We Might Be Drunk - Ep 190: Ian Lara & Boulevardier

Episode Date: July 29, 2024

We're back again with Boulevardiers and Ian Lara, Episode 190 is a great one with road stories Salacuse shares his story of getting attacked on the street and more. Find the guys on the road: Sam Morril: https://www.sammorril.com/ Mark Normand: https://marknormandcomedy.com/ Ian Lara: https://www.ianlaralive.com/ Shop: https://www.wemightbedrunkpod.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/wemightbedrunkpod Bodega Cat: http://www.bodegacatspirits.com We Might Be Drunk is produced, recorded and edited by Gotham Production Studios. Head producer: Matthew Peters https://www.gothamproductionstudios.com/ https://www.instagram.com/mrmatthewpeters/ If you want to start a podcast contact [e-mail] for a discount on services when referred by WMBD! Support the show and get 20% off and free shipping with the code DRUNK at https://www.manscaped.com

Yo! Yo-ho! We're here folks! We got a bartender mobile on demand. What do you got for us today, Fatty? I mean, we were talking day drink feels like a boulevardier. I like I've been having at night. What do you think? Sounds good to me. Ocampari makes it feel like more of a day drink. Yes, it's a little lighter. We got the nice giant cube balls there. Cube ball doesn't make sense. It's an ice orb sphere. I don't fucking know. Anal bead, who knows?

They all come out the same color. Great tell bit. An old David Tell bit, yeah. His best one about the anal beads, that's how you know he's a great comic. He's got a genre of anal beads jokes. The whole section. My favorite thing to yell when I take them out is the winning powerball numbers are

The king the king sale I won't see another special from him for 15 years We're lucky, but yeah, all right. What do you got one part Campari one car come? Cat and yeah, I want part brodega cat. It's like a Negroni but with whiskey instead of the uh, gin, you know? Uh-huh. Okay. Wait, a Negroni's gin? Are you serious? Oh. You know how many Negronis we've drank together? I didn't know it was gin. What do you think we're drinking? Oh, I feel like I hooked up with a man. It's been a long time. I've been duped. That's gin? I thought it's gin. What do you think we're drinking? Ah, I feel like I hooked up with a man. It's the whole time, I've been duped. That's gin, I thought it was whiskey. I can't tell if you're fucking with me.

Negroni? Yes, Negroni please, you didn't know that? I had no idea, damn. I can't believe you didn't know that shit. Man, what do they call a fake Negroni? Like a mocktail, nephoni. Really? Oh yeah. Damn.

I might have made that up. That's not a thing. Foni Negroni, that's what it is. That sounds like what you call a wigger. From the peanut gal we had Wigroni over there. What? Wigroni, we had that from Peter's over there. Oh, okay.

Yeah. Now, I assume you're a phony Negroni Phony phony Groney all right any What's new man, I mean we hung out yesterday. Oh, yeah, that was fun. What was yesterday? We did are you garbage? Oh, that's right. Yeah, always a fun that that you got to go to that studio Peters. You're gonna shit blood It's just they got a waiting room with couches. I think we got a good studio. We got a great studio, but they own a floor, basically. Yeah, well, they're paying way more than we are, but.

That's true, but we get sandwiches. I just ate a sandwich. It was damn fucking good. Now you're talking. All right, yeah, that's too hot out there. The heat in this town is killing me. It's brutal, and my AC is like, the guy came by and he's like, it's working. I'm like, no, it's cold, but it's just, that's too hot out there. They heat in this town. It's brutal And my AC is like the guy came by and he's like it's working. I'm like no it's cold, but it's just there's no pressure He's like oh, yeah, yeah, well you need the fucking pressure need the pressure. I got the fans going oh yeah

I know I'm in my own home sweating my tits off. I've taken two showers today It's a nightmare feel like Sydney party in the heat of the night. I'm like what is this Mississippi? This is brutal We're doing too many black references out of the gate This is this is offensive. What's it? What's the other one guess who's coming to dinner? Yeah, that's that's like the woke pandering one Uh-huh, it was like the Hollywood pat themselves on the back one right in the heat of the night's way cooler. Okay same year Wow He did two he was both were nominated for Best Picture Picture Well, he won the Oscar and coming to dinner. I think I did he might have yeah, he won for one Oh, yeah, it makes sense. Yeah, also Bonnie and Clyde the graduate

And I think dr. Doolittle that year because there's a great book on it called pictures at a revolution Wow what a year crazy year Dr. Doolittle supposed to be a piece of trash well guess who's coming to the pod today our buddy There we go. Come on. We're making drinks here. Speaking of the Groneys. Great to see you.

Hey. What's up guys? Happy to be back. Good to have you back. Oh you got Ian finance? Ian no finance. We had another guest but he apparently bailed so. He bailed?

We wanted to do a two-parter, we ought to do a two-person show but All right, it's gonna be great with this even better. You just took my shine. Yes This is great Sam. I've been seeing this all over congrats. You see people are talking about it. He's worried cuz it's not on the home Oh, no, I think this is I think this is better Yeah, I mean like it's all like it's all over the things. Cheers, by the way. Hey. A little boulevardier.

There we go. Cheers, man. Let's drink to Sam's special. To the special. Hey, you've changed. I was literally- On video, not on the home page. We'll get it there.

Give it a search. I was getting a haircut and I was planning to go home and watch it and then you hit me up. I was like, oh yeah, I'll come through. Hey! Yeah, I'm a fan. I still watch the things. Really? He watches comedy.

Yeah, Joe List always makes fun of me because I like watch comedy. I'm the same way. I'll check in. Yeah, you too. Yeah. See the new Gaffigan, see the new Percazzi. I watch a little, but I'm scared it's gonna come into my head, one of the premises. It does happen.

Yeah, that does happen. I know, it worries me. But the flip side of that is what what if you're doing a bit, and he's got it from two years ago, and you worked your tail on it, and then you didn't realize he had it the whole time. That's gonna happen regardless. Yeah.

I guess so. Because Jimmy Carr said that happened with you, where he did a bit that you did. That's right. And he called me and said, how do you feel about it? And I go, you can put it out, but mine's already out, so you're gonna get shit. And he was like, I'll deal with it. And he put it go you can put it out, but mine's already out So you're gonna get shit and he was like I'll deal with it and he put it out. He put it out Yeah, I mean I've seen their stuff where I've seen like rock and Louie have like a similar thing

And I'm like they're close friends that watch these hours black people. Yeah He did say the n-word quite a bit yeah, yes, there was a time I remember when I started comedy where every white comic needed an n-word bit cuz it really that was like the time that me But I think the difference like you said I think sometimes with the urban comics like they'll know they won't watch comedy at all Yeah, and then like they'll literally be doing bits and I'm like, oh that's on this. Yes Yes, but it did not special sometimes. Yes, yes. But they're not seeing it, but they're like, I didn't see it.

I'm like, yeah, but it's out there. And they tend to not give a shit. You're like, I think Jeff Ross has that bit. And they're like, I have that bit too. Then they'll go, he stole it from me. I'm like, he did it in 91. They're like, ah, fuck him. Yeah, I remember one time when I was starting off,

I told a comic that, a famous comic had his joke in the special and like he was Like an open mic and he was like, yeah, he stole it Like yeah, I did it at like Caroline He must have saw me this is like a man it was deal you believe like a huge comic right? Yeah, he stole it from me. He's peeking he's peeking behind the curtain Bill Maher's monologue he did a bit I used to do and you're like he didn't see behind the curtain Yeah, it was all that bill maher's monologue. He did a bit I used to do and you're like he didn't see but the monologue is different cuz they have a whole writing status

Yeah, they could have seen you do yeah true Yeah, the monologue is SNL get shit for that where they're just like cuz you know the way we're worried I mean they have that pressure cooker where it's like fuck. I got five days to right right So maybe they'll panic and like oh fuck This is it cuz I remember I thought of a bit once, and it turned out to be an SNL sketch. It was the other way around. I remember that bit.

But I, and I was like, it felt like a very me bit. Great bit. The angle was like... Halloween? Halloween, yeah, like that's the best day for a registered sex offender to knock on your door and be like, I'm new to the neighborhood, I'm a registered sex offender,

because you could pretend it's like a costume. Yes. And they did, and they did that as a sketch, and I was like, oh fuck new to the neighborhood, I'm a registered sex offender, because you could pretend it's like a costume. And they did that as a sketch, and I was like, oh fuck, I immediately dropped it. But it happens both ways. You ever had a bit where you were like, but I really came up with this? Yes, yes, of course. I know they have some similar, but I came up with this.

I really wrote this, I've never seen him do it. That's why it's so hard to drop it, because you're like, no, this has come out of my head. Here, yeah, that sucks. I feel like a lot of comics are like, I'll just write him do it. That's why it's so hard to drop it. Because you're like, no, this has come out of my head. Here, yeah. That sucks. I feel like a lot of comics are like, I'll just write a new bit. I'm like, yeah, but it's not. It's not easy.

It's not easy. That's like saying, I'll just have another kid. You're like, yeah, but I'm losing a kid. I heard Louis say that once. Just write another bit. That's a good point. I heard Louis say that on ONA once where he was talking about how Dennis Leary just took his I'm an Asshole.

Yes. Like, I'm an Asshole. That song was a Louis bit. Yeah. And he's like, yeah, he took it from just took his I'm an Asshole. Yes. Like I'm an Asshole, that song was like a Louie bit. Yeah. And he's like, yeah, he took it from me, but I was like, whatever, yeah, he said that, I'll just, I'll write a new bit. And I was like, man, Louie was on fire at that point.

I know. Yeah, that attitude to just be like, yeah, I'll write a new fucking. Well, writing a new bit doesn't just mean writing, you gotta come up with a premise. Sure. Out of the air, so it's not that easy. And a bit is like, you know, there's a thing of like,

I wrote it, I enjoy doing it, I'm not tired of it yet. Like, once I'm tired of it, yeah, I'll write a new one. But if you're not tired of it yet, you're ever being an actor and you're like, I just wanna do this bit, like wait till I, and then you have to drop that one. I know. I always wonder, cause I'm not gonna name any names,

but I'll go to the seller and I'll see four comics in a row do Trump. Oh yeah. And I'm like, oh man, that would suck because we don't, I don't really do impressions but imagine the guy before you did an impression you're about to do and the guy before him did one. Yeah, it's probably gonna get worse too, right? Yeah. He's gotta not book four impressionists back to back.

That's not fair too. I guess you're right but Trump is so popular on tape. Just you look at the line to be like airy Spears You're on a subway and like homeless guy walks through asking everybody for money And then he closes the door and then the door opens on the other side another guy comes Yes Same thing I used to have a bit about that about how it like the last one like the first one came in and was Doing like a song and dance and this guy just asked for money. I'm like oh you got to step up your game

Yeah, yeah Do a Trump impression or something. Yeah. Yeah and the thing is that the seller like because it is the seller like a lot of them are like pretty good. Yeah yeah they're great. It's not like one is so much better than the other they're all like oh yeah this is pretty good. Yeah and it's still better than the crowd work guys who go up after each other and they ask the same questions. Oh I'm so embarrassed Comics do that they're watching them like did he talk to this table look I talked to all of them like fuck Yeah, I was gonna ask them if that was his daughter his wife. Oh

I feel like before you go up for someone's like oh, is there a girl with big boobs up there? You want to talk about her? I don't happen. I don't care. Yeah, it happens to me. I'm like I don't they meant after the show Yeah, I'm always like I don't care. Yeah, they're like, oh, yeah the couple in the front they just met He's from Australia By the way, we're just talking about will right? You can really do some jokes There's a time I was like I was I've been at this other way I'm like it would be kind of nice to they just ban crowd work. Oh

I don't like to do it I don't like to do it in the city like sometimes it happens like naturally sure follow the seller But like I don't like the guy after me having to follow it. You know it's like because I'm on the road I'm headline. I'm like it's my show. I'm doing an hour 10 or so. So I'm like I'll just fucking have some fun. On the road of course. But yeah in 15 minutes I'm like oh I'm here to work on shit. Yeah of course. I was at the cellar once with Jimmy, with Fallon.

He was watching, he just wanted to watch comedy. Like he just was like I wanna get back until I wanna watch comedy. And we were all sitting in the back at the VU and we watched like the first three comics and they all did crowd work all did crowd like the host and he was like, what is this? And Michael was like, this is like kind of comedy now. Yes That'd be so funny if that just influences monologue the next day. Yeah, look at this bitch in the He's like, I kind of wanted to see bits and stuff. Yeah, I get it. Yeah, he's old school

I mean, he's like, I mean he came out an arrow I mean crowd work when I started at least was like almost like unique to New York I guess some LA guys but like you host on the road would never do crowd work They would do their ten minutes right they do their ten minutes of material trying to build an act. Yeah, I Guess you know the hosts were veterans in New York and the hosts on the road right were newer newer Yeah, it was weird back then I remember being on the road were newer. It was weirder back then. I remember being on the road and you'd be in the green room and you heard the host go into the crowd.

