We're Here to Help - 44: She Said Yes (Probably)! with Eric Edelstein and Steve Berg

Episode Date: January 15, 2024

Jake, Gareth and special guest Eric Edelstein talk to a magician about polite goodbyes. Later, the guys and guest Steve Berg help a caller with a special request. Want to call in? Email ...your question to helpfulpod@gmail.com.Watch the video episodes of the podcast at Youtube.com/@HeretoHelpPodCheck out our We’re Here to Help sweatshirts, hats, and tote bags at heretohelppod.com!If you’re enjoying the show, make sure to rate We’re Here to Help 5-Stars on Apple Podcasts.Follow the show on Instagram @HereToHelpPod and TikTok also at @HereToHelpPodAdvertise on We’re Here to Help via Gumball.fm See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 And here we are! We're back! America's number one podcast, as long as you don't have access to the internet. 62 and... Baldy. Sunny. Oh, interesting twist. Welcome to We're Here to Help.
Starting point is 00:00:33 We have some... This is kind of a personal show for us, wouldn't you say? I would say. This one specifically. These are... I would say you were friends with Steve before me. You and I was friends with Eric. And then.
Starting point is 00:00:49 You guys were two. We were two. We started mixing. We were never really a four, though. Not really. No, you, Berg, and I sort of became a three. Eric was more me and him. And then he and Steve got close.
Starting point is 00:01:02 Yeah. But it's four people who like each other a ton. And Steve and Eric have gotten very close. Yes. And they've got a nice thing that they cook between the two of them. Yep. And but we wanted to have them both in and as we hoped and expected they were both just murder.
Starting point is 00:01:18 So Eric Edelstein is my first Los Angeles friend. I was living in the Los Palmas with my buddy Brian Farrell, and Eric in 2004 used to believe he was channeling Elvis Presley. Yep, we get into that a little bit, I think. He is a wild man. You know him from such movies as Green Room, where he is a straight-up neo-Nazi. Nice. Fucking dude can act. He can go from... Yeah, those aren't
Starting point is 00:01:43 his real views no but this dude goes from intense drama to hard comedy one of the funniest guys oh yeah he's one of those guys both of these guys are that you would recognize these guys 100 steve was my intern manager at the improv olympic where we used to do improv and that's where we basically know each other through and he did not like me when i he was my intern manager because I wore a puka-shelled necklace and he thought I was hot shit. Yeah. But we eventually became friends one day when we over-edibled and we got into it.
Starting point is 00:02:12 He also didn't like me at first because he said... He's a judgy little man. He goes, you know, you reminded me of some like overconfident Greek guy. Yeah, he didn't like my confidence. By the way, come on. He ain't wrong. And he's like, what does this guy think he has't like my confidence by the way come on he ain't right he's like he's like what does this guy think he has that other he's doing this little greek son of a bitch yeah he didn't like because of a bookish old necklace we shouldn't have it but here's the beauty of bird
Starting point is 00:02:35 that attitude we're so serious and judgmental within a 30 seconds he's like this guy is sweet as can be it's funny i love the g culture. Because he's the sweetest guy. But then he'll also be like, I don't like that guy. Yeah. I know you're going to change very quickly. And he goes, and I have. And the way he talks about how he talked to someone, he'll be like, I told that guy, get out of my way. I'm furious.
Starting point is 00:02:56 What did you actually say to him? I said, say to me, you're a good man. Thank you so much for the opportunity for you to step on my toes. So anyway. These guys are killers. So great, great episode uh i also want to say thank you to everybody who tuned in to self-reliance this weekend on hulu uh gareth has helped a lot with the push the show has helped a lot with the push everybody from the cast who
Starting point is 00:03:18 came on i appreciate all of you guys everybody who's watched i appreciate you it means a lot and thank you yeah and tell people i mean like we ask you to do with the show with with self-reliance keep keep it going and then to go to our show we're here to help for a second i just want to say uh the day we're recording this which is thursday the andy sandberg steve berg first episode we are having our biggest day ever on the podcast so thank you guys for listening we really love doing this uh we've both been really shocked and surprised how many people have come with us this early uh so thank you we're listening to the comments we're in a studio we're on youtube too if you want to watch video of us do this it's quite dynamic and so we're shirtless i'm just feeling a lot of gratitude
Starting point is 00:04:01 and i love you gareth oh boy this is jake's been drinking but jake without further ado hi hello how you doing great energy i'm good how are you doing great can we start can i get your name please yeah uh my name is lance lance and lance where are you calling yeah i'm calling I'm calling from beautiful Southern California here. Okay, we're in Southern California. We're in Los Feliz at the moment. Kind of like around the Burbank-Chatsworth area. Respect, respect. Oh, Chatsworth.
Starting point is 00:04:37 And Lance, about how old are you? What's your age so we can kind of judge you a little bit? Yeah, absolutely. I'm 33. Oh, real quick, This is inside baseball. Burbank is so far from Chatsworth. It is. It doesn't seem.
Starting point is 00:04:48 What do you mean Burbank Chatsworth area? It's already. Already. Here's an indicator, friend. No, no, no. Chatsworth. Where are you located? My family.
Starting point is 00:04:57 I'm located in the Chatsworth area. My mind just says Burbank Chatsworth because some of my family lives in Burbank. Can I suggest that the reason why you say Burbank Chatsworth is because if you say Chatsworth, people just go, oh, well, they make porn. Yeah, porn or a militia, right? That's why you do it, right? Yeah, but do you have a manifesto, Lance? You're trying to make people go like, oh,
Starting point is 00:05:16 near Warner Brothers and where they make porn. Yeah. Like Warner Brothers and Bang Brothers. Thank you, Garrett. Thank you. All right, Lance. What can we do for you today, sir? Okay. So basically the story is I recently,
Starting point is 00:05:31 ever since I was young, I've been into magic practice ever since I was little. Recently, I kind of stumbled into a couple of like legit gigs just from kind of like clowning around and doing it to some people.
