Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 116- The Descent (2005)

Episode Date: January 9, 2017

In this week's episode, we're diving into the all-female 2005 adventure/monster horror film "The Descent." Special topics for your consideration include: side effects of seitan consumption, being glad... that one is not an adrenaline junkie by nature, tales of Kennywood (for those of you non-Pittsburghers, it's a local amusement park that is greatly beloved by the city's population), how a trailer can really ruin a movie and how senses work.  Have you seen this one? What did you think about it? Let us know at facebook.com/werewolfambulance, on Twitter @werebulance or on Instagram @werewolfambulance. You can also email us for our segment "MAILBAG!" at werewolfambulance@gmail.com.  Check out our sponsor this week as well: Cryptocurium (www.cryptocurium.com) where cool horror stuff gets handmade and then delivered to your door on a monthly basis via the Parcel of Terror. You're going to love it, we promise you.  Werewolf Ambulance is a horror movie comedy podcast. 

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Aren't you glad you're not an adrenaline junkie? Ugh, so happy. Like, what is the deal? What is the deal with adrenaline junkies? What is the deal? I do like three flights of steps and I'm like, pretty cool exercise, bro? Like, what is the deal? What is the deal? I do like three flights of steps and I'm like pretty cool, pretty cool exercise bro. I'm glad that I have lady friends with whom I like just eat pringles and talk about feelings and watch movies you know or like how do I get into that party? You gotta have you gotta have a, you can't
Starting point is 00:00:37 have a peeper. No peepers. Yeah you can use your pringle you can you will eatingles with you. Oh, I talk about feelings. I love talking about feelings. Yeah, we can talk about movies. Well, we do that every week. It's true. Well, every other week. Wink? We could definitely have pringles, though.
Starting point is 00:00:53 We could have those, though. I'm In Rome. Oh. When I was in Rome. They don't have those at the S. I don't go down there by your house. Because I go there to get snacks often. They have my favorite brand of white jettor popcorn though, which is Sniders.
Starting point is 00:01:15 Oh yeah, yeah, Sniders. It doesn't stick to your fingers enough. And welcome to another episode of Weirwolf Ambulance. I'm Katie. I'm Alan. We're not adrenaline junkies. We don't do this stuff. No, but I am somewhat jealous of that lifestyle. Why? Look how it turns out!
Starting point is 00:01:38 Not every white rapids. that turns out like this that is hard to say and I had to slow it down. White rapids. I ra rapids. I to th rapids. I th rapids. I th rapids. I th rapids. I th rapids. I th rapids. I that that that that that that that that that that that that that like this that is hard to say and I had to slow it down. White Rapids. I've never been on a white rabbits. No, no. I wouldn't probably. I guess maybe. I've canoed. Does that count? I once rented a tube and floated down the yuck with a cooler full of or a thermos full of Bloody Marys. That sounds dupe. Is that, is's pretty extreme, man. I almost ran into a bridge pylon, but I was able to push myself off with my legs. So, you know, it's, it was scary.
Starting point is 00:02:12 I am happy that you have adopted adrenaline junkie and not the term I was introduced to by this film, sports fuck. I, yeah, I feel uncomfortable with that. I am into sport, but I wouldn't call myself a sports fuck. You know what I mean? I play sport. You do. I play sport. But I wouldn't fuck it. I don't think you're fucking the sport. What are you fucking then? The other sports people, I guess, right? No. I think it means you are. So it's like, um, being married to your job,
Starting point is 00:02:48 but it's you're just fucking sports. That was the impression I got. You're probably right. I think I'm right. We're gonna talk about the 2005 film, The Descent. Yeah. Neil Marshall, a bunch of ladies. Yeah, I love this all-lady cast. It's amazing.
Starting point is 00:03:05 There's one man in it for like a minute, and then he gets murdered. Who's the husband? Oh, yeah, I was like, who? Oh, God. Yeah. So the movie starts off of the whitewater rafting. And everyone's going, we're going, wea!
Starting point is 00:03:21 Which doesn't seem fun to me. I love that the biggest part seemingly of their whitewater rafting is right where the husband is. He's just waiting there. With a little girl, the daughter. I was like, what are you teaching your daughter? Are you teaching her this is okay? What is the example you're setting here? Just mountain do code red. That's a different Mountain Dew product, excuse me. And yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:48 The dad's mad and he's wearing a turtleneck sweater. He's probably mad because he's wearing a turtle neck. These people are European, we should say. Yeah. Most, okay, here's, okay. Every woman in this movie is from a different country and has a different accent, including the two who are supposed to be sisters. Yes, the one sister sounds very Scandinavian.
Starting point is 00:04:07 She's like the, she's the duchiest Dutch accent that ever Dutch, and she's so Dutch. And the other one's like, Swedish, I think? She was, she's from Kill-aist. Yeah, yeah. She's great. She's great cute. Such a good actress, too. Great actress. Yeah. They were all very cute and very good actresses. Everyone's got a different accent.
Starting point is 00:04:28 How are they friends? Sports fuck! How are they? How are they? Is it kickstart my heart? Yeah. Yeah, what's it? I like when you think sports you think Molly Kroo.
Starting point is 00:04:42 Those guys led very energetic lifestyles. Super energetic. I don't think it was from sports. How are the sisters from different groups? I don't know. I'm okay, just shagging. Whatever. Yeah, I guess they're, I don't know how they're all friends, but they are.
Starting point is 00:04:58 And Juno is the one American. Yeah. And she is set up, well, we should say that Juno and Beth and then Sarah, Sarah is sort of the main character of the piece. And her husband is the guy waiting, Sarah's husband and her daughter. Jessica? Jessica? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:14 And Sarah gets picked up by the husband and Jessica and they're driving away. Earlier we see that Juno and the husband exchange a glance. He's like taking her helmet off very gingerly and like stroking her cheek. Like, what do you doing, fucking guy? Everybody's right the fuck there. Your child is right there. It was very not subtle.