You're like, what's going on? And you would put your ear to the door, like, is everything all right? Cause it was like a strange moment to do crowd work. Now it's go to. Yeah, I feel like people who have a weird freedom to it where I'm like, this isn't even good. Like, how are you this free?

Like, cause crowd work, there is a thing of like, you don't know where it's gonna end, right? There's no punch line. So I'm like, how are you this open to cuz crowd work there is a thing of like you don't know where it's gonna end right? There's no punch. I'm like how are you this open to finding something and find nothing consistently? Yes, and then they'll keep asking waiting for something. Yeah, what do you do? Oh, you don't work in a circus. All right accounting Okay, what do you do? Oh, you're with your wife. God damn it. They're just waiting for some crazy answer I'm like, this is not what it is. Yeah. Yeah, it's tough man. And you want to build the act there. I mean It's not what it is. Yeah, it's tough, man. And you wanna build the act there.

I mean, yeah, I'm at a loss for it. They say the bubble is bursting, but it the fuck does. Yeah, that's what I feel. I made it a point to put not any crowd work in this special. There's one moment I couldn't delete just because a woman booed me. That was a great moment.

I had to keep that in because I thought it was such a perfect fucking moment. But I went to the crowd just to fuck around because I did four shows, I'll get some extras. Behind the scenes shit for Punch Up or something like that. You should be following us all on PunchUp.live by the way. Are you on there? No, no.

Get on there, good for moving. Is it a new thing? Because I said I wanted to be like first on the next new thing. It is, yeah. It's PunchUp.live slash Mark Norma to PunchUp.live slash Samorail. Get on it.

Our name slash sign up if you want to make it easy, but dude it's a... See, you would build a mailing list, you put exclusive content on there. You know, Instagram, certain stuff is like too offensive, they'll bury it. Yeah, yeah. You can put whatever you want on here. It's like nice that it's like a kind of a free speech thing that's not run by wackos. Okay. So, and it's just good to build up a base and you just can blast them whenever you not too much

You know, I'm like, yeah, you're spam them But like when you got a special out or you come into their city, it's can do the geo located thing So that's pretty cool. It's worth it and the mailing list is yours He doesn't keep it if you want to take it with you when you leave. Oh really take it with you. Oh, that's great That's great mailing list is good. It's back cuz it's back, baby I think it was the thing before yeah, it helps you know where the people are who your friends are exactly where they live You know what they're watching what they're not watching. Yeah, you get all the analytics I just met felt like I

Anyone can do if you're a funny comic you should be able to be good at crowd work I think if you're a funny person, so I think the hour think the hour, if you can just put out joke, joke, joke, like that's I think the thing now. Well how many, oh sorry. No, no, no, go ahead. How many crowd work moments are, you know, you remember the Chris Rock, Black Wheel vs. N-Words, you remember the Louis CK bank joke or whatever.

How many people are quoting when you ask that guy where you got his shirt? Yeah, I mean, you look at somebody like, like right now when I watch this crap, I'm like, this is like pretty good. Like it's well-produced, like it's, I'm like, I don't really see crowds. You got the Ted Talk.

Yeah, yeah, I'm like, it's like a perfect interaction. He needs both hands. They got a wild story, it just called, I'm like, you don't generally see it like that. No, no. Stuff like that. Yeah, he's kicked it up a notch. Yeah, he's, but yeah, it just called, I'm like, you don't generally see it like that. No, no. Stuff like that. Yeah, he's kicked it up a notch. Yeah, he's the, but yeah, like you said,

it's usually the bits. I've never had like a crowd word clip go viral. All of my clips ever went viral was bits. Really? Yeah, I've had crowd word go viral. I've had a couple crazy moments, so it's like, I just always had people there, so every once in a while, the moment's so crazy, and if you have the right comebacks and lines.

Right, yeah, yeah. It's gotta be a crazy moment though. It's gotta be crazy. Speaking of- Oh baby! Audience attacks. We got three New Yorkers here. Yeah, we gotta play this clip. Speaking of crazy punch lines,

I was randomly punched as one of those people just gets punched on the street. Yeah, yeah. Some guy just on my block turned the corner. Yeah, okay. You don't have to sit. That's fine. Let's cut that out.

Let's bleep. Okay, he turned the corner and as soon as I, he turned the corner, I'm walking right into him, towards him, he took like a plastic bag, like a, I don't know, from a convenience store, did like a whip around movement and threw it right in my face. And that's something really heavy in it. Damn.

Yeah, I would say like a can of soup at least. Whoa! Wow! Because I had a cut, I don't know if it's gone, but I went like this because it came right to my face. Oh man, that's powerful. I put up the defensive posture. And as soon as I pulled my hand.

You were able to block it. Yeah, yeah, I was as close as I am to Ian Or even closer Wow And as soon as I come down from my defensive stance overhand right right What's the guy is he a big dude or what he was fit I say he's about mark side maybe a little taller Is like like you acidic Jew? Well, I showed the pic- I've actually

the video here if you want to see it. We got the video! So how'd you got the video? I went to my building, it's in my block. And I was like, hey I was just attacked, I want to put up a picture on the building so that we know who to look out for. They were like, can't help you. You guys were like, yeah right, you want to play it on We Might.

So the building said, can't help you without a warrant Yeah, so you got a warrant no, so I went to the next building Uh-huh, and I I appealed to their superintendent He was like I live in this neighborhood with my kids you can have whatever you want. Just find the guy Yeah, let's see this scary dude dude but you got him back oh yeah so that's areas oh wow yeah that's him I was hoping he wasn't this is the alley hey he could have been any you could have been any race yeah I would have preferred if he wasn't this right I showed it to my neighbor and he's a

man that's the bag right to the face there is a real battle and here's the bag right to the face. There he is. Wow, this guy's angry. Is that a real battle? And here's the reverse angle. So I'm in this little area where you can't see me. Okay. Two cameras are there. So you're going to see the bag fly here. The bag deflecting off my face or my arms. And then there goes the bag. Oh my God. And then he delivered a punch right there.

And I take out a little pepper spray. For you to walk him down. And I give him a little shot. And then he's coming back. That wasn't enough. I got him again really good there. Nice. That's crazy.

Was he hurting there? Well, all he did was he turned to me and he was like, I was expecting tears and- Yes, like the movies. Like the movies? He was like, all he did, he was like, you got me. He just pointed at me and said, you got me. This is like Ronnie, like Ronnie Chang ends the special on a bit like this that this happens to him

Yeah, like some guy just I think it was a girl. I was Simonage is gonna do it Like he just attacks him and then just walks off in this way and I was like that doesn't sound believable but it happens Yeah, happens. Wow easy Did you and you went after him look at you? I know he's walking him down No, I got him that two times it was he in pain from the pepper spray you got me That's all he said I thought this shit's supposed to hurt. I know yeah, I know I gave that to my wife Well the cops came after the cops came to your wife Either way she sprayed me with it

And I told the cops I was like I was expecting tears. He was like, usually this affects people. He was going on adrenaline, it's probably affecting the block away. Yeah. Yeah. Isn't pepper spray illegal? Was that legal to her? Well, I'm glad you said that.

So I told the cops, I was like, well, I pepper sprayed him. And they're like, do you wanna go find him? I was like, yeah, I wanna find him. And they're like, no, no, no, do you wanna do a drive along and we'll help you find him? I thought they meant like, you want to get him and So I was like yeah, and he but what does that what does that mean? Just fine just be like that's the guy and that's it and then they would arrest him. Oh really yeah

Okay, so then the guy the cop pulled me aside, and he was like I have to tell you that he could press charges on you Yeah, cuz you hit him with pepper spray. It's a salt oh on you. Yeah, because you hit him with pepper spray. It's a salt. Oh, where's the white privilege? What's what he did? That's also salt. So we both press charges on each other, probably both dropped them. And I was like, I don't want my fate in the hands of a crazy man. Also, hitting a guy in the face is just a misdemeanor, right? If it's not a weapon, it's not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. So it's not like they're going to keep you. No, he'd get out an hour. This your first time attacked? You've been you're a New're in New York I mean since high school, but I've been mugged in high school But not as an adult who the fuck's gonna attack this guy in a Hawaiian shirt

What kind of monster do you have to don't look like an undercover cop my shirts a surprego for? It's a punchable mug What a prick I know what drugs you think he was on I think he was just crazy mmm I think he was just crazy cuz I got to see the video of him walking on another block with their cameras and he's talking Himself throwing his hands up in the air doing this or oh Good I didn't see except fucking headphones. That's like the drugs you see now in the street though That's not like when I was growing up the drugs now that people were like angry to themselves like oh fuck

Yeah, that's gotta be drugs. I see so many people like that walking through the street Yeah, that was actually gonna be. I see so many people like that walking through the street these days. That was actually gonna be one of my peeves. Like when you text me, I was literally experiencing a peeve. When you text me, I was like, I got it immediately because I was on the train. This is the second time it happened to me. I've been on the train and a person sits next to me

and starts literally shooting hell. Whoa. Like middle of the day. Like I've only seen it twice my whole life and it's both happened like on the train like studio I mean Wow Yeah, I've seen it all over. Yeah, but the train is so intimate So yeah, like next to me like as well as you are that's crazy as close as you are and you know

Addiction whatever but it's crazy. I'm like, you know, don't do that. Can we go back to jerking it? Yeah Come on the other needle. Come on. I don't want to be controversial, but don't do heroin next to me on the train. That is fucking crazy. Insane, insane. But if you got to do heroin, I would do it in the air conditioned train. That is true. And I'm also one of these New Yorkers.

Like you always hear people talk about New York and they're like, it's so dangerous. And I'm like, I'm out every night. Nothing happens. But then you see that and they're like it's so dangerous And I'm like I'm out every night nothing happens But then you see that and you're like well, this is like a problem. Yeah Almost like these heroin addicts aren't thinking about other people That's true, but we have like nostalgia for old New York, right you up here Yeah, like we were like, oh we love the 80s and 90s and the stuff we saw in the 70s in the movies But it's like do you really want it now? No, you know what 80s and 90s and the stuff we saw in the 70s in the movies. But it's like, do you really want it? Now it's back. You know what I was thinking though?

And this might sound ignorant. Oh, I can't wait. Well, but you know, all these movies we love took place in New York. Yeah. It was grimy. Yeah. Taxi driver, fucking mean streets, all those like, you know, taking a Pelham one, two, three,

like all those classic movies. French Connection. It's a good one. Great one. All those movies took place and you're like, maybe we're gonna get some good art out of this, you know Oh, yeah comedy's the best it's been ever. Look at this special. Yeah comedy's popping. Yeah. Well, yeah, it's interesting to me page That damn amazon homepage good luck Because I feel like people talk like if you you let some people talk especially when they get political It's always like it st things are so bad right now. And I'm like, they're not that bad.

Like it was worse. It was a lot worse. But I get, you know. It feels worse because of social media. Because of social media, right? Yeah. Totally. Because people are more like, I think you used to keep your politics to yourself.

Yeah. And now like people, like there's like the he slash him people, and then there's like mega 2024, him people and then there's like mega 2024 you know like it's like it's like they leave with that Yeah, yes, and and you go to some of these small towns like I remember playing like Appleton, Wisconsin And they were good crowds, but they I feel like they were shocked at the shit I was saying because they were like oh, we just keep this to ourselves

You know they're like wholesome. Yeah, it's like a wholesome. Yeah. Yeah, I like those at a place in time Yeah, yeah I was I won't say the city I was in but I was on the road and I It's like a wholesome. Yeah, yeah. It's like a wholesome. Yeah, yeah, I like those. At a place and time. Yeah, yeah. I won't say the city I was in, but I was on the road and I had the waitress, the greenroom waitress, the sweetest, like the sweetest, most kindest person the whole weekend. And on the last day of the weekend, like the manager comes in and he's like, for some reason he just drops like, oh, you haven't heard her political views yet.

And then like she walks in, like when he's saying that and just starts spewing like Q-anon really the craziest stuff and i'm like, oh wow another guest. She's like the sweetest kindest You know the president is an alien It is funny because you never know who it's gonna be I know and it's usually sweet But my buddy's mom is q-anuing on and she comes in with cookies. She's got the apron on. She's the nicest lady on the planet. They bring in brownies like here you go in the Jews called Christ.

