Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Baby-Break Clip Show #1
Episode Date: July 17, 2017Here is the first of our Baby-Break Clip Show episodes. Covering a wide variety of subjects and episodes, we delve into our back catalogue to bring you some hilarious jokes and bits while we are on ou...r hiatus. Give it a listen, share with friends, and thank you as always for all of your support!Â
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Hello, we tea's this is your friend Alan here with the first of our baby hiatus episodes.
This is a little best of greatest hits, things that were suggested to us from folks
that they thought was funny and stuff that I found funny
as well in going back and listening to these episodes.
Let me just quickly thank some folks who gave us some assistance in making this happen.
I would like to thank Jason, Mike, Sam, David, another Jason, Nicholas, Brian, Hunter, Lauren, Adrian, Katie, Cody, Eric Daniel,
Jean, Lindsay, Shannon, Jennifer, Stormy, Daniel,
you guys are all the best.
Thank you so much.
You can go to our Facebook and let us know what you think would be good in these,
funny little best of clip show episodes.
Probably be one or two more at least in the every other week that we're doing right now
while we are on baby hiatus.
And while you're thinking about that, I want you to send a positive vibes out into the
universe and wish Katie all the best with the baby and all of that stuff.
And we are very excited here
at Wearwolf Ambulance and we thank you guys so much for sticking around
sticking with us and we'll be back bringing you from new episodes shortly so
without any further ado let's get into this.
All right let's start this thing off with a classic that we reference often
the grabbers episode.
Where we go from sober sounding like this.
Hi, and welcome to another episode of WhereWFambulance.
I'm Katie.
I'm here with my friend Alan.
Hi, Alan.
Oh, you jump the gun.
We're not even drunk yet.
Hello, Katie.
How are you? I'm doing really well.
How are you? This is our pre-show show where we're sober.
Tonight we're going to do the film Gravers. There will be spoilers.
And after we record this we're going to go get drunk and watch Gravers and
hopefully not get eaten by tentacl beasts. Hopefully. Or something. So if this is the end of the podcast, I guess it happened.
I know that we loved you. Yeah. To this is the end of the podcast, I guess it happened. I know that we loved you.
Yeah.
To this.
T-Bas?
T-Bas was the best one, though.
Oh, wait, left-eye was the best one.
R-I-P.
T-Bos, like, she had that song about jerkin.
She was the song about deserved. Chili was weak shit. Chili was the one who was like just added.
She was just like...
She was no left eye.
No, she was no chili.
Although left eye only had...
Chili was just there to be pretty though, so it doesn't really matter.
Left eye.
And she said, Andre's house on fire their thigh.
And she said, And she said, Andrhy, That guy, he was cheating on her. I'm sure he was a piece of shit. Yeah. Ah, left eye.
Hi, I'm Alan and I'm here on wherewolf ambulance. This is why I don't drink, is it because when I drink I sound like this.
It's very disconcerting.
To this.
Takes it to Ruffle, Ruffle Toggi.
Ruffle. Roofled hoagie. Roofled hoagie.
Which with... I'm so sorry.
To this, it's just, it's ludicrous.
It's tiny little mouths like, mhm,
is that what a tiny mouse sounds like?
Kind of.
Yeah, no, I think you're right.
Yeah, me too. So yeah that's our ratings of grabbers. This movie
that we just loved what was it called? It was called Netflix Irish Monster Ocean Irish movie?
I don't drink so much anymore. No, there's a reason for that.
I gotta get an Uber home.
Oh yeah, yeah.
It's good thing you didn't have to fax them.
No.
You could just...
I don't know.
Teletype them?
I think so.
Here's some of our classic impressions.
I don't know.
You figure out we're doing. And come back for my Jody Foster impression. Do you want to just do it now and get it out of the way?
Nope. What a treat for us all. Dr. Lecter. There you go. There we go. I think you mean Dr. Lector.
Neither of those was that great guys. I got him. I nailed it. Dr. Lector. Did she not move her mouth? It's like she has a bit to th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the th thi thi thi the th th th th th th th th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to nailed it. I nailed it. Dr. Lector. Did
she not move her mouth? It's like she has a bit of honey in her mouth.
Dr. Lector. Yeah. Totally want to hang out with Starling. Dr. Lector. I guess should I say it too? Sure. Dr. Lector.
Your this is way better than either of ours. I'm actually a woman from Western Pennsylvania. Can you do a Christopher Walken? No? th. It. It. It. It? It. It? It? It. It? It? It? It. It. It? It. It? It. It? It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's, th. It's, th. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's th. It's like, th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's like th. It's like the. It's like thi. It's like theeeeeeeeeeee. It's like theee. It's like the. It's like the. It's like the. It's like ours. It's because I'm actually a woman from Western Pennsylvania.
