also the person who will like send you 14 texts and you haven't responded to one yet let me catch my breath and read the other 14 i know i know exactly especially when you're not in a conversation at the time. I understand if you're talking, someone's like going, going. Right.

But if it's just out of nowhere and they just keep going, you're like, all right, this is a lot. That's too much. You got to relax. Because they just text as they talk, you know, and you're like, well, I got to read all this. Oh, how about the voice memo people? Oh, Sally. Guilty.

Are you a voice memo person? I feel like it's an LA thing because they're driving and they're like, I'll just leave a voice memo. Yeah.ally guilty memo person la thing because they're driving they're like i'll just leave a voice memo yeah you're like cool it's been three minutes but sometimes it needs inflection sometimes when you leave a text it's like this is flat it sounds like a voice memo defender right here he is i am i'm an apologist you're an apologist if we're editing something and you text like line three's gotta go where, blah, blah, it is a lot to write. I get that. That's fine.

Line three's got to go. Yeah. It's easy. Some people will just go for like three minutes. That's the problem. That's the problem. It's like a voicemail where they're like, oh, is there anything else I need to say? And you're like, come on.

I get that some people don't like looking at their phone, but like, you know, it's a lot. Yeah. You know what the voicemail thing needs? It needs the old answering machine like, you're out of tape. Yeah. at their phone but like you know it's it's a lot yeah you know what the voicemail thing needs it needs the the old answering machine like cuts you off you're out of tape yeah that's good how about people um when you're talking to them on the phone and they're at the fucking deli ordering oh you're like in the middle of conversation like hold on i'll take the chopped cheese it's like why am i on the phone with you while you're ordering a chop cheese? You know who did that this morning? Who I saw

pull that? Pam LoShack. Alec Baldwin. Whoa! I'm at my corner store. At least he put the phone down for the order and then walked to the corner. Wow. I was like, who is this husky big guy? And I was like, oh shit, Alec Baldwin. Good hair. Beautiful white

silver fox hair. And he there was a moment where uh he's like one of those old school stars where i feel like if you say if you talk shit to him he'll like he'll like drop his phone and be like this yeah yeah some guy on the way out was like i love you and he goes thank you so much it's just like he's one of those like all or nothing like i feel like he's very debonair if you're if you're if you're nice to him he's just like very you know very like civilized but if you mean he's like got that long island and he wants to fucking take your head off right yeah for sure and uh there's a video of him at the shooting range all right he turns around he's like i think i got it

all right is this this just tell me this has been done and I'll throw it in the garbage and take a shit on the trash and light it on fire. Not one of those trashes. No. I saw a little girl in Mexico, like a five-year-old girl, and she had the dolly, you know, as they do. So the mom had a baby in a stroller and she had a doll baby in a doll stroller and they're both going. I was like, oh, that's cute. She's like mimicking the mom but boys don't do that you never see a boy with a briefcase a pipe and like a bottle of whiskey and a handgun and hitting a fake wife that's funny i mean i'm going hard with it but i'm just saying kids do a fake gun so it's good

you have like a gun and shit but like that was the turn the only thing you have like your dad is a gun but yeah yeah or like uh something what other shit kids have that could be funny like what's a dad women growing up would have like an easy bake oven exactly they got a little kitchenette they got up there playing house they got a dollhouse what's funny because they'd be like well that's like outdated and you're like well these kids playing cowboys and Indians. That's really outdated. Oh, true. True. Yeah. I'm trying to think of like other.

Yeah. What's a dad thing? A suit. You know. A kid's holding a fake newspaper. Right. Right. He's a.

Fake coffee. Yeah. He's a. Like the girls walk around with a doll. You know. You know what could be a funny angle is like the shit that boys do like women like your goals as a kid are on it they're attainable like having a kid is you could have that kids are wearing like sports jerseys i'm like you're not gonna play for the thunder oh

that's a good angle that's a good angle yeah true i guess kid could play sports though you could play so i'm not gonna go pro that's They're not going to go pro. That's true. What else do kids do for, like, fantasy? Yeah. You have a kid. Help us out here. Yeah, man, I don't know. Because boys go, they go to the moon. You don't know you've been getting drunk with us every week.

He's not allowed near him. But boys go, we go superhero, G.I. Joe, baseball. Like, it's bigger. Where this girl is like i want a fucking baby doll yeah you know it's kind of a little more grounded yeah hmm you want a baby it's like that's it's also like a weird it's such a weird thing like we tell women they could be whatever they want and then what do we get them as kids we get them dolls like a baby doll but what if she wanted the baby doll that's That's the other weird part.

It's like, oh, these kids have an Easy Bake Oven, but she asked for it. What are you going to get a girl? Gloria Steinem book? She's four years old. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. There's a lot here, I think. It's an interesting idea, but I don't know where to go with it.

The Jersey thing's not bad. Something about, like, if you're a kid, you're, if you're – what else do girls – like little girls play with it? I'm trying to think. So can you do the premise again? Just do it from the top? I saw a girl, like a five-year-old girl next to her mom. The mom had a baby, a real baby and a stroller with a baby in it. And the girl had a fake stroller with a doll baby in it.

And I was like, this is weird that you want to, this is the toy you want. You want to be like your mom, I guess. This is fun for you. And then Easy Big Oven, like playing house. They literally play house with teacups and shit. But a boy doesn't mimic the dad. Yeah, he's not doing taxes.

Yeah, yeah. Taxes is funny. But they do, there are a lot, you have to find the perfect angle because they do mimic the dad in a lot of ways, right? Like they'll have a fake little toy truck or something, you know? Oh, yeah, the truck. So there's stuff, you have to find the perfect angle.

