Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 161- I Am The Pretty Thing That Lives In The House (2016)
Episode Date: January 29, 2018Was last week's episode too fun for you? We get it-- "Shaun of the Dead" is a fun movie. It's time to get serious. This week we're discussing the 2016 Netflix film "I Am The Pretty Thing That Lives I...n The House." Special topics for your consideration include: Things that are great (Shirley Jackson) and things that are not (hockey fans, poetry lovers, Deadheads and men named Scott), the terrors of New England and ASMR, Bob Balaban fandom, salt lamps, and possibilities for bonus episodes for Patreon* donors. *We do not have a Patreon. Did you miss our other haunted house film reviews? Check out Episode 64- "The Haunting," Episode 83- "Paranormal Activity" and Episode 85- "House on Haunted Hill." Have you seen this one? How did you feel about it? Let us know your thoughts at facebook.com/werewolfambulance, on Twitter @werebulance or on Instagram @werewolfambulance. You can also email us for our segment "MAILBAG!" at werewolfambulance@gmail.com and if you're feeling super generous, leave us an iTunes rating and review.  Check out our sponsor this week as well: Cryptocurium (www.cryptocurium.com) where cool horror stuff gets handmade and then lovingly delivered to your door in the form of the Parcel of Terror on a monthly basis. You can also sign up for their secret society, The Order of the Thinned Veil, in which you can profess your love for all things Halloween and be rewarded handsomely for it! Werewolf Ambulance is a horror movie comedy podcast. Â
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Alan, are you okay?
Alan, are you okay?
Yeah.
I'm the chubby guy who lives in the house.
That you're
a kid.
Alan, are you okay?
Yeah.
I'm the chubby guy who lives in the house.
That's the thing I can say here that's not like a little bit unkind, but it has to do
with...
I mean, it's true, I am that.
You do live here.
I mean, it's true, I am that.
Oh, are we, are we, we're digging our, we're doing our collodipin episode.
I'm a ghost, so I guess now I just, I just talk like this all the time.
When you're a ghost, it's difficult to emote, I guess.
It's true, and then Bob Balaban shows up and I have really awkward conversations with him with really long pauses.
I love Bob Balaban. I love Bob Balaban. This is't love Bob Balaban? I love Bob Balaban.
This is this is getting into ASMR territory.
Gotta get on brand. Can I make a confession?
It's gonna be you didn't watch this movie.
No, but I did watch a bunch of ASMR videos. Are you in? No, I don't get it.
I think that's a thing you either get it or you don't.
You get the little little little little little little little little little the little little the little little the little the little the little tick little the little tick little tick little tick little tick little tick little little tick tick tick tick the little tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tickly the little tickly tickly the little or you don't. You get the little tickly tinglies on the back of your neck.
I just felt like I was doing something I should hide.
Like I was like, didn't want them to show up and my YouTube recommended.
I mean, my YouTube recommended.
You definitely watch it go.
Oh, people jerk off to this.
Oh, they're so jerking up. Hi. I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm th. I'm th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I. I. I. I th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I th. I. I th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm th. I'm t. I'm t. t. t. t. t. t. to. t. to. to. to. to. to. th. th. I'm th. I'm th. I th. And this is a werewolf ambulance. Are we doing the whole thing like this? It'll keep me from screaming.
I can stop whatever you want.
What are we, what are we doing here?
We're talking about the Netflix movie.
We found a Netflix movie to watch.
Yeah.
I am the pretty thing that lives in the house.
Very tonally different from the other Netflix movie we did, which was the the the said it, I knew what was wrong.
I watched a movie called Monster Trucks.
What? Tell me about Monster Trucks.
Monster Trucks is a Nickelodeon movie about a kid who lives on a farm and finds a monster that makes his truck go real fast.
I love that. It wasn't as good as I'd hoped it would be.
But there was an actress in the movie and I went, you're the babysitter. And I got really stoked because he was the babysitter.
That is weird.
Yeah.
And also, you're just digging deep into the Netflix, huh?
Yeah, yeah.
It was a fun time.
It's cold outside.
Oh, it is so cold outside.
It's colder than, I don't know.
What's something that's really fucking cold. There is a collage of icicles on my back porch right now that is absolutely gorgeous.
That's nice.
I'm glad you're finding some positive in this just Arctic blast misery.
So, cool, cool.
Cool.
Cool.
Cool.
Yeah.
Snacks.
You know, it doesn't have a heater blanket or snacks, a ghosts.
It's true. Presumably. Especially the Victorian ghost. Yeah, I want to talk about that.
I want to talk about her. I want to talk about all this. What are we talking about? Did we already say it?
We already did. We did. We did. that. We did it. to the Perkins son of Anthony. No shit. Air to the Perkins. their perken's. to their the per the the per th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. to. A. A. A. S. A. A. A. A. S. A. A. A. S. A. A. A. S. A. A. S. A., did the soundtrack to it. Osgood and Elvis?
Yeah, you did it, Anthony.
Come on.
Come on.
At least Elvis is a first name, because Osgood is 100% of last name.
He goes by Oz, though, and that's, there's no cooler nickname than Oz.
What about Ozzy?
Yeah, but then you might get mixed Yeah, that one. This movie stars Alice Morgan from Luther.
Yes.
I was like, I know you with your weird upper lip.
Oh, Ruth Wilson.
Yeah.
You said Alice Morgan.
She's Alice Morgan and Luther.
I'm dummy.
I'll be over here now.
She does have a weird upper lip.
She's, I find her to be stunningly beautiful. She is gorgeous. Or handsome even, like, in a very complimentary way of saying.
That's not a nice thing to say, I don't think. Oh, I think it is. Glenn Close, so handsome.
You know, it's always like. You know, Glenn Close for, for real listeners of this podcast. What are you, me? What are you me? th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, thi. I, thi? th. that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, th. I th. I th. I th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. thi. th. th. th. th. th. you, me? Yeah. She's a real done Rickles.
He die.
Oh, Mr. Funny man.
RIP.
Go on.
I just find her, uh, yeah.
She's just a stunning looking person.
She's just like, yeah.
She's crazy in Luther.
Yeah.
So I kept expecting her to like wild out at some point in this movie.
Like Nick Cannon? Yes.
Former husband of Mariah Carey.
Edmunds, Full Circle.
