We Might Be Drunk - Ep 214: Andrew Santino in Downtown LA

Episode Date: January 13, 2025

This was filmed on December 17th, 2024. We are saddened by the events in Los Angeles and hope that all impacted can get the help they need from these devestating wildfires.  Tonight we have the Whiskey Ginger himself, Andrew Santino, he joins the guys in Downtown LA in Sam's hotel room the day of the taping for Netflix Roast 2024. Great moments ahead, glad you chose to hang with us tonight! Support the show and sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial period at https://www.shopify.com/drunk Support the show and get 20% off your Chubbies order with promo code DRUNKS at https://www.chubbiesshorts.com/ Subscribe to We Might Be Drunk: https://bit.ly/SubscribeToWMBD WMBD Merch: https://wemightbedrunkpod.com/ WMBD Clips Page: https://bit.ly/WMBDClips Check out Andrew on the road near you: https://www.andrewsantino.com Sam Morril: YouTube Channel: @sammorril Instagram: https://instagram.com/sammorril Tickets/Tour: https://punchup.live/sammorril/tickets Mark Normand: YouTube Channel: @marknormand Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marknormand Tickets/Tour: https://punchup.live/marknormand/tickets We Might Be Drunk is produced by Gotham Production Studios https://www.gothamproductionstudios.com/ @GothamProductionStudios Producer Matt Peters: https://www.instagram.com/mrmatthewpeters #wemightbedrunk #marknormand #sammorril #podcast #drunkpodcast #comedy #comedian #funny #gothampodcast

Hey, the casting couch. Who's room is this? It's me, I'm a pig, I'm sorry. This is how you live, huh? It's how I travel. Music Okay, I gotta tell you guys something, man. Uh oh. Yeah?

Save it. This is very, um... Save it, save it. Okay. Unless it's not pod worthy. No I'm just making fun of you. Oh please. Please. Save it then. Zing. Zing. Staying here. How about that Shalamu on Theo huh? That's quite a get. What happened? He got Timmy T. Shalamu. Oh yeah Tim Shalamee. Yeah that's fucking well dude he got the president elected so you know. What's Shalamee if you got the president elected, so you know. What's chalamet if you get the president elected? Good point.

What a. Are we hugging close here? Look at my voice. Look at this, I love it. You're the only guys I know that'll stay. Is that Young MJ? Look at that. That's pretty cool.

Oh, brawny. Watch it, dude. Watch it, dude. No, his son is actually more accomplished. His son fucked Larsa Pippen. Wow, that's right. So cool to fuck your ex teammates. Your father's ex teammates ex-wife.

It's pretty dark. But didn't she, are we rolling? Yeah, we're rolling, what the hell? Didn't she jump around a lot? She jumped around. Good for her. I'm sure it's her revenge tour, because he was doing it during the playing days

and she's like, I'll get you back. I'll get you back. Take it to the hole. Good for her. Dude. Oh, nothing but net. Oh yeah. You guys are the only guys I know

that'll stay downtown Los Angeles. Well, nobody stays there. They put us here. We weren't thrilled. Who put you here? Netflix. Yeah, seems like it. That sounds like a Netflix move.

Put him in a place that no one lives and nobody goes. Yeah. CISO put us in Covina. That is too inside. Yeah, that's very inside baseball. Yeah, that's inside LA, inside baseball. Now this is a bad, I did it as a cake a while back and they put me up in a shady fucking downtown.

As a cake. You walk two feet out and you're just like, ugh. Needles, a bump. This is like, this genuinely is like, as if somebody put, if I went to New York and they're like, yeah, we got you a great place out in Long Island. That's what this is like.

Exactly. Is that bad? We just, nobody goes down here. Tim Dillon said this is the fifth time he's been downtown Los Angeles and he's lived here for years. Well, no, he comes for different reasons. He does come to Los Angeles.

There's a little walking strip for him down there, down by Staples. There's a little boys town. Did you go by Staples? Or what is it called now? Kobe Center? Crypto, crypto. Crypto. Oh, shit. I didn't even know you were talking.

I was like, what? It's right down the street. Damn. Yeah. Wow, it is. No, this is really nice. No, downtown's gotten nicer, but we still refuse to go down here. There's nothing down the street. Damn. Wow, it is. No, this is really nice. It's a, no, downtown's gotten nicer, but I still, we still refuse to go down here. There's nothing here for us. I tweeted about the show, like, come to the Netflix table

and everybody's like, downtown, are you crazy? Oh, it's happening down here? Yeah, that's why we're here, yeah. Three minutes away. Smart, smart for Netflix. Good for Netflix, dude. Good to be here, boys, the jokes were good last night. Thank you.

I love working on them. Dude, it's funny to watch you guys go through it and then have you smack each other when you're like, see, that did work. We were writing together the whole flight. But it is funny that you were like, certain jokes, see, I have no back on this. I'm like gonna fall in this window.

Can I scoot this thing over or no? Is it out of frame? Well, cause I'm like falling through this thing. Oh yeah, you got no back. Hold on. You're gonna pull an Eric Clapton's kid right out the window. Tears in Heaven?

Yes, yeah. There we go. I just had a song in the grocery store the other day. It's a depressing grocery store song. Brutal. Tears in Heaven. Depends on what you're shopping for. If you're really having a low.

We'll wait, we'll wait, hold on, sorry. I still had to move, but I had to have a back, because otherwise I'm gonna fall backwards through the. Still better than when you hear a whap at the dentist. No, I love that. That gets me ready for a teeth cleaning, too. Gotta suck that liquid. How about this, we're growing up,

where you came here at 11 a.m. I wouldn't do anything at 11 a.m. four years ago. See, I'm not the, I've always been this way. I'm not like the comic, I don't sleep in until 2 or 3 p.m. Really? I don't do it, no. I don't know why.

I get up at like 7.30 every day. Wow, what about the drinking nights? Still. Damn. You gotta get up and go, jump in the cold plunge. Do you do the plunge? I love it. Are we douchebags?

Yeah. Yeah, 100%. It's good for the organs. Dude, I'm 41 years old. I'm not trying to be cool anymore. It's I'm done. I play with my dog. I go in the cold plunge, I play with it's over the organs. I'm 41 years old. I'm not sure I'm not trying to be cool anymore It's I'm done. I play with my dog. I go in the cold plunge. I play with my dog in the morning How do you make it? So the it's set at 40 anywhere from 46 to 49. I think it's the highest It's not that bad. No for when it's 42 is my like right below right above 40 is like

That's when it gets you. Yeah, Your dick disappears. It's in my body. Dude, it's fascinating. It is. It's cool to see how small your dick can get. It's amazing. I already know. I don't need the plunge. No.

I can't handle it. If I was gonna get into a fight in this day and age, I'd wanna get into a cold plunge first. Get your dick close to your body. My dick looks like a puppy's tail. It's brutal. A little wag, like a chop tail. It's nice that your body's like,

hey, we're gonna protect your dick in this time of trauma. Your balls go way up. That's nice. It is kinda cool. It's scary when they kinda go in your body. They go in your body, yeah. It's weird. For safety, dude.

It's kinda like when your kid gets molested and he blocks it out, repressed memory. You wanna tell us something? Sure. It was 81. You weren't touched as a kid, were you? I wish I was. Come on, tell me the truth.

Nobody hugged me. No, I don't think so. I had a lot of intruders in the house. Yeah, cause you had that house that's like the house of horror. You had like a haunted house of. Completely. I think there was a guy at my house once and like walked by my bed and I pushed it out

cause I dream about that all the time. I went to your city. I was just in New Orleans. Great city. Interesting. It's got ups and downs. Tough comedy city, but great city. Tough your city, I was just in New Orleans. Great city. Interesting. It's got some ups and downs. Tough comedy city, but great city. Tough comedy city, I don't know why.

It's so weird. The music city. How'd it go, did you sell any tickets? I did a little bit, we texted, because I was like, dude, I can't sell your city for some reason, like the whole tour is sold out, and I couldn't, I did fine, I think I ended up like, that's me.

Thank you. And I don't wanna share with you. I understand. Not after what you did last night. Yeah. I think it was like 80 something, 89, 90%. Oh, that's good for New Orleans. That's huge.

Yeah, dude, it was so hard, but the crowd was great. So I was like, I don't know, I think the people that do come out really wanna see comedy. Yeah. But I think it just doesn't have it embedded in the culture. No. There's not a comedy club.

No, I know, but there's never have been. There's never has been, right? They open and close. What's the main, what's that main drag, the parade was going on there? Bourbon. No, no, no but there's never have been. There's never has been, right? They open and close. What's that main drag the parade was going on? Bourbon. No, no, no, not Bourbon Street, the bigger one. A canal? A four lane canal.

Yeah. That is like Grand Theft Auto Live, dude. That's insane. It's gross. It's wild. We went to get my Laura Peek, who opens with me. I love Peek. Dude, she's so good.

She's great in great hang. She wanted to go get some smokes, and I said, all right, let's go, so we go out, we're gonna go get lunch and get some cigarettes and I was like, dude, let's just postmate it. I don't wanna be on canal. It was chaos. It's wild.

It's zombie, daylight fentanyl slumping. Yes. And they're y'all yelling at you. See the homeless here don't yell at you. The trick is to just jog everywhere. Yeah, I'm sprinting everywhere. Cause they're not gonna mug you when you're jogging. That's true.

They're like, yeah, I don't wanna deal with that. It's not worth it. It's true. Yeah. No, it was a fun city when you're jogging. That's true. They're like, yeah, I don't wanna deal with that. It's not worth it. That's true. Yeah. No, it was a fun city, but it's also. It's wilder than New York. It's so interesting, man. Yeah.

It's just a weird, I can't figure it out. Like I can't wrap my head around what it is. What's it called, the funeral, like the cemetery? Second line? The cemetery, where they did Easy Rider, you know? Oh yeah, yeah. We passed that, I'm like, that's fucking crazy. Just a cemetery, just like above. Above ground mausoleums because of the flooding

Yeah, yeah, it'll happen again. Yeah during Katrina there were bodies floating. It's it's a voodoo Anybody anybody you knew anybody you recognize? Andrew Jackson and Paul Perdom and the emerald was in there. I think emerald legacy. He's gone. No, he's still around He will be yeah, I mean that cholesterol is coming I'll see, he's gone. No, he's still around. He will be. Yeah. I mean, that cholesterol's coming.

Bam. He's like one of the fat ones. He gotta be a fat. Well, Bobby Flay is like in great shape. Yeah, see, I don't trust a skinny chef. He's too hot. Skinny chef is a weird. Exactly.