Starting point is 00:05:34 No, not at all. Especially not with that furtive glance. No. And then they're driving away in their very European car. Yeah. On the wrong the wrong the wrong their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their they they they they they they're they're th th. they're th. they're thi thi they're they're driving thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. they's they's they's they's they's they's they're they's they're they're they're they's thu. thu. thu. they's thu. they's thu. they's thu. they's they're thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. theeeat thea. tea. tea. teat. tea. tea. tea. tea. thu. thu. th, on the wrong side of the road, no wonder they get into an accident. So this car accident they get in is literally my car accident nightmare. Okay, well here's the thing, in my memory of this movie, I thought that it was like a truck in front of him that was carrying lumber, and that lumber like flew off. Yeah, that happens in another movie. Maybe, yeah, maybe that's where I'm getting it from. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:05 But this makes literally no sense. They hit another car head on and the other car had just a bunch of pipes in it. I have copper piping on top of it. What were they doing with all those pipes? For a plumber. Maybe. But so the copper pipe shoots through the windshield though. Yeah, yeah. A little moat to come of decency. Yes. Which I would say this film has in spades. Yeah I think it's tasteful. Because
Starting point is 00:06:30 an all-female cast in a different hands could have gone a very, very different way. Yeah, I think it's um, it's interesting that a man wrote women so well. Yeah, you know. I feel like men writing women has been historically historically very bad. I feel like men writing women has been historically very bad, very very bad. I feel like Neil Marshall has a pretty good handle on that. Yes, it was pretty good. Or he just like asked for a lot of help which is also very very good. Yeah. I should have gotten an 11 year old girl involved on this. And then? And then? So the next thing we see is Sarah waking up in the hospital. This is my nightmare waking up in the hospital. This is my nightmare, waking up in the hospital and not knowing why you're there by alone,
Starting point is 00:07:07 yeah. The last thing you remember is a car accident? Yeah. And so this is the first time that I cry in the movie. Oh, but tea. So Sarah goes running down the hallway in the hallway and this great scene. the hallway is going the hospital but hers yelling for her daughter. Yeah. I've got I've got the chill bumps right now because of that. Uh-huh.
Starting point is 00:07:27 And then she runs into Beth's arms who just says she's gone. Yeah. And like, fucking waterworks. I'm done. Yeah, they're crying on the floor. Yeah. And all these people are just walking around them being like, eh. But I love the way way th people th people th people th people th people th people th people they they th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi's thi's thi's tho. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tho. tho. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeea. theeeea. thee. the. that they just come out. As soon as she's out of the dark hall, as soon as the lights come back on,
Starting point is 00:07:45 they're just walking. It's like so well done. And Juno is there also crying, but then she like runs away. Yeah, and you're like, huh, that's weird. Yeah, fucking Juno. So we fast forward a year. And they're like, Beth and they they the the thane, the the thane, than, than, than, tha, tha, tha, tha, they're, thi, they're, they're, thi, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's, it's, it's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's like, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thrown. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's likealachia Scotland? It's supposed to be in the US, I guess. And they're like, Beth and Sarah are driving in a car,
Starting point is 00:08:10 and Beth's like, you know we don't have to do this. Lady, you flew there. You're kind of committed at this point. Is that car a rental? What was it? It's just like a pick-em-up truck. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. What was it? What was it? Like a... It's just like a pick'em-up truck. Oh yeah. With like rope tied around the front of it and rock chick.
Starting point is 00:08:28 Bumper's Dicker. That had to have been, I feel like that car had to have been sports fuck ladies. Oh, is that Holly? Holly? Yeah. I just don understanding of it. No, I kind of love her though like just for like the sheer like insanity of her It's just the kind of person that they were around you'd be like shut up You know for sure she uses terms like sports fuck. It's true and she's Irish. Yes, Sarah is Scottish Mm-hmm. Beth is English. Yes and then we meet the sisters
Starting point is 00:09:04 Sam? Uh-huh. Who is Swedish? Yes. And then we meet the sisters. Sam, who is Swedish? Yes. And her sister, Becca, who is Dutch. Yes. It's very confusing there. And Juno is our American. Yes. Our's.
Starting point is 00:09:16 We're playing Juno. This is what we have. USA. USA. to brag about, Juno. The real monster of the film. So this intercontinental women's group is getting ready for- I hope they call themselves then.
Starting point is 00:09:32 Yeah, the IWG. They are getting ready to go on a caving adventure. Yeah. Which sounds fucking awful. Awful. Not down with that sickness. Do not want to go into the ground. Although, all right, so actually the note, the like, the theoretically, caving sounds
Starting point is 00:09:49 really interesting to me. In what way? I'd like to see all the formations that are under the earth. Well, you can do that in ones where you like's one of those caves. It's in PA. You can get out a little rowboat and go around the cameras. Are you sure you're not thinking of Garfield's nightmare at Kennewood? Welcome to Garfield's Nightmare, a nightmare from which you may never awake. This is the most frightening adventure you will ever be on. I must have. I'm not, but I want to know what that is now. Have you ever been to Kennywood? to the the the to to to to the to to to to to the to to the to to go. to the to to go. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm to to go. I'm to go. I'm to go. I'm to to go go go go go go go go go go go to go to go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go. I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to go. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. G. to to to to to Garfield. G. G. G. G. G. to to to to to the to the to. God, you got to go to Garfield's Nightmare. It used to be this amazing ride when I was a child called Hard-headed Harold's Horrinds and humorous Haunted Hideaway. Then it became the old mill. Then it became by Jim Davis.
Starting point is 00:10:45 I don't know what happened. It became Garfield branded. Wait, so in 1986, right? This would have been like a mid-2000s, I'm going to say, early, early? It's a high of Garfields popularity. It's now a 3D ride where you get glasses and other people have been sweating in all fucking day. And you, Garfield basically eats too much much and has a nightmare and that's what you watch. I have definitely done that.
