We Might Be Drunk - Ep 175: We Might Be Running For President [Ft. Andrew Yang]

Episode Date: April 15, 2024

Best of both worlds, we got a good segment up top with the guys, combing cereal and Bodega Cat for some fun drinks. This one is a a hot one with former US Presidential Candidate, Andrew Yang coming in and sharing some knowledge with the guys. Sam Morril: https://www.sammorril.com/  Mark Normand: https://marknormandcomedy.com/ Andrew Yang: https://www.andrewyang.com/ Shop: https://www.wemightbedrunkpod.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/wemightbedrunkpod Bodega Cat: http://www.bodegacatspirits.com We Might Be Drunk is produced, recorded and edited by Gotham Production Studios. Head producer: Matthew Peters https://www.gothamproductionstudios.com/ https://www.instagram.com/mrmatthewpeters/ If you want to start a podcast contact [e-mail] for a discount on services when referred by WMBD! Support the show and get $5 off your Mando Starter Pack with code DRUNK at https://www.shopmando.com Support the show, a free gift, AND 25% off your Diet Smoke order at https://www.dietsmoke.com with code 420DRUNK.

Hey! I did nothing wrong. Everything I just said was PG. Well, it would be fun to have her on if she was down to talk about that. Really? You're gonna cut all this out, right? Oh no! And now we're starting! Oh my god! We're cutting everything we just said out. Woo! Yeah, cut all that that was bad all right wow Mary I've done some bad things in my life well. That's on her and me Yeah, it was almost on her. I'll tell you that

Cut that part. What the fuck is driving her now? Okay, now we start no you can keep that and just cut the names. Yeah We'll believe it the names have been changed to protect the innocent What is this Fargo? Out of respect for the survivors Don't you hate when they say true based on a true story. Just tell me the true story well guess what Fargo It's not a true story They're just doing that because they did that with the movie and it was like a cool

But then they're like you know this is all the events that are being told actually happened. Then they're like, they haven't. Of course. You know, if I watch the show, you're like, that ain't fucking real. No, no, but that, what a great story, Fargo. It was fun. The fucking car salesman guy, William H. Macy killed it. The Francis McDormand is the cop with the cop husband.

That was great. It's such a good story. Bushemi, the other great. Oh man good story Bushemi the other guy oh dude I mean we've played it so many times this pop at the grandpa getting killed yeah yeah right in the good and it's so fucking this is how good the Coen brothers are is they like they will do the most violent shit yeah and they'll do it in kind of a funny way. Yes, and the genes of the Coen brothers, they have the best character actors in cinema. Ever.

Ever, like, I mean, what's his face? Javier Bardem goes to that gas station in the middle of nowhere, and that guy behind the counter, he's like, heads or tails, the guy's like, I don't know what your dog has, whatever, and it's so, they're all great. You're right, they're all killers. Also, I mean, Javier Bardem just with that fucking haircut.

Oh yeah. Oh, here we go. Ooh, wait, gotta get the sound off of that. We've watched this so many times. What's the fucking joke here? ["The Last Post," by The Bachelorette, playing in background.] Sounds like Sam when he comes on a roof. You almost expect him to call me young whippersnapper right as he dies. Yeah, why has he kept that take? I mean I guess it's pretty realistic.

Yeah, it's pretty damn fucking dark. Oh yeah. This whole movie is like pure neo-noir man. You know what I watched last night for the first time? By the way, anyone who, how many young people do you complain to? Like I have insomnia. They're like, all right, what do you do right before bed?

They're like, I watch Prisoners and then The Exorcist. I'm like, oh cool, I wonder if that's playing a role. Right, Night Stalker, it's all true crime. It's all true crime or just a dark movie. Yeah. And you're looking a dark movie. Yeah. And you're looking at a screen. Yep. You're looking at your computer.

I'm like no more, I might not do a TV in the bedroom ever. I don't do that. I don't have one in my bedroom. Too much. I think it might be a bad idea because now I force myself to read and I fall asleep. Reading works. But I did watch Sicario before bed.

I'd never seen it. Oh, amazing. I always dated a woman who had seen it. So every time it came up, they were like, I've already seen it. I'm like, well, I want to see it. And it was one of those that was always a little too late on the road. And the last night, I was like, fucking, I'm watching it.

Man, Benicio is cool. Oh, yeah. That is an underrated film. I don't feel like people talked about it enough. It's so good. That writer, Taylor Sheridan, just like... Is that him? Yeah, he's just kind of a beast.

He's great. He did fucking Hell or High Water. He did so many good movies. Oh yeah, wow. Yellowstone. Yellowstone's a huge hit. I mean, I feel a little cheesy watching it because it's basically a soap opera.

Yeah, it's not my favorite. I like his movies better, but Hell or High Water is like a fucking masterpiece. Masterpiece. I think it was nominated for best pick should have been or at least best Screenplay loved it. Yeah, Sheridan's uh, he's a he's a killer Yeah, I got a wreck if we're going right down the barrel here for it We should probably explain this Oh border wall. I saw a guy in Instagram We should credit this guy cuz I've no we should credit him. Because I saw him, he's like a whiskey,

he's like a cocktail guy, and. Alcoholic. Alcoholic. Is the term. He's an alcoholic. Yeah. So I saw him do the Cinnamon Toast Crunch old fashioned, I was like, that looks kind of good.

Oh yeah. So we start, you know, me, Peters, Norman, we're on the text thread, I was like, what if we did some other cereals? Yes. And then, you know, me, Peters, Norman, we're on the text thread, I was like, what if we did some other cereals? Yes. And then, look at this guy, he gets Reese's Peanut Butter Puffs. Yeah.

This was like, this was not allowed in my house growing up. Oh yeah, that's crack cocaine right there, that's fentanyl. I wanted Cracklin' Oat Bran, old fashions. Oh yeah. But they discontinued it, that's my favorite cereal. That's very regional. True?

Never heard of that in my house, that, I never heard of Cracklin' Oat. But we got the it, it's my favorite cereal. Very regional, never heard of that in my house. I never heard of cracklin' oat. But we got the cinnamon, I'm kind of, what are you most pumped to try these three? I'm least pumped for the Cocoa Puffs one. Yeah. It's just, because I feel like it's just gonna be chocolate. It's chocolate, cinnamon toast crunch is a can't miss,

but I'm a peanut butter fanatic. Why don't you start off the peanut butter and I'll start off the cinnamon toast crunch. Well we should also describe, would we leave this soaking overnight with cereal in it? Yep. Okay. This is just fucking pure sugar.

Whatever you can. It's whiskey and sugar. By the way, you should all be following us on PunchUp.live slash Samorail and PunchUp.live slash Mark Norman. Yes. It's just uncensored shit that we won't post on Instagram or they'll bury on Instagram or YouTube. And we post tour dates, the cool new thing. Sky Danny Frankl is helping us get going on it.

It's great. So follow us on that shit. Look who's on it. Rick Glassman, Tim Dillon, all these people. Norman. Adam Ray. Jordan Jensen. A lot of funny people.

He has good taste. Alright, there we go. You get the point. Did you have to look like a urine sample? Did you have to get the stool sample sperm bank? This smells, I mean I guess it's just whiskey and peanut butter, right? So it smells potent as hell. Do you want to do the honors with this one or do the honors with this one? You go, you go. Break the hymen. Get in there. Oh boy, describe everything. What are your senses feeling? I'm getting notes of peanut butter.

Ooh, that's exciting. Okay, Sam's going down the gullet. Alright. Fuck, that's pretty damn good. Oh, come on! Holy shit. That is a problem. Come on, quit bo-garting it. I think we need a peanut butter bodega cat blend.

Ooh, don't tease me fatty. That is crazy. How close are we getting it into New York City, the bodega cat? I mean, it might be out now because we are pre-recording this. What do you think? Oh my, that's good.

It's too much. It's too much for the sentence. It's like a speed ball. Yeah, it's the thing I don't think I could really drink. Yeah. But damn do I appreciate it. You can taste, you know when the milk takes over the cereal at the end,

and the milk is colorful and all that, that's what it tastes like with a kick of whiskey. Let's see what we got here. I'm gonna start off the Cinnamon Toast Crunch, swirl it. That's heavy duty. See, the problem is the sugar makes you wanna chug it. Oh my God, yeah, the smell is really fuckin' overwhelming. I'm gettin' notes of this one,

I'm gettin' notes of cinnamon. Notes of toast. Some notes of crunch. All right, I'm goin' in on the chocolate. This is crack. This is too. Really? More than the other one? This is way too, you know how this would be good

if you watered it down? Cause it's too sugary. Yeah, I agree. The ice would cut it. The ice would cut it, but also I think like, the way you put a little water in whiskey sometimes, or in like a scotch and water. That's no good.

No good? That's the bomb. I had doubts about Cocoa Puffs. Yeah. I was never a Cocoa Puffs guy. It was a one-note cereal. It's one note. I like a chocolate cereal, but yeah.

Cocoa Krispies were better, though. I gotta fight you on that. Really? Too soggy. Soggy? Yeah, these held their shape for a little longer. Oh, I do like older women. By the way, it's gonna be back on Taste Buds. I don't hate it. It's all's alright. Yeah, I think you lowered my expectation. Okay. Okay. You know might be nice

It's fruity pebbles something other than they Chocolate II. Hey, I wonder if the fruity. Yeah, maybe it would work. I fruity pebbles are crack. Yeah, that shit's Yeah, that's good stuff captain crunch knew what he was doing This would be a great that would be good. Yeah, very oh, yeah This would be a hilarious, that would be good. Yes, yes. Crunch berries. Oh yeah. This would be a hilarious way to get like one of our sober friends back on booze. I fell back off man.

It was a peanut butter puff old fashioned. Yeah. Kids don't do this at home by the way. Wow, this one might be the winner. The cinnamon. It's just too sweet. If we want, I think we throw a little water in there, we got a fucking good cocktail.

Oh yeah, wow, thank you, Matt. I mean, I can't imagine your wife's gonna leave you because you're a seven-year-old alcoholic. You're mixing breakfast foods and booze at like at night with a... We're gonna call this a Drew Barrymore. What, a Corey Feldman on the rocks? Hey, I like that.

Oh yeah. Woo, that is good stuff. So is this our guy here? That's him. That's him. Let's get the name out there for credit. Tim the Tank Official. I feel like he does a lot of cool shit on here. He's doing a lot of cool mixology stuff.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch Old Town. This is what we found. Yeah, to make it. Fill up a jar with Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Fill the rest of our jar up with bourbon. This is what the terrorists hate us. Have you ever just had an idea that you started acting on, and mid through that idea while you were doing it,

you realized to yourself, holy crap, this is a better idea than I thought? This is that idea right now. Put this in the fridge and let it sit overnight. The wait is finally over, so let's go ahead and strain this into a bottle. There's a few things we can all agree on. One of those is that soggy cereal is gross. So let's go ahead and strain this into a bottle. There's a few things we can all

Sauge cereal is gross finally. We're gonna add in four ounces of our cinnamon toast crunch bourbon You can always use a rye as well. Those were just as good with old-fashioned You know we should have done her three to four down added more sugar What a psycho already fucking crash and sugar dissolved drop in our ice bowl We should have done is sprinkled a little in there on top a little because He's already fucking crashed. Stir this till the cinnamon sugar dissolves, drop in our ice mold. We should have done a sprinkle a little in there on top. A little, because that's what he did. Yeah. It's alright, it's alright. We'll be back.

You did good work, Matt. Thank you, Matt. Really? I might take one home. Oh, we should do a check-in on Wennie because I hear she might be back next week. Yeah, big win. Do a California check-in. Yeah, she's out west getting her son.

She's popped off since she started doing We Might Be Drunk, she's out west doing some auditions. Ah, ha ha ha ha ha. I mean, she's in her element there. That's her natural habitat is that LA sun. Just looks miserable. Ah, ha ha ha ha ha. He looks like Walter Matho.

All right, so my brick, you gotta see the Steve Martin doc. Oh, you told me last night. I can't talk good about it enough. It's so well done. And you read the book, right? I read the book, it's basically the book come to life. So you get to see footage, you get to see him bombing, you get to see him with a beard in the 60s, early 70s.

It's fucking fascinating. You thought we struggled. This guy went through hell. I can assume that he, I mean, just from reading that book, I assumed he went through shit. Oh yeah. I mean, he's so fucking funny. Like I feel like young people may not know,

but like the jerk. Oh my God, incredible. Fucking hilarious. And I say, say you watch you feel like a fraud because we do comedy he changed comedy right he changed the whole thing and it obviously was such a uphill battle to to do what he did because he's you know you see a guy with an arrow through the head you're like oh this guy's a hack so you immediately hate him but he made it it was so bad he

made it good it's really it's brilliant What do you got the rules to break the rule? Yeah? I think a lot of people forget that I think they could just break the rules But like if you know what you're doing and you can write a killer joke you can do the other weird shit, too Totally totally, but they show all the learning that you know because in the beginning he was just bad He's bad with an arrow in his head. Did you see it yet, Sam? I haven't, I'm gonna see it. What's it on? Apple.

It's on Apple, yeah, he has a great moment. Oh, sorry, Mark. I cried, that's the last thing I'll say. And I'm not a crier, John Crier. Go, sorry. He was just saying how he sort of figured out halfway through doing this, he was like, oh, I'm deconstructing comedy.