If you're a female chef and you're skinny, fine, but if you're a fat, if you're a skinny male chef, I just, I don't know, what are you focusing on? It's not neckl actually. Pussy. Yeah, it's Bobby Flay. Bobby Flay shows like one chef and one young actress, he's fucking to the judges. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't like it. His daughter is like a famous something, somebody told me. I don't know if she's a chef or something, but she's famous something, and she's apparently good looking. So she's next to the chef. He's a hunk.

What is that? His wife was the hot lady from Law and Order, right? Oh, that's right. That's a hunk. Well, he is, his wife was the hot lady from Law and Order, right? Oh, that's right. Where's Gaharkate? No, no, no, no, no, no. The blonde one. The DA.

He wasn't pulling detective, Poon. He was pulling DA, Poon. Entry, entry level. He's on the body. You gotta move up. Dude, boys, how's the bodega cat? Hey, we're cooking. We're in the store now, the factory, the other one.

We finished the bottle in my studio. Yeah, I know why I said, all right, it's moving for sure. Like Laugh Factory, Improv, and Comedy Store are all gonna come on the cocktail list. Seriously? Yeah. That's great, man. That is fantastic. No, I think it's funny because it's like starting a brand,

starting your own is so tough. And I know Bert and Tom tried to, they're doing vodka, I think. Yeah. Yeah, it's tough. We appreciate it. I mean, Bert even said, he's like, we don't wanna step on you guys with the whiskey, so we're doing vodka, which, you know.

Come on, that's very nice. Vodka's tough, I have zero interest in vodka. Oh, I like a vodka. You do? I like a martini, but then, but the real martini people will tell you, you're fooling yourself, it's not a martini with vodka, it's only a martini with gin.

Yeah. Vodka's better. Well, I'd say vodka's an alcoholic's drink. Ain't that the truth. Yeah, it's fake. It takes on the taste of whatever you put it with, so it's a fake drink. Oh, interesting.

I think liquor has to be, it has to be flavored and cultured enough on its own that you should be able to enjoy it on its own, if it's good liquor. No personality. Right, vodka's boring. Yeah. Vodka's a skinny female chef.

Wow. Oh, that's good. Nothing there. There's nothing there. Wow. Yeah, skinny chef, it's like a stable stripper. I don't like it. Right, what are we talking about? Yeah, I need some trauma There's nothing there. Wow. Skinny chef, it's like a stable stripper. I don't like it. Right, what are we talking about, dude?

I need some trauma, I need some mental illness. It's like a hookah that chats too much. Shh, get the business. Yeah, vodka, vodka just goes with whatever it's with, which I never, even like in high school, when people go get like a bottle of vodka to put with like a mixer, I was always like, not interested, just go get me some dark stuff. It's a little amateur, but the hangover's better. For vodka? Yeah with like a mixer. I was always like, not interested. Just go get me some dark stuff.

It's a little amateur, but the hangover's better. For vodka? Yeah, clear is better. If you're drinking good vodka, not if you're drinking pop off or some shit. I'll have me some pop off though. That's good dirty boy stuff. That's when you want to disappear into the night

and the moon comes up and goes, let's go to bed, dude. By the way, Chatty Hooker, they should have the Uber thing where they go, do you want a conversation or no? That should be a pre-rec. And what did it say on the Uber now that it says, you know how they tell you that they're deaf or whatever like this?

Yes, I love deaf drivers. Me too, well they're not, I've had three of them and they're not. Deaf or foreign. You should be able to request deaf or foreign. Yes. Well you notice this now is like the driver that drove me here, isn't a super nice guy.

And I'm on the phone talking to a friend about getting a real ID. You know, like a, you have to have now like your driver's license, and there's what's called a real ID here in California to be able to travel. Everyone has to have a real ID. Or you have to use a passport.

Do you know what this is? He's nodded. Yeah, you have to have a real ID at some point. They won't let you travel with your driver's license. What? What's the difference? In May of this year. Weird. It's just a, it's just government verified. It's in May of this year. That's 25. Weird.

It's just government verified, it's more money for the government. It's just another branch they created to get more money. I do the digital face at the airport now, it's pretty great. I couldn't give it up, dude. I know, I'm so lazy. Are you one of those?

I can't do the digital face at the airport. Why? I don't know, something about it freaks me out. Well, they got your retina now. The clear. I do the clear, the digital, and the pre. I stopped doing the clear because that's a scam. The TSA is just as quick as the clear. Sometimes it's longer. You know, certain digital, and the pre. I stop doing the clear because that's a scam. The TSA is just as quick, is it clear?

Sometimes it's longer. It's certain airports, you never know. I just, I can't do it, but she was talking about the getting the real ID or whatever, and then I'm like, what's the difference? And then the driver turns around and shows me, he's like, this is real ID, has a California bear on the top right corner.

He's like talking while he's driving. He's listening to my whole conversation. Oh, should've gotten the deaf guy. I know. Don't get the idea. We had that last night. Mark and I were going through the set and we were literally going back and forth

and this guy keeps going, what's going on with the cops? We're like, why would we know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. How's that our thing? I know, we're trying to go over jokes. Yeah, leave me alone. It's like we're the WNBA. You guys did great last night, though.

That Netflix thing is gonna be fun. I hope so. It's gonna be good because you guys are in it. Thanks, we'll see. Yeah, no, it will be. It's got to be. It's not live, cause you guys are in it. Thanks, we'll see. Yeah, no it will be. It's not live, is it live? Live crowd taped edited. We were nervous cause we pushed

Dane Cook set back too, and we're like, we don't wanna be the New York guys doing that shit. It was eight minutes. I know, but we've never met him either, so after the set we gave the, hey man, how are, you know, we tried to charm him a little bit.

He was fine, I mean, I was fine. I don't really care, he doesn't care about that stuff. He was very nice, but, how are you know we try to charm him a little bit. He was fine He didn't care. I mean, I don't care. He doesn't care about it. He was very nice, but we just you know Don't we all know by now though? Companies never on time ain't that the truth especially in LA. Yeah, it's like it's never on time Yeah, well the seller sometimes if I'm in New York for a while and they send me those like sets and like man These are so close to each other, but then you're like, it's not it's never gonna happen on time 20 minutes add an extra 25 We did a chocolate sundae Speaking of late dude, we did laugh factory but then you're like, it's never gonna happen on time. 20 minutes, add an extra 25 every time. 100%, it's never on time. We did a... Chocolate Sundays, speaking of late.

Oh my God, speaking of late. Dude, we did Laugh Factory. I hope we can find the footage of us running the roast at Laugh Factory and D. Ray Davis' show last night. It was bad. Talk about fucking bombing. At Chocolate Sundays? We were just bombing.

D. Ray's show at Improv. Oh, what's that one called? It's gotta have a fun name. It doesn't. I think it was called Sickle Cell. I can't remember, it was something crazy. Glaucoma Presents. It was called You Should Not Have Said That.

Yeah. They hate it. Dude, we got off, what was the line the guy, last night, what did the guy say, D, when we were getting off stage? This is the worst fucking part. So we had a rough bomb and I'm walking off stage and this black guy's with his wife and he goes,

dude, dude, you're in a show, right? You're in a show. And I jokingly said,'s with his wife and he goes, dude, dude, you're in a show, right? You're in a show. And I jokingly said to catch a predator, he goes, that's it. That's how bad a set it was. He was like, this guy's only work. Yeah. Dude, I love when a black dude would recognize me

but not know where I'm from. Like I was on a plane and he was standing, you know, I'm sitting down and I'm looking on my phone and he's in line boarding the plane. And he goes, yo, hey yo. And then I looked up and he goes, you that dude from that, yo, you that dude, right? And I was like, oh hey man, you know what I'm trying to,

cause it's, you know what I mean, like it's a quiet, I'm like yeah, and it's like 10.30 in the morning. And then he goes, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, bro, bro. And he turns and his buddy is in the, still in the, what is that called, the, you know, the, The jetway. The jetway, yeah, he's still on the jet turns and his buddy is in the, still in the, what is that called? The, you know, the. The jetway. The jetway.

Yeah, he's still on the jet bridge. And he turns into the jet bridge and goes, hey yo, is that dude from the, oh, what's up, come on man, come here. And his boy like looks up and he goes, yo, that is that dude. And I was like, oh my, but it made me feel good. Was it a Lil Dicky show, you think?

Probably, yeah, 100%. Yeah. That's gotta be it. Yeah, he doesn't know me from anything else. That show's huge. It was. You're great on that show. You can act, man. It was all right, it was fun.

It's over now. Wait, this is funny, this reminds me of when I first moved to LA, at the Improv, it used to be called Mo'Beta Mondays. I think that was D-Ray's old show. I don't know who did it. That might have been it. But it was Mo'Beta Mondays,

and I was like 23 or 22 years old, and when you're first in the club scene You'd like don't know how to you know, you're like I'm a comedian Yeah, okay, if I just hang out somewhere sure and the door guys are like the fuck out of here Like they don't want you know, they don't care. Yeah, and the guy was like, yeah You could just go sit by the bar and I was like, okay and he's like get in line over here first And I was like, oh what what is this? He's like you got to go through the metal detector. And I went through the metal detector,

they made me take off on my pockets. I was like, I've never seen this before. And I sit at the bar and Eddie, who's not there anymore, a bartender, one of the best dudes, I said to him, I go, excuse me, why is there a metal detector? And he's making drinks. He goes, it's Mo'Beta Mondays.

And it slipped on me and I was like, what do you mean? He goes, it's Mo'Beta Mondays. And then walked away. I was like, right do you mean? He goes, it's Mobyta Mondays. And then walked away. I was like, right, okay, right on. Right on, dude. We had a similar thing. We walked in, the guy goes, it's gonna be late. Like you're gonna be here a while.

We got a message. And we got a message. It's usually late. It's late, yeah. Usually it's never late. It's usually. It's very late, yeah. It's a cultural thing.

Oh dude, how about Laugh Factory? Our friend, Matt Herman, who runs Bodega Cat, is in the back and he just overhears two black guys go to his girlfriend, I hear these guys are racist. Where, what the fuck is that even mean? I wasn't at that show, what are they talking about? That's my thing, that's my thing. That's an insane thing to say.

Yeah, yeah. I hear these guys are racist. Well you're at Laugh Factory, you should've pulled a Kramer. Do the thing, throwback. We thought about it. Throwback dude. You'd have betterramer. Do the thing, throw back. We thought about it. Throw back, dude. You had a better set. He did better than we did.

