Werewolf Ambulance: A Horror Movie Comedy Podcast - Episode 168- Arachnophobia (1990)
Episode Date: March 19, 2018This week we're getting into our worst fears (or at least Jeff Daniels' worst fears) with the 1990 creepy-crawly classic, "Arachnophobia." Special topics for your consideration include: facts about na...ture, objectifying such men as Julian Sands and Huey Lewis, a case of mistaken Jeffdentity, a tribute to Grandma from every movie, John Goodman's affect and an explanation of "The Secret." Did you miss our other animal horror films? Check out Episode 37- "Zombeavers," Episode 103- "The Fly," Episode 137- "Monkey Shines" and Episode 152- "Anaconda." Have you seen this one? How did you feel about it? And-- tell us your phobias! Let's get PERSONAL. Let us know your thoughts at facebook.com/werewolfambulance, on Twitter @werebulance or on Instagram @werewolfambulance. You can also email us for our segment "MAILBAG!" at werewolfambulance@gmail.com and if you're feeling super generous, leave us an iTunes rating and review.  Check out our sponsor this week as well: Cryptocurium (www.cryptocurium.com) where cool horror stuff gets handmade and then lovingly delivered to your door in the form of the Parcel of Terror on a monthly basis. You can also sign up for their secret society, The Order of the Thinned Veil, in which you can profess your love for all things Halloween and be rewarded handsomely for it! Werewolf Ambulance is a horror movie comedy podcast.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Alan, Katie. Can I tell you a story? Oh, please. I like, I know we're a comedy podcast and we've hit some serious notes at times.
Should I be, should I put piano music underneath this? Yeah, I'd like that? Okay. That's all they'll know what's serious instrument.
I like, I like, I know, the most serious instrument. Is it the most serious instrument I'd like that. That's all they'll know what's serious.
The most serious instrument.
Is it the most serious instrument?
Little next to the French horn.
There you go.
Just so morose.
Anyway, I want to tell you a story about my childhood.
Okay. I'm listening. It's a sad one.
I was probably about two years old.
And I was in my crib. Oh no.
And there was a horse and it came into my room.
And it was all going,
Ah!
Could you not move?
Could you not move?
I was paralyzed.
I was paralyzed and I felt it touching my naked baby leg.
Oh God.
And I couldn't move.
And I hate horses.
But does a horse sound like I just did it?
And it was.
Oh Wilbur?
That's better.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
And I made a movie called Equinophobia.
It stars Warlock.
And Dave Coulier. This era of Jeff Bridges really makes me think of Dave Coulier.
This era of Jeff Bridges really makes me think of Dave Coulier.
They're like Twainters.
Yeah, not Jeff Bridges, Jeff Daniels.
Who's Jeff Bridges?
Jeff Bridges is a big Lebowski.
Right.
Who is super handsome in the 70s and is now the cragliest man that's ever existed?
He like surpassed Tommy Lee Jones as the cragliest man ever.
Who's Jeff?
I can't even think of another Jeff Davis.
Jeff Davis.
Who is Jeff Davis?
The president of the Confederate States of America.
You're talking about Jefferson Davis.
We're on like a total first name basis. Me and Jeff.
Me and Jeff, old Jeff Davis.
My first note is Jeff Daniels and Julian Sands.
Finally.
Warlock.
I have a question about Warlock.
Shoot.
Is he hot?
Oh, you, from what I understand, yes.
Sometimes he is and sometimes he isn't.
He's a two-face.
Like from Seinfeld.
Starring Jeff Seinfeld.
I listened to a whole podcast the other day
where people were talking about how hot Hewy Lewis is.
And I was like, what fucking world am I living in?
I have a friend who's super into Huey Lewis.
I can't think of anyone that I find less attractive than Huey Lewis. Really no one's
uglier to you than Huey Lewis? Not ugly or just less attractive? I'm not ugly or just less.
I'm the ugly people too. Oh, I have no like physical attra-nothing for me. Hi, I'm Katie. Where will fan of ambulance this is it. Yeah, this is the the the the the the the the the the ugly. the ugly. the ugly. the ugly. the ugly. the ugly. the ugly. the ugly. the ugly. the ugly. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's is that's that's that's that's that's th. th. that's. I's. I's. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm Alan. I'm Katie. Wherewith Ambulance, this is it. Yeah, this is what you're getting.
We're talking about Erechnophobia.
Starring Jeff Bridges.
Daniels and Dave Cullier.
And Dan Jefferson.
And Warlock.
Hey, go back and listen to our first episode, Warlock.
Yeah, sorry about the reverb.
That's the one that's got the fucked up the f fucked out of the gates we fucked it up and then perfected it after that.
You know it took us we also re-recorded the ending of that one. Remember because we just didn't
have a rating system and I was like we need a raiding system and then now we've perfected it. A hundred thousand episodes later. Oh by the the the the th. We thousand th. We thousand th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We thi. We thi. We thi. We thi. We thi. We've perfect. We've perfected. We've perfected. We've perfected it. We've perfected. We've perfected it. We've perfected it. We also, we also, we also, we also, we also, we also, we also, we also, we also the, we also the, we also the, we also thi. We thi. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We also th. We also thed. We also theree. We also took took perfected. We also took perfected. We also took took took took took took took took took the the the ththis episode back to you guys. Bah, bappa, bapa, bapa, bappa, bapa, bappa, bapa,
I came back to tell you, there aren't any flying cars.
Still.
I mean, like, it's hard for air traffic control to manage that sort of automotive traffic.
It's just not, there's just no way to do it. It's just not practical. Arachnophobia, four minutes in.
I have to get this out of the way quickly
because no one will care about this.
Great, let's put it on the podcast.
When I was like 15, 16 years old,
I started going to heavy metal shows
for local bands in my hometown of Newark,
Delaware. And the big ofi of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of. of. of. of. of. to to to th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, thi, thi, thi, thi.. thi. thi. theeeean, thi. to thi. thei. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. I'm thi, I'm thi, I of the band called Freak Show and they had a song Arachnophobia. I would like to sing the part of Arachnophobia that is
permanently stuck in my head. Oh Racknophobia, little Miss Muffit sitting on a
tufit, yeah.
What, Sink? That's very good.