He didn't even realize it. And then he was like, this character I'm doing is sort of making fun of show business itself while I'm trying to be in show business. It's very intellectual stuff. Yeah, and they get into the process of writing the jokes, which is kind of rare and cool. And you pointed out there's no talking heads.

It's just Steve Martin and you hear from other people, but he's in a conversation, oh, there's a talking head right there. Wait a minute, that's part two. I didn't see part three yet. All right in a conversation. Oh, I was talking to him right there. Wait a minute, that's part two. I didn't see part three yet. All right, all right. Oh, it's a series. It's him back in the day and then him now.

Him now is heavy and great, seeing him as an old man. He's so serious sometimes. Oh my God, he's a big nerd, he's very serious. I love him with Martin Short. Oh, they go through all that. So you gotta see it. They're like made to do shit together. Yeah. I love watching their Hulu show. Yeah. Yeah it's amazing. The ball busting they do is unbelievable.

It's fun. It's funny. That's how you do it. That's how you do it. It's just silly and uh. Yeah they're just two comedy icons going at it. It's great. Three amigos I realize is kind of Tropic Thunder before Tropic Thunder. Ooh! Right? Yeah. Good eye, good call. That's a fun movie. I love both of them, just saying. I've seen that movie nine million times. I have it on VHS, Three Amigos. Old school.

Yeah, so very old one, so like the wind. I just started, shout out Gary Veeder, he got me the Caddyshack book. I just started this Caddyshack book, it's The Making of Caddyshack,. I just started this caddyshack book It's the making a caddyshack. It's like they were such fucking degenerates Oh the cocaine the booze the whores everything. Yeah, but uh, it's a better time How did you have that ready he sent me this already oh That's fun, I love it

Oh. Oh, that's fun. I love it. I'm a killer like you rappers, I'm an angel. They was rockin' with your ass till they made it to sit. All I see from this is that Rodney works in every generation. You got that right. Remember the first time you heard Rodney's story about Caddyshack where they would go,

all right, and action, and he would do his lines. And he goes, Chevy, I'm bombin' out here. And he's like like it's a movie But the first time I heard that as a comedian. I was like oh my god. I'm not alone I love that he's been singing in the rain, too. Oh yeah, dude. I mean just a fucking icon I Love yeah, I love just hearing these stories too about how they all thought it was gonna be a bomb caddy chef. Oh yeah like You know another relatable moment. What's the guy who made it?

Doug Kenny? Yeah. Doug something? And Bill Murray's brother co-wrote it, right? Yeah, yeah. Who else? And Harold Ramis. And Harold Ramis, yeah.

Those are like the comedy, not the gods of like behind the scenes comedy. The Harvard, yeah. Nash Lampoon. Yeah. They did all that shit. So they changed the comedy game, and then the guy who saw it, or who made it. What's his name Doug?

Yes, this is Kenny nerd comedy shit. He saw airplane. He's like, I'm the funniest guy in the world I make the best comedy. No one could touch me. Then he went and saw airplane. He goes I suck This is the best comedy and then he killed himself. Yeah, not to give it away Yeah, so don't see Airplane. Yeah. Don't wanna get into comedy. No, I actually just rewatched Naked Gun. Oh!

Man, there's some great fucking moments. Gold! Pull up that scene where he's doing the interrogation. You know what I'm talking about? You're talking about money? Yeah, yeah, you know what I'm talking about. Oh, I love that scene. This is fucking comedy gold.

That's vaudeville shit. That's going back to Abbott and Costello and all that stuff. It's man Leslie Nielsen just knows how to fucking deliver a joke to well He's the most serious actor and the most not it's the second one Maybe this I think this is it but the other one was a shorter version. Oh chalk outline in the water I mean, that's a great sight gang here it is This is great if the Alright, alright, you work at one week shipping. You tried to push up on one of my boys, I swear. So what are you gonna do about it, copper? What should I tell you?

Maybe this will help. Let's do it over there, guys. That's better. Stop being a pointy. How about now? Alright. You know that was like a tag at the last moment. Yes, yes.

We should have him do it again. We should ask for money, yeah. You gotta keep heightening it. It's so good. It breaks the whole trope. It's so dumb that it becomes smart. Yes, yes, exactly. heightening it. It's so good, it breaks the whole trope. It's so dumb that it becomes smart. Yes, yes, exactly. Deconstructing comedy, just like Martin.

Yeah, so you have to know comedy so well to be able to reverse it. I love it. It's actually pretty impressive. I remember one time at the cellar, I think Tracy Morgan was like, it's all about comedy, it's not about being funny, it's about comedy.

And then I saw him at that MSG show and he's like, it's not about comedy, it's not about being funny, it's about comedy. And then I saw him at that MSG show and he's like, it's not about comedy, it's about being funny. And both times I'm just nodding like yes. Yeah right, what's that norm quote from Rodney? He's like, stand up, it's all about stand up man, it's all about stand up, movies they're shit, TV it's shit, stand up, it's all shit. I'm butchering it but it's something like that. He acts like stand-up. It's all shit Butchering it, but I know where you're going

Like the acts like this is stand-up is the only like holy thing last and then even then he turns on stand-up Yes, exactly How long is it you got it you got to find the because this could be too long But yeah, you find it you figure it out. Oh, it's caption. Perfect. Yeah, man You find it, you figure it out. Oh, it's captioned, perfect. Yeah, man. Is there more of a comedy pod than this? We love it, man.

We've touched on Naked Gun, Zuckerbucker, Caddyshack, Doug Kinney, Steve Martin, Rodney, Norm. I got it here. All right. He joke at the joke at the joke. I like, there's very few that I like, but I love Rodney Gainesville, he's my favorite. And he was good with funny jokes. Favorite. Yeah, the guy who would fuck with jokes, but he was great.

His jokes had to be so fucking good. Did he write his own jokes? Yeah, he wrote them all. I know guys who went into meetings with him about a movie. He'd show up late in a bathrobe with his balls hanging out. Yeah. Like, what the fuck is wrong with you? You talk about not giving a fuck.

You worship that. You want to be that guy who doesn't give a fuck, right? I met Rodney now when I was... They don't even answer him. ...made the worst mistake ever, which I was in a fucking hotel and I loved Rodney and shit. I didn't know him. And I was coming down in the casino. I was coming down the fucking elevator. He's like a nine-year-old fucking... God fucking god, say something. So anyways, I worked on some stupid fucking thing with this director. He said he worked for Rodney. I That fucker's no friend of mine. You tell him he gets shot by a dick. I'm like, oh, we're not his friend. I'm not his friend. I don't remember that part.

That wasn't even it. That's another great one. Great, great. I'm thinking about bad business. Speaking of me and Mark, dude, I mean, you know, we're trying to get Bodega Cat off the ground. We are so incompetent. Oh, this is great.

We have to set up an LLC. I just drown in emails, just I just get anxious and I just stop opening them. It just makes me crazy. Is that how you are? One of the same. Yeah. I'm just like, I can't look at another one. I see an email. I think it's the same thing over and over again for some reason. I see an email. It's been responded to I noticed like 14 times. I'm like, oh shit this is about us setting up an LLC for Bodega Cat. Yeah. We got to incorporate. Which we've been trying to do for two years. And we're just idiots.

So I see Marks responded, I see Marks respond like eight times and I haven't responded. Marks like, oh, yeah, I'll be at the bank. It's at this bank. Sure, I'll be there. We picked the bank by your house. We picked the bank by my place. You're close to you too.

But we're like, you know, we picked this bank. And they're like, Marks like, I'm in. I'll be there. And then she goes, you guys didn't show up today. And Marks like, ah, fuck. And then that's where I pick up. And I'm like, oh I'm in I'll be there and then she goes you guys didn't show up today marks like ah fuck That's where I pick up and I'm like oh my god. I'm sorry so then so then you missed it, too I would have felt horrible if you were there how we do business. We're both like oh fuck Yeah, eight people set up a meeting and we both just are like ah shit. I don't know meanwhile our biggest priority is Reese's Pieces whiskey

We're like hang on Matt you gotta get three boxes we gotta try them all before the guests come. We're fucking incompetent business people we don't know what we're doing so but also the emails the way they just bottle up. I know. I'm too tired I quit. Yeah that's a peeve you know you try to it's like you have six unread emails but it's all one email but it's just that different I know and you have to if you don like, you have six unread emails, but it's all one email, but it's just the different, and you have to, if you don't look at each one, they don't count as red. It unloads. It drives me crazy.

It unloads in a way where you're like, holy, it's like, just keeps, it's like the magician, but it just keeps taking the thing out, and you're like, oh my, never ends. I know, you're just scrolling, like, where's the latest one? Where, and they keep it smaller, you know, they go to the right, that's the whole thing.

I got a peeve. This is about our buddy, Gary Veeder. Oh! The friend, I love you,'s all thank I got a peeve this is about our buddy Gary Veeder oh the friend I love you Gary but is a peeve you have that friend who like you know whenever it's convenient they're like I live in Jersey but without traffic 20 minutes oh that's the biggest guess what there's always traffic yep and then guess what when you need something from them they're like I'm in Jersey I'm an hour and a half away oh great I thought you were 20 minutes away without traffic. Yes, it's that whole thing, like that sign

on the episode where she's like. Is that Winnie in traffic? You're just blowing her up. 20 minutes, where they go, hey, they got the ski equipment. And she's like, here you go. And she's like, I'm three blocks from my house. And the girl's like, the other lady's like, yay, three blocks, easy walk.

And she's like, yeah, but you could just drive me. And she's like, but it's three blocks. And the other girl goes, yeah, it's three blocks. And now they, hey, three blocks, easy walk. And she's like, yeah, but you can just drive, man. She's like, but it's three blocks. And the other girl goes, yeah, it's three blocks. And now they're fighting over three blocks. But it's a great point because it's like, yeah, it's three blocks, just walk. Yeah, but it's three blocks, so just drive. So they just both get-

Whose side are you on? I'm on the drive side because she's like, well, if I go up three blocks, I gotta turn 18 one ways and all that. But it's like, which one is it? Is it really three blocks? It's so easy or is it not three blocks, it's so easy. So it's kind of a philosophical debate, but yeah.

It's so true. There's a lot of philosophical debates on Seinfeld. Yeah. You know what I was just listening to is, I was listening to Julia Louis Dreyfus podcast and- She has a podcast? She has a pod and I only listened the first 10 minutes because someone sent it to me like,

you should hear this cause it's about making a show and she talks about how progressive Seinfeld was for its time because she talks about the contest episode. And she was like, man, I felt so lucky to be on that show because they do this masturbation bet. I know, but like every other, like, first off, it was edgy to get that on NBC. They never say the word masturbation,

but they get it on TV. Where it takes a leap is like, she goes, okay, any other sitcom of its time would have made the bet about Elaine. It would have been like, she walks in wearing something slutty, and all the guys are like, you think we cannot jack off? But Seinfeld, she's like, Seinfeld's so ahead of its time

that they included Elaine in the bait, in the bait. In the bait? Masturbate and bet, I combined the two. They include her in the bet, and now, you knowasturbate and bed, I combined the two. Right. They include her in the bed and now, you know, they give her odds, right? Yes, of course. She's a woman. But it's like, you know.

That great Kramer delivery, she's like, well, I do it too. And he goes, not every day. Bookshake in his throat, so good. No, it was, she's cool. I love her. Oh, I'm a huge, put her on the dream guest list. Rest dead wall.

No, sorry, wrong wall. Put her on the dream guest list, you know? He's also dead. Polly Walnuts. By the way, she's making a bid for greatest comedy actor of all time, if you think about all of her shows. I don't think there's... if we're talking like... is there an argument? Three shows? She won an Emmy? Yeah. By the way, that episode won an Emmy, the contest won an Emmy. But yeah, Veep is incredible. She's amazing in Veep. She's a, she was on SNL as well. The new stories of old Christine won, she won Emmy's. Yeah, yeah. She's a powerhouse.

Veep is fucking incredible. It's a joke a minute. It's so good. And it was doing political before political was like all the rage. Did political political in a very like we're all full of shit type of way. Yes. That's a good that's the right way to do political. That's a good angle. No side pick just it's all bull. We're all out for ourselves we're all trying to fuck you. There's something really funny about everyone trying to fuck everyone over at all times. Oh. Even within her own camp they're trying to fuck each

other over. Yeah which is kind of realistic. That's kind of how everybody's working. Oh yeah, because everyone's terrified. Yes. Everyone's terrified to lose their job. Exactly. Speaking of political, we got a fun guest. What was it?

Not bad to look at either. And a very underrated hot lady. Yeah. She's an underrated hot lady because she didn't ever lead with it. Right. Because she was so much more than that. I mean, she's so funnyrated hot lady because she didn't ever lead with it. Right. But she was so much more than that. I mean, she's so funny.

Led with the talent. I mean, she did have a giant wall of hair in the 90s for some reason. I don't know who's ideal. It's so funny we watched it and we're like, that was not... That wasn't good for anybody. I guess Jerry had the same hair. He had that big... The poof.

Yeah, the big curly poof. Did you pull up the Portland Seinfeld pictures? Seinfeld, if it was done in Portland. Oh, I've never seen that. Look at that wall, I mean, it's a beehive of hair. Yeah, it's not the best, I mean, she's got such a pretty face. I know.