Yeah. That video's still embedded into everybody's brain. Forever a piece of cultural history. Yeah. Was that the first viral video? It was the first cell phone thing. It was the first like, you know how now everyone's got a video of someone doing something wild

and you can't believe they caught it on camera? That was the first, how did you catch that on camera? Totally. How did that even get on? No one was recording at shows back then. I guess a guy whipped out a Nokia or something. I know. Some guy was playing Snake and was like,

hold on one second, I gotta get this on camera. That's still to this day, we watch it, me and a couple of buddies will send it to each other like once a year, just to re, it's just so funny. It's brutal. It's so funny, it's insane. That guy from the sitcom saying that shit, it was a crazy.

To watch a man collapse though, it was kind of beautiful on stage. And we've all been there. Yeah, well not there. Ah! Mark. Got destroyed by a Motorola Razor. Yeah.

It's a throwback. Then Tosh had that similar thing, that was kind of around that too. He had the rape joke. Yeah. Oh yeah, but that was, but again, this is like embedded in his comedy set. That's true.

Doesn't matter. And a workout show and Tosh had the chops. It was different. Of course. But that doesn't matter to him anyway. That's like a, what does he give a shit? A joke on a ride is meaningless. No, that's nothing.

Especially nowadays too. We're all throwing so much stuff out there now. Geez, I know. That it just doesn't really land. They devour the content. It's like you can't fill that hole. Yeah, but I think it's gonna change. Something's coming.

I said that to a friend the other day. I was like, something's changing, I think. I think that- Yeah, there's a fatigue. Yeah, I think people are just tired of like a billion clips and a billion crowd work clips. And I think people have seen so much now that they're checked out. I don't know what the next revolution will be, but.

I think longer, like these guys, Josh Johnson types are doing like 25 minutes. Shows have come back. Dude, we gotta ask you something actually, cause Mark met Larry, David. Had a so-so interaction. I had a quick one, it was pretty good. You were on Curb.

I did an episode of Curb, yeah. I did an episode of Curb, yeah. I did one episode of Curb, but it was amazing for me. It was like, I was teed up to win. Yeah, Mocha Joe's episode. I was teed up to win pretty hard, I will be honest. Like I went in there, you know, with so much ammunition because the casting director is the first, is the person that put me in my very first thing too.

She supported me a lot in my career. So she was great. She was like, this is for you to lose. All you have to do is go in and be yourself. Like don't screw yourself. And I knew her. In the room was Larry, one of the writers, the casting director.

And then at the time her associate, I don't even know what to call him, but he's now at Netflix, which is great. He's now moved on too. But so it was a room full of people that's like, I'm bound to win, because it's just Larry's the only guy I'm trying to impress.

And this is the audition. Yeah, this is the audition. And they give you a character breakdown, and there's no scene. They just tell you what the details of the character are. So this one was, I actually originally auditioned for the guy whose dog was Adolf. Did you remember that?

His dog's name was Adolf and you know, and they're like, that's a particular, that's an interesting name. So I auditioned for that and I played it up and then Larry was kind of- Is that when he says, hail Hitler to the dog? Yeah, exactly, yeah, so good. So I played it up a little bit as the character

and did like a little bit of a German accent for him. And he liked it, I could tell. Like I could tell he was interested. And then she's like, takes me in the hallway and she goes, give it a second. She goes, talks to Larry. She comes back out and she's like, Larry says that you don't look like one of these Aryan.

You're a redhead. Like you don't look like this Aryan German. It's like, it's not gonna work. You don't fit the look. And I was like, fuck, all right. So I was ready to get in my car and she's like, no, no, hold on, hold on, hold on one second. She went back in, they talked for another three minutes.

She comes back out and she's like, he wants you to do this other one. Will you try this other one? Whatever, fucking fine. So she hands me the paper. I went out into the hallway. They took one more audition. And then I was like, I'm ready, I can go now.

She's like, you don't want any more time to prepare? And I was like, no, no, no, I'll do this. So it was the guy that invented the P-Cube, the urinal where the door shuts. Yes. And I went in the room and I said, I think off the bat I did the bit, Larry and I were just improving.

And I did the bit where I was like, yeah, depending on your penis size, the door automatically sensors how big or small your cock is and that depends on how the urinal shifts up and down and it'll go, do, do, do, small penis detected and it'll move down and Larry started chuckling a little bit and so I just went in harder on this bit of like, I was like, oh and then, not only recognize

the length of your penis but the girth may matter. So I just kept going on and then he broke like two times maybe, like just laughing out loud. And then halfway through he was like, get out of here, get the fuck, get out of here, get the fuck out of here. Damn, that's amazing. It was great, he was laughing and he was like,

get the fuck out of here, get out of here, you're good, get out of here. Oh, that's incredible. So cool. I called my wife on the way home and I was like, look dude, I've done hundreds of auditions. I was like, there's no way that I didn't get that. Cause it was so fun.

I was like, they'll throw me in something. Yeah, yeah. Cause he was having a good time. It was like, even if they put me in the background as like a one line, I didn't care. Yeah. And then they called me later that day and they were like, yeah, Larry wants you to do that bit.

So it was great. And on the day it was a joke for me because JB walked, he came on set and saw me and was like, oh, set me up. And so then it made me feel comfortable and he wasn't even in the scene. He put himself in the scene. Whoa. Larry, and Larry you could tell was like,

just get out for this one. Just get out. Their relationship is so exactly the show. It's great. That's amazing. He's like, come on, come on, get out, please get out. And JB wanted to keep inserting. So he just kind of got in the scene and it made it even better.

And then Jeff was there. So it was like, he knew me from stand up. It just felt comfortable. So I didn't have the fear, but in the morning I was tripped out. I was like, fuck dude, am I gotta be so good in front of Larry? And there's no script.

No, and I was just nervous because you don't want to over improv with him. I was like, I don't want him to be like, stop it. I don't want that. Right. Of him being like, dude, calm down. You're doing way too much. So in the morning I was nervous as shit. But then once I got there and saw JB, I was like,

we're good. Yeah, that's incredible. It just broke me open. Then I didn't care and Larry was really playful and such a rad dude. I don't know if he had a bad experience, dude, but he's the man. I did a self tape and it says in the notes,

don't try to be funny. Which is the hardest note. Not saying we can't not be funny, but you're like, well how do I do it? Do I do it straight? Do I do it like English patient? They want you to be straight because he's the funny guy.

I mean they want you to- Yeah, but you were funny. You were funny. It's funny playing it straight. That's what the scene is funny. Right, the scene is very funny. They wanted me to be dead serious about the bit. He was like, take it serious, it's your job.

Got it. He kept saying that too on the day. He was like, this is your job. He's like, you are a, so I was a little like, he was like, well, why can't we do that? And I would have to have lines and moments where I'm like, well, that's illogical, dude. So I don't know if you know how to build toilets

because you don't and I do. So do you want me to do my job or not? And that makes Larry get into his second, which inherently is gonna be funny. So they don't want you to try to like get a zinger, but they want you to like layer in enough real world comedy where it's, you know, you're giving him the, that you know, you're giving him the like, what the fuck?

That's what he wants. So if you can give him those layups,, you're giving him the like, what the fuck? Yeah, yeah. That's what he wants. So if you can give him those layups, then he wins. He wants pushback. Yeah, he wants like an annoyance, he wants conflict in every single scene. Yeah. And that's the best part about that guy.

That's why his comedy is, it's so simple and yet so particular. Yes. It's a simple scene, but it's extremely dynamic because you're like, this would annoy anybody, and I see why this pisses him off. Right. And then he's gonna take it out on other characters's extremely dynamic because you're like, this would annoy anybody and I see why this pisses him off. And then he's gonna take it out on other characters and they're gonna be like, what is your fucking problem?

Yes, exactly. He's not wrong, that's the best part about all that. I know, I completely agree. But he was the man, dude, I, you know. That was like the, I got paid, you know, like a daily rate. We get like no money to do those. Like it's literally like a minimum. And those are ones where I'm like, I'll pay you.

Yeah, totally. I would have 100% pay them to be on that show. I said the same thing to FX about- Well, let's edit this out because we're already heading this way in show business. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, I know. Well, I said the same thing to FX back in the day about baskets.

I said, I'll pay, I was like, I'll drive to Bakersfield and I'll pay to be up there, I'll pay for my hotel. I wanted to be on the show. Is Curb the coolest guest spot you did it with? By far. What else was really cool? Arrested was awesome. Whoa.

Just me and Bateman had a scene together, which was great. I forgot about that. Yeah, it was pretty cool. That was a cool moment. Super nervous for that too, cause Jason's, you know, he's really good. Man, he got a resume. Really smart and quiet.

Yeah, he's, that was, those are by far the coolest ones. I mean, yeah. Arrested in Curb probably. Curb for me is it, that was all I wanted. I wanted to do Curb once before they stopped. Of course. And now they're done. You audition?

Oh, it's self tape. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You gotta be in front of him. I know, and it was Josh Rodninski, though remember him, he got Young Larry. Oh yeah, John Rodninski, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He played Young Larry? Yeah. He was good, he's a good actor. Should yeah, yeah, yeah. He played Young Larry? Yeah.

I like that. He was good, he's a good actor. Should've been you, man. And then he dated his daughter. Zing! Oh yeah. They just broke up. Sorry, Josh.

John. John. John Shack. Josh is even better, sorry, Josh. Sorry, Josh. He looks like a Josh. He's Jewish. But yeah, cute kid.

Come on, dude, you look Jewish. Yeah, I'll take it. You are, you kid. Come on, dude, you look Jewish. Yeah, I'll take it. You are, you are. Honestly, it's enough of this mask. Just say you're Jewish, why does this lie? He's appropriating our culture a bit. Yeah, it's getting worse and worse over time. Maybe I'll take a hawk to a quiz.

She just found out she was 97% Ashkenaz. Seriously? Yeah. Oh, that doesn't help the industry plant part of this whole thing, does it? Oh, and the- That just gives conspiracy theorists more firepower. And the stealing money. Right.

Yeah, of course she goes down for a pyramid scheme, pump and dump, whatever it was. Right, right, right. God damn it. That hock to it was phlegm after all. All right. I can't believe people bid on that too, on her Bitcoin thing.

I have people who don't. You guys don't have any of that shit. Crypto? I have a little, I just bought it when it got big. I think I missed the boat on that., on her Bitcoin thing. I have people who don't. You guys don't have any of that shit, crypto? I have a little, I just bought it when it got big. I've never done it. I think I missed the boat on that. Me too. And I also, I don't like shit I don't understand,

but I remember doing meetings with people, they were like, just do one meeting with us, it'd be finance bros in those pullover sweaters being like, NFTs of your jokes. And I'm like, you want me to sell AIDS joke for 7K, dude? Yeah. You know, like, what kind of connoisseur?