Yeah, making all the connections.
That's not a circle.
Closing all those circuits.
Sure.
Yes, but she is the polar opposite of that.
Yeah, an American.
Yeah, and a hospice nurse.
Yeah, man, that's, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the... That's the Lord's work.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Nothing but respect for people who do that.
For sure.
Doesn't work out so well for her, to be fair.
I have a question from my notes that I'd like to ask you.
I'm ready.
Hold on. I need to get to my notes. Do today, today. Katie. Whoa, that's notes.
I take some notes.
Yeah.
Why is New England the creepiest place on earth for white people?
White people are terrified of New England.
I think it's because it's our oldest place.
I think it's the problem with America as we just haven't been there that long.
Yeah.
So it's like like it's like th th th th th th th th there that long. Yeah. So it's like, you know,
Seattle's only been there like, what, 30, 40 years? If that?
If that.
If that.
So we got to start on this coast and get scared.
So like first scare, always scare?
I think so.
I think so.
Because this takes place in Massachusetts,
brain tree. Did you notice that it was like brain tree Massachusetts and the guy's name was Mr. Wax Cup? Bob Balaban? Was it wax? I didn't even get his
name. Yeah and they live on T Cup Road and I was like what is all of this like
sort of cutesy weirdness? Yeah. Also she's from Altoona which I think is
probably sounds weird to other people's ears but to us it sounds normal because we live so close to it. I always think of Mr. Belvedere
when I think of Altoona. Why? Is it there? I don't think so, but I think in some episode
they took a like a road trip to Altoona and it got like lodged in my brain. It was like,
Altoona? Mr. Belvuna curve? The Altuna curve. What is that? The Pirates double A affiliate. What?
Yeah.
Yeah, buddy.
Yeah.
That's my baseball noise.
No, that was good.
That was a home run.
Oh, uh, I'm sorry for your loss.
Thank you.
Catch.
Right.
Yeah.
Yeah. No, not anymore we don't.
We meet Lily Sailor, who I really wanted to call Lily Taylor in all of my notes.
Sure, why wouldn't you? And Bob Balaban. Love Bob Balaban. So many bees.
It's such a fun name to say. He's so funny too. Not in this, but in like best in show, he is one of the funniest parts of that movie. I am oh So much in my opinion
I am H O
I wouldn't say that about myself
SMDH
That's a throwback
Canola it's to me. Come to a daddy
He's so funny in those movies that when he's on screen like, uh-huh. It just as much as you're waiting for her. It's too. It's to. It's to. It's to. It's to. It's to. It's to. It's to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to too. I to to to too. I'm too. I'm too. I too. I too. I too. I too. I too. I too. I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the too. I'm too. I'm too. I'm too. I'm to too. I'm too. I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to Daddy! He's so funny in those movies that when he's on screen I'm like, uh-huh?
Just as much as you're waiting for her to go bat shit?
Yeah.
You're like, look at him like, okay, he's gonna, he's gonna do this now.
Because he was on Seinfeld too, wasn't he?
Wasn't he the head of NBC on screen?
Oh, yeah, he was. You're right. You're right, you're right, th th. You're right, in th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. the. the. the. thea. the. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. toooooooo. too. th seasons. Look at me dropping to Seinfeld knowledge. I know, I feel like I should have gotten that one.
Bah.
Of the six episodes I've seen, he was one of them.
So she is a hospice nurse who comes to take care of Iris Blum, a horror author.
Who has no, oh no, she has like three lines.
Yeah. No one in this movie has thii, tha, tha, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. You, th. You, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho. You, tho. You're, too. You're, tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. You, the. You're, this movie has any goddamn lines, but Alice Morgan.
What is her name, Lily?
Yes, Lily Taylor.
Lily Taylor.
She has all the lines.
It's pretty much a monologue from her.
A very slow monologue.
Spoken in a monotone.
It's so Emily Dickinson, everything she said.
Yeah.
This movie is like equal parts Shirley Jackson and Emily Dickinson. And I I I, I'm just tickling my golf bone just being like, yay!
See, I love Shirley Jackson, not that fit, Emily Dickinson, GTFO.
You know what I'm saying? She was, come on.
So everyone's got like, the Smiths or like something that they got into when they were 15 and felt bad about themselves. They were like, mm, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I'm th, I thi, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I I th, I th, I th, I I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, I'm, like, I'm, like, I that they got into when they were 15 and felt bad about themselves they were like oh this is the thing that I'm into and like
Emily Dickinson is just that thing that like hit me wow yeah that's a very
strange yeah I know yeah for a dude who is real and a metal at that point in
time and Emily Dickinson all right I just doesn't want to sit under a tree with no leaves on it writing poetry.
Me. Oh yeah, okay, most people, yeah, most people don't want to do it.
That's not a thing I want ever.
You know what I'm not that into?
Hmm.
Poems?
Poems?
Poems?
Plooms? But I just love all of her, like, the whole, like, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, I'm just, I just, I'm. That, I just, I just, I, I, I have heard myself say that the house with a death in it can never be, blah, blah, blah.
You didn't find that pretentious?
Oh, as hell!
Okay, okay.
I want to lay this groundwork.
Oh, this is the arsees, farcest, farts.
This is the arsees, far theest, I think, mostly arts. Maybe that's why everyone was blurry when they were...
Maybe.
It was all toots.
I liked that.
Oh yeah, it was creepy as hell.
This movie is very aesthetically pleasing,
but leaves me with many questions.
Very atmospheric.
Yeah, sure, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So she's the hospice nurse coming to take care of Iris. What year do you think this is? It feels like one of those things at the bottom,
it should have said present at the beginning of it.
Do you think so?
Any day, anytime.
Yeah, yeah.
It was making me kind of mad that I couldn't figure it out.
Because she's wearing a grateful to be, because they're the worst. Really? They're the worst? You can think of nothing worse than the grateful
dead. Like, post drugs or Smith. Sir, have you heard of Ed Sheeran? No, I'm 43.
That Ed Sharon's long came on the radio while I was driving the baby to day care the other day and she burst into tears and I was like, that's right. I assume Ed Sharon sings that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that that that that that that that that that that that that that Shearin sings that your beautiful song.
Yeah.
It's pretty much, yeah, pretty close.
That one?
Yeah, no, basically.
Yeah, the guys are like peanut butter at the top.