Like tax is a funny angle. Yeah, tax is good. They're not doing like- Something a kid would never do. The angle has to be like, they're not doing the difficult stuff a father has to do. Right, because motherhood is a difficult fucking job. Yeah. You're mimicking my pain almost.

Yeah, yeah. You're mocking me with this shit. And this kid was an accident. You know, maybe. But the doll was bought on purpose. No kid's like, oh. Hey, maybe that's something. Maybe no kid's like, oh, I had a doll on accident.

What the fuck? Maybe the animal. They're putting it in a fake dumpster. New York City garbage can. Yeah yeah they're hard to open you don't see like the boy doing shit his dad has to do yes yes or he's just like that's enough or something like that with the mom or like uh i don't know yeah because the mom will hire someone to watch the kids you know it's almost like get this thing away from me and but the girl wants the doll maybe it's almost like, get this thing away from me. But the girl wants the doll.

Maybe that's the beauty of the doll is it doesn't do all the shit that babies do. Yeah. Maybe the kid has a race car bed, but the dad doesn't have a race car. You're teaching the kids to be like, you're teaching the girls to be nurturing with these dolls. And like, we don't teach the boys. It's interesting. It's like, you don't teach. Yeah, that's why I think there's something here. Because look, it's a real brain twister it's getting things are bubbling here but uh yeah maybe the angle is like she's gonna grow up to be a mother then you see the kid with

like a toy gun and you're like man i hope he doesn't get bullied oh yeah i don't know right right i don't know the angle yet but it's target rich i mean there's something here it's rich okay i just gotta till that soil till i find a seed all right what do you see what i got hold on i gotta look for a sec um this one's gonna take some precision gotta figure out exactly what i'm trying to say i got a lot of angles that i don't think are there yet hey join the club is this something my girlfriend asked me she's like do you want to have sex with other people and i was like of course you know and she was i was like don't you and she said no but i said but you find you say you find guys attractive all the time she goes yeah but i don't want to

have sex with them i was like well that to me is weird that's like i see a movie poster that looks good i want to see it i'm not like oh that looks great you know for another man to enjoy oh yeah you know that's good yeah that's great he should enjoy he should feel pleasure from the i don't know something there well the problem with the movie thing is with sex is an attachment and emotional there's not really an attachment and emotional with a movie i like the holdovers it's a tear it made you cry both of you guys are crying yeah yeah yeah because you think the sex thing is like too much like yeah although i'll tell you this you think it's not emotional or an attachment you ever watching a show with your partner

and you go ahead they're pissed oh yeah good point interesting if you think that's not masturbating you didn't wait for me that's that is masturbating yeah you didn't save the nut for me right right yeah you didn't finish you finish without me finish without me yeah that's a lounge song i'm working on by the way save the last nut for me uh yeah you finish without me is something for sure do you remember phil hanley's line from his last special when he's like um my girlfriend wants me she's like do you jerk off to me and he's like babe you know monogamy is my kink very relatable that's funny louis had a joke about that his was a lot rougher he's like what are you fucking high i can think of anything i got fucking gnomes

blowing me and eating my ass. You know, whatever. That was a Louie bit. I've rewatched some Louie. You can just buy it on his website. Fucking great purchase. You get all five seasons for $30. And it's killer, dude.

It's just so good. Well, it's just no committee. It's just his fucked up brain. Did you see that Rick Rubin clip that's going around? What is that? I might have said it to you. Maybe not. It's about don't up brain. Did you see that Rick Rubin clip that's going around? What is that? I might have said it to you. Maybe not. It's about don't do art for the audience.

You got to do it a little for the audience. That's what I think. That's the interesting thing. It's like, okay, you're in a different field than us, Rick Rubin. Like, you know, all due respect. Only advice I have. And he's not even an artist. Well, he makes stuff.

He produces art. But, yeah, but I think the difference is. He's like a Don artist. Well, he makes stuff. He produces art. But yeah, but I think the difference is. He's like a Don King. Yeah, I mean. He's the white Don King. Except the hair's on the other end. But you know, with us especially, we focus group. That's true.

Stand-up's different in that way. Stand-up's different. Go ahead, though. To anyone, and to do what you love, and to make things that you love whatever it is this is your favorite things be the audience you be the audience make the thing put a diary entry that was his big angle he's like i think to some degrees right i mean i agree with it a little bit where it's like yeah make what you would want to see i mean that's we fucking wrote a movie together it's a movie we would want to see right true true yeah i think that's it with the yeah with the glass any of these metrics of which is

better like the idea of the oscar god damn it went viral that's the only reason i bring it up but it it brought a lot of thoughts into my head and that's why i bring it up to you because i want to hear your take basically saying don't do art for the audience that's basically what marvel is doing it's just like explosions and superheroes and fun and it's not art it's just like hey this is catered to you quick easy done you leave he's like art should be like a diary entry you show people and don't worry about what they think. But ironically, if you open up enough, they will like it more than they like the Marvel movie. That was the big takeaway. Yes and no.

Right. Like a diary entry. To me, that feels like the comics who are like, this is my therapy. And I'm like, cool. Where's the joke? I think there's a middle ground where you can make it personal, but also make it for the audience. Like make it you, but make it. I mean, that's what we're doing with jokes, right?