Starting point is 00:11:06 Oh yeah, oh my god, yeah. That's the kind of adrenaline I can get behind. I have tum tum nightmares all the time. Um, what is the ride where you ride around in the car and shoot stuff and you're an old man's haunted? Oh, um, Lord Ghostington's a f-Imissue. that. that, that, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, I'm not very good at it. I just watched things go, E! I was beast at it. I was very stoked. Good shooter. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:29 Yeah, well, that's our Kennywood segment. There used to be a great Kennywood ride called the Gold Rush where you got into like Indiana Jones in the Temple of Doomstyle cart and went through a mine.. Yeah, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, a the the the the the the they. A the th. Good. Good s. Good s. Good s. Good s. Good s. Good s. Good s. Good s. Good s. Good s. Good s. Good. Good. Good. the ceiling. Yeah, it was great. And then there was Lake Hacho, which was a castle that you were in this like half seat that was like a padded and looked like a throne kind of. And it went, like, grinned, it was really scary. Once I wrote it by myself when I was like 10,
Starting point is 00:11:57 and I got too scared and covered my eyes for the entire ride, but it comes back out in the line, basically. So like people who are waiting in line see you come out. And when I took my hands off my glasses, they were all fogged up and it was really embarrassed. Okay, that's enough, canny-go what, I'm sorry. So, but I do like the idea of like, I've been in caves a couple times and it's pretty neat and like the idea of like exploring them, but......... I, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that no no no no no no no yeah this movie really hits home the tear of claustrophobia so yes yes I think the an interesting thing about this movie is that it's kind of two movies one of which is very good in the other which is not as good
Starting point is 00:12:40 I will disagree with you on that later but but yes. I mean I think it's you know it's building and building and building but I think that the first half is scarier than the second. Oh for sure. Just for me personally. Fear? Yes of course. I was gonna say if we want to get into it right now I think that the thing that comes later is actually a great pressure release for me of like like the first half being like the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. the first th. th. the first th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. the first first first first thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I the first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first. I the first. the first. I the first. I the first. I the first. I the first. I the first. I the first. I the first. I'm. I'm. I'm th. th. I'm like. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the first. the first. the first first. the first half being like so scary and then when it like becomes fantastical, I'm like, oh I can deal with this. Yeah, I understand this as being unreal. Yeah. Like it's like if you were watching a home invasion movie and then all of a sudden it was just like,
Starting point is 00:13:12 oh, loonytunes cartoon, you're like, all the sudden the home invaders were goats. Yeah, you're like, oh. Oh, black Philip. There's the the the the the the the the the the movie. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. think they're all done fantastically well. Like when they're in the cabin and she's looking out the window and then the pole comes through the window and hits her in the face. I was like, fuck you, you got me, you motherfuckers. It gets me every time and I know it's coming. I know it's coming.
Starting point is 00:13:35 Yeah, itthat's fair. It's fair. So they're, they, Juno presents this to the group that they are going to a place called Borum Caverns, which is apparently like a pretty easy cave climb for experienced cave climbers. More like boredom. Shut up, Sparck. Splunkers. That's a gross word. So they go to the entrance of the cave and it's literally just a fucking gaping hole in the ground. What? How have the National Forest Service not know about this hole? This is my question. Because they park and walk there. It can't be that far. It's true. So where is like, I'm assuming this is like West Virginia, Kentucky? I mean there's all sort like like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, I the like, I the like, I the the the their. I their. I their. I th. I their th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. the the th. the So where is like the, I'm assuming this is like West Virginia, Kentucky? I mean there's all sort of like, I drive past the wilds of Pennsylvania all the time to go out to, towards Scranton.
Starting point is 00:14:34 There's long stretches of fucking nobody. So like, it's feasible. I don't like it. We should mention that before we get to the hole in the ground, Juno has picked up the Borem caverns guidebook and gone, pff, and throwing it back in the car because she knows. And they pass a deer, that was air quotes, that is like no animal found in the United States. I thought it was a moose. And I was like those aren't in Appalachia. It looked like an elk or something. It was crazy. It was an enormous mammal with big horns that does not live in. No, but it looked really cool. Yeah, it looked great. All the magets on it. Yeah, I look great.
Starting point is 00:15:12 So yes, they go to the gaping hole and they have to tomb raid their way down there. Which the one woman is like I liked. Yeah good line. I feel like at that point I would have just been like nah but that's just me. Yeah I mean and they're all kind of like what word? All right all right. And it was also interesting because Holly seemed to have been familiar with Borum Caverns and wasn't like, excuse me I don't think this is Borum Caverns. It was confusing to me. Yeah this isn't what it looked like in the guidebook. Yeah. I don't know. So they go into this goddamn hole. Yeah, and it's beautiful. Totally beautiful. And this is the first time we see Holly being a loon,
Starting point is 00:15:53 because she just like, everyone else is like slowly repelling down there, and she just unclips and zips and just goes down there. Well, she'll get hers. Just you wait,, guys. Oh, by the way, spoilers. Sarah finds bloody finger grooves down there, which is never a good sign. That should have been the time to just scrabble. We're going to Arby's instead, you know? A five for five? Yeah. I don't think they do the five for five anymore. Oh, she's a bummer. That's probably like a, you know, a good-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-s. That's a th-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-s. That's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a thi-s. that-s. thi-s. thi-s. thi-sa-sa-sa-sa-sa-sa-siooo'-s. thi-s. that's a good-s. that's a good-s. that eat five of them. I'm full of self-loathing though,
Starting point is 00:16:26 so whatever. They made a veggie version of it I would get all over that thing. How could they, I guess, look... Just a little Satan? Yeah, well you fart so bad with five of them though. You'd be a fart machine. I made Satan and Sourkraut for New Year's Day. Did you just like never want to be intimate with your partner again? I think I was just trying to fuel a rocket ship. I imagine you woke up in the morning there's just like a green cloud hanging just below the ceiling. I kept farting myself awake. Huh! Home invaders, coats! So they go into the cave and like they're going into these tight spaces and I'm like,
Starting point is 00:17:06 no, you don't do that. That thing you're doing right now, stop doing that. And they're like lighting flares and throwing them. Is it okay to just light a flare and throw it in a cave? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It seems eco-unfrien. It does. And also, what if there's there's, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, their, th, their, th, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That, th. That th. That th. That th. That th. That th. That th. That th, th, th. That th, th. That th. That th, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that thi. That thi. That th. That th. T mapped out. Yeah, which we find out after they go through this teeny tiny space in the like most horrifying jaw clenching, put a paper bag to your face and breathe into its scene where Sarah gets stuck panics and you like know that feeling of being stuck and panicking. Beth
Starting point is 00:17:37 comes back and talks her out of it. Yeah. Delivering the worst best joke of all time. I didn't get it. Remi me what it is. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the the thi. the thi. the the the thi, their the the the their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.......................................................................................... the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the worst best joke of all time. I didn't get it. Remind me what it is? It is, uh, how do you give a lemon and orgasm? Yeah. Tickle, it's citrus. I still don't get it. Clitteress. Oh, citrus. That's not great. No, it's terrible.