Sitting on her Tuffin.
Yeah.
They're like, what rhymes with a ragnophobia?
It's toughy.
Yeah.
Perfect.
Nailed it.
Got it.
They were the coolest band.
Wow.
Wow.
So every to watching this movement, I'm like, oh, oh, right.
The whole entire time, just.
Yeah.
Because that's still in my brain.
Math, gone.
That is still in my brain.
Well, you could just watch Cube and then you'll know.
Rewatch it.
Rewatch Cube, then you'll learn.
Don't make me re-watch cube. Yeah, it's way too long for a movie about spiders. Especially when you could lop a half hour out of it without blinking.
Uh-uh.
Yeah, there's nothing to-
That whole middle section?
Fong, out of here.
What even happens in the middle section?
I don't even remember.
John Goodman doesn't happen, so why are we watching this?
No. He's in it? No! I remember him having like walking in and wearing the suit with the gun and the backlighting.
I that's what I remember. I do not remember that he is Bill Murray from Caddashack.
He's totally boating that? So he's biting that so hard like a black widow. Do you know that uh
tarantulas can shoot poisonous hairs off of themselves at you? It's disgusting.
Spiders are terrifying.
There's a spider that's 12 inches across.
That's like the size of a terrier.
Yeah.
I thought the one at the end of this one was comedically large.
Although I remembered it being much bigger.
Really? It was really big.
It was absurd. You know this movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie movie the the movie movie movie movie is the movie is the movie is the movie is the movie is d. It is d. It is th. It is th. It is th. It is th. It's th. th. It's th. It's th. It's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. te. te. te. te. te. t. t. t. t. t. t. It was really big. You know this movie is directed about the same director as Congo.
And it shows.
Also, when I said that I wanted to do Congo,
we had a take her for a guest episode on that.
My friend Elena really wants to talk about Congo.
I love it.
Not exactly a horror movie, but we might be able to work it in. We should do Congo. We should do Congo. We should do Congo. We should do. We should do. We should do Congo. We should do Congo. We should do Congo. We should do Congo. We should do Congo. We should do Congo. We should do Congo. We should do th. We should do th. We should do th. We should do con go. We should do con go. We should do th. We should do to. We should. We should. We should. We should do congo. We should to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. We should do con go. We should do con go. We should do congo. We should do congo. We should tho. to. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. did hot fuzz. All bets are off.
We did a single white female.
That's a horror. That's a horrible movie.
We did love actually.
Did we? No, but it's a horror movie.
Well, that's what we'll do next week.
So this movie starts off very Jurassic Park and very Anaconda.
And very, very Congo too.
Oh really? Okay. Yeah. Yeah. The music is very
Jurassic Park at the beginning of it. Oh yeah. And the helicopter shots. And then it's pretty
much the first 10 minutes are just anaconda but brought down and with spiders instead of snakes.
Pretty much. That weird curly-haired man shows up out of nowhere. Yeah. I feel like he wasn't in the first couple scenes and they were like oh we need to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the the the they. they. they. Yeah. So. they. their. their. their. the the their. I. the the the the the the the the the the their. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. the. I. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the. the. the. the the the the't in the first couple scenes and they were like oh we need him and so he just shows up. You know why?
Why? He had glasses in the first couple of scenes. You know how I am with faces?
How are they going to be in the Amazon and not talk about the can dearer of fish?
Because it's not a movie. It's not a fish the fish. That fish goes up your peahole though. Always bring it up as a possibility. It's true.
Before we get really going on this, 10 minutes in or whatever we are, are a horse is your
biggest phobia? Yes. There's nothing I would less rather be stuck in a room with.
But maybe a boa constructor. You know what I mean? A horse I might be able to tame. A boat, can you reason with a horse? I don't know. I have no doubt that if if if if if if if if if if if if if if if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if, if, if, if, if, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their, their, their, th. their, their, th. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their, their, their, their, th. th. th. th. t. t. te. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. be able to tame. A boat, can you reason with a horse? I don't know.
I have no doubt that if you and a horse were locked in a room together and you came
back an hour later, you two would be best buds.
You'd think so?
Oh, you'd be friends on Facebook.
I don't even have a face.
You'd get one, please befriend. Will Fed me. Please, stout. I'm not accepting friends.
My biggest phobia is heights.
Would you be best friends if you were locked in a closet?
With heights?
The concept of high.
Love the concept of high.
Just not heights.
That's my new movie with Method Man and Red Man.
Concept of high.
They're in college together.
Do you like how high?
I've never seen how high.
I bet you'd like it.
Which is amazing.
I should have seen that.
I've seen the, I've seen like, what's the one with Dave Chappell?
You know, fuck you, fuck you, you.
You're cool. Yeah, where are you from in Jamaica? By the beach, Mon.
That fucking movie called.
Hold on, let's ask Google.
What's that Dave Chappelle movie about weed called?
I searched the web and found this movie.
Half baked.
Half baked. Thanks, Google.
Thanks, Googs.
Are these business bits we're doing?
We gotta get into this movie All right, so we start up in the Amazon.
Hunky, hunky Julia Stands is there.
Dr. Atherton.
I can't, I still don't know if he's hunky.
I'm not sold.
Okay, he's a little delicate for me.
It's a ponytail, I think.
It's a dick ponytail. But he's wearing it down when we first the hat. thap. thap. that. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. to is. to thi. too. too. thi. thi. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. to. the. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. the. the. true. He has the hat. That's true. Like a bucket hat. He's in the Amazon. Like he got it at a Pirates game, Free Bucket Hat Day. Is that a thing?
Yeah. They had free fedora night like two years ago. It was fucked. It was very, I don't think it was ironic.
Free full dumpster night. So there's beautiful mountains. This is filmed in Venezuela at the beginning of it.
It's really gorgeous.
It's got those waterfalls that just dissipate halfway down because the mountains too
god-dam high for them to go all the way down.
Is that why?
Yeah.
Yeah, by the time they're halfway down, yeah. Today I learned. Today you guys learned too, you didn't
fucking know that. Don't shake your head at me, internet listeners. Oh, speaking
of learning, the Carvel revelation. Yeah, people are... I've been thinking if anyone
wants to make a werewolf ambulance ice cream cake mold, I'd lose my fucking mind.