This is our life and this is our perspective, but it's always going to be that. As long as you like stay, as long as you stay unpretentious with your comedy and you remember like, I'm doing this for laughs. I'm not doing this to make a point or to pander. I mean, the type of shit where people are like, this should be a diary entry. Diary entries aren't funny. I mean, unless you're like, I got finger fucked by my dad you're like holy shit this is crazy my favorite part of the frank book yeah but they're not it's not great entertainment no i mean that's that's one chapter

out of the diary not one chapter one snippet it's not the full book the full book is like i went to school today and i talked to tommy and cute. And oh, boy, I got excited. And then, oh, I got a tummy ache. That ain't good art. I agree. That being said, there is like a type of movie where it like feels where the dialogue feels very real. Yeah. Right.

And that is like a genre where you're like, OK, well, this isn't like a movie where the dialogue is meant to be snappy. This is meant to be truthful. And that's fine. That's cool. Yes. I feel like Noah Baumb to be truthful. And that's fine. That's cool. Yes. I feel like Noah Baumbach will make movies like that. Oh, yeah. Right?

Where it's like this is supposed to feel real. There's a movie called Columbus a few years ago. That was another good with John Cho. And I forgot the actress's name. She's really good. But there's movies like that where the point is to be real. But it's still got to be good. It's like you said. You need a middle ground. It's like Barbie. Barbie is to be real. But it's still got to be good. It's like you said, you need a middle ground.

It's like Barbie. Barbie's a perfect example. I don't know how good it was, but it's huge numbers. People love it. It's blowing up. It's number one on HBO now. It was number one in the theater. It made more money than any movie in the last couple years, whatever.

But it's Greta Gerwig and then Noah Baumbach wrote it together, but they wrote it to be a little more mainstream. And they're very kind of alt-y, indie directors. And they wrote it. They met in the middle. They wrote it to be mainstream. But you have their talents, but still channeling it through this kind of mainstream vehicle. And I think that's why it's so good or so big. Big.

I didn't like it personally. I know I'm probably not the target demo for that sure but like it looked beautiful there's a lot of cool things about it but like it just i didn't think it was funny or witty to be honest yeah i didn't just like it was that funny i thought i had moments of like oh that's a clever turn and that's that's an interesting uh look on that but uh i'm with you but i'm just saying like i think you got to meet in the middle yeah i mean look that was like for the masses that's what it was yes and that's and that's fine if that's what you're trying to make right like it would be weird if they made like an indie barbie film you know that would

be weird too right god that would be weird she's a cutter you know she's cutting plastic and it won't bleed winona rider yeah uh yeah no it's uh i don't know man it's uh, I don't know, man. It's a. Lena Dunham as Barbie. She's all fat and tatted up. Yeah. All right. I mean. But I think that's a good bit. Yeah, I do think you need, you need it to be you or else it's not going to have an original

spin on it. But like, I've seen the comics that are like, this is my diary entry and I want to fucking leave the room. I know. I know. It's not funny. I'm with you. We watched that shit. I've seen the comics that are like, this is my diary entry and I want to fucking leave the room. I know. I know. It's not funny. I'm with you.

We watched that shit. Like, we came up in that alt boom. Yes. And we saw those guys kind of blow up. I was like, I don't think this motherfucker can play Idaho. Oh, God, no. You know, like, I don't think this person can play America. I think you're killing in Brooklyn.

Yeah. But it's not. And it's cool that, like, you know, the guys. But it's not, and it's cool that like, you know, the guys coming up that we liked, like Louie were like, or I thought they could kill any of them. Anywhere.

A funny joke's a funny joke and it doesn't have to be this heartfelt, open, vulnerable thing. And that's great. But that can be done well. That can be done well, but.

There's a skill in that as well, but. It's still called comedy. Yeah. And what comedy means, funny jokes, laughs, and they're, no one's laughing. So like, like what are we doing here but there are a lot of different types of comedies and there's a lot of different you know it's like you can make a heartfelt comedy

and yeah or you can make like a punchy comedy a dirty comedy there's so much type of shit you can make you know yeah but i think if you're standing in front of an audience that paid to see you in cleveland they gotta be entertained or laughing or you're you're failing in front of an audience that paid to see you in cleveland they gotta be entertained or laughing or you're you're failing does rick rubin create music or is he a producer i mean what is he a producer i saw an interview with him it was 60 minutes he was like i can't play an instrument he goes i just know what i like and he's barefoot i can find that for you and he's got a beard i just know what i like uh not shaving yeah yeah exactly and shoes i hate shoes hate shoes.

I hate shoes. No, I think there's obviously a skill in that. There's a skill in being a great producer. But also, it is weird when people that aren't creators are like, this is how you create. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because you're an observer of creating. Like, you know, you work with like the BC boys. And who else did he work with?

I mean, he's got an amazing voice. Oh, all these rappers. Jay-Z. There's an amazing video of him like working out a song with Jay-Z. Tom Petty. Oh, all these rappers. Jay-Z. There's an amazing video of him working out a song with Jay-Z. Tom Petty. Oh, 99 Problems. He was like, we should do acapella in the beginning. You know the song?

Sure, yeah. 99 Problems. Jay-Z originally said it should be 101 Problems, and he was like, no, it should be 99. Guru. All right. I'm not saying he doesn't know his stuff, but I do think if he didn't look like that, nobody would listen to him. Yeah.

I think if he had a suit on and a part in his hair, I think no one would give a fuck. And I think he knows that. But. Don't play it. Don't play it. Everybody knows 99 Problems. All right. But the point is.

At least you asked if I knew that song. Hey, do you know the movie Oppenheimer? I've heard of it. Rick Rubin produced that. Did he? No, I'm joking. I mean, you never know. You never know.