Yeah. I'm sure there was nice Nazis, you know, there's one guy brought in doughnuts, you know. He was nice to the other Nazis. He holds the door, he's a gentleman. He asks about the other person. Make sure to the other Nazis. He holds the door, he's a gentleman. He asks about the other person. Make sure to ask polite questions. He's like, look, we gotta annihilate the Jews. It doesn't mean we can't be civil.

Yes, polite. I worked with a comic once with his, he's actually getting a divorce. He was telling me, because his wife had gone, QAnon. And he was like a right-wing guy, but he was like, she was too, too much guy, but he was like she was too. Yeah Yes, he was too far and it just couldn't work anymore He's like she'd come home. He'd come home and she's like on YouTube like you gotta watch this

Crazy what you go back around like it's like a globe But it's important you meet like the far right and the far left just meet they just need horseshoe. Yeah, they're both Yeah, they just both go like like crazy. Yeah, they're both extremists and they end up They're like, oh you hate Joe Biden. So do I and now we're now we're in in on that. Yeah, it's pretty crazy It's pretty crazy. It's funny though when you step back How do we get here the QAnon people as psycho as they are they're fucking entertaining. Oh, they're great I could just like just go like Flat earthers. That's fucking fascinating. You really think the Earth is flat?

Tell me everything. Not only do they think the Earth is flat, they think you're a complete asshole for not thinking it's flat. Right, right. It's one thing to have your opinion about one thing, but to think that the rest of the world is just complete idiots. I know.

They call us roundies or something. There's like a slur for us. Well, do you see that clip, those clips of Terrence Howard? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. And he spoke with such confidence. Such confidence. I was like, man, this guy must be fucking on to something.

And then you listen to what he's saying, I'm like, either I'm fucking retarded, or this guy's retarded and just really confident. Yeah, he's charming. When the first episode came out, a couple of my boys kinda sent it to me, and they were kinda sending to me like, yeah, like I knew it. Cause I guess it's cool to think that everyone else,

that you're not the dumb one, that everyone else is dumb and you've been right all along. And that kinda confirms it. Like all this other stuff's been wrong, I'm right. And I'm like, I don't know much about this. Like I really don't know what he's talking about, but I'm not gonna side on an actor's thing when there's like scientists who dedicate

their entire life to this. And I'm an asshole for like believing scientists. Like even though if they may be lying I still I'm gonna side with them. Yeah, over Terrence Howard. Yeah, over that. Yeah, with disrespect. Fine actor. Very good. Right. Great actor. Hustle him. And he's a great guy like in the interview. He's like a charming guy. Yeah, he's a cool dude. He's like a nice dude. I know. They're charmers, man. Yeah, did you watch the the follow-up episode? No? No, I was pretty did too. I heard the guy I heard he got destroyed pretty good I destroyed pretty good because they brought a real doctor on yeah scientists. He was good. He was so nice though He was like really nice about it and polite It wasn't like a thing where they were like yelling back and forth if you end up Billy Madison with the guys like we're we're All dumber for having yeah, yeah

Yeah caught on the Terrence Howard like they had to have him back on immediately because it was a huge thing. That's the rise of podcasts. It is. Someone's just charming. They can go for three hours and you're like, okay, now I want to hear what he says next. Now all of a sudden you're like, fuck, now I'm one of them, you know? Yeah, well, Cat Williams on Shayshay.

I mean, it changed the game. It was so captivating. He was awesome, though. Phew, they got 70 million views. I mean, he was like, I read 4,000 books by the time I was seven. I'm like, that's not possible. But I'm still hanging on his every word. Of course, of course.

He's got 13 kids. I Googled he had 10. And I was like, what am I doing? Why you add the three? Now, do you think, like, you guys have a popular podcast. Do you think if you bring somebody on, is it your job to be like, hey, this isn't sound true?

Or you just. No go let them go yeah I mean if yeah, I don't think we have like the most provocative guests either Yeah, if we know you were like you know if we had anyone that said shit where we're like yeah I'm so Alex Jones is coming at four. I think the New Yorker in me though cuz New York is so like well That's bullshit like I just can't not say it well I'm like yeah, I don't believe that Yeah, Al Franken said he was a comedian. We're like just don't say But you know love Terrence Howard that guy would knock you out Speaking the gospel

Yeah, man, it's crazy You can't even walk down the street without getting hit with a can of soup and punched in the face. That sucks that it's on your block, too. Yeah, on my block. That's like in your hood. Like, you gotta get your hood back.

Yeah. You gotta see him again. Yeah, and beat his ass. You should become like a Clint Eastwood Gran Turino type. Yeah. Just like muttering slurs. Hold a befriended young Filipino. So I got a question.

Am I justified to either punch him in the face on sight No, that's a hate crime. Can I do anything to him at all? Oh, I'm going to protest I'll take to the streets. I'll tell you what's even more racist if you pepper spray the wrong black guy You got to go gay Because then it would make it a hate crime. You have no gay cop show up. Officers, thank God. But how's it gonna look? Like, people don't know the backstory.

Right. You're just a guy in a Hawaiian shirt beating a black guy. Look at this, when I'm walking this guy down. No one's gonna believe Matt's gay. He's not fit enough. Look at the family here. Look at the family cross over.

I'm the crazy one. Yeah. Ah. So I'm like, you want more, bitch? You want more? Yeah, yeah. The family's like, what's this crazy white guy doing? What is your what is your wife say when you come home? Uh she said let's go get him whoa?

You hand your son a gun She she handed me the baseball bat. She's like whoa Baseball bat are you confident enough with a baseball bat? Yeah, I know you played but like are you confident enough to have a technique? I've been working on it. Well. She's just happy. She's not the one getting hit that I know it played but like are you confident enough to... I have a technique I've been working on it. Well she's just happy she's not the one getting hit that much. Oh! I know what goes on in that hole. Look at that walk! I mean you're going full gorilla there.

Yeah, I am gorilla, yeah. You bring out a baseball bat, like if you swing and miss you're in a problem. That's what I mean, I wouldn't trust myself with a baseball bat. Well, my technique is one of two things. Knees, go for the knees, because you're going gonna hit one of the two because you can't back away Both knees or straight judo chop right over the top like behind me kill him You have a murder. I do what I did. How funny would that be if Salak use went down for murder? Yeah, you'll be a murderer

That's not even self-defense Another Joan Rivers died that might have been, was that Hicks? That was Joan. That was Joan? Yeah. That was like a ghost in the room. Well we didn't want too many women up there. It worked out. If you're tired of having your dick stuck to your balls and your balls stuck to your leg or your legs stuck to your dick, it's time to try Sheath Underwear. It's incredible. They make underwear with two pouches, put your dick in one pouch and your balls in the other. It's a total game changer whether you're working

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Everything I see of her just makes me like her more every Every clip that pops up, there's a clip she talked about, did you see the clip where she talked about her husband dying and she committing suicide and she takes her daughter out? Have you seen this? Pull this shit up, it's fucking beautiful. This is like why I love comedy, man. She's a fucking legend. Is it funny?

Oh yeah. Oh okay, okay. It doesn't, it's not at first, I mean it was a suicide, but she makes it funny. That's why she's such a fucking legend. Yeah, no, she was great. I mean, her- I can do the short version of it.

I mean, she basically builds up how brutal it is, you know, to lose your husband to suicide, and she's out with her daughter, they're at this fancy restaurant, they both can't say a word, and she basically, she looks at the menu, and she goes, oh my God, the prices. He'd be glad he killed himself.

And she gets the first laugh out of the kid. Oh fuck that's a beautiful thing that she had that she had that ability. That's great. She's just so cool I don't know if you saw the doc on her. I love the doc. Well no we no no no it was this might be it but go skip to the end because it's I mean I just told the joke. I mean Seinfeld said the same that everybody hates Seinfeld right now he's having having a tough month, but is he oh, yeah Oh, he's getting dragged online like crazy. That's but it's but do they hate him I think it's some ways probably more fans than ever

Yeah, maybe but he's getting a lot of shit in a lot of shit And he's getting the genocide Jerry shit at the shows whatever But he did that speech and like ten people walked out at a college and the news grabbed that all these people walk out on Jerry whatever but the speech was actually really poignant but no one talked about the speech because they just talked about the walkout but he had a whole thing about like this generation is very kind you guys are all about compassion and all that but you're not great laughers so you got to learn to laugh at dark shit or you're gonna have a long fucked up sad life yeah and it's like what you said gonna have a long fucked up sad life. Yeah.

And it's like what you said. It's a great message. It's a great message. And it's also like that, what she said is like healing. Like she, maybe it's because that generation went through more. Yeah. I mean, because I think it's like if you don't make it, when you go through something that traumatic like a husband committing suicide and you don't make a joke out of it, you're

fucking finished. Yeah. Yeah, man. Comedy is like, I mean, I don't wanna, you don't wanna get too deep on it, but like a couple years ago, when I lost my mom, I lost my mom to cancer. And I remember like on her last days,

we were in the hospital room and it was still some of the funniest things that happened. Really? It was obviously the saddest thing, but like comedy still ensues. Like you still find a humor. Like at one point, one of my family members hired like a witch doctor to come in.

That was supposed to heal her. And he came in and like Crocs and like camel, like camels and we were like, who the fuck is that? And the guy who attacks Elicu? Yeah, yeah, yeah. They were like, oh, that's the guy. And he like looks at it and he's like, she's gonna be okay. And she like died like a couple hours ago.

I was like, that was, if she were alive, she would think that was hilarious. Yeah. I think like that this is- You do a bit about it. No, I haven't done a bit of it It's so great But it was so like it was like till this day like you hold back We were holding back tears just laughing at how funny and ridiculous this was and he got paid like $5,000 Family member made him like $5,000 Family member made him like $5,000. What are you Dominican?

Cuz you know that he was I guess in a way he's like this is my last dying thing to try to help yeah Yeah, it's funny. That's a gig to that guy. His agent was like I got you a dead lady in Queens Yeah, yeah literally like we walked into the room and he was like in the, like we were talking and we didn't notice that there was like a guy in like a rain jacket, cargo shorts and crocs like in the corner and he's like praying and then we were like, we figured it was like a guy cleaning the hospital room and then we look, we were like who the fuck is that? And then my sister's like, oh that's like, that's the witch doctor that's here to heal. And then he like comes over and he he's like he like looks at her He's she's like he's like she's that like 60% now. That's what he said. She's not like 60%

Yeah, he's like she's like like 60% and we like obviously but we couldn't we want to die laughing We also don't want to disrespect right right and then he like does like three things and he's like she's gonna be okay Yeah Like just do like three prayers and laughing it made like five grand. Yeah, and who paid for this? Oh, uncle my oh my god. I'm sure he gets his money up front cuz this guy Yeah, then he called before miracles then he called us like later on that night and was like this is kind of crazy But he called us later on that night and was like the guy just called me and said he's he's in The cemetery praying so he should be okay Wow, did you hear anything when she passed away? Did he say anything? Yeah, he said you called me too late. Yeah

Did he do crowd work on? He said you had it was too late. She was already at like 60% you gotta call me like I'm not even making so I know it sounds great Did he do some voodoo shit and sprinkle stuff? It was so not like it, cause like I'm figuring like if you pay me $5,000, I'm gonna do those things. Yes. I might come with like a bottle, you know,

I'll pour Bodega Cat in the corner. Yes, something. And like, you know, I'll burn a candle. He didn't do any of that. What? Like he was just like. No showmanship. No showmanship.

He was just like. Damn. And then just walked out. That is hilarious. I'm so sorry about your mom and dad. Yeah, no, of course. You guys are really close. No showmanship. No showmanship. He was just like, and then just walked out. That is hilarious. I'm so sorry about your mom about that. Yeah, no, of course. You guys were really close.

Yeah, yeah, we were super, super close. Yeah, no, but that was, I mean, if she were alive, the funny thing about that is like if she were there, she would be like, what the fuck are you doing to him? Like get the fuck out of here. Like she would just call it out. So it was so funny that she wasn't there to be able to be like, get the fuck out of here. Right, right. She was under, she was like, nah. Oh yeah, it was in funny that she wasn't there to be able to be like get the fuck out of it, right? She was under she was like, oh, yeah, it was the last days like she had she died from cancer She wasn't even speaking. She was you know cancer's like

Terrible, it's brutal like when you like the last days But um, but yeah, it was so funny cuz it was her road of like call people out on their bullshit But I said all that to say It made me like love comedy even more, cause I was like, comedy just sleeps through us, like through the cracks of the door. You can't keep it out, like it's impossible. You need it, I'm sure in like times of war,

I'm sure those foxholes were hilarious. Right. It's the shit they were saying. Yeah. It's the only way to cope. Right. That's what they say when they stop joking, like they're fucked.