I was on Colbert with her, I didn't get to meet her. Yeah, I wish I got to meet her. Oh my God. I'm not gonna bother another guest. I would put Tina Fey in the underrated hot as well. For sure. She's a pretty lady. Same thing as Julia Louis-Dreyfus,

we just think of her as funny. Yeah. 30 Rock is so fucking good. So good. Also, Julie Louis, rich kid, still talented. So it kinda puts that whole thing to bed. You gotta be from the streets and depressed and all that shit.

I guess you can still be depressed if you're rich but you know what I mean what are you pulling up he said the Portland oh there's like Gen Z Seinfeld it's really funny they all have like necklaces on and and George has like arm tattoos yeah that's not that's not that's not it but that's something. You're getting there. Okay, then. I can't click on this because it's going to say he's a man. He's signed for introducing Billy Joel's 100th show at the Garden. What'd he say?

It's pretty great. He just like praises him how great he is. He's like, I'm from Long Island, you're from Long Island, your music makes us feel like we're all friends with each other, and thanks for selling me that house. That was great. Really? He bought Billy Joel's house in Long Island in the Hamptons. So we're all in this together but we're not. We're both much richer than all of you. Yeah, yeah. I bought his house.

No you can't find it. Damn it, Salacuse. Any other peeves? I got some peeves. I got another two. Yo, hit me. I wrote two down today, so let me pull that up. By the way, I apologize if I repeated jokes in the last one. I realized I was looking at jokes from an old email. You ever just type in jokes in your Gmail and an older one pops up for some reason? Of course, yeah. I hate that shit. That's the worst. That's a peeve. Oh, look at this. Oh, he looks like Veeder.

Wow. They look Dominican here. I know, right right they went more ethnic This is this isn't the one I was thinking of but this is funny that works Oh Geez he looks grizzled She looks kind of hot That's Elaine That's person tome. Is it I think so. I don't know. I think it was Elaine.

Oh, the leather jacket. The legend. Jerry Still. What do you got? The face shouldn't change. What are the peeves? Oh, I thought I wrote two down. I wrote one, uh, how about this guy? This is getting away with murder. This is my peeve. The guy who goes, This is my peeve. The guy who goes, You're wrecked. It doesn't have to be your act. It could be anything. Those pants. That haircut. I don't want to say it's ugly. That's not the right word. And I'm like, you just got away with calling me ugly.

You go, I don't want to say, I don't want to say those pants are too tight, but that's not the word. I don't want to say your mother's a two-timing whore,... but somewhere in that... well guess what I'm not repeating that part to my mother. Yeah exactly you get away with murder by saying I don't want to say this word even though you just literally just said that word and now that words in my head even if you didn't want to say it you just said it. Come guzzling cocksucker is not the word. Yeah that's not it. Give, give me another, what's a, give me a synonym for that. Gay. Right?

So I hate the, I don't wanna say, insert word here. I don't mean that, but you just said it. As though it's in my head either way. Why don't you form your thoughts and then come back to me when you can put a sentence together. There you go. Yeah, I'm with you. The I don't wanna say, you're right, you're saying it.

You're saying it. It's been said. And you're getting away with saying it. Yeah. By saying I don't wanna say, yeah. Oh, I was saying it. You're saying it. It's been said. And you're getting away with saying it. You're saying I don't wanna say. Oh, I was working on it, by the way, I was working, I got something out of New Jokes, two that may be something. I was working on that one about,

we were riffing the other day about knowing, how knowing sucks. Knowing is bad, because you know, you eat a tuna melt, right, you feel great, then you see the calories, you're like, fuck, I ruined it, I know. It's like, you ever date you see the calories, you're like, fuck. I ruined it, I know. It's like you ever date someone early on and you're like, this is amazing.

Then you get to know them, not as good. Oh. Something there, I'll play with that. Yes. I had something else too about- What was the thing we couldn't remember that he gave you the clip on? Oh, it was just about that.

Oh, okay, okay. Yeah, yeah. Because I was racking my brain, I couldn't think of it. I got other bits, but I have a peeve too. Hit me with a peeve. If a friend hit you up, they're from out of town, they go, let's hang out, I'm in town, I leave tomorrow. Ah, now you got a deadlock.

So I got 90 minutes notice, or I'm a bad friend? You're the bad friend, give me notice. Notice, it's like an action movie. So here's what I said. Hang out with Bill, sorry. So ransom. Yeah. No, this is what I did, it was a good move. I said, I'm going to the cellar,

you're welcome to meet me. Oh, that is good. And the ball's in his court and he didn't come, so he's the bad friend. So not only do you have to meet him with a shot clock, you gotta go where he wants to go. Exactly. That's no bueno. Related is, hey, we're both gonna be in Portland,

let's hang out. Ugh. That's what it's like, we don't hang out in New York, why would we hang out in Portland? That's a good point. Yeah, California. That's a good point, yeah. On the West Coast, we're friends all of a sudden?

I had this exact thing happen to me, I'm scared to say it, because he might hear it, I don't wanna be mean. Who cares? I don't wanna be mean to the guy. Yeah, same here. All right, well. No, I just say it.

This guy, I don't wanna say this guy sucks. But this guy is in a band at one of the comedy clubs, he plays in the band, never had a conversation with this guy, never, I don't know the guy's name. Yeah, he calls or he texts me, he goes, I got your number from so and so, I'm in Little Rock, let's hang out. And I'm like, now I pull this one.

I go, how many tickets you need? I got you, baby. That's smart. Get him in the show, got him free tickets, bring a friend, I'm off the hook. And he goes, great, I need two, that means the world to me. I go, oh, you got it. Then he goes, what are you doing after?

And I do the whole bullshit of like, well, you gotta settle up and I gotta sign some autographs, I gotta do some promo shoots and whatever, collect my merch. A lot of autographs in Little Rock. Yeah. It's a big line. Who am I, Clinton? So, I do the meet and greet after, you know, you're meeting some people.

This guy barges, he's texting me the whole time, where are you, let's hang out, where are you at, they won't let me back in, they kicked me out, they tased me, like everything's getting crazier and crazier. I've been kidnapped. Yeah, finally the door kicks open. It's this guy with like three security guards like sir You can't go in there, and I'm like oh, he's alright. He's cool So he barged his way in now We have to hang out and I'm with all the fans and everything or you know pod people and it was awkward damn So he this guy was not taking no for an answer

I think when you live in Little Rock and anybody you've ever seen before is there, you gotta show up. He friendship raped you. Yes! It's a friendship rape. That's good. He wouldn't take no for an answer. You're right.

But you gave him, you know, you gave him a little bit of hope. What was I wearing? What were you wearing? You invited him to the show. I know, I let him on a little. If I'm a cop and there's a friendship rape, you did invite him in. You're right.

Now can I get a friendship abortion? In the world of friendship rape. Not in Arkansas. Or Texas. Can't you get a board in Arkansas? I don't think so. I'm not sure though. It feels like you shouldn't be able to.

Right. Well then I gotta make a phone call. Yeah, so does Bill Clinton. Yeah, I went on stage and said, Bill Clinton, and I went, woo, and I went, he's the white P. Diddy, and they went, boo. We had a good time. They love Bill Clinton.

The airport's named after him, and the library is named after Bill Clinton. The airport's named after him, but he flies in on a different plane. Ah, damn, I should've said that. That's good. You know who died at Little Rock or died in Arkansas? Bill Hicks. Oh. Died in, that's a road comic. Died in Arkansas. Bill Hicks was a fucking comic. Wait, at a hospital he was touring and he died? He had cancer. But I mean he was touring up until he died? He toured pretty late but I don't know the-

I think he stopped at the end. There was a part in one of the books where he like had to get helped off stage because he was so weak. I mean you fucking cancer. Yep There is same cancer that killed Steve Jobs lung pancreas. Oh, I thought it was long pancreas Wow I'm pretty I'm pretty sure I'll look it up, but it doesn't really do anything right Thank you. It's cancer. You're thinking of the spleen. No, it's like something appendix maybe was appendix appendix It's you can take that out Which is weird that we have body parts you can take out. Isn't that strange? Never thought about that. Why do I have it if it doesn't serve a purpose? They theorize that it's a leftover stomach. Whoa.

Like that we probably once had two to process different foods and then we're like, we don't do that anymore. Whoa. Interesting. You got any other peeves? I had one and now I forgot it. Let me see what I have. Maybe it'll come back to me. I thought I wrote down two. Fuck. I got nothing. I got some joke ideas. I'm not fucking... Man, do you see this actor Michael Stolbar got a rock thrown at him by a crazy person in Central Park? What? Never heard of this guy. Oh, you know this actor, Michael Stolbar, got a rock thrown at him by a crazy person in Central Park? No. What? Never heard of this guy.

Oh, you know this actor. He's in A Serious Man. You've seen him in a ton of stuff. He's a lead in the Coen Brothers movie, A Serious Man. Uh, wait, is that the Jewish one? He looks like... Yeah. Yes! That's a great movie. Yeah, you've seen this dude. Pull up his... Oh yeah, he's good. Yeah, he's really good.

What happened? Just somebody didn't like the look? I mean, there's crazy people. Yeah, I guess so. It's New good. What happened to somebody didn't like the look I mean there's crazy people Yeah, I guess New York still New York, and it wasn't like a targeted. I was a homeless guy I just chucked a rock in the back of his head. Is he okay? He's fine But it's like the second instance of a Broadway actor being just randomly attacked by a crazy homeless this week whoa And this guy had like 17 priors for similar shit well the rule if you assault someone without a gun you get out bail reform well he we can talk

to our guest about this yes but also he I saw one of the I'll read the comments on these sometimes there's the New York Post comments are so funny oh yeah someone wrote so what actor shouldn't receive preferential treatment Getting hit by rocks. That's preferential. I don't think anyone should get hit by a rock. That's a bit Yeah, maybe there's a bit that's I'll play with it. Yes. Let's play with it You're right. I should warn the guests are or I should warn the listeners our guesses mayor Adams. He's coming We got a bone to pick Wow Wow, poor guy. Well, we hope you pulled through Mike. There he is. That was a good movie. This is one of my favorite

Coen Brothers movies. Really? Yeah. Serious man? Yeah. Yeah, it was good. Yeah. Yeah. I mean they rarely miss. They don't miss. They're pretty great. Ah, that Clooney one was tough. Which one? Intolerable Cruelty. They just wrote that, but that was pretty fun I thought. That was like a throwback Cary Grant type Combo that was kind of fun. It was a hail Caesar. I didn't love that. I didn't like that either, but I love moments I thought intolerable cruelty had moments for sure and Richard Jenkins good cast Yeah, you gotta love Jenkins always good. Billy Bob Catherine Zeta was so freaking hot in that movie Billy Bob from Little Rock Yeah, put that in the pipe and smoke it man

He's been in some I mean we got I feel like the way we talk about paper plan on this pod was the way people Were tagging me and a simple plan. Oh, yeah. People love that movie. That's a great fucking movie And the other one he did I don't know if I talked about in the pod one false move It's on it's also Billy Bob and Bill Paxson. It's another it's another 90s more. It's fucking great. All right Yeah, even the wife who's bored out of her mind on any good movie loved a simple plan so good I put Godfather on she's out. She'll divorce me Godfather's a slower burn It is but you know, it's a classic one of the best things ever made. Yeah, it's it's a three and a half hour flick Well that tick-tock is just so alluring, you know? It's like everything this movie isn't,

this movie is slow, dark, you know, moody. TikTok is quick, fun, and you know, it lights up your brain in a way different. It's like an instant dopamine rush. There you go. But then, man, you don't remember the TikToks. Exactly. You remember a great movie experience.

You remember a great like, you know, book. You remember that, you don't remember the TikToks. You remember a great movie experience. You remember a great book. You remember that you don't remember the top 30 burgers in downtown Manhattan. Yeah, right, right. You remember your favorite movies and you revisit them and you see different things. It's just, you know, I have to catch myself in it sometimes. Of course.

Like even last night I was like gonna think, I was thinking about throwing on a movie with subtitles because I was flipping on criteria on it and then I was like, I don was thinking about throwing on a movie with subtitles I was flipping on criteria on and then I was like I Don't know if I have the attention span right now. I'm kind of tired and I'm like no fuck me get in do it It'll enrich your life good for you, and I didn't do it. I watched the car Yeah, well still a great film and it was a good and then I watched it. I was so into it It's such a you know uneasy movie Yeah, tense tense as hell that I I was like I could have done such an uneasy movie. Yeah, tense. Tense as hell, that I was like,

I could have done this for another movie. Yeah, yeah, you're right. You just gotta give yourself to it. You gotta give. That's the hard part, these youngsters, they can't get over that little hump of boredom. Once you get over that hump. Some of them can. Some of them can, but I shouldn't generalize,

but I think the TikTok generation is so used to instant gratification That I think if you could teach a kid to get over that hump you could really get somewhere It's it's like Reese's versus stew. You get a nice hearty stew. That's the cardio This is a fucking breakfast cereal pumped with chemicals and sugar. So you're not gonna see Jerry's new pop-tarts movie Not at all. Oh, no, I can't wait. let me pee real quick before I guess all right fucking it's your burnout friends favorite holiday 420 celebrate with our friends at Diet Smoke Diet Smoke has sold over 10 million THC gummies across the US for a reason with strengths from 10 milligram to 200 per serving Diet Smoke

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Your partner, well thank you. Mando. We're here with our guest. Sorry guys. Andrew Yang. We're here with our guest. Sorry guys. Andrew Yang, no. Keep it loose. Coming through, yeah. Hey guys, I hear there's drinking on this podcast.