These fucking movies. He's got his hand in everything. And I think now it's good to have his name on shit. Like he's gone that far where he's like this legend status. And I'm not saying he doesn't know his shit. I'm just saying I don't think he understands all of it. He still needs the artist. He couldn't make something on his own.

It's one thing to be able to listen to an artist and be like, change that, change this, change that. I'm a genius. Yeah, but you couldn't have done it without them. But also being able to pull something out of somebody is a magical trait and what a producer does in music at least. And I think he does that really well no there are legendary producers and i and i've been around producers where i'm like i i've seen i see that or yeah they have a definite talent but uh yeah i don't know but there's also a lot of producers who stink and leech and leech on the fucking people more talented than them and

then try to fuck them over yeah there's definitely that there's a lot to me this is kind of like when a lady says like i love funny guys and you're like yeah but you're not blowing uh chris farley you know i hope not now well yeah that'd be a dirty bad blowjob dirty bony blowjob but i'm just saying like yeah you do love funny guys as long as they're six one rich and fit like this homeless guy could be hilarious and like i'm being extreme here i'm generalizing you put your money where your mouth is suck off that homeless guy but the the thing of like hey it's got to be a diary entry and it's like yeah yeah but there's there are diary entries that are super boring and and uh there's nothing there so like you can't

just say that and have it be the end all be all we're fighting the indulgence of a diary entry that's like i think what bothers us is that like someone like you you're honing your shit yeah you're taking so much care in it you're like kind of like searching i've watched you for years i've watched mark for so long like trying to figure out bits and i think when he says that i think mark is his reaction i get angry you're annoyed because you're annoyed no it's more than that yeah it's more than a fucking diary entry is like stream of consciousness it's self-indulgent right and it's like okay done it took eight minutes yeah i think i think uh there's no fine-tuning i think we're reading into it look that any quote you're gonna read into it

the way you read into it but i But I feel the same way as you. All right. I appreciate it. But that's why I brought it up because I think it sparks a good debate. It's like when you guys say in comedy, it's like, that was your first thought. You got to get past that. Yeah. Get past the first thought.

Go to your second or third. That's why you write a screenplay eight times because it keeps getting better and better. I mean, sometimes you get overwrite. But yeah, I think with this, the diary entry thing, you're like, it's still Richard richard pryor is so honest that's why he's great he's honest yeah but he's also fucking hilarious i know so we can't just go oh he lit his hair on fire i can't just go out and go hey i lit my hair on fire honesty is not funny it's not funny i have aids i guess that is funny okay honesty is funny, honesty is funny. I take it back. Honesty is good.

I remember Jim Norton had the great point of someone called in to Jim and Sam when he made a fat joke or something, and somebody was like, you think fat people are funny? And he's like, well, no, I made it funny. If I see a 700-pound guy on the street, I'm like, that's hilarious.

Same with Seinfeldfeld a toothbrush isn't funny but he made it funny right right and i'm like that's a great point inherently funny nothing's inherently funny and a diary entry isn't inherently interesting so it's still got to be good i think that's the problem with a lot of these podcasts now is that people are speaking in absolutes yes and you know you're like this is this is a secret sauce right here. Right. It's not interesting. There is no secret sauce. Right. Figure out for yourself.

This is a trial and error pursuit. I mean, you're going on stage and you slip and you fall on your face. You're like, that one's not funny. Yeah. Then you go to the next one. See if you slip and fall. There's no secret to this. There's no secret.

And here's what I want Rick Rubin to do. If we're really where the rubber meets the road. He links up with Tom Petty. Hey Tom Petty I'm Rick Rubin. I'm a legend. I have no shoes on. Let me come over and work with you and we'll do a new album. I'll be Tom Petty. No dice dude.

You gotta wear shoes to my place. No shoes no service. Alright. But my point is take Salicus who's never written a comedy hour in his life and go well you're actually kind of funny so let me like let's take salicus and go you're gonna be a model next male model yeah that's hurtful that to me would be like oh shit this guy is fucking talented he can take the ugliest man in new york he can take this guy and make him the next big thing sorry but you know what i'm saying he's gonna make you an nba star you know or whatever

like that that would be like okay rick rubin is a fucking genius he took this guy and made him play for the knicks that's you yeah look up some footage this dude was a fuck pull up kurt rambis this guy was a fucking goon he's an nba champion dude yeah he was a bad motherfucker he was a terrible front office guy for the knicks but uh by the way the knicks just made a move for og on an obi dude i'm fucking hyped who's that this guy we got from toronto we had to trade rg rj barrett and emmanuel quickly it's tough to see the young guy you love go. Yeah, Barrett was doing well. And Quickly was looking great.

But this guy, O.G. Ananobi, he's like a game changer. He's like a shutdown defender. I'm fucking hyped. Well, we thought that about Zion when we got him on the Pelicans, and that didn't change much. Oh, that was a nasty fall. They hated each other. The Celtics. Maybe that is you, Sal.

He looks like Howard Stern. What's going on here? He's tall as shit, huh? He's big. He's like 6'7", probably 6'8". Wow. Was he out of Philly? Boston?

No, Lakers, right there. But I mean, where'd he from? Oh, I don't know. He was a tough guy, though, for sure. I mean, like. Oh, is that him now? Yeah. Oh, wow.

He's hanging in there. Yeah, he was. I think he was the next coach for a minute. Maybe he was definitely assisting. What? He was a terrible coach. Where the hell is that? Oh, a lot of Indiana boys.

He's got a good white guy. Who's this, baby? Larry Bird, bird right french lick yeah i mean uh fuck larry bird was so cold man oh so cool i'm not even the biggest nba guy i've watched montages of larry bird just because all the guys are like you watch these uh johnson uh michael jordan i was like, Larry Bird was a problem. He was crazy. I mean, NBA would not be the NBA without Larry Bird and Magic Johnson because they're beef. Like, you need a rivalry. You need people to care. You need drama.