Yeah. What would you, are there any comedies that you remember of funny things you remember watching that you were like, oh fuck, just like numb the pain a little? After? Yeah. After not so much, after for me it was standup.

Like, and I don't want to get too deep in the standup thing, but it kind of showed me that a lot of times we try to downplay like the stuff we do, like, oh, we're just telling dick jokes, whatever. We're just doing the whatever, we're clowns, whatever. But in that moment, like I remember spending the whole day at the hospital with my mom and then going to the cellar and doing spots, and it was the only thing

that would drag me out of that depression. And then also I realized that there was people in the audience that was going through the same thing and we were providing a service for them. So stand up wise, it made me respect it more. And it also made me more confident in the sense, you know how sometimes you're on stage and it might be like Chappelle or Louie in the back and you're like fuck like I want to do good or

whatever it made me be more confident of like I don't give a fuck who's in the back like this is me I do this this is what I do I'm like I've been doing this I put into work this is what I do I'm on stage is my time so that's great gave me that confidence that's good yeah it is weird about stand-up you ever get the guy in the street like thank you for what you do man, you got me through some tough times and you're like, oh I'm just telling jokes, you know, that's great, I'm not a fireman. But it does help. It does help. A ton. I'm sure you've done the cancer benefits and stuff like that. Yes. I've done those things where like literally like-

I bombed them. I'm a bombing one and going, what is this, the cancer benefit? And they're like, yes. I'm like, oh yeah, fuck what is this, the cancer benefit? And they're like, yes. I'm like, oh yeah, fuck. I've done one for literally a dying 15-year-old girl. Wow. And on her last days, and the parents coming up and being like, thank you so much. This is the darkest time of our lives. We haven't laughed like this.

I'm up there, I'm like, you think you're dying. This is real. Yeah, I mean, we do serve a purpose. I know it don't sound like it because we just you know Write it in these bits, but yeah, no, I know you mean those those People fucking dealing with real shit. Yeah, and I've had those people come up to you with it Like I could never do what you do. What do you do the Navy SEAL? Yeah, I think you probably figured They say in times of tragedy the two things that go up are entertainment and booze. Oh really so we got both Yeah, well that makes sense right yeah

Sometimes like you hear you ever hear like a comic doing a bit. That's like so Positive to them like it's not deprecating at all you're like there's no fun I like is just how successful and how much I get yeah Like it's just how successful and how much I get Where the comics are just like this guy sucks that sucks. That's it's never they suck Yeah, everything else in the world is horrible, but I dated another crazy woman like sounds like there's a pattern here Yeah, yeah, maybe you're not a catch either right yeah, that's that's that one's about me I look at it. I find sometimes like one of the funniest things, like when the, like not the darkest, but like the most awkward shit happened to me, I'm like, well, this is going

to be a bit, so it's okay. Like I had, one time I had a girl try to like, and she was upset, whatever, but she was trying to make fun of my, like, of me, like sexually. And like, she thought it would hurt my feelings. And I was like, this is honestly hilarious and I'm probably gonna tell this on stage. I have to fact that you told me this and she kind of was annoyed.

I was like, I don't care. Erectile dysfunction is hilarious. It's a bit like getting hard, it's not funny. Yeah, that's true. Dude, I have a, it's literally the joke I use in the trailer of my special is a joke with my dick not working. Yeah.

And it's literally a joke. I pulled out and I was like, I had to write this down. Yeah. Yeah, I had to. I literally ruined it. She's like, how can this get any worse for her? Now it's just my dick not working. I'm like, I thought of something funny.

That is great, you know? That's gold. Comics shouldn't use blue chew. We need the material. Yeah. No one wants to hear about how you fucked all night. No. They want blue chew, we need the material. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, no one wants to hear about how you fucked all night. No.

They want to hear about how it went south. Yeah. You're right, anytime something goes badly, it is potential for comedy. Yeah. Because you bond through that shit. Yeah, I think comedians, if you do it that way, if you do it, which, you know,

which if you build material that way, you kind of live life in a weird way where like bad shit happens and you're like, this is nice. Yeah, I'm gonna do this thing. This is good I know like how are you or you just think how do I turn this into a bit? How do I set it up? Yeah, we're like getting punched in the face. I was like, I can't wait to get this videotape There you go Yeah, like I like a Tim Dillon will have a Airbnb fiasco and he has like he got like a year of material out of that Yeah, you know, so we have a gift of we can horrible shit happens. Your mom dies. You're like, alright, I can talk about this

Yeah, I find that like when I when a something happens to me I don't know if you guys find this the hardest part about the bit is like what's my angle in and then I could have the And I can hash out the whole big exactly. I feel the same way check the anger sometimes. Yeah. Yeah One of the first bits in the new special it's like me missing a connect flight I'm gonna drop the whole thing. Exactly. I feel the same way. You have to check the anger sometimes. Yeah, yeah. One of the first bits in the new special, it's like me missing a Connect flight, I missed a gig. It was literally the day my last special came out. I was in such a bad fucking mood.

I was losing it at the gate. I felt the camera phone going up. I'm like, fuck, I'm about to go viral. Yeah. On my special. On the day a special's coming out. Which is great. Well, I had to check myself.

All right, settle. I had a few drinks in the next flight and I was like, this is kind of funny. I'm taking me three flights to get to a gig I don't get to performing. Yeah, yeah. And I started like, right, I was like, this might be a bit, and then I did it there and it started working.

I'm like, all right, you're on the right track. Just kidding. There you go. Little dumb stuff going wrong in your life. It's, I have in my new in my new the new hour I'm doing I have this story about one time I went on a date with this girl and we got back to her place and Her roommates cat had passed away and she wanted me to like to remove the dead cat for her. Oh my god Yeah, and it's a nice day, and it's a true story

It's like the it's like hits the hardest in my whole act It's a true story But it happened like four years ago, and I just didn't know the angle into it. So I didn't know how to get into it. And one day it just came to me like out of like some other material, I'm like, oh, I can take it from there to here. And then it was just like a five minute bit.

That's the best. Yeah, that's the best. When you're doing that, what do you do? Do you stash it away in like a word doc or something? Or like, do you keep an inventory or something? I just have the stories. I find like, since I started a podcast, just talking it out, like you bring something up and I'll just be like, oh, I have that story.

And then sometimes you hear a clip or, and people will tell you like, oh, you got to do this on stage. So you'll really start like a friend. Yeah. Yeah. They'll be like, you got to do this. But once somebody says you got to do this, I panic. You panic.

Yeah. The pressure's on. Yeah. Like DeVito has that great joke where he's like my mom's yeah Ex-mafia wife she's dating a blind black guy and she we live with our grandma Who's a hairstylist and I've never felt more pressure to write a joke Yeah, and then he got a joke out of the trying to write a joke. Yeah. Yeah, that's a I always think about that joke, too But I like I was saying it's just finding the entryway in it cuz like I'm like on its own This story is a funny story.

But how can I convey how I felt at the time? It's funny. And then one day it just came to me, I'm like, the angle I used to get into it, I'm like, women, it's funny to see what women consider masculine now. Like now, I'm like, I think you ladies just label stuff masculine because y'all don't wanna do it,

so you want us to do it. And then you just make us do dumb shit that nobody should. And then I go into the cat story, and everyone's like, yes, that is a perfect example of the premise you just said. And isn't it funny, that sounds so natural,

but you had to come up with it. No, it took me four years. Yeah, exactly. Four years for that one line that gave me this five minute chug story. That would show you some time. Exactly. Some of my best shit took four years.

I remember there was a story about Lenor Cohn and Bob Dylan having dinner, drinks, whatever, and they're talking about like, Leonard Cohen's like, oh, I love this song you wrote. It's one of my favorite songs you ever wrote. And he goes, I wrote it in like 15 minutes. And he's like, oh, geez. And he goes, I love that song, Hallelujah. And Leonard Cohen goes, took me five years.

Yeah, look at that. You know, it's like sometimes shit takes a while. I know. And as comics, we're hard on ourselves. I'll go up at the cellar and I'll watch the comics the comics before I'm like that's killer. That's better than anything I have that's great. And I think they all just came up with it. It probably took him years Yeah, you know you watch the good conversation. They make it look easy Yeah, the sellers are the weird thing cuz I've been at the seller now for like five years

and I remember like being like the new guy at the seller where you just think you're like the shit cuz you're just like Doing your first hot 15 and just murdering. Yeah, and then once you transition into like a guy who's been there for a certain time Then the new guy's yes, and they're murdering and then you're like, oh, but you're doing your hot 15 All right, you got to do this like 15 times you have to like turn it over and continue to do it So it kind of but I like I like that thing of like You kind of gotta you gotta do it though. That's why it's like the major leagues You got exactly you got these the new guys coming in with their heat

So you gotta bring the heat you got to stay on your toe You got to work on new but also match their kill It's it's a whole dynamic there a lot of people like baseball in a lot of ways Yeah, yeah, like Seinfeld's got the great analogy about like this then you know know The the line above nine and you sub in like oh this one's not pulling its weight anymore Yeah, right, right. That's it feels so much like baseball, right? It is and I think that you know you a lot of people like oh they don't like Doing their new stuff at the cellar like, you know, they feel the pressure and I feel like I don't know a better room to do The new one of like sold out sold out hot crowd. They're listening and they don't know a better room to do the new stuff. Good point. Sold out. Sold out, hot crowd, they're listening.

And they don't know you a lot of the time. Right. Like, just crushing for your crowd is one thing, but like, I wanna make sure this works universally. Oh yeah. Yeah. Well I think a lot of comics, you know, they, like when they consider working out new,

they don't have a bit, they'll just have an idea. So they'll like go on stage and just say the idea, a thousand times, eventually they'll find it. But I'm more, I like to have it written, like I like to have a bit, they'll just have an idea. So they'll go on stage and just say the idea, a thousand times eventually they'll find it. But I'm more, I like to have it written, I like to have a bit. Yes. It might not work, but this is a bit. It's set, I have the thing, I could get out of it.

Yeah. Some people are just like, hmm. I don't have the balls to do that. I don't have the balls. Like this guy came out, he paid money, he's on the date, and I'm like, anything here? And Frank, man. Yeah, yeah.

And Chase. I see it, I'm like, man,? And Frank, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And Tasty. I see it, I'm like, man, that's courage. That's crazy. I know, well, Mike Birbiglia said a thing, and now when I write, I think about it and it fucked me up. He goes, when you're writing, think where would I laugh? Right. Because when you're writing, you're like,

oh, this is funny, this is good, this will work, I'll try it up there. And then you're like, where would I actually laugh? And then it makes you go nowhere. Nowhere. This sucks, you know, but I assume, oh, I'm a funny guy, I would I actually laugh? And then it makes you go nowhere. Nowhere. This sucks, you know? But I assume, oh, I'm a funny guy, I'm a comedian, I'll make it work, but.

Right, but that's how all your shit should be. Like, if you were a screenplay, you're like, I wanna make something that I would wanna see. Yes, yes. Make it for you, and then hope, if it's that personal, I think it will be hopefully universal if you keep owning it. Yeah, Jim Jeffery said that.

He was like, they're like, how do you come up with materials? Like, I just write shit I'd wanna hear. Yeah. I was like, oh, wow, that Jeffery said that he was like they're like well How do you come up with materials like I just write shit? I'd want to hear yeah I was like oh, that's interesting. Yeah, like what there's a slippery slope cuz some people just want to hear themselves That's true. That's true. Like no funniness. Just yeah pontificate about what's right and wrong about the world a point Well, I look you got to be good Yeah, yeah, you can't just be like self-indulgent It's it's got to be like for I guess maybe like a combination

But it's like what I would want to see is in like if it weren't about me and so you know what I mean like Not for me, but for me if I was an audience member Yeah, yeah you you get indulgent and it's like yeah, we've all seen those comics and you're like Wait, where do you think? This is crazy. It's crazy. Yeah, I mean this an inherent self-indulgence to this art form Yes that you need right? Yeah, you need to think that you not getting an erection is funny And right not something that no one gives a fuck about you need to think that but there's a thing of like but I want To make it palatable. I don't want to just say it like, there's a lot of comics you see who, you know,

they just, they have no problem just telling you about their day. I know. And they think everything's an achievement. They're like, so I'm bi. That's not even a comment. You're like, bi. That's not even, that's like, scraped. Yeah, that's nothing now.