Starting point is 00:17:54 And I love it for all of its shoddiness. It's like not even a dad. that Beth and Sarah have probably known each other since they were like 11 years old when that joke would have flown. Okay, that's up there with like my why couldn't the ghost get his wife pregnant? He had a Halloweener? See that one makes more sense to me? But it's on far with tickleet sitres. I think that's better. I really think yours is better. Thanks. Sorry Beth. But I do have the note, Beth is a good th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. thea' the the thoe thoe thoe that's that's that's that's up that's up that's up that's up that's that's that's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. thea. thea. the the the theaa. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. that's thea. the. th's better. I really think yours is better. Sorry, Beth. Sorry, Beth. But I do have the note, Beth is a good friend. Beth is a good friend. Yeah. It's just weird that they live on different islands. Anyway.
Starting point is 00:18:32 So Sarah breaks free of this little area that she's stuck in and then the fucking tunnel collapse is behind her. And then we find out that Juno has put them in the wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong, the wrong, the wrong, the wrong, the wrong, the wrong, the wrong, the wrong, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. that's, that's thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. thii. thi, thi,. And then they filed like a flight plan. They keep calling it a flight plan, which I guess is what it's called, but I thought that was very interesting. For Borem Cavern, so no one knows they're there, no one will look for them there. Right. Yeah, fucking dummies. And then more tight spaced. And then more tight spaced. their ta. throwns. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I I I I I, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, th. I that's, that's, that's, I that's, I that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I that's. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's that's that's that's th. Then there's like a weird scene where they find the cave painting and they're like, look, two entrances and I was like, well that's sure educational. Who painted that? Who fucking painted that thing? So my theory with that is that the creatures that we encounter later did the whatever their precursor was, okay? Did that? Okay. And then when they went down the evolutionary track in a different way than human beings. I have some beef with these creatures that I would like to get into. But so there's a lot of just, I mean the first like 45 minutes of the movie is really just this like, there's a really tense
Starting point is 00:19:36 scene of them trying to get across a chasm of like swinging with carabiners, like using carabiners for what they're really supposed to be for, not just putting your keys on your belt. Yeah, like if you were Lord of the Rings in it up, but you ain't got no magic. Yeah. This is what you do. Yeah. Yeah, it's really. Yeah, I mean, the caves just build the caves just ten, ten. And it's got that weird like, bum-bomb, bumb-thing-esque soundtrack going on. I didn't even notice it.
Starting point is 00:20:08 That's good, yeah. Which this movie is kind of like a lady the thing on some level. It really is. The Swedish sister of the Swedish Dutch combo has to, it goes across and like sets everything up and then they all kind of zip line across and then Juno is like well we can't leave all this gear behind because we're going to need it later probably and then has to like fucking hand crawl her way across it unhooking things. Oh and they found a hook in the ceiling that's like a hundred years old. Yeah. So like well at least someone's been here before a hundred years ago. They didn't come out. So they're like the the the the one. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. Well. the one. the one. the one. the one. the one. the one. Well, the one. the one. the one. the one. the one. the one. the one. the one. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the one. the the the the the the th. the the th. te. te. te. te. te. true. te. te. te. true. te. the. thethey're all, you know, freaking out and this is where on that the one sister gets
Starting point is 00:20:48 that terrible injury where the rope burned, like slides across her palm. That's like one of the worst moments of the movie for me where I'm like, no, motherfucker! No. It's that pain that you know though, yeah. And also just like, you're gonna need that, that, to need, to need, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, the, the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, tho, tho, tho, throooooooooooooooooooooo, to, to, thooooooooo, tho at all later. She seems to be okay. Good thing her sister is like a doctor which I got a little mad about because they were like oh Beth here things start to go downhill after 25 and I was like if you're done with medical school you're like how old are you child you know what I mean like don't give me that shit. I mean she's one of them doogie-housers. Maybe.
Starting point is 00:21:25 Maybe. They're going further in and they get to like an open area and Holly's just like, I'm gonna run. Yeah. And takes off running because she sees what she thinks is light. Which is stupid because she knows how goddamn far they've gone down. Right. And there's some like caves that's their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their they's their they's their they's their their they're they're they're they're they're that people think is light in caves. And she has the second most terrifying scene when she falls down a fucking hole in the cave. She crunches so good. She crunches like a Dorito in your mouth. Yeah. I hate it so much. So crunchy.
Starting point is 00:21:56 And her leg bone is no longer connected to her thigh bone. Just popped right out of her skin. And you see them make like a, I mean, this is the horror, the horror, the horror, the horror, the horror, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thoom, thoom, she's, she's, she's, she's, thoom. thoom. thoom, she, she, thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. She, thoom. She, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, their, tho, their, tho, tho, tho, thooooooooooooooooomorrow, tooomorrow, toooomorrow, thooooooooooooooooooooome. Shea, through her skin. And you see them make like a day. I mean, this is the horror. This is the scary part of this movie for me. Like them making a splint and setting the bone. Like, Jesus Christ. It's that like, you know, we deal with a lot of supernatural shit on the show. And this is just like I could slip down my front steps and pop my leg right out of my leg.
Starting point is 00:22:25 At least you'd just call an ambulance. Oh, that's right. That's right. That's right. See, the hospital's like three miles from here. Who knows? Maybe later I'll become a sports fuck. I don't, I think it's too late.
Starting point is 00:22:36 I feel like you didn't do it if. months I think that'd be way too late. Yeah. Which is good it's good for all of us to not start now to just continue with our indoor lifestyles. It's true. So at this point someone has a night vision camera that we see for like basically the first time. It's Holly yeah she's filming this adventure and then this is where you see. We'd sort of seen a monster like in the distance but everyone thinks Sarah is hallucinating. Yeah Sarah keeps seeing something moving off and hearing her daughter giggling. Yeah she's starting to lose it obviously right. But then someone is looking through the camera and sees one of the creatures appear behind another person.