Just put it out there.
I have, okay, let me back this up.
I have a mold in the shape of a cat.
I could probably, I could probably jury rig it
to look like a wherwolf.
But like, you know, like Justin's logo,
wherewoolf head.
And I can't do that. I want that as a cake an that as a that as a thaaaaaaa tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha that is a that is a that is a thattauuia. that. that. that. that. that. thoom. thoom. thia. thooom. thoom. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. the tho. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm just throwing it out there. Well, here's a metal worker.
This is the, isn't this the secret?
I just put it out into the universe
and hopefully it'll come back to me.
Is that what the secret is?
I don't know.
Is that the tipping point?
What are you looking? We meet Mr. Manly, who is this dweeby dude.
He's coming to take photos.
I love his name Dolphins hat.
Do you?
Which is weird because he's from San Francisco.
Well, there's no sports.
Oh.
Oh.
Maybe that's to give him depth.
Depth of character.
Sure.
They're being led by some indigenous folks that'll only go so far. Right. There's Indiana Jones bugs all over the dolphins hat when it falls off his head. I like that. The weird like giant praying mantises and like
what's that smoke cannon that Julian Sandius? I don't know. It doesn't matter.
It's like a smoke cannon that knocks all the spiders out of the trees.
They were rather they're getting butterflies. And butterflies. Okay. Well, spiders were a spider. The's a spider. The. the spider. the spider. the spider. the spider. the spider. the spider. the spider. the spider. the spider. the spider. the spider. the spider. the spider. the spider. the spider. the spider. S. the spider. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. the spider. th. S. S. S. S. S. S. th. th. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. the. th. th., well, it's weird because he seems to be a butterfly expert, but then he's super into
the spiders.
And then he's a spider, the top spider expert in the world.
Okay.
Also, he's like, are they dead?
Are they dead?
I don't know.
It's this weird.
It's thisthis thing it would
kill an elephant. Well why you're now you're killing. I do it. Shut up Julian
Sands. You're just making it up as you go along. Yes he did feel like if his title was
best bug boy it would have made for me sense. These spiders are very aggressive. Why don't they th. they they they they they they they they they they they they they they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are th. they are they are th. they are they are th. they are they are th. they are like like. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. th. th. they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are. they are they are they are they are they are they are their. their. their th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. their. th. thi. thi. thi. their. thi. their. their. they are they are all. These spiders are very aggressive. Why do I even know that
says no spider dicks? Because they are all they are all Unix. They don't
reproduce. Because they much like in Anaconda, they are the warriors. They're not the
the queens. They don't mate with anybody. Anytime in these movies they start
talking about nature shit, I just 100% zone out.
Because I don't feel like I need to know.
Nature shit. Yeah.
So I'm not here for the nature shit.
So Manly is not feeling well when he shows up,
and then he gets even sicker.
Because I think the spider and him had some words or something.
And then he goes to lay down.
And these spiders,. I, the spider, the spider, the spider, the spider, the spider, the spider, the spider, the spider, the spider, thii spe, the spider, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thinks, thinks, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, they's thinks, they're thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks, thinks And then he goes to lay down. And these spiders are great because, like,
they're backing up all their gear to leave this valley
that they're in.
And the spider's just like, I got this.
And sneaks into a backpack.
And then sneaks out of the backpack.
And then he sneaks out of the back.
their backpacked to the at the beginning. Hardly knew you. No, yeah, it's fine.
And then his corpse is shipped back to California.
Yeah.
And when it gets back, it's completely desiccated.
Yeah, it looks cool.
It does look cool.
And that 80s Hurst that was driving him,
and through the opening credits.
So cool. It's like like a a a a a the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi's, thi. thi. thoooom. thoom. thoom. the. that's the. that's that's the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's the the the. It's the. It's a thea. It's thea. It's to. It's the the that. It's the the thea. It's the the thea. It's the thea. It's c. It's c. It's like a Ford LTD Herx.
Then we cut to a scene we've never seen before.
A family moves into a new house.
Go pick out your rooms, kids.
Also look at my note right there.
Could you read it aloud?
This era of Jeff Bridges reminds me of Dave Coulier.
What, want? Cut it out.
Yeah.
He's a doctor, and I bet they don't let us forget it.
They never let you forget that someone's a doctor, you know?
No, he does not.
He's not.
So the spider leaves the, has traveled in the coffin with the fellow.
That's why he's drained
of all of his fluids with Manly.
And then it gets picked up by a bird outside of the funeral home after it's chased the
cat who steals the sandwich.
It was like a very like, I'm like heading into a Dr. Seuss book.
But this bird flies for a while and then the spider kills the bird mid-flight. You would never.
Why would you? It's like, why would you, as I say, why would you bomb the plane that you're on?
But I guess that's terrorism.
It's the scorpion and the frog, man. Yeah.
Uh, I just noticed my note. So they move into their new house. And Jeff Daniels' wife, who is Molly.
I liked her. She was great. You know who she looked like?
Who's that? You're gonna like this. Brian from wings. Helen from wings.
She had a crystal Bernard look about her. And she's also wearing a pleaded shorts, colored shirt with rolled up sleeves under a sweater.
thate to a s-shoulder to look that I was obsessed with. Wow, that sounds like Tasha Yar in Pet Cemetery style look.
Yeah.
Molly wants to start putting the house together.
But Jeff Danos is like, mm-mm, so I have the note.
Jeff Daniels is the doctor in town.
Now he what a fuck?
Yeah, he's like, oh, it's bad luck to not be making love.
And while they're making love, we see our spider
who's traveled all this way.
Our spider meets a new spider in the barn.
And there's the second where the two spiders are just staring each other.
And it's like, are they talking?
They start playing only you.
So the old doctor in town's going to retire. Jeff Daniels is going to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the job to to the job to to the job to to the job is going to the job to to to the job to to the job to to to to to to to to to make thi. And the job thi. And the is the? they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's making they's they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they's they's thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And thi. And to thi. And to to to thi. And to to to to to to to to to to to to to took. tooke? tooke. tak. tak. tak. tooke. tooke. tooke. tooke. tooke. tooke. they're they're tooke. the. th like are they talking? They start playing only you. So the old doctor in town is going to retire.