Starting point is 00:05:43 And it's been going well. Like people seem really, I think I'm a little bit better than I it to some people. And it's been going well. People seem really I think I'm a little bit better than I gave myself credit for and it's great. The issue that I started having though is that the form of magic that I do is more akin to like mentalism.
Starting point is 00:05:57 Not like typical magic. And this has resulted in me getting kind of cornered after something by some people who are very, very convinced that what I am doing is 100% real. And will then kind of like rant at me with some really crazy stuff of their own. And I'm one of those people where I'm kind of too polite. I can't really like get out of the conversation. And I'm not, I'm not really sure how to deal with these people because if I refute the craziness that they're shooting me, I'm kind of refuting your own craziness as a mentalist. Yeah. So let me kind of
Starting point is 00:06:38 paraphrase and see if I know where we're at. You're a magic man. You, you do legit gigs. You do not do sleight of hand magic. You do mentalism. And mentalism is basically you say to a group of people, think of a number. I know what number you're thinking. And you've got ways and tricks to get to that number, correct? Yes. Absolutely. Can you do any mentalism right now on one of us so that we can see what you do or does it not work? Yep. But Lance, does that work or does that not work? It's very difficult to do over the phone. I'm going to just break through. It won't work.
Starting point is 00:07:15 Right. Hold on. Say that again, Lance. Spoiler. It's not going to happen. I have some stuff I could maybe pull off, but it'd be very difficult to do over the phone that's a long way of saying no hold on for a man who was healing people at a 7-eleven as well as a man who uses turquoise and has told me you should rub it on your body it works but
Starting point is 00:07:38 i've done the work today's just day one of doing the work with lance so lance what i'm hearing for you in the subtext you're incredible at your job. You're so incredible. People corner you for hours. And how old a man are you, Lance? 33. 33. Okay, 33 years old.
Starting point is 00:07:52 Time to learn a little thing called boundaries, friend. Yeah. But, like, this problem, I'm like, I'm so good at my job, people are cornering me forever. Are you just calling into the show to promote yourself? Like, is there a website or Instagram or something? Hold on, Lance. Hold on.
Starting point is 00:08:09 And I can only say this because I love Eric. Hold on lance and i've known this for so long easa we are on lance's team we need a bad all right i'm on your team bad this is a bad lieutenant and we're like paper boys he's gonna kill lance i'm sorry columbro go ahead go right ahead and so lance is there anything is there anything you could do over the phone so that we and the audience is a little bit on your team with the magic um let me let me think so much it relies upon me having reveal on hand um i i can try something really fast I've never tried this over the phone before. Okay. And if you get, hey, by the way, if you get it wrong, Eric's going to be abusive, but Gareth and I are going to try to be on your team. That's it. That's it. So don't be discouraged at all. But Eric is going to be your subject. Lance, take over. And I'll tell you what,
Starting point is 00:09:01 Kevin the Honk, Gareth and I are really hoping this works. Okay. Let's, let's try this here. So, um, first of all, do you guys have, um, there's one of you have like your phone on you really fast. Yeah, I do. And I'm rooting for your friend. Atta boy. Okay, perfect. So here's, here's what I want to do is, so, uh, have you ever been, uh, there's, there's a website that's like affiliated with google uh that kind of like lists um basically uh sort of everything that people have searched for recently uh it's just google and then hyphen staff.com uh it's literally just part of google
Starting point is 00:09:36 can you build it really fast and just google and then hyphen and staff.com what i love about this already is that eric's naysaying has led to us potentially going through his Google search. No, no, I'm absolutely terrified. I made my bed. Okay, what is it, Lance? But this ain't good. Okay, so it should be like... Bigger ladies.
Starting point is 00:09:55 How weird did I get last night? Oh, if you can get him to reveal his history, what he looked at to help him sleep last night. I will die last night. I was trying to help my friend's stepmother. That's what that was. Okay, so there should be, if you scroll down to the bottom, there should be a couple
Starting point is 00:10:19 of cities and whatnot, yeah? I don't see, okay, cities. I just clicked on cities. Yeah. Okay, so here's what I want you to do. I'm so scared. What I want you to do really fast is don't do anything just yet.
Starting point is 00:10:31 I want to kind of unlock something in your mind, right? So what I want you to do, I want you to just, in your mind, visualize as many cities around the world as you can picture in your head rapid fire. So like somebody has a flip book and they're kind of, you know, like pulling the page and the flip book really fast.
Starting point is 00:10:46 You're just seeing city after city after city. Does that make sense? Yes, sir. And really visualize that as much as you can. Iconic details, landmarks, whatever, you know, pops in your head. Once you've kind of gotten a hold of that and flip through everything. Okay. I got like three or four cities I'm flipping through. Okay. So here's what I want you to do. What I want you to do now is I want you to
Starting point is 00:11:05 concentrate on the city of, let's say Miami, okay? Okay. So what I want you to do, on the website, I don't want you to pay attention. I just want you to scroll down to the bottom of the page as fast as you absolutely can without really looking anything over. Just subconsciously take
Starting point is 00:11:22 it all in. Okay. Okay. I'm at the bottom now yeah okay perfect now what i want you to do is if you had to pick a number between one and a hundred that you think that miami would fit it into just on instinct don't think too hard what's the first number between one and a hundred that you would think of that you should he say it out loud or give us the fingers yeah yeah that's fine 77 77 so here's what i've done right what i want you to do is you can take in more information than your brain than you think you're capable of taking in you can subconsciously register things on a level that you've never done before.