Starting point is 00:23:19 Well first Sarah sees the creature well when we actually first see it the flashlight down like the long tunnel and we see the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. Yeah. the the the's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. I. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. Yeah.... the.. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the sees the creature, well, when we actually first see it, is when Sarah's got the flashlight down the long tunnel and we see like some, like it's moving and like looking at her and then it takes off and it's like, that first like time you see it, it's just like, oh fuck everything. Yeah, but, but, like, everything is done. Yeah. Just that trapped, isolated feeling is so th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the th. th. the the the th. the th. the the th. the the the th. th. the th. th. the thi. they. they. they. they. they. they. the, the, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. the the crawled up into the bone room when they turn on the camera and see. Boop, bone, bone, bone. That's fun.
Starting point is 00:23:51 I'm going to miss everybody. That's good and you're going to find out in the next episode why that's good. Is it Uncle Charles? Yeah, that's all I could think about. Spoiler alerts her next week. Let's just call this one quits now and start recording that one. So they crawl up into the bone room, which is just all these animal bones. They've got the infrared camera on or the great, whatever, the night vision. And Holly's standing there and all of a sudden something jumps up behind her.
Starting point is 00:24:24 Yeah. And it's just like, this is where and it's just like, oh, yeah. Thank you. Yeah. It's definitely a relief, but also that's such a good scare, but it's in the goddamn trailer. Come on. Oh, is it? Oh, is it?
Starting point is 00:24:36 Oh, I've never seen. I've seen it. trailer and then seeing it in the movie theater and being like, I knew that was going to happen. I wish they wouldn't do that. I know. It's like one of the best scares of the movie. Yeah. Yeah. They should have been like, this is a terrifying spolunking movie. A wink. Yeah. Because it jumps up on Holly and just immediately rips her throats. to you. Right. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho. tho. the the th. tho. tho. th. th. th. th. th. the their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. Yeah. their. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's true. But. And it's just like, oh, fuck me. Like, what is, like, the first time I saw this, I was like, what the fuck is going on right now?
Starting point is 00:25:11 I had no idea this was going to happen. Oh, really? Yeah. See, I had seen the trailer. It's a bummer. Yeah. So I was just like, what, to. And yeah, so now it's done being a scary claustrophobia movie, and it is an action movie.
Starting point is 00:25:26 I have some beef with these creatures. I gotta be honest with you. Let's get into the creature beef. Okay, so you know, they fight the creatures. There's some killing, they kill, they start to eat Holly. Juno just kicks the shit out of them. And then, I almost don't blame her for killing her, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, to be, to, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to, to to to to to, to, to to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to's all up, Beth comes up behind her, and she swings that act. Clearly, they didn't mean to do it.
Starting point is 00:25:46 It was the leaving her that was, I guess, the shitty thing. Yes. Not killing her, I guess not killing her. Yeah, there's a lot of decisions. Gino could have made better at that situation. I just feel like I don't even like the creatures are all over the place. We come to understand that they can't see. They're blind. They're like mole rats or whatever. They compare them to bats. Yeah. They use sound to find their prey, which really pisses me off because
Starting point is 00:26:18 they also can't seem to smell or touch, which I find to be a very... Even thinnoughing they they they they they they they they they they they they are they are they are they are they are they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they. they. they're they.. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they're they. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're th. th. th. theeeeeat. they're they're they're t thea. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're t touch which I find to be even though they're snuffling a lot. Yeah like there's a part where they're crawling past the two sisters who are like laying in a like a little alcove like there's no fucking way you don't smell two women two sweaty women who were drinking last night like there's no way. Well there's the scene where Sarah has the video camera and the one gets right up to her and that video camera would be going the the the the the the the the the the th like the th like the the the th th the th the th the the th. th is th is th. th is th is th. th is th. th. th. th. the. the. th. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th is th is th is th. th. th is th. th. th. th is th. th is th. th is th. th. th is th. th is th. th is th is th is like th is th. Yeah th. Yeah th is th is th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the is the. the. theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. thee. the. the. the. the, Yeah. Like, there'd be some noise emanating from it. Yeah, and even like when she's laying on that rock and one steps on her, I'm like, it knows, it would touch you. It's that scene, though. It's good, it's good if you can suspend your disbelief that they have one cents.
Starting point is 00:26:56 Yes. And maybe they taste, too, presumably they they they they they not the illusion of the other day. I just, I find that's so distracting to be like, that fuck, those fuckers, they can't see you, they can most definitely smell you. For sure. For sure. For sure. Yeah. But I think I was like, the first time I saw this, I was spooked enough that I was like, I'm gonna gonna th let let that, I'm gonna that, I'm gonna that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm that, I'm a that's that's that's that's that's, I'm that's that's, I'm that's that's that's that's that's that's, I'm that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm that's, I'm that's, I'm that's, I'm that's, I'm that's, I'm that's, I'm that's, I'm that's, I'm that's, I'm a that's that's that's that's that's that's that let that slide. Never let the logic slide because I am an asshole. Not true. You just have a very logical mind. I have a very illogical mind. So just
Starting point is 00:27:30 chaos ensues. Yeah it goes on for a real long time. Sarah has like ended up kind of away from everybody else. Like they all kind of run off in different directions. And Juno is just screaming for Sarah and I'm like you need to shut the funk up Doug. She seemed like like like like like like like like like like like like th th th th th th th th th th th that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th th th to to to that that's th that to to to that to that to to to to to to to to to to to to to to that that to that to that to the the that to to the to to the the the the the the the the the that's the the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm the the the the the the the the the the the the to the to the to to that that th shut the funk up Doug. She seemed like more savvy than that. It's true. She should have known, not known better but like she should have thought better of that. It's true. But who knows I guess you're panicked and everything's terrible. Yeah and she feels bad for you know humping her husband and stuff and she's wearing this necklace right. She's wearing this necklace, the necklace necklace necklace necklace necklace necklace necklace necklace th necklace, th a a a very very a very a necklace, th necklace, th necklace, th and a very very very a very th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a necklace, not th. It's a th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi, not thi, not th. thi's not thi, not thi, not thi, not thi, not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not not th. th. th. th. th. Not th. Not th. Not th. Not th. Not th. Not th. Not th. Not th. Not th. Not th. Not th. Not th. Not the. Not thi. Not thean. Not thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. And it's a very, it's a statement piece. You see it. It's not, it's not like a subtle little piece of jewelry. It's a giant leaf.