Get Mark Scarelli on there with you to boost the price. What kind of grifter do you feel like? I'm like, I'm not gonna do this shit, but they were like, you really, you can donate it to charity. I'm like, oh, these guys are like thieves. I can like feel this energy. Anybody in the financial sector's a thief, dude.

These guys are all taking your money to make more money, and then they give you a little bit of money, and you think, this is pretty good. It's like, yeah dude, they're making real money. Exactly. You're the joke. You're the pawn, so they can just take your money to go play with it.

But the NFT is still a thing. I remember they did like Pop Shot, or whatever it's called, Top Shot. Remember for the basketball cards, you own like a sequence? Right. You own like a dunk? What?

It's the dumbest thing ever. Yeah, it's so dumb. And the vagueness of that is why they're getting away with it because no one's really paying attention. Exactly. You really don't know the ins and outs. I didn't get in it because I was like, I just don't. And there's no story.

Like at least with an artist, you're like, this is Van Gogh's journey. This is why this art means something. This is Francis Bacon's journey. This is like, this is, This is what- That's tangible. This person was influenced by this. It's just a fucking thing. I know, it's not even a thing, this person was influenced by this. It's just a fucking thing.

This is an Instagram real. Yeah, it's a virtual thing. It's great now that, you know, like for years, people were like, you can't touch it, the NFTs, so it's not real, and now that people are hating on AI, makes it even less valuable, which I think is good, because everybody hates AI now. Like all these digital and graphic artists,

they're so mad AI is becoming like a real thing. It's true. So they're fighting back. So if you own AI, it's gonna make people even more disinterested in it, because it's like, well, it's not, it's already a shitty part of our culture. You're just ripping away art from artists,

so then there's not gonna be any validity to it, because no one will wanna invest in it. It's only worth it if somebody buys it. And there's a swing back. Now baseball cars are huge again. Are they? They're huge. I gotta call my mom.

Only the really big ones. Don't throw those away. Yes, exactly. Well do you see the, we saw this the other night, the food delivery from just a robot out here. Oh yeah, we have those all over the place now. Those are fucking weird. Yeah, I've never gotten one

but I see them all over West Hollywood, they're big. Yes. Not big by me, I'm out in all over. West Hollywood, they're big. Yes. Not big by me, I'm out in the suburbs. You don't see any of that. It feels like we're in Blade Runner or something. It's sketchy as hell. It's kinda cool though, huh? It's kinda, take nine hours.

I see it just trekking along, it's so slow. Yeah, well the food's always cold anyway. See? It's always gonna be cold. It's never gonna, even if it comes in a guy's car, he delivered seven other meals, your food's gonna be cold. Yeah, and also you just wanna push it over,

there's probably like a chicken parm in there, you know? A hobo should be all over there, yeah. Open that up, yeah. That's right. Pick that thing. You'd be a good homeless guy, you'd figure it out fast. I can't wait. You'd figure it out so fast.

It's coming. No, it's not, dude, you're so far away from that. What do you mean? You just, didn't you just get a new place? You just did. I did. Yeah. It's a really cool spot. Four floors of horrors, Brownstone and BK, baby. You're in Brooklyn?

Yeah. Wait, I thought you were in the city. No. I was right in Greenwich Village, but I wanted the room. I got a backyard now. I got a parking space. Upgrade, upgrade, upgrade. The kids are trick or treating on my block.

I mean, it's a cheat code. I'm in New York, but I'm not. Yeah, that's, Brooklyn's great. Good for you. You're still in the, yeah, you're in the heart. I'm still in the heart. I know. I was in your building without your knowledge.

I know, I wish you were. It was fantastic, I was snooping around. Yeah. What a rooftop. That's a good one. What a rooftop this guy's got. You gotta come on next time you're in the heart. Yeah, you're in the heart, I know. I'm in the heart. I was in your building without your knowledge. I know, I wish you were. I was snooping around. Yeah. What a rooftop. That's a good one. What a rooftop this guy's got. You gotta come on, next time you're in the city. Yeah, he's got a terrace, he's got a sauna.

He's got a big movie theater. I'm looking city life, but it doesn't feel like the city. I love it. Right, right, right. Yeah, no, that does feel different. It's not like, well, you're not slumming it anymore. No, we've been. And you don't have to, man.

You boys deserve it. It's good to see people on the come up. But the fall is coming. It's coming. We'll see on the way down. Yeah, the fall is coming. We'll be living in a studio apartment together in the East Village in a couple years.

Can't wait. We'll be sharing. Those are some good years. You know, fucking a fat chick on air matches while your friend waits in the bathroom. Tuesday, baby. Oh yeah. Didn't love being that friend, but you know.

Nah, dude, I always say to young people when they all want to get their own place, I'm like, dude, go as long as you can living with friends, because it's fun, it's cheaper, you'll never have that experience. Once that experience is gone and you live alone, you don't ever get that. Make sure the friends you like living with, though. Well, at some point you're gonna hate it anyway,

but it's at least like, it's worth the camaraderie of coming home and seeing what people are up to. Yes. Cause you're like, what do you guys get into? Yeah, it keeps you out. I liked having a shitty place for a while because I would just stay out and do sets all night. Yeah.

Cause I didn't want to go home. I didn't mind being on the road 50 weeks a year. Yeah, cause you know, home stinks anyway. Yeah. I agree, there was a dude on the internet, one of these, I see him a lot pop up with the glasses, bald dude, he's like a life coach type of person, no, I agree. There was a dude on the internet, one of these, I see him a lot pop up with the glasses, bald dude. He's like a life coach type of person, whatever,

but he's not like young buff hot life coach. He's not like, get your fucking shit together. He's not like that. He just gives like really cool pieces of wisdom, and the one thing he said is like, I say this to every young person is, do not be at home. Be at home for bed, and that's it. He's like, be out.

I love that. Meet people, go out, get involved, get activities, all this stuff. I agree, because I lived all in my 20s, dude. I was never around. We were just doing something. Same, same, always on the move. Doing shit, doing spots, going somewhere,

going to hang out with groups of people. Now in my 40s, dude, I'm home. Yeah, it's true. It's over. I never leave the house now. And think about the comfort we need now. Like back in the day, I'd ride back row, middle seat, cross country on a flight.

Yeah. Now I gotta get in that lounge. Oh dude, I would have stood if they offered it. Yeah, exactly. If they were standing room only, I'd have been like, I'll pay for that 100%. Back in the day, I didn't even remotely bother me. No, we were tanks.

It was a young man's game. You eat ramen noodles. Your body bounces back differently too. Oh yeah, you could take Red Eyes. You could eat, red eyes were great. Take one tomorrow. Yeah, it was fine. Are you?

Yeah, I'm stupid. Oh, you go back to New York? Yeah. Red eye in New York is a, I hate it. Nightmare. I hate it. I hate it so, dude, that's like, I've had to do it a few times, you know,

when someone's like, we need you in the morning, so you have to leave like tonight. Yep. I hate it, your whole day is fucked. It never works. You can't function. You go, I'll sleep on the plane. Never, not a wink,

because you know you have to sleep. So it's like getting a boner when you need one. We just don't bounce back the same, do we? Fucking like, Mark and I have been running this set every night, like multiple times a night, and I've been sick for the last week. So it's like, we had the IV nurse in here yesterday, we're bouncing jokes, she's like not laughing.

We're like, well this isn't helping the confidence, what are you gonna do? But we're like looking over to see if she's listening, she's like, mm. She's like, please, fuck me in here, don't do these jokes, don't get rid of that. The IV thing is the new revolution, I got an IV with Chappelle at Chappelle's house.

It's so douchey, but it does help. Wow. It was great, dude, it was awesome. Where'd you went with Chappelle? I was at, we went to, Bobby and I went to Yellow Springs. Oh cool. Crazy story. Let's hear it, How's the club?

Hey, hey, folks. We Might Be Drunk is brought to you by Shopify. If you're ready to start that new business in 2025, you need Shopify. It's amazing. Get your store up and running with thousands of customizable templates, no coding or design skills required. Shopify helps out with the details like shipping, taxes, payments from one single dashboard so you can focus on the important stuff like growing your business. I love Shopify. We run a goddamn business ourselves. The jokes, the writing, the clips, the merch, the booze.

You gotta have Shopify folks. They even have a social media tool that allows you to connect all your channels and make shoppable posts so you can sell anywhere and everywhere that people scroll. Established in 2025, has a nice ring to it, doesn't it? Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at Shopify.com slash drunk, all lowercase go to Shopify.com slash drunk to start selling with Shopify today Shopify.com slash drunk. Hey folks we might be drunk as a bunch by Chubbies. Did you get another stupid novelty mug instead of the Chubbies clothing you really wanted this Christmas? We've all been there. Fulfill your own wish list and treat yourself to Chubbies. Start with their everywhere pants.

I'm wearing them right now. I have them at home. I love them. They're great. Designed for every occasion, whether you're headed into the office or just kicking around on the weekends. I wear Chubbies all the time.

That jacket is Chubbies. I don't know where the hell I put it. I got a flannel from them that's pretty cool. I wear those pants constantly. Oh yeah. Great stuff. Be sure to add Chubbies ultimate training shorts to those active days with split side seams and extended liner every

detail is perfection whether you're crushing it on leg day or hobbling back to your car after crushing it on leg day. Chubbies is here to help you take on 2025 in style starting with the comfiest most versatile gear you've ever worn for a limited time our friends at Chubbies are giving listeners 20% off with the comfiest, most versatile gear you've ever worn. For a limited time, our friends at Chubbies are giving listeners 20% off with the promo code DRUNKS at checkout at chubbyshorts.com. That's 20% off your order with the promo code DRUNKS. Support our show and tell them we sent ya. No matter where the new year takes ya, Chubbies has the gear to keep you comfy and looking your best.

Chubby. Chubby. Awesome, it was incredible. Did it just open? I think this is like the fifth or sixth month. Oh wow. But it's not like comics come in for the weekend. You know, it's like he just does shows whenever he wants to do shows.

Right. That's cool, there's the mothership and then there's the I never had a father ship. All right. All right. Okay. It was great, dude. Dave invited us out there and we did like a little thing

for his wife's brother had passed and it was like a celebration. Oh wow. And I guess he was a fan of Bob and I show, like like bad friends. Wow. Yeah, it was kind of cool. And then Dave was like, would you come perform?

And we flew out there and Dave was so gracious, showed us around and I don't know, man, he's the king. I can't say enough, cause it sounds like I'm kissing his ass, but like honestly was so rad. Took us around and we hung out at the lounge with him and Donnell came by, which was great. And Talib Kweli, it was like, it was awesome, man. Crazy time.

And then the venue was, it's unbelievable. And it's kind of intimate, right? I would say it's probably like VU size in terms of crowd numbers. It's probably what, because VU's. 250 or something? Yeah, it's almost 300. That's perfect.