Can you do a Christopher Walken?
No, can you?
You were so good at Jodie Foster and he didn't think you could do it?
It was a woman from Western Pennsylvania.
Like Christopher Walker.
You're not a dancer dude from New York City.
I've been trying all day. Do you want to give it a shot and we can take it out of need be. Katie, I can't. No, you just sound like my Uncle Vic. I don't understand it.
Here's $5.
You put it in your bank.
That's a pretty good grisor walking?
No, that's Uncle Vic.
It almost felt like he didn't actually read the script.
No, he was like, I'm an angel.
Well, that's pretty good walking. I'm working and working. He needs the monkey boy to drive him around.
That was terrible.
I'm sorry.
That was a terrible Christopher Walking.
I thought you were having a stroke.
I'm sorry, I got scared for a moment.
Why can't?
Why can't?
But Christopher Walking can drive, can't he?
He says later on that he can't drive. That's why he needs those people with him. That's a very dumb reason. I don't know, maybe he has to sit like a bird in the car.
Can't touch the gas pedals.
Come to a daddy.
Come to daddy.
Come to daddy.
Hello. And come to daddy?
What is that accent?
That's his accent. Come to daddy? Come to Daddy? What is that accent? That's his accent! Come to Daddy? Come to Daddy?
Come to Daddy? It would be better if he didn't say it 67 times through the movie. Come
to Daddy? Remember the time that I made up a bunch of facts about Kirkland University from
the movie The Ring to Trick Katie. Let's hear those again.
You know, Rachel really loves Kirkland University.
Yeah, wearing the shit out of those shirts.
I did some quick internet research on Kirkland University.
It's in Kirkland, Washington.
Their mascot is the red-breasted tit thrush.
No it is not.
Their journalism and video stuff school is one of the top in the country. Oh I guess that's probably what it was
picked for this movie, yeah. They annually sell out-sale other schools in
ladies sleep sweaters which seemed to be what she was wearing all the time.
Interesting. And you'll appreciate this. Polly Shore graduated from Kirkland
Magm Cump- Buddy. Kirkland Magnum come buddy. I can't believe you waited 11 and a half minutes into the podcast to stick that in there.
That's really good. That was the long cut. There is no Kirkland University.
Oh my facts are made up. I believe it. Especially when you said the journalism and video stuff program. That seemed real.
One of my absolute favorite things that we've done and apparently one of your absolute favorite things that we've done as well was on the Coraline episode where we did the PSAs for kids.
I don't know any way better to put this and I think that Katie's genius truly shines through on these. We did some really fun, funny PSas for kids. For chasks. I their. I. I. I. I. th. th. th. th. th we th. th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th th that that that th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th th th. One th th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th. One th th th. One th th th th th th th. One th. One th. One th. One th. the the. th any way better to put this and I think that Katie's genius truly shines through on these.
We did some really fun, funny PSAs for children, I guess.
I don't, I hope no children listen to this.
And if you are, you learned a little something.
And I feel like I should probably mention, you'll hear a weird little ed point where you'll hear Katie say, but a horn noise and that's because in
this Coraline episode we were trying not to swear and that was how we edited out
swear words. You should listen to this episode it's ridiculous but try a little
taste of what we did in this. Kids, drinking is not a way to solve your
problems but it does make you feel better temporarily. So like, but.
No, you did it, you did it.
That was bad.
I don't have to believe that.
Fiddle sticks.
Oh, Gibbs.
Okay.
Enough about our, you know what kids like to hear
what kids like to hear about office jobs?
So kids, let me t garbage out in time? Anyway. You hear the truck coming down the street in the morning and you're like, too late.
Oh, fiddle sticks!
Put it on the tea!
Kids?
Manual labor and food service teach you character.
Always be kind to food service employees, which you will be if you ever work in it.
So just get out there and earn a few bucks, send out some resumes. I've... Yeah, why don't you help your parents out?
What are you doing all day?
You're expensive.
You are so expensive.
That's why I don't have you.
I don't think.
So... Are we doing a good job?
Kids?
Are your parents giving you enough food and attention?
I don't think any kid thinks that they're giving them enough food and attention. I don't think any kid thinks that they're giving them enough food and attention. You know what I mean? True. And then you look back at your
childhood and you're like why wasn't anybody paying attention to me? And
then your therapist is like here's a bill and you're like, okay. Are we doing a good job? Are we doing a good job or not? Katie? What? I have a quick question for you. Yes. What do you? What? th? th? th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. thi, th. th. thi, why, why, why, why, why thi, why thi, why thi, why thi? thin thin thin thin thin? And you thin thin thin th and you th and you th and you th and you th and you th and you th and you th and you th and you th and you th and you th and you th and you th and you th and you th. th. th th th th th. th. thi, why, why, why, why, why, why thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? that that? that? that? that? thi? thi? that thi? thi. thi. thi. thi tell you we're doing the job or not. Katie, what?