Starting point is 00:12:06 And so what I want you to do, you just said 77, you were thinking of Miami, you scrolled through this list really fast. I now want you to go back up and see what is the 77th most Googled city right now. Whoa! Lance,
Starting point is 00:12:22 I am humble. I am sorry. I believe. I'm looking right now, Miami am humble. I am sorry. I believe. Let me see. I'm looking right now. Miami 77. Show the camera. Show the camera. So, Lance, what are you doing?
Starting point is 00:12:32 Oh, my God. All right, Lance. Miami 77. Wait, show the camera. And, Lance, really fast, because you came on here and you just killed it. What is your first and last name, your Instagram? Where can people find you really fast? We're going to promote you a little bit.
Starting point is 00:12:44 I got chills, Lance. I'll be honest. I was actually using a fake name just in case I did say anything that had a magical to welcome after. Lance, you just, you blew my buddy's mind. You blew all of our minds. What is your thing? How people can find a mentalist? And then we're going to give you advice.
Starting point is 00:13:01 Oh, well, thank you. I'm brand new at this, so my socials aren't really too active. My real name is Jake Price. Jake Price? I'm Jake Price Nose Things all run together at Instagram. There's, like, nothing on there. Okay, all good.
Starting point is 00:13:17 Hey, Jake, you're starting. Everybody look him up on Jake Price Nose Things. Yeah, everybody start somewhere. Jake and I met in a bachelor apartment. Now he's got syndication money. The Price is right. Jake Price. Yeah, everybody starts somewhere. Jake and I met in a bachelor apartment. Now he's got syndication money. The price is right. Jake Price. We're fans, friends.
Starting point is 00:13:29 So, Jake, now, by the way, way to come in here. Eric was gunning. He was trying to knock you down. You spun him. He did the Eric. Oh! Now, really fast. I'm humbled.
Starting point is 00:13:41 I'm humbled. Eric, really quickly now to Jake Price. He's in a situation where now you see it. I see humbled. Eric, really quickly now to Jake Price. He's in a situation where now you see it. I see it. I feel like an ass. And his fans are coming at him pretty intensely. Yeah. So can you, as David Lynch, the great director,
Starting point is 00:14:00 give him a little bit of advice of how he can keep distance between his fans trying to tell them their crazy stuff so that Jake Price can do what he does, ando, because you got a gift here, pal. You got a real gift, and you got personality and spunk, and the world is going to know the name Jake Price. But what you have to do, buddy, is figure out these boundaries for yourself because this incredible energy that you're putting forth in your mentalism, the best way to get that drained is an unboundaried weirdo after a show. You just tell them I'm not part of any secret MKUltra project. I was born to humble, good people in Chatsworth, Burbank,
Starting point is 00:14:57 which I'm giving you now because you blew my mind. Hey, Eric, now can you give Jake Price some advice from the great basketball coach, Mr. Bill Walton? Now look here, Lance. What you've done today has absolutely blown us away. This is it. This is Jerry Garcia. This is Neil Young. This is
Starting point is 00:15:15 Bob Dylan, rough and rowdy ways. But you have to rein in the energy. Look, I watched Larry Bird tell off person after person in airports because he needed his energy for himself. How was he going to drop triple-doubles if he let every unbounded soul unburden their mental illness upon him? Lance, you got this.
Starting point is 00:15:37 Throw it down, big man. Jake Price. Last but not least, Eric, will you tell Jake Price Knows Things what he should do as the one and only Elvis Presley, the king, baby? I'll tell you, Lance, I came in here. It's a comedy podcast, man. I came in here doubting and shooting and hoping for some editing, and you blew my mind, man. So I'm telling you right now, man, however you choose to see god is this allah or buddha or jesus i agree with you man but what you need to do right now is summon this power man because these people
Starting point is 00:16:13 are going to try to tear you down jake price man you might be a goddamn chosen one like me all right i'm gonna say one more thing embrace religion. Don't get left out of heaven on a technicality, my friend, because you've got the goods, man. Miami. So, Gareth, those were three. So, by the way, you just had some great advice from three different great figures. They're all kind of the same idea, and that is you've got a gift, Lance. You're talented at what you do.
Starting point is 00:16:40 You just need boundaries. Garf, are we missing anything here? Because I'm kind of with Walt and King. Listen, of course I'm with the trifecta there uh and I I think yeah I think it's really you're new to it that's the real issue is that you're not used you feel like you're going to be letting people down if you're not doing a show after your show but to what Eric is suggesting you cannot pour from an empty cup Lance so. So you've got to just you've got to find a way to just be done when you're done. The show is over. If someone corners you or if someone wants to have this sidebar, you just need to say something like I'm too exhausted.
Starting point is 00:17:17 Like these shows exhaust me and I have another show tomorrow. I don't have time and not feel like that is rude. Sometimes people will. I'm sure all of us have been in the situation where someone thinks because you're not giving the effort one on one that they want from you, that you are disappointing them. But you're in the right. And I would just you know, you need to have your energy. So so, Lance, well, I think we're all on the same page here and that is keep doing you man you're kind of killing it uh we expect big things from you that was shocking yeah i'm not gonna lie we kind of set you up there to mess oh yeah i thought i really in
Starting point is 00:17:56 my head i was like we're not gonna use no and then i thought you know i was kind of just doing it to fuck with eric a little bit because he came in hot. And the Google was perfect. And also, I've never seen so many stills of busty maids when I looked at the phone. A researcher. I was doing my own research. Alright, Eric. No, Jake let me off the hook. I thought it was going to be conspiracy theories and stepmom stuff getting revealed.