Yes. You don't drink though, right? Maybe some cursing. Yes, whatever you want. A few bucks given here and there. Do you drink or no? I don't really drink very much. I'm one of those people that if I drink I go to sleep.

Ah-ha. It's probably a good thing in the scheme of things. Yeah, lucky you. It keeps me up all night. And the blow. This might be why you lost. You're dressed like hell. Come on, man! I'm just kidding. I could have gone either way. I thought if I had like a jacket on I'd feel very out of place. That's true. You did the right thing.

How would you be doing things differently? We were just talking about that. If I had like, you know, jacket on, I'd feel very out of place. That's true, you did the right thing. How would you be doing things differently? We were just talking about that, you could have won this, you could have been mayor of New York. Yeah. You could have been in charge of the shithole. I do things exactly the same as Eric Adler. We were just talking about how a crazy guy threw a rock at the actor Michael Stolberg, you heard about that? No, I haven't heard the story. Yeah, this happened

Getting ugly there. Fix me up. What do you think about because like we travel we see the road all the time We see a lot of cities. Yeah, totally or you know a lot of people are on drugs a lot of people don't feel safe I mean, I feel fine New York. I love New York, but that's the reputation right sure Well, I will say I mean I lived here for a long time and the vibe is different Like even if nothing happens to you you're like I feel like something could have happened Yeah, and then and then things do happen like I've had friends Have weird shit go down in a way that might not have been the case. You know let's call it five years ago Yeah, definitely well

There was a box cutter you see it on the subway a guy had a box cutter He cut a lady then the National Guard was in the subway I don't know a week ago two weeks ago sure aren't they still there mean nothing's changed right? They're not at my stop I could use them Yeah, maybe they rotate yeah We use the same stop sometimes and that stop is not yeah, it's dicey lot of care. Have you stop? It's two floors of horse. I mean yeah, it's West Forth. You know is not, it's dicey. It's a six avenue stop. It's two floors of horrors. I mean, it's West Forth, you know, so it's.

That's a big stop, yeah. Oh yeah. A lot of lines come through. Sam, do you remember in the 90s when you had to carry around Muggers money? Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Like a fake wallet, you'd be like, here you go?

Yeah. Quinn's got a great joke about that. What does he say? Well, they'd rob you, Colin Quinn is a bit, where they rob you and they'd be like, I don't any money. You go, but you got your mugger money. He's like oh yeah of course, here. You know, had to have your mugger money. You're an upstate guy right? Well I was born in Schenectady, my dad worked for GE and then moved to IBM and it's very nerdy sounding I know. Sorry guys. Let it out. But I grew up in Schenectady and then Westchester County.

So, you know, New York product in terms of Z100 and the Knicks. Knicks or Knicks? So okay, I was a hardcore Knicks fan until they dropped Jeremy Lin. And you can imagine the feelings you would have as the Asian American Knicks fan who Jeremy Lin was your shining light

and then drop him over money. It would seem like the biggest bullshit in the world. Yeah, the Rockets gave him a contract and the Knicks said, okay, we're not gonna match that. They let him go, yeah. I mean, this is the franchise that gave Jerome James 30 million. That's like 20 years ago.

You're bringing up a lot of old stuff here. No, like the Knicks do not lose people because they get paid but on this one they were like oh we're gonna let this guy go even though he was you know the best part of being a Knicks fan for X years. He was awesome. That was a magical two weeks but two weeks was that it? It was when Sandy went for two weeks I loved it but it wasn't like it was a hot moment I'll tell you that. I wanted him as a Nick For sure. Yeah. Yeah, I mean he was ours. He's come to the cellar before he's a great guy. He's very cool

It does it is kind of a flex to say when I ran for president Yeah, it's pretty cool. Sounds good. It does sound I mean, how do you how do you just say I'm gonna run? Like what's the process? Well, believe it or not anyone can run if they're 35 years or older and born in the US. Those are the only two rules. And so there's absolutely nothing stopping the Norman moral ticket circa. It's a little late for 24, but 28.

Yeah. Or you could reverse. Everyone will be drunk. Moral Norman. You could run on whatever platform you want. Okay. But those are the only rules, guys, legit. Now, the two-party system has kind of locked up the process, so it's a little bit trickier

than all that. In my case, I ran as a Democrat and had to get polling at a certain level. I actually talk about this in my last, because I'm a serial entrepreneur, and I just saw it as an entrepreneurship challenge. It was like, okay, how do you get on the ballot? How do you get on the debate stage? How do you raise the money to compete, et cetera, et cetera? And believe it or not, there are a lot of parallels

between that process and what you guys do. I think there are three overlapping fields. I try and explain this to people. Politics, comedy, professional wrestling. Those three things intersect in very serious ways. Jesse Ventura, I mean Trump was a fucking wrestling villain if you actually remember. Kind of anti-hero hanging out with McMahon and the crew.

Yeah, old shit chest McMahon. People talk about The Rock all the time running for president. I mean, it's in part because he can just go in and command a crowd. Guys, I was at a number of political events, and literally they would say, 60 seconds go, and you're essentially cutting a wrestling promo

in front of a bunch of people. So my wrestling fandom really paid off because I would channel DDP or The Rock or whoever the fuck in that moment. But when you're a comedian, it's very similar where you get in front of people. Now you guys are big time, so people who come to your shows actually know and like you, but a lot of the time

you are in front of people who don't know who you are from Adam, and then you give a talk, or you know, I mean you try and catalyze emotions in them, so in that case it's humor, in my case I actually did use humor sometimes, and then you literally- Inspire hope though too, you gotta use hope. Hope sometimes, sure. Yeah. And change. And then you inspire them, and then you're literally like,

hey, I'm Andrew Yang, I'm running for president, I'll be back. And then you come back and you hope the crowd's a little bigger. I'm sure that sounds pretty familiar to you guys. You do the road, you build your audience. So I worked bars, bowling alleys, like you name it.

So did we. In Iowa and New Hampshire. What's the worst crowd you ever had? I mean, I had some terrible crowds. You're getting heckled a lot? What's fun, though, is most of the people in Iowa and New Hampshire, which are the main early states I campaigned, and I campaigned all over the place, but last cycle,

it was Iowa and New Hampshire. They're very friendly. They're very generous and cordial. If you meet folks in these environments, and by the way, I also say to folks, it's like you know who understands how most of America functions? Comedians, road comedians.

You got that right. Because you guys go in front of crowds all over the country. It's a focus group. Yes, I mean it's one reason why Trump is as prominent as he is. He's essentially an insult comic, Right. Political figure plus media figure plus everything, like kind of, plus pro wrestling villain,

all lumped together and he's become this movement leader essentially in a way that the system doesn't know what to do with. He works out, his nicknames, he works them out. I see him working them out where he's like, he'll be like, fat Ron DeSantis and he gets nothing. Then he's like, meatball Ron. And I get to laugh, he's like, that's in the act.

Yes, yes, he workshops. Yeah, he workshops it and then when he finds something that clicks, he's like, okay. Sleepy Joe is big for him. That was a big. Yeah, Crooked Hillary. He also used Twitter slash X as a focus group too. You would hit it and be like, ooh, that touches the nerve and then we're just gonna use that again.

He plays the median a particular way. So there's a lot of parallel. I say to folks too, I talk to comedians, I'm friends with different comedians, and I say, okay, which comedian would you nominate to run? And so who do you think they are they they John Stewart probably Bill Cosby? Get him out of jail He's a too old or they pulled him out. He's touring I gotta say I did see a bill Cosby

He's actually had a John Stewart benefit. It was like The warrior project is before we all knew he was yeah, you know a sicko and everything So he but he's there and then he did an act And it was the darkest act of all time bill bill Cosby's right, but no It was and you were kind of waiting to laugh, but you're like this is just dark and disturbing whoa It's what kind of material we talking I mean shit. I it's probably on tape somewhere It's not like a Jon Stewart, maybe it was Wounded Warrior or The Mission Continues.

You put the pill in the drink. Yeah, so it was before that was, frankly, like we were sure. I think it was even before he was accused. It was like X years ago. Okay. But it was a very, you guys know too, and this is one of the things I love about comedy, is that when a comedian gets up there,

and you can kind of sense sometimes when they're in a dark place. Oh, sure, sure, yeah. You guys even do. 100%. It's like you're up there, you do your bit, but. Yeah, well we do it every night. I mean, we do comedy every night,

so you're not in a good mood every night. Totally. But then they're like, but be real on stage. Like, well real, I'm gonna fake it a little bit because I want it to be a good show. Yeah, I mean remember those Ralphie May years, he was going through a divorce and it was dark. You could see it coming out of him.

Yeah, you can see the darkness. Bill Cosby was emanating darkness at this time. I mean he was probably on the cusp of being outed or accused. But you talk about the performative element when you guys That's gonna be hard to do comedy with 63 women are about to come forward showtime. Yeah, yeah, that's the way it so The performative aspect you did you just described?

Sam where it's like I'm in a shitty mood, but you're not here for my shitty mood you're here for some laughs So let's give it to you. yeah same thing in politics like you know I just got bad news or you know like something like something's bad with my kids or whatever the heck and then you're in front of a group of 50 you know early voters and yeah and like they're not there for your you know personal shit they're there for the uplifted inspiration so then we can put it on the best example that is w bush when the 9-eleven happened he kept reading the kids book. He was like ah Yeah, so the hub bunny hops twice or whatever they need to know how it ended. Yeah, that's true. That's true Second tower that's how it ended

But you so you do have kind of this automaton streak going. Automaton? I don't know that transformer. Or, uh. What's automaton? Or performative. I see. You just are like, OK, I've got the role I'm going to inhabit for this period,

and then whatever goes on, you're like, I'm in it. It's one reason why people are mistrusting politicians, because we kind of sense that there's this performance layer affect that they have on all the time. It's like, okay, what's really going on underneath there? It's ironic, because if they didn't do it, they would lose. But you have to do it, and then you get calling phony. But Trump didn't do it and he won.

I feel like that's how Trump destroyed Jeb Bush. He was like, look at this guy, he's so scripted. He just leveled him, right? I mean, that was. Yeah, but I think there's also a side of Trump where he's like I'm doing this all for America and the common man And you're like you don't give a shit about the common man right so I think there is a little bit of veneer But he is definitely the most honest so far. Yeah, he manages to give off this quote-unquote authenticity You know even as he's bullshitting

Well Fred Thompson used to do that, right? He would show up, he would take a limo to a pickup truck to take the pickup truck to his supporters. Oh, right. To show like he's a common man. That's hilarious. I mean, it's like the oldest trick in the book. Like, Trump's obviously flying private,

he's doing these arena gigs, right? Yes. That was one of his innovations, too. It's like, instead of retail politicking in the innovations too. It's like instead of retail Politicking in the early states. It's like look. I'm just gonna do the airplane hangar land on my plane I'm not gonna sleep in your fucking state. I'm gonna get back on my plane To my golden tower same night because that that's the way I roll and Jacksonville, Florida one of the best cities I'm leaving immediately, but I love this city

It's like my place right there. I'm leaving immediately, but I love this city. Exactly. It's like my plane's right there. I got off and I'll be get back on, I'm gonna fly off while you guys wait. You know, they were there. I have to get a little Politico on you, but isn't it a little weird that back in the 60s and whatnot, it was super democratic,

John F. Kennedy's going to the West Virginia to talk to the coal miners, and they were all, the blue collar were voting blue. I've heard you talk about that and then it flipped I've heard you say you know how it's read the blue collar vote used to be the Democrat sure yeah now It's all it feels like it's all red out there in the the auto workers and all that the construction Oh the unions are interesting because the unions all have endorsed the Democrats, but then their membership does not vote endorsed the Democrats but then their membership does not vote. Oh the memberships like hey all right endorse whoever you want I'm gonna vote for

Trump and and you can see that up and down different industries like that's interesting. The rank-and-file are gonna vote. Do endorsements do anything I've heard people say like if Taylor Swift came out and endorsed Biden it would it would swing things but would it? It would help. I feel like people already know kind of where she stands on stuff. So what does that really do? Do you think that would be impactful? It's interesting, man,

cause when I ran for president, I got various endorsements. Who was your biggest one that you were like, was it Chappelle? I think Chappelle, objectively. That's a big one. That's a big one. But I'll say this too.

That must have felt pretty good, right? One reason why I will always be grateful I don't know if I should appell objectively. That's a big one. That's objectively. It's a big one. But I'll say this too. That must have felt pretty good, right? One reason why I will always be grateful to Dave is that a lot of celebrities, so I get together with him and he's like, you know, universal basic income makes sense to me. It would help all the folks in Ohio where I live. I'm gonna support you.