I have a quick question for you.
Yes.
What do you get a huge Harry Monster steps on Batman and Robin?
What, I don't know?
Flatman and Ribbon?
That was actually pretty good.
What do witches put on their bagels? Locks?
Scream cheese.
Oh, that's not even good.
No one was not even good.
Witches don't do a lot of screaming, do they?
I guess they do. It's fine.
Who cares?
I think if you start tackling these jokes.
I know I need to not start tackling these jokes, we're just gonna fall. I'm just assuming they're written by children because they're so terrible.
Yeah.
They sound like popsicle stick jokes.
Oh, I love popsicle stick jokes.
Me too.
Also, you know what I love?
Yeah, popsicles.
They got a whole freezer of them downstairs.
Do you? Why am I not eating one? Kids, if you have popsicles, it's always nice to offer your friends one.
Hey kids, never read the comments.
Man, that is a good piece of advice for kids.
Do you any other good advice for kids?
Always go to the dentist.
Always go to the dentist.
Like, don't be afraid.
It sucks, but just go.
Yeah, don't, don't take 20 have to go to the dentist a lot. Yeah, just go to the dentist, like every six months or every, even if you go once a year,
I think you're probably fine.
Yeah, yeah, brush, brush two times a day.
Floss.
Definitely.
I'm glad that we Don't ever smoke. I loved smoking though. I had so much fun smoking. And also when I went to college, I made so many friends smoking.
Like, that's how I made all my friends is just smoking outside buildings.
So like, smoke, but only in college.
Definitely don't smoke.
Just quit when you get out.
And then for the rest of your life, be like, God, I't smoke. Fine, don't smoke. Okay, and they do for a little bit, though.
Let's see, always leave 12 inches between you and your dance partner for the whole of the ghost.
You don't want to get pregnant.
Yeah. Always tip 20% or more.
Because the people don't make any money.
Yeah. Just be cool.
Yeah. And, you know, that person brought you your food. You got sustenance from th. You th. You th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. th. th. th. thoome. thoome. thoome. thoom. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tha. tha. tha. tha. thea. thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. the. th food. Yeah. You got sustenance from them.
Remember how we were just talking about how you want someone to make food for you?
Yeah.
That's what they're doing.
I mean, they're not making it, but there's a whole series of things that happen.
Try different food.
Try something out of your comfort zone.
Yeah, for sure. a Korean dish called Beepenbop. I love Beepenbop! Guys, could try some Beepenbub.
You'll like it.
Yeah, and you can get it totally vegetarian,
totally delicious.
Nice.
Talk to your grandparents,
because they have a lot of interesting things to say.
I'm like so, a part of me feels very sad
that like my parents were so so and not not in to to to be to be to be to be to be so lucky to have been raised by grandparents because I like learned so much more about the world and about history and what, like being an immigrants in America.
their history and what it's like being an immigrant in Amidstern Pittsburgh.
I guess kids these days don't have likely don't have parents who are immigrants in America.
But sure they do. Probably not our listening audience there in Pittsburgh.
Don't ever be ashamed of needing therapy. Oh my god, therapy's the best. Yeah, it's the best. I grew up with a lot of stigma about that and since, you know, I've done it, it's amazing.
We're getting really deep here. Yeah, kids need to, these are life lessons that kids need.
I just want to go back to smoking for a second though. I really want to move on for all the parents out there. Eat pizza. Oh, everybody, everybody knows that.
As I'm putting this together, it is summertime and I feel like we'd be
remiss if we didn't talk about Jaws in this clip show, but we've never done Jaws.
So let's hear some stuff from a movie that was suggested to us by Mike Bukowski called The Last Shark.
This movie is bonkers and an amazing rip-off of Jaws.
You should definitely see it.
Oh, hey Katie, how are you?
I'm good.
I just woke up from a nap.
Oh yeah, how was it?
It was good.
I had this really weird dream that I was like dreaming about Jaws.
Yeah.
And like, but it was weird.
It was like, about Jaws, I think? Yeah. And like, but it was weird. It was like not quite Jaws.
Was it like sort of Italian?
I think so.
Nobody's lips match their voices.
Yeah.
It was a.
I had the same dream.
Whoa.
We're here to talk about the film Great White.
A, the last shark.
OK, the last shark. The last shark. Okay, the last shark. Oh, I'm sorry.
Okay, the ultimate squamo,
B-bubb.
That was pretty good, honestly.
And not at all offensive.
Kialo.
Yeah, James Francisco's character is named Peter Benton.