Starting point is 00:18:17 The stepmoms come up a couple of times, which makes me feel like that's the real deal. It's stepmom stuff. That's a bit. I swear I'm not into stepmoms. Tons of other weird stuff. I just read it. That's the real deal it's stepmom stuff that's a bit i swear i'm not a stepmom tons of other weird stuff i just read it that's the number one thing well but also both of you i've been up to you in public you both have a way of making people to come up to you feel great in a very brief way like jake you're wonderful to people but it's brief yeah and you give people what they need and i think you are a thing I'd say Jake keep it moving keep your body moving
Starting point is 00:18:45 if you're moving just act like there's this hidden force which clearly you're in touch with propelling you along and don't get cornered by people well you know what also actually helps is a lot of times like if I'm at a club like I don't know what the setup is for where you're doing these shows
Starting point is 00:19:01 but it's very good like if you need to give someone like Eric saying like 30 seconds, it's always helpful to have someone there pulling you away. I think that's right. Yeah. So in closing here, Jake, we gave you some, I would say some pretty solid advice. Where are you kind of at?
Starting point is 00:19:19 What have you taken from this? You probably knew what we were going to say. Yeah. You're reading all of our brains, but take us out of here, Jake. Where are you kind of at? No, I agree. I really appreciate it. I like the mantra too of keep moving, act like I'm busy, act like I got places to
Starting point is 00:19:31 be sort of thing. I like that idea of stopping, giving somebody 30 seconds of my time, and then just setting that boundary, which is yeah, and I really thank you guys so much. I think you really hit the nail on the head here. Big Tarman is a booster too, so thank you for that. You know, another real quick good one is to go when someone's in the midst of that.
Starting point is 00:19:51 Oh, okay, yeah. Well, hey, let's get a picture. Have them take a quick picture, then you're out of there. That feels like a punctuation to the interaction. Yeah, and eventually they'll have a handler. And hilariously, they have us when David Lynch does events. We go down in character, and he interacts with us in character because it makes him happier.
Starting point is 00:20:08 So he'll come to me, detective, how's your mother? I'm like, oh, you know, we had a big dinner on Sunday, and you know what happened? What? Another murder. Oh, my gosh, and you had to go? Yeah, we did. So have a way when you're out to make things more fun
Starting point is 00:20:23 because that's what they do with us. And eventually, very soon, because you're a shooting star on the Uprise, you'll be able to have somebody with you that can kind of help move things along with love. And then, King, take us out of here with one last thing as Elvis. And then at the end, tell him to get the hell off. And that's going to be the end of our call. All right, Jake Price. He's the future, man.
Starting point is 00:20:39 I'm deeply invested in him. I'm going to come over and mentor him. And that is that for that call. But we'll never forget Miami 77, man. Could I have a little pill? Thank you, Jake. Wow. I said thank you guys so much. Today's episode is brought to you by Babbel. That's right, Jake. Listen, you know what Babbel is, right? Science-backed language learning app that actually works,
Starting point is 00:21:11 which I find to be very important. Science-backed, Jake. Listen, don't bother paying hundreds of dollars for a private tutor. They come over. They're, like, asking for snacks. They're being annoying. Or even waste hours on apps that don't really help. We're here to help, and Babbel is going to help you.
Starting point is 00:21:26 Babbel's tips and tools are approachable, accessible, rooted in real-life situations. So, Jake, for instance, if you want to learn, I started relearning French through Babbel a little bit. Yes, because I used to know French, but then I don't know French. But it's still there. You know what I like about it is that it's got a speech recognition technology. Yep. Because the problem with learning a new language is if you sound like you're from another country. Yes.
Starting point is 00:21:54 If it can actually help with the accent. Yeah. That's a big ass turn. And applicable to situations you're going to find yourself in. Like when I think back to taking French, it was just like so much of much it was like i'm never going to do that like how do you order food how do you get a drink how do you ask for directions but so babble's great now listen listen everybody should we bring him in right one quick pause should we bring in the clothes studies from yale this is interesting michigan state university and others prove that babble is better
Starting point is 00:22:21 so one study found that using Babbel for 15 hours is equivalent to a full semester at college. So if that's true, which Yale's no joke, it's just putting schooling in a different light. Yes. If you spend 15 hours, let's say you didn't go to college and you always feel like,
Starting point is 00:22:41 well, I don't know, I didn't go to college. 15 hours, you just did a semester. Yeah. wild yes yes that's a wild study so speaking of language should we bring in the closer or should i do it closer all right hold on let's get him kevin doors open oh you meant gill yeah i meant kevin what kevin was gonna do it no i thought we were talking about the closer the we were talking about the closer. We were. He parked in front of all our cars, so might as well. Oh, we can't leave?
Starting point is 00:23:10 Well, what's the problem? Go ahead. So that old jalopy is Gil's? Yes. And you can turn it off, I guess. No, keep it running. It's bad for something. A lot of smoke. I'm pausing a serious XM.
Starting point is 00:23:22 Now, listen. Here's a special limited time deal for our listeners. Right now, get 55% off your Babbel subscription, but only for our listeners. This isn't for people who don't listen, like Laura from one of the calls earlier. These are standalone. At Babbel.com slash HTH. Jake, let me finish. Get 55% off Babbel.com slash HTH.