And they fucking hated each other. And then they became boys. It's awesome. Great NBA story. Great documentary on them on HBO. I forgot the name of it. Oh, really? Yeah, it's a great doc on Bird and Magic. mean yeah look at that shit wow he's just crushing dudes he's kind of

innovative oh look at that look at behind the back dude he was so good and he could dunk he did everything oh he's breaking ankles you ever heard the story about what he said when he walked up to everybody at the three-point contest and he goes which one of y'all is it coming in second? Oh. Damn, he was fucking money. I mean, Boston needed this guy. Oh, yeah. A tall, blonde, white guy.

There's the other story about him, and I don't know if it's true, but it's one of those legendary stories about him rolling into a bar in Boston. They're like, Larry, don't you have a big game tomorrow? And he goes, why don't you let Larry Bird worry about Larry Bird? Ooh-wee! I heard the story about Satchel Paige where he would get the ball in the mound and he would look at the opposing bench and he'd be like, all right, who wants to hit today?

And if you spoke up, you actually got the hit that day. Oh, really? Yeah. Which is, is that Woody Allen's kid? No. No, no, he's got a kid named Satchel. That turned into Ronan Farrow. What?

He changed his name? No, Satchel is the girl. What's her name? Oh, is that the girl? Okay. Damn, these shots are stupid. Dylan. You know what Bird used to do?

He used to tell the player, guard him where he was going and still hit the shot. Wow. You see, I'm going right here. Just so you know, just as an extra layer of talking shit. Wow other team is fucking they're dying that's like that meme where they go oh yeah he was bad i mean this was a cool era man i mean i i'm so grateful i came

up in the 90s like watching the 90s knicks and shit they were just they never won but they were just so fucking cool yeah all right we got rhombus we got larry but we got to talk about a black player this is getting weird uh the 90s nicks they were viewing okay that was my those are my god the nicks right now are fucking awesome all right we gotta hit a game man i would love to go to a game all right we gotta hit it and then who are they getting net and yahoo what's the guy oh gianna nobi no Nobi. Oh, look at those guys. Look at the flat top, baby. Xavier McDaniel. Yeah, dude. Knicks are stacked right now.

That's someone he loves right there. That's a big arm. That's love, dude. That's LJ and John Starks. I had them both on my show, and I had an MSG show. Really? Yeah, dude. They were both cool as shit.

I think it's about that time for an Asian player, by the way. We had Linsanity. We had Linsanity, and we Linsanity and we had Yao Ming. Not we, but he was out there. Ming was sick, but injuries derailed him. You know they got the two tallest people in China to fuck? Did you know that? Really?

Yeah, that's how they made Yao Ming. Pull it up. No, no. No way. I mean, is there anything more China than that? How am I supposed to look that up? Did China get the two tallest people? It's a long Google.

There's no way. I put money on it. He's 7'5". You know the great story about, pull up the Shaq clip where he talks shit about Yao Ming. All right. Zhu Yan was taken to the state's grueling basketball training grounds and paired with grueling basketball training grounds and paired with something something fang fang d a former reds guard to give birth to a two meter tall human being damn mark that's a weird ass story i really like eugenics okay so now go now go youtube uh shack shitting on yao man because

i remember like shack could not stand him at first and this story gets funnier and funnier because like i fucking love the NBA. Is Shaq on Yao Ming racist, that one? Yeah, yeah. It's hilarious. Oh, shit. I don't know. Shaq on Yao Ming racist.

Hip-hop Friday night. The organization will hold a press conference in front of the Compact Center in Houston. Isaac loves comedy. To condemn Shaq's pigeon English. No. Oh, stop it. Wangju, whatever your name is is you want some of shack food it could have been a lot worse no there's a worse one there's another one neil said he was joking

and has since apologized for offending anybody but the remember the famous chink in the armor headline for jeremy lynn yeah i got fired it was the right expression though i know it's like when a guy got fired for using the the word nardly, but it was like, that means stingy. It's not like a fucking- Yeah. Oh, Mark's melting. It's in the dictionary.

Yeah. I looked it up. I guess there's a time and place. But yeah, Shaq, there's another one where he's like, tell Yao Ming, Ching Chong, whatever. It was bad. Oh. And then later, Shaq went to visit his family. He was like, fuck, yeah, it was pretty cool.

And then his parents were like, you're his favorite player. And he was like, I'm a fucking dickhead. That's funny. But yeah, it was sick. Yeah, it was great. And it just shows you can say something. And it doesn't mean you hate an entire race of people. Nah, he's fucking around.

He's fucking around. He just made a mistake. Shaq seems like the- Shaq would be a- he's a dream guest on this pod. Yeah. Oh. I feel like there's a- I mean, we need a- you're going to have to sit on my side of the couch. I would love it. But Shaq is like- he's up there with- we said Charlie Sheen.

Shaq is a dream guest. Good point. Shaq would be fucking awesome. Yeah. He would get drunk with us. Yeah, I think we got Jon Hamm. We need Hamm. We got Sheen and Shaq. How fucking awesome Yeah He would He would get drunk with us Yeah I think we got Jon Hamm We need Hamm We got Sheen and Shaq

How are we looking on Jon Hamm? Every now and then I get a message But nothing looks out I think it's possible We need Hamm Yeah Mark and I

We won't wear suits But we will drink old fashions Yes Yes You better fucking wear suits for Hamm We gotta wear a suit for Hamm? You wear suits I'll wear a suit for ham? You wear suits. I'll wear a suit.