Yeah, oh, oh, tongue.
You know what it's like to be all tongue.
Oh, wait, ah. Did you guys see that? All tongue. All tongue. You know what it's like to be all tongue?
Oh wait, ah.
Did you guys see that?
Um, yeah, so she's got the dead shirt on.
She, like, Bob Bellarmant's car is like a 1970s, early 80s type ride.
And he's a wealthy enough dude, because he's the, he's her agent, right He just seems to be the executor of her estate, but I don't know.
Yeah, I assumed he was her agent, but maybe he's just her, yeah, the executive.
No, maybe, who knows?
So I would think he would have like, whatever, a current model of automobile.
But I thought it was strange because she was, when she was one of those really long chords like your mom used to have, which is like, my, you know what I mean? Like, my generation.
Your generation wasn't the cordless phone?
I mean, by the time I was in like high school, but we had like a rotary.
So I don't know, I don't know, I don't know when this takes place.
The book that she'ss or the 80s. It was interesting because I can't decide whether she's like very childlike or old-fashioned
or this is taking place in the past or like, I felt like I couldn't place her as a person
in a history of the country of America.
With all of her weird, like corks and stuff.
Like silly Billy. Yeah.
Silly Billy. What? Get out of here. I think she's supposed to feel a little to feel a a little to feel a little to feel a little to feel a little to feel a little to feel a little to feel a little to feel a little to feel a little to feel a little to feel a little to feel a little to feel a little to feel a little a little a little a little a little a little a little a little thi thi thi thi thi thi. A little thi. A little thi. A little thi. A little thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the their, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thi. A thi. I thi. I thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. thi. thi. thi. out of here. I think she's supposed to feel a little bit out of time and like very naive,
because she's very terrified of everything.
Yeah, that's true.
She can't stand, like she said, she read the first nine pages of one of Iris Blum's book and then couldn't get any further into it.
And it left a bad taste in her mouth.
Well, bully for you.
You know what she would hate this fucking podcast?
She loves to laugh.
Does she?
No.
I don't think so.
She's pretty, pretty morose.
It's kind of.
One more thing. They also like introduce her having this fiance that they broke up,
but for like no real reason.
Her ex, Scott.
Scott, yeah.
Never marry a Scott, though.
Sorry to all the Scots out there,
they just like hockey.
Do you know what I mean?
They're just dudes who like hockey.
Is that where you want to spend the rest of your life?
With Scott watching the red wings?
Like, I don't know.
Well, she'd be watching them Bruins are up on Braintree Mass.
Oh, you're right. See, I blew it.
Why don't I see myself out?
I don't like a hockey, so I don't know.
I'm not Scott.
Never accuse Katie of being Scott.
I mean it, I don't.
And they establish that she has at least a friend.
Yeah.
Because she calls her.
Yeah, on the phone with a long cord that gets ripped out of her hands.
I like that.
I love the tense, like, you know something's going to happen,
but you're not quite sure what it's going to happen.
Yeah, it seemed like someone was sneaking up behind her No, not at all. I just thought that was weird.
Maybe that's just her sleeping shirt, like she got it for free.
She was like...
Uh, yeah, all the lacrosse guys in my high school really liked the dead,
and I just have that locked in my brain, because they were also very rude to me.
Oh, I'm sorry. As most sportsmen's were in high school. Yeah. See, to me, it's just like dudes who live next door to me in college and played a lot of
Hackey sack, and I find that to be just like totally unobjectionable, you know.
It is funny when I try to pull a dead song.
All I can pull is sublims.
I don't practice Santa the tria song.
That's good. I thought I'd ask. What if? What if?
What if it turn out you just had like a secrets off spot for sublime?
Look at this pukershell necklace, of course I do.
That's cool. Looks cool.
Um... It's like Owen Wilson from anaconda.
But just inside the snake.
Iris keeps calling her Polly.
Yeah, but her name is Lily so it it's almost like, maybe she crays.
Right, and we're assuming that Iris has like dementia or something along those lines, like...
She's not presented in such a way that you would think she has all her marbles.
That's the way I would think of it.
And then 11 months go by.
Yeah, they're just like, bap, bap. It seems to me that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that to me that that that that that that th is th is th is th is th is th is th is thi lilililililililili lili lily is th is th is th is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is the th is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th by. Yeah, they're just like, bop, baa, baa. Um, it seems to me that Lily spends all of those 11 months just talking to herself.
Yeah, and not going out of the house?
Yeah. She didn't have a car.
How those groceries get in there?
I don't know. They didn't have post-meats.
You talked to yourself? Uh, do I talk? No. I have so many dogs and cats in this goddamn house that I don't need to.
It's true. Talking to your pets is sort of like a replacement for talking to yourself to yourself.
Yeah.
I'm married to a replacement for talking to yourself.
I like, I like, don't know.
I'm like, to ter to yourself. Oh really? Oh God I'm like please just be quiet. I'm awesome. It could be the deuce talking to me I don't know. I'm
also in a relationship with one who's a quiet talker to herself and I'm like
muttering. What? No I wasn't talking to you. Well it was out loud. Yeah I'm the only other one in the room so like, you thrown. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to be to be the to be to be to be to be to be they's to be to be they's a to be to be to be a to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to to to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be toooooooooooooooooo. I too. I talking to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to you ever go in the grocery store and you see someone just being like, oh, ketchup, ketchup, ketchup, ketchup, ketchup, ketchup,
like, can your mouth just not keep it in?
I assume that's why they have those earpieces
with microphones on them, that you're just not actually talking to anyone
when you're just talking to yourself.
Ketch up.
I feel like to see what the Venn diagram overlap of those three. I mean, Scots and hockey vans are just
in one. One, that's one circle. That is just a circle. Self-talkers, I bet is all over the place. So at the beginning it was established that she is 28 years old. And she will not live to th. the. th. th. ilers at the top? I do. To me, that felt very, uh,
Shirley Jackson.
Very Shirley Jackson, very HP Lovecraft, like,
I've been dead this whole time.
I'm just gonna let you know that at the beginning so you're not shocked by the end.
Buckle in because I'm dead. Yeah. She is, she's die. She's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very. She. She. She. She. She. She's. She's, very. She's, very. She's, very. She's, very. She's, very. She's, very. She's, very. She's, very. She's, very. She's, very. She's, she's, very. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, she dies. Spoilers for this movie. But Bob Balaban, god damn, beautiful name, shows up.