Starting point is 00:23:42 Spelled B-A-B-B-E-L dot com slash h-t-h we're gonna watch you to babble we want you to babble i'll tell you what i don't want to babble your ear off i gotta go back to the jalopy rules and restrictions this episode is brought to you by zocDoc. ZocDoc is a free app and website where you can search and compare highly rated in-network doctors near you and instantly book appointments with them online. Garf, what does that mean to you? Well, it means a lot because, as you know, my mother was in town for a while. She had a hip replacement, and it was crazy it was a crazy situation and there were so many times so many things like complications were popping up and
Starting point is 00:24:32 there were multiple times where we wanted to find a doctor appointment quickly somewhere close you use that doc yeah you would use that doc because it's just so much harder if you're just like you know like using search engines to try to find someone and then you call do they take your insurance the problem has it's all there for all the problem with also just searching it is all the ads pop up yes and what i like i actually use zocdoc we since we started doing it i do like that it keeps it really clean and you could put all your information in yeah did you use zocdoc for your knee i did use zocdoc for my knee which i am going to get an mri on uh but we don't think it's a tear that's the
Starting point is 00:25:10 good news but i am going to get an mri oh the doctor report back it's just an old man's knee it's actually pretty much what it sounded like doctor said to me about my hips i'm getting to the point where it's sad when doctors are just like yeah you're just the i've had a doctor who looked at my body and then went like this. Well, you're mid-40s, yeah? Ugh, what a jerk. Well, that guy's hopefully not on ZocDoc, but again, it really does. It filters specifically
Starting point is 00:25:33 for doctors that take your insurance located near you, treat basically, and again, you can get an appointment quickly. You can also get it same day. That's absolutely right, Jake, if you're lucky. That's right, Gil Buchanan 1s and 2s, 68 balmy. Don't worry about it. That's right. I've been kept in the closet for a while on this show, but I'm back for the ads.
Starting point is 00:25:50 Good to see you, brother. You never, literally never left. Wherever the best time in the world, go to ZocDoc.com slash HTH and download the ZocDoc app for free. Did you hear, how much does that cost you? Free! Free, that's right! And then find and book a top rated doctor today.
Starting point is 00:26:06 That's Z-O-C-D-O-C dot com slash H-T-H. ZocDoc.com slash H-T-H. Hello. How's it going, man? Welcome to the show. We're here to help. We're going to help you, okay? No matter what.
Starting point is 00:26:26 Took a weird turn, I can tell by Jake's face. Jake and I are wearing the same outfit. He likes to dress like me now. It's a little unnerving. Can we get your name, please? Yeah, my name is Jake Johnson. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. This is too much.
Starting point is 00:26:40 Jake, make the sign. Wait, hold on. Here's my sign. I got a guy who has my name and i gotta go dresses like me today ain't great hey hey jake my guy what are you dressed like right now are you wearing a blue button-down and jeans oh i'm not white shoes i'm wearing a t-shirt and a short here's something here's something dorky jake uh so i always start but i write the notes as i go because i don't have a great memory.
Starting point is 00:27:07 And I was about to write Jake Johnson. I think I can remember your name. How about this? You wrote Jake. Jake had crossed it out. I was like, I think I got that. Where are you from, Jake? I'm from Minnesota. Is your name really Jake Johnson?
Starting point is 00:27:18 It is. Okay. Where in Minnesota? Minneapolis. Great city. You a Vikings fan? Great town. I'm not a Vikings fan? Great town. I'm not a Vikings fan.
Starting point is 00:27:27 Great person. Great man. Great guy. A Minnesota Jake Johnson who likes the Packers. It's like you were created in a lab. This is kind of like Gareth's dream guy. Yeah, this is the guy I want to do the podcast with. Jake Johnson. Jake Johnson, the Packers fan. dream guy yeah this is this is this is how i this is the guy i want to do the podcast with jake johnson jake johnson uh and so jake johnson from minnesota how old are you i'd say i'd say
Starting point is 00:27:51 yeah i was gonna say 28 and i'm gonna tell you why i'm 45 there weren't a lot of jakes at my age but at about when about when i was about 8 to 10 they started what yeah not a lot of jake when i was growing up there were no jakes growing up and then then at around 10, a lot of baby Jakes. I think when I was born, Jake was the most popular name. Well, you got guys like Jake Johnson. My mother is similar to me. We are braggers, and she likes to take credit for bringing that name back. I don't know if it's accurate. Yeah, I can see that.
Starting point is 00:28:19 All right, Jake, so you're about 26. You're from Minnesota. You got a great name. What can we do for you? about 26. You're from Minnesota. You got a great name. What can we do for you? Great team. Well, my girlfriend and I are huge New Girl fans, and we often listen to this podcast together. Oh, thanks.
Starting point is 00:28:36 Well, from Gareth, thank you for New Girl, and from me, thank you for the podcast. Yeah, yeah. I really appreciate it. We love making the show, and we love when it hits. And we love making the podcast. We love the podcast, too. But yeah, the show was a lot of fun. Okay. Quit acting it. We love making the show, and we love when it hits. And we love making the podcast. We love the podcast, too. But yeah, the show was a lot of fun.
Starting point is 00:28:47 Okay. Quit acting like you're part of the show, Jake. Come on. Well, the reason why we started dating is because their Tinder profile said that she was a huge New Girl fan. She had a Nick Miller quote. And I used that as a way to talk to her by saying, hey, I'm Jake Johnson. I play Nick Miller in the show, jokingly, of course.