Mad men and this motherfucker. Is it too much to go, when he walks in? And don't break eye contact. We both just stare at him. Ham, we want ham. The guy falling off. I've seen it too many times.

I show fucking rules. It's the best. We'll get Christina Hendricks in here to serve us Cooper slap her on the ass she was pretty special great character too love Joan

Joan is like Liz at the cell badass and just fucking gee this is Jessica Rabbit personified here she's gorgeous you know who she was married to for a while? Who? Good lord. That guy from Super Troopers. Oh, really? Get the fuck out of here. Wait till you see which one.

The Indian one? Yes! Oh, I would say his name, but it's like 38 letters. No, no, not that one. Oh. There's only one Indian one. No, he's like a side character. Uh, Farva? No. Can't be Farva. The guy in the car. i can't pull over anymore this guy get the fuck married what the hell is going on i can't handle it i mean he's divorced mark what we're

gonna do here i mean i mean i i just can't imagine these two i mean this is the oddest couple although jeffrey aaron i mean good for him i mean they're divorced so not good for him. I mean, they're divorced, so not good for him. Well, just that he pulled it. Hey, he's from the Big Island. Hey. Hey. Wow. That guy went up to her at a fucking event and spit some game.

He said, that rack of lamb is one of the finest I've ever seen. This should be a Hall of Fame thing on this show. Hall of Fame of guys who punched up and won. Yeah. That's incredible. What was his divorce? Was that winning? I mean, are we just taking into account that-

That's a win. He had a hell of a ride. That's a win. Hall of Fame win for life. I'm sure they went through hell with the divorce. It was grueling and sad and painful, but he titty fucked her on a Tuesday in March. And that's all that matters. That was a fucking good Tuesday.

It was. I bet he did on a Wednesday too. Yeah, probably that will never be forgotten. Like nine 11. John Ham. Just saying no thanks. I don't want to come on anymore.

Can you not talk about my, my co-star getting titty fucked? Wait, now where are you on titty fucking? You ever done it? Yeah, I like it. I don't get it. If the tits are really big, it's pretty fun. Yeah, I guess so. You lube them up a little bit, throw some lotion on there.

I just feel weird and then you're looking at her and you can tell she's not. Well, yeah, maybe you get a little licking going on while you while you're doing that that helps there's ways to make titty fucking work all right look it's not like it's not my first option sure sure but uh yeah it could be fun i think it's one of those like porno things where it like looks hotter than it is yeah yeah i'm too in my head with with shit like that i i just see her and i know i want to give her pleasure and obviously it's just skin on skin for her. It's not like a pleasurable area. Well, some women

do get off giving pleasure. That's true. That's true. Okay. And I get off giving pleasure. There you go. I was really doing a porno thing with the wife,

you know, the squirt up move and she was going nuts and obviously it's just my finger but I was like, this is awesome. Yeah. You gave your wife the squirt up move and she was going nuts and obviously it's just my finger but I was like this is awesome yeah you gave your wife the squirt? I did and we had to really get out of that forever 21 but

no wonder she was sick in Mexico she was dehydrated I like to do a character where I don't know how to finger and I'm just going like this I told her my first I like to do a character where I don't know how to finger, and I'm just going like this. I told him I first met with a girl, I was like 13 or whatever, and I was fingering like this. I'm like hitting the pubes.

I'm not even in the bottom area. There's no like, porn is really like, I guess, where you're educated. Like they have sex ed in school, but but you learn shit from porn, right? Yeah, porn. That's why I always finish by coming on a woman's face. That's my sex education. Yeah. I just perked up on that one. Yeah, Winnie liked that.

Sometimes I miss and I shoot a load on Winnie. That's why it's so sad. Yeah. So the eyes out. That's a better joke. Peters. Peters. The slam, the putback done. Yeah the Yao Ming She is so fucking cool this dog. Yeah, I do love it. I met an Asian guy forgot

I met an Asian guy in New Orleans one night at my wedding the night we went out after and there was this tall Asian Dude, and he was so funny was just like fucking killing everybody at the bar and I called him Yao zing It's the highlight of my life yeah did you write that you just come up with that just come up with that i came up with it then yeah your wedding man i remember there was like that burger spot in new orleans oh yeah it was clutch that was my friend ron it uh shout out to bub's burgers he killed it yeah he showed up with a pan so i feel like we're coming to an end here yeah but we have a listener submitted song oh wow i like by the way can end here. Yeah. But we have a listener submitted song. Oh, wow.

That I like to play. By the way, before we even play it, we have the best fucking listeners. Yeah. It blows my mind. The amount of like creativity. They send in these incredible creative things. They're always tweeting movies at me. Yes.

Someone just hit me with the movie Lone Star. I've never seen it. I'm going to watch it. Lone Star. Yeah, it's from the 90s. He was like, you like neo-noirs check this out i look it up it looks great really yeah it's uh chris cooper's a star oh is it kind of like a uh what was that one jeff bridges did where he's like a singer crazy heart crazy heart is it like that no but that was great that was fun bridge is fucking. He's the man. Especially as a comic. He was like a road vet.

He was older. He was a drunk. Yeah, that was like, that had a lot of comedy. Oh, parallels. Yeah, yeah. You're in a bowling alley. Right, right. Sorry, though.

Go ahead. Here's a little song. What's his name? So let's encourage people to send more stuff. Yeah. We should highlight it a little more, too. Yeah, we'll highlight. We love highlighting people.