It is, it's like a poem, but I don't like poems.
It's like a song, but not a grateful dead song.
Very specific about what you do and do not enjoy.
And not pocky.
So he shows up for the, presumably the first time in this 11-month period? Yeah, why wasn't he visiting anything? I don't th. And th. And th. And th. And th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to- to- to- to- to-up, it is is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is, it is is, it is, it is, it is is is, it is, it is is, it is, it is to to be is to be is to be is to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be tho. thi. tho. the. the. the. to too. to to too. toe. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to ththe first time in this 11 month period? Yeah, why wasn't he visiting anything?
I don't know.
I don't know.
And what was he even there for just to check in?
Because that's a long time to go without checking in if you're just going to check in?
I think because she had called him because she had noticed that there is a mold and drip situation in the house. Right. There's a lot of like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like thing thing thing thing thing thing thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thri. thri. thri. their their their their their thri. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. thri. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thri. thri. thri. to thri. to to thri. to thri. thri. thri. thri. thri. thri. thri. to thri. thri. thri. their thri. to to to fingering of paint bubbles and... Yeah, just slow, silent fingering of paint bubbles.
So if like, that's your thing you're gonna love this film.
Film, camera.
Digital.
So he shows up and she's like, who's Polly?
And I'm like, you've waited 11 months to ask this question.
Get on that long-corted phone and ask. Hook it up to a modem.
Put your computer box into it.
Yeah.
It turns out Polly is the main character
in The Lady in the Walls.
Yeah.
Her most popular book, Iris Bloom.
Yeah, she's got a bunch of copies of it.
What's her most popular?
It's true. I like that's that's had the exact same spine. Yeah, I love
that sort of uniformity and an author sort of thing. Yeah, that's classy.
So this... The cat who books? The cat who books? Is that some Dr. So shit? No.
There's a there's a subsect of people out there who know what I'm talking about. Okay.
They're like mysteries that a man solves through the help of
his cats. Oh, like a cozy mystery. Yeah, they're for grandmas. My nunna loves
them. I mean I'm almost there. Yeah, I think I have a couple from her that I can loan you. Loan I want them back. I get a text from friend from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from from. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I'm. I their. I their. I. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I got a text from friend of the podcast Jim Robinson the other day was like, hey Jim. Yo, can I get together with you and Katie and talk about
British crime dramas because I don't have anybody to talk about them with. I would
love to do that. Maybe that'll be a bonus episode. Who are we gonna like people
donate to us and if they donate they get an episode of us to a British crime dramas. Oh I do I do I I I I I I th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th to th to to to to to to to to th to th th th to to to to the tho like tho tho to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. Oh I th. Oh, I th. Oh, I th. Oh, I th. I th. I the the the try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try to to try to to to to to they get the if they double donate they get the ASM horror episode. Which during which I'm just going to be brushing my teeth. Is
that what it is? Is that cool? You're the one who's watched the videos? I know. Instead
of brushing my hair, I'm going to brush my teeth though. Talk through like, what you're going to do today at work work. Work. Work. Work. Work. Work. Work. Work. Work. Work. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. W. the, th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho. thoom. thoom. thoing the. Is thoing thoing thoing thoing tho. Is tho. Is tho. Is tho. Is th. Is th. Is th. Is th. Is th. Is th. Is th. Is, th. Is, th. Is, th. Is, th. Is, th. Is, th. Is, th. Is, th. Is, th. Is, th. Is, th. Is the. Is the. Is the. Is the. Is the. Is the. Is the. Is the. Is the. Is thee. theee. Is thee. thi. thi. thi. the. the. Is the. Is th brush. Wow, it's impossible to whisper with a toothbrush in your mouth, I bet.
Anyway.
So...
There's not like a lot to this movie, to be fair.
No. No, as we stated, it is all atmosphere and monologues.
And just being very delicate.
Yeah. Just so delicate.
I feel like almost like you know how
British people when they do American accents, their elocution is amazing.
Everything is just delivered like this. They are very... I feel like her acting
was reflecting of that too. She's like I bet her American act. So everything was
very... Just so. Yeah it was very well thought out. Every movement seemed to be planned. Yeah. I'm sure there were eight other words tho words that I could th th th th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the the the their the the the the the the their the their the they their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their they their they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're the. the. the. the. thee. theeeeee. theeeat. theee. theeeeeat. their their their their their their the it was very well thought out. Every movement seemed to be planned.
Yeah. I'm sure there were eight other words that I could have used.
Well, I liked the way he did it by just moving. You guys don't know his, but Alan just moved his arms in a slightly like
robot motion, which is not wrong. Can we talk about Polly? Please? What's the deal with Polly? Her husband murdered her. Yeah, I get that. Why?
Why do you bother building that house?
Okay, let me set up this scene.
Go.
Polly is wandering around this newly built house in her old timey garb.
Victorian?
I would say so, yeah.
Wearing a blindfold.
Sure.
She's wandering around and around, and she touches something on the wall and it hurts
her finger. She gets a boo-boo and it starts bleeding. She takes off the blindfold, looks
at the hole in the wall that's like unfinished boards basically. Yeah. She sees that
there's a gap. She looks resigned, like she knows what's coming. She turns to her husband. He looks at her, he's like, I guess. And he kills her with a hammer. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She th. She th. She th. She th. She th. She th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's h h h h he's he's he's he. She hurts thi. She hurts th. She hurts th. She hurts th. She hurts hurts hurts hurts hurts. She hurts hurts. She hurts hurts hurts. She hurts. She hurts. She hurts. She hurts. She hurts. She hurts. She hurts. She hurts. She hurts. She hurts. She hurts. She hurts. She's h h h h h h h h h h h h h h h. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's thi. She's th. She's th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. She turns to her husband. He looks at her. He's like, gotta do it. She's like, I guess. And he kills her with a hammer.
Or an axe, a hammer. A bludge, a large swinging object. Yeah.
Why? Well, I think the blindfold was like, hey, I want you to go around the house and for the first time you experience it.
Because this was on the wedding wedding day, as is established in the backstory that we get.
And he was like put on the blindfold and go wander around the house.