Starting point is 00:29:10 And we hit it off. And here we are three years later, still in love. All right. So you guys connected through New Girl. You used the name and the bit to form the connection, Smart Play. No bad blood there. You guys have been together for three years i'm not seeing a problem oh my king are you the garf no nothing so far smooth sailing
Starting point is 00:29:31 what i need from you guys is to assist me in crafting a memorable proposal to my girlfriend tough a lot of pressure. Do you know when you're going to propose? Well, I was thinking since we listen to this podcast a lot and we often listen to it together. Are you proposing
Starting point is 00:29:58 to us that you do the proposal live on this podcast and when this podcast airs, you'll listen to it together and she'll then know? Or are you proposing having her on or are you going to do it and then have her listen to it i think since we listen to the show so much together i think you want to wait i like the idea i like the idea oh you know what then i got a special surprise for you too because we've got a guy who i know who's got a beautiful singing voice uh he's got the voice of an angel who i think could help a little bit kevin you want to bring
Starting point is 00:30:30 him in a little bit he's a friend of me and gareth what and he's got a wonderful god what our friend steve bird who also played cheese on New Girl. Sit down, sit down, sit down, my friend. Watch the microphone. I feel kind of good. Oh, my God. All denim. It's nice to have some more denim in the room. Well, now that he lives in Nebraska, he's denim on top of the top.
Starting point is 00:30:55 Denim cowboy. Yeah. Wow. Wow, nice shoes. Don't. Really quickly, before you gals start gabbing. Wow. And we're going to catch this guy up to where we're at.
Starting point is 00:31:04 Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're on the phone. What is he hiding in a broom closet while bobon was here we wanted to surprise you you did it's in the private jet here so so jake i'm gonna catch you up and i'm gonna catch everybody up in audio uh one of uh gareth and i best friend in the whole world mr steven berg Friend of show. From the podcast that we're asking you guys to all check out called High Strangers. Steve, really quickly, give a quick pitch of what High Strangers is. Well, I love weird topics like UFOs, the paranormal, cryptozoology, and I talk with the leading experts in this field, and I'm passionate about it.
Starting point is 00:31:40 And let me tell you something. It's all real. When was the last time you hit that uh one hitter about 60 minutes ago and it is wearing off and i need another dose and so because i'm telling too much truth right now so clearly we decided uh our friend steve came in town and we decided rather than just tell gareth he was here we were going to surprise him on the show crazy and so steve you are now caught up we are talking to a guy named Jake Johnson. For real?
Starting point is 00:32:08 For real. Yeah. He's 26 years old. He's from Minnesota. Love Minnesota. Likes the Packers. He likes the Packers. He wants to propose to his girlfriend.
Starting point is 00:32:18 Yeah. But the way he wants to do it is on this show right now. Then he wants to save it and listen with her when we air it and then so that time when they air it that'll be how she hears so it's our job to help him come up with a beautiful pitch proposal but but okay here's the thing right if just if we're gonna air this as a first of all it's insane first of all it's insane that you're all in denim uh and it's insane it's insane that you're all in denim. And it's insane that you're here.
Starting point is 00:32:48 It's also insane that you're dressed like me. Stop it. I'm dressed cool. Chicken or the egg. You guys look like you're from Urban Outfitters. Stop it. Part of me actually is. It's insane. Alright, keep going. It's easy close. I look like I rode here on my motorcycle.
Starting point is 00:33:04 Cool customer. Looks like you ate a chocolate man. I look like I rode here on my motorcycle. Yeah. Cool customer. Looks like you ate a chocolate motorcycle. I did as I was riding my real motorcycle. Good God. You did. With friends like these. Eating a chocolate motorcycle is pretty good. We would air this as a call.
Starting point is 00:33:18 So probably his girlfriend by now has figured out that a proposal is coming, which I actually think is okay. Like right now they could be sitting here listening to this call. Or, or, or. We start it. Jake. Yeah. So here's what you might have to do. You might have to find a way to not let her listen until this point.
Starting point is 00:33:39 What do you think, Jake? So do you understand? Did you hear Gareth's kind of issue there? And that is as soon as she starts hearing this. She's going to hear Jake Johnson. She's going to know you're on the show. But once you do this setup and you say what you want to do, she's going to freak out. So there could be a way.
Starting point is 00:33:54 And you got to tell us how your relationship works. Is there when you guys are listening together, whose phone is it? It's always mine. It is. Okay. Okay. So what you could do when you say you want to listen here's what we're going to do kevin will you replay the theme song oh great yeah no it would
Starting point is 00:34:12 be yeah well no there's an intro how do we do this no that's what we could do right now you can play the intro okay and then we just start the call right yes yeah or we just take the call yeah because we do that the transitionary Yep. So do that transitionary thing. We're going to start the call right now, but before we do this actually, cause this is all pre what's your fiance's name? Emily. Emily. Okay.
Starting point is 00:34:35 Jake, let's have a moment and figure out what you're going to do to propose. Okay. Okay. Can you tell us a little bit about your relationship? We are both like major foodies, so we love going to different places to eat in our area. We love traveling, living in countries and cities. Okay. Both huge animal lovers.
Starting point is 00:34:57 Hold on. Hold on. Jake, I have a big idea. Jake, I got a big idea. Yep. I think we do this. We do the transitionary music and stay with me on this one. Jake, tell me if you like it. We pretend Steve Berg is the caller. We go, Hey, who's this?
Starting point is 00:35:13 You go, my name is Steve Berg. You go, I want to, I want to propose to my wife, my fiance. I don't know how to do it. Her name is Emily. You do the whole thing. Then at a certain point, we stop and go, now we're going to take a pause. Jake Johnson in Minnesota. Is there anything that you want to say to your dear fiance, Emily? You say out loud, yes, there is. We'll go, then do it. Her head will explode. Yeah, that's pretty massive.