Starting point is 00:28:08 Not just a little choker with a shark tooth on it or anything. No, it's not. On the back is engraved the phrase, Love each day, which is literally what the other woman's husband's to say the thu. You are like, you uncreative motherfucker, like, what are you doing? It's also like, you're husband's corny. Corny as hell. And also, like, how palsy of you to wear that necklace when your friend might be like, oh, that's pretty, let me look at it?
Starting point is 00:28:36 What is anybody doing in this movie? I don't know. Okay. It's like, she's just flaunting it. Just flaunting it. Sarah's in the, like hiding out, and Holly's body gets dropped down. And then lady versions of these monsters come out and start eating Holly's body. Okay, you can tell their ladies because they have long hair and titties. Yes.
Starting point is 00:28:57 The international signifier of ladies. And I don't know why I did a sweeping arm motion like I had a bunch of ladies over here. You were like behold the ladies. See that's gonna be so useful in our YouTube episode you're sweeping our emotions. Behold. She's watches Holly's body get consumed and then stumbles upon Beth's body, which is under like a rack of beef ribs. I hadn't noticed before watching the movie the time that they had been eating Beth's legs, her legs are all eaten up, that gross me out, but I don't know why they put the beef ribs on top of her. How has she not blood out? She got literally
Starting point is 00:29:35 chunked in the throat. But this is where this is where it gets very the thing when Beth is like, you can't trust you know. Yeah. And what she means to say is, yo, the mother fucker killed me, dog? Yeah. She did, she says, she did this to me, which is, okay. Sarah has to kill Beth before the monsters come and finish her off. With the wr- That's gross and terrible.
Starting point is 00:30:00 So, I feel like Sarah probably had a knife on her I don't know because she has to get the she gets the the splint off of Holly Yeah the ice axe that they were using as a splint she takes that off of Holly's legs So she well, I don't know. Yeah, I guess the rock would be quicker than you know I could much more easily cut my friend's throat throu crown the rock? I??? I tho thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. I, I th, I the th, I tho, I th the tho, I tho, I the tho, I the tho, I tho, I could the tho, I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th th. I th th tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I te, I te, I te. te. te. try try tho thro throoo thooo the. the. the. I the's throat than crush her head with a rock. Really? Yeah. Oh, wow. Because what if you crush their head with a rock and they're like, uh, you're gonna do it again? What have you slipped their throat? They're just going, ah, ah, before. I feel like it'll be faster somehow. So if Sarah wasn't snapping before, she's definitely on the road this point. She looks lunatic. And then she goes full fucking Monty lunatic. So to get away from the monster she hides in the blood reservoir. Well she's
Starting point is 00:30:49 running and she falls into the blood reservoir and I was like how'd that get there? What is it? It's downhill from all the floor where all they even happens? Oh God. So she jumps in this pool of blood or falls in this pool of blood really? The amount of animals they'd have to be to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the their. their. their. their. their. their. their their. their their their their. their. their their. their. their. their their their their their their their their the monster. the monster. the monster. the monster. the monster. the monster. the monster. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. to. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the of blood, or falls in this pool of blood, really. The amount of animals they'd have to be killing for that full of blood to be there. I just looked at and I was like, cool but why? You know? It's like six foot deep. Yeah, she is down under. She's swims.
Starting point is 00:31:15 She's underneath for a long time. So she jumps in there. And then she comes in she's just covered in gore and like her She's just gone and then she fights the lady Beast who's also hiding the blood reservoir Confusingly enough and she falls back to you get her in the blood reservoir. And this is when she lays down and her eyes are wide open and the things up and like stands on her and puts its hand on her head and It's very scary, but just I just find it illogical. Oh, sure, but it, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, and it, and it, and it, and she, and she, and she, and she's th, and she's th, and she's th, and she's th, th, thinks, she's thi, she's thi, she's thi, she's thi, she's the the the the the the the they they they they they they they they they they they, she's th. th, she's th, she's th, she's th, she's th, she's th, she's th, she's th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi's thin, thin, thi's thi's thi's thi's just just thi's just thi's just thi's just thi's thi's they's eyes are wide open and the thing comes up and stands on her and puts its hand on her head. It's very scary, but I just find it illogical. Oh sure, but it's so like, that is an iconic image from this like. It absolutely is.
Starting point is 00:31:53 Yeah, for sure. Um, I think they look cool too. The creatures, they do. They do. I just am mad at the way. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I just. I just. I. I just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I just. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I just. I th. I'm th. I'm just th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that that th. th. that that that that is that th. that. that. that. that. th. th. th. the way they live. Picture if Bat Boy from the Weekly World's News was an actual thing. That's what they would look like. Yeah, and we're super buff. Yeah, they're dancer bodies. You know how I love a dancer body? You're just so into those dancer bodies.
Starting point is 00:32:16 Who also had it? Oh, Jeff Goldblum. And the guy from Christine. Oh, yeah, the old guy and the old high school student. Buf or something I can remember. Pimpy? I don't remember what it was. Buddy. It was Buddy. It sure wasn't Routy Burns. More Pimpy. I love Pimpy. I don't know where that came from. This is my friend Pimpy. He's in my shop glass. Anyway. So Sarah has gone over the fucking edge. She's now just a murder machine? Yeah. She meets up with Juno. Yeah. And. So go. No, no, no, please. I'm not going to make any sense if I try to explain. Your adrenaline junkie is up. I'm also drinking a lot of coffee again.
Starting point is 00:33:06 Yeah, this is your adrenaline junkiness. Drinking coffee at 8.40 p.m. So her and Judo get into like fucking mortal combat with a ton of these monsters. Yeah. They're the like of the two sisters, and Beth's done, and Holly's done. So yeah, they're the last two. And Juno's trying to like, be like, we're pals, let's get out of here as pals. But Sarah knows now.