Come on, fucking guys. They weren't even trying. It was so good. I mean, do you think that was supposed to be like, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, that, that, that, that, that, the the the the the the the, the, the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, t. Oh, t. Oh, t. Oh, t. Oh, t. Oh, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tap. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. t. t. t. t. t.a.a.a. t.a.a.a.a.a.a. t.a.a.a.a.a.a.a. t.a. t.a. t. t. Come on, fucking guys.
They weren't even trying.
It was so good.
I mean, do you think that was supposed to be like a hat tip to Peter Benchley?
Or do you think that...
What's close to Benchley?
Mm, Benton?
Good, let's go.
Good.
Keep typing.
Keep typing. though. There's a scene where they put in this anti-shark netting, which looks like shit.
Oh, it's chicken wire.
I don't know what they're doing.
Chicken wire in a bathtub.
And they show the Great White attacking it, and it's obviously a bottle-nosed, thing
this thing.
There is a porpoise that appears several times in this movie, like really obviously like a beautiful porpoise too.
And I was like, what are you fucking doing?
Did you just pay for the stock footage?
And they accidentally sent you this one too?
The one from Echo the Dolphin.
Like, I don't.
Oh, Flipper showed up on the set.
Yeah.
They're like, just go through that, go through that net.
Why were they all getting in sleeping bags on the beach? The sun was still out.
It was inexplicable.
It was day for night.
I'm convinced that they were shooting day for the night, but not putting any blue gel
like a tellure. Like, like, soldier? Like, like, theyce. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. their. th. they. th. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. t. t. t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t the the the the the the the go to sleep for the sun came up. It literally looked like everybody was taking like a lunchtime siesta.
It made no goddamn sense.
And then, like, why would they be swimming at bedtime?
You know, since noon.
Did you notice the shitty jaws music when the shark was swimming?
That's my next note. I love the music that plays when the shark bust through this cheap ass fence. It's just like,
Brrr.
It's got more notes.
It's like, but on it up, put on up, pop, put on up,
but on up, pop.
Suddenly, one of the instruments was a comb with wax paper.
And it was just so shitty.
They have no idea where the shark might be, but they just drop into the middle of the ocean. They're like, up, there he is. They're looking for a 35-foot long shark in a cave the sides of my bathroom.
They, yeah, they look for the shark in a lot of inexplicable places, including later a
crash helicopter.
Do you know how big a helicopter inside is?
Not big enough to house a 35-foot shark. So the shark is like, the shark, thii, the shark, the shark, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the shark, thi, the the thi, the thi, the thi, the thi, thi, the thi, the thi, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta.ea, ta, ta.ea, ta, ta, ta, ta, their their thi into the sides of the cave, and I was like, why is this shark so fucking dumb?
And then I realized it was walling them in, and I was like, oh, not only is it a fucking genius,
it's also an engineer. It walls them in.
If I just, just, I wanted to beep when it backed up.
Meep, me, beep. So here are some clips from a movie that is just as bonkers, as Last Shark.
We did this episode pretty early on on the M-Night Shambalon movie, The Happening.
It turns out that it's just the gift that keeps on giving because it gets brought up so
so much on the show as a terrible movie that some of us think was really fun.
I am. I should start with sort of a, uh...
An apology for making you watch this movie?
Yes and no, because I, it was so bad.
Well, okay, so I watched this movie sitting on the floor of my hallway, I watched on
my laptop, holding a hair dryer into the access panel to my pipes to my to my
bathtub because they had frozen here in the Pittsburgh tundra and so I was
already pissed off like I was already ready to be so mad at this movie so it
was really just set up for me to be angry and you know it really let me get a
lot of that anger out. Oh awesome you had something to focus it on.
Yeah instead of frozen pipes.
This is a movie about trees getting pissed off at humanity and taking us out with a neurotoxin of some sort.
Inexplicably, like at random intervals, there's no rhyme or reason.
The trees are coming for you. Apparently, from what I read, M-Night Chamillon was trying to do a B-movie. What? His thing was like, oh, we're making, the their their their their their tree, thi, thi, thi, thi, tree, thi, tree, thi, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree. This tree. This tree. This tree, tree. This. This. This. This. This is tree, tree, tree, tree, tree. This. This. This. This is tree, tree, tree, tree. This is tree, tree, tree. This is tree. This is tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, tree, M-Night Chamelon, was trying to do a B-movie.
What?
His thing was like, oh, we're making a B-movie.
It's not supposed to be good.
B-poo, which I think is what you say after you make a shitty movie and then realize that.
But B-movies have monsters or villains, or villains. What? No, this is... Right. What? They have Roger Corman telling you to make it an under a week.
Like, they have restrictions.
This movie had no restrictions.
Its budget, I'm sure it was astronomical.
And it was actually commercially very successful, I think.
Yeah.
But has, I think, 17% on rotten tomatoes?