And then a celebrity says that and you're like, oh, well thank you. You have no idea what that means. And then a celebrity says that and you're like, oh well thank you, I have no idea what that means. And then in Dave's case what that means is, I'm gonna roll up to Iowa while you're campaigning in Iowa, shoot like rush hour themed videos with you, and then perform to a sold out stadium in Ames, and then donate all the money from that show

to your campaign, like, associated entities. And then do six hours on stage, and he's like, wait, what was I here again? Yeah, right. So Dave actually freaking rolled up his sleeves. He then went to South Carolina, and then made calls to South Carolina voters on my behalf, like, did another show,

donated the money to the entities. So, I mean, he freaking grounded out in a way that, you know, would be stunning to anyone who, I mean, because most celebrities don't want to do anything that's going to, like, require lots of time and energy, but also they don't want to take, like, a risk in that way. And then Dave just said, look, look like this guy's talking about things that would help the people around me so I'm gonna actually go to the early

states I mean it was something I'll never forget Wow he's like I will give you money I will support you just work on this trans bathroom law. I don't remember that. Just joking Dave. Comedian the comedian Yeah, you guys are probably running the same Every love comedian I know knows every other comedian. Yeah, there's all the same everybody. Yeah, it's good times that way So is him? And we're probably that way with most politicians you I would assume you know most of them, right? Mmm. Yeah, I mean I am friendly with just about all of them. It's true the ones you would expect um

But I also got endorsed by Norm MacDonald around the same pure. I was like super grateful for that right there my hero Yeah, he's awesome really. Yeah, wow you know I couldn't drive I Didn't know that yeah, he's like a brilliant idiot. You know he can't drive he lived with his mom I lived in a studio apartment in LA, but brilliant guy, but you know gambling addiction What did he say to you? He took a gamble on you. Yeah, he took a gamble on me He was he said and he was great even after the campaign ended he was like You know Andrew you're ahead of your time So he is no one're ahead of your time. People catch up. So he is.

No one was ahead of his time. Agreed. Yeah, he was that. So folks like that, it was really awesome because there were people that I admired from afar and then getting to know some of them and then having them get behind me. So where the fuck were you guys?

I was on the Yank Train. I was paying attention. I was on there. I'm a fan. I'm waiting for you. What year were you guys? I was on the Yanktree. I was paying attention. I was on there. I'm a fan. I'm 20. What year were you on, 16? 20. 20, so.

Oh, tough year. Yeah, it was a tough year. We wouldn't have made a big dent, I don't think, for you back then. No, I was on board. I was all in right away. That's awesome that you guys have had this ascent over this last number of years.

Yeah. It was great. As you said, it takes a while. You do your thing and you're on the road and we always quote Bill Burr, he would call it killing in obscurity. Yes. That sounds right.

We're hidden in the middle of the country and we're like, why does no one know who the fuck we are? And then, you know, but then you also have those nights where you're like, people should not know who we are. Sure. I'm glad no one was here to see this one. I had one of those last night. Mark followed me at the cellar.

I'm doing all new Yourself well you got to be hard on yourself to write new shit Oh, dude the new shit too because it was not going over while you're like fuck. Let me just like take out an old reliable I did that on one Joe I got mad at the crowd I did it I said better I bet you'll laugh at a dick joke and I did nice joke and it hit and I was like I knew it Yeah, and it's bittersweet cuz you're like hey that hit but also does that mean my old stuff is better than my new stuff? Well of course it is I just burned a special.

And you're better at it too. Yes! But no the old stuff I just burned an hour so you have to start you know the process you start fresh a new hour and it's like it's humbling man. Someone I just saw like I saw Michelle Wolf working out some material sure and it was hysterical because it was going over terribly I was like I do not care. She has big ideas So she'll stick with it. I mean he's ambitious with her material, but for some reason it was just really funny How little she cared?

How little she cared? That she shows you didn't care, but she's a real comic so she definitely cared off off stage. I'm sure she was like fuck Just working the materials actually at Dave's Nice you know that they like named a house after her you know Like it in jest but kind of for real cuz she got stuck there during kovat that's right so she Stuck a comedy sleepaway camp and she got stuck a company sleepaway camp in Ohio for months and we all got stuck somewhere I'd rather be there than I was here. I mean I live in a fucking shoebox You know in New York I was in LA I mean, I live in a fucking shoe box, you know, in New York. I was in LA for a while and that wasn't fun either.

I mean, there was no good place to be doing that. Maybe Florida was fun. Florida, Texas. But then you got COVID. Sure, but I got it here anyway. Exactly. So. That was a long time.

Yeah, I went to that sleepaway camp during that time and Michelle bought like a Vespa, like a European style Vespa, it was just freaking cruising around the roads and cornfields in Ohio. See, that's living. And it seemed awesome, honestly. Yeah!

And then I got on the Vespa, I was like, hey, and I tried, did it on, everyone got so nervous, I was like, what the fuck? You think I'm gonna wreck this thing? Like, what the hell? Asian driver. I'm cruising. Yeah, no, I took a little offense down there.

Yeah. It was fine, but that was like a period when I was still I'd nearly got it Biden nearly got assassinated by a Schwinn. So we all saw that Go off that bike. Remember that that's right. That didn't look good. It did not look good Yeah, I always I saw those photos from that sleepaway camp. It's like John Stewart Jim Carrey David Letterman you Chappelle It was like all these killers and like giant celebrities. I remember being like, oh, I'm stuck in this fucking apartment.

It must be so fun to be out there. You know, he would have you guys out there in a heartbeat this summer if you guys wanna go. He actually texted me. I was in Ohio and he texted me. He's like, why do you wanna come? And I was already flying back. And I was like, oh, I wish.

Well, you know, he just opened a club there. That's what I hear. So he would love to have you guys go and just kill for Anytime, you know be killing it about four or five months. Not not yet. I'm down Yeah, you know now may just work shit out like that. That's one of the things about his club I don't think his club is like finished product, you know only Like I think people are going there to work shit out. I'm actually going there next week. Oh

Really? No, what are gonna? Do a political set? I mean I I've I show up and just tell jokes that I have nothing to do with politics Happily really you really yeah Working on any bit yeah, can we hit it here a few zingers? You have to give away your gold here, but if you like quickie I'll make you guys a deal like I'll just come by and work some shit out at the clubs here in New York Hey, I run a show at two shows at one. I know one at New York Comedy Club You know what I mean, and then it's open door. Are you gonna run for mayor again? You know there's a bit of time before I have to make that decision. We could use you

Yeah, I mean people come up to me every day on the street be like dude this guy's terrible I was joking that if I were to run for mayor in 25 my slogan would be fuck this guy I think you would win off that yeah, cuz everyone's like man fuck this guy like people literally just come up to me on the street I'm just like fuck this guy So what would you be doing differently? Oh I had one for Anthony Weiner to use. Fuck these dads. So what would you be doing differently? Uh oh.

So part of the problem with Eric Adams, one, he hires cronies for all these jobs where you're like, why is that person in that role? I think that's disgusting. Anyway, Salakix, what do you think? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Oh, yeah, so that that's issue one Number two is you can tell the guys just You know high in his own Profile majesty whatever like it's really irritating and what shitty policies do you have that you could fix?

I'll reform the single biggest thing that that Upsets me is that in part because he hires folks that aren't necessarily Super on the ball a lot of the agencies are under delivering on the basics like I look at the stats around who gets Let's call it money. They're entitled to like aid. They're entitled to food They're entitled to the measurements have all gone the wrong direction entitled to, food they're entitled to. The measurements have all gone the wrong direction. And so if you have the resources, and it's literally your job and responsibility to deliver them, and then you're not delivering them

promptly and reliably, then people are just throwing their hands up. And that erodes trust pretty quick. So that to me is job one. If you're not delivering on the basics like that, some of the stuff that's happening, frankly, and I do have this projection sometimes, obviously, because you run for mayor and you think wow you know what would I be doing and then I'll tell you guys A couple jokes so when so when you run for mayor

Cops come up to all the time be like hey Yang if you win I want on the security detail Because it's full-time pay for I think it's either two or three days because they rotate on and off. And so I was joking that we'd have a cumte to decide who's on my security detail and like no guns, they'd all carry like nunchucks. And stuff. That'd help. Asianize it.

I'd help. I like that. I'd help like the. That'd be kind of intimidating honestly. Yeah. It'd be dope. Some guy tries to assassinate you, he takes a ninja star to the face right yeah, just had to have like just have a bunch of

You know MMA types. I'll walk around me all the time. I mean I oh yeah, I went to I mean in a number of I actually got endorsed by the police captains on the firefighters last time and the Guys are such a bunch of stuff mayor Adams is a former cop. That's gotta hurt, right? Well, and this did tick me off, guys, because I got endorsed by the police captains. And then I'm like, hey, guys, you realize that Eric Adams is a former police captain, and this guy's just endorsed me.

So what the hell does that tell you? And that did not get, in my opinion, like an appropriate level of coverage. Ha ha ha, yeah, yeah. Maybe you'll get coverage here and get you some momentum in the next race. Also, I think the cops are a little peeved, a little bitter about the whole defund.

Well, another thing that I would do differently is that right now the next number of police academy classes are Not even confirmed yet, and we're now yes, we're down At least a thousand cops and folks who hit a certain point Say like I'm out and then some people who are actually just starting out or saying I'm out Wow So if I were mayor right now I would literally just everywhere I went be like, if you want to serve New York, we need you.

We need you to come and serve and protect and be the kind of police officer you want to see in your neighborhoods. Like please, please join the NYPD. And I'd just be a freaking recruitment billboard everywhere I went. Because if you look at what's going on with cop enrollment right now, it's going down, retention is going down. The tragic death the, it's going down, retention's going down, the tragic death the other day is gonna hurt at this level.

I attended a cop's funeral when I was running for mayor and you see how much they feel it. And a lot of folks are looking up saying, wait, I can actually become a cop in another community and it's a better situation. I can actually become a cop in another community and it's a better situation. And that's what you have to prevent really because you can't have cops leaving and then not replace them.

You gotta work on your act. This is bombing. No. But no, you're right. You're 100% right. What incentive do you have to be a cop right now? Give us a sales pitch. What incentive do you have to be with the NYPD right now?

The impoverished neighborhoods get hurt the most by the no cop. Well, you're talking about from the person's perspective and you have to say, look, there's a good career here. A really good, stable career. And the truth is that you get a pension of 50% of your salary after 20 years of service. And so there are folks, by the way,

one of the stats that scares the shit out of me is that like 90% plus of the cops who are hitting the 20 year mark are saying, okay, I've done it, I'm out. Which in a way is understandable, but in a way you're like, okay, I'm losing like all my experienced cops. So I get that mark.

We need some Dennis Franz, NYPD blue type cops. You need some grizzled veterans. Yeah. I've seen this before. You need that guy. But if you were to say to someone, it's like, look, you put in 20 years and then you'll get half your salary

for the rest of your life and you go to a young person, that's actually a fairly unusually good situation for a lot. Yeah, because you know you start Let's say in your mid 20s. I mean I don't know how old you guys are but like you know imagine being able to quote-unquote Quasi-retire in your mid 40s. I mean that's yeah, but you don't want to get them on money You don't want to get them on a good you need Cops need sponsors you got to get him like a deal with fan duel or something they get like some fan duel Cops need sponsors. You got to get them like a deal with fan door or something They get like some fan duel credits some Bitcoin

Can't just be the pension need other benefits. I copy putting your life at risk I want do you want a free 500 Nick's Pacers tonight, dude? I mean we done and done where we'd be like hey look every Nice game that's game. That's game. I'm a Mets fan You know, we'll have like the allotment. I'm sure this stuff's already happening I mean though the Union's probably on this one The other thing is I talked to a lot of cops during the race and after and You know morale is a real thing. I'm morale big so if you just came in and we're like look guys like

City is with you city has your back. Yeah Because one of the problems they have is like look if I arrest some Clown or drunk or whatever like half the time. I'm might get both of us I might get hurt, but then someone might Record me like subduing the person after they Record me like subduing the person after they Crazy yeah, and so that there's like a lot of bad incentives right now in the system And so you have to try and build a morale and say look guys like do the right thing for the city We'll have your back here here. Yeah, cuz cops used to be high-fived

You know and now and I I think cops everywhere I go like I say and I got to say too a lot of them recognize me So then oh, yeah I see cops everywhere I go. Like I see cops, and I got to say too, a lot of them recognize me, so then it's like, you know, it's a good feeling. Linsanity. They have it everywhere I go. Yeah, yeah, that is nice. And cops love comedy. Cops are the best crowds. They're good crowds.

Because I- I got a PBA card, because I killed him from a cop show. There you go. That must have felt great. It did feel good. He was like, just don't use it if, I was like, this works?

He goes, yeah, just don't use it if you have a child sex dungeon. I'm like, yeah, just don't use it if you have a child sex dungeon. I'm like, yeah, I don't think that would get me out of it. Child sex dungeon, oh, you're one of us? Yeah. I'm running a child sex dungeon, I'm like, not so fast, officer. I have this card.

And there's definitely bad apples, but there's bad apples in everything, but this is bad apples where it could kill somebody. Yeah, no, Rock's got that great bit about, you know, it's kind of, being a cop, it's like being a pilot. Yes. You kind of got to be perfect. Right, right. You know? Yeah, you want good ones. You want ones that have the right motivation, the right character, the right makeup, you know, like come in. And then, you know, like if they're hopefully even making things better in their own neighborhoods sometimes. Oh, yeah. What, give me some peeves about, like just general day to day peeves. What bothers you?