Sounds about right, like maybe 275. It's in an old firehouse. And it's cool, it's like a great, I don't know, man, it's wonderful. And they're so stoked that you're there. It's in the middle of nowhere. I mean, this is. It's kind of like an offset of Dayton, Ohio.

Dayton's I think the closest city. Got it. But dude it's, you know. Does it fill up? Oh, I mean it's sold out. It sells out like. Yeah, 275 is gonna sell out. It sells out so fast.

I know but with a really small area you just don't know. People make the drive. Oh they all make the drive, yeah. Yeah, it's like a destination. Oh yeah, he was hyping us up too. He's so funny, he's still a comic. Yeah. And he was like, man, he's like, y' hyping us up too. He's so funny, he's still a comic. Yeah. And he was like, man, he's like,

y'all sold out so fast. To make you feel good, you know what I mean? Where you're like, well it's you, so it's Chappelle's club, right? But you guys, you and Bobby were a huge audience. Yeah, but I mean, fuck us, it's like it's his club. Like, he could put up the ticket and be like, I might not even show up, people will go to that club,

it's him. So like, it was nice of him, but I was also like, yeah, it's to see Dave Chappelle's home. What's the green room like? Fucking unreal. Tequila? Probably the best green room on earth. Come on.

Really? There's two of them. Well, there's an upstairs just for comedians, and then there's a downstairs, I think a private bar for family and friends in comics. Wow. What's in the green room? What are we talking?

That's perfect. Everything, name it, whatever you need. I mean, like a beautiful lounge, TV for, if you have sports or anything is on, a full bar, anything you want dude. Damn. It's like, they run that place, it's like a four seasons hotel.

I mean, it's incredible. Well the- It's top of the line. The store is pretty great, I mean you go in there, you get free weed, you get free snacks, and there's a massage table, that's so LA. That's right, that is very LA. New York would never have a massage table at the fucking- That was the most LA shit I've ever seen.

Josh Ademeier is the host with a giant dog on stage. Yeah, yeah, he does, yeah, he loves it. He can't do that in New York, he doesn't bring a dog. No, no way. No, the store is very, because what I love about the store is that we do have a history of like, wackadoos and weirdos, and that place was always weird, man.

We were like home to chaos. You know, like Don Barris's late night shows and the Ding Dong show, and you know, every year, I don't know if he's doing it anymore, but when I was coming up, Bob Zamuda would perform every year for a holiday show. He'd do like a week in the main room. Wow, that was Andy Kaufman's writer, assistant guy.

Right, right, who, if you just know about the history of Kaufman and the relationship between the character he played, Zamuda was like his best friend who would play the character of Tony Clifton. I know this is inside baseball, but Tony would perform at the store during the holidays, and Zamuda was doing it for a long time. Damn.

But we welcomed chaos like that. Like it was like, the store was like home to really kind of like. It's got a circus-y freak show feeling. Freak show vibe, yeah, yeah, it's a freak show vibe where the seller is way more comedy business, comedy business. Yeah, the store was like, anything can go.

That's kind of why. I love that aspect. I love it, man. It's like a fucking slaughterhouse now, just four rooms, every room, we're just like, you know, on top of each other, it's crazy. It's, well, I mean, it's great. The comedy's changing so fast too,

so everything is so different now. But it's a good thing, I guess. I see a lot of young people now that I'm, it's nice to watch new comics that I'm like, damn. Yeah. They're good. Whoever that is is really good. It's cool to watch people. You see anyone in New York where you're like, oh shit, that's...

Who did I see that I saw that was real? I mean, a lot of people that I saw on the lineup I knew. I mean, I always give props. Anytime I see Ryan Hamilton, he's not new obviously, but I love that guy. Killer. Great. I just love watching him. His rhythm is wonderful.

He's great. And he's so against the tides. If the night was very high energy, and he goes up there and he like brings it at his level, and he crushes. I'm waiting for him to put out this new special. I love that guy. I think he's one of the best writer performers

in his own space that like doesn't, he does not compromise. He's him all the time. He doesn't change his tone because the room is different. He recently got hit by a bus. I don't know if you heard about that. That made him better. It made him better.

He's got a 30 minute chunk on it and it's insane, it's so good. Listen up Young Comics, walk against traffic if you're looking for a new 15. He's great, but I mean there was a lot, I mean I saw a lot of people that I was followed, I told you guys this last night, Louie and Rock followed me like three shows in a row, which was crazy, because I was waiting for them to be like, hey those guys are going to slide in front of you and I was like, yeah whatever,, but they didn't. But then Louis stood and watched and. Redhead love. Redhead love, baby.

His first line out of his mouth on the show at the bar, or at the lounge, he goes, I used to look like that. Ah! That's great, dude. Burr used to do that to me a lot. Burr would be like, that's it, yeah. You're gonna replace me. When I was his age, I had hair.

You're only here to replace me. Yeah. Yeah, you're coming, he's coming for my job. No one's coming for your job, dude, you're fine. Yeah, Burr is, Burr would do that a lot, but then Louie and Rock were back to back, so I just stood and watched those guys do their thing too. Amazing.

This is awesome to watch, dude. Damn, I wish I was there. He's still the best. You see Rock's SNL was pretty great. Yeah, I watched, I saw just the monologue, I didn't see the sketches. That's all I saw too, yeah. That's all we watch.

Yeah, I don't really see the sketches anymore. Me neither. I like weekend updates though. Yeah, that's good too. I always liked those, because they let people do a bit or a character. Right. That I really liked.

Yeah, when Sarah Sherman goes out and just does something wacky. Dude, I love her. She cracks me up. She's so funny, man. She's funny. Because they let her fly. It's like, they're not trying to put her in this thing.

They're like, just do whatever weird shit you're gonna do. She's wacky and fun. Right, it reminds me of the way they used to let Samberg and those boys go off. Yeah. When they would do a bit sometimes where you're like, this is not hitting, but it's great. It's great because it's so weird and often

kind of wrong and bad. Right. And you're like, who cares? At least they're trying. Saylor weird and often kind of wrong and bad. Right. You're like, who cares? At least they're trying. Saylor would go on to do Pickle Arm. Yeah. You're like, who the fuck wrote that? And who approved that?

But it was like freewheeling back then. But I have so much admiration for these people. I've always been a low energy act, so at least at mics I could kind of, you know, there'd be the obvious bomb because it'd be an obvious punch line. Yeah, yeah. But at least I was low energy. I'd see guys like Nick Vadrat who were so funny, but when he would bomb, he'd be an obvious punchline. But at least I was low energy. I'd see guys like Nick Vadrat who were so funny, and when he would bomb, he'd be like sweating for six people.

And I'd be like, how the, that, we always talk about like what's brave. That's brave. That's brave. That scares me. When people can keep that high energy act up, even when the crowd isn't enjoying it, I don't know. But that's what they're doing.

It's like, it's either gonna work or it's not. But you gotta, if you're doing sketch comedy, you gotta maintain that energy. Well, I'm not talking any shit, but I remember back in the day watching Sebastian. Whoa. Because Sebastian is very like animated and he's very like, it's characterized.

Sure. And he would do that even if the room wasn't packed out. You know what I mean? Like if it was a workout night, he committed. He still would commit to that character, which is, you gotta be in on that character. Oh yeah. You know what I mean? Like if it was a workout night, he committed. He still would commit to that character, which is, you gotta be in on that character. Oh yeah. You know what I mean?

Like, cause he's very, he's, there it is. Thank God, dude. I was something to break this up. Wow. No, he's the man, but he would do the same thing. I was always like, that's fucking wild to be able to do that. You're farting in a hotel?

In a hotel room? Who does that? You ever been in one of these hotels, they don't let you fart out? You wear pajamas at the airport? Aren't you embarrassed? Why do you fart so much more than me? We've been eating the exact same shit.

Turkey sausage, got me. I had it too. You got IBS? Maybe. You are Jewish. I'm fucking with you. Yeah, he might be. You have Crohn's?

Crohn's is coming. No, no, I got an iron stomach. I mean, I get it all out, the gas chamber. There's Indian comics who do the black voice. I think Norman's doing the Jew voice. Yeah, you are! Oh, that's good! You're Jew-facing.

You're Jew-facing. Stop Jew-facing, dude. We're getting sick of it, dude. We don't like it. We talk about it. There's a whole community about it. Oh, my body's a temple. All right.

Say something Jewish, quick. Quick, quick, quick. My back! Oh, fuck. It's drafty in quick. My back. Oh fuck. It's drafty in here. My back. Dude, maybe I am Jewish, my back's hurt. You're welcome for the weather.

How bad is your back? Awful dude, it sucks. What happened, sports? Years ago, sports injury and then it keeps coming back. I just can't get rid of it. Well, initially I heard it playing basketball and then when I was running, I re-injured it

on like a long distance eight mile run. I re-injured it coming off of a fucking curb. It was just in dusk at night and I didn't see the curb drop was bigger than a normal curb drop. So my body just wasn't looking down, it was looking forward. And all my weight went to one side

and I was like, holy. There's nothing worse than getting injured. Like how did he get injured? And you're like, he fell. He fell. It's so sad. It's all curb. Because you hear did he get injured? And you're like, he fell. He fell. I know. It's so sad. It's all curb.

Cause you hear that as you're kidding, you're like fell. Right. I fall all the time. Yeah. But I mean, basketball is the one when you get older. Cause like my whole identity was like, I'm going to be the hustle guy. I'll make, I'll get every loose ball.

Yeah. Like that way if my jump shot is not going, the team's not mad at me. Right. I'll hustle. But then you get older, you're like, I'm not fucking hustling. I'm not breaking it.

That's true. No, I got dunked on in, where I was hustle, but then you get older, you're like, I'm not fucking hustling, I'm not gonna get hurt. That's true. No, I got dunked on in, I was in, not Charlotte, what's the, oh God, why can't I think the room, the name of the room, Comedy. Good Nights? Good Nights, Good Nights. I was at Good Nights and there was a YMCA

right down the block and I was like, I kinda wanna go work out, but then maybe shoot around, because I know there's always courts at YMCA. So I go, I lift a little bit and then I go down there and I'm just shooting by myself. This young kid is like, hey, hey yo, you wanna play? Uh oh.

And I was like, no man, I'm all right. And he's like, come on man, come on, come on, come on, we need one, da da. So I was like, okay, so I'll just go fill space. I was like, I'll just pass. That is so scary to me. Dude, I go over there, I'm like, I kind of evolved into this young like 19 year old,

like just jacked black kid, just gets up and I don't even jump, I just kind of get out of the way, you know what I mean? And then they're all like, oh, oh, he dunked on your ass, he dunked on your ass. And I was like, dude, I got a whole life outside of this. I don't give a fuck. This means nothing to me. This means nothing to me, dude.