Yeah. One for each of his visible and invisible abs.
The second note that I have here, I actually took five pages of notes during this movie, so...
Which is not what Katie does when we watch these things.
Normally I just stare into the ether, but I have written here, the second thing I have written here is a quote from Mark Wahlberg that just says, come on, buddy, take an interest in science,
which he said to one of his students.
And I literally almost threw my laptop.
I just couldn't believe it.
Yeah, throughout my notes, I refer to him as Marcus Mark,
because I believe that he's an adult now
and we should treat him as such.
So if I slip and call him Marcus Mark, thrown. Was the twist the twist the twist the twist the twist, the twist, the twist, the twist, the twist, the twist, the twist, the twist, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. thu, thus, thus, thi, throw, thi, throw, thi, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I, I th. I th. I th. I th. I's, I's, I's, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm th. I'm thr. I'm thr. thr. thr. thr. thrown. thrown. thrown. thrown. thrown. thr. thr. I thr. I thr. I trees? I don't know. I don't, I think this was his attempt to not have a twist.
So he just like, there was no twist.
It's like, I don't have a twist so, oh, here's everything I have.
Yeah, and then like seriously the credits were all and I was like, I missed it.
I must have been.
The twist was that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that. Mark Wahlberg is running through a field,
trying to figure out what's going on,
and stops and goes, be scientific, douchebag,
talking to himself.
Did he say that?
How did I miss that?
Be scientific, doubty?
Do you think he like read that in the script and was like, oh. Well, my note right after that is maybe this is a poor, thaaa, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thii, thi, thi, I, thi, thi, I, I, thi, thi, thi after that is, maybe this is a poorly executed comedy?
I was wondering if this was, I was going to actually introduce this episode as M.
Nishnamalan's first attempt at comedy, and a wildly successful one at that.
I also have written in my notes here, I am not a science teacher, but to the best of
my knowledge, one cannot stay ahead of the wind.
That's a thing that's suggested as an escape in this movie,
staying ahead of the wind.
How are the trees generating the wind?
Trees don't generate wind.
That's not where wind comes from, M-N-Iight.
M-N-Intyre, you got it wrong, buddy!
Oh, God.
It wouldn't be right if we didn't include the maestro of Bonkers movies himself in this little clip show. So
let's hear some clips from the episode we did on Fulties The Beyond. Putting
this together I realized that his movies are so crazy and you sound so crazy
talking about them that we could have literally just put them in any order and it's
still kind of makes sense. Kind of like his movies do. So, you know, here, have a listen.
You'll see what I'm talking about.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie,
Lutio Fulcchi.
It's not good.
It wasn't good.
Lutio Fulcch.
Hey, it's nice. It's nice to make a movie, said it in Louisiana. We're gonna make a lot of ethnic jokes, probably.
Sorry, Nanna.
Hi, Nanna.
Hello, Nanna.
Sorry in advance.
She thinks it's funny.
You know what one of Nanna's favorite jokes is?
Can I tell you what Nanna's hair took is?
Did you hear about the Italian helicopters?
I have heard about the Italian helicopters? I have, I have heard about the Italian helicopters.
If you don't want to finish this, I have heard about it.
I'll just leave it there.
You guys can Google it probably.
Go to Nauta Jokes.
She likes that one, it's fine.
I feel dumber, I have to be honest.
And for that, you can thank Lucia Fulchie. Lucci! Fulchi.
That's pretty good.
Thank you.
I could have whistled it, but I didn't know how thou that would work with the microphone.
A lot of the sound effects in this movie actually confused me, like the storm.
Why is it raining only happening? Why is the storm
only happening inside? Portal to hell? It's like they're showing these like very
in the beginning this sort of flashback scene which isn't sepia because it's
old and times. Yeah because it's old. It's old. The first note I have we
started out from Louisiana in 1927 you know what's old because it's sepia. I'm glad you take such detailed notes because mine just says old-and-time sepia,
which is good.
And there's this very dramatic, like lightning and thunder,
and it's just rattling this house,
and then it cuts outside and there are these villagers coming,
dries the bone.
Silent.
Like, okay, all right.
Because the storm is raging inside of the house. Well, I wondered about that, but I don't think that was intentional.
I think it just wasn't raining that day, and they were like, well, fuck it.
There's not, like, there's not a line of meaningful dialogue in this movie.
You can watch it with the sound off.
I actually thought about it at one point, because it's a little distracting, you know,
the overdub was watching this on mute, I would be having literally the same experience. Except for the score, which is fucking bananas.
Ah, Fabio Freezy.
So good.
It's a fabio.