Jeff Daniels is going to take her over the job.
Every time you say Jeff Daniels, I think it's wrong.
I'm so sorry.
Should I call him Dr. Ross Jennings?
Yes, please.
Thank you.
Dr. Ross Jennings.
It's so general hospital. Yeah, so, the the the the the the. the. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho, tho, tho, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I'm th. I th. I's is is. I's is. I's. I's. I's. I is is. I is. I is. I is. I is. I is. I is. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. thi. thi. I is the. thi. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. th. th. to. th, so we go and he, but he's like,
I haven't talked to the guy in four months,
so I'm gonna go chat with him tomorrow.
Do you move your entire, you're a woman befamled?
Yeah.
You gonna pick that whole family up?
No.
And just move and be like,
I should probably get touch decided not to. No.
Not leaving. This is also a weird era where it's before HMOs ran everything because you can
just see whichever doctor you want. Like imagine that world. You know what I mean? I do.
God I remember when HMOs became a thing and I was so confused by them. They're still kind of confusing. I think I'm still confused by them.
Yeah. Are they still a thing? Yeah. HMOs and PPO's and PIPOs. PIPOs?
POPs. At one point I knew what it was. I don't know.
We also meet, oh, what's the lady's name? Margaret? Is it Margaret the older lady the, the lady, the lady who the lady who the lady who the lady who th?? the the the th the th th the th th th the th the older lady who th thie thie thie thie thie thie thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th. th. th is th is th is th is th is still th is still th is still th is still still still still still thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th meet, what's the lady's name? Margaret? Is it Margaret
the older lady who gets him out of the parking ticket? Yeah. I fucking loved Margaret.
Margaret's cool. I love a no-nonsense, no bullshit old lady who's just like...
Faye from Wings? I'm kidding, we've talked about those, I've never watched wings. I know that it was two brothers that ran an airport?
Basically, just kidding. I just wanted to bring up Fay.
No, you're right though, the no-nonsense lady is so key.
Yeah, she's crouche.
Sorry, I talked all over you there.
I'm not to bring up Fay and I couldn't wait.
Oh yeah, the note, the note, the note,
the note.
You did highlight that. Is that your only highlighted note?
Yep.
Yep, yep, yep.
It's the only one that needed to be highlighted.
That's fine.
Margaret's cool.
Um, it's nasty Spider Town?
That's a note that I have.
I'd fuck up Deviled Eggs. That's a note that I have. Wish I could have majored in Jim? Also a note that I have.
I'd fuck up deviled eggs.
Hell yeah! I love deviled eggs.
You know what I wish I'd been doing in this movie?
Eating devil eggs.
That and counting the spindly leg shots where a spider just
over the edge of a table are like,
over the edge of like, you knowthe couch. Yeah down down a lamp. Yeah I love the like the spider legs that are just like
yeah they're just going away from the scene. Yes always. I can't say though I
like this movie is not scary. I don't know it feels like a kids movie. But the next
morning after I watched it I like had unplugged my cell phone and the charger was next to my pillow and I like moved in such a way that like the heavy
end of the charger fell off the side of my bed. Yeah. And I was like, who?
I was once driving down the highway and pulled my visor down because the
sun was in my eyes and when I did a spider fell out of my visor. Did you set your car on fire? I almost swerved off the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the. the. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the. the. the. tea te tea tea tea tea te. thea thea the. the. Did you set your car on fire? I almost
swerved off the highway. You should have wrecked the car because it belongs to
that spider now. I hope he has insurance because it is his his tooes. So for some
reason this doctor is a wine collector dealer? Is he dealing? He seemed like
like this was his money-making scheme that he was going to sell all these wine bottles to people. And he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was the they. He was the they. He was th. He was th. He was they. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was the th. He was th. He was the th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was th. He was t. He was the. He was theee. He was the. He was the. He was th. He was th. He was that he was going to sell all these wine bottles to people. And then he just starts downing them, which I really enjoyed. I didn't notice that.
So he's setting up a wine seller. Yeah. And this is when he finds out that all
of the floorboards are rotten, or all the joists. Yeah, which they're like not that concerned about. Like their children are just running around up there and they're like, well, we better get an exterminator in. You better get like a fucking contractor in there.
You know what I mean? That's the foundation of your home. Home. Didn't they have to have a,
a good Delaware exit, by the way? Didn't they have to have a home inspection? Shouldn't someone
have to their home inspection? Shouldn't someone have to to get a that house. Wait, do you not have to have an inspection if you pay cash?
I feel like it's easier.
I feel you have to get an inspection to get a mortgage?
No, that's not true.
Just a black market house.
Just forget about it.
So.
But the wife's just like, OK, well, we'll look into it.
Like I would lose my fucking shit. I think she just worried that her husband's a loose cannon. Because this day just wound up tight at this point.
Yeah, I mean, he's a doctor who has no patients, except one.
Except one.
Who is very healthy?
I like when he goes to Margaret's house and the cats outside,
he picks the cat up, cat up and sniffs it?
He kisses it.
Oh, he kisses it.
Oh, he kisses it? Yeah. Because at first I was like, who picks up someone else's cat? And then I was like, oh, me, I do that everywhere I go.
Yeah, he kisses it on its head.
That chip bridges.
I thought he just sniffed it, Daniels.
So they bring in Dilbert McClintock as the exterminator to see if they have turbites.
This is your John Goodman look.
John fucking Goodman. Yeah. I wish I could do the Bill Murray accent that he's doing but it's it's always going to sound like you're being a jerk you know. It's just
Caddy Jack voice. Yeah it's bad wood no termites and then we go to his response is to
just put Goodwood in. You gotta get. Deese, Deese point.
He's seemingly not the sharpest tool in the shed.
I think that's part of it, yeah.
Yeah.
So the coach of the high school football team
feels bad for the doctor not having any patients.
So he brings him in to ball tap, all the boys in the locker room.
Yeah, so I had to look this up. I remember having this done when I was a kid.
Yeah.
The doctor holds the testies and you cough.
And this is to determine whether or not you have a hernia.
Oh.
It's not just to emotionally scar you for the rest of your life's not changing it between them. So it's kind of just... Oh no, that's one glove, many balls.