So she's taking like these tiny little steps and shuffling around as not to fall down a flight
of stairs, I assume.
And yeah, so I don't know why the murder happens. But I really enjoyed, like, that was like super tense, like for me.
I was like, what is going to, what's going on?
Yeah, it just doesn't, I want to know why.
I want to know like, first of all, was she expecting it?
Because she is not shocked by it.
And second, like, why did he go bother building her the house?
Because he disappeared too?
And third, why do they get married that day? And then he kills her and I mean he clearly was planning it.
He didn't build the house that day.
Yeah, I wonder if it was like she was wealthy and he stole her money and
like needed the alibi of building the house so it didn't look like he.
Because they, like the townsfolk thought that both of them had run off. Or just disappeared. But then you don't get money when you disappear. That's not how estates work.
Oh yeah, I guess not.
Yeah.
Unless she had all like, cash gold coins.
Yeah, she just had bags with money signs on them.
I don't know.
I just didn't, I felt like that could have been flushed out.
Sure. Fleshed out, not flushed out. their thushed out. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the, the, the, th. the, the, the, their. their, their, their, their, their, the, the, their, their, their, their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. to. their. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. this definitely suffers from not having,
from just being so atmosphere focused.
There's no story.
There's no story.
Except that there's a ghost and it's gonna scare you to death.
And oh, is that what happened?
She got scared to death?
I thought the mold got her.
Because she gives that monologue about how it was unseasonably warm and then she like dies. Yeah, I mean she sees the ghost but I thought it was the mold.
I think the mold was maybe supposed to be driving her insane. Because at one point she like sees a spot of the mold on her finger.
Oh yeah, her arms and she's washing the berries. Yeah. She gets like the pustules all over arms but it's just a hallucination. She gets all rotty. Yeah. What is it with rotting?
What?
Yeah.
What do you mean?
What is it with rotting?
I don't know.
It's creepy, it's gross.
No, sure.
And like, I got that part.
Unseasonally warm, wet area.
Yeah, I get that.
That's the mold.
You're going to blowed arms. Maybe, fine. But yeah, it's just that super gross shot, like the most special effecty shot in the entire movie, of her arms being swollen and having pustules all over them and mold and
she's just washing some berries. Can I ask another question? Go. When she sees the ghost and then dies,
she opens her mouth real big? Yeah. Is that CGI or is she open her mouth that big?
I think that was just she's got a big trap.
She can just open her mouth big?
I feel like the dentist is like open wide.
Oh my god, not that wide.
It was so big. It was shocking.
That's all.
Yeah, I think she's just like a kind of big-mouthed person. That weird upper lip. Yeah.
But she's got a-
Peels back and it's this gaping maw.
What was that movie that we did about the lady with dementia that like turned into a snake
person?
Oh, yeah, that was terrible.
Uh, Dolores Clayborne.
Something along those lines. People right now are like yelling at their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thiolk, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. I thi. We just just just just, thi. She's, thiiiii. We just just just just just just just, thi. We just just just just just just just, thi. We just just just just, thi. People right now are like yelling at their device,
like you fucking morons.
Deborah Logan.
Yes.
Yeah.
Close.
Snake mouth.
Snake mouth.
Snake mouth.
That's what it's logged in my brain to.
Yeah.
I love the, so she's reading the lady in the walls.
And there's a monologue, course from Polly Perkins and Parsons. Why do I know that? I don't know shit for shit. You got that one.
I got that one. I forgot how to get here. It's been two weeks. But I love the line.
I left the world just as I came into it. I am wearing nothing but blood.
Yeah that was deuce. And I was like, fuck, that is a fucking good line.
To be fair, though, you're born wearing more than blood.
Sure.
All this shit all over you.
Oh no.
Oh no.
But remember when we decided that, never mind.
So yeah, Polly Parsons, scares our lady to death. the thoughs. thiii sa, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. toe. th. th. toe. th. th. toe. th. toe. th. to bea. to bea. to bea. to bea. th. th. to bea. to bea. to bea. to bea. to bea. to bea. to bea. to bea, to bea, to bea. to bea. to bea. to bea. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. toe. toe. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. the. the. the house. She's got a backwards feet. She does, she walked herself in circles.
Do you like that?
I thought it was a little on the nose for a metaphor.
It was and it looked like disconcertingly silly when you see it.
And you're like, oh, that, like, if that had been in a house suit, I would be like,
oh, this makes perfect sense.
But she was literally walking with backwards feet. Yeah. Which on one you know I was like that's a little creepy and then on the other I just look like a child in a trench coat you know like
like, but one's facing the wrong way. She was going to sneak into a movie.
Like the horse like the back end of a horse or something you know in a costume. Yeah to it look because she's translucent at the time that you you you you you th you you you th you. th you. th you. th. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the the the. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the. Yeah. the. the. the. the. the the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I. I. I. I. I. the. I. I. I. I's. I's. I's. I's. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. t. I. I. t. t. I. t. I. t. t. I. I. t. I. t. I. the. the. I. the. I. I. the. I. the. the. the time that you see it and it just looks very very odd. How did you feel about the flashbacks?
Which ones? Will we see the young Iris Bloom?
And she's typing away and like-
I mean she was 100% supposed to be Shirley Jackson, right?
Yeah, of course.
Like, this was like a Shirley Jackson biopick,
except unauthorized and making of no sense.
Yeah, there's a review of it where they have the line, the most atmospherically faithful adaptation
of a Shirley Jackson book that was never, that never existed.
It's like, yeah, that's spot on.
That's it.
But she even has like the Shirley glasses and the Shirley hair.
Yeah.
I'd assume Shirley Jackson smoked.
Oh yeah, and drank.
Oh yeah, and eight drank and smoked herself to love those things. She looked to party. Pretty much eight drank and smoked herself to death, this is my understanding.
I mean if you're going to go.
Go big.
Party.
Yeah.
Um, as Andrew W.K.
I'll vote for him when he runs for president.
Oh, 100% nice man.
Positive attitude.
Seems like a nice man.
Yeah.
So. So, did you hear that conspiracy theory that he's not the original Andrew WK?
Well, it's something.
You can look into that.
Is this like the two Luke's theory that Ned just told us about?
Yes, I forgot all about that and yes.
But I liked the whole thing of like, Polly is literally telling Iris about her life,
because there's the whole thing where Iris didn't finish the lady in the wall out of respect for Polly.