By the way, you think you're like, so I get to fuck everybody? Yeah. Like the fact that your mom died and you didn't make that your whole career is commendable I've never done a bit about I've ever well some people I feel like I'm funny right there We said yeah, maybe the witch doctor, but some people's grandma died. They're like alright. This is my end And I'm like why is this your end you should be mourning your grandma. They're workshopping stuff They're like the casket They got a long day on Facebook. They just want the likes. I'm like,

so you trading your grandma's death for the likes. You're a sick fuck. I remember at the funeral when this is when I was like, I got to pull out my notepad at the funeral. One of my family members went up to make a speech and just went on like an anti-vax rant of like, do I know what, like he knew no one should get the vaccine. And this is like a perfect example. The boosters would kill me. He was like, he's no one should get the vaccine and this is like a perfect example. The boosters would kill me, let's be honest. He was like, he's never gonna get it and this is why. How dare you use a fucking funeral for a platform?

I know, and everyone was just looking at themselves like. Well, you had Terrence Howard at your funeral, what do you expect? Come on. I love what Rich Voss said, I think it was at Patrice's funeral after his speech. He goes, I'll be selling CDs in the corner here. Yeah, yeah.

That happened before, I saw Big Jay did a speech at Dave, my manager who passed Dave Kimmel. I saw that, he crushed. He murdered. Murdered. Really? Murdered. Like I have not seen. Even harder than Dave was murdered. Yeah He actually got killed was one of the most tragic thing that was one of the most tragic thing

It was one of the saddest funerals. He was like 42 43 He was like no there was nothing that could make you feel like this is part of life You know, my mom passed from cancer her 60s is a part of where you can be like This is a transition of life right you get older get older, you get sick, you pass away. Dave's funeral was- 60s is so young though. It is, but Dave's funeral was not like that, right? It was like, this is a tragic thing that happened.

And it was just a sad, sad funeral and Big Jay went up and just murdered, like start to finish. Like we were like clean, we were like, you gotta send a set to Fallon. Like this is the cleanest, like just hilarious, 20 minutes of just murdering, like we left the funeral like feeling like good.

No mention. I did crowd work at that one. I was like. Big J, no mention of Asian pussy? No Asian puss. Wow, good for you, J. DeRosa crushed that one too. Really?

Yeah, it was great. Well, the hard thing is, like you think DeRosa's annoying with shots in regular life, try going to a funeral with. DeRosa crush that one too. Really? Yeah, he was great. Well, the hard thing is, you think DeRosa's annoying with shots in regular life. Try going to a funeral with Joe DeRosa. He's trying to get around him, he's like, shot! You're like, all right, fuck him. Guess tomorrow's washed. I couldn't love DeRosa.

I know we sit on cop, but it's a real thing. It's like a real thing that we do here. You gotta use it. Yeah, you gotta cope. I mean, and then it's just so cool we have such funny friends who can just go up and riff and kill we know some of the funniest people on the planet yeah that's that's pretty wild like cuz you know that just go being funny at a funeral that's like no he didn't put out a notepad exactly I'm just going do you want that at your funeral just no I'm

like no one had to joke where he's like there'll be time to for celebration but No pad exactly. I'm just going do you want that at your funeral just no I'm like Norm had the joke where he's like there'll be time to for celebration, but right now we're sad He had that great bit knob yeah, I would why I don't care. Where do we where do we? You know you tell some stories, and then you'd be funny. I got a whole witch doctor bit I want to do it. Yeah, no I died I Did tell all the store only tell my stories of my funeral if my wife is dead, too What was a murder suicide of course we can't yeah, I'm poisoning her she's going down Just so you guys can tell some real stories. Can I give you a wreck by the way, please? I watch them and you might know this one. I watched the movie. I'd never seen it

I fucking I bought it just on a whim. Someone told me it was great and I was, it wasn't streaming, I was like fuck it, it's in Barnes and Noble, all that jazz. Oh yeah, Mark's watching it right now, yeah. It's great, right? Mark's watching it right now, right? I'm halfway through, I haven't gotten to the ending yet.

What do you think, so? I'm loving it, I'm loving it. It's a dark ass musical, but it's fucking amazing. You gotta go to Barnes andie Nova to get this I Mean you guys have that illegal stream where you guys use that's where you find it It's there's I'm sure there's I think it's on to be or something. It's on to be yeah, it'll be free right yeah It's fucking awesome. It's Roy Scheider from Jaws and It's really great guy Bob Fossey who did like cabaret and Pippen and all these music poon hound drug addict

Yeah, yeah, I'm gonna mark So he's like a gay guy. I'm like nice like fucking all the dancers. It's like a crazy story, but uh It's it's a fucking good movie, dude. So I was just telling mark at lunch I was like, oh Bob Fosse came up with all these moves for the movie The Little Prince sort of I think is an early 70s or late 60s. It's a pickup line. Yeah Michael Jackson just straight ripped all these moves. Yeah. Can I show it to you?

Sure. This is pretty crazy knowing where Michael Jackson got his moves. The music that added later. That's Fosse right there. Oh, is it? Yeah. Oh, wow. Oh, this is the guy? This is the guy. That Mike got his right there. Yeah. Well is it yeah? Oh, this is the guy. This is the guy that might got his moves from supposedly

And so they put a Michael Jackson song over it just so you can really get the feel Oh, you ripped off more than the moves you ripped off the age Oh, you ripped off more than the moves you ripped off the age Is this Confirmed that this came first before Mike. Oh, this is early 70s, okay? Damn, oh you can see it. Yeah, you can see it for sure damn wow black people steal moonwalking here, too But our moves like bits no, but you know you got to get that style from somewhere oh Man, this is crazy. I had no idea You just figure MJ is such a legend that yeah, I'm breaker

He must have thought of all this, but I always kind of figured it was a choreographer behind the moves I didn't think he was making them over. I thought thought he made them I thought MJ did it damn this is crazy yeah he's very yeah he's no shit well it's a good movie man Chad this is the movie no no it's not the movie but he's fucking he directed he's not in it it's about him it's about like a heart. He had where he like contemplated life, and he's like oh Yeah Boy Scheider plays him. He's fucking I mean such a such a good actor always good But like yeah, the cast is sick the music's sick. It's awesome. It's great. It's fun

Yeah, I'm not I'm not done with you, but that was like Tony Woods and Chappelle right there That's a deep cut. That's a deep cut. Yeah, what you guys got any wrecks? I got a peeve you got a peeve the heroin thing Oh the heroin thing. I got a wreck though, but please please I just started watching this yesterday. It's a new show on Apple TV It got Jake. I don't know if you guys presumed innocent. Presumed innocent. Have you guys done it? I'm into it. I'm like three episodes in I I'm into it apples got some good shit Apple I think like all the shows on Apple are they don't market them. Well, they don't know they don't hard to find yeah But they're really good hard to find like Sam Arrell in the home school Amazon Prime video

They do like they went like Emmys and stuff though. Yeah, but they'd be hard to find in a sin sick. It's good I like it. It's it's captivating It's it's good. I watched a Tyler Perry movie man. I Can't help but like you watch it, and I like immediately know what's happening. Yeah, like I'm immediately It's not great. Yeah, it's moving up you moved up Sam. Oh there you go I just people are watching or one swipe away rather than two oh Baby all right. Let's hustle right after Pat and Oswald. He's still beating you Damn game show. I think this is great. I think have being on multiple platforms is great

I think so too spread the love. Yeah, the effect the gaffigan effect spread it out All right, that's a good. That's a good wreck. So I'm watching perusing was innocent too and I realized something. What's that? I'm only three. I'm watching Presuming He's Innocent 2, and I realized something. What's that? I'm only three. I'm not gonna spoil anything. Uh, I think there's only four episodes out anyway. Six. Oh, okay, I'm only on four.

So what I realized is, everyone on the show thinks he's guilty. The only one presuming he's innocent is us! For some reason, we're presuming he's innocent. Ooh, interesting. Oh, that's interesting. Alright. That's interesting. Alright.

Yeah, I love a who did it murder show Those are really interesting. Yeah, it was a really good one of those you ever see a rip Donald Sutherland, but the undoing that was sick No, I never saw the end on HBO HBO. Yeah, that was good. You grand and Nicole kid. That was good It was really good. That was good, and it's it's yeah. I won't say nothing, but it's good I don't know the undoing. Yeah, it's fucking solid. It's good mark. I thought you watched it I think you did watch it. I thought we talked about it You had to watch this. This was like a thing during my holy I'll go back. You remember this. I don't find her attractive What's wrong with me Nicole Kidman? Am I gay? Why don't I why am I not into her? She's you're gay skinny as hell. She's got no curves. She looks like a

She looks like she wouldn't be fun to hang out with is that what you look for in women Yeah, I want a fun lady pull up Nicole Kim and to die for you're out of your mind. No the undoing is good All right, I'll check out the end is it is it supernatural no, okay good. I can't do that. No. She's hot dude He's hot there. All right. Yeah, come on. Look at No. She's hot, dude. She's hot there. She's all right, yeah. Come on, look at that. She's pretty, she's just not my cup. All right. Too skinny, too vanilla.

I like a little weirdness in her face. Well, there's your weirdness right there. Holy shit. You're on board, buddy? She was great in Ghostbusters 2 and the painting. What was that guy? Vigo? Zool. Thank you, Matt.

Zool, thank you. All right, good recs. Good rec, presumed innocent. I'll check it out. I watched one and it was heavy. Maybe too heavy. You just watched one up? Yeah.

Yeah, it gets more. Oh, geez. Apple's got some shit though. But Apple's got some shit. He turned me on to Manhunt. I love that. I love Manhunt. That's the prison one? No, John Wilkes Bo shit though, but I put us. I'm he turned me on a manhunt. I love that and I love man That's the prison one. No John Wilkes Booth. Oh, no. Yeah, I heard I heard about that when I got a watch I was good slow horses my favorite one on there though. That's like

Which one is the one um where he goes to prison and he has to get the oh? Yeah, yeah, that was good to Blackbird Blackbird. It was good. It wasn't great There's hijack I think there was another one that one has that was not great But it's entertaining is about a hijacked airplane. I don't know if it's called hijacked, but you just elbows that lead Oh, I like yeah, yeah, all right Man, he was that when he was on Luther that show is fucking oh, yeah, they went hard on that show They might have like blew their wad a little early because they went so fucking hard Yeah, but he's yeah. Did you know him when he was the security at Cowlens? No, but Artie Lang told me he used to sell him coke He did

Idris did to him. Yeah Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, apparently was cool as fuck. He was also calling him eldest. Yeah It's kind of funny. Yeah, but he said he was the man. I mean, he was giving him drugs, he probably liked them, but. I've been watching this series on Hulu, it's called like the Dark Side of the 2000s. And one of the episodes, it's actually a two episode part, it's about the shock jock era.

On the radio? Yeah, it's about Howard Stern and Opie and Anthony. And like the wars that they had. Oh, I watched the hell out of that. It's pretty interesting, there's two episodes on it. It's really good though. They talk about like the- What's this on?

Hulu. This is on Vice TV. Yeah, I got it on Hulu. Oh, okay. Crazy the way those two went. Like Opie and Anthony is, you know, Kumi had his thing, Opie's doing whatever the fuck,

and then Howard Stern went like super progressive. It's crazy on that. Yeah, they talk about all that They talk some of the stuff Stern was doing oh kind of forget you're like wow the blackface this would not yet This would not fly at all no Matteo is Matteo loves Howard Stern He was telling me I had to listen to the Richard Simmons Howard Stern interview. Oh, those are funny. Yeah, they're hilarious I grew up on Stern a huge fan. Yeah, well they talk about how they bring on Norton like to like because according to the documentary Opie and Anthony were beefing and they brought on Norton. It'll be like the middle guy

Show buffer. Yeah, it's just what Norton was such a sniper back. Yeah, Mike is still yes New shit is fucking amazing trans stuff before anybody. Yeah. Yeah, no, it's great. I love Noyan here. His new shit is fucking amazing. Trans stuff before anybody. Yeah, yeah. Noyan's great. He's the Jackie Robinson, mangled pussy. Except he's asking someone to spit on him. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Woo, oh there's Stern, look at that.

This is why you go super woke, cause you're like, all right, I gotta cover my ass here. Robin just taking it. It another fucking wreck by the way we know Lou Gehrig book it's fucking incredible oh yeah hold uh fuck look up the most popular it's fucking great is he's not the racist that's Ty Cobb yeah Ty Cobb was racist he's the ice ice bucket challenge. Yeah, ALS. Yeah, ALS. That's what I meant.

So funny, this guy fucking died at 36, and everyone's like, I'll pour some cold water. That's your quality. I did it, I did it. You would've done the challenge. Is it luckiest man? Yeah, it's great, I love it. Luckiest?