Starting point is 00:33:34 She does the most fucked up thing ever. Well, before she does that, she does the thing where she puts her thumbs to me. And then, like, the, the, the, the, the, the, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thumbs and then like pulls her thumbs out and wipes them on her pants and I was like, I love you right now, this is so intense. It's pretty gross. Yes, and then her and Juna were standing face to face and Juna's like we got to get out of here and she's just standing there staring at her holding the ice axe up and you hear the screaming of the monsters coming, yeah, right in the calf, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, to, to, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, to, and, to, to, to, to, th... And, th. And, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th.the calf. Just a laser to die. But to be eaten to death. Yeah, because then you see the creatures start chunneling down the chunneling. That's chunneling.
Starting point is 00:34:12 Channeling down the chimneys what I was going to say. You know what I'm saying. Yeah. And they, not both virgins. Oh, well, if you're a sports fuck, you might still be a virgin. I don't know if sports is penetrating you. So, well, there's, they're both the same up to a point. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:40 So, um, I had seen it in the theater, and so I had seen the US theatrical release is the one that ends early. Right. So I had when I saw this ending I was like no no shit. Yeah. Oh so you saw the different ending this time. It was on the DVD yeah. Oh, okay. So, so. I own and have watched a bunch a bunch of times. But the first time I saw it. It was like. Oh, huh. Well, th. Well. Well, the. th. th. the. th. the. th. the. th. the the th. the th. the th. the th. the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the. the. the the the the the the the the the the the theat. theat. theat. theat. the at th time. Oh okay. Yeah because my... This is like clue it's like, was it Michael McKean or not? So Sarah gets out of the cave. She finds a way out. Yeah. They were right there all along really. They were pretty close. Well were they? So she she climbs up this giant bone mountain. Yeah bone mountain. the dirt like a, just an awesome scene of like, and then runs to the car, drives down the road, a big truck drives by her as she pulls off the road, she pukes, she gets back and it looks back into the car and Juno's ghost or whatever is sitting like, like, wah-ah-soah. So in the US version, credit's roll. And it's like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's, that's like, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, th.. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. the. the. thi. th. the. the. the. thi. thi. th. thi. th. th. th. a bad ending to this movie. It really is. And then in the UK version, you go back to Sarah,
Starting point is 00:35:49 and she is having a, she wakes up out of this dream of having gotten out of the cave, and she's still in the cave. Face down in the cave. Yeah, and she starts having a dream where she's having cake, or a birthday party for her daughter. Yeah. And then the camera that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's tha that's the the thiiiii. thi. the thi the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi that's that's that's thate. the th. that, the the the the the the the the to to the to to to too too too too too to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to too too too too too too too th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the Yeah. And then the camera starts to pan out, and she's still in the cave, she's about to get swarmed. And the cake is actually just like her torch sitting in front of her and there's no one on the other side of it.
Starting point is 00:36:12 And it's so wonderfully brutal and fuck you. So they such a fuck you ending to this movie. It really is. However, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, however, it, however, however, however, however, however, however, it, it, it's, it, it, it, it, it, it's, it, it, it, it, it is. However, it is. However, it is. However, it is. However. However. However. However. However, it is. However. However, it is. However, it is. However, it, it, it. However. However, they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they th. However, they th. th. they thi, they thi, thi, the thi, the thi. the thi. the thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, right? Yeah, and Juno's still alive. Oh, really? I never saw the sequel. So they made a sequel to the US ending. I see, but Juno, oh, I guess we never saw her die. She's gonna be out. She was pretty badass.
Starting point is 00:36:32 The sequel sucks. It's not good at all. I think they downloaded it once and then never even got around to watching it the the the the the the the the the the watch watching watching watching watching watching watching watching watching watching watching watching watching watching watching watching watching watching watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch watch, thanks. I have these other movies to watch. So yeah, that is the dissent. Hoy, I feel that's a great movie. You want to be we Raiden? Yeah, Radio Face? What are we doing?
Starting point is 00:36:55 What are we doing? Rain? Hey, maybe? Great movie. I love that the like talk about how they're feeling about this all happening like I feel like women in horror movies tend to be like the this girl, the popular girl, the smart girl, the dumb girl, you know what I mean? Like the sexy one, the nervous one, but in this they're like much more flushed out human beings I feel. Yeah, they seem like a group of people who would actually be friends with each other. And they seem like real people. So I really like that. The creatures, eh, I feel pretty man about them.
Starting point is 00:37:29 They look cool, but like, I just can't believe how well thought out. It's rare in a horror movie that the character development is so well thought out, and then the creatures make no sense. So that kind of made me like, thi Come on Neil, you got so close So but I think everybody should see this movie. Yeah, I'm gonna give it a nine nine nine nine Nine I love this movie. Yeah, I like I just adore it I'm gonna give it a ten But I'm gonna tell you why because I think like Neil Marshall does this with movies. He does these mash-up films. He has a movie the movie. He has a movie. He's a mrs. He's a mrs. He's a mrs. He's the the the the mish the mish the mish the mish the mish mash mash mash mash mash mash mash mash mash mash mash. the mish. the mish. the mish. the mish. the mish. the mish. the mish. the mish. the mish. the mish. the mish. the mish. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. N. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the Mad Max, meets Lord of the Rings for a little bit. That seems confusing.
Starting point is 00:38:08 It's very confusing, but I really enjoy it. He evidently wants to do a Western, that's a mashup of The Thing and the Unforgiven. I hate that. I don't really like Western. I don't really like Deserts, if I can be honest. We're not supposed to live there. But, um, and I felt like this movie, oh, in this movie Dog Soldiers is really good too.
Starting point is 00:38:32 Yeah. It's sort of like a werewolf comedy action movie. That sounds like us, but as an action movie. Exactly. But this movie, like the characters are well fleshed out. I think their relationships feel honest. Like they're actually would, they're having conversations you would have.