Oh right, she doesn't want to ask her how she died.
Right? Yeah, because she couldn't remember it.
And then there was a whole thing.
Oh, that's why she kept looking backwards.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Flashpicks?
Hmm.
That doesn't make sense.
No.
I don't like it.
Again, one of the things that falls apart in this movie.
This movie is not meant to stand up to analysis, I don't think, right?
No, I think it's... And then you, da da da da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, it, it, it, it.. It, it. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It. It. It. It. It's. It. It. It's. It. It. It's. It. It's. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It da da da da. Yada yada.
Yada.
I was watching a show the other day and someone was doing an auction and to mimic auctioneers
speak they just said bigety bigety bigotty and made me laugh really hard.
Yeah, I'm into that.
Oh, the 100 bigity, biggity, bickety biggity.
Yeah, I like that. I watch a lot of TV. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's. It's. It's thi. It's. It's. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's th. It's th th th th th th th th thi. I'm th thi. I'm th th th th th thi th thi thi thi. I'm the. I'm the the the the the the the the the th-diggity-bick-a-bick-a-weeat. Yeah, I like that.
I watch a lot of TV.
It's wintertimes.
Yeah.
I was like, you should probably be reading books, or you could start season four of Buffy the Vampire
Slater.
There you go.
So Lily passes away, had a fear and or mold.
I think is fair.
And there was a repair man that was coming.
Yeah.
The day, a couple days after she died.
He was coming on Monday.
I'm not sure, I guess she probably died on like Saturday.
That feels like a weekend death today.
Yeah, because by the time he gets there, there's already flies.
Okay, sure.
And then we've had up the steps. And sadly, Mrs. Bloom has also died. Yeah, that was rough.
Yeah, because she died like ringing the bell.
The bell was next to her.
Seems like she maybe tried to get out of bed.
Yeah.
I just bit it.
Very sad.
But we also see Lily coming down the stairs.
Because she's a ghost now.
So I want to talk house. Is it? Yeah. Do you reset when you become a ghost?
Reset to what though?
I guess the first time the house saw you.
I guess, yeah, like, otherwise you would just be wearing nothing but blood, like a baby.
But if you're, all ghosts had an umbilical cord.
Isn't that what the movie Donnie Darko is about? Yes. You're right. Someone got to that idea first.
Topical.
She should be happy that she didn't get stuck in the Grateful Dead t-shirt for eternity.
It would be way compier though than wearing like a cardigan over a button down.
Oh, it did look like a script because it was all, she wears all white, even though her, uh... She doesn't have to it's not a prerequisite of the job but she you're just so mad the
grateful dead like maybe you just need to mellow out man I grew up at a
college town that's true oh Delaware too a lot of white baseball caps and
jeeps I feel man a lot of Dave Matthews band yeah yeah I guess maybe that was
maybe I actually my existence in the college and I've got her predated, DMB really taken off.
I mean Dave.
Is that what the call? I'm gonna alienate those folks too. You guys suck.
See, that's the thing. I'll stand by the crash song. I'm not so mad at that song. Once I used to have a blog in the early to mid-2000s,
it was just a personal blog where I wrote dumb comedy stuff I guess basically
and about my life and drinking a lot and I said something negative about Dave
Matthews and somehow one of his fans found it and posted it on the
official Dave Matthews message board and these motherfuckers descended on me and said the most horrible things you can think
of about who I am as a person. So I went to the forum to see like what when they
were saying there because I could see like all the links were coming over
from on my website and I couldn't get there because you got to pay to post
on the Dave Matthews forum so So you know what? Jokes on you, motherfuckers.
Jokes on you.
From 12 years ago.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They can put down the devil sticks long enough to go and type on the computer?
Wow, devil sticks. Also the wrong era.
We've... All right, well, we made some enemies, or at least I have.
They're mine too.
I'll take them too.
Thanks.
Hate me, hate mea.
You want to hate thrown.
You want to hate throwne.
I like they're just trying to end this.
I like they're just trying to end this. No way way to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, their, their, their, their, to, their, thea, I, try. to, I'. to, I, I, to, to, to, I'. to, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, to. I, I, I, to. I, I, to. to. to. to. to. to. to, try. try. try. try. try. to, try. try. to. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. to. to, to. to. love controversy. It's true. Maybe we need to stir up. We need to be more dramatic. Like, maybe we need to be more like a cast number of real housewives of something. Real housewives
of Braintree, Massachusetts. I could just do my mainer accent. Can't remember not do it now? Ayah? Yeah. Ah, yeah. It's a noise. That's how I have to get into it. Yeah. Yeah, there the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I t. I t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I the. I the. I. I. I. to, that's how I have to get into it. Yeah, there you go.
So we see Lily as the blurry ghost at the very end.
Yeah.
And she's eating something white and ropey?
She was chewing on her hand.
That's what she was, she was like a nervous tick for her.
Or like, almost.
In the afterlife, the taphy? Are you gonna sing that song? Do you sing? What do you sing? Alephattaffi? Yeah.
Yeah, that's the one.
Yeah, I think she was like biting on her knuckles or something.
It seemed like it was a nervous habit.
But it didn't really play all that well in the blur.
Yeah, because I definitely thought she just had something like, I thought it was like, Do you remember, do you remember, do you remember back in the turn of the last century with the...
So there were the mediums that would like do seances for people and they would hide like intestines in their mouth and be like, oh it's ectoplasm and start pulling that like long one.
How do you hide intestines in your mouth? Because they're just like deflated like basically if you just had sausage skins with no sausage in them? No, no, don't put that in your mouth, you're fucking grossos?
Well, they would hide at other places too.
Like in their butts.
Mm, or they're...
They're peaholes.
Yeah, their peahs.
Yeah, just a groles.
You were just gesturing it a peeper. But that's what I was like, is it supposed to be ectoplasm? Is it supposed to, but like, it's just a gripper?
Yeah, just a gripper.
I like that, gripper.
Yeah, that's the movie.
That's the movie.
That's the movie.
I'm the pretty thing.
Oh, there's a lot of, wait.
There's a lot of like being beautiful and that not lasting. Sure. Okay.
Is that why the husband killed her?
She's not beautiful.
This is the most beautiful you're going to be.
I hope not.
She looked very beautiful.