I consider him the luckiest man in the world today. Yeah, it's brutal, man. But he was, I mean, he was a fucking crusher. He crushed the ball and he, I mean, three of his siblings died. He was the only one that survived. You just had a kid back then, you were like, we'll see. Yeah. Yeah.

Crazy, but yeah, I love it. It's excellent. And it's like, those old Yankees books are fucking awesome. I just love those old baseball books. Oh yeah. Something like 170 RBIs when you're hitting after Babe Ruth. Yeah. Really? So that's when Babe Ruth cleared the bases 60 times

by hitting home runs, still came through with 170 rebbe's. Oh, Babe Ruth is a fucking party animal too. The babe stories are so funny. He was just always getting loaded. Yeah, just drunk. And he was funny and he was an everyman and he would fuck up, but everyone loved him even more. Yeah.

And he, I mean that's what they would do. They would just go out. It was like an immigrants game back then, like really an immigrants game. So they were like, oh this is for like, you know. This is like, you look down on it. But it became so popular because it was a blue collar sport. And Babe Ruth, like they'd go get fucked up

after every game. And try to just chase women. Yeah, he ate like three steaks a day, a gallon of whiskey, cigars, and pussy. And back then, there was no such thing as condoms or anything. So every girl is just raw. And I don't think they were pulling out, probably.

Probably not. It'd be rude. Yeah, it'd be disrespectful condom. So it makes you think, what are we doing now? No. We need to be. Well, back then, yeah, you got an abortion. It was less diseases, you think like, what are we doing now? No. We need to be. Well, back then, yeah, you got an abortion. It was less diseases, you think?

I think there was less diseases, and I think there was no internet. So you could just be like, hey, whore, get away from me. I don't know, dude. Babe Ruth died at like 50. It was the greatest death. But he lived fast. He lived hard.

Well, dude, he also had like mistresses. It was this whole thing, like, I want to have a perfect year I want to like not get injured. Maybe I'll drink a little less. Oh, hopefully my wife doesn't catch my mistresses this year That was like his scouting report Fucking amazing. Yeah, it was a better time. Every time he has stories like that like you hear like Chamberlain like oh, yeah You're like where this doesn't even sound like realistic like I know no blue true. No nothing No, but you know what a hundred points in the game didn't sound realistic back then either Chamberlain was fucking never use that type of guy Yeah, you know the problem is it doesn't sound fun. You're fucking that many. No it doesn't sound fun

Like a certain point you come and now you're just hanging out with strangers every yes. Yes. Yeah It's like yeah, Williams with the seven thousand books. It's too much. It's too much. You can't keep that up. Yeah Yeah, but he was like it wasn't like fairy tales. No, no Astrophysicist you think we'd bump into a woman who fucked Will Chamberlain by now Like I'm sure I've met a woman at a grocery store who fucked Will Chamberlain Just numbers wise statistically. It's not gonna come up. Hey, can you pass the milk by the way? If I had that story I'd be like, can I get the bread, by the way?

I fucking will tear it apart. Yeah. Yeah, that's a big one. Oh, I'm sure he was huge. What was your peeve, Mark? Oh, sorry. I got two. How about the first one's annoying and weird.

You're not gonna agree with it. I don't like when the waitress or a waiter comes up and we got a bunch of stuff going on, I'm eating, and she comes up and she wants to give you a plate but she has to hand it to you. Just put it on the table, right there. I can't do the handing off, just put it on the table. Right, yeah.

All right, I knew everybody would hate that one. I don't hate it, it's not one that really bothers me, but we're usually on exactly the same level so I know this next one's gonna be a fucking... Alright, how about this one? The guy where you tell them a story and they focus on the wrong point of the story. You know, you go, so I was on 45th Street. I got punched in the face. 45th and I think

6 in Hell's Kitchen. They go, that's not Hell's Kitchen. I was like, I got punched in the. Like I got punched in the face! I was punched in the face! Let's focus on that! I knew the second one would be a winner. He's back! I'm back! That's fucking hilarious.

Focus on the wrong thing! I think I'm that guy. You are that guy! I think I'm that guy. Native New Yorker. His story doesn't make sense. Yeah, yeah. But the face punching is the meat of it.

Yeah. But we're all focused on what neighborhood I was in. That's like, you know, that's like Brian Park. Yeah, yeah. I punching is the the meat of it. Yeah, but we're all focused on what neighborhood I was in That's like you know, it's Brian Park. Yeah My thing is people will be like people will be like the premise would be like Hell's Kitchen is so dangerous I was in Hell's Kitchen. I got punch in the face. It's got it and I'm like, that's not Hell's Kitchen. Yes. Yes That I get it. Can we get back to the face punching? Yeah, I see that's annoying. That's all I'm asking. Yeah, you're right.

I can't believe this guy punched you in the face still. I honestly can. I mean, yeah, I guess the city's going down the toilet. Yeah, the city, that's like a normal story. You can believe that? Well, I remember like Joe List used to tell all these stories about like the kooks like out of here. And I thought he was like lying and exaggerating.

I chilled with him one time and the amount of like guys that were we were in Vegas Walking down and it was literally like walking dead like following Joe and I'm dying laughing and Joe's like you see people think I'm lying It's like when mosquitoes just go after one He's got the glasses the forehead the face They think flock to him like moths to a flood they really do they really do yeah, he's not kidding Poor guy which is moving out of the city right he said he's been saying that he says But we were in New Orleans once we were out at a brunch and Andy Haynes was like shut the fuck up with your kook shit

What are you crazy, and we look out the window as a guy getting stabbed? He's like shut the fuck up with your cook shit. What are you crazy and we look out the window as a guy getting stabbed And he's like you see and he's like shut up He's like what do I gotta do to prove my point guys bleeding out of his stomach I love that scene in Harold and Kumar where they're like hey, man They look at the window those guys kind of look like us and they just look at them and it's too strange to start beating the shit out of them It's a great scene. That's an underrated. That's an underrated. yeah, that's a good. That's a classic. Yeah, I like that one They go to White Castle. Yes. Yeah, they made two of them even going on old Bay's okay. It's not bad

I never caught that I didn't see a cock meat sandwich That's not the best sales pitch It's I mean, it's a dumb comment. It's funny. What happened to those guys one of the guys started working for Obama one of them? Okay, yeah, it was in the fucking white ones gay. I think the same one. Yeah, it worked for Obama Cal Penn How was gay yeah? He's gay mm-hmm And the Henry Cho yeah, he's a good actor. I want to say he was in some really good indie movie called Columbus He's good Henry and he was in scar Star Trek. Oh was he yeah, is he Spock or no Hulu?

Sulu that's him no wrong guy. I'm like old that's wrong. That's a comedian like doing stand-up. Oh, yeah It's John show not Henry John Henry chose a he's like a southern Asian guy really yeah, he's serious Johnny Cho All handsome Johnny. Yeah, he's good. He was in a thriller. He was in like an he's been on some good shit Yeah, he's good Asians are hot like fuckable now. Yeah, no Get nobody dated a no white woman Asians are in and the rodents the rodent men have you heard this no Yeah, like that's the old rodent white men. Yeah, like I wroteent white man. Oh, yeah, what is rodent white men? Yeah, like that's like that. It's like rodent men summer like I from the bear

There we go like these are just like hot now Well, you look like an aunt or like a like a mouse like a mouse. It's hot. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, by the way I'm looking forward to cockroach winter Mark has a fun fact about the guy in the middle Mark has a fun fact about the guy in the middle. Do I? You told me. 5'7"? No, it's Gene Wilder's grandson.

That's right. You can see it on the face. No he's not. That's what Mark told me. That feels like something made up. Give it a go. Is that real? I don't know his name.

Jeremy Allen White. He's like 5'7"? Yeah. That's what I like about Hollywood. It's like a lot of short guys win and they really put you like... Because when they win, everyone wins below them. Kevin Hart being super popular and getting a ton of women helps me.

Oh, same with Tom Cruise, Dustin Hoffman, you know they're all tiny. Tiny, it's like fat chicks. One begets more. Yeah, like when the Kardashians started dating black guys, that was real big for our community. Interesting. Yeah, it normalized it and every girl wanted a black guy.

Yeah, I mean, what's her face? Yeah, that's interesting. It's not true. Ah, fuck. It looks like it's true. They look like his son. I know, the hair, the eyes, the nose. Grandpa, yeah.

Nothing? Not true. Damn. All right, took a shot. But yeah,. No, not sure damn All right. Yeah, they're good shot Yeah, but yeah black guys. What's her fit Kylie was dating tiger. That was nice, too He's short too. Is he yeah. Oh wow five five damn black and short. That's double strike No, it's great Like they really normalize like you walking through a red carpet and your girls like five inches taller than you

Yeah, and the regular girls are like oh we can do it if Kylie's doing Right. Oh that makes sense. Yeah, I mean big asses were not in I think they kind of changed the game on that I think they're kind of out. I think they're out now. I think they're out. Yeah, it's back to like super skinny That's like back. Big asses are always welcome I mean in the 90s it was like boob right if you said you got a fat ass to a girl She was like fuck you. Yeah You're watching. I still feel like they're not thrilled. Eh, fat ass is a compliment now. Nah, it is now.

Watch like a rap video from like the early 2000s. The women, you're like, these are girls that work at like Starbucks. It's not like what it is now. Yeah. It's just like girls with pretty faces. Pull em up. Yeah, those old hip hop by the pool videos. Yeah.

Yeah those were a lot of normal looking ladies. Just normal looking, attainable. Ah these are girls that are very attractive. Yeah but they're normal, they're not like, they don't have crazy bodies. Right. Now who's this? Chingy? Don't you feel like, you look around now, people are like crazy fit now.

Good. Yeah. Let's get it back going. You ever see that doc? You know what's a really good doc? You ever see that one, bigger, stronger, faster? No. About the people on steroids?

It's really good, but it just shows you how over time, the male body type just changed. GI Joe type bodies in the 80s was one thing, and then pro wrestling changed. Now look at pro wrestlers, you're like, this dude's gonna fucking die yeah oh my god they're too big yeah yeah the 50s the guys like bodybuilders they're just solid there's no definition they're smooth now they're like chiseled 12-pack tits yeah big guns too much yeah I find

that like what women want changed to like now dad bods are like hot Yeah, be like fat and ugly Women are weird cuz they're like I like that you're fat cuz I feel hotter cuz yeah, that's I don't have that yeah, I'm not like oh good. You're in a wheelchair I Had a girl tell me she was like a tiny petite look girl was like that she dated a guy that was like 400 pounds She couldn't been more than 120 pounds. Yeah, I thought that was hot. Oh Well, I mean we're lucky as men. No, I didn't mentally challenge women cuz I want to feel smart Exactly

We've been a few in this episode. I'm like oh, he's gonna come back to bite us which ones Getting a man a retarded woman. That's open-minded. It is open-minded inclusive. I hope you guys remember that in the comments I think it was big head We took it to fuck you went down son on him. Has anything you ever said here came back to haunt you? No. I don't think so. It's all bullshit.

There's too much. There's too much stuff out there. You know, they could easily do it, but it'd be a lot of work to find the right one. Yeah. Damn, which one do we do? Yeah. If you blow up on something, then they might. You gotta blow up on something.

And I think people have caught on that sometimes it makes the person more powerful. Yes. So they're less, they're like, well, if we caught on that sometimes it makes the person more powerful. Yes. So they're less, they're like, well if we pull this out he might just become more famous. Yeah. So she kinda just chill out. When Shane got SNL, finally got the hosting gig, TMZ put out a thing, like here's him saying

f*** all this shit and every, I read every comment because I'm a psycho. Every comment was like, like it more now, bigger fan. Yeah, I'm watching this week, tuning in. Yes, can't wait to watch, subscribing. We're just saying I like like it more now. Yeah, I'm watching this week tuning Yeah, subscribe we're just say I like a person more So it's just like just shut the fuck up like just don't like just don't do that It's your motives are so fucking obvious. I know it's just just don't post that exactly

It's just like you you want engagement and I guess they don't it's funny because like they they micromanage like whatever type of engagement we can get but for them They're just allowed to be the biggest fucking cockroaches totally and every comments bad But for us, it's like now we try to be like somewhat careful what we like put in a stand-up special, you know but you know that thing with when when that happened with Shane it was funny cuz like It's so weird to see like online trolls when it comes to real life Cuz Shane was the kind of person that like, if you were trolling him and he saw you in real life, he would be like, what was that about?