Starting point is 00:35:43 Then you jump in after it and we will all congratulate you i like it i got a counter pitch do it we just when we're ready we start and jake johnson in minnesota is saying to emily i've got a new podcast i want you to listen to it's high strangeness oh yeah we start steve with a little weird kind of talk interest and then we jump in and say you're actually not listening to high strangeness. You're listening to we're here to help. And this is a special message to Jake Johnson and Emily in Minnesota. No, from Jake Johnson.
Starting point is 00:36:14 From Jake Johnson. And then he could jump in and say, hi, Emily, I'm sure it's pretty weird for you listening to me on we're here to help. But there's something I want to say to you. And then you propose to her on the show. And we all go, that's amazing. Stop. Everybody likes it. This is a 4.8 on the
Starting point is 00:36:30 spice level. Yeah, but in like 15 minutes if we didn't stop him, he'd be going like, this is gonna happen and then I'm eating spaghetti for dinner. Shut up. Look, the people that we hear to help us are gonna love that. Trust me. So, Jake, right now we've got two songs. Here's the third one.
Starting point is 00:36:49 Steve Berg is going to improvise a little song and then you're just going to do that. So right now you have three options. You've got the, we set it up. Steve is the fake caller on we're here to help. Two, we pretend this is a different podcast you really like called High Strangeness, which is a real podcast. Then we can get his actual music or we'll do a transition in. He starts it. Then after his setup, he says he's here with Jake Johnson and Gareth Reynolds from We're Here to Help. She'll go, oh, that's why.
Starting point is 00:37:13 Then we'll find a natural transition to say to the Jake Johnson. Third is you just make up a singing song and then something else happens. Where are you at, Jake Johnson? He make a song or him make a song? You make it up. I can do that. Give us a taste. I'm singing song and then something else happens. Where are you at, Jake Johnson? He make a song or him make a song? You make it up. I can do that. Give us a taste. I'm a song and dance man.
Starting point is 00:37:30 Sitting in the corner, wondering to myself, are crop circles real or am I fooling myself? It's not about the UFOs. It's about a human proposing. Oh, okay. First of all, I like that it's not crop circles, but I like anyone who rhymes myself with myself. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:37:48 No, Steve, respect. This is your Jake Johnson proposing to Emily. Oh, yeah, okay. Go ahead. My name is Jake. I'm part Norwegian. I love a lady named Emily. She's wonderful.
Starting point is 00:38:01 She is great. She's a foodie. We went on a date and we fell in love oh we fell in love sometimes we go to europe maybe we'll try a fun gyro sometimes we'll go to tokyo and have okay so it was a you cut it off on food right at the perfect time not because they're food halfway through ramen because he's hungry yes but he was about to get more into so jake uh in minnesota where are you at man what do you what do you want to do now let's get back to you you're the star as much as i love advice from another jake johnson which i really appreciate
Starting point is 00:38:39 i think gareth is on to something i do too. I'd like to explore that idea. Okay. So then tell us how you would like to do it. That would work the best for your actual relationship. Do you want to start with Steve talking about high strangeness? And then he introduces Gareth and I, and then we had a certain weird point say, there's a guy named Jake Johnson. If you want, Oh,
Starting point is 00:39:02 you want to talk about high strangeness? Here's some high strangers. There's a guy in Jake Johnson. If you want, Oh, you want to talk about high strangeness? Here's some high strangers. There's a guy in Jake Johnson in Minnesota right now, sitting with his fiance, Emily, and he's got something he wants to say. Then we all take a pause and then you jump in. How does that sound? No, that's pretty good. I like that a lot. She'll not expect that. So Jake, this is your life, right? We're doing bits. Is this how you want to propose to Emily? I think it is. And don't just do what you think we want. Is this what you... Because if you
Starting point is 00:39:30 like it, I'm fired up. I think it's a great idea. If you guys would allow me to give a little something from the heart and... Do you know what you want to say? Yes. Do you know what you want to say, Jake? I kind of have something prepared. Great. Okay, great. So what we'll do is we'll jump into the high strangeness. Steve, yes do you know what you want to say jake i kind of have something prepared all right okay okay
Starting point is 00:39:45 great so what we'll do is we'll jump into the high strangeness steve you'll start you'll say we're your guests yeah you go first okay when it goes to me my story pretty quick yes we'll stop yeah we'll say this is actually an episode of we're here to help okay why why do we need that turn because that's for her that's so's like, what the fuck's going on? The turn is that he's going to talk. Yes. Why don't you also talk about our sponsors? Well, I mean, you don't know if you want to get hard in 10 minutes, you take a mango
Starting point is 00:40:15 RX. Hold on. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1.
Starting point is 00:40:17 It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1.
Starting point is 00:40:18 It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1.
Starting point is 00:40:19 It's A-1. It's A-1. It's A-1. Bring in Gil fucking Buchanan. I couldn't be more excited for you. No, Garrett. I'll tell you what. Alice and I have been on the rocks many times. 68 and Balmy.
Starting point is 00:40:28 68 and Balmy. That's not just my age and demeanor. No, what we're going to do, Garf, that keeps it simple, is he brings up high strangeness. You say something strange that happened. You say, do you have anything strange, Jake? I say, yes. I talk about the same name. And then I'll say, hey, Jake,
Starting point is 00:40:46 you got anything you want to say? Then you do your pitch. All right, great. I mean, I do feel like you walked on the set of my movie and took the script out of my hands, but okay. Okay, Gareth, what do you want to do, honey? I like it. I like it. You like that Jake Johnson from Minnesota? Yeah, I think
Starting point is 00:41:01 we're on the right track here. So I'll just tee it up like it's the beginning of my podcast and introduce you guys. You'll take it from right track here. So I'll just tee it up like it's the beginning of my podcast and introduce you guys. And then you'll take it from there. Say something. I'll throw to Jake. Jake will throw to Jake. Jake will throw to Emily.