She did.
And he had this weird shitty sideburn.
He's not one to judge.
He's an old guy.
And she was a young, beautiful woman. someone killed you at the height of your attractiveness, or maybe it's to save you from your uglies later.
I don't know.
The beautiful house, too.
Yeah.
Would live in that brain tree house?
You have to live in brain tree.
I like the term, the name brain tree for something.
Yeah, silly.
What are some of the other, but I can't think of mold. But maybe that's also something beautiful rotting away the house.
True, true.
Oh, we forgot to mention.
So there's an opening shot of a flashlight going around the house.
Is there?
Yeah.
Tell me more.
And it goes, well it's a light.
I don't know if that's a flashlight.
But it goes, pans right past him.
And then that exact same shot is done again at the end of the movie because a new family
has moved into the house. But she's not going to haunt them, I guess. I think she is haunting them. But she says something like she's going to tha tha tha tha tha th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi's thi, thi, thi, the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their thi, their their their their their their their their their their their their, their their their thi, thi, thi, thi. And, thi. And thi. And thi. thean. thean thean thean thean thean thean thean thean thean thean thean thean just gonna stay here and observe or whatever. Creep? Yeah.
I'll just like to watch.
But that goes into my theory that you're correct,
this does take place in the past because that family
when they move in have like very modern looking cars.
Oh, do they? Yeah.
I feel like if I'm a ghost yeah, definitely. I'm gonna get annoyed and fuck with people.
Like Beetleju style.
Whoa, you're gonna go that far.
If I could pull my own face off, God damn, believe me, I would.
You wouldn't just be, uh, Jita Davis and that other guy?
Albaulton?
Yeah, that's the one.
They pull their faces, the stretchy faces. Man, I love that movie. Oh my God, yeah. Yeah.
Nice fucking model! That is Michael Keaton at the most Michael Keaton. He's wonderful. He really
is. He's a treasure. I bet he's also sad about Andrew McCutcheon. You think? Is he a big sportsman?
Big Pirates Hand? Okay. Yeah. I'm sorry for your loss, Michael Keaton. We know you're listening.
Might be.
Someone's sending this to Michael Keaton.
Get Michael Keaton on the horn.
Well, he now knows how much we enjoy Beetlejuice.
Do you want to tell the people about how we fail to build?
And the beautiful thing that lives in the pretty house? I think what you just said, are we going, are, are, are, are, are, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thing, get, thing, get, thing, thing, thin, get, thin, get, get, get, thin, get, get, thin, get, the thin, th, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get. thi, get. thi, get. thi, get. thi, get. thi, get. thi, get. thi, get. thi, get. thi, get, get. thi, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, the the the the the the the they. I they. I they. they. they. they. they. thin, get they. the thin, get they. thin, get they. th th thin, get we going to the ratings face?
Hey Katie, why don't we have?
We're going to a ratings face.
All right, I guess I'll read it.
I think what you just said is a pretty good summation of the movie, which is to say long and
flowery, but doesn't mean anything.
Sure.
It's beautiful.
And it was, I like watched it fascinatedly. Okay.
But then it ended and I was like,
also when she dies, I was like,
oh, there's 15 minutes left, something's gonna happen.
No, no.
Then an ambulance is gonna show up.
And like, we're gonna see them take out the bodies in real time.
A little bit more Bob Balaban at that point. Yeah, I guess I'll take some more Bobbobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobob. the they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. their's they. they. their's, their's, their's, their's, their's, their their there's. there's. there's. there's. there's. their. their. their. their. their. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. they. they. they's they's their their their the I can get it. I mean this movie's fine. I can see why people would love it. I can see what people would hate it.
Yeah. I feel smack in the middle. Okay. Fiver. Fiver.
Fiverino. This is my second time watching this film. And the first time I was very much in the camp that you're in. I was very much in a Fiverino. This time I'm at a seven. I'm at. I'm at a seven. I'm at a seven. I'm at a seven. I'm at a seven. I'm at a seven. I'm at a seven. I'm at a seven. I'm at a seven. I'm at a seven. I'm at a seven. I'm at a seven. I'm at a five. I'm at a five. I'm at a five. I'm at a five. I'm at a five. I'm at a five. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. F. I. F. I. F. F. F. I'm. I'm. F. I'm. I'm. I'm. F. F. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. t. I'm. t. I'm. I'm. t. I'm. S. I'm. I'm. I'm. S. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. time, I'm at a seven. You liked it, increased. Yeah, I think knowing what I was getting,
let me just soak up the atmosphere.
Right, you weren't expecting anything more.
And maybe I fixed myself some nice English breakfast tea,
I watched this in the morning, some nice tea,
and some lemon snaps, and I sat down, I was like,
I'm gonna watch this fucking movie right now. I might have a good old lady time watching this movie
with my T and my Lemon Snaps.
Yeah.
And I did, I had a really nice time.
I'm glad.
I just feel like sometimes you should have to write a movie.
You should have to like write it.
But of the movies that we've done that have not been written,
it's better. It's in the the the the the the the the the the the the the wrote that down. Daddy, can we pay the ghost?
What?
Fuck you!
What are you talking about, kid?
Did you see that someone recently, someone recently laid into us about our review of the
wicker man?
Who?
Tell me more.
I'll show you.
It's on our Instagram.
Oh my god, I'm so excited.
Of course he's acting like a maniac. He's just just, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to to to to to to to to to to to toooooooooooooooooooo. too. to a maniac. He's a father who's just found out that he has a child that he's never seen.
I was like, what in defense of the wicker man?
Is this our mail bag for this week?
No, because it was stale along and I don't want to read them.
I don't want to read it either.
I just want to be summated, which sounds like this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this guy this guy this guy this guy this guy this guy this guy this guy this guy this guy this planet agrees with us. So like, you can't just be contradictory about, you know.
The bees, about the bees.
The bees.
I mean, how did it get burned?
How did it get burned?
Thank you for listening and for commenting and getting in touch with us,
but come on.
I bet that guy likes hockey too.
He was named Scott Scott.
Scott Scott. I do want to say that we've gotten some emails.. I the the the to. I, to.. I, to, to, to, to, to, the to, to, to, to, the to, the the to, the to, the to, to, to, to, to, to, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the bees, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. the. the. thea, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thease bease. thease. thea, thease. Scotson. I do want to say that we've gotten some
emails lately and I've been you know in a case of the winters recently. Yeah it's
fucking winter. And so I have not been good about getting back to people and I
apologize for that. Oh sorry I could also help with that and I just don't.