It waivers between like Miami Vice and like almost upbeat nostalgic, like a person like, like, um, looking at their wedding photos 50 years later and their spouses died, but they have these warm memories. That's what the score sounded like to to to to to me to me to me to me to me to me to me to me to me to me to me to me the like the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their f. their s. their s. their s. their f. their f. their f. their f. their f. their f. their f. their f. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. I I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm the the the the the the th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, and their spouses died, but they have these warm memories.
That's what the scores sounded like to me.
I really like his scores.
They're sort of like a low-budget goblin.
I like him a lot.
It's just like, I don't care.
Do whatever.
It's fine.
I just need music here.
Yeah. Oh, is this music? This is great. This this great. This is great. This is great. This, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this is great. T this. T this. T this. T this. T this. T this. T, this is great. T, this is great. this is great. this is great. this is great. T, this is great. this is this is this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this. this is. this is. this is. this is. this is. this. this. this is. this. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. This is this is this is this is this is this is th is th is th. the. the. the. the. the. th. the. the. th. thi. th. thi. th. the thi. This is great. Plug it in. That's another thing, like, we're going to get to the movie in a second, but I'm just going to keep harping on Fulchia what I love about him.
Like, the fucking like, one-take, wonder everything seems to be.
Like, there's a, the scene in the library, where the guy goes to look at the land deed or whatever. Fulch he is the guy the guy the guy goes the guy goes the guy goes the guy goes the guy goes the guy goes the guy goes the guy goes the guy goes the guy goes the guy goes the guy goes the guy goes the guy the guy the guy the guy the guy the guy the guy the guy the guy the guy the guy thoom. to go go. the guy to to to go. to go. to go. to go. the guy. the guy the guy the guy to go go go. to go go. to go go go go. the guy. the guy the guy the guy the guy the guy the guy. the guy. the guy. the guy. the guy. the guy the guy. the guy. the guy. the guy. the guy the guy. the guy. the guy. the guy. the guy the guy the guy th. thi. thi. thi. the. the. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thi. thi. thchie is the librarian who like comes in, he's like, I'm gonna go lunch. Oh, the guy's checking his watch and being annoyed.
Oh, weird.
Watch him when he's like, he doesn't speak a lick of English,
but when he's supposed to be speaking English,
he's just like making monkey lips.
You're just going, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
And it's like, it he's the director.
But most of them aren't pulling it off too well,
other than the people who actually speak English as a first language,
but like...
This movie is distressingly gory.
Yeah. To be honest with you, I watched just very distressed. I was like I'm gonna watch Caddyshack instead. I need to calm down. I was wondering if it was gonna be too much and then I was like I
don't know how Katie feels about ocular damage. I don't really mind it.
Okay. But I know people really do and this movie is just like fuck your eyes,
fuck your eyes. Fulch the fulch. She must have been terrified of it because every movie has somebody getting their eye fucked their f fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked I I I I I fucked I fucked I fucked I fucked I fucked I fucked I fucked I fucked I fucked I fucked I fucked I fucked f f f f f f. I fucked. I fucked. I fucked. I fucked. I fucked. their. their. their. F. their. F. F. their. I f. I f-I. I'm. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. I'm. F. F. I'm. F. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I I's. I I I's. I I I's. I I's. I I I's. I's. I's. I's. I I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I'm. I'm. I'm their. I'm the the the the t. I'm t. I'm t. I'm the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. I their they eye fucked the fuck up. And a lot of people get their eyes fucked the fuck up. And why was there an open bottle of acid though?
Like, why was it just there?
It's, every time I'm like,
who the fuck puts hydroclark acid on the top shelf?
Why would you, like, why would it not be stoppered or something?
I have to mention real quick that I love the southern accent in this like.
Were there southern accents?
There's the painters?
Oh yeah.
She's like, how much long you guys think for you?
Well, we should buy hair another day or so?
Then he just goes, bye.
Do you think it's a nod or do you think he was like, good idea?
I will do that too.
I steal that from your movie. You never see Suspire.
I will have seen Suspireia.
I'm buff on goal you, Dario.
There's art prints from other artists in there.
There are-
I have the fluke man on my fridge right now.
It looks so good.
I say I hate it.
It's a great print but the fluke man gives me the fucking creep.
He lives the the the th. gives me the fucking creeps. He's supposed to, he lives in the pooper. He doesn't live in the poop. He lives where your poop goes. In the pooper,
reach him your butt hole. I think I have called it, refer to the toilet as the pooper. But I also
refer to my baby niece as pooper, so it means what I say it is.
And for our last set of clips, we're going to delve into the world of Stephen King, slash
Stephen Kang, and talk about the movie Thinner.
I think you're going to like these and keep an ear out for what a vanilla milkshake can ruin.
Well, yesterday was my birthday and I spent it watching Thinner so that gives you a pretty
good indication of how my life is going at the moment.
Happy birthday.