You don't have a hernia, but now you have his grabs.
Yeah, right?
Now you all have that guy's grabs.
The quarterback dies from a spider bite.
He's blamed for it and called Dr. Death.
Yeah, I like that.
I like him being blamed for that. Like he and he could
because Margaret has died. Oh, that's right, Margaret also died, which I was sad
about. He was the last one to examine either of them. So clearly it's his fault.
And he's hell-bent on an autopsy. Right, because they're saying the
market died of a heart attack. He doesn't believe so. There's some shit about high blood pressure medication. It doesn't matter. Also is this town in the 1800? Who the fuck doesn't do an autopsy? A lot of people don't do
autopsies? What? Yeah, a lot of people. I mean, if there's no reason to like, if an old person
dies, you don't just saw them open. Right, but, all right. Sorry if I offended the non-autopsied.
I'm offended as a person who has not been autopsied.
Are you an autopsy today?
There's no such thing.
Autopsies never happened.
It's a false flag.
Oh, God.
So then the spider's just killing people. Spi shows up at a sleepover. But is it it it it it is it is it is it is it is it is it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's the the th, th, is th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I's th. I's thoffended thoffended thoffended thoffed the the tho-s tho-s tho-s the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the non the the the the the the non the the the non the the the the the the the the the on't the on't the on't thoffeffeffeffeffeffeffea thoffeaunted thoffeaunted thoffeaunted thoffeaunted thoffeaunted tho-sopsopsopsopsaunted tho-nopseaunted tho-nopseaunted tho-s. I then the spider's just killing people.
Spider shows up at a sleepover.
But is it all different spiders or is it just one spider at that point?
I like kind of don't know and don't care.
Well, there's now a nest of spiders.
But if they haven't hatched yet, so it's just this one.
Maybe. No, I'm saying,
when they talk about the nature stuff, I'm just like, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm. How did you feel about
the tomboy that the kids are hanging out with? The doctor's kids are hanging out, Bunny Beachwood.
Bunny did not get enough screen time. I'm more interested in what Bunny is doing than a lot Her apparently her other acting credit is hoverboard kid from Back to the Future too.
Oh, everyone's jealous moment.
Yeah.
Yeah, we're never getting those hoverboards.
And I should tell you 200 years in the future.
Still haven't happened.
Sorry guys.
It's just, it's just no, there's no way to monitor the traffic.
Just stay on the ground humans. Just fucking walk. You're so lazy. But I love Buddy when they're like,
mom, can we go play with Bunny?
And they're like, definitely go have fun.
And Bunny's like, do you want to blow up frogs with firecrackers?
Yeah. Hell yeah.
Hell yeah.
So they call in Dr. Warlock.
Who sends his assistant?
Yeah.
Dr. Glasses. Who, like, okay, he's a spider student or whatever.
Spider student.
Yeah.
And he has no way to catch spiders.
He's there to check out the spider infestation
and he's like catching spiders of the wine glass.
He's seemingly early on in his spider tutelage.
Yeah, I guess so.
Spider freshman. We, we, we, we didn't talk about the spider boob shot though, where the girl is in the
shower and the spider just crawls between her boobs.
Come on.
Come on.
Of the high school age daughter.
Yeah.
She's one who's majoring in gym.
Oh, man.
Yeah. Also, I have a note that's a the girl. Oh man.
Yeah.
Also, I have a note that says I wish this movie was called alleged arachnid.
So someone must have said that phrase and I really like it.
Is it because of the old doctor gets killed by a spider.
Did you recognize the old doctor's wife?
Yeah, she's grandma and everything. Yeah, she was the inn owner in in the mouth of madness. I feel like
she's been in one other thing we've done too. Yeah, she definitely has. She's
literally the grandmother in every movie. She has she has shed this mortal coil so
no longer the grandmother and everything. God rest her soul. She lived 92 years. It was a long time to live. Yeah it's too long. to. to to to to to to to the to the to the the the the the to the the the their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's the. She's the. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's too long. It's too long. Overstage your welcome a little bit, Graham, Graham.
So there's a spider in a cereal box scene, which everyone enjoys.
Yeah, the sheriff's cramming cereal into his gaping maw?
Like, don't be a dick.
I have the two notes back to back.
Spider in the cereal box.
Dad's got a shit. Because the coach really needs to go to the bathroom.
I don't really take a shit.
Until his wife reminds him them there's another bathroom, he's like, oh yeah.
Oh yeah, I guess I'll shit on that toilet.
Like, I only have one real to toilet in my house. It's one in the basement. Sure, Pittsburgh. thua. thua. to. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. toe. too. tooes. tooes. tooes. too. too. too. too. too. to to to to to to be to be to be too. too. too. too. too. too. It's. It's. too. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. too. t. too. too. too. too. too. t one of their toilets?
Yeah, I mean, I like to use, we have two as well, like one.
Where's your other bathroom?
It's in the basement.
No one's using a basement bathroom.
Sure you do, when you gotta.
What I'm saying is if you have two nice bathrooms.
Maybe there's the one that has all your magazine.
Maybe that's the one that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's their that's that's that's all your their their their their that's all your that's all your that's all your that's all your that's all all your that's all all all all all all all all all all all your their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the's true. I'm going to finish that issue of US News and
World Report. That's not what's next to your toilet. I've seen it. It's true.
So Julian Sands eventually shows up because the spider freshman is like, yeah this
isn't going to work out. I need you. Yeah and apparently
um... Yeah, this isn't gonna work out. I need you. Yeah, and apparently, um,
what, Warlock is the one who gets to decide whether the town gets quarantined? We should, wait, yeah. I thought it was the coroner who got to decide that.
It seemed like it was Julian Warlock.
Julian Sands. Julian Warlock Sands.
I love when John Goodman's character, Dilbert McClintock meets Julian Sands, Julian Warlock Sands. I love when John Goodman's character,
Dilbert McClintock, meets Julian Sands character,
because he walks in and he goes,
it's always good to meet someone
in the, like, in the same profession or whatever.
Yeah, yeah.
It's like, you're an exterminator, he's a professor, but I love it.