Starting point is 00:41:11 And then after the thing, we'll react. And then Jake, we're going to get off after that. This is really beautiful. Yeah, he means we're going to leave the call. That's what he means, not me necessarily. Jake and Emily, when you listen to all this after, I'm sorry about that. I promise you both, I'm not going to masturbate about the proposal. Unless it goes super, super great.
Starting point is 00:41:34 It depends. It's a lot of pressure for Jake Johnson, Minnesota. Okay, so why don't we start, Steve? Why don't you start your show? Whenever you're ready, I'm ready. Yeah, and then what you'll do in reality, Jake, is you'll have it paused, and you'll say, I want to play you a new podcast, and you'll start it right here. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:47 Okay. Hey, friends. Welcome back to another episode of High Strangeness. Tonight, I have two of my best friends in the entire world, two guys who you probably wouldn't expect to be on a show like this talking about the weird, but my friends are Gareth Reynolds and Jake Johnson, straight from Hollywood, California. Fellas, how you doing today? Hey, Steve.
Starting point is 00:42:07 Thanks for having us, man. Denim on the top and the bottom. Absolutely. Absolutely. Always denim all the time over at Berg HQ. Guys, it's weird because a lot of people wouldn't realize this, but Gareth, you at a young age started having alien, I mean, this sounds weird to say, alien abductions. It does sound weird to say.
Starting point is 00:42:24 Is this real? It's even weirder to go through yeah yeah yes yeah um yeah as a kid uh i used to actually go to uh right on lake michigan we used to go down there and watch the fireworks every july 4th right and uh one year after the fireworks were done we thought that uh we thought that we thought one of the fireworks had kind of uh gone awry way. And we sort of saw what we thought was a flying saucer. And it stuck with me my whole life. But I don't want to eat up too much of the air time. But we can get back into that.
Starting point is 00:42:52 But I'm sure that a Hollywood star who really is gracious and understanding to other people's time, Jake Johnson has something, too. Oh, thanks so much. Yeah, I've had a lot of strangers. I know you have. The ghost in your old house by the staircase? We're not going to get into that right now obviously this is all true folks i know well sorry i didn't know what you wanted to talk about or not the chandelier that talked to you well i
Starting point is 00:43:12 was actually trying to take the lead obviously well go ahead jake you don't have to talk necessarily i mean whatever you want to talk about jake well because the thing that i want to talk about is not the ghost near your stairs or the talking chandelier that didn't happen the thing that i would like to talk about that I find very strange is that obviously my name is Jake Johnson. Yeah. And there's another Jake Johnson from Minnesota who's 26 years old. I know it's really crazy.
Starting point is 00:43:38 And he's got a fiance named Emily. Not yet. And they've been together for three years. And that other Jake Johnson has something that he wants to say to Emily right now. So Jake Johnson, are you around? I am around. I'm right here. Well, the floor is yours, Jake. Hey, Emily, let's listen to Jake together. What do you say? My dearest Emily, as we celebrate another year of joy, laughter and adventures, I can't imagine my life without you. Let's continue our journey filled with love,
Starting point is 00:44:06 exploring new places, and savoring delicious food, while also shopping for treasures and welcoming a furry friend into our home. Will you make every day extraordinary and marry me? She said yes, probably! Yeah!
Starting point is 00:44:20 Woo! Alright! Hot dog and a half Song it up That is so great Wait what? Little song Emily you're beautiful I can't imagine spending a single moment without you
Starting point is 00:44:35 Just imagine the travels we'll do We will go to the moon Cause Elon's gonna make it possible We'll try some weird Emily and Jake Congratulations Romance is alive and well moon because elon's gonna make it possible we'll try some weird emily and jake congratulations romance is alive and well now we're gonna do an option two and that is she said no yeah oh yeah okay so yeah ah what's your deal hey you know what maybe it's better this way guys hey jake you come to la you me we'll go out on the town we'll find what
Starting point is 00:45:05 we're looking for there's plenty of emily's out here capisce hey steve you want to uh give us a sad song yeah close this off emily you've made the gravest mistake of your life you will be basically just so depressed deeply you'll never go go to Europe. You'll never try fun foods. And that furry friend, hey, that's going with Jake, not you. You blew it. You failed. Your life will amount
Starting point is 00:45:36 to nothing. All right. I went dark. Jake and Emily, congratulations to both of you. Jake, thank you for the call. We wish you guys a happy life together. Good luck, man. Let us know what happens.
Starting point is 00:45:48 Awesome. Thank you. Bye, guys. This has been amazing. Bye, buddy. We're Here to Help is hosted by Jake Johnson. And Gareth Reynolds. The show is produced and edited by Kevin Bartelt.
Starting point is 00:46:01 And the associate producer and editor is AJ McKean. Our social media director is Caitlin Tanwakio. and our video editor is John DeBruin. The theme song is made by Oliver Raleigh, and you can check out his music at oliverraleigh.com. That's Oliver R-A-L-L-I dot com. The album artwork is by James Fosdyke. You can find him on Instagram at James underscore Fosdyke, D-I-K-E. And if you'd like to see me do stand-up the road, go to GarethReynolds.com. And if you'd like to be on the show, email us your question at HelpfulPod at gmail.com. All of the advice given on We're Here
Starting point is 00:46:35 to Help is for entertainment purposes only and all listeners should be adults and make their own decisions. That was a hate gum podcast.

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