Yes! And then people would be like, nah, nah, I'll just do it. Yeah, yeah, at least I own it. Yeah, he would be like, why'd you say that? And he would just be like, I don't know. Right, right. He's just thinking, cause they gotta put that out

in the world, okay? I'm better. I saw him do it a couple times. I saw him do it too. I saw him do it one time at the cello I was like, I like he a real he a real dude cuz I won't say who but I Got off stage and Shane and Shane was waiting thing and I'm like, oh Shane you up next and he was like nah Somebody was on stage and he was like we was going back and forth on the internet. Could this will believe it. Who was it?

You'll believe it. Yeah, we'll believe it. Oh on the internet. Could just, well, believe it, who was it? Yo, believe it? Yeah, well, believe it. All right. Oh, wow. Oh, yeah. He was like, he was on stage.

He was like, we've been going back and forth with the thing, on thing, and I wanna, and I'm working at club now, so I wanna, he didn't want beef, but he's like, I wanna be like, hey, I know we've been beefing, but I work at the club now, you know? That's awesome. Yeah, I was like.

That's cool. Yeah, I was like, yo, he's a psychopath. Like, a psychopath. I'm like, do you want want me to do you want me to stay with you? Like I'll stay with you and Shane was like, nah, I'm cool. And I was like, I'm gonna just stay Yeah, I'm gonna just stay cuz there's anything I'm gonna just be like, yo, you know, I'm I'm cool with both y'all Let's just like, you know, it's not here, but he got off stage. They saw each other and it was like love But he got off stage, they saw each other, and it was like love. Like, like,

way to do it. Way to do it. Oh, nah, nah, we just talking shit online. He's like, welcome to the club. Like, you good, you funny as hell. Oh, I love that. Yeah, and I was like, all right, cool. Yeah, no, he actually once texted me something,

like right after that happened. He was like, I heard you were talking shit. And I was like, I don't think so, but you're welcome to tell me where or whatever. And he mentioned it. And I said, oh, I'll give it a listen. I don't think I did. But I don't remember, but it doesn't sound like something I would say. Do so many fucking pods. And he'd let, he'd go listen. He goes, oh, I'll give it a listen. I don't think I did But I don't remember but it doesn't sound like something I would say

Do so many fucking pods and he let he go listen goes. Sorry you didn't I was oh wow You think he had heard that from somebody else? I think people start shit. Yeah, that's a fuck tag a minute Yeah, like I didn't say shit. Yeah, I'm not I'm not you're not that guy. Yeah, no animal did that to me once I was terrified. I said something about him on a pod I open for him somewhere and a bunch of you are hey mark norma shitting on you on Twitter and He was like really and he texted me. He's like are you shitting on me? I was like no, I don't think so he listened to it and he texted back just listened all good I was like Jesus. Yeah, but it's scary

It's so crazy like you don't really even have to want to fight or get physical if you just ask a person Yeah, they'll be like oh, no, I'm sorry well enough with the public shit like I've had interactions with comics where they've beat me up or fucked with me and I remember you call me after one of them and I would much rather that beat me up you know choke me out whatever then then make it some kind of public online thing now so weird it's weird and just it's so like high school. You have a parent It's transparent that you're using this for something. Yeah, that's what bugs me

I think like don't bring me some fucking shit that you're trying to use exactly Yeah, and comic on comic is also weird cuz it's like yeah, even if you want to go public all right I said something that's offensive is like you've said stuff. That's offensive. You just just didn't say it publicly. Like I know you have, you're a comic, right? We've been going around, comic, you say offensive jokes that if it got out, it'd be a problem for you. Right, and then you wanna start sending them, here's another offensive thing a comic said, do you wanna make that a thing?

Yeah. Blow that up too. At least be consistent. Yeah, there's people that get off, they get, sorry, what was that? You know, you're going. No, the people that get, like it's like they're, they get off on posting like, this person sucks in tech.

Yeah. I'm like, I've done it. I've done it with some people, not comics, but people have done it, cause I fucking hate. But you see comics do it and you're just like, you guys like know each other, don't you? It's just weird.

Yeah, it's weird. It's weird when you know each other. I'm like, you're on the same line. I'm like, it's so weird. And then it's weird, like, oh, you just pick up on the one that's snowballing That's the one you go with like I can give you eight more examples But they're like well we're going with this one for some reason When you had the thing with that guy was it was it weird to see him at the clubs or no?

Oh, yeah, oh super weird cuz I've had that too where it's like a guy I had a guy shit talking me and he hid whenever I'd be at The cell. Oh Yeah, like he ran He just knew I'd be and I didn't give a shit. I was kind of like what's up, man I'd see him and he'd be like hey and he'd be like awkward about it, but I was like I don't give a shit Well, that's you the bigger man. Yeah for you, but uh, he was shit talking me. Yeah All right. I'm not kind of person. I think that's like the New York to I'll be like what why'd you say that?

Like I just knew he was unhinged. I knew he was like a crazy guy So it's kind of like this is what he does some people are like that where you're like this person is just unhinged Yeah, I'm not even yeah some people it's not like anything. I could say would have gotten through it I'm like hey, you shouldn't have done it wouldn't have registered. Yeah. Yeah, I'll just be nice to him and make him more uncomfortable Yeah, good let him squeam it'll be squeamish but there's one guy I'm not gonna say his name but he's shit on everybody in America say his name will bleep it out yeah oh and you're not gonna say that he'd like that that's who my story was about oh really oh yeah but he's sorry about him he shit on me on a pod and somebody said to me

and I listened and I couldn't have cared less. I was just like, ah, you know. That's how I felt. Yeah, I see it. I thought it was kind of funny. And it was not weird at all. I was like, I don't care. But it, cause it's him.

You know, I'm like, he's like an ant. Like, oh, you're nobody, get out of here. Well, we cut that part out cause now he's gonna come for us. Is he still doing the thing? I, who the fuck. I went on his podcast one time. I didn't know what it was. I thought was just like you kind of shoot the shit and

Immediately as I sat down he just started going off like personal attacks on like so many comics And I was just like defending like literally people. I didn't even know I'm like well now. He's like a good person I'm like this is terrible. Ah you hear that Marin WTF Listen to our episodes. No, I'm just kidding. It's not Marin. It's a New York guy We gotta get him we gotta get Marin on here. Sure. We tried once. He never comes to New York He came for a minute and he did Don Lemon and I come on and he's like I'm leaving he did Don Lemon Yeah

Was on this week his podcast who was on was on? Oh, Ameren. Yeah. Oh, I want to hear that actually. Yeah, that should be fun. Yeah. But Don Lemon, I think, does he have a pod? I think he's kind of done. I think he has a pod or something. I think he was at like, he was at some kind of, I think he was probably at Matt Reif's show. He's at your show, dude. He went to see him at the Pekin. Oh yeah, he came to my show. Yeah, so you're a fan of yours Yeah, yeah, I saw him on the street He lives in my neighborhood and I saw him on the street and he said he was he was he had a few in him And he said what's up, and he said he likes the pod. Did he hit on you now? He's with his husband. What's the husband hot? He was a good-looking guy. He's a good-looking guy. Yeah, he's a handsome dude Yeah, Don Lamont

All right How about that? Yeah, that's him. Oh, wow. It's a tall white honky Everybody loves the whites What can you do? P diddy's uh The girl he beat up is now with married to a honky Yeah It's like a billionaire to it. Oh is he?

Yeah Like a billionaire too Oh is he? Kinda nice to date a girl who's been beat up cause you're like hey Don't act up you know what could happen Exactly I had kids and I had roommates in college And they adopted a dog that was previously Beaten by the owner and it was horrible but you never

Had to tell that dog anything twice There you go Exactly Especially if you put a towel on. Don't make me put a towel on. They're jokes, they're jokes guys. Someone's gonna be upset. Don't hit your partner. Don't hit your partner unless you're gay.

It's a fair fight. There you go. That's a what? Was that an old bit of yours? No, I think it's a Dan Bolger bit. Ah, I think it was a you bit. No, mine was, I was an old bit of yours? No, that's I think it's a Dan Bolger bit Ah, I think it was a you bit No, mine was uh, I had an old bit about two homeless people sleeping together on the street And it was like, oh man, this guy is a girlfriend and I don't

I was like, I hope he doesn't hit her because that's not domestic violence if you don't have a home That's a street fight Ah, you're right That was an old Sam bit You're right Very old Maybe it was a bullet When did you come up with a theme for this? like I'm gonna go suit and go you've changed

I like I like Nate Barghazi pushed me to do a suit. He was like, you're like a New York kid It'll be cool to rock a suit I think it's like it's a more mature special like you you're gonna drop some money on this set like make it big and I was like, okay, and so he definitely pushed me to do it and then Yeah, it just felt like a suit special. Like we kind of went like a noir type back alley. It felt like an old detective movie or something.

So I was like, all right, let's fucking, let's make it look cool. And it felt cool. I rocked the suit in Vegas before, so I was like, let me make sure this doesn't feel weird. But I was like, yeah, it felt kind of, it felt right with the material too. Yeah, well I opened for Louis 2017 where he wore a suit.. Yeah, he's the black t-shirt guy great special great special, but never again

He never did a suit again. Oh Yeah He's back. Well, maybe well. Yeah, he's back doing sets. He's back. I saw my new jokes Yeah, I thought I thought I you know, obviously you you know, the jokes are gonna be good They're gonna be the jokes, but a good theme is also nice like you know yeah I mean, that's the last thing you think of right you got to make sure the hours it is it is thing But like at the end you're like alright Let me stop being a baby like I've done the minimalist type specials before I've done the like you know

Let me let me save every penny type special But you know I they gave me money that they wanted me to spend on it looking it looks great so yeah that was that was a and you did it in the Wilbur yeah we did four shows at the will yeah that's amazing like they were all great crowds honestly like Thursday we probably got up at the 2 Friday were just way better they were just yeah they were just on another level I opened for a stave at the Wilbur for like a couple nights and I was like, oh this place is amazing. Oh, one of the best.

One of the best rooms in comedy. And you just did the other one in Boston. I did the Schubert. I did two at the Schubert and I was like, ah, I hate to leave the Wilbur, but it was great. It was great. Boston's just a fucking great comedy town. It is, yeah.

It's just hard to beat for comedy. It's like, there's something, it's like a combination of like smart and blue collar. Yes. They're like, they're kinda like witty, they're ballbusters. it's like a combination of like smart and blue collar. Yes. They're like, they're kind of like witty, they're ball busters, there's like a nice, there's something about Boston, I don't know. Yeah, cause I don't laugh Boston a bunch,

and they're great. It's great. But the acoustics are tough, it's a great club. It's a fun weekend, but it's like high ceilings and shit, you don't wanna shoot something. In a high stage, yeah, no, you obviously wouldn't shoot. But yeah, I love that, I mean, I did that club a million times, I love that club.

Yeah, they're funny in Boston, so you kinda have to step it up. Like I noticed when I do crowd work or Q&A, and their questions were funny. Yeah. And you kinda make sure like, oh shit, I gotta be funnier than you, I'm the professional. But they're funny, I did Ireland, same shit.

Similar Ireland and Boston, yeah, or they're funny as hell. Dublin? Dublin, so, such a funny crowd. They're great crowds, but the crowd work is hilarious. I got Dublin and Belfast in September, I'm pumped, man. Are you doing Vicar Street? I don't know, you'll have to tell me at the end. Come on, just pick up.

Great room. I heard it's great. That's like the cool shit when you go overseas. Oh, yeah. Folks bring you overseas, that's super cool. Have you done it yet or no? Nah, I did, I've done a couple, I went to, I just did Abu Dhabi, I did the Abu Dhabi Comedy Festival.