Can I tell you what else was cute?
was the coroner and his wife wife Wheel of Fortune eating popcorn under a blanket,
just like so fucking happy to be doing it?
It was just adorable.
It really was.
Wheel Fortune is the fucking worst.
Yeah, what do they do?
I hate Wheel of Fortune.
And they were so happy.
They take the makeup?
She's Mimi from the Drew Carey show for all of you young millennials out there.
Right, that show that was on when I was in junior high.
You're a millennial.
Barely.
So, I think 34 is just too old to be a millennial.
That's all.
Yeah.
I can't even like, I mean, we had the conversation earlier that I can't do Twitter
because I'm not a Kardashian.
And then if one of us is going to have to be a Kardashian, it has to be you.
Yeah, yeah. It's true. All right. I'll take the cardashion hit for the team. Thank you. There's a bunch of other stuff. There's like, uh. I mean, really, spiders get him.
It's really the plot.
Julian Sand sees a picture that Molly took of their barn.
And it's like, oh, that's where the shit's going down.
Right.
Because he's like, it's got to be goes and like provokes the spider.
What was he gonna do after he provoked it?
I don't understand that.
I do like that the provoking scene was foreshadowed earlier
when he was twang in a web and a spider came running at him,
but it was just a little guy in a cage.
Yes.
So he did it again.
But he's the foremost spiderman. Best bug boy.
Yeah.
I don't understand why you would do this.
And he talks about how spiders are cannibals so the, you know, the queen will keep
everyone away from her.
She's protective of her nest.
Right. Don't fucking provoke her.
I love that scene because a rat is caught in the spider web and then a cat is caught in the spider web and I wanted to just keep going up to a horse being on the spider.
And like a VW bug just stuck in the spider.
John Goodman is great in this movie by the way.
He should be in it more.
He doesn't get his fair shake.
He and bunny both.
Did you get as excited as I did when they were watching family ties and ties and the the the the the then Jeff Bridges breaks that TV for nothing. He just pushes it on the ground for no reason.
Why does he do that?
He's got some rage issues.
I guess.
He just shoves it on the ground.
Why?
Don't break your fucking TV.
You're gonna want that later.
Also, just more notes about Jeff Bridges.
this, Jeff Bridges that. Do you have a note that says Spider-Shovell fight?
No, I don't.
So, eventually Jeff Bridges, Daniels,
ends up going down to the basement and figuring out that the nest is down there
and the Queen Spider is down there as well.
And so is his wine collection.
His dream life wine cellar, because he's a white man in the suburbs
Is that what they want? Yeah, oh for sure is man cave
And so he is like oh, I'm gonna light this thing on fire and fix up two bottles of champagne like like a roof cliquet. Is it going to be fucking flammable? No
That's why New Year's isn't full of explosions.
You know what I mean? We would all be melted. The champagne was flammable.
Just bluches blowing up across the country. Honestly. I have the note hoisted on his own petard and I probably should have written down why I wrote that. I think I don't know let's see. Nope don't know. Oh I think it's because he tries
lighting the queen spider on fire and just lights his house on fire. Oh yeah well
it's got to be burned to the ground anyway TV's broken floor boards are bad.
Fuck it. I need new wood. Why does it stick to the fuse box like that when he hits it into the f. the the the the the the the the f f f f f. the the the the the f. the the the the the the the the f. the f-s the the the the the the the the the the the th. thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes th. Let's th. Let's th. Let's th. Let's th. Let's th. Let's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the. the. the. the. the. toy. toy. toy. toy. toy. toy. toy. toy. toy. toy. toy. toy. toy stick to the fuse box like that when he hits it into the fuse box?
It's like...
It got electrobecuted.
And it's pudding fell out.
I wish you hadn't said that phrase.
I don't like that.
No, it's fine.
Did you notice that the music playing during the scene was from Home Alone?
I didn't.
It basically is.
This movie felt very like Tim Burton adjacent, not that Home Alone is, but it just had like a,
if Tim Burton had somehow been involved in this, I wouldn't be surprised. Yeah, because it's sort of funny and sort of frightening and
full of orchestral Danny Elfman-esque. Yeah, almost like Almost like Peewe's Big Adventure type.
Yeah.
The perfect movie.
Indeed.
We can agree on that.
I did get creeped out when all the spiders were coming after them.
When they're just, yeah.
Yeah, that's the scariest scene.
But he's like, Jeff Bridges is doing all the stuff stuff,
running his hand down the banister like don't fucking touch anything to bridges you're a doctor you should know better
doctors never know anything in these movies they have like no sense I don't
think they know anything in real life either take that doctors you think
doctors are listening to this podcast are you a doctor and listening to this
podcast get in touch we want to hear from you because I just don't believe you exist. What else do they gonna listen to you during surgery? What if you were like doing surgery on someone?
And we were just like, fucking dicks, fart sack.
This is people making out, blah, blah, blah, blah.
I'm sorry, fucking dicks, fart sack.
Yeah. That's what I wanted to call this podcast.
I walked out of my house yesterday and looked over my neighbor's yard and there were two rats running around her trash can.
No, they're going to be in your house in like the next 24 hours.
And I went, huh, I'm afraid of rats. Are you? I found that out yesterday morning.
They're pretty cute though. I mean, they're carriers of disease and they like all these problems
and stuff but I'm just like oh man look at those things. It's just big mice. I don't
want mice around me either it turns out though. No. We have dogs that'll
probably help. It's true. It's true. It's true. How did you feel about the
the flaming flaming flaming flaming flaming the flaming the flaming flaming the flaming flaming the flaming flaming the flaming flaming flaming the flaming flaming flaming the flaming flaming flaming flaming the flaming flaming flaming flaming flaming flaming flaming flaming the flaming flaming flaming flaming flaming flaming flaming flaming flaming flaming the f flaming. How the f flaming. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How the f. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How the f. How the f. How the f. How the f. How the f. How the flaming. How. How the flaming. How. How the flaming. How the flaming. How the flaming. How the flaming. How the flaming. How the flaming. How the flaming. How the flaming. How the flaming. How the flaming. How the flaming. the flaming. the flaming. the flaming. the f. the flaming flamingwalk when he finally lights the queen on fire. I thought Alan loves this movie because there's a firewalk in it.
I was real stooped.