Yeah, I mean it's usual New York stuff, man. I mean, like you're out and about and I mean sometimes things are happening or not happening. You're like, ah, you know, I don't remember this trash pile being quite so big. Oh yeah, a lot of trash piles in this town. And then when you're walking by a trash pile at night you're like here come the rats It's gonna run right over my foot every single time and you know it's like a scene of the Lion King, but it's just all right

The remake Disney live-action What what did you know Anthony wiener at all I? Did not know Anthony that was crazy. You were on that text thread. I was like Anthony. Don't do it man I know you've got a nice piece. I agree. I know you're proud. Yeah, yeah I mean, you know it's like I do know some of these characters, and on a good day, I actually feel bad for a lot of the folks,

because there's a lot of, I mean, the press does take potshots at people in big ways. Oh yeah. And you know. It was a Neil O'Donnell, who was a guy at MSNBC, he got a little carried away, I thought. With Weiner? Yeah, he just wanted him so hard.

I'm like, all right, the dude's already lost. Isn't it great when the names match up like that? You got Weiner with the big pick. Madoff, Madoff with your money. There's other ones I can't think of right now. Yeah. Shit, sorry. I should have had a think. P Diddle? P Diddle, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, we'll get more. We'll come back. We'll be back. Yeah He's workshopping Yeah, no, I'm with you it is it's it's a sad story for sure But it is crazy that he like rose from the ashes and then just happened again. That was crazy Yeah, you know, I mean people are forgiving too. It's true. This is one of the things also We do need to forgive you're right. Yeah, yeah Well because me we're all human and you see shit like if you look back on it a couple generations ago adultery would you know like on your career and then you know Post Clinton everyone's like yeah, and and part of the reason why Trump is so strong is that

like the things that people are Attacking him for a lot of people look at it and say like yeah, you know Yeah, or like you know that's what rich people do or you know the this and that and folks are losing confidence in the press in various ways You know it's like you look at the relationship with the media, I mean shit. By the way, I also, I mean, I'm friends with a bunch of comedians. You know, I saw Shane Gillis just last week

and like different comedians have run a foul of the machine in various ways. And then you guys know these people and you're like, oh, like what the hell's going on? Like who are they trying to cancel? They're just being period. Well you were a dude who came out in support of Shane when there was a lynch mob after him.

So I'll tell you the story. And by the way, I did this with you guys too. I spent the day looking at your, watching your bits and your comedy, you know, specials. And you guys are funny and smart. It made me really happy to be here with you. So when the news hit about Shane Gillis, I also, first I I was like who the fuck is this guy and then I like started watching His clips and whatnot, and I was like this guy's no malignant like He's like a drunk yeah, he's like a dude from central PA. Who's like you know right dude?

Just like trying Stuff out and a killer comedian. Yeah, I mean, talk about an ascent over this last few years. Oh, yeah. I actually. He's got a scent. Sorry. Smells great.

Shane, you smell great. So I, at the time, and I was one of the people that was personally insulted or attacked in the people that was personally insulted or attacked in the stuff that he was being fired for. So I was like, look, if I can at least come out and say, this dude should not be fired for this. That's good, good, that takes balls. And my team too, at the time, they were like,

you didn't even like, because I was running for president at the time and I had a team. Wow. I was like, whatever guys. I was like, put it out there. And by the way, even at the time, I was like, they're probably gonna fire him anyway,

because from their standpoint, what did they really invested in him at that point? Yeah. Next to nothing. So I was like- And they were hiring an Asian cast member as well, so I wonder if they felt added pressure. Of course, 100%. Maybe, it's a good point.

They should be on the chopping block more than Shane, because you've never had an Asian You've actually done a bad thing. He said a bad thing to me. That's more Offensive I don't either way I don't want anybody to get in fired But I'm just saying if you're if you're comparing the two wrongs to me not having an Asian is worse than Saying a slur is a joke. Oh It goes back to the fact that all these folks are,

you know, it's like, no show's gonna be perfect, no show's gonna be perfect, certainly no comedian. It's a comedy show. But like, for a comedian, in my mind, it's like, a comedian has to go way, way, way out of bounds in my mind, because it's freaking comedy. Like, if you start circumscribing what comedians can say. And I said this on Bill Maher one time,

I was like, look, a comedian's job is not to tell us how to think. Comedians job is just to entertain us, and it's a hard job. So if you then try and give them the responsibility of also telling people not to think, it's like, where the hell does that go? It goes no place.

I can also, context is super important. He said it on a podcast trying to make a joke. Clip. Someone says something in a comedy club, that's the context. Now if I'm saying that on the subway, you might have a problem with me. But also body of work and you just said like, okay, he is, this is who he is. You found one clip where he's not at his best, where he's doing something not good, but he invested in actually looking this guy up, he invested time being like,

no, this is, I think, who this guy is. You can't judge someone by their worst moment and define them by that worst moment. It's fucking insanity. You know, I agree. Yes, 100%. And it doesn't, bear with me here,

but it's like they wanna just take you down more than actually care about the justice of it. Oh yeah, no, they don't care. That's what bugs me. It's like, it's one thing to just take you down more than actually care about the justice of it. Oh yeah, they don't care. That's what bugs me. It's like it's one thing to try to save the world, but you're just doing it to ruin a person. You're not doing it to actually help. It's just like hey, let me get my name out there,

show that I took this guy down, I'm on the right side of history. It's not about helping anybody or people's lives or feelings, it's just about taking someone down. That's what kills me, it's all fake. That's why I respect what Andrew did, because was like, let's have a conversation. Let's be forgiving because I don't know what party you identify with right now, but like you were running

as a Democrat and you don't see that forgiveness model to be something they would subscribe to anymore, you know? Yeah. I mean it used to be the Republicans were the party of kind of like, you're in a lot of trouble, and it kind of switched, you know? Yeah, totally. Like, I saw Bill Burr on Twitter once, somebody called him a racist, and then a guy under it wrote, you know his wife's black, and the guy wrote, fuck you. And you're like, well, I thought you hated racism, so shouldn't you go,

oh shit, never mind, one less racist on the planet, but you're like, damn it, I want to get him. How often on Twitter do you hear, that's good point I know I'm just saying that's not what that's for point is that he was trying to accuse this guy of being a piece of shit right and when he was proven wrong he got mad but you should be like oh I hate racist great he's not racist but they don't they actually want to get you it's not about the racism you're right it's it's like you're trying to checkmate you and when you realize it's not checkmate They're like they flip the fucking board right you should be happy against racism

Yeah, I'd say 80% of its social media agree incentives because you know you do get status and points for Sticking it to someone and I was trying to imagine like if you got rid of X like it's hard to cancel someone because I hate X get rid of it You know it's like how do you even do it? Love it Twitter definitely has You know been a tool for folks who want it can spread try and try and ruin people and by the way It's not just people in entertainment

Oh, yes, I mean there are multiple academics that I know who've had their careers ruined because they put something out on social media. And a part of it too is like, and this is like the messed up mechanics, is like well then just like don't go on social media if you're one of these folks. But then some of the universities are like,

oh no, go on social media because we want you to be part of the conversation. Yeah. What do you want to do? Violence, violence. Yeah, yeah, et cetera, et cetera. So. Have you met Elon Musk? Have you hung out with him?

Sure, he endorsed me in 2022. Oh wow. I had a whole set of really fascinating endorsers in 2020. And did you have any time to hang out with him? Sure, I got a tour of SpaceX. And hung out with him and Grimes. Alright, what about Epstein? Yeah, I missed that one.

We would have all said yes to that plane ride, let's be honest. Before we knew, I mean. I mean, happily, that was before my time. Yeah, this is the sound bite he wants. Andrew Yang says, yes, he would have gone on Epstein's plane. Before. I mean, I would have gone on Epstein's plane. Before. I mean I would have gone to P. Diddy's too. You know five years ago.

Back then I was just a dude. It's a rapper party. You know what's funny is I was telling Dave this when we were hanging out in Iowa. Five years ago I just bought a ticket to see you in Radio City and we were hanging out in Iowa. I was like you know five years ago I just bought a ticket to see you in Radio City and I came out and you know in Iowa together. How do you think we feel? We voted for you for mayor and now you're here and now you're like oh I voted for that guy. I think you should run again. I agree.

Thanks guys. Asians are having a moment. They really are. That's your bumper sticker. Andrew Yang, Asians are having a moment. They really are. That's your bumper sticker. Andrew Yang. Asians are having a moment. Ali Wong, Joe Koi. I feel like this is the time. I think you're a New York guy. You speak to a lot of different types of New Yorkers. I think... Squid Game, Parasite. I mean those aren't all... This is getting worse. Those are Korean. I know it's Korean, but I'm saying Asian. I mean all getting worse those are Korean. I know it's Korea, but I'm saying Asian Shogun is on TV. All right, you're digging deeper

This is your time, baby I mean I do have a bunch of friends who are or getting more work than they that's all said strike while the samurai sword is hot Yeah, we'll be right back I've never seen a silent Sarah Greg coming here so much. No, I think we're on the same page here. Yeah, I mean I do have a lot of friends who are in those shows. They're great shows. I don't see the problem with what I'm saying. Literally I'm like watching them in a show and I'm texting like hey man you're great in this. I watched Shogun last night. I heard it's good. It's pretty good. It's like a Japanese Game of Thrones, I'd say.

Mmm. Yeah Shogun's worth watching. I'm gonna check it out. There pretty good. It's like a Japanese game of Thrones. I'd say mmm Yeah, Shogun's worth watching. I'm gonna check it out. There you go. There's a lot of good stuff man stuff Oh, yeah, so much. I heard this John Wilkes Booth show is amazing really. I haven't heard. I haven't seen it yet Yeah, it's a great premise. It's about him on the run after shooting Lincoln. I mean that's that's fucking good stuff right there We were you worried about getting clipped That's a fear of a politician. Yeah, I know I mean there was the occasional right there. Were you worried about getting clipped? That's a fear of a politician. Yeah. I mean, there was the occasional threat

and then the law enforcement protection if the threat rose to a certain level. Crazy people. Yeah. Any slurs? No, I mean, I didn't actually see some of the Language I would just get word from someone's like hey, there's been a credible threat So you're gonna have like a an extra layer of security. Whoa like that this period the wife hates that Yeah, sometimes they wouldn't tell her because I mean she doesn't need to know that stuff. No, no, that's not gonna help

It's weird. I remember when Obama won there was that thing we were like fuck. I really hope he's gonna be okay It was like that scary moment that once after he was okay. I think there was like a moment We're like alright. I mean you know yeah, I'm sure you're still nervous, but it's well maybe now like you know now you're fine Yeah, and now it's like I mean you know I'm just just a procrastinating Assassinator yeah, I was supposed to do this four years ago and slip my mind Yeah, well Chappelle had that great joke and I killed him softly, which is you know old as shit It's probably 1999 special, but he's like I'm not I want to be a black president so for protection I'll have a Mexican vice president

Ain't that right Santiago see it was a great bit But then we had a black president for two terms, and it was all all fine Yeah, I think not maybe we just didn't know anybody know or hear about any assassination attempts But I think it was gravy everybody liked Obama So like New York too is also like you just don't think of it as like a place where you're gonna get shot I don't know. I hope not says John Lennon. Oh 1980 but all right, you make a good case. So why do you think RFK's not getting

Secret Service protection? Yeah, what's that? What's going on? He's a candidate. No, I actually remember looking into this somewhat when I was a candidate, and they have thresholds and rules. Now, it could also be that they just don't wanna give RFK protection.

He could get assassinated. Yeah. They've had bad luck. He's had it in his family. Yeah. Rule of three's? So I remember when I was running, the rules they set out, they told us were like,

no one gets any security until you're the nominee. Okay. And so we're like, all right, that's one threshold. Now in RFK's case, he's running as an independent, so there's no real nomination. And so what RFK's saying is, look, anyone who polls above a certain threshold should qualify and I think there have been polls that have put him above that threshold. It's pretty legit. And I'm all for people being able to campaign without fear for their safety.

But one of the reasons why I think that, there'd probably be three things that come to mind for me as to why the government would resist. Number one is precedent, which is like any independent candidate who runs and gets above a certain threshold, would be like, hey, now I get Secret Service. Number two is it actually adds legitimacy to that person

because if they're walking around campaigning and then there's Secret Service rotating around, then it seems like awfully presidential. And number three, that protection layer is very, very expensive. Like you're talking about hundreds of thousand dollars a day. Yeah who's paying for that? And so it would be it would be a government expense. Damn. Wow. And so those are I think like the are but or it could just be like you know they don't give a shit and they you know blah blah blah but could you

outsource it get a couple migrants say here's a cool 50 if you, you know, stand near me. I have to say, we outsource everything else. Why not, these guys need work. Yeah. We'll pitch it. I don't know, is that crazy? You know, I mean, I have people in common with RFK, you know, and I'm not an enormous fan of the two-party system delivering what we're here so forward you know so if there is

You know there's a case to be made for him to get protection especially considering his family history Yeah, who do you think he's pulling more votes from? No, I've seen I've seen Trump. I've seen Biden, I've seen no effect. So at this point, it's a little bit of a guessing game, honestly. So you're voting RFK, it sounds like. You know, I'm an anyone but Trump guy, and so anything I'm going to do is going to be to try and minimize the chance of Trump winning. Because I think if Trump gets back in, it's a catastrophe, genuinely. You think he's going to win, though? I think if Trump gets back in it's a catastrophe genuinely. You think he's gonna win though?