So maybe we'll get a better system. Although I like to pop into Facebook every now and then just like write a bunch of comments at once and th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And they. And I. And I. And I. And I. And I. And I. And I. And I. And I's, I's, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I, th. I, th. I'm, the th. I'm, thi. I'm thi. I'm the. I'm the. the. te. I'll. te. toe. toe. toe. toe. to to the. I the. I'm th. I'm th. to pop into Facebook every now and then and just like write a bunch of comments at once and then leave again for weeks
You're the pretty thing that lives on the Facebook
But my comments are all in caps and with a bunch of exclamation points, so very unlily like
But thank you to everybody who's gotten in touch recently and send us emails and I'm gonna get back to you soon We're gonna get on it listen. It's gonna be like 50 degrees this weekend. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the the the to. the to. the the they. they. they. they. they. they. they. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the they. th. they. the their. their. their. their. their. their. their. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. th. th. th. th. th. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. th. th. the. I. I. th. I. I'm. I'm. I. I'm. I'm. I'm gonna get back to you soon. We're gonna get on it. Listen, we'll get to it. It's gonna be like 50 degrees this weekend, I'll be fine.
Is it? Nice.
Now it's a great time to answer emails.
It's nine right now.
You know what the real feel is?
The real feel is one.
That's a degree.
It's a tell you about some exciting news.
You like to be spooked.
A little bit.
You like chasing that scare dragon?
I guess so.
You like the pretty thing that lives in your house?
Ooh, yeah.
This movie gave me the creepies a little bit too.
Yeah, yeah. expected that sentence to end since I've seen this movie. I've been holding it for days. I'm also getting septic. If you subscribe to the Cryptocurium
parcel of terror by January 31st which is two days from today. 48 hours. You can sign up
for the hauntings box. What does that mean? You want to know what you can expect in
that thing?
That's what I'm asking, yeah.
No, define the words.
I can only answer questions that are on a website in front of me.
You can expect spectral sculptures and items inspired by true encounters with ghosts.
Ooh.
An exclusive illustration by Sam Heimer. I like his work. And an eerie story that
will make you sleep with the lights on. I already have a salt lamp next to my bed so there's
like a light on all the time anyway. I just got a salt night light because we talked
about nightlights in the sixth sense episode and I need to put it in the bathroom. It's still in a box. It's not doing me any good. There's no salt. You're a the salt. I. I. I. the the the the the the the the the the the th. I. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. I'll th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. to. to to to to t. to t it and I'm like, I gotta get to that. And then I don't go to the bathroom in the middle
night because I'm afraid. And to avert all these emails that we get, yes, I know a salt lamp doesn't like, doesn't do anything, but I really like the light that it puts off. So yes, it does do something.
It's not gonna make me healthy though.
I've heard they're helpful for migraine sufferers.
Oh, okay.
I mean, I don't know.
My therapist was real into be getting one.
Yeah.
Anyway. So this is the ad Jason paid for.
Jason from Crypto-U-R-I-U-M.
to-M. Medical malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad malad R, U, M. M. to M-U-M dot com medical maladies.
Problems we've got.
Let's talk about them.
Thank you, Jason for doing this, for sponsoring.
Yeah, and I hope you guys all go out and sign up for that,
because the parcel of terror is amazing.
Yeah, it's always beautiful.
You're always gonna be that sign up going. We live in a world where you get packages all the time.
You got your Amazon, you got your Hello Fresh,
you got your choo toys.
Your Hello Kitty, your Bark Box.
Your long hair and your beetle boots.
Get one more.
What's one more is what I'm saying?
Yeah, of what, of a, I mean,. I mean if you, for you, millennial
types out there, these are artisanly crafted items that you're going to get from this.
Your cheese of the month, blah. This single source individual is making these beautiful works of art for you.
He's an artist. Support art. He's a good dude and he supports support him supporting us. Support, let's all just lean on each other.
Let's make that Venn diagram of support, just one circle guys, come on.
Let's all be Scott.
The circle of life.
I think we nailed that one.
I think we did great.
Got five.
Oh yeah.
Katie.
Let's go back to the 1980s. Love the 80s. Let's watch a slasher movie from the 80s.
Isn't that all they made in the 80s?
Yeah, exclusively.
Exclusively slashers.
Yes, the hunger was a slasher movie here.
What was the hunger?
Oh, come on.
No.
Literally, that was It was wretched. Let's watch a slasher movie that I've never seen.
Oh you haven't! An 80s slash movie I've seen and you haven't. Yeah.
Prom night. Prom night.
Jamie Lee Curtis. And Leslie Nielsen. Oh!
Prom night starring Leslie Nielsen, Jamie Lee Curtis and a bunch of other people I assume.
I think just the two of them.
Oh, okay.
It's a two-hander then.
Yep.
So that is on Amazon.
I do believe.
You said it's free?
I do believe, but I've lied to us.
Sometimes you lie and then I'm out 299, you know?
So go watch that.
Oh, okay.
Mailbag!
Better, give it the respected deserves.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, Mailbag, I've just respected you once again.
Katie, do you want to hear the best message we received on Twitter recently? I would love to where Warewoof ambulance. It's like Amazon Prime knows me.
Guys, listen to last year's April Fool's episode for the bajillionth time.
Still laugh at everything and now I'm finally watching... Over the top.
Yes.
Yes. Alexandra Hill, you nailed it. I love Alexandra. She's very funny. She knows what's up. She knows what's good. And now she knows that she's seen over the top. And then we're the the the the their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. the the. the the. their. their. the. their. their. their. their. their. their. the. their. their. their. their. their. their. I's. I'. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. the. th. the th. I. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. to. t. the the the the now she knows that she's seen over the top.
And then we're going to meet her halfway.
Across the sky.
Oh, fuck, I got to watch over the top again.
So come back.
Maybe I'll just get the soundtrack.
So you can live over the top.
Go back next week.
We're going to talk about prom night, send us messages on the Twitter's and the Facebook's and emails and I'll get back to you, I swear.
And thank you for listening to another episode of Warewulf Ambulance.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.