It's a spider, but it'll do.
Yeah.
That spider is seriously the size of like a terrier puppy.
Yeah, it's huge.
It's enormous.
It's enormous.
I love all the shots of its eyes. Do you. It's like, the th. It's, they. It's, they. they. they. th. th. th. th. th. th. they. th. thi. thi. they. thi. they. thi. thi. thi. thoes. thoes. thoes. thi. It's. they. their. their. It's, their. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's like. It's like. It's like. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. It's like. It's like. It's like. It's. It's. It's like almost cute. Well that's the thing, like, spider don't have a face really.
No.
So like when they, when those two spiders meet earlier on,
it's like...
Just vacant.
Oh, I see what they're after now.
Yeah.
And then we're back in San Francisco because the house part down.
It was a, and he didn't have a job and Bunny was a bad influence. They're all like oh man it's
good to be back in San Francisco where we know what's going on. Earthquake
Yeah I feel like earthquakes were hot in them in the like uh
no sure when did this movie come out? 1990 oh I thought it was later than that
no never mind then I feel like earthquakes hadn't hit their peak hotness yet
that's San Andreas fault everybody was talking about. I don't
mean. I do. I was in elementary school. It was a big, like, it was talked about
often back then. Yeah, not anymore. You guys are still in that fault. All you guys keep
moving out there, it's full of fault. Maybe they just don't want to talk about it anymore.
I guess they're like it's just inevitable. Do you want to hear my extremely topical joke that I wrote at the end of this?
I would love to hear it.
You're back in San Francisco.
If you thought spiders are bad,
way do you get those tech bros?
Boom!
Oh my god, your pride is just so good right now. Oh my God, you're a thing and go, God, you're a fucking idiot?
Every moment of my life.
Everything I compose on Twitter and then delete, yeah.
Katie, that is a recnaphobia.
I had not seen this movie since a few, probably like, 1992.
Oh.
When I think I talked about this last week, they showed it at the overnight, the Youth Center from the Summer Camp, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, thi, thi, thi, thi,talked about this last week, they showed it at the overnight, the youth center
from the summer camp.
We, oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
And then when I was thinking like, wow,
that was a really fucked up idea,
I remember that also with that overnight,
they had everybody go into the gym,
and you sat in a circle and everybody had a number, and the number, and the number, and the number, and they had the number, and the number, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, they they they they they they they. And they. And they. And their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their.............. Yeah. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. their. their. their. their. their. their. Yeah, their. Yeah, their had to pillow fight the other person who like whose number they pulled. Yeah. 12 year olds there and I was maybe like six. Did you
woove him? Oh, I got I got whopped. Oh, I'm sorry. There's an adult hitting me with
a pillow. You're four-year-shy shiying driving. Yeah. Oh, the youth center. Yeah, and yeah, I used to do real weird shit with kids.
Yeah, I feel like you can't do that.
You just can't hit children like you used to.
You can't pit them against each other.
It literally was like child fight club.
Two kids enter, one kid leaves.
Yeah, guess who didn't?
Oh, little Katie.
Little Katie was always small for her age. I didn't hit this growth spurten to th shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit sirtirtirt shit s shit shit s shit shit shit shit shit shit s shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit to to to to to th. th. th't? Oh, little Katie. Little Katie was always small for her age and it hit this growth spurred until like late high school.
I wouldn't guess you're six-seven now. I know I have to duck going into
doors. Who will walk in sideways for some reason? Do you want to ruck? Do you want to recnerate this movie? Yeah. This is fun? It is fun. It is fun. It is fun. It is fun. It's fun. It's a very very. It's a very very. It's a very very very. It's a very very. It's a very very very very fun. It's a fun. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. It's a great. I. I. I. I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this. I this. I this. I this. I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this, I this. I this. I this this this this th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I this th. I thi. I thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this thisnerate this movie? Yeah.
This is fun.
It is fun.
It's very fun.
It's too long.
It's got, it's got people you like.
It's got John Goodman.
Yep. It's got warlock.
It's got everybody's grandma.
It's got everybody's grandma.
Gammuels.
It's got bunny.
I enjoy this and I think it's I think it's a good fun time.
I'm going to give it a seven and a half. Seven and a half. I'm going to give this movie a six. Whoa, that's a low rating I'm surprised. That draggy middle, that middle was like bumming me out of how boring it got. When you say the middle, which parts are you talking about?
Because I don't remember.
The party scene, even though the deviled eggs were exciting.
Yeah.
Like the whole coach and coach's daughter in the bathrooms.
That stuff was fine.
Anything with spiders I was fine with,
but just like anything without spiders?
I was like, thrown not spiders? I'm maybe got a racnophobia. This movie's called fucking spiders. It's called alleged arachnid.
Spider, Spider, Spider, Spider,
why am I not watching spiders?
Why are their eggs?
So, but yeah, I've, you know,
it was fun.
It was definitely, I watched it a few years ago,
and I hated it. in the pissy mood. That was a pissy boy back then. Well that's all I thought about Return of the Living Dead if you recall. Yeah, but yeah I would never talk anyone out of watching
this movie. Oh my gosh, if someone said should I watch Arachnophobia I'd say, duh. I'm not good.
I think the puns just aren't going to fly tonight. This movie is a 91% on rotten tomatoes. Oh, that's really good. People like this movie, yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, I'm glad.
I was going to put a bunch of spider facts in this episode.
Ooh.
And then I started reading them.
And then I started grossing myself out,
because spiders are fucking disgusting.
They do see me echo. And I was like, I want this to be fun and not make this this this this this thuuuuuuuu this this this thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun to be fun and to be fun and to be fun and to be fun and to be fun and to be fun and to be fun and to be fun and to be fun and to be fun and fun and to be fun and to be fun glad we live in a place that spiders don't live.
They're not up here.
They're just in the South.
OK.
We got them brown recluses out here.
Yeah.
Mm-mm.
Mm-mm.
Mm-mm.
We've got rattlesnakes, too.
I've heard that. I guess we have coyotes. That is fucking not true. It is true. Where is there a coyote? Uh, in my neighborhood?
No.
But definitely in Washington County.
Oh, that's really far from here.
Not far.
No.
There's no coyotes.