John Ryan? Brian. John Bryant. Here you go, John. It was already a John too. Yeah, we'll highlight. We love highlighting people. John Ryan? Brian. John Bryant. Here you go, John. It was already a John Bryant. This one's for you. Hey, folks, we might be drunk. Really drunk.

This is a New Orleans tune. He's sampling. Hey, folks, we might be drunk. Shit face. Shit face. We might be drunk. Shit face. Shit face. The white stole from Black Boat.

Comedy. He just made a little remix. Fuck you, John. No, I liked it. That was fun. That was fun. It was fun, but that was a New Orleans send- send off there do we get a gift we have to open here all right let's check it out

okay what the hell's that might be the car for a good time uh-oh card for a good time uh-oh spread freaks dick fuel oh this guy when can we start vrooming i think it's a motorcycle company oh my god some fucking good for a good time scan this i don't know what that 18 plus right that freaks me out so i get a fucking calendar in the mail from germany it's some dude ass nate i wish i hate that people know where i live he sends me it's a calendar he's at first off i thought it was stavro sent it to me and i was like crack i was like oh stav sent me a calendar i'll like i'll use it that'll be funny to me you know but it's just some dude's ass for every month i'm like this is this sucks wow it sucks to get a shitty gift and you this dude knows my address

Yeah, oh, oh the address thing is It's like the black dick guy remember that guy RIP he died yeah mark And I fought to use him it like yeah, basically got shut down in our script We wanted to use a joke and the jet was a dumb like it was a throwaway joke But it was literally I think was me or mark showing the other one on our phone about this like event and it was just a black guy's dick and they were like the guy's dead i'm like but it's still fun and everybody knows it but that maybe that makes us like nc-17 or something oh that makes sense yeah but he was like pretty adamant like don't use those like we were laughing at yeah we just thought that was

like a funny how often you said never not funny. Someone's like, oh, fuck, this kid's dying. Please donate to the charity. And you click on it, it's a black dick. I love the idea where like salt burn, too much dick, a little money. We can't get this black dick in the movie. Comedy's different. Artsy movies. That's a good point.

Artsy movies, it's like. Because dicks are funny. Dicks are funny. They're not artsy.'s a good point artsy movies it's like because dicks are funny dicks are funny they're not artsy and farts are funny but like doing it like it was like under the guise of like you know dude just fucking hey that movie bugged me i know i don't know but it was it was uh shocking enough to get get you talking you know sure and to that i give credit you know like i get it but i also just because you're talking doesn't mean it worked but yeah i think this person like visually knows what they're doing she's got a beautiful eye and the acting was awesome but i just like

you know i thought it was a little hollow too i mean i don't want to shit on this person's movie you know but it's like we love this one guy you know but and then like the Venetia character was a little flat. I kind of liked her. I mean, I liked her, but I feel like there wasn't a ton there. I don't know. And then they support the black kid and he's like the one they help. And then they turn, I don't know, I just felt a little been done, a little rote. It just felt like, yeah, like a little underdeveloped.

Yeah, yeah but but but you know well done and they pulled it out i i have this like you know i guess i go toward movies instead of tv shows because you're in and out but then at that point you know you lack development like these tv shows can develop a character for Like you can develop a character further than you can a movie because you do over, over seasons as opposed to over 90 minutes to two hours, whatever. But yeah, I don't know.

There we go. I think you've done such a good job on this episode of like, I'll rant and rave about horse shit. And then you succinctly put it in a nice package and a nice sentence. Here's my package on this movie. The most interesting parts were just the shocking parts, whereas the plot itself wasn't exactly that clever. I feel like they earned it more. Very similar talent to Mr. Ripley, and I feel like they earned it more in that one.

There you go. They earned the shock, and they earned the... They built to it more. It was kind of just, like, too neat, as opposed to, opposed to like it was messy in Ripley and it should be messy. Yeah, it should be messy. That shit is fucking messy. Yeah. That's a great fucking book too.

If you haven't read Talented Mr. Ripley, man, Patricia Highsmith is a fucking – Is it a series or is it just one book? I feel like it's a series. It's a series. It's a series. Okay. But the first one is like the masterpiece. It's like Ripley's game and stuff. Right. But the first one is like the masterpiece. You know, it's like Ripley's Game and stuff.

Right. But like, Talented Mr. Ripley is like epic, man. She wrote Strangers on a Train. Oh, wow. Yeah, she's a fucking legend. Yeah. Great, great suspense writer. If you took the period blood and the grave fucking out, would people be talking about it?

That's my point. That's a good point. That's my point. That's a good point. That's my point. And it's just a lot of beautiful people, right? Like the main guy. The main guy. The guy, he is a handsome fucker. Handsome, dude.

Like pretty guy. That guy, he's like the it guy now. I forgot, Jacob Elordi, is that his name? Elordi, yeah. Elordi? He's like eight feet tall, pretty boy face. He's got it all. He's a handsome kid.

But now people are talking about the uh the irish guy who's uh oh the main guy barry yeah he's a very good actor i mean that is a traditionally unattractive man yeah but talent goes a long way it does and the cock didn't hurt the same shit about uh adam driver yeah i mean traditionally unattractive but i like him i'd blow him. But is the cock actually big? Because he's like, what, 5'4"? That's true.

I mean, you know. It's weird. He gets so Irish, it's almost Asian. You know what I mean? If you go far enough, it goes into Korean. Penis and everything. Well, the penis was big. He't bad yeah i think tiny so you're like is it big that's the question right he clearly fluffed did he i think so we got to

fluff in our movie oh i'll be fluffing i'll be fluffing too should we fluff each other we'll play it by ear we'll hire aer. Be stuck if you get a dude fluffer. Wait, that's not the picture. I'm the fluffer. We should do a flubber remake with fluffer. Okay. I can't stop fluffing. Should we plug some dates?