Just eating tie gourmet and watching thinner.
Man, I love tie gourmet.
All right, real quick.
I love tie gourmet too.
It is my go-to.
Their spice level is all fucked up at the moment.
I ordered a six. I like like like spicy, I the spice the spice the spice the spice the spice, I their spice, I their spice, I their spice, I their their their th. I th. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi, thi, ti, ti, ti, t. I t. I tie, t. I t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, t, is t, is t, t, t, is t, is t, t, t, t. I is t. I is t. I is t. I is t. I is t. I is t. I is t. I t. I t. I t. I t. I t. I t. I t. I t. It. I'm today. It. It is just just just just. I'm today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today, today. Just. I like spicy food. I got a six and it was like almost inedably spicy.
Get that.
Taigorme, you're officially on notice.
I know you're listening.
Get your spice levels together.
They are like rather pell-mell what they're spicing.
Doesn't mean anything.
It means nothing.
Yeah, numbers mean nothing.
They're really nice though.
I always know me when I go in. And their food so delicious. Yeah, I wouldn't know. I couldn't eat it. Also I was watching
fucking thinner so. Like nothing in this movie is very good with the exception possibly of Joe
Mantena. Oh my god, no. Yes, yes. He's fat Tony all the time. It's so good. I thought he was racist towards Italians in this movie. Well, yeah, everything is racist in this movie.
Everything is terrible.
He was like the only part that I was like, okay, I'm enjoying watching him.
What is Richie the Hammer Janelli doing in New England?
Am I wrong?
No, no, not at all.
The time I've spent in New England, it seems like it's just white people wearing Northface. And I mean that a really nice way.
My friends live in Portsmouth.
It's a beautiful town.
Beautiful town.
There is no mafia there, is there?
Probably.
Yeah, they probably came up from New York City.
Ah.
That's like retired mafia. golden years. This is just another movie of like people with fucking ridiculous names too. Like the guy that Richie the Hammer Janelli is accused of putting
a hit out on is named Max Duganfield and they say it's 45 fucking times. You're
like Max Duganfield who would put a hit out on Max Dugan field? And Max Dugan
field like I don't know my wife. I don't know. Talking about PMS and menopause?
The court system is loosey-goosey there.
It was terrible.
Oh man, I wish they'd gotten Fred Gwyn to be the judge, just like in my cousin Vinny.
Just good. Yeah. I love that movie. It's a good movie. Yeah, it's great. Also kind of racist against Italians.
Okay. You...
You... S...
Why can't fat suits look real?
I don't know.
And he's shirtless at one point too, and it's not good.
Keep your shirt on if you're going to do this.
I mean, if you're going to hide, you know, you have to hide your poor work here.
Because later on there's some special effects that are really good.
But the fat suit not ss thxxxxxxxxfaxe effects thuffe effects thuffe effects that are really good, but the fat suit not
is so much.
What special effects are really?
When he gets really thin, I thought they did a good job of like building him up in the
cheekbones and I thought the lizard man looked really good.
Did you?
Did you?
Yeah, I did. Because, and we've been told about the lizard man by his wife and she describes what he looks like and I was like why don't you just fucking show us the wizard man
Show don't tell the wizard man
the lizard man
Wow
Wow
And then when they did show him I was like oh, I guess I thought he looked cool. There was like bits of him falling off and that I didn't thin. There was like bits of him falling off and empty? that. that. that. that. that. th, I. th. th. th. the the the the the th. the thin. the the to to to to to the the to to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to to to me me to to to to to to to the wizard's to the wizard's to the wizard's the wizard's the wizard's the wizard's the wizard's the wizard's to to the wizard. the wizard. the wizard. the wizard. the wizard. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the t. tell tell tell tell the tell tell tell to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the wizard man. was on remote control, the television game show on MTV.
What are you saying?
The gypsy, the sexy gypsy, Hari-Wur.
She was on, there was this show on MTV in the 80s called Remote Control where you
like got strapped down to a chair and you had to like name all these videos.
Oh. And she was the sexy hostess on that. And, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, the, the, th, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, she was the, she was tho, she was tho, she was thole, she was the, she was tel, she was tel, she was tel, she was tel, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was, she was the, she was the, she was the, she was the, she was the, she was the, she was the, she was the, she was the, she was the, she was the, she was the, the, the-c. She was the-c. She was the-c. She was thevo-c. She was thevo, the-c.c. She was the-c. and you had to like name all these videos. Oh.
And she was the sexy hostess on that and she's terrible in this movie.
I just felt like I'm playing a gypsy.
Like every line she's delivered was delivered like that.
She's just like a third rate like Alyssa Milano or something.
Yeah.
It was weird.
I mean, nobody is good in this.
Can we agree?
Except probably Joe Mantanya.
I'm going to disagree with you on them.