Whatever you think I feel, I do not. I promise you, it's not happening. I wouldn't care less. I was thinking about a cup of coffee I wanted yeah exactly and I want to go get coffee in this cone good to move out of the way because you get the nuts In the face you start falling down I We did that on the last tour run We do know we just pop in any rec center or why in the country and play hoops and we played a game with guys

And we've been on like a hot shoot not like just everything's good yeah we play a game like the second to last day and I'm fucking guy I'm guarding he's just like he's got handles yeah he's gonna I'm gonna get hurt yeah I'm gonna get fucking hurt and I'm playing DM them and we're winning I'm like we're gonna fucking win and I'm like the second he had no jump shot but his handles were so good that I'm like I'm gonna play up on him yeah I mean, give him space, I mean, so. Yeah, let off of him. Let him fucking, let him shoot,

but he's trying to take it off. And on one fucking play, I just twist, I just roll the ankle and I'm just like, is it the Achilles? And then I'm like, no, it's just an ankle. But I'm like, I'm out for days. Yeah, you're done, yeah. A rolled ankle.

I'm like, I take my shoe off and they're like, that is fucking swollen. Yeah, it looks like those old Kobe shoes. Remember those that is fucking, looks like a fucking, yeah. Looks like those old Kobe shoes, remember those bricks? I'm like, oh fuck. And yeah, and then you have to stand under that night and you're just like, I'm like, I hate my life. I don't wanna be 41 and injured for one of my shows.

Yeah, of course. I just don't wanna be on stage injured for a show and someone's like, what happened? Like those jujitsu guys who have cauliflower ear and then just do stand up and you're like, that sucks, you're in pain. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Also, it's the weirdest looking shit.

Just wear, I would be the pussy that wears the ear caps or whatever. Fuck it, dude, I'm not making, these things are already big, I don't need them any bigger. Right. I feel like our ears get bigger as dudes. I don't know why. They do, I think they do. Ears and schnaz's, yeah, they never stop.

Sorry, dude. Ah, the dick done changed though. That's the problem. The balls get more heavy. No, but Jews already have nice cocks. He's fine. Is that right? Yeah.

Fine. Yeah, no, no, no, don't they? Isn't that one of the rumors? Ari's packing. Is he? Oh, huge. It's skinny and long and skinny. Yeah, it's long and skinny.

Yeah, I guess. It looks like him. Trust me, him and I go to the spa together. I've seen, I've seen. I've been down that road. Huge bag. Big bag. Big balls, huge balls.

Huge balls. Which is funny, I never wanted big balls Mm-hmm. This is a thing that's very strange dick by comparison. It's doing nothing in the way too. It's too much It's already out there. I'm bike riding. It's a target Yeah, you're pissing on your balls Shane no minor down to the floor. I got the bad the long bag. You got a long bag. It's bad Tight bag mine still pretty. You got a long bag. It's bad, long, all, airy. I got a tight bag, mine's still pretty tight. Women like a tight bag.

Do they? Oh yeah, oh yeah. Stamp Hermes on it, women like a nice tight, pricey bag. Nice clutch. Yeah, I put the chain on it. That would be a great tattoo. Yeah, just get a nice little barcode on your ball sack. Louis Vuitton on my nuts.

In LA it would work. That's true. Probably nowhere else. This is where that culture is. Everybody here, everyone here tries to outshine one another all the time. When you're young you see it a lot. Everyone tries to outdo each other.

And then you see the older LA, which is like then nobody wants to outdo anybody. Then everyone's quiet about their success in LA. I like that. When you meet someone that's like very successful out here, they're about as, like, usually quiet and humble about it. You wouldn't even know. Yes.

You go to their house and you're like, holy shit. Well you see Zuckerberg, he's wearing flip flops and board shorts. Got it. Cause he's like, I'm so rich, I'm good. He doesn't need the attention. Exactly. That's why Sandler dresses like that.

He's like, I'm chilling. I'm chilling, I'm chilling, I'm chilling. But he's always been that way too. Yeah, he never changed. Yeah. He's kind of the same. That's true. The same chilling, I'm chilling, I'm chilling. But he's always been that way too. Yeah, he never changed. Yeah. He's kind of the same. That's true. The same cat as when he was at the beginning.

He's another great dude that I think is such an underrated standup. Oh, that's such an underrated standup. The two specials are so fun. Yeah, but I think people just know him as Sandler. They don't know, they don't know. I think he's such a good standup. I did a bunch of the live shows, they're so fun.

So rad. They're such good shows. I mean, and the way he breaks up with the music, it's a fun, that voice, like we're all similar ages, that voice is like a staple in our childhood. Oh, do do do, ah ha. In the way that, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. In the way that like we're embedded in people's ears

because of podcasting, he was like the original podcast, like, cause the CDs were like podcasts. Oh, the CDs. I listened to those things a billion times. So did I, they're all gonna laugh at you. Stan and Judy's Kid, and they're all gonna laugh. Yes. I listened to all those so much.

The Goat song. Yeah, I just had headphones on, walking around and listening to that album. It was so good. He made Jews likeable. No, that sounds bad. No, no, no, hold on, hold on. Let me sit with that for a second.

Hold on, let me sit with that for a second. No white kid, like you're not white, but no like, goy or Gentile. Yeah, he's white too. We didn't know about Hanukkah. That song put Hanukkah on the map. I didn't know anything about it. I'm from Louisiana.

Well that's because you grew up in Louisiana. Yeah, maybe. And Jews aren't allowed down there. That's true, that's true. Isn't that a sign? Welcome, no Jews. Welcome, everyone, butt Jews. No, I grew up in Chicago.

We had a lot, Jews was Jews. But Hanukkah, that was the first, I mean we just had Dreidel, and then he put Jews on the map. Exactly. It did help, it did help. And then a list That was the first, I mean we just had Dreidel and then he put Jews on the map. Exactly. It did help. It helped. And a list of all the Jews and you're like,

Paul Noon's half? Hey, all right, maybe these guys aren't so bad. That was some good ass PR for us. Huge. Sandy Koufax too. That's right. That was great that he knew and he named athletes. I was like, oh no shit.

Yeah. That's pretty good. And when he hit, and all three Beastie Boys. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but we knew, but we knew. We knew, yeah, That's pretty good. And all three Beastie Boys. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, but we knew, but we knew. We knew, yeah, we knew. Even then as a kid I was like,

something's different about these three guys. These aren't Irish pricks from my neighborhood. You gotta fight for your right to Kvetch. Okay, that's a long way to go. I was waiting for it and I thought, what is it gonna be? What's the third? To Kvetch, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Sandler did a thing though that made being immature, but still funny, like okay for adults. Yes, he was silly. It can still be silly. I like the whimsy that he's still being goofy and silly. Opera man, shit like that. A lot of times guys get older, they just take themselves so serious.

They start taking themselves really serious and then you lose all that. I'm not gonna name names, but there that. A lot of times guys get older, they just take themselves so serious. They start taking themselves really serious and then you lose all that like, you know, I'm not gonna name names, but there's guys that we know that they got older and it's almost like, where's the fucking, I know. Where's the whimsy, man? Where's the taking yourself not serious

and shitting on the wild weird stuff? I think that's where comedy starts to die when you get too old and you're like, I don't wanna. Right. Like when Carlin was at the end, he was so fucking angry. Right. The land special's good, it's bad for you,

you had good shit. It was the second to last one where I was like, ah, this is kind of rough, the lights were losing. It was just kind of like so disenfranchised with the world and you're like, I don't know, I still kind of like some of it. Like you hated everything and you're like, all right, all right. That's a good point.

I liked it when he had it, because when he was young, he was filled with like wacky, whimsy, weird. That's what I loved about him. Why don't mice have shoulders? Yeah, what the fuck? That's so great. That's such a good bit. I think that's what you,

if you lose that in comedy, I think you're, that's why when with Bob and I, that's what I love about the show the most is that it's childish. It's so immature and childish. And it's my favorite time. Every time we shoot the show, it's fun. It's so immature and childish and it's my favorite time. Every time we shoot the show it's fun

because it's gonna be goofy and stupid, it's stupid. It's an escape for people too. The world's all wacky and then you watch that and you're just like ah, it's nice. I know because when all this Trump stuff on the podcast was going down. Did they hit you up? No, no, no, no.

None of the politicians wanted to come on Bad Friends. It's actually interesting. No, no, because we don't do politics on our show because we don't ever play the game. We avoid it too because we want it to be like a fun. Well, what did this guy say? Fucking Republicans buy sneakers too, my friend. Yeah.

It's like the greatest line of all time. It's not wrong. Republicans buy sneakers too, man. They were like, make a stance. He's like, fuck that dude, I'm trying to get rich. Yeah. No, we don't talk politics because I don't give a fuck and I don't care to, but also we had a. It's everywhere. It doesn't need to be. It's too much. That's the thing, it's like, we don't talk politics because I don't give a fuck and I don't care to, but also we had a.

It's everywhere. It doesn't need to be. It's too much. That's the thing, it's like, come here and it'll just be fun, comedy, stories. It's stupid. We had a, and this is not, look, we had a conversation with someone about

what if Kamala was gonna do a pod run, because she did a couple of female podcasts. Yeah, call her daddy. They were gonna be like, would you do a comedy pod with her? Not Bad Friends, but you two host like a thing with her? And I was like, no, absolutely not. Really? No fucking way, dude.

I don't want any of that shit. I would, it's the same thing with Trump. I don't want him fucking on my show. Why? I don't want them on our show. And it's funny that they're looking to comedians to humanize these people. Yeah, and I don't want to. our show. It's funny that they're looking to comedians to humanize these people. Yeah, and I don't want to. These are, they're inhumane.

These are all terrorists. They're all bad people. I don't want them on my show. I agree. I don't like what they bring. I don't like what they bring. Like that's not even, she's an afterthought now. So imagine you just had her and now it's all over.

It's a waste. We were not interested, man. And they said the same thing. They were like, well, what do Trump? I was like, no, dude, we don't want, these aren't our people. Why are we pretending that they're our people? They're not.

It's a good point. No, I'm not gonna shill for these fucking politicians. No, so no way, never. But that's what, you know, that's what we were, Bob and I talked about, like when we do get offers for guests sometimes, because we don't love guests anyway, sometimes there are people that I'm like, oh, this is them just looking for a come up on our show.