You know what all those animals have in common?
No.
The predators.
And?
Katie.
April's a of Cryptocurium's
parcel of terror?
Yeah?
Is the Predator edition?
How did you do that?
That was really good.
That was really good.
Oh, thank you so much.
Wow.
We're fucking pros at this shit.
Honestly, it's like we should get paid for this.
We do.
Thanks, Jason.
Is our friend at Crypto Curium who makes the amazing parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel parcel th. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that's. that's that's that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that that that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. friend at Cryptocurium, who makes the amazing parcel of terror.
It's a monthly subscription box that you can get delivered to your door for just 35 bucks a month,
and it comes in its full of cool handmade horror stuff.
Yeah, we just got the ghost box from him.
Oh yeah, ghost box.
It's fucking sweet. It's got a flying Dutchman plaque and the pig ghost face from from a Amityville horror.
Ugh. Yeah, I opened a box and I was like,
oh, why is that?
Why is that?
Don't you want to open a box and go, why is that?
I don't want to get something that you ordered that creeps you out when it gets to you?
Where you're like, who did? What twist? It makes a beautiful stuff? Jason. It's Jason. He makes a beautiful stuff.
He makes a beautiful stuff.
It makes a spice and meat the ball.
A pig, a magnet.
Ah.
How would one get a Crypto Curiam parcel of terror?
It's simple.
Is it?
Yeah, you set $35 aside.
Under your bed? You buy $35 worth of Bitcoin. Can you, well, do they th a th a they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they the they they they they they thi thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. It make th. It make. It make. It make. It make. It make. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. It's thi. It's to to to to to to to tooooooi. It makes toi. It's make toi. It makes toi. It makes a too. It makes a tipe You buy $35 worth of Bitcoin.
Well, do they take money order?
Bitcoin? Yes.
You go to Cryptocurium.com.
Parcel of Terror, which is one of the T.A.bs.
You hit a T.U.
You send 35 bucks to Jason.
Just do it with regular old American money.
Don't mess around with that Bitcoin shit.
But maybe he likes cryptocurrency. Jason, what are you doing?
What are you doing?
I just said whale house.
What is a whale house?
So yeah, Predator editions coming up.
You love the Predator.
Go back and listen to the Predator episode we did with the amazing Justin Gray.
He loves that movie.
Yeah, it's not a horror movie.
It's not a horror movie. You don't big a whale house would have to be?
It's the ocean.
The whole ocean is a whale house.
That's why I don't go in there.
Whale's being pooping there.
I know.
Using it, our toy oceans is their toilPTO-C-U-R-I-U-M dot.
B-I-T-C-O-I-N.
No, I don't know.
I'm just kidding.
Katie.
Alan?
Can I hit you up with something?
And I know you love.
Uh-ohue. We got a review on iTunes. You know I love reading these. They just are, it's just so good for you guys.
Red leather, yellow leather.
My favorite podcast.
Really?
By squirrel sandwich.
Rating five stars.
You ever eat a squirrel?
Have I or would I?
Both?
My dogs try constantly, but but I never pants out for him.
Maybe you just gotta get two pieces of bread and make a little squirrel sandwich.
White bread of course. I listen to several podcasts sporadically.
But wherewulf ambulance is always my first and most listened to choice.
Oh, that's awesome. I'm usually at work and I'm pretty sure that my boss thinks I'm out of my mind because of how frequently I'm laughing to myself.
Maybe you're crazy, maybe you are. Maybe you're not even really listening to us.
Maybe you're just laughing to yourself like a Danny Glover and saw.
We've actually never done a podcast. I don't even, what are we doing right now?
It's really hard to gaslight something that someone tel to be true. It. It. It's. It's. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. th. th. th. th. thu. th. thu. that that that that that thus thus thus. thus. thus thus thus thus. th. Maybe you're th. Maybe you're th. Maybe you're th. Maybe th. Maybe th. Maybe th. Maybe th. Maybe th. Maybe th. Maybe th. th. Maybe th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Maybe. thi. I thi. I's thi. I's thi. I's thi. I's thi. I's thi. I's thi. Maybe thee. Maybe thi. Maybe you're thi. Maybe thi. Maybe thi. Maybe thi. Maybe thi. I's really hard to gaslight something that someone tel told it. Thank you.
Scroll Saarmuch. Hey, thank you. That's awesome. You could go to iTunes and leave us your
review. I can't. Well, yeah, but I never have. I probably should. I've never done it either.
Let's do it. Let's make ourselves look better. One star. These two fuckholes.
Shed shit huts. Katie's pretty alright though
heard katy's ugly
are we just doing what the internet we think the internet thinks of us
yeah
Alan laughs too much
really do we have gotten that review
yeah that one's funny though I like that
We've got other reviews people say they like my laughing.
I think it's fine.
Hey, you do a podcast, a podcast with someone who brings you nothing but joy and you will laugh a lot too.
Thanks, thank you, thank you.
I'm also full of mirth.
Go to Facebook, in dutch with us there.
Instagram, Twitter.
Where of ambulance, use one of them, find us? Where of Ambulance at Gmail.com.
You got it.
And what do we do next week?
You want to do another one of these?
Another movie? Another podcast?
Why don't we get back into our warmest,
warmest, warmest little, little sleeping bag of movie time,
you mean the one we cut open that man's stomach and culling? We know from the thing that man is the warmest place on her. Sure.
Let's go with a little M-Night.
I am so excited.
What are we doing?
You want to do the village?
It's on Netflix?
Let's do the village.
Guys, we're going to do the village.
We're just going to work through his to me. Because Netflix is, because Netflix is, just because they are. Talk to Netflix about getting better movies and we'll do more movies.
The Sixth Sense was excellent and we both agreed.
It's true.
Maybe, let's see what we think about the village next week.
Okay.
Oh wait, I guess we have to finish this thing, huh?
I can't just walk away now.
No, I don't, I just feel just feel just feel just feel just feel just feel just feel just feel just feel just feel just feel just feel th just feel like there there there th just feel like there's something unsaid. I'll, uh, I'll see you later.
Thanks for being here.
Thank you for me.
Oh.
Travel down and running back again.
Thanks for listening to another episode of a werewolf ambulance.
Bye. the