It's fine.
You can keep disagree.
I don't even know what was wrong with it per se.
I mean, I think just that rubbery fresh, that rubbery
flesh just does not look good. No, I guess not. And there was an abundance of it.
A lot of it. I'll wobbling around on his neck. Did you notice that his eyes were always on
ten? His eyes were always bugging out. I have a note here it says this guy's acting is just like crazy-eyed smiling. Because I was trying to figure out what his character arc is.
But he's crazy the whole time.
He just goes from being a crazy fat guy to a crazy thin guy.
He seemed like a lovable fat guy in the beginning though.
But you know, he didn't even take responsibility for his actions.
He did a bad thing, which is running over a gypsy woman who was crossing the street while he's getting roadhead, which he then later also blames his wife for. You know, he could have said no. She seemed drunk, you know, I don't fault her for this.
Is this movie, I think it's one of two things. It's the showing you the ills of upper-class white men.
Sure. Or it's a parable about why not to get roadhead? Both. I don't think those things are mutually exclusive.
I mean, to be fair, it's a dangerous thing to do.
It's just kind of gross.
Like, I spilled a vanilla milkshake all over the seat of my car like two weeks ago,
and I can't clean it up, and it's just like now hardened.
So the idea of putting my face
really close to that is just so gross to me. Well think about all the times you
stop. Think about all the times you like fart in that car seat it's winter and you
don't put the window down. I'm not putting my face on it. I'm not putting my face on it.
I'm not putting my face on it. You have a dog, that dog is riding in your car sometimes.
Yeah, yeah, you want to put your face on that seat? No.
I, but there's a body between you and the scene.
Yeah, I mean, it's still pretty close.
Would you, you want to go outside right now and put your face on my milkshake seat?
You're not, you don't want to. No, I do not. I th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, you, I, I, I, you want, you want, you want, you want, you want, you want, you want, you want, you want, tho, you want, tho, you want, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th th tho, I tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, milkshake seat? You're not, you don't want to.
No, I do not.
Oh, I thought your milkshake story was going to be about you sucking the milkshake off the seat.
Oh, no, no, just spilling it.
Just spilling it and then being like, well, I guess this is ruined.
I guess I live here now, well, whatever. Wheal Fee empties the empty is the empty is the empty is the empty is the empty is the empty is the empty is the empty is the empty is the empty is if the empty is if the empty is if is if the empty is if the empty is if the empty is if is if you is, if you is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is they? is, is, is, is, is they? is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I is, I is, I is going. I is going. I is going. I is, I?. I is, I is, I is, I is, I is, I is, I.... t.. t.. th. th. I is,olah, let me know. In the beginning we see a caravan of fucking cars from the 50s coming into town,
which you just immediately like, oh cool, gypsies? What the fuck? What's going on?
I don't know. I guess that's not entirely inaccurate.
In America? Yeah, my husband was telling me when we were watching this movie
that when he lived in Chicago as a child, gypsies came through and his mom wouldn't let him go play in the yard because she'd heard
that they kidnapped children, which is not true.
But he insists that that happened, so I don't know.
He was not a large child.
He needed some protecting.
She also had to guard him from the falcon.
Just circling the house.
. him from the Falcon. Just circling the house. Sorry, Ron.
You'll never hear this.
Okay, so we'll...
So I don't think it's, I mean, as racist as this movie is, I don't think it's completely
inaccurate that they move around the country and do stuff.
Yeah.
Although apparently later in the movie they say that, oh, they always come up this way and they end up in Maine Maine mainainainainainainainainainainainainainainainainainain the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their tha. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. the. the. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. thea. the. the. the, they say that, oh, they always come up this way and they end up in Maine at the end of the season. So, like, why's everybody so fucking surprised?
And Thicker, you get a really thick milkshake and you're super psyched about it and then
you fucking dump it on the front seat of your car like an asshole.
Oh my god, the cover for Stephen Kang's thicker is just a milkshick. And you wishing you'd shelled out for leather seats. Look at that cheap shit.
Shit.
Well, that's going to do it for this clip show.
Best of Greatest It's episode.
Thank you for listening.
Thank you for supporting us and telling your friends about us.
You can rate and review on iTunes that helps other people find us.
This is a good time for people to find us because they can get caught up on everything
and then start new with us once we come back with new episodes.
I want to say a quick thank you to Jason McKitrich and Cryptocurium
for sticking with us this whole time and being a great sponsor for us.
And I also want to thank Katie for doing this with the
doing this episode without her Doing this episode without her has maybe, you know,
even more appreciative of how fantastic it is
to be able to do the podcast with her.
So you are all awesome and thanks so much for listening
and we'll be back shortly with another clip episode.
And thanks for listening to another episode of Whe Will Family
Bye.