Hell yeah. Where are you going to be, man? All right. I'm in Tampa, I think this weekend, coming up. Tampa Theater? Where are you? Tampa Theater. Beautiful? All right. I'm in Tampa, I think this weekend, coming up. Tampa Theater? Where are you? Tampa Theater. Beautiful. We had a show.

Beautiful theater. Where are we? Yeah, Tampa Theater. Oh, great. Two shows and then Jacksonville, Florida, at the Florida Theater, which will, that is not selling great, but hopefully by this time it'll sell out. Indianapolis, speaking of Larry Bird. Egyptian Room?

Klaus Memorial Hall, whatever that is. I did a shirk on Columbus, Ohio, January 19th. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Davidson Theater, Columbus, Ohio. Then the Beacon Theater, New York City. Added a show. First one sold out.

Holly Lee, a punch-up. Danny from Punch-Up, I think, really helped. He's the best. Danny Frankel, shout out. Love him. Night Theater in Charlotte, North Carolina. Lexington Opera House. San Antonio.

Houston. Salt Lake City. Boise, Idaho. Atlanta. When are you in Salt Lake City? What week? That is February 16th. Ah, we just miss each other.

17th, yeah. Are you there before? No, right after you. Uh-oh, I'm swooping in early, stealing your tickets. A lot of crossover. Atlanta, Raleigh, Austin. We're going to add a show there. Tucson, Arizona.

Phoenix, Arizona. Charlottesville. Charlotte. Albuquerque. El Paso, to name a few. MarkNormanComedy.com. Get Bodega Cat. Charlottesville. That theater there is really fun, man.

Very fun theater. It's a fun city. Doing that with the fat Chris Allen. That'll be fun. We'll do it up. Come on out. New material. What do you got?

I got Philly this weekend. We just added a show. What room? I'm doing the punch line. I'm doing clubs again. Oh, shit. Yeah, yeah. It should be fun. We just added a show. What room? I'm doing the punchline. I'm doing clubs again. Oh, shit. Yeah, yeah. It should be fun.

We just added a late Sunday. Lil Gary's going to be there with me. Won't bring the gun. Stanford, Connecticut. I think that might be gone, but that was supposed to be a fun room. Dania Beach. Nice. That's a fun one.

Yeah. Omaha. All fun rooms. Dallas. The Addison Improv. We got Oklahoma City. OKC Comedy Club. And then we got Irvine, February 23rd through the 25th. That's moving well.

And then we got Salt Lake City the following week at Wise Guys Comedy Club, February 29th through March 2nd. And the following weekend is the taping at the Wilbur, baby. I'm excited. Whoa. I think that's gone, I think. Wow. It says tickets available for the late show. Oh, late. I'm excited. Whoa. I think that's gone, I think, but it's... Wow. It says tickets available for the Late Show. Oh, Late Show on Thursday, maybe. All right, cool.

Jesus. That'll sell. I mean, you got two months to sell that. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's gonna be... You'll be fine. And I think we're being cautious with kills right now, so we might open up a few more, but... Okay. But who knows? Hate the kills. Hate the kills, too. Yeah, come on. They always overkill. They overkill. It's annoying. But I'm pumped to tape that one. I'm sick of the kills. I hate the kills too. Yeah, come on. They always overkill. They overkill.

It's annoying. But I'm pumped to tape that one. I'm sick of the material. I'm just like, I've been doing it too long. It's a killer hour. Thank you, man. I saw it whenever the hell JFL was.

That was a while back. Man, that was a tough crowd though. That was a tough crowd. They were drunk as shit. I got off and I was like, I could have done better and then you didn't like it. I was like, all right, good.

No, you were great. And then I was like, insurance. I was like, man, I could have done better. And then you didn't like it. I was like, all right, good. No, you were great. And then I was like, insurance. I was like, man, this guy won't stop heckling me. I'm bringing out Norman, Ian Lauer, and Brad Williams. And having a little guy out there. Yeah. Just a little slam dunk for riffing. But yeah, keep listening to the pod, Bodega Cat, Whiskey.

A lot of people message us about how great the set designs have been lately on this show. Oh, yes. Matt Peters. Pete. Best in the game. Just crushing it. Really the best. Amazing.

Hell yeah. Gotham Studios crushing it. He's doing so many pods here. Henrik Lundqvist from the fucking Rangers has a pod here. He's killing it. Natalie Cuomo. Natalie Cuomo. Andy Haynes.

And if you're in New York and you need a podcast studio on the fly, call up Gotham. He's at the pod here. He's killing it. So, yeah. Natalie Cuomo. Natalie Cuomo, Andy Haynes. And if you're in New York and you need a podcast studio on the fly, call up Gotham. This guy's got some good mics here. Yeah. Do you plug in anything, Salakis? No, I'm all good. Winnie will be eating chocolate later tonight. She's crushing, dude.

All right. Well, this has been awesome. And we love you guys. Keep listening. And fuck, yeah. See you dude. All right. Well, this has been awesome. And we love you guys. Keep listening. And fuck yeah. See you soon. Thank you. Sunday's the day for my next bender.

A bit of Piverec. You know the future's close. I've had a little too much bourbon. And Norman's talking shit about the fucking Pope. And i get down in the same way up on the roof like a cop's coming and naked samuel is feeling dangerous i'm out to lunch here in new orleans this woman doesn't look like i remember her and i get down in the same way We might be true