Starting point is 00:38:49 The weird tension between Juno and Sarah seems very real to you. Like, I feel like I know that feeling. I mean, not in that level, but like, just like you've let me down, but I'm stuck with you because of all all th these all all these these these the otherusting Beth's balls for the like pajamas that she has on. Yeah, poor Beth dying old and alone. So old. She's great. She's pretty great. And I love that like, it's a movie directed and written by a dude that's all women.
Starting point is 00:39:15 And it's not like, there's not a, oh my god, your shirt got ripped off. I'm like, just keep running at the camera and we're just gonna pan down. You like it like it like it like it like it, it, it, it, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's, it's, it's like, it's, it's like, it's, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it and pan down. You know, it's like, it's handled very tastelly. They're all super buff but nobody gets sexy. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So it's a great movie. I love this movie. And like, I want to do this.
Starting point is 00:39:33 I want to do this. And I feel like we've watch the sequel and let me know how it is. We'll talk about it. I mean, we won't talk about it. You can talk to me about it. I don't know, we'll see. We'll probably have to talk about it where we run out of movies. I know, we're's that movie? We are Marshall? What's that? Is that one of them sports movies? It's a sports movie. It's about Matthew McConaughey and the dead football team, you know?
Starting point is 00:40:09 What? It's based on a true story, at some point the Marshall football team died in a plane crash. And then like all the JV players had to play. succeeding against all odds. I fucking love a heartwarming sports story. It's uh, they're, you know, here West, West Virginia, not that far from here. Oh, okay. I'm at Balaisha. You love these at Belation movies. I do. So maybe you could like, you like, how do you feel about Matthew McConaughey? You want to buy Lincoln? I would say he's all right, all right, all right. Yeah, you can get it. Speaking of the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. He the the the. I. I. I. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the that. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I that. I that. I that. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'll. I'll. I'll. I th. I'll. I'll. I'll. I th. I th. I th. I that. I love. I love. I love. I love all right, all right, all right. Speaking of more than all right, all right. You guys like Crypto Curium?
Starting point is 00:40:50 You like it? Of course you do. Do you like CryptoCurium? I'd give it a 10. Oh yeah, maybe a rare, a rare, 11. A rare but not unheard of. It's true. Cryptocurium is a monthly subscription box that you can sign up for at www.crym.com. What's in it? Like what's in it? You like wallpacks? You? With monsters? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:13 Yeah. I just reorganized in my cryptozoology collection today because I realized that Rob had put my headless horsemen in with them and I was like, no, no, no, no. Come on, that's mythology? Yeah. the. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. to. th. the. to. th. the. th. the. th. th. th. th on that's mythology not crypto zooology fucking guy do you like I mean that I'm looking at the Freddy pizza wall plaque right now it's a pizza look at that every time I come in it's creepy shit it's little faces on a pizza soul pizza we should open a restaurant called soul pizza oh shit I feel like maybe that's not gonna work out very well all the pizzas would have little Freddie masks inside them. People are like, oh this is disgusting. I'm breaking my teeth on these. Magnets? Pins to wear in your jackets and your bags to look cool? Stickers? Stickers to put on your notebooks when you're journaling? You know I always had a hard time with stickers because I could never commit to what I want to to to th th th the the th the th th the th th the the the the the th the the the the th. the the the the th. You th. You th. You th. You th. I th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm the. I'm the. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm, th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm the. I'm t. I'm te. I'm te. I'm te. te. te. te. te. th. I'm just just just. I'm just a hard time with stickers because I could never commit to what I wanted to put them on, you know?
Starting point is 00:42:07 If you're like that, if you're like me, just get the print, they've got prints in these boxes too, just get a print. Yeah, you take on your fucking wall. You take that with you. You take the print with they're all these amazing horror-based renditions of amazing shit. Handmade by Jason? You're going to love them. Painted.
Starting point is 00:42:31 Guest artists doing prints and stories? Yeah. And it just comes to your door. 35 bucks a month. Do it. What are you waiting for? What are you waiting for? I don't know. I don't know. Like whatever. Whatever. What are we doing next week?
Starting point is 00:42:46 We are doing a return to the Friday the 13th franchise. I'm so sorry. Okay Here's what's up. Alan emailed me and he's like what are we doing for the week after? And I was like well we've got a Friday the 13th this month let's do a Friday the 13th movie because I was planning on watching the original. I'm a loser and I'm gonna stay home. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the the the the the the the the the the th. the the th. the th. the th. the th. th. th. the th. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. the ne. ne. ne. ne. the we we we we ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. ne. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the ne. the the the ne. the the ne. the the the ne. the the the the the the the the ne. the wee. the the wee. wee a Friday the 13th movie because I was planning on watching the original I'm a loser and I'm gonna stay home. Yeah Because I'm tired and it's cold. Yeah I was gonna watch the you know original Love that Kevin Bacon death scene sure I thought maybe we could do a cool Friday the 13th movie. No, we're gonna do a shit. the Friday 13 movie. Did I choose one with Horshack from Welcome Back Cotta in it? I don't know who that is but I don't think so. No it did not. Because nobody, they don't make actors as bad as they made for this movie. I'm sorry. Jason takes Manhattan number eight. My theory was we've already done number seven. the the the the the the. the. the. the. the. theory. theory. theory. theory. the. the. th. th. th. I. I. th. I. I. th. I. I. I's. I's. I's. I's. No. I don't. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No........ No................ they. they. they. they. they. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I they. I they. I they. I they. I they. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. They they they they they they don't. No from the last movie. I know we need to get into that one because I have so much to say about it.
Starting point is 00:43:46 All right so that's next week it's free on Amazon right now. I think maybe maybe this Friday there's a Friday 13th this month. It seemed like the entire series was free on those so check them out. I mean I I honestly don't want to tell people to watch it. to watch. to watch. the to watch. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. the the the the the the the th. to to be to to to be to be th. to be to be to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to be on to be to be on th. th. th. th. the the the to be on the to to the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. thr. the. the. the. thr. thr. the. the. the. the. the. be mad at him too. Yeah, you should watch it and come back and listen to us, get lose our fucking minds over it because the coffee has kicked in and we're about to record this next episode. Spoiler, alert. The curtain has dropped. Thanks for listening to another episode of Wear-Woof Ambulance.
Starting point is 00:44:16 Find us on the internet. We love you. Bye. you know

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