I think the elections held today he probably wins. Wow. Wow, there's a sound bite. It's funny, I mean I just first time he won, I didn't really believe he was gonna win but I remember being on the road enough seeing people that really loved him being like, I mean people fucking love him. Yeah. I mean you said like road comics, we see the country.

I'd talk to people and I'd be like, wow they fucking, being Phoenix, they, these people love him. Cops, you talk about the cops, are they? Cops seem to love him. So he's resonating for sure. Yeah, I can give you the math case as to why I think he would win right now.

But like. Michigan? Yeah, so only six states are gonna matter yeah, it's Michigan, Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Arizona, Nevada, Georgia Oh, yeah, and you're thinking about your type of those states But if you look at the numbers in those states Trump is up in all of them right now except for Pennsylvania Which is a toss-up and and some of them well Biden's got history there You know and some of them and some of them Trump's up significantly in like he's up by Eight in one poll I saw in Michigan eight in one poll I saw in, Georgia So you look at that landscape right now and Trump probably wins today, and so the question is

Does that change between now and November Joe's gonna have a lot of? Does that change between now and November Joe's gonna have a lot of money as a financial advantage Does the money move voters in those states the problem is that most people have made up their minds? About seven percent of voters are genuine swing voters and there are a bunch of people in that seven percent who voted for For Trump and then Biden and then now they're like, oh what am I gonna do? Oh interesting and And so those are the voters but only in those six states like you know where we are right now like it's essentially irrelevant. Oh and the left is in a weird spot because they're I feel like they're really zoning in on Trump with like the court stuff and the fees and then maybe going to jail but then they'll do like a

trans visibility day and I think that hurts them. On Easter. On Easter and I think- Yeah but hasn't that been around like a trans visibility day and I think that hurts them. On Easter. On Easter and I think- But hasn't that been around forever? Trans visibility day? Hasn't that been around for years? Yeah, yeah. It's just, it ordinarily just doesn't fall on Easter.

Ah. Well stuff like that people go, I don't give a shit either way, whatever the hell, I don't care, but I'm like, that's gonna hurt them. So stuff like that, I'm like, it's an election year year man if you're trying to win maybe don't do that you want to change the calendar well don't do it on Easter I'm saying do it on the day after Easter I mean to me these issues are so fucking insignificant I agree I'm just I'm talking about the people yeah I think that's a lot of you if you could sway half of that 7% you can win an election that's what I'm

saying like that those little things add up, and he's had other stuff like that and it's like here He goes again, but that's you know. I'm from Louisiana. I hear this shit and going full circle You know who I think speaks to that seven percent comedians genuinely Don't put us on where nobody we're not important. I think the first time we've ever talked politics on the pocket I don't know we try to stay apolitical here, so I apologize for good reason But one thing I'm saying so you know it's politics blah blah blah like in my mind now. It's more about Like do you believe? In institutions or not and what happens is a lot of people who do not believe in institutions actually believe in their favorite comic

They like them they want wanna show up for them. I mean, I see this for different. But don't you think it's a problem like when you watch late night and every single late night host is doing the same joke with the same point of view. And you know, I think there's a need for escapist comedy too.

Definitely. Well, that's what I'm saying. And a lot of that stuff happens on the road and on YouTube So that's one of the things like you're the institutions the institutions include frankly the media networks where the talk shows you're talking about Are on every night? Yeah, and then there's this whole other universe and I think a lot of the folks were talking about the 7% do not listen to TV network a, B, and C. They're listening to podcasts and everything else.

Like you're a podcaster, whomever. By the way, that's how I came up too because I'm running for president. It's 2019. Cable networks essentially want nothing to do with me. So how did I come up? It was Rogan, it was Sam Harris, it was different podcasts.

And then I became a big enough thing where then networks were like, okay, let's have this guy on. He's talking about something interesting. You need credits to get on the network. It's a weird thing where you're like, you need credits to come on, but you're a credit. How do I get the thing to get the thing?

Everyone wants you to have a thing. Oh, it's very circular. And for me, it was wild. And so thank you yang gang if you're listening to this, but So what happened with me was? I got enough support in terms of polling and money where then some of the major networks were like well like let's have this dude on because he

You know made the third debate made the fourth debate like outlasted half a dozen political brand names. And I look back in that time too, and it was funny, is that that campaign was a race against oblivion all the time. Because as soon as you get below a certain threshold, then they kick you off the debate stage, the network's all nothing to do with you, and you disappear.

And so there was a joke with me and my team where I was like the grim reaper of presidential candidates, where after I pass you, you die. And as soon as I pass someone in the polls, they would drop out like the next week. Like there's a joke, it's like, it's all fun and game until Andrew Yang passes you in the polls. So I'd like creep along.

And if you remember that cycle, there were 24 candidates in that field, including fucking Bill de Blasio, if you remember. Wow. Like I ran into him. He got cocky, that guy. I ran into him, and you know, so it's like. He was hated in New York,

and he was like, I should run for president. We were like, no, no, no, you don't understand. We don't like you. Yeah. So there was a massive field. And then I was one of the massive field, and I just kept marching up. But a lot of that was podcasts,

and so there's like this universe. And there's unfortunately this- What was the biggest bump that you first noticed where you were like, holy shit, this is real? I mean, after Rogan, then I would get recognized on the street. Yeah, that was YouTube Rogan. Yeah, that was clearly a massive momentum boost and campaign

changer, really. And we started raising real money. That was early 2019. And then I ended up making the first two debate stages, probably in large part because of Rogan. Yeah, well, you were a numbers guy. And I I think we got to come back to that a little. We need some data. I feel like we're getting a little wishy-washy with everything and it's nice to see some

analytics. Yeah, you know I'm in the camp. We just want shit to work. Yes. We want to solve problems. Like you know whatever the numbers say is going to make the situation better. Let's do that. And you know the Democratic Party sometimes will be like,

oh, that's awesome. It's like, not so much anymore. You guys have a whole other set of things that are animating you that really are not necessarily numbers driven or data driven and the rest of it. The Republican Party, too, by the way, used to have a bunch of folks who are essentially moderate business types who are into that approach to things.

And then that's kind of gotten squeezed out. So I'm with you, like we just, you know math. Let's just make America think harder, let's just fix shit. 42% of the people who supported me in 2020 weren't Democrats. Wow. Part because they were just looking at it being like, this guy, this guy just seems like a business guy

that reminds me of people that I've worked with. Yeah. And you're a normal guy, this guy just seems like a business guy that you know it reminds me of people that I've worked with and yeah like you know and you're a normal guy you don't seem like a swindler like some of these hucksters out there these I wonder if it's weird I wonder if conservatives are more open-minded in that regard because do you think if you ran on the Republican ticket would you have that kind of favorability you know from the left it's funny I was in Alabama not that long ago I feel like that's probably would you have that kind of favorability from the left? It's funny, I was in Alabama not that long ago. I have a life that's probably a little bit like your life.

But this clearly conservative guy comes up to me and was like, Mr. Yang, I don't agree with you on a whole hell of a lot, but you got a set of balls on you, sir, and I just wanna shake your hand. And I was like, oh. So there's a conservative camp. That's just like you know I'm fine with Yang

He seems like a sensible business guy, and there was a Fox viewing mom who said something I really stuck with me where someone just interviewed her on Fox said hey, which of the Dems would you vote for? She's like Yang because he's the only one who doesn't seem like he's judging me And that that's like a lot of what's going on in America right now. Elitism. Where they feel like the Democratic Party is the judgey party. Sure, sure. And like no one wants to be judged.

The Democrats are like my mom. You know what I mean? That must be good. Yeah. That's interesting. I feel that. I'm from Louisiana and all my relatives are pretty red and they feel the same way They're like these fucking people on Capitol Hill and Hollywood and boopity boop and you're like, yeah

It's not all of them But that's what they think and they feel judged and the problem is that you just have like Two sides of this coin and so for each of them and just be like, oh, what about those people? What about those people? It's like whatever they are, I'm on the opposite side. Exactly. And so you wind up in these two camps and then the problems get unaddressed. Because of cable news though,

don't you think that's the big part is like the networks, like Fox gets such crazy viewership, whatever you get your news, it's now an algorithm geared to how you already think. So how are you gonna get out of that mindset? Right. Yeah, I write about this in Ford as well. So you have the polarization of cable news,

the nationalization of news, because you got rid of 2000 plus local papers. Local papers used to be straight up the middle. Like you guys remember growing up in Louisiana, you used to have some local paper. Non-opinion. Yeah, because it's hard to be ideological about high school sports and the bridge needing repairs.

That's what I wanna see though. Really, really opinionated high school sports. This guy stinks. Right? And then you get rid of that and then it gets replaced by your social media feed and cable news. Echo Chamber.

So the volume of getting divided into either camp. And then by the way these cable news channels, too like their business model is Not humming in some ways, too, so they're driven by their own economics to be like oh We just we got to be a little more sensationalist. Yes sure and Aggressive and anytime they do something that challenges their viewers they they fucking change the channel. Right. Like I'm not here to be challenged, I'm here to get that red meat I want or that blue meat I want.

So they're incentivized to stay extreme. Yes, and you have, so you have media putting us in the corners, you have social media putting us in the corners, and then the political incentives, and I don't want to get too nerdy on this shit, but- Nerd out, baby. But what is the approval rating of Congress right now? Not good. It's gotta be pretty low.

Lower than 20%? Yeah, it's like 15%, maybe 12% in one. What is the reelection rate for current members of Congress? Over 80%. Oh, is that right? 94%. Whoa! Numbers, baby!

This is good stuff! Yeah, it's a better win rate than the Jordan Air Chicago Bulls. Wow. So one of the jokes I think. But they're really the Washington Wizards, essentially. I don't know. And so the bullets. So I joke with people. It's like, hey, how many of you run a business?

What would your customers be like if you were to piss off 8 out of 10 of them and then change nothing? Great point. Great point. And that's the way most people feel about politics now. It's like, oh, these fucking jokers, blah, blah, blah. And it's because the system has been built up in a way that insulates them from us, and that's why people are so fucking angry.

And so you have the polarization of the electorate and then media and then social media is going to get worse, not better. By the way, I'm literally giving a TED Talk on this shit at TED in April, like the actual TED Talk. I thought you meant right now. I mean, it's Joe, he's like, welcome to my TED Talk. I'm actually going to TED and giving this talk. Great.

So keep an eye out. I'll be dressed differently and on a fancy stage. You'll get the mic, this mic, this one? I'll use whatever the mic they give me. I'm just gonna roll in and bang this thing. There you go, well, as a guy who does the road, I think we think of the left and the right as this long line. It's actually kind of horseshoe. Yeah, and they're kind of meeting the psychos are meeting in the middle and they don't even realize it. They're the same people. They're just different sides.

There's so many fucking Bernie Trump voters out there. That's what I'm saying. Like if Bernie had won in 16, like he beats Trump, you know, like Trump beats Hillary. You think, yeah, yeah. But if you had Bernie in there, he beats Trump. Like Trump beats Hillary. Yeah, yeah. But if you had Bernie in there, Bernie would have beaten Trump. Do you think Bernie, if he beat Biden, would have beaten Trump last time? This last time, I think in 20, it was Biden. And I was there.

I mean, I literally was next to Joe and Bernie during the debates and on the campaign trail. I think it was Biden's time in 2020. And you guys might not know this, whatever. I was campaigning for a guy named Dean Phillips who's running against Joe Biden in the Democratic nomination because I was like, look, a 55-year-old CEO of Talenty Gelato is a much better foil for Trump than Joe is this time.

It's funny, it's like energy coalesces around candidates in different cycles. I thought 16 was Bernie's time. But the fact that the DNC, frankly, in my opinion, I kind of shoved it to Hillary. I don't think it's just your opinion. I think that's how it opinion. I think that's yeah I still get text from Bernie too because I whoa he can text you know No, not you know the mailing list big print. Oh, okay, okay? I have a question with it like what you just said about running into that guy in Alabama

And he you know he meets you and and you tell this story I believe that happened you but how often are you watching TV? And they're doing a debate and they're like, a man came up to me in West Virginia and he had one leg and you're like, this didn't fucking happen. Like how much of that's made up? I hope not all of it.

For me, I didn't make shit up. And one of the things, I tell a story, I mean, I don't know that guy's name, I could probably like find out And I'm gonna be back in Birmingham Alabama this June For something slightly different how much do politicians make stuff up? I genuinely don't know like I didn't make shit up. There was enough real shit to go on so it wasn't necessary

But I do think that folks distort things and stretch the truth sometimes for like a good story And you know which by the way it's like on one hand again your human human being yeah Like you know if you say hey, I did some boring shit It's not a good story We've like hey I did some boring shit, and then there were bullets flying and I say baby and like rest of it then it's like well I know people People evolve, but you see a lot of politicians where they say a thing and then they cut to them

10 years ago and they're saying the exact opposite and you're like, well, now I don't know who to believe and they go, well, I've evolved. You're like, you just happen to evolve with the way the wind is blowing? Come on. I mean, how many people were against gay marriage? And then when gay marriage was like,

maybe we should let this happen. They're like, oh, you know, I've always loved gays, getting married, and I'm gay, and my dad's gay, and all that. And you're like, well, what about that whole thing? So then that's why we don't believe politicians a lot. Well, this is my mission in life, by the way, is that politicians respond to whatever incentives

are around them. That's what I'm saying. So during that period when it was not cool to be pro gay marriage It's like were some of them privately for gay marriage, of course But they there was like I would think most of them are like who gives a shit Yeah, why is this an issue like this is you know between two other people that have nothing to do with my life You know so one of the and this is something I do, I mean I've lived a version of it, I've written about it somewhat. So you have these political figures, and then they have all these incentives that are not great,

and then they have a team around them. And the team around them has the incentives taken up to 11, because they're all like, look, I have to get a job after you and so they'll be like here are the guardrails don't do this don't do that you do this gonna and what's interesting is that a lot of political figures they probably start out in a certain way being like you know I'm gonna do my own thing and then when they go off script, and then they get, you know, shivved by,

let's call it the press or whomever, then they'll be like, oh, that sucked. And their team's like, yeah, told you so. Don't do that again. And you know. These are experts in telling you where to step and where not to step. Guys, it was so wild, so check it out.