That was fun, that was cool as hell. I was there with Tony Woods and Will Sylvain, and Andrew Schultz, he headlined, he did the arena, and Chappelle did the arena, that was a lot of fun. And I've done London, and I've done, London's great. I went to Kenya, I did the arena and she did the arena. That was a lot of fun And I've done London and I've done London's great after I went to Kenya. I did it Was that great? Yeah, that was really cool. Yeah, that was a lot of fun. That's great When you go international and the joke everyone's like, oh after you do one you're like, oh, yeah, the jokes just you know We'll get it. Yeah, you'll get it. What about it? You did Israel. I did Israel too. Wow

Yeah, we believe that out. No That was great. That was great. I did seven cities there It was whoa, it was great like like especially when you're not like when you're something different You just make fun of the thing whatever it is right the outcast just making fun of the thing It's just like it was amazing. Yeah, I did Berlin. He just all Holocaust. Yeah, they ate it up. Yeah, they love it Yeah, I did Berlin. He just all Holocaust. Yeah, they ate it up. Yeah, they love it Elephant in the room you got to do it Israel. I'm sure Palestine Netanyahu yeah, well they told you not to talk about that, but but it was like a lot of like New York Jewish transplants

So it was great. I mean they just got everything they just got all the things you're talking about you guys working on any bits Oh, I don't have have good shit We did it mark, and I've been doing it like off the pod lately. Uh-huh So we like I feel like it's like non-natural I can check if I have anything. Yeah, sure. I got nothing I got nothing. Ah, you might have set us up. I have nothing but it may be something like it's nothing theoretically All right, that's what we're doing here. Yeah Alright, that's what we're doing here. Yeah, yeah. Um, well, I want to, again, it's just like a story I have where I don't know how to, I don't know the angle into it, but I want to, uh, I have a bit that I'm working on where I'm talking about like, I'm now like, I'm about to be in my mid thirties, and I'm at

the point where I want all of my friends to be married. I don't want them to be single because I'm single and my single friends still expect me to be their wingman. As you get older, becoming a wingman is harder because your lies get bigger. When you're young, you just lie like, you know, yeah, like he's a good cook. When you're older, you gotta be like, yeah, he's a good father. So that's basically the angle now and then I want to tell a story about Like times where I've seen what like when you you ever seen a wingman like half to wingman, but he get into a fight With the girl he's supposed to like

Take like a wingman versus a cock blocker like when they get into it like in a thing Right. I have a story where that happened, where they almost ended up fighting. Where like a boy of mine was supposed to like be a wingman. And they almost got into like a fist fight with like the girl. And I'm like, this is so the opposite, but I just don't know the angle to get it.

Yeah, you have to pause and be like, all right, he's not a good father. Or something like that, yeah. Maybe there's something too, he's such a bad wingman that you look great. Like he's fighting with this girl, and she's like fuck this guy. I'll talk to you. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, well, maybe that's good Yeah, he's so like violent. Yeah. Yeah, like I would never hit a woman. She's like I'll take you I had a friend. I had a friend's dad who passed away who was like that growing up I remember we were in a bar and he like to get the bars we were underage he was like the fun dad oh yeah

shocker he's not with us anymore but he was he was hilarious he was like he would get us drunk we went to a bar once and he just walks up to this like hot we were kids were probably like 20 walked up to this hot fucking woman in the bar and he goes lady what I would give to fuck you up the ass Jesus Christ what is he doing? and we were like what the hell and I'm like miss I'm so sorry and he goes, lady what I would give to fuck you up the ass. Jesus Christ, what is he doing? And we were like what the hell? And I'm like, man, I'm so sorry. And she goes, well finally, a gentleman. I was like, I guess we're using that word loosely now.

But I ended up getting blown by her. Really? Yeah, we were talking and he's like, give me a thumbs up. I'm like, he knew what he was doing. Yeah, well I think that's the bit. Something like that, like the shitty wingman. Yeah, cause I get I think that's the bit Like that like the bet the shitty wingman yeah Cuz I cuz I had a similar story where the guy

Where like a friend of mine was like like he was something like he said something along the lines like I'd love to like have Unprotected sex with you like I wouldn't use a condom with like first line And she was like what the fuck and wow and then you're just sitting there like I'd use a condom with you like what the fuck? And then you're just sitting there like, I'd use a condom with you. I'd. That's funny. There we go.

That's what I had. Finally, a gentleman. And I take you to dinner first, oh my god, who is this guy? Yeah, all right, that's not bad. We got something. I got nothing, dude. There's so many bad people,

like when I was on Tinder and all that, there's so many bad, like shitty, boring guys, and if you were like somewhat funny or anything, you'd get laid. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So yeah, you just, you got something there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, so yeah, just you got something there just the He's so bad. You're good. Yeah, you know what I found I remember you told me this like a while ago when I was like still open if you you said that like I think you

Said you had a conversation with burr that he was like he told you something along the lines like when you go to stories Like the people kind of just fuck with you a little more mmM Yeah, I've I've like found that like with this new hour that I'm doing I've kind of went more to like telling like I'm not gonna tell long drone our stories like a quick punchy stories but like there are a lot of stories and it just feels like the connection yes is tighter like somebody about a story really like people into you yeah they remember this story the bit I get like referenced the most is like the white the white really like yeah

Yeah That's what people fuck people like of stories In a weird way when you put yourself in the audience shoes because sometimes I'll do that like I just did the cleave I did the Cleveland funny bone and Costa was at hilarity so after I went to watch costa just to be like let me just be an audience member and see Like an hour. I love hilarity. Yeah, and the hilarity is fucking amazing great club But you you kind of you kind kinda see where you're like, oh yeah, even though you came to laugh,

like a good story that has laughs and is really interesting, that's like great. I know. It's like better, in a way. It's better, and it rings you in, you're on the edge of your seat, there's a big ending. It's like a movie. Yes.

You're like a movie that's funny and has all the things. In the moment, yeah. Yeah, it's great. People relate it to their lives. Yeah. Oh, I've had a similar thing's funny and like has all the moment. Yeah, you're related to their lives Yeah, oh, I've had a similar thing and yeah, they feel more connected right? Yeah Nah, I don't have any I got nothing good right yeah Oh my shit's either like long or just fucking it's either there or nothing I have like nothing in between we had a session the other night though. We've been in the wild

I got a lot out of that same same All right, I got one tell me if I've done this before. The pizza bit? So I was hanging out with my buddy and I was like, you wanna get dinner? And he's like, yeah, sure. And I go, you wanna get pizza? And he goes, I had pizza last night.

I'm like, yeah, but you love pizza. And he's like, I know, but I don't eat it every night. And I said, well, don't get married. Cause that's what marriage is, you know? And I'm like like when you get married You eat pizza every night, but you got to make it interesting. You're like tonight. I'll eat it from behind Maybe I'll pay a guy to eat my pizza and I'll watch Then you got a couple you got a couple

And have you done it I've tried it, but it's it's shaky yeah, and I'm like look I get it from her angle, too She's got to fuck this this thin crush. She probably wants a deep dish So I hit it. That's good. That's new that I just funny. Okay. I'll try it It felt to a to be like it felt a little too like comparison Analogy something about a delivery, but maybe when you're working a delivery boy. Oh, yeah, you know we're like watching people make pizza like network porn Then cross deep dish that's a big it's also tough cuz I'm in New York, and there's just so much great pizza I know oh, that's tell me about it. Yeah Yeah, that's true. Yeah, all right all right. I'll try it tonight. Yeah, we'll see what happens

I think I think you got something the bad wingman that bad when they're, all right, I'll try it tonight. We'll see what happens. I think you got some on the bad wingman. The bad wingman? Good, all right, I'll work on it. Is this something, I don't know if I've told, might have told you this, I don't remember, but like, I have a thing about like, as an adult, like when you're young, every drug you take, you're trying to extend the night,

and then you get older, and every drug is like, whatever will make it tomorrow. Yeah. That's good. You know you know what I mean like I don't want it to be full of my whole thing is full of drugs that don't get me till Tomorrow exactly I have like little like powders Yeah, this will knock me out and be in like I don't do anything that one like extending the night is like a sign of hope It isn't the bit. I'm just talking about it's like a sign of hope That's why like when you're an adult in like your 30s ors doing coke, I'm like, what the fuck are you doing? Yeah. You know, I don't need more ideas

I'm not gonna follow through on. Right. Yeah, coke versus melatonin is very real. Yeah. Or coke versus Ambien. This is how little I party at this point. I mean, I drink, but this is how little I party. There's a line I did in a bit,

I still drink, but now it's like a scotch during a Hitler doc. I'm not going out, you know? But like, you know, I'll take melatonin. I'll be like don't take that shit. I'll give you bad dreams Like that's how little I fucking party. That's look I stopped taking it because of the nightmares. That's why exactly Nightmares. Yeah, not just vivid dreams like scary dream. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, huh, it can be weird like I knew I was a dreaming but it was weird. It's weird especially if you're sleeping next to somebody. Yeah. It's weird. I didn't know. I started doing the edibles. Really?

Yeah. Whoa. But there's something to that I think of like spending the night and like it needs more but there's something about like young people you like you make I think the other thing is like, one of the reasons I don't do coke is like, I don't wanna be more aware of my decisions. Like young people, it's like 2 a.m. you're doing blow and shit. 4 a.m. it's like, I don't wanna hide an awareness

for whatever bad shit I'm about to do. Sure. You know? Yeah, yeah. I don't know, I'll play with that. Adderall. Adderall, that's true. Adderall's adult cocaine. Yeah, cuz you do it during the day There's some I'll play with it. Yeah

I got spots tonight. I'll get I'll see you guys the seller tonight. Yeah, I'll be there. Yeah. Yeah, I'm doing I think yeah, I think there's I think that's I think that could be big something there What are you gonna be coming up? You got any road gigs? Can you have an HBO thing? Yeah, well I had it two years ago. Ah, they had a new one No, I joke world was talking about you whose joke world, you know on YouTube. Oh really? When you can record a new one you think probably this fall? Oh, all right your comedy fest by nice Do you have an idea where you're gonna shoot it probably? Gramercy, that's cool. Let's talk about it. Okay. Let's talk. Yeah. Yeah Well, what I'm a she's cool, but I mean I feel like a lot of people show every mercy

Yeah, I wanted Sony Hall, but everyone is four or five special shot there this year. Oh, yeah Oh Keith everyone right Brad Williams, Jessica Brad Williams Michelle Butoh, dang don't do it there I know although you can make anything you can make anything yours. can make anything yours. Yeah, make anything yours. Oh nice I love zanies. Yeah, I'm doing zanies. When does this come out? Oh Over there you go to Chicago the 21st. Yes, sir. Where in Chicago is he? All right, I'm a zanies. It happened yesterday Yeah, no, it's next weekend. I know but when this comes out yesterday, okay So I'm at the I'm in Milwaukee August 8 through the 10th at the Milwaukee improv. Oh, no, I'm in a Elevated live August 30th to the first and I'm in New Orleans on the

Now we're doing some pop-up. Yeah, but all my all my things are on a Tampa Ian Lara love that calm Oh, yeah, I'm doing side splitters. I'm looking forward to that great room the DC improv my favorite club in the whole country Another great room never been there never worked punchline Sacramento. Yeah, I got a lot of good clubs coming up That's a great. That's a good club. That's a great improv. Yeah Yeah, I just went to CAA so hey Tell Justin I said hello. All right, is he your agent Justin? No, it's Matt He's the B guy. I'm still CAA. I mean, OK. You're doing fine.

Yeah. Rockford. Rockford, Illinois, wherever that is. Rochester, Minnesota, wherever that is. David Tellett's doing the Connecting Flights Tour, doing a one nighter in Hampton,, New Hamptons, Richmond, Virginia, Greensboro, North Carolina, Anaheim, Thousand Oaks, Redding, PA, Red Bank, New Jersey, Colorado Springs, Fort Collins, Colorado. Oh, we're doing Fort Collins, nice. St. Louis, Missouri, Atlanta, Georgia, Orlando, Florida, and Fort Lauderdale.

Come on out, say hello, and queef it up. Get a bottle of Bodega Cat cat and check us out on punch up What do you got fatty? I'm in Hammond, Indiana with Chrissy D and nemesh. We're doing a little three-person one nighter at a casino I'm in the Miami Improv August 1st through 3rd I am at the I'm gonna do another casino with those two in prior Lake, Minnesota August 10th, and then I've got mcgoobies and right outside Baltimore August 15th 17th. Yeah, and then I got The stress factory in Jersey the following weekend, and then I'm doing a nice little euro tour. We got London

We got oh, I'm terrio before that dude London, but we got Belfast Dublin, Paris, Amsterdam. Yeah Added a second show in Amsterdam, baby That first one sold out Copenhagen Oslo in Stockholm tickets still available get on that shit punch up dot live slash Samorail for tickets or just samorail.com for tickets follow us on punch up dot live slash our names Get bodega cat whiskey calm, Please watch the new special on a yes You've changed hope you change it and being a punch-up mark And I have a doc called page to stage on there that you get a 15-minute doc about mark trying to write one joke

Oh, yeah Got nothing on that pizza bit that I just did well Well, yeah, follow Ian Laurie's hilarious, follow everything he does. And uh, whatever. Oh, you hate to see that. Thank you man, I appreciate it. This is one of those podcasts that I do and I go on the road and people were like, oh, I heard you on- All right!

Good, good. Hell yeah. Love it, man. Well, thanks for listening, guys. Thank you. Comedy. Sunday's the day for my next offender. A bit of Piva Rec, you know the future's close.

I've had a little too much bourbon and Norman's talking shit about the fucking Pope and I get down in the same way. Up on the roof like a cop's coming, and naked Samuel is feeling dangerous. I'm out to lunch here in New Orleans. This woman doesn't look like I remember her, and I get down in the same way.

We might be drunk