They don't like our show or know us. It's a good point, too. Or give a fuck about us. You know what I mean? That is so funny that they kind of have to pretend a little. Yeah, it's bullshit. But they all do that. You can tell that whenever these people go on those shows, not just politicians, but super famous big people,

they've been slotted into a show. You're like, they don't fucking. Now you're just turning into the Tonight Show. You're just a guest on a couch and the host has to pretend like he loves you and you have to pretend like you love him even though it's like we don't fucking know this. At least Theo, he's got some cocaine jokes with Trump.

Like there's some moments. That was super fun. See like at least he kept it funny and Theo-y. You never did cocaine, Andy. Did you ever struggle, dude? No, I never touched this stuff. I'll tell you who I did touch, just a list of names of women.

No, yeah, he got to play it up. It was, I mean, you know, but that's, Theo is in that different atmosphere. He really is. He's like a conversationalist. Chalamet, I mean, he's getting A-listers. Yeah, I mean, you know, he's plugged into the, he's plugged into the Hollywood pipeline now.

Yeah, he is. Bob and I are slime, we're trash. Nobody really wants, like famous people are, we had Cena and Efron on because I did a movie with those guys and they were cool about it, but I could tell that the PR people were losing their fucking mind in the room. Really?

Yeah, because John is super playful and doesn't care, and Cena doesn't, I mean, and Efron doesn't give fuck either, but their room was filled with all their PR people. Ah, I hate that. And they were like, very wide eyed. Yeah, because. And they're just taking notes, gotta cut this. Well, we didn't have to cut it.

Yeah. Because the boys were like, whatever you guys want in there, because Bobby's gonna be crazy. Yeah. He's gonna ask John Cena if he wants to see his asshole. Yes. Leave it in.

That's comedy. That's fucking funny, man. Yeah, and also those guys have senses of humor. A lot of people just get bridled by these PR teams that think it's gonna hurt the rep of the film. It's like, no, it's not. They wanna see him be human. Exactly, and that's why comedy's thriving, because we don't have a fucking PR guy here.

Right, well, he is right there. That, yeah, he is. Well, we'll shoot him. In the back, though, turn around. Yeah, CEO style. That was cold, man. Why do you shoot him in the back? Just go look at his face.

Shoot him in the front. Yeah. You think he should have a good line? That's old Western. Get your shine box. Yeah. That's old Western rules, though. That's old gangster rules, too.

You can't shoot someone in the back. That's cowardly. Interesting. Shoot him in the front. This guy's not a gangster. Yes, he is. That's the most gangster shit on Earth. He's a wop.

To wait all night and then shoot somebody? Yeah. That's a hit man. He's a daggo. It's a hit man. He's a daggle. It's a hit man, it's not a gag. It's a hit man, right. But who was the hit plan? Who planned the hit?

He did. Kaiser Permanente. Maybe they're fucking. And another health insurance company was like, go get them. Damn. Take a mile. That's your people.

You and Mount Sinai. The Keizers. I saw someone say, you tell these kids thoughts and prayers after every school shooting and you expect them I saw someone say, you tell these kids thoughts and prayers after every school shooting and you expect them to be desensitized, or not to be desensitized to violence. That's true. That's actually great, I don't know, that's very, well they do, they just had a Catholic school shooting

two days ago. Another lady. In Madison or something. A lady did it. No, no, no, no. I think it was a woman. Oh, it was? A woman shooter.

Yeah. Samantha something. Finally. Sabrina Inescu, she's a good shooter. Finally dude. Finally they got a woman other school shooter. The first one was a woman. First school shooting in America was a woman.

We never hear about groundbreaking stories like this the other way. Yeah, exactly. She's the Jackie Robinson of shooting kids. First female shooter before her first female president. That's right. Well, we can't have that. You're right. No, no,'t have that. You're right.

No, no, no. Anyway, when you get along with a woman, they're like, I don't want a woman president. You're like, but you're a woman. It is funny how many women didn't vote for her. Oh yeah, crazy. You thought, they thought, man, the news was like sure of it.

They were like, it's gonna be a landslide. Yeah. They were like wrong way. Well, dude, all like the view and all these shows, yeah, they did, they pushed. That's a bubble. Well, you know what I mean? That's the problem with the media now is like,

they're so trapped in their brain, they weren't even, we had one of these betting sites where you could bet on the election. They sponsored one of our shows. And I was cool with it because it wasn't like aligned with a political party, was just like bet on the election itself. I was like, that's rad.

I think that's, you bet on anything else, why not? I lost seven K in the new Comptroller, but you know. Yeah, Department of Agriculture, I got clipped on, man. I shouldn't have done that. No, but they were like, they showed us the polls on the insides of like what the betting numbers are like. They show them on the website, but they show them live. It's crazy how many people bet on Trump.

Like the disparity was massive. To lose. No, to win. To win, oh wow. Because the amount of people that were betting were probably betting, were voting for was massive. To lose. No, to win. To win, oh wow. Because the amount of people that were betting were probably betting, were voting for Trump anyway. Yeah, exactly. So the numbers were so upside down, it was kind of crazy.

Wow, but Vegas is usually right. Vegas is right about sports. Okay. They know something. They know, well they do. I told you, I bet on the under last night on the Bears game and just snuck it out. Just snuck it out.

They know how to get you too, because I'll have a hot streak where I keep winning and then I just lose and lose and lose. Yeah, it's planned, it's perfect. They know how to get you excited. The only thing they can't get you on is if you're at a live table game, like because I'm a big Blackjack fan.

So live table games, that's you, you can control the rhythm of that. You bet, you play on your phone. No, no, no, no, I only, I go to the casino, when I go to the casino. That's the move. You can't do like Fandu out here, can you? You have to go through another site.

You have to go through other sites or you have to have a guy. Ooh. Old school. Yeah, we all have a guy. Everyone's got a guy. You got a Luigi? So yeah, Mario is brother. He's in the ground. No, yeah, you gotta have a little bit of guy,

but you can play. There are companies you can play out here. It's just as a little roundabout way of doing it. Nice. It's not as direct as when you're in a fully legal state. But the irony is we have casinos out here. You just drive into the fucking, into the. We were just talking about that. Mark was saying like, you know,

Texas is all about freedom. You got guns, you can't go on fucking porn sites. Yeah. Well, I just get a VPN, my guy. Ooh. I VPN my phone everywhere I go. It's a lot of work. No, what do you mean?

It takes five seconds. You install it, turn it on and off. That's it. It's just No, what do you mean? It takes five seconds, you install it, turn it on and off, that's it. It's just an app. I can't sign in. Anything with signing in, I'm out. No, you can sign into the Pornhub because they want your license.

No, no, I mean anything you have to sign in for, like with a password, I just blank out. Oh no, VPN, you put it on your phone once and then that's it. Then all you have to do is click on or off. And here's the wild shit, they integrate it into your phone. So if I go to my settings, look.

Is it free? See, it says VPN right there. Oh wow. I can just turn it on or off wherever I am. Oh does that work to watch like sports too? Anything, everything. I did it initially so I could stream shit in a local channel if I was out and I wanted to watch.

In Canada or something. Yeah, even if I was in another state and they're not gonna show whatever game that I wanna watch, then I can just VPN it and I can still get the local feed or whatever. Whoa, cause Canada, you go there, I'm on the road, they don't have Pandora, they're like, we don't have Pandora or Venmo.

But they blocked it, a lot of them learned. Because I would set my VPN for Chicago, so it says where your set site is and where you really are, and I would set it for Chicago so I could watch Chicago local channels, some of these streamers caught up. Damn. And they block you now, because they know, they're like, looks like you're out of your own,

blah, blah, whatever the fuck. I know, dude, you're not getting enough money from me already Scam artists we all thought we were gonna save money. We're getting smoked by all these streamers so true whatever who cares Take it from me. I'm gonna die anyway. They're struggling to these streamers They're all shelling out money for this movie that movie that no one watches it. Yeah, but we are in downtown LA. Yeah Yes, do not crush is not doing that good. Oh Good point no, but they don't care because like Apple is spending more money than ever, but they sell phones

and Amazon is spending more money than ever on TV and film and they sell fucking paper towels. These companies don't give a shit. That's the problem is they couldn't, they're like no one wants the show. Who fucking cares, dude, they wanna sell vacuums. They really don't give a shit. Anyway, watch my new special,

same old you change on Amazon. Dude, I'm on Hulu next year, and you know, that same thing, I'm hoping it works because they're new to the comedy thing, to the stand-up world. I don't know. I wouldn't want to be first. I think you're in a good spot, hopefully.

Yeah, I'm at the end of the year. I'm in some kind of like- I've heard about all these big names coming up, and then you get your fans over there. Yeah, I'm at the, I don't, maybe it's around September, so I don't know the exact month, but I did say, I was like, I don't want to be at the beginning of the year, because they were like, how fast month, but I did say I was like, I don't wanna be at the beginning of the year,

because they were like, how fast do you wanna tape? I was like, not fast. Shows how cocky Gaff can be, he's like, I'll go first, fuck it. He's got a huge fan base. He's also the fucking, that guy's a machine. He really is. He's a machine, dude.

Clean and just prolific as hell. Great comedy. When you get him one on one too, he really does give you a different side of him. I don't know if you've sat with him ever, Tim. Oh, I love behind the scenes Gaff. Flick my nuts. Yeah, dude. He'll give you a different side of him. I don't know if you've sat with him ever too. Oh, I love behind the scenes gaff. Flick my nuts. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he'll give you a little flick, dude.

He grabbed my pussy. Little flick in the neck. Yeah. All right, your zipper's undone a little bit. Leave it like that though, I do want to maybe take a little sneak peek. There we go. Something falls out.

See the gold bond. Yeah, you powder every day? Not every day, but I'll get a little swampy, so I throw some real. You bring it on the road? Oh yeah. Swampy in December? It's bad, I'm a bad guy. It's all Hunter Biden powder.

It's real bad down here. Where's the laptop, dude? Show us the history. Yeah. I don't do that, I don't do that, because after that stuff came out about giving people fucking cancer. What's that now?

Your dick can get cancer? Talcum powder was giving people cancer, right? What? Isn't that a thing? God, what does this? Oh no, no, you know what it was? Yeah, it was baby powder, Talcum powder was giving people cancer, right? What? Isn't that a thing? God, who doesn't? Oh no, no, you know what it was? Yeah, it was baby powder, talcum powder. Baby powder was giving, it was something about women.

It was either breast cancer, it was like, no, uterine cancer or something like that. All right, we're good. No, you're next, dude. Oh yeah, there was a lawsuit about baby powder. That's right. It was one of the powders and it was giving people cancer. Remember DiPaulo's bit about that,

about the playing basketball, put the talcum powder on, I get a nice pancake batter going in my shorts. I go for a layup, a Belgian waffle came out of my pants. Who was that? DiPaulo, old Nick DiPaulo. That's fuckin' great. Where's he at?