Random man run for president. No one gives a shit, whatever. Doing my thing. And then after Rogan, after we get this momentum behind us, then money starts coming in, and then this small army of consultants shows up. And then the team is a little bit like, like, okay, there are these consultants,

and part of you is like, well, fuck these consultants, who the hell are they? But then some of them you actually kind of need, because let's say you were me, you raised $40 million, you're trying to become president in this democratic race, you know what you've never done before? Buy ads in New Hampshire.

And so there's a consultant that's like, okay, we have the media relationships, here's what you buy, and then here's the ad firm and the consultant we recommend for this. And you're not gonna be like, fuck you, I'm going to figure out what TV networks, so obviously you have to be like, well I need some of what you have on the table.

Right, same with comedy. We gotta cut clips, we don't have to do any of that shit, had to edit video. Before we were here we were talking about business stuff. We're complete imbeciles. I have a question though. I mean, you talk about raising $40 million. How many people are running?

How much money do we waste on elections every year? Is there a party that's like, man if we just had less people, we could do something good with all this money? I don't know. Yeah, so to the extent that there's a group that wants that to happen, I'd say Ford, which I'm the co-chair of, is in that camp.

There are other organizations like Unite America represent us, which a bunch of Hollywood types are involved with that are trying to get money out of politics because the money is killing us Over ten billion dollars is gonna get spent in 24 beating each other up and you know who it's gonna benefit TV networks I spend all that that stuff and then I joke with people it's like how much it's gonna get spent bring us back together after It's like nothing. It's like what else could you do with 10 billion a whole lot by the way a lot of it, too It's like it's negating Anyway, yeah, there are some people who are literally just donating to both sides because it's like I'm covered no matter who wins

I mean like talk right talk about a waste so One of the diseases of this is that you're gonna need money to disrupt this system And so when I talk about the 40 million like you know Almost half a million Americans donated. I think I was on average was like 39 bucks to Give us a chance to compete you're welcome. Yeah, thank you for that mark. It was all mark. Yes One I want to see receipts mark Person be like hey, can you look up his name?

We want to do this on air. So, so you're, so you're trying to, and I will say too, one reason why I think some folks got behind the campaign is that for creatives like yourselves, like it's getting worse and worse, honestly, and AI's gonna make it much, much worse too. Oh, AI. And one of the reasons why I think some people got behind me was that there was like this Like it's getting worse and worse honestly and AI is gonna make it much much And one of the reasons why I think some people got behind me was that there was like this

Vision I had of this truck driving. Yeah of this of this more advanced economy Where people have just some level of resources natively and then a lot of it ends up going into arts creativity Culture philanthropy like blah blah blah and and the rest of it ends up going into arts, creativity, culture, philanthropy, like blah, blah, blah, and the rest of it. Because right now, you have this winner take all economy, it's getting harsher and more punitive and less human, and it's just squeezing people out more and more. And you guys have already, in my view, have already reached a point where you're gonna be fine and excellent.

Woo! We'll see. What a load off. You know what I mean? Like you guys are on your way. And I say this mainly because you guys are fucking talented. You guys are really good at what you do. Geez!

Really smart. Did not expect this to go this way, I'm uncomfortable. Yeah, same, I should have donated more. Ha ha ha ha ha. Genuinely, I'm a fan and you have a lot of other fans out there and you're gonna be great and gravy. But this is a harsher and harsher environment for creators in different ways.

And people coming up. I mean, we think, Mark and I got very fortunate and one of the reasons we did break the way we did and we bedded ourselves, we did YouTube and stuff, but the over saturation, how people break now, I think it's gonna be tougher for the next generation of comics, but they'll find a new way. Same, same, no, same, same. I mean, it is true. I think it was Bill Bur it's gonna be tougher for the next generation of comics, but they'll find a new way same No, no say I mean it is true. I think was bill burr actually said to Shane something it's true for you guys, too

He's like you're gonna be fine because you're funny. You know right it's probably true of just about anyone that like if they're genuine They'll find new ways to break funny there. They'll they'll get there, but you're also right that you wouldn't necessarily wish like you know this But you're also right that you wouldn't necessarily wish like, you know this Period on folks behind you I think about all the time like I mean I've had a crazy wild ride But and I imagine like a younger version of me trying to like do the same stuff. It's like I don't know if that shit You know because like times times gonna change I look at my kids I'm you know, I'm a parent. And sometimes people ask me, it's like, hey, do you want your kids to do the same thing that you do?

And I'm just like, ah. No way. No way. Like, I'm not sure. That would be wise. Be an architect. So you guys are on the other side of it. But like one of the things, and I'll actually

come back to you guys with this, is that I'm going to, I'm still grinding away and trying to humanize the economy in different ways. And I'm working on something that's good for creators So I'll come back to you guys when it's okay Well, you know, did you see that study where it said AI if you graduated didn't graduate high school It'll only affect you like 9% if you graduate high school It'll affect you 19 if you graduate from college. It'll affect you like

38 percent because that's the jobs it's gonna take those college level jobs you know we need plumbers we need and that's it's that's it's very hard to automate exactly you know like can you imagine trying to get a robot HVAC repair person impossible impossible but like a robot accountant like pretty doable easy easy and that was a one One of those Jewish robots. Yeah, they don't work Saturday. Do you guys wanna work on any bits and run them by Mr. Yang to punch it up? I don't know. I'll do one. Give me one.

Oh, you go one, I'll do one too. Okay, I had one, this happened a while, I don't know if I've ever done this in the past, happened a while back, but so this is a joke that happened. I ran into a friend, he saw me, you know that friend you hate running into, but he wanted to, you know what it is too, I'll tell you off air. It's not you.

But I run into this guy, he goes, I saw you on a date having an ice cream cone, like a little homo. And I was like, first of all, I was on a date with a woman. Second of all, how homophobic are you that you can't enjoy ice cream? And third, how gay would he think I was if he knew I was really eating sorbet?

So, but I wanna do a thing about like the idea that you can't, you're so homophobic you can't enjoy dessert. Yeah. Like no sweets, that's how close you are to being gay. Right, right. Like you're at a restaurant, they're like we have a lovely tiramisu this evening, and he's like nice try. Something like that, you know what I mean?

Yeah, and by his logic, Halloween is the pride parade. It's all candy. The whole holiday is based on candy. That's funny. It's all candy. The whole holly is based on candy. It's all sweets. There's something there. I'll try it. Sweets, is every kid gay? I mean, what are we doing here?

You give a woman a box of chocolates. Are they a lesbian? I guess it's because of the licking, the comb. It's the licking. Because a banana, he might do the same thing. So it might not be sweets. But it lasts longer if you lick it. Uh oh, that's the gayest thing I've it might not be sweets. But it lasts longer if you lick it.

Uh oh, that's the gayest thing I've ever heard. I don't know, have you got anything, Mark? Yeah, that's funny. Mine's a little darker, so buckle up there, Yangy. So I was thinking, my friend, she's very new age, hippie-dippie, holistic, and she's got two kids and all they eat is free range organic chicken. But all the kids do is play video games.

So I thought it was interesting that kids have become cooped up whereas they used to be free range and now chickens are free range where they used to be cooped up. We flipped chickens and kids. Yeah like cannibals, something about cannibals they're like fuck this kid, this kid never moved. That's where I was gonna go. are basically veal now kids are veal

Yeah, they were just shoving food and chemicals on the stroke. They don't move. They have no muscle mass, you know It's like it's like a yeah like veal but I went pedophile So I one of these elite pedophiles have a bit you like I want the free-range kids who've been running around and riding bikes I don't want shape back kid. Yeah, you know if I'm gonna do some diddling I would lose fuck a fat kid. I wouldn't say fuck a fat kid. I don't want that fat kid Yeah, he's pumped full of chemicals and cereal and junk food and no no muscle. I'm gonna run for president again you guys Thoughts, Yang? Andy? Anything?

How about those things? I think there's something there. Okay, maybe Cannibal is softer. Cannibal is kind of fun too, because yeah, but pedophiles more likely. Yeah, cannibals are pretty rare. They're rare. Although that might be the next thing

we all have to get behind. Hey, my cousin's a cannibal, I'm pro-cannibal, I'm cannibal tolerant. We have to apologize to Armie Hammer. He'll be back. What happened with that guy? He's out. He's out.

He's done. He's done. Check out the book, Ford by Andrew Yang. I'm gonna read it, I'm looking forward to this. This is a, looks like, got a lot of good names in you. You got Cuban, Mark Cuban, Van Jones, all right. Kara Swisher, look at that. Hey, Van Jones, he can get it

You like him. He's sexy those little glasses. Oh, yeah, hot hot black days good on there. I like that guy well Yeah, it's oh you're doing in the past Anything no Houston improv Irvine you're really doing comedy. Cobbs Comedy Club, Denver Comedy Works, look at you. I didn't know those dates were still up there, but they were a minute ago. We're one in the same. We could be doing the same gigs.

We are one in the same, guys. These politicians, they're taking our jobs. You have little to fear. I heard you're police junk. I heard Mike Huckabee tried stand up. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, that's funny.

My friend, do you know Baratunde? Yeah. Oh, that's funny. My friend my friend Do you know baritone day? Yeah used to run my show back there to the first and great guy He told me Huckabee very likable on stage and they don't have a lot in common I could see that but the bits weren't great. He said but you know, I wonder if Trump if he loses He could just pivot in a stand-up into arenas. Oh, easy. Trump and friends? Oh my God. Bring out a couple of... That's pretty much what he's doing now, guys. He kinda is.

I guess that's true, and he's got merch. He's already got merch. He's got it all. Just make up killing. Trump is basically Bert. Yeah. He's basically Bert Kreischer. Playing big venues, he's selling a ton of merch.

Yeah, good point. Fully bloated tour. Yeah. All right, is this me? Yeah, he's selling a ton of merch. Yeah, good point. Fully bloated tour. Yeah. Alright, is this me? Yeah, it's Martin. Alright, hey, I'm in Buffalo, New York, Syracuse, Minneapolis, Madison, Wisconsin, Bloomington, Evansville, LA, Coachella, Victoria, BC, Vancouver, Royal Oak, Michigan, all the swing states, Fort Wayne, West Palm, Boston, Pittsburgh, Seattle, Spokane, Philly,

marknormandcomic.com, check us out on Punch Up, get the book. BodegaCatWhiskey.com, I got nothing on the schedule right now, I just burned an hour with the special out July 9th on a major streamer, I wasn't supposed to say where it is, but you guys, if you listen, you know where it's gonna be. Did we bleep that? No, it's already out, It was in the Shane episode.

Great. But I will be in Atlantic City in June, June 22nd with Chris DiStefano. That's gonna be a fun one. Hell yeah. We're competing against Frankie Valli, so come see us. I know, I'd rather see Frankie Valli. He's good.

He's good. I already lost it. So you go see the Sambo. Oh, and that's, and he keeps putting this picture up because he wants us to show it. Matt Salak, you took this picture of Andrew Yang You got everybody you got Yang Rihanna Robert smigel on last week, and he just pulls up a picture and smile goes oh, I know that he goes I took it

He's taking he's taking everybody. Oh, yeah, it's around. Yeah, I'm back. Yeah Yeah, get around got everybody everybody, but yes see us on the road by bodega cat bodega cat whiskey calm We're basically sold out of our first batch which is insane We love you guys, and we are we might be legal at this point in New York I guess maybe rain again this in if not now soon very soon, but yeah by Andrews book Is it on audible too? Yeah? Yeah, I spent a number of hours dictating that thing so Wow, thanks check it out. You know go to 1.5x, 2x, whatever. Oh, there you go.

Well, and run for mayor again, man. Yeah, would you please? Run for something. Thanks, guys. If I do, you guys are gonna have to come campaign. We'll open. We'll do stick for you. We'll do a fundraiser.

I'll do the free range pedophile bit out of the gate. Oh my god. All right. I'll do the sucking cock ice cream chunk. Yeah, we'll have you We love you guys, thanks for listen, thank you Andrew Yang comedy to be here. Thanks guys You know the future's close I've had a little too much burping And Norman's talking shit about the fucking pub And I get down in the same way I'm on the roof like a cop's coming

And naked Samuel is feeling dangerous I'm out to lunch here in New Orleans This woman doesn't look like I remember her And I get down in the same way We might be true