He's in Georgia, yeah. In the south? Yeah. He was a New York guy, right, forever? Big New York guy. Boss in the New York. Sometimes they leave, you guys will never, right, forever? Big New York guy. Boston then New York. Sometimes they leave, you guys will never leave, you'll never leave New York.

I don't think so. I don't think so. I think I get, I don't think I function well outside there for too long. I go back to the South for three days and I'm like, I gotta get the fuck out of here. It's so slow and hot. I get that, well that's the South South though.

That's true. Like I could do Charleston. Charleston's beautiful. Will you ever move to New York or is Bobby just keeping you here? You know I want to but Bobby's got a grip on me and he will not leave Los Angeles. So if the show ever does.

Why does he like LA so much? I mean he's got a sick place. He's from San Diego. Right. Oh, there you go. And he loves Los Angeles because he's a creature of habit and comfort, dude. He likes to go to the same restaurants.

Yeah. You think we all forget he's 52 years old. Well he can't even drop Kalei'la. Yeah. Yeah. He likes what he likes, dude. But he just is a creature of habit and comfort. So, you know, I get it.

But we're also working on other stuff now, which is kind of fun. We were doing like Bad Friends Productions now. But it's fun to make shit. And we got stand up and you know. Well, that's why I wanna keep making it on our own dime. I was like, let's just produce and finance it ourselves because then it's on us to make the money back.

I agree. Then the risk is higher but it's so much better reward than going through the system. Yes and it moves faster. The system's a nightmare. Yeah we did, we had a meeting last night. Like we saw the space, we're lining up all the people that are gonna be a part of it so it's like we're in control.

Would you ever do like a live action movie with Bobby? Cause I could see that. Yeah, we try, we keep trying, man. We've had a couple of people pitch us on stuff, but like, it's gotta be a really good story because you know, nowadays everything is inundated with fucking superhero stuff. I know the movies are tough now,

but we're trying to make one and it's a process. It is a grind, but I mean, I think people do want us cause they see us in these worlds. They want us to do the other thing. Yeah. I think people don't know how hard it is to make it. I know. They know. They see what's out there. It just takes a lot of work to make something it's so many moving pieces and fucking it's hard yeah we'll try we'll try it we're trying. We're trying. God damn it. What is the taping tonight? Yeah. Wow. Yeah we're gonna hit

the sauna. Should I go? Hey we'd love to have you. Maybe I you have Jim Doe's there, Jeff Ross, it's a fun hang. Oh, nevermind then. No, maybe I should go, seriously. Tim's character is really funny. It's gonna be really good. He kills it. Well, he's not playing, he's doing something. He's not doing himself.

He's a character. Come on, dude. Thank you. Don't squeeze. He's getting weaker, he's running out of steam. That's true. Yeah, man. Well, show's wrapping up.

It's not like you're used to, man. My butthole's loose. You on the road? Any dates to put on? Yeah, I'm doing, I start the year off, I have two months left until I tape my special. And I do Chicago Theater is my first one back. Woo, just did it, what a room.

That's so fun, man. It's so fun to go back home and to do it, it feels so, something about going home. So I do Chicago theater and then I do Durham and Charleston. I'm playing The Beacon in New York for all you New York fans. If I'm there, you guys gotta come by. I'll be there.

I'm playing The Beacon, I'm playing The Met in Philly. Wow. I'm doing four shows in Minneapolis. I'm doing two in San Francisco, two in San Diego. Great cities. So come out and see me at andrewsantino.com. This will be the end of a tour for me for a long time. I won't be able to tour for a while.

We're gonna be working on shit, so. I'm putting Minneapolis in the top 10 comedy cities. No one talks about it. It's such a great comedy town. Oh dude, I think, well, I'll say it now, is that I'm doing four shows there. We just announced a four show, and I'm filming my special there.

Oh, there you go. In Minneapolis. Are you filming four? I'm filming four. Smart. That's what I did. Yeah, I'm filming four, but I'm doing it two different ways.

So the first night is one way, and the second night's a different way. The second night is a woman. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, it is. It's me as a school shooter. So yeah, it'll be great. I'm filming it two different ways,

using two different teams, which is kind of a stupid idea. Interesting. Yeah, you'll see when it comes out. I just visually have an idea of what I think would be cool to watch, because the jokes are bad. So come out and see me at andrewsantino.com. Is that me changing the order? Is that what you mean by that?

No, no, no, I'm physically filming a different, I'm having a different camera crew and a different director. I think this is smart. I'm physically doing it different, I'm having like a different camera crew and a different director. I think this is smart. I'm physically doing it different twice. So the first two shows are gonna be one way, the second two shows are gonna be another way. For the crowd, it won't mean anything.

It'll be the same set, same hour, and 15 or whatever, but visually at home when it's done, they'll see how different it looked. They both look different. All right. You think you're gonna like maybe cut back and forth a little? I don't know, we're gonna figure it out.

I just had this idea to do it this way and then if it works, great, and if not, we'll just leave it the traditional. You know what I mean? Smart. It's kind of a win-win for me to just be like, we'll play with it, it's my money, I'm fucking, who cares, I might as well try.

Love it. You know, fuck it. This is smart, yeah, get innovative, get weird. We might as well. Maybe I'll come tonight, but what time, six? Eight. Eight. No pressure, I mean it's a taping. You know how that is, you gotta clap. I saw our horseshit last night. Yeah, but maybe I'll come tonight, but what time? Six? Eight. Eight. No pressure.

I mean it's a taping. You know how that is, you gotta clap. You saw our horseshit last night. Yeah, but maybe I'll just kid up with an agent and just come backstage with you guys and just fuck around backstage. Hang out. That would be better.

I don't wanna be in the crowd, because then it'll be too... It's a lot of work. Yeah, it is work to be in the crowd. It's a lot of work. It's funny. They're like, be alert, be awake, take a break. Now we're doing a reset.

Yeah, but we're grateful for those people. 100% true, we need them. Well they wanna see the thing live. It's cool to watch the process. Yeah, dude, Sam Black, audience. Remember she gets you all the audience at the show. She's awesome, old school New York woman. Dude, she would make sure that you wouldn't

fuck up the taping. She's so intimidating. Someone held in a pee that they peed their pants during a Jeslin-like taping. That's awesome. awesome. She's like you can't get up right now and the guy's like I just fucking pissed. Isn't that the isn't didn't she do our half hours? Yeah yeah I was like the name is so familiar she did the half hours with the peed himself. Wow. I did that at R. Kelly show. Jeslinic is that good huh? Yeah. Peed himself. Peed my pants. Some of you in the audience might even piss your pants. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Lip wrist. Lip wrist. Yeah, his special was great. Funny dude. I liked it. I didn't see it, I don't, specials are hard to watch now.

They're hard to watch. I just can't do it. Even my good friends, I'm like, I'll see it at some point. Yes. But I can't watch them right away because I get the anxiety. It's hard, I get anxious for some reason.

It's a war to watch. It is. Chunks, you do it in chunks, that's the move. Do it in chunks, baby. All right, well hey, where are you? You got a special coming out? Special coming out at the end of the year next year. Go to andresantino.com, go see me live.

I wanna sell out the Beacon so bad. You'll be like you guys when I grow up. Hell yeah, and check out Bad Friends, of course. Check out the Bad Friends podcast, the Whiskey Ginger, check them both out. These guys have been on it, they've been on all of it. But you have been on Bad, you guys didn check out Bad Friends, of course. Check out the Bad Friends podcast, Whiskey Ginger. Check them both out. These guys have been on it. They've been on all of it. But you have been on Bad.

You guys didn't do Bad together, did you? Have us on Bad together. Yeah, that's right, that's right. I've never done Bad. We should do it together. Come. We'll do Bad, no pressure. You know we'd love to have you, always.

Thank you, boys. Thank you, Andrew. Thank you, dude. Comedy. All right. What an app, boy. Santino's the man. Love it.

Great stuff, and where you gonna be? I got, well I just finished San Antonio, I guess. So I will be at Liberty Township, Ohio, the January 10th and 11th. I will be in Pittsburgh, January 23rd through 25th, and then the theaters start. Charlotte, Richmond, Philadelphia, DC, Bethlehem, Tulsa, Austin, Dallas, Houston, NOLA, your town, Memphis, Knoxville,

one of the best theaters, Nashville, Birmingham, Atlanta, Durham, these are all, oh, February too. Hell yeah. And then we got like New Haven, Providence, Portsmouth, added a second show there, thank you, Portsmouth, Portland, Maine, Burlington, Vermont, Montreal, Toronto, Buffalo, Albany, Columbus, I mean, it goes on and on, samorow.com slash shows, or follow Burlington, Vermont, Montreal, Toronto, Buffalo, Albany, Columbus. I mean, he goes on and on, samorail.com slash shows

or follow us on Punch Up. Yes. Punch Up dot live slash Samorail, Punch Up dot live slash Mark Normand. Oh yeah. What do you got coming up? Right now, I'm in Houston, Texas, then Phoenix, then Addison Improv in Dallas.

It's a fun one. Great little run of the south and then I'm going to Asheville to make up a date because of the hurricane. Asheville, North Carolina, love that town and then ended it all in the Ryman baby. One of the best. One of the best in Asheville. Beautiful. Can't wait and then I'm going back to Europe and Australia at some point.

Whoa. That's a like August. That fucking flight dude. I know. The flight back it's gonna get you. It kills you you it kills you and I can I tell you something by the way we didn't do this peeve but these fucking pillows there's no next support I know look at this fucking nothing this is bullshit every hotel listen instead of eight shitty pillows one decent one. Yeah. Just one.

Enough with the jizz stains, Jesus. I know, I'm sorry, I was horny. But yeah, get some better pillows. Get the head up Mike Lindell, whatever his name is. All right, love you guys. Bodega Cat's blowing up for sure. I don't know why I said it's doing okay. I'm tired, I'm jet lagged.

We're crushing, this is blowing up everywhere. All the clubs are buying it up. We're popping it up in bars and steak houses, bodegacatwhiskey.com, and lots of cool stuff coming with this, so stay tuned. Yeah, hear, hear. I hate when people say stay tuned. Eh, we'll back it up.

It's so douchey though. To be continued. Big announcement coming, those posts. Yeah, oh, I hate that. And it's never big. It's always like oh I'm getting divorced actually that would actually be pretty exciting for us yeah all right we'll see you all in hell. I've had a little too much burping And Norman's talking shit about the fucking

Pope And I get down in the same way Up on the roof like a cop's coming And naked Samuel is feeling dangerous I'm out to lunch here in New Orleans This woman doesn't look like I remember her And I get down in the same way We might be true